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Previously on
Hap and Leonard.
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00:00:07,354 --> 00:00:08,953
Who the hell is that?
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00:00:08,981 --> 00:00:10,926
***
4
00:00:12,192 --> 00:00:14,567
I'm glad 'bout
what happened between us.
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00:00:14,684 --> 00:00:16,439
I just have a feeling
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00:00:16,465 --> 00:00:18,793
that I might never see you again.
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It just doesn't work.
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In the end,
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it's always me and you.
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00:00:35,669 --> 00:00:37,904
[INSECTS CHIRPING, FROG CROAKING]
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00:00:40,250 --> 00:00:42,753
[TRAIN HORN BLOWING]
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00:00:52,867 --> 00:00:54,303
[TRAIN HORN BLOWS]
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[TRAIN HORN BLOWING]
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00:01:07,046 --> 00:01:10,261
BELINDA:
Some roads you don't cross.
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00:01:10,952 --> 00:01:12,726
L.C. Soothe learned that
16
00:01:12,752 --> 00:01:14,800
the day the Devil
came to Grovetown.
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[TRAIN HORN BLARES]
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_
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L.C. had the Blues in his heart,
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but his fingers were
stiff as a corpse.
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So he killed a chicken,
boiled its blood,
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and called up the Devil.
[GUITAR PLAYING]
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[WHOOSH]
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[THUNDER CRASHES]
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♪ EERIE MUSIC ♪
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00:01:53,428 --> 00:01:57,428
♪♪
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00:02:02,836 --> 00:02:04,305
[ZIPPER OPENS]
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00:02:04,339 --> 00:02:07,309
♪♪
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00:02:07,342 --> 00:02:09,711
[BOTH URINATING]
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00:02:16,083 --> 00:02:20,083
♪♪
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00:02:22,456 --> 00:02:24,092
Ahh.
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00:02:24,125 --> 00:02:28,125
♪♪
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[INSECTS CHIRPING]
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[CREAKING]
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♪♪
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[BLUES RIFF PLAYING]
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00:02:46,815 --> 00:02:50,815
♪♪
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00:02:51,819 --> 00:02:54,121
[DRUMS PLAY IN DISTANCE]
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00:02:54,155 --> 00:02:57,158
♪♪
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00:02:57,192 --> 00:02:59,294
[GUITAR PLAYING]
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00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:03,320
♪♪
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00:03:07,367 --> 00:03:11,367
♪♪
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00:03:15,690 --> 00:03:18,293
With old Scratch
pumping through his veins,
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00:03:18,325 --> 00:03:22,325
L.C. became the best
Blues player ever lived.
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00:03:22,462 --> 00:03:23,698
♪♪
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00:03:23,730 --> 00:03:25,699
But the Devil makes no deals
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00:03:26,065 --> 00:03:28,346
he don't get a little
something extra.
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00:03:28,635 --> 00:03:29,637
♪♪
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00:03:29,669 --> 00:03:31,588
Every time L.C. played,
50
00:03:31,614 --> 00:03:35,268
that damn Devil got a little
piece of somebody's soul...
51
00:03:36,877 --> 00:03:40,381
and replaced it with
a little bit of himself.
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[INDISTINCT TALKING, CHEERING]
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00:03:45,286 --> 00:03:49,286
♪♪
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♪♪
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And that little bit of the Devil
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made the people of Grovetown
crazy mean sons of bitches.
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00:04:25,460 --> 00:04:26,828
[SCREAMING]
58
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[INDISTINCT SHOUTING]
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♪♪
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00:04:37,170 --> 00:04:41,170
♪ HOROR BACKROUND SOUND ♪
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♪♪
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♪♪
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00:05:01,128 --> 00:05:02,864
[GAGGING]
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00:05:02,897 --> 00:05:04,766
[GAGGING STOPS]
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00:05:06,267 --> 00:05:07,534
[FROG CROAKS]
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00:05:07,568 --> 00:05:10,504
BELINDA: Bad things happened
on the tracks that night.
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00:05:10,537 --> 00:05:12,407
[FROG CROAKS]
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00:05:12,439 --> 00:05:16,439
♪♪
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00:05:17,511 --> 00:05:21,262
Some say the Devil
never left this place.
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00:05:27,755 --> 00:05:31,126
Some say he never will.
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00:05:34,628 --> 00:05:37,771
What the hell happened
to you boys back there?
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00:05:38,532 --> 00:05:40,335
BELINDA:
The black and white brothers
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00:05:40,368 --> 00:05:43,138
from way across the tracks
found that out.
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00:05:43,171 --> 00:05:44,606
♪♪
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00:05:44,638 --> 00:05:46,731
Found it out the hard way.
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00:05:46,873 --> 00:05:50,549
♪ CREDITS ♪
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♪♪
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Synced and corrected by LittleDuck
www.addic7ed.com
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00:06:03,457 --> 00:06:07,457
♪♪
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00:06:11,631 --> 00:06:15,631
♪♪
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_
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00:06:31,652 --> 00:06:35,652
♪ SOFT GUITAR ♪
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00:06:36,457 --> 00:06:38,393
[ENGINE SHUTS OFF, CAR DOOR OPENS]
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00:06:38,426 --> 00:06:39,961
♪♪
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[DOOR DINGING]
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Come on.
I got you, bro.
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Easy.
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♪♪
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[CAR DOOR CLOSES, ENGINE STARTS]
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♪♪
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00:07:10,432 --> 00:07:12,565
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
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00:07:25,408 --> 00:07:26,643
You don't want a hand?
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00:07:46,275 --> 00:07:49,119
♪ ANXIETY GROWING ♪
94
00:07:50,662 --> 00:07:52,264
[LIGHT CLICKS]
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00:07:52,298 --> 00:07:54,167
♪♪
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00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:55,200
[LIGHT CLICKS]
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00:07:55,234 --> 00:07:58,204
♪♪
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00:07:58,236 --> 00:07:59,371
[LIGHT CLICKS]
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[KNOCK ON DOOR]
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CLINTON: Hey.
You need anything?
101
00:08:25,230 --> 00:08:26,500
Nah.
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00:08:27,318 --> 00:08:29,488
Got everything I need
right here.
103
00:08:29,568 --> 00:08:32,549
♪ TENSION BUILDING ♪
104
00:08:40,445 --> 00:08:43,276
["CHRISTMAS TIME'S A-COMIN'"
PLAYS]
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00:08:48,347 --> 00:08:50,463
_
106
00:08:50,489 --> 00:08:52,825
♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
107
00:08:52,859 --> 00:08:55,057
♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
108
00:08:55,134 --> 00:08:57,070
♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
109
00:08:57,096 --> 00:08:59,098
♪ And I know I'm goin' home ♪
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00:09:00,633 --> 00:09:02,956
♪ Snowflakes a-fallin' ♪
111
00:09:02,982 --> 00:09:04,950
♪ My old home's a-callin' ♪
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00:09:05,171 --> 00:09:07,474
♪ Tall pine's are hummin' ♪
113
00:09:07,507 --> 00:09:10,276
♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
114
00:09:10,526 --> 00:09:13,096
♪ Can't ya hear them bells
ringin', ringin'? ♪
115
00:09:13,122 --> 00:09:15,291
♪ Joy, joy, hear them singin' ♪
116
00:09:15,317 --> 00:09:17,687
♪ When it's snowin'
I'll be goin' ♪
117
00:09:17,805 --> 00:09:20,663
♪ Back to my country home ♪
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00:09:21,877 --> 00:09:23,597
♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
119
00:09:23,623 --> 00:09:25,859
Ho, ho, ho,
you crack-smokin' mother...
120
00:09:25,892 --> 00:09:27,861
♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
121
00:09:27,893 --> 00:09:30,129
♪ And I know I'm goin' home ♪
122
00:09:30,162 --> 00:09:31,630
[INDISTINCT SHOUTING]
123
00:09:31,795 --> 00:09:34,799
♪ SOLO BANJO ♪
124
00:09:35,634 --> 00:09:36,869
[SCREAMS]
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00:09:36,902 --> 00:09:39,738
♪♪
126
00:09:39,772 --> 00:09:41,773
[BOTH GRUNTING]
127
00:09:41,806 --> 00:09:44,057
♪♪
128
00:09:44,303 --> 00:09:46,345
Aah! I'm on fire!
129
00:09:46,378 --> 00:09:48,447
Santa's comin'
to spread some holiday cheer
130
00:09:48,916 --> 00:09:50,417
and whoop some ass.
131
00:09:50,615 --> 00:09:52,918
- ♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
- SINGING: Christmas time's a-comin'
132
00:09:52,951 --> 00:09:55,455
- ♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
- SINGING: Christmas time's a-comin'
133
00:09:55,488 --> 00:09:57,357
- Christmas...
- ♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
134
00:09:57,389 --> 00:09:59,359
♪ And I know I'm goin' home ♪
135
00:09:59,392 --> 00:10:00,826
I'm on fire!
136
00:10:00,859 --> 00:10:03,030
- What?
- ♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
137
00:10:03,329 --> 00:10:05,165
♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
[SCREAMS]
138
00:10:05,197 --> 00:10:07,599
Get! Don't you come back now,
ya hear?
139
00:10:07,633 --> 00:10:09,502
♪ And I know I'm goin' home ♪
140
00:10:09,535 --> 00:10:11,538
HAP: Aw, no, Leonard.
141
00:10:11,570 --> 00:10:13,473
- Not again.
- ♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
142
00:10:13,506 --> 00:10:15,284
- ♪ Christmas time's a-comin' ♪
- I told y'all.
143
00:10:15,310 --> 00:10:17,210
LEONARD: I don't want no drugs
in my neighborhood.
144
00:10:17,243 --> 00:10:19,144
[BOTTLES RATTLE]
Get on, now! Get!
145
00:10:20,278 --> 00:10:21,790
Hey, Hap!
146
00:10:21,816 --> 00:10:22,918
[RADIO CRASHES, MUSIC STOPS]
147
00:10:22,944 --> 00:10:23,912
Leonard.
148
00:10:23,938 --> 00:10:25,405
- You, too!
- [SCREAMS]
149
00:10:25,484 --> 00:10:26,667
I'm on fire!
150
00:10:26,693 --> 00:10:28,105
[SHOUTING]
151
00:10:28,720 --> 00:10:30,433
[SIREN WAILS]
152
00:10:31,456 --> 00:10:33,245
- Aah!
- Hey, hold still.
153
00:10:33,271 --> 00:10:34,346
Hold still!
154
00:10:34,493 --> 00:10:35,862
Hey, man, you just hittin' me now!
155
00:10:35,894 --> 00:10:38,183
You probably want to rethink
this hairdo anyway.
156
00:10:38,209 --> 00:10:39,805
Aah! Come on, man!
Come on!
157
00:10:39,831 --> 00:10:40,966
This shit is dope!
158
00:10:40,999 --> 00:10:42,697
Good to see you again, Cletus.
159
00:10:43,065 --> 00:10:44,367
What happened
to your mohawk?
160
00:10:44,604 --> 00:10:46,665
That ain't a mohawk.
That's a high top.
161
00:10:46,691 --> 00:10:47,878
Is that what it is?
[SIREN WAILS]
162
00:10:47,904 --> 00:10:49,784
I guess it's about time you
changed that out anyway, huh?
163
00:10:49,810 --> 00:10:51,445
That's exactly what I said.
164
00:10:51,471 --> 00:10:53,106
Man, this is a hot box, man.
165
00:10:53,191 --> 00:10:55,647
Yeah, well, you about to spend
New Year's behind bars.
166
00:10:55,681 --> 00:10:57,339
What?
Th-This dude hit me!
167
00:10:57,365 --> 00:10:59,508
I had a flamin' hot box comin' at me.
168
00:10:59,719 --> 00:11:02,058
Had to put him down
to put him out.
169
00:11:02,887 --> 00:11:04,274
I thought you quit.
170
00:11:04,556 --> 00:11:07,493
Yeah, well, I like to quit
a few times a year.
171
00:11:07,526 --> 00:11:10,123
That way she tastes that much
better when I get back to her.
172
00:11:10,233 --> 00:11:11,402
Uh-huh.
173
00:11:11,631 --> 00:11:13,466
[GLASS SHATTERS]
Damn.
174
00:11:13,498 --> 00:11:15,734
I think this might be
Leonard's best one yet.
175
00:11:16,138 --> 00:11:17,878
Practice makes all the difference.
176
00:11:18,604 --> 00:11:21,407
Dopin' sons of bitches.
Get the hell out of here!
177
00:11:21,440 --> 00:11:23,542
- [GROANS]
- That's the last of 'em.
178
00:11:27,886 --> 00:11:30,190
- Merry Christmas, Charlie.
- Merry Christmas, Leonard.
179
00:11:30,682 --> 00:11:33,852
I was just tellin' Hap this
might be your best one yet.
180
00:11:33,886 --> 00:11:37,144
Yeah.
A thing of beauty, ain't it?
181
00:11:37,370 --> 00:11:39,459
Y'all just not gonna get me
any medical attention?
182
00:11:39,492 --> 00:11:40,760
[HANDCUFFS CLICK, SIRENS WAILING]
183
00:11:40,792 --> 00:11:41,893
Quit whining, Cletus.
184
00:11:41,926 --> 00:11:43,762
[WOOD CLATTERING, GLASS SHATTERING]
185
00:11:43,796 --> 00:11:46,032
- Name?
- Uh, Boogie Wilson.
186
00:11:46,065 --> 00:11:48,823
Merry Christmas, Boogie.
Take a seat. Name?
187
00:11:49,067 --> 00:11:51,670
- HAP: What the hell am I doin' here?
- Aiding and abetting.
188
00:11:51,704 --> 00:11:55,340
- I saved a man's life tonight.
- I seen it on my own porch.
189
00:11:55,373 --> 00:11:56,743
I mean, Hap's a hero.
190
00:11:56,776 --> 00:11:58,428
Should get a-a Samaritan award
or somethin'.
191
00:11:58,454 --> 00:11:59,421
- Right.
- Man,
192
00:11:59,447 --> 00:12:01,087
I'm putting cases
on both your asses.
193
00:12:01,113 --> 00:12:03,082
Shut up, Cletus.
It's Christmas Eve.
194
00:12:03,315 --> 00:12:04,916
Peace on Earth, goodwill toward men.
195
00:12:04,950 --> 00:12:06,386
- Go sit down now.
- All that crap.
196
00:12:06,418 --> 00:12:08,431
Cletus Carter the Third, welcome back.
197
00:12:08,457 --> 00:12:09,759
Take a seat.
198
00:12:09,888 --> 00:12:11,056
Thank you, ma'am.
199
00:12:11,089 --> 00:12:12,425
That's better.
200
00:12:12,458 --> 00:12:13,960
Collins and Pine.
201
00:12:13,993 --> 00:12:15,603
Pine and Collins.
202
00:12:15,696 --> 00:12:17,345
Welcome back.
203
00:12:17,662 --> 00:12:19,765
Heard this one was the best yet,
Leonard.
204
00:12:19,799 --> 00:12:22,068
Thank you, ma'am.
I set the bar high for myself.
205
00:12:22,100 --> 00:12:24,803
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
206
00:12:24,836 --> 00:12:26,398
All right, let's go.
207
00:12:26,424 --> 00:12:28,548
I want to show you two
shit birds something.
208
00:12:28,574 --> 00:12:30,923
[DRUMROLL]
209
00:12:34,323 --> 00:12:35,917
Wife got me started at this.
210
00:12:36,581 --> 00:12:38,388
Thought it'd help me quit smoking.
211
00:12:40,485 --> 00:12:42,371
She got me a book on it.
212
00:12:45,657 --> 00:12:47,393
Right there's a duck.
213
00:12:49,266 --> 00:12:50,863
Look like a spider to me.
214
00:12:50,896 --> 00:12:51,897
HAP: Mm-hmm.
215
00:12:53,064 --> 00:12:54,867
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
216
00:12:54,900 --> 00:12:56,870
Workin' on my bunny rabbit.
217
00:12:58,937 --> 00:13:00,505
Bunny rabbit.
218
00:13:00,538 --> 00:13:01,662
- Spider.
- Spider.
219
00:13:02,428 --> 00:13:03,671
Oh.
220
00:13:07,780 --> 00:13:09,228
That's a pussy.
221
00:13:09,254 --> 00:13:10,555
Oh, God.
222
00:13:10,581 --> 00:13:11,917
Don't tell me that book of yours
223
00:13:11,950 --> 00:13:14,166
got a chapter on shadow vaginas.
224
00:13:14,357 --> 00:13:16,548
Well, here.
Leonard, this one's for you.
225
00:13:16,574 --> 00:13:17,776
Wock!
226
00:13:17,956 --> 00:13:19,859
Charlie!
Where that hell is Hanson?
227
00:13:19,892 --> 00:13:21,330
He's on his way.
228
00:13:21,594 --> 00:13:23,562
Take my advice... Don't pull
your smart-ass routine
229
00:13:23,588 --> 00:13:24,931
on him when he gets here.
230
00:13:24,964 --> 00:13:27,767
He's been in a shitty mood
since him and Florida broke up.
231
00:13:27,793 --> 00:13:28,736
[SCOFFS]
232
00:13:28,762 --> 00:13:31,104
Well, I've been there.
233
00:13:31,347 --> 00:13:33,773
He's trying to work things out
with the wife.
234
00:13:34,139 --> 00:13:35,907
Unh.
They got kids, ya know.
235
00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:37,042
- I know.
- Hap.
236
00:13:37,075 --> 00:13:38,510
- I don't care.
- Hap!
237
00:13:38,536 --> 00:13:39,504
What?
238
00:13:39,545 --> 00:13:42,345
Just 'cause she broke up with him
don't make it good news for you.
239
00:13:42,376 --> 00:13:44,717
- Did I say it was?
- Oh, but you was thinkin' it.
240
00:13:44,749 --> 00:13:46,032
Detective.
241
00:13:46,058 --> 00:13:48,994
Guy in cell three wants
we should call his wife,
242
00:13:49,020 --> 00:13:51,757
tell her to tape a nature show
special off the TV.
243
00:13:51,804 --> 00:13:53,439
Otherwise, he's gonna miss it.
244
00:13:53,465 --> 00:13:55,462
It's a special about bears.
245
00:13:55,761 --> 00:13:57,130
- Hey, Peg.
- Uh-huh?
246
00:13:57,162 --> 00:13:58,831
What's this look like to you?
247
00:14:01,466 --> 00:14:02,768
Whew!
248
00:14:02,801 --> 00:14:04,017
TOGETHER: Spider.
249
00:14:04,704 --> 00:14:06,171
Oh. God damn.
250
00:14:06,205 --> 00:14:09,212
NARRATOR: As the snow melts
and Mother Sun returns,
251
00:14:09,238 --> 00:14:11,267
they awaken from their slumber.
252
00:14:11,535 --> 00:14:14,739
High atop a quagmire,
we find Ginger bear.
253
00:14:14,913 --> 00:14:17,010
We'll be seeing her again.
254
00:14:17,348 --> 00:14:19,951
With winter gone
and a tug in her loins,
255
00:14:20,219 --> 00:14:21,970
she goes looking for a mate
256
00:14:22,035 --> 00:14:25,329
and a safe place for her cubs
during the mating season.
257
00:14:25,724 --> 00:14:27,560
Spring is for romance.
258
00:14:27,593 --> 00:14:29,562
[ALL GROAN, MAN WOLF-WHISTLES]
259
00:14:29,594 --> 00:14:31,564
Can you believe this shit?
I mean...
260
00:14:31,596 --> 00:14:33,765
I don't believe it.
[BEARS GROWLING]
261
00:14:33,799 --> 00:14:36,469
Two bears doin' the mambo
right there on TV.
262
00:14:36,502 --> 00:14:37,737
Mm-mm.
263
00:14:37,769 --> 00:14:41,106
You think bear dicks get swelled
up in a knot like dog dicks do?
264
00:14:42,141 --> 00:14:43,642
I don't know, Cletus.
265
00:14:43,676 --> 00:14:46,112
I never finished my degree
on bear dicks.
266
00:14:46,144 --> 00:14:48,814
Oh, Hap, stop lyin'.
Now you're just bein' modest.
267
00:14:48,848 --> 00:14:50,587
CHARLIE:
You know, when I was a kid,
268
00:14:50,613 --> 00:14:52,393
they wouldn't even show
one dog behind the other
269
00:14:52,419 --> 00:14:53,986
in case something like this happened.
270
00:14:54,018 --> 00:14:55,900
BOOGIE: World's changin', man.
271
00:14:56,438 --> 00:14:58,399
Ain't nothin' sacred
out there no mo'.
272
00:14:58,425 --> 00:14:59,612
CLETUS: Amen.
273
00:15:00,686 --> 00:15:02,134
Girl bear looks bored.
274
00:15:02,628 --> 00:15:04,162
[NARRATOR SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
275
00:15:04,413 --> 00:15:07,090
Remind you of your wife,
Detective Blank?
276
00:15:07,532 --> 00:15:09,734
[BEAR GROWLS]
277
00:15:09,767 --> 00:15:12,004
[LAUGHTER]
278
00:15:14,172 --> 00:15:15,575
All right!
279
00:15:15,608 --> 00:15:18,077
Get it out.
Get it out.
280
00:15:20,245 --> 00:15:22,681
HANSON: Put these dipsticks
back in their cells.
281
00:15:26,051 --> 00:15:28,186
I want you in my office.
Now.
282
00:15:28,219 --> 00:15:30,790
[CELL DOORS UNLOCKING,
CREAKING IN DISTANCE]
283
00:15:31,518 --> 00:15:33,517
Just Collins.
284
00:15:35,828 --> 00:15:36,947
Leonard.
285
00:15:37,764 --> 00:15:40,400
Remind me to stop bein' friends
with you.
286
00:15:43,108 --> 00:15:44,643
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
287
00:15:46,674 --> 00:15:48,151
_
288
00:15:48,244 --> 00:15:50,513
If I burnt down every dirtbag's
house 'round here,
289
00:15:50,546 --> 00:15:52,095
the whole town'd be cinders.
290
00:15:52,121 --> 00:15:54,759
They was sellin' drugs, Hanson, to kids.
291
00:15:54,785 --> 00:15:56,867
Now, if you boys would arrest them,
292
00:15:56,893 --> 00:15:58,629
then Leonard wouldn't feel the need
293
00:15:58,662 --> 00:16:00,440
to burn their house down,
now, would he, hm?
294
00:16:00,466 --> 00:16:01,791
It makes us look bad.
295
00:16:01,817 --> 00:16:03,653
So, you gonna take that out on Leonard?
296
00:16:03,679 --> 00:16:05,410
- This is his third strike, Hap.
- Oh, come on.
297
00:16:05,436 --> 00:16:06,666
Just give him one more.
298
00:16:06,736 --> 00:16:08,681
You don't know how baseball
works, do you?
299
00:16:08,773 --> 00:16:10,274
[TELEPHONE RINGING IN DISTANCE]
300
00:16:10,307 --> 00:16:11,676
[SCOFFS]
301
00:16:15,463 --> 00:16:17,222
Ain't heard from Florida, have you?
302
00:16:17,248 --> 00:16:18,377
What?
303
00:16:18,582 --> 00:16:20,193
Have you heard from Florida?
304
00:16:22,163 --> 00:16:25,565
Well, we're not pen pals or nothin'.
305
00:16:25,922 --> 00:16:28,486
I-I saw her
couple of months back.
306
00:16:28,658 --> 00:16:30,794
- Mm.
- She was out with some friends.
307
00:16:30,827 --> 00:16:32,230
Nothin' special.
308
00:16:32,263 --> 00:16:33,794
Suppose you heard we broke up.
309
00:16:34,998 --> 00:16:36,329
Oh, that...
310
00:16:36,627 --> 00:16:38,001
that is a damn shame.
311
00:16:38,034 --> 00:16:40,367
If you wanna dance,
get up, have at it.
312
00:16:40,393 --> 00:16:41,995
I always thought that you two
313
00:16:42,028 --> 00:16:43,964
were just the...
the best couple.
314
00:16:43,998 --> 00:16:45,205
I...
315
00:16:45,704 --> 00:16:47,008
Mm-hmm.
316
00:16:48,926 --> 00:16:51,137
Mm.
Well, I'm worried about her.
317
00:16:51,749 --> 00:16:53,618
She went down to Grovetown
the other day.
318
00:16:53,644 --> 00:16:54,525
Oh.
319
00:16:55,041 --> 00:16:56,489
See a client.
320
00:16:57,134 --> 00:16:59,168
Told her it was a bad idea, but...
321
00:16:59,620 --> 00:17:01,122
[SCOFFS]
she wouldn't listen.
322
00:17:01,382 --> 00:17:04,505
Well, Grovetown's always a bad idea.
323
00:17:05,353 --> 00:17:07,281
I mean, she can take care of herself.
324
00:17:07,820 --> 00:17:09,033
She's smart.
325
00:17:09,257 --> 00:17:11,279
Maybe too smart for her own good.
326
00:17:12,351 --> 00:17:14,005
She called me from there yesterday.
327
00:17:14,693 --> 00:17:16,449
I didn't like the way she sounded.
328
00:17:16,930 --> 00:17:19,228
Well, I tried.
I tried everything.
329
00:17:19,867 --> 00:17:21,469
Told her, "Baby, come on home,"
330
00:17:21,502 --> 00:17:25,111
but she just said,
"I can't. Not yet."
331
00:17:25,938 --> 00:17:28,703
Thing that's got me shook,
though, is...
332
00:17:29,085 --> 00:17:30,369
h-how she said it.
333
00:17:32,109 --> 00:17:33,328
Sounded scared.
334
00:17:34,409 --> 00:17:36,244
Where do I come into all this?
335
00:17:36,270 --> 00:17:38,093
I want you to go down there
and bring her home.
336
00:17:38,119 --> 00:17:39,418
- What, me?
- You.
337
00:17:40,086 --> 00:17:41,421
What... What about you?
338
00:17:41,455 --> 00:17:42,986
I'm back with the wife.
339
00:17:43,012 --> 00:17:45,348
It wouldn't look good I go
chasin' after Florida, you know?
340
00:17:45,526 --> 00:17:47,712
- Well...
- 'Sides, I got kids.
341
00:17:47,805 --> 00:17:49,173
It's Christmas.
342
00:17:49,363 --> 00:17:51,174
But you, you got nobody.
343
00:17:51,794 --> 00:17:54,219
- I got Leonard.
- Well, his ass is in jail.
344
00:17:54,334 --> 00:17:56,036
Shit, Hanson.
345
00:17:57,104 --> 00:17:58,576
Grovetown?
346
00:17:58,840 --> 00:18:00,899
- Send Charlie.
- Charlie's police.
347
00:18:01,575 --> 00:18:04,204
This ain't police business.
It's personal.
348
00:18:08,394 --> 00:18:09,947
You do this for me,
349
00:18:11,202 --> 00:18:13,837
I'll let Leonard out of jail
when you get back.
350
00:18:17,509 --> 00:18:19,111
I do this for you,
351
00:18:20,348 --> 00:18:22,783
you gotta let Leonard
out of jail now.
352
00:18:23,998 --> 00:18:25,267
Tonight.
353
00:18:28,936 --> 00:18:31,539
["I'M GONNA LASSO SANTA CLAUS" PLAYS]
354
00:18:31,572 --> 00:18:34,976
♪♪
355
00:18:35,008 --> 00:18:37,578
Grovetown gives shitholes
a bad name, Hap.
356
00:18:37,612 --> 00:18:40,634
Yep.
I've heard the stories.
357
00:18:40,925 --> 00:18:43,364
It's a two-hour ride
but a hundred years away.
358
00:18:43,918 --> 00:18:45,253
They don't like black folk there
359
00:18:45,286 --> 00:18:48,055
unless they swabbin' out the
toilet or sweepin' the floor
360
00:18:48,088 --> 00:18:50,501
or steppin' off the curb
let the white man pass.
361
00:18:50,958 --> 00:18:52,905
Klan's alive and kickin' there.
362
00:18:53,160 --> 00:18:56,230
Call themselves the Supreme
Order of Caucasian Assholes,
363
00:18:56,264 --> 00:18:57,486
some such shit.
364
00:18:57,763 --> 00:19:00,308
Well, if it's so bad, why did
Hanson ask us to go there?
365
00:19:00,334 --> 00:19:02,237
Well, he ain't askin' you.
He's askin' Hap.
366
00:19:02,269 --> 00:19:04,305
- Well, it's the same thing.
- No, it ain't the same thing!
367
00:19:04,337 --> 00:19:07,075
Guy like you in Grovetown start
the next goddamn Civil War.
368
00:19:07,107 --> 00:19:08,976
Well, I can't help it
if I'm burstin' with charm.
369
00:19:09,009 --> 00:19:11,808
You're burstin' with bullshit's
what you're burstin' with.
370
00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:14,315
Now, Hap, you take my advice.
371
00:19:14,347 --> 00:19:16,483
You go down there,
you get in, you get out.
372
00:19:16,517 --> 00:19:18,327
You don't take Leonard with you.
373
00:19:19,054 --> 00:19:21,128
Grovetown and black folk don't mix,
374
00:19:21,154 --> 00:19:23,579
and Leonard Pine does not
play well with others.
375
00:19:24,935 --> 00:19:27,004
[CAR DOOR CLOSES]
CHARLIE: Remember what I said!
376
00:19:27,193 --> 00:19:29,360
Be back in an hour, partner.
377
00:19:29,926 --> 00:19:31,667
We'll take my car.
378
00:19:32,065 --> 00:19:34,201
Should hit Grovetown by morning.
379
00:19:34,235 --> 00:19:36,371
I'll get the sandwiches and the guns.
380
00:19:36,513 --> 00:19:38,484
What do we need guns for?
381
00:19:39,054 --> 00:19:40,288
Never know.
382
00:19:40,408 --> 00:19:42,443
Might be in the mood
to shoot somethin'.
383
00:19:42,476 --> 00:19:44,112
[SIGHS]
384
00:19:44,399 --> 00:19:46,243
You don't need to do this, ya know.
385
00:19:46,797 --> 00:19:48,423
Ain't doin' it for you, Hap.
386
00:19:48,449 --> 00:19:50,078
Florida's family.
387
00:19:51,106 --> 00:19:52,993
Yeah. Right.
388
00:19:53,020 --> 00:19:54,155
Oh, hey.
389
00:19:54,407 --> 00:19:55,487
Nearly forgot.
390
00:19:56,055 --> 00:19:57,464
Merry Christmas.
391
00:19:59,125 --> 00:20:00,527
You shouldn't have.
392
00:20:01,318 --> 00:20:02,735
Man, I ain't get you nothin'.
393
00:20:03,021 --> 00:20:04,151
I know.
394
00:20:05,364 --> 00:20:07,467
You're the only gift I need, Leonard.
395
00:20:08,721 --> 00:20:10,523
[ENGINE STARTS]
396
00:20:15,343 --> 00:20:17,111
[DOOR CREAKS]
397
00:20:17,143 --> 00:20:19,113
[INSECTS CHIRPING]
398
00:20:23,049 --> 00:20:27,049
♪♪
399
00:20:30,223 --> 00:20:31,992
[DOG BARKS IN DISTANCE]
400
00:20:32,026 --> 00:20:34,362
♪♪
401
00:20:34,394 --> 00:20:35,997
[LOCK CLICKS]
402
00:20:36,029 --> 00:20:40,029
♪ SOFT GUITAR ♪
403
00:20:41,369 --> 00:20:43,471
[FLOOR CREAKS]
404
00:20:43,497 --> 00:20:47,157
♪♪
405
00:20:53,146 --> 00:20:57,146
♪♪
406
00:21:02,623 --> 00:21:06,623
♪♪
407
00:21:12,266 --> 00:21:16,266
♪♪
408
00:21:21,741 --> 00:21:23,478
[FLOOR CREAKS QUIETLY]
409
00:21:26,180 --> 00:21:29,750
♪♪
410
00:21:29,784 --> 00:21:31,786
[DOG BARKS IN DISTANCE]
411
00:21:31,818 --> 00:21:33,754
[CREAKING]
412
00:21:47,941 --> 00:21:50,360
Aaaaah!
413
00:21:51,285 --> 00:21:52,987
[GRUNTING]
414
00:21:54,993 --> 00:21:56,328
- Come on, man!
- Come on, please!
415
00:21:56,360 --> 00:21:57,528
We don't want...
We don't want no trouble!
416
00:21:57,561 --> 00:21:59,231
The hell you doin' in my house?
417
00:21:59,263 --> 00:22:01,098
Was guardin' the house next
door, but then we got hungry,
418
00:22:01,131 --> 00:22:02,767
and them crackheads
don't got shit to eat.
419
00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:05,070
- Ah...
- Yeah! Yeah, we went to get pizza,
420
00:22:05,102 --> 00:22:07,772
came back, and we seen you
burnt the place down again.
421
00:22:07,806 --> 00:22:08,807
Yeah, and the cops took you in,
422
00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:10,876
so we just figured
we'd use your place to eat.
423
00:22:10,908 --> 00:22:12,631
This look like a cafeteria to you?
424
00:22:12,657 --> 00:22:15,312
No. But it's a real nice place
you got.
425
00:22:15,346 --> 00:22:17,382
There's some pizza in
the kitchen if you're hungry.
426
00:22:17,415 --> 00:22:18,983
- You can have some.
- Yeah.
427
00:22:19,016 --> 00:22:20,084
Yeah, you can have it.
428
00:22:21,675 --> 00:22:23,311
What kind of pizza?
429
00:22:24,321 --> 00:22:26,491
["DREAMER" PLAYS ON RADIO]
430
00:22:26,523 --> 00:22:29,994
♪♪
431
00:22:30,028 --> 00:22:32,063
[BRAKES SQUEAL]
432
00:22:32,096 --> 00:22:35,066
♪♪
433
00:22:35,098 --> 00:22:37,234
[THUNDER RUMBLES]
434
00:22:37,268 --> 00:22:40,750
♪♪
435
00:22:44,041 --> 00:22:45,409
["DREAMER" PLAYS]
436
00:22:45,443 --> 00:22:47,579
♪ Dreamer ♪
437
00:22:49,280 --> 00:22:52,274
♪ I've been called ♪
438
00:22:53,384 --> 00:22:55,815
♪ A dreamer ♪
439
00:22:57,910 --> 00:23:00,480
♪ With no future at all ♪
440
00:23:02,926 --> 00:23:06,079
♪ They call me dreamer boy ♪
441
00:23:06,496 --> 00:23:09,025
♪ Oh, but that's all right ♪
442
00:23:09,233 --> 00:23:11,758
- [CLEARS THROAT]
- ♪ 'Cause I know ♪
443
00:23:12,070 --> 00:23:13,796
♪ I know ♪
444
00:23:14,004 --> 00:23:16,241
♪ That you know ♪
445
00:23:16,273 --> 00:23:18,358
- Hap.
- Florida.
446
00:23:18,384 --> 00:23:20,078
- ♪ I'm more than a dreamer ♪
- Hi.
447
00:23:20,110 --> 00:23:22,235
- Hello.
- Ladies.
448
00:23:22,646 --> 00:23:25,149
- ♪ And with you, darlin' ♪
- You're lookin' good.
449
00:23:25,183 --> 00:23:26,550
♪ I can make it ♪
450
00:23:26,583 --> 00:23:30,149
- But then, you always do.
- ♪ By and by ♪
451
00:23:30,922 --> 00:23:32,089
Well, you look the same.
452
00:23:32,123 --> 00:23:33,568
Hm. Hm.
453
00:23:34,224 --> 00:23:35,626
♪♪
454
00:23:37,395 --> 00:23:38,896
Uh, you, uh...
455
00:23:38,929 --> 00:23:40,397
♪ Loser ♪
456
00:23:40,431 --> 00:23:42,300
You wanna dance?
457
00:23:42,332 --> 00:23:44,002
♪ They say I won't succeed ♪
458
00:23:44,034 --> 00:23:45,402
Uh...
459
00:23:45,435 --> 00:23:47,172
♪♪
460
00:23:47,204 --> 00:23:49,073
- ♪ Refuser ♪
- Sure.
461
00:23:49,107 --> 00:23:50,642
Watch my bag.
462
00:23:50,675 --> 00:23:53,278
♪ To conformity ♪
463
00:23:55,079 --> 00:23:58,095
♪ But I believe a man ♪
464
00:23:58,649 --> 00:24:02,649
♪ Should reach over yonder
to touch a star ♪
465
00:24:03,253 --> 00:24:05,890
♪ 'Cause with his hands
in the dirt ♪
466
00:24:05,924 --> 00:24:08,225
♪ Doin' that eight-hour work ♪
467
00:24:08,259 --> 00:24:11,363
♪ A man just can't go far ♪
468
00:24:11,396 --> 00:24:15,086
♪ You got to be a dreamer ♪
469
00:24:15,666 --> 00:24:17,827
♪ And with you, darlin' ♪
470
00:24:18,002 --> 00:24:19,960
♪ I can make it ♪
471
00:24:20,237 --> 00:24:23,238
♪ By and by ♪
472
00:24:24,342 --> 00:24:26,606
♪♪
473
00:24:26,867 --> 00:24:29,625
♪ I'll dream us up ♪
474
00:24:30,548 --> 00:24:33,251
♪ A paradise ♪
475
00:24:35,118 --> 00:24:38,445
♪ Just you and me ♪
476
00:24:39,123 --> 00:24:42,594
♪ And sugar and spice ♪
477
00:24:43,593 --> 00:24:47,368
♪ Yes, I'm a dreamer ♪
478
00:24:49,087 --> 00:24:52,523
♪ And I'll make it
in this old world ♪
479
00:24:54,237 --> 00:24:56,162
♪ Dream... ♪
[DOORBELL RINGS]
480
00:24:57,608 --> 00:24:58,643
[INSECTS CHIRPING]
481
00:24:58,675 --> 00:25:01,079
[DOOR CREAKS]
482
00:25:04,733 --> 00:25:05,930
Florida?
483
00:25:10,931 --> 00:25:12,165
[DOOR CREAKS AND CLOSES]
484
00:25:17,183 --> 00:25:18,395
Florida?
485
00:25:52,033 --> 00:25:53,204
[CHUCKLES]
486
00:26:00,167 --> 00:26:01,936
[SNIFFS]
487
00:26:06,778 --> 00:26:08,969
[SWITCH CLICKS]
You gonna sniff them, too?
488
00:26:09,203 --> 00:26:10,514
Jesus, Hanson!
489
00:26:10,723 --> 00:26:12,123
Damn!
490
00:26:12,149 --> 00:26:14,151
That's creepy.
What the hell you doin' here?
491
00:26:14,177 --> 00:26:15,805
Shit, I'm a cop.
492
00:26:16,035 --> 00:26:17,375
What's your excuse?
493
00:26:18,187 --> 00:26:19,975
I just figured I'd check.
494
00:26:20,124 --> 00:26:21,593
See if she got back.
495
00:26:21,626 --> 00:26:23,427
You didn't believe me about her,
did you?
496
00:26:23,461 --> 00:26:24,559
Hmm?
497
00:26:25,195 --> 00:26:27,015
Oh, truth is, uh...
498
00:26:28,130 --> 00:26:30,574
I half expected her to be here.
499
00:26:30,772 --> 00:26:32,073
Hidin' from you.
500
00:26:32,843 --> 00:26:34,745
That girl don't hide from nothin'.
501
00:26:34,963 --> 00:26:36,509
That's what I'm scared of.
502
00:26:37,018 --> 00:26:39,493
Don't know when to quit
pickin' the scabs.
503
00:26:40,677 --> 00:26:42,214
Damn.
504
00:26:46,250 --> 00:26:48,670
What is it about women, Collins?
505
00:26:50,187 --> 00:26:52,970
Take cavemen like us,
506
00:26:53,696 --> 00:26:56,059
twist our peckers up into knots, and...
507
00:26:56,620 --> 00:26:58,404
leave us to untie 'em.
508
00:26:58,956 --> 00:27:00,705
Shit ain't right.
509
00:27:00,970 --> 00:27:02,998
No, that's just the good ones.
510
00:27:04,180 --> 00:27:06,804
Best ones twist 'em up
so damn tight
511
00:27:06,838 --> 00:27:09,704
[CHUCKLES]
you can't untie 'em.
512
00:27:10,508 --> 00:27:12,018
Me and her.
513
00:27:12,577 --> 00:27:14,183
Mm.
514
00:27:15,125 --> 00:27:17,212
It was good for a while there.
515
00:27:18,348 --> 00:27:20,125
Then it went sour.
516
00:27:20,518 --> 00:27:22,444
[SIGHS]
517
00:27:23,721 --> 00:27:25,512
Yeah, I know what you mean, Marvin.
518
00:27:25,538 --> 00:27:26,845
[CHUCKLES]
519
00:27:26,871 --> 00:27:28,346
You don't know shit.
520
00:27:29,870 --> 00:27:31,516
Don't call me "Marvin."
521
00:27:32,696 --> 00:27:34,299
I spent a year and a half
522
00:27:34,331 --> 00:27:36,707
in a lovin' relationship with that girl.
523
00:27:37,069 --> 00:27:38,516
You [CHUCKLES]
524
00:27:38,586 --> 00:27:40,023
spent the night
in a truck.
525
00:27:40,860 --> 00:27:42,214
Was one hell of a night.
526
00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:43,875
I'ma stop you right there
527
00:27:44,134 --> 00:27:46,813
'fore you make me do
somethin' I might regret.
528
00:27:47,177 --> 00:27:50,180
Why don't you just go home, Hanson, huh?
529
00:27:50,214 --> 00:27:52,907
Spend Christmas Eve with your kids.
530
00:27:53,150 --> 00:27:55,189
I'll call you when I find her.
531
00:27:56,354 --> 00:27:58,857
You'll wanna check that
answering machine 'fore you go.
532
00:27:58,889 --> 00:28:00,658
[LIQUID SWISHES]
533
00:28:02,292 --> 00:28:03,360
[BEEP]
534
00:28:03,394 --> 00:28:06,263
BOBBY JOE: Hey, Ms. Grange,
it's Bobby Joe.
535
00:28:06,297 --> 00:28:07,464
I appreciate you meetin' up with us
536
00:28:07,498 --> 00:28:09,134
with the holidays and all.
537
00:28:09,166 --> 00:28:10,268
We'll be around at the, uh...
538
00:28:10,301 --> 00:28:12,770
the radio station around
1:00 p.m. with Mr. Knox
539
00:28:12,802 --> 00:28:14,171
to go over all the paperwork.
540
00:28:14,204 --> 00:28:15,706
And, uh, thanks again, ya hear.
541
00:28:15,740 --> 00:28:16,875
[BEEP]
542
00:28:16,907 --> 00:28:17,675
HANSON: Hey, sweet potato.
543
00:28:17,708 --> 00:28:19,751
It's your sugar bear.
Rawr!
544
00:28:20,310 --> 00:28:21,812
[FAST-FORWARDING]
Skip that one.
545
00:28:21,846 --> 00:28:23,615
[CLICK, BEEP]
546
00:28:23,647 --> 00:28:26,885
SONNY: Ms. Grange,
Sonny Knox, 96.6 Radio.
547
00:28:26,917 --> 00:28:28,285
Tryin' to reach Bobby Joe.
548
00:28:28,319 --> 00:28:29,287
If you hear from him,
549
00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:31,356
please have him call
as soon as possible.
550
00:28:31,388 --> 00:28:32,723
Want to get this deal done.
551
00:28:32,749 --> 00:28:35,108
It's a great opportunity for your client
552
00:28:35,134 --> 00:28:36,261
and for me, as well.
553
00:28:36,293 --> 00:28:39,496
Thank you. Hope to see both
of you soon, counselor.
554
00:28:39,530 --> 00:28:41,566
Merry Christmas, all that jazz.
555
00:28:41,598 --> 00:28:42,634
[CLICK]
556
00:28:42,666 --> 00:28:44,040
Hm.
557
00:28:44,909 --> 00:28:47,376
Any idea who the Bobby Joe guy is?
558
00:28:47,704 --> 00:28:49,368
Number was a pay phone.
559
00:28:50,707 --> 00:28:52,299
And the Knox character?
560
00:28:52,409 --> 00:28:53,956
I left a message.
561
00:28:54,212 --> 00:28:56,736
Maybe he's celebratin' the holidays.
562
00:28:57,647 --> 00:29:00,851
I'll check him out
when I get down there, huh?
563
00:29:01,057 --> 00:29:02,858
- Hap.
- Mm-hmm?
564
00:29:11,294 --> 00:29:13,321
Go get her and bring her back.
565
00:29:14,856 --> 00:29:16,547
I'll do my best.
566
00:29:16,884 --> 00:29:18,739
That I promise you.
567
00:29:19,272 --> 00:29:20,665
I'm gonna hold you to it.
568
00:29:21,705 --> 00:29:22,940
Yeah.
569
00:29:22,973 --> 00:29:24,509
[CLICKS TONGUE]
570
00:29:25,743 --> 00:29:28,266
[BELL TOLLING]
571
00:29:28,546 --> 00:29:30,715
[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS ON TV]
572
00:29:34,518 --> 00:29:35,587
Hey.
573
00:29:35,619 --> 00:29:36,891
[INDISTINCT TALKING ON TV]
574
00:29:37,487 --> 00:29:38,455
Hey.
575
00:29:38,485 --> 00:29:40,225
- BOTH: Hey.
576
00:29:40,258 --> 00:29:41,826
♪♪
577
00:29:42,217 --> 00:29:43,320
[DOOR CLOSES]
578
00:29:47,646 --> 00:29:49,098
Leon and Clinton.
579
00:29:49,124 --> 00:29:50,293
I'll explain later.
580
00:29:50,319 --> 00:29:51,976
They're gonna watch the house
while we're gone.
581
00:29:52,002 --> 00:29:53,404
Ain't that right, boys?
582
00:29:53,436 --> 00:29:54,539
Yeah.
583
00:29:54,571 --> 00:29:56,211
Works out good, too.
584
00:29:56,237 --> 00:29:57,813
Got a ant problem at our place.
585
00:29:57,839 --> 00:29:59,146
We're better off here.
586
00:29:59,172 --> 00:30:00,611
Christmas ants, ya know?
587
00:30:00,645 --> 00:30:03,381
Uh, nope.
Not sure if I do.
588
00:30:03,414 --> 00:30:05,817
You know, those ants that only
come out at Christmastime.
589
00:30:05,849 --> 00:30:07,551
They everywhere this time of year!
590
00:30:07,585 --> 00:30:09,287
Our house is full
of those little dudes.
591
00:30:09,320 --> 00:30:10,754
Goddamn Christmas ants!
592
00:30:10,788 --> 00:30:12,857
- They red or green or...
- Nah.
593
00:30:12,889 --> 00:30:16,211
They just come out at Christmas.
They Christmas ants.
594
00:30:16,394 --> 00:30:18,429
Yeah, there's ants
in my underwear drawer.
595
00:30:18,462 --> 00:30:20,379
That's 'cause your underwear
ain't clean.
596
00:30:20,531 --> 00:30:22,300
Man, what you doin'
in my underwear drawer?
597
00:30:22,332 --> 00:30:23,834
You know they ate my banana?
598
00:30:23,915 --> 00:30:25,937
I left it on the table, and they ate it.
599
00:30:26,070 --> 00:30:28,177
[CRUNCHES]
600
00:30:28,836 --> 00:30:29,906
Right.
601
00:30:29,939 --> 00:30:31,375
Oh.
602
00:30:32,766 --> 00:30:35,187
Uh, Leonard.
We gotta go.
603
00:30:35,346 --> 00:30:37,949
You turkeys help yourself
to whatever's in the fridge.
604
00:30:37,982 --> 00:30:40,417
I counted my cookies, so hands off.
605
00:30:40,451 --> 00:30:42,287
BOTH: Yes!
606
00:30:42,320 --> 00:30:43,621
[DOOR CLOSES]
607
00:30:44,621 --> 00:30:46,757
[DOG BARKS IN DISTANCE]
608
00:30:46,791 --> 00:30:48,425
[FROG CROAKING]
609
00:30:48,458 --> 00:30:51,762
♪♪
610
00:30:54,048 --> 00:30:56,352
["LOVE TO RIDE" PLAYS]
611
00:30:56,384 --> 00:31:00,384
♪♪
612
00:31:01,395 --> 00:31:04,432
♪ Said, Lord ♪
613
00:31:04,464 --> 00:31:07,234
♪ How I love to ride ♪
614
00:31:07,268 --> 00:31:09,002
♪♪
615
00:31:09,036 --> 00:31:12,240
♪ Yes, Lord ♪
616
00:31:12,272 --> 00:31:14,908
♪ How I love to ride ♪
617
00:31:17,254 --> 00:31:22,059
♪ Over the prairie,
across to the mountainside ♪
618
00:31:22,282 --> 00:31:24,584
♪♪
619
00:31:24,617 --> 00:31:27,421
♪ I went down
to my prayin' ground ♪
620
00:31:27,453 --> 00:31:30,316
♪ Fell down on my knees ♪
621
00:31:30,491 --> 00:31:32,026
♪♪
622
00:31:32,059 --> 00:31:34,995
♪ I went down
to my prayin' ground ♪
623
00:31:35,029 --> 00:31:38,299
♪ And fell down on my knees ♪
624
00:31:38,331 --> 00:31:39,934
Mm.
625
00:31:39,966 --> 00:31:42,270
- Goddamn fly.
- ♪ I ain't cryin' for no religion ♪
626
00:31:42,302 --> 00:31:45,871
♪ Lord, give me back
my good gal, please ♪
627
00:31:46,302 --> 00:31:48,205
♪ Well ♪
628
00:31:48,309 --> 00:31:50,762
♪ Lord ♪
629
00:31:50,877 --> 00:31:53,446
♪ How I love to ride ♪
630
00:31:55,624 --> 00:31:58,160
♪ I said, Lord ♪
631
00:31:58,385 --> 00:32:00,340
_
632
00:32:00,887 --> 00:32:02,456
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
633
00:32:05,358 --> 00:32:06,526
Mornin'.
634
00:32:13,966 --> 00:32:15,043
Howdy.
635
00:32:15,069 --> 00:32:18,045
Aw, that's
a fine-lookin' man.
636
00:32:18,071 --> 00:32:20,031
Ain't he a picture, Pete?
637
00:32:20,210 --> 00:32:22,110
- Th-Thank you, ma'am.
- Yeah.
638
00:32:22,343 --> 00:32:23,708
You got a bathroom I can use?
639
00:32:23,734 --> 00:32:26,488
It's broke.
Go around behind the shack.
640
00:32:26,847 --> 00:32:27,915
Oh.
641
00:32:30,483 --> 00:32:32,686
Whatchu doin' with that cracker?
642
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:33,953
You in trouble, son?
643
00:32:33,986 --> 00:32:36,690
That is one sorry-lookin'
white boy.
644
00:32:36,723 --> 00:32:38,504
What you and him doin' together?
645
00:32:39,620 --> 00:32:40,879
Just travelin'.
646
00:32:41,032 --> 00:32:42,855
With him?
What for?
647
00:32:46,377 --> 00:32:49,711
To tell you the truth,
he had brain fever as boy.
648
00:32:49,737 --> 00:32:51,072
Ain't too bright.
649
00:32:51,571 --> 00:32:53,973
My mama used to work
for his mama when we was kids.
650
00:32:54,007 --> 00:32:57,038
When she died, we felt sorry
for him and took him in.
651
00:32:57,417 --> 00:32:58,484
Grew up together.
652
00:32:58,510 --> 00:32:59,979
Kinda feel a little sorry for him.
653
00:33:00,253 --> 00:33:01,394
- Mm.
- Mm.
654
00:33:01,420 --> 00:33:03,923
That's a lordly thing
your mama did,
655
00:33:04,050 --> 00:33:06,453
takin' in a dimwitted white boy
like that.
656
00:33:06,486 --> 00:33:07,887
- Mm-hmm.
- Yes, ma'am.
657
00:33:07,921 --> 00:33:10,857
But, you know,
I use him as a chauffeur.
658
00:33:10,890 --> 00:33:13,310
This way I can keep my eye on him.
659
00:33:13,559 --> 00:33:15,387
Keep him outta trouble.
660
00:33:16,199 --> 00:33:18,174
Bathroom's inside.
661
00:33:18,335 --> 00:33:21,017
It ain't really broke.
You need it?
662
00:33:21,902 --> 00:33:23,914
- Nice little place you got here.
- No.
663
00:33:24,320 --> 00:33:26,022
[LAUGHING] Hey.
664
00:33:26,173 --> 00:33:28,376
Them boiled peanuts?
[CHUCKLES]
665
00:33:28,408 --> 00:33:30,506
I-I ain't had boiled peanuts
666
00:33:31,480 --> 00:33:33,159
long as I can remember.
667
00:33:33,879 --> 00:33:35,817
[LID CLATTERS]
668
00:33:37,310 --> 00:33:38,872
They ain't ready yet.
669
00:33:39,193 --> 00:33:40,723
- Come here, you.
- Damn!
670
00:33:42,042 --> 00:33:43,137
Yes, ma'am.
671
00:33:48,127 --> 00:33:50,731
Your mama must've been
a saintly woman.
672
00:33:50,763 --> 00:33:52,293
Praise be to Jesus.
673
00:33:52,331 --> 00:33:53,832
Where you boys headed?
674
00:33:53,966 --> 00:33:56,169
Uh... Grovetown.
675
00:33:56,203 --> 00:33:57,637
- Grovetown?!
- Grovetown?
676
00:33:57,663 --> 00:33:59,103
- With him?!
- With him?!
677
00:33:59,572 --> 00:34:01,674
- Grovetown.
- [LAUGHING]
678
00:34:01,707 --> 00:34:03,710
[LAUGHING]
679
00:34:04,771 --> 00:34:06,840
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
680
00:34:06,866 --> 00:34:08,688
- What's so funny?
- Nothin' funny about it.
681
00:34:08,714 --> 00:34:10,990
Whoo-hoo!
Nothin' at all!
682
00:34:11,084 --> 00:34:12,920
You gonna have
a good time in Grovetown.
683
00:34:12,953 --> 00:34:14,187
- [COUGHING]
- Oh.
684
00:34:14,221 --> 00:34:15,856
They gonna love you there.
685
00:34:15,888 --> 00:34:17,824
[BOTH LAUGHING]
686
00:34:19,026 --> 00:34:20,928
- Y'all have a nice day.
- Ooh, Lord!
687
00:34:20,961 --> 00:34:22,997
[LAUGHING CONTINUES]
688
00:34:23,030 --> 00:34:24,488
Merry Christmas, now.
689
00:34:24,514 --> 00:34:26,206
- Grovetown!
- Whoo!
690
00:34:26,232 --> 00:34:27,777
[BOTH LAUGHING]
691
00:34:27,803 --> 00:34:29,206
Bless 'em.
692
00:34:30,770 --> 00:34:32,940
What'd you tell them
folks back there?
693
00:34:32,972 --> 00:34:34,442
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ON RADIO]
694
00:34:34,474 --> 00:34:35,909
Nothin'.
695
00:34:35,943 --> 00:34:37,144
♪♪
696
00:34:37,176 --> 00:34:39,677
They sure were findin'
somethin' funny.
697
00:34:40,168 --> 00:34:41,649
Yeah, well, maybe
they ain't used
698
00:34:41,682 --> 00:34:43,584
to black and white folks mixin'.
699
00:34:43,617 --> 00:34:46,074
♪♪
700
00:34:46,321 --> 00:34:49,575
Maybe when we get there,
you lay low.
701
00:34:50,351 --> 00:34:51,715
Stay in the car.
702
00:34:51,825 --> 00:34:53,503
Let me do the talkin'.
703
00:34:53,894 --> 00:34:55,229
♪♪
704
00:34:55,261 --> 00:34:57,664
Whatchu tryin' to say?
What, I can't play it cool?
705
00:34:57,698 --> 00:35:00,000
Nah. Worries me is you like
confrontation too much.
706
00:35:00,033 --> 00:35:02,903
Well, what worries me is that
you don't like it enough, Hap.
707
00:35:02,935 --> 00:35:04,262
I mean, I been in 'Nam.
708
00:35:04,638 --> 00:35:05,840
I can handle Grovetown.
709
00:35:05,872 --> 00:35:07,073
Not just Grovetown.
710
00:35:07,106 --> 00:35:09,175
It's you in Grovetown.
711
00:35:09,209 --> 00:35:10,944
Well, they don't mess with me,
I won't mess with them.
712
00:35:10,977 --> 00:35:12,579
Well, what about
when they do mess with you?
713
00:35:12,613 --> 00:35:13,681
I bear arms.
714
00:35:13,714 --> 00:35:15,216
Wrong answer.
715
00:35:15,249 --> 00:35:17,818
You know what guns means.
It just mean more guns.
716
00:35:18,176 --> 00:35:21,037
I'd rather be judged by 12
than carried by 6.
717
00:35:21,701 --> 00:35:23,757
I just wanna go down there
and find Florida, not...
718
00:35:23,789 --> 00:35:24,924
Well, me, too.
719
00:35:24,957 --> 00:35:26,260
Not have some kind of shootout
720
00:35:26,292 --> 00:35:27,928
like in the O.K. Corral.
721
00:35:27,961 --> 00:35:29,062
♪♪
722
00:35:29,095 --> 00:35:30,664
Whatchu packin' back there?
723
00:35:30,696 --> 00:35:33,566
A shotgun.
Broke it down, in plastic.
724
00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:34,868
Oh, okay.
725
00:35:34,901 --> 00:35:37,326
Couple of Winchesters,
.30-30s
726
00:35:37,703 --> 00:35:40,191
and a .45 with some ammo
in a lockbox.
727
00:35:40,406 --> 00:35:41,756
You bring the Gyrocopter?
728
00:35:42,125 --> 00:35:43,827
In the lockbox, Hap.
729
00:35:43,983 --> 00:35:45,719
- In the lockbox.
- "In the lockbox."
730
00:35:45,745 --> 00:35:48,249
♪♪
731
00:35:48,281 --> 00:35:49,917
[CROW CAWS]
732
00:35:49,950 --> 00:35:51,986
[MUSIC ON RADIO CONTINUES]
733
00:35:52,019 --> 00:35:53,654
LEONARD: Wait a minute.
734
00:35:53,687 --> 00:35:55,089
P-Pull over right here
for a second.
735
00:35:55,122 --> 00:35:56,257
HAP: Mm-hmm.
736
00:35:56,289 --> 00:35:57,690
[MUSIC STOPS]
737
00:35:57,723 --> 00:35:59,526
This here Devil's Crossing.
738
00:35:59,560 --> 00:36:01,061
[ENGINE SHUTS OFF]
Yep.
739
00:36:01,093 --> 00:36:03,030
Mm-hmm.
That's what it says.
740
00:36:03,062 --> 00:36:04,765
You don't know what this is?
741
00:36:04,798 --> 00:36:06,326
Nope.
[SCOFFS]
742
00:36:06,517 --> 00:36:08,320
But I bet you gonna tell me.
743
00:36:08,478 --> 00:36:10,613
You ain't go no damn taste in music.
744
00:36:10,803 --> 00:36:13,039
Grew up listenin' to that
Pat Boone imitation bullshit,
745
00:36:13,073 --> 00:36:15,174
then you crossed over
to that hippy-drug shit
746
00:36:15,207 --> 00:36:16,910
they was pumpin' in the '70s.
747
00:36:16,944 --> 00:36:19,453
All right, all right.
So, tell me.
748
00:36:19,713 --> 00:36:21,582
What is the Devil's Crossroads?
749
00:36:23,350 --> 00:36:26,319
Well, legend has it,
old blues man came here
750
00:36:26,352 --> 00:36:28,027
and sold his soul to the Devil,
751
00:36:28,053 --> 00:36:29,905
right here in this spot.
752
00:36:29,931 --> 00:36:33,102
They ate each other's turds,
sucked each other's carrots,
753
00:36:33,327 --> 00:36:35,451
some hocus pocus crap like that.
754
00:36:36,629 --> 00:36:38,164
Anyway, that old boy became
755
00:36:38,198 --> 00:36:40,200
the greatest blues man ever lived.
756
00:36:42,135 --> 00:36:44,071
I thought that was Bobby Johnson.
757
00:36:44,104 --> 00:36:45,705
Oh, no!
He just stoled it from him!
758
00:36:45,738 --> 00:36:47,206
Well, who the hell was it, then?
759
00:36:47,240 --> 00:36:49,008
Boy named L.C. Soothe.
760
00:36:49,042 --> 00:36:50,210
Oh.
761
00:36:50,243 --> 00:36:51,779
[SIGHS]
762
00:36:51,812 --> 00:36:54,615
Uncle Chester said
he went to see him as a kid.
763
00:36:54,647 --> 00:36:56,171
Sparks shot off from his fingers.
764
00:36:56,197 --> 00:36:58,051
- HAP: Oh, get outta here.
- Eyes glowed yellow
765
00:36:58,084 --> 00:37:00,007
as he choked on that old guitar.
766
00:37:00,187 --> 00:37:01,562
Well...
767
00:37:01,762 --> 00:37:05,405
I gotta admit, Hap.
I ain't never heard of him.
768
00:37:05,635 --> 00:37:07,391
Yeah, you ain't the only one.
769
00:37:08,748 --> 00:37:12,483
Any blues fan worth his salt
know who L.C. Soothe is, though.
770
00:37:15,234 --> 00:37:18,499
[CROWS CAWING]
771
00:37:18,705 --> 00:37:20,682
- Say, Hap.
- Mm-hmm.
772
00:37:20,891 --> 00:37:22,765
What would you sell your soul for?
773
00:37:25,211 --> 00:37:27,960
If I said world peace,
you'd only call me a hippie.
774
00:37:28,827 --> 00:37:30,433
You are a hippie.
775
00:37:30,883 --> 00:37:32,785
Hippie mixed
with old-ass hippie.
776
00:37:32,819 --> 00:37:34,650
[CHUCKLES]
777
00:37:35,166 --> 00:37:36,523
What about you?
778
00:37:36,724 --> 00:37:38,417
Oh, that's easy.
779
00:37:38,732 --> 00:37:41,093
Endless supply
of Nilla Wafers,
780
00:37:41,119 --> 00:37:42,369
ocean full o' Dr. P.
781
00:37:42,395 --> 00:37:44,131
[LAUGHS]
782
00:37:45,698 --> 00:37:48,749
Oh, we sound like
a couple old farts.
783
00:37:50,867 --> 00:37:52,659
Don't you even think about it.
784
00:37:52,939 --> 00:37:54,107
Your butt feel like yodeling,
785
00:37:54,140 --> 00:37:56,409
you better pull over
and let it out.
786
00:37:56,443 --> 00:37:57,910
Hey.
[TIRES SQUEALING]
787
00:37:57,944 --> 00:37:59,179
What's his game?
788
00:37:59,211 --> 00:38:01,914
The hell?
I don't know.
789
00:38:01,948 --> 00:38:03,417
Damn, he's close.
790
00:38:03,450 --> 00:38:04,759
The hell?
791
00:38:05,685 --> 00:38:08,283
What's he want?
Come on! Pass!
792
00:38:08,921 --> 00:38:11,891
[ENGINE REVS, TIRES SQUEAL]
793
00:38:11,924 --> 00:38:13,660
♪ TENSION BUILDING ♪
794
00:38:13,694 --> 00:38:15,757
HAP: What the hell?
795
00:38:15,928 --> 00:38:18,655
♪♪
796
00:38:20,167 --> 00:38:23,037
[SPITS]
797
00:38:23,069 --> 00:38:24,104
Man!
798
00:38:24,136 --> 00:38:25,759
[LAUGHS]
[ENGINE REVS]
799
00:38:27,753 --> 00:38:30,040
Well, that was neighborly.
800
00:38:30,276 --> 00:38:31,912
[BUTTON CLICKS]
801
00:38:31,944 --> 00:38:34,113
[WIPERS SQUEAK]
802
00:38:34,147 --> 00:38:36,283
Well, maybe we should think
about keeping them guns
803
00:38:36,316 --> 00:38:38,787
up front from now on, huh?
804
00:38:39,090 --> 00:38:43,090
_
805
00:38:48,600 --> 00:38:51,225
♪ GLOOMY MUSIC ♪
806
00:38:56,453 --> 00:38:57,739
[BELL RINGING]
807
00:38:57,765 --> 00:38:59,891
SONNY KNOX OVER THE RADIO:
Merry Christmas, East Texas.
808
00:38:59,917 --> 00:39:02,905
That was a sweet one
from Frog Eyes Johnson,
809
00:39:02,931 --> 00:39:05,834
and you're listenin' to 96.6,
810
00:39:06,024 --> 00:39:09,027
Your Blues Fix,
where the blues never die.
811
00:39:09,060 --> 00:39:11,996
Here's an old classic to put
some bounce in your mistletoe.
812
00:39:12,029 --> 00:39:14,365
♪ Ding, ding, dong
what a big parade ♪
813
00:39:14,399 --> 00:39:15,667
♪ Ding, ding, dong ♪
814
00:39:15,701 --> 00:39:18,003
- ♪ What a big parade ♪
- So much for bad, old Grovetown.
815
00:39:18,036 --> 00:39:19,405
♪ Ding, ding, dong
what a big parade ♪
816
00:39:19,437 --> 00:39:22,587
Place look like a goddamn
Hallmark card.
817
00:39:22,882 --> 00:39:25,016
I don't see any black folk, though.
818
00:39:25,042 --> 00:39:26,044
You noticed, huh?
819
00:39:26,078 --> 00:39:27,379
Mm-hmm.
820
00:39:27,411 --> 00:39:30,381
Keep expectin' Rod Serling
to pop out any minute
821
00:39:30,415 --> 00:39:32,317
and give us the damn lowdown.
[CHUCKLES]
822
00:39:32,350 --> 00:39:34,651
You've crossed over to...
823
00:39:34,905 --> 00:39:36,422
"The Twilight Zone."
"The Twilight Zone."
824
00:39:36,455 --> 00:39:38,097
[BOTH LAUGH]
825
00:39:38,390 --> 00:39:40,101
♪♪
826
00:39:40,127 --> 00:39:41,963
[CAR HORN BLARES]
827
00:39:42,261 --> 00:39:43,757
Ho, ho, ho!
828
00:39:43,783 --> 00:39:45,598
♪ The north wind says
it's going to snow ♪
829
00:39:45,630 --> 00:39:47,266
[COIN CLINKS]
Merry Christmas.
830
00:39:47,299 --> 00:39:49,335
♪ The north wind says
it's going to snow ♪
831
00:39:49,368 --> 00:39:51,904
♪ The north wind says
it's going to snow ♪
832
00:39:51,937 --> 00:39:54,351
♪ And paint
the whole world white ♪
833
00:39:54,672 --> 00:39:58,397
♪♪
834
00:40:01,212 --> 00:40:03,648
_
835
00:40:07,451 --> 00:40:09,686
[MUSIC FADES]
836
00:40:09,991 --> 00:40:11,556
Who the hell
are they supposed to be?
837
00:40:11,589 --> 00:40:12,658
- What, them?
- Yeah.
838
00:40:12,690 --> 00:40:14,428
That's the Three Wise Men.
839
00:40:14,525 --> 00:40:16,966
Look more like
the Three Ken Dolls to me.
840
00:40:17,261 --> 00:40:19,530
Three whitest black people
I ever seen.
841
00:40:19,563 --> 00:40:21,033
Hey, now.
Behave, Leonard.
842
00:40:21,059 --> 00:40:22,760
Aw, come on.
They got a blonde wig on Mary.
843
00:40:22,786 --> 00:40:25,994
- I said behave.
- WOMAN: Can I help you?
844
00:40:31,346 --> 00:40:33,498
[BUTTON CLICKS]
I'm afraid we're all booked up.
845
00:40:33,914 --> 00:40:36,621
The holidays.
You know how it is.
846
00:40:36,647 --> 00:40:39,230
I sure do know how it is.
847
00:40:39,650 --> 00:40:41,620
Uh, ma'am, we were wondering
848
00:40:41,652 --> 00:40:44,177
if this, uh... this woman
was stayin' here.
849
00:40:44,906 --> 00:40:46,675
Her name is Florida Grange.
850
00:40:49,401 --> 00:40:51,900
Nobody by that name
is stayin' here.
851
00:40:52,230 --> 00:40:54,233
Nobody by that color either, I bet.
852
00:40:54,266 --> 00:40:55,234
[KICKS LEONARD]
[GRUNTS]
853
00:40:55,266 --> 00:40:56,268
We don't take kindly
854
00:40:56,301 --> 00:40:58,932
to smart mouths around here.
855
00:40:59,203 --> 00:41:01,472
Now, I told you
that lady is not here,
856
00:41:01,505 --> 00:41:04,042
so I'm gonna have to
ask you to leave.
857
00:41:04,076 --> 00:41:05,064
Oh.
858
00:41:05,090 --> 00:41:07,932
I got church service to go to,
and I have to lock up.
859
00:41:07,958 --> 00:41:10,494
Well, we hope you have
a nice day, ma'am, and...
860
00:41:10,582 --> 00:41:13,217
and thank you
so much for your help.
861
00:41:14,219 --> 00:41:16,653
[BELLS JINGLE, DOOR CLOSES]
862
00:41:17,089 --> 00:41:18,489
[BUTTON CLICKS]
863
00:41:18,529 --> 00:41:20,565
Why don't you just
kiss her ass cheeks?
864
00:41:20,591 --> 00:41:22,360
Massage her feet
while you're at it?
865
00:41:22,393 --> 00:41:24,096
Well, I find you get more
with a little sugar
866
00:41:24,129 --> 00:41:25,596
than vinegar, Leonard.
867
00:41:25,629 --> 00:41:27,098
Yeah, well, I was usin' brown sugar.
868
00:41:27,132 --> 00:41:28,334
That always gets me
what I want.
869
00:41:28,366 --> 00:41:30,125
- Ladies.
- Strange.
870
00:41:30,305 --> 00:41:32,073
It's almost as if she didn't like you.
871
00:41:32,099 --> 00:41:33,968
Maybe it was this sexy vest
I was wearin'.
872
00:41:34,172 --> 00:41:35,507
Oh, personally,
I've always found that vest
873
00:41:35,540 --> 00:41:37,656
a little [HUFFS] scary on you.
874
00:41:38,197 --> 00:41:39,794
You check out her hairdo?
875
00:41:40,511 --> 00:41:42,680
Lady gotta have
one heck of a strong neck
876
00:41:42,714 --> 00:41:44,315
to hold that shit up.
[CHUCKLES]
877
00:41:44,341 --> 00:41:45,510
You see the part
where it was braided?
878
00:41:45,536 --> 00:41:48,031
- It looked like a little butthole.
- Oh, gave you a little flutter, huh?
879
00:41:48,064 --> 00:41:49,721
Ha ha, very funny.
[CHUCKLES]
880
00:41:49,754 --> 00:41:50,823
Let's just find Florida,
881
00:41:50,855 --> 00:41:53,058
get out of white-man fantasy
before "Matlock" come on
882
00:41:53,091 --> 00:41:54,058
and you can't find nobody.
[HORN HONKS]
883
00:41:54,091 --> 00:41:55,192
I don't know.
884
00:41:55,218 --> 00:41:57,424
I'm beginning to appreciate
the quaintness of this town.
885
00:41:57,549 --> 00:41:59,131
Why don't you just move here?
886
00:41:59,431 --> 00:42:03,431
♪♪
887
00:42:10,341 --> 00:42:11,988
Or maybe not.
888
00:42:12,243 --> 00:42:15,416
♪ SOMBER MUSIC ♪
889
00:42:19,611 --> 00:42:22,596
Startin' to get that
"Twilight zone" feeling again.
890
00:42:22,622 --> 00:42:24,846
This season on
Hap and Leonard.
891
00:42:25,096 --> 00:42:26,948
We lookin' for Florida Grange.
892
00:42:26,974 --> 00:42:28,791
Nobody knows where she is.
893
00:42:28,817 --> 00:42:30,995
I'm the law and you best
remember that.
894
00:42:31,021 --> 00:42:33,565
Sorry I got you into this mess Leonard.
895
00:42:33,591 --> 00:42:35,974
- ***
- Finish what we started.
896
00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:38,517
If you still here tomorrow,
don't say I didn't warn you.
897
00:42:40,031 --> 00:42:43,945
Synced and corrected by LittleDuck
www.addic7ed.com
61272
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