Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,296 --> 00:00:10,343
!!!Greetings!!!
Encoded By Narko And Uploaded By XpoZ
https://xpoztorrent.wordpress.com
2
00:00:36,426 --> 00:00:38,411
[Chinon City Hall]
3
00:00:38,521 --> 00:00:42,816
M. Rachid Abdoul Mohamed Benassem,
4
00:00:42,845 --> 00:00:50,833
Do you take Mlle Isabelle Susanne
Marie Verneuil to be you wife?
5
00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:55,512
- I do.
- Mlle Isabelle Susanne Marie Verneuil,
6
00:00:55,598 --> 00:01:02,441
do you take M. Rachid Abdoul Mohamed
Benassem, to be your husband?
7
00:01:02,586 --> 00:01:04,176
I do.
8
00:01:04,277 --> 00:01:09,215
In the name of the law
I declare you united in wedlock.
9
00:01:15,008 --> 00:01:16,669
ONE YEAR LATER
10
00:01:16,741 --> 00:01:19,263
AGAIN at Chinon City Hall
11
00:01:19,288 --> 00:01:22,716
Mlle Odile Huguette Marie Verneuil,
12
00:01:22,770 --> 00:01:29,858
Do you take M. David Maurice Isaac
Bénichou to be your husband?
13
00:01:30,198 --> 00:01:31,396
I do.
14
00:01:31,421 --> 00:01:35,679
In the name of the law
I declare you united in wedlock.
15
00:01:42,440 --> 00:01:44,182
ONE YEAR LATER
16
00:01:44,207 --> 00:01:46,268
STILL at Chinon City Hall☻
17
00:01:46,471 --> 00:01:50,552
Mlle Ségolène Chantal Marie Verneuil,
18
00:01:50,693 --> 00:01:57,083
Do you take Mr. Chao Pierre
Paul Ling to be your husband?
19
00:01:57,286 --> 00:01:58,638
I do.
20
00:01:58,902 --> 00:02:03,302
In the name of the law
I declare you united in wedlock.
21
00:02:05,810 --> 00:02:07,499
Everybody smile!
22
00:02:08,087 --> 00:02:10,592
I see two who aren't smiling!
23
00:02:14,165 --> 00:02:16,312
Perfect. Don't move!
24
00:02:19,164 --> 00:02:20,116
WHAT
.
.
25
00:02:20,141 --> 00:02:20,850
WHAT
DID WE DO
.
26
00:02:20,875 --> 00:02:22,827
WHAT
DID WE DO
TO GOD?
27
00:02:22,898 --> 00:02:25,575
[Serial (bad) weddings]
28
00:02:26,170 --> 00:02:28,958
Paris, six months later...
29
00:02:29,002 --> 00:02:30,974
- Damn, it'll be butchery!
- No!
30
00:02:31,090 --> 00:02:33,771
Odile assured me, they got
the best Rabbi.
31
00:02:33,816 --> 00:02:37,122
All I know is, he's gonna cut
my grandson's weenie!
32
00:02:37,147 --> 00:02:39,462
Please, Claude, make an effort!
33
00:02:39,502 --> 00:02:42,982
You think I like it?
I'd rather be in Chinon.
34
00:02:43,099 --> 00:02:45,240
Ah, these doors are heavy!
35
00:02:45,498 --> 00:02:47,358
I'm not sure I can stand it!
36
00:02:47,404 --> 00:02:51,982
On TV, I saw a frightful report
on cliterectomy in Mali and I...
37
00:02:52,628 --> 00:02:54,348
- Hello everybody.
- Yoo-hoo!
38
00:02:54,410 --> 00:02:57,043
Hello Marie, hello Claude.
Had a good trip?
39
00:02:57,082 --> 00:02:58,544
Very good, thanks.
40
00:03:01,693 --> 00:03:03,646
I look like a tank truck!
41
00:03:03,716 --> 00:03:06,585
- No you're ravishing.
- You're sublime!
42
00:03:06,794 --> 00:03:10,776
- Did you choose a name?
- No we haven't decided yet.
43
00:03:10,824 --> 00:03:13,753
We're hesitating between
Antoine, Lucas or...
44
00:03:13,792 --> 00:03:15,026
Mahmoud.
45
00:03:17,084 --> 00:03:18,665
Mahmoud?
46
00:03:19,915 --> 00:03:23,038
Yeah I like Mahmoud.
Which do you prefer?
47
00:03:23,287 --> 00:03:25,288
I-I, I like all three. But, er...
48
00:03:25,327 --> 00:03:28,687
I-I, I have a small preference
for Lucas and Antoine.
49
00:03:28,718 --> 00:03:32,298
Yeah, Mahmoud is not
an easy name to bear.
50
00:03:32,784 --> 00:03:35,231
It sounds like mammoth, no?
51
00:03:39,791 --> 00:03:41,675
Looks fancy, huh?
52
00:03:43,123 --> 00:03:44,076
Shalom.
53
00:03:44,107 --> 00:03:46,986
- You're such a ass!
- I thought he'd have a fit!
54
00:03:47,041 --> 00:03:50,244
I swear, on my son's head,
I haven't converted to Judaism!
55
00:03:50,283 --> 00:03:52,948
- I sure hope not!
- Why not baptize him?
56
00:03:52,973 --> 00:03:55,624
Benjamin may like to
be Catholic later.
57
00:03:55,679 --> 00:03:57,429
Mama, for the 100th time,
58
00:03:57,468 --> 00:03:59,943
circumcision doesn't
makes him a Jew.
59
00:03:59,968 --> 00:04:02,546
And it's hygienic!
Helps to avoid infections.
60
00:04:02,593 --> 00:04:05,013
Mine's intact and
I'm VERY healthy!
61
00:04:05,052 --> 00:04:06,348
Claude please!
62
00:04:06,403 --> 00:04:08,841
Hello mama-and-papa-in-law!
63
00:04:08,874 --> 00:04:10,020
Ah... Good luck.
64
00:04:10,100 --> 00:04:13,615
Chao, I told you, don't call me papa
it gets on my nerves.
65
00:04:13,661 --> 00:04:16,255
- Sorry I won't do it again.
- Hello honey.
66
00:04:16,286 --> 00:04:17,931
- Hello Marie.
- Hello Chao.
67
00:04:17,956 --> 00:04:20,564
- When do you go back to Chinon?
- Tomorrow night.
68
00:04:20,589 --> 00:04:23,383
Oh, super! Let's have a big
family lunch, tomorrow!
69
00:04:23,408 --> 00:04:26,115
Great idea! I'll cook a
specialty from my country.
70
00:04:26,157 --> 00:04:28,426
Steam dog-meat Dim Sum!
71
00:04:31,091 --> 00:04:32,943
I was joking, huh?
72
00:04:33,056 --> 00:04:34,532
It's starting!
73
00:04:34,595 --> 00:04:37,365
- The circumcision!
- No need to rush it.
74
00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:39,616
Why trade barbs with dad?
75
00:04:39,655 --> 00:04:42,857
Dunno what came over me.
And with a Thai accent, too!
76
00:04:42,980 --> 00:04:44,349
Ah ok...
77
00:04:44,522 --> 00:04:48,389
♪ Eliahu, Eliahu
78
00:04:48,662 --> 00:04:52,780
♪ Eliahu hagiladi
79
00:04:54,021 --> 00:04:57,215
Baruch atah Adonai elohaynu
melech ha'olam asher
80
00:04:57,240 --> 00:05:00,802
kidshanu bemitzvotav
vetzivanu ana milah.
81
00:05:00,891 --> 00:05:02,109
Amein!
82
00:05:03,867 --> 00:05:06,777
Poor little baby! Frightful!
83
00:05:08,185 --> 00:05:14,169
♪ ... he'elanu.
84
00:05:16,551 --> 00:05:19,580
Odd taste...
This champagne must be kosher.
85
00:05:19,626 --> 00:05:22,306
This infernal thing's itchy!
86
00:05:22,361 --> 00:05:25,814
Finish your glass I want
to shower in the hotel!
87
00:05:28,583 --> 00:05:30,605
Claude, Marie!
88
00:05:31,007 --> 00:05:33,005
Here, this is for you.
89
00:05:33,060 --> 00:05:36,630
- Thanks David, what is it?
- Benjamin's foreskin!
90
00:05:37,107 --> 00:05:40,021
- Ah, well...
- It's a great honor.
91
00:05:40,177 --> 00:05:42,917
I imagine it is.
What do we do with it?
92
00:05:42,995 --> 00:05:46,495
Tradition says to bury the
foreskin in the family garden.
93
00:05:46,550 --> 00:05:49,849
We have no garden, I thought
you might bury it in yours.
94
00:05:49,903 --> 00:05:53,139
If you're so attached to it,
why cut it off?
95
00:05:55,110 --> 00:05:57,974
My husband's joking,
give me the foreskin.
96
00:05:58,053 --> 00:05:59,419
Thanks Marie.
97
00:06:00,843 --> 00:06:03,552
We'll put it under
the apple tree.
98
00:06:15,233 --> 00:06:16,767
Don't you like it Marie?
99
00:06:16,798 --> 00:06:19,689
Yes Chao it's very tasty.
Just a bit dry.
100
00:06:19,759 --> 00:06:22,006
That's an understatement!
101
00:06:22,055 --> 00:06:24,138
- What kind of meat is it?
- Ostrich.
102
00:06:24,186 --> 00:06:25,271
Ostrich?
103
00:06:25,296 --> 00:06:28,732
I usually make it with pork,
it's less dry but...
104
00:06:29,632 --> 00:06:31,669
Ah, yes of course.
105
00:06:31,841 --> 00:06:35,507
I assure you Claude, I don't
eat pork but I'm not an Islamist!
106
00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:38,829
- See, I even drink wine.
- I wasn't worried that you were.
107
00:06:38,854 --> 00:06:42,938
Me too, no pork. What're you gonna do?
It's a tradition of millennia.
108
00:06:43,008 --> 00:06:44,904
I'm originally from Auvergne.
109
00:06:44,950 --> 00:06:48,779
I don't eat Aligot every day!
(Cheese & mashed potatoes)
110
00:06:48,833 --> 00:06:50,568
What nonsense papa!
111
00:06:50,626 --> 00:06:53,872
It's OK. That was humor!
I was teasing.
112
00:06:56,169 --> 00:06:58,066
Excellent, Claude!
113
00:06:59,319 --> 00:07:02,345
Is he gonna lick his balls
the whole time?
114
00:07:02,415 --> 00:07:06,343
- Benjamin's awake!
- Can I get him? - Sure Mom.
115
00:07:07,355 --> 00:07:09,728
Do you girls still eat pork?
116
00:07:09,797 --> 00:07:12,306
Don't worry, papa, I'm still
a good little French girl.
117
00:07:12,331 --> 00:07:15,402
Where's the little bunny!
The bunny.
118
00:07:15,535 --> 00:07:19,677
He's still smiling!
Doesn't look traumatized, anyway.
119
00:07:19,771 --> 00:07:22,997
- Sure Marie, he practically felt nothing.
- Felt nothing?!
120
00:07:23,049 --> 00:07:25,965
They cut his foreskin!
They didn't give him candy!
121
00:07:25,990 --> 00:07:29,758
Pardon me David but, I find
it verges on the barbaric!
122
00:07:29,822 --> 00:07:31,711
I assure you Claude, at 8 days
123
00:07:31,765 --> 00:07:34,558
a child's nervous system
is not fully formed.
124
00:07:34,601 --> 00:07:36,823
That's why Jews
do it at this age.
125
00:07:36,848 --> 00:07:39,753
Unlike the Muslims,
who do it at 6 years!
126
00:07:40,870 --> 00:07:43,868
What are you insinuating David?
Muslims are barbarians?
127
00:07:43,893 --> 00:07:46,328
David just said the
earlier the better.
128
00:07:46,353 --> 00:07:48,497
You didn't have to use
that tone!
129
00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:51,542
Sorry Isabelle, but he must've
suffered the pains of hell!
130
00:07:51,578 --> 00:07:54,756
Imagine at the age of 6,
cutting your knob!
131
00:07:57,888 --> 00:08:00,527
Seriously Rachid,
you must've suffered.
132
00:08:00,552 --> 00:08:02,935
Not at all, it's even
a fond memory!
133
00:08:02,963 --> 00:08:04,693
I'd do it again tomorrow.
134
00:08:04,731 --> 00:08:06,475
What a hypocrite!
135
00:08:06,573 --> 00:08:09,170
For pity's sake, cut the
crap between Jews and Arabs!
136
00:08:09,195 --> 00:08:10,685
Can't you make peace for once?
137
00:08:10,726 --> 00:08:13,401
Mind your business. If we
wanna argue, we'll argue,
138
00:08:13,426 --> 00:08:14,791
- huh, David?
- Absolutely Rachid.
139
00:08:14,877 --> 00:08:16,494
At least we communicate.
140
00:08:16,534 --> 00:08:19,227
Not like you Chinese!
Can't tell what you're thinking.
141
00:08:19,252 --> 00:08:20,732
What do you mean by that?
142
00:08:20,771 --> 00:08:23,513
- Chinese are two-faced?
- No I'm just saying
143
00:08:23,583 --> 00:08:26,818
the Chinese make no effort
to approach others.
144
00:08:26,843 --> 00:08:27,943
Am I not right?
145
00:08:29,075 --> 00:08:30,583
No comment.
146
00:08:30,646 --> 00:08:34,138
No opinion. Except for Chao,
I don't know any Chinese.
147
00:08:34,163 --> 00:08:37,364
I agree. Never a smile, nor a
how-do-you-do.
148
00:08:37,403 --> 00:08:40,728
Since they took over the tobacconists
I'm gonna quit smoking!
149
00:08:40,759 --> 00:08:43,339
At least Arab grocers
have a knack for commerce!
150
00:08:43,364 --> 00:08:46,763
How do you explain the Chinese taking
over the garment district from the Jews
151
00:08:46,810 --> 00:08:49,278
and Belleville from the Arabs
without a knack for commerce?
152
00:08:49,323 --> 00:08:52,388
Gotta admit, they're good!
It's true...
153
00:08:52,435 --> 00:08:56,052
David, you went bankrupt
because of the Chinese!
154
00:08:58,870 --> 00:09:02,389
Let's talk of other things.
Where are you going on holiday?
155
00:09:02,464 --> 00:09:05,732
Nowhere, this summer, I need
to prepare my exposition.
156
00:09:05,767 --> 00:09:09,437
Your paintings get more
cheerful all the time, dear.
157
00:09:10,083 --> 00:09:11,231
Huh?
158
00:09:12,632 --> 00:09:15,325
Claude, you know she's
hyper-emotional.
159
00:09:15,382 --> 00:09:17,026
I can hear you!
160
00:09:17,124 --> 00:09:19,889
I'm not hyper-emotional,
I'm sensitive.
161
00:09:19,948 --> 00:09:21,401
I know, dear.
162
00:09:21,506 --> 00:09:23,876
So Mom, what did you do
last night?
163
00:09:23,901 --> 00:09:26,990
We ate in Montmartre.
In a little ethnic bistro!
164
00:09:27,075 --> 00:09:29,545
- Great! Give me the address.
- Sure.
165
00:09:29,592 --> 00:09:33,349
Great, yes, except on our way
back we got lost in Barbès.
166
00:09:33,407 --> 00:09:35,411
That was pretty ethnic too!
167
00:09:35,601 --> 00:09:38,888
- What do you mean by ethnic?
- No harm meant, Rachid,
168
00:09:38,929 --> 00:09:41,575
but for people like us
from the provinces,
169
00:09:41,615 --> 00:09:42,879
Barbès is a shock!
170
00:09:42,925 --> 00:09:44,755
Sure! Lucky I had my passport,
171
00:09:44,802 --> 00:09:47,552
'cause all of a sudden
I was in Bab El Oued!
172
00:09:47,591 --> 00:09:48,961
You're going overboard.
173
00:09:48,986 --> 00:09:53,164
It's true. There wasn't a Frenchman
in the streets. Just an observation!
174
00:09:53,203 --> 00:09:55,568
How do you know?
Did you check their papers?
175
00:09:55,593 --> 00:09:59,240
What's this tone Rachid?
Can't we debate without anger?
176
00:09:59,287 --> 00:10:00,743
You call this a debate?
177
00:10:00,791 --> 00:10:03,446
From the start your comments
have been borderline!
178
00:10:03,487 --> 00:10:06,099
- What, border line?
- On the verge.
179
00:10:06,169 --> 00:10:07,586
The verge of racism!
180
00:10:07,616 --> 00:10:10,969
Racist? Me? I'm a Republican
Gaullist like my father!
181
00:10:11,032 --> 00:10:12,360
- Calm down.
- I am calm,
182
00:10:12,397 --> 00:10:15,431
but I can't accept being treated
like a racist! May I remind you
183
00:10:15,473 --> 00:10:19,325
that of 4 daughters I offered 3
to men of immigrant origins!
184
00:10:19,366 --> 00:10:22,201
And what have you done
for France?
185
00:10:22,264 --> 00:10:24,639
Papa, one:
you didn't "offer" us.
186
00:10:24,709 --> 00:10:26,639
Two:
General De Gaulle is dead.
187
00:10:26,691 --> 00:10:28,021
Three: cool it!
188
00:10:28,594 --> 00:10:31,639
- Come, Marie, back to Chinon.
- But Claude...
189
00:10:31,717 --> 00:10:33,326
Claude, there's dessert!
190
00:10:33,406 --> 00:10:35,966
No thanks, I don't like lychees!
191
00:10:38,791 --> 00:10:40,884
I didn't prepare lychees.
192
00:10:41,821 --> 00:10:44,009
Never seen such
irritable people!
193
00:10:44,063 --> 00:10:47,148
That was no lunch, it was an
Anti Racism meeting! (LICRA)
194
00:10:47,180 --> 00:10:49,594
- True, they aren't easy to...
- I can't stand them, anymore!
195
00:10:49,642 --> 00:10:52,534
That boot licker, Chao,
with his laugh...
196
00:10:52,559 --> 00:10:54,763
Like a strangled chicken.
197
00:10:54,818 --> 00:10:58,298
Personally, I find David hard to take.
Odile deserved better.
198
00:10:58,338 --> 00:11:00,695
Much better!
Odile's a brillant girl.
199
00:11:00,762 --> 00:11:02,820
He's just a loser
living off her.
200
00:11:02,848 --> 00:11:06,685
I thought Jews were gifted for business.
Evidently, not all.
201
00:11:06,795 --> 00:11:08,685
The most difficult is Rachid.
202
00:11:08,718 --> 00:11:11,473
He's the WORST!
Always nitpicking!
203
00:11:11,661 --> 00:11:14,410
We really hit the jackpot,
my dear.
204
00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:19,071
I shit bricks, making
this tarte normande!
205
00:11:19,997 --> 00:11:22,161
- I'm ashamed.
- Me too.
206
00:11:22,240 --> 00:11:23,708
Don't take it seriously.
207
00:11:23,778 --> 00:11:26,723
You know papa, he can't help
being provocative.
208
00:11:26,779 --> 00:11:28,005
Put yourself in his shoes.
209
00:11:28,075 --> 00:11:30,691
Barbès to a provincial is
"Close Encounters of the Third Kind"
210
00:11:30,730 --> 00:11:32,807
Oh, yeah? If he'd gone
to the 13th district
211
00:11:32,839 --> 00:11:34,827
and felt he was in Peking?
What would you say?
212
00:11:34,869 --> 00:11:37,080
Nothing. They're all Chinese,
why deny it?
213
00:11:37,105 --> 00:11:38,700
If he'd said all
Arabs are thieves...
214
00:11:38,732 --> 00:11:40,165
- All thieves?
- Darling...
215
00:11:40,220 --> 00:11:43,676
That wasn't me speaking.
I was in the shoes of a racist.
216
00:11:43,701 --> 00:11:46,365
Stay in your own shoes and
avoid these amalgams, OK?
217
00:11:46,399 --> 00:11:48,399
What if I said
your dick is tiny?
218
00:11:48,436 --> 00:11:50,122
- What?
- Enough!
219
00:11:50,336 --> 00:11:53,590
How can you possibly
be such twats?
220
00:11:56,685 --> 00:11:59,096
She really needs to find a guy
to mellow her out.
221
00:11:59,153 --> 00:12:02,314
No big deal. Chao made a
delicious tarte normande!
222
00:12:02,339 --> 00:12:04,591
Who wants some tarte normande?
223
00:12:04,687 --> 00:12:08,685
- No thanks we have to go.
- Us too. Benjamin is tired.
224
00:12:14,630 --> 00:12:16,520
Damn, how is this possible?
225
00:12:16,590 --> 00:12:18,092
Did you block me like this?
226
00:12:18,117 --> 00:12:21,230
No. the guy in front must've
pushed mine into yours.
227
00:12:21,255 --> 00:12:25,669
Are you fucking with me? That car was already
there when I came! Fuck, we'll never get out!
228
00:12:25,694 --> 00:12:26,804
What a dumbass!
229
00:12:26,835 --> 00:12:29,982
Don't call me a dumbass for
parallel parking, dumbass!
230
00:12:30,017 --> 00:12:31,466
Who are these children?
231
00:12:31,498 --> 00:12:34,685
Come back for dessert.
My tarte normande is super!
232
00:12:34,718 --> 00:12:36,365
If it's as dry as your ostrich
233
00:12:36,390 --> 00:12:38,967
you can shove it up your ass!
- Pardon?
234
00:12:38,992 --> 00:12:41,523
- David, what's this vulgarity?
- It's his fault!
235
00:12:41,548 --> 00:12:44,292
He poisoned the atmosphere
with his allusions to pork!
236
00:12:44,317 --> 00:12:47,795
You couldn't make stir-fried
noodles, you pitiful twat?
237
00:12:47,863 --> 00:12:50,194
This is gonna end badly.
238
00:12:51,522 --> 00:12:54,748
Know what, David? Forget our
appointment and forget my bank.
239
00:12:54,779 --> 00:12:58,052
You can get bent before I finance
your shitty 'vintage phone' project!
240
00:12:58,122 --> 00:13:02,620
Think I need you? I have more contacts
in banks than you'll ever have. Buffoon!
241
00:13:02,664 --> 00:13:05,146
Hey get with the times.
They've changed!
242
00:13:05,208 --> 00:13:08,560
Jews in finance, is over!
We Chinese have the wind in our sails.
243
00:13:08,607 --> 00:13:10,849
We're buying up everything.
Everything!
244
00:13:10,888 --> 00:13:13,610
Deauville, your yarmulkes,
even Israel.
245
00:13:13,669 --> 00:13:18,114
I swear on my Grandmother's grave I'm gonna
smash his face! - Bring it on, Falafel!
246
00:13:18,115 --> 00:13:20,794
I did 5 years of Krav Maga
You'll know pain.
247
00:13:20,943 --> 00:13:24,921
- Aren't you going to do something?
- If I did I'd flatten both of them! - Really!
248
00:13:29,224 --> 00:13:32,282
- Are you bloody crazy?
- He attacked, I defended myself!
249
00:13:32,307 --> 00:13:35,036
Do you see a sign that says
'Tibetan'?
250
00:13:35,161 --> 00:13:38,777
Throat punch...
Typical Chinese trick.
251
00:13:51,649 --> 00:13:54,461
Yes, my little Clovis,
we're coming.
252
00:13:55,247 --> 00:13:57,874
Papa and mama are home,
my baby!
253
00:13:58,872 --> 00:14:02,060
What? Oh you're hungry!
So are we, you know.
254
00:14:02,136 --> 00:14:05,216
We ate some very bad Chinese.
255
00:14:05,273 --> 00:14:06,990
Oh it was awful!
256
00:14:08,177 --> 00:14:10,506
We ate rubber, my puppy!
257
00:14:13,997 --> 00:14:17,778
Bury a foreskin... what rot!
Should'a thrown it in the dump!
258
00:14:17,870 --> 00:14:20,949
They gave us a religious,
sacred mission.
259
00:14:20,974 --> 00:14:23,513
Yeah, yeah, religious. sacred!...
260
00:14:23,660 --> 00:14:26,021
Where's that box?
261
00:14:30,201 --> 00:14:32,716
- Oh, vile!
- Put it back, it's disgusting!
262
00:14:32,767 --> 00:14:34,623
Ugh, I can't touch it!
263
00:14:34,794 --> 00:14:36,937
Clovis, don't touch!
264
00:14:37,991 --> 00:14:40,506
This idiot ate the foreskin!
265
00:14:42,163 --> 00:14:43,280
Oh!
266
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:45,633
He pigged out!
267
00:14:50,607 --> 00:14:53,958
- Oh, what the hell...
- Don't even think it!
268
00:14:54,779 --> 00:14:58,865
Apart from you, me and Clovis
no one will ever know.
269
00:15:01,145 --> 00:15:02,732
I'll bury the box too.
270
00:15:02,794 --> 00:15:05,068
Mustn't leave a trace. Voila! Hop!
271
00:15:07,556 --> 00:15:09,853
They asked us; we did it.
272
00:15:10,517 --> 00:15:13,869
C'mon, a little whisky.
I'd like a whisky now.
273
00:15:17,925 --> 00:15:20,808
[Chinon eighteen months later]
274
00:15:21,027 --> 00:15:24,972
Everything's fine Mme Verneuil. You
have the arteries of a 20 year old girl.
275
00:15:25,011 --> 00:15:26,499
It's not possible!
276
00:15:26,649 --> 00:15:29,449
I don't eat, I sleep all time...
277
00:15:29,630 --> 00:15:31,404
I must have something!
278
00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:33,097
It's in your head.
279
00:15:33,168 --> 00:15:35,500
You have all the
symptoms of depression.
280
00:15:35,564 --> 00:15:37,911
I think you should consult
a specialist.
281
00:15:37,998 --> 00:15:39,600
Specialist?
282
00:15:40,753 --> 00:15:42,545
You mean a shrink?
283
00:15:47,876 --> 00:15:49,063
Father?
284
00:15:49,154 --> 00:15:50,420
- Oh!
- Father.
285
00:15:50,505 --> 00:15:52,496
Oh God, not her!
286
00:15:52,521 --> 00:15:55,166
I dedicated my whole life
to my daughters,
287
00:15:55,209 --> 00:15:58,651
I sacrified everything so they'd
be happy and lack nothing.
288
00:15:58,692 --> 00:16:03,027
With what result? I don't see them anymore.
I hardly know my grandchildren.
289
00:16:03,086 --> 00:16:05,529
Family life is
complicated enough
290
00:16:05,591 --> 00:16:08,115
if you add problems of culture,
291
00:16:08,168 --> 00:16:10,135
religious and education, it's...
292
00:16:10,193 --> 00:16:12,069
We've talked about
this Mme Verneuil.
293
00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:16,383
What's happening to your family isn't
serious.You need to adapt! it's globalization!
294
00:16:16,384 --> 00:16:20,715
My bishop is Madagascan. It wasn't easy
at first but now everything's great!
295
00:16:20,755 --> 00:16:23,677
I know Doctor... er, Father!
296
00:16:23,794 --> 00:16:28,212
I hate myself for thinking this, but I
so wished they'd married in this church.
297
00:16:28,213 --> 00:16:32,000
It's where I was married,
where my parents were married...
298
00:16:32,025 --> 00:16:34,023
where my aunt Geneviève
had her Communion.
299
00:16:34,055 --> 00:16:36,438
273 Euros?
What's this bullshit?!
300
00:16:36,523 --> 00:16:38,867
- What? Pardon?
- Nothing...
301
00:16:38,927 --> 00:16:42,397
I was thinking of your youngest.
Laure, right? - Right.
302
00:16:42,424 --> 00:16:45,466
She might marry a Catholic.
Keep the faith!
303
00:16:45,482 --> 00:16:48,912
From your mouth to God's ear,
Father!
304
00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:59,188
- What are you doing?
- Don't distract me ...
305
00:16:59,235 --> 00:17:02,941
I'm editing my address on
modifying the marriage contract
306
00:17:02,966 --> 00:17:05,201
with respect to
Community property.
307
00:17:05,263 --> 00:17:07,333
It's a contribution I
absolutetely must do
308
00:17:07,372 --> 00:17:11,372
before the big annual meeting of the Chamber of
Notaries Association of Toulouse, this Friday.
309
00:17:11,422 --> 00:17:14,786
No need to be rude! Not today.
310
00:17:15,080 --> 00:17:17,177
- I saw the Doctor and..
- And?
311
00:17:17,263 --> 00:17:21,154
- He diagnosed, depression.
- Ah, you had me scared, for a sec!
312
00:17:21,201 --> 00:17:25,082
Depression can be very serious.
Many people never get over it!
313
00:17:25,136 --> 00:17:27,129
Of course, darling!
I'm sorry.
314
00:17:27,154 --> 00:17:30,738
I miss my daughters you know!
- Yes, yes....
315
00:17:31,302 --> 00:17:32,495
I know.
316
00:17:32,982 --> 00:17:34,326
I know, I know.
317
00:17:35,638 --> 00:17:39,661
How about inviting them for Christmas?
- Who? - Our daughters,
318
00:17:39,725 --> 00:17:43,301
their husbands, their children.
I need to see them grow up.
319
00:17:43,353 --> 00:17:46,171
Did you see what
happened last time?
320
00:17:46,235 --> 00:17:50,849
It was a bit our fault, too,
with our negative preconceptions.
321
00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:55,347
Before asking them to understand us we
should take a step toward them! - Huh?
322
00:17:55,348 --> 00:17:58,497
Look darling, we made
so much effort, already!
323
00:17:58,536 --> 00:18:02,591
I wonder if this effort may
contribute your depression.
324
00:18:03,629 --> 00:18:05,208
You think so?
325
00:18:06,843 --> 00:18:10,466
The kosher market is expanding,
the organic market too.
326
00:18:10,513 --> 00:18:13,255
Both together will be
a smash hit!
327
00:18:13,747 --> 00:18:14,983
It'll flop.
328
00:18:15,008 --> 00:18:16,575
- Flop?
- Flop!
329
00:18:16,684 --> 00:18:19,213
There are about 600,000
Jews in France.
330
00:18:19,263 --> 00:18:22,102
Out of 600,000, how many
keep kosher? 20%?
331
00:18:22,127 --> 00:18:24,224
- More...
- 30%, to be generous.
332
00:18:24,279 --> 00:18:26,396
30% of 600,000 makes 180,000.
333
00:18:26,421 --> 00:18:30,021
Out of 180,000, a maximum
of 10% eat organic, right? - OK.
334
00:18:30,069 --> 00:18:32,731
Not even 20,000
potential clients!
335
00:18:33,021 --> 00:18:35,615
20,000.
Yours is a micro market.
336
00:18:35,677 --> 00:18:39,481
A microcredit institution
would be more appropriate.
337
00:18:40,269 --> 00:18:41,646
Bravo!
338
00:18:42,263 --> 00:18:45,542
Don't you eat Kosher?
- No, I don't. - Your mother?
339
00:18:45,589 --> 00:18:49,772
- She died 6 months ago.
- Ah! She won't eat kosher for sure!
340
00:18:49,902 --> 00:18:52,178
- Pardon.
- Leave.
341
00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:56,436
Fuck him! (and his race)
342
00:18:58,326 --> 00:19:01,124
- Yes, dear?
- How was your appointment?
343
00:19:01,139 --> 00:19:03,295
- Bad, as usual.
- Don't give up!
344
00:19:03,320 --> 00:19:05,475
BioMitzvah is a super idea!
345
00:19:05,623 --> 00:19:08,257
2 seconds M. Berger,
I'll be all yours.
346
00:19:08,306 --> 00:19:11,052
OK, good news, we're
leaving for Christmas!
347
00:19:11,087 --> 00:19:12,762
- Skiing?
- No, Chinon.
348
00:19:12,787 --> 00:19:15,426
- Family reunion.
- This is GOOD news?!
349
00:19:15,457 --> 00:19:17,676
Jacky Chan and
Arafat coming too?
350
00:19:17,746 --> 00:19:20,949
Gotta go. Have a good day,
see you tonight love.
351
00:19:20,998 --> 00:19:22,926
Your turn M. Berger!
352
00:19:25,149 --> 00:19:28,396
Hey, they have no proof,
I had the 'shit'. I'm innocent!
353
00:19:28,397 --> 00:19:32,313
No proof, but you're not innocent yet!
So keep a low profile and let me do my bit.
354
00:19:32,314 --> 00:19:33,482
Ok bro.
355
00:19:33,552 --> 00:19:36,420
Woah! I'm not your bro,
I'm your advocate!
356
00:19:36,544 --> 00:19:39,927
Meh, advocate!
I eat 'advocados' for lunch.
357
00:19:40,644 --> 00:19:42,517
It's me, dear, you called?
358
00:19:42,544 --> 00:19:45,228
I'm still at Bobigny Courts.
- How's it going?
359
00:19:45,314 --> 00:19:48,205
Pft! A brainless hoodie,
for a change.
360
00:19:49,697 --> 00:19:52,452
What do you mean, Christmas with your parents?
361
00:19:54,920 --> 00:19:57,326
Oh fuck, what an asshole!
Hold on...
362
00:19:57,387 --> 00:19:59,748
This is your 'low profile'?
363
00:20:00,912 --> 00:20:04,027
Hey, what are you doing, bro?
Piss off!
364
00:20:04,402 --> 00:20:07,668
Excuse me dear, I was
with 'brainless hoodie'.
365
00:20:07,832 --> 00:20:10,217
Ye..., no, tell me who's coming?
366
00:20:10,558 --> 00:20:13,251
Don't tell me, Bruce Lee and *Popeck?
(Yiiddish comic)
367
00:20:13,306 --> 00:20:15,508
With Gaddafi and *Enrico Macias?
(Alger/Jew singer)
368
00:20:15,533 --> 00:20:17,588
It's not funny,
Mom's depressed.
369
00:20:17,650 --> 00:20:19,056
Ah, pardon...
370
00:20:19,223 --> 00:20:23,661
Hear that, girls?
You'll meet your aunties and unkies!
371
00:20:24,209 --> 00:20:25,342
Oh, yeah!
372
00:20:26,295 --> 00:20:29,788
Sorry Mom, couldn't call earlier,
I had crazy day.
373
00:20:30,247 --> 00:20:32,638
Yes, I know, Odile texted me.
374
00:20:32,708 --> 00:20:36,030
Of course I'll come,
it's a very good idea.
375
00:20:36,463 --> 00:20:39,353
OK, I'll let you go to sleep.
Kisses for you...
376
00:20:39,416 --> 00:20:41,550
and kiss papa for me.
377
00:20:43,621 --> 00:20:46,166
- It was my mother.
- I heard
377
00:20:45,621 --> 00:20:49,434
{\an5}[The Turkey or "Sauce for the Goose"]
by Georges Feydeau.
378
00:20:46,260 --> 00:20:49,434
She wants the whole
family for Christmas.
379
00:20:51,053 --> 00:20:52,471
Am I invited?
380
00:20:52,530 --> 00:20:56,525
Well... soon! Next Christmas,
if all goes well.
381
00:20:56,699 --> 00:21:00,447
So a Chinese, a Jew, an Arab
get a pass but a Black?...
382
00:21:00,565 --> 00:21:03,898
It's equal opportunity marriage
except for Africans? - Idiot...
383
00:21:03,948 --> 00:21:06,552
I remind you, I haven't met
YOUR family yet!
384
00:21:06,583 --> 00:21:11,508
Don't change the subject. No problem
on my side! They just live far, otherwise...
385
00:21:11,553 --> 00:21:13,602
My parents are very tolerant.
386
00:21:13,711 --> 00:21:17,130
In Africa, it's open door policy.
Anybody can enter.
387
00:21:17,199 --> 00:21:21,770
There's no white, no black; humanity
above all. - I'm sorry Charles.
388
00:21:22,099 --> 00:21:24,963
Problem is, you come
after the other 3, see?
389
00:21:24,988 --> 00:21:25,984
Yeah.
390
00:21:26,291 --> 00:21:29,530
Be patient, I need to
prepare them for the shock.
391
00:21:29,604 --> 00:21:30,838
I'm the shock?!
392
00:21:31,735 --> 00:21:33,295
Yes, you are.
393
00:21:33,546 --> 00:21:35,483
You're my shock.
394
00:21:37,100 --> 00:21:39,209
My 'shockolate'!
395
00:21:39,881 --> 00:21:42,741
My little Swiss cheese-cake!
396
00:21:44,728 --> 00:21:46,489
Take that off!
397
00:21:47,427 --> 00:21:50,177
Josianne, I'm going to
Tours for groceries.
398
00:21:50,202 --> 00:21:51,643
Ok, Madame!
399
00:21:54,474 --> 00:21:57,513
- ***
- *** [Ar]
400
00:21:58,411 --> 00:22:00,317
- Hello Madame.
- Hello Monsieur.
401
00:22:00,372 --> 00:22:03,880
- What would you like?
- I'd like a turkey please.
402
00:22:04,909 --> 00:22:06,893
Excuse me, is it Halal?
403
00:22:06,932 --> 00:22:10,364
Yes Madame, everything
is guaranteed, Halal!
404
00:22:10,606 --> 00:22:13,825
Even old bourgeois dames
are converting to Islam.
405
00:22:13,850 --> 00:22:16,029
This country's going balls up!
406
00:22:19,669 --> 00:22:21,966
I'll see you out.
407
00:22:22,709 --> 00:22:25,209
Thanks a lot Madame.
Shabbat Shalom!
408
00:22:25,258 --> 00:22:27,654
Thank you, Shalabat
Shalom to you!
409
00:22:27,679 --> 00:22:28,904
Thanks.
410
00:22:33,206 --> 00:22:36,222
Hello, can I to speak
with the cook, please?
411
00:22:36,667 --> 00:22:38,214
Health Department?
412
00:22:38,281 --> 00:22:42,050
Oh not at all, I just need
some advice on a recipe!
413
00:22:43,037 --> 00:22:46,552
Hey, lao Liao, come out here.
There's a customer.... [Mand]
414
00:22:47,850 --> 00:22:49,208
Good evening Dear.
415
00:22:49,233 --> 00:22:52,449
Evening, I'm preparing
vegetable soup. - Mm!
416
00:22:53,035 --> 00:22:56,573
I saw the Dupuy-Jambards
at the office this afternoon.
417
00:22:56,574 --> 00:23:00,237
- Their son Xavier is at Chinon for Christmas.
- Isn't he in Washington?
418
00:23:00,238 --> 00:23:02,819
Yes but he visits his
family for the holidays.
419
00:23:02,820 --> 00:23:05,318
- Why are you telling me?
- Why do you think?
420
00:23:05,403 --> 00:23:07,482
Laure and Xavier could work!
421
00:23:07,514 --> 00:23:10,865
Xavier Dupuy-Jambard?!
He's frightfully ugly!
422
00:23:10,943 --> 00:23:12,677
You gotta know what you want!
423
00:23:12,716 --> 00:23:15,857
He's from Tours he's Catholic
and from a good family!
424
00:23:15,911 --> 00:23:17,336
And not that ugly.
425
00:23:17,361 --> 00:23:19,958
Personality is more
important in a man.
426
00:23:20,021 --> 00:23:22,186
Xavier Dupuy-Jambard!...
427
00:23:24,345 --> 00:23:27,228
Hurry, you'll miss your plane!
- Yeah, OK!
428
00:23:31,903 --> 00:23:33,712
Oh, I forgot...
429
00:23:36,005 --> 00:23:39,820
Mademoiselle Laure Verneuil will
you take to be your husband,
430
00:23:39,888 --> 00:23:41,898
myself, Charles Koffi the first?
431
00:23:41,942 --> 00:23:43,461
- You serious?
- Yes!
432
00:23:43,512 --> 00:23:46,875
I'm fed up being the
stowaway of the family.
433
00:23:49,044 --> 00:23:50,574
I accept!
434
00:23:54,714 --> 00:23:57,183
- OK, gotta go.
- I love you!
435
00:23:57,888 --> 00:24:00,180
You have no choice,
now, it's official!
436
00:24:00,227 --> 00:24:02,822
You have to tell your
family the good news!
437
00:24:03,298 --> 00:24:05,680
Merry Christmas, Darling!
438
00:24:09,515 --> 00:24:13,538
I'm just saying, don't talk
about Tobbacconists! - Ok ok...
439
00:24:13,628 --> 00:24:16,084
If someone spouts
cliches about Jews,
440
00:24:16,109 --> 00:24:19,621
like they're over represented
in the media or dentists,
441
00:24:19,763 --> 00:24:21,821
- you let it slide ok?
- Ok.
442
00:24:21,923 --> 00:24:23,216
But, I'm telling you,
443
00:24:23,263 --> 00:24:25,874
first one who prods me about
Israel, I'll fuck his whole race!
444
00:24:25,875 --> 00:24:29,209
Will you stop all this fucking
"his race", or his mother",
445
00:24:29,264 --> 00:24:31,038
or "on your grandfather's grave"
446
00:24:31,039 --> 00:24:33,392
It's vulgar. Do you understand?
447
00:24:33,417 --> 00:24:35,011
It shocks my parents.
448
00:24:35,036 --> 00:24:37,919
What should I say?
"Jesus Christ"?
449
00:24:38,654 --> 00:24:41,099
Rachid, let's not flog this to death
450
00:24:41,138 --> 00:24:44,691
if someone associates
immigration and delinquency,
451
00:24:44,911 --> 00:24:47,911
just say nothing, keep
it to yourself, huh?
452
00:24:48,115 --> 00:24:50,530
Asking me to be a
coward, is that it? - No!
453
00:24:50,555 --> 00:24:52,685
Just be cool, nice, relaxed...
454
00:24:52,905 --> 00:24:55,512
...intelligent.
Is it possible?
455
00:24:55,965 --> 00:24:57,744
It's green.
456
00:24:59,348 --> 00:25:03,827
And if someone takes a dig at the
Chinese, what do I do? - You smile.
457
00:25:04,172 --> 00:25:07,703
- So I play the Chinese, in fact.
- Voila.
458
00:25:08,559 --> 00:25:10,214
Are we agreed, Claude?
459
00:25:10,255 --> 00:25:12,115
Avoid all sensitive subjects
460
00:25:12,177 --> 00:25:15,052
Israel, the Dalaï Lama,
the burqa, all that.
461
00:25:15,153 --> 00:25:16,544
Yes, yes, yes.
462
00:25:16,609 --> 00:25:21,068
Above all, not a word about the
French soccer team! - Yes, yes, yes!
463
00:25:26,588 --> 00:25:30,272
Voilà! No one would ever know
(this wasn't normal)
464
00:25:31,170 --> 00:25:32,763
Ah, the first guests!
465
00:25:32,865 --> 00:25:34,891
I bet 20 Euros it's
the Chinese.
466
00:25:34,974 --> 00:25:37,013
Don't start!... Put on a tie.
467
00:25:37,061 --> 00:25:40,894
It's fine, we're not receiving
the Queen of England!
468
00:25:45,286 --> 00:25:46,880
Ah! I won.
469
00:25:47,676 --> 00:25:50,247
You owe me 20 Euros Darling.
470
00:26:15,841 --> 00:26:17,490
Charles!
471
00:26:20,699 --> 00:26:23,716
3 hours late!
Royal Air Marocco, it's the last time.
472
00:26:23,800 --> 00:26:25,847
- My baby!
- How are you Mom?
473
00:26:25,902 --> 00:26:28,230
Hey, little sis?
How are you papa?
474
00:26:28,422 --> 00:26:31,403
So you're living with
Catherine Deneuve?
475
00:26:31,886 --> 00:26:33,255
Did you rat me out?
476
00:26:33,301 --> 00:26:36,895
You promised to invite me to Paris.
Still waiting for the ticket!
477
00:26:36,944 --> 00:26:39,262
My bag's packed since 1920!
478
00:26:43,181 --> 00:26:45,053
No, I was going to tell you!
479
00:26:45,078 --> 00:26:46,494
Her name is Laure.
480
00:26:46,603 --> 00:26:49,150
We've lived together for a year.
- A year and half!
481
00:26:49,221 --> 00:26:50,727
A year and half?!
482
00:26:51,368 --> 00:26:53,419
So you're going to get married?
483
00:26:53,474 --> 00:26:54,685
Yes.
484
00:26:54,775 --> 00:26:57,601
Not only did you stop your
studies to be a clown,
485
00:26:57,672 --> 00:27:00,377
but to top it all you're
gonna marry a white woman!
486
00:27:00,402 --> 00:27:04,060
- But papa...
- And cut your hair! Unbelievable!
487
00:27:15,446 --> 00:27:17,876
It highlights the
entranceway, huh?
488
00:27:18,002 --> 00:27:20,493
Eugénie, sweety!
489
00:27:21,228 --> 00:27:22,628
Give me!
490
00:27:24,559 --> 00:27:27,130
Aww! So cute!
491
00:27:28,049 --> 00:27:30,995
Thank you. Who drew this?
492
00:27:31,073 --> 00:27:35,018
Funny how they show a family
resemblance to Aunt Geneviève.
493
00:27:35,043 --> 00:27:37,904
Yes darlings, Auntie Geneviève. Yes!
494
00:27:38,373 --> 00:27:39,678
Give it to papa?
495
00:27:39,786 --> 00:27:43,177
No Rudy, see, it's not a camel. It's a goat.
496
00:27:43,279 --> 00:27:45,591
You like that kids? Pretty, huh?
497
00:27:45,801 --> 00:27:47,818
It's called a Nativity Scene.
498
00:27:47,968 --> 00:27:51,638
Here's the donkey. Hee Haw..
499
00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:56,633
And this is the ox. Moooo...
500
00:27:57,552 --> 00:27:59,700
And here...
501
00:27:59,950 --> 00:28:01,950
is baby Jesus.
502
00:28:02,277 --> 00:28:04,357
He's the son of God.
503
00:28:05,659 --> 00:28:07,407
See you later.
504
00:28:08,100 --> 00:28:11,147
Your Grandma oversells
Jesus a bit.
505
00:28:11,246 --> 00:28:13,061
He's just a prophet.
506
00:28:13,108 --> 00:28:14,366
Yes, just a prof...
507
00:28:14,467 --> 00:28:17,825
Unkie David's right, huh?
He's just a prophet!
508
00:28:17,888 --> 00:28:19,122
Oh, yeah!
509
00:28:19,671 --> 00:28:22,763
- I don't feel it.
- Claude, you promised!
510
00:28:22,857 --> 00:28:23,912
C'mon!
511
00:28:26,496 --> 00:28:29,399
If I may take the opportunity
of your presence,
512
00:28:29,424 --> 00:28:32,809
in this home where our daughters
grew up, to apologize.
513
00:28:32,868 --> 00:28:36,208
I'm sincerely sorry my remarks
shocked you last time.
514
00:28:36,247 --> 00:28:38,302
But it was meant without malice
515
00:28:38,341 --> 00:28:40,490
No problem, it's bygone stuff.
516
00:28:40,544 --> 00:28:42,865
Ah, you pluck a
thorn from my foot!
517
00:28:42,896 --> 00:28:47,787
Because as a Gaullist I was very
saddened to be taken for a racist!
518
00:28:47,982 --> 00:28:50,467
My words overshot my
intentions Claude.
519
00:28:50,492 --> 00:28:53,636
Besides, we all harbor a
little racism deep down.
520
00:28:53,747 --> 00:28:57,714
In any case, I want you to know
that we have nothing against
521
00:28:57,739 --> 00:29:00,769
Jews, Arabs or Chinese.
522
00:29:00,803 --> 00:29:04,638
M-hm! Especially since you're French like us!
- Absolutely!
523
00:29:04,949 --> 00:29:07,759
To be perfectly honest
from the start,
524
00:29:08,041 --> 00:29:10,943
you weren't the ideal
sons-in-law, huh?
525
00:29:12,187 --> 00:29:15,193
Don't take it the wrong way!
- No, no...
526
00:29:15,271 --> 00:29:19,990
Imagine my father's face, if all of my
sisters had married men from Auvergne!
527
00:29:20,068 --> 00:29:24,349
Personally my mother had a hard time
accepting Odile! - I can confirm that!
528
00:29:24,350 --> 00:29:26,357
But, mine were delighted...
529
00:29:26,463 --> 00:29:29,911
Except when I announced
she was an artist painter.
530
00:29:30,462 --> 00:29:33,532
What's most important is
our daughters' happiness.
531
00:29:33,557 --> 00:29:36,501
If they're happy with you,
so are we. In short...
532
00:29:36,564 --> 00:29:40,040
all 3 of you are welcome
in the Verneuil family.
533
00:29:40,296 --> 00:29:41,520
Thank you.
534
00:29:41,596 --> 00:29:44,933
I propose a toast to the family.
535
00:29:45,177 --> 00:29:46,845
To the family!
536
00:29:47,899 --> 00:29:49,323
Problem, darling?
537
00:29:49,449 --> 00:29:51,375
Pardon me, but...
538
00:29:51,981 --> 00:29:53,435
it's snowing!
539
00:29:55,868 --> 00:29:58,529
- Yes, and...?
- Well, it's...
540
00:29:59,535 --> 00:30:01,537
it's the magic of Christmas!
541
00:30:01,615 --> 00:30:02,857
Yes?...
542
00:30:04,036 --> 00:30:08,035
- To the magic of Christmas!
- To the magic of Christmas!
543
00:30:12,060 --> 00:30:14,373
- How was I, OK?
- You were perfect!
544
00:30:14,398 --> 00:30:18,061
- You sure I didn't overdo it?
- No, it was good.
545
00:30:21,792 --> 00:30:24,732
Oh, 3 turkeys!
Didn't you overdo it?
546
00:30:24,757 --> 00:30:26,151
There are 9 of us.
547
00:30:26,243 --> 00:30:28,573
I wanted to surprize
my sons in law!
548
00:30:28,628 --> 00:30:31,019
This one is Kosher,
this one Halal,
549
00:30:31,105 --> 00:30:34,912
The third one was specially laquered
by a Chinese cook.
550
00:30:35,502 --> 00:30:38,790
I'm touched, Marie, but I don't
eat exclusively Halal.
551
00:30:38,834 --> 00:30:41,185
- Nor I, Kosher!
- Nor I, laquered.
552
00:30:41,248 --> 00:30:42,287
Ah.
553
00:30:43,324 --> 00:30:44,550
Mm!
554
00:30:44,969 --> 00:30:49,083
Marie it's delicious! Lacquered roast
turkey would be a big hit!
555
00:30:49,121 --> 00:30:50,660
Thank you.
556
00:30:51,583 --> 00:30:54,984
Can I try your Kosher turkey
David, please? - Sure.
557
00:30:58,904 --> 00:31:01,436
It's good. Want some Halal?
558
00:31:01,563 --> 00:31:03,287
Certainly not!
559
00:31:08,686 --> 00:31:10,725
Hah! I'm joking.
560
00:31:11,453 --> 00:31:13,991
Obviously, I'll taste
your halal turkey!
561
00:31:14,016 --> 00:31:15,806
Very funny! Ah, David!
562
00:31:16,130 --> 00:31:19,630
That's true Jewish humor.
Marie and I love it!
563
00:31:19,818 --> 00:31:21,841
We're fans of Louis De Funès.
564
00:31:21,872 --> 00:31:24,198
Louis De Funès
wasn't Jewish, mom.
565
00:31:24,255 --> 00:31:27,792
Sure he was! *Rabbi Jacob!
(Film character)
566
00:31:28,706 --> 00:31:30,402
Oh, yeah, yeah...
567
00:31:30,466 --> 00:31:33,277
What about Chinese humor, Chao?
568
00:31:33,714 --> 00:31:35,692
- No such thing.
- How's that?
569
00:31:35,747 --> 00:31:37,339
It doesn't exist.
570
00:31:37,418 --> 00:31:39,357
Chinese have no humor.
571
00:31:39,412 --> 00:31:40,443
Huh?!
572
00:31:41,305 --> 00:31:43,575
I'm kidding, Claude!
573
00:31:48,107 --> 00:31:51,021
It's local Pear Brandy
and let me tell you,
574
00:31:51,135 --> 00:31:52,365
this...
575
00:31:52,615 --> 00:31:53,990
is NOT Kosher!
576
00:31:55,295 --> 00:31:57,715
We open the gifts tonight
or tomorrow?
577
00:31:57,740 --> 00:32:00,051
Tomorrow as usual.
Really Isabel!
578
00:32:00,113 --> 00:32:03,505
- Tonight is Midnight Mass!
- Yes of course mama, Mass!
579
00:32:03,562 --> 00:32:06,047
- Impossible to miss it!
- Impossible!
580
00:32:06,164 --> 00:32:08,493
Go ahead, make fun of me...
581
00:32:09,618 --> 00:32:11,595
- How are they doing?
- Great.
582
00:32:11,681 --> 00:32:14,869
Alcohol brings the peoples
of the world together!
583
00:32:15,458 --> 00:32:17,476
I was a bit skeptical,
but it turns out
584
00:32:17,501 --> 00:32:19,443
it's a super idea to
all get together.
585
00:32:19,474 --> 00:32:22,974
- Really? You're pleased?
- Very pleased! - Sure mama!
586
00:32:23,029 --> 00:32:24,310
Aw...
587
00:32:29,455 --> 00:32:31,416
Oh, something worrying you?
588
00:32:31,494 --> 00:32:33,588
No! Not at all, I'm fine.
589
00:32:33,893 --> 00:32:35,041
OK, mama?
590
00:32:36,685 --> 00:32:38,447
You're suffocating me!
591
00:32:39,357 --> 00:32:41,421
When I watch France play soccer
592
00:32:41,446 --> 00:32:43,443
and I hear the Marseillaise,
593
00:32:43,589 --> 00:32:45,324
- I get shivers!
- Oh, yeah?
594
00:32:45,360 --> 00:32:47,716
Me too. My hair stands on end!
595
00:32:47,755 --> 00:32:51,198
- Same here. And I hate soccer.
- You're pulling my leg!
596
00:32:51,237 --> 00:32:55,401
Do you know the Marseillaise? Because
usually players of foreign origins...
597
00:32:55,464 --> 00:32:58,919
Come, sons of the fatherland
♪ Allons enfants de la patrie
598
00:32:58,989 --> 00:33:02,786
Our day of glory has arrived
♪ le jour de gloire est arrivé!
599
00:33:03,104 --> 00:33:06,521
Against us tyranny's
♪ Contre nous de la tyrannie
600
00:33:06,958 --> 00:33:10,740
bloody standard is raised
♪ L'étendard sanglant est levé
601
00:33:10,822 --> 00:33:14,456
bloody standard is raised
♪ L'étendard sanglant est levé!
602
00:33:14,511 --> 00:33:17,824
Do you hear in the countrysides
♪ Entendez-vous dans vos campagnes
603
00:33:17,894 --> 00:33:21,904
The bellowing of fierce soldiers?
♪ Mugir ces féroces soldats?
604
00:33:21,990 --> 00:33:25,821
Who come at arm's length
♪ Qui viennent jusque dans vos bras
605
00:33:25,846 --> 00:33:30,107
To slit the throats of your children and wives!
♪ Egorger vos fils vos compagnes!
606
00:33:30,161 --> 00:33:33,042
To arms citizens
♪ Aux armes citoyens!
607
00:33:33,834 --> 00:33:36,998
Form your battallions
♪ Formez vos bataillons!
608
00:33:37,342 --> 00:33:41,172
Let us march, march
♪ Marchons marchons
609
00:33:41,565 --> 00:33:44,880
That their impure blood
♪ Qu'un sang impur
610
00:33:44,974 --> 00:33:48,169
Shall irrigate our fields!
♪ Abreuve nos sillons!
611
00:33:48,232 --> 00:33:49,677
♪ Tan ta-da!
612
00:33:51,192 --> 00:33:53,442
You gave me the fucking shivers!
613
00:33:54,299 --> 00:33:55,650
You know David
614
00:33:55,775 --> 00:33:59,499
if you wanted to come to my bank so I
can look at your vintage phone project...
615
00:33:59,500 --> 00:34:02,623
No, I dropped it.
3 years; no investors...
616
00:34:02,693 --> 00:34:04,826
No, I think it was complete shit!
617
00:34:04,889 --> 00:34:07,279
But, I'm onto a great thing now.
618
00:34:07,334 --> 00:34:08,689
- Ready?
- Yeah.
619
00:34:09,513 --> 00:34:11,036
Kosher, organic!
620
00:34:11,185 --> 00:34:14,255
Why'd you make slanted eyes?
It's a snowman, not Buddha!
621
00:34:14,310 --> 00:34:16,493
- That's not slanted eyes!
- Oh, sure!
622
00:34:16,518 --> 00:34:19,364
He's right. No such thing
as a Chinese snowman!
623
00:34:19,399 --> 00:34:21,728
While we're at it,
in that case...
624
00:34:23,514 --> 00:34:25,895
I'd give him a *kippa!
(yarmulke)
625
00:34:26,827 --> 00:34:29,620
I'd give him a beard,
for no reason at all.
626
00:34:32,426 --> 00:34:35,013
- Snow ball fight?
- Seriously? -Yeah.
627
00:34:35,364 --> 00:34:37,482
With an Arab?! Are you nuts?
628
00:34:37,567 --> 00:34:38,941
It's cold guys, no.
629
00:34:38,997 --> 00:34:40,255
It's on!
630
00:34:40,511 --> 00:34:41,833
Oh, damn!
631
00:34:45,247 --> 00:34:47,380
- Wait!
- Him first!
632
00:34:48,608 --> 00:34:50,521
- Come on! C'mon!
- C'mon!
633
00:34:51,232 --> 00:34:52,287
C'mon!
634
00:34:52,341 --> 00:34:54,404
*Allahu Akbar!
(God is great)
635
00:34:55,734 --> 00:34:56,828
Oh!
636
00:34:57,593 --> 00:35:00,584
Nothing serious Rachid,
it reminds him his youth!
637
00:35:00,609 --> 00:35:02,917
- Right Claude?
- Yes, excellent.
638
00:35:03,040 --> 00:35:06,128
We came to get you, Chao
we're leaving for Mass.
639
00:35:06,153 --> 00:35:07,353
Coming.
640
00:35:14,641 --> 00:35:15,738
Never mind.
641
00:35:16,122 --> 00:35:17,414
You're going to Mass?
642
00:35:17,445 --> 00:35:20,950
-Sure guys, gotta be open minded!
- What a Chinaman!
643
00:35:21,096 --> 00:35:23,231
Chief of the ball-lickers!
644
00:35:32,778 --> 00:35:36,458
Look who's here, the
United Colors of Benetton family!
645
00:35:36,520 --> 00:35:38,745
I'm so pleased you all came.
646
00:35:38,963 --> 00:35:41,641
Well it's important
for you Catholics!
647
00:35:41,690 --> 00:35:44,193
We're so glad to share
it with the family.
648
00:35:44,218 --> 00:35:47,800
- Exactly. Our religions are cousins.
- Exactly Rachid!
649
00:35:47,933 --> 00:35:50,269
And they call ME ball-licker!
650
00:35:51,706 --> 00:35:53,360
Claude! Claude!
651
00:35:54,355 --> 00:35:55,583
Claude!
652
00:35:55,957 --> 00:35:58,353
Ah, good evening, Jean-Jérôme!
653
00:35:58,752 --> 00:36:00,324
Good evening, Clotilde!
654
00:36:00,416 --> 00:36:01,822
"Jean-Jérôme" ?!
655
00:36:01,861 --> 00:36:04,510
Won't you introuduce
your sons in law? - Huh?
656
00:36:04,557 --> 00:36:06,950
We weren't invited
to their weddings.
657
00:36:06,997 --> 00:36:08,966
We'll get acquainted
later, Jean-Jé.
658
00:36:09,023 --> 00:36:13,669
I'm afraid there'll be no more room
for us in the church. Go go go!
659
00:36:13,818 --> 00:36:16,511
Charles, you must
be wary of whites
660
00:36:16,574 --> 00:36:18,254
especially the French.
661
00:36:18,370 --> 00:36:21,378
The French are bad and stupid.
662
00:36:21,482 --> 00:36:22,813
I know what I'm saying.
663
00:36:22,838 --> 00:36:27,947
When I was in the 3rd Regimental Infantry
Marine. My whole career, they oppressed me!
664
00:36:27,948 --> 00:36:31,669
If I wasn't black I'd be General,
not Adjutant!
665
00:36:31,732 --> 00:36:33,458
Change your broken record!
666
00:36:33,505 --> 00:36:36,349
It's not the whites,
it's your filthy carachter!
667
00:36:36,396 --> 00:36:39,167
No matter if they were
yellow, black or red,
668
00:36:39,235 --> 00:36:41,524
you never got on
with your superiors!
669
00:36:41,621 --> 00:36:44,019
Accelerate, or we'll
miss the Mass!
670
00:36:44,060 --> 00:36:50,080
Charles, do you know the French make a
dessert they call 'Tête de Nègre'? (Negro-head)
671
00:36:50,166 --> 00:36:52,818
No, papa, not anymore,
it's been banned.
672
00:36:52,861 --> 00:36:56,115
Hmm! I'm sure it still exists,
they love it!
673
00:36:56,208 --> 00:36:58,732
I know a cake called
"Le congolais" .
674
00:36:58,793 --> 00:37:01,027
Knock it off, with your cakes!
675
00:37:01,075 --> 00:37:05,003
He is born, the Heav'nly Child
♪ Il est né le divin enfant,
676
00:37:05,104 --> 00:37:09,182
Let all sing His nativity.
♪ Chantons tous son avènement.
677
00:37:09,268 --> 00:37:13,422
'Tis four thousand years and more,
♪ Depuis plus de quatre mille ans
678
00:37:13,523 --> 00:37:17,781
Prophets have foretold His coming,
♪ Nous le promettaient les prophètes,
679
00:37:17,914 --> 00:37:22,162
'Tis four thousand years and more,
♪ Depuis plus de quatre mille ans
680
00:37:22,255 --> 00:37:27,003
Have we waited this happy hour.
♪ Nous attendions cet heureux temps.
681
00:37:27,521 --> 00:37:31,591
He is born, the Heav'nly Child.
♪ Il est né le divin enfant,
682
00:37:31,722 --> 00:37:36,368
Let all sing His nativity.
♪ Chantons tous son avènement
683
00:37:36,587 --> 00:37:41,087
Ah, how lovely, Ah, how fair,
♪ Ah, qu'il est beau, qu'il est
charmant!
684
00:37:41,120 --> 00:37:45,462
What perfection is His grace,
♪ Ah, que ses grâces sont
parfaites!
685
00:37:45,641 --> 00:37:50,039
Ah, how lovely, Ah, how fair,
♪ Ah, qu'il est beau, qu'il est
charmant!
686
00:37:50,109 --> 00:37:55,075
Child divine, so gentle there.
♪ Qu'il est doux ce divin enfant!
687
00:38:02,779 --> 00:38:04,406
Yeah, I'm really happy!
688
00:38:04,918 --> 00:38:07,684
A family torn apart, is so sad!
689
00:38:08,018 --> 00:38:10,831
Don't worry darling Momy's fine!
690
00:38:20,700 --> 00:38:23,083
- Who can it be?
- No idea.
691
00:38:24,167 --> 00:38:27,372
Can you open the door
Laure please? - Yes.
692
00:38:34,317 --> 00:38:36,417
Xavier Dupuy-Jambard?!
693
00:38:36,508 --> 00:38:38,599
Merry Christmas Laure!
694
00:38:39,637 --> 00:38:42,321
What are you doing here?
Aren't you in Washington?
695
00:38:42,385 --> 00:38:44,060
Nope! Back for the holidays.
696
00:38:44,124 --> 00:38:46,430
Claude, look who's here!
697
00:38:47,395 --> 00:38:50,141
Oh, Xavier, what a
great surprise!
698
00:38:50,615 --> 00:38:54,185
- (My God, he's ugly!)
- Xavier you look in great shape!
699
00:38:54,247 --> 00:38:56,279
That's the great
American outdoors!
700
00:38:56,310 --> 00:38:59,283
Did you know Xavier worked
in a bank in Washington?
701
00:38:59,308 --> 00:39:02,175
- A pension fund.
- Remarkable! Even better!
702
00:39:02,200 --> 00:39:04,747
People like you run
the world, Xavier.
703
00:39:05,275 --> 00:39:07,887
Come in. Green tea, or Black?
704
00:39:07,973 --> 00:39:09,113
Black.
705
00:39:09,203 --> 00:39:11,953
What a nice, impromptu visit!
706
00:39:15,304 --> 00:39:18,990
So Laure what do you do for a living?
- I work for LCI News.
707
00:39:19,068 --> 00:39:21,692
- Not surprising.
- Why?
708
00:39:21,756 --> 00:39:25,005
All the LCI's
reporters are gorgeous.
709
00:39:27,208 --> 00:39:30,300
- I'm in Legal Services.
- Ah! - Hm!
710
00:39:35,763 --> 00:39:39,099
- Who are these people?
- Hm? What people?
711
00:39:40,138 --> 00:39:42,127
Are they your gardeners?
712
00:39:42,831 --> 00:39:46,130
You got them to work
on the 25th of December?
713
00:39:46,209 --> 00:39:49,394
Actually they're our
sons-in-law. - Yes, voila!
714
00:39:49,497 --> 00:39:50,534
- Ah...
715
00:39:50,589 --> 00:39:53,681
Excuse me, how stupid.
I thought they...
716
00:39:54,189 --> 00:39:56,002
No harm done.
717
00:39:56,728 --> 00:39:59,468
So you work in legal services?
718
00:39:59,898 --> 00:40:01,812
Yes, as I just told you.
719
00:40:01,900 --> 00:40:03,888
Yes, that's what I heard.
720
00:40:07,358 --> 00:40:09,943
- I don't see it!
- Keep looking!
721
00:40:11,944 --> 00:40:16,130
There, I see it now! Charles Koffi,
my big brother!
722
00:40:16,208 --> 00:40:17,473
That's your name!
723
00:40:17,537 --> 00:40:20,640
What do you think? I play Pontagnac!
The lead role!
724
00:40:20,679 --> 00:40:22,982
I hope you're not
playing the turkey.
725
00:40:23,031 --> 00:40:25,232
You mustn't ridicule us!
726
00:40:32,219 --> 00:40:36,195
- Charles your Dad wants to talk to you.
- Oh? I didn't do anything!
727
00:40:36,234 --> 00:40:38,859
I had a chat with your mother
728
00:40:38,957 --> 00:40:41,841
and as usual,
she agreed with me.
729
00:40:45,450 --> 00:40:48,663
Charles we accept the wedding!
730
00:40:49,216 --> 00:40:50,661
Thanks papa, it's...
731
00:40:50,779 --> 00:40:53,036
Hold on, I have 3 conditions.
732
00:40:53,171 --> 00:40:55,904
First:... the wedding
will be in France,
733
00:40:55,990 --> 00:40:58,060
- in early July.
- Why early July?
734
00:40:58,107 --> 00:41:01,816
'Cause we're going to France, then
and I already got the plane tickets.
735
00:41:01,841 --> 00:41:04,431
- I'm coming too!
- You, shut up!
736
00:41:04,615 --> 00:41:08,845
Second:... They pay for the wedding.
737
00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:13,713
It's only fair. Whites pillaged Africa.
They have to give a little back!
738
00:41:13,767 --> 00:41:17,151
Third:.. if I hear the
slightest racist remark
739
00:41:17,213 --> 00:41:19,643
from your in-laws
about blacks...
740
00:41:19,713 --> 00:41:22,050
Haha... I'll hit them!
741
00:41:22,307 --> 00:41:23,565
Huh?
742
00:41:23,698 --> 00:41:26,727
- You'll hit them?
- Correct! I'll hit them!
743
00:41:26,813 --> 00:41:30,149
You're not gonna hit anyone.
Everything will be fine.
744
00:41:30,174 --> 00:41:32,064
Laure's parents
are very tolerant
745
00:41:32,102 --> 00:41:36,505
For proof, their other 3 girls married
a Chinese, a Jew and an Arab.
746
00:41:37,294 --> 00:41:39,568
What kind of family is that?
747
00:41:39,646 --> 00:41:41,709
Are they Communists?
748
00:41:46,390 --> 00:41:47,825
They're actually nice.
749
00:41:47,879 --> 00:41:51,000
I wouldn't go on vacation
with them, but they're nice.
750
00:41:51,047 --> 00:41:54,972
May I remind you, we risk spending
every vacation with them.
751
00:41:54,997 --> 00:41:56,304
Right.
752
00:42:01,380 --> 00:42:04,325
Why are you still here?
You'll miss your train!
753
00:42:04,386 --> 00:42:07,521
I'll catch the evening train.
I need to talk to you.
754
00:42:08,831 --> 00:42:10,232
Here it is...
755
00:42:10,910 --> 00:42:12,455
I'm going to get married.
756
00:42:12,495 --> 00:42:14,801
- Already?!
- Why "already"?
757
00:42:14,826 --> 00:42:18,213
See? I knew it'd work out
perfectly with Xavier!
758
00:42:18,253 --> 00:42:19,880
No it's not Xavier.
759
00:42:19,948 --> 00:42:21,857
Forget Xavier, right off.
760
00:42:22,962 --> 00:42:25,029
What's the lucky man's name?
761
00:42:25,106 --> 00:42:26,130
Charles.
762
00:42:26,185 --> 00:42:28,075
Like Charles de Gaulle?
763
00:42:28,146 --> 00:42:29,318
Um, yeah.
764
00:42:29,536 --> 00:42:31,006
Tell me he's Catholic.
765
00:42:31,060 --> 00:42:33,033
- Huh?
- Is he Catholic?
766
00:42:33,112 --> 00:42:35,098
Yes. Yes, he's Catholic.
767
00:42:35,146 --> 00:42:37,121
So, you'll marry in a church, then?
768
00:42:37,160 --> 00:42:40,128
Certainly, his family
is very religious. - Ahh!
769
00:42:41,253 --> 00:42:44,855
But I need to let you
know something, first.
770
00:42:46,122 --> 00:42:47,583
Well he's...
771
00:42:47,913 --> 00:42:50,395
How can I put it? He's...
772
00:42:51,294 --> 00:42:52,495
Yes?
773
00:42:52,628 --> 00:42:54,324
He's an actor.
774
00:42:54,410 --> 00:42:56,627
That's not important!
775
00:42:56,898 --> 00:42:58,724
We couldn't care less!
776
00:42:58,841 --> 00:43:01,591
Oh, totally!
It's not a stupid job!
777
00:43:02,865 --> 00:43:06,200
- Can I give you a hug?
- If you want, mama!
778
00:43:06,403 --> 00:43:07,934
Ah, my darlings!
779
00:43:08,380 --> 00:43:12,050
We'll do it on the first of July!
Your father and I married on that date.
780
00:43:12,051 --> 00:43:13,372
It's a GREAT date!
781
00:43:13,435 --> 00:43:15,245
Gotta reserve the church now!
782
00:43:15,308 --> 00:43:17,652
- Lots of weddings in July.
- We'll have Father Degas do it.
783
00:43:17,691 --> 00:43:19,931
Wait, you haven't even met him!
784
00:43:19,962 --> 00:43:22,564
Well, obviously,
we must meet him!
785
00:43:22,714 --> 00:43:25,940
Yes, when will you
introduce your Charles?
786
00:43:26,004 --> 00:43:27,386
Well... soon!
787
00:43:27,432 --> 00:43:30,935
He's on a long tour
abroad with his play.
788
00:43:31,137 --> 00:43:33,215
When he gets back,
I'll arrange it!
789
00:43:33,262 --> 00:43:35,003
We're overjoyed!
790
00:43:35,401 --> 00:43:37,903
Let's celebrate. Oh, Charles!
791
00:43:42,374 --> 00:43:48,539
[went off without a hitch
We'll get married in July]
792
00:43:55,029 --> 00:43:57,655
[Great date. Love you]
793
00:44:01,137 --> 00:44:02,606
One out of four.
794
00:44:02,668 --> 00:44:05,560
Given the circumstances,
we didn't do too badly!
795
00:44:05,616 --> 00:44:06,657
You're right.
796
00:44:06,682 --> 00:44:09,779
No matter how nice our in-laws
are, it's still a relief!
797
00:44:09,780 --> 00:44:13,325
I knew our little Laure
wouldn't disappoint us.
798
00:44:13,512 --> 00:44:17,137
She always had something different.
A strength!
799
00:44:17,450 --> 00:44:20,354
At the same time a fragility
800
00:44:21,221 --> 00:44:23,455
an intelligence about people.
801
00:44:23,642 --> 00:44:25,510
That's true. Yeah.
802
00:44:26,908 --> 00:44:28,865
Ah, my little girl!
803
00:44:29,482 --> 00:44:32,419
♪ [Valerie June - The Hour]
804
00:44:51,795 --> 00:44:55,469
♪ I was on my way back home
805
00:44:56,192 --> 00:44:59,561
♪ My heart was like a stone
806
00:44:59,982 --> 00:45:03,701
♪ With the stars up in the sky
807
00:45:03,944 --> 00:45:07,558
♪ As they watched us say good bye
808
00:45:08,155 --> 00:45:11,747
♪ It won't hide or disguise
809
00:45:12,583 --> 00:45:16,370
♪ My love, you cry
810
00:45:16,922 --> 00:45:20,058
♪ As we say goodbye
811
00:45:20,628 --> 00:45:23,767
♪ The time, was slow
812
00:45:24,149 --> 00:45:27,978
♪ I didn't want to see you go
813
00:45:28,323 --> 00:45:30,615
♪ Oh no,
814
00:45:32,222 --> 00:45:34,348
♪ oh no
815
00:45:37,029 --> 00:45:40,494
♪ The hour tell you no lies
816
00:45:41,388 --> 00:45:44,599
♪ The hour tell you no lies
817
00:45:44,880 --> 00:45:49,061
♪ Tell you no lies for the sky
818
00:45:49,178 --> 00:45:51,177
♪ The hour tell you no...
819
00:45:51,232 --> 00:45:52,536
This is it.
820
00:45:52,646 --> 00:45:55,324
Is my tie straight?
Boogers in my nose?
821
00:45:55,372 --> 00:45:57,810
No you're impeccable my love.
- Thanks.
822
00:45:57,835 --> 00:46:00,154
My parents will love you!
823
00:46:02,607 --> 00:46:04,099
10 minutes late.
824
00:46:04,144 --> 00:46:07,427
One thing's for sure,
he's not Chinese!
825
00:46:10,866 --> 00:46:12,966
Thank God!
826
00:46:17,028 --> 00:46:19,098
End table on the left.
827
00:46:20,511 --> 00:46:23,199
Who's this, the parking valet?
828
00:46:25,161 --> 00:46:27,568
It's not the valet.
It's him; Charles.
829
00:46:27,608 --> 00:46:28,716
- Hm?
- Yeah.
830
00:46:28,771 --> 00:46:33,052
Say, did you tell them I was Black?
They're making odd faces.
831
00:46:33,122 --> 00:46:34,779
No, I forgot.
832
00:46:35,185 --> 00:46:36,812
You can't forget that!
833
00:46:36,837 --> 00:46:39,974
Look, your father's
about to have a stroke.
834
00:46:41,140 --> 00:46:43,734
Hello Papa, hello Mama.
835
00:46:44,661 --> 00:46:46,312
This is Charles.
836
00:46:47,911 --> 00:46:51,115
You could have told me
your parents were white!
837
00:46:52,107 --> 00:46:53,566
That was humor.
838
00:46:53,591 --> 00:46:54,894
Ah, of course!
839
00:46:54,941 --> 00:46:58,722
Laure told us you're an actor,
with comedic tendencies.
840
00:46:58,784 --> 00:47:02,993
We definitely attract farce.
Our 3 other sons-in-law like jokes too.
841
00:47:03,063 --> 00:47:05,829
- We'll get along fine, then.
- You know them?
842
00:47:05,876 --> 00:47:09,466
No, Laure told me. Quite
extraordinary events in your family!
843
00:47:09,515 --> 00:47:14,450
Oh, yeah? With you, now, we have
all the colors of the rainbow!
844
00:47:16,550 --> 00:47:19,132
Lucky you don't have 5 daughters.
- Why?
845
00:47:19,157 --> 00:47:22,413
Because the 5th would
have married a Rummy!
846
00:47:23,654 --> 00:47:26,436
Ah... *Romany? (Gypsy)
847
00:47:27,911 --> 00:47:30,755
I- I like that. Very funny!
848
00:47:30,848 --> 00:47:33,216
Very 'spirited,' even.
849
00:47:39,355 --> 00:47:41,911
Apart from his haircut, he's nice.
850
00:47:42,001 --> 00:47:44,253
M-hm! And well brought up.
851
00:47:44,813 --> 00:47:49,039
- And he has a sense of humor.
- Very humorous. Plus he's handsome!
852
00:47:49,094 --> 00:47:51,504
Exactly. He has presence.
853
00:47:51,583 --> 00:47:52,872
Tall...
854
00:47:53,358 --> 00:47:54,880
sporty...
855
00:47:55,637 --> 00:47:58,341
- Laure's very beautiful too.
- Oh, yeah.
856
00:47:58,559 --> 00:48:01,693
They ought to produce
splendid hybrids.
857
00:48:05,146 --> 00:48:09,240
That's the marriage that broke the
camel's back. I can't bear up.
858
00:48:09,294 --> 00:48:12,495
- What did we do to God, Claude?
- I dunno!
859
00:48:12,915 --> 00:48:16,224
I'm in the dark darling. In
the 'Schwartz'!
860
00:48:17,075 --> 00:48:18,419
Ahh, pfft!
861
00:48:19,021 --> 00:48:22,333
- We're groping in the dark.
- Groping.
862
00:48:39,827 --> 00:48:42,646
Claude! What are you doing?
863
00:48:42,677 --> 00:48:44,872
You can see! I'm cutting wood!
864
00:48:44,912 --> 00:48:47,880
- At this hour?
- So?! It relaxes me!
865
00:48:50,871 --> 00:48:53,419
We raised them
wrong, that's all!
866
00:48:53,444 --> 00:48:57,437
Whoser fault is that?
Letting them go study in Paris! Hmph!
867
00:48:57,476 --> 00:49:01,294
- I remind you, I was against it!
- You're insinuating it's my fault?
868
00:49:01,321 --> 00:49:03,755
I'm not saying that,
but oddly, at times
869
00:49:03,786 --> 00:49:06,053
you were a bit too
lax with them.
870
00:49:06,111 --> 00:49:10,325
Oh sure! With their religious
education I was less strict.
871
00:49:10,417 --> 00:49:13,575
'Love one another':
Look at the result!
872
00:49:14,379 --> 00:49:18,723
- I'm gonna cut the big stumps!
- Go cut your big stumps!
873
00:49:20,997 --> 00:49:24,083
That's what I'm talking about.
Raised wrong!
874
00:49:24,564 --> 00:49:27,154
Alley-oop! Back to your niche.
875
00:49:31,099 --> 00:49:32,287
Claude?
876
00:49:32,997 --> 00:49:35,995
- You all right?
- Yes, fine, leave me alone.
877
00:49:35,996 --> 00:49:39,771
- You sure?
- I'm OK! Won't you ever get off my back?
878
00:49:39,874 --> 00:49:41,805
Oh my God, Ségolène!
879
00:49:42,442 --> 00:49:44,509
Well, it's no big loss.
880
00:49:44,649 --> 00:49:48,207
Excuse me Darling,
but it hurts horribly!
881
00:49:50,216 --> 00:49:54,529
African weddings are something!
You never know when they'll end.
882
00:49:54,583 --> 00:49:57,245
Our parents will never hold up.
883
00:49:57,694 --> 00:50:01,555
Lucie! Hitting your sister's
head with a rake? No!
884
00:50:02,136 --> 00:50:04,949
By now, they should be
used to mixed marriages.
885
00:50:04,974 --> 00:50:07,794
Yes but the repetitive
aspect may be too much.
886
00:50:07,880 --> 00:50:11,451
As they say in Africa
"The last chop fells the tree"
887
00:50:11,520 --> 00:50:13,052
Here she is.
888
00:50:15,247 --> 00:50:19,622
You wanted to see me? - Yes, you sly fox.
You could've told us you're getting married!
889
00:50:19,710 --> 00:50:24,389
- Why are we the last to know?
- I was going to but I was swamped!
890
00:50:25,505 --> 00:50:30,145
What's with the long faces?
What's your problem? That he's Black?
891
00:50:30,216 --> 00:50:33,191
- Oh, please!
- C'mon Laure!
892
00:50:33,245 --> 00:50:35,894
Suspecting us of racism?
Not us!
893
00:50:35,956 --> 00:50:38,714
Mama is deeply depressed.
You're going to kill her!
894
00:50:38,761 --> 00:50:42,915
Am I hallucinatng?! You set me up with your
guys, now I have to make the sacifice?!
895
00:50:42,985 --> 00:50:46,108
We're just asking you to think
twice before committing yourself.
896
00:50:46,174 --> 00:50:50,082
You're their last hope to have a proper
son-in-law... According to their criteria.
897
00:50:50,107 --> 00:50:53,491
Oh, yeah? At least mine is Catholic!
898
00:50:59,544 --> 00:51:02,646
He decided to cut all the
trees on our property.
899
00:51:02,786 --> 00:51:05,729
- Says they distress him
- Trees distress him?
900
00:51:05,807 --> 00:51:09,058
Talk to him, Isabelle.
I can't take any more.
901
00:51:09,589 --> 00:51:11,321
I'm going to lie down.
902
00:51:11,472 --> 00:51:13,628
Mom, it's 5 pm!
903
00:51:13,777 --> 00:51:15,290
Already?
904
00:51:15,454 --> 00:51:16,931
Time flies.
905
00:51:23,161 --> 00:51:24,723
With a chain saw?! -
906
00:51:24,800 --> 00:51:27,636
He's razing everything.
It's like the Amazon!
907
00:51:27,661 --> 00:51:31,091
- Mom is still in bed?
- Still... Doesn't even go to Mass.
908
00:51:31,138 --> 00:51:34,720
This IS serious! The only time she
missed Mass it was when I was born!
909
00:51:34,721 --> 00:51:37,857
For our trip to Venice, she
cancelled babysitting Benjamin.
910
00:51:37,882 --> 00:51:42,919
Let's lift the veil off our eyes. This black man,
clearly threatens the family's equilibrium.
911
00:51:42,950 --> 00:51:46,596
True! And just when we'd
found a certain harmony!
912
00:51:46,651 --> 00:51:49,596
Know what? It reminds of
"Saving Private Ryan".
913
00:51:49,665 --> 00:51:52,047
3 brothers die in battle
and they send the army
914
00:51:52,072 --> 00:51:54,329
to save the 4th and
return him to his family.
915
00:51:54,330 --> 00:51:57,607
Here we have 3 French women, of pure stock,
married to sons of immigrants
916
00:51:57,632 --> 00:52:00,993
- We must stop the 4th from doing the same.
- You compare our marriages to war?!
917
00:52:00,994 --> 00:52:06,159
It's an image... 3 wogs plus one black,
for your parents it's Fukushima!
918
00:52:06,255 --> 00:52:09,138
Sweet France
♪ Douce France
919
00:52:09,638 --> 00:52:13,263
Dear land of my childhood
♪ Cher pays de mon enfance
920
00:52:14,006 --> 00:52:18,036
Cradled in tender insouciance
♪ Bercée de tendre insouciance
921
00:52:18,276 --> 00:52:22,409
I keep you in my heart
♪ Je t'ai gardée dans mon cœur!
922
00:52:23,653 --> 00:52:25,818
My village
♪ Mon village
923
00:52:26,160 --> 00:52:29,916
with it's bell tower and sober houses
♪ au clocher aux maisons sages
924
00:52:29,951 --> 00:52:34,587
Yesterday I had a dream which no doubt
is connected to my problem.
925
00:52:34,727 --> 00:52:36,724
M-hm! I'm listening.
926
00:52:37,185 --> 00:52:41,116
OK, I was taking two black
babies in a stroller
927
00:52:41,584 --> 00:52:42,937
and like...
928
00:52:44,061 --> 00:52:45,528
I was ashamed.
929
00:52:45,601 --> 00:52:47,190
M-hm! What else?
930
00:52:47,284 --> 00:52:50,151
I wasn't ashamed of my
black grandchildren.
931
00:52:50,184 --> 00:52:52,682
But because people
took me for a nanny
932
00:52:52,725 --> 00:52:55,276
at the Gabon embassy.
M-hmm!
933
00:52:56,081 --> 00:52:59,516
- Do you think I'm racist?
- What do you think?
934
00:53:06,514 --> 00:53:10,369
I have an idea.
We'll discredit Charles!
935
00:53:11,075 --> 00:53:13,044
Surely, he has some faults.
936
00:53:13,114 --> 00:53:16,599
I know my black cousins they're oversexed.
Their Achilles' heel are women.
937
00:53:16,639 --> 00:53:21,208
What a cliché! Not all blacks are sex addicts.
- Go to a Caribbean Club and see.
938
00:53:21,252 --> 00:53:23,833
First he's not Caribbean he's African.
It's strictly different.
939
00:53:23,858 --> 00:53:26,333
It may be a
'Green Card' marriage.
940
00:53:26,372 --> 00:53:27,771
Africans do that a lot.
941
00:53:27,796 --> 00:53:31,490
- Not the Chinese?
- He happens not to be yellow, but black.
942
00:53:31,560 --> 00:53:35,089
Lucky thing too! I don't want another
Chinese in the family!
943
00:53:35,135 --> 00:53:39,366
Same here, I couldn't accept a second Arab. Especially a Moroccan!
944
00:53:39,458 --> 00:53:41,064
I understand that.
945
00:53:41,197 --> 00:53:43,078
An Ashkenazi...
946
00:53:43,958 --> 00:53:45,757
I'd kill him!
947
00:53:50,118 --> 00:53:52,475
Monsieur, I'll hear no more.
Leave!
948
00:53:52,500 --> 00:53:55,125
No Madame, anything but that!
I love you.
949
00:53:55,164 --> 00:53:57,856
The moment I saw you
it was love at first sight!
950
00:53:57,897 --> 00:54:00,904
I tailed you for 8 days.
Did you notice? - No Monsieur.
951
00:54:00,968 --> 00:54:05,380
Oh yes! A woman always notices
being followed.- Oh, how fatuous!
952
00:54:05,462 --> 00:54:08,395
Odd; a black guy in a
Feydeau play.
953
00:54:08,552 --> 00:54:10,357
It's modern.
954
00:54:10,552 --> 00:54:12,943
What's modern about a black guy?
955
00:54:12,975 --> 00:54:17,613
Dunno, last time I was in
a theater I was 5. At a puppet show.
956
00:54:18,347 --> 00:54:20,848
Check out the Chinese guy.
957
00:54:24,115 --> 00:54:27,358
I don't believe how childish..!
- Shh!
958
00:54:28,341 --> 00:54:31,028
OK, Rachid calm down!
- Sorry...
959
00:54:31,089 --> 00:54:33,589
- Rachid.
- Forget it!
960
00:54:35,184 --> 00:54:36,263
Watch!
961
00:54:36,319 --> 00:54:38,365
I'm sure he fucks the redhead!
962
00:54:38,411 --> 00:54:41,546
-Anyway, 'love above all'!
- Fine! - You'll keep your word?
963
00:54:41,581 --> 00:54:43,462
Look how intimate they are!
964
00:54:43,516 --> 00:54:46,503
- They're actors, they're acting!
- It's beyond acting, look!
965
00:54:46,552 --> 00:54:48,325
Do you swear to do as you say?
966
00:54:48,365 --> 00:54:50,636
And dump him if you have the proof?
967
00:54:50,682 --> 00:54:53,532
- Yes, immediately.
- Oh joy! Proof, I have!
968
00:54:53,741 --> 00:54:55,594
I gotta take a dump.
969
00:54:57,138 --> 00:54:59,552
What's he doing?
It's been an hour!
970
00:54:59,591 --> 00:55:02,146
He's porking the redhead,
backstage!
971
00:55:02,190 --> 00:55:05,927
I'm proud of you!
You act very well.
972
00:55:07,216 --> 00:55:08,462
Charles Koffi!
973
00:55:08,510 --> 00:55:11,953
He fucked the redhead,
and he's still not satisfied!
974
00:55:12,008 --> 00:55:14,313
These blacks are
Sex Machines!
975
00:55:14,361 --> 00:55:16,875
Come on, we've trapped
our 'cousin'!
976
00:55:16,967 --> 00:55:19,332
Ah, I love Paris,
it's so beautiful!
977
00:55:19,380 --> 00:55:20,906
Ah, so beautiful!
978
00:55:33,578 --> 00:55:35,748
... jealous, huh?
979
00:55:35,881 --> 00:55:38,967
You're a chatterbox, Viviane.
Come on, off to bed!
980
00:55:39,043 --> 00:55:40,666
We have him dead in the water!
981
00:55:40,691 --> 00:55:42,075
- Shoot!
- OK.
982
00:55:44,006 --> 00:55:46,287
Go on, shoot, shoot, shoot!
983
00:55:56,932 --> 00:55:58,778
I feel sorry for you, Laurette.
984
00:55:58,818 --> 00:56:02,036
I know it's not easy, but
you must face reality.
985
00:56:02,068 --> 00:56:03,880
I warned you about blacks.
986
00:56:03,905 --> 00:56:07,245
Are you TOYALLY crazy?
It's his sister!
987
00:56:09,572 --> 00:56:12,250
- That's his sister?
- Yes, his sister Vivianne.
988
00:56:12,287 --> 00:56:14,484
He invited her for
a week in Paris!
989
00:56:14,509 --> 00:56:15,547
Ha ha! Pardon.
990
00:56:15,593 --> 00:56:17,437
That's REAL funny!
991
00:56:21,044 --> 00:56:22,794
(Fuck) His sister!
992
00:56:23,416 --> 00:56:26,201
Between mom and dad
turning into zombies
993
00:56:26,267 --> 00:56:28,615
and you trying to break us up...
994
00:56:28,712 --> 00:56:31,138
I'm about to crack!
995
00:56:32,434 --> 00:56:34,802
There, I'm cracking now!
996
00:56:34,912 --> 00:56:36,262
Aw, sweety!
997
00:56:36,465 --> 00:56:38,395
We'll help you, I promise, OK?
998
00:56:38,441 --> 00:56:43,194
We'll make sure you have the best
wedding of the family!
999
00:56:43,358 --> 00:56:48,509
This morning, walking along the Loire River
I saw a small field mouse. - M-hm! I'm listening.
1000
00:56:48,546 --> 00:56:51,979
I remembered, as a child I was
scared stiff of field mice.
1001
00:56:52,032 --> 00:56:55,474
-Yet, they're cute and inoffensive.
- M-hm... Continue.
1002
00:56:55,513 --> 00:57:00,622
I was wondering if my fear of the Other,
of the Unknown may come from that.
1003
00:57:00,685 --> 00:57:04,068
I may have repressed my
irrational fear of field mice,
1004
00:57:04,093 --> 00:57:07,597
and it transferred itself
onto foreigners.
1005
00:57:09,310 --> 00:57:10,800
Think it's possible?
1006
00:57:10,894 --> 00:57:12,882
What do you think about it?
1007
00:57:13,099 --> 00:57:15,122
- Field mice?
- Field mice, yes.
1008
00:57:15,147 --> 00:57:18,661
If I understand correctly, your
racism comes from field mice?
1009
00:57:18,724 --> 00:57:20,857
Not racism; fear of the unknown!
1010
00:57:20,919 --> 00:57:23,229
- Yeah, right...
- This shrink is great.
1011
00:57:23,254 --> 00:57:26,418
Doesn't talk much, but
I'm making giant leaps forward.
1012
00:57:26,443 --> 00:57:30,116
Yeah, you compare our sons-in-law to
rats and you think you're better.
1013
00:57:30,148 --> 00:57:32,323
Not rats, field mice!
They're cute!
1014
00:57:32,348 --> 00:57:36,013
They're still rats.
I'm fed up with this nonsense!
1015
00:57:36,060 --> 00:57:38,880
And stop spitting on
those photos!
1016
00:57:42,281 --> 00:57:46,677
Say, I read your proposal; Bio Mitzvah.
Actually, I like it!
1017
00:57:46,794 --> 00:57:48,075
- Really, Chao?
- Yeah.
1018
00:57:48,138 --> 00:57:49,607
Think it has potential?
1019
00:57:49,650 --> 00:57:52,896
Yeah, but 600,000 Jews,
is too small a market.
1020
00:57:52,974 --> 00:57:55,062
Why don't you make
Organic Halal?
1021
00:57:55,101 --> 00:57:58,206
You nuts? I can't sell Halal
my mom'll kill me!
1022
00:57:58,261 --> 00:58:00,919
5 Million Muslims... think about it!
1023
00:58:01,068 --> 00:58:02,260
Yeah...
1024
00:58:04,651 --> 00:58:05,690
Ah!
1025
00:58:05,854 --> 00:58:07,913
That must be the lovers.
1026
00:58:08,040 --> 00:58:09,393
- Hello!
- Hello!
1027
00:58:09,429 --> 00:58:11,261
Hello, hello!
1028
00:58:14,513 --> 00:58:16,255
The paparazzi!
1029
00:58:16,312 --> 00:58:17,434
Hello
1030
00:58:17,632 --> 00:58:19,044
Hello Charles...
1031
00:58:19,351 --> 00:58:20,601
Happy Sunday!
1032
00:58:20,651 --> 00:58:24,201
So you don't want any
blacks in the family?
1033
00:58:24,614 --> 00:58:27,359
- I'll put this to cool.
- I'll help you.
1034
00:58:28,961 --> 00:58:30,875
You know the family situation.
1035
00:58:30,907 --> 00:58:33,185
- It's not about racism.
- A bit, I think!
1036
00:58:33,210 --> 00:58:34,962
Drop it, there's no excuse.
1037
00:58:34,985 --> 00:58:37,521
Sorry Charles, we behaved
like assholes.
1038
00:58:37,622 --> 00:58:38,999
No big deal, I understand.
1039
00:58:39,044 --> 00:58:41,605
It's only human not to
want to share the pie
1040
00:58:41,630 --> 00:58:43,513
- with your colored brother.
- Aw, no! - It's not that!!
1041
00:58:43,538 --> 00:58:47,044
- So, WE're the pie?
- No honey, it's an image. Let's drop it.
1042
00:58:47,131 --> 00:58:50,466
So who's who? Let me guess...
You're easy.
1043
00:58:50,519 --> 00:58:52,216
- Chao, I imagine.
- Yes.
1044
00:58:52,270 --> 00:58:54,365
Look at that face! - What?
1045
00:58:55,200 --> 00:58:57,154
You two are harder.
1046
00:58:57,310 --> 00:59:01,552
Nothing resembles a Semite
more than another Semite.
1047
00:59:02,013 --> 00:59:04,919
Hm, I'd guess...
David and Rachid!
1048
00:59:04,982 --> 00:59:06,917
- On the nose.
- Yeah, that's right.
1049
00:59:07,387 --> 00:59:10,310
Welcome to the family!
- Thanks.
1050
00:59:17,649 --> 00:59:20,032
Claude, Claude, Claude!
1051
00:59:23,122 --> 00:59:25,341
Don't tell me, you're going fishing?
- Yes.
1052
00:59:25,388 --> 00:59:27,415
Charles and Laure
are waiting!
1053
00:59:27,440 --> 00:59:31,013
Settle it without me.
My presence isn't necessary.
1054
00:59:31,052 --> 00:59:34,232
Claude it's important for
your daughter and for us!
1055
00:59:34,257 --> 00:59:35,489
What's gotten into you?
1056
00:59:35,514 --> 00:59:38,061
This marriage fills you
with joy, now?! - Yes.
1057
00:59:38,099 --> 00:59:40,560
It's 2013, Claude,
the world's changed;
1058
00:59:40,607 --> 00:59:43,747
You need to be tolerant.
Open to the world. Listen to others!
1059
00:59:43,827 --> 00:59:45,974
You're scaring me Marie.
1060
00:59:46,118 --> 00:59:47,973
Really scaring me!
1061
00:59:50,408 --> 00:59:52,164
Ah, your parents!
1062
00:59:52,929 --> 00:59:54,755
I meant to tell you...
1063
00:59:54,865 --> 00:59:57,946
I may have exaggerated
the "open door" Africa.
1064
00:59:57,971 --> 00:59:59,723
"Humanity above all" etc...
1065
00:59:59,765 --> 01:00:02,168
- Will you be clear?
- Yes, yes!
1066
01:00:02,771 --> 01:00:05,449
Clearly...
my father is like yours.
1067
01:00:05,488 --> 01:00:07,818
Except, in black. C'mon!
1068
01:00:08,651 --> 01:00:09,641
Hello, hello!
1069
01:00:10,016 --> 01:00:12,315
Hello Madame, hello Monsieur.
1070
01:00:12,316 --> 01:00:15,422
- Hey Laure, you OK?
- Great, and you, Vivianne?
1071
01:00:15,470 --> 01:00:17,040
Get back!
1072
01:00:17,102 --> 01:00:20,727
Your parents aren't there.
We'd said 18:00 hours, no?
1073
01:00:20,799 --> 01:00:22,696
Ah, there they sre!
1074
01:00:22,901 --> 01:00:25,727
Come, sit.
We'll stand behind you.
1075
01:00:31,193 --> 01:00:35,616
Hello, delighted to finally
meet you M. and Mme Koffi.
1076
01:00:35,717 --> 01:00:38,052
We too are delighted!
1077
01:00:38,138 --> 01:00:40,122
- Right André?
- M-hm!
1078
01:00:40,482 --> 01:00:44,231
Where shall we start; the meal?
A traditional feast, no?
1079
01:00:44,287 --> 01:00:45,781
Traditional, meaning...?
1080
01:00:45,868 --> 01:00:48,205
Well, French; we're in France.
1081
01:00:48,318 --> 01:00:51,050
- Why not African traditional?
- Pardon?
1082
01:00:51,109 --> 01:00:54,652
Let's mix it up, African appetizer
and French main course!
1083
01:00:54,677 --> 01:00:57,332
That's great!
In the image of our union.
1084
01:00:57,396 --> 01:01:02,866
Ok. But an African main course.
Not enough substance in white dishes!
1085
01:01:03,450 --> 01:01:07,044
Evidently you don't know
the Cassoulet Monsieur!
1086
01:01:07,115 --> 01:01:09,849
I know Cassoulet
perfectly well, Monsieur,
1087
01:01:09,943 --> 01:01:12,779
and I maintain,
there's nothing to eat there!
1088
01:01:12,818 --> 01:01:17,271
Don't take that wrong Claude, but
at African weddings, we really eat a lot.
1089
01:01:17,333 --> 01:01:20,700
We'll need to feed all our cousins.
1090
01:01:20,759 --> 01:01:23,154
All cousins? How many will there be?
1091
01:01:23,208 --> 01:01:26,716
If you count the ones in France,
and here in Abidjan
1092
01:01:26,741 --> 01:01:31,209
the Traoré in Germany, the Coulibaly
in Italy it'll be about 400.
1093
01:01:31,365 --> 01:01:35,195
- Papa we don't need to invite everybody!
- Ashamed of your family?
1094
01:01:35,220 --> 01:01:39,247
- No but I don't even know the Traoré!
- Who are these Coulibaly?
1095
01:01:39,349 --> 01:01:41,927
You... shut up!
1096
01:01:42,857 --> 01:01:45,542
For us, Monsieur,
family is important!
1097
01:01:45,620 --> 01:01:49,035
For us too. Very, important,
what do you think?
1098
01:01:49,160 --> 01:01:52,132
400 people will be
complicated to lodge.
1099
01:01:52,157 --> 01:01:54,306
There are few hotels around.
1100
01:01:54,658 --> 01:01:58,011
My son told me you have
a large property, no?
1101
01:01:58,066 --> 01:02:00,943
Do you imagine it's the
Chateau de Chambord?
1102
01:02:00,997 --> 01:02:02,560
No, not possible!
1103
01:02:02,661 --> 01:02:05,286
Unless we pitch tents
in the garden.
1104
01:02:05,388 --> 01:02:07,841
- Why not 'grass huts'?
- Papa!..
1105
01:02:07,927 --> 01:02:10,973
At Rachid's wedding
they were numerous too
1106
01:02:11,025 --> 01:02:13,043
we put tents in the garden.
1107
01:02:13,105 --> 01:02:14,863
It was very charming!
1108
01:02:14,926 --> 01:02:17,908
Rachid? They're Bedouins,
they're use to it.
1109
01:02:17,933 --> 01:02:21,166
But here, in Abidjan we sleep
in solid houses!
1110
01:02:23,825 --> 01:02:27,380
- How do we organize it financially?
- We'll see to that later!
1111
01:02:27,427 --> 01:02:30,777
No, I prefer to talk about it now!
Just to be clear.
1112
01:02:30,825 --> 01:02:33,029
What, don't you trust us?
1113
01:02:33,396 --> 01:02:35,190
OK, that's enough papa.
1114
01:02:35,228 --> 01:02:39,937
- Let's talk about something else.
- Good idea. Let's talk about the dancing.
1115
01:02:40,005 --> 01:02:44,045
I hope you like Coupé-Décalé,
M. Verneuil.
1116
01:02:44,230 --> 01:02:47,148
I don't know what that is.
Unfortunately.
1117
01:02:48,037 --> 01:02:52,230
♪ Coupé, Décalé,
Coupé Décalé...
1118
01:02:54,722 --> 01:02:58,027
♪ Coupé, Décalé,
Coupé Décalé...
1119
01:02:58,826 --> 01:03:00,480
What's he doing?
1120
01:03:00,871 --> 01:03:02,933
Making up his own dance.
- Huh?
1121
01:03:03,035 --> 01:03:05,286
Making up his own dance.
1122
01:03:07,810 --> 01:03:09,919
This looks promising...
1123
01:03:11,430 --> 01:03:15,047
With 400 gatecrashers and
Idi Amin Dada won't pay?
1124
01:03:15,072 --> 01:03:18,460
- He said we'll see, later.
- Later? I know the scam!
1125
01:03:18,514 --> 01:03:21,896
Will he pay, in CFA Francs?
(1 € = 656 CFA)
1126
01:03:21,935 --> 01:03:26,380
No, no I won't yield over money.
It's a question of principle!
1127
01:03:26,976 --> 01:03:32,454
Where are you going? - To sleep on the sofa,
I've had enough of your racist comments.
1128
01:03:32,479 --> 01:03:36,423
Oh, is that so? Go play with your
field mice, crazy, old woman.
1129
01:03:36,448 --> 01:03:38,651
I heard that, Fascist.
1130
01:03:39,679 --> 01:03:42,159
Leftist Catholic!
1131
01:03:46,038 --> 01:03:49,671
I didn't like how that white
man looked down his nose.
1132
01:03:49,762 --> 01:03:53,442
Did you see his suspicious look
when we talked about money?
1133
01:03:53,505 --> 01:03:54,824
I'm warning you,
1134
01:03:54,849 --> 01:03:57,027
if you ruin my son's marriage,
1135
01:03:57,084 --> 01:03:58,778
I'm going on strike!
1136
01:03:59,715 --> 01:04:02,896
- On strike?
- On strike!
1137
01:04:07,614 --> 01:04:11,809
I have his number. My father'll do
anything to torpedo this wedding.
1138
01:04:11,849 --> 01:04:13,829
Mine too, it'll be a disaster.
1139
01:04:14,115 --> 01:04:16,686
We should've done a Civil Union.
1140
01:04:18,130 --> 01:04:21,500
[Wednesday July 2nd. 3 days before wedding]
1140
01:04:19,135 --> 01:04:22,503
{\an5}So... I imagined a
white rose laneway going
1141
01:04:22,569 --> 01:04:27,036
from here.. to there, with
multicolored wreaths scattered about?
1142
01:04:27,083 --> 01:04:28,482
What do yo think?
1143
01:04:28,520 --> 01:04:30,427
You have carte blanche, Gérald.
1144
01:04:30,452 --> 01:04:33,333
This wedding has to be
the best day of her life!
1145
01:04:33,378 --> 01:04:36,499
It will be. The shed's ugly
it's gotta go!
1146
01:04:41,068 --> 01:04:43,069
What are you doing, Josianne?
1147
01:04:43,094 --> 01:04:47,020
Madame asked me to prepare
your room for the guests.
1148
01:04:47,185 --> 01:04:49,786
What's this about our room?
1149
01:04:50,005 --> 01:04:54,849
Nothing! If the Koffis had us over,
in Africa, they'd have done the same!
1150
01:04:54,935 --> 01:04:59,331
My bed, my daughter, what's next?
My *blue credit card?
1151
01:05:08,658 --> 01:05:10,752
He's wearing a 'boubou' kaftan!
1152
01:05:10,831 --> 01:05:13,220
So? - He always wears
a business suit.
1153
01:05:13,245 --> 01:05:16,103
I'm sure it's to provoke
your Dad! - No.
1154
01:05:16,191 --> 01:05:18,285
Air France, never again!
1155
01:05:18,755 --> 01:05:21,708
- See, what a monster?
- Didn't even say hello!
1156
01:05:21,771 --> 01:05:22,771
What's with him?
1157
01:05:22,818 --> 01:05:25,365
He created a scandal because
they wouldn't upgrade him.
1158
01:05:25,427 --> 01:05:26,559
He bought a Business fare?
1159
01:05:26,584 --> 01:05:31,074
No, once they upgraded him by
mistake, now he wants it every time!
1160
01:05:31,224 --> 01:05:33,066
I can't stand your father!
1161
01:05:33,091 --> 01:05:36,348
35 years with him, mama,
makes you a saint!
1162
01:05:37,017 --> 01:05:41,308
Even more beautiful in real life!
Come to my arms, daughter!
1163
01:05:45,435 --> 01:05:48,629
The slightest comment,
I'll bash him!
1164
01:05:49,423 --> 01:05:51,878
Papa, please...
be cool for once!
1165
01:05:51,927 --> 01:05:54,704
Do you take me for an Uncle 'Ben'?
1166
01:05:56,126 --> 01:05:58,847
Voila, a little snack
before dinner.
1167
01:05:58,965 --> 01:06:02,875
- Thanks Mme Verneuil.
- Call me Marie, Madeleine.
1168
01:06:03,534 --> 01:06:05,448
We prepared our
bedroom for you.
1169
01:06:05,479 --> 01:06:07,964
- Best room in the house.
- You shouldn't have!
1170
01:06:08,003 --> 01:06:10,284
It's fine, we're in
the same family, now!
1171
01:06:10,323 --> 01:06:12,619
Well, not yet, anyway.
1172
01:06:14,568 --> 01:06:17,122
I hope your room
is not too humid,
1173
01:06:17,177 --> 01:06:19,335
because, I can't stand humidity.
1174
01:06:19,368 --> 01:06:21,827
Oh, very humid, and moldy!
1175
01:06:21,913 --> 01:06:25,366
If you prefer, you can find
a hotel south of the Loire,
1176
01:06:25,391 --> 01:06:27,712
the climate's drier, there.
1177
01:06:30,251 --> 01:06:32,296
OK, concerning the banquet.
1178
01:06:32,351 --> 01:06:34,538
We found a cook who can make
1179
01:06:34,608 --> 01:06:36,054
a French appetizer
1180
01:06:36,098 --> 01:06:38,086
and an Ivoirian main course.
1181
01:06:38,536 --> 01:06:41,200
Great! We can have
Attiéké poisson braisé
1182
01:06:41,224 --> 01:06:43,715
with jus de of Gnamakoudji.
- What?
1183
01:06:43,902 --> 01:06:46,319
Jus de Gnamakoudji.
1184
01:06:46,958 --> 01:06:49,859
It turns out, we'll be fewer
than expected.
1185
01:06:50,005 --> 01:06:52,771
- Ah, how many?
- Ten, give or take.
1186
01:06:52,772 --> 01:06:54,606
The rest all cancelled.
1187
01:06:54,747 --> 01:06:57,340
But, we put down a deposit...
1188
01:06:57,426 --> 01:07:00,176
Didn't you get
cancellation insurance?
1189
01:07:00,209 --> 01:07:01,548
Well, no!
1190
01:07:02,216 --> 01:07:03,743
You should have.
1191
01:07:03,876 --> 01:07:06,543
African man is unpredictable.
1192
01:07:09,075 --> 01:07:10,483
Do you like it?
1193
01:07:10,587 --> 01:07:12,755
Lovely, but a bit small.
1194
01:07:14,857 --> 01:07:18,014
For the Mass, I was thinking
a Bible passage,
1195
01:07:18,091 --> 01:07:20,262
that we could read together.
1196
01:07:21,418 --> 01:07:22,886
That one.
1197
01:07:27,163 --> 01:07:29,561
It's my favorite passage.
1198
01:07:29,889 --> 01:07:32,029
- Hello Mme. Verneuil!
- Hello Father!
1199
01:07:32,083 --> 01:07:34,820
- You're early.
- We have lots to prepare.
1200
01:07:34,897 --> 01:07:37,106
The first religious wedding
of a Verneuil girl?
1201
01:07:37,160 --> 01:07:38,385
I guess you would be!
1202
01:07:38,418 --> 01:07:41,129
You look radiant! It's
a pleasure to see.
1203
01:07:41,154 --> 01:07:43,719
Thanks. May I introduce
Mme Koffi.
1204
01:07:43,821 --> 01:07:47,755
- Hello, Mme Koffi.
- Hello Father, I'm Charles' mother.
1205
01:07:47,794 --> 01:07:48,824
Charles?...
1206
01:07:48,849 --> 01:07:51,029
- The groom.
- The groom?
1207
01:07:51,545 --> 01:07:53,647
The one who'll marry Laure?
1208
01:07:53,672 --> 01:07:55,326
Yes. The groom!
1209
01:07:56,969 --> 01:07:57,971
Heh!
1210
01:07:58,347 --> 01:07:59,284
Heh!
1211
01:07:59,357 --> 01:08:01,429
Why is he laughing like that?
1212
01:08:01,523 --> 01:08:04,456
- What is it, Fater?
- Nothing, excuse me.
1213
01:08:06,059 --> 01:08:07,064
Heh!
1214
01:08:07,596 --> 01:08:09,149
Be right back.
1215
01:08:09,344 --> 01:08:11,356
(Ho-ho, ho-ho...)
1216
01:08:11,607 --> 01:08:14,907
He's so good natured.
Happy all the time.
1217
01:08:31,503 --> 01:08:33,409
9-2. What a thrashing!
1218
01:08:33,530 --> 01:08:35,187
I have a shitty racquet.
1219
01:08:35,212 --> 01:08:37,092
We have the same kind.
1220
01:08:38,185 --> 01:08:40,165
Rachid, can I ask you something?
1221
01:08:40,190 --> 01:08:41,982
Can, we finish the match?
1222
01:08:42,037 --> 01:08:44,958
Wait 2 seconds, it's not
the Olympics, OK?
1223
01:08:45,090 --> 01:08:48,707
What do you think of me in the
Halal business? - Halal? You?
1224
01:08:48,755 --> 01:08:50,755
Chao's bank'll give a loan.
1225
01:08:50,810 --> 01:08:53,052
But.. Classy Halal!
1226
01:08:53,357 --> 01:08:56,259
'Eye' level. (high)
100% Biologic Organic!
1227
01:08:56,376 --> 01:08:58,640
We'll call it, AraBio.
- Arabio?!
1228
01:08:58,702 --> 01:09:02,641
Yeah. Arab, Bio -- AraBio!
I thought up the name.
1229
01:09:02,737 --> 01:09:04,779
What a rotten name!
1230
01:09:05,044 --> 01:09:06,294
I told you!
1231
01:09:06,365 --> 01:09:09,589
- Do you think it's rotten?
- Rotten as an old tree trunk.
1232
01:09:09,653 --> 01:09:11,526
Otherwise it's good idea.
1233
01:09:11,620 --> 01:09:15,799
Except, a Kike and a Chink
horning in on the Muslims' business?
1234
01:09:15,846 --> 01:09:18,137
It could blow up in your faces.
1235
01:09:18,226 --> 01:09:20,240
You'll need a good laywer.
1236
01:09:20,318 --> 01:09:21,747
A Camel Jockey.
1237
01:09:21,919 --> 01:09:23,622
What do we do?
1238
01:09:23,751 --> 01:09:25,141
Hire him?
1239
01:09:26,138 --> 01:09:27,482
We hire him!
1240
01:09:27,943 --> 01:09:31,177
Thanks guys, I hate being
court-appointed lawyer at Bobigny!
1241
01:09:31,227 --> 01:09:34,644
Well... France is just hunky dory!
1242
01:09:36,496 --> 01:09:38,651
We met in a court of law.
1243
01:09:38,706 --> 01:09:41,199
Isabelle pled
against me and won.
1244
01:09:41,241 --> 01:09:42,808
Par for the course!
1245
01:09:43,035 --> 01:09:45,845
I lost a trial but gained a wife!
1246
01:09:47,352 --> 01:09:48,569
And you Chao?
1247
01:09:48,661 --> 01:09:53,161
Well, like them, in an everyday setting
we met in my office.
1248
01:09:53,208 --> 01:09:56,202
I was always overdrawn
and was lucky to find
1249
01:09:56,249 --> 01:09:59,031
a particularely
understanding banker.
1250
01:09:59,896 --> 01:10:02,722
You sleep with your clients?
1251
01:10:06,582 --> 01:10:09,222
No I marry them.
1252
01:10:09,630 --> 01:10:12,337
And you two?
You never told your story.
1253
01:10:12,431 --> 01:10:14,384
- We met in the theater...
- OK!
1254
01:10:14,454 --> 01:10:16,221
I've heard enough,
1255
01:10:16,981 --> 01:10:19,041
I'm going to bed.
1256
01:10:23,161 --> 01:10:25,137
Communists!
1257
01:10:27,622 --> 01:10:30,549
Me too, I have a
splitting headache!
1258
01:10:30,627 --> 01:10:32,289
But, papa...
1259
01:10:46,022 --> 01:10:47,111
Not sleepy?
1260
01:10:47,140 --> 01:10:51,767
No I envision (Dictator) Bokassa
in my bed and I can't sleep!
1261
01:10:51,890 --> 01:10:53,843
You could have asked!
1262
01:10:54,094 --> 01:10:55,480
What a violation! Oh!
1263
01:10:55,505 --> 01:10:58,342
What possessed you to
give them our room?
1264
01:10:58,400 --> 01:11:00,731
[Thursday July 3.
2 days before the wedding]
1265
01:11:06,373 --> 01:11:09,752
Mama, what did you do
with my self-portrait?
1266
01:11:09,905 --> 01:11:11,865
- Did you sell it?
- Sell it?!
1267
01:11:11,927 --> 01:11:13,139
No!
1268
01:11:13,232 --> 01:11:16,263
But you're right,
it's no longer there!
1269
01:11:16,443 --> 01:11:19,394
That's odd! Go ask your father.
1270
01:11:19,668 --> 01:11:22,003
I'm sure you sold it.
1271
01:11:23,566 --> 01:11:25,354
I feel weak!
1272
01:11:25,643 --> 01:11:27,456
wait... It's hot.
1273
01:11:28,430 --> 01:11:29,772
Odile, Isabelle!
1274
01:11:29,850 --> 01:11:32,935
Come take care of your sister,
my class is starting.
1275
01:11:32,967 --> 01:11:34,029
Coming!
1276
01:11:36,816 --> 01:11:38,122
They sold it!
1277
01:11:38,170 --> 01:11:40,206
With the other 3
butchers in the region,
1278
01:11:40,231 --> 01:11:41,951
you'll make a huge butchery,
1279
01:11:41,982 --> 01:11:43,510
if you'll permit my saying so.
1280
01:11:43,565 --> 01:11:45,024
- Papa.
- Yes.
1281
01:11:45,094 --> 01:11:47,654
why did you sell the
Ségolène's picture?
1282
01:11:47,763 --> 01:11:48,786
One moment.
1283
01:11:48,833 --> 01:11:50,976
It's sneaky, she's totally floored.
1284
01:11:50,977 --> 01:11:53,826
Think! Who'd buy a
scribble like that?
1285
01:11:53,970 --> 01:11:57,923
It fell when I put it in the attic
in its rightful place.
1286
01:11:58,095 --> 01:12:01,841
Yes. We hung it up, only when
Ségolène came to Chinon.
1287
01:12:01,904 --> 01:12:04,091
- Ah, not a bad idea!
- 'Course not.
1288
01:12:04,137 --> 01:12:05,865
Excuse me, I have visitors.
1289
01:12:05,935 --> 01:12:10,005
Sorry, where were we?... The roof:
redone in 2007, as was the plumbing .
1290
01:12:10,030 --> 01:12:11,286
Papa, what's going on?
1291
01:12:11,380 --> 01:12:14,950
M. Perez, continue the house tour
I'll join you later.
1292
01:12:15,019 --> 01:12:17,724
- Are you selling the house?
- Yes, I'm selling it!
1293
01:12:17,779 --> 01:12:20,211
Don't worry your mother
will get her share.
1294
01:12:20,236 --> 01:12:21,922
I'll set aside my office-work,
1295
01:12:21,947 --> 01:12:23,777
Bertrand can get by without me,
1296
01:12:23,825 --> 01:12:25,964
and I'm leaving on a world tour!
1297
01:12:25,965 --> 01:12:28,089
At my age, it's now or never.
1298
01:12:28,200 --> 01:12:31,161
Why the dirty look?
After all it's because of you.
1299
01:12:31,208 --> 01:12:33,474
You gave me a taste
of exoticism.
1300
01:12:33,532 --> 01:12:36,270
With a bit of luck
I'll find a woman, too.
1301
01:12:36,443 --> 01:12:42,183
A Tahitian.. Papuan.. an Eskimo, huh?
Anything's possible in the Verneuil family!
1302
01:12:42,490 --> 01:12:45,560
-You're leaving mama?
- She'll get over it, dear!
1303
01:12:45,630 --> 01:12:50,129
Anyway your mother and I
no longer share the same values, so...
1304
01:12:50,474 --> 01:12:54,380
There, what'd I tell you?
She's starting with the Zumba again!
1305
01:12:54,427 --> 01:12:57,794
- Mom does Zumba?!
- Yes, your mother Zumbas.
1306
01:12:57,982 --> 01:12:59,294
M. Perez?
1307
01:12:59,380 --> 01:13:00,736
Come on!
1308
01:13:00,840 --> 01:13:04,974
She Zumbas in my ears, all day!
It's busting my eardrums!
1309
01:13:05,045 --> 01:13:07,560
♪ Zumba tout le monde
danse la Zumba
1310
01:13:07,638 --> 01:13:09,786
♪ On dècompresse sur la Zumba
1311
01:13:09,849 --> 01:13:12,881
♪ He Zumba Ha Zumba
1312
01:13:12,919 --> 01:13:14,732
♪ Lo que traigo se llama Zumba
1313
01:13:14,779 --> 01:13:16,864
♪ Lo que canto se llama Zumba
1314
01:13:16,903 --> 01:13:20,201
♪ He Zumba Ha Zumba
1315
01:13:20,279 --> 01:13:22,372
♪ Lo que traigo se llama Zumba
1316
01:13:22,419 --> 01:13:24,193
♪ Lo que canto se llama Zumba
1317
01:13:24,271 --> 01:13:27,717
♪ He Zumba Ha Zumba
1318
01:13:27,795 --> 01:13:29,607
♪ Soyez prêts pour la zumba
1319
01:13:29,724 --> 01:13:34,396
My shrink recommended physical activity.
Does me a power of good!
1320
01:13:34,482 --> 01:13:37,036
- I'm having a blast!
- Me too. A blast!
1321
01:13:37,099 --> 01:13:40,582
You know Dad's selling the house
and going around the world?
1322
01:13:40,607 --> 01:13:42,755
Good riddance!
1323
01:13:45,333 --> 01:13:48,631
♪ Zumba tout le monde
danse la... Zumba!
1324
01:13:50,822 --> 01:13:54,472
Mustn't put the old geezers
together. - Oh, for sure!
1325
01:13:56,586 --> 01:13:58,410
You ok, Ségo?
1326
01:13:58,565 --> 01:14:00,762
Yeah... OK.
1327
01:14:03,062 --> 01:14:04,457
Coffee for everybody?
1328
01:14:04,482 --> 01:14:07,579
Yes, but mama and
Madeleine want tisane.
1329
01:14:07,950 --> 01:14:09,825
Ohh, horrible dinner!
1330
01:14:09,905 --> 01:14:11,286
Disastrous.
1331
01:14:11,387 --> 01:14:14,229
- I'm so depressed.
- You have reason to be.
1332
01:14:14,276 --> 01:14:16,410
We must talk to
Laure and Ségo.
1333
01:14:16,450 --> 01:14:20,560
No, Ségo will go apeshit...
and Laure will just blame herself.
1334
01:14:20,607 --> 01:14:22,099
No Laure is solid.
1335
01:14:22,163 --> 01:14:25,530
It's not her fault if our
parents are divorcing!
1336
01:14:39,738 --> 01:14:42,166
Not tonight,
I'm not in the mood.
1337
01:14:42,432 --> 01:14:44,096
We're off to a great start...
1338
01:14:44,158 --> 01:14:47,986
Not yet married and already
not screwing. - It's not funny.
1339
01:14:48,198 --> 01:14:49,750
Good night.
1340
01:14:51,647 --> 01:14:53,226
Good night.
1341
01:14:53,367 --> 01:14:56,141
[Friday July 4th.
One day before the wedding]
1342
01:15:03,934 --> 01:15:06,823
I had a good Jewish friend!
1343
01:15:06,902 --> 01:15:08,070
Oh, yeah?
1344
01:15:08,095 --> 01:15:12,676
Levy, was his name; a dentist.
Redid my whole mouth.
1345
01:15:13,509 --> 01:15:15,788
Look at the quality.
1346
01:15:15,843 --> 01:15:18,218
Oh, yeah, that's nice...
1347
01:15:18,715 --> 01:15:20,658
- M. Verneuil!
- Oh... yes?
1348
01:15:20,900 --> 01:15:22,690
I'd like a tete-a-tete.
1349
01:15:22,736 --> 01:15:25,663
It's not possible, I've
an appointment, M. Koffi.
1350
01:15:25,688 --> 01:15:28,246
- It's important.
- Ok, I'm listening.
1351
01:15:28,306 --> 01:15:30,566
I said, tete-a-tete.
1352
01:15:42,042 --> 01:15:43,450
Shit!
1353
01:15:44,512 --> 01:15:47,809
Since we'll be obliged to
rub shoulders
1354
01:15:47,975 --> 01:15:52,035
I'd like to clear things up,
between us M. Verneuil.
1355
01:15:52,176 --> 01:15:55,576
- I'm against this marriage.
- I gathered that.
1356
01:15:55,577 --> 01:16:00,158
I'm not racist, but I'd prefer my son
to marry a black woman!
1357
01:16:00,272 --> 01:16:02,833
An African, an Ivoirian!
1358
01:16:02,896 --> 01:16:04,596
I'm not racist either but
1359
01:16:04,628 --> 01:16:08,575
I'd prefer my daughter marry
a white, European Frenchman!
1360
01:16:08,638 --> 01:16:11,400
- Ah, y-you're against it?
- Of course.
1361
01:16:11,434 --> 01:16:14,071
And to think, I took
you for a Communist!
1362
01:16:14,118 --> 01:16:15,864
Communist? Me?!
1363
01:16:16,219 --> 01:16:17,873
I'm a Gaullist, Monsieur!
1364
01:16:18,013 --> 01:16:19,380
Ah, me too!
1365
01:16:19,480 --> 01:16:22,253
Except for his African policies,
of course.
1366
01:16:22,284 --> 01:16:23,659
A real disaster!
1367
01:16:23,722 --> 01:16:27,959
W-well.. African leaders took advantage
of the situation, too!
1368
01:16:28,058 --> 01:16:31,267
Funny, it's always our fault?
Always the fault of the whites?
1369
01:16:31,337 --> 01:16:35,120
Precisely Monsieur, you pillaged us
and continue to do so.
1370
01:16:35,174 --> 01:16:38,087
You take our riches and
leave nothing for us.
1371
01:16:38,112 --> 01:16:40,185
- Not even cocoa!
- Oh, yeah, yeah...
1372
01:16:40,218 --> 01:16:41,930
What about the wedding?
1373
01:16:41,992 --> 01:16:44,664
Weren't you supposed
to pay for half?
1374
01:16:44,742 --> 01:16:46,422
Where's my cheque?
1375
01:16:46,865 --> 01:16:48,325
That is so petty!
1376
01:16:48,381 --> 01:16:49,685
-Yeah?
- Really!
1377
01:16:49,747 --> 01:16:53,521
We're talking geopolitics and you're
wearing me out with your money issues.
1378
01:16:53,546 --> 01:16:55,763
I'm wearing you out?
You're wearing me out!
1379
01:16:55,764 --> 01:16:58,256
Because of you I
slept in the attic!
1380
01:16:58,301 --> 01:17:00,543
Watch it!
Lower your tone.
1381
01:17:00,657 --> 01:17:03,154
- Or else...
- Or else what?
1382
01:17:03,928 --> 01:17:05,256
I got a bite!
1383
01:17:07,187 --> 01:17:08,551
Help me!
1384
01:17:08,831 --> 01:17:10,583
It's a Pike!
1385
01:17:10,935 --> 01:17:12,365
Ahh, thanks!
1386
01:17:13,790 --> 01:17:15,700
Oh, you beast! You beast!
1387
01:17:15,888 --> 01:17:18,590
We're tiring him out! Tiring him!
1388
01:17:21,493 --> 01:17:22,674
Wow!
1389
01:17:22,889 --> 01:17:25,736
Kate Middleton's got
nothing on you!
1390
01:17:27,452 --> 01:17:28,685
- You ok?
- Great.
1391
01:17:28,742 --> 01:17:31,872
My parents are divorcing because
of me, but it's all right!
1392
01:17:35,588 --> 01:17:37,281
Ségo, don't blame yourself...
1393
01:17:37,354 --> 01:17:41,203
It's not because of you.
We all share responsibility
1394
01:17:44,287 --> 01:17:45,707
She's feeling a little blue.
1395
01:17:45,732 --> 01:17:49,301
It's normal, dear. I was the same
on my wedding day.
1396
01:17:49,426 --> 01:17:52,677
The little bird's afraid
to leave the nest, hm?
1397
01:17:55,160 --> 01:17:57,636
What about you Ségolène?
1398
01:17:58,357 --> 01:18:00,191
Oh, no, it's normal for you!
1399
01:18:00,237 --> 01:18:02,941
OK, I have so much to do
gotta go!
1400
01:18:04,281 --> 01:18:06,936
By the way, did you
see your father?
1401
01:18:06,961 --> 01:18:08,170
No...
1402
01:18:11,802 --> 01:18:13,653
- Nice catch!
- Lovey!
1403
01:18:14,466 --> 01:18:15,763
Ah, it's heavy!
1404
01:18:16,087 --> 01:18:17,552
- Argh!
- What?
1405
01:18:17,849 --> 01:18:20,419
Dirty trick!
I thought it was dead!
1406
01:18:20,450 --> 01:18:23,161
I didn't hit him hard enough!
1407
01:18:26,568 --> 01:18:28,068
You all right?
1408
01:18:28,184 --> 01:18:30,706
I was in the Marine Infantry
Monsieur,
1409
01:18:30,731 --> 01:18:34,104
and no little French fish
will get the better of me!
1410
01:18:34,244 --> 01:18:36,070
So, where were we?
1411
01:18:36,195 --> 01:18:37,804
The marriage...
1412
01:18:37,842 --> 01:18:39,967
I tell you, I'm against it.
1413
01:18:40,171 --> 01:18:41,734
Totally against!
1414
01:18:42,488 --> 01:18:45,956
What can we do, M. Koffi;
kidnap the priest?
1415
01:18:45,981 --> 01:18:49,169
Would you believe,
I've actually considered it!
1416
01:18:49,212 --> 01:18:50,794
Me too.
1417
01:18:52,554 --> 01:18:55,615
So? Nothing worth eating
on white people's plates?
1418
01:18:55,640 --> 01:18:58,325
Hm, for an appetizer,
it's about right!
1419
01:19:00,059 --> 01:19:01,262
Koffi!...
1420
01:19:01,525 --> 01:19:03,790
Another one of the same.
1421
01:19:06,650 --> 01:19:09,411
Madeleine, did you see
my husband?
1422
01:19:09,567 --> 01:19:12,060
No, I'm looking for mine too.
1423
01:19:12,357 --> 01:19:14,419
They left together, fishing.
1424
01:19:14,599 --> 01:19:17,747
Fishing? With all there is to do today!
1425
01:19:17,966 --> 01:19:20,607
Ah men... champion loafers!
1426
01:19:20,685 --> 01:19:21,833
M-hm!
1427
01:19:22,279 --> 01:19:23,901
Shouldn't we call them?
1428
01:19:23,926 --> 01:19:27,529
- Don't worry, they'll come!
- Mom, I have a bad feeling
1429
01:19:28,193 --> 01:19:29,941
Wanna know something?
1430
01:19:30,006 --> 01:19:33,277
Mixing doesn't work.
It's scientific.
1431
01:19:33,348 --> 01:19:34,983
How, scientific?
1432
01:19:35,156 --> 01:19:36,790
Demonstration...
1433
01:19:40,531 --> 01:19:42,017
Oil...
1434
01:19:43,322 --> 01:19:44,875
Water...
1435
01:19:47,142 --> 01:19:48,993
I stir...
1436
01:19:50,775 --> 01:19:54,173
It doesn't mix. There's the proof.
1437
01:19:54,329 --> 01:19:56,219
Nice demonstration.
1438
01:19:57,898 --> 01:19:59,909
- But in 'chappukino'
- Heh?
1439
01:19:59,934 --> 01:20:02,529
The, the... 'cappuccino' - Hm!
1440
01:20:02,643 --> 01:20:06,079
The milk mixes very well
with coffee.
1441
01:20:07,314 --> 01:20:08,664
Exactly.
1442
01:20:09,531 --> 01:20:11,466
What I said was idiotic.
1443
01:20:11,521 --> 01:20:14,755
To make up for it,
let me buy you a Calvados.
1444
01:20:15,615 --> 01:20:18,208
Oh, for pity's sake!
My wife!
1445
01:20:20,246 --> 01:20:22,272
Mine too, Pete's sake!
1446
01:20:22,542 --> 01:20:23,636
Hey!
1447
01:20:23,691 --> 01:20:24,973
A Calvados!
1448
01:20:25,277 --> 01:20:26,480
Voice message...
1449
01:20:26,519 --> 01:20:29,279
Let's look for them.
Where does papa usually fish?
1450
01:20:29,312 --> 01:20:33,144
Remember the pond where
I taught you how to swim? - Yeah. Come
1451
01:20:34,140 --> 01:20:38,179
We're dealing with family issues!
Why won't they let us think?
1452
01:20:38,224 --> 01:20:40,306
One bottle of Calvados!
1453
01:20:42,836 --> 01:20:44,281
You sure it's this way?
1454
01:20:44,313 --> 01:20:47,626
I spend my childhood here,
you wanna teach me the way?!
1455
01:20:47,690 --> 01:20:49,671
OK, don't get upset!
1456
01:20:53,743 --> 01:20:57,008
- Good bye, messieurs.
- Bye, thanks for everything.
1457
01:20:57,102 --> 01:21:01,507
- Gérard, it suits you very well!
- Bring your wife, here's their card.
1458
01:21:01,570 --> 01:21:05,735
Now, you'll marry an Ivoirian!
- Yeah, sure...
1459
01:21:10,567 --> 01:21:14,836
- Some dessert, André?
- Yep, and not just any dessert!
1460
01:21:15,732 --> 01:21:17,802
-Bonjour Monsieur.
- Hello!
1461
01:21:17,857 --> 01:21:20,636
I 'd like a Tête de Nègre!
(Niggerhead)
1462
01:21:20,661 --> 01:21:22,360
- Pardon?
- Tête de nègre.
1463
01:21:22,394 --> 01:21:23,477
Are you deaf?
1464
01:21:23,791 --> 01:21:26,603
Is this what you're
looking for, Koffi?
1465
01:21:28,344 --> 01:21:32,643
René, call the police there's
two nutters looking for trouble.
1466
01:21:33,108 --> 01:21:36,483
Yes, yes, I recognize it.
It's Tête de Nègre.
1467
01:21:36,546 --> 01:21:38,179
Full of Tête de Nègre!
1468
01:21:38,225 --> 01:21:42,264
No Sir, it's the same recipe but,
now we call it Chocolate Meringue.
1469
01:21:42,319 --> 01:21:44,304
Chocolate Meringue?...
1470
01:21:45,770 --> 01:21:47,472
You say that because I'm here.
1471
01:21:47,529 --> 01:21:50,912
I'm sure with your other clients
you call it Tête de Nègre
1472
01:21:50,951 --> 01:21:52,388
- Not at all!
- OK...
1473
01:21:52,505 --> 01:21:56,021
- Let's verify this, huh Claude?
- We have all day!
1474
01:21:58,440 --> 01:21:59,784
Tête de nègre!
1475
01:21:59,831 --> 01:22:03,151
No, Chocolate Meringue.
"Choco-head" at times...
1476
01:22:03,176 --> 01:22:05,511
- Choco-head.
- Hmm!
1477
01:22:09,520 --> 01:22:11,788
- Dad's handkerchief.
- You sure?
1478
01:22:11,845 --> 01:22:13,773
Look; his initials!
1479
01:22:14,893 --> 01:22:19,371
I hope my father didn't hit him.
- What? He wouldn't dare do that?
1480
01:22:19,841 --> 01:22:22,872
- Is he a savage?
- Savage?! Watch your expressions!
1481
01:22:22,910 --> 01:22:25,355
Don't get your Irish up, now!
- You weren't there!
1482
01:22:25,401 --> 01:22:28,743
Your father could've made a racist remark!
It's just like him, no?
1483
01:22:28,768 --> 01:22:32,008
Initials on a handkerchief!
That's real white!
1484
01:22:34,047 --> 01:22:36,562
- Will you let me go!
- To the drunk tank!
1485
01:22:36,587 --> 01:22:39,375
It's an enormous mistake I'm a notary!
- Yeah, right!
1486
01:22:39,435 --> 01:22:43,208
- I'm with the Verneuil-Creuset Bureau!
- Never heard of it!
1487
01:22:43,294 --> 01:22:45,446
You will hear of it, trust me!
1488
01:22:45,471 --> 01:22:47,349
Careful with my boubou!
1489
01:22:48,779 --> 01:22:49,880
OK?
1490
01:22:53,187 --> 01:22:56,275
-I found papa's handkerchief.
- What happened?
1491
01:22:56,300 --> 01:22:58,687
Let me, Marie, I'm a lawyer!
1492
01:22:59,670 --> 01:23:01,125
Appears to be blood.
1493
01:23:01,523 --> 01:23:04,575
We'll call local hospitals
and police stations.
1494
01:23:04,692 --> 01:23:08,024
- And the morgues.
- No Ségolène, not yet.
1495
01:23:09,273 --> 01:23:14,022
So, André, do you have a lot of immigrants in
Côte d'Ivoire?
1496
01:23:14,074 --> 01:23:15,778
Oh, don't get me started!
1497
01:23:15,828 --> 01:23:18,459
Lebanese, Arabs, Chinese...
1498
01:23:19,461 --> 01:23:22,014
At least you don't have
any blacks.
1499
01:23:28,482 --> 01:23:30,302
Excellent!
1500
01:23:30,826 --> 01:23:34,169
- What's so funny, you?
- Yeah, it was a good gag!
1501
01:23:34,263 --> 01:23:36,365
Relax André, you laughed too.
1502
01:23:36,403 --> 01:23:40,355
You know what they say: laugh
at anything but not with anyone.
1503
01:23:40,396 --> 01:23:42,316
Hang on, I'M 'anyone'?!
1504
01:23:42,341 --> 01:23:45,700
- Watch your tone Albino!
- Get back Kirikou!
1505
01:23:45,748 --> 01:23:47,036
André!
1506
01:23:47,084 --> 01:23:48,279
Aah!
1507
01:23:48,904 --> 01:23:50,466
- Claude...
- Bloody hell!
1508
01:23:50,528 --> 01:23:51,513
Claude?
1509
01:23:53,208 --> 01:23:54,880
Absolutely, yes Indeed
1510
01:23:55,019 --> 01:23:57,255
Very well... Thanks a million.
1511
01:23:57,513 --> 01:23:59,451
Thanks a million. Bye.
1512
01:24:00,411 --> 01:24:02,484
It's fine, they found them.
1513
01:24:03,318 --> 01:24:06,612
They're in custody at Chinon police station.
- What did they do?
1514
01:24:06,683 --> 01:24:09,690
Public drunkenness, insulting an officer. - What!
1515
01:24:09,753 --> 01:24:11,386
It could be, ♫! Y'know?
1516
01:24:11,472 --> 01:24:13,849
Mama they're gonna deport us!
1517
01:24:14,252 --> 01:24:16,841
Well, the ceremony's
all screwed up!
1518
01:24:16,921 --> 01:24:19,364
Fine, they got what they wanted!
1519
01:24:31,474 --> 01:24:34,083
Let me do the talking, ok?
1520
01:24:35,974 --> 01:24:37,519
I'm sorry Claude.
1521
01:24:37,745 --> 01:24:39,990
All because of this
albino cretin!
1522
01:24:40,029 --> 01:24:42,472
I'm not albino!
My old man's blond.
1523
01:24:42,527 --> 01:24:47,044
- Seriously Claude isn't he albino?
- Fuck if I care, whether he's albino!
1524
01:24:47,164 --> 01:24:48,794
You ruined my nose!
1525
01:24:49,271 --> 01:24:52,537
Ah, finally! They're coming for us!
1526
01:24:52,840 --> 01:24:55,794
My son-in-law, the lawyer,
will get us out.
1527
01:24:56,036 --> 01:24:57,599
I don't understand...
1528
01:24:58,270 --> 01:25:00,654
What are you to Mr Verneuil?
1529
01:25:00,979 --> 01:25:03,329
I told you, his son-in-law.
1530
01:25:04,013 --> 01:25:06,420
- And you?
- His son-in-law.
1531
01:25:08,147 --> 01:25:10,609
I imagine you're
his son-in-law too?
1532
01:25:10,634 --> 01:25:11,764
Yes Monsieur.
1533
01:25:15,388 --> 01:25:18,490
If you say you're his son-in-law,
I'll blow a fuse.
1534
01:25:18,521 --> 01:25:20,521
- Almost.
- How, almost?
1535
01:25:20,794 --> 01:25:22,636
I'm M. Koffi's son.
1536
01:25:22,661 --> 01:25:27,446
Tomorrow I'll marry M. Verneuil's daughter.
So I'm almost his son-in-law.
1537
01:25:28,251 --> 01:25:29,867
Get outta here.
1538
01:25:30,541 --> 01:25:32,734
Get the fuck out!
1539
01:25:33,477 --> 01:25:35,446
(Get the fuck out, dammit!)
1540
01:25:37,777 --> 01:25:42,099
I never said he was *Clarence Darrow.
(Badinter)
1541
01:25:54,840 --> 01:25:58,775
It's all fine. With any luck they'll
be free before the ceremony.
1542
01:25:58,800 --> 01:26:00,940
'Any luck', meaning?...
1543
01:26:01,605 --> 01:26:03,791
Some luck.
1544
01:26:11,556 --> 01:26:13,681
What are you doing?
1545
01:26:13,994 --> 01:26:16,228
Going back to Paris.
1546
01:26:16,861 --> 01:26:20,236
Let's cancel everything, Charles.
It won't work. - You're kidding?
1547
01:26:20,292 --> 01:26:23,424
Not because of our argument, earlier?
- Not at all! - What, then?
1548
01:26:23,494 --> 01:26:25,450
Our families can
never get along.
1549
01:26:25,521 --> 01:26:28,646
To hell with them, we're in love,
it's all that matters!
1550
01:26:28,692 --> 01:26:31,676
You say that now, but
you'll suffer for it.
1551
01:26:32,540 --> 01:26:35,469
Charles, my parents
decided to divorce.
1552
01:26:35,607 --> 01:26:37,904
That's a whole other dimension!!
1553
01:26:37,954 --> 01:26:43,171
Can you see me telling our children,
their grandparents divorced because of us?
1554
01:26:44,076 --> 01:26:46,054
No.
1555
01:26:52,154 --> 01:26:53,670
Charles.
1556
01:27:00,993 --> 01:27:04,096
Don't hate me, I'm sorry.
1557
01:27:06,549 --> 01:27:10,232
[Saturday July 5th. Event day]
1558
01:27:14,919 --> 01:27:19,700
We'll make quenelles with this pike.
You'll see André, it's delicious!
1559
01:27:21,349 --> 01:27:24,180
That's some welcome!
What, did anyone die?
1560
01:27:24,205 --> 01:27:27,355
- The 4 of us need to talk.
- A good, long talk!
1561
01:27:27,427 --> 01:27:30,786
Woah, easy, let us catch our breath!
We're hungry.
1562
01:27:30,811 --> 01:27:32,184
Shut your trap!
1563
01:27:32,813 --> 01:27:36,282
Listen up, both of you!
Figure out yourselves how to do it,
1564
01:27:36,321 --> 01:27:40,321
but you'll bring Laure and Charles
at 11 on the dot to the church!
1565
01:27:40,352 --> 01:27:42,039
Or don't come back!
1566
01:27:42,208 --> 01:27:44,865
- Right, Madeleine?
- Couldn't have said it better!
1567
01:27:44,906 --> 01:27:47,255
'S'matter? A glitch?
1568
01:28:04,207 --> 01:28:07,019
- Where's my daughter?
- In the train!
1569
01:28:09,743 --> 01:28:13,179
Not even able to keep a wife!
Good-for-nothing!
1570
01:28:35,803 --> 01:28:40,072
Really, Laure! You can't cancel a wedding on a whim!
1571
01:28:40,073 --> 01:28:44,237
I prefer to cut my losses, before
you gut each other in the church.
1572
01:28:44,238 --> 01:28:47,360
What's she talking about? We're the
best friends in the world, huh André?
1573
01:28:47,385 --> 01:28:48,963
We adore each other!
1574
01:28:49,009 --> 01:28:53,435
To the point of fisticuffs? I found your
bloody handkerchief! - It's nothing!
1575
01:28:53,500 --> 01:28:55,818
We did a Blood Brother pact!
1576
01:28:56,012 --> 01:28:57,841
With your nose papa?
1577
01:28:57,974 --> 01:29:02,386
It's too late, it's a direct train to Paris.
We'll never make it to church.
1578
01:29:05,271 --> 01:29:07,980
Oh la la! Please!
1579
01:29:09,138 --> 01:29:12,193
Please, he's fainted! Pull the alarm!
1580
01:29:13,224 --> 01:29:16,092
He's the Finance Minister
of Burundi!
1581
01:29:16,247 --> 01:29:17,771
Hurry up!
1582
01:29:19,708 --> 01:29:22,935
- Burundi?
- It's working, shh!
1583
01:29:51,817 --> 01:29:55,773
Don't worry, she'll come!
Beautiful ladies are always late!
1584
01:29:55,774 --> 01:29:59,313
I say that, but I wouldn't know.
It's just what they say.
1585
01:30:00,269 --> 01:30:01,332
Ah!
1586
01:31:11,624 --> 01:31:15,552
Being a soldier
I'll make my speech
1587
01:31:15,795 --> 01:31:17,867
clear and concise.
1588
01:31:18,326 --> 01:31:20,220
I tried to stop him talking, but...
1589
01:31:20,290 --> 01:31:24,029
Today is a great day
for the Koffi family.
1590
01:31:24,212 --> 01:31:26,001
A great relief, even.
1591
01:31:26,262 --> 01:31:29,349
My eldest son is
finally married.
1592
01:31:29,442 --> 01:31:32,311
And to a ravishing
girl, to boot.
1593
01:31:33,230 --> 01:31:36,973
I won't hide that I
was starting to worry,
1594
01:31:37,044 --> 01:31:40,527
especially since he failed
his high school final exam
1595
01:31:40,610 --> 01:31:44,035
and took up the
career of a clown.
1596
01:31:48,323 --> 01:31:51,061
Sonny boy, I'm teasing!
1597
01:31:51,460 --> 01:31:53,720
I'm proud of you!
1598
01:31:55,175 --> 01:31:59,028
I'm also proud of
my French in-laws.
1599
01:31:59,661 --> 01:32:01,029
Claude...
1600
01:32:01,119 --> 01:32:03,398
Thank you, André.
1601
01:32:08,123 --> 01:32:12,286
Thanks. I'm also very
happy for this wedding.
1602
01:32:13,139 --> 01:32:16,622
Even if, to be totally honest,
I'm a bit jealous.
1603
01:32:16,709 --> 01:32:20,637
Yes, Charles, Laure, you're young,
beautiful, intelligent.♥
1604
01:32:20,723 --> 01:32:25,178
Your whole lives ahead of you. Plus,
you're going on a great honeymoon.
1605
01:32:25,233 --> 01:32:28,430
It's a bit unfair. So I decided
to balance things out.
1606
01:32:28,632 --> 01:32:29,849
Marie?
1607
01:32:29,985 --> 01:32:33,482
Will you go on another
honeymoon with me?
1608
01:32:37,235 --> 01:32:39,204
- Yes.
- Perfect!
1609
01:32:39,603 --> 01:32:41,266
We'll do a world tour.
1610
01:32:41,312 --> 01:32:45,196
We'll take the opportunity to drop in on
Chao's family in Peking,
1611
01:32:45,282 --> 01:32:47,396
Rachid's in Algiers,
1612
01:32:47,900 --> 01:32:49,596
David's in Tel-Aviv,
1613
01:32:49,818 --> 01:32:52,568
and finally Charles' in Abidjan.
1614
01:32:52,607 --> 01:32:55,297
Where I'll collect my
cheque from you André.
1615
01:32:55,322 --> 01:32:58,938
- I'll send you a wire transfer.
- Thanks.
1616
01:32:59,355 --> 01:33:03,206
- Here's to the newlyweds!
- To the newlyweds!
1617
01:33:34,133 --> 01:33:38,231
♪ (Coupé-décalé)
1618
01:33:39,971 --> 01:34:44,969
Encoded By Narko And Uploaded By XpoZ
https://xpoztorrent.wordpress.com
125267
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Somali
Swahili
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
