1 00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:37,037 [birds chirping] 2 00:00:38,821 --> 00:00:41,041 [children chattering faintly] 3 00:00:42,085 --> 00:00:44,131 [dog barking] 4 00:00:47,221 --> 00:00:50,050 [laughter] 5 00:00:57,100 --> 00:01:00,277 -[birds chirping] -[traffic rumbling quietly] 6 00:01:00,321 --> 00:01:02,410 [children chattering faintly] 7 00:01:03,541 --> 00:01:05,500 [faint, indistinct chatter continues] 8 00:01:11,897 --> 00:01:15,075 STELLA: We never speak about what happened in Belfast. 9 00:01:17,338 --> 00:01:19,340 -[bell jingling] -[quiet chatter] 10 00:01:21,603 --> 00:01:23,692 ♪ ♪ 11 00:01:29,045 --> 00:01:33,005 Perhaps because beforehand we were so full of hope. 12 00:01:33,049 --> 00:01:35,095 -CHILD: Hi, Mrs. Gilmore. -YOUNG STELLA: Hello. 13 00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:38,489 [gunshots] 14 00:01:41,666 --> 00:01:43,973 [children screaming] 15 00:01:48,717 --> 00:01:50,806 ♪ ♪ 16 00:01:52,721 --> 00:01:55,898 STELLA: But a single day can change the course of any life. 17 00:02:01,208 --> 00:02:03,210 [medical monitor beeping] 18 00:02:04,950 --> 00:02:06,996 [babies crying] 19 00:02:11,827 --> 00:02:13,916 ♪ ♪ 20 00:02:18,181 --> 00:02:20,966 Leaving Ireland, leaving our home... 21 00:02:23,839 --> 00:02:25,971 ...alone, 22 00:02:26,015 --> 00:02:29,149 unmoored, adrift. 23 00:02:35,024 --> 00:02:37,766 -And now... -GERRY: Five? 24 00:02:37,809 --> 00:02:42,423 ...we seem to have become exiles from each other 25 00:02:42,466 --> 00:02:44,947 and the promises we made. 26 00:02:44,990 --> 00:02:47,210 [blows softly] 27 00:02:47,254 --> 00:02:49,299 The promise I made. 28 00:02:50,518 --> 00:02:52,955 ♪ Oh-oh, yes ♪ 29 00:02:52,998 --> 00:02:56,219 ♪ I'm the great pretender ♪ 30 00:02:56,263 --> 00:02:57,829 ["The Great Pretender" by The Platters playing] 31 00:02:57,873 --> 00:03:02,617 ♪ Pretending that I'm doing well ♪ 32 00:03:03,922 --> 00:03:06,925 ♪ My need is such ♪ 33 00:03:06,969 --> 00:03:09,885 ♪ I pretend too much ♪ 34 00:03:09,928 --> 00:03:11,930 ♪ I'm lonely ♪ 35 00:03:11,974 --> 00:03:16,152 [over radio]: ♪ But no one can tell... ♪ 36 00:03:16,196 --> 00:03:17,849 Bye, then. 37 00:03:18,894 --> 00:03:20,548 Bye, darling. 38 00:03:22,158 --> 00:03:24,856 Sure I can't tempt you? 39 00:03:24,900 --> 00:03:26,597 What's that? 40 00:03:27,685 --> 00:03:29,034 [Stella chuckles] 41 00:03:29,078 --> 00:03:32,037 ♪ I played the game ♪ 42 00:03:32,081 --> 00:03:34,475 ♪ But to my real shame ♪ 43 00:03:34,518 --> 00:03:36,216 -[door opens] -♪ You've left me ♪ 44 00:03:36,259 --> 00:03:38,218 -[door closes] -♪ To grieve... ♪ 45 00:03:39,958 --> 00:03:42,178 [dogs barking in distance] 46 00:03:46,269 --> 00:03:48,706 CONGREGATION: ♪ Snow had fallen ♪ 47 00:03:48,750 --> 00:03:51,448 ♪ Snow on snow ♪ 48 00:03:51,492 --> 00:03:55,278 ♪ Snow on snow... ♪ 49 00:03:55,322 --> 00:03:57,889 PRIEST: The body of Christ. 50 00:03:57,933 --> 00:03:59,326 -James... -Amen. 51 00:03:59,369 --> 00:04:02,459 ...chapter four, verse 14 tells us 52 00:04:02,503 --> 00:04:06,985 you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. 53 00:04:09,118 --> 00:04:10,989 What is your life? 54 00:04:11,033 --> 00:04:15,733 You are a mist that appears for a little while 55 00:04:15,777 --> 00:04:17,735 and then vanishes. 56 00:04:17,779 --> 00:04:21,522 On this night of the year more than any other, 57 00:04:21,565 --> 00:04:24,786 we are reminded to cherish those... 58 00:04:24,829 --> 00:04:26,788 STELLA: I just wanted to say, have a lovely Christmas. 59 00:04:26,831 --> 00:04:29,269 -Oh, happy Christmas, dear. -Yeah, so nice to see you. 60 00:04:29,312 --> 00:04:30,618 -Yeah. -See you soon. 61 00:04:30,661 --> 00:04:32,097 Okay. 62 00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:35,318 Good night. Happy Christmas to you. 63 00:04:35,362 --> 00:04:36,711 -Merry Christmas. -Good night. 64 00:04:36,754 --> 00:04:38,539 [chuckling]: Oh, sorry. 65 00:04:45,415 --> 00:04:47,678 [sighs, sniffs] 66 00:04:48,766 --> 00:04:50,681 [groans, sniffs] 67 00:04:50,725 --> 00:04:53,336 [locks clicking] 68 00:04:56,208 --> 00:04:57,253 STELLA: I'm back. 69 00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:58,907 [chuckling]: It's freezing out there. 70 00:04:58,950 --> 00:05:01,039 [Gerry snoring] 71 00:05:12,660 --> 00:05:14,357 [sighs] 72 00:05:23,932 --> 00:05:25,934 [snoring continues] 73 00:05:31,069 --> 00:05:34,116 [classical music playing faintly over headphones] 74 00:05:45,475 --> 00:05:47,129 [sighs] 75 00:06:12,981 --> 00:06:14,983 [faint, distant chatter] 76 00:06:59,027 --> 00:07:01,116 ♪ ♪ 77 00:07:11,866 --> 00:07:13,694 [door opens] 78 00:07:17,393 --> 00:07:19,047 [sets plate down] 79 00:07:26,707 --> 00:07:29,536 [takes deep breath] 80 00:07:51,209 --> 00:07:53,298 [printer whirring] 81 00:08:05,310 --> 00:08:07,356 [choral music playing quietly] 82 00:08:10,620 --> 00:08:12,753 STELLA: It's ringing. 83 00:08:12,796 --> 00:08:14,755 It's the answer machine. 84 00:08:14,798 --> 00:08:16,365 -GERRY: Leave a message. -Aye. 85 00:08:16,408 --> 00:08:18,149 [phone beeps] 86 00:08:19,281 --> 00:08:22,197 Hi, Michael. It's Mum and Dad here. 87 00:08:22,240 --> 00:08:23,807 Not sure what time it is 88 00:08:23,851 --> 00:08:25,287 -where you are. -GERRY: Merry Christmas, son. 89 00:08:25,330 --> 00:08:27,028 Give Toby a kiss from Granddad. 90 00:08:27,071 --> 00:08:28,986 [chuckles] 91 00:08:29,030 --> 00:08:31,728 Just calling to see how you and the family are settling in. 92 00:08:31,772 --> 00:08:34,209 You know, first Christmas in your new abode. 93 00:08:34,252 --> 00:08:38,213 All right, well, uh, we're around, so... 94 00:08:39,606 --> 00:08:41,303 Lots of love. 95 00:08:41,346 --> 00:08:43,392 [choral music continues playing quietly] 96 00:08:58,755 --> 00:09:00,452 What's this? 97 00:09:00,496 --> 00:09:02,237 Surprise. 98 00:09:04,195 --> 00:09:05,762 Don't tell me. Don't tell me. 99 00:09:05,806 --> 00:09:07,155 [Stella chuckling] 100 00:09:07,198 --> 00:09:08,417 Shoes. 101 00:09:08,460 --> 00:09:10,332 [both chuckling] 102 00:09:12,029 --> 00:09:14,641 It's a little something-- for both of us. 103 00:09:19,863 --> 00:09:22,039 GERRY: Amsterdam? 104 00:09:22,083 --> 00:09:24,825 I thought it was time for an adventure. 105 00:09:26,609 --> 00:09:30,004 That's... fantastic. 106 00:09:30,047 --> 00:09:31,962 [both laughing] 107 00:09:32,006 --> 00:09:34,530 -[stammers] Flights, hotel? -Mm. 108 00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:37,794 You've outdone yourself, Mrs. Gilmore. 109 00:09:37,838 --> 00:09:39,796 Start the New Year off with a bang. 110 00:09:39,840 --> 00:09:41,319 You'd better believe it. 111 00:09:41,363 --> 00:09:43,583 [both laughing] 112 00:09:43,626 --> 00:09:46,063 [sighs] You and me. 113 00:09:46,107 --> 00:09:47,587 Me and you. 114 00:09:50,894 --> 00:09:53,941 ♪ ♪ 115 00:09:53,984 --> 00:09:55,856 GERRY: Do you have the passports, or do I? 116 00:09:55,899 --> 00:09:57,858 STELLA: Passports, eye drops, phone charger. 117 00:09:57,901 --> 00:09:59,250 All in your shoulder bag. 118 00:09:59,294 --> 00:10:00,948 GERRY: What about my special shampoo? 119 00:10:00,991 --> 00:10:03,167 STELLA: That, too. 120 00:10:03,211 --> 00:10:06,127 Uh, what's the limit again? 121 00:10:08,172 --> 00:10:10,348 That's six minutes. 122 00:10:10,392 --> 00:10:12,307 Someone whose opinion I trust 123 00:10:12,350 --> 00:10:15,658 once said I was flamboyant wearing this. 124 00:10:15,702 --> 00:10:19,096 I was never entirely sure whether that was a good thing 125 00:10:19,140 --> 00:10:21,359 or a bad thing. 126 00:10:21,403 --> 00:10:23,100 Oh, no, the knot's all wrong. 127 00:10:23,144 --> 00:10:24,841 -What? -Here. 128 00:10:25,886 --> 00:10:27,714 [Gerry sighs] 129 00:10:27,757 --> 00:10:29,150 STELLA: Right. 130 00:10:32,414 --> 00:10:33,850 -[Stella giggling] -Don't choke me. 131 00:10:33,894 --> 00:10:35,765 -It's tempting. -[laughing] 132 00:10:37,114 --> 00:10:38,725 -All right. -There. 133 00:10:38,768 --> 00:10:40,901 -That's better. -Yeah. That's good. 134 00:10:40,944 --> 00:10:43,512 -Okay. I'll... -Right. 135 00:10:43,555 --> 00:10:45,775 Oh, that's seven minutes. I'm calling them. 136 00:10:45,819 --> 00:10:47,081 [car horn honking] 137 00:10:47,124 --> 00:10:48,648 Uh, there's the taxi now. 138 00:10:48,691 --> 00:10:50,475 Oh! 139 00:10:50,519 --> 00:10:52,564 Right. Uh... 140 00:10:52,608 --> 00:10:55,306 -Uh, case. -Right. 141 00:10:55,350 --> 00:10:57,526 -Is that everything? -Uh, yeah. Think so. 142 00:10:57,569 --> 00:10:59,528 Sure? [sighs] 143 00:10:59,571 --> 00:11:01,965 [locks clicking] 144 00:11:12,846 --> 00:11:14,891 ♪ ♪ 145 00:11:23,291 --> 00:11:25,946 [indistinct chatter] 146 00:11:25,989 --> 00:11:27,687 Well, some people have more luggage than sense. 147 00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:28,949 There it is. 148 00:11:31,255 --> 00:11:33,649 GERRY: Where did you say the shampoo was again? 149 00:11:35,085 --> 00:11:37,131 [indistinct chatter] 150 00:11:40,787 --> 00:11:43,093 Sweet before takeoff, modom? 151 00:11:47,141 --> 00:11:48,882 [chiming] 152 00:11:48,925 --> 00:11:50,187 FLIGHT ATTENDANT: For everyone's comfort and safety, 153 00:11:50,231 --> 00:11:52,494 would you please place all hand baggage 154 00:11:52,537 --> 00:11:54,235 under the seats in front of you 155 00:11:54,278 --> 00:11:56,933 or in the overhead lockers, providing they will close. 156 00:11:58,979 --> 00:12:00,763 Oh. Nearly forgot. 157 00:12:00,807 --> 00:12:02,112 What? 158 00:12:03,897 --> 00:12:06,377 -Stop you from being sick. -How? 159 00:12:07,639 --> 00:12:09,903 It's a wristband. 160 00:12:09,946 --> 00:12:12,732 Someone at church recommended them. 161 00:12:14,559 --> 00:12:17,127 Presses on your pulse point here. 162 00:12:17,171 --> 00:12:19,434 I'd be better off saying a prayer. 163 00:12:19,477 --> 00:12:22,176 Please, God, don't make me vomit on this flight. 164 00:12:22,219 --> 00:12:24,482 [Gerry laughs] 165 00:12:30,358 --> 00:12:33,143 -[bells chiming] -[birds chirping] 166 00:12:37,713 --> 00:12:39,759 ♪ ♪ 167 00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:52,249 [sighs] 168 00:12:53,816 --> 00:12:55,339 -STELLA: All right? -GERRY: Yeah. 169 00:12:55,383 --> 00:12:57,037 STELLA: Looks nice. 170 00:13:02,607 --> 00:13:04,044 -GERRY: Hello. -STELLA: Hello. 171 00:13:04,087 --> 00:13:05,480 -RECEPTIONIST: Hello. -GERRY: How are you? 172 00:13:05,523 --> 00:13:06,873 RECEPTIONIST: Welcome to Amsterdam. 173 00:13:06,916 --> 00:13:08,265 STELLA: Thank you. 174 00:13:08,309 --> 00:13:10,311 -Oh. [sniffs] -[Gerry clears throat] 175 00:13:12,226 --> 00:13:13,662 [Stella chuckles] 176 00:13:15,011 --> 00:13:16,665 -[sniffs] -[bell dings] 177 00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:19,233 Here we are. 178 00:13:19,276 --> 00:13:20,800 [Gerry grunts] 179 00:13:25,717 --> 00:13:28,372 STELLA: Huh. Hard to tell. 180 00:13:30,766 --> 00:13:32,507 GERRY: Let's try this way. 181 00:13:34,465 --> 00:13:36,163 Yeah, this is it. 182 00:13:44,345 --> 00:13:46,129 [groans, sighs] 183 00:13:46,173 --> 00:13:48,436 -Try the other one. -[sighs] 184 00:13:50,133 --> 00:13:51,439 -[beeps] -BOTH: Oh. 185 00:13:51,482 --> 00:13:53,354 -There you go. We're in. -[laughs] 186 00:13:54,355 --> 00:13:56,313 Let there be... 187 00:13:57,575 --> 00:13:59,273 -...light. -[chuckles] 188 00:13:59,316 --> 00:14:01,753 Oh, very nice. 189 00:14:01,797 --> 00:14:03,190 Oh. 190 00:14:03,233 --> 00:14:05,714 It's bigger than I thought. 191 00:14:05,757 --> 00:14:06,976 It's lovely. 192 00:14:07,020 --> 00:14:08,586 GERRY: Yeah. 193 00:14:11,502 --> 00:14:14,375 STELLA: Oh, would you look at that gray sky? 194 00:14:17,595 --> 00:14:19,032 [horn honks in distance] 195 00:14:20,163 --> 00:14:22,078 Maybe next time, you book somewhere 196 00:14:22,122 --> 00:14:23,993 in one of the sunnier hemispheres? 197 00:14:24,037 --> 00:14:25,777 [Stella chuckling] 198 00:14:27,475 --> 00:14:29,303 Time to test the bed. 199 00:14:32,001 --> 00:14:33,785 -[groans] -[Stella chuckles] 200 00:14:33,829 --> 00:14:35,787 -[sighs] -How is it? 201 00:14:35,831 --> 00:14:37,528 Hard as a brick runway. 202 00:14:37,572 --> 00:14:39,095 [both laugh] 203 00:14:39,139 --> 00:14:41,097 [sighs] Perfect. 204 00:14:41,141 --> 00:14:43,230 In fact, uh... 205 00:14:43,273 --> 00:14:45,319 I might have a wee snooze. 206 00:14:45,362 --> 00:14:46,973 Oh, it's the middle of the afternoon. 207 00:14:47,016 --> 00:14:48,670 So? 208 00:14:48,713 --> 00:14:50,715 So, you never take a nap in the middle of the afternoon. 209 00:14:50,759 --> 00:14:53,022 Yeah, but we're on holiday. It's always different. 210 00:14:53,066 --> 00:14:56,156 -You don't mind, do you? -Oh, if you insist. 211 00:14:56,199 --> 00:14:58,723 -Half an hour. No more. -[both laughing] 212 00:14:58,767 --> 00:15:00,160 Chocolate, sir? 213 00:15:00,203 --> 00:15:01,422 Oh, thank you, modom. 214 00:15:01,465 --> 00:15:03,119 [Stella chuckles] 215 00:15:03,163 --> 00:15:04,773 [Gerry sighs] 216 00:15:10,953 --> 00:15:12,607 Oh, lovely. 217 00:15:13,738 --> 00:15:15,523 This is the life. 218 00:15:15,566 --> 00:15:17,003 [Stella chuckles] 219 00:15:21,616 --> 00:15:23,096 [Stella chuckles softly] 220 00:15:23,139 --> 00:15:25,185 ♪ ♪ 221 00:15:28,101 --> 00:15:30,494 -Ooh. -[both chuckle] 222 00:15:30,538 --> 00:15:31,582 [elevator bell dings] 223 00:15:31,626 --> 00:15:33,236 -Ah. Hello. -Hello. 224 00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:34,803 Good evening. 225 00:15:34,846 --> 00:15:37,371 Um, could you recommend somewhere not too pricey 226 00:15:37,414 --> 00:15:40,200 -for a drink this evening? -You are in the right place. 227 00:15:40,243 --> 00:15:42,158 Amsterdam is so full of options. 228 00:15:42,202 --> 00:15:43,681 -Right. -Oh. 229 00:15:43,725 --> 00:15:45,683 [traffic light clicking rapidly] 230 00:15:45,727 --> 00:15:47,729 -[distant siren] -[lively chatter] 231 00:15:49,818 --> 00:15:51,124 [bicycle bell dings] 232 00:15:51,167 --> 00:15:52,995 ["The Mermaid" by Folksurprise playing] 233 00:15:53,039 --> 00:15:56,607 ♪ And the ocean waves do roll ♪ 234 00:15:56,651 --> 00:15:59,697 ♪ And the stormy winds do blow... ♪ 235 00:15:59,741 --> 00:16:02,962 STELLA: Trust you to find the only Irish pub in Amsterdam. 236 00:16:04,311 --> 00:16:07,053 God, a well-built ant could piss more. 237 00:16:07,096 --> 00:16:08,924 STELLA: And that's a double. 238 00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:10,186 You're learning. 239 00:16:10,230 --> 00:16:12,275 Killing you with kindness. 240 00:16:15,191 --> 00:16:16,671 You and me. 241 00:16:17,715 --> 00:16:19,543 Me and you. 242 00:16:19,587 --> 00:16:22,459 ♪ This pretty mermaid has warned me of our doom... ♪ 243 00:16:22,503 --> 00:16:25,680 I suppose we're lucky to have each other to ignore. 244 00:16:25,723 --> 00:16:27,073 [laughs] 245 00:16:27,116 --> 00:16:30,772 ♪ And the ocean waves do roll ♪ 246 00:16:30,815 --> 00:16:34,254 ♪ And the stormy winds do blow ♪ 247 00:16:34,297 --> 00:16:37,692 ♪ And we poor sailors are skipping at the top... ♪ 248 00:16:37,735 --> 00:16:41,348 The arrogance of amplification in a space this size. 249 00:16:41,391 --> 00:16:43,002 You used to like this one. 250 00:16:43,045 --> 00:16:45,743 ♪ While the landlubbers lie down below ♪ 251 00:16:45,787 --> 00:16:49,269 ♪ This pretty mermaid has warned me of our doom ♪ 252 00:16:49,312 --> 00:16:51,619 ♪ We will sink to the bottom of the sea ♪ 253 00:16:51,662 --> 00:16:53,229 [singing along]: ♪ For me ♪ 254 00:16:53,273 --> 00:16:57,059 ♪ And the ocean waves do roll ♪ 255 00:16:57,103 --> 00:17:00,628 ♪ And the stormy winds do blow ♪ 256 00:17:00,671 --> 00:17:02,978 [fading]: ♪ And we poor sailors... ♪ 257 00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,850 ♪ ♪ 258 00:17:05,894 --> 00:17:09,724 GERRY: You know, it's Ireland's greatest export: 259 00:17:09,767 --> 00:17:13,249 a bullshit lesson on how to enjoy yourself. 260 00:17:14,598 --> 00:17:17,079 -That and the car bomb. -Oh, would you... 261 00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:19,342 Would you come away from the edge? 262 00:17:19,386 --> 00:17:22,345 -Gives me the weirdest feeling. -What does? 263 00:17:28,308 --> 00:17:29,700 STELLA: Come on. 264 00:17:31,528 --> 00:17:34,792 -GERRY: All right. -All right. Hold my arm. 265 00:17:34,836 --> 00:17:36,881 You're a liability, you are. 266 00:17:36,925 --> 00:17:38,100 [bathwater running in other room] 267 00:17:38,144 --> 00:17:40,842 [reporter speaking Dutch over TV] 268 00:17:40,885 --> 00:17:42,974 [bathwater continues running] 269 00:17:51,331 --> 00:17:54,116 ♪ ♪ 270 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:56,553 -[birds chirping] -[children chattering faintly] 271 00:18:08,565 --> 00:18:10,480 [chatter in Dutch over TV] 272 00:18:10,524 --> 00:18:12,569 [bathwater continues running in other room] 273 00:18:28,846 --> 00:18:30,761 [bathwater stops] 274 00:18:32,023 --> 00:18:34,113 [splashing in other room] 275 00:18:34,156 --> 00:18:36,202 ♪ ♪ 276 00:18:38,421 --> 00:18:40,467 [TV continues in other room] 277 00:18:48,257 --> 00:18:50,694 [Dutch chatter, laughter over TV] 278 00:18:58,572 --> 00:19:00,748 [water splashing in other room] 279 00:19:06,493 --> 00:19:08,538 [bathwater draining in other room] 280 00:19:24,467 --> 00:19:26,165 [grunts softly] 281 00:19:29,472 --> 00:19:31,039 [changes channel] 282 00:19:31,082 --> 00:19:33,215 REPORTER [over TV]: Unlike the Provisional IRA, 283 00:19:33,259 --> 00:19:36,087 the new IRA possesses limited weaponry. 284 00:19:36,131 --> 00:19:39,482 It's enough to mount a campaign but not on the same scale 285 00:19:39,526 --> 00:19:42,398 as the paramilitary groups of the past. 286 00:19:42,442 --> 00:19:44,879 Following its ceasefire in 1994, 287 00:19:44,922 --> 00:19:47,186 the Provisional IRA decommissioned 288 00:19:47,229 --> 00:19:49,884 the bulk of its arsenal, much of it supplied by Libya... 289 00:19:49,927 --> 00:19:52,016 On and on it goes. 290 00:19:53,148 --> 00:19:54,628 Aye. 291 00:19:54,671 --> 00:19:57,021 Are you, uh, done in there? 292 00:19:57,065 --> 00:19:58,588 Aye. 293 00:19:58,632 --> 00:20:00,460 MAN [over TV]: Forensic examination has revealed 294 00:20:00,503 --> 00:20:03,071 that some of the weapons seized from dissident Republicans 295 00:20:03,114 --> 00:20:05,116 trace back to the original stockpiles 296 00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:07,075 of the Provisional IRA. 297 00:20:07,118 --> 00:20:10,818 There are some figures, some senior leadership figures, 298 00:20:10,861 --> 00:20:13,124 who never bought into the peace process... 299 00:20:13,168 --> 00:20:15,214 [TV continues quietly] 300 00:20:19,870 --> 00:20:21,568 [TV shuts off] 301 00:20:34,058 --> 00:20:36,147 S-Stella. 302 00:20:36,191 --> 00:20:37,627 Have you seen my statins? 303 00:20:43,546 --> 00:20:45,156 Stella. 304 00:20:45,200 --> 00:20:47,246 My statins-- have you seen them? 305 00:20:54,601 --> 00:20:56,646 [Gerry sighs] 306 00:20:59,170 --> 00:21:02,086 Have you looked in the wash bag? 307 00:21:02,130 --> 00:21:04,263 -Uh... -[Stella sighs] 308 00:21:11,879 --> 00:21:13,707 STELLA: Mm. There. 309 00:21:15,230 --> 00:21:16,710 Sorry. 310 00:21:29,026 --> 00:21:30,071 [exhales sharply] 311 00:21:30,114 --> 00:21:31,986 [breathing deeply] 312 00:21:32,029 --> 00:21:34,118 ♪ ♪ 313 00:21:46,870 --> 00:21:48,263 [bell clangs] 314 00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:49,656 STELLA: It's a religious community. 315 00:21:49,699 --> 00:21:51,135 GERRY: A convent? 316 00:21:51,179 --> 00:21:53,224 STELLA: Uh, no, uh, more like a sanctuary. 317 00:21:54,225 --> 00:21:55,357 I think it's that way. 318 00:21:55,401 --> 00:21:57,359 GERRY: You think or you know? 319 00:21:57,403 --> 00:21:59,230 'Cause having a map and knowing the way are not the same thing. 320 00:21:59,274 --> 00:22:00,797 STELLA: Oh, shush. 321 00:22:13,941 --> 00:22:15,943 Behold. 322 00:22:15,986 --> 00:22:17,814 The Begijnhof. 323 00:22:19,642 --> 00:22:21,340 -In there? -Mm. 324 00:22:23,907 --> 00:22:26,693 -Lead on. -[both chuckle] 325 00:22:26,736 --> 00:22:28,825 ♪ ♪ 326 00:22:40,097 --> 00:22:42,143 [Stella sighs] 327 00:22:42,186 --> 00:22:43,536 [chuckles] 328 00:22:45,538 --> 00:22:47,235 [hushed]: It's home to some of the oldest 329 00:22:47,278 --> 00:22:48,976 buildings in the city. 330 00:22:49,019 --> 00:22:51,457 For women who wanted to live alone. 331 00:22:51,500 --> 00:22:55,548 A sisterhood of unmarried Catholic women. 332 00:22:57,114 --> 00:23:01,423 In the 1600s, Catholic worship was... 333 00:23:01,467 --> 00:23:05,601 was banned by the Protestant powers that be. 334 00:23:05,645 --> 00:23:07,995 Why are we whispering? 335 00:23:08,038 --> 00:23:10,127 [Stella laughs] 336 00:23:12,521 --> 00:23:15,002 Public mass wasn't allowed, 337 00:23:15,045 --> 00:23:19,833 so they used to do it in their own homes, you know? 338 00:23:19,876 --> 00:23:21,443 In secret. 339 00:23:21,487 --> 00:23:23,837 Yeah, which is why it doesn't look like a church 340 00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:25,795 -from the outside. -It's camouflaged. 341 00:23:25,839 --> 00:23:29,712 They lived like nuns but... 342 00:23:29,756 --> 00:23:34,021 without all the... all the vows and what have you. 343 00:23:38,199 --> 00:23:39,592 Hmm. 344 00:23:44,553 --> 00:23:47,338 Reminds me of van Gogh's prison yard. 345 00:23:47,382 --> 00:23:49,166 Nonsense. 346 00:23:50,298 --> 00:23:51,473 Excuse me. 347 00:23:51,517 --> 00:23:54,215 Uh, is-is the church open yet? 348 00:23:54,258 --> 00:23:56,826 [Irish accent]: Which church were you hoping to see? 349 00:23:56,870 --> 00:23:58,393 [laughing]: Oh, you're Irish. 350 00:23:58,437 --> 00:23:59,699 -She's Irish. -[Gerry chuckles] 351 00:23:59,742 --> 00:24:01,440 Guilty as charged. 352 00:24:01,483 --> 00:24:04,747 Waterford originally, but I've lived all over, really. 353 00:24:04,791 --> 00:24:06,053 County Derry. 354 00:24:06,096 --> 00:24:07,968 From a townland nobody's heard of 355 00:24:08,011 --> 00:24:09,926 -in a place nobody knows. -[chuckles] 356 00:24:09,970 --> 00:24:11,232 Do you live here? 357 00:24:11,275 --> 00:24:14,322 Oh, yes, I'm one of the lucky ones. 358 00:24:14,365 --> 00:24:16,106 And what brings you to Amsterdam? 359 00:24:18,152 --> 00:24:20,415 Well, um... 360 00:24:20,459 --> 00:24:22,722 we're not getting any younger, so... 361 00:24:23,940 --> 00:24:25,594 -[chuckles] -[Stella chuckling] 362 00:24:25,638 --> 00:24:27,204 And tell me again, 363 00:24:27,248 --> 00:24:28,858 which of the churches was it you wanted to see? 364 00:24:28,902 --> 00:24:30,207 The Catholic one. 365 00:24:30,251 --> 00:24:31,557 Oh. 366 00:24:31,600 --> 00:24:32,862 It's just through here. 367 00:24:32,906 --> 00:24:35,169 Oh, thank you. 368 00:24:35,212 --> 00:24:36,562 -Okay. -Gerry. 369 00:25:11,597 --> 00:25:13,860 ♪ ♪ 370 00:25:33,662 --> 00:25:35,708 ♪ ♪ 371 00:25:54,944 --> 00:25:56,990 ♪ ♪ 372 00:26:03,910 --> 00:26:07,304 GERRY: "The miracle of Amsterdam." 373 00:26:10,264 --> 00:26:12,483 Ye olde graphic novel. 374 00:26:26,585 --> 00:26:31,938 "In the year 1345 in the city of Amsterdam, 375 00:26:31,981 --> 00:26:36,290 a man lay dying in a house on Kalverstraat." 376 00:26:36,333 --> 00:26:38,248 Solid opening gambit. 377 00:26:39,554 --> 00:26:43,471 "A priest came and gave the man communion. 378 00:26:43,514 --> 00:26:47,910 "After he had gone, the sick man felt so unwell 379 00:26:47,954 --> 00:26:50,391 that he vomited up the sacred host..." 380 00:26:50,434 --> 00:26:52,872 -Lovely. -"...into a bowl." 381 00:26:54,830 --> 00:26:57,050 That's really put me in the mood for lunch. 382 00:26:58,442 --> 00:27:01,794 "The man died the next morning, and his maid, 383 00:27:01,837 --> 00:27:07,321 "she threw the contents of the bowl into the fire. 384 00:27:07,364 --> 00:27:08,931 "However, the following day, 385 00:27:08,975 --> 00:27:13,196 "when the maid checked the fireplace... 386 00:27:15,242 --> 00:27:19,986 "...there it was, the host... 387 00:27:22,379 --> 00:27:25,905 ...untouched by the flames." 388 00:27:25,948 --> 00:27:28,037 ♪ ♪ 389 00:27:32,389 --> 00:27:37,612 The priest had this place built to commemorate the miracle. 390 00:27:40,049 --> 00:27:41,442 Which was? 391 00:27:45,141 --> 00:27:47,578 The indestructible host. 392 00:27:47,622 --> 00:27:50,146 Well, it seems a bit... 393 00:27:50,190 --> 00:27:53,672 minor league as miracles go. 394 00:27:53,715 --> 00:27:56,109 You know, a fireproof wafer. 395 00:27:56,152 --> 00:27:57,850 You know as well as I do, Gerry, 396 00:27:57,893 --> 00:27:59,765 that miracles come in all shapes and sizes. 397 00:27:59,808 --> 00:28:04,204 Stella, what happened to you was not miraculous. 398 00:28:04,247 --> 00:28:07,424 Right, it was perfectly within the bounds of possibilit... 399 00:28:15,432 --> 00:28:17,521 ♪ ♪ 400 00:28:21,003 --> 00:28:23,005 [bicycle bells dinging] 401 00:28:27,140 --> 00:28:29,142 [speaking Dutch] 402 00:28:36,976 --> 00:28:38,717 [case pops open] 403 00:28:41,937 --> 00:28:44,679 GERRY: Every time I open my glasses case nowadays, 404 00:28:44,723 --> 00:28:47,508 I'm pleasantly surprised to find my glasses. 405 00:28:48,683 --> 00:28:50,467 Now, that's a miracle. 406 00:29:01,522 --> 00:29:04,220 The model married couple. 407 00:29:04,264 --> 00:29:06,570 I think you can see how much he cherishes her. 408 00:29:14,883 --> 00:29:18,234 Why is she protecting her stomach? 409 00:29:18,278 --> 00:29:20,367 ♪ ♪ 410 00:29:30,116 --> 00:29:32,118 [quiet chatter] 411 00:29:34,424 --> 00:29:36,165 [Stella groans softly] 412 00:29:44,391 --> 00:29:46,436 Everything all right? 413 00:29:46,480 --> 00:29:48,438 Oh, my feet are throbbing. 414 00:29:48,482 --> 00:29:50,049 I've been on my pegs all morning. 415 00:29:50,092 --> 00:29:52,355 Ah. You're not going to chicken out, are you? 416 00:29:52,399 --> 00:29:54,183 No, no. It's a pit stop. 417 00:29:55,794 --> 00:29:57,491 Okay. 418 00:29:57,534 --> 00:30:01,060 Look, I can't not see The Night Watch,so... 419 00:30:01,103 --> 00:30:02,975 -No. -So, um, why don't we meet 420 00:30:03,018 --> 00:30:06,239 in the café in, uh... 421 00:30:06,282 --> 00:30:08,545 -30 minutes for a bit of lunch? -Sure. 422 00:30:08,589 --> 00:30:10,112 Okay? 423 00:30:10,156 --> 00:30:12,071 All right. 424 00:30:12,114 --> 00:30:13,637 See ya. 425 00:30:17,859 --> 00:30:20,253 ♪ ♪ 426 00:30:20,296 --> 00:30:22,298 [quiet chatter] 427 00:30:39,794 --> 00:30:41,274 [Gerry exhales sharply] 428 00:30:41,317 --> 00:30:44,494 That cold, it would cut right through you. 429 00:30:44,538 --> 00:30:47,497 [both sigh] 430 00:30:49,717 --> 00:30:51,980 [Gerry groans] 431 00:30:52,024 --> 00:30:55,462 [both sighing] 432 00:31:02,121 --> 00:31:04,427 [Gerry grunts] 433 00:31:04,471 --> 00:31:06,952 Ah, God. 434 00:31:06,995 --> 00:31:09,345 STELLA: Oh. [chuckles] 435 00:31:09,389 --> 00:31:11,565 GERRY: Oh, yeah. [chuckles] 436 00:31:11,608 --> 00:31:14,568 [both continue sighing] 437 00:31:19,965 --> 00:31:23,185 Would-would you look what these socks have done to me. 438 00:31:23,229 --> 00:31:24,752 Egg timer. 439 00:31:24,795 --> 00:31:26,362 Look. Feel it. 440 00:31:26,406 --> 00:31:28,408 Uh, no, I'm happy to forgo that at the moment. 441 00:31:28,451 --> 00:31:30,410 [Gerry groans] 442 00:31:30,453 --> 00:31:32,760 Oh, God. 443 00:31:32,803 --> 00:31:35,154 [Gerry grunting] 444 00:31:35,197 --> 00:31:36,938 Stop it. 445 00:31:36,982 --> 00:31:40,159 [groans] The only thing that feels better than this is... 446 00:31:40,202 --> 00:31:42,813 -You'll make it worse. -[chuckling] 447 00:31:42,857 --> 00:31:47,993 Oh, I know you shouldn't, but when you give in, Stella... 448 00:31:48,036 --> 00:31:50,082 -when you give in... -You'll draw blood. 449 00:31:50,125 --> 00:31:51,997 -[Gerry grunts] -[Stella sighs] 450 00:31:52,040 --> 00:31:53,737 [sighs] 451 00:31:53,781 --> 00:31:55,914 Oh, that's better. 452 00:31:55,957 --> 00:31:59,352 [breathing heavily] 453 00:32:07,186 --> 00:32:08,361 What? 454 00:32:18,675 --> 00:32:20,547 [Stella chuckles] 455 00:32:23,767 --> 00:32:25,682 [Stella chuckles] 456 00:33:16,342 --> 00:33:17,691 [Gerry grunts] 457 00:33:17,734 --> 00:33:19,127 Help us with this, will you? 458 00:33:19,171 --> 00:33:21,434 [both laughing] 459 00:33:31,139 --> 00:33:32,749 Gerry? 460 00:33:34,229 --> 00:33:35,665 Hmm? 461 00:33:43,717 --> 00:33:46,937 Do you ever think about where you'd like to be buried? 462 00:33:49,201 --> 00:33:51,942 Other than with you, you mean? 463 00:33:54,641 --> 00:33:57,470 At home or in Scotland, I mean. 464 00:34:00,125 --> 00:34:02,214 Is Scotland not home? 465 00:34:10,352 --> 00:34:14,052 What happens when all of this stops? 466 00:34:14,095 --> 00:34:16,793 Then... 467 00:34:16,837 --> 00:34:18,752 there'll be no more. 468 00:34:25,019 --> 00:34:27,500 And what'll be the point then? 469 00:34:41,601 --> 00:34:43,690 ♪ ♪ 470 00:34:48,434 --> 00:34:50,479 -[bell tolling] -[birds chirping] 471 00:34:52,742 --> 00:34:54,788 [quiet chatter] 472 00:35:01,055 --> 00:35:03,666 -[glass clinks] -[drink pouring] 473 00:35:12,762 --> 00:35:14,503 [grunts softly] 474 00:35:26,994 --> 00:35:29,083 [drink pouring] 475 00:35:31,651 --> 00:35:33,696 [water running] 476 00:35:38,701 --> 00:35:41,617 -[loud thud, Stella gasps] -GERRY: Fuck! Jesus! 477 00:35:41,661 --> 00:35:44,577 -Stella! [groans] -Yes, I'm coming, Gerry. 478 00:35:44,620 --> 00:35:46,231 -I slipped. -Oh, come on. 479 00:35:46,274 --> 00:35:48,015 -[grunting] -Come on. 480 00:35:48,058 --> 00:35:50,191 It's all right. It's all right. 481 00:35:50,235 --> 00:35:52,062 God... [laughing] 482 00:35:52,106 --> 00:35:53,803 -Oh, God. -It's no laughing matter. 483 00:35:53,847 --> 00:35:55,675 All right. 484 00:35:55,718 --> 00:35:57,720 Wait a minute. Let's get this on you. 485 00:35:57,764 --> 00:35:59,200 It's all right. It's all right. 486 00:35:59,244 --> 00:36:02,334 [Gerry groaning, panting] 487 00:36:02,377 --> 00:36:04,162 Get your legs over. 488 00:36:06,642 --> 00:36:08,209 All right, come on. One at a time. 489 00:36:08,253 --> 00:36:09,819 [Gerry grunting] 490 00:36:09,863 --> 00:36:11,386 I could've been a goner. 491 00:36:11,430 --> 00:36:14,084 -Oh, shh. You're all right. -[shuts off water] 492 00:36:14,128 --> 00:36:17,087 -There. Oh. -[groans, pants] 493 00:36:17,131 --> 00:36:19,002 -There's no bath mat. -Oh. 494 00:36:19,046 --> 00:36:21,048 [Gerry breathing heavily] 495 00:36:21,091 --> 00:36:22,789 Every bath should have a rubber mat. 496 00:36:22,832 --> 00:36:24,356 I know. I know. 497 00:36:24,399 --> 00:36:26,271 Oh. Oh, you're all right. 498 00:36:26,314 --> 00:36:28,838 Come on, now. Steady. Steady. 499 00:36:28,882 --> 00:36:31,014 -Oh, you're shaking. -[grunts] 500 00:36:31,058 --> 00:36:34,453 -[continues breathing heavily] -Good man. Good man. 501 00:36:34,496 --> 00:36:35,845 Sorry. 502 00:36:35,889 --> 00:36:37,543 I didn't mean to laugh. 503 00:36:37,586 --> 00:36:39,675 ♪ ♪ 504 00:36:56,126 --> 00:36:57,737 -[groans softly] -You all right? 505 00:36:57,780 --> 00:36:59,347 Yeah, yeah. 506 00:37:03,786 --> 00:37:06,963 [cork squeaks, pops] 507 00:37:08,835 --> 00:37:10,315 GERRY: Oh, just pour away. 508 00:37:10,358 --> 00:37:12,404 -SERVER: Sure? -GERRY: I'm sure it's fine. 509 00:37:22,370 --> 00:37:24,894 Ah. 510 00:37:24,938 --> 00:37:26,766 -STELLA and SERVER: Thank you. -GERRY: Thanks. 511 00:37:28,550 --> 00:37:29,856 [Stella clears throat] 512 00:37:29,899 --> 00:37:32,772 Moderation in all things. 513 00:37:34,991 --> 00:37:37,385 -Especially moderation. -Moderation. 514 00:37:42,303 --> 00:37:43,957 Mm. 515 00:37:48,657 --> 00:37:50,006 [Gerry grunts softly] 516 00:37:54,968 --> 00:37:57,449 There's something I'd like to talk to you about. 517 00:38:05,935 --> 00:38:09,939 Gerry, I'm tired of living the way we do. 518 00:38:09,983 --> 00:38:13,029 -[scoffs] -I keep... 519 00:38:13,073 --> 00:38:16,598 I keep f-feeling at a loose end, 520 00:38:16,642 --> 00:38:18,687 you know, at home. 521 00:38:18,731 --> 00:38:21,951 What with Michael gone, and-and it doesn't sound like 522 00:38:21,995 --> 00:38:24,040 there's going to be any more grandchildren. 523 00:38:25,520 --> 00:38:27,479 What's my role? 524 00:38:35,269 --> 00:38:39,186 What if we've cut the cloth of our lives all wrong? 525 00:38:41,797 --> 00:38:44,147 There's too... 526 00:38:44,191 --> 00:38:47,107 great a sense of drift. 527 00:38:50,980 --> 00:38:53,592 And I keep thinking... I... 528 00:38:56,377 --> 00:38:59,119 I keep thinking, Gerry, that I-I... 529 00:39:00,990 --> 00:39:03,036 I want to do something better. 530 00:39:03,079 --> 00:39:04,733 What do you mean, better? 531 00:39:04,777 --> 00:39:06,431 Better in what way? 532 00:39:08,215 --> 00:39:12,088 I want to live a more devout life. 533 00:39:12,132 --> 00:39:14,395 It's an unfashionable word nowadays, I know. 534 00:39:14,439 --> 00:39:16,092 Well, there's nothing wrong with you, is there? 535 00:39:16,136 --> 00:39:18,356 Not in any physical sense, no. 536 00:39:18,399 --> 00:39:20,358 No, no, yes, but hang on a minute, Stella. 537 00:39:20,401 --> 00:39:22,490 -Just hang on. No, it... -No, no, no, there's nothing 538 00:39:22,534 --> 00:39:23,622 wrong with me. 539 00:39:23,665 --> 00:39:26,015 Gerry, calm yourself. No. 540 00:39:27,016 --> 00:39:28,366 [Stella sighs] 541 00:39:28,409 --> 00:39:32,848 But I'd like to make an appointment. 542 00:39:32,892 --> 00:39:35,285 You know, the place we... we visited this morning. 543 00:39:35,329 --> 00:39:37,287 Just to speak to someone. 544 00:39:37,331 --> 00:39:40,769 I mean, the talk was that it's a good place 545 00:39:40,813 --> 00:39:44,643 for women like me who want to live a more religious life. 546 00:39:44,686 --> 00:39:48,560 A-A community of like-minded women 547 00:39:48,603 --> 00:39:51,998 interested in-in exploring the big questions. 548 00:39:52,041 --> 00:39:54,348 And there's somebody in there with all the answers, is there? 549 00:40:00,398 --> 00:40:02,312 These are questions that you have to answer 550 00:40:02,356 --> 00:40:04,140 for yourself, Gerry. 551 00:40:07,013 --> 00:40:09,363 [Gerry scoffs, chuckles] 552 00:40:09,407 --> 00:40:12,105 We should order. I'm famished. 553 00:40:21,854 --> 00:40:23,856 [faucet running] 554 00:40:25,597 --> 00:40:27,294 [faucet stops] 555 00:40:40,742 --> 00:40:42,788 [Gerry continues brushing teeth] 556 00:40:48,228 --> 00:40:50,404 -[brushing stops] -[faucet running] 557 00:40:53,102 --> 00:40:54,669 [Gerry grunts softly] 558 00:41:00,893 --> 00:41:02,895 -[Gerry grunts] -[faucet stops] 559 00:41:09,510 --> 00:41:11,556 Did you take your statins? 560 00:41:11,599 --> 00:41:12,818 Yeah. 561 00:41:18,911 --> 00:41:21,957 [both sighing] 562 00:41:40,585 --> 00:41:43,588 [Gerry sighs, grunts] 563 00:41:51,813 --> 00:41:53,772 [birds squawking] 564 00:41:53,815 --> 00:41:55,817 ♪ ♪ 565 00:42:13,661 --> 00:42:15,663 ♪ ♪ 566 00:42:24,150 --> 00:42:26,021 [Gerry sighs softly] 567 00:42:26,065 --> 00:42:28,067 [quiet chatter] 568 00:42:40,732 --> 00:42:42,168 Thank you. 569 00:42:53,179 --> 00:42:54,615 [Gerry clears throat] 570 00:42:59,751 --> 00:43:01,927 Uh, are you, um... 571 00:43:03,885 --> 00:43:06,279 ...any... 572 00:43:06,322 --> 00:43:10,762 easier in your mind about yesterday? 573 00:43:20,641 --> 00:43:24,906 See, I'm trying to remember what was said. 574 00:43:35,264 --> 00:43:37,919 Unlucky with the weather, haven't we? 575 00:43:48,538 --> 00:43:50,845 -Stella. -Let's eat. We should eat. 576 00:43:55,154 --> 00:43:57,199 [bells chiming] 577 00:44:03,075 --> 00:44:04,729 [bicycle bell dings] 578 00:44:06,687 --> 00:44:08,080 [Gerry grunts softly] 579 00:44:09,385 --> 00:44:11,344 [bicycle bell dinging] 580 00:44:21,963 --> 00:44:24,009 Oh, she's thought of everything. 581 00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:30,885 [quiet chatter] 582 00:44:33,453 --> 00:44:35,542 ♪ ♪ 583 00:44:57,564 --> 00:44:59,653 ♪ ♪ 584 00:45:22,632 --> 00:45:24,722 ♪ ♪ 585 00:45:42,348 --> 00:45:44,393 ♪ ♪ 586 00:46:04,370 --> 00:46:06,415 ♪ ♪ 587 00:46:25,783 --> 00:46:27,828 ♪ ♪ 588 00:46:50,198 --> 00:46:52,244 ♪ ♪ 589 00:46:55,856 --> 00:46:58,554 [espresso machine steam wand hissing] 590 00:47:00,643 --> 00:47:02,384 What is it, love? 591 00:47:05,300 --> 00:47:07,346 Do you remember Schindler's List? 592 00:47:08,390 --> 00:47:10,697 At the end? 593 00:47:10,740 --> 00:47:14,222 The pebbles on the gravestones, the little tokens? 594 00:47:14,266 --> 00:47:17,965 I noticed something similar at the end, on the wee shelf. 595 00:47:21,055 --> 00:47:24,319 I used to do that book with so many classes in school. 596 00:47:24,363 --> 00:47:26,887 And so I thought... [chuckling] 597 00:47:29,237 --> 00:47:31,544 I thought, "Why don't I leave something?" 598 00:47:32,632 --> 00:47:33,894 Yeah, and what's wrong with that? 599 00:47:33,938 --> 00:47:35,243 Oh, it's stupid. 600 00:47:35,287 --> 00:47:37,158 -Says who? -I've no right. 601 00:47:37,202 --> 00:47:40,074 Why? It's a perfectly legitimate gesture. 602 00:47:40,118 --> 00:47:41,902 No, it's shameful is what it is. 603 00:47:41,946 --> 00:47:44,426 -I'm not even Jewish. -Ah, come on, Stella. 604 00:47:44,470 --> 00:47:47,342 Don't take things so seriously. 605 00:47:47,386 --> 00:47:49,605 Gerry, if you can't take the Holocaust seriously... 606 00:47:49,649 --> 00:47:51,216 You know what I mean, right? 607 00:47:51,259 --> 00:47:53,653 You felt something, right? You took action. 608 00:47:53,696 --> 00:47:56,438 -You did a thoughtful thing. -No. No. 609 00:47:56,482 --> 00:47:59,920 I did a selfish thing to make myself feel better. 610 00:47:59,964 --> 00:48:01,835 There's a difference. 611 00:48:03,489 --> 00:48:07,493 Why is anything spiritual so impossible for you to grasp? 612 00:48:12,019 --> 00:48:13,760 Cake? 613 00:48:15,501 --> 00:48:16,981 Cake? 614 00:48:24,336 --> 00:48:26,033 [sighs] 615 00:48:27,339 --> 00:48:29,341 ♪ ♪ 616 00:48:29,384 --> 00:48:31,386 [birds chirping] 617 00:48:43,746 --> 00:48:45,835 [breathing deeply] 618 00:49:04,550 --> 00:49:05,855 BARMAN AIDAN: How you doing? 619 00:49:05,899 --> 00:49:07,596 GERRY: Pint of stout. Thanks. 620 00:49:07,640 --> 00:49:09,424 And a... 621 00:49:09,468 --> 00:49:12,036 ["Sideways to the Sun" by Horslips playing quietly] 622 00:49:12,079 --> 00:49:14,342 ...large whiskey, no ice. 623 00:49:18,738 --> 00:49:20,522 [drink pouring] 624 00:49:27,790 --> 00:49:30,445 [breathing deeply] 625 00:49:38,018 --> 00:49:40,847 Are you, uh, from Derry? 626 00:49:40,890 --> 00:49:42,762 -Donegal? -Derry. 627 00:49:42,805 --> 00:49:45,112 GERRY: Ah. I studied there for a while. 628 00:49:45,156 --> 00:49:46,766 -Magee College. -Oh, yeah? 629 00:49:46,809 --> 00:49:49,421 Yeah. A bit before your time, obviously. 630 00:49:49,464 --> 00:49:50,813 Don't tell me. 631 00:49:50,857 --> 00:49:52,815 Accountant? 632 00:49:52,859 --> 00:49:55,035 Architect. 633 00:49:55,079 --> 00:49:56,341 Same again? 634 00:49:56,384 --> 00:49:58,299 ♪ To play old airs ♪ 635 00:49:58,343 --> 00:50:01,259 ♪ We said we could be friends... ♪ 636 00:50:01,302 --> 00:50:04,697 GERRY: Graduated in the mid-'70s, 637 00:50:04,740 --> 00:50:07,917 and then as luck would have it, Liam McCormick took me on. 638 00:50:10,485 --> 00:50:13,706 He was a big architect in Belfast back then. 639 00:50:15,447 --> 00:50:21,061 And then they burnt the entire bloody place to the ground. 640 00:50:21,105 --> 00:50:22,889 Petrol bomb. 641 00:50:22,932 --> 00:50:25,022 No one was killed, thank God. 642 00:50:26,414 --> 00:50:30,114 Aye, but all that work, though, you know? 643 00:50:30,157 --> 00:50:33,465 Years and years of hard work up in smoke. 644 00:50:33,508 --> 00:50:36,120 Ireland's fight for fucking freedom. 645 00:50:36,163 --> 00:50:38,948 It wasn't long after that that we left. 646 00:50:38,992 --> 00:50:40,472 To? 647 00:50:40,515 --> 00:50:42,343 [sucks teeth] Glasgow. 648 00:50:42,387 --> 00:50:43,518 Miss it much? 649 00:50:44,911 --> 00:50:46,086 Work? 650 00:50:46,130 --> 00:50:47,783 Home. 651 00:50:49,785 --> 00:50:52,005 ♪ ♪ 652 00:50:52,049 --> 00:50:54,355 You know, um... 653 00:50:54,399 --> 00:50:59,186 we used to have these scale models. 654 00:51:02,755 --> 00:51:05,932 There was, uh, cars the size of Dinky Toys. 655 00:51:05,975 --> 00:51:10,458 Trees as small as those little cotton buds. 656 00:51:10,502 --> 00:51:12,199 You know? 657 00:51:12,243 --> 00:51:14,245 Tiny figurines. 658 00:51:14,288 --> 00:51:18,988 Mini churches, libraries, streets. 659 00:51:19,032 --> 00:51:21,556 Windows were made out of cellophane. 660 00:51:22,644 --> 00:51:24,516 They were minuscule. 661 00:51:33,742 --> 00:51:36,615 They were dis-architects, those fellas. 662 00:51:39,226 --> 00:51:43,448 The end of human decency, in the name of religion. 663 00:51:48,017 --> 00:51:49,454 I can still smell it. 664 00:51:51,630 --> 00:51:53,327 The black char. 665 00:51:58,898 --> 00:52:00,769 [drink pouring from tap] 666 00:52:05,383 --> 00:52:09,343 Yes, they certainly leveled my career, anyway. 667 00:52:10,866 --> 00:52:13,434 Strictly third division after that. 668 00:52:13,478 --> 00:52:15,697 ["The Old Rustic Bridge" by Big Tom and the Mainliners playing] 669 00:52:15,741 --> 00:52:18,309 -That was on a good day. -Hmm. 670 00:52:20,441 --> 00:52:24,358 Ah, would you look at the dome on that. 671 00:52:25,664 --> 00:52:27,013 [chuckles] 672 00:52:27,056 --> 00:52:30,103 Norman Foster, eat your heart out. 673 00:52:30,147 --> 00:52:31,844 [chuckles] 674 00:52:36,196 --> 00:52:39,112 ♪ Though now far away ♪ 675 00:52:39,156 --> 00:52:43,421 ♪ Still my thoughts fondly stray ♪ 676 00:52:43,464 --> 00:52:47,729 ♪ To the old rustic bridge by the mill... ♪ 677 00:52:47,773 --> 00:52:50,558 Taste... 678 00:52:50,602 --> 00:52:52,778 texture, temperature, perfect. 679 00:52:52,821 --> 00:52:54,475 [chuckles softly] 680 00:52:57,522 --> 00:53:00,133 Some people say the black stuff transforms you, 681 00:53:00,177 --> 00:53:01,961 you know, brings out the worst in you. 682 00:53:02,004 --> 00:53:03,484 Not me. 683 00:53:04,616 --> 00:53:07,184 -I love people. -[chuckles softly] 684 00:53:07,227 --> 00:53:09,403 I've always loved people. I'm a people person. 685 00:53:09,447 --> 00:53:11,536 [both chuckling] 686 00:53:14,365 --> 00:53:17,063 [lively chatter and laughter outside] 687 00:53:35,908 --> 00:53:37,997 ♪ ♪ 688 00:53:54,013 --> 00:53:55,362 Stella. 689 00:53:55,406 --> 00:53:57,625 Do you know what I'd like to do tonight? 690 00:53:57,669 --> 00:53:59,105 What? 691 00:53:59,148 --> 00:54:00,846 Something fun. 692 00:54:02,500 --> 00:54:04,632 [lively chatter] 693 00:54:04,676 --> 00:54:07,418 GERRY: The railwaymen would leave their burning lanterns 694 00:54:07,461 --> 00:54:09,289 outside the bordello doors. 695 00:54:09,333 --> 00:54:11,248 Red lanterns. 696 00:54:11,291 --> 00:54:13,728 -Red-light district. -STELLA: Charming. 697 00:54:15,426 --> 00:54:16,949 Oh. 698 00:54:19,995 --> 00:54:22,563 I hesitate to say what turns me on, 699 00:54:22,607 --> 00:54:24,826 but this certainly isn't it. 700 00:54:24,870 --> 00:54:27,438 I just feel so sorry for them. 701 00:54:27,481 --> 00:54:28,830 Aye. 702 00:54:28,874 --> 00:54:30,397 The lighting is awful. 703 00:54:30,441 --> 00:54:31,485 [chuckles] I know. 704 00:54:31,529 --> 00:54:33,357 That's UV lighting. 705 00:54:33,400 --> 00:54:36,055 The same thing the butchers used to use to kill the flies. 706 00:54:36,098 --> 00:54:37,230 [both laughing] 707 00:54:37,274 --> 00:54:38,579 I know. 708 00:54:38,623 --> 00:54:41,103 ["Uit M'n Bol" by André Hazes playing] 709 00:54:41,147 --> 00:54:43,932 [song continues with singing in Dutch] 710 00:54:48,459 --> 00:54:50,765 GERRY: An ant could piss more. 711 00:54:50,809 --> 00:54:53,725 Before you English had gin, we had gin. 712 00:54:53,768 --> 00:54:54,987 I'm not English. 713 00:54:55,030 --> 00:54:56,771 With a beer, it's very good. 714 00:54:58,991 --> 00:55:01,036 [conversation continues indistinctly] 715 00:55:09,828 --> 00:55:11,699 Here we go. 716 00:55:11,743 --> 00:55:13,397 -There. -Oh. 717 00:55:13,440 --> 00:55:14,528 What are we drinking? 718 00:55:14,572 --> 00:55:15,834 -Jenever. -What? 719 00:55:15,877 --> 00:55:17,401 Gin. 720 00:55:17,444 --> 00:55:20,142 First you drink the beer, then you drink the, uh... 721 00:55:20,186 --> 00:55:21,492 -Gin? -Gin. 722 00:55:21,535 --> 00:55:23,232 -Ha. -Cheers. 723 00:55:23,276 --> 00:55:24,625 Cheers. 724 00:55:36,376 --> 00:55:37,769 Ah. 725 00:55:40,554 --> 00:55:42,426 -[sets glass down] -[Stella exhales] 726 00:55:42,469 --> 00:55:45,124 [laughing]: Holy Mary, Mother of God. 727 00:55:45,167 --> 00:55:47,126 [both laughing] 728 00:55:53,219 --> 00:55:55,047 Same again? 729 00:55:56,178 --> 00:55:58,006 [Stella laughing] 730 00:56:08,365 --> 00:56:10,845 What bliss to be away from all that noise. 731 00:56:10,889 --> 00:56:12,064 Aye. 732 00:56:12,107 --> 00:56:14,327 [Stella laughing] 733 00:56:14,371 --> 00:56:17,156 [bell tolling] 734 00:56:17,199 --> 00:56:18,984 -[gasps] Gerry. -Huh? 735 00:56:20,899 --> 00:56:22,640 STELLA: Look. 736 00:56:28,167 --> 00:56:29,951 Come on. 737 00:56:29,995 --> 00:56:31,953 [horse huffing softly] 738 00:56:31,997 --> 00:56:34,042 ♪ ♪ 739 00:56:50,102 --> 00:56:52,234 [horse huffing softly] 740 00:56:56,151 --> 00:56:58,197 Oh, you're beautiful. 741 00:57:05,030 --> 00:57:07,336 ♪ ♪ 742 00:57:20,698 --> 00:57:22,743 ♪ ♪ 743 00:57:37,932 --> 00:57:39,151 [Stella chuckles] 744 00:57:39,194 --> 00:57:41,109 -[bells chiming] -[birds squawking] 745 00:57:47,028 --> 00:57:49,074 [rustling in other room] 746 00:58:06,221 --> 00:58:08,267 -[Gerry sighs] -Morning. 747 00:58:12,227 --> 00:58:14,578 What's that for? 748 00:58:14,621 --> 00:58:16,971 Body. 749 00:58:17,015 --> 00:58:18,886 Think it would do anything for my body? 750 00:58:18,930 --> 00:58:21,062 [Stella grunts softly] 751 00:58:21,106 --> 00:58:22,760 What's the occasion? 752 00:58:22,803 --> 00:58:25,502 Oh, thought I'd go back to the Begijnhof again. 753 00:58:25,545 --> 00:58:27,591 The vomiting miracle place? 754 00:58:29,506 --> 00:58:32,378 Uh, d-do you want me to go with you? 755 00:58:33,901 --> 00:58:35,642 No, thank you. Mm. 756 00:58:38,863 --> 00:58:40,908 ♪ ♪ 757 00:58:58,447 --> 00:58:59,840 STELLA: Oh. 758 00:59:00,885 --> 00:59:02,669 [clears throat] 759 00:59:02,713 --> 00:59:04,323 Good morning. 760 00:59:04,366 --> 00:59:06,151 I wonder if you could help me. 761 00:59:06,194 --> 00:59:08,980 [Hennie speaking Dutch] 762 00:59:09,023 --> 00:59:10,242 Oh. 763 00:59:10,285 --> 00:59:12,026 Thank you. [clears throat] 764 00:59:12,070 --> 00:59:14,551 [typing] 765 00:59:17,902 --> 00:59:19,904 [quiet chatter] 766 00:59:30,915 --> 00:59:33,004 [breathing deeply] 767 00:59:37,574 --> 00:59:39,271 Excuse me. 768 00:59:39,314 --> 00:59:42,317 Excuse me. Uh, uh, I have a plane to catch. 769 00:59:42,361 --> 00:59:43,580 -A flight. -Please sit. 770 00:59:43,623 --> 00:59:45,233 No, no. [stammers] 771 00:59:45,277 --> 00:59:47,409 -Is there anyone else that I... -Hello again. 772 00:59:47,453 --> 00:59:49,411 -Oh, hello. -[both chuckling] 773 00:59:49,455 --> 00:59:52,371 -Um... Sorry, just... -Oh, sorry. No, no, no. 774 00:59:52,414 --> 00:59:54,808 [Kathy and Hennie conversing in Dutch] 775 01:00:00,031 --> 01:00:02,033 -Hi. Um... -Hi. 776 01:00:02,076 --> 01:00:05,950 I'm sorry. Hennie is very busy right now. 777 01:00:05,993 --> 01:00:08,822 But maybe I can help you with something? 778 01:00:10,171 --> 01:00:11,695 That would be lovely, yeah. 779 01:00:13,174 --> 01:00:14,872 My house is just down there. 780 01:00:14,915 --> 01:00:16,525 Right. 781 01:00:16,569 --> 01:00:17,875 [sighs] 782 01:00:19,267 --> 01:00:21,356 The gardens are so beautifully kept. 783 01:00:21,400 --> 01:00:22,880 KATHY [chuckling]: Yeah. 784 01:00:22,923 --> 01:00:24,751 In the summer, they're extraordinary. 785 01:00:24,795 --> 01:00:28,189 Especially in the evenings, with the night-scented stock. 786 01:00:28,233 --> 01:00:30,322 Oh. 787 01:00:30,365 --> 01:00:31,976 It's so quiet. 788 01:00:32,019 --> 01:00:34,456 KATHY: It's a meter lower than the outside world. 789 01:00:34,500 --> 01:00:36,894 The noise goes over its head somehow. 790 01:00:38,896 --> 01:00:40,201 This is me here. 791 01:00:40,245 --> 01:00:41,638 Oh. 792 01:00:44,641 --> 01:00:46,207 [Stella chuckles] 793 01:00:48,166 --> 01:00:50,516 [lock clicking] 794 01:00:51,952 --> 01:00:53,911 [traffic light clicking rapidly] 795 01:00:53,954 --> 01:00:56,000 ♪ ♪ 796 01:01:00,091 --> 01:01:02,833 Stairway to heaven. 797 01:01:02,876 --> 01:01:05,705 The only disadvantage is when you want a grand piano. 798 01:01:05,749 --> 01:01:08,142 Maybe stick to the violin. 799 01:01:08,186 --> 01:01:10,362 [Kathy chuckling] 800 01:01:10,405 --> 01:01:12,756 Oh, it's lovely. 801 01:01:14,061 --> 01:01:15,759 Minimalist. 802 01:01:15,802 --> 01:01:17,456 Sit yourself down. I'll make us some tea. 803 01:01:17,499 --> 01:01:19,153 Thank you. 804 01:01:35,909 --> 01:01:38,912 ["Something in the Air" by Thunderclap Newman playing] 805 01:01:43,569 --> 01:01:47,878 ♪ Lock up the streets and houses ♪ 806 01:01:47,921 --> 01:01:53,100 ♪ Because there's something in the air ♪ 807 01:01:53,144 --> 01:01:58,453 ♪ We've got to get together sooner or later ♪ 808 01:01:58,497 --> 01:02:02,806 ♪ Because the revolution's here ♪ 809 01:02:02,849 --> 01:02:05,896 ♪ And you know it's right ♪ 810 01:02:10,901 --> 01:02:14,078 ♪ And you know that it's right... ♪ 811 01:02:14,121 --> 01:02:15,906 KATHY: So, what can I do for you, Stella? 812 01:02:15,949 --> 01:02:17,777 STELLA: Well, um... 813 01:02:17,821 --> 01:02:19,605 Oh, do you need sugar? 814 01:02:19,648 --> 01:02:22,564 -Uh, no, thank you. -Oh. 815 01:02:22,608 --> 01:02:24,784 I suppose I just wanted to make an inquiry. 816 01:02:24,828 --> 01:02:28,875 I was in Amsterdam some 30-odd years ago. 817 01:02:28,919 --> 01:02:29,963 KATHY: Mm-hmm? 818 01:02:30,007 --> 01:02:31,965 Teacher training conference. 819 01:02:32,009 --> 01:02:33,184 Are you a teacher, Stella? 820 01:02:33,227 --> 01:02:34,402 -I was. -Me, too. 821 01:02:34,446 --> 01:02:36,274 Oh. [laughs] 822 01:02:36,317 --> 01:02:39,190 For years, I was an Irishwoman living in Scotland 823 01:02:39,233 --> 01:02:40,974 teaching English. 824 01:02:41,018 --> 01:02:42,584 An Irishwoman in the Netherlands 825 01:02:42,628 --> 01:02:44,630 teaching comparative religion and maths. 826 01:02:44,673 --> 01:02:47,546 [chuckling]: Oh. Right. 827 01:02:47,589 --> 01:02:50,114 Well, that was when I first heard about it. 828 01:02:50,157 --> 01:02:52,333 You know, the setup here. 829 01:02:52,377 --> 01:02:53,465 Ah... 830 01:02:54,771 --> 01:03:00,298 But back then, uh, there was no urgency. 831 01:03:00,341 --> 01:03:01,952 What's the urgency now? 832 01:03:06,783 --> 01:03:10,438 I want to live a more valuable life, Kathy. 833 01:03:12,092 --> 01:03:14,660 To make a contribution. 834 01:03:14,703 --> 01:03:16,923 However small. 835 01:03:16,967 --> 01:03:19,839 You know, so... 836 01:03:19,883 --> 01:03:22,450 I suppose, really, 837 01:03:22,494 --> 01:03:27,455 I just wanted to find out about the life here, you know. 838 01:03:27,499 --> 01:03:31,459 How someone like me might go about applying 839 01:03:31,503 --> 01:03:33,070 to become part of this. 840 01:03:33,113 --> 01:03:34,680 This? 841 01:03:34,723 --> 01:03:37,074 The order. 842 01:03:37,117 --> 01:03:38,466 The sisterhood. 843 01:03:39,990 --> 01:03:42,209 [sighs] Stella, I don't know where you've been getting 844 01:03:42,253 --> 01:03:45,299 your information from, but... 845 01:03:45,343 --> 01:03:47,998 there's no religious order now. 846 01:03:48,041 --> 01:03:49,913 Not anymore. 847 01:03:49,956 --> 01:03:52,611 There hasn't been a sister living here since 1971. 848 01:03:52,654 --> 01:03:54,221 [stammers softly] 849 01:03:54,265 --> 01:03:55,744 What is there? 850 01:03:55,788 --> 01:03:58,530 Affordable living for anyone who can afford it. 851 01:04:02,012 --> 01:04:04,318 [stammers softly] 852 01:04:04,362 --> 01:04:07,582 So the sisterhood is a figment of my imagination? 853 01:04:07,626 --> 01:04:10,368 No. The sisterhood is real. 854 01:04:11,456 --> 01:04:14,546 But the religious aspect... 855 01:04:14,589 --> 01:04:17,984 the religious aspect has all but disappeared. 856 01:04:19,594 --> 01:04:21,770 So I've got this all wrong. 857 01:04:23,076 --> 01:04:26,950 It's possible still for women to live here. 858 01:04:26,993 --> 01:04:28,952 The only criteria is that you must be prepared 859 01:04:28,995 --> 01:04:31,432 to live by yourself. 860 01:04:31,476 --> 01:04:34,783 Older than 30, younger than 65. 861 01:04:35,959 --> 01:04:37,699 That rules me out, then. 862 01:04:37,743 --> 01:04:39,701 Oh, no. 863 01:04:39,745 --> 01:04:41,268 I don't believe it. 864 01:04:43,009 --> 01:04:46,360 The other hitch is that I'm married. 865 01:04:46,404 --> 01:04:48,275 [sighs] 866 01:04:48,319 --> 01:04:53,019 Though I'm not sure how much marriage we've got left in us. 867 01:04:55,674 --> 01:04:57,719 ["Something in the Air" continues] 868 01:05:12,473 --> 01:05:14,606 ♪ Lock up the streets... ♪ 869 01:05:14,649 --> 01:05:16,564 Can I ask you... 870 01:05:19,089 --> 01:05:20,786 Are-are you... 871 01:05:23,658 --> 01:05:25,530 A Catholic? 872 01:05:27,053 --> 01:05:28,968 Right. 873 01:05:29,012 --> 01:05:30,578 Do you still practice? 874 01:05:30,622 --> 01:05:34,495 You know, prayer and so forth? 875 01:05:34,539 --> 01:05:36,236 [chuckles softly] 876 01:05:46,768 --> 01:05:49,989 Kathy, I... I want to tell you something. 877 01:05:52,252 --> 01:05:55,255 [chuckling]: It-it's something I've never really told anyone. 878 01:06:01,218 --> 01:06:04,525 I was involved in an accident. 879 01:06:04,569 --> 01:06:06,527 This was years ago. 880 01:06:08,573 --> 01:06:14,231 It was our first summer together as husband and wife. 881 01:06:15,797 --> 01:06:17,060 I was pregnant. 882 01:06:17,103 --> 01:06:20,498 I mean, very, very, heavily pregnant. 883 01:06:22,848 --> 01:06:25,198 It was unseasonably hot. 884 01:06:26,808 --> 01:06:29,507 Uh, too hot for tights, anyway. [chuckles] 885 01:06:33,990 --> 01:06:37,776 Somebody was ambushing somebody else. 886 01:06:40,126 --> 01:06:44,174 I'm not sure how long I'd been running for, 887 01:06:44,217 --> 01:06:47,394 but all of a sudden, running became falling, 888 01:06:47,438 --> 01:06:50,702 and falling became... 889 01:06:50,745 --> 01:06:52,530 not moving. 890 01:06:54,184 --> 01:06:56,012 Sprawled. 891 01:07:00,146 --> 01:07:02,322 At first, 892 01:07:02,366 --> 01:07:05,717 I worried that I'd wet myself. 893 01:07:07,458 --> 01:07:10,983 And then I-I thought, you know, it-it must be my-my waters. 894 01:07:11,027 --> 01:07:12,941 You know, my waters must have broken. 895 01:07:12,985 --> 01:07:15,422 -KATHY: Mm-hmm. -[Stella sniffles] 896 01:07:15,466 --> 01:07:18,251 But then, of course, I realized. 897 01:07:23,604 --> 01:07:25,519 So I said a prayer. 898 01:07:27,826 --> 01:07:31,047 As I lay there on the street not-not-not knowing 899 01:07:31,090 --> 01:07:33,788 one way or the other what was going to happen. 900 01:07:36,748 --> 01:07:39,751 [crying]: I said the only prayer I could remember. 901 01:07:42,406 --> 01:07:45,322 As an act of contrition, and I-I knew that wasn't right. 902 01:07:45,365 --> 01:07:47,454 I knew that wasn't what I wanted. 903 01:07:47,498 --> 01:07:49,108 I mean, that's to save yourself. 904 01:07:49,152 --> 01:07:52,590 I knew that, and I wanted to save my baby. 905 01:07:54,505 --> 01:07:56,333 So I said... 906 01:08:01,294 --> 01:08:04,819 I said, "Lord... 907 01:08:04,863 --> 01:08:08,345 "spare the child inside my womb... 908 01:08:10,956 --> 01:08:15,091 ...and I will devote the rest of my life to you." 909 01:08:18,485 --> 01:08:21,706 "Lord, let my baby live, 910 01:08:21,749 --> 01:08:26,319 "and I will devote the rest of my life... 911 01:08:28,539 --> 01:08:30,193 ...to you." 912 01:08:38,766 --> 01:08:40,420 Now... 913 01:08:44,250 --> 01:08:46,600 ...either it was a miracle 914 01:08:46,644 --> 01:08:50,778 or, as Gerry would say, the wee one must have ducked, 915 01:08:50,822 --> 01:08:53,172 but the bullet passed right through me, 916 01:08:53,216 --> 01:08:55,435 in one side and out the other. 917 01:08:57,002 --> 01:08:58,786 The only damage was that 918 01:08:58,830 --> 01:09:01,311 I wouldn't be able to have any more children. 919 01:09:07,360 --> 01:09:10,929 But that vow... 920 01:09:10,972 --> 01:09:12,974 that pledge... 921 01:09:13,018 --> 01:09:15,542 Kathy, that bargain... 922 01:09:17,588 --> 01:09:19,981 ...there is a debt to be paid, 923 01:09:20,025 --> 01:09:24,247 and I've been looking for a way to pay it ever since. 924 01:09:30,078 --> 01:09:32,646 I've never breathed a word of this to-to anyone, 925 01:09:32,690 --> 01:09:34,300 not even to Gerry. 926 01:09:40,567 --> 01:09:43,004 [sobbing]: But here I am... 927 01:09:44,615 --> 01:09:46,660 ...at my age, and... 928 01:09:52,057 --> 01:09:53,972 ...and I've failed. 929 01:09:58,672 --> 01:10:00,544 I'm a failure. 930 01:10:00,587 --> 01:10:02,807 [shuddering breaths] 931 01:10:04,504 --> 01:10:06,593 ["The 7 Last Words of Jesus Christ Sonata IV. Largo" plays] 932 01:10:25,046 --> 01:10:27,135 ♪ ♪ 933 01:10:46,590 --> 01:10:48,331 ♪ ♪ 934 01:11:08,394 --> 01:11:10,440 ♪ ♪ 935 01:11:13,878 --> 01:11:15,619 ♪ ♪ 936 01:11:20,928 --> 01:11:23,017 ♪ ♪ 937 01:11:26,325 --> 01:11:28,371 ♪ ♪ 938 01:11:41,775 --> 01:11:43,995 [breath trembling softly] 939 01:11:49,522 --> 01:11:51,524 [door opens] 940 01:11:51,568 --> 01:11:53,526 -[vehicle engine idling] -[vehicle door opens, closes] 941 01:11:53,570 --> 01:11:55,049 [hotel door closing] 942 01:11:55,093 --> 01:11:57,182 ♪ ♪ 943 01:12:13,851 --> 01:12:16,157 -[waves crashing] -[birds squawking] 944 01:12:28,344 --> 01:12:30,389 -[waves crashing] -[birds squawking] 945 01:12:33,305 --> 01:12:34,959 [camera shutter clicks] 946 01:12:52,672 --> 01:12:54,718 ♪ ♪ 947 01:12:58,112 --> 01:12:59,679 [music ends] 948 01:12:59,723 --> 01:13:02,552 You still haven't told me how your meeting went. 949 01:13:03,596 --> 01:13:05,555 No, I don't suppose I have. 950 01:13:05,598 --> 01:13:07,383 WOMAN [over P.A.]: ...are ready for you to proceed 951 01:13:07,426 --> 01:13:09,515 to departure gate number 42. 952 01:13:18,481 --> 01:13:21,048 [electronic chiming over P.A.] 953 01:13:21,092 --> 01:13:22,833 MAN [over P.A.]: If you see any unattended luggage 954 01:13:22,876 --> 01:13:24,661 or anything suspicious, please contact 955 01:13:24,704 --> 01:13:26,619 a member of staff immediately. 956 01:13:26,663 --> 01:13:28,055 [announcement continues in Dutch] 957 01:13:28,099 --> 01:13:30,580 [rummaging] 958 01:13:30,623 --> 01:13:32,146 [twists cap off bottle] 959 01:13:40,677 --> 01:13:42,679 [twists cap on bottle] 960 01:13:45,943 --> 01:13:47,423 [grunts softly] 961 01:14:00,479 --> 01:14:02,438 You'll do yourself damage. 962 01:14:04,048 --> 01:14:05,397 As if you would care. 963 01:14:08,748 --> 01:14:11,882 -Pardon? -You heard me. 964 01:14:11,925 --> 01:14:14,275 Oh, Jesus, give me peace. 965 01:14:22,283 --> 01:14:24,372 ♪ ♪ 966 01:14:34,644 --> 01:14:36,646 [electronic chiming over P.A.] 967 01:14:36,689 --> 01:14:38,691 [indistinct announcement over P.A.] 968 01:14:53,576 --> 01:14:55,882 -Oh, for God's sake. -Oh. 969 01:15:06,197 --> 01:15:08,155 ♪ ♪ 970 01:15:08,199 --> 01:15:10,288 [quiet chatter] 971 01:15:28,436 --> 01:15:29,873 Here. 972 01:15:41,798 --> 01:15:43,843 [Gerry grunts] 973 01:15:43,887 --> 01:15:45,497 [sighs] 974 01:15:56,552 --> 01:15:58,554 Gerry, when we get home... 975 01:16:02,079 --> 01:16:04,342 I'd like to put the flat up for sale, and... 976 01:16:04,385 --> 01:16:06,823 and then I want to get a place of my own. 977 01:16:18,269 --> 01:16:20,663 You'd be better off waiting till summer. 978 01:16:22,229 --> 01:16:24,884 More chance of getting a better price. 979 01:16:24,928 --> 01:16:27,278 Gerry, you're not listening to me. 980 01:16:31,412 --> 01:16:35,591 I can't go on living the way we do. 981 01:16:38,289 --> 01:16:39,464 I won't. 982 01:16:39,507 --> 01:16:42,598 [takes deep breath] 983 01:16:44,904 --> 01:16:46,776 I mean, the drinking. 984 01:16:48,691 --> 01:16:50,649 If I mention it, I'm a nag. 985 01:16:50,693 --> 01:16:53,347 If I don't, then I'm complicit. 986 01:16:55,872 --> 01:16:58,048 Do you not think I don't see it? 987 01:16:59,745 --> 01:17:01,051 Smell it? 988 01:17:04,315 --> 01:17:06,883 Yes, I suppose you could go on doing it behind my back 989 01:17:06,926 --> 01:17:08,798 until you've no liver left. 990 01:17:08,841 --> 01:17:10,626 [Gerry clears throat softly] 991 01:17:11,931 --> 01:17:14,586 But it's not just the drinking. 992 01:17:14,630 --> 01:17:18,068 It-it's the deception that goes along with it. 993 01:17:20,070 --> 01:17:21,680 It's ruining you. 994 01:17:25,205 --> 01:17:26,685 Says you. 995 01:17:27,860 --> 01:17:31,081 Well, it's ruining me, that's for sure. 996 01:17:32,125 --> 01:17:35,563 I wouldn't know about that. 997 01:17:37,914 --> 01:17:40,481 You used to be so considerate. 998 01:17:43,354 --> 01:17:45,095 What's happened to you? 999 01:17:46,487 --> 01:17:49,403 These days, you're... you're nothing but appetite. 1000 01:17:49,447 --> 01:17:51,449 Okay. Fine, then. I'll stop, okay? 1001 01:17:51,492 --> 01:17:53,190 -Right? No, I will. I'll quit. -[sighs] 1002 01:17:53,233 --> 01:17:55,105 -Oh, Gerry. -No, look, I mean it. 1003 01:17:55,148 --> 01:17:57,847 [stammering]: If you're serious about this, then I am, too. 1004 01:17:57,890 --> 01:17:59,936 -I've heard it all before. -[stammering]: No, look. 1005 01:17:59,979 --> 01:18:01,459 I-I can do it, okay? 1006 01:18:01,502 --> 01:18:04,331 I... We can... I... [sighs] I can change. 1007 01:18:06,594 --> 01:18:09,249 I mean, I gave up the cigarettes, didn't I? 1008 01:18:10,555 --> 01:18:13,427 You think I don't know how to change? 1009 01:18:13,471 --> 01:18:15,603 Huh? 1010 01:18:15,647 --> 01:18:19,912 You think I-I don't know what this stuff is doing to me? 1011 01:18:19,956 --> 01:18:23,786 Sure, I hate myself as much as you do when I'm drinking. 1012 01:18:23,829 --> 01:18:27,354 Well, then, why in God's name do you put yourself through it? 1013 01:18:27,398 --> 01:18:31,576 Because I hate myself even more when I'm not. 1014 01:18:47,461 --> 01:18:50,334 What about my faith? 1015 01:18:50,377 --> 01:18:52,640 [sighs] What about it? 1016 01:18:52,684 --> 01:18:54,947 -We believe in different things. -So? 1017 01:18:55,992 --> 01:18:58,342 I mean, we've always known that. 1018 01:18:58,385 --> 01:19:00,561 But it's gotten so much worse, Gerry. 1019 01:19:00,605 --> 01:19:03,695 I mean... the mockery. 1020 01:19:03,739 --> 01:19:07,612 No, I have never mocked you, Stella. 1021 01:19:07,655 --> 01:19:10,267 Oh, well, if that's not mockery, then I don't know what is. 1022 01:19:10,310 --> 01:19:11,921 It's-it's a debate, right? 1023 01:19:11,964 --> 01:19:14,445 We're... No, we're talking about debating the... 1024 01:19:14,488 --> 01:19:18,362 the-the greatest deception that we've known 1025 01:19:18,405 --> 01:19:20,712 -in our entire lives. -No. No. 1026 01:19:20,756 --> 01:19:23,889 [voice shaking]: We are talking about... 1027 01:19:26,413 --> 01:19:28,024 -...respect. -[scoffs] 1028 01:19:28,067 --> 01:19:29,286 Stella. 1029 01:19:29,329 --> 01:19:33,420 The joking and the poking fun and... 1030 01:19:33,464 --> 01:19:35,466 the derision and scorn. 1031 01:19:35,509 --> 01:19:37,033 I mean, it-it... 1032 01:19:39,035 --> 01:19:43,430 It's like you-you have no idea how much you hurt me and... 1033 01:19:43,474 --> 01:19:45,476 Or maybe you do and you just don't care anymore. 1034 01:19:45,519 --> 01:19:47,173 I'm not sure which is worse. 1035 01:19:47,217 --> 01:19:50,481 Surely, Stella, then I have to be allowed my truth. 1036 01:19:50,524 --> 01:19:51,699 The truth. 1037 01:19:51,743 --> 01:19:53,266 You're doing it again. 1038 01:19:53,310 --> 01:19:55,355 -You're dismissing me. - [stammers] 1039 01:19:56,530 --> 01:19:58,576 [Gerry sighs] 1040 01:20:03,842 --> 01:20:06,758 [crying]: All I want is to feel close, you know? 1041 01:20:06,802 --> 01:20:08,804 It's too much. 1042 01:20:12,155 --> 01:20:13,721 [sniffles] 1043 01:20:13,765 --> 01:20:15,811 ♪ ♪ 1044 01:20:24,080 --> 01:20:26,125 ♪ ♪ 1045 01:20:32,262 --> 01:20:34,264 [quiet chatter] 1046 01:20:56,112 --> 01:20:58,114 [electronic chiming over P.A.] 1047 01:20:59,506 --> 01:21:01,421 WOMAN [over P.A.]: Attention, all passengers 1048 01:21:01,465 --> 01:21:04,990 for flight BM1463 to Glasgow... 1049 01:21:05,034 --> 01:21:06,862 -[announcement fades] -[grunts softly] 1050 01:21:08,602 --> 01:21:10,604 It's still chucking it down. 1051 01:21:20,136 --> 01:21:22,007 Sweet, modom? 1052 01:21:32,670 --> 01:21:34,324 Stella. 1053 01:21:36,630 --> 01:21:38,197 Uh... 1054 01:21:40,112 --> 01:21:43,376 My being with you is 1055 01:21:43,420 --> 01:21:46,423 the most wonderful thing there is. 1056 01:21:49,426 --> 01:21:51,297 I adore you. 1057 01:21:52,908 --> 01:21:56,824 And when I think of the future, all I think about is you. 1058 01:21:59,001 --> 01:22:01,568 And I wish I had been there with you in Belfast, 1059 01:22:01,612 --> 01:22:03,831 and I know that I'll never be able to share 1060 01:22:03,875 --> 01:22:06,269 in what happened to you that day. 1061 01:22:09,446 --> 01:22:11,361 But, um... 1062 01:22:15,365 --> 01:22:18,759 I-I-I won't ever... 1063 01:22:18,803 --> 01:22:22,024 be able to accept your version of events, 1064 01:22:22,067 --> 01:22:26,071 and I'll tell you why. 1065 01:22:26,115 --> 01:22:29,205 Because... 1066 01:22:29,248 --> 01:22:34,819 passing through this world beside you, 1067 01:22:34,862 --> 01:22:38,214 that's the real miracle. 1068 01:22:45,525 --> 01:22:47,353 The miracle is you. 1069 01:22:50,226 --> 01:22:52,054 [sighs softly] 1070 01:23:12,552 --> 01:23:13,945 Uh... 1071 01:23:27,089 --> 01:23:29,134 ♪ ♪ 1072 01:23:53,811 --> 01:23:55,291 Look. 1073 01:23:57,684 --> 01:23:59,295 Is that a plane? 1074 01:24:17,617 --> 01:24:19,358 STELLA: It's not moving. 1075 01:24:23,841 --> 01:24:26,104 I think it's the morning star. 1076 01:24:34,243 --> 01:24:36,375 Do you think we'll ever get away? 1077 01:24:37,942 --> 01:24:39,465 [Stella chuckles softly] 1078 01:24:41,989 --> 01:24:44,514 We can only hope. 1079 01:24:44,557 --> 01:24:46,646 ♪ ♪ 1080 01:25:04,186 --> 01:25:06,231 ♪ ♪ 1081 01:25:21,246 --> 01:25:23,248 ♪ ♪ 1082 01:25:37,349 --> 01:25:40,352 ["This Time Tomorrow" by The Kinks playing] 1083 01:25:45,879 --> 01:25:49,709 ♪ This time tomorrow ♪ 1084 01:25:49,753 --> 01:25:53,409 ♪ Where will we be? ♪ 1085 01:25:53,452 --> 01:25:57,239 ♪ On a spaceship somewhere ♪ 1086 01:25:57,282 --> 01:26:04,246 ♪ Sailing across an empty sea ♪ 1087 01:26:04,289 --> 01:26:08,075 ♪ This time tomorrow ♪ 1088 01:26:08,119 --> 01:26:12,341 ♪ What will we know? ♪ 1089 01:26:12,384 --> 01:26:15,996 ♪ Will we still be here ♪ 1090 01:26:16,040 --> 01:26:22,002 ♪ Watching an in-flight movie show? ♪ 1091 01:26:22,046 --> 01:26:25,745 ♪ I'll leave the sun behind me ♪ 1092 01:26:25,789 --> 01:26:27,747 ♪ And I'll watch the clouds ♪ 1093 01:26:27,791 --> 01:26:32,535 ♪ As they sadly pass me by ♪ 1094 01:26:32,578 --> 01:26:35,581 ♪ Seven miles below me ♪ 1095 01:26:35,625 --> 01:26:37,583 ♪ I can see the world ♪ 1096 01:26:37,627 --> 01:26:43,285 ♪ And it ain't so big at all ♪ 1097 01:26:43,328 --> 01:26:48,377 ♪ Well, this time tomorrow ♪ 1098 01:26:48,420 --> 01:26:52,032 ♪ What will we see? ♪ 1099 01:26:52,076 --> 01:26:55,993 ♪ Fields full of houses ♪ 1100 01:26:56,036 --> 01:27:02,608 ♪ Endless rows of crowded streets ♪ 1101 01:27:02,652 --> 01:27:06,264 ♪ I don't know where I'm going ♪ 1102 01:27:06,308 --> 01:27:10,442 ♪ I don't want to see ♪ 1103 01:27:10,486 --> 01:27:13,924 ♪ I feel the world below me ♪ 1104 01:27:13,967 --> 01:27:16,753 -♪ Looking up ♪ -♪ Looking up, looking up ♪ 1105 01:27:16,796 --> 01:27:21,627 ♪ Looking up at me ♪ 1106 01:27:37,339 --> 01:27:40,559 ♪ Leave the sun behind me ♪ 1107 01:27:40,603 --> 01:27:42,561 ♪ And I'll watch the clouds ♪ 1108 01:27:42,605 --> 01:27:46,173 ♪ As they sadly pass me by ♪ 1109 01:27:46,217 --> 01:27:50,265 ♪ And I'm in perpetual motion ♪ 1110 01:27:50,308 --> 01:27:52,179 ♪ And the world below ♪ 1111 01:27:52,223 --> 01:27:57,402 ♪ Doesn't matter much to me ♪ 1112 01:27:57,446 --> 01:28:02,886 ♪ Well, this time tomorrow ♪ 1113 01:28:02,929 --> 01:28:06,411 ♪ Where will we be? ♪ 1114 01:28:06,455 --> 01:28:10,197 ♪ On a spaceship somewhere ♪ 1115 01:28:10,241 --> 01:28:16,203 ♪ Sailing across an empty sea ♪ 1116 01:28:16,247 --> 01:28:21,339 ♪ Well, this time tomorrow ♪ 1117 01:28:25,038 --> 01:28:28,825 ♪ This time tomorrow ♪ 1118 01:28:28,868 --> 01:28:32,350 ♪ Where will we be? ♪ 1119 01:28:42,186 --> 01:28:44,144 [song ends] 1120 01:28:44,188 --> 01:28:46,277 ♪ ♪ 1121 01:29:16,220 --> 01:29:18,309 ♪ ♪ 1122 01:29:48,252 --> 01:29:50,341 ♪ ♪ 1123 01:30:20,284 --> 01:30:22,373 ♪ ♪ 1124 01:30:41,523 --> 01:30:43,525 [music fades]