1 00:00:02,587 --> 00:00:04,255 Yeah, I also have a lot of gay fans. 2 00:00:04,631 --> 00:00:05,632 (CROWD CHEERING) 3 00:00:05,757 --> 00:00:06,799 Oh, and some of them 4 00:00:06,883 --> 00:00:07,943 clearly couldn't get tickets 5 00:00:07,967 --> 00:00:09,260 to Magic Mike Live tonight. 6 00:00:09,427 --> 00:00:10,553 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 7 00:00:10,637 --> 00:00:12,722 I also have a lot of gay enemies. 8 00:00:12,847 --> 00:00:15,517 Or as I like to call them, my exes. 9 00:00:15,642 --> 00:00:17,435 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 10 00:00:17,519 --> 00:00:19,521 The gays have so many terms, right? 11 00:00:19,646 --> 00:00:22,065 I can't keep up. There's top, bottom, 12 00:00:22,273 --> 00:00:24,484 bear, twink, daddy. 13 00:00:24,567 --> 00:00:26,587 A fan told me the other night. A fan told me the other night. 14 00:00:26,611 --> 00:00:28,331 A fan told me after the show the other night 15 00:00:28,613 --> 00:00:31,533 that if I was gay, I would be a power top. 16 00:00:31,658 --> 00:00:32,867 Power top. Power top. 17 00:00:33,826 --> 00:00:35,846 Which, by the way, are 40% off at Ann Taylor right now. 18 00:00:35,870 --> 00:00:37,747 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 19 00:00:37,872 --> 00:00:39,290 I think he's wrong, though. 20 00:00:39,374 --> 00:00:40,601 You know, I don't think there's a term 21 00:00:40,625 --> 00:00:42,019 for the kind of gay man that I would be. 22 00:00:42,043 --> 00:00:43,711 I mean, I'm rich. I wear fabulous clothes. 23 00:00:43,795 --> 00:00:46,089 I love jewelry. Haven't been laid in years. 24 00:00:46,214 --> 00:00:48,466 Oh, my God, I'm the pope! 25 00:00:48,550 --> 00:00:51,219 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 26 00:00:51,344 --> 00:00:53,304 Thank you, you've been a terrific audience. 27 00:00:53,388 --> 00:00:55,139 Not as good as last night, but not bad. 28 00:00:55,557 --> 00:00:59,269 I'm still Deborah Vance. Good night, Las Vegas! 29 00:01:00,979 --> 00:01:01,980 (ELEVATOR DINGS) 30 00:01:02,522 --> 00:01:03,999 WOMAN: I'm sure you're tired of hearing it, 31 00:01:04,023 --> 00:01:05,483 because I'm tired of saying it, 32 00:01:05,567 --> 00:01:08,570 but the TV in my room is still not working. 33 00:01:08,695 --> 00:01:09,696 Okay. 34 00:01:10,572 --> 00:01:11,948 Yeah, um, well, it's just... 35 00:01:12,031 --> 00:01:13,992 It's really important that I have a working TV 36 00:01:14,075 --> 00:01:16,035 'cause I'm a working TV writer. 37 00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:17,745 - Yeah, I've heard. - Yeah. 38 00:01:17,829 --> 00:01:19,497 I would just watch on my laptop, 39 00:01:19,581 --> 00:01:21,833 but I'm trying to cut down on my screen time. 40 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,293 TV is a screen. 41 00:01:23,418 --> 00:01:25,253 Yeah, but it's a second-tier screen. 42 00:01:25,378 --> 00:01:27,298 It's basically like reading a book at this point. 43 00:01:27,505 --> 00:01:29,465 Oh, also, I need more toothpaste. 44 00:01:29,549 --> 00:01:32,010 Well, as you know, the free mini toothpaste 45 00:01:32,093 --> 00:01:34,637 is a guest privilege, and you are a... 46 00:01:34,721 --> 00:01:35,722 What, a resident? 47 00:01:35,805 --> 00:01:38,182 Yeah, and that's way sadder, 48 00:01:38,266 --> 00:01:40,393 which is why I deserve the free toothpaste. 49 00:01:40,518 --> 00:01:42,895 I mean, it's right behind you. I can see it. 50 00:01:43,855 --> 00:01:45,416 - Mm. - Okay, it's not, but you looked... 51 00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:46,584 - Good, mmm-hmm. - Which means you know 52 00:01:46,608 --> 00:01:47,859 - it's nearby. - Yeah. 53 00:01:47,942 --> 00:01:49,211 - Can you help me out? - Excuse me. 54 00:01:49,235 --> 00:01:50,987 - Yeah? - Uh, can I get a toothpaste? 55 00:01:53,323 --> 00:01:54,443 Are you gonna give it to her? 56 00:01:54,741 --> 00:01:55,742 No. 57 00:01:58,536 --> 00:01:59,537 Here you go. 58 00:01:59,621 --> 00:02:01,039 - Thank you so much. - Mmm-hmm. 59 00:02:01,122 --> 00:02:02,415 - There you go. - Well, thanks. 60 00:02:02,540 --> 00:02:04,000 - God damn it. - No problem. 61 00:02:04,083 --> 00:02:05,084 My God. 62 00:02:06,085 --> 00:02:07,253 - Have a good one. - Good job. 63 00:02:07,337 --> 00:02:08,588 All right. 64 00:02:08,671 --> 00:02:10,381 Hey, I'm gonna take my break. All right? 65 00:02:10,465 --> 00:02:12,467 (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) 66 00:02:14,552 --> 00:02:16,672 AVA: Oh, and, um, then I thought you could tag it with 67 00:02:16,763 --> 00:02:18,306 "makes me miss my bunions." 68 00:02:18,389 --> 00:02:19,474 Oh, that's good. 69 00:02:20,266 --> 00:02:21,267 Oh. 70 00:02:21,351 --> 00:02:22,352 Great. 71 00:02:22,935 --> 00:02:23,936 Well, it's a punch line. 72 00:02:25,355 --> 00:02:26,356 Yeah. 73 00:02:26,439 --> 00:02:27,857 Um, oh, and you know how 74 00:02:27,940 --> 00:02:29,525 in the '70s, you had that bit about 75 00:02:29,609 --> 00:02:31,361 hanging yourself with your tampon string? 76 00:02:31,694 --> 00:02:32,945 Yeah, it was genius. 77 00:02:33,029 --> 00:02:34,548 Well, I was thinking we could update it. 78 00:02:34,572 --> 00:02:36,282 Maybe something about drowning yourself 79 00:02:36,366 --> 00:02:37,367 in your Diva cup? 80 00:02:37,909 --> 00:02:38,910 What's a Diva cup? 81 00:02:39,327 --> 00:02:42,455 Yeah, so it's, like, a... It's, like, a silicone cup 82 00:02:42,580 --> 00:02:44,540 that you kinda fold up like a taco and... 83 00:02:44,624 --> 00:02:46,125 (SMACKS LIPS) Just pop in there. 84 00:02:46,250 --> 00:02:47,850 Technically, they're not dishwasher safe, 85 00:02:47,919 --> 00:02:49,754 but I toss 'em in there anyway. 86 00:02:50,004 --> 00:02:51,798 Remind me to never have dinner at your house. 87 00:02:51,881 --> 00:02:53,841 - (LAUGHS) - No, my audience doesn't know 88 00:02:53,925 --> 00:02:55,635 what a Diva cup is, and they don't want to. 89 00:02:56,094 --> 00:02:57,136 Okay, I just... 90 00:02:58,304 --> 00:02:59,889 don't think we should be writing jokes 91 00:02:59,972 --> 00:03:01,432 for a bunch of Panera people. 92 00:03:03,434 --> 00:03:04,811 People who eat at Panera. 93 00:03:05,061 --> 00:03:06,187 Oh, you little shit. 94 00:03:06,646 --> 00:03:08,231 Just because they don't live in L.A. 95 00:03:08,314 --> 00:03:10,125 or New York doesn't mean that what they think is funny 96 00:03:10,149 --> 00:03:12,318 is any less valuable than what you think is funny. 97 00:03:12,694 --> 00:03:15,488 Mm. It kinda does, though. 98 00:03:15,863 --> 00:03:17,740 I mean, have you seen some of the stuff 99 00:03:17,824 --> 00:03:19,158 these people buy on Etsy? 100 00:03:19,242 --> 00:03:20,660 It's all, like, coffee mugs 101 00:03:20,743 --> 00:03:23,079 about how, "Actually, it's wine in there." 102 00:03:23,162 --> 00:03:25,015 So you're telling me that if a lot of people think 103 00:03:25,039 --> 00:03:26,207 something is funny, it's not. 104 00:03:26,666 --> 00:03:27,709 Kinda, yeah. 105 00:03:27,834 --> 00:03:30,211 (SMACKS LIPS) Oh, you're that girl 106 00:03:30,294 --> 00:03:32,046 who never got to sit with the cool kids 107 00:03:32,171 --> 00:03:34,340 at the lunch table, and she just never got over it. 108 00:03:35,091 --> 00:03:37,152 - We had walk-away lunch. - Well, there's a whole lot 109 00:03:37,176 --> 00:03:38,678 of other people in the cafeteria, 110 00:03:38,845 --> 00:03:41,139 and the sooner you learn that, the better off you'll be. 111 00:03:41,389 --> 00:03:42,783 - MARCUS: Deborah, the car's here. - Oh, great. 112 00:03:42,807 --> 00:03:44,684 Um, I'm sorry. 113 00:03:44,767 --> 00:03:46,477 I thought we were working this afternoon. 114 00:03:46,561 --> 00:03:47,854 I am working. 115 00:03:47,937 --> 00:03:49,188 I'm gonna go work Marty 116 00:03:49,856 --> 00:03:51,232 into not cutting my dates. 117 00:03:51,941 --> 00:03:54,193 Okay, I just think we should be concentrating on, like, 118 00:03:54,277 --> 00:03:55,403 the actual material. 119 00:03:56,571 --> 00:03:57,572 Thanks for the tip. 120 00:03:59,532 --> 00:04:00,742 All right, see you tomorrow. 121 00:04:00,867 --> 00:04:02,067 Actually, you'll see me Sunday. 122 00:04:02,118 --> 00:04:03,518 Marcus and I are going on a retreat. 123 00:04:03,870 --> 00:04:05,246 Oh, while I'm gone, didn't you say 124 00:04:05,329 --> 00:04:06,809 you wanted to get your mustache waxed? 125 00:04:07,123 --> 00:04:08,416 - No. - Oh. 126 00:04:09,125 --> 00:04:10,376 Guess I just thought it. 127 00:04:13,838 --> 00:04:16,883 Deborah, please don't go nuclear with Marty. 128 00:04:16,966 --> 00:04:19,135 - I will play nice. - Mmm-hmm, and you'll meet me 129 00:04:19,218 --> 00:04:20,938 at 7:00 for dinner with the Cincher sisters? 130 00:04:21,012 --> 00:04:23,681 - Wait, the what with whom? - They're the sisters 131 00:04:23,765 --> 00:04:25,308 behind Cincher's, the shapewear brand. 132 00:04:25,391 --> 00:04:27,268 - Dinner's at 7:00 p.m. Sharp. - Right. 133 00:04:27,351 --> 00:04:29,228 I got it, I got it. Don't worry, Marcus. 134 00:04:29,729 --> 00:04:31,355 I got it all under control. 135 00:04:31,439 --> 00:04:33,441 (JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING) 136 00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:38,488 DEBORAH: Well, he's into sound baths, right? 137 00:04:38,571 --> 00:04:40,531 - Get him a gong. - He's Japanese. 138 00:04:41,073 --> 00:04:43,993 - So? - So it could be insulting. 139 00:04:44,076 --> 00:04:45,554 He's leaving you to work for your competitor. 140 00:04:45,578 --> 00:04:46,978 - It should be insulting. - Oh, you. 141 00:04:47,580 --> 00:04:49,248 - (GIGGLES) - Yeah, you're right. 142 00:04:49,332 --> 00:04:50,612 Oh, time to get down to business. 143 00:04:51,417 --> 00:04:52,418 What? 144 00:04:53,920 --> 00:04:56,172 - What's this? - Uh, a Seurat, 145 00:04:56,255 --> 00:04:57,590 two Gerhard Richters, 146 00:04:57,715 --> 00:05:00,676 a complete set of Pierre Jeanneret chairs. 147 00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:02,553 The list goes on and on. It's all in there. 148 00:05:02,637 --> 00:05:05,306 I must say, Ivy has impeccable taste. 149 00:05:05,389 --> 00:05:06,390 She might be a keeper. 150 00:05:07,642 --> 00:05:10,311 But paying for your assets through your corporation, 151 00:05:10,394 --> 00:05:11,687 isn't that a big no-no? 152 00:05:11,771 --> 00:05:14,524 Because if your personal net worth is actually more 153 00:05:14,607 --> 00:05:16,859 than what you claimed, couldn't your ex-wives 154 00:05:16,943 --> 00:05:19,028 renegotiate their alimony agreements? 155 00:05:19,862 --> 00:05:22,448 Eh, what do I know? I'm just a washed-up comedian 156 00:05:22,615 --> 00:05:24,742 with a firm grasp of family law. 157 00:05:25,868 --> 00:05:28,996 - What do you want? - Well, as a woman, 158 00:05:29,080 --> 00:05:30,790 I feel that I have an obligation 159 00:05:30,873 --> 00:05:32,708 to share this information with your ex-wives. 160 00:05:32,792 --> 00:05:36,212 - Aw, what a feminist. - Unless you want to, uh, 161 00:05:36,295 --> 00:05:38,256 rethink your taking away my weekend shows? 162 00:05:39,715 --> 00:05:42,134 Oh, so you're fucking with my personal life 163 00:05:42,218 --> 00:05:43,970 over a couple of dates? 164 00:05:44,846 --> 00:05:47,557 Which is unfair, since you don't have 165 00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:49,141 a personal life to fuck with. 166 00:05:50,476 --> 00:05:52,979 Well, it looks like you have about 20 seconds to decide. 167 00:05:53,896 --> 00:05:55,982 - Hi! - You... 168 00:05:56,065 --> 00:05:57,066 Should we do a countdown? 169 00:05:57,149 --> 00:05:58,609 - Oh, let's! - (SIGHS) 170 00:05:58,693 --> 00:06:00,820 - Ten, nine, eight... - Really? 171 00:06:00,903 --> 00:06:02,905 - Fine! - (GASPS) Wonderful! 172 00:06:02,989 --> 00:06:04,824 You can keep those. I've got copies. 173 00:06:04,907 --> 00:06:05,908 (LAUGHS) What a rush! 174 00:06:05,992 --> 00:06:07,493 I should blackmail more often. 175 00:06:07,994 --> 00:06:10,162 (GASPS) Rina, hi! You look fabulous. 176 00:06:10,246 --> 00:06:11,622 - Hi. - Oh, don't worry. 177 00:06:11,706 --> 00:06:13,499 - Marty was just leaving. - Rina! 178 00:06:14,292 --> 00:06:15,501 - Hi. - Hi. 179 00:06:16,836 --> 00:06:19,130 - How are you? - I am fabulous. 180 00:06:19,255 --> 00:06:21,299 - Ugh, what was he drinking? - Mmm-hmm. 181 00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:23,050 He always drinks the weirdest shit. 182 00:06:23,134 --> 00:06:24,319 - Let's get you a real drink. - Thank you. 183 00:06:24,343 --> 00:06:25,595 Excuse me. 184 00:06:26,512 --> 00:06:28,198 AVA: I don't know how many times I have to come down here 185 00:06:28,222 --> 00:06:30,766 and say this. TV is a priority for me, 186 00:06:30,850 --> 00:06:32,226 and as a resident, I truly... 187 00:06:32,310 --> 00:06:33,561 Oh, my God, Ava! 188 00:06:35,855 --> 00:06:37,273 Holy shit! 189 00:06:37,356 --> 00:06:39,150 Oh, my God. 190 00:06:39,233 --> 00:06:42,069 My literal queens! I haven't seen you in so long! 191 00:06:42,153 --> 00:06:44,113 - How are you? - (LAUGHS) 192 00:06:44,196 --> 00:06:46,282 Wow, it's been so long. 193 00:06:46,365 --> 00:06:47,533 How have you been? 194 00:06:47,617 --> 00:06:50,328 Oh, so good! Amazing! 195 00:06:50,411 --> 00:06:52,496 I... I'm so happy to see you. 196 00:06:52,788 --> 00:06:53,956 - I'm Hallie. - Hey, hi. 197 00:06:54,040 --> 00:06:56,208 Oh, so rude of us. Um, Hallie, this is Ava. 198 00:06:56,292 --> 00:06:57,877 She used to write comedy with us. 199 00:06:58,502 --> 00:06:59,587 "Used to"? 200 00:06:59,712 --> 00:07:00,922 Did you just say you live here? 201 00:07:01,339 --> 00:07:02,673 - Well... - Yeah, she does. 202 00:07:03,215 --> 00:07:06,302 - Oh. - Um, I mean, it's for a gig. 203 00:07:06,385 --> 00:07:08,262 It's temporary. I'm working. Um... 204 00:07:08,346 --> 00:07:10,306 But honestly, it's been so nice 205 00:07:10,389 --> 00:07:11,891 to get out of the LA bubble. 206 00:07:11,974 --> 00:07:14,810 You know what I mean? Just, like, fresh perspective, 207 00:07:14,894 --> 00:07:16,187 be with real people. 208 00:07:16,270 --> 00:07:18,022 It's been, like, gorg, 209 00:07:18,105 --> 00:07:19,106 - amazing. - Right. 210 00:07:19,190 --> 00:07:20,191 - Right. - Right. 211 00:07:20,274 --> 00:07:22,193 Hey, are you guys free tonight? 212 00:07:22,276 --> 00:07:24,156 I would love to hang out. I can show you around. 213 00:07:24,236 --> 00:07:26,322 I've got, like, a lot of spots I love. 214 00:07:26,405 --> 00:07:28,574 We've actually gotta turn in early 215 00:07:28,658 --> 00:07:30,785 'cause we have spa appointments in the morning, so... 216 00:07:30,868 --> 00:07:32,286 Yeah. I'll text you, though. 217 00:07:32,370 --> 00:07:34,789 Okay, yeah. Um, oh! 218 00:07:34,872 --> 00:07:36,058 Just little Vegas life hack for you. 219 00:07:36,082 --> 00:07:38,042 Um, sometimes when old people 220 00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:40,002 are on a roll at a slot machine, 221 00:07:40,086 --> 00:07:42,338 they'll piss and shit themselves in their seat 222 00:07:42,421 --> 00:07:44,173 rather than get up, so... (WHISTLES) 223 00:07:44,256 --> 00:07:45,925 Always look before you sit. (CHUCKLES) 224 00:07:49,845 --> 00:07:52,515 - So good seeing you. - Yeah. 225 00:07:52,598 --> 00:07:54,767 - Thanks for the tip. - (CLEARS THROAT) 226 00:07:58,604 --> 00:07:59,647 (EXHALES) 227 00:07:59,772 --> 00:08:01,816 Uh, here's another toothpaste. 228 00:08:01,899 --> 00:08:04,610 That was so awkward. I feel bad. 229 00:08:04,735 --> 00:08:06,696 (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) 230 00:08:06,779 --> 00:08:08,698 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 231 00:08:14,996 --> 00:08:16,872 (GASPS) Hi, pancake! 232 00:08:17,123 --> 00:08:19,834 - Can we finally hang tonight? - Ooh, can't tonight. 233 00:08:19,917 --> 00:08:21,293 - Tomorrow? - Yeah, yeah. 234 00:08:21,377 --> 00:08:23,129 Hey! Toothpaste girl! 235 00:08:23,796 --> 00:08:26,048 - You know each other? - Yeah, we go way back. 236 00:08:26,132 --> 00:08:27,258 I'm her toothpaste dealer. 237 00:08:27,341 --> 00:08:28,884 Well, you're a terrible dealer. 238 00:08:28,968 --> 00:08:30,177 You didn't even charge me. 239 00:08:30,261 --> 00:08:31,581 Well, the first one's always free. 240 00:08:32,513 --> 00:08:33,889 - I'm George. - Ava. 241 00:08:34,140 --> 00:08:36,892 Well, I think this is a very good omen. 242 00:08:36,976 --> 00:08:39,812 I feel like we're about to win a bunch of money together. 243 00:08:39,895 --> 00:08:41,480 - I'm all in. - He's all in. 244 00:08:41,564 --> 00:08:42,606 (CHUCKLES) 245 00:08:42,690 --> 00:08:44,650 (SIGHS) Okay, Ava. 246 00:08:44,775 --> 00:08:46,294 What do you think? Do you want to hit or stand? 247 00:08:46,318 --> 00:08:48,070 No, no. That's a bad idea. 248 00:08:48,154 --> 00:08:49,297 GEORGE: She's my good luck charm. 249 00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:50,322 I want her to decide. 250 00:08:50,406 --> 00:08:51,991 (CHUCKLES) Um... 251 00:08:53,993 --> 00:08:56,579 Um, Jack is ten? 252 00:08:56,662 --> 00:08:58,831 - Jack's ten. - Two, carry the one... 253 00:08:59,957 --> 00:09:02,835 - Hi... Hit? - Hit. 254 00:09:02,918 --> 00:09:04,146 Come on, come on, come on, come on, 255 00:09:04,170 --> 00:09:05,254 come on, come on! 256 00:09:05,337 --> 00:09:07,465 - Oh! - I told you! 257 00:09:07,548 --> 00:09:09,717 Look, I love her, she's so cute, 258 00:09:09,800 --> 00:09:11,761 she's amazing, but she sucks at blackjack. 259 00:09:11,844 --> 00:09:13,095 Oh, my God, I'm so sorry. 260 00:09:13,179 --> 00:09:15,931 What? Three grand to meet Ava? 261 00:09:16,015 --> 00:09:17,433 Seems worth it to me. 262 00:09:18,100 --> 00:09:21,604 Okay, love that. I do have to ask you 263 00:09:21,687 --> 00:09:23,665 to vacate the table, though, if you're not gonna play. 264 00:09:23,689 --> 00:09:25,107 Oh, yeah, of course. Fair, sorry. 265 00:09:25,191 --> 00:09:27,109 - I'll see you tomorrow. - Tomorrow, promise. 266 00:09:27,193 --> 00:09:28,944 So did I hear you say that you lived here? 267 00:09:29,028 --> 00:09:30,029 That's cool. 268 00:09:30,112 --> 00:09:31,822 Uh, yeah, no, no. 269 00:09:31,906 --> 00:09:33,199 It's really not. 270 00:09:33,282 --> 00:09:35,117 You know how the thing about Vegas is 271 00:09:35,201 --> 00:09:37,119 you come, you party, and then on Sunday morning, 272 00:09:37,203 --> 00:09:38,746 you wanna get home as soon as possible? 273 00:09:38,829 --> 00:09:39,830 Right, yeah. 274 00:09:39,914 --> 00:09:41,165 Well, my entire life 275 00:09:41,248 --> 00:09:42,833 is that Sunday morning, 276 00:09:42,917 --> 00:09:44,168 but I can't leave. 277 00:09:44,877 --> 00:09:46,170 I've never even partied here. 278 00:09:46,253 --> 00:09:48,005 Seriously? 279 00:09:48,089 --> 00:09:49,757 Well, my God. 280 00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:51,151 Then we gotta make up for lost time. 281 00:09:51,175 --> 00:09:53,010 You know that fancy Michelin star restaurant 282 00:09:53,094 --> 00:09:55,179 - that's up on the third floor? - Yeah. 283 00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:57,223 Do you wanna do coke in their bathroom? 284 00:09:58,057 --> 00:09:59,058 (SNIFFS) 285 00:09:59,892 --> 00:10:01,372 - So where are you from? - Originally? 286 00:10:01,560 --> 00:10:02,978 Yarmouth, Massachusetts. 287 00:10:03,062 --> 00:10:04,814 No way! I'm from Waltham. 288 00:10:04,897 --> 00:10:06,649 Look at us! We're both from Mass, 289 00:10:06,732 --> 00:10:08,859 and we love cocaine. What are the odds? 290 00:10:08,943 --> 00:10:10,611 Okay, no, wait, no, wait, no, wait. 291 00:10:10,736 --> 00:10:12,297 Were you a Papa Gino's house or were you a Bertucci's house. 292 00:10:12,321 --> 00:10:14,115 - This is very important. - Papa Gino's. 293 00:10:14,198 --> 00:10:15,741 What am I, made of money? Come on. 294 00:10:15,825 --> 00:10:16,826 (LAUGHS) 295 00:10:16,909 --> 00:10:17,910 (SNIFFS) 296 00:10:17,993 --> 00:10:19,787 You're funny. I would've had such a crush 297 00:10:19,870 --> 00:10:21,038 on you in high school. 298 00:10:21,122 --> 00:10:22,206 (LAUGHS) I don't think so. 299 00:10:22,289 --> 00:10:23,999 I... I wasn't cool in high school. 300 00:10:24,083 --> 00:10:25,334 Mostly because of my name. 301 00:10:25,417 --> 00:10:27,169 Your name? What do you mean? 302 00:10:27,253 --> 00:10:28,879 Oh, um, yeah. 303 00:10:28,963 --> 00:10:30,899 So we'd say certain words backwards so our parents 304 00:10:30,923 --> 00:10:32,150 wouldn't know what we were talking about. 305 00:10:32,174 --> 00:10:33,968 So, like, beer was "reeb," 306 00:10:34,051 --> 00:10:36,011 and all the cool kids had nicknames. 307 00:10:36,095 --> 00:10:38,973 So, like, Jon was "Noj" And Jen S. was "Snej," 308 00:10:39,056 --> 00:10:40,992 and I think a big reason I wasn't cool in high school 309 00:10:41,016 --> 00:10:44,436 was 'cause, you know, Ava backwards is just "Ava." 310 00:10:45,146 --> 00:10:46,915 But wait, why didn't you just use your last initial 311 00:10:46,939 --> 00:10:48,107 like Jen S. did? 312 00:10:48,190 --> 00:10:49,316 (SNIFFS) 313 00:10:49,984 --> 00:10:51,861 - Fuck! - (LAUGHS) 314 00:10:51,944 --> 00:10:53,362 Well, even if I had, 315 00:10:53,445 --> 00:10:55,114 I was still pretty busted in high school. 316 00:10:55,197 --> 00:10:56,424 Nobody told me you weren't supposed to brush 317 00:10:56,448 --> 00:10:58,742 - wavy hair, so... - (SNIFFS) 318 00:10:58,826 --> 00:11:00,870 So, what, you got hot in college, then? 319 00:11:00,953 --> 00:11:03,873 (LAUGHS) No, not that either. 320 00:11:03,956 --> 00:11:05,851 It got a little better when I figured out my birth control 321 00:11:05,875 --> 00:11:07,877 and lost my acne beard, but, uh, 322 00:11:07,960 --> 00:11:10,021 also, I was only in college for, like, two years anyway. 323 00:11:10,045 --> 00:11:11,797 I left early 'cause I got a writing job, 324 00:11:11,881 --> 00:11:14,884 and then that sort of imploded, 325 00:11:14,967 --> 00:11:17,928 and I moved here to work a job that I hate. 326 00:11:18,012 --> 00:11:21,140 Just the sort of classic story. (LAUGHS) 327 00:11:21,223 --> 00:11:24,018 - So you're on birth control? - (LAUGHS) 328 00:11:24,101 --> 00:11:25,561 That's what you got out of all that? 329 00:11:25,644 --> 00:11:27,021 (GIGGLES) No. 330 00:11:27,104 --> 00:11:29,231 I... I got the other stuff, too. 331 00:11:30,024 --> 00:11:31,066 (SNIFFS) 332 00:11:31,150 --> 00:11:32,902 You know, you really don't have to change. 333 00:11:33,986 --> 00:11:36,363 No, if we're going to a Vegas club, 334 00:11:36,614 --> 00:11:38,574 I legally have to wear a highly flammable dress. 335 00:11:38,657 --> 00:11:40,326 - (CHUCKLES) - (LAUGHS) 336 00:11:41,160 --> 00:11:42,536 What's with this TV? 337 00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:44,371 Ugh, I've complained a bunch. 338 00:11:44,455 --> 00:11:46,040 They won't do anything about it. 339 00:11:51,170 --> 00:11:52,630 Well, if they won't do anything... 340 00:11:53,672 --> 00:11:54,715 What are you doing? 341 00:11:55,174 --> 00:11:56,342 (GROANS) 342 00:11:56,842 --> 00:11:58,052 (LAUGHS) 343 00:11:58,135 --> 00:11:59,511 Now they have to fix it. 344 00:12:01,889 --> 00:12:04,391 (GROANS) There. 345 00:12:05,059 --> 00:12:06,161 If you're not happy with something, 346 00:12:06,185 --> 00:12:07,686 you gotta change it, right? 347 00:12:08,270 --> 00:12:09,939 - Yeah. - You ready? 348 00:12:10,022 --> 00:12:11,232 Let's go. 349 00:12:11,523 --> 00:12:13,943 (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) 350 00:12:14,026 --> 00:12:15,945 Yeah, now I just wash all my clothes in the sink 351 00:12:16,028 --> 00:12:18,280 - like an old Italian woman. - (CHUCKLES) 352 00:12:18,364 --> 00:12:19,949 Oh, my God. 353 00:12:20,032 --> 00:12:21,951 - GEORGE: What? - I know those girls. 354 00:12:22,034 --> 00:12:23,386 They said they were going to bed early. 355 00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:25,120 They fucking lied to me. 356 00:12:28,249 --> 00:12:29,541 Oh, hey. 357 00:12:30,292 --> 00:12:32,628 Oh, Ava. Hi. 358 00:12:32,711 --> 00:12:34,338 What happened to spa appointments? 359 00:12:34,755 --> 00:12:36,799 Guess I'm still being punished for my tweet, huh? 360 00:12:36,882 --> 00:12:38,717 My fucking scarlet T. 361 00:12:38,884 --> 00:12:41,804 Dude, nobody cares about your fucking tweet. 362 00:12:42,137 --> 00:12:44,348 You were an asshole before the tweet. 363 00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:46,100 - Excuse me? - Honestly, 364 00:12:46,183 --> 00:12:48,477 we were getting a second wind, and I was gonna text you. 365 00:12:48,560 --> 00:12:50,521 But when I scrolled up on our messages, 366 00:12:50,604 --> 00:12:52,404 the last thing you asked me was for a plus one 367 00:12:52,481 --> 00:12:54,900 to my premiere party, and when I said that I couldn't, 368 00:12:54,984 --> 00:12:57,278 you wrote, "Wow." 369 00:12:57,361 --> 00:12:59,113 Okay, who are you, the court stenographer? 370 00:12:59,196 --> 00:13:00,990 - What the fuck? - Oh, come on, Ava. 371 00:13:01,073 --> 00:13:02,842 Everyone knows you're, like, this career-obsessed... 372 00:13:02,866 --> 00:13:04,535 - Opportunist. - Yes. 373 00:13:04,618 --> 00:13:06,620 So we weren't exactly all rushing to defend you 374 00:13:06,704 --> 00:13:07,997 when everything went down. 375 00:13:08,372 --> 00:13:10,541 Sorry to be so blunt, but we're on coke. 376 00:13:10,916 --> 00:13:13,168 - You guys did coke? - Well, guess what. 377 00:13:13,252 --> 00:13:15,796 I'm on coke, too. And also, fuck you! 378 00:13:15,879 --> 00:13:17,479 You think you're so great 'cause you made 379 00:13:17,506 --> 00:13:20,092 one mediocre indie about lesbians in Oakland? 380 00:13:20,175 --> 00:13:21,677 Let's see what you do next. 381 00:13:21,885 --> 00:13:23,238 I'm actually directing a Marvel movie. 382 00:13:23,262 --> 00:13:26,056 Okay, how does that even make sense? 383 00:13:26,140 --> 00:13:27,850 You know what? Good luck with that. 384 00:13:27,933 --> 00:13:29,810 Kevin loves the direction we're going in, so... 385 00:13:29,893 --> 00:13:31,228 That's great. Well, guess what? 386 00:13:31,312 --> 00:13:32,354 In my next project, 387 00:13:32,438 --> 00:13:33,623 I'm gonna name all the villains 388 00:13:33,647 --> 00:13:35,691 Cat and Jules and Victoria 389 00:13:35,774 --> 00:13:36,817 and fucking... 390 00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:38,068 - Hallie. - Hallie. 391 00:13:39,194 --> 00:13:40,571 GEORGE: Fuck you, Hallie. 392 00:13:41,030 --> 00:13:42,948 (JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING) 393 00:13:43,032 --> 00:13:45,284 Thanks, I know where I'm going. 394 00:13:48,537 --> 00:13:51,290 Oh, they're not here? 395 00:13:51,874 --> 00:13:53,125 Am I early? 396 00:13:53,334 --> 00:13:55,878 That's very funny. They left 20 minutes ago. 397 00:13:56,920 --> 00:14:00,090 They didn't finish the D.O.M.? How rude. 398 00:14:00,174 --> 00:14:01,800 I'm glad I missed them. 399 00:14:01,884 --> 00:14:03,052 Oh, oops. Sorry, sorry, 400 00:14:03,135 --> 00:14:04,887 sorry, sorry. (CHUCKLES) 401 00:14:05,137 --> 00:14:07,306 Okay. You're drunk. 402 00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:11,143 Oh, who are you, my 1950s housewife? 403 00:14:11,435 --> 00:14:13,979 Come on! We're celebrating! 404 00:14:14,063 --> 00:14:17,066 I got my Fridays and Saturdays back from Marty. 405 00:14:17,483 --> 00:14:18,650 All it took was just 406 00:14:18,776 --> 00:14:21,445 a little tiny bit of blackmail. 407 00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:23,906 Greetings! What can I get for you? 408 00:14:23,989 --> 00:14:26,700 Yes! Um, two vodka martinis. Dirty, please. 409 00:14:26,784 --> 00:14:28,660 Just one. I'm not celebrating anything. 410 00:14:28,744 --> 00:14:31,455 No, two. I will have them both. 411 00:14:31,538 --> 00:14:33,040 WAITER: (CHUCKLES) No problem. 412 00:14:33,665 --> 00:14:35,143 Do you know how hard it was to carve out 413 00:14:35,167 --> 00:14:36,668 this Cinchers deal from QVC? 414 00:14:37,461 --> 00:14:39,546 As... As hard as it is to get into them? 415 00:14:39,630 --> 00:14:41,548 - (GIGGLES) - And you blackmailed Marty? 416 00:14:41,965 --> 00:14:43,425 It's a Vegas residency, Deborah, 417 00:14:43,509 --> 00:14:44,968 not an Agatha Christie novel. 418 00:14:45,052 --> 00:14:46,887 - (SNORT) - I have an actual plan. 419 00:14:47,179 --> 00:14:48,806 Oh, please. He loved it! 420 00:14:48,889 --> 00:14:50,700 - He loves this. - You think you can keep Marty 421 00:14:50,724 --> 00:14:51,826 off your back like this forever? 422 00:14:51,850 --> 00:14:54,478 - (SIGHS) - You need to let me set you up for the future, 423 00:14:54,561 --> 00:14:55,562 one without dates. 424 00:14:55,687 --> 00:14:56,688 - No, I... - If... 425 00:14:56,772 --> 00:14:58,732 No one's gonna take my show away from me! 426 00:14:58,857 --> 00:14:59,858 It's my show! 427 00:15:00,192 --> 00:15:03,112 Everything else is just extra. 428 00:15:04,154 --> 00:15:05,406 "Just extra." 429 00:15:06,824 --> 00:15:08,450 Well, then maybe you should listen to Ava 430 00:15:08,534 --> 00:15:10,869 and start actually improving your material. 431 00:15:12,538 --> 00:15:13,539 Have a good night. 432 00:15:17,876 --> 00:15:20,462 - Perfect timing. - I just have to say, 433 00:15:20,879 --> 00:15:23,841 my mother went on your cruise. She's a huge fan. 434 00:15:24,800 --> 00:15:26,635 - What's her name? - Carol. 435 00:15:28,429 --> 00:15:30,514 Carol. Well, here's to Carol. 436 00:15:30,597 --> 00:15:32,224 - I couldn't take a self... - Please. 437 00:15:32,307 --> 00:15:33,350 Yeah, great. 438 00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:40,107 - That was brutal! - Hey, forget about those guys. 439 00:15:40,190 --> 00:15:41,733 Who even likes Marvel movies anyway? 440 00:15:41,942 --> 00:15:44,069 Literally everyone. Fuck! 441 00:15:44,611 --> 00:15:45,737 They're right. 442 00:15:46,029 --> 00:15:48,824 The second I saw them, my first thought was, 443 00:15:48,907 --> 00:15:51,493 "Great, I can use them to network my way back to L.A." 444 00:15:51,910 --> 00:15:54,371 And my boss was right, too. I am a little shit. 445 00:15:55,747 --> 00:15:59,126 I've been, like, obsessed with being cool and popular. 446 00:15:59,209 --> 00:16:01,378 It's fucking pathetic and so basic. 447 00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:04,423 Really? I think you're pretty amazing. 448 00:16:04,590 --> 00:16:05,883 That's 'cause you don't know me. 449 00:16:06,425 --> 00:16:08,025 It only took me three hours to figure out 450 00:16:08,093 --> 00:16:09,219 that you're funny, 451 00:16:10,012 --> 00:16:11,430 you're cool, you're smart. 452 00:16:11,513 --> 00:16:13,474 So you're a little ambitious. So what? 453 00:16:13,891 --> 00:16:15,517 You're in a cutthroat industry. 454 00:16:15,851 --> 00:16:17,662 And you said you had a little success early, right? 455 00:16:17,686 --> 00:16:19,229 They're probably just jealous. 456 00:16:20,731 --> 00:16:23,442 I don't really have friends, George. 457 00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:26,236 I think that's, like, a huge red flag 458 00:16:26,320 --> 00:16:27,738 about me as a human being. 459 00:16:27,946 --> 00:16:29,781 You're born alone, and you die alone. 460 00:16:29,907 --> 00:16:31,408 You don't need anybody else. 461 00:16:31,492 --> 00:16:32,493 I don't know. 462 00:16:32,618 --> 00:16:35,162 (SIGHS) I... I think I might need to change... 463 00:16:37,623 --> 00:16:39,416 My entire personality. 464 00:16:39,541 --> 00:16:40,542 Really? 465 00:16:40,626 --> 00:16:41,746 I mean, technically, changing 466 00:16:41,793 --> 00:16:44,379 your entire personality is an option. 467 00:16:44,713 --> 00:16:46,340 But do you know what the real work is? 468 00:16:46,423 --> 00:16:48,008 The real work is accepting 469 00:16:48,091 --> 00:16:49,551 and loving yourself for who you are 470 00:16:49,635 --> 00:16:51,220 and all the good stuff that you do. 471 00:16:55,307 --> 00:16:57,100 I guess I do some good stuff. 472 00:16:58,393 --> 00:16:59,394 (SNIFFS) 473 00:17:00,020 --> 00:17:01,647 I send money to my parents every month. 474 00:17:01,855 --> 00:17:04,149 See? You're basically Mother Teresa. 475 00:17:04,399 --> 00:17:05,943 My father's in my phone as "Dickhead." 476 00:17:06,026 --> 00:17:07,319 (CHUCKLES) 477 00:17:08,028 --> 00:17:09,029 (SNIFFS) 478 00:17:09,655 --> 00:17:11,949 Look, um, I know two things. 479 00:17:12,991 --> 00:17:16,161 You are a good person, and we need to do some Molly. 480 00:17:19,706 --> 00:17:21,458 (MUSIC PLAYING) 481 00:17:24,127 --> 00:17:25,337 (LAUGHS) 482 00:17:30,842 --> 00:17:33,720 Daydreaming, I stay in the back seat 483 00:17:33,804 --> 00:17:36,557 The slow beat rocks me back to sleep 484 00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:38,976 Keeps me on automatic 485 00:17:44,565 --> 00:17:47,401 Press my face up close against the glass 486 00:17:47,484 --> 00:17:50,112 (BOTH LAUGHING) 487 00:17:50,487 --> 00:17:51,488 Hey, 488 00:17:51,572 --> 00:17:53,323 do you wanna try the club again? 489 00:17:53,407 --> 00:17:55,284 The line was insane last time, 490 00:17:55,367 --> 00:17:57,077 and it's probably gonna be worse now. 491 00:17:59,955 --> 00:18:01,123 You know what? 492 00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:04,084 I think I actually know another way in. 493 00:18:05,544 --> 00:18:06,878 Okay. 494 00:18:06,962 --> 00:18:08,130 (CHUCKLES) 495 00:18:08,213 --> 00:18:11,425 Don't let this go 496 00:18:11,508 --> 00:18:15,762 Don't let the love fade away 497 00:18:18,765 --> 00:18:20,183 Perks of living in a casino. 498 00:18:20,684 --> 00:18:21,935 You come down here a lot? 499 00:18:22,019 --> 00:18:23,228 (LAUGHS) 500 00:18:24,396 --> 00:18:25,397 Deborah? 501 00:18:26,064 --> 00:18:27,065 Ava? 502 00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:28,233 (LAUGHS) 503 00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:30,777 (GASPS) Wow. 504 00:18:30,861 --> 00:18:32,904 I don't think I've ever seen you 505 00:18:33,113 --> 00:18:34,406 not wearing pants. 506 00:18:34,573 --> 00:18:35,616 What, did somebody die? 507 00:18:35,699 --> 00:18:37,367 Yeah, oh, you wanna talk about clothes? 508 00:18:37,451 --> 00:18:38,994 You look like you let a tailor loose 509 00:18:39,077 --> 00:18:40,495 in an antique carpet store, 510 00:18:40,579 --> 00:18:43,040 and I'll have you know I can dress however I want. 511 00:18:43,123 --> 00:18:44,374 Okay? Thank you. 512 00:18:44,458 --> 00:18:46,543 Well, when I was doing stand-up at your age, 513 00:18:46,627 --> 00:18:49,087 I had to wear a dress and heels. 514 00:18:49,171 --> 00:18:51,506 Okay, I'm... I'm sorry I don't have to. 515 00:18:51,590 --> 00:18:53,842 Are you... Are you, like, mad at me about that? 516 00:18:56,386 --> 00:18:57,804 - Yes. - Wait a second. 517 00:18:58,347 --> 00:18:59,348 (CHUCKLES) 518 00:18:59,431 --> 00:19:00,432 You're drunk. 519 00:19:00,724 --> 00:19:02,434 No, I am not. You are. 520 00:19:02,517 --> 00:19:04,436 No, no. I'm on cocaine and Molly. 521 00:19:04,519 --> 00:19:07,731 (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY) Hi, I'm George. Hi. 522 00:19:08,649 --> 00:19:12,778 Oh, what's going on here? 523 00:19:13,195 --> 00:19:14,321 Premarital sex? 524 00:19:14,404 --> 00:19:15,447 - Deborah! - (CHUCKLES) 525 00:19:15,781 --> 00:19:17,491 (WHISPERING) He's cute, good for you. 526 00:19:18,075 --> 00:19:19,076 Oh, 527 00:19:20,285 --> 00:19:21,787 just FYI, 528 00:19:22,079 --> 00:19:24,539 I've heard that she has deeper 529 00:19:24,623 --> 00:19:26,917 sexual experiences with women. 530 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,585 Oh, my God. Okay, 531 00:19:28,669 --> 00:19:31,004 you're my witness. She's my boss. She could be arrested 532 00:19:31,088 --> 00:19:32,673 - for saying that, right? - Oh, please! 533 00:19:32,881 --> 00:19:34,758 Roman Polanski is still feasting 534 00:19:34,841 --> 00:19:36,385 on fois gras in the sixth. 535 00:19:36,468 --> 00:19:38,428 I don't think I'm gonna get busted for saying 536 00:19:38,512 --> 00:19:41,223 my bisexual employee has bi sex. 537 00:19:41,473 --> 00:19:42,516 (CHUCKLES) 538 00:19:42,599 --> 00:19:43,892 Am I? 539 00:19:43,975 --> 00:19:45,060 I... I wouldn't. 540 00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:47,187 Okay, this was fun. 541 00:19:47,979 --> 00:19:49,815 Yeah, okay. Excuse me. 542 00:19:50,357 --> 00:19:53,068 Oh, you don't have your Diva cup in, do you? 543 00:19:53,151 --> 00:19:54,528 - Oh, my God. - (GIGGLES) 544 00:19:57,906 --> 00:19:59,199 Damn, she's pretty rough. 545 00:19:59,282 --> 00:20:00,659 Well, yeah, that was actually 546 00:20:00,742 --> 00:20:02,077 one of our better interactions. 547 00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:03,846 You know, for somebody who doesn't have any friends 548 00:20:03,870 --> 00:20:06,206 in Vegas, you run into a lot of people here. 549 00:20:06,289 --> 00:20:08,208 Yeah, well, too bad none of them like me. 550 00:20:08,291 --> 00:20:09,835 I like you. 551 00:20:11,503 --> 00:20:13,505 (GUITAR MUSIC PLAYING) 552 00:20:15,507 --> 00:20:16,633 Hey, do you, um... 553 00:20:17,592 --> 00:20:18,635 Do you wanna skip the club 554 00:20:18,719 --> 00:20:20,262 and just go up to my room instead? 555 00:20:20,595 --> 00:20:22,889 I absolutely consent. 556 00:20:25,100 --> 00:20:26,435 Oh, um, no. 557 00:20:26,518 --> 00:20:28,103 Your... Your room's actually this way. 558 00:20:28,186 --> 00:20:29,229 Oh, right. 559 00:20:31,898 --> 00:20:33,942 Hey, wait, wait. This is my last $100. 560 00:20:35,026 --> 00:20:36,403 How much did you lose tonight? 561 00:20:36,486 --> 00:20:37,612 Like, 60 grand. 562 00:20:37,696 --> 00:20:39,573 You lost $60,000 tonight? 563 00:20:39,948 --> 00:20:42,617 Yes, but you are going to take my last $100, 564 00:20:42,701 --> 00:20:44,244 - and you're gonna go win. - No. 565 00:20:44,327 --> 00:20:46,305 We have established over the course of this evening 566 00:20:46,329 --> 00:20:48,081 that I am a giant loser. 567 00:20:48,165 --> 00:20:49,875 Ava! Don't say that. 568 00:20:50,208 --> 00:20:52,502 You... You are a winner. 569 00:20:53,670 --> 00:20:55,505 So I want you to take this money 570 00:20:55,630 --> 00:20:57,215 and pick something really special. 571 00:20:58,550 --> 00:20:59,551 And go win. 572 00:21:04,222 --> 00:21:05,724 I know the perfect game. 573 00:21:06,141 --> 00:21:09,644 AUTOMATED VOICE: All righty, then! 574 00:21:09,728 --> 00:21:11,855 (LAUGHS) 575 00:21:12,147 --> 00:21:14,149 Do not go in there! 576 00:21:14,232 --> 00:21:15,275 Whoo! 577 00:21:15,859 --> 00:21:18,695 Coach, just give me a chance! 578 00:21:23,241 --> 00:21:27,078 All righty, then. All righty, then. 579 00:21:27,162 --> 00:21:29,164 (GASPS) Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 580 00:21:29,247 --> 00:21:30,415 (DINGING) 581 00:21:30,499 --> 00:21:31,917 Oh, my God! 582 00:21:32,417 --> 00:21:33,877 Holy shit! 583 00:21:35,837 --> 00:21:37,422 (MUSIC PLAYING) 584 00:22:14,042 --> 00:22:15,210 Do you want the last reeb? 585 00:22:15,669 --> 00:22:17,504 Huh? Oh, beer. 586 00:22:17,587 --> 00:22:18,797 (CHUCKLES) Yes, good. 587 00:22:19,756 --> 00:22:20,757 (SIGHS) 588 00:22:21,132 --> 00:22:23,176 I still can't believe I won. God! 589 00:22:23,260 --> 00:22:27,180 It's like I'm almost not even a lahoo-suh-herr anymore. 590 00:22:27,264 --> 00:22:29,724 Sorry, that was not hot. Sorry. 591 00:22:29,808 --> 00:22:31,393 Oh, tomorrow morning, we should go 592 00:22:31,476 --> 00:22:33,287 to The Mirage next door and get the breakfast sandwiches. 593 00:22:33,311 --> 00:22:35,122 It's literally the only good thing about living here. 594 00:22:35,146 --> 00:22:36,940 - Yeah, sure. - (SIGHING) Oh, my God! 595 00:22:37,023 --> 00:22:39,651 This is the first night I've had any fun here. 596 00:22:39,985 --> 00:22:43,071 At all. I just, like, hate my job. 597 00:22:43,154 --> 00:22:45,299 Well, then I think you gotta do something about it, right? 598 00:22:45,323 --> 00:22:46,908 Should I rip the TV off the wall? 599 00:22:46,992 --> 00:22:48,243 I've done so much cocaine. 600 00:22:48,326 --> 00:22:50,012 - I really think I could. - No, I just mean, 601 00:22:50,036 --> 00:22:51,788 if there's something that is in your life 602 00:22:51,872 --> 00:22:55,083 that you don't like that you know that is not working, 603 00:22:55,166 --> 00:22:56,418 you need to change it, you know? 604 00:22:56,501 --> 00:22:58,420 You can't just let it go. Like your boss. 605 00:22:58,712 --> 00:23:00,356 If that was a good interaction between you two, 606 00:23:00,380 --> 00:23:02,090 then you are in an abusive relationship. 607 00:23:02,173 --> 00:23:05,051 I wanna quit, but I clearly have no options 608 00:23:05,135 --> 00:23:06,761 back in L.A. I mean, you saw those girls. 609 00:23:06,845 --> 00:23:08,388 They want nothing to do with me. 610 00:23:08,471 --> 00:23:10,974 - They fucking hate me. - But fuck those L.A. girls! 611 00:23:11,057 --> 00:23:13,018 And you don't need your shitty boss either. 612 00:23:13,226 --> 00:23:14,436 You're an artist. 613 00:23:14,769 --> 00:23:15,770 You're a writer. 614 00:23:15,854 --> 00:23:17,689 You just need yourself, you know? 615 00:23:18,273 --> 00:23:19,900 And this pen. 616 00:23:19,983 --> 00:23:21,693 That's my vape. But you know what? 617 00:23:21,776 --> 00:23:22,986 You're right. You're right. 618 00:23:23,069 --> 00:23:24,946 Why the fuck am I wasting my life here? 619 00:23:25,030 --> 00:23:26,114 So I can't go back to L.A., 620 00:23:26,197 --> 00:23:27,741 whatever. I... I'm still a writer. 621 00:23:27,824 --> 00:23:29,135 I can write anything from anywhere. 622 00:23:29,159 --> 00:23:30,619 I could get a cabin! 623 00:23:30,702 --> 00:23:32,704 Joan Didion did that one time, I think. 624 00:23:32,787 --> 00:23:33,997 Yes, see! 625 00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:35,832 Yes! That's what I mean, you know? 626 00:23:35,916 --> 00:23:37,417 There can't be any rules. 627 00:23:37,500 --> 00:23:38,835 You have to go and do your art. 628 00:23:38,919 --> 00:23:40,128 - I'm gonna quit. - Yeah? 629 00:23:40,211 --> 00:23:41,811 - I'm gonna quit! - I wanna see you quit! 630 00:23:41,880 --> 00:23:43,089 - I'm quitting now! - Go quit! 631 00:23:43,173 --> 00:23:44,841 - I'm gonna... Okay. - Just go quit, 632 00:23:44,925 --> 00:23:46,685 because you know what? Sometimes the universe 633 00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:49,095 gives you a path, and you say, "I'm gonna fucking jump," 634 00:23:49,179 --> 00:23:50,931 and the net will appear. Right? 635 00:23:51,014 --> 00:23:53,183 - (SNIFFS) - Am I sweating? 636 00:23:53,808 --> 00:23:54,976 (LINE RINGING) 637 00:23:55,060 --> 00:23:56,120 You've reached Deborah Vance. 638 00:23:56,144 --> 00:23:57,145 Leave a message. 639 00:23:57,228 --> 00:23:58,229 (LINE BEEPS) 640 00:23:58,563 --> 00:23:59,814 Hey, it's Ava. 641 00:23:59,898 --> 00:24:01,983 So I don't think this is gonna work out, 642 00:24:02,067 --> 00:24:03,652 'cause you treat me like shit. 643 00:24:03,735 --> 00:24:05,654 And also, you don't need a writer. 644 00:24:05,737 --> 00:24:08,031 You need a psychiatrist, 'cause you're fucking crazy! 645 00:24:08,114 --> 00:24:10,034 And I hate calling women crazy, but in this case, 646 00:24:10,075 --> 00:24:11,701 it applies, 'cause you actually are. 647 00:24:11,785 --> 00:24:13,620 So, yeah. I quit! 648 00:24:13,703 --> 00:24:15,222 Why don't you get yourself a book on attachment theory 649 00:24:15,246 --> 00:24:16,873 and a bottle of Ativan? 650 00:24:16,957 --> 00:24:18,708 Fucking goodbye! 651 00:24:18,792 --> 00:24:20,752 - Oh, whoo! - Yes! 652 00:24:20,835 --> 00:24:22,104 - That felt so good! - Holy fucking shit! 653 00:24:22,128 --> 00:24:24,172 - That was amazing! - Oh, my God. 654 00:24:24,255 --> 00:24:25,715 You are so fucking incredible. 655 00:24:25,799 --> 00:24:26,901 Oh, that felt good. These drugs are good. 656 00:24:26,925 --> 00:24:28,385 I know. They're really good, 657 00:24:28,468 --> 00:24:30,279 which is awesome, because it can be a crapshoot 658 00:24:30,303 --> 00:24:31,447 when you buy from a homeless guy. 659 00:24:31,471 --> 00:24:32,931 Wait, what? First of all, 660 00:24:33,014 --> 00:24:35,767 they're unhoused residents. That is scary, though. 661 00:24:35,850 --> 00:24:36,977 GEORGE: You're incredible. 662 00:24:37,060 --> 00:24:39,062 (TYPING) 663 00:24:43,900 --> 00:24:45,151 You still awake? 664 00:24:45,235 --> 00:24:48,113 Yep, I'm writing something really good. 665 00:24:53,034 --> 00:24:54,577 (WHISPERING) This will sell. 666 00:24:55,537 --> 00:24:57,539 (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING) 667 00:25:25,650 --> 00:25:27,861 (CELL PHONE RINGING) 668 00:25:29,029 --> 00:25:31,072 - Hi, Jimmy. - Hey. 669 00:25:31,781 --> 00:25:33,199 Was your email hacked? 670 00:25:33,491 --> 00:25:35,076 Uh, I don't think so. 671 00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:37,120 JIMMY: Ugh, no. I was really hoping it was. 672 00:25:37,203 --> 00:25:38,788 You sent me an email at 4:00 a.m. 673 00:25:38,872 --> 00:25:40,141 The subject was "Potential Franchise," 674 00:25:40,165 --> 00:25:42,042 and it was just one very long sentence. 675 00:25:42,125 --> 00:25:46,671 It said, "What if first girl band during Salem witch trials 676 00:25:46,755 --> 00:25:48,173 "but prestige drama." 677 00:25:48,423 --> 00:25:50,425 No punctuation. Very hard to follow. 678 00:25:50,508 --> 00:25:52,093 - Huh. - Yeah, huh. 679 00:25:52,177 --> 00:25:53,779 And then you sent me a whole another email 680 00:25:53,803 --> 00:25:54,864 with a list of names that included 681 00:25:54,888 --> 00:25:56,222 Glenn Close and Ashley Olsen. 682 00:25:56,514 --> 00:25:57,807 Is that the Olsen you meant? 683 00:25:57,891 --> 00:25:58,975 Yeah, let me give that 684 00:25:59,059 --> 00:26:00,602 a reread before you send it out. 685 00:26:00,852 --> 00:26:02,729 Hmm, not something I'm on the verge of doing. 686 00:26:02,812 --> 00:26:04,439 - Don't you worry. - Sorry, you gotta use 687 00:26:04,522 --> 00:26:06,483 the side entrance. Someone just jumped. 688 00:26:07,859 --> 00:26:09,319 Jimmy, let me call you back. 689 00:26:09,986 --> 00:26:12,280 Jumped? Jesus. 690 00:26:12,447 --> 00:26:14,824 Yeah, happens all the time. People come here, 691 00:26:14,908 --> 00:26:17,452 blow all their money on drugs and hookers, 692 00:26:17,535 --> 00:26:19,162 live it up, and then boom! (CLAPS) 693 00:26:19,245 --> 00:26:21,956 You gotta get a wet vac. It's a mess. 694 00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:23,625 So you're gonna have to go that way. 695 00:26:23,708 --> 00:26:24,709 Turn around. 696 00:26:25,251 --> 00:26:26,461 Yeah. 697 00:26:27,420 --> 00:26:29,422 (MUSIC INCREASES IN TEMPO) 698 00:26:37,472 --> 00:26:39,474 (DUB-STEP MUSIC PLAYING) 699 00:26:59,369 --> 00:27:01,788 (WIND BLOWING) 700 00:27:08,086 --> 00:27:09,254 AVA: No, he... 701 00:27:10,755 --> 00:27:12,674 He didn't mention much of anything 702 00:27:12,757 --> 00:27:15,343 because I... I talked about myself the whole night, 703 00:27:15,593 --> 00:27:17,095 because I fucking suck. Um... 704 00:27:19,305 --> 00:27:22,100 He was a Papa Gino's guy. I... 705 00:27:22,433 --> 00:27:23,768 Okay. 706 00:27:23,852 --> 00:27:26,020 Well, let us know if you think of anything. 707 00:27:26,437 --> 00:27:29,190 Looks like he skipped town after he was found guilty 708 00:27:29,274 --> 00:27:31,234 of defrauding a bunch of elderly people. 709 00:27:31,484 --> 00:27:32,944 Elder fraud? 710 00:27:33,444 --> 00:27:35,989 Yeah. You have our info, so... 711 00:27:40,618 --> 00:27:42,036 (CELL PHONE VIBRATING) 712 00:27:46,124 --> 00:27:47,292 Oh, fuck. 713 00:27:47,834 --> 00:27:49,836 (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) 714 00:27:51,796 --> 00:27:52,964 (HORNS HONKING) 715 00:27:53,047 --> 00:27:55,675 (TIRES SCREECHING) 716 00:27:57,886 --> 00:27:58,928 Call Deborah Vance. 717 00:27:59,012 --> 00:28:00,722 (PHONE RINGING) 718 00:28:00,805 --> 00:28:01,991 DEBORAH: You've reached Deborah Vance. 719 00:28:02,015 --> 00:28:04,017 - Leave a message. - (LINE BEEPS) 720 00:28:04,100 --> 00:28:05,660 Deborah, if you're getting this message, 721 00:28:05,685 --> 00:28:07,687 please disregard my message last night. 722 00:28:07,770 --> 00:28:09,105 I... I did not mean any of that. 723 00:28:09,189 --> 00:28:11,024 I got some really bad advice. 724 00:28:11,566 --> 00:28:13,234 I'm on my way to explain in person. 725 00:28:14,819 --> 00:28:16,070 End call. 726 00:28:16,362 --> 00:28:17,739 (SOBBING) 727 00:28:20,241 --> 00:28:21,826 Oh, Marcus. You're not coming. 728 00:28:22,160 --> 00:28:23,760 - Excuse me? - Well, since you're so sure 729 00:28:23,786 --> 00:28:25,413 that I need to work on my material, 730 00:28:25,496 --> 00:28:26,974 that's what I'm gonna spend the weekend doing. 731 00:28:26,998 --> 00:28:29,292 Ava and I are gonna have a little writer's retreat. 732 00:28:29,375 --> 00:28:30,835 - Mm. - Oh, and would you mind 733 00:28:30,919 --> 00:28:32,921 making sure that Barry takes his heartworm pills? 734 00:28:33,213 --> 00:28:34,422 Thank you. 735 00:28:37,508 --> 00:28:38,968 - Deborah, I... - DEBORAH: Jesus! 736 00:28:39,177 --> 00:28:41,179 I said I liked the dress, not that you have 737 00:28:41,262 --> 00:28:43,765 to wear it every day. But good timing. 738 00:28:43,848 --> 00:28:44,933 You are coming with me. 739 00:28:45,016 --> 00:28:46,559 What? Wait, where are we going? 740 00:28:46,643 --> 00:28:48,394 You're going on the retreat instead. 741 00:28:48,478 --> 00:28:50,372 I'm actually getting a little eyelid maintenance, 742 00:28:50,396 --> 00:28:51,957 but maybe we can do a little bit of work, you know, 743 00:28:51,981 --> 00:28:53,107 while I'm recovering. 744 00:28:53,191 --> 00:28:55,610 Josefina, did you ever find my phone? 745 00:28:55,777 --> 00:28:56,778 Ah. 746 00:28:56,861 --> 00:28:58,696 It was on the toilet. 747 00:28:59,030 --> 00:29:00,240 Thank you. 748 00:29:00,865 --> 00:29:02,200 Anyway, my appointment's at noon. 749 00:29:02,283 --> 00:29:04,619 Hope you don't mind a little blood. 750 00:29:08,331 --> 00:29:10,792 Let's go! Move your ass!