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[theme music]

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[telephone ringing]

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(Ranger Smith) 'Ranger station, Jellystone Park'

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'Chief Ranger Smith speaking.'

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A couple of bears headed for the picnic area?

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A big fat one, and a little cute one, huh?

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Well, thanks. I'll check on it right away.

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Yogi and Boo-Boo, no doubt.

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Boo-Boo, look at that beautiful sight.

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(Yogi) 'A happy tourist group with loads of goodies on the table.'

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What are you putting the ribbon on for, Yogi?

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I am the self-appointed ambassador of goodwill, Boob.

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The ranger won't like it, Yogi.

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As ambassador, I shall enjoy

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diplomatic immunity to trivial rules.

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If the tourists offer me some goodies

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as ambassador, I shall be forced to take 'em.

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You better not do it, Yogi.

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chomp chomp

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(Yogi) 'Greetings, fine people.'

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And welcome to Jellystone Park.

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You will see some signs around about

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uh, not feedin' the bears.

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But this rule does not apply to me.

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John, get rid of that dusty animal.

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He's shedding.

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We'll have bear hairs in our food.

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Hey, bear, beat it. Get lost.

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Dismissing an ambassador

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breaks off diplomatic relations, sir.

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That's not all that'll be broken if you don't beat it.

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Perhaps I could chop some wood for a handout.

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(John) 'Beat it.'

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Polish your car? Wash the dishes?

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Don't argue with him, John. Call the ranger.

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Never mind, John. I got the message.

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And I'm leavin'.

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Come on, Yogi.

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Let's leave before the ranger catches you.

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Not yet, Boob. I will pull my surefire act on 'em.

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Not the starving bear routine.

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(Yogi) 'It hardly never fails. Watch.'

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[humming]

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Sam, look at that bear.

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Help. He-e-elp.

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I'm starving. I need nourishment.

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I haven't eaten for weeks.

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thud

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(Yogi) 'A bowl of broth, a pizza pie, a roast chicken.'

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I just gotta get some food in my shrunken stomach.

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Gosh. This is embarrassing.

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They spend billions on missiles, but not a penny on us.

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'Bears don't need missiles.'

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They need morsels.

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[sobbing]

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Huh?

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Khaki pants.

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[Yogi gulps]

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'Mr. Ranger, sir.'

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- Get up, Yogi, and follow me. - 'Yes, sir.'

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I have never seen such a craven

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degrading exhibition in my life.

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A descendent of the noble bears

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of the forest debasing himself

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'begging for food.'

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Bears used to be proud, independent.

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They spurned man's food.

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(Ranger Smith) 'They went into the forests and got their own food.'

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Go, Yogi.

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Go back to nature, before it's too late.

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You are right, Mr. Ranger, sir.

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If bears live for a 1000 years

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they shall say that this  was their finest hour.

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[chuckles] Oh, Yogi went for that guff, hook, line, and sinker.

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[chuckles]

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Gee, Yogi, we're noble, independent bears

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searching for food as nature intended, melding into..

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What's the matter, Yogi?

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Boo Boo, don't tell me you went for that stuff

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the ranger fed us.

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Sure, Yogi.

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We've become spoiled by man's food.

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We've gone soft.

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You mean you've gone soft, in the head.

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Boob, I've been neglecting your education

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'so lets you and I sit down and, uh, have a talk.'

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The time has come when we have to discuss

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the facts of life, Boob.

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What do you wanna know, Yogi?

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You've heard of the birds and bees, haven't you, Boob?

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Sure. There's a bee now, Yogi.

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[buzzing]

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(Yogi) 'You mean, there was a bee, Boo-Boo.'

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[growling]

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whir

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If you believe everything you hear, Boo-Boo

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you're bound to get stung.

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[bee whirring]

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Yowch!

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crash

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Are you okay, Yogi?

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As okay as possible, with a bee harpoon in me.

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What's this?

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slurp

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(Boo-Boo) 'What is it, Yogi?'

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It's honey. The log is full of it.

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Gee. We found our own food.

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- Let's eat some, Yogi. - Nothin' doin', Boob.

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- I got a better idea. - Oh, no, Yogi. Please.

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Keep going, Boob.

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We're almost to the highway.

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[engine sputtering]

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Hey, dad, what do those signs say?

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(male 1) '"When you eat beneath the trees'

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'eat Yogi's honey from contented bees."'

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Let's get some, Henry.

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There's the place up ahead.

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screech

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That's right, lady. It's the barter system.

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A jar of honey for a piece of pie

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'hot dog, or what have you.'

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(Yogi) 'Keep fillin' 'em up, Boo-Boo.'

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That's right. I'm the health inspector.

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And this honey that bear is selling

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in these secondhand bottles isn't healthy.

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(male 2) 'They're full of ants, twigs, bits of leaves, and bark.'

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You better stop this pinchpenny racket of yours or else.

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'Good day, sir.'

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Yogi.

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You need no money to buy my honey.

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The ranger wouldn't like this.

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Don't make me laugh, Boob.

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You know I'm smarter than the average ranger.

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[laughing]

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I'll take a jar.

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Mr. Ranger, sir.

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Keep going, Yogi.

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I want it put back right where you found it.

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Let that be a lesson to you, Yogi.

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And remember one thing..

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He who laughs last, laughs best.

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[laughing]

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whir

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[laughing]

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Yowch!

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'I've been stung!'

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You know somethin', Boob?

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Mr. Ranger is right.

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Hey, hey. Yeah-ay-aye.

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[theme music]