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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,523 --> 00:00:02,539 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:04,106 --> 00:00:05,606 ADULT SHELDON: On any given day, 3 00:00:05,609 --> 00:00:07,473 our school gymnasium 4 00:00:07,476 --> 00:00:09,968 presented a cocktail of horrors. 5 00:00:09,971 --> 00:00:11,257 [SCREAMS] 6 00:00:11,260 --> 00:00:13,703 From daily humiliation... 7 00:00:16,295 --> 00:00:18,762 to school-sanctioned violence... 8 00:00:18,764 --> 00:00:19,804 BOY: Oh! 9 00:00:19,807 --> 00:00:23,450 But one day a year, the gymnasium was transformed 10 00:00:23,453 --> 00:00:25,535 into a haven of learning 11 00:00:25,537 --> 00:00:27,904 thanks to a remarkable institution 12 00:00:27,906 --> 00:00:29,973 known as the science fair. 13 00:00:29,975 --> 00:00:32,879 A chance for the student body to come together 14 00:00:32,882 --> 00:00:34,929 in the name of research and progress. 15 00:00:34,932 --> 00:00:37,341 Uh, while some did the bare minimum... 16 00:00:37,344 --> 00:00:38,677 [BURPS] 17 00:00:39,531 --> 00:00:43,609 and others preferred razzamatazz over raw data, 18 00:00:43,612 --> 00:00:47,891 I set out to save humanity from deadly asteroids. 19 00:00:47,893 --> 00:00:51,342 And made it all neatly fit on three poster boards. 20 00:00:51,343 --> 00:00:53,876 The science fair may be a competition, 21 00:00:53,879 --> 00:00:57,614 but when the goal is promoting knowledge, we're all winners. 22 00:00:57,617 --> 00:00:58,700 PETERSEN: And the winner 23 00:00:58,703 --> 00:01:01,605 of the Medford High School Science Fair is... 24 00:01:01,607 --> 00:01:03,940 SueAnn Ludlow! 25 00:01:03,942 --> 00:01:05,895 You've got to be kidding me! 26 00:01:05,898 --> 00:01:06,973 Shelly. 27 00:01:06,976 --> 00:01:08,075 [APPLAUSE] 28 00:01:08,078 --> 00:01:09,744 You people are crazy! 29 00:01:09,747 --> 00:01:10,744 - Hey. - All right. 30 00:01:10,747 --> 00:01:13,374 SHELDON: You're celebrating mediocrity! 31 00:01:13,377 --> 00:01:14,943 Mediocrity! 32 00:01:15,048 --> 00:01:16,882 Mediocrity! 33 00:01:18,223 --> 00:01:21,024 ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ 34 00:01:21,027 --> 00:01:23,820 ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪ 35 00:01:23,823 --> 00:01:26,424 ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪ 36 00:01:26,427 --> 00:01:29,457 ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ 37 00:01:29,460 --> 00:01:35,375 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com -- 38 00:01:35,378 --> 00:01:37,240 I'll be in my room. 39 00:01:37,242 --> 00:01:38,739 Oh, come on, Shelly. 40 00:01:38,742 --> 00:01:40,243 You still got an honorable mention. 41 00:01:40,245 --> 00:01:41,878 Stop reminding me. 42 00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:43,080 [SIGHS] 43 00:01:43,082 --> 00:01:45,282 I hate to see him so upset. 44 00:01:45,284 --> 00:01:47,718 Well, give him a little time, he'll calm down. 45 00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:48,885 [DOOR SLAMS] 46 00:01:48,887 --> 00:01:50,469 SHELDON: Fiddle-faddle! 47 00:01:50,472 --> 00:01:51,638 The F word. 48 00:01:51,641 --> 00:01:52,766 He's real mad. 49 00:01:52,769 --> 00:01:54,902 You don't always win in life, he needs to learn that. 50 00:01:54,905 --> 00:01:57,531 I know, but these are big feelings for a little boy. 51 00:01:57,534 --> 00:01:59,095 They're feelings everybody has. 52 00:01:59,098 --> 00:02:00,564 It's part of growing up. 53 00:02:00,566 --> 00:02:01,698 I guess. 54 00:02:01,700 --> 00:02:03,500 SHELDON: Poodle poop! 55 00:02:03,502 --> 00:02:04,601 MEEMAW: Okay. 56 00:02:04,603 --> 00:02:06,670 Somebody's got to teach this kid to swear, 57 00:02:06,672 --> 00:02:08,045 it's embarrassing. 58 00:02:13,078 --> 00:02:15,045 Sheldon, listen, 59 00:02:15,047 --> 00:02:16,413 I know losing ain't easy. 60 00:02:16,415 --> 00:02:18,802 I deal with it on the football field all the time. 61 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:20,550 [CHUCKLES] 62 00:02:22,387 --> 00:02:26,022 It's like that big game we had last year against Nacogdoches. 63 00:02:26,024 --> 00:02:29,430 We were down 28 points at the half. 64 00:02:29,433 --> 00:02:31,360 It was raining, it was muddy. 65 00:02:31,363 --> 00:02:33,563 Everybody in the stands had gone home. 66 00:02:33,565 --> 00:02:35,866 But somehow, we managed to claw our way back 67 00:02:35,868 --> 00:02:37,701 to a tie with a minute left. 68 00:02:37,703 --> 00:02:39,820 And then, they threw a Hail Mary, 69 00:02:39,823 --> 00:02:41,271 and the receiver stepped out of bounds, 70 00:02:41,273 --> 00:02:43,273 but the ref didn't see it. 71 00:02:43,275 --> 00:02:47,744 After all that, we lose on a bad call. 72 00:02:47,746 --> 00:02:50,847 Believe me, I was furious. 73 00:02:50,849 --> 00:02:52,945 But I sucked it up, 74 00:02:52,948 --> 00:02:56,953 and I walked across that field and I shook their hands. 75 00:02:56,956 --> 00:03:00,117 I didn't hear a word you said. 76 00:03:01,759 --> 00:03:03,759 Okay. 77 00:03:03,762 --> 00:03:06,496 So while an animal cell has a membrane, 78 00:03:06,498 --> 00:03:09,599 a plant cell has a membrane and a cell wall. 79 00:03:09,601 --> 00:03:11,301 SHELDON: Who cares? 80 00:03:11,303 --> 00:03:12,936 Sheldon, what are you doing? 81 00:03:12,938 --> 00:03:14,971 Being disrespectful, sir. 82 00:03:14,973 --> 00:03:16,414 Ah. How come? 83 00:03:16,417 --> 00:03:19,509 Because I'm disillusioned with the school system. 84 00:03:19,511 --> 00:03:22,179 Georgie, do you know what's going on with him? 85 00:03:22,181 --> 00:03:24,548 Actually, I'm trying to ignore it. 86 00:03:24,550 --> 00:03:26,649 Well, get your feet off the desk. 87 00:03:26,652 --> 00:03:28,320 What if I don't? 88 00:03:28,323 --> 00:03:30,914 I was sent to see Principal Petersen. 89 00:03:30,917 --> 00:03:32,422 What is it this time? 90 00:03:32,425 --> 00:03:33,742 Youthful rebellion. 91 00:03:33,745 --> 00:03:36,758 My voice hasn't changed yet, but my attitude has. 92 00:03:36,761 --> 00:03:38,294 I'll let him know you're here. 93 00:03:38,297 --> 00:03:40,097 You do that. 94 00:03:40,100 --> 00:03:41,733 Ma'am. 95 00:03:44,269 --> 00:03:46,169 [DOOR CLOSES] 96 00:03:46,801 --> 00:03:48,334 Sheldon Cooper's outside. 97 00:03:48,337 --> 00:03:50,371 Who sent him now? 98 00:03:50,374 --> 00:03:52,255 - Givens. - Well, you know what? 99 00:03:52,258 --> 00:03:54,211 Givens needs to man up. 100 00:03:54,214 --> 00:03:55,413 Cooper's a little boy. 101 00:03:55,416 --> 00:03:56,844 It's not hard to handle him. 102 00:03:56,847 --> 00:03:57,828 I'll send him in. 103 00:03:57,831 --> 00:03:59,564 H-Hold on a minute, just... 104 00:03:59,567 --> 00:04:01,033 Does he know I'm in here? 105 00:04:01,036 --> 00:04:03,891 SHELDON [OVER P.A.]: Attention, students and faculty. 106 00:04:03,894 --> 00:04:05,193 Oh, no. 107 00:04:05,196 --> 00:04:07,172 This is Sheldon Lee Cooper. 108 00:04:07,175 --> 00:04:08,992 What the hell? 109 00:04:10,074 --> 00:04:13,461 We're taught that hard work pays off, but that's not true. 110 00:04:13,464 --> 00:04:15,330 I came up with a solution to save Earth 111 00:04:15,333 --> 00:04:16,802 from killer asteroids, 112 00:04:16,805 --> 00:04:18,719 and lost the science fair 113 00:04:18,722 --> 00:04:21,637 to SueAnn Ludlow, and her frizzy hair machine. 114 00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:24,808 But it wasn't just me who lost, we all lost. 115 00:04:24,810 --> 00:04:26,232 Wake up, people. 116 00:04:26,235 --> 00:04:28,375 The system's broken. 117 00:04:28,378 --> 00:04:30,545 Real innovation isn't valued. 118 00:04:30,548 --> 00:04:33,749 Nowadays, it's all about flash and style. 119 00:04:33,752 --> 00:04:35,052 I blame MTV. 120 00:04:35,055 --> 00:04:37,855 Luckily, my parents can't afford cable. 121 00:04:37,858 --> 00:04:40,492 We can afford it. 122 00:04:40,495 --> 00:04:42,758 I urge you all to rise up. 123 00:04:42,761 --> 00:04:43,927 [GRUNTS] 124 00:04:43,929 --> 00:04:46,196 They can't send everyone to the principal's office. 125 00:04:46,198 --> 00:04:48,825 Chew gum in class, use a number one pencil, 126 00:04:48,828 --> 00:04:50,094 go nuts. 127 00:04:50,097 --> 00:04:51,935 This is Sheldon Lee Cooper signing off. 128 00:04:51,937 --> 00:04:54,028 Live long and prosper. 129 00:04:54,031 --> 00:04:55,764 You better run, you little punk! 130 00:04:57,042 --> 00:04:59,276 [GRUNTING] 131 00:04:59,278 --> 00:05:02,399 MEEMAW: I can't believe you sent him to bed without his dinner. 132 00:05:02,402 --> 00:05:03,525 That's right. 133 00:05:03,528 --> 00:05:05,027 On spaghetti and hot dog night. 134 00:05:05,030 --> 00:05:06,730 - That's rough. - He's got to learn. 135 00:05:06,733 --> 00:05:08,711 Let's talk about something else. 136 00:05:08,714 --> 00:05:10,413 Georgie, how was your day? 137 00:05:10,416 --> 00:05:13,150 My brother told the entire school we can't afford cable. 138 00:05:13,153 --> 00:05:14,391 Oh, right. 139 00:05:14,393 --> 00:05:15,625 Missy? 140 00:05:15,627 --> 00:05:18,061 Good, until I learned we can't afford cable. 141 00:05:18,064 --> 00:05:19,782 [SIGHS] 142 00:05:19,785 --> 00:05:22,765 I've been thinking, and there's something I'd like to say. 143 00:05:22,768 --> 00:05:25,168 Unless it's an apology, I don't want to hear it. 144 00:05:25,170 --> 00:05:27,771 I'm quitting science. 145 00:05:27,773 --> 00:05:29,797 Not an apology. 146 00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:31,586 Spank him, Dad. 147 00:05:36,601 --> 00:05:39,046 I'm really getting worried about Shelly. 148 00:05:39,049 --> 00:05:41,249 Acting out, and now quitting science? 149 00:05:41,251 --> 00:05:43,418 Oh, I'm sure he'll get right back to it. 150 00:05:43,420 --> 00:05:46,254 I've quit smoking and gambling plenty of times. 151 00:05:46,256 --> 00:05:47,889 - Hmm. - Look in my purse. 152 00:05:47,892 --> 00:05:50,607 Nothing but cigarettes and scratchers. [LAUGHS] 153 00:05:50,610 --> 00:05:52,556 [SIGHS] Maybe he should talk to somebody. 154 00:05:52,559 --> 00:05:53,795 Not it. 155 00:05:53,797 --> 00:05:55,939 I meant a professional, George. 156 00:05:55,942 --> 00:05:57,657 But way to be a dad. 157 00:06:06,677 --> 00:06:08,443 [DOOR OPENS] 158 00:06:08,445 --> 00:06:10,126 Hey. [CHUCKLES] 159 00:06:10,129 --> 00:06:11,429 Welcome back. 160 00:06:11,432 --> 00:06:13,866 Thank you for seeing us on such short notice, Doctor. 161 00:06:13,869 --> 00:06:15,157 Oh, not a problem. 162 00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:16,259 Sheldon, 163 00:06:16,262 --> 00:06:17,415 I remember you. 164 00:06:17,418 --> 00:06:18,619 Do you remember me? 165 00:06:18,622 --> 00:06:20,455 I remember everything. 166 00:06:20,457 --> 00:06:21,923 Okay. 167 00:06:21,925 --> 00:06:23,558 Uh, you two, make yourselves comfortable. 168 00:06:23,560 --> 00:06:25,060 Me and my main man Sheldon are gonna go 169 00:06:25,062 --> 00:06:26,728 have a little chitchat in my office. 170 00:06:26,730 --> 00:06:29,431 I don't like chitchat, and I'm not your main man. 171 00:06:29,433 --> 00:06:31,118 Right on. 172 00:06:31,121 --> 00:06:32,399 Have fun. 173 00:06:34,104 --> 00:06:35,712 [DOOR CLOSES] 174 00:06:35,715 --> 00:06:37,985 Now, Sheldon, I understand you've changed your mind 175 00:06:37,988 --> 00:06:39,907 about being a scientist. 176 00:06:39,910 --> 00:06:42,277 And you're gonna say I can't? 177 00:06:42,279 --> 00:06:44,246 No. I think that's great. 178 00:06:44,248 --> 00:06:46,016 - You do? - Yeah. 179 00:06:46,019 --> 00:06:48,454 I think it's important to keep your options open. 180 00:06:48,457 --> 00:06:49,890 Let me tell you a little story 181 00:06:49,893 --> 00:06:52,220 about an extremely smart young boy. 182 00:06:52,223 --> 00:06:53,489 Me? 183 00:06:53,492 --> 00:06:54,761 Me. 184 00:06:54,764 --> 00:06:55,868 For the longest time, 185 00:06:55,871 --> 00:06:56,903 I thought I was gonna be 186 00:06:56,906 --> 00:06:58,539 a professional figure skater. 187 00:06:58,542 --> 00:07:01,529 And then you became disenchanted with the field like I did? 188 00:07:01,532 --> 00:07:02,497 Exactly. 189 00:07:02,499 --> 00:07:04,433 Someone skated right over my foot. 190 00:07:04,435 --> 00:07:05,600 And that was that. 191 00:07:05,602 --> 00:07:07,947 I'm not sure that's the same thing. 192 00:07:07,950 --> 00:07:12,373 I'd say you lost your passion the way I lost my big toe. 193 00:07:12,376 --> 00:07:13,877 Hmm. 194 00:07:17,681 --> 00:07:20,015 Don't draw in that. 195 00:07:20,017 --> 00:07:22,250 Hey. We're all done. 196 00:07:22,252 --> 00:07:24,319 - How'd it go? - Great. 197 00:07:24,321 --> 00:07:25,783 I feel a lot better. 198 00:07:25,786 --> 00:07:27,688 Well, that's just wonderful. 199 00:07:27,691 --> 00:07:29,458 So, you're going back to science? 200 00:07:29,460 --> 00:07:33,261 No. In fact, I'm going as far away from science as possible. 201 00:07:33,263 --> 00:07:35,163 I plan to pursue the arts. 202 00:07:35,165 --> 00:07:36,720 What kind of arts? 203 00:07:36,723 --> 00:07:38,790 I've decided to become an actor. 204 00:07:38,793 --> 00:07:42,002 Of course you have. 205 00:07:44,141 --> 00:07:46,541 Why's he want to study acting? 206 00:07:46,543 --> 00:07:49,244 The doctor encouraged him to try something different. 207 00:07:49,246 --> 00:07:50,963 Maybe he'll learn to act normal. 208 00:07:50,966 --> 00:07:52,699 How about you learn to act nice? 209 00:07:52,702 --> 00:07:55,616 You people don't appreciate my sense of humor. 210 00:07:55,619 --> 00:07:57,603 As long as he starts behaving himself in school, 211 00:07:57,606 --> 00:07:59,573 I don't care what he does. 212 00:07:59,576 --> 00:08:02,009 You know, I actually did a little community theater 213 00:08:02,012 --> 00:08:03,330 back in my 20s. 214 00:08:03,333 --> 00:08:04,432 Is that so? 215 00:08:04,435 --> 00:08:06,447 I had a good part in Oklahoma. 216 00:08:06,450 --> 00:08:09,730 ♪ I'm just a girl who can't say no. ♪ 217 00:08:09,733 --> 00:08:10,752 Say no to what? 218 00:08:10,755 --> 00:08:11,767 Well... 219 00:08:11,770 --> 00:08:13,869 To, uh, eating her vegetables. 220 00:08:13,872 --> 00:08:15,772 It was fun. 221 00:08:15,775 --> 00:08:17,541 But I'm pretty sure doing plays 222 00:08:17,544 --> 00:08:20,674 is just an excuse to change in front of each other backstage. 223 00:08:20,677 --> 00:08:22,205 - Really? - Yeah. 224 00:08:22,208 --> 00:08:24,877 Theater folk just love to take their clothes off. 225 00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:26,384 How many people saw you naked? 226 00:08:26,387 --> 00:08:27,465 A lot. 227 00:08:27,468 --> 00:08:28,916 - Mom. - Enough. 228 00:08:28,919 --> 00:08:30,585 Y'all don't understand 229 00:08:30,587 --> 00:08:32,306 my sense of humor, either. 230 00:08:35,955 --> 00:08:38,289 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 231 00:08:41,587 --> 00:08:43,885 Hello. Are you Mr. Lundy? 232 00:08:43,888 --> 00:08:45,955 My father is Mr. Lundy. 233 00:08:45,958 --> 00:08:47,925 Well, then what should I call you? 234 00:08:49,791 --> 00:08:51,224 I guess Mr. Lundy. 235 00:08:51,227 --> 00:08:53,073 My father's dead. [LAUGHS] 236 00:08:53,076 --> 00:08:56,072 I was told you're the head of the drama department. 237 00:08:56,075 --> 00:08:58,611 Mm-hmm, and the girls' volleyball coach, 238 00:08:58,614 --> 00:09:01,882 which, between us, is the real drama department. 239 00:09:01,885 --> 00:09:03,151 Was that a joke? 240 00:09:03,154 --> 00:09:05,154 I thought so. 241 00:09:06,622 --> 00:09:08,522 Can I help you? 242 00:09:08,525 --> 00:09:11,197 I'm interested in becoming an actor. 243 00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:12,994 Well, good for you. 244 00:09:12,997 --> 00:09:14,694 You've come to the right place. 245 00:09:14,697 --> 00:09:17,127 You know, I-I've been a professional actor 246 00:09:17,130 --> 00:09:18,430 for years and years. 247 00:09:18,433 --> 00:09:20,233 Really? What have you been in? 248 00:09:20,236 --> 00:09:22,736 Well, have you seen the mattress madness commercials 249 00:09:22,739 --> 00:09:24,338 on channel 68? 250 00:09:24,341 --> 00:09:26,916 I'm soft and firm 251 00:09:26,919 --> 00:09:29,306 in all the right places. 252 00:09:31,822 --> 00:09:33,486 Wow. You're famous. 253 00:09:33,489 --> 00:09:34,822 Well, I... 254 00:09:34,825 --> 00:09:37,225 And I was Carbucketty 255 00:09:37,228 --> 00:09:40,062 in the Dallas-Fort Worth Players production of Cats. 256 00:09:40,065 --> 00:09:41,164 [PURRS] 257 00:09:41,167 --> 00:09:43,000 [LAUGHS] Did you see that? 258 00:09:43,003 --> 00:09:44,845 No, I'm afraid of cats. 259 00:09:44,848 --> 00:09:47,509 Well, you realize the cats are just the actors. 260 00:09:47,512 --> 00:09:48,878 I still wouldn't risk it. 261 00:09:48,881 --> 00:09:51,749 You're an odd boy, but you make it work. 262 00:09:51,752 --> 00:09:52,951 [CHUCKLES] 263 00:09:52,954 --> 00:09:55,087 Anyway, uh, auditions are next week. 264 00:09:55,090 --> 00:09:57,056 - You're welcome to come on by. - Excellent. 265 00:09:57,059 --> 00:09:58,692 I checked out a book on acting 266 00:09:58,695 --> 00:10:00,641 so I should have the hang of it by then. 267 00:10:00,644 --> 00:10:02,838 Well, I like that confidence. 268 00:10:02,841 --> 00:10:06,018 Thank you. Most people find it off-putting. 269 00:10:06,021 --> 00:10:08,722 I can see that. 270 00:10:10,988 --> 00:10:14,361 ADULT SHELDON: To master acting, I immersed myself 271 00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:18,025 in all forms of the genre, from silent films 272 00:10:18,028 --> 00:10:21,763 to modern classics... 273 00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:31,072 to logic-defying experimental work. 274 00:10:31,075 --> 00:10:33,242 ♪ It's great to stay up late... ♪ 275 00:10:33,245 --> 00:10:34,644 Why are they all singing? 276 00:10:34,647 --> 00:10:36,783 [MOUTH FULL]: Because it's a musical. 277 00:10:36,786 --> 00:10:38,705 But why can't they just say it? 278 00:10:38,708 --> 00:10:42,010 Well, that wouldn't be very musical, would it? 279 00:10:42,013 --> 00:10:43,963 ♪ The stars were shining bright... ♪ 280 00:10:43,966 --> 00:10:45,986 And where is the music coming from? 281 00:10:45,989 --> 00:10:48,845 You're thinking about it too much. 282 00:10:48,848 --> 00:10:50,288 ♪ So, good morning ♪ 283 00:10:50,291 --> 00:10:52,325 ♪ Good morning... ♪ 284 00:10:52,328 --> 00:10:54,551 And how do they all know the same dance? 285 00:10:54,554 --> 00:10:56,308 - Come on. - Moonpie. 286 00:10:56,311 --> 00:10:58,457 ♪ To you and you and you and you. ♪ 287 00:10:58,460 --> 00:11:00,335 ANNOUNCER: And it is intercepted. 288 00:11:00,337 --> 00:11:03,504 Walking in is Kevin Smith for the touchdown. 289 00:11:06,276 --> 00:11:08,209 What are you looking for? 290 00:11:08,211 --> 00:11:09,715 A brooch. 291 00:11:09,718 --> 00:11:11,251 What's a brooch? 292 00:11:11,254 --> 00:11:13,053 It's a piece of jewelry. 293 00:11:13,056 --> 00:11:15,496 In my acting book, there's an exercise 294 00:11:15,499 --> 00:11:18,485 where you look for a missing brooch in a convincing way. 295 00:11:18,488 --> 00:11:19,473 Why? 296 00:11:19,476 --> 00:11:21,988 According to the story, it was given to me by a friend 297 00:11:21,991 --> 00:11:25,368 so I could afford to stay in drama school, but now it's gone. 298 00:11:25,371 --> 00:11:27,668 Well, good luck finding it. 299 00:11:27,671 --> 00:11:28,970 Thanks. 300 00:11:28,973 --> 00:11:30,372 Wait. 301 00:11:30,375 --> 00:11:33,510 You really believed I was looking for something. 302 00:11:34,296 --> 00:11:35,551 I did it. 303 00:11:35,554 --> 00:11:36,896 I'm an actor. 304 00:11:36,898 --> 00:11:38,331 You're a freak. 305 00:11:39,501 --> 00:11:42,488 Oh, where the heck is that brooch? 306 00:11:44,530 --> 00:11:46,259 GIRL: If I can change, 307 00:11:46,262 --> 00:11:48,041 and you can change, 308 00:11:48,043 --> 00:11:50,743 everybody can change. 309 00:11:50,745 --> 00:11:52,501 Thank you, Eva. 310 00:11:52,504 --> 00:11:56,854 That was a-a lovely reading from Rocky IV. 311 00:11:56,857 --> 00:11:59,001 All right, Mr. Cooper. 312 00:11:59,004 --> 00:12:00,665 The stage is yours. 313 00:12:00,668 --> 00:12:02,388 Thank you. 314 00:12:02,390 --> 00:12:06,593 I'd like to begin with a monologue from King Lear. 315 00:12:09,131 --> 00:12:10,530 What? 316 00:12:10,532 --> 00:12:13,566 I believe you're supposed to say “break a leg.” 317 00:12:13,568 --> 00:12:14,968 Sorry. 318 00:12:14,970 --> 00:12:16,707 Break a leg. 319 00:12:19,407 --> 00:12:23,576 Poor naked wretches, whereso'er you are, 320 00:12:23,578 --> 00:12:27,814 that bide the pelting of this pitiless storm. 321 00:12:27,816 --> 00:12:31,634 How shall your houseless heads and unfed sides, 322 00:12:31,637 --> 00:12:34,965 your looped and windowed raggedness defend you 323 00:12:34,968 --> 00:12:37,590 from seasons such as these? 324 00:12:37,592 --> 00:12:43,163 Oh, I've ta'en too little care of this. 325 00:12:43,165 --> 00:12:45,765 Take physic, pomp. 326 00:12:45,767 --> 00:12:49,269 Expose thyself to feel what wretches feel, 327 00:12:49,271 --> 00:12:51,683 that thou may shake the superflux to them 328 00:12:51,686 --> 00:12:55,487 and show the heavens more just. 329 00:12:55,490 --> 00:12:58,723 Holy mackerel. 330 00:12:58,726 --> 00:13:04,616 ♪ Don't cry for me, Argentina ♪ 331 00:13:04,619 --> 00:13:09,422 ♪ The truth is I never left you ♪ 332 00:13:09,424 --> 00:13:11,915 ♪ All through my wild days ♪ 333 00:13:11,918 --> 00:13:14,327 ♪ My mad existence ♪ 334 00:13:14,329 --> 00:13:16,885 ♪ I kept my promise ♪ 335 00:13:16,888 --> 00:13:18,058 ♪ Don't keep ♪ 336 00:13:18,061 --> 00:13:21,634 ♪ Your distance... ♪ 337 00:13:21,636 --> 00:13:23,570 [”I'VE GOT RHYTHM” PLAYING ON PIANO] 338 00:13:23,572 --> 00:13:26,665 ♪ I've got daisies ♪ 339 00:13:26,668 --> 00:13:29,118 ♪ In green pastures ♪ 340 00:13:29,121 --> 00:13:31,251 ♪ I've got my girl ♪ 341 00:13:31,254 --> 00:13:34,152 ♪ Who could ask for anything more ♪ 342 00:13:34,155 --> 00:13:36,774 ♪ Old man trouble ♪ 343 00:13:36,777 --> 00:13:39,360 ♪ I don't mind him ♪ 344 00:13:39,363 --> 00:13:41,266 ♪ You won't find him ♪ 345 00:13:41,269 --> 00:13:44,102 ♪ Hanging 'round my door ♪ 346 00:13:44,105 --> 00:13:46,313 ♪ I've got starlight ♪ 347 00:13:46,316 --> 00:13:49,127 ♪ I've got sweet dreams ♪ 348 00:13:49,130 --> 00:13:51,430 ♪ I've got my star ♪ 349 00:13:51,433 --> 00:13:53,433 ♪ Who could ask for anything more? ♪ 350 00:13:53,435 --> 00:13:55,268 ♪ Who could ask for ♪ 351 00:13:55,270 --> 00:13:59,087 ♪ Anything more? ♪ 352 00:13:59,090 --> 00:14:00,985 Ah. [WHOOPS] 353 00:14:03,545 --> 00:14:05,545 That looked dangerous. 354 00:14:05,547 --> 00:14:08,147 No, that looks dangerous. 355 00:14:08,149 --> 00:14:09,682 We're back. 356 00:14:09,684 --> 00:14:11,933 Hey. How'd the audition go? 357 00:14:11,936 --> 00:14:13,377 Great. I got the lead. 358 00:14:13,380 --> 00:14:14,813 You're kidding. 359 00:14:14,816 --> 00:14:16,089 What's the play? 360 00:14:16,091 --> 00:14:17,390 Annie. 361 00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:20,808 I need to go learn my lines. 362 00:14:24,098 --> 00:14:26,808 Now, I was a little unsure at first, 363 00:14:26,811 --> 00:14:29,516 but Sandy Duncan does play Peter Pan, 364 00:14:29,519 --> 00:14:30,703 so when you think about it... 365 00:14:30,705 --> 00:14:31,798 Connie, you're not helping. 366 00:14:31,801 --> 00:14:33,239 Okay. 367 00:14:34,448 --> 00:14:35,832 [SIGHS] 368 00:14:41,302 --> 00:14:42,526 Hey. 369 00:14:42,528 --> 00:14:44,929 Hello. 370 00:14:44,931 --> 00:14:47,665 [SIGHS] I want to talk to you about this play. 371 00:14:47,667 --> 00:14:49,400 I'm excited about it, too. 372 00:14:49,402 --> 00:14:52,470 You know, if you play the part of a girl, 373 00:14:52,473 --> 00:14:54,091 people might make fun of you. 374 00:14:54,094 --> 00:14:56,150 Mr. Lundy's trying to push the boundaries 375 00:14:56,153 --> 00:14:57,908 of drama in East Texas. 376 00:14:57,910 --> 00:15:01,178 One way to do that is cross-gender casting. 377 00:15:01,180 --> 00:15:02,680 Let me rephrase that: 378 00:15:02,682 --> 00:15:05,989 if you play the part of a girl, people will make fun of you. 379 00:15:05,992 --> 00:15:08,653 In Shakespeare's time, the men played all the female parts. 380 00:15:08,656 --> 00:15:10,089 No one made fun of it. 381 00:15:10,092 --> 00:15:11,788 If Shakespeare went to public high school, 382 00:15:11,791 --> 00:15:13,005 it'd be a different story. 383 00:15:13,008 --> 00:15:14,878 You know, Sandy Duncan plays the part of Peter Pan... 384 00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:17,394 Yeah, yeah, I heard. 385 00:15:17,397 --> 00:15:20,031 [EXHALES] 386 00:15:21,997 --> 00:15:24,135 I'm trying to protect you, son. 387 00:15:24,137 --> 00:15:26,137 I appreciate that. 388 00:15:26,139 --> 00:15:27,338 Good. 389 00:15:27,340 --> 00:15:29,673 You're a football coach. 390 00:15:29,675 --> 00:15:31,142 Isn't it your responsibility 391 00:15:31,144 --> 00:15:33,244 to put in the best player for the job? 392 00:15:33,246 --> 00:15:35,646 I guess. 393 00:15:35,648 --> 00:15:38,349 Well, I want to do this, 394 00:15:38,351 --> 00:15:41,598 and Mr. Lundy said I was the best. 395 00:15:44,317 --> 00:15:46,684 Okay. 396 00:15:46,687 --> 00:15:49,192 Can you at least wear pants instead of a dress? 397 00:15:49,195 --> 00:15:51,575 I'll give you a definite maybe. 398 00:15:57,911 --> 00:16:00,137 Okay, who's excited? 399 00:16:00,140 --> 00:16:03,012 I don't want to see Sheldon's stupid play, it's humiliating. 400 00:16:03,015 --> 00:16:05,005 That's why I want to see it. 401 00:16:05,008 --> 00:16:06,496 We're going to support your brother. 402 00:16:06,499 --> 00:16:08,467 Not another word about it. 403 00:16:10,449 --> 00:16:12,116 Can we at least sit in the back? 404 00:16:12,118 --> 00:16:13,517 Not a word. 405 00:16:15,177 --> 00:16:17,333 Well, I'm excited. 406 00:16:22,344 --> 00:16:25,642 Okay, everybody, ten minutes to curtain. 407 00:16:25,645 --> 00:16:28,114 No smiling, girls, it's a hard knock life. 408 00:16:28,117 --> 00:16:30,012 How you doing, Mr. Cooper? 409 00:16:30,015 --> 00:16:31,948 You in touch with your inner Annie? 410 00:16:31,951 --> 00:16:33,484 I believe so. 411 00:16:33,487 --> 00:16:35,525 Good. It's a packed house. 412 00:16:35,528 --> 00:16:36,603 [LAUGHS] 413 00:16:36,606 --> 00:16:37,708 Wha... oh, what the heck? 414 00:16:37,710 --> 00:16:39,977 Katie? Katie. You're an orphan, 415 00:16:39,979 --> 00:16:41,545 sweetheart, not a coal miner. 416 00:16:41,547 --> 00:16:43,778 Let's tone that down, hmm? 417 00:16:45,084 --> 00:16:46,550 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 418 00:16:48,087 --> 00:16:50,552 [HEART BEATING RAPIDLY] 419 00:16:55,962 --> 00:16:57,728 ♪ ♪ 420 00:16:57,730 --> 00:16:59,763 Oh, dear. 421 00:16:59,765 --> 00:17:01,398 I can't do this. 422 00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:02,783 What are you talking about? 423 00:17:02,793 --> 00:17:04,082 The play, I can't do it. 424 00:17:04,085 --> 00:17:05,718 There are too many people out there. 425 00:17:05,721 --> 00:17:07,463 Oh, that is just stage fright. 426 00:17:07,466 --> 00:17:09,114 That's completely normal. 427 00:17:09,117 --> 00:17:11,255 No, this is a full-blown panic attack. 428 00:17:11,258 --> 00:17:12,692 All right, listen to me. 429 00:17:12,695 --> 00:17:14,255 You're feeling scared. 430 00:17:14,258 --> 00:17:17,526 I get that, but what you have to understand 431 00:17:17,529 --> 00:17:20,063 is you're not going out on that stage alone. 432 00:17:20,066 --> 00:17:22,218 Everybody, gather around, hmm? 433 00:17:22,221 --> 00:17:24,054 Uh, Sheldon, 434 00:17:24,056 --> 00:17:26,285 have you ever been to the circus? 435 00:17:26,293 --> 00:17:27,965 - Yes. - Okay, good. 436 00:17:27,968 --> 00:17:29,859 I had a panic attack there, too. 437 00:17:29,862 --> 00:17:32,296 My point is, 438 00:17:32,298 --> 00:17:36,367 the trapeze artist always performs with a net 439 00:17:36,369 --> 00:17:38,769 to catch him, to protect him. 440 00:17:38,771 --> 00:17:43,440 And you are protected by everyone standing here. 441 00:17:43,442 --> 00:17:46,856 Nothing can happen to you out on that stage, 442 00:17:46,859 --> 00:17:49,012 because we're a team. 443 00:17:49,015 --> 00:17:52,517 We are your net. 444 00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:54,653 I don't know. 445 00:17:54,656 --> 00:17:55,855 [SIGHS] 446 00:17:55,858 --> 00:17:57,925 Sheldon, come here. 447 00:17:58,991 --> 00:18:00,291 You... 448 00:18:00,293 --> 00:18:02,493 are a star, 449 00:18:02,495 --> 00:18:05,162 and that audience 450 00:18:05,165 --> 00:18:09,059 deserves to see you shine. 451 00:18:12,705 --> 00:18:15,005 [AUDIENCE APPLAUDS] 452 00:18:15,007 --> 00:18:17,829 ADULT SHELDON: Mr. Lundy gave a compelling speech. 453 00:18:17,832 --> 00:18:21,278 The audience did deserve to see what they came for, 454 00:18:21,280 --> 00:18:23,981 an eager boy bravely taking on 455 00:18:23,983 --> 00:18:26,850 the role of Little Orphan Annie. 456 00:18:26,852 --> 00:18:28,719 You're looking for a knuckle sandwich. 457 00:18:28,721 --> 00:18:32,890 And in that respect, they were not disappointed. 458 00:18:32,892 --> 00:18:35,025 Pipe down, all of you. 459 00:18:35,027 --> 00:18:36,694 Go back to sleep. 460 00:18:36,696 --> 00:18:39,071 It's all right, Molly. 461 00:18:39,074 --> 00:18:40,657 Annie's here. 462 00:18:40,660 --> 00:18:42,166 [LAUGHTER] 463 00:18:42,168 --> 00:18:43,701 Oh, thank God. 464 00:18:43,703 --> 00:18:48,574 I'd tell you how an East Texas audience in 1989 responded 465 00:18:48,577 --> 00:18:50,841 to a grown man playing Annie, 466 00:18:50,843 --> 00:18:54,178 but I think you know. 467 00:18:54,180 --> 00:18:56,248 Mm-hmm. 468 00:18:56,251 --> 00:18:58,318 [WHISPERS]: What's my line? 469 00:18:59,644 --> 00:19:02,511 ♪ The sun come out tomorrow ♪ 470 00:19:02,514 --> 00:19:06,204 ♪ Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow ♪ 471 00:19:06,207 --> 00:19:08,379 ♪ There'll be sun ♪ 472 00:19:08,382 --> 00:19:11,485 ♪ When I'm stuck with a day that's gray ♪ 473 00:19:11,488 --> 00:19:13,446 ♪ And lonely ♪ 474 00:19:13,449 --> 00:19:16,668 ♪ I just stick out my chin and grin ♪ 475 00:19:16,671 --> 00:19:19,436 ♪ And say ♪ 476 00:19:19,439 --> 00:19:21,485 ♪ Oh... ♪ 477 00:19:21,488 --> 00:19:23,508 I think I see his underpants. 478 00:19:23,510 --> 00:19:24,775 I told you. 479 00:19:24,777 --> 00:19:28,012 Theatre folk just love to show off their business. 480 00:19:28,014 --> 00:19:30,748 ♪ Always a day away ♪ 481 00:19:30,750 --> 00:19:34,318 ♪ Tomorrow, tomorrow ♪ 482 00:19:34,320 --> 00:19:36,754 ♪ I love you, tomorrow ♪ 483 00:19:36,756 --> 00:19:40,558 ♪ You're always a day ♪ 484 00:19:40,560 --> 00:19:45,997 ♪ Away. ♪ 485 00:19:50,488 --> 00:19:55,528 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com -- 33341

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