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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:41,800 -> 00:00:44,408 It was the nicest little whorehouse you ever saw. 2 00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:55,900 It lay about a mile outside the city limits, 3 00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:57,545 so everybody could feel real friendly. 4 00:00:58,300 --> 00:01:02,638 Sheriff Jack Roy Wallace picked it out for Miss Wulla Jean in 1910, 5 00:01:02,754 --> 00:01:04,802 and she moved there with her girls from over 6 00:01:04,882 --> 00:01:07,135 the hardware store on Main Street. 7 00:01:09,344 --> 00:01:12,143 ♪ The little house lay 8 00:01:12,222 --> 00:01:15,317 ♪ In a green Texas glade 9 00:01:15,392 --> 00:01:18,987 ♪ Where the trees were as coolin' 10 00:01:19,062 --> 00:01:21,611 ♪ As fresh lemonade 11 00:01:22,232 --> 00:01:24,326 ♪ Soft summer wind 12 00:01:24,401 --> 00:01:27,530 ♪ Had a trace of perfume 13 00:01:27,613 --> 00:01:30,583 ♪ And a fan was turnin' 14 00:01:30,657 --> 00:01:32,910 ♪ In every room 15 00:01:32,993 --> 00:01:36,418 ♪ 20 fans were turnin' They were turnin' 16 00:01:36,497 --> 00:01:38,920 ♪ 20 fans were turnin' in every room 17 00:01:38,999 --> 00:01:42,674 ♪ Fevers were a-burnin' They were burnin' 18 00:01:42,753 --> 00:01:45,757 ♪ And they had to have a way to cool down 19 00:01:53,680 --> 00:01:55,023 FRED". Right from the beginning, 20 00:01:55,098 --> 00:01:57,066 the little house was kinda special, 21 00:01:57,142 --> 00:01:59,361 like a home away from home. 22 00:01:59,436 --> 00:02:01,530 Miss Wulla Jean put a pianola in the 23 00:02:01,605 --> 00:02:04,074 parlor to sorta help break the ice. 24 00:02:04,149 --> 00:02:06,243 A feller could ask a girl to dance, 25 00:02:06,318 --> 00:02:09,162 or if he held back a little, she'd ask him. 26 00:02:09,238 --> 00:02:12,242 And pretty soon they'd get a little business goin'. 27 00:02:12,324 --> 00:02:13,951 Two dollars' worth. 28 00:02:14,535 --> 00:02:15,912 Yah-hoo! 29 00:02:16,745 --> 00:02:18,588 It wasn't long before the place became 30 00:02:18,664 --> 00:02:22,089 one of the better known pleasure palaces in all of Texas. 31 00:02:22,167 --> 00:02:25,717 So much so that the fellers who visited during World War I 32 00:02:25,796 --> 00:02:28,424 sent their sons back in World War ll. 33 00:02:29,216 --> 00:02:32,265 The hospitality and friendliness never changed, 34 00:02:32,344 --> 00:02:35,097 and neither did Miss Wulla Jean's strict set of rules. 35 00:02:35,514 --> 00:02:37,733 She liked her ladies, as she called 'em, 36 00:02:37,933 --> 00:02:40,356 to treat her customers real good, 37 00:02:40,519 --> 00:02:42,942 but never in an unladylike way. 38 00:02:45,482 --> 00:02:47,701 And she insisted that each girl 39 00:02:47,776 --> 00:02:50,029 check her gentleman for the clap 40 00:02:50,112 --> 00:02:53,161 and wash him off with soap and warm water. 41 00:02:53,240 --> 00:02:56,585 Some of the fellers claimed that that was the best part! 42 00:03:01,999 --> 00:03:04,127 It was only during the Hoover depression 43 00:03:04,209 --> 00:03:06,678 that the little house had a spell of tough times. 44 00:03:07,462 --> 00:03:10,306 Miss Wulla Jean put in a jukebox to spark up business. 45 00:03:11,133 --> 00:03:14,512 But it wasn't always easy in them days to come up with hard cash. 46 00:03:17,180 --> 00:03:20,104 Well... You just keep that in the bag, 47 00:03:20,183 --> 00:03:23,437 and I'll take it out back as soon as we're finished. 48 00:03:26,565 --> 00:03:29,364 So fora while, as the story goes, 49 00:03:29,443 --> 00:03:32,367 the girls began accepting poultry in trade. 50 00:03:32,446 --> 00:03:34,619 One bird, one lay. 51 00:03:34,698 --> 00:03:37,076 And that's how the place got its name. 52 00:03:37,576 --> 00:03:39,499 The Chicken Ranch. 53 00:03:43,290 --> 00:03:45,918 Of course, if you grew up anywhere in Texas, 54 00:03:46,001 --> 00:03:49,722 you knew at an early age they was sellin' somethin' out there, 55 00:03:49,796 --> 00:03:51,844 and it wasn't poultry. 56 00:04:14,279 --> 00:04:15,906 ♪ 20 fans were turnin' They were turnin' 57 00:04:15,989 --> 00:04:18,458 ♪ 20 fans were turnin' in every room 58 00:04:18,533 --> 00:04:20,831 ♪ Fevers were a-burnin' They were burnin' 59 00:04:20,911 --> 00:04:22,913 ♪ And they had to have a way to cool down 60 00:04:22,996 --> 00:04:24,873 ♪ 20 fans were hummin' They were hummin' 61 00:04:24,956 --> 00:04:27,004 ♪ 20 fans were hummin' in every room 62 00:04:27,167 --> 00:04:29,511 ♪ Customers were comin' They were comin' 63 00:04:29,586 --> 00:04:31,588 ♪ And they had to have a way to cool down 64 00:04:59,449 --> 00:05:01,543 ♪ 20 fans were turnin' They were turnin' 65 00:05:01,618 --> 00:05:03,666 ♪ 20 fans were turnin' in every room 66 00:05:03,745 --> 00:05:06,168 ♪ Fevers were a-burnin' They were burnin' 67 00:05:06,248 --> 00:05:08,376 ♪ And they had to have a way to cool down 68 00:05:08,458 --> 00:05:10,381 ♪ 20 fans were hummin' They were hummin' 69 00:05:10,460 --> 00:05:12,554 ♪ 20 fans were hummin' in every room 70 00:05:12,629 --> 00:05:14,882 ♪ Customers were comin' They were comin' 71 00:05:14,965 --> 00:05:18,310 ♪ And they had to have a way to cool down 72 00:05:19,845 --> 00:05:21,768 Y'all come back now, you hear? 73 00:05:24,558 --> 00:05:25,605 Yah-hoo! 74 00:05:25,684 --> 00:05:27,402 ♪ 20 fans were turnin' They were turnin' 75 00:05:27,477 --> 00:05:28,899 ♪ 20 fans were turnin' in every room 76 00:05:28,979 --> 00:05:30,777 ♪ Fevers were a-burnin' They were burnin' 77 00:05:30,856 --> 00:05:32,654 ♪ And they had to have a way to cool down 78 00:05:45,203 --> 00:05:46,921 ♪ 20 fans were turnin' They were turnin' 79 00:05:46,997 --> 00:05:48,590 ♪ 20 fans were turnin' in every room 80 00:05:48,665 --> 00:05:50,759 ♪ Fevers were a-burnin' They were burnin' 81 00:05:50,834 --> 00:05:54,384 ♪ And they had to have a way to cool down 82 00:05:54,463 --> 00:05:59,640 ♪ Hallelujah. Hallelujah 83 00:06:15,776 --> 00:06:17,653 So, for over three generations, 84 00:06:17,778 --> 00:06:20,281 the Chicken Ranch went peacefully about its business, 85 00:06:20,363 --> 00:06:22,957 while the people here in Gilbert went about theirs. 86 00:06:23,200 --> 00:06:26,670 That is, until about seven years ago. 87 00:06:28,371 --> 00:06:30,214 I was a deputy back then, 88 00:06:30,290 --> 00:06:32,418 workin' for Sheriff Ed Earl Dodd. 89 00:06:32,793 --> 00:06:35,467 You wanted me to remind you about your 2:00 appointment. 90 00:06:35,754 --> 00:06:37,222 FRED". That was right after I had 91 00:06:37,297 --> 00:06:39,641 lost the fried chicken franchise here in town, 92 00:06:39,716 --> 00:06:41,309 while Ed Earl had been Sheriff ever 93 00:06:41,384 --> 00:06:43,557 since old Jack Roy Wallace retired. 94 00:06:44,846 --> 00:06:46,814 Everybody liked Ed Earl, 95 00:06:47,098 --> 00:06:48,850 especially Ed Earl. 96 00:06:50,894 --> 00:06:52,771 Course, he sure did know his job, 97 00:06:53,104 --> 00:06:55,152 and he was a big influence on me, 98 00:06:55,440 --> 00:06:57,568 taught me everything I know. 99 00:06:58,652 --> 00:07:00,746 He used to like to run a quiet town, 100 00:07:01,071 --> 00:07:03,290 with plenty of time off for socializin' 101 00:07:03,365 --> 00:07:05,834 and coffee over at Dulcie Mae's cafe. 102 00:07:06,326 --> 00:07:08,169 Now and again there'd be a problem, 103 00:07:08,411 --> 00:07:10,491 and we had some tough ones. Right in front of my car! 104 00:07:10,580 --> 00:07:13,129 Like the time the mule sat on Miss Modene's car. 105 00:07:13,250 --> 00:07:15,844 He just buckled up his legs and sat right down! 106 00:07:16,503 --> 00:07:18,426 She was really havin' a hissy fit, 107 00:07:18,755 --> 00:07:20,723 but it didn't faze Ed Earl. 108 00:07:20,799 --> 00:07:24,019 He just walked over to that jackass and laid down the law. 109 00:07:25,262 --> 00:07:28,106 You see, Ed Earl always believed in talkin' first. 110 00:07:28,890 --> 00:07:31,985 Cool reasonin', he used to tell me, could solve any problem. 111 00:07:33,228 --> 00:07:34,901 Course he did have a bit of a temper. 112 00:07:41,486 --> 00:07:44,365 Anyway, just about the time he became sheriff, 113 00:07:44,573 --> 00:07:46,325 Miss Wulla Jean passed on. 114 00:07:46,783 --> 00:07:50,879 She left the Chicken Ranch to her favorite workin' girl, Mona Stangley, 115 00:07:51,246 --> 00:07:54,420 who saw the little house as a Texas institution 116 00:07:54,583 --> 00:07:56,802 and aimed to keep it that way. 117 00:08:16,813 --> 00:08:19,441 ♪ It's just a 118 00:08:19,608 --> 00:08:24,159 ♪ Little bitty pissant country place 119 00:08:25,155 --> 00:08:27,999 ♪ Ain't nothin' much to see 120 00:08:28,700 --> 00:08:31,203 ♪ No drinkin' allowed 121 00:08:31,411 --> 00:08:33,664 ♪ We get a nice, quiet crowd 122 00:08:34,497 --> 00:08:37,091 ♪ Plain as it can be 123 00:08:37,167 --> 00:08:39,886 ♪ It's just a piddly, squattin' 124 00:08:39,961 --> 00:08:43,340 ♪ Old-time country place 125 00:08:44,507 --> 00:08:47,431 ♪ Ain't nothin' too high-toned 126 00:08:48,345 --> 00:08:51,098 ♪ Just lots of goodwill 127 00:08:51,431 --> 00:08:53,729 ♪ And maybe one small thrill 128 00:08:54,601 --> 00:08:57,354 ♪ But there's nothin' dirty goin' on 129 00:08:57,979 --> 00:09:00,152 ♪ Nothin' dirty goin' on 130 00:09:00,315 --> 00:09:04,536 ♪ We get simple farmers Local businessmen 131 00:09:05,195 --> 00:09:09,450 ♪ Congress folks from Austin Young boys lookin' for sin 132 00:09:09,532 --> 00:09:11,910 ♪ Now, we used to get a lot of roughnecks 133 00:09:11,993 --> 00:09:14,121 ♪ When the oil boom was high 134 00:09:14,245 --> 00:09:16,589 ♪ But payday'd get a little rowdy 135 00:09:16,665 --> 00:09:18,963 ♪ Thank God the field run dry 136 00:09:19,042 --> 00:09:22,091 ♪ It's just a little bitty pissant country place 137 00:09:22,170 --> 00:09:23,968 ♪ Nothin' much to see 138 00:09:24,172 --> 00:09:26,971 ♪ No drinkin' allowed We get a nice, quiet crowd 139 00:09:27,050 --> 00:09:28,802 ♪ Plain as it can be 140 00:09:28,885 --> 00:09:31,934 ♪ It's just a piddly, squattin' old-time country place 141 00:09:32,097 --> 00:09:34,065 ♪ Nothin' too high-toned 142 00:09:34,140 --> 00:09:36,313 ♪ Just lots of goodwill and maybe one small thrill 143 00:09:36,393 --> 00:09:38,862 ♪ But there's nothin' dirty goin' on 144 00:09:39,229 --> 00:09:41,732 ♪ Keep your language clean, girls 145 00:09:41,815 --> 00:09:44,034 ♪ Keep your bedrooms neat 146 00:09:44,109 --> 00:09:46,532 ♪ And don't hang around the town cafe 147 00:09:46,611 --> 00:09:48,488 ♪ And say hi on the street 148 00:09:48,571 --> 00:09:50,824 ♪ Mind your Ps & Qs and manners 149 00:09:50,907 --> 00:09:53,501 ♪ And you don't need no other tools 150 00:09:53,660 --> 00:09:58,257 ♪ 'Cause every girl that lives here knows my special no-no rules 151 00:09:58,498 --> 00:10:00,375 ♪ Yeah, every girl that lives here 152 00:10:00,458 --> 00:10:02,711 ♪ knows Miss Mona's no-no rules 153 00:10:02,794 --> 00:10:04,262 Ruby Rae, start 'em. 154 00:10:04,337 --> 00:10:05,964 ♪ Beds are not to be wallowed in 155 00:10:06,047 --> 00:10:08,516 ♪ That's the kind of thing that big, fat, lazy hogs do 156 00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:10,552 And it don't make money. Beatrice? 157 00:10:10,635 --> 00:10:12,478 ♪ And I won't tolerate no tyin' up my 158 00:10:12,554 --> 00:10:15,558 ♪ telephone with other people's business 159 00:10:15,849 --> 00:10:17,476 Eloise, honey? 160 00:10:17,559 --> 00:10:19,607 ♪ And please don't show us no tattoos 161 00:10:19,686 --> 00:10:22,235 ♪ No hearts and flowers on your thigh 162 00:10:22,355 --> 00:10:24,153 It's downright tacky. 163 00:10:24,774 --> 00:10:26,196 ♪ Brands belong on cattle 164 00:10:26,276 --> 00:10:28,904 ♪ And that ain't what we're sellin' at Miss Mona's 165 00:10:29,112 --> 00:10:30,739 Do you catch my drift? 166 00:10:30,822 --> 00:10:34,042 ♪ I pay the food and the rent and the utilities 167 00:10:34,117 --> 00:10:37,587 ♪ You keep your mind on your work responsibilities 168 00:10:37,662 --> 00:10:41,292 ♪ Don't let your mouth overload your capabilities 169 00:10:41,374 --> 00:10:43,627 ♪ And we can get along 170 00:10:43,710 --> 00:10:44,882 Dawn? 171 00:10:44,961 --> 00:10:47,635 ♪ Any bad habits you come in with Get rid of right now 172 00:10:47,714 --> 00:10:48,715 Taddy Jo. 173 00:10:48,798 --> 00:10:51,347 ♪ I can't stand no chewin' gum It looks just like a cow 174 00:10:51,426 --> 00:10:52,427 Linda Lou. 175 00:10:52,510 --> 00:10:55,013 ♪ Anyone takin' sick leave oughta be real sure they're sick 176 00:10:55,096 --> 00:10:56,939 ♪ And every time you hear that bell 177 00:10:58,975 --> 00:11:00,648 ♪ You better get here double-quick 178 00:11:00,727 --> 00:11:03,401 ♪ And as for pimps. Pimps are somethin' you don't need 179 00:11:03,480 --> 00:11:05,653 ♪ To get your daily business done 180 00:11:05,732 --> 00:11:07,075 Are you listenin' good? 181 00:11:07,150 --> 00:11:08,823 ♪ Keep them leeches and bloodsuckers 182 00:11:08,902 --> 00:11:11,496 ♪ Off the back roads I know how to use a gun 183 00:11:11,571 --> 00:11:13,824 ♪ And nobody messes with my girls 184 00:11:14,282 --> 00:11:17,411 ♪ And any questions you might have about the way I run this place 185 00:11:17,494 --> 00:11:20,373 ♪ Don't gripe and whine behind my back 186 00:11:20,580 --> 00:11:22,753 ♪ Just tell me face-to-face I'm open-minded 187 00:11:22,832 --> 00:11:25,460 ♪ Say it all Then go upstairs and pack 188 00:11:25,668 --> 00:11:27,295 ♪ The door's that away 189 00:11:27,378 --> 00:11:30,598 ♪ She pays the food and the rent and the utilities 190 00:11:30,673 --> 00:11:34,098 ♪ We keep our mind on our work responsibilities 191 00:11:34,177 --> 00:11:37,522 ♪ Don't let your mouth overload your capabilities 192 00:11:38,014 --> 00:11:39,982 ♪ And we can get along 193 00:11:40,558 --> 00:11:42,231 Well, howdy, boys. 194 00:11:42,519 --> 00:11:45,272 It's good to see you. Nice to meet you. 195 00:11:45,355 --> 00:11:49,076 Come on over here. I'd like you to meet my girls. 196 00:11:49,442 --> 00:11:52,867 ♪ It's just a 197 00:11:52,946 --> 00:11:57,042 ♪ Little bitty pissant country place 198 00:11:57,742 --> 00:12:00,461 ♪ Nothin' much to see 199 00:12:00,995 --> 00:12:05,717 ♪ No drinkin' allowed We get a nice quiet crowd 200 00:12:05,875 --> 00:12:08,344 ♪ Plain as it can be 201 00:12:08,461 --> 00:12:13,433 ♪ It's just a piddly, squattin' old-time country place 202 00:12:13,883 --> 00:12:16,011 ♪ Nothin' too high-toned 203 00:12:16,386 --> 00:12:19,230 ♪ Just lots of goodwill and maybe one small thrill 204 00:12:19,347 --> 00:12:21,270 ♪ But there's nothin' dirty goin' on 205 00:12:21,349 --> 00:12:24,569 ♪ It's just a little bitty pissant country place 206 00:12:24,686 --> 00:12:26,484 ♪ Nothin' much to see 207 00:12:26,563 --> 00:12:29,316 ♪ No drinkin' allowed We get a nice quiet crowd 208 00:12:29,399 --> 00:12:30,992 ♪ Plain as it can be 209 00:12:31,067 --> 00:12:34,367 ♪ It's just a piddly, squattin' old-time country place 210 00:12:34,445 --> 00:12:36,163 ♪ Nothin' too high-toned 211 00:12:36,239 --> 00:12:38,287 ♪ Just lots of goodwill and maybe one small thrill 212 00:12:38,491 --> 00:12:40,619 ♪ Just lots of goodwill and maybe one small thrill 213 00:12:40,785 --> 00:12:42,958 ♪ Just lots of goodwill and maybe one small thrill 214 00:12:43,246 --> 00:12:45,214 ♪ But there's nothin' dirty goin' on 215 00:12:47,959 --> 00:12:49,552 ♪ Nothin' dirty goin' on 216 00:12:49,627 --> 00:12:50,628 ♪ Yeah 217 00:12:55,592 --> 00:12:58,937 Well, everything was goin' along fine, just like always, 218 00:12:59,470 --> 00:13:02,098 until that famous college football celebration. 219 00:13:02,974 --> 00:13:05,397 Some folks think that that's when the trouble started. 220 00:13:06,102 --> 00:13:08,196 You see, for years, the winning seniors 221 00:13:08,271 --> 00:13:11,650 of the Texas Aggies-Texas U football game at Thanksgiving, 222 00:13:12,275 --> 00:13:14,824 they were treated to a night out at the Chicken Ranch 223 00:13:15,195 --> 00:13:17,323 by their alumni association. 224 00:13:17,572 --> 00:13:19,870 But actually, the real trouble started 225 00:13:19,949 --> 00:13:21,576 brewin' about three days before. 226 00:13:29,334 --> 00:13:33,680 I can't tell you how thrilled we are with your contribution. 227 00:13:33,838 --> 00:13:35,636 Here's your receipt. Thank you, Rita. 228 00:13:36,049 --> 00:13:38,723 Those kids'll be so excited, and the mayor, too. 229 00:13:38,801 --> 00:13:41,850 Why, the town council will probably vote you another plaque. 230 00:13:41,930 --> 00:13:44,479 Lord, I hope not. I got a closet full of 'em now. 231 00:13:44,557 --> 00:13:48,357 Hello, Dulcie Mae. You know Miss Mona. 232 00:13:49,062 --> 00:13:52,157 Yes, of course! We've met. Mornin'. 233 00:13:52,232 --> 00:13:53,233 Good mornin'. 234 00:13:53,316 --> 00:13:54,568 Isn't this wonderful? 235 00:13:54,651 --> 00:13:56,653 Miss Mona has just capped the goal for 236 00:13:56,736 --> 00:13:58,784 the Little League fund campaign. 237 00:13:58,863 --> 00:14:01,207 How nice! 238 00:14:01,616 --> 00:14:05,416 Well, on behalf of my son and his teammates, I wanna thank you. 239 00:14:05,495 --> 00:14:07,247 You tell them I'll be well repaid when they 240 00:14:07,330 --> 00:14:09,003 take the championship next year. 241 00:14:09,082 --> 00:14:10,425 Goodbye, Rita. 242 00:14:10,500 --> 00:14:12,340 I'm sorry the sheriff wasn't here to thank you. 243 00:14:12,627 --> 00:14:15,130 He drove over to Meritsville. He'll be gone all afternoon. 244 00:14:15,421 --> 00:14:17,924 Well, you tell him I said hi. Bye. 245 00:14:18,466 --> 00:14:19,513 Bye. 246 00:14:19,717 --> 00:14:20,809 Bye. 247 00:14:31,187 --> 00:14:32,530 Hey, Miss Mona. 248 00:14:32,605 --> 00:14:34,278 How are you doin', Deputy Fred? 249 00:14:34,482 --> 00:14:35,574 It's nice to see you. 250 00:14:35,650 --> 00:14:38,028 It's good to see you. Keepin' an eye on my place at night? 251 00:14:38,486 --> 00:14:41,046 Sure are. The Sheriff's real particular about security out there. 252 00:14:41,239 --> 00:14:43,617 Well, one of these nights when you ain't on duty, you drop in out there. 253 00:14:43,700 --> 00:14:46,624 My girls would love to show you a little appreciation. 254 00:14:47,412 --> 00:14:49,835 Shoot, Miss Mona. You know I'm a married man! 255 00:14:49,956 --> 00:14:51,629 Fred, you mean to tell me you don't think 256 00:14:51,708 --> 00:14:53,210 the cows don't appreciate the time off 257 00:14:53,293 --> 00:14:54,893 when a bull goes over to another pasture? 258 00:14:55,211 --> 00:14:57,054 Miss Mona! 259 00:14:59,048 --> 00:15:02,552 See you later, Miss Mona. - Okay. Goodbye. 260 00:15:49,349 --> 00:15:50,601 Damn it! 261 00:15:50,767 --> 00:15:52,110 What's the matter? 262 00:15:52,185 --> 00:15:53,937 You're in bed already. So? 263 00:15:54,604 --> 00:15:56,356 So, I told you 100 times, 264 00:15:56,439 --> 00:15:58,441 watching you get undressed is the best part. 265 00:15:58,900 --> 00:16:00,402 The best part? 266 00:16:00,902 --> 00:16:03,405 Well, maybe not the best part, but in the top two. 267 00:16:05,823 --> 00:16:09,293 Now, would I wanna disappoint my little honey? 268 00:16:11,245 --> 00:16:14,875 I'm glad I was late. 269 00:16:14,957 --> 00:16:19,007 Me too! You just hold your horses. I got a surprise for you. 270 00:16:19,212 --> 00:16:20,509 I went by the post office this morning. 271 00:16:20,588 --> 00:16:24,138 I picked up a package. The very latest thing from Frederick's of Hollywood. 272 00:16:24,217 --> 00:16:25,309 Yeah? - Just a little something sexy 273 00:16:25,385 --> 00:16:27,058 I thought you might like. 274 00:16:27,136 --> 00:16:28,176 What do you think? Little? 275 00:16:28,388 --> 00:16:29,514 It don't look too little to me. 276 00:16:29,597 --> 00:16:30,974 Well, it certainly ain't a trainin' bra, 277 00:16:31,057 --> 00:16:32,775 but I do believe I can fill it out. 278 00:16:32,850 --> 00:16:34,193 I don't think you got any problem there. 279 00:16:34,268 --> 00:16:36,145 I'll be back with more. 280 00:16:36,813 --> 00:16:39,316 You know, Mona, 281 00:16:39,899 --> 00:16:41,651 I've known a lot of women in my life. 282 00:16:42,110 --> 00:16:44,829 None of 'em has ever been exciting to me like you are. 283 00:16:45,238 --> 00:16:48,492 Really? Even after all these years we've been meetin' like this? 284 00:16:48,991 --> 00:16:50,038 I'll tell you something. 285 00:16:53,496 --> 00:16:57,922 A year with you is like a minute of sheer happiness. 286 00:16:58,459 --> 00:17:02,339 Well, now, that is just about the sweetest thing anybody ever said to me. 287 00:17:03,256 --> 00:17:04,473 I know. 288 00:17:05,675 --> 00:17:07,302 You know, honey, 289 00:17:07,552 --> 00:17:10,897 you bring out the... The romantic in me. 290 00:17:20,356 --> 00:17:22,154 You did that real fast. 291 00:17:22,692 --> 00:17:24,114 Well, honey, I've had a lot of practice 292 00:17:24,193 --> 00:17:25,695 gettin' in and out of my clothes. 293 00:17:25,820 --> 00:17:27,914 How do you like the outfit? 294 00:17:29,031 --> 00:17:30,283 Hot damn. 295 00:17:30,825 --> 00:17:32,793 Makes me feel real sexy. 296 00:17:40,042 --> 00:17:41,715 Well, you don't look real sexy. 297 00:17:42,545 --> 00:17:43,922 What do you mean? I look like I always look. 298 00:17:44,172 --> 00:17:45,264 That's just it. 299 00:17:45,339 --> 00:17:46,761 It's them damn droopy boxer drawers. 300 00:17:46,841 --> 00:17:48,388 I just hate the looks of them things. 301 00:17:48,718 --> 00:17:50,436 I've worn boxer shorts for years! 302 00:17:50,511 --> 00:17:52,058 And they look like it. 303 00:17:52,138 --> 00:17:54,232 These are a brand-new pair. 304 00:17:54,348 --> 00:17:56,476 I don't know what you're talkin' about, "I don't look sexy." 305 00:17:56,559 --> 00:17:59,779 People tell me I have a real sexy quality about me. 306 00:17:59,896 --> 00:18:02,194 Well, you do, but them boxer shorts don't. 307 00:18:02,273 --> 00:18:06,073 But when I was gettin' me some sexy things, I thought about you, 308 00:18:06,152 --> 00:18:08,496 because they have a his 'n' hers sexy department at Frederick's 309 00:18:08,571 --> 00:18:10,744 and I thought you might try that on for size. 310 00:18:12,450 --> 00:18:14,168 What the hell is it, a Japanese slingshot? 311 00:18:15,495 --> 00:18:19,295 No, it's jockey shorts with little silver snaps on the side. 312 00:18:19,499 --> 00:18:23,595 Little is the key word here. They are real little. 313 00:18:23,669 --> 00:18:25,717 In fact, a guy could hurt himself wearin' those things. 314 00:18:25,796 --> 00:18:27,423 I don't think so, thank you very much. 315 00:18:27,715 --> 00:18:32,346 Ed Earl, I paid $20 for these, plus postage. And I want you to wear it. 316 00:18:33,054 --> 00:18:34,897 Aw, you paid $20 for these? 317 00:18:34,972 --> 00:18:36,064 Yes! 318 00:18:36,224 --> 00:18:37,441 Well, you got screwed. 319 00:18:38,601 --> 00:18:40,228 Come on, Ed Earl! 320 00:18:40,728 --> 00:18:41,775 No! 321 00:18:41,854 --> 00:18:43,982 If they look half as good on you as I think they're going to 322 00:18:44,065 --> 00:18:46,284 you ain't gonna have to wear 'em but a second. 323 00:18:46,526 --> 00:18:47,527 Maybe less. 324 00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:50,572 They're ridiculous. They're impossible. 325 00:18:50,655 --> 00:18:51,702 They're sexy. 326 00:18:51,781 --> 00:18:53,328 No, no, no! 327 00:18:53,783 --> 00:18:56,457 Well, fine! Then I'm gettin' dressed and goin' home. 328 00:18:56,619 --> 00:19:00,465 Well, fine! I'm goin' in the bathroom and... Put these on. 329 00:19:05,169 --> 00:19:07,843 Be like puttin' two bowling balls in a marble bag. 330 00:19:08,798 --> 00:19:11,051 Braggin', braggin', braggin'. 331 00:19:14,804 --> 00:19:17,808 Well, I saw Dulcie Mae in town today. 332 00:19:17,932 --> 00:19:19,058 Yeah? 333 00:19:19,141 --> 00:19:21,815 I guess you'll be goin' over there for Thanksgivin' dinner. 334 00:19:21,936 --> 00:19:23,358 Don't I always? 335 00:19:24,021 --> 00:19:25,989 You know, you better check that turkey of hers, 336 00:19:26,065 --> 00:19:27,658 because there's a hook in there that's gonna 337 00:19:27,733 --> 00:19:29,485 drag your ass to a wedding chapel. 338 00:19:30,486 --> 00:19:32,580 No way. 339 00:19:36,075 --> 00:19:39,500 I don't believe in matrimony. It screws up a relationship. 340 00:19:39,579 --> 00:19:41,456 Amen to that, Ed Earl. 341 00:19:42,999 --> 00:19:44,000 Ready? 342 00:19:44,500 --> 00:19:46,343 I'm always ready. 343 00:19:52,008 --> 00:19:54,511 Well, hellfire. Is that it? 344 00:19:54,677 --> 00:19:55,803 How'd you like it? 345 00:19:55,928 --> 00:19:57,680 I didn't hardly get to even see them! 346 00:19:59,223 --> 00:20:00,270 That's all you're gonna see, 347 00:20:00,349 --> 00:20:02,101 'cause I ain't gonna parade around like no model. 348 00:20:02,268 --> 00:20:04,487 Come on, Ed Earl. For me. 349 00:20:04,562 --> 00:20:05,859 No! No. 350 00:20:05,980 --> 00:20:08,324 Come on. One itsy-bitsy peek? 351 00:20:08,399 --> 00:20:09,946 What are you doin'? Man! 352 00:20:10,026 --> 00:20:14,873 Now, that's what the little silver snaps are for. 353 00:20:14,989 --> 00:20:17,117 Work, don't they? 354 00:20:17,783 --> 00:20:19,410 Just like a snap. 355 00:20:20,661 --> 00:20:22,914 Come on over here and give me a little lip-lock. 356 00:20:25,291 --> 00:20:26,331 Gotta brush my teeth. 357 00:20:28,294 --> 00:20:29,921 You know how I am about my breath. 358 00:20:36,344 --> 00:20:38,597 Ed Earl, I like a lot of things, 359 00:20:38,679 --> 00:20:40,977 but these afternoons with you have got to top the list. 360 00:20:41,349 --> 00:20:43,602 Yeah? Well, sing it to me, honey. 361 00:20:45,895 --> 00:20:48,114 ♪ I like fancy, frilly things 362 00:20:48,356 --> 00:20:50,609 ♪ High-heel shoes and diamond rings 363 00:20:50,775 --> 00:20:53,153 ♪ Ragtime bands and Western swing 364 00:20:53,235 --> 00:20:55,658 ♪ And sneakin' around with you 365 00:20:55,738 --> 00:20:57,957 ♪ I like beer and rodeos 366 00:20:58,032 --> 00:21:00,285 ♪ Detective books and dominoes 367 00:21:00,368 --> 00:21:01,745 ♪ Football games and Cheerios 368 00:21:01,827 --> 00:21:03,170 ♪ Cheerios? 369 00:21:03,245 --> 00:21:04,622 ♪ And sneakin' around with you 370 00:21:04,705 --> 00:21:07,049 ♪ Sneakin' around with you 371 00:21:07,124 --> 00:21:11,971 ♪ Goin' a round or two Doin' what lovers do 372 00:21:12,505 --> 00:21:14,599 ♪ Whenever they're sneakin' around 373 00:21:15,049 --> 00:21:17,347 ♪ I like lots of cash on hand 374 00:21:17,426 --> 00:21:19,645 ♪ And dirty jokes about the Fuller Brush man 375 00:21:19,720 --> 00:21:21,768 ♪ I like stuff I understand 376 00:21:21,847 --> 00:21:23,599 ♪ Like sneakin' around with you 377 00:21:24,100 --> 00:21:26,694 ♪ You know, I like a thrill that has no strings 378 00:21:26,769 --> 00:21:28,817 ♪ Friendship that don't ever change 379 00:21:28,896 --> 00:21:31,069 ♪ And laughter from the joy of things 380 00:21:31,148 --> 00:21:33,025 ♪ And sneakin' around with you 381 00:21:33,109 --> 00:21:35,407 ♪ Sneakin' around with you 382 00:21:35,611 --> 00:21:37,989 ♪ Goin' a round or two 383 00:21:38,072 --> 00:21:40,450 ♪ Doin' what lovers do 384 00:21:40,950 --> 00:21:42,748 ♪ Whenever they're sneakin' around 385 00:21:53,003 --> 00:21:56,507 ♪ I like drive-in picture shows 386 00:21:56,632 --> 00:21:58,930 ♪ Kissin' long and lovin' slow 387 00:21:59,009 --> 00:22:01,228 ♪ Secret places lovers go 388 00:22:01,303 --> 00:22:02,805 ♪ Whenever they're sneakin' around 389 00:22:02,888 --> 00:22:05,562 ♪ I like the crazy things we try 390 00:22:05,641 --> 00:22:08,064 ♪ And the sexy things we fantasize 391 00:22:08,144 --> 00:22:10,613 ♪ Just a-makin' out in the broad daylight 392 00:22:10,688 --> 00:22:12,315 ♪ And sneakin' around with you 393 00:22:12,398 --> 00:22:14,696 ♪ Sneakin' around with you 394 00:22:14,775 --> 00:22:17,119 ♪ Keepin' it all brand new 395 00:22:17,194 --> 00:22:19,617 ♪ Gettin' the best of you 396 00:22:20,197 --> 00:22:22,040 ♪ Whenever we're sneakin around 397 00:22:22,116 --> 00:22:24,289 ♪ Sneakin' around That's all 398 00:22:24,368 --> 00:22:26,746 ♪ I'm gonna lay down the law 399 00:22:26,829 --> 00:22:29,127 ♪ Watchin' the rise and fall 400 00:22:29,206 --> 00:22:31,550 ♪ Of lovers sneakin' around 401 00:22:32,168 --> 00:22:34,637 ♪ We're just sneakin' around 402 00:22:34,754 --> 00:22:36,097 ♪ We're just 403 00:22:36,172 --> 00:22:38,266 ♪ Sneakin' 404 00:22:41,552 --> 00:22:42,804 Sheriff? 405 00:22:42,887 --> 00:22:44,309 Sheriff! 406 00:22:48,517 --> 00:22:50,019 It's Deputy... - Fred. 407 00:22:54,648 --> 00:22:59,529 Hold that position? 408 00:22:59,612 --> 00:23:02,456 Don't move. Be right back. 409 00:23:13,876 --> 00:23:15,549 This better be important. 410 00:23:15,628 --> 00:23:16,720 Well, I think it is. 411 00:23:16,796 --> 00:23:18,298 I saw your car parked from the highway 412 00:23:18,380 --> 00:23:19,802 and I figured your phone was out, because... 413 00:23:19,882 --> 00:23:21,259 What are you wearin' that for? 414 00:23:21,967 --> 00:23:23,435 Takin' a shower. 415 00:23:23,511 --> 00:23:24,511 Really? 416 00:23:24,553 --> 00:23:25,725 I always take my shower in the mornin'. 417 00:23:25,805 --> 00:23:27,603 I read in the Reader's Digest... 418 00:23:27,681 --> 00:23:29,228 I don't care! 419 00:23:30,059 --> 00:23:31,185 What do you want? 420 00:23:31,268 --> 00:23:33,145 It's the mayor. He wants to speak to you. 421 00:23:33,229 --> 00:23:35,231 Rita's been callin' all over the county for you. 422 00:23:35,481 --> 00:23:36,903 He wants a meeting right away. 423 00:23:36,982 --> 00:23:38,029 Can't it wait? 424 00:23:38,359 --> 00:23:39,827 You mean till after your shower? 425 00:23:40,236 --> 00:23:42,284 You go to your radio. 426 00:23:42,613 --> 00:23:44,240 Tell him I'll be there when I get there. 427 00:23:44,865 --> 00:23:47,243 Nothing can be that important that it can't wait till this afternoon. 428 00:23:47,576 --> 00:23:48,577 Right, Sheriff. 429 00:23:49,662 --> 00:23:51,414 Nice man, but dumb. 430 00:23:58,921 --> 00:24:01,925 Mona? 431 00:24:02,591 --> 00:24:03,717 Mona? 432 00:24:41,255 --> 00:24:42,855 Ain't that funny? All this time Miss Mona 433 00:24:42,923 --> 00:24:44,925 was at the back knockin' on the screen door. 434 00:24:45,009 --> 00:24:47,849 She said she's in a real big hurry but just dropped by to give you this. 435 00:24:52,099 --> 00:24:53,726 It's a Japanese slingshot. 436 00:24:56,979 --> 00:24:59,698 Well, look at that! At last! 437 00:24:59,773 --> 00:25:01,992 Okay, Rufus. What's on your mind? 438 00:25:02,067 --> 00:25:03,239 Something that could have serious 439 00:25:03,319 --> 00:25:04,912 implications to the health of this town! 440 00:25:04,987 --> 00:25:06,705 Tell him, C.J.! Just like you told me. 441 00:25:06,780 --> 00:25:09,140 Well, Sheriff, I have this friend that works in a TV station 442 00:25:09,199 --> 00:25:10,246 down in Houston. 443 00:25:10,326 --> 00:25:12,579 He tipped me off that Melvin P. Thorpe's 444 00:25:12,661 --> 00:25:15,084 plannin' an expose on the Chicken Ranch. 445 00:25:15,497 --> 00:25:16,589 Who? 446 00:25:16,665 --> 00:25:18,008 Melvin P. Thorpe! 447 00:25:18,083 --> 00:25:19,630 He's that crazy consumer advocate. 448 00:25:19,710 --> 00:25:21,883 Has a report on the late night news. 449 00:25:22,254 --> 00:25:24,757 He's got a new show now, a half hour once a week, 450 00:25:24,840 --> 00:25:27,138 The Watchdog Report. It's on tonight. 451 00:25:27,259 --> 00:25:30,559 The Chicken Ranch on TV. Now, come on, fellas. 452 00:25:31,847 --> 00:25:33,224 Television is a family medium. 453 00:25:33,307 --> 00:25:34,934 But he's a sensationalist, Ed Earl. 454 00:25:35,017 --> 00:25:38,191 He shows up with his TV cameras every time a consumer has a complaint. 455 00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:40,113 He's a menace to the business community. 456 00:25:40,439 --> 00:25:43,158 He's that feller that put the peanuts back in the chocolate bar. 457 00:25:44,818 --> 00:25:45,910 What? 458 00:25:45,986 --> 00:25:47,988 He made the makers of the Peanut Delight candy bar 459 00:25:48,072 --> 00:25:50,291 admit that they put less peanuts 460 00:25:50,366 --> 00:25:51,993 in each bar than they advertised. 461 00:25:52,076 --> 00:25:53,316 He made them change their ways. 462 00:25:54,161 --> 00:25:55,321 Sounds like a tough customer. 463 00:25:55,788 --> 00:25:57,268 He's got a lot of influence out there. 464 00:25:57,665 --> 00:25:59,545 If he brings cameras out to the Chicken Ranch... 465 00:25:59,625 --> 00:26:02,970 Come on, Rufus! I'll make some phone calls. 466 00:26:04,171 --> 00:26:06,799 I got a little influence around this state myself. 467 00:26:10,386 --> 00:26:12,935 Well, it's no use talkin' to me about it, Sheriff! 468 00:26:13,263 --> 00:26:16,312 Melvin P. Thorpe is now the biggest attraction at this station. 469 00:26:16,850 --> 00:26:21,071 High ratings. Lots of letters. He doesn't listen to anybody. 470 00:26:21,563 --> 00:26:23,486 Hell, he wants to go national! 471 00:26:23,565 --> 00:26:25,943 Wants to be watchdog for the whole U.S. of A. 472 00:26:26,235 --> 00:26:27,703 Love to help you, Ed Earl, 473 00:26:27,778 --> 00:26:30,138 but just like you don't want to mess with the Chicken Ranch, 474 00:26:30,197 --> 00:26:32,199 I don't wanna ruffle this old bird's feathers. 475 00:26:32,825 --> 00:26:35,874 Here in Houston, he's becomin' a regular Texas attraction. 476 00:26:36,245 --> 00:26:38,168 Well, now, wait a minute, Ed Earl. 477 00:26:38,247 --> 00:26:42,218 I'd tread easy on this one. Them TV boys can be mighty powerful. 478 00:26:42,376 --> 00:26:44,549 And mighty useful, if you get my meaning. 479 00:26:45,004 --> 00:26:46,005 Senator, roll call. 480 00:26:47,089 --> 00:26:48,682 Excuse me, Ed Earl. I gotta go. 481 00:26:48,757 --> 00:26:51,135 It's that damn bilingual bullshit again. 482 00:26:51,260 --> 00:26:53,012 Let me give you a word of advice from 483 00:26:53,137 --> 00:26:55,310 one elected official to another. 484 00:26:56,098 --> 00:26:58,066 Be careful of the box*. * TV. 485 00:27:02,021 --> 00:27:04,115 Son of a bitch. What the hell's going on? 486 00:27:04,189 --> 00:27:06,942 This goddam Melvin P. Thorpe's got the whole state bamboozled. 487 00:27:07,026 --> 00:27:09,279 This is serious, Ed Earl. You gotta do something. 488 00:27:09,945 --> 00:27:11,367 I intend to. 489 00:27:12,322 --> 00:27:15,371 Deputy Fred. I want you to hold down the fort for a while. 490 00:27:15,617 --> 00:27:16,869 Me? Yeah, you. 491 00:27:16,952 --> 00:27:18,374 Where you goin'? 492 00:27:18,454 --> 00:27:19,626 I'm goin' to Houston. I'm gonna take care 493 00:27:19,705 --> 00:27:21,207 of that little peckerwood* myself. * White trash. 494 00:27:42,311 --> 00:27:44,313 This is it. Thank you. 495 00:27:45,898 --> 00:27:47,696 Come in. 496 00:27:51,070 --> 00:27:52,447 Mr Thorpe? 497 00:27:52,821 --> 00:27:53,868 I know you. 498 00:27:54,448 --> 00:27:55,495 You do? 499 00:27:55,824 --> 00:27:59,454 Sheriff Ed Earl Dodd. They told me you were here. Come on in. 500 00:28:00,871 --> 00:28:02,498 I hope I'm not... 501 00:28:03,665 --> 00:28:04,917 Interrupting anything. 502 00:28:05,167 --> 00:28:07,044 Please! It's my pleasure, my honor. 503 00:28:07,127 --> 00:28:08,629 What brings you here to Houston? 504 00:28:08,712 --> 00:28:10,305 Sit down. Anywhere over here. 505 00:28:10,380 --> 00:28:12,803 I'm gettin' dressed. 506 00:28:12,925 --> 00:28:15,678 Sit down. I've got my TV show to do, 507 00:28:15,803 --> 00:28:17,350 and I'm runnin' a bit behind time. 508 00:28:17,846 --> 00:28:19,848 It's your show I want to talk to you about, Mr Thorpe. 509 00:28:19,932 --> 00:28:22,392 Melvin. 510 00:28:22,684 --> 00:28:24,436 Please. You watch the show, Ed? 511 00:28:24,520 --> 00:28:25,692 Well... - Last week 512 00:28:26,230 --> 00:28:28,574 was the best ratin' we ever had. 513 00:28:28,732 --> 00:28:31,906 The city planning commissioner was drivin' a city car... 514 00:28:31,985 --> 00:28:33,487 Just hold that for me, will you? 515 00:28:34,863 --> 00:28:37,742 While he was on vacation. Caught him dead to rights. 516 00:28:38,158 --> 00:28:40,081 That pitiful putz. Would you just pull that up? 517 00:28:40,160 --> 00:28:42,128 What? - Just pull that up. 518 00:28:43,747 --> 00:28:45,795 And we broke a 30 share. 519 00:28:45,874 --> 00:28:47,876 It's affectin' my pieces on the late night news. 520 00:28:48,335 --> 00:28:51,259 Up, up, up. They just love my little report. 521 00:28:53,715 --> 00:28:54,932 I hear you're very popular. 522 00:28:55,259 --> 00:29:00,766 The power of television, of public exposure, is so great it scares me. 523 00:29:01,014 --> 00:29:03,517 I swear, I could get the mayor's own children 524 00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:04,601 to throw rocks at him. 525 00:29:05,727 --> 00:29:07,400 Which show did you like best, Ed? 526 00:29:09,148 --> 00:29:11,276 I think the one about the... 527 00:29:11,483 --> 00:29:12,523 Nuts in the chocolate bar. 528 00:29:12,568 --> 00:29:14,662 That's one of my favorites. 529 00:29:15,028 --> 00:29:18,202 "Threescore" means 60, like the Bible says. 530 00:29:18,282 --> 00:29:21,377 So, if it says "60 nuts" on the wrapper, 531 00:29:21,451 --> 00:29:24,500 I wanna see 60 nuts inside. 532 00:29:24,580 --> 00:29:27,379 And I'm talkin' full nuts. I'm not talkin' a half nut, 533 00:29:27,749 --> 00:29:29,751 or nut bits or nut chips. 534 00:29:31,628 --> 00:29:32,971 I'm talkin' a full nut. 535 00:29:37,259 --> 00:29:38,806 I can see that. 536 00:29:39,261 --> 00:29:43,516 Thank God we still live in a society where anything 537 00:29:43,849 --> 00:29:46,693 that's phony or dishonest can't stand the light of day. 538 00:29:47,477 --> 00:29:49,445 Sock. Beg your pardon? 539 00:29:49,521 --> 00:29:50,818 Sock. 540 00:29:51,398 --> 00:29:52,991 Thank you. Yeah. 541 00:29:54,526 --> 00:29:57,905 Most corporations involved in false advertisin' 542 00:29:58,530 --> 00:30:00,624 would just laugh at a $50 fine. 543 00:30:01,283 --> 00:30:03,331 But you show up with your TV camera 544 00:30:03,660 --> 00:30:05,708 and give them a little bad publicity 545 00:30:05,996 --> 00:30:09,967 and they shape up faster than goose shit slides through a tin horn. 546 00:30:14,922 --> 00:30:17,926 Well, Melvin, it's that bad publicity I want to talk to you about. 547 00:30:18,175 --> 00:30:20,428 That could hurt people. You take that report 548 00:30:20,510 --> 00:30:22,057 you're doin' on the Chicken Ranch. 549 00:30:22,930 --> 00:30:24,682 That place is older than rocks and water. 550 00:30:25,307 --> 00:30:28,060 I wouldn't be surprised if your granddaddy took your daddy out there 551 00:30:28,143 --> 00:30:29,690 to learn about the birds and the bees. 552 00:30:29,770 --> 00:30:33,525 I'm from New Jersey. 553 00:30:33,982 --> 00:30:37,486 See, I moved to Houston six years ago. 554 00:30:37,694 --> 00:30:39,492 Texas suits my style. 555 00:30:41,031 --> 00:30:42,749 The point I'm tryin' to make is 556 00:30:42,824 --> 00:30:45,168 that every schoolboy in the state knows about it. 557 00:30:45,911 --> 00:30:47,754 Most of the politicians have slept there. 558 00:30:47,829 --> 00:30:49,957 And the mayor and the people of my county that voted for me, 559 00:30:50,040 --> 00:30:51,667 they want to keep things just the way they are. 560 00:30:51,833 --> 00:30:55,679 You know something, Sheriff, it just struck me. 561 00:30:56,088 --> 00:30:58,182 We are in the same profession. 562 00:30:58,257 --> 00:30:59,304 What's that? 563 00:30:59,383 --> 00:31:00,760 Law enforcement. 564 00:31:00,842 --> 00:31:03,686 I'm out there fightin' for the rights of the public, just like you. 565 00:31:03,762 --> 00:31:06,390 Both of us are interested in protectin' the public. 566 00:31:06,682 --> 00:31:10,152 You in the old way, and me in the new. 567 00:31:10,811 --> 00:31:11,903 The new? 568 00:31:11,979 --> 00:31:13,697 Television. 569 00:31:14,106 --> 00:31:16,404 I'm the electronic bounty hunter. 570 00:31:16,483 --> 00:31:18,702 I use a camera, you use a gun. 571 00:31:18,944 --> 00:31:20,196 Yeah. 572 00:31:20,404 --> 00:31:21,747 Well, Melvin, everybody'd be happy 573 00:31:21,822 --> 00:31:23,119 if you'd just drop the whole thing. 574 00:31:24,700 --> 00:31:27,123 I mean, those ladies out there, 575 00:31:27,536 --> 00:31:29,504 they perform a necessary function. 576 00:31:29,579 --> 00:31:30,626 I mean, right or wrong... 577 00:31:30,706 --> 00:31:32,208 Right or wrong don't interest me! 578 00:31:32,833 --> 00:31:36,212 I'm no moralizer. I leave all that to the preacher. 579 00:31:36,670 --> 00:31:38,217 Well, I'm glad. 580 00:31:38,839 --> 00:31:40,341 Anyway, the mayor was thinkin' maybe 581 00:31:40,424 --> 00:31:41,767 you'd want a little unnecessary publicity. 582 00:31:41,842 --> 00:31:45,813 Unnecessary publicity? He's got me all wrong! 583 00:31:45,887 --> 00:31:49,517 I'm not one of those sensation mongers out to boost his own ego! 584 00:31:49,641 --> 00:31:50,642 Clear. 585 00:31:52,144 --> 00:31:53,487 How do you like it? 586 00:31:53,562 --> 00:31:54,688 It's different. 587 00:31:55,063 --> 00:31:57,486 I designed this myself. 588 00:31:57,607 --> 00:32:02,238 No, you tell your mayor he's got nothing to fear from me on that score. 589 00:32:03,071 --> 00:32:04,323 He'll be happy to hear that. 590 00:32:04,406 --> 00:32:06,124 I'm a lawman. That's my interest. 591 00:32:06,199 --> 00:32:08,327 The law, right, partner? 592 00:32:08,410 --> 00:32:10,037 20 seconds, Mr. Thorpe. 593 00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:13,374 I'm on! Friend Ed, I gotta go. 594 00:32:14,416 --> 00:32:15,713 That's my cue. 595 00:32:16,251 --> 00:32:18,504 Come on! 596 00:32:19,588 --> 00:32:20,931 Apres vous! 597 00:32:21,673 --> 00:32:24,222 Come to think of it, I'd love to do an interview with you. 598 00:32:24,384 --> 00:32:25,510 I don't think I'm the type. 599 00:32:25,594 --> 00:32:27,847 Nonsense! You're exactly what the public would like to see. 600 00:32:27,929 --> 00:32:29,897 Really? We'll discuss it after the show. 601 00:32:29,973 --> 00:32:31,850 I want you to be my guest. 602 00:32:31,933 --> 00:32:33,480 This is the sponsor's booth. 603 00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:35,028 Just go in there, make yourself comfortable. 604 00:32:35,103 --> 00:32:37,197 Make yourself to home. See you later, partner. 605 00:32:37,272 --> 00:32:38,364 Thank you. 606 00:32:38,774 --> 00:32:40,492 ♪ He's out on the prowl 607 00:32:41,109 --> 00:32:44,113 ♪ Guards and checks the best he can 608 00:32:44,696 --> 00:32:48,667 ♪ Watchdog is a fighting man 609 00:32:49,368 --> 00:32:54,169 ♪ Watchdog will throw his beam of light around 610 00:32:54,664 --> 00:32:58,419 ♪ If some folks don't toe the line 611 00:32:58,960 --> 00:33:01,088 ♪ Watchdog's light will shine 612 00:33:01,171 --> 00:33:03,048 ♪ Shine, shine, shine 613 00:33:03,131 --> 00:33:05,884 And now, the Watchdog man himself. 614 00:33:05,967 --> 00:33:10,017 The eyes and ears of Texas, Melvin P. Thorpe! 615 00:33:15,143 --> 00:33:18,989 Thank you, fellow Texans, and welcome to The Watchdog Report, 616 00:33:19,106 --> 00:33:21,985 with yours truly, Melvin P. Thorpe, 617 00:33:22,401 --> 00:33:24,278 keepin' an eye on what's goin' on 618 00:33:24,361 --> 00:33:26,284 in this beautiful state of ours. 619 00:33:26,655 --> 00:33:30,205 This week's spotlight will shine on a shameful situation 620 00:33:30,283 --> 00:33:34,163 that has been allowed to exist for close to a 100 years. 621 00:33:34,538 --> 00:33:37,417 I'm talkin' about the Chicken Ranch, my friends. 622 00:33:38,083 --> 00:33:40,757 The proprietor of this innocent-lookin' ranch house 623 00:33:40,836 --> 00:33:44,010 is a woman known only as Miss Mona. 624 00:33:44,172 --> 00:33:49,144 And the man who turns his back on her illegal operation 625 00:33:49,219 --> 00:33:52,189 is Sheriff Ed Earl Dodd! 626 00:33:52,389 --> 00:33:55,438 Did I say illegal? Yes, I did! 627 00:33:56,643 --> 00:33:58,941 Now, I know that this is TV, 628 00:33:59,396 --> 00:34:02,525 so I'm gonna try to be as delicate as I can! 629 00:34:02,983 --> 00:34:06,408 Here goes, and may God forgive me! 630 00:34:07,404 --> 00:34:09,577 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it 631 00:34:09,656 --> 00:34:11,704 ♪ Lord, have mercy on our souls 632 00:34:11,783 --> 00:34:13,785 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it 633 00:34:13,869 --> 00:34:16,088 ♪ Lord, have mercy on our souls 634 00:34:16,163 --> 00:34:20,009 ♪ I'll expose the facts Although it fills me with disgust 635 00:34:20,459 --> 00:34:23,463 ♪ Please excuse the filthy, dark details 636 00:34:23,545 --> 00:34:25,172 ♪ And carnal lust 637 00:34:25,505 --> 00:34:28,224 ♪ Filthy, dark details and carnal lust 638 00:34:28,884 --> 00:34:31,137 ♪ Dancin' goin' on inside it 639 00:34:31,219 --> 00:34:32,971 ♪ Don't you see they've gone plumb wild 640 00:34:33,180 --> 00:34:34,898 ♪ I inquired No one denied it 641 00:34:34,973 --> 00:34:37,317 ♪ Now I think I'm gettin' riled 642 00:34:37,392 --> 00:34:38,814 ♪ Bodies close together 643 00:34:38,894 --> 00:34:41,443 ♪ Arms and legs all rearranged 644 00:34:41,563 --> 00:34:44,908 ♪ And the Sheriff does not close it down 645 00:34:44,983 --> 00:34:46,485 ♪ That's very strange 646 00:34:46,568 --> 00:34:49,913 ♪ Does not close it down That's very strange 647 00:34:50,071 --> 00:34:52,620 ♪ Mean-eyed, juiced-up brilliantined honky-tonk cowboys 648 00:34:52,699 --> 00:34:53,825 ♪ No 649 00:34:53,909 --> 00:34:56,958 ♪ Mixin' with green-eyed, thin-lipped hard-as-nails peroxide blondes 650 00:34:57,037 --> 00:34:58,129 ♪ No 651 00:34:58,205 --> 00:35:02,506 ♪ Not to mention some types that you'd never guess would venture near 652 00:35:02,584 --> 00:35:07,511 ♪ Actin' all depraved and loose and wild 90 miles from here 653 00:35:07,756 --> 00:35:11,056 And now, our own Melvin P. Thorpe Singers. 654 00:35:11,134 --> 00:35:12,602 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it 655 00:35:12,677 --> 00:35:15,271 My goodness, he's talkin' about us! 656 00:35:15,388 --> 00:35:17,015 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it 657 00:35:17,098 --> 00:35:18,098 Suits me, Morn. 658 00:35:18,141 --> 00:35:19,188 ♪ I'll crusade 659 00:35:19,309 --> 00:35:22,609 Doreen! Get my heart pills! 660 00:35:23,772 --> 00:35:25,945 ♪ Loveless copulation goin' on 661 00:35:26,024 --> 00:35:27,025 Hot damn! 662 00:35:27,275 --> 00:35:28,993 ♪ And it must stop 663 00:35:29,110 --> 00:35:32,410 ♪ Loveless copulation Loveless copulation 664 00:35:32,489 --> 00:35:33,536 Loveless copulation? 665 00:35:34,199 --> 00:35:38,249 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it God, have mercy on our souls 666 00:35:38,370 --> 00:35:41,419 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it God, have mercy 667 00:35:44,376 --> 00:35:45,468 Can you dig it? 668 00:35:47,629 --> 00:35:49,757 ♪ Loveless copulation going on 669 00:35:56,972 --> 00:35:59,771 Don't touch that dial! This is Melvin P. Thorpe 670 00:35:59,849 --> 00:36:02,898 sayin' I'll be back with new and revealin' information 671 00:36:02,978 --> 00:36:05,072 about this and other cases. 672 00:36:05,146 --> 00:36:07,695 Watchdog never sleeps! 673 00:36:09,442 --> 00:36:12,992 ♪ And it must stop Watchdog's gonna get you 674 00:36:13,238 --> 00:36:14,911 ♪ Gonna shine his light on you 675 00:36:14,990 --> 00:36:16,867 ♪ Watchdog's gonna get you 676 00:36:16,950 --> 00:36:18,452 ♪ Gonna shine his light on you 677 00:36:26,293 --> 00:36:29,797 Damn. That man is crazier than a peach orchard sow. 678 00:36:30,505 --> 00:36:32,724 Announcin' it straight out on TV. 679 00:36:32,799 --> 00:36:34,346 So you been sayin'. 680 00:36:34,426 --> 00:36:35,894 Everybody's talkin' about it. 681 00:36:35,969 --> 00:36:38,722 Not that it's big news to anybody over three months of age. 682 00:36:39,514 --> 00:36:41,107 But they heard it in their livin' room. 683 00:36:41,182 --> 00:36:43,025 Sung. Sung to music. 684 00:36:43,852 --> 00:36:45,820 And he actually called my name on television. 685 00:36:46,813 --> 00:36:48,986 Worse than that. The son of a bitch called mine! 686 00:36:50,525 --> 00:36:52,869 You know, Ed Earl, seems like ever since I can remember, 687 00:36:52,944 --> 00:36:54,321 folks been jumpin' on me 688 00:36:54,404 --> 00:36:55,496 for one reason or another. 689 00:36:57,115 --> 00:36:59,396 But we're gonna beat this thing. I ain't worried about it. 690 00:36:59,868 --> 00:37:02,212 You know why? Because I trust you. 691 00:37:02,287 --> 00:37:04,289 'Cause you're my protector. 692 00:37:09,544 --> 00:37:11,546 Do you know he wears a sock in his underwear? 693 00:37:12,213 --> 00:37:13,590 A sock? Yeah. 694 00:37:14,132 --> 00:37:16,305 All rolled up like a Jimmy Dean sausage. 695 00:37:18,303 --> 00:37:19,896 Well, I bet he's runnin' for office. 696 00:37:19,971 --> 00:37:22,224 That's typical of them crusadin' fanatics. 697 00:37:22,557 --> 00:37:23,900 They flare up every few months. 698 00:37:23,975 --> 00:37:26,478 They're always confusin' crime with sin. 699 00:37:26,561 --> 00:37:28,063 People just get sick of hearin' it 700 00:37:28,146 --> 00:37:31,320 and pretty soon it just clears out of the air. 701 00:37:32,651 --> 00:37:33,903 You're probably right. 702 00:37:34,069 --> 00:37:35,321 Well, ain't I always? 703 00:37:37,238 --> 00:37:39,286 What? You know what I was thinkin', Ed Earl? 704 00:37:39,366 --> 00:37:41,118 Just how much I miss all the little stuff 705 00:37:41,201 --> 00:37:43,670 me and you used to do, like goin' up to the lake. 706 00:37:44,287 --> 00:37:46,710 Wouldn't it be fun just to go up there, get a couple of six-packs 707 00:37:46,790 --> 00:37:49,009 and just get drunker than Cootie Brown? 708 00:37:49,084 --> 00:37:52,258 Girl, that's the best idea you had all year. When we gonna do this? 709 00:37:52,921 --> 00:37:54,201 Well, I'd like to do it tonight. 710 00:37:55,256 --> 00:37:56,599 So would I. 711 00:38:00,512 --> 00:38:02,606 Well, I wonder who that is. 712 00:38:08,520 --> 00:38:10,238 Hey, Deputy Fred. Morning, girls! 713 00:38:10,313 --> 00:38:11,553 How's your tallywacker hangin'? 714 00:38:11,606 --> 00:38:13,734 Fine... 715 00:38:13,817 --> 00:38:15,034 Shoot. 716 00:38:19,030 --> 00:38:20,873 Hi, Sheriff. - This better be important. 717 00:38:20,949 --> 00:38:22,872 I think it is. That Melvin P. Thorpe 718 00:38:22,951 --> 00:38:24,168 is settin' up his television show 719 00:38:24,244 --> 00:38:25,871 right out in front of the courthouse! 720 00:38:25,954 --> 00:38:27,154 In front of the... - Courthouse! 721 00:38:27,330 --> 00:38:29,583 He's gettin' some pictures for a piece on the late news tonight. 722 00:38:29,666 --> 00:38:33,546 He's got a whole posse of TV cameramen, reporters. I think you better come take a look. 723 00:38:33,628 --> 00:38:35,175 Right out in front of... - Your office! 724 00:38:35,255 --> 00:38:36,347 Son of a... - Bitch. 725 00:38:39,968 --> 00:38:42,187 I cannot believe that sucker! 726 00:38:42,262 --> 00:38:44,230 You know, he even brought his own singers. 727 00:38:44,305 --> 00:38:45,932 Wait'll I get my hands... 728 00:38:48,101 --> 00:38:49,398 Go get him, Sheriff! 729 00:38:49,477 --> 00:38:50,649 Come on, Deputy Fred! 730 00:38:52,647 --> 00:38:56,493 Ed Earl, please don't go doin' something stupid you're gonna be sorry for! 731 00:38:57,652 --> 00:38:58,699 Watch your temper. 732 00:38:58,778 --> 00:39:00,405 Everything's gonna be fine, Mona. 733 00:39:00,488 --> 00:39:01,865 Leave that little shithead to me. 734 00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:24,680 Howdy again, good neighbors. Melvin P. Thorpe, the old Watchdog himself, 735 00:39:24,929 --> 00:39:26,852 shinin' a spotlight on Gilbert, 736 00:39:26,931 --> 00:39:29,150 the little town with the big shame. 737 00:39:30,185 --> 00:39:31,937 Who's that fella in them trick britches? 738 00:39:32,562 --> 00:39:34,882 I don't know, but it's too late in the year for a carnival. 739 00:39:35,565 --> 00:39:37,567 One of them TV folks, looks like to me. 740 00:39:37,901 --> 00:39:40,404 We're here at the Lanville County Courthouse 741 00:39:40,487 --> 00:39:42,114 to ask some of the local citizens 742 00:39:42,322 --> 00:39:44,791 how they feel about the infamous bordello 743 00:39:44,866 --> 00:39:48,496 runnin' wide open in their American home town. 744 00:39:49,120 --> 00:39:51,464 Cut! All right, now, stay with me, boys. 745 00:39:51,539 --> 00:39:55,794 And when I start the music, I want you Dogettes to start with me, brisk! 746 00:39:56,544 --> 00:40:00,048 Good people of Gilbert, may I have your attention, please? 747 00:40:00,423 --> 00:40:03,802 I would like to speak to you about a matter of great importance and concern. 748 00:40:03,885 --> 00:40:05,762 Let's hear it, Melvin! Lay it on us. 749 00:40:06,054 --> 00:40:07,897 I'm speakin' to you about nothin' less 750 00:40:07,972 --> 00:40:10,566 than your community's moral health! 751 00:40:11,351 --> 00:40:14,730 I'm talkin' to you about official blindness, 752 00:40:15,188 --> 00:40:19,068 official corruption, official malfeasance. 753 00:40:19,192 --> 00:40:20,944 He sure is wound up. 754 00:40:21,069 --> 00:40:24,039 Yep. I'm just waitin' for Ed Earl to get here. 755 00:40:24,197 --> 00:40:25,540 He's gonna kick that boy's ass. 756 00:40:31,412 --> 00:40:33,005 It's no big secret. 757 00:40:33,081 --> 00:40:35,504 You know what's goin' on in this town 758 00:40:35,583 --> 00:40:39,463 and what's goin' on is evil, immoral, 759 00:40:40,171 --> 00:40:42,799 brazen and against the law! 760 00:40:42,882 --> 00:40:43,929 Hit it. 761 00:40:44,008 --> 00:40:45,976 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it 762 00:40:46,052 --> 00:40:48,180 ♪ Lord, have mercy on our souls 763 00:40:48,263 --> 00:40:50,265 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it 764 00:40:50,348 --> 00:40:52,350 ♪ Lord, have mercy on our souls 765 00:40:52,433 --> 00:40:56,734 ♪ Sin is running rampant like before the fall of Rome 766 00:40:56,813 --> 00:40:59,783 ♪ Someone is permittin' you-know-what 767 00:41:00,108 --> 00:41:01,485 ♪ And it must stop 768 00:41:01,568 --> 00:41:03,366 ♪ Loveless copulation 769 00:41:03,444 --> 00:41:05,572 ♪ Stop that copulation 770 00:41:05,864 --> 00:41:07,116 ♪ Loveless copulation 771 00:41:08,324 --> 00:41:10,076 ♪ Stop that copulation 772 00:41:10,159 --> 00:41:12,036 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it 773 00:41:12,120 --> 00:41:14,214 ♪ Lord, have mercy on our souls 774 00:41:14,289 --> 00:41:16,212 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it 775 00:41:16,291 --> 00:41:18,544 ♪ Lord, have mercy on our souls 776 00:41:18,626 --> 00:41:21,800 ♪ Watchdog smells corruption and he'll fight it to the top 777 00:41:22,964 --> 00:41:25,558 Now, Sheriff, Sheriff. Keep a grip on yourself. 778 00:41:25,633 --> 00:41:26,725 Don't get your back up! 779 00:41:26,801 --> 00:41:28,849 Stop whimperin', Rufus. 780 00:41:31,389 --> 00:41:33,812 Well, if it isn't the man himself. 781 00:41:34,309 --> 00:41:36,937 Would you care to give me an interview now, Sheriff? 782 00:41:37,145 --> 00:41:40,274 I'm gonna give you 30 seconds, you fancified fart. 783 00:41:40,523 --> 00:41:42,321 Get you and your singin' chorus the hell out of town! 784 00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:43,401 Now, wait a minute. 785 00:41:43,484 --> 00:41:45,578 And get those cameras and the rest of that crap off the street. 786 00:41:45,653 --> 00:41:46,825 You're blockin' traffic! 787 00:41:46,905 --> 00:41:48,498 The only traffic we are blockin' 788 00:41:48,573 --> 00:41:50,416 is that headed out for the Chicken Ranch. 789 00:41:50,491 --> 00:41:52,038 Right, Sheriff? 790 00:41:53,161 --> 00:41:56,665 Little fat buddy, up to now you got two tickets. 791 00:41:56,915 --> 00:41:59,964 One for paradin' without a license and the other for insultin' me. 792 00:42:00,627 --> 00:42:02,675 Now, you better get that travellin' circus out of town 793 00:42:02,754 --> 00:42:05,223 or I'm gonna lock you up so fast your corset's gonna pop! 794 00:42:05,381 --> 00:42:08,260 Yeah? We're perfectly within the law. 795 00:42:08,551 --> 00:42:11,350 As a newsman, I have First Amendment protection. 796 00:42:11,554 --> 00:42:13,477 Get this. 797 00:42:14,015 --> 00:42:17,269 The public has a right to know what is goin' on out there 798 00:42:17,352 --> 00:42:20,606 and what kind of pay-off you're acceptin' to protect 799 00:42:20,688 --> 00:42:22,816 that notorious house of ill repute. 800 00:42:36,996 --> 00:42:41,467 First thing. First thing is you're standin' in Lanville County, 801 00:42:41,542 --> 00:42:44,216 which, by my figurin', is about a 100 miles west 802 00:42:44,295 --> 00:42:46,343 of that stink hole you call Houston. 803 00:42:46,464 --> 00:42:48,558 So I can't see it's any of your business 804 00:42:48,633 --> 00:42:50,101 what goes on out here. 805 00:42:50,385 --> 00:42:53,138 Yeah? Please... 806 00:42:54,013 --> 00:42:57,643 Number two. You ain't the law around here and I am. 807 00:42:58,351 --> 00:43:00,945 So don't be tellin' me what my goddamn job is, 808 00:43:01,020 --> 00:43:05,070 or I'll whip your butt so bad it'll look like the stripes on a barber pole. 809 00:43:05,191 --> 00:43:06,317 Get him, Sheriff. 810 00:43:06,401 --> 00:43:07,869 May be mean, but he's ours! 811 00:43:07,944 --> 00:43:10,663 Number three. No sawed-off little pecker 812 00:43:10,738 --> 00:43:13,833 is gonna accuse me of takin' a bribe and live to tell about it 813 00:43:13,908 --> 00:43:16,457 'cause I wear the badge in this goddamn county. 814 00:43:16,536 --> 00:43:20,291 So you listen and listen good, you over-padded, televisin' turd. 815 00:43:20,498 --> 00:43:22,626 If I ever see you or any of those little bastards 816 00:43:22,750 --> 00:43:24,627 that work for you in my town again, 817 00:43:24,752 --> 00:43:26,880 I'm gonna knock you so flat you're gonna 818 00:43:26,963 --> 00:43:28,510 have to roll down your socks to shit! 819 00:43:30,258 --> 00:43:31,851 That's tellin' him, Sheriff! 820 00:43:31,926 --> 00:43:33,223 My goodness! 821 00:43:33,428 --> 00:43:35,101 So get outta here, you goddamn, 822 00:43:35,430 --> 00:43:37,808 wig-wearin', citified son of a bitch! 823 00:43:42,854 --> 00:43:46,700 Holy shit! My God, that man's crazy! 824 00:43:53,906 --> 00:43:55,249 Move, you schmuck! 825 00:43:57,952 --> 00:43:59,795 Move this mother! Come on! 826 00:44:00,204 --> 00:44:04,129 Get outta here! Move this thing! 827 00:44:04,208 --> 00:44:07,337 Come on, move this thing! I'll get you for this. 828 00:44:07,587 --> 00:44:10,466 You son of a bitch! You'll pay for this. 829 00:44:10,590 --> 00:44:13,560 You're in trouble, Sheriff! You're in big trouble! 830 00:44:15,219 --> 00:44:16,846 So long, partner. 831 00:44:43,664 --> 00:44:47,419 Boy, you sent him hightailin'. I was so proud of you! 832 00:44:47,502 --> 00:44:48,628 Didn't I? - Yeah. 833 00:44:54,008 --> 00:44:55,681 Look at them stars. 834 00:44:57,762 --> 00:45:00,015 Well, there ain't nothin' prettier than a Texas sky. 835 00:45:00,807 --> 00:45:02,024 Ain't that the truth. 836 00:45:05,144 --> 00:45:06,646 Hey, look! Did you see that shootin' star? 837 00:45:08,689 --> 00:45:11,112 That could've been a spaceship, you know. - Yeah. 838 00:45:11,192 --> 00:45:12,232 You believe in spaceships? 839 00:45:12,276 --> 00:45:13,368 Sure. 840 00:45:13,986 --> 00:45:15,784 I saw a picture once. 841 00:45:15,863 --> 00:45:17,991 Them fellers that's supposed to be from up there. 842 00:45:18,074 --> 00:45:19,496 Fly around. 843 00:45:20,201 --> 00:45:22,750 Tiny little fellers, bald-headed. 844 00:45:22,995 --> 00:45:25,248 Little feet, little hands, got no peckers. 845 00:45:26,207 --> 00:45:27,754 Got no peckers? 846 00:45:29,168 --> 00:45:32,092 Well, I ain't interested. 847 00:45:32,880 --> 00:45:34,553 I don't think my girls would be either. 848 00:45:36,551 --> 00:45:39,976 When I was a little kid, I used to imagine a flyin' saucer 849 00:45:40,054 --> 00:45:43,558 swoopin' down and pickin' me up and takin' me off to heaven. 850 00:45:43,724 --> 00:45:45,351 Like the angels. 851 00:45:46,894 --> 00:45:50,023 "I looked, and behold, a whirlwind comin' out of the north. 852 00:45:50,106 --> 00:45:51,574 "And out of the midst of the fire came the 853 00:45:51,649 --> 00:45:53,276 "likeness of four living creatures." 854 00:45:54,902 --> 00:45:56,182 What the hell you talkin' about? 855 00:45:56,237 --> 00:45:57,409 Well, that's from the Bible. 856 00:45:57,488 --> 00:45:59,707 That's what the Bible says about spaceships in Ezekiel. 857 00:45:59,782 --> 00:46:01,159 Don't you know nothin' about the Bible? 858 00:46:01,242 --> 00:46:02,664 Yeah, I know about the Bible! 859 00:46:02,743 --> 00:46:04,943 I just don't know nothin' about no Ezekiel in the Bible. 860 00:46:05,538 --> 00:46:08,917 I knew Ezekiel Peebles once in the eighth grade. 861 00:46:10,501 --> 00:46:12,344 Think I busted his jaw. 862 00:46:13,629 --> 00:46:15,472 Well, that was very Christian of you. 863 00:46:15,548 --> 00:46:17,971 Well, most of my family was Baptist. 864 00:46:19,093 --> 00:46:21,437 Well, I never stayed with one family long enough 865 00:46:21,721 --> 00:46:23,001 to become anything in particular. 866 00:46:23,472 --> 00:46:25,941 But I read the Bible. I believe in Jesus. 867 00:46:26,726 --> 00:46:28,478 I think Jesus was... 868 00:46:28,895 --> 00:46:30,647 Was a real good man. 869 00:46:30,771 --> 00:46:32,569 And he was a heck of a speaker. 870 00:46:33,191 --> 00:46:36,946 Yep. I knew a woman once that had a vision of Jesus. 871 00:46:37,028 --> 00:46:40,578 He came right in her house, set right down at the foot of her bed. 872 00:46:42,241 --> 00:46:44,209 I don't know what I'd do if that happened to me. 873 00:46:44,619 --> 00:46:46,041 I'll tell you something, honey. 874 00:46:46,120 --> 00:46:48,873 If Jesus comes to your house, all hell's gonna break loose. 875 00:46:51,834 --> 00:46:53,711 You got a point there, Ed Earl. 876 00:46:54,003 --> 00:46:55,300 But you know, Jesus was really good 877 00:46:55,379 --> 00:46:57,131 to Mary Magdalene, the fallen woman. 878 00:46:57,632 --> 00:46:59,600 He was always bein' very sociable. 879 00:47:00,134 --> 00:47:03,855 He went to this big weddin' once and they ran out of wine. 880 00:47:04,180 --> 00:47:06,182 You know what he did? Turned the water into wine. 881 00:47:07,183 --> 00:47:09,811 Well, that's a man that knows how to throw a party. 882 00:47:10,311 --> 00:47:12,439 Now, don't be sacrilegious. 883 00:47:12,772 --> 00:47:16,026 I'm not. I'm not. He forgives me. 884 00:47:17,151 --> 00:47:18,653 He knows I was kiddin'. 885 00:47:18,778 --> 00:47:20,246 Yeah, I know he forgives you. 886 00:47:20,321 --> 00:47:22,915 That's funny, now, how God can forgive you, 887 00:47:22,990 --> 00:47:24,788 and people can't. Now why is that? 888 00:47:25,493 --> 00:47:29,714 Well, because people are not very God-like, Mona. 889 00:47:30,623 --> 00:47:31,840 I know. 890 00:47:32,750 --> 00:47:33,967 I know. 891 00:47:35,211 --> 00:47:36,337 Yeah. 892 00:47:51,018 --> 00:47:52,395 What is it? 893 00:47:54,438 --> 00:47:56,031 Melvin P. Thorpe 894 00:47:56,274 --> 00:47:58,868 is a sorry son of a bitch. 895 00:48:04,740 --> 00:48:06,540 You reckon he's gonna run for the legislature? 896 00:48:08,077 --> 00:48:09,169 Why? 897 00:48:12,206 --> 00:48:14,709 I never told anybody this, Mona, but... 898 00:48:17,378 --> 00:48:19,498 I was thinkin' of runnin' for the legislature someday. 899 00:48:20,840 --> 00:48:22,342 Are you serious, Ed Earl? 900 00:48:22,425 --> 00:48:23,551 Yeah. 901 00:48:24,760 --> 00:48:27,855 They say an honest man can't be elected in this country anymore. 902 00:48:28,639 --> 00:48:30,641 But I don't believe that. 903 00:48:31,392 --> 00:48:33,269 This is a good country. 904 00:48:34,520 --> 00:48:36,397 I believe I could win. 905 00:48:36,564 --> 00:48:39,443 Well, you got my vote. I might even go register. 906 00:48:40,443 --> 00:48:42,696 Boy, I sure didn't know you had dreams that big. 907 00:48:43,904 --> 00:48:45,497 People really do like you, though. 908 00:48:45,573 --> 00:48:46,699 They like you, too. 909 00:48:46,782 --> 00:48:47,908 Really? - Sure. 910 00:48:48,743 --> 00:48:50,711 You ask anybody in town about you. 911 00:48:50,870 --> 00:48:52,338 Say, "How do you like Miss Mona?" 912 00:48:52,413 --> 00:48:57,089 They say, "Shoot, she's a fine woman. Fine, friendly and nice." 913 00:48:58,586 --> 00:49:01,965 Well, I always just thought if you see somebody without a smile, 914 00:49:02,298 --> 00:49:03,766 you give 'em yours. 915 00:49:03,841 --> 00:49:05,263 I like that. 916 00:49:06,427 --> 00:49:07,804 I like that. 917 00:49:08,888 --> 00:49:10,936 Think I'll use that as my campaign slogan. 918 00:49:12,266 --> 00:49:15,270 If you see somebody without a smile, give 'em yours. 919 00:49:15,770 --> 00:49:17,650 I'm gonna have that printed up on a little card. 920 00:49:17,938 --> 00:49:20,942 You're kiddin' me. You smart-ass. 921 00:49:21,609 --> 00:49:23,327 I had a dream once. 922 00:49:24,111 --> 00:49:25,237 Yeah? 923 00:49:25,446 --> 00:49:26,914 I'll tell you if you won't laugh. 924 00:49:26,989 --> 00:49:28,662 I won't laugh. 925 00:49:28,741 --> 00:49:31,290 Well, I used to dream of bein' a ballerina. 926 00:49:34,830 --> 00:49:36,878 Now, Ed Earl, I ain't tellin' you nothin'. 927 00:49:36,957 --> 00:49:38,959 A ballerina? 928 00:49:39,543 --> 00:49:41,170 Yes, a ballerina! 929 00:49:41,295 --> 00:49:45,516 Well, I think that's wonderful. 930 00:49:45,800 --> 00:49:48,280 And I think you still could be a ballerina if you wanted to be. 931 00:49:48,386 --> 00:49:50,388 No, you could! Don't be ridiculous! 932 00:49:50,471 --> 00:49:53,520 Go into training right now. Just start jumpin' up and down. 933 00:49:53,599 --> 00:49:55,818 Me? Jumpin' up and down? I'd black both my eyes. 934 00:49:57,728 --> 00:49:59,856 I couldn't be a ballerina now. I'm too top-heavy. 935 00:49:59,939 --> 00:50:01,539 I have a hard enough time balancin' these 936 00:50:01,565 --> 00:50:03,533 things now, without gettin' on my toes. 937 00:50:11,659 --> 00:50:13,286 You know something? 938 00:50:13,369 --> 00:50:14,541 What? 939 00:50:14,662 --> 00:50:18,007 You know that, I don't see anybody but you anymore. 940 00:50:19,667 --> 00:50:21,427 Course, now, you can't say the same, can you? 941 00:50:25,673 --> 00:50:29,177 I haven't been to bed with another woman besides you in three years. 942 00:50:30,302 --> 00:50:32,179 You didn't know that, did you? 943 00:50:33,764 --> 00:50:35,687 No, I didn't know that. 944 00:50:38,060 --> 00:50:39,687 Nothin' better, once you've had the best. 945 00:50:41,188 --> 00:50:42,610 Hey, I like that. 946 00:50:42,690 --> 00:50:43,862 I thought you would. 947 00:50:43,941 --> 00:50:45,488 Reckon if I was to run for the legislature, 948 00:50:45,568 --> 00:50:48,287 I could, put that on my card? 949 00:51:04,253 --> 00:51:08,599 Up next, Melvin P. Thorpe continues his expose of the Chicken Ranch 950 00:51:08,674 --> 00:51:12,019 with a violent demonstration in the Gilbert town square. 951 00:51:12,303 --> 00:51:14,305 Great God from Goldsboro! 952 00:51:22,605 --> 00:51:23,697 Yeah? 953 00:51:23,772 --> 00:51:26,400 Ed Earl, you better turn on Channel 4. 954 00:51:27,067 --> 00:51:29,490 That Melvin P. Thorpe idiot's got you on TV again. 955 00:51:30,112 --> 00:51:32,331 Well, I don't give a shit, Rufus! 956 00:51:32,406 --> 00:51:34,909 It's all very well to take that attitude, Ed Earl, 957 00:51:34,992 --> 00:51:36,072 but this is serious! Honey. 958 00:51:36,660 --> 00:51:39,664 Put on the television. Channel 4. 959 00:51:40,915 --> 00:51:43,885 That Melvin P. Thorpe is shootin' off his mouth again. 960 00:51:43,959 --> 00:51:47,259 How could what he's sayin' be so goddamn important? 961 00:51:47,379 --> 00:51:51,100 Calm down, Rufus! It can't be as bad as all that. 962 00:51:52,134 --> 00:51:55,729 What happened to me as an individual is not important. 963 00:51:56,305 --> 00:51:59,275 Is this the kind of man we want runnin' our law enforcement? 964 00:51:59,725 --> 00:52:01,727 Is this the kind of foul-mouthed example 965 00:52:01,810 --> 00:52:04,438 we wanna set for our young, innocent children? 966 00:52:05,648 --> 00:52:06,945 Run the film. 967 00:52:07,024 --> 00:52:10,198 Number three. No sawed-off little ... 968 00:52:10,277 --> 00:52:12,826 is gonna accuse me of takin' a bribe and live to tell about it 969 00:52:12,905 --> 00:52:14,999 because I wear the badge in this ... county! 970 00:52:15,074 --> 00:52:18,749 So you listen and you listen good! You ...! 971 00:52:18,827 --> 00:52:20,579 If I ever see you or any of those ... 972 00:52:20,663 --> 00:52:22,165 that work for you in my town again, 973 00:52:22,248 --> 00:52:25,047 I'm gonna knock you so flat you're gonna ...! 974 00:52:31,131 --> 00:52:34,635 Ed Earl, that man has made a fool out of you. 975 00:52:38,806 --> 00:52:40,649 I've had calls from four preachers, 976 00:52:40,724 --> 00:52:43,022 six deacons, and the presidents of two garden clubs! 977 00:52:43,102 --> 00:52:44,274 Thank you for callin'. 978 00:52:44,353 --> 00:52:45,650 The phones have been ringin' like that 979 00:52:45,729 --> 00:52:48,152 all mornin' long. Sheriff's office. 980 00:52:48,232 --> 00:52:50,655 I don't know why I let people talk me into serving as mayor 981 00:52:50,734 --> 00:52:53,078 of this incorporated sand trap anyway! 982 00:52:53,529 --> 00:52:54,809 What in the heck is keepin' him? 983 00:52:54,863 --> 00:52:55,910 He'll be along. 984 00:52:56,782 --> 00:52:58,534 Well, he'd better! 985 00:52:58,617 --> 00:53:00,870 My wife couldn't believe what she saw last night. 986 00:53:00,953 --> 00:53:03,081 They bleeped him out, but she read his lips 987 00:53:03,163 --> 00:53:05,006 on every "hell," "goddamn," and "shit." 988 00:53:07,918 --> 00:53:11,639 There's some folks gettin' up a petition to close the Chicken Ranch. 989 00:53:12,006 --> 00:53:14,680 All we wanted to do was keep it quiet. 990 00:53:14,842 --> 00:53:17,061 Now, thanks to Ed Earl, it's the hottest thing 991 00:53:17,136 --> 00:53:19,104 on the air since The Gong Show. 992 00:53:19,263 --> 00:53:21,482 I'll tell him you called. Bye. Mornin', Sheriff. 993 00:53:21,557 --> 00:53:23,355 Mornin', Rita. - Here's your calls. 994 00:53:23,726 --> 00:53:25,319 Reckon you fellas are waitin' to talk to me. 995 00:53:25,394 --> 00:53:26,395 We sure are! 996 00:53:26,478 --> 00:53:27,946 You don't know the trouble you caused 997 00:53:28,022 --> 00:53:29,069 on this Chicken Ranch business! 998 00:53:29,148 --> 00:53:32,448 Dad-gum it, Ed Earl! If you ain't a pluperfect fool! 999 00:53:32,693 --> 00:53:34,946 You may be right. I got over a dozen 1000 00:53:35,029 --> 00:53:36,702 messages here from outraged citizens, 1001 00:53:36,780 --> 00:53:39,329 tellin' me that we got a whorehouse in Lanville County. 1002 00:53:39,700 --> 00:53:41,953 Only been one here for about 150 years. 1003 00:53:42,036 --> 00:53:45,040 Ed Earl, now, you can set up speed traps to catch the tourists. 1004 00:53:45,331 --> 00:53:48,631 You can look the other way when the wrong kid swipes a car to go joyriding. 1005 00:53:49,335 --> 00:53:51,508 Hell, you can even let Miss Mona run her place out there! 1006 00:53:51,587 --> 00:53:55,433 But there's one thing you can't do and that's broadcast gutter talk on TV. 1007 00:53:55,633 --> 00:53:57,306 I didn't know they was takin' pictures. 1008 00:53:57,468 --> 00:53:59,812 What did you figure the cameras were for? 1009 00:54:00,054 --> 00:54:03,308 Damn it, C.J.! You pious pissant. 1010 00:54:03,849 --> 00:54:06,944 I don't have one-tenth the trouble from Miss Mona's that I have from you 1011 00:54:07,019 --> 00:54:10,398 for one of your all-night stag parties over at the Legionnaire Hall. 1012 00:54:10,898 --> 00:54:12,366 That ain't fair, dang it! 1013 00:54:12,441 --> 00:54:13,488 There's just one thing to do. 1014 00:54:13,567 --> 00:54:14,989 And that's close the place down before 1015 00:54:15,069 --> 00:54:16,321 we all go to hell in a hand basket. 1016 00:54:16,403 --> 00:54:20,124 Close it down! She was just fine as long as she was bringin' in the money 1017 00:54:20,199 --> 00:54:21,542 and makin' civic contributions, 1018 00:54:21,617 --> 00:54:24,461 but the moment her luck ran sour, you want to run out on her. 1019 00:54:24,912 --> 00:54:27,631 Run out on her like rats from a burnin' barn! 1020 00:54:27,998 --> 00:54:31,753 That's just it, Ed Earl. Who's gonna put out that fire? 1021 00:54:31,877 --> 00:54:33,470 Look, if you won't close her down, at least 1022 00:54:33,545 --> 00:54:35,225 tell her to lay low for a couple of months! 1023 00:54:35,297 --> 00:54:38,221 Yeah, just until the heat wears off a little bit. 1024 00:54:38,300 --> 00:54:40,223 Give it two months. What's two months? 1025 00:54:40,969 --> 00:54:43,848 Nobody tells me how to run my goddam job, 1026 00:54:43,931 --> 00:54:45,729 and nobody gives me advice! 1027 00:54:46,100 --> 00:54:50,571 I'll do things my own way. I'm gonna make up my own damn mind! 1028 00:54:51,563 --> 00:54:53,486 Two months. What's two months? 1029 00:54:53,565 --> 00:54:55,818 Shut down for two months! 1030 00:54:56,360 --> 00:54:59,660 That is a hell of a lot to ask somebody, Ed Earl. 1031 00:54:59,947 --> 00:55:01,369 And that's a hell of a lot of overhead 1032 00:55:01,448 --> 00:55:03,701 to pay out when cash ain't comin' in. 1033 00:55:04,201 --> 00:55:05,874 What d'you think I ought to tell my girls? 1034 00:55:05,953 --> 00:55:07,671 Well, maybe it won't be two months. 1035 00:55:07,746 --> 00:55:09,214 The holidays are comin' up. 1036 00:55:09,289 --> 00:55:11,132 Maybe in a couple of weeks the whole thing will blow over 1037 00:55:11,208 --> 00:55:12,505 and then you can let your regular customers... 1038 00:55:12,584 --> 00:55:16,805 I warned you yesterday about losin' your temper and carryin' on. 1039 00:55:17,047 --> 00:55:18,845 Last night you said you was proud of me. 1040 00:55:19,007 --> 00:55:21,977 Last night I wasn't on the 11:00 news! 1041 00:55:22,511 --> 00:55:25,685 Well, I didn't know that son of a bitch was gonna make an idiot out of me. 1042 00:55:25,848 --> 00:55:27,942 I don't know anything about that electronic bullshit! 1043 00:55:28,016 --> 00:55:29,859 How was I supposed to handle that situation? 1044 00:55:30,352 --> 00:55:33,902 That's your job, Ed Earl. Ain't that what they pay you for? 1045 00:55:34,064 --> 00:55:37,443 I know what my job is! Don't be tellin' me what my goddamn job is! 1046 00:55:37,526 --> 00:55:39,995 I could close this place down in a New York minute! 1047 00:55:40,612 --> 00:55:43,240 All I'm askin' for is for you to give me a little cooperation 1048 00:55:43,323 --> 00:55:45,325 so I can get through a difficult situation 1049 00:55:45,492 --> 00:55:47,244 with as little trouble as possible! 1050 00:55:47,327 --> 00:55:50,456 Okay, okay, okay! I'll shut it down. 1051 00:55:50,706 --> 00:55:51,707 You will? 1052 00:55:51,999 --> 00:55:54,172 What do you want, a written contract? 1053 00:55:54,877 --> 00:55:55,969 You promise? 1054 00:55:56,336 --> 00:55:58,839 Ed Earl, I am givin' you my word. 1055 00:56:03,594 --> 00:56:06,017 I'm sorry, Mona, about the whole situation. 1056 00:56:06,889 --> 00:56:08,857 Don't feel sorry for me. 1057 00:56:09,725 --> 00:56:13,775 I started out poor, and I worked my way up to outcast. 1058 00:56:16,982 --> 00:56:18,609 I know what I'm askin' you to do is gonna 1059 00:56:18,692 --> 00:56:20,452 turn out to be the best thing for both of us. 1060 00:56:21,069 --> 00:56:22,571 Just trust me. 1061 00:56:26,533 --> 00:56:28,410 You know what burns my ass? 1062 00:56:28,494 --> 00:56:29,620 What? 1063 00:56:29,703 --> 00:56:32,081 A flame about three feet high. 1064 00:56:33,499 --> 00:56:36,628 Of course I trust you, you big cowboy. Ain't I always? 1065 00:56:38,295 --> 00:56:40,047 No need to stop now. 1066 00:56:42,132 --> 00:56:43,850 Now get out of here. 1067 00:56:44,218 --> 00:56:45,891 Everything's gonna turn out just fine. 1068 00:56:46,178 --> 00:56:48,180 Don't you worry about a thing, honey. 1069 00:56:48,472 --> 00:56:51,100 Everything's gonna turn out slicker than cat shit 1070 00:56:51,225 --> 00:56:53,023 on a linoleum floor. 1071 00:56:58,941 --> 00:57:00,659 Well, if it ain't the celebrated 1072 00:57:00,734 --> 00:57:02,657 cussin' sheriff of Lanville County. 1073 00:57:03,153 --> 00:57:04,325 How are you, Sheriff? 1074 00:57:04,404 --> 00:57:06,122 I'm fine. How are you, Porky? 1075 00:57:06,198 --> 00:57:10,169 Sheriff! I been real good all week. I've lost six pounds. 1076 00:57:10,244 --> 00:57:13,874 Yeah? Well, don't take nothin' off them cheeks. 1077 00:57:13,956 --> 00:57:15,299 Go on. 1078 00:57:20,045 --> 00:57:22,514 Well, Jewel, I just promised the sheriff 1079 00:57:22,589 --> 00:57:24,387 that we're gonna shut down for two months. 1080 00:57:25,217 --> 00:57:27,345 What? How can you promise that? 1081 00:57:27,761 --> 00:57:30,264 What about the football game celebration tomorrow night? 1082 00:57:31,348 --> 00:57:33,646 I forgot all about that. 1083 00:57:33,767 --> 00:57:36,987 It's the Thanksgiving game, Miss Mona. And that's real special. 1084 00:57:37,104 --> 00:57:38,344 Well I know it's special, Jewel! 1085 00:57:38,397 --> 00:57:39,523 But I don't know what to do now. 1086 00:57:39,606 --> 00:57:41,108 I did promise. 1087 00:57:41,191 --> 00:57:43,068 You think if we just close the doors to the regular customers, 1088 00:57:43,151 --> 00:57:45,700 just went on with the party as planned, that'd be all right? 1089 00:57:45,946 --> 00:57:50,122 I'm sure it will, honey. That party is a bigger tradition than the game. 1090 00:57:58,125 --> 00:58:01,379 65,000-plus on hand here at Kyle Field, 1091 00:58:01,461 --> 00:58:03,964 and we have seen an amazing ball game. 1092 00:58:04,089 --> 00:58:07,719 Texas A&M heavily favored, but we're tied 12-12. 1093 00:58:07,801 --> 00:58:09,644 Aggies have the ball, second down at eight. 1094 00:58:09,720 --> 00:58:11,518 Time is winding down. 1095 00:58:12,890 --> 00:58:14,733 They try the middle of the Texas defense, 1096 00:58:14,808 --> 00:58:17,106 and again, the Longhorns' break is stopped. 1097 00:58:17,185 --> 00:58:18,778 This University of Texas defense... 1098 00:58:24,985 --> 00:58:26,578 We string up the white first 1099 00:58:26,653 --> 00:58:29,657 and after we see who wins, we put up the orange or the maroon. 1100 00:58:29,740 --> 00:58:31,492 Yes, ma'am. 1101 00:58:32,868 --> 00:58:34,996 I can't stand it if them Aggies win. 1102 00:58:35,078 --> 00:58:36,250 What do you mean? 1103 00:58:36,330 --> 00:58:39,675 They're such animals. Always yellin' and jumpin' about 1104 00:58:39,750 --> 00:58:41,252 and sayin' "yee-haw!" 1105 00:58:41,335 --> 00:58:42,928 If they have to go for all the marbles, 1106 00:58:43,003 --> 00:58:45,176 they will have to throw to the end zone right now. 1107 00:58:45,797 --> 00:58:48,846 Time running out. Miller rolls to the right. Pass! Touchdown! 1108 00:58:51,011 --> 00:58:52,103 Yeah! 1109 00:58:52,346 --> 00:58:54,519 Hell! That calls for a drink. 1110 00:58:55,057 --> 00:58:56,229 Talk about the part 1111 00:58:56,308 --> 00:58:58,310 that emotion plays in a game like this! 1112 00:58:58,602 --> 00:59:00,082 Don't let your mother see you do that. 1113 00:59:00,687 --> 00:59:01,984 Well, who won? 1114 00:59:02,064 --> 00:59:03,111 The Aggies. 1115 00:59:03,190 --> 00:59:04,487 Shit. 1116 00:59:12,407 --> 00:59:13,784 Hey, boys! 1117 00:59:16,286 --> 00:59:18,334 All right! Hey, boys! 1118 00:59:19,581 --> 00:59:23,711 Boys, boys! That was the greatest victory 1119 00:59:23,794 --> 00:59:26,047 since General Eisenhower won! 1120 00:59:26,380 --> 00:59:29,054 Senator, you ain't forgot you was gonna 1121 00:59:29,132 --> 00:59:31,260 take us to the Chicken Ranch, did ya? 1122 00:59:31,343 --> 00:59:32,970 Yeah! How about it? 1123 00:59:33,053 --> 00:59:35,431 I always keep my campaign promises? 1124 00:59:36,556 --> 00:59:39,230 Yes, sir. The Chicken Ranch is a fine institution, 1125 00:59:39,309 --> 00:59:41,482 and I'm proud to have it in my district. 1126 00:59:41,561 --> 00:59:44,235 And to hell with what Melvin P. Thorpe says! 1127 00:59:45,983 --> 00:59:48,907 I'll see all you seniors out at Miss Mona's. 1128 00:59:58,620 --> 01:00:00,839 ♪ We're gonna whomp and stomp 1129 01:00:00,914 --> 01:00:02,632 ♪ And we'll whoop it up 1130 01:00:02,708 --> 01:00:05,757 ♪ Tonight 1131 01:00:06,420 --> 01:00:10,141 ♪ Those little gals won't never ever 1132 01:00:10,215 --> 01:00:11,762 ♪ Be the same 1133 01:00:13,301 --> 01:00:16,931 ♪ They're gonna love it when we whomp and stomp 1134 01:00:17,014 --> 01:00:22,646 ♪ And whoop it up All right 1135 01:00:22,894 --> 01:00:27,866 ♪ It's even better than an Aggie football game 1136 01:00:28,692 --> 01:00:31,286 Better than a football game? 1137 01:00:31,778 --> 01:00:35,499 ♪ And then we're gonna show them all 1138 01:00:35,574 --> 01:00:37,952 ♪ A thing or two 1139 01:00:39,703 --> 01:00:42,582 ♪ We're gonna demonstrate 1140 01:00:42,664 --> 01:00:47,261 ♪ Just what a champion can do 1141 01:00:47,335 --> 01:00:52,216 ♪ 75 miles until we get to heaven 1142 01:00:52,299 --> 01:00:57,055 ♪ 75 miles until our plans are laid 1143 01:00:57,345 --> 01:01:02,397 ♪ 75 miles until we get to the Chicken Ranch 1144 01:01:02,476 --> 01:01:05,571 ♪ Where history and Aggie boys 1145 01:01:05,645 --> 01:01:10,526 ♪ Get made 1146 01:01:43,809 --> 01:01:45,607 Get out of the way! 1147 01:01:45,727 --> 01:01:47,821 Look it here! Watch this. 1148 01:02:14,506 --> 01:02:16,725 All right! Hey, come on. 1149 01:02:19,136 --> 01:02:20,388 Atta boy! 1150 01:02:20,971 --> 01:02:25,147 Yeah! Come on! All right! 1151 01:02:29,563 --> 01:02:30,906 All right! 1152 01:03:09,186 --> 01:03:14,613 ♪ 22 miles until we get to heaven 1153 01:03:14,691 --> 01:03:19,071 ♪ 22 miles until our plans are laid 1154 01:03:19,196 --> 01:03:23,997 ♪ 22 miles until we get to the Chicken Ranch 1155 01:03:24,075 --> 01:03:27,045 ♪ Where history and Aggie boys 1156 01:03:27,120 --> 01:03:30,545 ♪ Get made 1157 01:03:43,887 --> 01:03:45,810 What the hell happened? 1158 01:03:50,310 --> 01:03:53,063 Do we have to wear these ball gowns again? 1159 01:03:53,146 --> 01:03:56,446 Yes, you do, and I don't wanna hear any more bitchin' about it. 1160 01:03:56,942 --> 01:04:00,162 Miss Mona likes to create somethin' special for the boys. 1161 01:04:00,487 --> 01:04:02,660 It's like a graduation dance. 1162 01:04:22,926 --> 01:04:26,976 ♪ One more mile until we get to heaven 1163 01:04:27,138 --> 01:04:30,768 ♪ One more mile until our plans are laid 1164 01:04:31,101 --> 01:04:34,696 ♪ One more mile until we get to the Chicken Ranch 1165 01:04:34,854 --> 01:04:38,108 ♪ Where history and Aggie boys 1166 01:04:38,191 --> 01:04:42,287 ♪ Get made 1167 01:04:51,037 --> 01:04:52,289 Y'all come on in! 1168 01:04:53,331 --> 01:04:55,049 I'm so glad to see ya. 1169 01:04:55,166 --> 01:04:56,509 Congratulations! 1170 01:04:56,584 --> 01:04:58,632 Hey, boys! I think you'll find 1171 01:04:58,712 --> 01:05:00,840 it's a fittin' celebration for today's victory! 1172 01:05:05,176 --> 01:05:06,553 Howdy, boys! 1173 01:05:07,971 --> 01:05:10,019 Howdy, ma'am. I'm Senator Wingwood 1174 01:05:10,098 --> 01:05:12,977 of the 19th District and the Aggie class of '49. 1175 01:05:13,059 --> 01:05:14,481 Mighty proud to meet you. 1176 01:05:14,561 --> 01:05:17,735 To meet me! Charlie, who you think you're talkin' to? 1177 01:05:17,814 --> 01:05:19,657 How's Mary Margaret and the kids? 1178 01:05:21,693 --> 01:05:24,037 Hell, Miss Mona, I didn't think you'd remember. 1179 01:05:24,112 --> 01:05:26,661 Remember? Did you remember to bring my check? 1180 01:05:26,823 --> 01:05:29,246 I got it right here. 1181 01:05:29,951 --> 01:05:31,999 Good. You know it's always a business 1182 01:05:32,078 --> 01:05:33,375 doin' pleasure with you, Charlie. 1183 01:05:34,789 --> 01:05:36,006 You boys head on out back. 1184 01:05:36,082 --> 01:05:37,925 We've got a nice surprise for you. 1185 01:05:38,001 --> 01:05:39,002 Come on, boys! 1186 01:05:52,932 --> 01:05:56,436 Boys! 1187 01:06:00,440 --> 01:06:01,487 Hi! 1188 01:09:38,533 --> 01:09:40,831 ♪ Texas has a whorehouse in it 1189 01:10:14,444 --> 01:10:16,242 It's me, Deputy Fred! 1190 01:10:16,529 --> 01:10:18,702 Come on in, Fred! 1191 01:10:19,741 --> 01:10:20,867 Evenin', Sheriff. 1192 01:10:21,034 --> 01:10:22,474 Happy Thanksgiving. You want a drink? 1193 01:10:22,535 --> 01:10:25,755 No, thank you. That stuff always tears up my stomach. 1194 01:10:25,830 --> 01:10:27,252 I was readin' in The Reader's Digest... 1195 01:10:27,332 --> 01:10:29,130 What d'you want, Fred? 1196 01:10:29,208 --> 01:10:32,178 I was makin' my rounds around town, 1197 01:10:32,378 --> 01:10:34,506 and I saw that Melvin P. Thorpe and a bunch of other fellers 1198 01:10:34,589 --> 01:10:36,709 and they was all headed out towards the Chicken Ranch. 1199 01:10:36,799 --> 01:10:37,925 Melvin P. Thorpe. 1200 01:10:38,134 --> 01:10:40,603 Goin' out to the Chicken Ranch, was he? 1201 01:10:40,720 --> 01:10:42,563 Yeah? 1202 01:10:43,890 --> 01:10:46,564 He's gonna be real disappointed! 1203 01:10:47,602 --> 01:10:49,070 See, there ain't nothin' goin' on out there. 1204 01:10:49,145 --> 01:10:51,068 Miss Mona promised me to close the place down for two months. 1205 01:10:51,189 --> 01:10:54,159 Well, she didn't. I was out there earlier this evenin'. 1206 01:10:54,233 --> 01:10:56,486 Those Aggies was just celebratin' to beat the band. 1207 01:10:58,655 --> 01:10:59,872 No. 1208 01:11:01,240 --> 01:11:02,412 Shit! 1209 01:11:38,903 --> 01:11:40,280 Quiet. 1210 01:11:43,825 --> 01:11:47,955 This may be the most important scoop of my television career. 1211 01:11:51,499 --> 01:11:53,922 Not now! Idiot boy. 1212 01:11:56,546 --> 01:11:58,719 Give me that. Now. 1213 01:11:59,298 --> 01:12:03,348 Good neighbors, we're about to enter the whorehouse itself. 1214 01:12:03,428 --> 01:12:04,896 Cut. Come on. 1215 01:12:05,638 --> 01:12:08,812 Stay with me. Come on. Come on, boys. 1216 01:12:09,350 --> 01:12:11,398 No! There's been a party here. 1217 01:12:11,477 --> 01:12:13,104 Watch your step. 1218 01:12:15,857 --> 01:12:17,234 Hold this. 1219 01:12:23,322 --> 01:12:24,665 And quiet. 1220 01:12:26,033 --> 01:12:28,001 Billy Joe, light switch. 1221 01:12:33,124 --> 01:12:35,547 Come on. No! 1222 01:12:39,672 --> 01:12:40,924 Careful. 1223 01:12:43,926 --> 01:12:46,850 Henry. Lights. Light switch. 1224 01:12:47,054 --> 01:12:49,728 Watch me. You know what you gotta do. 1225 01:12:50,057 --> 01:12:52,401 Wait. Bingo. 1226 01:12:52,935 --> 01:12:55,484 Lights! Everybody up! 1227 01:12:58,399 --> 01:13:00,743 Let's go! 1228 01:13:00,818 --> 01:13:02,695 All right! Come along! 1229 01:13:06,032 --> 01:13:07,375 Shit! 1230 01:13:13,456 --> 01:13:15,299 Jewel, what in hell is goin' on? 1231 01:13:15,374 --> 01:13:18,048 Call the Sheriff! It's that Melvin P. Thorpe sucker! 1232 01:13:23,257 --> 01:13:25,680 They're smokin' cocaine! 1233 01:13:25,760 --> 01:13:27,137 Take their picture! 1234 01:13:35,895 --> 01:13:37,818 All right, take this! 1235 01:13:37,897 --> 01:13:40,070 Take her picture! Thank you! 1236 01:14:12,890 --> 01:14:14,483 Excuse me, ma'am. 1237 01:14:14,559 --> 01:14:16,857 Y'all come back now, you hear? 1238 01:14:17,937 --> 01:14:20,031 Come on! Look who's here. 1239 01:14:20,106 --> 01:14:24,452 Senator, the eyes of Texas are upon you. 1240 01:14:27,280 --> 01:14:29,282 Come on, boys! We gotta leave. 1241 01:14:29,782 --> 01:14:31,455 Thank you, ma'am. 1242 01:14:37,331 --> 01:14:39,629 Miss Mona! 1243 01:14:40,084 --> 01:14:42,303 Melvin P. Thorpe. Gotcha! 1244 01:14:44,964 --> 01:14:48,468 Let's get to those vans! We're gonna make the mornin' news! 1245 01:15:19,248 --> 01:15:21,342 See you on TV! 1246 01:15:21,626 --> 01:15:23,003 Holy shit! 1247 01:15:24,086 --> 01:15:25,429 God almighty. 1248 01:15:39,810 --> 01:15:41,312 Damn it! You gave me your word! 1249 01:15:41,395 --> 01:15:42,988 You gave me your word and I took it! 1250 01:15:43,064 --> 01:15:44,111 Now, I'm the law! 1251 01:15:44,190 --> 01:15:45,942 The law! You wanna talk about the law! 1252 01:15:46,025 --> 01:15:48,403 A bunch of crazies break into my house tonight, 1253 01:15:48,569 --> 01:15:51,072 comin' in here, takin' pictures, invadin' my privacy, 1254 01:15:51,155 --> 01:15:53,533 and you wanna know what the law's gonna do about that? 1255 01:15:53,616 --> 01:15:54,868 I can tell you. Nothin'! 1256 01:15:54,951 --> 01:15:56,669 They'd have no reason to do nothin' 1257 01:15:56,744 --> 01:15:58,291 if you'd done what you said you were gonna do! 1258 01:15:58,371 --> 01:16:00,669 I trusted you. That's what hurt. I trusted you! 1259 01:16:00,748 --> 01:16:04,798 Don't you talk to me about trust! I trusted you to protect me! 1260 01:16:04,877 --> 01:16:07,596 I made a mistake tonight, okay? 1261 01:16:08,005 --> 01:16:11,384 If that's your idea of an apology, it ain't worth armadillo crap. 1262 01:16:11,467 --> 01:16:12,889 Well, I ain't apologizin'! 1263 01:16:12,969 --> 01:16:15,313 I'm a business woman payin' out double taxes! 1264 01:16:15,388 --> 01:16:18,062 I expect a little protection for my money! 1265 01:16:18,140 --> 01:16:20,268 Where were you tonight? I couldn't get you on the phone... 1266 01:16:20,351 --> 01:16:22,024 I was home in bed, because you gave me 1267 01:16:22,103 --> 01:16:23,605 your word you were closin' down. 1268 01:16:23,729 --> 01:16:25,652 Well, if Sheriff Jack Roy Wallace was here, 1269 01:16:25,731 --> 01:16:27,011 none of this would have happened. 1270 01:16:27,066 --> 01:16:28,568 Sheriff Jack Roy Wallace couldn't 1271 01:16:28,651 --> 01:16:30,449 hold my jock! - You can't handle the job! 1272 01:16:30,528 --> 01:16:33,122 God damn it, Mona, you're makin' me mad! 1273 01:16:33,197 --> 01:16:37,748 Listen at him cuss and shout. Just like on TV! 1274 01:16:37,910 --> 01:16:40,629 You're just a kid playin' at bein' a cowboy. 1275 01:16:40,705 --> 01:16:42,924 You ain't never gonna grow up! 1276 01:16:43,165 --> 01:16:45,259 You use me as your mistress. 1277 01:16:45,334 --> 01:16:48,383 You use that damn Dulcie Mae as your in-town wife. 1278 01:16:48,462 --> 01:16:50,885 And you even use that little boy of hers 1279 01:16:50,965 --> 01:16:52,842 so you can play weekend daddy! 1280 01:16:52,925 --> 01:16:54,017 Leave that boy out of it! 1281 01:16:54,093 --> 01:16:55,390 You're playin', Ed Earl. 1282 01:16:55,469 --> 01:16:58,723 You're just a big, overgrown kid playin' at bein' a man! 1283 01:16:59,098 --> 01:17:03,103 I don't have to listen to this shit. Damn it! I'm the law. 1284 01:17:03,185 --> 01:17:06,485 If I choose to, I'll close this place down till hell freezes over. 1285 01:17:06,772 --> 01:17:10,697 Don't you threaten me. I'm tellin' the truth, and you know it! 1286 01:17:11,235 --> 01:17:14,865 And all of your big dreams of goin' to the legislature. 1287 01:17:15,448 --> 01:17:17,246 That's all they are. They're just dreams, 1288 01:17:17,658 --> 01:17:20,537 'cause you ain't never gonna be no more than you are right now. 1289 01:17:20,619 --> 01:17:23,623 A chicken-shit sheriff in a chicken-shit town. 1290 01:17:26,709 --> 01:17:28,177 You may be right. 1291 01:17:28,252 --> 01:17:30,092 It's a hell of a lot better than bein' a whore. 1292 01:18:33,526 --> 01:18:37,201 Legalized prostitution, pro or con, is in the news today. 1293 01:18:37,279 --> 01:18:41,079 For a report, here is Jeff Gerald in Gilbert, Texas. 1294 01:18:42,368 --> 01:18:45,212 The Chicken Ranch, the legendary, long-running bawdy house, 1295 01:18:45,287 --> 01:18:47,790 is showing little activity after the disclosure yesterday 1296 01:18:47,873 --> 01:18:49,250 of the Thanksgiving night raid. 1297 01:18:49,708 --> 01:18:50,709 Get away! 1298 01:18:50,793 --> 01:18:52,136 The deputy at the front gate keeps away onlookers 1299 01:18:52,211 --> 01:18:53,212 and potential customers, 1300 01:18:53,462 --> 01:18:55,142 while up at the house, the doors are closed 1301 01:18:55,172 --> 01:18:56,765 and the principals are not talking. 1302 01:18:58,175 --> 01:19:00,849 The sheriff of Gilbert, Ed Earl Dodd, refused interviews, 1303 01:19:00,928 --> 01:19:03,147 while in Houston, the man who launched the campaign, 1304 01:19:03,222 --> 01:19:05,065 consumer advocate Melvin P. Thorpe, 1305 01:19:05,141 --> 01:19:06,661 held a press conference this afternoon. 1306 01:19:07,059 --> 01:19:09,482 I have a report here that says that the Chicken Ranch 1307 01:19:09,562 --> 01:19:13,612 is involved with and under the influence of organized crime. 1308 01:19:13,899 --> 01:19:16,948 I myself am gonna take this report to Austin 1309 01:19:17,027 --> 01:19:18,745 in the hopes that the Governor himself 1310 01:19:18,946 --> 01:19:20,698 will come out of his long silence 1311 01:19:20,823 --> 01:19:23,292 on this issue and uphold the law. 1312 01:19:24,451 --> 01:19:26,169 And... Thank you. Thank you very much. 1313 01:19:27,037 --> 01:19:29,005 At the capitol today, the Governor made no statement, 1314 01:19:29,081 --> 01:19:30,628 but Senator Charles Wingwood, 1315 01:19:30,749 --> 01:19:32,829 who was a principal figure in the Watchdog news raid, 1316 01:19:33,043 --> 01:19:35,421 also held a press conference explaining his involvement. 1317 01:19:35,921 --> 01:19:39,516 I have no independent recollection of going to the Chicken Ranch. 1318 01:19:39,592 --> 01:19:42,015 And I can only say, as the most dedicated 1319 01:19:42,094 --> 01:19:44,472 anticommunist in the state legislature, 1320 01:19:44,555 --> 01:19:46,102 that I must have been drugged 1321 01:19:46,182 --> 01:19:48,526 by communists or communist sympathizers 1322 01:19:48,601 --> 01:19:52,447 and placed there to harm my reputation and good name. 1323 01:19:52,688 --> 01:19:55,111 Reaction across the state is split 50-50. 1324 01:19:55,191 --> 01:19:56,363 But here in the town of Gilbert, 1325 01:19:56,442 --> 01:19:58,115 the Chicken Ranch has many supporters. 1326 01:19:58,611 --> 01:20:01,114 I ain't never seen anything bad come out of there yet, 1327 01:20:01,197 --> 01:20:02,949 and I've lived here all my life. 1328 01:20:03,407 --> 01:20:06,377 Why, they attract a lot of business to the community. 1329 01:20:06,452 --> 01:20:09,331 They pay their taxes. Just like you and me! 1330 01:20:09,914 --> 01:20:13,293 No one. No one was ever forced to go up there. 1331 01:20:13,626 --> 01:20:17,005 My Frank, when he was alive, used to go up there every Saturday. 1332 01:20:17,087 --> 01:20:21,058 I took it as a blessin'. Of course, things were different then. 1333 01:20:21,383 --> 01:20:25,058 Nowadays women enjoy doin' that sort of thing themselves. 1334 01:20:25,638 --> 01:20:27,766 At least, so I've been told. 1335 01:20:28,057 --> 01:20:31,061 The Chicken Ranch? I think it's a good idea. 1336 01:20:31,143 --> 01:20:32,440 See, you take a lot of young boys 1337 01:20:32,519 --> 01:20:34,362 and they're gonna be out there lookin' for women. 1338 01:20:34,438 --> 01:20:36,315 If they can't find 'em, they'll rape 'em. 1339 01:20:36,649 --> 01:20:39,778 And if they don't do that, they'll run to other women and get diseases! 1340 01:20:40,152 --> 01:20:41,745 Those girls went to doctors. 1341 01:20:41,820 --> 01:20:45,165 Although petitions are being circulated to save the Chicken Ranch, 1342 01:20:45,241 --> 01:20:48,085 already this bumper sticker is beginning to appear around the state. 1343 01:20:48,911 --> 01:20:51,005 And so, as feminists line up behind the bill 1344 01:20:51,080 --> 01:20:52,753 for the decriminalization of prostitution 1345 01:20:52,831 --> 01:20:56,085 already in the legislature, while traditionalists and fundamentalists 1346 01:20:56,168 --> 01:20:58,512 lobby for its defeat, the fate of the Chicken Ranch 1347 01:20:58,587 --> 01:20:59,713 rests with the Governor, 1348 01:20:59,797 --> 01:21:01,265 who today, again, was unavailable for comment. 1349 01:21:02,675 --> 01:21:04,677 Jeff Gerald, ABC News, Gilbert, Texas. 1350 01:21:05,010 --> 01:21:07,012 Thank you, Jeff. If there are further developements... 1351 01:21:09,056 --> 01:21:11,150 Well, I hate admitting I was wrong, Miss Mona. 1352 01:21:11,642 --> 01:21:14,395 But with television broadcasting this from hell to breakfast, 1353 01:21:14,687 --> 01:21:17,861 we should've done what the sheriff said and kept this place closed. 1354 01:21:18,857 --> 01:21:22,327 It was my fault, Jewel. It was my decision. 1355 01:21:22,444 --> 01:21:24,446 He ain't gonna be able to stop it this time, is he? 1356 01:21:25,406 --> 01:21:29,036 No. He'd like to, but he's out of his league. 1357 01:21:29,118 --> 01:21:30,586 He don't know how to fight 'em. 1358 01:21:31,370 --> 01:21:34,874 He's just a good old boy that ain't never gonna grow up. 1359 01:21:35,582 --> 01:21:37,710 Honey, we see everything in this profession. 1360 01:21:38,127 --> 01:21:41,848 But one thing I ain't never seen, man nor woman, is a grown-up. 1361 01:21:41,922 --> 01:21:45,017 Don't be too hard on him. He loves you. 1362 01:21:48,887 --> 01:21:50,560 Well, he ain't never said it. 1363 01:21:52,099 --> 01:21:54,318 Some men can't say the words, honey. 1364 01:21:55,144 --> 01:21:57,272 But that don't mean they don't feel it in their heart. 1365 01:21:59,106 --> 01:22:01,780 Well, it's just as well anyhow, Jewel. 1366 01:22:02,484 --> 01:22:05,078 I set my course a long time ago 1367 01:22:05,904 --> 01:22:08,077 and I can't go changin' now. 1368 01:22:13,329 --> 01:22:14,769 Well, I don't know what to do. 1369 01:22:14,955 --> 01:22:18,425 Seems like folks got nothin' else to talk about but this Chicken Ranch mess. 1370 01:22:18,625 --> 01:22:21,504 Like a broken record. Chicken Ranch! 1371 01:22:21,587 --> 01:22:25,182 And all of this bad publicity's flat ruinin' business. 1372 01:22:25,257 --> 01:22:26,457 I haven't sold a car in a week. 1373 01:22:26,508 --> 01:22:28,385 It's ruinin' the town. 1374 01:22:28,802 --> 01:22:31,976 No one's blamin' you, Ed Earl. It ain't your fault. 1375 01:22:32,139 --> 01:22:34,517 But we can't just sit around here waitin' to grow tits! 1376 01:22:34,600 --> 01:22:38,195 Now, now, the way I see it, the Chicken Ranch served a purpose once. 1377 01:22:38,270 --> 01:22:40,272 But now everything's openin' up. 1378 01:22:40,439 --> 01:22:44,114 Do you know we are in the middle of a worldwide sexual revolution? 1379 01:22:44,234 --> 01:22:47,238 Why, Miss Mona's ain't obscene. It's just obsolete. 1380 01:22:47,321 --> 01:22:50,541 She ain't got a handful of supporters left, Ed Earl. 1381 01:22:50,616 --> 01:22:53,119 All this publicity's makin' folks think twice 1382 01:22:53,202 --> 01:22:55,580 about signin' that petition to keep her open! 1383 01:22:55,788 --> 01:22:58,041 Why the hell can't that station in Houston 1384 01:22:58,123 --> 01:23:00,717 turn its cameras to the cesspool in their own backyard? 1385 01:23:00,793 --> 01:23:03,797 And how about Austin? Why, two blocks from the state capitol, 1386 01:23:03,879 --> 01:23:04,971 you can have anything done to you 1387 01:23:05,047 --> 01:23:07,300 for money that you can get in Tangier! 1388 01:23:07,508 --> 01:23:09,886 Well, there's naked massages, there's tongue baths, 1389 01:23:09,968 --> 01:23:12,562 there's somebody ticklin' your ass with a feather. 1390 01:23:12,638 --> 01:23:16,688 If you know that for a fact, Mr. Newspaper Editor, 1391 01:23:16,767 --> 01:23:18,690 it's your duty to expose it! 1392 01:23:18,769 --> 01:23:20,237 Well, now, you see here, C.J.! 1393 01:23:20,312 --> 01:23:21,404 I don't give a damn 1394 01:23:21,480 --> 01:23:23,903 if folks want their ass tickled with a feather! 1395 01:23:23,982 --> 01:23:26,906 I kind of like to think that that's what heaven is all about. 1396 01:23:29,947 --> 01:23:32,996 Boys, I got myself a pretty good bullshit detector. 1397 01:23:33,992 --> 01:23:36,040 And I can tell when somebody's peein' on my boots 1398 01:23:36,120 --> 01:23:37,713 and tellin' me it's a rainstorm. 1399 01:23:38,705 --> 01:23:41,925 Now, this thing's gotten way out of hand. I don't know how. 1400 01:23:42,584 --> 01:23:44,424 But I figure there's only one thing left to do. 1401 01:23:44,711 --> 01:23:46,008 Close it down! 1402 01:23:46,505 --> 01:23:49,179 No. I'm goin' to Austin. 1403 01:23:49,758 --> 01:23:53,683 See the Governor, tell him Miss Mona's side of the situation. 1404 01:23:54,680 --> 01:23:57,149 He sure as hell ain't gonna hear about it from anybody in this room. 1405 01:23:57,224 --> 01:23:58,976 You can't go up and see the Governor! 1406 01:23:59,059 --> 01:24:00,857 He don't see anybody! 1407 01:24:01,019 --> 01:24:02,487 He'll see me. 1408 01:24:15,742 --> 01:24:17,710 Feel like the country dog in the city. 1409 01:24:17,995 --> 01:24:19,463 If I stand still, they screw me. 1410 01:24:19,538 --> 01:24:20,915 If I run, they bite me in the ass. 1411 01:24:23,083 --> 01:24:24,460 I wish 1412 01:24:25,544 --> 01:24:27,012 there was somethin' I could do. 1413 01:24:28,380 --> 01:24:29,723 Thank you. 1414 01:24:32,718 --> 01:24:34,265 They want me to close her down, 1415 01:24:35,095 --> 01:24:36,893 run her out of town. 1416 01:24:40,184 --> 01:24:42,937 How can I ask her to leave when all I want her to do is stay? 1417 01:25:04,541 --> 01:25:08,216 Ladies and gentlemen, His Excellency, the Governor of Texas. 1418 01:25:12,716 --> 01:25:14,434 My friends, I want to thank you 1419 01:25:14,510 --> 01:25:17,354 for that sincere and heart-warming ovation. 1420 01:25:17,429 --> 01:25:18,521 No questions, please. 1421 01:25:19,806 --> 01:25:22,605 Governor, what do you think of the crisis in the Middle East? 1422 01:25:22,893 --> 01:25:24,645 I was sayin' just this morning at the weekly 1423 01:25:24,728 --> 01:25:26,446 prayer breakfast in this historic capitol 1424 01:25:27,189 --> 01:25:29,191 that it behooves both the Jews and the Arabs 1425 01:25:29,608 --> 01:25:31,702 to settle their differences in a Christian manner. 1426 01:25:31,944 --> 01:25:33,912 But... Governor! Governor... 1427 01:25:33,987 --> 01:25:35,955 Have you seen the evidence of the disgraceful situation 1428 01:25:36,031 --> 01:25:37,874 at the Chicken Ranch? 1429 01:25:40,702 --> 01:25:45,378 ♪ Fellow Texans, I am proudly 1430 01:25:45,457 --> 01:25:50,429 ♪ Standing here to humbly say 1431 01:25:50,587 --> 01:25:52,134 ♪ I assure you 1432 01:25:53,048 --> 01:25:54,721 ♪ And I mean it 1433 01:25:55,384 --> 01:26:00,686 ♪ Now, who says I don't speak out as plain as day 1434 01:26:00,764 --> 01:26:02,482 ♪ And fellow Texans, 1435 01:26:03,100 --> 01:26:06,695 ♪ I'm for progress And the flag 1436 01:26:06,770 --> 01:26:10,320 ♪ Long may it fly 1437 01:26:11,149 --> 01:26:12,776 ♪ I'm a poor boy 1438 01:26:13,277 --> 01:26:15,029 ♪ Come to greatness 1439 01:26:17,030 --> 01:26:20,534 ♪ So it follows that I cannot tell a lie 1440 01:26:21,994 --> 01:26:23,416 What the hell did he say? 1441 01:26:23,495 --> 01:26:25,839 The same as usual. Not a damn thing. 1442 01:26:30,502 --> 01:26:34,132 ♪ I love to dance a little sidestep 1443 01:26:34,214 --> 01:26:36,262 ♪ Now they see me Now they don't 1444 01:26:36,341 --> 01:26:37,888 ♪ I've come and gone 1445 01:26:37,968 --> 01:26:41,814 ♪ And I love to sweep around the wide step 1446 01:26:41,888 --> 01:26:45,017 ♪ Cut a little swath and lead the people on 1447 01:26:49,313 --> 01:26:50,781 Governor! - Yeah. 1448 01:26:50,856 --> 01:26:52,403 Jerry Rogers of the Houston Post. 1449 01:26:52,482 --> 01:26:53,699 Hi, Jerry. 1450 01:26:53,942 --> 01:26:56,786 Governor, do you plan to take action against the Chicken Ranch? 1451 01:26:58,196 --> 01:27:00,039 ♪ Now, my good friends 1452 01:27:00,198 --> 01:27:02,041 ♪ It behooves me 1453 01:27:02,117 --> 01:27:05,838 ♪ To be solemn and declare 1454 01:27:05,912 --> 01:27:09,257 ♪ I'm for goodness and for profit 1455 01:27:09,791 --> 01:27:13,136 ♪ And for living clean and saying daily prayer 1456 01:27:13,211 --> 01:27:17,216 ♪ And now, my good friends You can sleep nights 1457 01:27:17,549 --> 01:27:21,019 ♪ I'll continue to stand tall 1458 01:27:21,094 --> 01:27:22,892 ♪ You can trust me 1459 01:27:22,971 --> 01:27:24,689 ♪ For I promise 1460 01:27:24,806 --> 01:27:29,232 ♪ I shall keep a watchful eye upon y'all 1461 01:27:32,522 --> 01:27:33,774 Did you get any of that? 1462 01:27:33,857 --> 01:27:35,700 I hear him talking but he don't come in. 1463 01:27:37,069 --> 01:27:40,824 ♪ I love to dance a little sidestep 1464 01:27:40,906 --> 01:27:42,499 ♪ Now they see me Now they don't 1465 01:27:42,574 --> 01:27:44,576 ♪ I've come and gone 1466 01:27:44,701 --> 01:27:48,001 ♪ And I love to sweep around the wide step 1467 01:27:48,080 --> 01:27:51,630 ♪ Cut a little swath and lead the people on 1468 01:27:52,918 --> 01:27:54,545 There he is. Come on, boys. 1469 01:27:54,628 --> 01:27:56,471 Governor! Governor. 1470 01:27:56,546 --> 01:27:58,844 Melvin P. Thorpe. Watchdog News. 1471 01:27:59,257 --> 01:28:02,431 Why has the Chicken Ranch operation been so long ignored? 1472 01:28:02,511 --> 01:28:04,551 We seem to be havin' some acoustic problems in here. 1473 01:28:04,596 --> 01:28:07,349 Aren't you afraid of possible pay-offs and bribes? 1474 01:28:07,432 --> 01:28:09,355 Melvin, I'm sorry. 1475 01:28:09,518 --> 01:28:10,940 Enough of this pussyfootin', Governor. 1476 01:28:11,019 --> 01:28:14,614 What do you intend to do about Miss Mona and the Chicken Ranch? 1477 01:28:25,867 --> 01:28:28,336 ♪ Now, Miss Mona 1478 01:28:28,620 --> 01:28:30,293 ♪ I don't know her 1479 01:28:30,580 --> 01:28:33,754 ♪ Though I've heard the name 1480 01:28:33,959 --> 01:28:35,256 ♪ Yes 1481 01:28:35,836 --> 01:28:37,713 ♪ But of course I have 1482 01:28:38,088 --> 01:28:39,965 ♪ No close contact 1483 01:28:40,424 --> 01:28:45,100 ♪ So what she is doin' I can only guess 1484 01:28:45,178 --> 01:28:47,476 ♪ And now Miss Mona 1485 01:28:47,764 --> 01:28:49,516 ♪ She's a blemish 1486 01:28:50,016 --> 01:28:54,362 ♪ On the face of that good town 1487 01:28:57,482 --> 01:29:00,656 ♪ I am takin' certain steps here 1488 01:29:00,736 --> 01:29:05,333 ♪ Someone somewhere 's gonna have to close her down 1489 01:29:08,243 --> 01:29:10,086 Can you believe that man? 1490 01:29:10,162 --> 01:29:11,914 Was that a yes or a no? 1491 01:29:11,997 --> 01:29:13,624 That's a possible maybe. 1492 01:29:14,916 --> 01:29:18,090 ♪ I love to dance a little sidestep 1493 01:29:18,670 --> 01:29:20,263 ♪ Now they see me Now they don't 1494 01:29:20,338 --> 01:29:22,136 ♪ I've come and gone 1495 01:29:22,507 --> 01:29:26,262 ♪ And I love to sweep around the wide step 1496 01:29:26,344 --> 01:29:29,439 ♪ Cut a little swath and lead the people on 1497 01:29:30,098 --> 01:29:33,602 ♪ I love to dance a little sidestep 1498 01:29:37,647 --> 01:29:41,447 ♪ I love to sweep around the wide step 1499 01:29:49,034 --> 01:29:52,789 ♪ Cut a little swath and lead the people 1500 01:29:52,871 --> 01:29:54,999 ♪ On 1501 01:30:01,463 --> 01:30:03,841 Governor? I have Sheriff Dodd from Gilbert 1502 01:30:03,924 --> 01:30:05,597 waiting outside to see you. 1503 01:30:05,675 --> 01:30:09,054 He's been here since early this morning and is very insistent. 1504 01:30:09,554 --> 01:30:11,522 Swearin' Sheriff Dodd? The one on TV? 1505 01:30:12,057 --> 01:30:15,231 No... Hi, Sheriff! 1506 01:30:16,102 --> 01:30:18,150 Just talkin' about you. How are ya? 1507 01:30:18,647 --> 01:30:22,117 Governor. I know I'm way out of line comin' up here like this, 1508 01:30:22,359 --> 01:30:23,827 but before you closed down the Chicken Ranch, 1509 01:30:23,902 --> 01:30:24,903 I wanted you to know all the facts. 1510 01:30:24,945 --> 01:30:26,868 But I haven't made that decision yet! Good. 1511 01:30:26,947 --> 01:30:28,039 My aides are still workin' on that. 1512 01:30:28,114 --> 01:30:29,957 Well, the Chicken... 1513 01:30:30,033 --> 01:30:32,752 The Chicken Ranch has been in my county since before I was born. 1514 01:30:33,078 --> 01:30:37,424 Its doors have been open to soldiers and presidents and farmers. 1515 01:30:38,250 --> 01:30:41,345 Even governors who can remember what a great institution it is. 1516 01:30:43,213 --> 01:30:44,635 No need to bring that up, Sheriff. 1517 01:30:44,714 --> 01:30:45,715 I ain't threatenin' you, Governor. 1518 01:30:45,799 --> 01:30:47,221 Whatever you say, I'm gonna do. 1519 01:30:47,300 --> 01:30:48,722 But think of the people out there. 1520 01:30:48,844 --> 01:30:50,517 I've known Miss Mona for 12 years. 1521 01:30:50,595 --> 01:30:52,222 You're never gonna meet a finer woman. 1522 01:30:52,305 --> 01:30:55,104 She never refuses a charity. The whole town likes her. 1523 01:30:55,642 --> 01:30:59,567 Hospital fund, new swimmin' pool, even the Little Leaguers. 1524 01:30:59,646 --> 01:31:02,486 She bought 'em uniforms so they wouldn't have to play in their overalls. 1525 01:31:03,191 --> 01:31:04,283 Well. 1526 01:31:06,361 --> 01:31:09,706 I wasn't aware of her civic generosity. 1527 01:31:11,741 --> 01:31:12,867 But the law is the law! 1528 01:31:12,951 --> 01:31:14,453 Sometimes it's gotta be changed. 1529 01:31:14,786 --> 01:31:16,288 I been fightin' crime all my life, 1530 01:31:16,371 --> 01:31:18,465 but let's not confuse crime with committin' a sin. 1531 01:31:18,790 --> 01:31:20,463 You can't legislate morality. 1532 01:31:20,542 --> 01:31:23,091 Those girls out there have never caused any trouble to anybody. 1533 01:31:23,169 --> 01:31:26,264 They're healthy, taxpayin', law-abidin' citizens 1534 01:31:26,339 --> 01:31:27,761 who supply a demand and provide 1535 01:31:27,841 --> 01:31:29,343 an economic asset to the community. 1536 01:31:30,343 --> 01:31:32,766 Ed Earl. 1537 01:31:33,555 --> 01:31:38,026 You ever think about runnin' for office? I swear. 1538 01:31:38,143 --> 01:31:40,145 You make that whorehouse sound like 1539 01:31:40,228 --> 01:31:41,730 a damn nonprofit recreational facility. 1540 01:31:42,939 --> 01:31:45,943 Governor, if the citizens who elected me 1541 01:31:46,026 --> 01:31:48,074 found it necessary for me to close it down, 1542 01:31:48,153 --> 01:31:49,826 I would close it down. 1543 01:31:49,905 --> 01:31:54,251 If Miss Mona and the girls that work for her were jeopardizin' the health, 1544 01:31:54,326 --> 01:31:57,580 wealth or moral scruples of the community, I would close it down. 1545 01:31:57,996 --> 01:31:59,998 If the place was just a piddlin' nuisance, 1546 01:32:00,332 --> 01:32:03,427 an eyesore, a fire hazard, I would close it down! 1547 01:32:03,501 --> 01:32:04,501 But there's nothin'. 1548 01:32:04,544 --> 01:32:07,297 No reason except the goddam cries 1549 01:32:07,380 --> 01:32:10,133 of a muckrakin' sensationalist on television. 1550 01:32:10,926 --> 01:32:13,179 Here they are, Governor. What you've been waitin' for. 1551 01:32:16,348 --> 01:32:18,316 Aha. I'm sorry, Ed Earl. 1552 01:32:18,391 --> 01:32:21,895 But the Chicken Ranch loses, 42 to 37, with 21% undecided. 1553 01:32:22,312 --> 01:32:23,438 What is that? 1554 01:32:23,521 --> 01:32:25,944 The polls. You can't expect me to go against the polls. 1555 01:32:26,024 --> 01:32:27,116 This is what the people want. 1556 01:32:27,192 --> 01:32:29,320 Melvin still outside? Maybe I can catch the television cameras 1557 01:32:29,402 --> 01:32:31,279 before they leave. Good seein' ya. 1558 01:32:31,571 --> 01:32:32,993 But it's not what my people want. 1559 01:32:34,366 --> 01:32:36,869 Show's over, Sheriff. Close it down! 1560 01:32:51,383 --> 01:32:54,683 ♪ Melvin Thorpe has done it once again 1561 01:32:55,053 --> 01:32:58,557 ♪ He's shone his light and now we see 1562 01:32:59,015 --> 01:33:02,394 ♪ Melvin Thorpe will go through thick and thin 1563 01:33:02,477 --> 01:33:05,481 ♪ And lead us on to victory 1564 01:33:06,815 --> 01:33:10,194 ♪ I love to dance a little sidestep 1565 01:33:10,402 --> 01:33:11,949 ♪ Now they see me Now they don't 1566 01:33:12,028 --> 01:33:13,996 ♪ I've come and gone 1567 01:33:14,239 --> 01:33:17,960 ♪ And I love to sweep around the wide step 1568 01:33:18,034 --> 01:33:21,254 ♪ Cut a little swath and lead the people on 1569 01:33:21,913 --> 01:33:25,133 ♪ Melvin Thorpe has done it once again 1570 01:33:25,417 --> 01:33:27,966 ♪ He's shone his light and now we see 1571 01:33:29,254 --> 01:33:32,929 ♪ Melvin Thorpe will go through thick and thin 1572 01:33:33,008 --> 01:33:35,887 ♪ And lead us on to victory 1573 01:33:37,846 --> 01:33:41,350 ♪ Melvin Thorpe has done it once again 1574 01:33:41,433 --> 01:33:44,528 ♪ He's shone his light and now we see 1575 01:33:44,602 --> 01:33:48,106 I'd love to see that sheriff's face right now! 1576 01:33:49,399 --> 01:33:52,653 That Chicken Ranch is gonna get it in the neck! 1577 01:33:53,403 --> 01:33:56,407 And Miss Mona, she's gonna get hers, too. 1578 01:33:57,615 --> 01:33:59,083 I' For all to see 1579 01:34:00,660 --> 01:34:05,040 ♪ Melvin Thorpe will go through thick and thin He'll lead us all to 1580 01:34:05,123 --> 01:34:09,594 ♪ Victory 1581 01:34:13,923 --> 01:34:15,470 Sorry son of a bitch. 1582 01:34:50,752 --> 01:34:51,924 Hello? 1583 01:34:53,171 --> 01:34:55,048 Mona, this is an official call. 1584 01:34:56,341 --> 01:34:58,014 As the Sheriff of Lanville County, 1585 01:34:58,093 --> 01:34:59,265 it's my duty to tell you that... 1586 01:34:59,344 --> 01:35:01,847 Why don't you just get to the point, Sheriff? 1587 01:35:03,640 --> 01:35:04,983 I gotta close you down. 1588 01:35:06,017 --> 01:35:07,189 I see. 1589 01:35:08,728 --> 01:35:10,526 How long do we have? 1590 01:35:11,022 --> 01:35:13,491 Be better to do it as soon as possible. 1591 01:35:15,652 --> 01:35:17,120 I understand. 1592 01:35:18,154 --> 01:35:19,246 Mona. 1593 01:35:20,990 --> 01:35:22,867 About the other night. 1594 01:35:24,869 --> 01:35:26,542 I lost my temper. 1595 01:35:28,540 --> 01:35:30,338 I said some things I shouldn't have said. 1596 01:35:32,418 --> 01:35:34,216 I want to apologize. 1597 01:35:35,088 --> 01:35:36,965 It's all right, Ed Earl. 1598 01:35:37,048 --> 01:35:40,518 I think we both said a whole lot of things we regret. 1599 01:35:40,927 --> 01:35:42,474 If there's ever anything I can do... 1600 01:35:42,846 --> 01:35:45,349 No, thank you. I think you've done all you could. 1601 01:35:46,266 --> 01:35:48,234 I have to tell my girls. 1602 01:36:22,594 --> 01:36:25,097 Well, the news has come. 1603 01:36:25,638 --> 01:36:27,185 Just got a call from the Sheriff, 1604 01:36:27,891 --> 01:36:29,768 and we are closed down. 1605 01:36:30,268 --> 01:36:32,396 Immediately and permanently. 1606 01:36:36,107 --> 01:36:37,529 What'll we do? 1607 01:36:37,609 --> 01:36:40,783 Well, Las Vegas, here I come. 1608 01:36:41,404 --> 01:36:43,372 Damn! I thought when the Sheriff went 1609 01:36:43,448 --> 01:36:45,246 up to Austin to speak to the Governor, 1610 01:36:45,325 --> 01:36:47,043 we'd get a reprieve. 1611 01:36:47,118 --> 01:36:48,335 What did you say? 1612 01:36:48,870 --> 01:36:50,417 Didn't you know about that, Miss Mona? 1613 01:36:51,331 --> 01:36:52,799 He drove up last night. 1614 01:36:53,416 --> 01:36:56,340 The whole town's talkin' about the way he fought for you. 1615 01:36:57,295 --> 01:36:59,263 Didn't he tell you that? 1616 01:36:59,547 --> 01:37:02,141 No. No, he didn't. 1617 01:37:32,205 --> 01:37:36,301 ♪ Hey, maybe I'll dye my hair 1618 01:37:38,253 --> 01:37:40,802 ♪ Maybe I'll move somewhere 1619 01:37:40,880 --> 01:37:43,008 ♪ Maybe I'll get a car 1620 01:37:43,132 --> 01:37:48,514 ♪ Maybe I'll drive so far they'll all lose track 1621 01:37:48,846 --> 01:37:52,896 ♪ Me, I'll bounce right back 1622 01:37:53,184 --> 01:37:55,312 ♪ Maybe I'll sleep real late 1623 01:37:58,022 --> 01:38:00,366 ♪ Maybe I'll lose some weight 1624 01:38:00,441 --> 01:38:02,739 ♪ Maybe I'll clear my junk 1625 01:38:02,819 --> 01:38:08,417 ♪ Maybe I'll just get drunk on apple wine 1626 01:38:08,533 --> 01:38:14,540 ♪ Me, I'll be just fine and dandy 1627 01:38:14,664 --> 01:38:19,261 ♪ Lord, it's like a hard candy Christmas 1628 01:38:19,377 --> 01:38:22,301 ♪ I'm barely getting through 1629 01:38:22,380 --> 01:38:23,882 ♪ Tomorrow 1630 01:38:24,048 --> 01:38:25,971 ♪ But still I won't let 1631 01:38:26,050 --> 01:38:29,020 ♪ Sorrow bring me way down 1632 01:38:29,095 --> 01:38:33,692 ♪ I'll be fine and dandy 1633 01:38:33,766 --> 01:38:38,488 ♪ Lord, it's like a hard candy Christmas 1634 01:38:38,563 --> 01:38:41,817 ♪ I'm barely gettin' through 1635 01:38:41,899 --> 01:38:43,196 ♪ Tomorrow 1636 01:38:43,276 --> 01:38:48,407 ♪ But still I won't let sorrow bring me way down 1637 01:38:52,076 --> 01:38:56,752 ♪ Hey, maybe I'll learn to sew 1638 01:38:57,373 --> 01:39:01,094 ♪ Hey, maybe I'll just lie low 1639 01:39:01,169 --> 01:39:03,263 ♪ Maybe I'll hit the bars 1640 01:39:03,338 --> 01:39:08,515 ♪ Maybe I'll count the stars until the dawn 1641 01:39:08,593 --> 01:39:13,064 ♪ Me, I will go on 1642 01:39:13,139 --> 01:39:16,359 ♪ Maybe I'll settle down 1643 01:39:17,935 --> 01:39:20,233 ♪ Maybe I'll just leave town 1644 01:39:20,313 --> 01:39:22,532 ♪ Maybe I'll have some fun 1645 01:39:22,607 --> 01:39:28,114 ♪ Maybe I'll meet someone and make him mine 1646 01:39:28,196 --> 01:39:32,702 ♪ Me, I'll be just fine 1647 01:39:32,784 --> 01:39:34,206 ♪ And dandy 1648 01:39:34,285 --> 01:39:38,506 ♪ Lord, it's like a hard candy Christmas 1649 01:39:38,581 --> 01:39:43,462 ♪ I'm barely gettin ' through tomorrow 1650 01:39:43,544 --> 01:39:48,391 ♪ But still I won't let sorrow bring me way down 1651 01:39:48,466 --> 01:39:52,892 ♪ I'll be fine and dandy 1652 01:39:53,012 --> 01:39:57,609 ♪ Lord, it's like a hard candy Christmas 1653 01:39:57,683 --> 01:40:02,405 ♪ I'm barely gettin ' through tomorrow 1654 01:40:02,480 --> 01:40:04,232 ♪ But still I won't let 1655 01:40:04,315 --> 01:40:07,364 ♪ Sorrow bring me way down 1656 01:40:09,737 --> 01:40:14,163 ♪ I'll be fine and dandy 1657 01:40:14,325 --> 01:40:18,922 ♪ Lord, it's like a hard candy Christmas 1658 01:40:18,996 --> 01:40:23,627 ♪ I'm barely gettin ' through tomorrow 1659 01:40:23,709 --> 01:40:25,586 ♪ But still I won't let 1660 01:40:25,670 --> 01:40:29,015 ♪ Sorrow bring me way down 1661 01:40:50,027 --> 01:40:54,783 ♪ I'll be fine 1662 01:40:55,032 --> 01:40:56,625 ♪ I'll be fine 1663 01:40:59,787 --> 01:41:03,883 ♪ I'll be fine 1664 01:41:19,640 --> 01:41:21,483 So the girls left 1665 01:41:21,559 --> 01:41:24,233 and it was a sorry day for Lanville County. 1666 01:41:27,398 --> 01:41:28,900 It's kinda like the end of an era. 1667 01:41:29,817 --> 01:41:31,911 You know, like when you graduate from high school? 1668 01:41:32,987 --> 01:41:35,410 Things are just never the same again. 1669 01:41:37,116 --> 01:41:39,869 Ed Earl's up in the state legislature now, 1670 01:41:40,578 --> 01:41:42,580 and I became the Sheriff. 1671 01:41:50,004 --> 01:41:52,124 I suppose you're wonderin' what happened to Miss Mona. 1672 01:41:52,507 --> 01:41:55,807 Well, Ed Earl drove up there on her last day. 1673 01:42:12,151 --> 01:42:13,528 Hey, Sheriff. 1674 01:42:13,611 --> 01:42:14,783 Good morning, Jewel. 1675 01:42:14,862 --> 01:42:18,457 I'm so pleased to see ya. I knew you couldn't let me leave 1676 01:42:18,533 --> 01:42:21,161 without a sweet goodbye for your old Porky. 1677 01:42:24,080 --> 01:42:25,297 Goodbye, Jewel. 1678 01:42:25,373 --> 01:42:26,465 Goodbye, Sheriff. 1679 01:42:26,541 --> 01:42:29,044 I sure hope you come up north to visit Miss Mona and me. 1680 01:42:29,794 --> 01:42:31,046 Where is she? 1681 01:42:31,128 --> 01:42:32,345 Inside. 1682 01:42:34,215 --> 01:42:35,842 See you're takin' the old juke with you. 1683 01:42:36,008 --> 01:42:40,058 You know I couldn't leave without my bell and my box. 1684 01:43:24,348 --> 01:43:25,600 Ed Earl? 1685 01:43:28,853 --> 01:43:30,651 This old place looks kinda funny, don't it? 1686 01:43:31,897 --> 01:43:34,446 Ben Sawtuck bought all my furniture and fixtures 1687 01:43:34,525 --> 01:43:36,994 and Langston downtown is gonna sell the rest. 1688 01:43:42,158 --> 01:43:43,758 Mona, there's something I wanna tell you. 1689 01:43:44,035 --> 01:43:45,708 I want you to thank your boys for me. 1690 01:43:46,037 --> 01:43:47,380 Those sightseers and reporters would have 1691 01:43:47,455 --> 01:43:48,752 got all out of hand if it hadn't been 1692 01:43:48,831 --> 01:43:50,458 for your deputies down at the gate. 1693 01:43:52,752 --> 01:43:54,174 Mona, you know me better than that. 1694 01:43:54,253 --> 01:43:56,013 Ed Earl, I believe the thing for you to do is 1695 01:43:56,047 --> 01:43:57,765 just to put this whole thing behind you 1696 01:43:57,840 --> 01:43:59,842 just as quick as you can. 1697 01:43:59,925 --> 01:44:03,304 I've made a little money, I've laughed some, I've danced to the music. 1698 01:44:03,387 --> 01:44:05,481 It's just time to pay the fiddler, that's all. 1699 01:44:09,060 --> 01:44:10,687 Mona, we've been together a long time. 1700 01:44:12,229 --> 01:44:14,527 Sometimes I think you know me better than I know myself. 1701 01:44:17,193 --> 01:44:18,991 So you know how hard this is for me to say. 1702 01:44:21,572 --> 01:44:22,915 I love you. 1703 01:44:25,743 --> 01:44:27,416 Will you marry me? 1704 01:44:27,828 --> 01:44:31,503 Ed Earl, I've loved you since I was 16-years-old. 1705 01:44:32,041 --> 01:44:34,590 But I've thought about this for a long time. 1706 01:44:35,002 --> 01:44:36,720 And as much as I'd love for it to work, 1707 01:44:37,463 --> 01:44:40,262 I know deep down in my heart it ain't never gonna be. 1708 01:44:40,966 --> 01:44:42,684 Didn't you hear what I said? 1709 01:44:42,927 --> 01:44:44,019 I did, darlin'. 1710 01:44:44,095 --> 01:44:46,598 But it's gonna always be just like it is. 1711 01:44:47,390 --> 01:44:50,143 There just ain't no way in this world it can work. 1712 01:44:50,976 --> 01:44:52,853 We could make it work. 1713 01:44:53,104 --> 01:44:54,606 Just have to give it a chance. 1714 01:44:56,107 --> 01:44:57,279 ♪ If I 1715 01:44:59,193 --> 01:45:01,366 ♪ Should stay 1716 01:45:02,488 --> 01:45:05,082 ♪ Well, I would only 1717 01:45:05,157 --> 01:45:08,286 ♪ Be in your way 1718 01:45:09,704 --> 01:45:12,503 ♪ And so I'll go 1719 01:45:13,374 --> 01:45:17,004 ♪ And yet, I know 1720 01:45:17,086 --> 01:45:19,054 ♪ That I'll think of you 1721 01:45:19,505 --> 01:45:22,725 ♪ Each step of the way 1722 01:45:24,969 --> 01:45:28,223 ♪ And I 1723 01:45:28,514 --> 01:45:32,018 ♪ Will always 1724 01:45:32,101 --> 01:45:35,275 ♪ Love you 1725 01:45:35,646 --> 01:45:38,946 ♪ I will always 1726 01:45:39,024 --> 01:45:42,574 ♪ Love you 1727 01:45:45,906 --> 01:45:48,250 ♪ Bittersweet 1728 01:45:49,452 --> 01:45:51,250 ♪ Memories 1729 01:45:53,497 --> 01:45:58,674 ♪ I guess that's all I'll be takin' with me 1730 01:46:01,046 --> 01:46:03,048 ♪ Good-bye 1731 01:46:03,382 --> 01:46:06,181 ♪ Please, don't cry 1732 01:46:06,886 --> 01:46:13,815 ♪ 'Cause we both know that I'm not what you need 1733 01:46:15,019 --> 01:46:18,273 ♪ But I 1734 01:46:18,355 --> 01:46:21,359 ♪ Will always 1735 01:46:21,442 --> 01:46:24,867 ♪ Love you 1736 01:46:25,029 --> 01:46:28,624 ♪ I will always 1737 01:46:28,699 --> 01:46:32,749 ♪ Love you 1738 01:46:38,667 --> 01:46:40,340 I know you're gonna get your dream. 1739 01:46:41,962 --> 01:46:45,341 And I know you're gonna do a real good job in the legislature. 1740 01:46:46,967 --> 01:46:48,514 But if you was to marry me... 1741 01:46:48,594 --> 01:46:49,937 Wait, a second. 1742 01:46:51,013 --> 01:46:52,390 I love you. 1743 01:46:53,766 --> 01:46:55,894 I don't give a damn what people say. 1744 01:47:01,398 --> 01:47:03,696 Jewel! Hold it right there! 1745 01:47:03,776 --> 01:47:06,074 What's that, Sheriff? 1746 01:47:08,697 --> 01:47:10,540 Which one of them bags is hers? 1747 01:47:10,616 --> 01:47:11,913 That one. 1748 01:47:12,409 --> 01:47:15,253 And that one there, there 1749 01:47:23,045 --> 01:47:25,218 Oh, Sheriff! 1750 01:47:27,466 --> 01:47:31,937 I always knew you'd come through! 1751 01:48:44,835 --> 01:48:48,385 Well, that's pretty darn close to the way it happened. 1752 01:48:48,672 --> 01:48:52,973 The old Watchdog, Melvin P. Thorpe, got what he wanted. 1753 01:48:53,844 --> 01:48:56,097 Miss Mona married Ed Earl 1754 01:48:56,180 --> 01:48:58,182 and they got what they wanted. 1755 01:48:58,265 --> 01:49:02,691 And the people of Texas, well, they got what they wanted. 1756 01:49:02,770 --> 01:49:07,150 Another legend, the legend of the Chicken Ranch. 1757 01:49:08,150 --> 01:49:11,324 ♪ It's just a little bitty pissant country place 1758 01:49:11,403 --> 01:49:13,201 ♪ Nothin' much to see 1759 01:49:13,405 --> 01:49:16,124 ♪ No drinkin' allowed We get a nice quiet crowd 1760 01:49:16,200 --> 01:49:17,793 ♪ Plain as it can be 1761 01:49:17,868 --> 01:49:20,838 ♪ It's just a piddly, squattin' old-time country place 1762 01:49:20,913 --> 01:49:22,915 ♪ Nothin' too high-toned 1763 01:49:22,998 --> 01:49:25,296 ♪ Just lots of goodwill and maybe one small thrill 1764 01:49:25,376 --> 01:49:27,970 ♪ But there's nothin' dirty goin' on 1765 01:49:28,045 --> 01:49:30,298 ♪ It's just a little bitty pissant country place 1766 01:49:30,381 --> 01:49:32,224 ♪ Nothin' much to see 1767 01:49:32,424 --> 01:49:35,143 ♪ No drinkin' allowed We get a nice quiet crowd 1768 01:49:35,219 --> 01:49:36,892 ♪ Plain as it can be 1769 01:49:36,971 --> 01:49:39,815 ♪ It's just a piddly, squattin' old-time country place 1770 01:49:39,890 --> 01:49:41,892 ♪ Nothin' too high-toned 1771 01:49:42,017 --> 01:49:49,028 ♪ Just lots of goodwill and maybe one small thrill 1772 01:49:49,108 --> 01:49:50,735 ♪ But there's nothin' dirty goin' on 1773 01:49:53,529 --> 01:49:55,782 ♪ Nothin' dirty goin' on 1774 01:49:56,532 --> 01:49:58,580 Y'all come back now, ya hear?136445

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