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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:34,168 --> 00:00:37,471 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? DAD SAID I WAS FAMILY VIDEOGRAPHER. 2 00:00:37,471 --> 00:00:40,374 I'M DOCUMENTING OUR JOURNEY. 3 00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:44,112 WE'RE NOT GOING ON A JOURNEY, SARA. WE'RE GOING ON A VERY LONG DRIVE. 4 00:00:44,112 --> 00:00:46,214 NUH-UH. DAD SAID WE'RE TAKING A JOURNEY. 5 00:00:46,214 --> 00:00:49,317 DOES THE RV HAVE A POWER PORT FOR MY LAPTOP ? 6 00:00:49,317 --> 00:00:52,653 WE'RE ON A BUDGET, AND THE ECONOMY MODEL RV MIGHT NOT EVEN HAVE A TOILET, 7 00:00:52,653 --> 00:00:55,489 BUT I'M SURE IT HAS A CIGARETTE LIGHTER. 8 00:00:55,489 --> 00:00:58,526 POWER PORT, MOM. WE DON'T SAY CIGARETTE LIGHTER ANYMORE. 9 00:00:58,526 --> 00:01:01,195 WE ALSO DON'T WALK AROUND WITH A MILK MOUSTACHE... 10 00:01:01,195 --> 00:01:04,165 NO MATTER HOW MUCH IT ACCENTUATES OUR BOOGER-NOSE. 11 00:01:04,165 --> 00:01:07,868 SORRY. I'M TOO EXCITED ABOUT OUR TRIP. 12 00:01:07,868 --> 00:01:11,805 MOM, DAD HAS BEEN QUOTED AS SAYING THIS IS GONNA BE THE FUNNEST VACATION EVER. 13 00:01:11,805 --> 00:01:14,342 CAN WE GET YOUR REACTION ? 14 00:01:14,342 --> 00:01:17,245 DRIVING ACROSS COUNTRY TO A FAMILY REUNION, COOKING, CLEANING, 15 00:01:17,245 --> 00:01:20,248 ORGANIZING AND BUDGETING IS NOT FUN AND NOT A VACATION. 16 00:01:20,248 --> 00:01:22,683 YET, IT'S WHAT I DO WITH MY FREE TIME. 17 00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:30,791 OH, NO ! EW ! 18 00:01:30,791 --> 00:01:32,660 NO, PLEASE. 19 00:01:35,329 --> 00:01:39,167 THANK YOU. 20 00:01:39,167 --> 00:01:42,770 - NO ! 21 00:01:43,771 --> 00:01:46,207 NOT MY GNOMES ! 22 00:01:51,412 --> 00:01:53,414 HE GOT THE BIGGEST ONE THEY HAD. 23 00:01:54,682 --> 00:01:56,917 NOW, THIS... IS CAMPING ! 24 00:01:56,917 --> 00:01:59,587 DAD, IT IS SO COOL ! 25 00:01:59,587 --> 00:02:02,190 YOU LIKE IT ? GO CHECK IT OUT. 26 00:02:02,190 --> 00:02:05,626 YOU THINK THAT'S COOL ? WAIT TILL YOUR FRIENDS DRIVE BY POINTING AND LAUGHING AT YOU. 27 00:02:05,626 --> 00:02:08,396 THEN WE'LL SEE HOW COOL YOU THINK IT IS. BRENNAN. 28 00:02:08,396 --> 00:02:10,931 MAYBE ONE OF THEM HAD JUST TOLD A JOKE. DID YOU CONSIDER THAT ? 29 00:02:10,931 --> 00:02:13,434 YEAH. THE JOKE WAS, "LOOK, EVERYBODY, 30 00:02:13,434 --> 00:02:16,237 BRENNAN NEWTON'S GOING ON A VACATION WITH HIS FAMILY IN A BUS." 31 00:02:16,237 --> 00:02:18,406 GOD, HOW LAME IS THAT ? 32 00:02:18,406 --> 00:02:21,342 EVEN JESSICA DONNELLY SAW ME. 33 00:02:21,342 --> 00:02:24,945 HEY, BRENN, YOUR FRIENDS ARE ALL PROBABLY GONNA STAY IN HOTELS THIS SUMMER. 34 00:02:24,945 --> 00:02:28,382 WE'RE GONNA SLEEP BESIDE PRISTINE LAKES IN THE GREAT OUTDOORS. 35 00:02:28,382 --> 00:02:32,253 AND THE BEAUTY OF IT IS, THIS RIG HAS EVERYTHING ! 36 00:02:32,253 --> 00:02:34,522 SO YOU'LL NEVER EVEN KNOW YOU LEFT HOME. THAT'S JUST IT, DAD. 37 00:02:34,522 --> 00:02:36,857 IT'S HOME, BUT SMALLER FOR TWO WEEKS. 38 00:02:39,427 --> 00:02:41,762 I DON'T EVEN WANNA GO ON THIS STUPID TRIP ANYWAY. 39 00:02:41,762 --> 00:02:44,198 - I DIDN'T BUDGET FOR THIS, RICHARD. - I KNOW, I KNOW. 40 00:02:44,198 --> 00:02:46,434 JUST LOOK. COME ON. JUST LOOK. 41 00:02:46,434 --> 00:02:49,970 I NEED A NEW TAPE. OKAY. JUST LOOK. 42 00:02:49,970 --> 00:02:52,473 WE CAN'T AFFORD THIS, RICHARD. 43 00:02:54,442 --> 00:02:58,246 NO WAY ! IS THAT A DVD PLAYER ? 44 00:02:58,246 --> 00:03:01,415 YEP, AND A FRIDGE/FREEZER, TUB/SHOWER, 45 00:03:01,415 --> 00:03:04,618 BLENDER/FOOD PROCESSOR, POWER PORTS FOR SARA'S COMPUTER, 46 00:03:04,618 --> 00:03:07,255 AND CHECK THIS OUT. 47 00:03:08,656 --> 00:03:14,228 INSTANT HYDRAULIC EMERGENCY BRAKE. 48 00:03:14,228 --> 00:03:17,865 YOU TOUCH THAT BABY, AND THIS COACH COMES TO A TOTAL STANDSTILL IN HALF A SECOND. 49 00:03:17,865 --> 00:03:20,734 AND WHAT, WE GO SAILING THROUGH THE FRONT WINDOW ? 50 00:03:20,734 --> 00:03:24,472 SPRING ACTION SHOULDER STRAP SEAT BELTS, HONEY. 51 00:03:24,472 --> 00:03:26,907 IT DOESN'T GET ANY SAFER. 52 00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:33,614 OH. 53 00:03:33,614 --> 00:03:37,651 YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT SCRUBBING IT TOP TO BOTTOM. 54 00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:40,254 IT'S BRAND NEW. WE'RE THE FIRST RENTERS. 55 00:03:45,459 --> 00:03:48,329 VERY, VERY FUNNY. HOW MUCH ? 56 00:03:48,329 --> 00:03:52,600 OH, UH, I DON'T KNOW. I'D HAVE TO LOOK AT THE RENTAL AGREEMENT, 57 00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:55,603 BUT JUST THINK HOW MUCH WE'LL BE SAVING... 58 00:03:55,603 --> 00:03:59,340 IN RESTAURANTS, HOTELS, ROOM SERVICE, ROOM SERVICE TIPS. 59 00:03:59,340 --> 00:04:02,009 EXACTLY HOW MUCH IS THIS DREAM HOUSE ON WHEELS COSTING US ? 60 00:04:04,512 --> 00:04:07,715 OH, RICHARD, THAT'S TWICE WHAT WE PLANNED TO SPEND. 61 00:04:07,715 --> 00:04:10,918 A LITTLE MORE, ACTUALLY, WITH INSURANCE. 62 00:04:10,918 --> 00:04:13,621 OH, RIGHT. BETH, I'M SORRY. 63 00:04:13,621 --> 00:04:15,989 I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF. 64 00:04:15,989 --> 00:04:19,993 I WANNA RELIVE ONE OF THE GREAT EXPERIENCES OF MY CHILDHOOD WITH MY FAMILY. 65 00:04:19,993 --> 00:04:23,331 UH, WELL, SPEAKING OF FAMILY, YOUR BROTHER GEORGE CALLED FROM EUROPE. 66 00:04:23,331 --> 00:04:27,501 HUH ! LET ME GUESS. HE SAID THEY'RE NOT GONNA MAKE IT TO THE REUNION. 67 00:04:27,501 --> 00:04:29,937 NO, THEY'RE GONNA MAKE IT, BUT THEY WANTED US TO BRING SOMETHING THERE FOR THEM. 68 00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:32,373 IT'S GONNA BE DELIVERED THIS MORNING. WHAT ? 69 00:04:32,373 --> 00:04:35,876 I COULDN'T HEAR WHAT IT WAS. IT WAS A CELL PHONE. YOU KNOW, BAD CONNECTION. 70 00:04:35,876 --> 00:04:40,414 HUH. HEY, YOU SEE THERE ? THE EXTRA STORAGE CAPACITY IS ALREADY SAVING US HEADACHES. 71 00:04:40,414 --> 00:04:42,015 YOU'RE PUSHING IT, RICHARD. 72 00:04:43,784 --> 00:04:46,654 HI. YEAH, UH, WE WOULD LIKE TO PURCHASE... 73 00:04:46,654 --> 00:04:50,023 A DVD COPY OF THE SHAKIEST GUN IN THE WEST, PLEASE. 74 00:04:50,023 --> 00:04:52,092 ARE YOU FAMILIAR WITH THAT TITLE ? 75 00:04:52,092 --> 00:04:56,364 1967, WRITTEN BY JAMES FRITZELL AND EVERETT GREENBAUM. 76 00:04:56,364 --> 00:04:58,866 COMEDY/WESTERN. DIRECTED BY ALAN RAFKIN. 77 00:04:58,866 --> 00:05:01,034 STARRING PAT MORITA AS WONG, 78 00:05:01,034 --> 00:05:04,505 JACKIE COOGAN AS BASCH, BARBARA RHODES AS PENELOPE CUSHINGS... 79 00:05:04,505 --> 00:05:06,940 AND, OF COURSE, DON KNOTTS AS JESSE W. HEYWOOD. 80 00:05:06,940 --> 00:05:09,343 THAT SHAKIEST GUN IN THE WEST ? 81 00:05:09,343 --> 00:05:11,479 YES, THAT'S THE ONE. ONE COPY, PLEASE. 82 00:05:11,479 --> 00:05:14,648 - WE'RE SOLD OUT. 83 00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:17,451 EXCUSE ME. THAT'S NASTY. 84 00:05:17,451 --> 00:05:22,356 THIS IS WAY OUT OF CONTROL. IT'S TOO COMPLICATED. 85 00:05:22,356 --> 00:05:27,728 I SAID LET'S STEAL THE OPERATING SYSTEM AND DELIVER IT IN PERSON, BUT YOU SAID NO. 86 00:05:27,728 --> 00:05:31,699 LET'S PUT IT ON A DVD THAT NOBODY EVER BUYS, 87 00:05:31,699 --> 00:05:34,935 STICK IT IN A VIDEO STORE AND DELIVER IT THAT WAY. 88 00:05:34,935 --> 00:05:37,705 AND ? AND... 89 00:05:37,705 --> 00:05:42,676 SOMEBODY BOUGHT THE DVD THAT NOBODY WAS SUPPOSED TO BUY. 90 00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:45,012 OH, GOD, WE'RE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE. 91 00:05:45,012 --> 00:05:48,849 OKAY. WE ALREADY SPENT THE MONEY THAT WE GOT FROM MR. YOU KNOW WHO. 92 00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:53,153 OH, MY GOD. DO YOU KNOW WHAT MR. YOU KNOW WHO... 93 00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:57,691 IS GOING TO DO TO US WHEN HE FINDS OUT THAT SOMEBODY ELSE HAS THE YOU KNOW WHAT ? 94 00:05:57,691 --> 00:06:00,160 NO, WHAT ? I'M KIDDING. 95 00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:03,731 I'M A JOKER. WE ARE DEAD IF WE DON'T GET THAT DVD BACK ! 96 00:06:03,731 --> 00:06:06,400 OKAY, WILLIAM, CALM YOURSELF. 97 00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:09,937 OBSERVE THE MASTER. 98 00:06:12,773 --> 00:06:14,942 HELLO, THERE, QUENTIN. I'M WONDERING, 99 00:06:14,942 --> 00:06:18,045 HOW LONG TO ORDER A COPY OF THE SHAKIEST GUN IN THE WEST ? 100 00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:20,047 THAT WOULD BE ABOUT SIX TO EIGHT WEEKS. 101 00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:22,182 OH, THAT'S BAD. 102 00:06:22,182 --> 00:06:24,618 MAYBE WE CAN ORDER A COPY FROM THE GUY WHO ORDERED IT FROM YOU. 103 00:06:24,618 --> 00:06:28,188 YES, MAY WE HAVE HIS NAME, ADDRESS AND TELEPHONE NUMBER ? 104 00:06:28,188 --> 00:06:31,859 DUDE, WHAT DO I GOT, LIKE FEDERAL FELONY WRITTEN ACROSS MY FOREHEAD OR SOMETHING ? 105 00:06:31,859 --> 00:06:33,994 COULD YOU, PERHAPS, SEE IF YOU HAVE ANOTHER COPY ? 106 00:06:33,994 --> 00:06:35,863 WE DON'T. 107 00:06:35,863 --> 00:06:37,698 COULD YOU CHECK, PLEASE ? C-C-C-- 108 00:06:39,032 --> 00:06:42,703 OKAY, MAN. WHATEVER. JUST COOL YOUR JETS. 109 00:06:44,672 --> 00:06:48,809 WHAT ? TOMMY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING ? THAT IS COMPLETELY ILLEGAL. 110 00:06:48,809 --> 00:06:52,145 I'M AN IDIOT. 111 00:06:52,145 --> 00:06:55,115 YES, YES YOU ARE, BUT FORTUNATELY FOR BOTH OF US, I AM A GENIUS. 112 00:06:55,115 --> 00:06:57,551 BEGIN THE COUNTDOWN. TEN, NINE-- 113 00:06:57,551 --> 00:07:01,221 RICHARD NEWTON, 1715 HAUSER STREET. BLAST OFF, BABY. 114 00:07:01,221 --> 00:07:04,024 YOU HACKED THEIR SYSTEM IN TWO SECONDS. 115 00:07:04,024 --> 00:07:07,495 THAT IS A NEW RECORD. I DON'T BELIEVE IT. 116 00:07:07,495 --> 00:07:10,564 THAT IS WHY YOU FAIL. STUPID YOU ARE. 117 00:07:14,902 --> 00:07:17,605 I HOPE YOU HAVE A NICE SUMMER. 118 00:07:17,605 --> 00:07:20,874 I DIDN'T KNOW JESSICA DONNELLY WAS YOUR GIRLFRIEND. 119 00:07:20,874 --> 00:07:23,577 WELL, SHE WAS GONNA BE BEFORE THIS WHOLE STUPID TRIP. 120 00:07:23,577 --> 00:07:26,847 BUT NOW SHE WON'T EVER BE. HEY, ARE YOU FILMING ME ? 121 00:07:26,847 --> 00:07:29,917 - DAD SAID I GOTTA DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. - GIVE ME THAT ! 122 00:07:29,917 --> 00:07:31,919 - NO ! - GIVE ME THE CAMERA, SARA ! 123 00:07:31,919 --> 00:07:35,956 NO ! I GOT TO DOCUMENT EVERYTHING ! 124 00:07:35,956 --> 00:07:39,493 COME ON ! GIVE IT ! BRENNAN, STOP TERRORIZING YOUR SISTER. 125 00:07:39,493 --> 00:07:43,063 - TELL HER TO GIVE ME THE TAPE. - WHEN SHE GETS BIG, SHE'S GONNA KICK HIS BUTT. 126 00:07:43,063 --> 00:07:47,067 GIVE ME THE CAMERA, SARA ! HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, YOU GUYS. 127 00:07:47,067 --> 00:07:50,638 MOM, SHE WAS-- YOU GUYS. NO, SARA'S JUST DOING HER JOB, OKAY ? 128 00:07:50,638 --> 00:07:55,275 AND NOBODY'S GONNA GO RUNNING INTO THE RV, MAKING A MESS OF EVERYTHING I JUST LOADED. 129 00:07:55,275 --> 00:07:58,812 NOW, ORGANIZATION IS THE KEY TO HAPPINESS ON THIS TRIP, OKAY ? 130 00:07:58,812 --> 00:08:01,882 BUT, MOM, SHE WAS-- BRENNAN, THIS TRIP IS REALLY IMPORTANT TO YOUR FATHER, 131 00:08:01,882 --> 00:08:04,017 SO COULD YOU JUST TRY AND ACT EXCITED ? 132 00:08:04,017 --> 00:08:06,920 FINE. 133 00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:11,291 SO, BRENNAN, DAD SAID THIS IS GONNA BE THE FUNNEST VACATION EVER. 134 00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:13,193 CAN WE GET YOUR REACTION ? 135 00:08:16,063 --> 00:08:19,733 I'M GONNA TELL YOU DID THAT. - BOAT'S HOOKED UP. 136 00:08:19,733 --> 00:08:21,769 - HOUSE IS LOCKED UP. - GIVE ME THAT ! 137 00:08:21,769 --> 00:08:23,904 - OH, OH, OH, OH. - LET'S HIT THE ROAD, NEWTONS. 138 00:08:23,904 --> 00:08:27,641 - YOU TWO ! - WAIT. WAIT. I ALMOST FORGOT. 139 00:08:30,177 --> 00:08:32,179 WHAT'S THAT ? 140 00:08:32,179 --> 00:08:36,784 ON MY MOTOR HOME VACATION, MY DAD DID THIS FOR US. 141 00:08:36,784 --> 00:08:39,820 IT MADE US FEEL LIKE A REAL TEAM, 142 00:08:39,820 --> 00:08:41,622 AND, WELL, I WANT YOU TO FEEL THE SAME WAY. 143 00:08:41,622 --> 00:08:43,691 GREAT. THAT'S GREAT. 144 00:08:44,925 --> 00:08:49,196 OKAY. OKAY ! EVERYBODY TURN AROUND. 145 00:08:49,196 --> 00:08:51,331 TURN AROUND. TURN AROUND. 146 00:08:51,331 --> 00:08:53,701 WHAT DO YOU THINK ? 147 00:08:53,701 --> 00:08:56,570 COOL, HUH ? THIS IS SO LAME. 148 00:09:00,841 --> 00:09:03,310 OKAY. OH, WAIT. THERE'S MORE. 149 00:09:07,214 --> 00:09:09,617 WHAT DO YOU GOT, DAD ? 150 00:09:09,617 --> 00:09:12,586 ONE OF THE BEST THINGS ABOUT MY MOTOR HOME VACATION... 151 00:09:12,586 --> 00:09:14,788 WAS WHEN WE STOPPED AT A DRIVE-IN. 152 00:09:14,788 --> 00:09:17,825 WE SAT ON THE ROOF OF THE RV IN OUR PAJAMAS, 153 00:09:17,825 --> 00:09:21,361 ATE POPCORN AND WATCHED THE SHAKIEST GUN IN THE WEST. 154 00:09:24,297 --> 00:09:26,600 WHO'S DON KNOTTS ? 155 00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:30,003 DON KNOTTS ? 156 00:09:44,351 --> 00:09:46,987 THANKS, MR. NEWTON. WHAT IS IT ? 157 00:09:46,987 --> 00:09:49,356 YOU DON'T KNOW. 158 00:09:50,858 --> 00:09:52,893 - NO. - GOOD LUCK ! 159 00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:09,943 OOH, SARA, IT'S GONNA BITE YOU. 160 00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:11,812 DAD. 161 00:10:13,914 --> 00:10:16,116 WHAT DID I AGREE TO BRING WITH US ? 162 00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:18,986 UH, BRENNAN, OPEN IT. 163 00:10:18,986 --> 00:10:22,756 WHY ME ? BECAUSE YOU'RE A TRAINED BOY SCOUT. 164 00:10:22,756 --> 00:10:27,027 YOU'RE PREPARED, AND YOU'RE CLOSER. 165 00:10:27,027 --> 00:10:30,297 NO, I'M NOT. JUST DO IT. OPEN IT. 166 00:10:44,044 --> 00:10:45,846 WHAT ? 167 00:10:50,951 --> 00:10:52,953 WHAT, ARE YOU CHICKEN ? 168 00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:03,697 HE'S HUGE ! DON'T SLOBBER ON ME ! DON'T ! 169 00:11:05,866 --> 00:11:10,137 GET HIM AWAY ! GET HIM AWAY ! GET HIM, BRENNAN ! GET HIM ! 170 00:11:10,137 --> 00:11:14,474 - HONEY ! HONEY ! - DID YOU SEE THE SIZE OF THAT DOG ? 171 00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:20,347 OH ! OH ! 172 00:11:29,890 --> 00:11:32,092 I'M OKAY. I'M ALL RIGHT. 173 00:11:32,092 --> 00:11:35,328 - DADDY ! - RICHARD ! 174 00:11:35,328 --> 00:11:41,001 - IT'S NOT MY FAULT. 175 00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:44,872 BEETHOVEN, COME HERE, BOY. 176 00:11:57,517 --> 00:12:01,121 OH, MY GOD ! 177 00:12:01,121 --> 00:12:02,990 OH ! 178 00:12:10,998 --> 00:12:15,869 DO YOU SEE ANYTHING ? NO ! THEY MUST HAVE BEEN TIPPED OFF. 179 00:12:15,869 --> 00:12:18,872 TIPPED OFF ! ARE YOU SURE ? 180 00:12:18,872 --> 00:12:21,842 HMM, ON THIS PARTICULAR DAY, THEY GO TO THAT PARTICULAR VIDEO STORE... 181 00:12:21,842 --> 00:12:27,114 AND GET THAT PARTICULAR COPY OF THAT PARTICULAR MOVIE THAT NO ONE ELSE HAS EVER RENTED. 182 00:12:27,114 --> 00:12:29,950 LOOK, SWITCH TO DECAF, OKAY, BABE ? OPEN YOUR EYES. 183 00:12:29,950 --> 00:12:34,521 THESE PEOPLE ARE PROFESSIONALS. PROFESSIONALS. 184 00:12:34,521 --> 00:12:39,893 WHEN MY DAD TOOK ME ON MY MOTOR HOME VACATION, WE HAD A DOG WITH US-- SPARTACUS. 185 00:12:39,893 --> 00:12:43,263 IT WAS GREAT ! SPARTACUS WAS A CHIHUAHUA. 186 00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:46,166 THAT SHEDS A TRASH BAG FULL OF HAIR EVERY DAY. 187 00:12:46,166 --> 00:12:50,003 THIS IS ONE PART OF YOUR BOYHOOD TRIP YOU'RE JUST NOT GONNA GET TO RELIVE. NO WAY. 188 00:12:51,571 --> 00:12:54,174 OKAY. VOTE, THEN. 189 00:12:54,174 --> 00:12:56,109 ALL IN FAVOR OF BRINGING BEETHOVEN WITH US, RAISE YOUR HAND. 190 00:12:57,444 --> 00:13:00,247 ALL OPPOSED ? 191 00:13:00,247 --> 00:13:02,816 A TIE. 192 00:13:02,816 --> 00:13:06,086 OKAY, LET'S FLIP FOR IT. NO, WE WON'T. 193 00:13:06,086 --> 00:13:08,822 THE DOG IS NOT GOING. LOOK, 194 00:13:08,822 --> 00:13:11,458 HE'S ALREADY CAUSED US $200 WORTH OF DAMAGE IN THE RV. 195 00:13:11,458 --> 00:13:13,927 NO. AND WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO FEED HIM. 196 00:13:13,927 --> 00:13:15,528 YOU KNOW I'M GONNA END UP CLEANING UP AFTER HIM. 197 00:13:17,064 --> 00:13:19,599 RICHARD, WE'RE GONNA TAKE HIM TO A KENNEL, 198 00:13:19,599 --> 00:13:21,835 AND THEN GEORGE AND ALICE CAN HAVE HIM SHIPPED FROM THERE, OKAY ? 199 00:13:21,835 --> 00:13:24,171 OKAY. ALL RIGHT. I UNDERSTAND. 200 00:13:24,171 --> 00:13:27,074 YOU WOULDN'T PUT RYCE, TED OR EMILY IN A KENNEL. 201 00:13:27,074 --> 00:13:30,010 AND BEETHOVEN'S OUR COUSIN TOO. 202 00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:34,948 HOW ARE WE GONNA GET THAT DVD FROM THEM, HUH ? BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY. 203 00:13:34,948 --> 00:13:36,984 YOU KNOW WHAT ? I THINK SARA IS RIGHT. 204 00:13:36,984 --> 00:13:41,054 THE ONLY DECENT THING TO DO HERE IS LET BEETHOVEN TAKE MY PLACE ON THE TRIP. 205 00:13:41,054 --> 00:13:43,456 I MEAN, I GUESS I'LL HAVE TO STAY HOME. 206 00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:47,060 NICE TRY, BRENNAN. COME ON. WE'RE ALL HITTING THE ROAD. 207 00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:53,166 WHAT ABOUT THAT DOG ? THAT'S GOTTA BE A TRAINED KILLER. 208 00:13:55,068 --> 00:13:58,171 VETERINARIAN ANIMAL TRANQUILIZER. 209 00:13:58,171 --> 00:14:00,974 ANY MORE STUPID QUESTIONS ? TOMMY, THIS LOOKS COMPLICATED. 210 00:14:00,974 --> 00:14:04,311 NOW, YOU ARE SURE THAT YOU KNOW HOW TO USE IT. 211 00:14:04,311 --> 00:14:08,215 EXCUSE ME. WHICH ONE OF US IS THE STUPID ONE ? 212 00:14:08,215 --> 00:14:10,918 ME ? SORRY. YES. THAT WOULD BE YOU. 213 00:14:10,918 --> 00:14:13,020 WHEN WE GET INTO THE HOU-- 214 00:14:14,621 --> 00:14:16,589 THEY SEE US ! MOVE ! 215 00:14:16,589 --> 00:14:18,225 OUT OF MY WAY ! 216 00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:31,071 LET'S GO, NEWTONS. COME ON. 217 00:14:31,071 --> 00:14:33,573 WE'RE LEAVING NOW. COME ON. WE'RE GONNA HIT THE ROAD. LET'S GO. 218 00:14:52,159 --> 00:14:53,994 THEY'RE ON THE ROAD. 219 00:15:00,700 --> 00:15:03,070 WHAT ? 220 00:15:03,070 --> 00:15:05,472 I FELT A GREAT DISTURBANCE IN THE FORCE, 221 00:15:05,472 --> 00:15:08,441 AS IF SEVEN GNOMES CRIED OUT AT ONCE AND WERE SILENCED. 222 00:15:08,441 --> 00:15:10,643 LET'S ROLL. 223 00:15:10,643 --> 00:15:13,981 HURRY UP ! HURRY UP ! THEY'RE IN FRONT. I SEE THEM. 224 00:15:13,981 --> 00:15:16,649 OKAY. STAY BEHIND THEM. THEY'RE RIGHT IN FRONT. 225 00:15:16,649 --> 00:15:19,019 DON'T LOSE THEM, OR WE'RE DEAD. OKAY. LOSING, DEATH, BAD. 226 00:15:24,491 --> 00:15:26,960 HE'LL BE OKAY, HONEY. 227 00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:35,602 DOGS CHECK IN, BUT THEY DON'T CHECK OUT. SHUT UP, BRENNAN. 228 00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:39,539 YOU KNOW, WE COULD DRIVE RIGHT BY YOUR SCHOOL. 229 00:15:39,539 --> 00:15:41,541 SORRY, SORRY, DAD. 230 00:15:47,714 --> 00:15:50,250 - BYE, BEETHOVEN. 231 00:15:59,092 --> 00:16:01,528 LET'S TAKE 'EM. OKAY. 232 00:16:11,704 --> 00:16:13,506 COME HERE, BOY. COME HERE, BOY. 233 00:16:13,506 --> 00:16:16,676 COME HERE. HEY ! COME BACK HERE ! 234 00:16:20,113 --> 00:16:23,283 HOLD THIS ! 235 00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:36,296 OH, WITH THE HURTING ! OH, THAT'S NOT GOOD. 236 00:16:52,279 --> 00:16:54,047 - WHOA ! GOOD DOGGIE ! 237 00:16:55,782 --> 00:16:57,817 GOOD DOGGIE. GOOD DOGGIE, GOOD DOGGIE. 238 00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:10,063 THAT DOG TRASHED THE CAR. JUST DON'T TELL MY MOM. 239 00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:12,565 IT'S COVERED IN CEMENT. 240 00:17:12,565 --> 00:17:15,302 DON'T TELL HER. 241 00:17:15,302 --> 00:17:17,737 SHE'S GONNA KNOW. 242 00:17:31,751 --> 00:17:36,223 - WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT ? - PROBABLY SOMEBODY'S VINTAGE GNOME COLLECTION... 243 00:17:36,223 --> 00:17:39,459 THAT THEY'D PAINSTAKINGLY PUT TOGETHER FOR THE LAST TEN YEARS OF THEIR LIFE. 244 00:17:39,459 --> 00:17:42,462 I SAID I WAS SORRY. 245 00:17:42,462 --> 00:17:46,733 IT WAS PROBABLY A DOG SOMEONE DIDN'T WANT ON THEIR VACATION, AND DAD JUST RAN HIM OVER. 246 00:17:46,733 --> 00:17:48,801 SHUT UP, BRENNAN. 247 00:17:48,801 --> 00:17:51,504 SWEETHEART, BEETHOVEN WILL BE JUST FINE, 248 00:17:51,504 --> 00:17:53,840 EVEN THOUGH YOUR MOMMY MADE HIM STAY IN THAT TERRIBLE PLACE. 249 00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:56,309 OH, THANKS A LOT, RICHARD. 250 00:17:56,309 --> 00:18:00,380 YOU'RE WELCOME, HONEY. OKAY, WHO WANTS TO SING ROAD SONGS ? 251 00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:10,290 NO ? OKAY. 252 00:18:10,290 --> 00:18:13,593 HONEY, WHY DON'T YOU SHOW YOUR MOM THAT GREAT TRIP ROUTE WE PROGRAMMED ? 253 00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:17,197 YOU MEAN THAT ONE FROM WWW.BORING.COM ? 254 00:18:17,197 --> 00:18:19,332 THAT'S ENOUGH, BRENNAN. 255 00:18:19,332 --> 00:18:22,502 IF WE MAKE THE SCHEDULE, WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO HIT BLACK BART'S VILLAGE BY THURSDAY. 256 00:18:22,502 --> 00:18:25,172 YOU'RE GONNA LOVE THAT. 257 00:18:31,478 --> 00:18:35,415 RICHARD, YOU PLANNED THIS ENTIRE TRIP PRACTICALLY TO THE MINUTE. 258 00:18:35,415 --> 00:18:38,451 YOU HAVE A MAP FOR EVERY INCH OF HIGHWAY WE'RE GONNA TRAVEL... 259 00:18:38,451 --> 00:18:40,353 AND A SCHEDULE OF STOPS AND ATTRACTIONS. 260 00:18:40,353 --> 00:18:42,789 OKAY, I'M IMPRESSED. 261 00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:44,424 THIS IS GREAT. YEP. 262 00:18:46,659 --> 00:18:50,930 - BRENN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING ? 263 00:18:50,930 --> 00:18:55,602 I'M GONNA WATCH THAT MOVIE. I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M GONNA WATCH IT, BUT I'M GONNA. 264 00:18:55,602 --> 00:18:57,704 TWO HOURS INTO THE TRIP, AND YOU'RE ALREADY BORED ? 265 00:18:57,704 --> 00:19:00,407 IT'S NOT MY FAULT, DAD. 266 00:19:00,407 --> 00:19:05,278 I CAN GET ANYWHERE I WANT IN THE WORLD WITH JUST A FEW KEYSTROKES, BUT I'M NOT. 267 00:19:05,278 --> 00:19:07,547 I'M WATCHING IT CRAWL BY THROUGH THE WINDOW OF A BUS. 268 00:19:07,547 --> 00:19:10,550 IT WASN'T THAT DIFFERENT WHEN I WAS A KID. 269 00:19:10,550 --> 00:19:15,822 WE DIDN'T HAVE COMPUTERS, BUT WE HAD CLUBHOUSES. WE USED TO BUILD CLUBHOUSES. 270 00:19:15,822 --> 00:19:20,727 - WHAT'S A CLUBHOUSE, DAD ? - NEVER MIND. JUST WATCH THE MOVIE, BRENNAN. 271 00:19:31,204 --> 00:19:35,575 - DAD, THIS DISC IS A REJECT. - WHAT ? 272 00:19:35,575 --> 00:19:39,246 OH, THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ONE OF THE HIGHLIGHTS OF THE TRIP. 273 00:19:44,951 --> 00:19:46,753 HE'LL COME AROUND. JUST GIVE HIM TIME. 274 00:20:55,355 --> 00:20:57,990 RICHARD, WHAT WAS THAT ? MMM, JUST A BRANCH. 275 00:20:57,990 --> 00:21:02,929 OH, YEAH ! 276 00:21:04,431 --> 00:21:06,366 IT'S BEAUTIFUL. 277 00:21:06,366 --> 00:21:10,337 AND THEY SURE KEEP IT CLEAN. 278 00:21:10,337 --> 00:21:13,740 OKAY, NEWTONS. LET'S GET THE BOAT UNHITCHED AND START HAVING SOME FUN ! 279 00:21:13,740 --> 00:21:15,542 OKAY. 280 00:21:20,813 --> 00:21:23,383 MAN ! 281 00:21:23,383 --> 00:21:25,952 I DON'T REMEMBER THIS THING BEING THIS HEAVY. 282 00:21:25,952 --> 00:21:28,855 - BRENNAN, COME HERE AND GIVE ME A HAND. - DOING FINE, DAD. 283 00:21:34,394 --> 00:21:37,564 BEETHOVEN, COME HERE ! 284 00:21:39,899 --> 00:21:44,571 RICHARD ! 285 00:21:44,571 --> 00:21:46,873 RICHARD ! 286 00:21:49,476 --> 00:21:53,513 I'M OKAY. I'M ALL RIGHT. 287 00:21:53,513 --> 00:21:56,416 I'M OKAY. I'M ALL RIGHT. 288 00:22:07,794 --> 00:22:10,997 NO, NO, NO. 289 00:22:10,997 --> 00:22:13,666 NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO ! 290 00:22:16,669 --> 00:22:18,705 NO ! 291 00:22:26,513 --> 00:22:29,616 DAD, BEETHOVEN SAVED YOU. HE'S A HERO. 292 00:22:29,616 --> 00:22:32,419 SARA, I WAS IN THREE FEET OF WATER. 293 00:22:37,156 --> 00:22:39,559 OKAY. I'M CALM NOW AND CLEAN. 294 00:22:40,993 --> 00:22:43,963 YOU DID THIS ON PURPOSE, DIDN'T YOU ? 295 00:22:43,963 --> 00:22:47,767 WHAT ? LET THE TOWING HITCH HIT ME IN THE HMM-HMM ? 296 00:22:47,767 --> 00:22:50,136 THREW MYSELF IN THE LAKE AND SUNK THE BOAT ? 297 00:22:50,136 --> 00:22:54,841 NO, YOU SNUCK BEETHOVEN IN THE BOAT AND YOU TOWED HIM HERE WITH US. 298 00:22:54,841 --> 00:22:57,176 YOU DID, DAD ? THANKS ! 299 00:22:57,176 --> 00:23:01,648 AH, YOU'RE WELCOME SWEETHEART. NO ! 300 00:23:01,648 --> 00:23:04,584 WAIT A MINUTE. I DIDN'T DO THAT. 301 00:23:04,584 --> 00:23:08,488 LOOK, BEETHOVEN OBVIOUSLY GOT AWAY FROM THE KENNEL, 302 00:23:08,488 --> 00:23:11,190 JUMPED IN THE BOAT AND HITCHED A RIDE HERE. 303 00:23:11,190 --> 00:23:13,993 PRETTY SMART DOG. 304 00:23:13,993 --> 00:23:18,865 HE'S AN UNTRAINED, DROOLING HAIR BALL. BEETHOVEN, SIT. 305 00:23:18,865 --> 00:23:22,669 SEE ? NOW WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO WITH HIM ? 306 00:23:22,669 --> 00:23:25,905 SET HIM FREE. HE'LL BE FINE IN THE WILD. 307 00:23:25,905 --> 00:23:29,542 - HE'S AS BIG AS A BEAR. - DAD, NO ! 308 00:23:29,542 --> 00:23:34,714 DAD ! DON'T WORRY. THERE ARE NO BEARS HERE, BRENNAN. 309 00:23:34,714 --> 00:23:37,216 I DON'T SEE ANY OTHER CHOICE. WE HAVE TO TAKE HIM WITH US. 310 00:23:37,216 --> 00:23:40,453 - OH, JOY. - ALL RIGHT. 311 00:23:40,453 --> 00:23:43,456 THE MINUTE BEETHOVEN CAUSES ME EXTRA WORK, HE'S WALKING TO CALIFORNIA. 312 00:23:43,456 --> 00:23:45,558 THAT'S FAIR. THAT'S VERY REASONABLE. 313 00:23:48,761 --> 00:23:52,499 SO WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BOAT ? 314 00:23:52,499 --> 00:23:55,835 UH, IT'S-- THEY TOOK IT AWAY. 315 00:23:55,835 --> 00:23:59,839 HE COMPLETELY TOTALLED IT ? NO... 316 00:23:59,839 --> 00:24:01,708 BUT ENOUGH. 317 00:24:03,676 --> 00:24:05,712 LOOK, IT WASN'T REALLY ALL HIS FAULT. 318 00:24:08,515 --> 00:24:12,519 SARA, LET'S TAKE THE DOG FOR A WALK. HE WAS IN THE BOAT FOR A LONG TIME. 319 00:24:12,519 --> 00:24:14,621 COME ON, BEETHOVEN. BRENNAN, COME WITH US. 320 00:24:14,621 --> 00:24:18,858 HOW MUCH DID YOU GET FOR IT ? WHAT ? THE BOAT ? 321 00:24:18,858 --> 00:24:22,729 NO, THE SHARDS OF FIBERGLASS THAT WE USED TO CALL THE BOAT. 322 00:24:22,729 --> 00:24:26,232 I HAD TO PAY THEM TO TAKE IT AWAY. 323 00:24:26,232 --> 00:24:30,136 OH. MM-HMM. OH. OKAY. THAT'S GREAT. 324 00:24:30,136 --> 00:24:32,739 NO, I'M GONNA WALK HIM. WHAT ARE YOU DOING ? 325 00:24:32,739 --> 00:24:35,875 I'M ADDING UP EVERYTHING THAT BEETHOVEN'S COST US... 326 00:24:35,875 --> 00:24:39,111 SO I KNOW HOW MUCH TO CHARGE GEORGE AND ALICE WHEN WE GET TO THE FAMILY REUNION. 327 00:24:57,697 --> 00:24:59,966 BEETHOVEN ! 328 00:24:59,966 --> 00:25:02,935 SARA, I WOULDN'T LET HIM CHASE THAT THING. 329 00:25:02,935 --> 00:25:05,271 - BEETHOVEN, STOP ! 330 00:25:05,271 --> 00:25:07,807 BRENNAN ! 331 00:25:10,176 --> 00:25:13,312 THAT'S GONNA STINK ! 332 00:25:13,312 --> 00:25:15,982 OOH ! 333 00:25:15,982 --> 00:25:18,618 SIR, WE'VE HAD SOME COMPLAINTS ABOUT YOUR DOG. 334 00:25:18,618 --> 00:25:22,922 I'M SORRY. HE'S A HOUSE DOG. 335 00:25:22,922 --> 00:25:25,825 - HE DOESN'T GET OUT MUCH. 336 00:25:25,825 --> 00:25:30,329 REALLY ? WELL, LOOK, IT'S AGAINST PARK REGULATIONS... 337 00:25:30,329 --> 00:25:33,933 TO ALLOW FRATERNIZATION BETWEEN THE DOMESTIC ANIMALS AND THE WILDLIFE. 338 00:25:33,933 --> 00:25:38,605 AND FROM THE SMELL OF YOUR DOG, HE'S BEEN FRATERNIZING. REALLY ? 339 00:25:38,605 --> 00:25:40,272 YEAH, JUST KEEP HIM CONFINED TO THE CAMPGROUNDS, 340 00:25:40,272 --> 00:25:43,810 AND, PLEASE, GET HIM CLEANED UP; HE REEKS. 341 00:25:45,912 --> 00:25:48,781 HOW DO I GET RID OF THE SMELL ? 342 00:25:48,781 --> 00:25:51,283 WELL, THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY I KNOW FOR CERTAIN. 343 00:25:51,283 --> 00:25:53,352 UH-HUH ? TOMATO SAUCE. 344 00:25:55,722 --> 00:25:58,891 ANY PARTICULAR KIND OF TOMATO SAUCE ? 345 00:25:58,891 --> 00:26:01,227 SOMETHING WITH BASIL WOULD BE NICE. 346 00:26:13,673 --> 00:26:18,244 NO, NO, NO ! BEETHOVEN ! 347 00:26:18,244 --> 00:26:22,949 OH, NO ! STOP ! STOP ! 348 00:26:34,393 --> 00:26:37,897 GO THROW HIM IN THE LAKE ! 349 00:26:39,866 --> 00:26:42,134 WATCH THE COFFEE, DUDE ! 350 00:26:42,134 --> 00:26:45,371 ICE COFFEE. 351 00:26:45,371 --> 00:26:48,675 OH, I TOLD YOU THEY'D NEVER GET AWAY FROM ME. 352 00:26:48,675 --> 00:26:51,310 DO YOU REMEMBER HOW THEY USED TO LAUGH AT ME IN SCHOOL, WILLIAM ? 353 00:26:51,310 --> 00:26:56,849 ALL THE TIME. ESPECIALLY THE TIME WHEN YOU WERE IN GYM CLASS, AND YOU PEED YOUR PANTS-- 354 00:26:56,849 --> 00:26:59,886 I'M-I'M JUST AN IDIOT. 355 00:26:59,886 --> 00:27:02,689 WELL, WHO'S LAUGHING NOW, WILLIAM ? 356 00:27:02,689 --> 00:27:05,892 I DON'T KNOW. WHO ? OKAY. HERE'S THE PLAN. 357 00:27:05,892 --> 00:27:08,427 WE WAIT UNTIL NIGHT. THEN WE WALTZ IN UNDER COVER OF DARKNESS. 358 00:27:08,427 --> 00:27:10,763 YES, AND WHEN THE FAMILY IS ASLEEP, 359 00:27:10,763 --> 00:27:13,399 WE GRAB THE DVD AND MAKE A STEALTHY RETREAT. 360 00:27:13,399 --> 00:27:16,102 THAT'S A GOOD PLAN. I KNOW IT'S A GOOD PLAN, BECAUSE I MADE UP THE PLAN. 361 00:27:16,102 --> 00:27:18,971 YOU DON'T HAVE TO EXPLAIN-- WHAT ? 362 00:27:18,971 --> 00:27:22,408 IT'S BRAIN FREEZE ! HALF A CUP NEXT TIME, DUDE. 363 00:27:31,150 --> 00:27:34,053 OKAY, BEETHOVEN. INCLUDING THE TOMATO SAUCE, THE MOP... 364 00:27:34,053 --> 00:27:38,190 AND THE BOAT, SO FAR YOU'VE COST US $2,754. 365 00:27:38,190 --> 00:27:40,760 YOU'RE ENJOYING THIS, AREN'T YOU ? SO YOU GOT ANY MONEY ? 366 00:27:40,760 --> 00:27:45,231 DO YOU HAVE A JOB ? THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT. 367 00:27:45,231 --> 00:27:49,836 MOM, LISTEN TO THIS. I FOUND A GREAT ST. BERNARD WEB SITE. 368 00:27:49,836 --> 00:27:53,873 THE ST. BERNARD DOG IS NAMED AFTER THE ST. BERNARD PASS HIGH IN THE SWISS ALPS. 369 00:27:53,873 --> 00:27:57,777 THE MOST FAMOUS ST. BERNARD WAS NAMED BARRY, 370 00:27:57,777 --> 00:28:00,813 AND HE SAVED THE LIVES OF 41 PEOPLE. 371 00:28:00,813 --> 00:28:03,249 WOW. 372 00:28:03,249 --> 00:28:08,354 THE LAST PERSON HE SAVED WAS A LITTLE BOY TRAPPED ON AN ICY LEDGE. 373 00:28:08,354 --> 00:28:11,390 BARRY CARRIED THE BOY BACK TO THE MONKS AT THE HOSPICE, 374 00:28:11,390 --> 00:28:13,793 20 MILES THROUGH THE DEEP SNOW. 375 00:28:17,830 --> 00:28:20,432 OH, MY GOSH ! MOM, LOOK ! 376 00:28:20,432 --> 00:28:22,468 HE LOOKS JUST LIKE BEETHOVEN. 377 00:28:25,972 --> 00:28:27,974 HE DOES. 378 00:28:32,411 --> 00:28:34,380 LET'S SEE. NOW WHERE-- 379 00:28:36,148 --> 00:28:38,717 THERE HE IS, RIGHT WHERE HE LANDED. 380 00:28:42,221 --> 00:28:45,291 JUST ONE TOOTH. OKAY, TIME FOR BED. 381 00:28:47,927 --> 00:28:52,531 COME ON. ARE YOU SURE BEETHOVEN IS GONNA BE OKAY OUTSIDE ? 382 00:28:52,531 --> 00:28:57,336 HONEY, DIDN'T YOU TELL ME HE WAS BUILT TO LIVE IN THE MOUNTAINS ? 383 00:28:57,336 --> 00:29:02,241 - BUT WHAT IF HE GETS LONELY ? - HE WON'T GET LONELY, HONEY. 384 00:29:02,241 --> 00:29:04,443 GOOD NIGHT, SWEETHEART. 385 00:29:05,945 --> 00:29:09,148 - MOM ? - WHAT, HONEY ? 386 00:29:09,148 --> 00:29:11,450 WHY DO YOU HATE BEETHOVEN SO MUCH ? 387 00:29:11,450 --> 00:29:14,320 OH, HONEY, I DON'T HATE BEETHOVEN. 388 00:29:14,320 --> 00:29:19,458 I, I JUST HAVEN'T HAD A CHANCE TO GET TO KNOW HIM YET. 389 00:29:19,458 --> 00:29:22,161 MAYBE BY THE END OF THE TRIP. 390 00:29:22,161 --> 00:29:25,031 - PROMISE ? - I, I PROMISE. 391 00:29:27,133 --> 00:29:28,935 GOOD NIGHT. 392 00:29:38,410 --> 00:29:41,213 WOW, WE GOT TO PUT THIS ON THE ITINERARY. 393 00:29:41,213 --> 00:29:44,050 A LIFE-SIZE PEANUT BUTTER SCULPTURE OF ABRAHAM LINCOLN. 394 00:29:44,050 --> 00:29:46,886 BETH ? 395 00:29:48,120 --> 00:29:52,024 I USED TO BE A NICE PERSON. 396 00:29:52,024 --> 00:29:54,393 YOU'RE STILL A NICE PERSON. I DON'T FEEL LIKE I AM. 397 00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:02,835 REMEMBER THE SUMMER AFTER WE GOT MARRIED ? 398 00:30:04,070 --> 00:30:06,472 - MM-HMM. - YOU AND ME AND THE MOTORCYCLE. 399 00:30:06,472 --> 00:30:10,943 THAT SEEMS SO LONG AGO. HONEY, IT WASN'T THAT LONG AGO 400 00:30:10,943 --> 00:30:13,012 I USED TO BE AN ADVENTUROUS PERSON. 401 00:30:16,115 --> 00:30:21,187 I THINK YOU NEED TO GET BACK IN TOUCH WITH THAT SIDE OF YOURSELF. 402 00:30:21,187 --> 00:30:23,956 WHAT SIDE ? 403 00:30:23,956 --> 00:30:28,294 THE NOT WORRY, ADVENTUROUS, 404 00:30:28,294 --> 00:30:30,329 MESSY SIDE. 405 00:30:30,329 --> 00:30:32,431 I CAN BE MESSY. 406 00:30:40,039 --> 00:30:43,442 WELL, WHAT DO YOU CALL THAT TOMATO SAUCE BATH I HAD TODAY ? 407 00:30:45,411 --> 00:30:47,413 A GOOD START. 408 00:30:56,956 --> 00:30:58,891 GOOD NIGHT, BEETHOVEN. 409 00:31:13,339 --> 00:31:16,342 SHH ! SHH ! SHH ! 410 00:31:16,342 --> 00:31:18,544 SHH ! SHH ! OKAY, OKAY. 411 00:31:21,547 --> 00:31:25,284 HEY, HEY. REMEMBER. THESE THINGS ARE 250 TIMES MORE SENSITIVE... 412 00:31:25,284 --> 00:31:28,020 THAN THE HUMAN EYE, SO DO NOT LOOK INTO ANY LIGHTS. 413 00:31:28,020 --> 00:31:30,289 OKAY, NO LIGHTS. ALL RIGHT. TOMMY, TOMMY, TOMMY. 414 00:31:30,289 --> 00:31:32,591 WHY ARE WE WEARING THESE CAPES ? 415 00:31:32,591 --> 00:31:35,561 THEY ARE CLOAKS, WILLIAM, AND WITH THEM WE BECOME INVISIBLE, 416 00:31:35,561 --> 00:31:39,131 BLENDING INTO OUR SURROUNDINGS LIKE MOON SHADOWS BETWEEN THE TREES. 417 00:31:39,131 --> 00:31:40,967 LOCK IT UP. COME ON. 418 00:31:52,511 --> 00:31:56,048 TOMMY, TOMMY, TOMMY. WHY ARE WE WEARING THE CANISTERS, AGAIN ? 419 00:31:56,048 --> 00:31:58,350 EMERGENCY SMOKE SCREENS. OKAY. 420 00:31:58,350 --> 00:32:01,220 LISTEN. THESE THINGS ARE HIGHLY PRESSURIZED AND HIGHLY ODORIFEROUS. 421 00:32:01,220 --> 00:32:04,456 ONLY USE THEM IN AN EMERGENCY. NO, DON'T TOUCH IT. 422 00:32:04,456 --> 00:32:08,494 REPEAT AFTER ME. I WILL HOLD IN MY GAS, TOMMY. 423 00:32:10,096 --> 00:32:12,331 I WILL HOLD IN MY GAS, TOMMY. GOOD. 424 00:32:12,331 --> 00:32:14,366 FOLLOW ME. SINGLE FILE. 425 00:32:14,366 --> 00:32:17,069 TOMMY. THERE'S ONLY TWO OF US. 426 00:32:17,069 --> 00:32:20,306 ARE YOU ARGUING WITH ME, MISTER ? NO ! SINGLE FILE. 427 00:33:21,800 --> 00:33:24,470 OKAY. SHH ! BE QUIET ! I AM BEING QUIET ! 428 00:33:24,470 --> 00:33:26,538 SHUT UP ! HOLD STILL ! 429 00:33:26,538 --> 00:33:31,610 HOLD STILL ! UP ! UP ! UP ! PUSH ! 430 00:33:33,679 --> 00:33:38,184 - WHAT DO YOU SEE ? - TWO KIDS SLEEPING. 431 00:33:38,184 --> 00:33:39,818 THE DISC, BILL. WHERE IS THE DISC ? 432 00:33:45,491 --> 00:33:47,793 I SEE IT ! I SEE IT ! IT'S RIGHT THERE ! 433 00:33:56,235 --> 00:34:00,306 OH, THAT IS REALLY COOL, TOMMY. WHERE DID YOU GET THAT ? 434 00:34:00,306 --> 00:34:03,209 YOU'RE ON A NEED-TO-KNOW BASIS, AND I DON'T BELIEVE YOU NEED TO KNOW. 435 00:34:12,318 --> 00:34:15,654 TOMMY ! THAT BIG DOG ! 436 00:34:17,623 --> 00:34:21,293 I, I, I-- 437 00:34:23,595 --> 00:34:27,166 - I GOTTA GO TINKLE. - CONTROL YOURSELF. 438 00:34:33,139 --> 00:34:36,742 YOU DON'T NEED TO DESTROY US. 439 00:34:36,742 --> 00:34:39,878 - YOUR POWERS ARE WEAK, OLD DOG. 440 00:34:43,249 --> 00:34:46,485 YOU ARE THE GOOD PUPPY. YES, YOU ARE THE GOOD PUPPY. 441 00:34:46,485 --> 00:34:51,790 WE LOVE THE PUPPY. 442 00:34:51,790 --> 00:34:57,263 - HERE THEY GO AGAIN. WILL YOU SHUT YOUR DOG UP ? 443 00:34:57,263 --> 00:34:59,798 YOU OVER THERE ! BY THE CAMPER ! 444 00:34:59,798 --> 00:35:01,900 THE LIGHTS ! DON'T LOOK AT THE LIGHT, WILLIAM ! 445 00:35:05,137 --> 00:35:06,805 ABORT ! ACTIVATE SMOKE SCREEN ! 446 00:35:06,805 --> 00:35:09,775 RELEASE YOUR GAS, WILLIAM ! 447 00:35:13,279 --> 00:35:16,448 TREE ! OH, WHERE'S THE CAR ? 448 00:35:22,521 --> 00:35:25,591 CAN'T SEE ! I SEE IT ! LET'S GO ! 449 00:35:25,591 --> 00:35:29,295 OKAY ! OH, MY GOD ! OH, MY GOD ! 450 00:35:29,295 --> 00:35:34,266 DON'T WORRY ! OH ! GET IN ! GET IN ! 451 00:35:34,266 --> 00:35:36,802 - LET'S GO ! GO ! - SHUT UP ! YOU'RE WAKING UP THE WHOLE CAMPGROUNDS ! 452 00:35:43,842 --> 00:35:46,678 YOU'RE GOING THE WRONG WAY ! NO, I'M NOT. SHUT UP ! 453 00:35:46,678 --> 00:35:49,548 OKAY, WATCH OUT FOR THE LAKE ! 454 00:35:56,288 --> 00:35:59,291 - WE'RE VERY SORRY, OFFICER. - THAT'S, UH, RANGER. 455 00:35:59,291 --> 00:36:01,727 OFFICER RANGER IT WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN, OFFICER. 456 00:36:01,727 --> 00:36:04,496 RANGER. 457 00:36:04,496 --> 00:36:07,433 OFFICER RANGER. 458 00:36:11,737 --> 00:36:15,507 IF IT HAPPENS AGAIN, I'M GONNA HAVE TO ESCORT YOU AND YOUR DOG OFF THE GROUNDS. 459 00:36:15,507 --> 00:36:17,343 HE'S NOT OUR DOG. 460 00:36:19,445 --> 00:36:22,448 IF IT'S NOT YOUR DOG, I'M GONNA HAVE TO IMPOUND THE STRAY RIGHT NOW. 461 00:36:22,448 --> 00:36:25,951 WHAT MY SON MEANS IS, 462 00:36:25,951 --> 00:36:28,854 IS IT'S NOT OUR DOG... 463 00:36:28,854 --> 00:36:31,957 IN THE SENSE THAT YOU CAN'T REALLY TRULY OWN AN ANIMAL. 464 00:36:31,957 --> 00:36:33,959 WE'RE ALL GOD'S CREATURES. 465 00:36:37,696 --> 00:36:39,865 WELL, LOOK, JUST KEEP YOUR DOG QUIET. 466 00:36:39,865 --> 00:36:41,967 YES, OFFICER RANGER. 467 00:36:50,876 --> 00:36:53,779 SORRY ABOUT THAT, FELLOW CAMPERS. SITUATION UNDER CONTROL. 468 00:36:53,779 --> 00:36:56,515 GOOD NIGHT. 469 00:36:56,515 --> 00:37:00,486 COME ON, COME ON, COME ON. - I DON'T BELIEVE IT. 470 00:37:00,486 --> 00:37:05,291 HE IS ONE OF GOD'S DUMBER CREATURES. HE'S NOT DUMB. 471 00:37:05,291 --> 00:37:09,595 HE SAW SOMETHING. THAT'S WHY HE HOWLED. HE WAS WARNING US. 472 00:37:09,595 --> 00:37:12,964 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ? - TWO MEN. 473 00:37:12,964 --> 00:37:16,902 I SAW THEM DRIVE AWAY, AND I RECOGNIZED THEM FROM ACROSS THE STREET AT OUR HOUSE. 474 00:37:16,902 --> 00:37:21,307 AND THEY WERE FOLLOWING US. IT'S OFFICIAL. SHE'S DREAMING 475 00:37:21,307 --> 00:37:25,544 - I'M SERIOUS. - MAYBE HE'S JUST LONELY. 476 00:37:25,544 --> 00:37:27,245 HE IS OUT HERE ALL BY HIMSELF. 477 00:37:28,447 --> 00:37:31,350 LET'S GO IN. 478 00:37:31,350 --> 00:37:35,554 NO, NO, NO, NO. BEETHOVEN'S STAYING OUTSIDE TONIGHT, AND SO ARE YOU. 479 00:37:35,554 --> 00:37:38,624 - WHAT ? - HONEY, IF HE BARKS AGAIN, THEY'LL MAKE US LEAVE. 480 00:37:38,624 --> 00:37:40,792 - YOU HAVE TO. - OH, COME ON ! 481 00:37:40,792 --> 00:37:43,061 SWEET DREAMS, SWEETHEART. 482 00:37:43,061 --> 00:37:45,964 BETH ! BETH ! HEY, KEEP IT DOWN ! 483 00:37:47,566 --> 00:37:50,902 - HERE YOU GO, DAD. - THANKS, SWEETHEART. 484 00:37:50,902 --> 00:37:53,572 IT'S FOR BEETHOVEN, DAD. 485 00:37:56,942 --> 00:38:01,513 BEETHOVEN, YOU'RE THE BEST DOG ANYONE COULD EVER ASK FOR. 486 00:38:01,513 --> 00:38:05,551 YOU ARE THE STRONGEST AND BRAVEST DOG THAT EVER LIVED. 487 00:38:10,889 --> 00:38:14,025 GOLLY, BEETHOVEN, YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND. 488 00:38:14,025 --> 00:38:15,594 BEST FRIEND. 489 00:38:20,699 --> 00:38:24,870 IT'S A FREE-RANGE WIENIE, BOY ! GO GET IT ! 490 00:38:29,708 --> 00:38:32,878 GO AWAY ! 491 00:38:35,747 --> 00:38:40,452 NO ! NO ! BAD ! NO, NO, NO ! 492 00:38:45,357 --> 00:38:47,626 NICE DOGGIE ! 493 00:38:50,929 --> 00:38:53,999 - HELP ! 494 00:38:53,999 --> 00:38:56,101 STAY AWAY, DOGGIE ! 495 00:39:02,641 --> 00:39:04,910 EXCUSE ME. WHERE IS ALL THE CEREAL ? 496 00:39:04,910 --> 00:39:08,079 BEETHOVEN WAS HUNGRY, SO I FED IT TO HIM. 497 00:39:08,079 --> 00:39:12,951 ALL TEN BOXES ? HE'S A BIG DOG, BRENNAN, IN CASE YOU DIDN'T NOTICE. 498 00:39:12,951 --> 00:39:15,120 OKAY, OKAY. STOP ARGUING. 499 00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:17,022 WE'LL MAKE A DOG FOOD STOP. 500 00:39:25,163 --> 00:39:28,400 HEY, BRENN, I FOUND YOUR HAT. 501 00:39:28,400 --> 00:39:31,069 IT WAS BEHIND THE SOFA. NOW, HOW DID IT GET BEHIND THERE ? 502 00:39:54,493 --> 00:39:56,728 - ALARMED. OH, HO, HO. THEY'RE GOOD. - GOD ! 503 00:39:56,728 --> 00:40:00,799 HEY, WHY DON'T YOU AND I GET SOME COFFEE OVER THERE ? 504 00:40:00,799 --> 00:40:03,201 LET THEM DO THE SHOPPING. OKAY. 505 00:40:03,201 --> 00:40:05,871 UM, ALL RIGHT, BRENNAN. 506 00:40:05,871 --> 00:40:08,907 BE SURE TO GET A RECEIPT, AND GET ENOUGH DOG FOOD TO GET US TO CALIFORNIA. 507 00:40:08,907 --> 00:40:11,076 OKAY ? RIGHT. 508 00:40:11,076 --> 00:40:13,111 WATCH AFTER YOUR SISTER, NOW. HEY ! 509 00:40:13,111 --> 00:40:15,413 THANKS, DAD. 510 00:40:29,060 --> 00:40:31,730 OKAY, KID HAS THE KEYS. I WILL PICK HIS POCKET, 511 00:40:31,730 --> 00:40:34,032 DEACTIVATE THE RV ALARM AND GRAB THE DISC. 512 00:40:34,032 --> 00:40:37,636 WHAT ABOUT THAT DOG ? THAT STUPID DOG IS STILL THERE, TOMMY. 513 00:40:37,636 --> 00:40:40,806 IT'S BIG DOGGIE NIGHT-NIGHT TIME. 514 00:40:40,806 --> 00:40:44,209 HA ! OH ! I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO CHECK FOR FISH. 515 00:40:44,209 --> 00:40:47,479 I DID. I SWEAR. THIS HAS GOT TO BE THE LAST ONE. 516 00:40:58,990 --> 00:41:01,560 STAY HERE. 517 00:41:05,263 --> 00:41:07,966 I WONDER IF THEY HAVE THOSE DOGGIE POWER BARS HERE. 518 00:41:07,966 --> 00:41:10,836 HERE, YOU JUST GO GET THE STUFF. I'M GONNA WAIT OUT HERE. 519 00:41:10,836 --> 00:41:14,272 BUT DAD TOLD YOU TO DO IT. SARA, YOU'RE OLD ENOUGH. 520 00:41:14,272 --> 00:41:17,175 I THINK YOU CAN HANDLE IT. YES, I CAN. 521 00:41:30,989 --> 00:41:34,893 I KNOW THIS ISN'T HOW YOU THOUGHT THE TRIP WOULD GO SO FAR. 522 00:41:34,893 --> 00:41:37,295 IT'S NOT HOW I THOUGHT IT WOULD GO EITHER. 523 00:41:37,295 --> 00:41:39,631 I JUST WANT TO SAY I'M SORRY. 524 00:41:39,631 --> 00:41:42,133 OH, RICHARD, IT HASN'T BEEN THAT BAD. 525 00:41:44,135 --> 00:41:48,807 OKAY, IT'S BEEN BAD, BUT IT'S THE DOG'S FAULT, NOT YOURS. 526 00:41:48,807 --> 00:41:52,778 YOU KNOW, I STILL THINK THERE'S PLENTY OF LAUGHS TO BE HAD... 527 00:41:52,778 --> 00:41:56,181 ON THIS VACATION IF WE JUST FORGET ABOUT BEETHOVEN. 528 00:41:56,181 --> 00:41:58,850 THAT'S RIGHT ! THAT'S IT ! 529 00:41:58,850 --> 00:42:03,555 THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT WE'LL DO. WE'LL FORGET ABOUT BEETHOVEN. YEAH. 530 00:42:22,608 --> 00:42:26,211 EXCUSE ME. YOU LIKE HELLO KITTY ? 531 00:42:26,211 --> 00:42:29,014 UM-- 532 00:42:29,014 --> 00:42:33,351 SO, ENSIGN ? IS THAT YOUR NAME ? 533 00:42:44,963 --> 00:42:49,668 A-ACTUALLY, IT'S BRENNAN. BRENNAN NEWTON. 534 00:42:49,668 --> 00:42:53,605 - HI. - IT WASN'T MINE. IT WAS MY LITTLE SISTER'S. 535 00:42:55,073 --> 00:42:57,375 I MEAN, IT WAS FOR MY LITTLE SISTER'S FRIEND. 536 00:42:57,375 --> 00:43:00,612 HE'S MUCH MORE ENTERTAINING THAN SPARTACUS WAS ON A VACATION. 537 00:43:04,883 --> 00:43:07,285 THEN AGAIN, MAYBE NOT. 538 00:43:09,320 --> 00:43:11,723 HAVEN'T I SEEN YOU BEFORE ? 539 00:43:11,723 --> 00:43:15,694 UH, YEAH, I THINK WE SAW EACH OTHER ON THE ROAD. 540 00:43:27,873 --> 00:43:30,408 - BEETHOVEN ! 541 00:44:15,453 --> 00:44:17,789 - DUMB DOG ! 542 00:44:17,789 --> 00:44:19,457 GOD. 543 00:44:19,457 --> 00:44:22,928 BRENNAN, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT ? 544 00:44:22,928 --> 00:44:25,096 THAT-- UH, I'M FINE ! WAIT A MINUTE ! 545 00:44:25,096 --> 00:44:29,367 WHAT HAPPENED ? BEETHOVEN JUST JUMPED ALL OVER ME FOR NO REASON ! 546 00:44:29,367 --> 00:44:32,237 GOD, HE'S MESSING UP MY LIFE ! 547 00:44:35,240 --> 00:44:37,242 THAT'S GOOD, HONEY. WE GOT TO GO NOW. 548 00:44:37,242 --> 00:44:39,778 MISTER, IS THAT YOUR DOG ? 549 00:44:41,947 --> 00:44:44,382 HOW MUCH ? 550 00:44:44,382 --> 00:44:46,351 I'LL ADD IT UP. 551 00:44:49,087 --> 00:44:50,889 MAN'S BEST FRIEND. 552 00:45:06,071 --> 00:45:10,275 SORRY, BOY. BOSS' ORDERS. 553 00:45:26,124 --> 00:45:29,460 WHAT'S SUMOTOWN ? 554 00:45:29,460 --> 00:45:32,898 I DON'T KNOW. IT WAS BLACK BART'S OLD-TIME WESTERN TOWN WHEN I WAS A KID. 555 00:45:35,533 --> 00:45:39,404 -HI. - WELCOME TO SUMOTOWN HOW MANY ? 556 00:45:39,404 --> 00:45:42,240 UH, TWO ADULTS AND TWO KIDS. 557 00:45:42,240 --> 00:45:45,243 HEY, WHAT HAPPENED TO THE OLD-TIME WESTERN TOWN ? 558 00:45:45,243 --> 00:45:49,347 EH, BANKRUPT. WE BOUGHT IT IN THE EARLY 90s. 559 00:45:49,347 --> 00:45:52,550 HASN'T EXACTLY BEEN A CASH COW, WE THOUGHT. WE'RE SELLING OFF. 560 00:45:52,550 --> 00:45:56,154 YOU WANNA MAKE AN OFFER ? OH, OH, NO, THANKS. 561 00:45:56,154 --> 00:45:58,556 WE'RE JUST GONNA CATCH THE SHOWDOWN ON MAIN STREET. 562 00:45:58,556 --> 00:46:00,826 HEY, THERE STILL IS A MAIN STREET SHOWDOWN, RIGHT ? 563 00:46:00,826 --> 00:46:03,328 HECK YEAH, PARTNER. 564 00:46:03,328 --> 00:46:06,397 RIGHT DOWN THERE. 565 00:46:33,091 --> 00:46:36,327 WHAT ? 566 00:46:36,327 --> 00:46:39,865 IT'S BLACK BART. SEE THE HAT ? CAN SEE A LOT MORE THAN THAT. 567 00:46:39,865 --> 00:46:41,566 HE'S GAINED A FEW POUNDS. SHH. 568 00:46:47,272 --> 00:46:50,341 BOY, THIS REALLY TAKES ME BACK. 569 00:46:50,341 --> 00:46:52,377 TO WHERE, DAD ? 570 00:47:08,293 --> 00:47:10,628 DAD, WHY IS HE LOOKING AT ME ? 571 00:47:17,102 --> 00:47:21,239 BLACK BART SAYS, "WHAT DID YOU CALL ME, BOY ?" 572 00:47:21,239 --> 00:47:23,641 IS HE SERIOUS ? I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ? 573 00:47:23,641 --> 00:47:26,644 WELL, I THINK YOU DID, PARTNER. 574 00:47:26,644 --> 00:47:29,347 I THINK YOU CALLED HIM A LIAR. 575 00:47:34,385 --> 00:47:36,621 MMM. 576 00:47:36,621 --> 00:47:38,890 BLACK BART SAYS... 577 00:47:38,890 --> 00:47:41,559 YOU ARE A YELLOW BELLY, LOWDOWN, 578 00:47:41,559 --> 00:47:45,563 GUTLESS, TENDERFOOT COWARD DOG. 579 00:47:53,171 --> 00:47:55,406 ARE YOU GONNA TAKE THAT ? YEAH, I AM, DAD. 580 00:47:55,406 --> 00:47:58,910 I'M NOT GONNA DO THAT. NO, I'M NOT GONNA-- 581 00:47:58,910 --> 00:48:02,413 NO ! DAD ! DAD ! 582 00:48:02,413 --> 00:48:05,150 IT'S ONLY ACTING, BRENNAN ! 583 00:48:05,150 --> 00:48:06,617 COME ON ! COME ON ! 584 00:48:12,690 --> 00:48:16,427 GO, BRENNAN ! GO ! 585 00:48:41,186 --> 00:48:43,721 OH, IT'S OKAY, HONEY. HONEY, THEY'RE NOT HURTING HIM. 586 00:48:43,721 --> 00:48:45,957 BRENNAN ! BRENNAN ! 587 00:48:45,957 --> 00:48:48,593 BRENNAN ! BRENNAN ! BRENNAN ! BRENNAN ! 588 00:48:59,670 --> 00:49:02,407 NO ! NO ! DON'T SWING ME ! NO ! 589 00:49:02,407 --> 00:49:05,376 I'M GONNA GET SICK ! 590 00:49:22,093 --> 00:49:25,063 YEAH ! 591 00:49:25,063 --> 00:49:27,665 THAT A BOY ! SUMO WARRIOR MAN ! 592 00:49:29,767 --> 00:49:34,072 TOMMY, TELL ME THE TRUTH. 593 00:49:34,072 --> 00:49:35,673 DOES THIS SUIT MAKE ME LOOK FAT ? 594 00:49:45,116 --> 00:49:49,520 WHOA ! 595 00:49:49,520 --> 00:49:54,459 LISTEN TO ME. DADDY NEWTON HAS THE KEY. 596 00:49:54,459 --> 00:49:57,795 WE'RE GONNA SANDWICH HIM BETWEEN OUR SUMO BELLIES, 597 00:49:57,795 --> 00:50:01,466 AND WHEN I'M GOING, "SORRY, EXCUSE ME," AND HE'S GOING, "THAT'S OKAY," 598 00:50:01,466 --> 00:50:03,768 YOU PICK HIS POCKET, AND YOU TAKE THE KEY. 599 00:50:03,768 --> 00:50:08,239 WHAT ABOUT THAT STUPID DOG ? 600 00:50:08,239 --> 00:50:11,642 TOMMY, I HAD ANOTHER NIGHTMARE ABOUT HIM LAST NIGHT. 601 00:50:11,642 --> 00:50:14,579 YOU ARE WEARING A HIGH-DENSITY FOAM, FULLY-NAKED SUMO SUIT. 602 00:50:14,579 --> 00:50:16,347 YOU ARE IMMUNE TO DOGS. 603 00:50:18,716 --> 00:50:21,319 OKAY. BLEND. 604 00:50:35,700 --> 00:50:38,769 HEY, HEY, WHAT'S THE MATTER, PAL ? WHAT'S THE MATTER ? 605 00:50:38,769 --> 00:50:42,840 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST DID THAT TO ME. I'VE NEVER BEEN THIS EMBARRASSED. 606 00:50:42,840 --> 00:50:45,543 THEY WERE LAUGHING. THEY LOVED IT. 607 00:50:45,543 --> 00:50:47,312 THEY WERE LAUGHING AT ME, DAD. 608 00:50:54,785 --> 00:50:57,188 I JUST THOUGHT YOU'D ENJOY DOING SOMETHING I DID WHEN I WAS A KID. 609 00:50:57,188 --> 00:51:01,626 DAD, THIS PLACE WAS LAME 30 YEARS AGO, AND IT'S EVEN WORSE NOW. 610 00:51:01,626 --> 00:51:03,494 DID YOU LIKE IT WHEN YOU WERE A KID ? 611 00:51:03,494 --> 00:51:05,696 YES. 612 00:51:05,696 --> 00:51:07,665 YES, OF COURSE. 613 00:51:15,206 --> 00:51:19,344 D-- STOP, YOU IDIOT. 614 00:51:19,344 --> 00:51:23,214 I'M SORRY, DAD, BUT THIS, THIS WHOLE TRIP... 615 00:51:23,214 --> 00:51:27,252 HAS BEEN NOTHING BUT BORESVILLE, AND IT HASN'T EVEN BEEN A WEEK YET. 616 00:51:47,405 --> 00:51:50,575 THANK YOU. 617 00:51:50,575 --> 00:51:53,811 - BEETHOVEN, NO ! STOP ! - BEETHOVEN, SIT ! 618 00:51:53,811 --> 00:51:55,713 BEETHOVEN ! 619 00:52:07,625 --> 00:52:09,427 YOU CALL THAT BORING ? 620 00:52:09,427 --> 00:52:11,829 BEETHOVEN, STAY ! 621 00:52:14,732 --> 00:52:18,469 WHAT HAPPENED ? OH, STRANGELY, BEETHOVEN RAN AWAY AGAIN. 622 00:52:27,345 --> 00:52:29,914 GET IN ! GET IN ! 623 00:52:29,914 --> 00:52:33,884 I TOLD YOU WE SHOULD HAVE TAKEN YOUR MOM'S MINIVAN ! 624 00:52:47,898 --> 00:52:50,768 GOOD JOB. COME ON, BEETHOVEN. 625 00:53:00,578 --> 00:53:03,381 SO WHAT DID BLACK BART SAY ? I DON'T KNOW. 626 00:53:03,381 --> 00:53:07,852 HE TOOK MY CHECK, THOUGH. THOSE BARRELS ARE APPARENTLY ANTIQUE. 627 00:53:07,852 --> 00:53:10,721 IT WAS THOSE GUYS AGAIN. 628 00:53:10,721 --> 00:53:14,259 HERE WE GO AGAIN. THE BAD GUYS ARE FOLLOWING US. 629 00:53:14,259 --> 00:53:18,263 SHUT UP, BRENNAN. BRENNAN, BE NICE TO YOUR SISTER. 630 00:53:18,263 --> 00:53:21,999 SWEETHEART, REMEMBER WHEN YOU THOUGHT THAT BLANKET IN THE CLOSET WAS A GRIZZLY BEAR... 631 00:53:21,999 --> 00:53:24,569 OR WHEN YOU THOUGHT THE NEIGHBORS WERE STEALING YOUR PAJAMAS ? 632 00:53:24,569 --> 00:53:28,506 WHAT'S YOUR POINT, MOM ? HONEY, THOSE BANDIDOS WERE JUST ACTORS. 633 00:53:34,712 --> 00:53:37,782 HOW COME NO ONE BELIEVES ME ? 634 00:53:37,782 --> 00:53:40,017 NO ONE EXCEPT FOR YOU, BEETHOVEN. 635 00:53:53,764 --> 00:53:55,600 BEETHOVEN ! 636 00:53:58,469 --> 00:54:01,806 - HEY, THAT'S MY PACK ! 637 00:54:10,748 --> 00:54:13,951 - IS THAT YOUR DOG ? - YEAH, SORRY. 638 00:54:15,320 --> 00:54:17,054 ACTUALLY, HE'S MINE. 639 00:54:17,054 --> 00:54:20,558 OH, HI, AGAIN. 640 00:54:20,558 --> 00:54:22,860 HI. 641 00:54:22,860 --> 00:54:25,630 OH, I'M SORRY. 642 00:54:32,803 --> 00:54:35,072 I WISH WE COULD HAVE BROUGHT OUR DOG ON OUR TRIP, 643 00:54:35,072 --> 00:54:37,342 BUT HE HAD TO STAY IN A KENNEL TILL WE GOT BACK. 644 00:54:37,342 --> 00:54:39,810 A KENNEL ? THAT'S TOUGH. 645 00:54:39,810 --> 00:54:42,413 I THINK PUTTING A DOG IN A KENNEL IS JUST... CRUEL. 646 00:54:42,413 --> 00:54:44,615 THAT'S WHAT I TOLD MY PARENTS. 647 00:54:45,750 --> 00:54:48,653 SO, I'M BRENNAN. 648 00:54:48,653 --> 00:54:51,356 I KNOW. WE MET BEFORE. 649 00:54:53,057 --> 00:54:57,428 OH, RIGHT. UM, SORRY. 650 00:54:57,428 --> 00:55:00,631 IT'S OKAY. WE KIND OF GOT INTERRUPTED BEFORE. 651 00:55:00,631 --> 00:55:04,101 UM, I'M PENNY. SO WHERE YOU GUYS HEADED ? 652 00:55:04,101 --> 00:55:07,338 SOME FAMILY REUNION IN CALIFORNIA. 653 00:55:07,338 --> 00:55:10,608 I GOT ANOTHER WEEK AND A HALF STUCK IN THAT RV WITH MY FAMILY. 654 00:55:10,608 --> 00:55:13,678 TELL ME ABOUT IT. THIS HAS BEEN OUR MOST BORING VACATION EVER. 655 00:55:13,678 --> 00:55:17,948 - THE WORST. - MY DAD IS ON SOME MISSION TO GIVE US A KILLER VACATION. 656 00:55:17,948 --> 00:55:20,651 I KNOW. MY DAD'S GONE TOTALLY INSANE OVER THIS TRIP. 657 00:55:20,651 --> 00:55:23,120 MY WHOLE SUMMER'S GONE-- WASTED. 658 00:55:23,120 --> 00:55:25,390 AND BY THE TIME I GET BACK, IT'S GONNA BE TIME FOR SCHOOL AGAIN. 659 00:55:25,390 --> 00:55:27,625 YEAH, SAME HERE. 660 00:55:37,402 --> 00:55:40,104 WELL, I'M DOWN THERE. 661 00:55:40,104 --> 00:55:43,040 BYE. BYE. 662 00:55:44,675 --> 00:55:47,978 - GOOD NIGHT. - GOOD NIGHT. 663 00:55:51,148 --> 00:55:53,050 SO ASK HER FOR HER PHONE NUMBER. 664 00:55:53,050 --> 00:55:55,486 SHUT UP, SARA. 665 00:55:55,486 --> 00:55:57,655 THAT'S A GOOD IDEA. HERE. 666 00:55:59,056 --> 00:56:01,158 I WAS GONNA ASK, YOU KNOW. 667 00:56:01,158 --> 00:56:04,529 UM, HERE'S MY ITINERARY TOO. 668 00:56:04,529 --> 00:56:07,632 MAYBE WE'LL STAY AT THE SAME PLACE AGAIN. MAYBE. 669 00:56:07,632 --> 00:56:09,867 OKAY. 670 00:56:09,867 --> 00:56:13,504 BYE. BYE. 671 00:56:13,504 --> 00:56:15,372 GOOD NIGHT. BYE. 672 00:56:16,674 --> 00:56:19,877 BYE. LET ME HOLD HIM. 673 00:56:19,877 --> 00:56:21,912 WHY ? YOU DON'T LIKE HIM. 674 00:56:21,912 --> 00:56:23,914 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ? I LOVE DOGS. 675 00:56:23,914 --> 00:56:28,018 ESPECIALLY ST. BERNARDS. WHATEVER. 676 00:56:28,018 --> 00:56:31,522 * ON THE ROAD AGAIN 677 00:56:31,522 --> 00:56:34,559 * JUST CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 678 00:56:36,060 --> 00:56:39,664 * I FOUND LOVE IS MAKING MUSIC WITH MY FRIENDS * 679 00:56:39,664 --> 00:56:43,167 * AND I CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 680 00:56:43,167 --> 00:56:46,571 * ON THE ROAD AGAIN 681 00:56:46,571 --> 00:56:50,941 * GOIN' PLACES THAT I'VE NEVER BEEN * 682 00:56:50,941 --> 00:56:54,745 * SEEIN' THINGS THAT I MAY NEVER SEE AGAIN * 683 00:56:54,745 --> 00:56:57,948 * AND I CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 684 00:56:57,948 --> 00:57:00,851 * ON THE ROAD AGAIN 685 00:57:00,851 --> 00:57:04,955 * LIKE A BAND OF GYPSIES WE GO DOWN THE HIGHWAY * 686 00:57:04,955 --> 00:57:07,892 * WE'RE THE BEST OF FRIENDS 687 00:57:07,892 --> 00:57:11,562 * INSISTING THAT THE WORLD KEEP TURNING OUR WAY * NO, BEETHOVEN. DON'T DO THAT ! 688 00:57:11,562 --> 00:57:13,464 JUST GET HIM AWAY. * AND OUR WAY 689 00:57:13,464 --> 00:57:16,867 * IS ON THE ROAD AGAIN 690 00:57:16,867 --> 00:57:19,537 * I JUST CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 691 00:57:21,171 --> 00:57:25,109 * AND I FOUND LOVE IS MAKING MUSIC WITH MY FRIENDS * 692 00:57:25,109 --> 00:57:28,646 * AND I CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 693 00:57:41,526 --> 00:57:43,794 OH ! OH ! YOU FED HIM WHAT ? 694 00:57:43,794 --> 00:57:47,031 OH, LOOK AT THIS ! HE BURNED A HOLE IN THE COUCH. 695 00:57:48,065 --> 00:57:50,067 WHO FED HIM EGGS ? 696 00:58:06,751 --> 00:58:09,587 * ON THE ROAD AGAIN 697 00:58:09,587 --> 00:58:13,023 BEETHOVEN ! * LIKE A BAND OF GYPSIES WE GO DOWN THE HIGHWAY * 698 00:58:13,023 --> 00:58:16,026 * WE'RE THE BEST OF FRIENDS 699 00:58:16,026 --> 00:58:20,230 - * INSISTING THAT THE WORLD KEEP TURNING OUR WAY * - BEETHOVEN ! 700 00:58:20,230 --> 00:58:24,101 * AND OUR WAY IS ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 701 00:58:24,101 --> 00:58:28,973 * I JUST CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 702 00:58:28,973 --> 00:58:33,177 * AND I FOUND LOVE IS MAKING MUSIC WITH MY FRIENDS * 703 00:58:33,177 --> 00:58:37,147 * AND I CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 704 00:58:37,147 --> 00:58:42,219 * NO, I CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 705 00:58:42,219 --> 00:58:45,756 * OH, I CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 706 00:58:45,756 --> 00:58:47,592 OH ! 707 00:58:49,694 --> 00:58:52,663 IT'S TOTALLY CLOGGED WITH DOG HAIR ! 708 00:58:52,663 --> 00:58:56,934 WE HAVE TO FIND THE MAIN JUNCTION SEWAGE CONTROL. 709 00:58:56,934 --> 00:58:59,837 THAT'S THE ONLY WAY WE'RE GONNA DUMP THE WASTE WATER NOW. 710 00:59:06,711 --> 00:59:08,879 - CAN I JUST SAY ONE THING ? - YES, YOU CAN. 711 00:59:08,879 --> 00:59:11,716 AND YOU KNOW WHAT YOU CAN SAY ? YOU CAN SAY, 712 00:59:11,716 --> 00:59:15,920 "I WILL NOT OPEN MY BIG FAT MOUTH, TOMMY, UNTIL WE FIND THE DVD !" 713 00:59:15,920 --> 00:59:19,824 TOMMY, LISTEN, WE HAVE BEEN FOLLOWING THOSE NEWTONS FOR A VERY LONG TIME NOW. 714 00:59:19,824 --> 00:59:23,594 DUH, WHINEY PANTS. YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW THAT ? 715 00:59:23,594 --> 00:59:28,098 WELL, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE YOU SAID IT WAS GONNA BE SO EASY. 716 00:59:28,098 --> 00:59:31,101 SO HELP ME GOD, IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP, I WILL MAKE YOU EAT SAND. 717 00:59:34,338 --> 00:59:37,007 WHAT ARE WE DOING ? WE ARE HAVING A PROBLEM. 718 00:59:37,007 --> 00:59:41,078 YEAH, YEAH, I KNOW THAT ! IT'S BEEN LIKE A WEEK, AND WE DON'T HAVE THE DVD YET ! 719 00:59:41,078 --> 00:59:45,249 I WILL MAKE YOU EAT SAND ! WE'RE HAVING TIRE TROUBLE ! 720 00:59:48,152 --> 00:59:52,256 WE'RE NOT HAVING TIRE TROUBLE. THE TIRES ARE PERFECTLY FINE. 721 00:59:52,256 --> 00:59:55,325 YOU JUST PULLED OVER AND JACKED UP THE CAR WHY ? 722 01:00:04,001 --> 01:00:07,972 YOU POPPED TWO TIRES, AND WE ONLY HAVE ONE SPARE. 723 01:00:07,972 --> 01:00:11,141 LORD, YOU GAVE HIM BRAINS, BUT HE DOES NOT THINK. 724 01:00:11,141 --> 01:00:13,978 YOU GAVE HIM A MOUTH WHICH HE NEVER SHUTS UP ! 725 01:00:13,978 --> 01:00:16,881 LISTEN TO ME, YOU BRUSSEL SPROUT. 726 01:00:16,881 --> 01:00:20,350 WITH TWO SLASHED TIRES, IT'S TWICE AS LIKELY... 727 01:00:20,350 --> 01:00:22,753 THAT THE NEWTONS WILL PULL OVER TO HELP US. 728 01:00:22,753 --> 01:00:24,989 SO, WE WILL WAVE THEM DOWN, 729 01:00:24,989 --> 01:00:27,992 ASK THEM TO TAKE US TO THE NEAREST GAS STATION, 730 01:00:27,992 --> 01:00:32,329 AND WHILE WE ARE ON BOARD THE RV WE WILL TAKE THE DISC WITHOUT ANYONE KNOWING. 731 01:00:32,329 --> 01:00:36,166 BLAST OFF ! WHAT ? WHAT, WHAT ? 732 01:00:38,368 --> 01:00:42,206 YOUR PLAN IS BRILLIANT, TOMMY. I'M, I'M, I'M SORRY THAT I DOUBTED YOU. 733 01:00:42,206 --> 01:00:45,710 OH, IT'S OKAY. I KNOW. IT'S JUST I NEED COFFEE. 734 01:00:45,710 --> 01:00:49,213 YOU KNOW, DAD, I WAS THINKING IT MIGHT BE FUN TO STAY AT A HOTEL FOR A NIGHT. 735 01:00:49,213 --> 01:00:52,783 NO WAY. THEY DON'T LET IN PETS. 736 01:00:52,783 --> 01:00:55,252 - THE RV'S A HOTEL ON WHEELS. 737 01:00:55,252 --> 01:00:57,855 I DON'T KNOW, DAD. I JUST THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE FUN. 738 01:00:57,855 --> 01:01:00,825 AND I FOUND THIS REALLY FUN-LOOKING PLACE. 739 01:01:00,825 --> 01:01:04,228 A FOUR-STAR HOTEL. DOESN'T THAT SOUND GREAT ? 740 01:01:04,228 --> 01:01:06,831 NO. THEY DON'T LET IN PETS. 741 01:01:06,831 --> 01:01:08,833 - OHHH. - BEGIN THE COUNTDOWN. 742 01:01:08,833 --> 01:01:11,435 TEN ! NINE ! WAVE YOUR ARMS. 743 01:01:11,435 --> 01:01:14,004 WAVE YOUR ARMS. EIGHT ! 744 01:01:14,004 --> 01:01:17,074 WHAT'S THIS SUDDEN INTEREST IN HOTELS ? 745 01:01:17,074 --> 01:01:19,409 - DOWN, BOY ! 746 01:01:19,409 --> 01:01:21,979 GET HIM OFF THE BRAKE ! THE BRAKE ! 747 01:01:27,351 --> 01:01:32,489 SARA, HONEY, YOU CAN'T LET BEETHOVEN DO THINGS LIKE THAT. IT'S VERY DANGEROUS. 748 01:01:32,489 --> 01:01:35,092 OH, HERE IT IS. 749 01:01:35,092 --> 01:01:39,229 - HERE'S WHAT ? - THE MAIN SEWAGE CONTROL VALVE. 750 01:01:42,800 --> 01:01:45,369 OH, BOY, I'M GLAD I FOUND THAT. 751 01:01:45,369 --> 01:01:48,338 WHEN WE GET TO THE NEXT CAMPGROUND, REMIND ME TO DUMP THE TANKS... 752 01:01:48,338 --> 01:01:50,975 OR IT'S GONNA GET REALLY STINKY IN HERE. 753 01:01:50,975 --> 01:01:55,412 IT'S NUMBER TWO ! 754 01:01:55,412 --> 01:01:57,247 SARA, HOW FAR TO THE NEXT STOP ? 755 01:01:59,416 --> 01:02:02,219 ONLY ABOUT TEN MILES, DAD. 756 01:02:02,219 --> 01:02:05,422 OH, YOU'RE GONNA LOVE THIS, BRENN. THIS PLACE IS RAD. 757 01:02:05,422 --> 01:02:08,793 RAD ? IT'S THE BIGGEST TOY TRAIN IN THE WORLD. 758 01:02:08,793 --> 01:02:11,528 BOY, I LOVED IT WHEN I WAS A KID. 759 01:02:11,528 --> 01:02:14,164 WOW, DAD. I CAN'T WAIT. 760 01:02:34,318 --> 01:02:36,921 THIS IS SO LAME. 761 01:02:36,921 --> 01:02:39,824 LET'S GO, BEETHOVEN. 762 01:02:39,824 --> 01:02:42,993 THE KIDS ARE REALLY GETTING ATTACHED TO BEETHOVEN. 763 01:02:42,993 --> 01:02:46,997 I THINK THEY LIKE HIM BETTER THAN THEY LIKE ME. NAH, I'M JUST BEING INSECURE. 764 01:02:46,997 --> 01:02:50,300 NOT NECESSARILY. THANKS, HONEY. I FEEL BETTER NOW. 765 01:02:50,300 --> 01:02:54,538 YOU KNOW, RICHARD, I THINK THAT DOG IS CONSCIOUSLY TRYING TO SABOTAGE OUR TRIP. 766 01:02:54,538 --> 01:02:57,908 BETH, HE'S JUST A DOG. 767 01:02:57,908 --> 01:03:01,511 HONEY, HE CAN'T CONSCIOUSLY RUIN ANYTHING... 768 01:03:01,511 --> 01:03:04,548 I DON'T THINK. 769 01:03:04,548 --> 01:03:08,052 NAH, THAT'S CRAZY. WHAT WOULD HIS MOTIVE BE ? 770 01:03:08,052 --> 01:03:11,021 REVENGE, FOR THE KENNEL THING. 771 01:03:14,458 --> 01:03:18,228 YOU KNOW, ONE THING ABOUT HIM DOES BOTHER ME, THOUGH. HALLELUJAH. 772 01:03:18,228 --> 01:03:21,098 HOW DO YOU THINK BRENNAN AND SARA ARE GONNA TAKE IT... 773 01:03:21,098 --> 01:03:23,834 WHEN WE HAVE TO GIVE BEETHOVEN BACK TO MY BROTHER ? 774 01:03:23,834 --> 01:03:25,535 THAT'S GONNA BE A TOUGH ONE. YEAH. 775 01:03:30,474 --> 01:03:32,877 THIS IS SMALLER THAN I REMEMBER. 776 01:04:10,214 --> 01:04:13,283 WHOA ! 777 01:04:48,685 --> 01:04:51,455 YES. BILL. BILL ! 778 01:04:51,455 --> 01:04:54,458 TOMMY ! WHAT HAPPENED ? 779 01:04:54,458 --> 01:04:57,995 TOMMY, COME HERE. 780 01:04:57,995 --> 01:05:00,364 IT IS SO NICE IN HERE. 781 01:05:02,933 --> 01:05:06,103 - BEETHOVEN, STOP ! 782 01:05:06,103 --> 01:05:09,006 HEY ! BEETHOVEN ! 783 01:05:09,006 --> 01:05:13,677 IT HAS A COFFEE MAKER ! WHEN WE GET RICH, CAN WE GET ONE OF THESE ? 784 01:05:13,677 --> 01:05:18,648 YEAH, UH-HUH. LOOK, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW EASY IT IS FOR COPS TO TRACK DOWN AN RV THIS SIZE ? 785 01:05:18,648 --> 01:05:21,218 THEY WILL SWOOP DOWN ON YOU IN A HOT SECOND, 786 01:05:21,218 --> 01:05:24,588 AND THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW, YOU'RE SPENDING 15 TO 20 YEARS AS THE RESTROOM ATTENDANT... 787 01:05:24,588 --> 01:05:27,724 AT A ONE-STAR FEDERAL LOCKDOWN FACILITY CLEANING UNFLUSHED TOILETS WITH A TOOTHBRUSH. 788 01:05:27,724 --> 01:05:31,261 CLUB-FED I THINK NOT. I NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT. 789 01:05:31,261 --> 01:05:33,563 WELL, THINKING IS NOT WHAT YOU DO BEST, WILLIAM. NO. 790 01:05:33,563 --> 01:05:35,599 FETCH THE DVD. YES. 791 01:05:40,504 --> 01:05:43,540 OH. OOPS. 792 01:05:43,540 --> 01:05:46,210 I-I'M NOT HAVING MUCH LUCK. 793 01:05:49,646 --> 01:05:52,716 OH, WHO TOLD YOU WE'D FIND IT ? YES ! YOU DID. 794 01:05:52,716 --> 01:05:56,053 YOU DA MAN ! YES, I AM DA MAN ! 795 01:05:56,053 --> 01:05:58,055 LET US VACATE. 796 01:06:00,224 --> 01:06:02,759 TOMMY ! HE LOOKS EVEN BIGGER UP CLOSE. 797 01:06:02,759 --> 01:06:06,997 YES, HE DOES, WILLIAM. WHY DIDN'T YOU CLOSE THAT DOOR ? 798 01:06:06,997 --> 01:06:10,234 YOU WERE THE LAST ONE IN. HERE'S AN IDEA-- RUN ! 799 01:06:10,234 --> 01:06:13,770 LET ME OUT OF HERE ! 800 01:06:13,770 --> 01:06:18,442 - OH, GOD, LET ME OUT ! 801 01:06:18,442 --> 01:06:21,078 TOMMY ! 802 01:06:24,248 --> 01:06:27,184 HEY ! OUT OF THE WAY ! 803 01:06:33,290 --> 01:06:36,293 TOMMY ! 804 01:06:36,293 --> 01:06:39,296 WAIT ! 805 01:06:39,296 --> 01:06:41,598 NO ! 806 01:06:41,598 --> 01:06:45,202 TOMMY, WAIT ! 807 01:06:45,202 --> 01:06:47,637 OH, THANKS ! 808 01:06:54,278 --> 01:06:57,581 NOW WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO ? IT'S-IT'S NOT SO BAD. 809 01:06:57,581 --> 01:07:01,685 THE WINDSHIELD IS BROKEN. RICHARD. 810 01:07:01,685 --> 01:07:03,787 NOT YOUR SIDE. 811 01:07:18,335 --> 01:07:22,306 I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M SO WORRIED ABOUT. YOU GOT INSURANCE ON THE RV. 812 01:07:22,306 --> 01:07:27,511 WE'RE COVERED. WE'RE MOTORING ALONG. IT'S STILL A VACATION. 813 01:07:27,511 --> 01:07:30,814 GOOD, HONEY. THAT'S A GOOD ATTITUDE. 814 01:07:30,814 --> 01:07:35,785 NO, IT'S NOT. IT'S A LIE. THIS IS A DISASTER. 815 01:07:35,785 --> 01:07:39,256 THIS WHOLE TRIP HAS BECOME A CATASTROPHE BECAUSE OF THAT DOG ! 816 01:07:39,256 --> 01:07:41,658 HE DIDN'T MEAN IT, MOM. 817 01:07:41,658 --> 01:07:44,094 YES, HE DID ! 818 01:07:46,363 --> 01:07:49,833 MOM, DAD, YOU KNOW THAT HOTEL I WAS MENTIONING ? 819 01:07:49,833 --> 01:07:52,769 IT'S PRETTY CLOSE BY. 820 01:07:52,769 --> 01:07:56,240 WE ARE NOT STAYING IN A HOTEL. 821 01:07:56,240 --> 01:08:01,211 I DIDN'T STAY IN A HOTEL ON MY CHILDHOOD MOTOR HOME TRIP, AND WE AIN'T STAYING IN ONE NOW. 822 01:08:01,211 --> 01:08:03,780 WE'RE FINE RIGHT HERE IN OUR HOME ON WHEELS ! EVERYONE GOT THAT ? 823 01:08:10,187 --> 01:08:12,156 WHOA. 824 01:08:15,259 --> 01:08:17,461 I THINK BEETHOVEN HAS TO GO. 825 01:08:17,461 --> 01:08:20,730 - HONEY, YOU AGREE ? - NO, I MEAN NUMBER ONE. 826 01:08:20,730 --> 01:08:23,667 - STOP THE RV. - OH, NO, NOT AG-- 827 01:08:34,278 --> 01:08:36,613 HEIMLICH ! HEIMLICH ! 828 01:08:46,290 --> 01:08:50,694 MAKE SURE BEETHOVEN GOES GOOD, 'CAUSE WE'RE NOT STOPPING AGAIN UNTIL WE GET TO CALIFORNIA ! 829 01:08:53,563 --> 01:08:56,766 ALL I WANTED TO DO IS GIVE MY FAMILY A GREAT VACATION. 830 01:08:56,766 --> 01:08:58,802 IT'S BEEN ONE DISASTER AFTER ANOTHER. 831 01:09:02,839 --> 01:09:06,210 THIS IS EVEN WORSE THAN THE MOTOR HOME VACATION I HAD AS A KID. 832 01:09:06,210 --> 01:09:08,845 - WHAT ? - I THOUGHT YOU LOVED THAT TRIP. 833 01:09:08,845 --> 01:09:11,815 I HATED IT. 834 01:09:11,815 --> 01:09:15,185 WELL, THEN WHY DO YOU KEEP TELLING US HOW MUCH YOU LOVED IT ? 835 01:09:15,185 --> 01:09:18,588 BECAUSE I WANTED TO REMEMBER IT THAT WAY. 836 01:09:18,588 --> 01:09:22,359 I WANTED TO FORGET HOW BAD IT REALLY WAS. 837 01:09:22,359 --> 01:09:26,430 AND THE TRUTH IS... IT WAS HORRIBLE. 838 01:09:26,430 --> 01:09:29,599 MY BROTHER AND I FOUGHT THE WHOLE 2,000 MILES. 839 01:09:29,599 --> 01:09:33,337 AND SPARTACUS, OUR DOG, WAS CAR SICK. 840 01:09:33,337 --> 01:09:36,873 CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT ? A CAR SICK DOG. 841 01:09:36,873 --> 01:09:39,476 IT WAS HORRIBLE. MY MOTHER-- 842 01:09:39,476 --> 01:09:43,347 MY MOTHER KEPT TELLING US HOW MUCH FUN WE WERE HAVING, BUT WE WEREN'T HAVING ANY FUN. 843 01:09:43,347 --> 01:09:47,984 MY DAD DROVE HIMSELF CRAZY TRYING TO MAKE SURE WE HAD FUN. 844 01:09:47,984 --> 01:09:51,355 IT'S OKAY, DADDY. WE KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. 845 01:09:51,355 --> 01:09:53,957 YEAH, DAD. WE KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL. 846 01:09:55,525 --> 01:09:58,962 - OH, SHUT UP ! 847 01:10:01,931 --> 01:10:03,767 - OW ! - HONEY ! 848 01:10:03,767 --> 01:10:05,802 I'M OKAY. 849 01:10:08,905 --> 01:10:10,874 I'M ALL RIGHT. 850 01:10:17,947 --> 01:10:20,917 AT LEAST WE'RE OUT OF THE BUG ZONE, HONEY. 851 01:10:20,917 --> 01:10:24,354 THAT'S IT. WE'RE TAKING A NIGHT OFF FROM THIS VACATION. 852 01:10:24,354 --> 01:10:26,390 WE'RE STAYING IN A HOTEL. YES ! 853 01:10:26,390 --> 01:10:28,725 THE DOG HAS EATEN UP ALL OUR RESERVE CASH. 854 01:10:28,725 --> 01:10:31,528 WE CAN'T AFFORD TO STAY IN A HOTEL. 855 01:10:31,528 --> 01:10:34,331 BETH, WE CAN'T AFFORD NOT TO STAY IN A HOTEL TONIGHT. 856 01:10:41,037 --> 01:10:43,940 I'LL TAKE THESE INSIDE, AND I'LL BE BACK FOR THE OTHERS. 857 01:10:43,940 --> 01:10:46,976 WE HAVE ADJOINING ROOMS AVAILABLE. 858 01:10:46,976 --> 01:10:50,580 HOWEVER, WE DO NOT ALLOW ANIMALS IN THE ROOMS. 859 01:10:50,580 --> 01:10:54,518 HOTEL POLICY. IF I MADE AN EXCEPTION, I COULD GET FIRED. 860 01:10:54,518 --> 01:10:57,521 IS THIS REALLY THAT GREAT A JOB ? 861 01:10:57,521 --> 01:11:01,591 DAD, BEETHOVEN HAS TO BE ABLE TO STAY TOO. 862 01:11:04,494 --> 01:11:08,765 HE WOULDN'T EVEN NEED A BED. HE'S THE QUIET TYPE. 863 01:11:08,765 --> 01:11:11,668 SO HOW DOES IT LOOK ? I CAN'T FIND HER. 864 01:11:11,668 --> 01:11:14,338 WHO ? WHAT ? 865 01:11:14,338 --> 01:11:17,607 WHO CAN'T YOU FIND, HONEY ? 866 01:11:17,607 --> 01:11:19,676 THE GIFT SHOP. THE GIFT SHOP. OH. 867 01:11:19,676 --> 01:11:22,312 I JUST THOUGHT I'D GET SOMETHING... 868 01:11:22,312 --> 01:11:25,782 FOR AUNT ALICE AND UNCLE GEORGE FROM THE GIFT SHOP. 869 01:11:25,782 --> 01:11:29,285 UH, KEEP ME COMPANY, BEETHOVEN. 870 01:11:32,489 --> 01:11:35,725 - PLEASE. - POLICY. 871 01:11:35,725 --> 01:11:40,364 SARA, HONEY, BEETHOVEN'S JUST GONNA HAVE TO SPEND THE NIGHT IN THE RV, OKAY ? 872 01:11:41,531 --> 01:11:43,967 HONEY, STAND UP. 873 01:11:43,967 --> 01:11:46,536 STAND UP. 874 01:11:53,877 --> 01:11:57,781 COME ON, BOY. LET'S SEE HOW GOOD YOU ARE. FIND HER, BOY ! FIND HER ! 875 01:12:42,158 --> 01:12:45,829 BEETHOVEN, YOUR NOSE IS A GENIUS. 876 01:12:48,532 --> 01:12:51,067 COME ON, BOY. 877 01:13:10,820 --> 01:13:14,491 ARE YOU SURE BEETHOVEN'S GONNA BE OKAY IN THE RV ALL ALONE ? 878 01:13:14,491 --> 01:13:17,694 WE GAVE HIM HIS DINNER. HE'S BEEN WALKED. 879 01:13:17,694 --> 01:13:20,864 HE HAS WATER. HE'S GOT HIS OWN BACHELOR APARTMENT. 880 01:13:21,965 --> 01:13:24,568 HONEY, HE'LL BE FINE. 881 01:13:24,568 --> 01:13:27,537 NOW, MOMMY AND I ARE GONNA GO TO SLEEP EARLY. 882 01:13:27,537 --> 01:13:29,473 SO JUST STAY IN THE ROOM, OKAY ? 883 01:13:32,008 --> 01:13:35,445 CAN WE STAY UP LATE, WATCH MOVIES AND EAT JUNK ? 884 01:13:35,445 --> 01:13:37,547 SURE. JUST STAY IN THE ROOM. 885 01:13:37,547 --> 01:13:41,117 OKAY ? YEAH, DAD, I GOT IT. 886 01:13:41,117 --> 01:13:43,587 OKAY. GOOD NIGHT, GUYS. 887 01:13:43,587 --> 01:13:46,189 GOOD NIGHT, DAD. GOOD NIGHT, DAD. 888 01:14:02,872 --> 01:14:04,874 GOOD NIGHT, BEETHOVEN. 889 01:14:07,143 --> 01:14:10,614 PENNY MILLER'S ROOM, PLEASE. THANK YOU. 890 01:14:10,614 --> 01:14:13,650 - WHO ? - SHHH. 891 01:14:13,650 --> 01:14:16,085 MRS. PENNY MILL-- I MEAN-- 892 01:14:16,085 --> 01:14:20,156 UH, YES, MRS. PENNY MILLER, THIS IS, UM, THE FRONT DESK, 893 01:14:20,156 --> 01:14:25,629 AND WE THINK YOU MAY HAVE LEFT SOME PERSONAL ITEMS AT THE POOL TODAY. 894 01:14:25,629 --> 01:14:28,532 UM, WOULD YOU COME DOWN AND CLAIM THEM, PLEASE ? 895 01:14:28,532 --> 01:14:31,100 - OOH-OOH. - UM, TOMORROW MORNING ? 896 01:14:31,100 --> 01:14:35,539 UH, YES, I SUPPOSE THAT WOULD WORK OUT FINE. THANK YOU. 897 01:14:35,539 --> 01:14:38,908 WHAT HAPPENED TO "HI, IT'S BRENNAN. WE MET AT THE CAMPGROUND" ? 898 01:14:38,908 --> 01:14:42,812 UM... 899 01:14:42,812 --> 01:14:45,949 YOU'RE TOO YOUNG TO UNDERSTAND THESE THINGS. 900 01:14:45,949 --> 01:14:49,653 - ARE YOU GONNA GO MEET HER ? - TOMORROW, I GUESS. 901 01:14:53,557 --> 01:14:55,258 FINE. 902 01:14:59,663 --> 01:15:02,231 - SEE YA. - WHAT ARE YOU DOING ? 903 01:15:02,231 --> 01:15:05,134 DIDN'T YOU HEAR WHAT DAD SAID ? 904 01:15:05,134 --> 01:15:07,637 WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING ? 905 01:15:07,637 --> 01:15:10,540 I'M GONNA SLEEP WITH BEETHOVEN SO HE WON'T GET LONELY. 906 01:15:10,540 --> 01:15:13,176 MOM AND DAD ARE GONNA BE REALLY MAD. 907 01:15:13,176 --> 01:15:17,313 ONLY IF THEY FIND OUT, WHICH THEY WON'T BECAUSE YOU WON'T TELL ON ME. 908 01:15:17,313 --> 01:15:20,750 BECAUSE IF YOU DO, I'LL TELL THEM ABOUT YOU AND PENNY. DEAL ? 909 01:15:20,750 --> 01:15:22,619 DEAL. 910 01:15:30,259 --> 01:15:33,797 HE'S HYPER-NORMAL. HE'S CANINE, BUT HE'S SOME KIND OF HYBRID. 911 01:15:33,797 --> 01:15:36,332 HE'S SOME KIND OF MUTANT, YOU KNOW ? HE'S SOME KIND OF-- 912 01:15:36,332 --> 01:15:38,668 THAT'S IT ! I'M-I'M AWAKE, HUH ? 913 01:15:38,668 --> 01:15:42,706 G.S.A. ! GOVERNMENTAL SPECIES ALTERATION. 914 01:15:42,706 --> 01:15:46,576 THEY TAKE ALIEN BRAIN TISSUE, AND THEY PUT IT INTO ORDINARY HOUSEHOLD PETS. 915 01:15:46,576 --> 01:15:50,213 THAT DOG IS AN ALIEN ! HE'S CANINE, BUT HE'S NOT CANINE. 916 01:15:50,213 --> 01:15:52,582 HE'S ALIEN, BUT HE'S NOT ALIEN. 917 01:15:52,582 --> 01:15:55,251 HE'S SUPERINTELLIGENCE IN ONE GIANT, DUMB-LOOKING PACKAGE. 918 01:15:55,251 --> 01:15:57,353 THIS IS CLEVER STUFF, WILLIAM ! 919 01:15:57,353 --> 01:15:59,623 DUDE, MAN, ARE YOU OKAY ? 920 01:16:01,124 --> 01:16:04,594 I'M ALL RIGHT. I'M ALL RIGHT. AND-AND DO YOU KNOW WHY ? 921 01:16:04,594 --> 01:16:07,163 BECAUSE I JUST HACKED INTO THE COUNTRY'S MAIN CREDIT CARD NETWORK... 922 01:16:07,163 --> 01:16:10,867 AND I ASKED FOR THE LAST PLACE WHERE RICHARD NEWTON USED HIS CREDIT CARD ! 923 01:16:10,867 --> 01:16:15,138 THAT'S WHY I'M ALL RIGHT. "EARLY-ON-INN, EARLY-ON-INN." 924 01:16:15,138 --> 01:16:17,641 WE'RE GOING TO TRANK THE DISC AND GRAB THE DOG. 925 01:16:17,641 --> 01:16:19,609 NO, NO ! THAT WOULD BE WRONG. 926 01:16:19,609 --> 01:16:22,011 WE'RE GOING TO TRANK THE DOG AND GRAB THE DISC. 927 01:16:22,011 --> 01:16:24,914 YES, 'CAUSE THAT'S HOW IT GOES, AND THAT'S HOW IT ALWAYS GOES. 928 01:16:24,914 --> 01:16:28,885 THEN, GO ! I'M READY ! DRIVE ! DRIVE ! 929 01:16:28,885 --> 01:16:33,222 BEETHOVEN, I MISSED YOU SO MUCH. 930 01:16:36,860 --> 01:16:39,162 COME ON, BEETHOVEN. 931 01:17:41,224 --> 01:17:43,359 HERE WE ARE. OH, THANK YOU. 932 01:17:50,767 --> 01:17:55,438 PERSONAL ITEMS, HUH ? I THOUGHT IT WAS YOU. YOU DID ? 933 01:17:55,438 --> 01:17:59,843 I RECOGNIZED YOUR VOICE. YOU DID ? 934 01:17:59,843 --> 01:18:02,411 SO, HOW'S YOUR TRIP ? 935 01:18:02,411 --> 01:18:05,949 YOU FIRST. IT'S OKAY. YOURS ? 936 01:18:05,949 --> 01:18:09,052 IT'S GOOD NOW. 937 01:18:09,052 --> 01:18:11,821 SO-- SO-- 938 01:18:11,821 --> 01:18:16,125 YOU WANT TO TAKE A WALK ? COOL. 939 01:18:16,125 --> 01:18:18,227 NO WAY ! IT'S TRUE. 940 01:18:18,227 --> 01:18:21,731 BEETHOVEN WAS CHASING THEM, AND THEY JUST GOT SO SCARED... 941 01:18:21,731 --> 01:18:24,768 THEY SHOVED THEMSELVES INTO THAT LITTLE CAR AND PEELED OUT. 942 01:18:24,768 --> 01:18:26,870 THAT'S THE CRAZIEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD. 943 01:18:26,870 --> 01:18:29,873 BEETHOVEN'S LIKE THE COOLEST DOG I'VE EVER SEEN. 944 01:18:29,873 --> 01:18:32,809 WELL, NEXT TO PUDDLES. WHO'S PUDDLES ? 945 01:18:32,809 --> 01:18:35,745 MY DOG. WELL, MY DAD NAMED HIM PUDDLES... 946 01:18:35,745 --> 01:18:39,916 AFTER HE MADE A MESS IN MY DAD'S FAVORITE CHAIR RIGHT AFTER WE GOT HIM. 947 01:18:39,916 --> 01:18:44,320 I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN. BEETHOVEN'S MADE A LOT OF MESSES OUT OF THINGS ON MY TRIP. 948 01:18:44,320 --> 01:18:47,490 AT LEAST IT'S NOT BORING LIKE MY VACATION. 949 01:18:47,490 --> 01:18:51,160 WELL, ACTUALLY, THIS IS THE BEST TIME I'VE HAD ALL TRIP. 950 01:18:51,160 --> 01:18:54,397 ME TOO. 951 01:18:54,397 --> 01:18:57,400 SO, WHERE'S BEETHOVEN NOW ? HE'S IN THE RV. 952 01:18:57,400 --> 01:18:59,869 CAN WE GO VISIT HIM ? SURE. 953 01:18:59,869 --> 01:19:03,239 TOMMY, IT SAYS HERE, "BEVERAGE EXTREMELY HOT." 954 01:19:03,239 --> 01:19:05,942 OH, HOT, HOT, HOT. 955 01:19:14,984 --> 01:19:18,387 THEY FORGOT TO TURN THE ALARM ON. 956 01:19:18,387 --> 01:19:21,925 UH, GOOD, GOOD. 957 01:19:21,925 --> 01:19:25,428 ONE MORE SIP. 958 01:19:36,873 --> 01:19:40,343 - WHAT IF IT'S A TRAP ? - LISTEN TO ME ! 959 01:19:40,343 --> 01:19:43,112 ON THE COUNT OF THREE, WE OPEN THE DOOR AND TRANK THE DOG. 960 01:19:43,112 --> 01:19:46,215 OHHH. 961 01:19:46,215 --> 01:19:49,853 NO, NO, IT WON'T HURT HIM. HE'LL JUST GO SLEEPY-SLEEPY. 962 01:19:49,853 --> 01:19:52,555 - OH. OH. - BEGIN THE COUNTDOWN. 963 01:19:52,555 --> 01:19:55,524 WHAT ? 964 01:19:55,524 --> 01:19:58,127 TEN, NINE, 965 01:19:58,127 --> 01:20:01,230 EIGHT, SEVEN-- THREE, TWO, ONE ! 966 01:20:01,230 --> 01:20:04,300 EIGHT, SEVEN-- 967 01:20:06,836 --> 01:20:09,372 WHERE IS THE COFFEE ? 968 01:20:19,115 --> 01:20:20,984 DID YOU HEAR THAT ? 969 01:20:20,984 --> 01:20:23,086 HEAR WHAT ? 970 01:20:23,086 --> 01:20:25,154 THE DOG GROWLING. 971 01:20:25,154 --> 01:20:28,224 UH, YES. 972 01:20:28,224 --> 01:20:32,095 WHY DID YOU SAY, "HEAR WHAT ?" WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST SAY, "YES, I HEARD THE DOG GROWLING" ? 973 01:20:32,095 --> 01:20:35,364 BECAUSE, WELL, THERE IS NO DOG. 974 01:20:35,364 --> 01:20:39,535 FOCUS. IT'S JUST THE MOTOR HOME SETTLING. 975 01:20:39,535 --> 01:20:44,507 -OKAY, OKAY, LET'S GET MOVING. -WHAT? LET'S JUST GET THE DVD AND GO. 976 01:20:44,507 --> 01:20:47,043 WE ARE ! EXCEPT THIS TIME NO MISTAKES. 977 01:20:47,043 --> 01:20:49,445 THIS TIME WE'RE TAKING THE WHOLE MOTOR HOME. 978 01:20:52,115 --> 01:20:54,150 HEY, LOOK, IT'S THE RV. 979 01:20:54,150 --> 01:20:57,420 HEY, DAD ! WAIT A MINUTE. 980 01:20:57,420 --> 01:20:59,889 THAT ISN'T MY DAD. SOMEBODY'S STEALING THE RV ! 981 01:20:59,889 --> 01:21:02,391 YEAH, HI. IS THIS CLUB CANINE ? 982 01:21:02,391 --> 01:21:06,295 YES, WE HAVE A DOG WE NEED PICKED UP AND KENNELED FOR A FEW DAYS. 983 01:21:06,295 --> 01:21:09,565 YES, I'LL HOLD. HONEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING ? 984 01:21:09,565 --> 01:21:13,436 GEORGE AND ALICE CAN HAVE HIM SHIPPED WHEN THEY GET TO THE REUNION. 985 01:21:13,436 --> 01:21:15,538 I'M SORRY. I SHOULD'VE DONE THIS A THOUSAND MILES AGO. 986 01:21:15,538 --> 01:21:17,907 I DON'T WANT YOU TO HAVE A BAD TRIP. 987 01:21:17,907 --> 01:21:22,578 HE'S GONNA BE OKAY. IT SAYS HERE THAT CLUB CANINE HAS A FOUR-BISCUIT RATING. 988 01:21:22,578 --> 01:21:26,449 - DIDN'T WE TRY THIS ALREADY ? - YEAH, BUT THIS TIME HE'S GONNA STAY. 989 01:21:26,449 --> 01:21:30,053 YEAH. HE'S 185 POUNDS. 990 01:21:30,053 --> 01:21:32,155 NO, I'M NOT KIDDING. 991 01:21:32,155 --> 01:21:34,157 HOLD ON A SECOND. 992 01:21:37,560 --> 01:21:40,263 BRENNAN, WHAT'S GOING-- OH, HELLO. 993 01:21:40,263 --> 01:21:42,531 DAD, SOMEONE JUST STOLE THE RV ! 994 01:21:42,531 --> 01:21:45,368 - WHAT ? - SARA WAS IN IT ! 995 01:21:45,368 --> 01:21:48,337 SHE SAID THAT BEETHOVEN WAS LONELY, SO SHE WENT TO KEEP HIM COMPANY. 996 01:21:48,337 --> 01:21:50,974 I SHOULD'VE TOLD YOU, DAD. I'M SORRY. 997 01:21:50,974 --> 01:21:53,709 WHAT ? 998 01:21:53,709 --> 01:21:57,346 - RICHARD ! - I FOUND IT ! 999 01:21:57,346 --> 01:22:00,716 WHO TOLD YOU WE'D GET IT ? YOU DID, TOMMY. 1000 01:22:00,716 --> 01:22:03,719 WHO'S THE MAN ? YOU ARE, TOMMY. 1001 01:22:03,719 --> 01:22:06,122 SHHH. BEETHOVEN. 1002 01:22:06,122 --> 01:22:08,357 MAYBE THEY WON'T KNOW WE'RE HERE. 1003 01:22:08,357 --> 01:22:11,460 GO CHECK IT OUT. 1004 01:22:11,460 --> 01:22:14,063 I DON'T WANT TO. CHECK IT OUT ! GO ! 1005 01:22:23,506 --> 01:22:25,975 DID YOU FIND ANYTHING USEFUL ? 1006 01:22:25,975 --> 01:22:29,045 SEVENTY-THREE EMPTY COFFEE CUPS IN THE CAR. THE CAR'S A HUNK OF JUNK. 1007 01:22:29,045 --> 01:22:32,248 WELL, WE KNOW THAT. WHO ARE THEY ? WHAT DO THEY WANT ? 1008 01:22:32,248 --> 01:22:35,151 WHO'S CHASING THEM DOWN TO GET MY LITTLE GIRL BACK ? CALM DOWN, MR. NEWTON. 1009 01:22:35,151 --> 01:22:38,387 WE'VE GOT EVERY UNIT IN THE AREA LOOKING FOR 'EM. 1010 01:22:38,387 --> 01:22:40,723 WE DON'T EVEN KNOW IF YOUR DAUGHTER'S IN THE MOTOR HOME. 1011 01:22:40,723 --> 01:22:45,128 I JUST TOLD YOU SO ! MR. NEWTON, WE'RE DOING EVERYTHING WE CAN. 1012 01:22:49,732 --> 01:22:52,435 - NO, YOU'RE NOT ! 1013 01:22:52,435 --> 01:22:57,506 HEY ! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ? WHAT ARE YOU DOING ? 1014 01:22:57,506 --> 01:23:00,743 I'M GOING AFTER MY LITTLE GIRL. HANG ON ! 1015 01:23:00,743 --> 01:23:03,712 GO, DAD ! YEAH ! 1016 01:23:21,364 --> 01:23:23,666 BE A MAN, WILLIAM ! 1017 01:23:30,573 --> 01:23:33,576 DOGGIE NIGHT-NIGHT TIME. 1018 01:23:44,587 --> 01:23:48,491 OH, MY GOD ! WE'RE KIDNAPPERS. 1019 01:23:48,491 --> 01:23:53,529 TOMMY, YOU NEVER SAID NOTHING ABOUT US BEING KIDNAPPERS ! 1020 01:23:53,529 --> 01:23:55,631 SHUT UP. YOU'RE BABBLING. 1021 01:23:55,631 --> 01:23:58,301 STOP BABBLING AND LET ME THINK. THINK ABOUT WHAT ? 1022 01:23:58,301 --> 01:24:02,571 WE ARE GOING TO JAIL ! PANICKING IS NOT ALLOWED ! 1023 01:24:02,571 --> 01:24:05,841 TOMMY, YOU SAID NOBODY WAS GONNA GET HURT ! 1024 01:24:05,841 --> 01:24:08,377 WELL, NO ONE HAS BEEN HURT, SO SHUT UP ! 1025 01:24:08,377 --> 01:24:11,080 - NO, NO, YOU SHUT UP ! - NO, YOU SHUT UP ! 1026 01:24:11,080 --> 01:24:13,116 - YOU SHUT UP ! - NO, YOU SHUT UP ! 1027 01:24:13,116 --> 01:24:15,618 - YOU SHUT UP ! - YOU FIRST ! YOU SHUT UP ! 1028 01:24:15,618 --> 01:24:17,653 LA-LA-LA, CAN'T HEAR YOU. CAN'T LISTEN TO YOU. 1029 01:24:20,356 --> 01:24:23,392 YOU KNOW, YOU'RE GONNA GET IN A LOT OF TROUBLE FOR THIS. 1030 01:24:23,392 --> 01:24:27,230 - YEAH. - OKAY, MIGHT AS WELL GO CODE THREE. 1031 01:24:31,834 --> 01:24:33,802 GO AHEAD, FLOOR IT. 1032 01:24:39,275 --> 01:24:44,280 STOP THIS, OR I'M TELLING YOUR MOM ! 1033 01:24:44,280 --> 01:24:47,216 STOP IT NOW ! 1034 01:24:51,654 --> 01:24:57,160 I'M GONNA... BE TAKING... A NICE LITTLE NAP. 1035 01:25:03,432 --> 01:25:07,203 WHEN WE CATCH UP, ARE YOU GONNA SHOOT OUT THE TIRES OR SOMETHING ? 1036 01:25:07,203 --> 01:25:09,538 YOU WATCH TOO MUCH TELEVISION. WE CAN'T RISK HURTING THE GIRL. 1037 01:25:09,538 --> 01:25:11,674 WHAT SHOULD I DO ? 1038 01:25:11,674 --> 01:25:13,509 GET UP AHEAD OF 'EM AND SLAM ON THE BRAKES. 1039 01:25:13,509 --> 01:25:15,378 WHAT ? 1040 01:25:18,914 --> 01:25:22,385 STOP ! YOU'RE GOING TOO FAST ! YOU'RE GONNA CRASH US ! 1041 01:25:22,385 --> 01:25:25,188 YOU SHOULD'VE THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORE YOU TRIED TO STOW AWAY. 1042 01:25:25,188 --> 01:25:28,424 AND BEFORE YOU TRIED TO STEAL THE OPERATING SYSTEM FROM ME, LITTLE GIRL ! 1043 01:25:35,864 --> 01:25:41,237 OR SHOULD I SAY... "SECRET AGENT" ? 1044 01:25:41,237 --> 01:25:44,607 - BEETHOVEN, HE'S CRAZY ! 1045 01:25:49,645 --> 01:25:51,747 WILLIAM ! WILL-- 1046 01:25:54,450 --> 01:25:56,952 - AH. TORO ! 1047 01:25:56,952 --> 01:25:59,955 TORO, COME ON. COME ON. COME ON. YOU WANT SOME OF THIS. 1048 01:25:59,955 --> 01:26:02,958 - GO GET HIM, BEETHOVEN ! 1049 01:26:02,958 --> 01:26:05,628 COME ON ! 1050 01:26:05,628 --> 01:26:09,365 STOP IT ! HE'S HOT ! YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME ? 1051 01:26:09,365 --> 01:26:12,935 WILLIAM, GET OUT HERE ! 1052 01:26:12,935 --> 01:26:16,405 GOD, WE'RE MOVING. WILLIAM ! 1053 01:26:16,405 --> 01:26:19,408 WE'RE GONNA CRASH ! 1054 01:26:19,408 --> 01:26:22,745 GET-- STAY DOWN ! 1055 01:26:22,745 --> 01:26:25,681 BEETHOVEN, GET UP ! 1056 01:26:32,621 --> 01:26:34,857 - BEETHOVEN ! 1057 01:26:47,236 --> 01:26:51,874 BEETHOVEN, PLEASE... SIT ! 1058 01:26:51,874 --> 01:26:55,411 NO ! NO ! STAND ! NO ! 1059 01:26:55,411 --> 01:26:57,880 - OH, MY GOD ! 1060 01:26:57,880 --> 01:27:00,316 NO, DON'T SIT ! 1061 01:27:00,316 --> 01:27:02,017 - GOOD BOY ! 1062 01:27:02,017 --> 01:27:05,488 - WHOA ! 1063 01:27:25,007 --> 01:27:27,910 - SARA ! - DADDY ! 1064 01:27:30,879 --> 01:27:33,716 DADDY ! DADDY ! 1065 01:27:44,059 --> 01:27:47,296 HONEY, I'M SO SORRY WE DIDN'T BELIEVE YOU. 1066 01:27:47,296 --> 01:27:50,466 BEETHOVEN SAVED ME, DADDY. YES, HE DID. HE DID. 1067 01:27:56,405 --> 01:27:59,542 HEY, SHE'S OKAY. 1068 01:27:59,542 --> 01:28:02,911 BEETHOVEN, I WAS WRONG ABOUT YOU. 1069 01:28:04,747 --> 01:28:07,416 YOU ARE A HERO. 1070 01:28:07,416 --> 01:28:09,818 OH, HONEY, I LOVE YOU. 1071 01:28:11,320 --> 01:28:13,856 HANG AROUND. YOU'RE UNDER ARREST. 1072 01:28:13,856 --> 01:28:18,727 I WANT A LARGE BLACK COFFEE... 1073 01:28:18,727 --> 01:28:20,963 AND TWO SUGARS. 1074 01:28:20,963 --> 01:28:25,468 AND CAN YOU MAKE IT FAST ? 1075 01:28:25,468 --> 01:28:29,372 YOU WILL NOT ARREST ME. YOU WILL GIVE US ONLY A PARKING TICKET. 1076 01:28:29,372 --> 01:28:32,508 YOU ARE GETTING SLEEPY. LOCK HIM UP, TIGHT. 1077 01:28:32,508 --> 01:28:36,011 SLEEPY. YOU ARE SLEEPY. YOU ARE ALL SLEEPY. 1078 01:28:36,011 --> 01:28:38,747 WATCH YOUR HEAD. 1079 01:28:38,747 --> 01:28:41,750 WHAT DID THEY WANT WITH US ? 1080 01:28:41,750 --> 01:28:44,987 THIS. IT'S GOT A STOLEN COMPUTER CODE ON IT. 1081 01:28:44,987 --> 01:28:47,490 IT'S A SHAME. THIS WAS A GOOD MOVIE. 1082 01:28:47,490 --> 01:28:49,758 DON KNOTTS GAVE THE PERFORMANCE OF HIS CAREER. 1083 01:28:49,758 --> 01:28:52,361 YOU KNOW HE PUT ON WEIGHT FOR THAT ROLE ? HE DID ? 1084 01:28:52,361 --> 01:28:54,763 I SAW IT ONCE AT A DRIVE-IN WHEN I WAS A KID. 1085 01:28:54,763 --> 01:28:57,800 MY DAD TOOK US ACROSS COUNTRY IN AN RV ONCE. 1086 01:28:57,800 --> 01:29:01,103 NOT AS NICE AS YOUR DAD'S RIG, THOUGH. 1087 01:29:02,571 --> 01:29:04,773 MR. NEWTON... 1088 01:29:04,773 --> 01:29:08,511 YOU THINK YOU CAN AVOID BORROWING ANY MORE SQUAD CARS ? 1089 01:29:11,046 --> 01:29:14,717 - I THINK SO. - HAVE A NICE TRIP. 1090 01:29:14,717 --> 01:29:17,586 THANK YOU, SIR. 1091 01:29:17,586 --> 01:29:20,789 OKAY, COME ON, GUYS. LET'S GO. 1092 01:29:20,789 --> 01:29:22,891 WE'RE ALMOST THERE. 1093 01:30:41,537 --> 01:30:46,509 COME ON, GUYS, CHEER UP. AT LEAST WE GOT TO SPEND TWO WEEKS WITH BEETHOVEN. 1094 01:30:46,509 --> 01:30:50,746 IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE NEVER GONNA SEE HIM AGAIN. 1095 01:30:50,746 --> 01:30:54,082 HEY, THIS WILL GIVE US A GOOD EXCUSE TO VISIT UNCLE GEORGE AND AUNT ALICE. 1096 01:30:54,082 --> 01:30:55,984 RIGHT ? THROW IT ! 1097 01:31:02,525 --> 01:31:05,728 I DIDN'T BUY IT, EITHER. OKAY, LET'S FIND GEORGE AND ALICE AND GET THIS OVER WITH. 1098 01:31:05,728 --> 01:31:07,663 COME ON, HONEY. 1099 01:31:14,503 --> 01:31:18,874 RICHARD ! RICHARD ! BETH, HEY ! 1100 01:31:18,874 --> 01:31:22,144 UNCLE MORRIE ! HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY. 1101 01:31:22,144 --> 01:31:24,680 AH, YOU LOOK GOOD. YOU LOOK GOOD, RICHARD. HEY, YOU TOO. 1102 01:31:24,680 --> 01:31:27,249 HEY, WEAR THIS. GIVE ME A LITTLE HUG THERE. 1103 01:31:27,249 --> 01:31:30,218 AHHH. AND THE KIDS-- LOOK AT THE KIDS. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. 1104 01:31:30,218 --> 01:31:34,056 FIVE YEARS, AND LOOK AT YOU GUYS. YOU'RE ALL GROWN UP. 1105 01:31:34,056 --> 01:31:36,525 HEY, HAVE GEORGE AND ALICE AND THE KIDS ARRIVED YET ? 1106 01:31:36,525 --> 01:31:38,661 OH, I GOTTA TELL YOU ABOUT THAT. 1107 01:31:38,661 --> 01:31:42,197 GEORGIE CALLED AND SAID HE'S NO GONNA BE ABLE TO MAKE IT TO THE REUNION. 1108 01:31:42,197 --> 01:31:45,267 - THEY'RE NOT COMING ? - NO. THEY HAD A PROBLEM IN "BRATISLOBA." 1109 01:31:45,267 --> 01:31:47,570 SOMEWHERE. BUSINESS-WISE. 1110 01:31:47,570 --> 01:31:51,139 AND THEY'RE GONNA HAVE TO EXTEND THEIR VISIT FOR AT LEAST ANOTHER YEAR. 1111 01:31:51,139 --> 01:31:53,208 WHAT ? 1112 01:31:53,208 --> 01:31:56,912 AND SO HE ASKED ME TO ASK YOU IF YOU WOULDN'T MIND... 1113 01:31:56,912 --> 01:32:00,115 TAKING CARE OF THE DOG UNTIL THEY GET BACK. 1114 01:32:00,115 --> 01:32:02,851 HE SAID HE'D PAY FOR EVERYTHING. 1115 01:32:02,851 --> 01:32:05,554 GEORGE ? MY BROTHER SAID THIS ? 1116 01:32:05,554 --> 01:32:07,623 SAID HE'D PAY FOR EVERYTHING. 1117 01:32:07,623 --> 01:32:09,925 WE'D BE HAPPY TO TAKE CARE OF BEETHOVEN. 1118 01:32:09,925 --> 01:32:12,828 GOOD. HAPPY TO HEAR YOU SAY THAT. UH, SOMETHING ELSE. 1119 01:32:12,828 --> 01:32:17,232 YOU REMEMBER YOUR COUSINS, UH, TED AND SALLY ? 1120 01:32:17,232 --> 01:32:20,068 SURE. THEY LIVE AN HOUR AWAY FROM US IN COLORADO SPRINGS. 1121 01:32:20,068 --> 01:32:23,972 THEY HAD TO LEAVE IN A BIG HURRY. I MEAN, THE HOT DOGS WEREN'T-- 1122 01:32:23,972 --> 01:32:27,843 - REALLY ? - ANYWAY, SINCE YOU'RE GOING TO BE PASSING THEIR HOUSE, 1123 01:32:27,843 --> 01:32:30,579 THEY THOUGHT MAYBE YOU COULD DROP SOMETHING OFF FOR THEM. 1124 01:32:30,579 --> 01:32:33,115 SURE WE CAN. WAIT. WHAT IS IT ? 1125 01:32:33,115 --> 01:32:37,185 TINY ! BARON ! 1126 01:32:38,821 --> 01:32:40,789 COOL ! 1127 01:32:47,663 --> 01:32:50,599 NO. NO, NO. NO, NO, NO. 1128 01:32:50,599 --> 01:32:53,969 IT'S OKAY. IT'LL BE GREAT FOR YOU. 1129 01:32:53,969 --> 01:32:55,971 YOU'RE DOING GREAT. NO, I'M NOT. 1130 01:32:55,971 --> 01:32:58,273 * ON THE ROAD AGAIN 1131 01:32:58,273 --> 01:33:02,745 * JUST CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 1132 01:33:02,745 --> 01:33:06,214 * I FOUND LOVE IS MAKING MUSIC WITH MY FRIENDS * 1133 01:33:06,214 --> 01:33:10,285 * AND I CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 1134 01:33:10,285 --> 01:33:13,255 * ON THE ROAD AGAIN 1135 01:33:13,255 --> 01:33:17,726 * GOING PLACES THAT I'VE NEVER BEEN * 1136 01:33:17,726 --> 01:33:21,296 * SEEING THINGS THAT I MAY NEVER SEE AGAIN * 1137 01:33:21,296 --> 01:33:25,668 * AND I CAN'T WAIT TO GET ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 1138 01:33:25,668 --> 01:33:29,738 * ON THE ROAD AGAIN LIKE A BAND OF GYPSIES... * 1139 01:33:29,738 --> 01:33:34,042 YOU LIVE IN DENVER ? YOU'RE KIDDING ? WHAT SCHOOL DO YOU GO TO ? 1140 01:33:34,042 --> 01:33:38,046 RIDGECREST HIGH. YOU TOO ? NO WAY. REALLY ? 1141 01:33:38,046 --> 01:33:42,284 * AND OUR WAY IS ON THE ROAD AGAIN * 1142 01:33:42,284 --> 01:33:45,153 IS YOUR LITTLE SISTER VIDEOTAPING US ? 1143 01:33:45,153 --> 01:33:48,924 - SARA ! - I GOTTA DOCUMENT EVERYTHING ! 1144 01:33:48,924 --> 01:33:51,927 * I FOUND LOVE IS MAKING MUSIC WITH MY FRIENDS... * 1145 01:33:51,927 --> 01:33:55,831 BEETHOVEN, NOT THE TOILET ! 1146 01:34:11,013 --> 01:34:12,881 SARA ! 1147 01:34:19,321 --> 01:34:21,256 GET AWAY, SARA ! 1148 01:34:25,794 --> 01:34:28,363 * ON THE ROAD AGAIN... 1149 01:34:28,363 --> 01:34:31,399 HERE, BRENNAN. YEAH, LIKE THIS. 1150 01:34:31,399 --> 01:34:33,969 WAIT A MINUTE. DON'T BREAK THINGS. STOP. 1151 01:34:35,971 --> 01:34:38,006 WAIT A MINUTE. OH, MY GOD. 1152 01:34:42,878 --> 01:34:45,814 HOW COME EVERYBODY'S HITTING ME ? 1153 01:34:45,814 --> 01:34:48,283 BEETHOVEN, HELP ME ! 1154 01:34:48,283 --> 01:34:51,253 HELP ME ! 1155 01:34:51,253 --> 01:34:54,990 I'M RECORDING THIS. 1156 01:34:54,990 --> 01:34:58,193 HONEY, THIS IS GREAT. I'M SO PROUD OF YOU. 1157 01:34:58,193 --> 01:35:01,129 I'M NOT CLEANING THIS UP ! YOU BETTER CONTROL YOURSELVES! 92003

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