2 00:07:21,540 --> 00:07:24,160 I think you feel nice Claudia. 3 00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:25,980 I really think it will. 4 00:07:25,980 --> 00:07:27,540 Fix you right up. 5 00:07:29,540 --> 00:07:31,260 Fix you right up. 6 00:07:41,460 --> 00:07:42,960 Sing with me Bill. 7 00:07:49,940 --> 00:07:52,460 Come on little bell sing with me. 8 00:07:52,460 --> 00:07:54,320 You know the lyrics. 9 00:07:54,900 --> 00:07:57,960 You lost and gone for. 10 00:08:01,620 --> 00:08:04,560 It was my voice who left. 11 00:08:08,180 --> 00:08:10,340 Sometimes I think it arrived on paper. 12 00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:12,720 I wrote the picture. 13 00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:15,400 Lies interchangeably. 14 00:08:15,400 --> 00:08:19,091 Made me feel like someone else. 15 00:08:19,091 --> 00:08:20,270 For Christ's sake. 16 00:08:20,270 --> 00:08:23,140 The worth to belong to. 17 00:08:23,140 --> 00:08:24,560 That is your daughter. 18 00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:26,060 No. 19 00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:33,000 To safety. To girls. 20 00:08:35,250 --> 00:08:38,110 My mother. Her hair. 21 00:08:38,110 --> 00:08:41,171 Her scar. Her stories. 22 00:08:41,171 --> 00:08:45,860 Won a prize for that story belt. 23 00:08:46,080 --> 00:08:50,411 And your daddy won an art 24 00:08:50,411 --> 00:08:54,030 prize for this drawing. My sister. 25 00:09:05,770 --> 00:09:07,420 My adoration. My heart. 26 00:09:07,420 --> 00:09:09,261 I mean you look like a bone 27 00:09:09,261 --> 00:09:10,581 in that nubby sack shirt. 28 00:09:10,581 --> 00:09:12,160 It does nothing for you. 29 00:09:12,620 --> 00:09:14,220 Look at me. 30 00:09:15,380 --> 00:09:19,580 Trying to look like a man. My sister. 31 00:09:19,620 --> 00:09:21,200 Taking everything. 32 00:09:27,730 --> 00:09:30,870 Before you were even born. One take. 33 00:10:05,660 --> 00:10:08,420 My sister is gone. 34 00:10:10,070 --> 00:10:11,790 My mother is. 35 00:10:15,980 --> 00:10:17,781 My father designs houses in 36 00:10:17,781 --> 00:10:19,900 the room next to my smoking. 37 00:10:57,080 --> 00:11:02,180 I wait for 5am. I pray. 38 00:11:04,410 --> 00:11:05,910 Swim. 39 00:11:43,760 --> 00:11:45,040 You know the drill. 40 00:11:45,040 --> 00:11:47,400 One lick for every pound you're over. 41 00:11:47,680 --> 00:11:49,180 Taurus. 42 00:12:03,700 --> 00:12:05,200 Primer. 43 00:12:30,950 --> 00:12:32,610 One for you, freshman. 44 00:12:32,610 --> 00:12:34,350 So we'll make it count. 45 00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:10,880 Miles does it take? To swim. 46 00:13:19,110 --> 00:13:20,810 To a self. 47 00:14:18,100 --> 00:14:19,800 So you really want this, huh? 48 00:14:46,290 --> 00:14:48,770 You only got a three quarter ride. 49 00:14:55,540 --> 00:14:58,420 Offered the whole nine yards, huh? 50 00:15:14,200 --> 00:15:15,681 Delighted to offer a 51 00:15:15,681 --> 00:15:17,680 partial scholarship. 52 00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:26,860 Last one. 53 00:15:41,090 --> 00:15:43,190 In my head I swam laps. 54 00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:46,920 Didn't even get one full ride. 55 00:15:52,100 --> 00:15:53,100 Hey, don't blame me. 56 00:15:53,100 --> 00:15:55,791 If they don't want you, then 57 00:15:55,791 --> 00:15:56,630 you don't belong there. 58 00:15:56,630 --> 00:15:58,130 I could taste blood. 59 00:15:58,490 --> 00:15:59,990 The answer is no. 60 00:16:02,060 --> 00:16:03,560 Why? 61 00:16:10,650 --> 00:16:12,150 Because he could. 62 00:16:16,640 --> 00:16:18,440 And I was hit. 63 00:17:29,130 --> 00:17:31,030 I'm a coach from Texas Tech. 64 00:17:31,450 --> 00:17:34,770 I'm excited to meet you. Let's talk. 65 00:17:35,820 --> 00:17:37,340 I'd like to have you on our team. 66 00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:05,840 I almost loved her. 67 00:18:12,030 --> 00:18:13,870 There's a gold bell. 68 00:18:45,950 --> 00:18:47,550 Fucking disgusting media. 69 00:18:47,550 --> 00:18:49,930 You should be ashamed of her. 70 00:19:26,710 --> 00:19:29,051 My bedroom holds the wet and 71 00:19:29,051 --> 00:19:30,750 the dark of my body. 72 00:19:33,980 --> 00:19:38,770 It smells like my sweat. And chlorine. 73 00:19:52,490 --> 00:19:54,310 Can't sleep, huh? 74 00:19:55,130 --> 00:19:57,170 Yeah, me neither. Come here. 75 00:20:08,020 --> 00:20:09,760 I want to talk to you. 76 00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:16,381 Listen, I'm sorry I've been 77 00:20:16,381 --> 00:20:17,881 so hard on you lately. 78 00:20:19,710 --> 00:20:23,701 I guess I just really worry 79 00:20:23,701 --> 00:20:25,201 about you out there. 80 00:20:26,610 --> 00:20:27,951 Things are going to be 81 00:20:27,951 --> 00:20:30,350 different when you go to college. 82 00:20:30,750 --> 00:20:32,950 And I want you to listen to me. 83 00:20:32,950 --> 00:20:35,630 He narrated what boys would do to me. 84 00:20:35,630 --> 00:20:38,781 How they put their dirty 85 00:20:38,781 --> 00:20:41,720 hands up my skirt and finger-fuck me. 86 00:20:42,730 --> 00:20:44,350 Fond on my tits. 87 00:20:50,880 --> 00:20:53,620 How disgusting boys would be. 88 00:20:55,280 --> 00:20:56,780 Their hand. 89 00:20:57,140 --> 00:20:59,480 Their hips running in and up. 90 00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:03,380 And their dicks. And his. 91 00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:06,020 Me sitting next to him. 92 00:21:06,660 --> 00:21:10,250 Feeling the heat of him. 93 00:21:10,250 --> 00:21:11,750 Without even looking. 94 00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:12,780 What are you doing out here? 95 00:23:22,100 --> 00:23:23,600 Motherfucker. 96 00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:09,240 All I thought was my own 97 00:24:14,441 --> 00:24:16,180 wide open cunt. 98 00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:23,040 It opens the mouth. 99 00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:25,180 Screaming. 100 00:24:25,180 --> 00:24:27,800 Mother, mother, mother fucker. 101 00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:53,541 I didn't know a girl body 102 00:24:53,541 --> 00:24:55,041 could do that. 103 00:24:57,500 --> 00:24:59,000 Shoot. 104 00:26:23,720 --> 00:26:25,420 It had to explode. 105 00:26:29,850 --> 00:26:31,350 Yuck. 106 00:28:06,990 --> 00:28:08,490 Above your hands. 107 00:28:14,100 --> 00:28:15,580 Father and my brother. 108 00:28:15,580 --> 00:28:17,560 Who have the real voices. 109 00:28:18,710 --> 00:28:21,270 I always hear them in my head. 110 00:28:22,240 --> 00:28:23,040 Really? 111 00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:26,500 What are they saying? 112 00:28:31,340 --> 00:28:32,880 An amazing grace. 113 00:28:37,380 --> 00:28:40,080 Voices of God. Poor Phillip. 114 00:29:04,770 --> 00:29:07,210 I wish I could go back and apologize. 115 00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:23,500 Where it's been gone. 116 00:29:28,170 --> 00:29:30,610 And I know the peace will come. 117 00:29:37,190 --> 00:29:41,890 I've been searching for the dolphins. 118 00:29:42,530 --> 00:29:45,550 It's just a regular James Taylor. 119 00:29:45,550 --> 00:29:49,010 Singing his heart out here in Texas. 120 00:29:50,940 --> 00:29:53,780 And sometimes I wonder. 121 00:29:54,630 --> 00:29:56,310 Do you ever. 122 00:30:03,580 --> 00:30:06,040 This world may never change. 123 00:30:09,930 --> 00:30:12,270 Where it's been gone. 124 00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:19,280 And I know the peace will come. 125 00:30:27,000 --> 00:30:28,600 How'd you always do that? 126 00:30:37,430 --> 00:30:39,050 I feel it. 127 00:30:42,550 --> 00:30:44,670 You're such a pussy. 128 00:30:47,340 --> 00:30:48,240 Take a joke. 129 00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:50,660 You're so fucking sensitive. 130 00:30:53,900 --> 00:30:55,961 This is probably one of the 131 00:30:55,961 --> 00:30:58,340 most pathetic things I've ever seen. 132 00:31:01,100 --> 00:31:05,820 This is what I'm talking about. 133 00:31:05,820 --> 00:31:06,280 It's like. 134 00:31:06,280 --> 00:31:08,141 It's like talking to a 135 00:31:08,141 --> 00:31:09,641 fucking doorknob. 136 00:31:09,820 --> 00:31:12,300 Why didn't you say something? 137 00:31:12,820 --> 00:31:14,361 When you say anything. 138 00:31:14,361 --> 00:31:16,880 I'm being a fucking bitch. 139 00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:19,180 So why don't you do something about it? 140 00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:24,100 You're not a bitch. 141 00:31:27,360 --> 00:31:28,980 Fuck you Phillip. 142 00:31:30,780 --> 00:31:33,880 You don't even fucking know me Phillip. 143 00:32:00,350 --> 00:32:02,850 It means lover of horses. 144 00:32:07,480 --> 00:32:09,040 Or brotherhood. 145 00:32:20,430 --> 00:32:23,190 Wake up motherfucker! Hey Liz. 146 00:32:40,260 --> 00:32:43,660 Wanna get out of here? She's good. 147 00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:45,740 I'll take her back. Hey man. 148 00:32:51,390 --> 00:32:52,890 I shut that door. 149 00:32:53,210 --> 00:32:55,130 Just shut the goddamn door. 150 00:32:57,140 --> 00:32:59,160 I've seen you at practice. 151 00:33:00,550 --> 00:33:02,590 Yeah I flunked out. That's cool. 152 00:33:17,980 --> 00:33:21,760 I can still feel my face. 153 00:33:32,060 --> 00:33:34,620 Addiction is in me for sure. 154 00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:37,681 But I want to describe 155 00:33:37,681 --> 00:33:39,181 something else to you. 156 00:33:40,340 --> 00:33:41,840 Something smaller. 157 00:33:43,810 --> 00:33:45,570 It's a smaller word. 158 00:33:51,320 --> 00:33:54,140 So small I could travel a bloodstream. 159 00:34:16,540 --> 00:34:18,920 Go away Belle. Stay away. 160 00:34:31,570 --> 00:34:33,910 This isn't anything for you. 161 00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:37,640 I'm not talking about anything. 162 00:34:51,380 --> 00:34:53,700 I'm not talking about anything. 163 00:35:00,610 --> 00:35:02,110 I'm not talking about anything. 164 00:35:33,260 --> 00:35:35,160 Forty. I'm sorry. 165 00:35:41,620 --> 00:35:42,261 I'm sorry. 166 00:35:42,261 --> 00:35:44,360 Yeah. 167 00:35:46,820 --> 00:35:48,320 Lydia. 168 00:35:48,940 --> 00:35:53,080 You can talk to us. It helps. 169 00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:55,500 Trust me. 170 00:36:10,560 --> 00:36:12,920 I'm not talking about anything. 171 00:36:14,260 --> 00:36:15,360 You know. 172 00:36:15,360 --> 00:36:18,240 I always like to say. Find meaning. 173 00:36:20,900 --> 00:36:25,240 In life's traffic. Through clearing. 174 00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:27,180 Spiritual barriers. 175 00:36:52,090 --> 00:36:54,170 Proud of you. You know? 176 00:37:00,870 --> 00:37:02,370 Yeah. 177 00:37:03,620 --> 00:37:05,120 Yeah. 178 00:37:14,960 --> 00:37:16,460 Hey. 179 00:37:19,240 --> 00:37:21,260 Would you marry me? 180 00:37:44,210 --> 00:37:45,770 Okay. 181 00:37:52,970 --> 00:37:55,571 And children have their dreams 182 00:37:55,571 --> 00:37:58,490 to hold on to. 183 00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:06,691 And how they fly take us to the moon. 184 00:38:06,691 --> 00:38:08,570 Yes. 185 00:38:09,450 --> 00:38:12,850 They float from you. 186 00:38:14,150 --> 00:38:14,811 Yes. 187 00:38:14,811 --> 00:38:17,030 They float from you. 188 00:38:18,730 --> 00:38:19,531 They float from you. 189 00:38:19,531 --> 00:38:22,870 And they float from you. 190 00:38:25,340 --> 00:38:29,361 And women have themselves to 191 00:38:29,361 --> 00:38:30,861 hold on to. 192 00:38:33,660 --> 00:38:39,220 And how they fly take me by surprise. 193 00:38:41,390 --> 00:38:44,850 They float from me. 194 00:38:45,310 --> 00:38:49,010 They float from me. 195 00:38:50,940 --> 00:38:55,680 And they float from me. So good. 196 00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:31,760 You did so good. 197 00:39:31,820 --> 00:39:33,320 You did so good. 198 00:39:58,370 --> 00:40:00,090 I made you some tea. 199 00:40:00,510 --> 00:40:01,851 I don't want any tea. 200 00:40:01,851 --> 00:40:03,550 What are we going to do? 201 00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:08,500 Lydia. 202 00:40:08,900 --> 00:40:10,240 I love you. 203 00:40:10,240 --> 00:40:12,201 I love you. 204 00:40:12,201 --> 00:40:13,680 And whatever you want to do. 205 00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:16,300 I'll support it. That's it? 206 00:40:27,340 --> 00:40:29,401 More than nothing from the 207 00:40:29,401 --> 00:40:32,080 most passive man on the fucking planet. 208 00:40:47,790 --> 00:40:48,690 Sorry. 209 00:40:48,690 --> 00:40:50,190 I've been kind of sick. 210 00:40:54,520 --> 00:40:56,260 You don't want anything. 211 00:40:56,260 --> 00:40:58,401 And you are killing me when 212 00:40:58,401 --> 00:40:59,980 you're not wanting anything. 213 00:41:00,500 --> 00:41:02,380 What were you thinking? 214 00:41:03,990 --> 00:41:05,030 I don't know. 215 00:41:05,030 --> 00:41:06,750 It's fucking impossible. 216 00:41:07,330 --> 00:41:10,491 I can't stand how nice he is. 217 00:41:10,491 --> 00:41:12,090 I can't stand how nice he is. 218 00:41:12,090 --> 00:41:15,920 But I couldn't have killed it either. 219 00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:22,281 I was thinking maybe there's 220 00:41:22,281 --> 00:41:26,291 a world in which I come and 221 00:41:26,291 --> 00:41:29,430 live with you and Eugene. 222 00:41:29,430 --> 00:41:31,051 And take some classes where 223 00:41:31,051 --> 00:41:31,890 you're teaching. 224 00:41:31,890 --> 00:41:33,810 And I don't know. 225 00:41:33,810 --> 00:41:36,150 Maybe we could start like a 226 00:41:37,880 --> 00:41:40,020 little family. 227 00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:46,081 Yes. 228 00:41:46,081 --> 00:41:48,561 Because I think my life with 229 00:41:48,561 --> 00:41:49,601 him is going to be like some stupid. 230 00:41:49,601 --> 00:41:50,340 Sad. 231 00:41:50,340 --> 00:41:50,900 Sad. 232 00:41:50,900 --> 00:41:52,340 Fucking. Country song. 233 00:41:52,340 --> 00:41:52,781 And I... 234 00:41:52,781 --> 00:41:53,181 Lydia. 235 00:41:53,181 --> 00:41:53,880 Lydia. 236 00:41:53,880 --> 00:41:57,920 I said yes. Come home. 237 00:42:03,070 --> 00:42:04,570 Okay. 238 00:42:07,440 --> 00:42:08,940 Cool. 239 00:42:10,930 --> 00:42:12,370 Because she left me once. 240 00:42:12,370 --> 00:42:15,860 To save her own life. 241 00:42:24,860 --> 00:42:26,300 What are you doing back there, huh? 242 00:42:26,300 --> 00:42:27,800 Playing with yourselves? 243 00:42:29,380 --> 00:42:30,880 What? 244 00:42:31,220 --> 00:42:32,181 I bring them to the most 245 00:42:32,181 --> 00:42:34,061 beautiful scenery in the world and... 246 00:42:34,061 --> 00:42:35,960 And they're just playing grab ass? 247 00:42:38,340 --> 00:42:40,580 Look out the goddamn window! 248 00:42:58,700 --> 00:43:00,200 Claudia. 249 00:43:00,480 --> 00:43:02,001 Grab the hacksaw from under 250 00:43:02,001 --> 00:43:04,780 your mother's seat. Come on! 251 00:43:04,780 --> 00:43:06,280 Let's go. 252 00:43:30,620 --> 00:43:32,480 Here you go, sweetheart. 253 00:43:32,900 --> 00:43:34,400 For sustenance. 254 00:43:35,620 --> 00:43:37,120 For sustenance. 255 00:43:38,670 --> 00:43:40,350 You don't want it? 256 00:43:47,680 --> 00:43:48,920 Come on, honey. 257 00:43:48,920 --> 00:43:49,700 Just have a little sip. 258 00:43:49,700 --> 00:43:51,080 It'll warm you up. 259 00:43:51,080 --> 00:43:52,580 Mmm. 260 00:43:59,620 --> 00:44:01,120 Mmm. 261 00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:24,260 Well, thank God. 262 00:44:31,550 --> 00:44:33,350 Where's the tree? 263 00:44:47,600 --> 00:44:49,960 That's the picture. Welcome home. 264 00:45:00,450 --> 00:45:01,950 Oh! 265 00:45:05,580 --> 00:45:07,080 Come on in. 266 00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:07,361 Shit. 267 00:45:07,361 --> 00:45:08,600 I'll get that. 268 00:45:08,600 --> 00:45:10,540 Why because I'm pregnant? 269 00:45:10,640 --> 00:45:12,140 Yeah. 270 00:45:37,360 --> 00:45:38,860 Here. 271 00:45:53,210 --> 00:45:54,710 Thank you, Claudia. 272 00:46:03,600 --> 00:46:05,001 Do you remember when you used 273 00:46:05,001 --> 00:46:06,501 to make me do things? 274 00:46:10,520 --> 00:46:11,041 Like... 275 00:46:11,041 --> 00:46:12,541 Here. 276 00:46:12,620 --> 00:46:13,960 Bite this apple. 277 00:46:13,960 --> 00:46:16,400 It's just sucking in my mouth. 278 00:46:18,860 --> 00:46:19,300 Here. 279 00:46:19,300 --> 00:46:20,900 Smell this ashtray. 280 00:46:20,900 --> 00:46:21,780 Just blow it. 281 00:46:21,780 --> 00:46:22,560 One. 282 00:46:22,560 --> 00:46:23,180 Two. 283 00:46:23,180 --> 00:46:26,040 Ashes all over my fucking face. 284 00:46:30,110 --> 00:46:32,090 I would've done anything. 285 00:46:36,670 --> 00:46:38,790 You were mythic to me. 286 00:46:42,610 --> 00:46:44,331 And I went downstairs after 287 00:46:44,331 --> 00:46:45,870 you moved into the basement. 288 00:46:46,350 --> 00:46:47,610 I don't know. 289 00:46:47,610 --> 00:46:51,151 I realized how smart that was 290 00:46:51,151 --> 00:46:52,651 then, but... 291 00:46:53,770 --> 00:46:55,451 I used to look at all of 292 00:46:55,451 --> 00:46:58,430 your stuff and used to touch it. 293 00:46:59,740 --> 00:47:02,021 One time I found a razor 294 00:47:02,021 --> 00:47:04,380 blade in your purse, cut myself on it. 295 00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:07,260 I made the fact that I had to pee hurt. 296 00:47:24,970 --> 00:47:29,810 I know that this is a sacrifice. 297 00:47:32,430 --> 00:47:36,680 No, it's just you. 298 00:47:38,580 --> 00:47:40,460 You were so little. 299 00:47:57,330 --> 00:47:58,851 This is one way to 300 00:47:58,851 --> 00:48:00,870 Frankenstein your life. 301 00:48:10,480 --> 00:48:11,141 Maybe... 302 00:48:11,141 --> 00:48:13,840 I've been waiting for this. 303 00:48:40,390 --> 00:48:41,890 Brie. 304 00:49:36,030 --> 00:49:37,670 Where is she? 305 00:49:39,890 --> 00:49:42,310 Can I hold her? Uh, yeah. 306 00:50:15,620 --> 00:50:18,040 Her lips are pink. They're pink. 307 00:51:36,940 --> 00:51:42,030 Just throw it as far as you can. 308 00:52:06,970 --> 00:52:09,450 It's not funny. Get it? 309 00:54:31,950 --> 00:54:33,710 Sorry. It's me. 310 00:54:39,180 --> 00:54:41,160 God damn, girl. 311 00:54:41,680 --> 00:54:43,440 What are you, some kind of mermaid? 312 00:54:45,240 --> 00:54:46,740 Yup. 313 00:54:51,940 --> 00:54:54,280 You got something to say? No way. 314 00:54:58,640 --> 00:55:00,140 Come on! 315 00:55:01,080 --> 00:55:02,460 You deserve this. 316 00:55:02,460 --> 00:55:04,420 You don't want to come with me? 317 00:55:05,260 --> 00:55:06,260 This is crazy. 318 00:55:06,260 --> 00:55:07,660 I'm not even a grad student. 319 00:55:07,660 --> 00:55:08,681 I'm basically just trolling 320 00:55:08,681 --> 00:55:09,461 the English department. 321 00:55:09,461 --> 00:55:11,001 You think Keezy gives a rat's 322 00:55:11,001 --> 00:55:12,640 ass about UFO rules? 323 00:55:12,640 --> 00:55:14,780 You will regret not doing this. 324 00:55:14,780 --> 00:55:16,380 They won't even let me enroll. 325 00:55:17,100 --> 00:55:17,541 Bullshit. 326 00:55:17,541 --> 00:55:19,280 I already told them about you. 327 00:55:22,080 --> 00:55:23,580 These... 328 00:55:25,540 --> 00:55:27,360 He's gonna love you. 329 00:55:32,220 --> 00:55:33,461 You don't want to write a 330 00:55:33,461 --> 00:55:35,520 novel with Ken Keezy. Hey, everyone. 331 00:55:57,530 --> 00:55:59,110 Um, hey everybody. 332 00:55:59,110 --> 00:56:00,610 Hey. 333 00:56:03,760 --> 00:56:05,260 You're an idiot. 334 00:56:05,260 --> 00:56:06,060 Hi. 335 00:56:06,060 --> 00:56:08,260 Um, this is Lydia. Say hi. 336 00:56:13,410 --> 00:56:15,690 Hi. Well, hello. 337 00:56:15,790 --> 00:56:17,850 What do we have here? 338 00:56:17,910 --> 00:56:20,030 A triple-A tootsie? 339 00:56:44,540 --> 00:56:45,360 Jeff. 340 00:56:45,360 --> 00:56:45,540 Yes. 341 00:56:45,540 --> 00:56:46,880 You think you can roll one? 342 00:56:46,880 --> 00:56:48,401 I always hate sitting in a 343 00:56:48,401 --> 00:56:49,880 room full of writers. 344 00:56:49,880 --> 00:56:51,380 Sure. 345 00:56:59,840 --> 00:57:01,960 The chair will be fine. 346 00:57:03,230 --> 00:57:05,590 I want you all... 347 00:57:10,620 --> 00:57:12,860 I want you all to be winners. 348 00:57:13,780 --> 00:57:16,940 I want you to be warriors. 349 00:57:18,350 --> 00:57:19,650 Warriors. 350 00:57:19,650 --> 00:57:21,950 I'll give you the warrior test. 351 00:57:22,210 --> 00:57:25,850 Shit floats. Cream rises. 352 00:57:25,930 --> 00:57:29,050 Shit floats. Jerry Rubin. 353 00:57:39,300 --> 00:57:41,500 Cream rises. Ferling Getty. 354 00:57:44,300 --> 00:57:47,540 Lord Buckley. Lenny Bruce. 355 00:57:48,560 --> 00:57:50,060 The greats. 356 00:57:51,650 --> 00:57:53,790 I want you to be great. 357 00:57:56,160 --> 00:57:59,521 Shit, somebody has got to 358 00:57:59,521 --> 00:58:01,001 create our culture for the 359 00:58:01,001 --> 00:58:02,841 next 50 years and I want it to be you. 360 00:58:02,841 --> 00:58:04,700 All right, there are only two rules. 361 00:58:04,700 --> 00:58:07,941 One, do not talk the plot of 362 00:58:07,941 --> 00:58:11,180 our novel to anyone outside this class. 363 00:58:11,320 --> 00:58:15,040 Two, I comprise 50% of the class. 364 00:58:15,040 --> 00:58:17,921 So we only write together 365 00:58:17,921 --> 00:58:21,761 because we will publish or 366 00:58:21,761 --> 00:58:23,261 perish together. 367 00:58:29,220 --> 00:58:33,671 Nelson Augeron says the job 368 00:58:33,671 --> 00:58:36,731 of the writer is to pull the 369 00:58:36,731 --> 00:58:40,341 judge down onto the dock to 370 00:58:40,341 --> 00:58:43,441 make the almighty feel what 371 00:58:43,441 --> 00:58:45,720 it's like to be down low. 372 00:58:46,120 --> 00:58:48,040 It'll be all right. 373 00:58:49,220 --> 00:58:54,730 Grass never killed anybody. So, go. 374 00:58:55,930 --> 00:58:57,430 Right now. 375 00:58:58,190 --> 00:59:00,130 Write some bizarre sentences. 376 00:59:00,190 --> 00:59:00,610 Hey! 377 00:59:00,610 --> 00:59:02,550 Where are you? 378 00:59:03,230 --> 00:59:04,951 You can't take quaaludes 379 00:59:04,951 --> 00:59:06,451 before the class. 380 00:59:06,990 --> 00:59:09,210 Now disappear into your imagination. 381 00:59:09,210 --> 00:59:10,190 Come on! 382 00:59:10,190 --> 00:59:12,151 Disappear into your imagination. 383 00:59:12,151 --> 00:59:13,571 Nobody's in the room but you 384 00:59:13,571 --> 00:59:15,071 and that pen. 385 00:59:22,540 --> 00:59:24,040 Here you are. 386 00:59:24,040 --> 00:59:25,960 This is the shed. 387 00:59:30,880 --> 00:59:32,960 I wrote demon boxing here. 388 00:59:33,460 --> 00:59:35,980 This room here is a creative room here. 389 00:59:35,980 --> 00:59:38,480 It's a creative space. Hey, Bennett. 390 00:59:38,480 --> 00:59:39,801 You didn't even bring the 391 00:59:39,801 --> 00:59:40,740 ludes with you, did you? 392 00:59:40,740 --> 00:59:42,901 You know, those kind of drugs 393 00:59:42,901 --> 00:59:44,801 put you into your body, not 394 00:59:44,801 --> 00:59:46,301 into your mind. 395 00:59:46,620 --> 00:59:48,180 Stick with the acid, 396 00:59:48,180 --> 00:59:50,460 psilocybin, San Pedro. 397 00:59:51,000 --> 00:59:52,961 Something to disintegrate your 398 00:59:52,961 --> 00:59:55,760 ego so you can hear your inner voice. 399 00:59:57,060 --> 00:59:58,481 And you write from that voice. 400 00:59:58,481 --> 00:59:58,681 You know, 27-2199. 401 00:59:58,681 --> 00:59:58,821 Let me see you. 402 00:59:58,821 --> 01:00:00,321 hero! 403 01:00:02,450 --> 01:00:05,090 We want your voice to come through. 404 01:00:13,570 --> 01:00:15,590 It's supposed to happen. 405 01:00:16,710 --> 01:00:18,350 I got rustler's knees. 406 01:00:20,130 --> 01:00:22,971 All right, let's get outside 407 01:00:22,971 --> 01:00:24,670 before the sun sets. 408 01:00:24,910 --> 01:00:30,010 I want you to meet someone. 409 01:00:32,610 --> 01:00:34,210 Come on up. 410 01:00:34,550 --> 01:00:36,050 Fuck you, God. 411 01:00:37,460 --> 01:00:39,100 God got the commandments wrong. 412 01:00:39,100 --> 01:00:40,820 I think there's 11 commandments. 413 01:00:40,820 --> 01:00:42,400 And it should be the first commandment. 414 01:00:42,400 --> 01:00:43,900 Have mercy. 415 01:00:43,940 --> 01:00:46,040 Lord, have mercy. 416 01:00:46,140 --> 01:00:47,861 Just think, if everybody had 417 01:00:47,861 --> 01:00:48,941 mercy for each other, 418 01:00:48,941 --> 01:00:50,300 where we'd be today. 419 01:00:50,300 --> 01:00:51,780 You see a man in the street, 420 01:00:51,780 --> 01:00:52,561 needs a few dollars, 421 01:00:52,561 --> 01:00:54,020 give it to him. Give it to him. 422 01:00:54,020 --> 01:00:54,780 Have mercy. 423 01:00:54,780 --> 01:00:56,280 He needs it. 424 01:00:56,420 --> 01:00:58,041 He wouldn't ask for it if he 425 01:00:58,041 --> 01:00:59,541 didn't need it. 426 01:01:01,810 --> 01:01:07,280 Mercy, hire me to rewrite the Bible. 427 01:01:29,720 --> 01:01:31,660 Lord, are you some kind of mermaid? 428 01:01:40,820 --> 01:01:42,320 Yep. 429 01:01:54,530 --> 01:01:56,630 You know, when Jed died, my boy, 430 01:01:57,750 --> 01:02:00,110 I wanted to cease to exist. 431 01:02:08,380 --> 01:02:09,981 And everybody that talked to 432 01:02:09,981 --> 01:02:12,580 me said something asinine. 433 01:02:15,950 --> 01:02:17,870 Lord, he didn't say anything at all. 434 01:02:32,210 --> 01:02:34,710 He understands death anymore. 435 01:02:38,810 --> 01:02:42,390 We used to be sacred. So sacred. 436 01:02:50,190 --> 01:02:51,951 No one's big enough to hold 437 01:02:51,951 --> 01:02:53,451 what happens to us. 438 01:02:56,860 --> 01:02:58,900 No one is big enough. 439 01:03:08,320 --> 01:03:09,820 You got something to say? 440 01:03:18,110 --> 01:03:20,110 It's in your hands. 441 01:03:43,510 --> 01:03:45,491 Everything about my father was 442 01:03:45,491 --> 01:03:46,991 in his hands. 443 01:04:03,350 --> 01:04:05,970 Before my father was my father. 444 01:04:06,150 --> 01:04:07,950 He was an artist. 445 01:04:07,950 --> 01:04:09,470 And your daddy. 446 01:04:16,440 --> 01:04:18,440 Before my father was an artist. 447 01:04:19,130 --> 01:04:20,750 He was an athlete. 448 01:04:27,980 --> 01:04:29,480 He was beautiful. 449 01:04:30,040 --> 01:04:31,540 And she was. 450 01:04:32,130 --> 01:04:34,450 Before my father was my father. 451 01:04:34,910 --> 01:04:40,770 He was a boy whose own mother. 452 01:04:42,100 --> 01:04:43,600 His tongue. 453 01:04:48,880 --> 01:04:54,080 Before I hated him, I loved him. 454 01:04:59,900 --> 01:05:00,740 Look up. 455 01:05:00,740 --> 01:05:01,981 You know, if you don't look 456 01:05:01,981 --> 01:05:02,520 where you're going, 457 01:05:02,520 --> 01:05:03,180 you're going to crash. 458 01:05:03,180 --> 01:05:03,740 You hear me? 459 01:05:03,740 --> 01:05:04,880 And get to the bottom of the hill, 460 01:05:04,880 --> 01:05:06,840 you just break enough to make a turn. 461 01:05:14,560 --> 01:05:16,060 Okay? Keep going. 462 01:05:16,140 --> 01:05:17,900 Keep your head up. 463 01:05:43,880 --> 01:05:45,680 You done with that, chapter? 464 01:06:11,670 --> 01:06:13,170 Hey. 465 01:06:14,080 --> 01:06:15,580 Huh? 466 01:06:21,470 --> 01:06:23,710 I'm a writer. Thank you. 467 01:06:40,260 --> 01:06:41,240 Thank you. 468 01:06:41,240 --> 01:06:44,201 We are gathered because we 469 01:06:44,201 --> 01:06:45,720 want to see the results. 470 01:06:45,720 --> 01:06:47,201 We want to witness the 471 01:06:47,201 --> 01:06:50,820 results of this experiment. 472 01:06:50,820 --> 01:06:55,580 A collaborative novel written by us. 473 01:06:55,800 --> 01:06:58,701 Please, let's welcome the 474 01:06:58,701 --> 01:07:01,161 first of the not-so-merry pranksters 475 01:07:01,161 --> 01:07:06,440 to the stage to present Caverns. 476 01:07:06,660 --> 01:07:09,520 Lydia, come on up. 477 01:07:12,000 --> 01:07:14,080 We're going to kill it. 478 01:07:34,890 --> 01:07:36,390 Hello. 479 01:07:36,590 --> 01:07:37,031 Um... 480 01:07:37,031 --> 01:07:38,430 Behind my knee. 481 01:07:38,430 --> 01:07:39,830 There you go. You too. 482 01:07:39,830 --> 01:07:40,930 Thank you. We're coming. 483 01:07:40,930 --> 01:07:44,450 Back to my knees. Lydia's father. 484 01:07:45,170 --> 01:07:46,390 What can I say? 485 01:07:46,390 --> 01:07:48,470 I'm a great admirer of yours. 486 01:07:48,650 --> 01:07:49,510 Mike. 487 01:07:49,510 --> 01:07:51,990 Is that right? That's right. 488 01:07:52,430 --> 01:07:54,490 I'm glad you could make it. 489 01:07:55,190 --> 01:07:56,951 Lydia and I, we saw a 490 01:07:56,951 --> 01:07:59,091 cuckoo's nest and sometimes a 491 01:07:59,091 --> 01:07:59,990 great notion together, 492 01:07:59,990 --> 01:08:01,330 and it's just great. 493 01:08:01,330 --> 01:08:03,310 I mean, great books. 494 01:08:05,610 --> 01:08:08,110 You know, Mike, Lydia here, 495 01:08:11,790 --> 01:08:14,270 she can knock it out of the park. 496 01:08:18,240 --> 01:08:20,400 Do you want me to sign that? 497 01:08:23,900 --> 01:08:25,940 Thanks for coming, Dad. 498 01:08:35,130 --> 01:08:36,630 Mike. 499 01:08:42,050 --> 01:08:46,100 Please. Be brave. 500 01:09:04,350 --> 01:09:05,850 Yep. 501 01:09:25,700 --> 01:09:27,480 I've seen a lot of writers, 502 01:09:32,280 --> 01:09:33,780 and you got the stuff. 503 01:09:49,020 --> 01:09:50,181 It comes to the most 504 01:09:50,181 --> 01:09:53,260 spiritual beach on Earth. Hold that. 505 01:09:56,770 --> 01:09:58,730 You can hold it all. 506 01:10:01,460 --> 01:10:03,580 You're going to hold it all, girl. 507 01:10:10,580 --> 01:10:14,440 So, so what's next? 508 01:10:17,630 --> 01:10:18,151 Next. 509 01:10:18,151 --> 01:10:20,330 Next. What's next? 510 01:10:20,330 --> 01:10:21,830 Next. 511 01:10:29,470 --> 01:10:30,691 I'm going to write the sound 512 01:10:30,691 --> 01:10:32,191 and the fury. 513 01:10:42,970 --> 01:10:44,750 Of course you do. 514 01:10:53,430 --> 01:10:55,230 See if I can catch it. 515 01:10:55,230 --> 01:10:55,810 Ready? 516 01:10:55,810 --> 01:10:57,310 Yeah. 517 01:11:03,430 --> 01:11:05,710 I'm not writing on that going in. 518 01:11:09,010 --> 01:11:14,310 It has no metaphor. Fuck metaphor. 519 01:11:15,440 --> 01:11:15,760 Okay. 520 01:11:15,760 --> 01:11:17,700 It's just a rock that fell. 521 01:11:26,550 --> 01:11:28,110 I'm going to get the rock, 522 01:11:28,110 --> 01:11:30,370 and I'm going to go pee. All right. 523 01:11:30,710 --> 01:11:31,870 Oh, yeah. 524 01:11:31,870 --> 01:11:32,710 There we go. 525 01:11:32,710 --> 01:11:34,210 You got it. 526 01:11:37,700 --> 01:11:39,440 It's time I saw him. 527 01:11:40,140 --> 01:11:42,100 You can write, girl. 528 01:11:42,420 --> 01:11:45,440 I'm of the opinion that he drowned. 529 01:11:52,400 --> 01:11:56,140 Caddy wants to fuck. She's insatiable. 530 01:11:56,140 --> 01:11:58,301 And because her neighbor boy 531 01:11:58,301 --> 01:12:00,541 man has a giant pants bulge 532 01:12:00,541 --> 01:12:02,021 and a sound that comes out 533 01:12:02,021 --> 01:12:03,440 of him instead of language, 534 01:12:03,440 --> 01:12:05,021 she goes over to his house 535 01:12:05,021 --> 01:12:06,401 and she removes all of her 536 01:12:06,401 --> 01:12:09,300 clothes so he finally fucks her. 537 01:12:09,840 --> 01:12:11,800 And crushes her. 538 01:12:13,140 --> 01:12:13,881 And crushes her. 539 01:12:13,881 --> 01:12:16,201 He fucks her to death, and 540 01:12:16,201 --> 01:12:18,080 she loves it. 541 01:12:18,080 --> 01:12:19,641 And she laughs until she 542 01:12:19,641 --> 01:12:21,720 cries and an ambulance has to come. 543 01:12:21,720 --> 01:12:23,360 But it's too late. 544 01:12:24,090 --> 01:12:26,610 That is the sound and the fury. 545 01:12:28,040 --> 01:12:29,540 Try it. 546 01:12:29,960 --> 01:12:32,081 Look, I've reread the sound 547 01:12:32,081 --> 01:12:33,160 and the fury. 548 01:12:33,160 --> 01:12:34,901 Reworking Faulkner is some 549 01:12:34,901 --> 01:12:36,401 college shit. 550 01:12:40,450 --> 01:12:42,231 Maybe try something original. 551 01:12:42,231 --> 01:12:43,731 I don't know. 552 01:12:46,980 --> 01:12:48,640 I hate them. 553 01:12:48,940 --> 01:12:49,940 Hey. 554 01:12:49,940 --> 01:12:52,340 What the hell does he know? 555 01:12:52,640 --> 01:12:54,400 It is original. 556 01:12:54,400 --> 01:12:56,540 It's a fucking pastiche. 557 01:12:57,260 --> 01:12:58,740 Hey. 558 01:12:58,740 --> 01:12:59,800 Hey. 559 01:12:59,800 --> 01:13:01,500 You want to go to the coast? 560 01:13:01,500 --> 01:13:03,760 They got us a room. Hi, Hannah. 561 01:13:04,220 --> 01:13:04,961 We're actually going to work 562 01:13:04,961 --> 01:13:06,360 on these this weekend. All right. 563 01:13:06,360 --> 01:13:06,960 Come on. 564 01:13:06,960 --> 01:13:09,120 Sure flies on none. What's that? 565 01:13:17,100 --> 01:13:19,600 I fucking dare you. Come on. 566 01:13:23,610 --> 01:13:26,950 Anything. Any time. 567 01:13:27,660 --> 01:13:28,401 Any time. 568 01:13:28,401 --> 01:13:28,780 Anywhere. 569 01:13:28,780 --> 01:13:29,420 Anywhere. 570 01:13:29,420 --> 01:13:29,820 Anything. 571 01:13:29,820 --> 01:13:30,300 Any time. 572 01:13:30,300 --> 01:13:31,120 Please be careful. 573 01:13:31,120 --> 01:13:33,700 To feel absolutely nothing. 574 01:13:38,080 --> 01:13:40,180 And we got some firewood. 575 01:13:40,180 --> 01:13:42,340 Don't anything I wouldn't do. 576 01:14:05,120 --> 01:14:09,820 Is this like a fuck trip? 577 01:14:14,770 --> 01:14:16,270 What? 578 01:14:18,370 --> 01:14:20,790 I never, I never liked pussy. 579 01:18:00,000 --> 01:18:05,000 In water, like in books, you 580 01:18:07,540 --> 01:18:09,040 can leave your life. 581 01:18:34,260 --> 01:18:37,160 We're a happy childhood. We swim. 582 01:18:39,440 --> 01:18:40,420 We race. 583 01:18:40,420 --> 01:18:42,080 You went fast out, Tom. 584 01:18:42,200 --> 01:18:44,600 We laugh like other people's children. 585 01:18:54,550 --> 01:18:56,730 And the first and last name is like. 586 01:18:56,730 --> 01:18:58,110 He goes and cramies. 587 01:18:58,110 --> 01:18:59,870 And win, goela, bell. 588 01:18:59,950 --> 01:19:01,331 Win, goela, bell. 589 01:19:01,331 --> 01:19:02,831 Win, goela, bell. Win, goela. 590 01:19:06,480 --> 01:19:08,860 Making song loops in my skull. 591 01:19:33,990 --> 01:19:34,431 Mono. 592 01:19:34,431 --> 01:19:35,931 Mono? 593 01:19:36,540 --> 01:19:38,080 Isn't that the kissing disease? 594 01:19:42,560 --> 01:19:44,100 Don't be silly. 595 01:19:46,390 --> 01:19:48,770 Everything's gonna be okay, bell. 596 01:19:48,770 --> 01:19:49,690 You'll see. 597 01:19:49,690 --> 01:19:51,190 You're gonna feel better. 598 01:19:54,180 --> 01:19:55,641 And your dad's gonna take 599 01:19:55,641 --> 01:19:57,680 real good care of you. Aren't ya? 600 01:20:00,240 --> 01:20:01,060 We'll be alright. 601 01:20:01,060 --> 01:20:01,440 Okay. 602 01:20:01,440 --> 01:20:03,260 Mama's gonna go sell some houses. 603 01:20:15,430 --> 01:20:17,450 Can you just give it a cup? 604 01:20:24,560 --> 01:20:26,641 It is language letting me say 605 01:20:26,641 --> 01:20:30,160 how four weeks can be years. 606 01:20:31,990 --> 01:20:35,871 It is the yielding expanse of 607 01:20:35,871 --> 01:20:37,970 a white page. 608 01:21:16,150 --> 01:21:18,530 Have you shown these to anyone? 609 01:21:21,450 --> 01:21:22,950 No. 610 01:21:38,780 --> 01:21:40,280 Work is so dark. 611 01:21:42,410 --> 01:21:45,410 What do you know about pain, Lydia? 612 01:21:50,290 --> 01:21:56,360 Um, I know that it matters to me. 613 01:21:58,260 --> 01:22:00,300 I'm gonna take care of you. 614 01:22:04,520 --> 01:22:06,060 Do you understand? 615 01:22:11,510 --> 01:22:13,990 No, ask me for what you want. 616 01:22:21,330 --> 01:22:23,450 That's not right, Angel. 617 01:22:29,720 --> 01:22:40,410 I want you to knock it out of me. 618 01:22:46,640 --> 01:22:48,140 To whip me. 619 01:22:49,620 --> 01:22:53,480 Where would you like to be with, Angel? 620 01:22:57,700 --> 01:22:59,200 Everywhere. 621 01:23:04,620 --> 01:23:06,120 Take it somewhere. 622 01:23:18,280 --> 01:23:19,780 Mom. 623 01:23:53,140 --> 01:23:55,380 I'm trying to be precise. 624 01:24:05,310 --> 01:24:06,271 At the moment my mother was 625 01:24:06,271 --> 01:24:07,930 whining, Daddy was smelling my cunt. 626 01:24:07,930 --> 01:24:08,871 I've reached my best moment 627 01:24:08,871 --> 01:24:09,671 now, he explained. 628 01:24:09,671 --> 01:24:11,091 Now I was sure what he was 629 01:24:11,091 --> 01:24:11,850 referring to. 630 01:24:11,850 --> 01:24:13,310 This is the moment of truth. 631 01:24:13,310 --> 01:24:14,750 I'm going off, off, off, 632 01:24:14,750 --> 01:24:15,590 jacking it off. 633 01:24:15,590 --> 01:24:16,651 My hands are gonna be broken 634 01:24:16,651 --> 01:24:17,390 from this one. 635 01:24:17,390 --> 01:24:18,790 I don't even recognize my own body. 636 01:24:18,790 --> 01:24:19,630 It doesn't matter. 637 01:24:19,630 --> 01:24:20,510 I know you're mine. 638 01:24:20,510 --> 01:24:21,250 I made you. 639 01:24:21,250 --> 01:24:22,070 I'm making you. 640 01:24:22,070 --> 01:24:23,410 I swore I'd live for pleasure. 641 01:24:23,410 --> 01:24:25,510 My tongue is fucking enormous. Feel it. 642 01:24:25,510 --> 01:24:26,411 It's reaching down to my waist. 643 01:24:26,411 --> 01:24:27,591 You're seeing your actual 644 01:24:27,591 --> 01:24:29,550 father in his moment of truth. 645 01:24:29,550 --> 01:24:31,070 God Almighty. Nothing matters. 646 01:24:31,070 --> 01:24:32,770 You're my God. My daughter. 647 01:24:32,770 --> 01:24:33,770 I worship you. 648 01:24:33,770 --> 01:24:34,571 I beg you to do it. 649 01:24:34,571 --> 01:24:35,470 So I can please you. 650 01:24:35,470 --> 01:24:36,110 Now look at it. 651 01:24:36,110 --> 01:24:37,950 It's big in my corkscrewing hand. 652 01:24:37,950 --> 01:24:38,471 Kiss it. 653 01:24:38,471 --> 01:24:40,190 My father explained again. 654 01:24:40,190 --> 01:24:41,250 I am fucking God. 655 01:24:41,250 --> 01:24:43,090 And I made God. Holy shit. 656 01:24:43,090 --> 01:24:44,270 All I have to do is look at God. 657 01:24:44,270 --> 01:24:44,990 And God is happy. 658 01:24:44,990 --> 01:24:45,931 Because I've made God come. 659 01:24:45,931 --> 01:24:47,130 God is in heaven. 660 01:24:47,130 --> 01:24:47,830 I'm in heaven. 661 01:24:47,830 --> 01:24:48,831 And I've died the whole world 662 01:24:48,831 --> 01:24:49,330 in heaven. 663 01:24:49,330 --> 01:24:50,830 I'm coming all over your face. 664 01:24:50,830 --> 01:24:51,931 I licked up his sperm. 665 01:24:51,931 --> 01:24:53,431 It's just making me sick. 666 01:25:13,120 --> 01:25:15,080 Who do you think you are? 667 01:25:17,520 --> 01:25:19,800 My father's daughter. You're one. 668 01:26:04,520 --> 01:26:06,020 Vodka! 669 01:26:09,190 --> 01:26:11,190 Mostly all the time. 670 01:26:13,390 --> 01:26:15,630 I feel nothing about myself. 671 01:26:22,120 --> 01:26:23,980 I make fuck body pain shadows. 672 01:26:54,610 --> 01:26:56,110 Septic. 673 01:27:14,850 --> 01:27:15,930 To escape to year six. 674 01:27:15,930 --> 01:27:19,031 when underwater stories start 675 01:27:19,031 --> 01:27:21,551 itching and yelling begins a 676 01:27:21,551 --> 01:27:23,031 rhythm where drinking gets louder and 677 01:27:23,031 --> 01:27:24,551 go back to kissing women i 678 01:27:24,551 --> 01:27:25,811 know and kissing women i 679 01:27:25,811 --> 01:27:26,951 don't know and what is a 680 01:27:26,951 --> 01:27:28,191 couple over time but a 681 01:27:28,191 --> 01:27:29,471 line i'll show you a fucking 682 01:27:29,471 --> 01:27:31,011 line your fucking bullshit is 683 01:27:31,011 --> 01:27:33,431 taking over the house it was taking 684 01:27:33,431 --> 01:27:36,750 over the house i didn't want 685 01:28:17,081 --> 01:28:21,890 a drink i wanted to write 686 01:28:36,940 --> 01:28:39,880 you're seven i finished my dissertation 687 01:28:46,030 --> 01:28:48,430 you're eight i get a phd 688 01:29:04,210 --> 01:29:09,160 you're ten you pretend you 689 01:29:13,300 --> 01:29:18,861 said that you would love me 690 01:29:18,861 --> 01:29:20,840 until i died you said 691 01:29:25,071 --> 01:29:27,470 we would die together in love 692 01:29:47,130 --> 01:29:56,860 where are you there is the 693 01:30:12,650 --> 01:30:15,470 man who would love a woman like me 694 01:33:01,720 --> 01:33:07,330 the data shivering arms little 695 01:34:56,101 --> 01:34:58,501 tragedies are difficult to 696 01:34:58,501 --> 01:35:01,520 keep straight chronology convinces 697 01:35:05,921 --> 01:35:07,321 us we are moving toward a 698 01:35:07,321 --> 01:35:09,341 real place swimmers to your 699 01:35:09,341 --> 01:35:14,341 marks gunshot a gunshot 700 01:35:14,341 --> 01:35:16,300 released our tense flesh 701 01:35:17,080 --> 01:35:18,801 fathers were often 702 01:35:18,801 --> 01:35:20,621 uncontainable while the little 703 01:35:20,621 --> 01:35:22,720 women swam for their lives 704 01:35:24,750 --> 01:35:30,530 swim hurry harder faster 705 01:35:36,840 --> 01:35:40,021 a cacophony of men swelling 706 01:35:40,021 --> 01:35:42,901 and pressing down on the wet 707 01:35:42,901 --> 01:35:47,511 motion how many times did i 708 01:35:47,511 --> 01:35:48,511 slip into the 709 01:35:48,511 --> 01:35:51,110 chlorinated depths secretly 710 01:35:51,410 --> 01:35:54,671 hoping to shed this useless 711 01:35:54,671 --> 01:35:59,350 skin and emerge something amphibious 712 01:36:06,010 --> 01:36:09,250 about gender and waiting to 713 01:36:27,341 --> 01:36:30,160 see what comes out it's 714 01:36:32,860 --> 01:36:38,320 creepy and idiotic starting to 715 01:36:40,181 --> 01:36:41,861 piss me off 716 01:36:41,861 --> 01:36:44,281 that i have to even think 717 01:36:44,281 --> 01:36:48,640 that hole what i am saying 718 01:36:53,290 --> 01:36:54,771 there is a woman in a room 719 01:36:54,771 --> 01:36:58,130 who is tired of looking down 720 01:37:02,740 --> 01:37:06,660 bleeding bearing and it of 721 01:37:11,121 --> 01:37:14,581 remaining open with no hope 722 01:37:14,581 --> 01:37:18,160 of suturing herself up it 723 01:37:28,021 --> 01:37:31,120 isn't that i want it gone it's that 724 01:37:37,320 --> 01:37:42,620 wanting to come from somewhere 725 01:37:51,620 --> 01:37:54,360 near the surface with grateful 726 01:37:55,470 --> 01:37:57,891 remind me why we're here i 727 01:37:57,891 --> 01:38:00,051 thought this was your idea i 728 01:38:00,051 --> 01:38:01,551 came here with you 729 01:38:06,050 --> 01:38:07,550 delusion 730 01:38:09,450 --> 01:38:13,490 women are idiots she begged i 731 01:38:23,450 --> 01:38:24,950 changed my name 732 01:39:03,950 --> 01:39:09,620 kill or suck the killing back 733 01:39:13,850 --> 01:39:19,870 pump it into the story of someone else 734 01:39:22,690 --> 01:39:24,971 my father lost his memory 735 01:39:24,971 --> 01:39:28,650 from hypoxia that day i did 736 01:39:32,211 --> 01:39:36,361 not kill him did not save 737 01:39:36,361 --> 01:39:40,510 him i am learning 738 01:39:41,030 --> 01:39:42,910 to live on land 739 01:39:51,300 --> 01:39:53,080 go back 740 01:40:07,490 --> 01:40:09,751 but have your parents read 741 01:40:09,751 --> 01:40:11,470 this story and what do they think 742 01:40:11,950 --> 01:40:12,971 join new york 743 01:40:12,971 --> 01:40:14,990 you're gonna get an e-job 744 01:40:18,100 --> 01:40:19,741 oh yeah it's so nice to meet 745 01:40:19,741 --> 01:40:21,420 you thank you for being here 746 01:40:21,700 --> 01:40:23,200 excuse me 747 01:40:23,830 --> 01:40:26,030 do you have anything um 748 01:40:29,830 --> 01:40:31,330 thanks 749 01:40:35,830 --> 01:40:36,871 carol hoax smith 750 01:40:36,871 --> 01:40:38,371 norton publishing 751 01:40:39,730 --> 01:40:41,251 it's pretty impressive what 752 01:40:41,251 --> 01:40:41,831 you did up there 753 01:40:41,831 --> 01:40:44,830 thank you 754 01:40:45,690 --> 01:40:49,230 no really it didn't look easy 755 01:40:49,230 --> 01:40:52,541 tell me is there any more 756 01:40:52,541 --> 01:40:53,241 where that came from 757 01:40:53,241 --> 01:40:55,440 something in a little while 758 01:40:59,200 --> 01:41:01,240 you should send me something 759 01:41:05,960 --> 01:41:09,440 it's just that something in 760 01:41:11,811 --> 01:41:16,350 me had been born still 761 01:41:49,000 --> 01:41:51,660 it's a small stem we carry 762 01:41:55,830 --> 01:41:58,290 shame of wanting something good 763 01:45:23,040 --> 01:45:24,540 hi 764 01:45:27,690 --> 01:45:29,410 chop and block 765 01:45:29,630 --> 01:45:30,990 peer review 766 01:45:30,990 --> 01:45:32,890 who wants to go first 767 01:45:34,640 --> 01:45:36,140 really helpful 768 01:45:36,160 --> 01:45:39,080 you know you can't look the wrong line 769 01:45:40,100 --> 01:45:41,761 your one is just as important 770 01:45:41,761 --> 01:45:42,301 as your own 771 01:45:42,301 --> 01:45:42,840 you have to 772 01:45:42,840 --> 01:45:43,961 it has to hurt 773 01:45:43,961 --> 01:45:45,800 but i'm excited for you 774 01:46:42,220 --> 01:46:44,881 something small and specific 775 01:46:44,881 --> 01:46:45,761 caught my eye 776 01:46:45,761 --> 01:46:47,800 an important detail 777 01:46:48,060 --> 01:46:48,981 a bruise 778 01:46:48,981 --> 01:46:50,381 on the bridge of her nose 779 01:46:50,381 --> 01:46:52,261 letting me know that her eyes were blue 780 01:46:52,261 --> 01:46:52,861 like mine 781 01:46:52,861 --> 01:46:54,361 hey 782 01:46:59,640 --> 01:47:02,100 i pay her pimp a hundred dollars 783 01:47:02,100 --> 01:47:03,740 i ask her in 784 01:47:03,840 --> 01:47:05,680 i tell her to sit down 785 01:47:09,360 --> 01:47:11,241 in the story i say 786 01:47:11,241 --> 01:47:13,760 this is what it feels like to be me 787 01:47:13,760 --> 01:47:17,160 a woman who teaches english 788 01:47:17,740 --> 01:47:19,461 looking down at a woman who 789 01:47:19,461 --> 01:47:20,981 sucks dicks all day 790 01:47:20,981 --> 01:47:22,980 she sits on my couch 791 01:47:23,660 --> 01:47:25,160 smoking 792 01:47:26,580 --> 01:47:27,580 look at her 793 01:47:27,580 --> 01:47:30,060 i think she looks like mary 794 01:47:51,450 --> 01:47:52,811 in the story 795 01:47:52,811 --> 01:47:54,730 in the story i say 796 01:47:56,390 --> 01:47:58,510 what am i gonna do 797 01:47:59,000 --> 01:48:00,620 teacher 798 01:48:03,030 --> 01:48:04,811 this is what me 799 01:48:04,811 --> 01:48:05,831 an addict 800 01:48:05,831 --> 01:48:07,350 upwardly mobile 801 01:48:07,350 --> 01:48:08,911 given something as 802 01:48:08,911 --> 01:48:11,031 infinitesimally small as words 803 01:48:11,031 --> 01:48:11,791 to believe in 804 01:48:11,791 --> 01:48:13,291 thinks 805 01:48:13,310 --> 01:48:15,130 i'm looking at her 806 01:48:19,580 --> 01:48:21,740 offer words 807 01:48:34,650 --> 01:48:37,010 people say to me all the time 808 01:48:37,010 --> 01:48:40,501 did the things in your short stories 809 01:48:40,501 --> 01:48:42,180 actually happen 810 01:48:44,780 --> 01:48:46,181 isn't that the 811 01:48:46,181 --> 01:48:48,750 the question 812 01:48:48,750 --> 01:48:51,970 when it comes to life 813 01:48:57,090 --> 01:48:59,890 did this really happen to me 814 01:49:07,740 --> 01:49:09,020 andy 815 01:49:09,020 --> 01:49:12,510 i don't know 816 01:49:19,910 --> 01:49:21,911 the things that happened to us 817 01:49:21,911 --> 01:49:23,411 are true 818 01:49:25,310 --> 01:49:27,030 but writing 819 01:49:27,450 --> 01:49:30,030 is a whole other body 820 01:49:30,710 --> 01:49:32,611 i was hoping we could discuss 821 01:49:32,611 --> 01:49:34,111 my manuscript 822 01:49:34,810 --> 01:49:35,251 oh 823 01:49:35,251 --> 01:49:36,751 of course 824 01:49:36,790 --> 01:49:38,290 yeah 825 01:49:39,850 --> 01:49:42,110 i also want to loan you my car 826 01:49:45,720 --> 01:49:47,441 saw you were taking the bus 827 01:49:47,441 --> 01:49:48,850 and 828 01:49:48,850 --> 01:49:51,070 i happen to have two cars 829 01:50:05,320 --> 01:50:06,820 hey 830 01:50:28,740 --> 01:50:30,841 you can tell a lot about a person 831 01:50:30,841 --> 01:50:32,341 from seeing them in the water 832 01:50:34,240 --> 01:50:35,740 thank you 833 01:50:38,720 --> 01:50:39,500 for what 834 01:50:39,500 --> 01:50:41,680 it's about if you swim with me 835 01:50:41,860 --> 01:50:43,601 i read a couple of your stories 836 01:50:43,601 --> 01:50:45,840 i know that swimming is a good deal 837 01:50:46,880 --> 01:50:48,761 i always let my students choose to run 838 01:50:48,761 --> 01:50:51,281 you know i wanted to say 839 01:50:51,281 --> 01:50:53,300 i've seen you a couple times before 840 01:50:53,480 --> 01:50:55,521 yeah i read about ken kesey 841 01:50:55,521 --> 01:50:56,641 teaching at u of o when i 842 01:50:56,641 --> 01:50:58,161 was abroad and i applied to 843 01:50:58,161 --> 01:51:00,360 the program but it already happened 844 01:51:01,080 --> 01:51:02,501 no shit this is funny 845 01:51:02,501 --> 01:51:04,040 yeah i know 846 01:51:04,040 --> 01:51:05,321 and then i've seen you 847 01:51:05,321 --> 01:51:06,781 stomping around the creative 848 01:51:06,781 --> 01:51:08,281 writing department 849 01:51:09,330 --> 01:51:11,830 i was in the reading you gave a girlie 850 01:51:18,260 --> 01:51:20,240 oh that's weird 851 01:51:20,800 --> 01:51:22,300 weird 852 01:51:24,790 --> 01:51:26,771 it was a weird day for me 853 01:51:26,771 --> 01:51:28,430 why 854 01:51:38,780 --> 01:51:40,341 my father 855 01:51:40,341 --> 01:51:42,060 was 856 01:51:44,020 --> 01:51:44,561 my 857 01:51:44,561 --> 01:51:47,100 my father 858 01:51:50,050 --> 01:51:51,810 your father 859 01:51:53,610 --> 01:51:55,830 was abusive 860 01:51:58,010 --> 01:51:59,950 your father 861 01:52:02,360 --> 01:52:04,180 how's it 862 01:52:05,990 --> 01:52:07,251 sexual 863 01:52:07,251 --> 01:52:08,731 well 864 01:52:08,731 --> 01:52:12,540 it sucks 865 01:52:21,460 --> 01:52:23,341 i hope something karmically 866 01:52:23,341 --> 01:52:24,381 fucked happened to him 867 01:52:24,381 --> 01:52:25,940 yeah 868 01:52:30,140 --> 01:52:31,521 kind of actually 869 01:52:31,521 --> 01:52:33,021 it did 870 01:52:33,040 --> 01:52:34,501 excellent 871 01:52:34,501 --> 01:52:36,001 wow 872 01:52:41,800 --> 01:52:45,411 it was a long time ago i 873 01:52:45,411 --> 01:52:47,190 was a totally different person then 874 01:52:48,570 --> 01:52:50,410 so who are you now 875 01:52:52,750 --> 01:52:54,310 i'm your teacher 876 01:53:00,560 --> 01:53:03,080 i'm teaching you how to take my car 877 01:53:27,120 --> 01:53:28,781 i don't quite know how to 878 01:53:28,781 --> 01:53:30,600 tell you what it feels like 879 01:53:33,780 --> 01:53:35,561 watching the little woman swim 880 01:53:35,561 --> 01:53:37,061 for her life 881 01:53:39,190 --> 01:53:40,950 i mean 882 01:54:02,460 --> 01:54:05,320 are you fucking insane 883 01:54:32,680 --> 01:54:35,020 i can see the mother in you 884 01:54:44,010 --> 01:54:45,851 there's more to your story 885 01:54:45,851 --> 01:54:47,351 than you think 886 01:55:57,590 --> 01:55:58,971 thank you 887 01:55:58,971 --> 01:56:00,471 thanks 888 01:56:48,920 --> 01:56:49,081 sir 889 01:56:49,081 --> 01:56:50,581 what 890 01:57:11,710 --> 01:57:13,570 out the room 891 01:57:13,710 --> 01:57:15,631 they said it would be ready tomorrow 892 01:57:15,631 --> 01:57:17,131 sure 893 01:57:20,570 --> 01:57:21,771 i must 894 01:57:21,771 --> 01:57:24,090 be weird right 895 01:57:59,330 --> 01:58:00,691 hi dad 896 01:58:00,691 --> 01:58:02,191 hello 897 01:58:03,050 --> 01:58:05,250 no it's me it's lydia 898 01:58:05,690 --> 01:58:07,410 i know that kiddo 899 01:58:18,300 --> 01:58:20,280 i read that book 900 01:58:20,740 --> 01:58:22,240 oh yeah 901 01:58:23,880 --> 01:58:25,960 do you know who wrote it 902 01:58:26,460 --> 01:58:27,960 um 903 01:58:30,360 --> 01:58:31,860 you 904 01:58:32,430 --> 01:58:33,930 that's right 905 01:58:36,870 --> 01:58:38,751 did you read all of the stories 906 01:58:38,751 --> 01:58:39,911 i uh 907 01:58:39,911 --> 01:58:43,690 there was one about swimming 908 01:58:49,620 --> 01:58:50,381 thank you 909 01:58:50,381 --> 01:58:51,881 thank you 910 01:58:52,980 --> 01:58:55,280 or a flattering of me though 911 01:58:58,340 --> 01:58:59,840 that's fair enough 912 01:59:10,610 --> 01:59:12,850 prize for that story 913 01:59:13,690 --> 01:59:15,930 i got to go to new york 914 01:59:36,290 --> 01:59:37,791 there's a real home 915 01:59:37,791 --> 01:59:39,291 you have here 916 01:59:46,300 --> 01:59:47,360 don't you 917 01:59:47,360 --> 01:59:51,431 the safest memories are locked 918 01:59:51,431 --> 01:59:52,591 away in the brains of people 919 01:59:52,591 --> 01:59:53,351 who can't remember 920 01:59:53,351 --> 01:59:54,850 oh 921 01:59:54,850 --> 01:59:55,331 oh 922 01:59:55,331 --> 01:59:55,671 get her mine 923 01:59:55,671 --> 01:59:57,171 get her mine 924 01:59:57,190 --> 01:59:58,171 no i don't 925 01:59:58,171 --> 01:59:59,671 get her 926 02:00:03,080 --> 02:00:05,340 Underwater, forever. 927 02:00:07,280 --> 02:00:09,660 They ain't gonna count. I'm swimming. 928 02:00:28,160 --> 02:00:31,500 Nose and ears and into my brain. 929 02:00:32,860 --> 02:00:34,960 Uh, Miles? 930 02:00:37,430 --> 02:00:40,191 How many times have you seen 931 02:00:40,191 --> 02:00:43,330 mums swimming and swimming laps? 932 02:00:45,160 --> 02:00:46,760 Lots of times, right? 933 02:00:46,840 --> 02:00:51,071 Have you ever noticed that 934 02:00:51,071 --> 02:00:54,110 I've never got water in my brain? 935 02:00:56,760 --> 02:00:59,300 Water's never gone in in my brain. 936 02:00:59,300 --> 02:01:02,380 You wanna see? Watch this. 937 02:01:02,380 --> 02:01:03,881 Tell me how much water goes 938 02:01:03,881 --> 02:01:05,381 in my brain, okay? 939 02:01:15,680 --> 02:01:17,180 See? 940 02:01:18,720 --> 02:01:20,040 Okay, pull. 941 02:01:20,040 --> 02:01:22,940 I have a very important game. 942 02:01:22,940 --> 02:01:28,100 I'm gonna put my whole head underwater. 943 02:01:28,660 --> 02:01:29,600 Okay. 944 02:01:29,600 --> 02:01:32,920 And we look at each other underwater. 945 02:01:34,800 --> 02:01:36,080 What game is this? 946 02:01:36,080 --> 02:01:37,580 I made it up. 947 02:01:49,510 --> 02:01:54,700 The key is, make up shit. 948 02:02:03,820 --> 02:02:05,821 I'm not speaking out of my 949 02:02:05,821 --> 02:02:08,560 asshole when I say this. Come in. 950 02:02:13,520 --> 02:02:15,181 The water will hold you. 951 02:02:15,181 --> 02:02:15,201 It will針 on a nearly 80 952 02:02:15,201 --> 02:02:15,241 seconds, so I thank you. 953 02:02:15,241 --> 02:02:15,321 Yeah, it works. 954 02:02:15,321 --> 02:02:15,341 If you are closer to an 955 02:02:15,341 --> 02:02:16,841 hour, do I remember? Thank you.