1 00:00:33,783 --> 00:00:36,036 (birds chirping) 2 00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:40,040 (children chattering faintly) 3 00:00:40,832 --> 00:00:43,084 (dog barking) 4 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:48,798 (laughter) 5 00:00:55,597 --> 00:00:58,975 -(birds chirping) -(traffic rumbling quietly) 6 00:00:59,017 --> 00:01:01,311 (children chattering faintly) 7 00:01:02,187 --> 00:01:04,397 (faint, indistinct chatter continues) 8 00:01:10,445 --> 00:01:14,074 STELLA: We never speak about what happened in Belfast. 9 00:01:16,034 --> 00:01:18,244 -(bell jingling) -(quiet chatter) 10 00:01:20,455 --> 00:01:22,540 ♪ ♪ 11 00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:31,549 Perhaps because beforehand we were so full of hope. 12 00:01:31,591 --> 00:01:34,094 -CHILD: Hi, Mrs. Gilmore. -YOUNG STELLA: Hello. 13 00:01:34,844 --> 00:01:37,388 (gunshots) 14 00:01:40,266 --> 00:01:42,769 (children screaming) 15 00:01:47,565 --> 00:01:49,609 ♪ ♪ 16 00:01:51,111 --> 00:01:54,697 STELLA: But a single day can change the course of any life. 17 00:01:59,953 --> 00:02:02,163 (medical monitor beeping) 18 00:02:03,748 --> 00:02:05,792 (babies crying) 19 00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,715 ♪ ♪ 20 00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:19,764 Leaving Ireland, leaving our home... 21 00:02:22,642 --> 00:02:24,769 ...alone, 22 00:02:24,811 --> 00:02:27,897 unmoored, adrift. 23 00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:36,364 -And now... -GERRY: Five? 24 00:02:36,406 --> 00:02:41,119 ...we seem to have become exiles from each other 25 00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:43,746 and the promises we made. 26 00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:45,957 (blows softly) 27 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:48,251 The promise I made. 28 00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:51,504 ♪ Oh-oh, yes ♪ 29 00:02:51,546 --> 00:02:54,716 ♪ I'm the great pretender ♪ 30 00:02:54,757 --> 00:02:56,426 ("The Great Pretender" by The Platters playing) 31 00:02:56,467 --> 00:03:01,514 ♪ Pretending that I'm doing well ♪ 32 00:03:02,724 --> 00:03:05,727 ♪ My need is such ♪ 33 00:03:05,768 --> 00:03:08,688 ♪ I pretend too much ♪ 34 00:03:08,730 --> 00:03:10,481 ♪ I'm lonely ♪ 35 00:03:10,523 --> 00:03:14,903 (over radio): ♪ But no one can tell... ♪ 36 00:03:14,944 --> 00:03:16,696 Bye, then. 37 00:03:17,697 --> 00:03:19,449 Bye, darling. 38 00:03:20,909 --> 00:03:23,661 Sure I can't tempt you? 39 00:03:23,703 --> 00:03:25,496 What's that? 40 00:03:26,331 --> 00:03:27,832 (Stella chuckles) 41 00:03:27,874 --> 00:03:30,835 ♪ I played the game ♪ 42 00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:33,171 ♪ But to my real shame ♪ 43 00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:34,964 -(door opens) -♪ You've left me ♪ 44 00:03:35,006 --> 00:03:36,966 -(door closes) -♪ To grieve... ♪ 45 00:03:38,551 --> 00:03:40,929 (dogs barking in distance) 46 00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:47,352 CONGREGATION: ♪ Snow had fallen ♪ 47 00:03:47,393 --> 00:03:50,146 ♪ Snow on snow ♪ 48 00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:54,025 ♪ Snow on snow... ♪ 49 00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:56,527 PRIEST: The body of Christ. 50 00:03:56,569 --> 00:03:58,029 -James... -Amen. 51 00:03:58,071 --> 00:04:01,032 ...chapter four, verse 14 tells us 52 00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:05,787 you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. 53 00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:09,540 What is your life? 54 00:04:09,582 --> 00:04:14,379 You are a mist that appears for a little while 55 00:04:14,420 --> 00:04:16,381 and then vanishes. 56 00:04:16,422 --> 00:04:20,218 On this night of the year more than any other, 57 00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:23,388 we are reminded to cherish those... 58 00:04:23,429 --> 00:04:25,390 STELLA: I just wanted to say, have a lovely Christmas. 59 00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:28,017 -Oh, happy Christmas, dear. -Yeah, so nice to see you. 60 00:04:28,059 --> 00:04:29,519 -Yeah. -See you soon. 61 00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:30,895 Okay. 62 00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:34,065 Good night. Happy Christmas to you. 63 00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:35,358 -Merry Christmas. -Good night. 64 00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:37,443 (chuckling): Oh, sorry. 65 00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,577 (sighs, sniffs) 66 00:04:47,453 --> 00:04:49,330 (groans, sniffs) 67 00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:52,292 (locks clicking) 68 00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:55,420 STELLA: I'm back. 69 00:04:55,461 --> 00:04:57,755 (chuckling): It's freezing out there. 70 00:04:57,797 --> 00:04:59,841 (Gerry snoring) 71 00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:13,313 (sighs) 72 00:05:22,530 --> 00:05:24,782 (snoring continues) 73 00:05:29,662 --> 00:05:32,915 (classical music playing faintly over headphones) 74 00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:45,928 (sighs) 75 00:06:11,579 --> 00:06:13,831 (faint, distant chatter) 76 00:06:57,875 --> 00:06:59,919 ♪ ♪ 77 00:07:10,513 --> 00:07:12,598 (door opens) 78 00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:17,895 (sets plate down) 79 00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:28,489 (takes deep breath) 80 00:07:50,011 --> 00:07:52,096 (printer whirring) 81 00:08:03,858 --> 00:08:06,152 (choral music playing quietly) 82 00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:11,449 STELLA: It's ringing. 83 00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:13,451 It's the answer machine. 84 00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:15,119 -GERRY: Leave a message. -Aye. 85 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:16,996 (phone beeps) 86 00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:21,000 Hi, Michael. It's Mum and Dad here. 87 00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:22,460 Not sure what time it is 88 00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:23,836 -where you are. -GERRY: Merry Christmas, son. 89 00:08:23,878 --> 00:08:25,880 Give Toby a kiss from Granddad. 90 00:08:25,922 --> 00:08:27,465 (chuckles) 91 00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:30,426 Just calling to see how you and the family are settling in. 92 00:08:30,468 --> 00:08:32,803 You know, first Christmas in your new abode. 93 00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:37,016 All right, well, uh, we're around, so... 94 00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:39,852 Lots of love. 95 00:08:39,894 --> 00:08:42,188 (choral music continues playing quietly) 96 00:08:57,453 --> 00:08:59,205 What's this? 97 00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:01,040 Surprise. 98 00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:04,460 Don't tell me. Don't tell me. 99 00:09:04,502 --> 00:09:06,003 (Stella chuckling) 100 00:09:06,045 --> 00:09:07,171 Shoes. 101 00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:09,131 (both chuckling) 102 00:09:10,675 --> 00:09:13,594 It's a little something-- for both of us. 103 00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:20,685 GERRY: Amsterdam? 104 00:09:20,726 --> 00:09:23,729 I thought it was time for an adventure. 105 00:09:25,356 --> 00:09:28,651 That's... fantastic. 106 00:09:28,693 --> 00:09:30,611 (both laughing) 107 00:09:30,653 --> 00:09:33,030 -(stammers) Flights, hotel? -Mm. 108 00:09:33,072 --> 00:09:36,492 You've outdone yourself, Mrs. Gilmore. 109 00:09:36,534 --> 00:09:38,494 Start the New Year off with a bang. 110 00:09:38,536 --> 00:09:40,121 You'd better believe it. 111 00:09:40,162 --> 00:09:42,331 (both laughing) 112 00:09:42,373 --> 00:09:44,917 (sighs) You and me. 113 00:09:44,959 --> 00:09:46,335 Me and you. 114 00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,799 ♪ ♪ 115 00:09:52,633 --> 00:09:54,552 GERRY: Do you have the passports, or do I? 116 00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:56,554 STELLA: Passports, eye drops, phone charger. 117 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:57,847 All in your shoulder bag. 118 00:09:57,888 --> 00:09:59,599 GERRY: What about my special shampoo? 119 00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:01,767 STELLA: That, too. 120 00:10:01,809 --> 00:10:04,979 Uh, what's the limit again? 121 00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:08,899 That's six minutes. 122 00:10:08,941 --> 00:10:10,901 Someone whose opinion I trust 123 00:10:10,943 --> 00:10:14,155 once said I was flamboyant wearing this. 124 00:10:14,196 --> 00:10:17,742 I was never entirely sure whether that was a good thing 125 00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:19,910 or a bad thing. 126 00:10:19,952 --> 00:10:21,746 Oh, no, the knot's all wrong. 127 00:10:21,787 --> 00:10:23,789 -What? -Here. 128 00:10:24,582 --> 00:10:26,417 (Gerry sighs) 129 00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,002 STELLA: Right. 130 00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:32,548 -(Stella giggling) -Don't choke me. 131 00:10:32,590 --> 00:10:34,717 -It's tempting. -(laughing) 132 00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:37,428 -All right. -There. 133 00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,597 -That's better. -Yeah. That's good. 134 00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:42,058 -Okay. I'll... -Right. 135 00:10:42,099 --> 00:10:44,477 Oh, that's seven minutes. I'm calling them. 136 00:10:44,518 --> 00:10:45,728 (car horn honking) 137 00:10:45,770 --> 00:10:47,396 Uh, there's the taxi now. 138 00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:49,273 Oh! 139 00:10:49,315 --> 00:10:51,317 Right. Uh... 140 00:10:51,359 --> 00:10:53,903 -Uh, case. -Right. 141 00:10:53,944 --> 00:10:56,280 -Is that everything? -Uh, yeah. Think so. 142 00:10:56,322 --> 00:10:58,282 Sure? (sighs) 143 00:10:58,324 --> 00:11:00,868 (locks clicking) 144 00:11:11,545 --> 00:11:13,839 ♪ ♪ 145 00:11:21,931 --> 00:11:24,642 (indistinct chatter) 146 00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:26,435 Well, some people have more luggage than sense. 147 00:11:26,477 --> 00:11:27,853 There it is. 148 00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:32,400 GERRY: Where did you say the shampoo was again? 149 00:11:33,734 --> 00:11:36,028 (indistinct chatter) 150 00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,992 Sweet before takeoff, modom? 151 00:11:46,038 --> 00:11:47,415 (chiming) 152 00:11:47,456 --> 00:11:48,833 FLIGHT ATTENDANT: For everyone's comfort and safety, 153 00:11:48,874 --> 00:11:51,043 would you please place all hand baggage 154 00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:52,837 under the seats in front of you 155 00:11:52,878 --> 00:11:55,881 or in the overhead lockers, providing they will close. 156 00:11:57,675 --> 00:11:59,510 Oh. Nearly forgot. 157 00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,011 What? 158 00:12:02,596 --> 00:12:05,224 -Stop you from being sick. -How? 159 00:12:06,392 --> 00:12:08,602 It's a wristband. 160 00:12:08,644 --> 00:12:11,480 Someone at church recommended them. 161 00:12:13,107 --> 00:12:15,776 Presses on your pulse point here. 162 00:12:15,818 --> 00:12:18,028 I'd be better off saying a prayer. 163 00:12:18,070 --> 00:12:20,865 Please, God, don't make me vomit on this flight. 164 00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:23,284 (Gerry laughs) 165 00:12:28,956 --> 00:12:32,042 -(bells chiming) -(birds chirping) 166 00:12:36,464 --> 00:12:38,758 ♪ ♪ 167 00:12:49,518 --> 00:12:51,103 (sighs) 168 00:12:52,354 --> 00:12:53,939 -STELLA: All right? -GERRY: Yeah. 169 00:12:53,981 --> 00:12:55,941 STELLA: Looks nice. 170 00:13:01,238 --> 00:13:02,740 -GERRY: Hello. -STELLA: Hello. 171 00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:04,074 -RECEPTIONIST: Hello. -GERRY: How are you? 172 00:13:04,116 --> 00:13:05,576 RECEPTIONIST: Welcome to Amsterdam. 173 00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:06,911 STELLA: Thank you. 174 00:13:06,952 --> 00:13:09,163 -Oh. (sniffs) -(Gerry clears throat) 175 00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:12,458 (Stella chuckles) 176 00:13:13,709 --> 00:13:15,461 -(sniffs) -(bell dings) 177 00:13:16,545 --> 00:13:17,922 Here we are. 178 00:13:17,963 --> 00:13:19,548 (Gerry grunts) 179 00:13:24,470 --> 00:13:27,223 STELLA: Huh. Hard to tell. 180 00:13:29,517 --> 00:13:31,310 GERRY: Let's try this way. 181 00:13:33,312 --> 00:13:35,064 Yeah, this is it. 182 00:13:42,988 --> 00:13:44,782 (groans, sighs) 183 00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:47,284 -Try the other one. -(sighs) 184 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,037 -(beeps) -BOTH: Oh. 185 00:13:50,079 --> 00:13:52,206 -There you go. We're in. -(laughs) 186 00:13:52,998 --> 00:13:55,167 Let there be... 187 00:13:56,168 --> 00:13:57,962 -...light. -(chuckles) 188 00:13:58,003 --> 00:14:00,506 Oh, very nice. 189 00:14:00,548 --> 00:14:01,841 Oh. 190 00:14:01,882 --> 00:14:04,468 It's bigger than I thought. 191 00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:05,678 It's lovely. 192 00:14:05,719 --> 00:14:07,388 GERRY: Yeah. 193 00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:13,227 STELLA: Oh, would you look at that gray sky? 194 00:14:16,397 --> 00:14:17,982 (horn honks in distance) 195 00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,776 Maybe next time, you book somewhere 196 00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:22,695 in one of the sunnier hemispheres? 197 00:14:22,736 --> 00:14:24,530 (Stella chuckling) 198 00:14:26,073 --> 00:14:28,200 Time to test the bed. 199 00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:32,538 -(groans) -(Stella chuckles) 200 00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:34,540 -(sighs) -How is it? 201 00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:36,333 Hard as a brick runway. 202 00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:37,793 (both laugh) 203 00:14:37,835 --> 00:14:39,795 (sighs) Perfect. 204 00:14:39,837 --> 00:14:41,881 In fact, uh... 205 00:14:41,922 --> 00:14:43,966 I might have a wee snooze. 206 00:14:44,008 --> 00:14:45,676 Oh, it's the middle of the afternoon. 207 00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:47,219 So? 208 00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:49,263 So, you never take a nap in the middle of the afternoon. 209 00:14:49,305 --> 00:14:51,515 Yeah, but we're on holiday. It's always different. 210 00:14:51,557 --> 00:14:54,852 -You don't mind, do you? -Oh, if you insist. 211 00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:57,521 -Half an hour. No more. -(both laughing) 212 00:14:57,563 --> 00:14:58,856 Chocolate, sir? 213 00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:00,065 Oh, thank you, modom. 214 00:15:00,107 --> 00:15:01,817 (Stella chuckles) 215 00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:03,569 (Gerry sighs) 216 00:15:09,700 --> 00:15:11,410 Oh, lovely. 217 00:15:12,536 --> 00:15:14,371 This is the life. 218 00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:15,956 (Stella chuckles) 219 00:15:20,252 --> 00:15:21,795 (Stella chuckles softly) 220 00:15:21,837 --> 00:15:24,089 ♪ ♪ 221 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,094 -Ooh. -(both chuckle) 222 00:15:29,136 --> 00:15:30,220 (elevator bell dings) 223 00:15:30,262 --> 00:15:31,889 -Ah. Hello. -Hello. 224 00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:33,349 Good evening. 225 00:15:33,390 --> 00:15:35,809 Um, could you recommend somewhere not too pricey 226 00:15:35,851 --> 00:15:38,896 -for a drink this evening? -You are in the right place. 227 00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:40,856 Amsterdam is so full of options. 228 00:15:40,898 --> 00:15:42,232 -Right. -Oh. 229 00:15:42,274 --> 00:15:44,234 (traffic light clicking rapidly) 230 00:15:44,276 --> 00:15:46,528 -(distant siren) -(lively chatter) 231 00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:49,823 (bicycle bell dings) 232 00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:51,742 ("The Mermaid" by Folksurprise playing) 233 00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:55,204 ♪ And the ocean waves do roll ♪ 234 00:15:55,245 --> 00:15:58,248 ♪ And the stormy winds do blow... ♪ 235 00:15:58,290 --> 00:16:01,961 STELLA: Trust you to find the only Irish pub in Amsterdam. 236 00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:05,756 God, a well-built ant could piss more. 237 00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:07,675 STELLA: And that's a double. 238 00:16:07,716 --> 00:16:08,884 You're learning. 239 00:16:08,926 --> 00:16:11,178 Killing you with kindness. 240 00:16:13,889 --> 00:16:15,474 You and me. 241 00:16:16,517 --> 00:16:18,143 Me and you. 242 00:16:18,185 --> 00:16:21,105 ♪ This pretty mermaid has warned me of our doom... ♪ 243 00:16:21,146 --> 00:16:24,483 I suppose we're lucky to have each other to ignore. 244 00:16:24,525 --> 00:16:25,776 (laughs) 245 00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:29,321 ♪ And the ocean waves do roll ♪ 246 00:16:29,363 --> 00:16:32,700 ♪ And the stormy winds do blow ♪ 247 00:16:32,741 --> 00:16:36,286 ♪ And we poor sailors are skipping at the top... ♪ 248 00:16:36,328 --> 00:16:39,999 The arrogance of amplification in a space this size. 249 00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:41,500 You used to like this one. 250 00:16:41,542 --> 00:16:44,294 ♪ While the landlubbers lie down below ♪ 251 00:16:44,336 --> 00:16:47,715 ♪ This pretty mermaid has warned me of our doom ♪ 252 00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:50,217 ♪ We will sink to the bottom of the sea ♪ 253 00:16:50,259 --> 00:16:51,927 (singing along): ♪ For me ♪ 254 00:16:51,969 --> 00:16:55,806 ♪ And the ocean waves do roll ♪ 255 00:16:55,848 --> 00:16:59,226 ♪ And the stormy winds do blow ♪ 256 00:16:59,268 --> 00:17:01,729 (fading): ♪ And we poor sailors... ♪ 257 00:17:01,770 --> 00:17:04,398 ♪ ♪ 258 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:08,318 GERRY: You know, it's Ireland's greatest export: 259 00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:12,197 a bullshit lesson on how to enjoy yourself. 260 00:17:13,198 --> 00:17:15,826 -That and the car bomb. -Oh, would you... 261 00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:17,995 Would you come away from the edge? 262 00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:21,248 -Gives me the weirdest feeling. -What does? 263 00:17:27,004 --> 00:17:28,547 STELLA: Come on. 264 00:17:30,174 --> 00:17:33,343 -GERRY: All right. -All right. Hold my arm. 265 00:17:33,385 --> 00:17:35,429 You're a liability, you are. 266 00:17:35,471 --> 00:17:36,847 (bathwater running in other room) 267 00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:39,433 (reporter speaking Dutch over TV) 268 00:17:39,475 --> 00:17:41,727 (bathwater continues running) 269 00:17:50,027 --> 00:17:52,613 ♪ ♪ 270 00:17:52,654 --> 00:17:55,407 -(birds chirping) -(children chattering faintly) 271 00:18:07,211 --> 00:18:09,129 (chatter in Dutch over TV) 272 00:18:09,171 --> 00:18:11,423 (bathwater continues running in other room) 273 00:18:27,648 --> 00:18:29,608 (bathwater stops) 274 00:18:30,776 --> 00:18:32,861 (splashing in other room) 275 00:18:32,903 --> 00:18:35,155 ♪ ♪ 276 00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:39,368 (TV continues in other room) 277 00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:49,545 (Dutch chatter, laughter over TV) 278 00:18:57,219 --> 00:18:59,596 (water splashing in other room) 279 00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:07,437 (bathwater draining in other room) 280 00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:24,913 (grunts softly) 281 00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:29,585 (changes channel) 282 00:19:29,626 --> 00:19:31,712 REPORTER (over TV): Unlike the Provisional IRA, 283 00:19:31,753 --> 00:19:34,631 the new IRA possesses limited weaponry. 284 00:19:34,673 --> 00:19:38,135 It's enough to mount a campaign but not on the same scale 285 00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:41,096 as the paramilitary groups of the past. 286 00:19:41,138 --> 00:19:43,473 Following its ceasefire in 1994, 287 00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:45,684 the Provisional IRA decommissioned 288 00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:48,687 the bulk of its arsenal, much of it supplied by Libya... 289 00:19:48,729 --> 00:19:50,814 On and on it goes. 290 00:19:51,899 --> 00:19:53,275 Aye. 291 00:19:53,317 --> 00:19:55,819 Are you, uh, done in there? 292 00:19:55,861 --> 00:19:57,237 Aye. 293 00:19:57,279 --> 00:19:58,906 MAN (over TV): Forensic examination has revealed 294 00:19:58,947 --> 00:20:01,617 that some of the weapons seized from dissident Republicans 295 00:20:01,658 --> 00:20:03,869 trace back to the original stockpiles 296 00:20:03,911 --> 00:20:05,621 of the Provisional IRA. 297 00:20:05,662 --> 00:20:09,416 There are some figures, some senior leadership figures, 298 00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:11,877 who never bought into the peace process... 299 00:20:11,919 --> 00:20:14,213 (TV continues quietly) 300 00:20:18,717 --> 00:20:20,469 (TV shuts off) 301 00:20:32,856 --> 00:20:34,900 S-Stella. 302 00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:36,526 Have you seen my statins? 303 00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:43,909 Stella. 304 00:20:43,951 --> 00:20:46,245 My statins-- have you seen them? 305 00:20:53,252 --> 00:20:55,545 (Gerry sighs) 306 00:20:57,923 --> 00:21:00,884 Have you looked in the wash bag? 307 00:21:00,926 --> 00:21:03,262 -Uh... -(Stella sighs) 308 00:21:10,477 --> 00:21:12,604 STELLA: Mm. There. 309 00:21:13,981 --> 00:21:15,607 Sorry. 310 00:21:27,828 --> 00:21:28,870 (exhales sharply) 311 00:21:28,912 --> 00:21:30,789 (breathing deeply) 312 00:21:30,831 --> 00:21:32,916 ♪ ♪ 313 00:21:45,721 --> 00:21:46,763 (bell clangs) 314 00:21:46,805 --> 00:21:48,307 STELLA: It's a religious community. 315 00:21:48,348 --> 00:21:49,683 GERRY: A convent? 316 00:21:49,725 --> 00:21:51,977 STELLA: Uh, no, uh, more like a sanctuary. 317 00:21:52,978 --> 00:21:54,104 I think it's that way. 318 00:21:54,146 --> 00:21:55,856 GERRY: You think or you know? 319 00:21:55,897 --> 00:21:57,983 'Cause having a map and knowing the way are not the same thing. 320 00:21:58,025 --> 00:21:59,651 STELLA: Oh, shush. 321 00:22:02,946 --> 00:22:04,489 GERRY: Here. 322 00:22:12,789 --> 00:22:14,791 Behold. 323 00:22:14,833 --> 00:22:16,668 The Begijnhof. 324 00:22:18,337 --> 00:22:20,088 -In there? -Mm. 325 00:22:22,507 --> 00:22:25,594 -Lead on. -(both chuckle) 326 00:22:25,635 --> 00:22:27,679 ♪ ♪ 327 00:22:38,899 --> 00:22:40,942 (Stella sighs) 328 00:22:40,984 --> 00:22:42,486 (chuckles) 329 00:22:44,029 --> 00:22:45,989 (hushed): It's home to some of the oldest 330 00:22:46,031 --> 00:22:47,574 buildings in the city. 331 00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:49,993 For women who wanted to live alone. 332 00:22:50,035 --> 00:22:54,498 A sisterhood of unmarried Catholic women. 333 00:22:55,707 --> 00:22:59,920 In the 1600s, Catholic worship was... 334 00:22:59,961 --> 00:23:04,299 was banned by the Protestant powers that be. 335 00:23:04,341 --> 00:23:06,843 Why are we whispering? 336 00:23:06,885 --> 00:23:08,929 (Stella laughs) 337 00:23:11,223 --> 00:23:13,600 Public mass wasn't allowed, 338 00:23:13,642 --> 00:23:18,688 so they used to do it in their own homes, you know? 339 00:23:18,730 --> 00:23:20,023 In secret. 340 00:23:20,065 --> 00:23:22,484 Yeah, which is why it doesn't look like a church 341 00:23:22,526 --> 00:23:24,444 -from the outside. -It's camouflaged. 342 00:23:24,486 --> 00:23:28,198 They lived like nuns but... 343 00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:32,869 without all the... all the vows and what have you. 344 00:23:36,998 --> 00:23:38,542 Hmm. 345 00:23:43,088 --> 00:23:46,091 Reminds me of van Gogh's prison yard. 346 00:23:46,133 --> 00:23:47,968 Nonsense. 347 00:23:49,094 --> 00:23:50,220 Excuse me. 348 00:23:50,262 --> 00:23:52,764 Uh, is-is the church open yet? 349 00:23:52,806 --> 00:23:55,475 (Irish accent): Which church were you hoping to see? 350 00:23:55,517 --> 00:23:57,144 (laughing): Oh, you're Irish. 351 00:23:57,185 --> 00:23:58,395 -She's Irish. -(Gerry chuckles) 352 00:23:58,437 --> 00:23:59,938 Guilty as charged. 353 00:23:59,980 --> 00:24:03,400 Waterford originally, but I've lived all over, really. 354 00:24:03,442 --> 00:24:04,651 County Derry. 355 00:24:04,693 --> 00:24:06,570 From a townland nobody's heard of 356 00:24:06,611 --> 00:24:08,572 -in a place nobody knows. -(chuckles) 357 00:24:08,613 --> 00:24:09,781 Do you live here? 358 00:24:09,823 --> 00:24:12,868 Oh, yes, I'm one of the lucky ones. 359 00:24:12,909 --> 00:24:14,953 And what brings you to Amsterdam? 360 00:24:16,955 --> 00:24:18,957 Well, um... 361 00:24:18,999 --> 00:24:21,626 we're not getting any younger, so... 362 00:24:22,586 --> 00:24:24,296 -(chuckles) -(Stella chuckling) 363 00:24:24,337 --> 00:24:25,755 And tell me again, 364 00:24:25,797 --> 00:24:27,507 which of the churches was it you wanted to see? 365 00:24:27,549 --> 00:24:29,009 The Catholic one. 366 00:24:29,050 --> 00:24:30,260 Oh. 367 00:24:30,302 --> 00:24:31,511 It's just through here. 368 00:24:31,553 --> 00:24:33,972 Oh, thank you. 369 00:24:34,014 --> 00:24:35,515 -Okay. -Gerry. 370 00:25:10,342 --> 00:25:12,761 ♪ ♪ 371 00:25:32,364 --> 00:25:34,658 ♪ ♪ 372 00:25:53,593 --> 00:25:55,887 ♪ ♪ 373 00:26:02,561 --> 00:26:06,106 GERRY: "The miracle of Amsterdam." 374 00:26:08,900 --> 00:26:11,236 Ye olde graphic novel. 375 00:26:25,083 --> 00:26:30,589 "In the year 1345 in the city of Amsterdam, 376 00:26:30,630 --> 00:26:35,093 a man lay dying in a house on Kalverstraat." 377 00:26:35,135 --> 00:26:37,095 Solid opening gambit. 378 00:26:38,096 --> 00:26:41,099 "A priest came and gave the man communion. 379 00:26:42,058 --> 00:26:46,563 "After he had gone, the sick man felt so unwell 380 00:26:46,605 --> 00:26:48,982 that he vomited up the sacred host..." 381 00:26:49,024 --> 00:26:51,776 -Lovely. -"...into a bowl." 382 00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:55,947 That's really put me in the mood for lunch. 383 00:26:56,990 --> 00:27:00,243 "The man died the next morning, and his maid, 384 00:27:00,285 --> 00:27:05,915 "she threw the contents of the bowl into the fire. 385 00:27:05,957 --> 00:27:07,584 "However, the following day, 386 00:27:07,626 --> 00:27:12,047 "when the maid checked the fireplace... 387 00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:18,887 "...there it was, the host... 388 00:27:20,972 --> 00:27:24,601 ...untouched by the flames." 389 00:27:24,643 --> 00:27:26,936 ♪ ♪ 390 00:27:30,982 --> 00:27:36,363 The priest had this place built to commemorate the miracle. 391 00:27:38,740 --> 00:27:40,241 Which was? 392 00:27:43,787 --> 00:27:46,331 The indestructible host. 393 00:27:46,373 --> 00:27:48,792 Well, it seems a bit... 394 00:27:48,833 --> 00:27:52,420 minor league as miracles go. 395 00:27:52,462 --> 00:27:54,756 You know, a fireproof wafer. 396 00:27:54,798 --> 00:27:56,549 You know as well as I do, Gerry, 397 00:27:56,591 --> 00:27:58,259 that miracles come in all shapes and sizes. 398 00:27:58,301 --> 00:28:02,681 Stella, what happened to you was not miraculous. 399 00:28:02,722 --> 00:28:06,226 Right, it was perfectly within the bounds of possibilit... 400 00:28:14,234 --> 00:28:16,319 ♪ ♪ 401 00:28:19,698 --> 00:28:21,908 (bicycle bells dinging) 402 00:28:25,787 --> 00:28:28,039 (speaking Dutch) 403 00:28:35,672 --> 00:28:37,465 (case pops open) 404 00:28:40,385 --> 00:28:43,179 GERRY: Every time I open my glasses case nowadays, 405 00:28:43,221 --> 00:28:46,307 I'm pleasantly surprised to find my glasses. 406 00:28:47,434 --> 00:28:49,269 Now, that's a miracle. 407 00:29:00,321 --> 00:29:02,866 The model married couple. 408 00:29:02,907 --> 00:29:05,368 I think you can see how much he cherishes her. 409 00:29:13,585 --> 00:29:17,088 Why is she protecting her stomach? 410 00:29:17,130 --> 00:29:19,215 ♪ ♪ 411 00:29:28,767 --> 00:29:31,019 (quiet chatter) 412 00:29:33,021 --> 00:29:35,064 (Stella groans softly) 413 00:29:42,989 --> 00:29:45,033 Everything all right? 414 00:29:45,074 --> 00:29:47,035 Oh, my feet are throbbing. 415 00:29:47,076 --> 00:29:48,745 I've been on my pegs all morning. 416 00:29:48,787 --> 00:29:50,955 Ah. You're not going to chicken out, are you? 417 00:29:50,997 --> 00:29:53,082 No, no. It's a pit stop. 418 00:29:54,542 --> 00:29:56,085 Okay. 419 00:29:56,127 --> 00:29:59,756 Look, I can't not see The Night Watch, so... 420 00:29:59,798 --> 00:30:01,674 -No. -So, um, why don't we meet 421 00:30:01,716 --> 00:30:04,886 in the café in, uh... 422 00:30:04,928 --> 00:30:07,347 -30 minutes for a bit of lunch? -Sure. 423 00:30:07,388 --> 00:30:08,765 Okay? 424 00:30:08,807 --> 00:30:10,767 All right. 425 00:30:10,809 --> 00:30:12,435 See ya. 426 00:30:16,606 --> 00:30:18,900 ♪ ♪ 427 00:30:18,942 --> 00:30:21,152 (quiet chatter) 428 00:30:38,545 --> 00:30:39,921 (Gerry exhales sharply) 429 00:30:39,963 --> 00:30:43,299 That cold, it would cut right through you. 430 00:30:43,341 --> 00:30:46,344 (both sigh) 431 00:30:48,513 --> 00:30:50,682 (Gerry groans) 432 00:30:50,723 --> 00:30:54,310 (both sighing) 433 00:31:00,817 --> 00:31:03,278 (Gerry grunts) 434 00:31:03,319 --> 00:31:05,655 Ah, God. 435 00:31:05,697 --> 00:31:07,991 STELLA: Oh. (chuckles) 436 00:31:08,032 --> 00:31:10,159 GERRY: Oh, yeah. (chuckles) 437 00:31:10,201 --> 00:31:13,371 (both continue sighing) 438 00:31:18,459 --> 00:31:21,838 Would-would you look what these socks have done to me. 439 00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:23,506 Egg timer. 440 00:31:23,548 --> 00:31:25,008 Look. Feel it. 441 00:31:25,049 --> 00:31:27,260 Uh, no, I'm happy to forgo that at the moment. 442 00:31:27,302 --> 00:31:29,262 (Gerry groans) 443 00:31:29,304 --> 00:31:31,514 Oh, God. 444 00:31:31,556 --> 00:31:33,850 (Gerry grunting) 445 00:31:33,892 --> 00:31:35,435 Stop it. 446 00:31:35,476 --> 00:31:38,855 (groans) The only thing that feels better than this is... 447 00:31:38,897 --> 00:31:41,357 -You'll make it worse. -(chuckling) 448 00:31:41,399 --> 00:31:46,529 Oh, I know you shouldn't, but when you give in, Stella... 449 00:31:46,571 --> 00:31:48,781 -when you give in... -You'll draw blood. 450 00:31:48,823 --> 00:31:50,700 -(Gerry grunts) -(Stella sighs) 451 00:31:50,742 --> 00:31:52,535 (sighs) 452 00:31:52,577 --> 00:31:54,662 Oh, that's better. 453 00:31:54,704 --> 00:31:58,249 (breathing heavily) 454 00:32:05,882 --> 00:32:07,258 What? 455 00:32:17,477 --> 00:32:19,395 (Stella chuckles) 456 00:32:22,565 --> 00:32:24,484 (Stella chuckles) 457 00:33:14,993 --> 00:33:16,285 (Gerry grunts) 458 00:33:16,327 --> 00:33:17,829 Help us with this, will you? 459 00:33:17,870 --> 00:33:20,331 (both laughing) 460 00:33:29,841 --> 00:33:31,551 Gerry? 461 00:33:32,927 --> 00:33:34,512 Hmm? 462 00:33:42,311 --> 00:33:45,690 Do you ever think about where you'd like to be buried? 463 00:33:47,900 --> 00:33:50,695 Other than with you, you mean? 464 00:33:53,239 --> 00:33:56,367 At home or in Scotland, I mean. 465 00:33:58,870 --> 00:34:01,164 Is Scotland not home? 466 00:34:09,047 --> 00:34:12,800 What happens when all of this stops? 467 00:34:12,842 --> 00:34:15,595 Then... 468 00:34:15,636 --> 00:34:17,555 there'll be no more. 469 00:34:23,770 --> 00:34:26,397 And what'll be the point then? 470 00:34:40,453 --> 00:34:42,538 ♪ ♪ 471 00:34:47,085 --> 00:34:49,378 -(bell tolling) -(birds chirping) 472 00:34:51,589 --> 00:34:53,591 (quiet chatter) 473 00:34:59,597 --> 00:35:02,517 -(glass clinks) -(drink pouring) 474 00:35:11,609 --> 00:35:13,402 (grunts softly) 475 00:35:25,790 --> 00:35:27,834 (drink pouring) 476 00:35:30,294 --> 00:35:32,547 (water running) 477 00:35:37,301 --> 00:35:40,263 -(loud thud, Stella gasps) -GERRY: Fuck! Jesus! 478 00:35:40,304 --> 00:35:43,224 -Stella! (groans) -Yes, I'm coming, Gerry. 479 00:35:43,266 --> 00:35:44,934 -I slipped. -Oh, come on. 480 00:35:44,976 --> 00:35:46,602 -(grunting) -Come on. 481 00:35:46,644 --> 00:35:48,938 It's all right. It's all right. 482 00:35:48,980 --> 00:35:50,606 God... (laughing) 483 00:35:50,648 --> 00:35:52,608 -Oh, God. -It's no laughing matter. 484 00:35:52,650 --> 00:35:54,277 All right. 485 00:35:54,318 --> 00:35:56,320 Wait a minute. Let's get this on you. 486 00:35:56,362 --> 00:35:57,947 It's all right. It's all right. 487 00:35:57,989 --> 00:36:01,033 (Gerry groaning, panting) 488 00:36:01,075 --> 00:36:03,161 Get your legs over. 489 00:36:05,288 --> 00:36:06,956 All right, come on. One at a time. 490 00:36:06,998 --> 00:36:08,457 (Gerry grunting) 491 00:36:08,499 --> 00:36:09,876 I could've been a goner. 492 00:36:09,917 --> 00:36:12,837 -Oh, shh. You're all right. -(shuts off water) 493 00:36:12,879 --> 00:36:15,840 -There. Oh. -(groans, pants) 494 00:36:15,882 --> 00:36:17,800 -There's no bath mat. -Oh. 495 00:36:17,842 --> 00:36:19,594 (Gerry breathing heavily) 496 00:36:19,635 --> 00:36:21,637 Every bath should have a rubber mat. 497 00:36:21,679 --> 00:36:23,055 I know. I know. 498 00:36:23,097 --> 00:36:24,974 Oh. Oh, you're all right. 499 00:36:25,016 --> 00:36:27,435 Come on, now. Steady. Steady. 500 00:36:27,476 --> 00:36:29,562 -Oh, you're shaking. -(grunts) 501 00:36:29,604 --> 00:36:33,149 -(continues breathing heavily) -Good man. Good man. 502 00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:34,483 Sorry. 503 00:36:34,525 --> 00:36:36,444 I didn't mean to laugh. 504 00:36:36,485 --> 00:36:38,529 ♪ ♪ 505 00:36:54,712 --> 00:36:56,589 -(groans softly) -You all right? 506 00:36:56,631 --> 00:36:58,299 Yeah, yeah. 507 00:37:02,470 --> 00:37:05,765 (cork squeaks, pops) 508 00:37:07,433 --> 00:37:08,809 GERRY: Oh, just pour away. 509 00:37:08,851 --> 00:37:11,354 -SERVER: Sure? -GERRY: I'm sure it's fine. 510 00:37:21,072 --> 00:37:22,615 Ah. 511 00:37:23,532 --> 00:37:25,618 -STELLA and SERVER: Thank you. -GERRY: Thanks. 512 00:37:27,245 --> 00:37:28,454 (Stella clears throat) 513 00:37:28,496 --> 00:37:31,624 Moderation in all things. 514 00:37:33,584 --> 00:37:36,337 -Especially moderation. -Moderation. 515 00:37:41,050 --> 00:37:42,760 Mm. 516 00:37:47,306 --> 00:37:48,808 (Gerry grunts softly) 517 00:37:53,562 --> 00:37:56,399 There's something I'd like to talk to you about. 518 00:38:04,532 --> 00:38:08,577 Gerry, I'm tired of living the way we do. 519 00:38:08,619 --> 00:38:11,580 -(scoffs) -I keep... 520 00:38:11,622 --> 00:38:15,251 I keep f-feeling at a loose end, 521 00:38:15,293 --> 00:38:17,128 you know, at home. 522 00:38:17,169 --> 00:38:20,548 What with Michael gone, and-and it doesn't sound like 523 00:38:20,589 --> 00:38:22,842 there's going to be any more grandchildren. 524 00:38:24,218 --> 00:38:26,429 What's my role? 525 00:38:33,811 --> 00:38:37,982 What if we've cut the cloth of our lives all wrong? 526 00:38:40,484 --> 00:38:42,945 There's too... 527 00:38:42,987 --> 00:38:45,906 great a sense of drift. 528 00:38:49,577 --> 00:38:52,496 And I keep thinking... I... 529 00:38:54,915 --> 00:38:57,918 I keep thinking, Gerry, that I-I... 530 00:38:59,587 --> 00:39:01,630 I want to do something better. 531 00:39:01,672 --> 00:39:03,382 What do you mean, better? 532 00:39:03,424 --> 00:39:05,384 Better in what way? 533 00:39:06,761 --> 00:39:09,847 I want to live a more devout life. 534 00:39:10,681 --> 00:39:12,892 It's an unfashionable word nowadays, I know. 535 00:39:12,933 --> 00:39:14,643 Well, there's nothing wrong with you, is there? 536 00:39:14,685 --> 00:39:16,854 Not in any physical sense, no. 537 00:39:16,896 --> 00:39:18,856 No, no, yes, but hang on a minute, Stella. 538 00:39:18,898 --> 00:39:21,192 -Just hang on. No, it... -No, no, no, there's nothing 539 00:39:21,233 --> 00:39:22,318 wrong with me. 540 00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:24,862 Gerry, calm yourself. No. 541 00:39:25,863 --> 00:39:26,906 (Stella sighs) 542 00:39:26,947 --> 00:39:31,494 But I'd like to make an appointment. 543 00:39:31,535 --> 00:39:34,038 You know, the place we... we visited this morning. 544 00:39:34,080 --> 00:39:35,831 Just to speak to someone. 545 00:39:35,873 --> 00:39:39,168 I mean, the talk was that it's a good place 546 00:39:39,210 --> 00:39:43,339 for women like me who want to live a more religious life. 547 00:39:43,381 --> 00:39:47,009 A-A community of like-minded women 548 00:39:47,051 --> 00:39:50,388 interested in-in exploring the big questions. 549 00:39:50,429 --> 00:39:53,099 And there's somebody in there with all the answers, is there? 550 00:39:58,896 --> 00:40:01,065 These are questions that you have to answer 551 00:40:01,107 --> 00:40:02,942 for yourself, Gerry. 552 00:40:05,611 --> 00:40:08,114 (Gerry scoffs, chuckles) 553 00:40:08,155 --> 00:40:10,908 We should order. I'm famished. 554 00:40:20,501 --> 00:40:22,753 (faucet running) 555 00:40:24,296 --> 00:40:26,090 (faucet stops) 556 00:40:39,437 --> 00:40:41,689 (Gerry continues brushing teeth) 557 00:40:46,777 --> 00:40:49,155 -(brushing stops) -(faucet running) 558 00:40:51,699 --> 00:40:53,617 (Gerry grunts softly) 559 00:40:59,540 --> 00:41:01,792 -(Gerry grunts) -(faucet stops) 560 00:41:08,257 --> 00:41:10,259 Did you take your statins? 561 00:41:10,301 --> 00:41:11,719 Yeah. 562 00:41:17,558 --> 00:41:20,811 (both sighing) 563 00:41:39,330 --> 00:41:42,541 (Gerry sighs, grunts) 564 00:41:50,508 --> 00:41:52,468 (birds squawking) 565 00:41:52,510 --> 00:41:54,720 ♪ ♪ 566 00:42:12,363 --> 00:42:14,615 ♪ ♪ 567 00:42:22,748 --> 00:42:24,667 (Gerry sighs softly) 568 00:42:24,708 --> 00:42:26,919 (quiet chatter) 569 00:42:39,431 --> 00:42:41,016 Thank you. 570 00:42:51,777 --> 00:42:53,571 (Gerry clears throat) 571 00:42:58,450 --> 00:43:00,828 Uh, are you, um... 572 00:43:02,621 --> 00:43:04,873 ...any... 573 00:43:04,915 --> 00:43:09,712 easier in your mind about yesterday? 574 00:43:19,138 --> 00:43:23,809 See, I'm trying to remember what was said. 575 00:43:33,861 --> 00:43:36,822 Unlucky with the weather, haven't we? 576 00:43:47,082 --> 00:43:49,793 -Stella. -Let's eat. We should eat. 577 00:43:53,797 --> 00:43:56,050 (bells chiming) 578 00:44:01,722 --> 00:44:03,682 (bicycle bell dings) 579 00:44:05,434 --> 00:44:06,977 (Gerry grunts softly) 580 00:44:08,187 --> 00:44:10,147 (bicycle bell dinging) 581 00:44:20,658 --> 00:44:22,910 Oh, she's thought of everything. 582 00:44:27,539 --> 00:44:29,833 (quiet chatter) 583 00:44:32,252 --> 00:44:34,338 ♪ ♪ 584 00:44:56,360 --> 00:44:58,404 ♪ ♪ 585 00:45:21,385 --> 00:45:23,470 ♪ ♪ 586 00:45:41,196 --> 00:45:43,240 ♪ ♪ 587 00:46:03,218 --> 00:46:05,262 ♪ ♪ 588 00:46:24,531 --> 00:46:26,784 ♪ ♪ 589 00:46:48,847 --> 00:46:51,141 ♪ ♪ 590 00:46:54,394 --> 00:46:57,356 (espresso machine steam wand hissing) 591 00:46:59,441 --> 00:47:01,235 What is it, love? 592 00:47:03,946 --> 00:47:06,198 Do you remember Schindler's List? 593 00:47:07,241 --> 00:47:09,243 At the end? 594 00:47:09,284 --> 00:47:12,621 The pebbles on the gravestones, the little tokens? 595 00:47:12,663 --> 00:47:16,917 I noticed something similar at the end, on the wee shelf. 596 00:47:19,503 --> 00:47:22,965 I used to do that book with so many classes in school. 597 00:47:23,006 --> 00:47:25,843 And so I thought... (chuckling) 598 00:47:27,886 --> 00:47:30,347 I thought, "Why don't I leave something?" 599 00:47:31,181 --> 00:47:32,641 Yeah, and what's wrong with that? 600 00:47:32,683 --> 00:47:33,892 Oh, it's stupid. 601 00:47:33,934 --> 00:47:35,811 -Says who? -I've no right. 602 00:47:35,853 --> 00:47:38,772 Why? It's a perfectly legitimate gesture. 603 00:47:38,814 --> 00:47:40,399 No, it's shameful is what it is. 604 00:47:40,440 --> 00:47:43,026 -I'm not even Jewish. -Ah, come on, Stella. 605 00:47:43,068 --> 00:47:45,988 Don't take things so seriously. 606 00:47:46,029 --> 00:47:48,198 Gerry, if you can't take the Holocaust seriously... 607 00:47:48,240 --> 00:47:49,867 You know what I mean, right? 608 00:47:49,908 --> 00:47:52,202 You felt something, right? You took action. 609 00:47:52,244 --> 00:47:55,038 -You did a thoughtful thing. -No. No. 610 00:47:55,080 --> 00:47:58,667 I did a selfish thing to make myself feel better. 611 00:47:58,709 --> 00:48:00,586 There's a difference. 612 00:48:02,087 --> 00:48:06,341 Why is anything spiritual so impossible for you to grasp? 613 00:48:10,721 --> 00:48:12,556 Cake? 614 00:48:14,349 --> 00:48:15,934 Cake? 615 00:48:23,233 --> 00:48:24,985 (sighs) 616 00:48:26,236 --> 00:48:28,030 ♪ ♪ 617 00:48:28,071 --> 00:48:30,240 (birds chirping) 618 00:48:42,544 --> 00:48:44,588 (breathing deeply) 619 00:49:03,231 --> 00:49:04,608 BARMAN AIDAN: How you doing? 620 00:49:04,650 --> 00:49:06,401 GERRY: Pint of stout. Thanks. 621 00:49:06,443 --> 00:49:08,070 And a... 622 00:49:08,111 --> 00:49:10,739 ("Sideways to the Sun" by Horslips playing quietly) 623 00:49:10,781 --> 00:49:13,241 ...large whiskey, no ice. 624 00:49:17,537 --> 00:49:19,373 (drink pouring) 625 00:49:26,588 --> 00:49:29,299 (breathing deeply) 626 00:49:36,765 --> 00:49:39,601 Are you, uh, from Derry? 627 00:49:39,643 --> 00:49:41,311 -Donegal? -Derry. 628 00:49:41,353 --> 00:49:43,814 GERRY: Ah. I studied there for a while. 629 00:49:43,855 --> 00:49:45,315 -Magee College. -Oh, yeah? 630 00:49:45,357 --> 00:49:48,110 Yeah. A bit before your time, obviously. 631 00:49:48,151 --> 00:49:49,611 Don't tell me. 632 00:49:49,653 --> 00:49:51,613 Accountant? 633 00:49:51,655 --> 00:49:53,782 Architect. 634 00:49:53,824 --> 00:49:54,992 Same again? 635 00:49:55,033 --> 00:49:56,952 ♪ To play old airs ♪ 636 00:49:56,994 --> 00:49:59,955 ♪ We said we could be friends... ♪ 637 00:49:59,997 --> 00:50:03,291 GERRY: Graduated in the mid-'70s, 638 00:50:03,333 --> 00:50:06,670 and then as luck would have it, Liam McCormick took me on. 639 00:50:09,131 --> 00:50:12,509 He was a big architect in Belfast back then. 640 00:50:13,844 --> 00:50:19,808 And then they burnt the entire bloody place to the ground. 641 00:50:19,850 --> 00:50:21,643 Petrol bomb. 642 00:50:21,685 --> 00:50:23,770 No one was killed, thank God. 643 00:50:25,063 --> 00:50:28,650 Aye, but all that work, though, you know? 644 00:50:28,692 --> 00:50:32,112 Years and years of hard work up in smoke. 645 00:50:32,154 --> 00:50:34,656 Ireland's fight for fucking freedom. 646 00:50:34,698 --> 00:50:37,701 It wasn't long after that that we left. 647 00:50:37,743 --> 00:50:39,119 To? 648 00:50:39,161 --> 00:50:40,996 (sucks teeth) Glasgow. 649 00:50:41,038 --> 00:50:42,372 Miss it much? 650 00:50:43,707 --> 00:50:44,833 Work? 651 00:50:44,875 --> 00:50:46,585 Home. 652 00:50:48,587 --> 00:50:50,756 ♪ ♪ 653 00:50:50,797 --> 00:50:53,008 You know, um... 654 00:50:53,050 --> 00:50:58,138 we used to have these scale models. 655 00:51:01,349 --> 00:51:04,478 There was, uh, cars the size of Dinky Toys. 656 00:51:04,519 --> 00:51:09,357 Trees as small as those little cotton buds. 657 00:51:09,399 --> 00:51:10,901 You know? 658 00:51:10,942 --> 00:51:12,944 Tiny figurines. 659 00:51:12,986 --> 00:51:17,532 Mini churches, libraries, streets. 660 00:51:17,574 --> 00:51:20,410 Windows were made out of cellophane. 661 00:51:21,244 --> 00:51:23,413 They were minuscule. 662 00:51:32,339 --> 00:51:35,467 They were dis-architects, those fellas. 663 00:51:37,719 --> 00:51:42,349 The end of human decency, in the name of religion. 664 00:51:46,770 --> 00:51:48,355 I can still smell it. 665 00:51:50,273 --> 00:51:52,275 The black char. 666 00:51:57,697 --> 00:51:59,616 (drink pouring from tap) 667 00:52:03,912 --> 00:52:08,291 Yes, they certainly leveled my career, anyway. 668 00:52:09,459 --> 00:52:11,878 Strictly third division after that. 669 00:52:11,920 --> 00:52:14,297 ("The Old Rustic Bridge" by Big Tom and the Mainliners playing) 670 00:52:14,339 --> 00:52:17,259 -That was on a good day. -Hmm. 671 00:52:19,136 --> 00:52:23,306 Ah, would you look at the dome on that. 672 00:52:24,516 --> 00:52:25,559 (chuckles) 673 00:52:25,600 --> 00:52:28,854 Norman Foster, eat your heart out. 674 00:52:28,895 --> 00:52:30,647 (chuckles) 675 00:52:34,943 --> 00:52:37,612 ♪ Though now far away ♪ 676 00:52:37,654 --> 00:52:41,867 ♪ Still my thoughts fondly stray ♪ 677 00:52:41,908 --> 00:52:46,580 ♪ To the old rustic bridge by the mill... ♪ 678 00:52:46,621 --> 00:52:49,207 Taste... 679 00:52:49,249 --> 00:52:51,626 texture, temperature, perfect. 680 00:52:51,668 --> 00:52:53,378 (chuckles softly) 681 00:52:56,006 --> 00:52:58,633 Some people say the black stuff transforms you, 682 00:52:58,675 --> 00:53:00,760 you know, brings out the worst in you. 683 00:53:00,802 --> 00:53:02,387 Not me. 684 00:53:03,346 --> 00:53:05,682 -I love people. -(chuckles softly) 685 00:53:05,724 --> 00:53:08,101 I've always loved people. I'm a people person. 686 00:53:08,143 --> 00:53:10,437 (both chuckling) 687 00:53:13,064 --> 00:53:15,859 (lively chatter and laughter outside) 688 00:53:34,711 --> 00:53:36,796 ♪ ♪ 689 00:53:52,812 --> 00:53:54,064 Stella. 690 00:53:54,105 --> 00:53:56,524 Do you know what I'd like to do tonight? 691 00:53:56,566 --> 00:53:57,859 What? 692 00:53:57,901 --> 00:53:59,694 Something fun. 693 00:54:01,196 --> 00:54:03,031 (lively chatter) 694 00:54:03,073 --> 00:54:06,117 GERRY: The railwaymen would leave their burning lanterns 695 00:54:06,159 --> 00:54:08,036 outside the bordello doors. 696 00:54:08,078 --> 00:54:09,746 Red lanterns. 697 00:54:09,788 --> 00:54:12,582 -Red-light district. -STELLA: Charming. 698 00:54:14,125 --> 00:54:15,752 Oh. 699 00:54:18,588 --> 00:54:21,216 I hesitate to say what turns me on, 700 00:54:21,258 --> 00:54:23,426 but this certainly isn't it. 701 00:54:23,468 --> 00:54:26,137 I just feel so sorry for them. 702 00:54:26,179 --> 00:54:27,430 Aye. 703 00:54:27,472 --> 00:54:29,099 The lighting is awful. 704 00:54:29,140 --> 00:54:30,183 (chuckles) I know. 705 00:54:30,225 --> 00:54:31,851 That's UV lighting. 706 00:54:31,893 --> 00:54:34,854 The same thing the butchers used to use to kill the flies. 707 00:54:34,896 --> 00:54:35,981 (both laughing) 708 00:54:36,022 --> 00:54:37,232 I know. 709 00:54:37,274 --> 00:54:39,651 ("Uit M'n Bol" by André Hazes playing) 710 00:54:39,693 --> 00:54:42,779 (song continues with singing in Dutch) 711 00:54:47,158 --> 00:54:49,411 GERRY: An ant could piss more. 712 00:54:49,452 --> 00:54:52,414 Before you English had gin, we had jenever. 713 00:54:52,455 --> 00:54:53,581 I'm not English. 714 00:54:53,623 --> 00:54:55,625 With a beer, it's very good. 715 00:54:57,585 --> 00:54:59,838 (conversation continues indistinctly) 716 00:55:08,680 --> 00:55:10,348 Here we go. 717 00:55:10,390 --> 00:55:12,100 -There. -Oh. 718 00:55:12,142 --> 00:55:13,226 What are we drinking? 719 00:55:13,268 --> 00:55:14,686 -Jenever. -What? 720 00:55:14,728 --> 00:55:16,021 Jenever. 721 00:55:16,062 --> 00:55:18,940 First you drink the beer, then you drink the, uh... 722 00:55:18,982 --> 00:55:20,191 -Jenever? -Jenever. 723 00:55:20,233 --> 00:55:21,985 -Ha. -Cheers. 724 00:55:22,027 --> 00:55:23,528 Cheers. 725 00:55:35,123 --> 00:55:36,666 Ah. 726 00:55:39,252 --> 00:55:41,129 -(sets glass down) -(Stella exhales) 727 00:55:41,171 --> 00:55:43,923 (laughing): Holy Mary, Mother of God. 728 00:55:43,965 --> 00:55:45,925 (both laughing) 729 00:55:52,015 --> 00:55:53,850 Same again? 730 00:55:54,976 --> 00:55:56,853 (Stella laughing) 731 00:56:06,863 --> 00:56:09,699 What bliss to be away from all that noise. 732 00:56:09,741 --> 00:56:10,867 Aye. 733 00:56:10,909 --> 00:56:13,078 (Stella laughing) 734 00:56:13,119 --> 00:56:15,955 (bell tolling) 735 00:56:15,997 --> 00:56:17,832 -(gasps) Gerry. -Huh? 736 00:56:19,542 --> 00:56:21,544 STELLA: Look. 737 00:56:26,966 --> 00:56:28,551 Come on. 738 00:56:28,593 --> 00:56:30,804 (horse huffing softly) 739 00:56:30,845 --> 00:56:32,889 ♪ ♪ 740 00:56:48,738 --> 00:56:51,032 (horse huffing softly) 741 00:56:54,953 --> 00:56:56,996 Oh, you're beautiful. 742 00:57:03,878 --> 00:57:06,089 ♪ ♪ 743 00:57:19,394 --> 00:57:21,646 ♪ ♪ 744 00:57:36,578 --> 00:57:37,745 (Stella chuckles) 745 00:57:37,787 --> 00:57:39,956 -(bells chiming) -(birds squawking) 746 00:57:45,628 --> 00:57:47,922 (rustling in other room) 747 00:58:04,814 --> 00:58:07,066 -(Gerry sighs) -Morning. 748 00:58:11,029 --> 00:58:13,281 What's that for? 749 00:58:13,323 --> 00:58:15,617 Body. 750 00:58:15,658 --> 00:58:17,535 Think it would do anything for my body? 751 00:58:17,577 --> 00:58:19,662 (Stella grunts softly) 752 00:58:19,704 --> 00:58:21,206 What's the occasion? 753 00:58:21,247 --> 00:58:24,250 Oh, thought I'd go back to the Begijnhof again. 754 00:58:24,292 --> 00:58:26,544 The vomiting miracle place? 755 00:58:28,004 --> 00:58:31,174 Uh, d-do you want me to go with you? 756 00:58:32,550 --> 00:58:34,594 No, thank you. Mm. 757 00:58:37,514 --> 00:58:39,807 ♪ ♪ 758 00:58:57,200 --> 00:58:58,743 STELLA: Oh. 759 00:58:59,536 --> 00:59:01,371 (clears throat) 760 00:59:01,412 --> 00:59:02,872 Good morning. 761 00:59:02,914 --> 00:59:04,749 I wonder if you could help me. 762 00:59:04,791 --> 00:59:07,835 (Hennie speaking Dutch) 763 00:59:07,877 --> 00:59:08,836 Oh. 764 00:59:08,878 --> 00:59:10,880 Thank you. (clears throat) 765 00:59:10,922 --> 00:59:13,550 (typing) 766 00:59:16,553 --> 00:59:18,805 (quiet chatter) 767 00:59:29,566 --> 00:59:31,901 (breathing deeply) 768 00:59:36,322 --> 00:59:37,865 Excuse me. 769 00:59:37,907 --> 00:59:40,910 Excuse me. Uh, uh, I have a plane to catch. 770 00:59:40,952 --> 00:59:42,328 -A flight. -Please sit. 771 00:59:42,370 --> 00:59:43,830 No, no. (stammers) 772 00:59:43,871 --> 00:59:45,957 -Is there anyone else that I... -Hello again. 773 00:59:45,999 --> 00:59:47,959 -Oh, hello. -(both chuckling) 774 00:59:48,001 --> 00:59:50,920 -Um... Sorry, just... -Oh, sorry. No, no, no. 775 00:59:50,962 --> 00:59:53,756 (Kathy and Hennie conversing in Dutch) 776 00:59:58,678 --> 01:00:00,680 -Hi. Um... -Hi. 777 01:00:00,722 --> 01:00:03,766 I'm sorry. Hennie is very busy right now. 778 01:00:04,642 --> 01:00:07,770 But maybe I can help you with something? 779 01:00:08,771 --> 01:00:10,648 That would be lovely, yeah. 780 01:00:11,774 --> 01:00:13,568 My house is just down there. 781 01:00:13,610 --> 01:00:15,278 Right. 782 01:00:15,320 --> 01:00:16,779 (sighs) 783 01:00:17,864 --> 01:00:19,907 The gardens are so beautifully kept. 784 01:00:19,949 --> 01:00:21,576 KATHY (chuckling): Yeah. 785 01:00:21,618 --> 01:00:23,244 In the summer, they're extraordinary. 786 01:00:23,286 --> 01:00:27,040 Especially in the evenings, with the night-scented stock. 787 01:00:27,081 --> 01:00:29,125 Oh. 788 01:00:29,167 --> 01:00:30,627 It's so quiet. 789 01:00:30,668 --> 01:00:33,004 KATHY: It's a meter lower than the outside world. 790 01:00:33,046 --> 01:00:35,798 The noise goes over its head somehow. 791 01:00:37,592 --> 01:00:39,052 This is me here. 792 01:00:39,093 --> 01:00:40,637 Oh. 793 01:00:43,389 --> 01:00:45,058 (Stella chuckles) 794 01:00:46,809 --> 01:00:49,312 (lock clicking) 795 01:00:50,647 --> 01:00:52,607 (traffic light clicking rapidly) 796 01:00:52,649 --> 01:00:54,901 ♪ ♪ 797 01:00:58,738 --> 01:01:01,282 Stairway to heaven. 798 01:01:01,324 --> 01:01:04,452 The only disadvantage is when you want a grand piano. 799 01:01:04,494 --> 01:01:06,788 Maybe stick to the violin. 800 01:01:06,829 --> 01:01:09,165 (Kathy chuckling) 801 01:01:09,207 --> 01:01:11,709 Oh, it's lovely. 802 01:01:12,710 --> 01:01:14,295 Minimalist. 803 01:01:14,337 --> 01:01:16,255 Sit yourself down. I'll make us some tea. 804 01:01:16,297 --> 01:01:18,007 Thank you. 805 01:01:34,357 --> 01:01:37,860 ("Something in the Air" by Thunderclap Newman playing) 806 01:01:42,115 --> 01:01:46,577 ♪ Lock up the streets and houses ♪ 807 01:01:46,619 --> 01:01:51,749 ♪ Because there's something in the air ♪ 808 01:01:51,791 --> 01:01:57,004 ♪ We've got to get together sooner or later ♪ 809 01:01:57,046 --> 01:02:01,509 ♪ Because the revolution's here ♪ 810 01:02:01,551 --> 01:02:04,846 ♪ And you know it's right ♪ 811 01:02:09,600 --> 01:02:12,729 ♪ And you know that it's right... ♪ 812 01:02:12,770 --> 01:02:14,605 KATHY: So, what can I do for you, Stella? 813 01:02:14,647 --> 01:02:16,524 STELLA: Well, um... 814 01:02:16,566 --> 01:02:18,359 Oh, do you need sugar? 815 01:02:18,401 --> 01:02:21,112 -Uh, no, thank you. -Oh. 816 01:02:21,154 --> 01:02:23,281 I suppose I just wanted to make an inquiry. 817 01:02:23,322 --> 01:02:27,577 I was in Amsterdam some 30-odd years ago. 818 01:02:27,618 --> 01:02:28,661 KATHY: Mm-hmm? 819 01:02:28,703 --> 01:02:30,663 Teacher training conference. 820 01:02:30,705 --> 01:02:31,831 Are you a teacher, Stella? 821 01:02:31,873 --> 01:02:33,207 -I was. -Me, too. 822 01:02:33,249 --> 01:02:34,876 Oh. (laughs) 823 01:02:34,917 --> 01:02:37,837 For years, I was an Irishwoman living in Scotland 824 01:02:37,879 --> 01:02:39,672 teaching English. 825 01:02:39,714 --> 01:02:41,132 An Irishwoman in the Netherlands 826 01:02:41,174 --> 01:02:43,384 teaching comparative religion and maths. 827 01:02:43,426 --> 01:02:46,095 (chuckling): Oh. Right. 828 01:02:46,137 --> 01:02:48,765 Well, that was when I first heard about it. 829 01:02:48,806 --> 01:02:51,184 You know, the setup here. 830 01:02:51,225 --> 01:02:52,268 Ah... 831 01:02:53,269 --> 01:02:58,900 But back then, uh, there was no urgency. 832 01:02:58,941 --> 01:03:00,902 What's the urgency now? 833 01:03:05,281 --> 01:03:09,285 I want to live a more valuable life, Kathy. 834 01:03:10,787 --> 01:03:13,414 To make a contribution. 835 01:03:13,456 --> 01:03:15,625 However small. 836 01:03:15,666 --> 01:03:18,586 You know, so... 837 01:03:18,628 --> 01:03:21,047 I suppose, really, 838 01:03:21,088 --> 01:03:26,052 I just wanted to find out about the life here, you know. 839 01:03:26,093 --> 01:03:30,097 How someone like me might go about applying 840 01:03:30,139 --> 01:03:31,766 to become part of this. 841 01:03:31,808 --> 01:03:33,434 This? 842 01:03:33,476 --> 01:03:35,770 The order. 843 01:03:35,812 --> 01:03:37,313 The sisterhood. 844 01:03:38,481 --> 01:03:40,858 (sighs) Stella, I don't know where you've been getting 845 01:03:40,900 --> 01:03:43,945 your information from, but... 846 01:03:43,986 --> 01:03:46,697 there's no religious order now. 847 01:03:46,739 --> 01:03:48,407 Not anymore. 848 01:03:48,449 --> 01:03:51,410 There hasn't been a sister living here since 1971. 849 01:03:51,452 --> 01:03:52,870 (stammers softly) 850 01:03:52,912 --> 01:03:54,288 What is there? 851 01:03:54,330 --> 01:03:57,333 Affordable living for anyone who can afford it. 852 01:04:00,711 --> 01:04:02,964 (stammers softly) 853 01:04:03,005 --> 01:04:06,133 So the sisterhood is a figment of my imagination? 854 01:04:06,175 --> 01:04:09,220 No. The sisterhood is real. 855 01:04:10,054 --> 01:04:13,140 But the religious aspect... 856 01:04:13,182 --> 01:04:16,936 the religious aspect has all but disappeared. 857 01:04:18,187 --> 01:04:20,523 So I've got this all wrong. 858 01:04:21,566 --> 01:04:24,569 It's possible still for women to live here. 859 01:04:25,486 --> 01:04:27,655 The only criteria is that you must be prepared 860 01:04:27,697 --> 01:04:30,032 to live by yourself. 861 01:04:30,074 --> 01:04:33,536 Older than 30, younger than 65. 862 01:04:34,704 --> 01:04:36,497 That rules me out, then. 863 01:04:36,539 --> 01:04:38,499 Oh, no. 864 01:04:38,541 --> 01:04:40,167 I don't believe it. 865 01:04:41,711 --> 01:04:45,214 The other hitch is that I'm married. 866 01:04:45,256 --> 01:04:46,757 (sighs) 867 01:04:46,799 --> 01:04:51,971 Though I'm not sure how much marriage we've got left in us. 868 01:04:54,223 --> 01:04:56,517 ("Something in the Air" continues) 869 01:05:11,073 --> 01:05:13,409 ♪ Lock up the streets... ♪ 870 01:05:13,451 --> 01:05:15,411 Can I ask you... 871 01:05:17,788 --> 01:05:19,582 Are-are you... 872 01:05:22,460 --> 01:05:24,378 A Catholic? 873 01:05:25,755 --> 01:05:27,715 Right. 874 01:05:27,757 --> 01:05:29,175 Do you still practice? 875 01:05:29,216 --> 01:05:33,346 You know, prayer and so forth? 876 01:05:33,387 --> 01:05:35,139 (chuckles softly) 877 01:05:45,316 --> 01:05:48,945 Kathy, I... I want to tell you something. 878 01:05:50,696 --> 01:05:54,158 (chuckling): It-it's something I've never really told anyone. 879 01:05:59,914 --> 01:06:03,125 I was involved in an accident. 880 01:06:03,167 --> 01:06:05,378 This was years ago. 881 01:06:07,171 --> 01:06:13,135 It was our first summer together as husband and wife. 882 01:06:14,595 --> 01:06:15,763 I was pregnant. 883 01:06:15,805 --> 01:06:19,350 I mean, very, very, heavily pregnant. 884 01:06:21,644 --> 01:06:24,146 It was unseasonably hot. 885 01:06:25,356 --> 01:06:28,359 Uh, too hot for tights, anyway. (chuckles) 886 01:06:32,488 --> 01:06:36,575 Somebody was ambushing somebody else. 887 01:06:38,619 --> 01:06:42,623 I'm not sure how long I'd been running for, 888 01:06:42,665 --> 01:06:46,043 but all of a sudden, running became falling, 889 01:06:46,085 --> 01:06:49,505 and falling became... 890 01:06:49,547 --> 01:06:51,382 not moving. 891 01:06:52,883 --> 01:06:54,760 Sprawled. 892 01:06:58,848 --> 01:07:00,975 At first, 893 01:07:01,017 --> 01:07:04,520 I worried that I'd wet myself. 894 01:07:05,855 --> 01:07:09,483 And then I-I thought, you know, it-it must be my-my waters. 895 01:07:09,525 --> 01:07:11,485 You know, my waters must have broken. 896 01:07:11,527 --> 01:07:14,071 -KATHY: Mm-hmm. -(Stella sniffles) 897 01:07:14,113 --> 01:07:17,199 But then, of course, I realized. 898 01:07:22,204 --> 01:07:24,373 So I said a prayer. 899 01:07:26,375 --> 01:07:29,545 As I lay there on the street not-not-not knowing 900 01:07:29,587 --> 01:07:32,590 one way or the other what was going to happen. 901 01:07:35,342 --> 01:07:38,554 (crying): I said the only prayer I could remember. 902 01:07:40,848 --> 01:07:44,018 As an act of contrition, and I-I knew that wasn't right. 903 01:07:44,060 --> 01:07:46,103 I knew that wasn't what I wanted. 904 01:07:46,145 --> 01:07:47,605 I mean, that's to save yourself. 905 01:07:47,646 --> 01:07:51,442 I knew that, and I wanted to save my baby. 906 01:07:53,152 --> 01:07:55,237 So I said... 907 01:07:59,992 --> 01:08:03,370 I said, "Lord... 908 01:08:03,412 --> 01:08:07,249 "spare the child inside my womb... 909 01:08:09,502 --> 01:08:13,839 ...and I will devote the rest of my life to you." 910 01:08:17,134 --> 01:08:20,304 "Lord, let my baby live, 911 01:08:20,346 --> 01:08:25,267 "and I will devote the rest of my life... 912 01:08:27,186 --> 01:08:29,146 ...to you." 913 01:08:37,613 --> 01:08:39,323 Now... 914 01:08:42,952 --> 01:08:45,246 ...either it was a miracle 915 01:08:45,287 --> 01:08:49,375 or, as Gerry would say, the wee one must have ducked, 916 01:08:49,416 --> 01:08:51,919 but the bullet passed right through me, 917 01:08:51,961 --> 01:08:54,338 in one side and out the other. 918 01:08:55,798 --> 01:08:57,383 The only damage was that 919 01:08:57,424 --> 01:09:00,261 I wouldn't be able to have any more children. 920 01:09:06,058 --> 01:09:09,728 But that vow... 921 01:09:09,770 --> 01:09:11,772 that pledge... 922 01:09:11,814 --> 01:09:14,441 Kathy, that bargain... 923 01:09:16,235 --> 01:09:18,529 ...there is a debt to be paid, 924 01:09:18,571 --> 01:09:23,200 and I've been looking for a way to pay it ever since. 925 01:09:28,622 --> 01:09:31,292 I've never breathed a word of this to-to anyone, 926 01:09:31,333 --> 01:09:33,252 not even to Gerry. 927 01:09:39,216 --> 01:09:41,802 (sobbing): But here I am... 928 01:09:43,262 --> 01:09:45,514 ...at my age, and... 929 01:09:50,853 --> 01:09:52,771 ...and I've failed. 930 01:09:57,359 --> 01:09:59,195 I'm a failure. 931 01:09:59,236 --> 01:10:01,655 (shuddering breaths) 932 01:10:02,948 --> 01:10:05,492 ("The 7 Last Words of Jesus Christ Sonata IV. Largo" plays) 933 01:10:23,844 --> 01:10:25,888 ♪ ♪ 934 01:10:45,241 --> 01:10:47,284 ♪ ♪ 935 01:11:07,096 --> 01:11:09,390 ♪ ♪ 936 01:11:12,726 --> 01:11:14,520 ♪ ♪ 937 01:11:19,775 --> 01:11:21,819 ♪ ♪ 938 01:11:25,072 --> 01:11:27,324 ♪ ♪ 939 01:11:40,421 --> 01:11:42,798 (breath trembling softly) 940 01:11:48,220 --> 01:11:49,972 (door opens) 941 01:11:50,014 --> 01:11:52,224 -(vehicle engine idling) -(vehicle door opens, closes) 942 01:11:52,266 --> 01:11:53,851 (hotel door closing) 943 01:11:53,892 --> 01:11:55,978 ♪ ♪ 944 01:12:12,494 --> 01:12:14,955 -(waves crashing) -(birds squawking) 945 01:12:26,884 --> 01:12:29,345 -(waves crashing) -(birds squawking) 946 01:12:32,056 --> 01:12:33,807 (camera shutter clicks) 947 01:12:51,367 --> 01:12:53,619 ♪ ♪ 948 01:12:56,914 --> 01:12:58,332 (music ends) 949 01:12:58,374 --> 01:13:01,502 You still haven't told me how your meeting went. 950 01:13:02,294 --> 01:13:04,004 No, I don't suppose I have. 951 01:13:04,046 --> 01:13:06,131 WOMAN (over P.A.): ...are ready for you to proceed 952 01:13:06,173 --> 01:13:08,467 to departure gate number 42. 953 01:13:17,226 --> 01:13:19,645 (electronic chiming over P.A.) 954 01:13:19,686 --> 01:13:21,480 MAN (over P.A.): If you see any unattended luggage 955 01:13:21,522 --> 01:13:23,357 or anything suspicious, please contact 956 01:13:23,399 --> 01:13:25,317 a member of staff immediately. 957 01:13:25,359 --> 01:13:26,860 (announcement continues in Dutch) 958 01:13:26,902 --> 01:13:29,279 (rummaging) 959 01:13:29,321 --> 01:13:30,948 (twists cap off bottle) 960 01:13:39,373 --> 01:13:41,583 (twists cap on bottle) 961 01:13:44,586 --> 01:13:46,171 (grunts softly) 962 01:13:59,226 --> 01:14:01,186 You'll do yourself damage. 963 01:14:02,646 --> 01:14:04,148 As if you would care. 964 01:14:07,443 --> 01:14:10,529 -Pardon? -You heard me. 965 01:14:10,571 --> 01:14:13,073 Oh, Jesus, give me peace. 966 01:14:21,081 --> 01:14:23,125 ♪ ♪ 967 01:14:33,343 --> 01:14:35,345 (electronic chiming over P.A.) 968 01:14:35,387 --> 01:14:37,639 (indistinct announcement over P.A.) 969 01:14:52,321 --> 01:14:54,781 -Oh, for God's sake. -Oh. 970 01:15:05,000 --> 01:15:06,960 ♪ ♪ 971 01:15:07,002 --> 01:15:09,087 (quiet chatter) 972 01:15:27,189 --> 01:15:28,774 Here. 973 01:15:40,494 --> 01:15:42,496 (Gerry grunts) 974 01:15:42,538 --> 01:15:44,248 (sighs) 975 01:15:55,300 --> 01:15:57,302 Gerry, when we get home... 976 01:16:00,722 --> 01:16:02,891 I'd like to put the flat up for sale, and... 977 01:16:02,933 --> 01:16:05,727 and then I want to get a place of my own. 978 01:16:16,863 --> 01:16:19,616 You'd be better off waiting till summer. 979 01:16:20,826 --> 01:16:23,537 More chance of getting a better price. 980 01:16:23,579 --> 01:16:26,081 Gerry, you're not listening to me. 981 01:16:29,960 --> 01:16:34,339 I can't go on living the way we do. 982 01:16:37,092 --> 01:16:38,218 I won't. 983 01:16:38,260 --> 01:16:41,346 (takes deep breath) 984 01:16:43,599 --> 01:16:45,726 I mean, the drinking. 985 01:16:47,436 --> 01:16:49,396 If I mention it, I'm a nag. 986 01:16:49,438 --> 01:16:52,149 If I don't, then I'm complicit. 987 01:16:54,568 --> 01:16:56,945 Do you not think I don't see it? 988 01:16:58,447 --> 01:16:59,948 Smell it? 989 01:17:02,909 --> 01:17:05,579 Yes, I suppose you could go on doing it behind my back 990 01:17:05,621 --> 01:17:07,497 until you've no liver left. 991 01:17:07,539 --> 01:17:09,374 (Gerry clears throat softly) 992 01:17:10,626 --> 01:17:13,086 But it's not just the drinking. 993 01:17:13,128 --> 01:17:16,965 It-it's the deception that goes along with it. 994 01:17:18,717 --> 01:17:20,636 It's ruining you. 995 01:17:24,056 --> 01:17:25,641 Says you. 996 01:17:26,558 --> 01:17:29,978 Well, it's ruining me, that's for sure. 997 01:17:30,771 --> 01:17:34,316 I wouldn't know about that. 998 01:17:36,610 --> 01:17:39,279 You used to be so considerate. 999 01:17:41,990 --> 01:17:43,992 What's happened to you? 1000 01:17:45,035 --> 01:17:47,954 These days, you're... you're nothing but appetite. 1001 01:17:47,996 --> 01:17:49,998 Okay. Fine, then. I'll stop, okay? 1002 01:17:50,040 --> 01:17:51,792 -Right? No, I will. I'll quit. -(sighs) 1003 01:17:51,833 --> 01:17:53,502 -Oh, Gerry. -No, look, I mean it. 1004 01:17:53,543 --> 01:17:56,296 (stammering): If you're serious about this, then I am, too. 1005 01:17:56,338 --> 01:17:58,632 -I've heard it all before. -(stammering): No, look. 1006 01:17:58,674 --> 01:18:00,008 I-I can do it, okay? 1007 01:18:00,050 --> 01:18:03,178 I... We can... I... (sighs) I can change. 1008 01:18:05,180 --> 01:18:08,100 I mean, I gave up the cigarettes, didn't I? 1009 01:18:09,101 --> 01:18:12,229 You think I don't know how to change? 1010 01:18:12,270 --> 01:18:14,147 Huh? 1011 01:18:14,189 --> 01:18:18,360 You think I-I don't know what this stuff is doing to me? 1012 01:18:18,402 --> 01:18:22,280 Sure, I hate myself as much as you do when I'm drinking. 1013 01:18:22,322 --> 01:18:25,951 Well, then, why in God's name do you put yourself through it? 1014 01:18:25,992 --> 01:18:30,372 Because I hate myself even more when I'm not. 1015 01:18:46,263 --> 01:18:48,932 What about my faith? 1016 01:18:48,974 --> 01:18:51,184 (sighs) What about it? 1017 01:18:51,226 --> 01:18:53,895 -We believe in different things. -So? 1018 01:18:54,688 --> 01:18:56,940 I mean, we've always known that. 1019 01:18:56,982 --> 01:18:59,359 But it's gotten so much worse, Gerry. 1020 01:18:59,401 --> 01:19:02,237 I mean... the mockery. 1021 01:19:02,279 --> 01:19:06,158 No, I have never mocked you, Stella. 1022 01:19:06,199 --> 01:19:08,869 Oh, well, if that's not mockery, then I don't know what is. 1023 01:19:08,910 --> 01:19:10,370 It's-it's a debate, right? 1024 01:19:10,412 --> 01:19:13,039 We're... No, we're talking about debating the... 1025 01:19:13,081 --> 01:19:16,960 the-the greatest deception that we've known 1026 01:19:17,002 --> 01:19:19,212 -in our entire lives. -No. No. 1027 01:19:19,254 --> 01:19:22,841 (voice shaking): We are talking about... 1028 01:19:25,010 --> 01:19:26,720 -...respect. -(scoffs) 1029 01:19:26,762 --> 01:19:27,888 Stella. 1030 01:19:27,929 --> 01:19:32,058 The joking and the poking fun and... 1031 01:19:32,100 --> 01:19:34,269 the derision and scorn. 1032 01:19:34,311 --> 01:19:35,937 I mean, it-it... 1033 01:19:37,481 --> 01:19:42,027 It's like you-you have no idea how much you hurt me and... 1034 01:19:42,068 --> 01:19:44,070 Or maybe you do and you just don't care anymore. 1035 01:19:44,112 --> 01:19:45,614 I'm not sure which is worse. 1036 01:19:45,655 --> 01:19:49,284 Surely, Stella, then I have to be allowed my truth. 1037 01:19:49,326 --> 01:19:50,452 The truth. 1038 01:19:50,494 --> 01:19:51,912 You're doing it again. 1039 01:19:51,953 --> 01:19:54,206 -You're dismissing me. -(stammers) 1040 01:19:55,332 --> 01:19:57,375 (Gerry sighs) 1041 01:20:02,339 --> 01:20:05,509 (crying): All I want is to feel close, you know? 1042 01:20:05,550 --> 01:20:07,552 It's too much. 1043 01:20:10,806 --> 01:20:12,474 (sniffles) 1044 01:20:12,516 --> 01:20:14,810 ♪ ♪ 1045 01:20:22,776 --> 01:20:25,028 ♪ ♪ 1046 01:20:30,909 --> 01:20:33,161 (quiet chatter) 1047 01:20:54,808 --> 01:20:57,018 (electronic chiming over P.A.) 1048 01:20:58,103 --> 01:21:00,021 WOMAN (over P.A.): Attention, all passengers 1049 01:21:00,063 --> 01:21:03,692 for flight BM1463 to Glasgow... 1050 01:21:03,733 --> 01:21:05,861 -(announcement fades) -(grunts softly) 1051 01:21:07,195 --> 01:21:09,406 It's still chucking it down. 1052 01:21:18,832 --> 01:21:20,959 Sweet, modom? 1053 01:21:31,469 --> 01:21:33,221 Stella. 1054 01:21:35,432 --> 01:21:37,100 Uh... 1055 01:21:38,810 --> 01:21:42,022 My being with you is 1056 01:21:42,063 --> 01:21:45,275 the most wonderful thing there is. 1057 01:21:48,278 --> 01:21:50,196 I adore you. 1058 01:21:51,406 --> 01:21:55,577 And when I think of the future, all I think about is you. 1059 01:21:57,495 --> 01:22:00,165 And I wish I had been there with you in Belfast, 1060 01:22:00,206 --> 01:22:02,375 and I know that I'll never be able to share 1061 01:22:02,417 --> 01:22:05,170 in what happened to you that day. 1062 01:22:08,298 --> 01:22:10,258 But, um... 1063 01:22:14,012 --> 01:22:17,307 I-I-I won't ever... 1064 01:22:17,349 --> 01:22:20,727 be able to accept your version of events, 1065 01:22:20,769 --> 01:22:24,773 and I'll tell you why. 1066 01:22:24,814 --> 01:22:27,901 Because... 1067 01:22:27,943 --> 01:22:33,573 passing through this world beside you, 1068 01:22:33,615 --> 01:22:37,118 that's the real miracle. 1069 01:22:44,125 --> 01:22:46,252 The miracle is you. 1070 01:22:48,922 --> 01:22:51,007 (sighs softly) 1071 01:23:11,403 --> 01:23:12,696 Uh... 1072 01:23:25,834 --> 01:23:28,086 ♪ ♪ 1073 01:23:52,610 --> 01:23:54,195 Look. 1074 01:23:56,531 --> 01:23:58,199 Is that a plane? 1075 01:24:16,217 --> 01:24:18,261 STELLA: It's not moving. 1076 01:24:22,390 --> 01:24:25,060 I think it's the morning star. 1077 01:24:32,942 --> 01:24:35,278 Do you think we'll ever get away? 1078 01:24:36,738 --> 01:24:38,364 (Stella chuckles softly) 1079 01:24:40,742 --> 01:24:43,369 We can only hope. 1080 01:24:43,411 --> 01:24:45,497 ♪ ♪ 1081 01:25:02,931 --> 01:25:05,183 ♪ ♪ 1082 01:25:19,948 --> 01:25:22,200 ♪ ♪ 1083 01:25:35,797 --> 01:25:39,300 ("This Time Tomorrow" by The Kinks playing) 1084 01:25:44,472 --> 01:25:48,309 ♪ This time tomorrow ♪ 1085 01:25:48,351 --> 01:25:52,105 ♪ Where will we be? ♪ 1086 01:25:52,147 --> 01:25:55,942 ♪ On a spaceship somewhere ♪ 1087 01:25:55,984 --> 01:26:02,949 ♪ Sailing across an empty sea ♪ 1088 01:26:02,991 --> 01:26:06,828 ♪ This time tomorrow ♪ 1089 01:26:06,870 --> 01:26:11,040 ♪ What will we know? ♪ 1090 01:26:11,082 --> 01:26:14,544 ♪ Will we still be here ♪ 1091 01:26:14,586 --> 01:26:20,550 ♪ Watching an in-flight movie show? ♪ 1092 01:26:20,592 --> 01:26:24,345 ♪ I'll leave the sun behind me ♪ 1093 01:26:24,387 --> 01:26:26,347 ♪ And I'll watch the clouds ♪ 1094 01:26:26,389 --> 01:26:31,186 ♪ As they sadly pass me by ♪ 1095 01:26:31,227 --> 01:26:34,230 ♪ Seven miles below me ♪ 1096 01:26:34,272 --> 01:26:36,232 ♪ I can see the world ♪ 1097 01:26:36,274 --> 01:26:41,988 ♪ And it ain't so big at all ♪ 1098 01:26:42,030 --> 01:26:47,076 ♪ Well, this time tomorrow ♪ 1099 01:26:47,118 --> 01:26:50,830 ♪ What will we see? ♪ 1100 01:26:50,872 --> 01:26:54,542 ♪ Fields full of houses ♪ 1101 01:26:54,584 --> 01:27:01,257 ♪ Endless rows of crowded streets ♪ 1102 01:27:01,299 --> 01:27:05,011 ♪ I don't know where I'm going ♪ 1103 01:27:05,053 --> 01:27:09,140 ♪ I don't want to see ♪ 1104 01:27:09,182 --> 01:27:12,518 ♪ I feel the world below me ♪ 1105 01:27:12,560 --> 01:27:15,355 -♪ Looking up ♪ -♪ Looking up, looking up ♪ 1106 01:27:15,396 --> 01:27:20,526 ♪ Looking up at me ♪ 1107 01:27:36,084 --> 01:27:39,212 ♪ Leave the sun behind me ♪ 1108 01:27:39,254 --> 01:27:41,214 ♪ And I'll watch the clouds ♪ 1109 01:27:41,256 --> 01:27:44,717 ♪ As they sadly pass me by ♪ 1110 01:27:44,759 --> 01:27:49,013 ♪ And I'm in perpetual motion ♪ 1111 01:27:49,055 --> 01:27:50,932 ♪ And the world below ♪ 1112 01:27:50,974 --> 01:27:56,104 ♪ Doesn't matter much to me ♪ 1113 01:27:56,145 --> 01:28:01,484 ♪ Well, this time tomorrow ♪ 1114 01:28:01,526 --> 01:28:05,113 ♪ Where will we be? ♪ 1115 01:28:05,154 --> 01:28:08,741 ♪ On a spaceship somewhere ♪ 1116 01:28:08,783 --> 01:28:14,956 ♪ Sailing across an empty sea ♪ 1117 01:28:14,998 --> 01:28:20,295 ♪ Well, this time tomorrow ♪ 1118 01:28:23,631 --> 01:28:27,427 ♪ This time tomorrow ♪ 1119 01:28:27,468 --> 01:28:31,306 ♪ Where will we be? ♪ 1120 01:28:40,982 --> 01:28:42,942 (song ends) 1121 01:28:42,984 --> 01:28:45,028 ♪ ♪ 1122 01:29:15,016 --> 01:29:17,060 ♪ ♪ 1123 01:29:47,048 --> 01:29:49,092 ♪ ♪ 1124 01:30:19,080 --> 01:30:21,124 ♪ ♪ 1125 01:30:40,268 --> 01:30:42,478 (music fades)