Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,068 --> 00:00:04,068
Hey, hey.
2
00:00:04,102 --> 00:00:05,736
I'm not here for your entertainment.
3
00:00:05,770 --> 00:00:06,670
I'm a foot.
4
00:00:06,705 --> 00:00:08,705
Leave me alone.
5
00:00:08,740 --> 00:00:10,407
Oh, foot.
6
00:00:10,441 --> 00:00:12,442
[Knock on door]
7
00:00:12,476 --> 00:00:13,710
Hey, Carly.
8
00:00:13,744 --> 00:00:14,410
Oh, hey.
9
00:00:14,444 --> 00:00:15,144
Is Sam here?
10
00:00:15,178 --> 00:00:19,382
No, why?
11
00:00:19,416 --> 00:00:21,129
'Cause I pulled a prank on her.
12
00:00:21,163 --> 00:00:22,362
You pulled a prank on Sam?
13
00:00:22,396 --> 00:00:22,963
Uh-huh.
14
00:00:22,997 --> 00:00:25,150
What, are you tired of living?
15
00:00:25,184 --> 00:00:26,736
Why would you mess with Sam?
16
00:00:26,771 --> 00:00:28,716
Because she put a dead
fish in my locker.
17
00:00:28,750 --> 00:00:29,737
Smell this.
18
00:00:29,772 --> 00:00:30,691
No. Gross.
19
00:00:30,725 --> 00:00:33,677
I don't wanna smell
your fishy backpack.
20
00:00:33,712 --> 00:00:35,645
What prank did you play on Sam?
21
00:00:35,646 --> 00:00:36,696
Open the door.
22
00:00:36,730 --> 00:00:38,146
Call the police.
23
00:00:38,181 --> 00:00:39,409
Open this door.
24
00:00:39,444 --> 00:00:40,277
Leave me alone, Sam.
25
00:00:40,311 --> 00:00:42,815
We're even.
26
00:00:42,849 --> 00:00:45,069
Come here, Benson.
27
00:00:45,104 --> 00:00:46,520
You handcuffed her to Gibby?
28
00:00:46,555 --> 00:00:48,228
She put a dead fish in my locker.
29
00:00:48,263 --> 00:00:51,114
Gibby's way worse than a dead fish.
30
00:00:51,148 --> 00:00:55,585
My mom thinks I'm awesome.
31
00:00:55,619 --> 00:00:56,452
Just give me the key.
32
00:00:56,493 --> 00:00:57,226
Give her the key.
33
00:00:57,261 --> 00:00:59,979
Only if she promises-- [Screams]
34
00:01:00,013 --> 00:01:01,560
No, Sam. Don't, don't.
35
00:01:01,595 --> 00:01:02,194
Go away. Go away.
36
00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:03,707
No, no, no.
37
00:01:03,742 --> 00:01:08,033
Carly, call the police.
38
00:01:08,067 --> 00:01:10,683
Freddie-- somebody help me.
39
00:01:10,717 --> 00:01:12,223
Oh, my arm.
40
00:01:12,257 --> 00:01:13,161
Where's the key?
41
00:01:13,196 --> 00:01:15,205
In my front pants pocket, left side.
42
00:01:18,118 --> 00:01:20,062
Eww, no.
43
00:01:20,097 --> 00:01:21,904
Just let me up and
I'll give you the key.
44
00:01:21,939 --> 00:01:25,520
Please.
45
00:01:25,554 --> 00:01:32,586
Now, unlock me.
46
00:01:32,620 --> 00:01:37,944
Like Gibby's therapist didn't
have enough to deal with.
47
00:01:37,978 --> 00:01:40,084
Come on, you put a dead
fish in my locker.
48
00:01:40,119 --> 00:01:40,988
I handcuffed you to Gibby.
49
00:01:41,023 --> 00:01:41,692
We're even.
50
00:01:41,727 --> 00:01:44,434
Yay. Who wants lemonade?
51
00:01:44,468 --> 00:01:48,415
I don't play to get even.
52
00:01:48,450 --> 00:01:54,303
Mama plays to win.
53
00:01:54,337 --> 00:01:57,413
I'm gonna get you.
54
00:01:57,448 --> 00:02:05,139
Maybe not today, maybe not
tomorrow, but I'm gonna get you.
55
00:02:05,173 --> 00:02:07,849
I'm not scared.
56
00:02:07,883 --> 00:02:10,338
Really?
57
00:02:15,372 --> 00:02:16,441
Are you gonna throw up in it?
58
00:02:16,475 --> 00:02:19,483
Uh-huh.
59
00:02:19,518 --> 00:02:23,429
In five, four, three, two.
60
00:02:23,430 --> 00:02:25,937
[Music]
61
00:02:25,972 --> 00:02:28,110
I know you see
62
00:02:28,145 --> 00:02:29,047
somehow the world
63
00:02:29,081 --> 00:02:30,351
will change for me
64
00:02:30,385 --> 00:02:34,933
and be so wonderful
65
00:02:34,967 --> 00:02:37,305
live life, breathe air
66
00:02:37,339 --> 00:02:38,307
I know somehow
67
00:02:38,342 --> 00:02:39,711
we're gonna get there
68
00:02:39,745 --> 00:02:44,523
and feel so wonderful
69
00:02:44,558 --> 00:02:48,201
it's all for real
70
00:02:48,236 --> 00:02:48,971
I'm telling you
71
00:02:49,005 --> 00:02:50,240
just how I feel
72
00:02:50,275 --> 00:02:52,379
so, wake up the members
73
00:02:52,413 --> 00:02:54,317
of my nation
74
00:02:54,352 --> 00:02:56,022
it's your time to be
75
00:02:56,057 --> 00:02:56,858
there's no chance
76
00:02:56,893 --> 00:02:58,863
unless you take one
77
00:02:58,898 --> 00:03:00,500
every time you see
78
00:03:00,534 --> 00:03:01,703
the brighter side
79
00:03:01,737 --> 00:03:04,743
of every situation
80
00:03:04,778 --> 00:03:06,382
something's are meant to be
81
00:03:06,416 --> 00:03:07,584
so give me your best
82
00:03:07,619 --> 00:03:10,224
and leave the rest to me
83
00:03:29,439 --> 00:03:30,841
Spencer hikes the ball.
84
00:03:30,875 --> 00:03:34,182
He looks, he sees-- Spencer
Shay is handsome and open,
85
00:03:34,216 --> 00:03:37,189
pressure, laterals, touchdown!
86
00:03:37,223 --> 00:03:37,723
We're back.
87
00:03:37,757 --> 00:03:38,458
S'up, Spence.
88
00:03:38,492 --> 00:03:41,164
[Screams]
89
00:03:41,199 --> 00:03:41,900
Hey.
90
00:03:41,934 --> 00:03:43,136
Where have you guys been?
91
00:03:43,170 --> 00:03:44,171
A movie.
92
00:03:44,206 --> 00:03:46,442
We saw "the first kiss."
93
00:03:46,477 --> 00:03:47,210
Eww. How was it?
94
00:03:47,245 --> 00:03:50,217
Same as every other stupid
teen chick movie ever made.
95
00:03:50,251 --> 00:03:53,390
It made me embarrassed
to be a teen chick.
96
00:03:53,424 --> 00:03:55,027
So what up with that thing?
97
00:03:55,062 --> 00:03:56,965
He wants to be a professional
football player.
98
00:03:56,999 --> 00:03:57,967
Hey, come on.
99
00:03:58,001 --> 00:03:58,936
It could happen.
100
00:03:58,970 --> 00:04:00,906
Sure, if all the other
professional football players
101
00:04:00,941 --> 00:04:03,011
are eaten by lions.
102
00:04:03,045 --> 00:04:04,813
Uh, wrong.
103
00:04:04,848 --> 00:04:06,551
The Seattle cobras are
holding open tryouts
104
00:04:06,585 --> 00:04:09,889
for the first time ever
and I'm going for it.
105
00:04:09,923 --> 00:04:11,993
It's his dream that will never be.
106
00:04:12,028 --> 00:04:13,461
Oh, yeah?
107
00:04:13,495 --> 00:04:15,296
Hold this.
108
00:04:15,330 --> 00:04:16,763
What are you doing?
109
00:04:16,798 --> 00:04:18,163
Sam, you throw pretty hard, right?
110
00:04:18,198 --> 00:04:19,164
Yeah, I can throw.
111
00:04:19,198 --> 00:04:19,898
Good.
112
00:04:19,932 --> 00:04:22,666
I want you to throw me that
ball as hard as you can
113
00:04:22,700 --> 00:04:25,368
then I'm gonna run it all the
way back through that door
114
00:04:25,402 --> 00:04:27,703
and see if you guys can stop me.
115
00:04:27,737 --> 00:04:28,904
What's this gonna prove?
116
00:04:28,937 --> 00:04:30,871
We're ninth grade girls.
117
00:04:30,905 --> 00:04:37,608
Just throw the ball.
118
00:04:37,642 --> 00:04:38,508
Ahhh.
119
00:04:38,542 --> 00:04:39,141
Sorry.
120
00:04:39,176 --> 00:04:44,411
Are you okay?
121
00:04:44,446 --> 00:04:46,413
I'm fine.
122
00:04:46,447 --> 00:04:49,183
Just next time, if you can throw
the ball a little higher,
123
00:04:49,218 --> 00:04:54,555
that'll be great.
124
00:04:54,589 --> 00:04:56,356
Hey.
125
00:04:56,390 --> 00:04:58,091
What's the baseball bat for?
126
00:04:58,125 --> 00:05:02,328
Nothin'-- as long as Sam
keeps her distance.
127
00:05:02,362 --> 00:05:02,862
Relax.
128
00:05:02,896 --> 00:05:04,563
I'm too tired to get you back tonight.
129
00:05:04,597 --> 00:05:06,664
Good.
130
00:05:06,699 --> 00:05:09,267
So, how was "the first kiss"?
131
00:05:09,301 --> 00:05:10,334
Worst movie ever.
132
00:05:10,369 --> 00:05:11,636
I told you guys that movie
was gonna be awful.
133
00:05:11,670 --> 00:05:15,172
I mean, even the title,
"the first kiss."
134
00:05:15,207 --> 00:05:16,140
I know.
135
00:05:16,174 --> 00:05:18,109
So, who was yours?
136
00:05:18,143 --> 00:05:19,109
Who was my what?
137
00:05:19,144 --> 00:05:20,044
Your first kiss.
138
00:05:20,078 --> 00:05:21,178
Sam.
139
00:05:21,212 --> 00:05:24,013
Come on, we're all friends here.
140
00:05:24,048 --> 00:05:27,216
Well, two friends and a co-worker.
141
00:05:27,250 --> 00:05:30,319
Who was your first kiss?
142
00:05:30,353 --> 00:05:31,319
Okay.
143
00:05:31,354 --> 00:05:33,788
It was Ben Hoobsher.
144
00:05:33,822 --> 00:05:36,957
Nobody's last name is Hoobsher.
145
00:05:36,991 --> 00:05:39,059
Yes, it is.
146
00:05:39,093 --> 00:05:41,127
He kissed me under a kumquat
tree and his lips tasted
147
00:05:41,161 --> 00:05:44,430
like potato salad.
148
00:05:44,464 --> 00:05:45,397
Was it good?
149
00:05:45,431 --> 00:05:47,566
Hmm, just an average little kiss.
150
00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:49,735
No, the potato salad.
151
00:05:49,769 --> 00:05:50,936
Oh, yeah. Really good.
152
00:05:50,970 --> 00:05:52,371
Nice.
153
00:05:52,372 --> 00:05:56,073
My first kiss was with Buddy
Hinten at a Cuddlefist concert
154
00:05:56,107 --> 00:05:58,408
in a porta-potty.
155
00:05:58,442 --> 00:06:02,078
Hmm, so romantic.
156
00:06:02,112 --> 00:06:03,413
Whatever.
157
00:06:03,447 --> 00:06:06,949
All I know is, now, I can't stop
thinking about potato salad.
158
00:06:06,984 --> 00:06:08,751
Does that little market across
the street stay open late?
159
00:06:08,785 --> 00:06:09,685
Yeah, 'till 10.
160
00:06:09,720 --> 00:06:11,387
Does that skeevy guy still
hang around out front?
161
00:06:11,421 --> 00:06:13,121
Yeah.
162
00:06:13,156 --> 00:06:18,326
I'll be back.
163
00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:21,695
So, who was your first kiss?
164
00:06:21,729 --> 00:06:23,729
You don't need to know.
165
00:06:23,763 --> 00:06:30,965
I absolutely need to know.
166
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:35,035
Ah, I need money from other people.
167
00:06:35,069 --> 00:06:35,435
Okay.
168
00:06:35,470 --> 00:06:37,137
Then, just tell me her first name.
169
00:06:37,171 --> 00:06:40,573
Oh, is that a new ceiling?
170
00:06:40,608 --> 00:06:43,142
Who was your first kiss?
171
00:06:43,176 --> 00:06:44,844
I haven't had my first kiss.
172
00:06:44,878 --> 00:06:47,111
Oh, shut up.
173
00:06:47,145 --> 00:06:50,447
I've never kissed anyone.
174
00:06:50,481 --> 00:06:55,117
But what about that rotten girl
you dated last year, Valerie?
175
00:06:55,151 --> 00:06:56,118
You kissed her, right?
176
00:06:56,152 --> 00:06:57,152
No.
177
00:06:57,186 --> 00:06:59,954
Well, for like half a second at
school with a bunch of other kids
178
00:06:59,988 --> 00:07:00,755
hanging around.
179
00:07:00,789 --> 00:07:05,258
But, no, I've never had a real kiss.
180
00:07:05,259 --> 00:07:06,859
Oh.
181
00:07:10,596 --> 00:07:13,330
Well, I think it's kind of
sweet that you haven't kissed
182
00:07:13,365 --> 00:07:14,564
anyone yet.
183
00:07:14,599 --> 00:07:15,565
It's not sweet.
184
00:07:15,599 --> 00:07:16,765
It's lame.
185
00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:23,037
You've got to swear you won't
tell anyone-- especially Sam.
186
00:07:23,071 --> 00:07:24,671
[Music]
187
00:07:30,411 --> 00:07:30,910
Catch it.
188
00:07:30,944 --> 00:07:31,744
Catch it.
189
00:07:31,778 --> 00:07:32,411
Catch it.
190
00:07:32,446 --> 00:07:33,813
Yes. Now, run.
191
00:07:33,847 --> 00:07:34,847
Go. Run, run, run.
192
00:07:34,881 --> 00:07:35,547
Good. You got it.
193
00:07:35,582 --> 00:07:39,050
You got--oh, you fell down.
194
00:07:39,085 --> 00:07:41,486
Aren't you supposed to be
training for the cobra's tryouts?
195
00:07:41,487 --> 00:07:42,087
I am training.
196
00:07:42,121 --> 00:07:44,822
I'm watching football,
learning about football,
197
00:07:44,857 --> 00:07:47,592
snuggling a football.
198
00:07:47,626 --> 00:07:49,593
I knew you weren't gonna
take this seriously.
199
00:07:49,627 --> 00:07:51,194
I am, too, taking it seriously.
200
00:07:51,228 --> 00:07:54,830
I just can't get-- off your lazy butt?
201
00:07:54,864 --> 00:07:55,997
All right.
202
00:07:56,032 --> 00:07:56,898
There.
203
00:07:56,932 --> 00:08:00,935
Look, my butt's up and moving.
204
00:08:00,969 --> 00:08:03,137
Great, 'cause I'm
sure all professional
205
00:08:03,171 --> 00:08:04,037
football players do that.
206
00:08:04,072 --> 00:08:05,038
They would if they could.
207
00:08:05,073 --> 00:08:06,307
Oh, cramp.
208
00:08:06,341 --> 00:08:07,342
Oh, cramp.
209
00:08:07,376 --> 00:08:08,710
Oh, cramp.
210
00:08:08,744 --> 00:08:09,611
Cramp.
211
00:08:09,645 --> 00:08:11,245
Oh. Ow.
212
00:08:15,384 --> 00:08:15,616
Okay.
213
00:08:15,651 --> 00:08:18,886
Now that you're done doing
the butt-cramp dance,
214
00:08:18,920 --> 00:08:20,888
you need to exercise.
215
00:08:20,922 --> 00:08:23,189
Well, it's hard to exercise
when you don't have
216
00:08:23,224 --> 00:08:25,691
someone there to motivate you.
217
00:08:25,726 --> 00:08:27,493
Do you really wanna
be a Seattle cobra?
218
00:08:27,527 --> 00:08:28,794
Yes, with all my heart.
219
00:08:28,828 --> 00:08:29,828
Okay.
220
00:08:29,863 --> 00:08:31,196
Then I'm gonna motivate you.
221
00:08:31,230 --> 00:08:31,830
Huh.
222
00:08:31,864 --> 00:08:34,664
You're gonna start by
building up some muscle.
223
00:08:34,699 --> 00:08:35,832
I have muscles.
224
00:08:35,867 --> 00:08:37,100
Do you?
225
00:08:37,134 --> 00:08:38,067
Yes.
226
00:08:38,102 --> 00:08:40,536
Then, take off your shirt
and jump up and down.
227
00:08:40,570 --> 00:08:41,237
I don't want to.
228
00:08:41,271 --> 00:08:42,838
Why not?
229
00:08:42,872 --> 00:08:45,874
'Cause I'll jiggle.
230
00:08:45,908 --> 00:08:47,542
Then you need to build some muscle.
231
00:08:47,576 --> 00:08:48,409
How?
232
00:08:48,443 --> 00:08:50,844
Oh, I'll show you how.
233
00:08:50,878 --> 00:08:53,012
Aaaah!
234
00:08:53,047 --> 00:08:53,580
Come on.
235
00:08:53,614 --> 00:08:54,280
Aaaah!
236
00:08:54,315 --> 00:08:54,781
I'm going.
237
00:08:54,815 --> 00:08:55,615
Is that all you got?
238
00:08:55,649 --> 00:08:56,149
Aaaah!
239
00:08:56,183 --> 00:08:57,016
Be a man.
240
00:08:57,050 --> 00:08:57,517
Aaaah!
241
00:08:57,551 --> 00:08:58,484
You can do better than that.
242
00:08:58,518 --> 00:08:59,318
Aaaah!
243
00:08:59,352 --> 00:09:00,085
Stop jiggling.
244
00:09:00,119 --> 00:09:01,186
Aaaah!
245
00:09:01,221 --> 00:09:01,787
Come on.
246
00:09:01,821 --> 00:09:02,388
It burns.
247
00:09:02,422 --> 00:09:04,189
Hurry up.
248
00:09:04,224 --> 00:09:04,757
A hundred and ten percent.
249
00:09:04,791 --> 00:09:08,458
Oh, God.
250
00:09:08,492 --> 00:09:11,259
Oh, man, how long have I been running?
251
00:09:11,294 --> 00:09:14,793
A minute and 45 seconds.
252
00:09:14,827 --> 00:09:16,061
Keep going.
253
00:09:16,095 --> 00:09:18,929
It's so boring, just
going around in circles.
254
00:09:18,963 --> 00:09:20,864
Okay, then take me upstairs.
255
00:09:20,898 --> 00:09:21,631
What?
256
00:09:21,666 --> 00:09:23,800
You heard me. Upstairs!
257
00:09:23,834 --> 00:09:25,735
Okay.
258
00:09:25,769 --> 00:09:29,505
Ahhh! Ahhh!
259
00:09:29,539 --> 00:09:30,439
Quit complaining.
260
00:09:30,473 --> 00:09:32,140
Ahhh!
261
00:09:32,174 --> 00:09:32,807
Come on.
262
00:09:32,842 --> 00:09:34,008
Oh, this is impossible.
263
00:09:34,043 --> 00:09:34,943
Move it.
264
00:09:34,977 --> 00:09:36,511
Ahhh, what have you been eating?
265
00:09:36,545 --> 00:09:37,579
You can do it.
266
00:09:37,613 --> 00:09:39,147
Oh, my groin.
267
00:09:39,181 --> 00:09:43,199
[Screams]
268
00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:45,768
Okay. Next on iCarly--
please enjoy this preview
269
00:09:45,803 --> 00:09:55,374
of a new movie called-- Kelly Cooper.
270
00:09:55,409 --> 00:09:58,811
She just wanted to fit in
with the popular crowd.
271
00:09:58,846 --> 00:10:01,047
You wanna fit in with
the popular crowd?
272
00:10:01,081 --> 00:10:01,981
I do.
273
00:10:02,015 --> 00:10:03,315
Well, too bad.
274
00:10:03,349 --> 00:10:07,351
No!
275
00:10:07,386 --> 00:10:10,087
But Kelly had other ideas.
276
00:10:10,121 --> 00:10:18,394
She tried on a bunch of different
clothes and danced all around.
277
00:10:18,428 --> 00:10:20,028
[Music]
278
00:10:25,035 --> 00:10:26,970
Fell down a few times.
279
00:10:27,005 --> 00:10:28,839
[Screams]
280
00:10:28,873 --> 00:10:34,712
And somewhere along the way,
she met the guy of her dreams.
281
00:10:34,746 --> 00:10:36,546
I can't be your boyfriend.
282
00:10:36,581 --> 00:10:46,655
You can be whatever
you wanna be, Chad.
283
00:10:46,689 --> 00:10:49,424
[Screams]
284
00:10:49,458 --> 00:10:53,995
And now, Kelly's turning the
whole town upside down.
285
00:10:54,029 --> 00:10:58,029
Come on, everyone,
jump around with me.
286
00:11:06,073 --> 00:11:07,473
I can't believe this.
287
00:11:07,507 --> 00:11:09,641
I never lose.
288
00:11:09,676 --> 00:11:11,977
Guess you got your comeuppance.
289
00:11:12,011 --> 00:11:13,144
Sorry, Natalie.
290
00:11:13,179 --> 00:11:20,384
Or should I say, Nata-loser.
291
00:11:20,418 --> 00:11:24,054
A comedy that no one wants to see.
292
00:11:24,089 --> 00:11:27,290
"Kelly Cooper: Terrible movie."
293
00:11:27,325 --> 00:11:30,159
[Screams]
294
00:11:30,193 --> 00:11:32,027
[Applause]
295
00:11:32,062 --> 00:11:33,128
Oh, oh, please.
296
00:11:33,162 --> 00:11:34,196
Yeah, thank you so much.
297
00:11:34,230 --> 00:11:34,696
Thanks, really.
298
00:11:34,730 --> 00:11:37,632
It's definitely too much of us,
really-- okay, that wraps up
299
00:11:37,666 --> 00:11:38,833
iCarly for tonight, so.
300
00:11:38,867 --> 00:11:40,201
Ah, wait.
301
00:11:40,235 --> 00:11:41,802
Just one more little thing.
302
00:11:41,836 --> 00:11:42,569
What?
303
00:11:42,604 --> 00:11:45,105
You guys all know our
technical producer, Freddie.
304
00:11:45,140 --> 00:11:48,242
Show yourself to the people, Freddie.
305
00:11:48,276 --> 00:11:51,745
Hello.
306
00:11:51,779 --> 00:11:55,315
That was Freddie who last
week handcuffed me to a nerd.
307
00:11:55,349 --> 00:11:58,617
So now guess what?
308
00:11:58,652 --> 00:12:00,319
Freddie has never kissed a girl.
309
00:12:00,353 --> 00:12:02,354
Never. Not once.
310
00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:08,756
I heard him say so myself
and Carly is a witness.
311
00:12:08,790 --> 00:12:13,925
Okay. Later.
312
00:12:13,960 --> 00:12:16,393
Sam! Sam!
313
00:12:16,428 --> 00:12:18,608
You just ruined Freddie's life.
314
00:12:29,298 --> 00:12:30,331
I don't wanna be here.
315
00:12:30,365 --> 00:12:31,531
Come on.
316
00:12:31,565 --> 00:12:32,799
Come on.
317
00:12:32,833 --> 00:12:42,540
I don't wanna--I don't--I--
I don't wanna be here.
318
00:12:42,574 --> 00:12:44,174
You can't ditch school.
319
00:12:44,209 --> 00:12:45,442
Everyone's gonna make fun of me.
320
00:12:45,476 --> 00:12:47,811
You're being way too
dramatic about this.
321
00:12:47,845 --> 00:12:58,156
Now, come on, take off
that insane disguise.
322
00:12:58,190 --> 00:12:59,790
See, no one's laughing.
323
00:12:59,825 --> 00:13:04,330
I told you, you're being way too
dramatic-- hey, it's Benson.
324
00:13:04,364 --> 00:13:09,468
[Makes kissing noise]
325
00:13:09,503 --> 00:13:12,204
Give me my afro.
326
00:13:12,238 --> 00:13:13,372
No.
327
00:13:13,406 --> 00:13:15,640
Just 'cause a few rude guys
made kissy noises at you
328
00:13:15,674 --> 00:13:16,974
is no reason-- Freddie.
329
00:13:17,008 --> 00:13:20,643
Freddie, I don't mean to be rude
but I hear you've never kissed
330
00:13:20,677 --> 00:13:23,842
a girl.
331
00:13:23,877 --> 00:13:27,512
Well, thanks for stopping by.
332
00:13:27,546 --> 00:13:31,949
The important thing is
to be proud of yourself.
333
00:13:31,983 --> 00:13:36,254
You need to face the world
with shoulders cocked and say,
334
00:13:36,288 --> 00:13:40,925
"I am Freddie Benson, and I
have never kissed a girl."
335
00:13:40,960 --> 00:13:42,927
[Laughter]
336
00:13:42,961 --> 00:13:46,396
Hey there. Stop that.
337
00:13:46,431 --> 00:13:47,164
Stop laughing.
338
00:13:47,198 --> 00:13:52,168
At this unfortunate misfit.
339
00:13:52,203 --> 00:13:53,003
Okay.
340
00:13:53,037 --> 00:14:05,812
So far, things aren't going that
well, but-- can I go home now?
341
00:14:05,846 --> 00:14:10,816
I would.
342
00:14:10,851 --> 00:14:12,451
[Music]
343
00:14:17,457 --> 00:14:22,093
[Knocking]
344
00:14:22,127 --> 00:14:23,394
Hey.
345
00:14:23,428 --> 00:14:24,295
Hello, Gibby.
346
00:14:24,329 --> 00:14:25,830
Carly's not home from school yet.
347
00:14:25,864 --> 00:14:26,497
I know.
348
00:14:26,531 --> 00:14:27,565
She sent me here.
349
00:14:27,599 --> 00:14:28,866
Carly sent you here?
350
00:14:28,901 --> 00:14:30,201
Yeah.
351
00:14:30,235 --> 00:14:32,102
She was supposed to help
you train this afternoon
352
00:14:32,136 --> 00:14:33,636
for your football tryouts, right?
353
00:14:33,670 --> 00:14:34,337
Yeah.
354
00:14:34,371 --> 00:14:37,239
Well, she had something
to do so she sent me
355
00:14:37,273 --> 00:14:40,274
with a list of instructions.
356
00:14:40,308 --> 00:14:41,908
Well, that's really
nice of you, Gibby,
357
00:14:41,943 --> 00:14:44,676
but I decided I'm gonna bail on
the whole cobras tryout thing,
358
00:14:44,711 --> 00:14:59,153
so you can run along and do
whatever it is Gibby's do, okay?
359
00:14:59,187 --> 00:15:03,690
Oh. What was that about?
360
00:15:03,725 --> 00:15:07,093
Well, Carly said, "if
Spencer tries to be lazy,
361
00:15:07,128 --> 00:15:09,729
"throw a cup of water in
his face to perk him up."
362
00:15:09,763 --> 00:15:10,630
Right.
363
00:15:10,664 --> 00:15:13,098
Well, that was hot coffee.
364
00:15:13,132 --> 00:15:15,033
Oh.
365
00:15:15,067 --> 00:15:16,100
Well, can I have a cup of water?
366
00:15:16,134 --> 00:15:19,135
No.
367
00:15:19,170 --> 00:15:28,509
Look, I promised Carly I'd work
out with you, so let's do this.
368
00:15:28,543 --> 00:15:30,243
Okay.
369
00:15:30,277 --> 00:15:32,245
We'll go for a run
around Woodley Park.
370
00:15:32,280 --> 00:15:33,646
But that's all the way across town.
371
00:15:33,681 --> 00:15:34,781
I know.
372
00:15:34,815 --> 00:15:36,182
Here's $10.
373
00:15:36,216 --> 00:15:38,652
You take a bus and I'll run there.
374
00:15:38,687 --> 00:15:40,988
And that way I'll get
even more exercise.
375
00:15:41,023 --> 00:15:41,956
Why can't I just run
with you to the park?
376
00:15:41,991 --> 00:15:43,057
Trust me this is a great plan.
377
00:15:43,091 --> 00:15:44,124
I promised Carly I'd
work out with you.
378
00:15:44,158 --> 00:15:45,158
Don't worry your pretty
head about that.
379
00:15:45,192 --> 00:15:46,292
Well, what time do you think
you'll get to the park?
380
00:15:46,327 --> 00:15:46,726
Wait there.
381
00:15:46,761 --> 00:15:47,293
You'll see me soon.
382
00:15:47,328 --> 00:15:48,261
Are you sure this is a good plan?
383
00:15:48,295 --> 00:15:48,928
You'll get tons of exercise.
384
00:15:48,963 --> 00:15:51,898
It's not my birthday-- I
know you're very pretty.
385
00:15:51,932 --> 00:15:53,532
[Music]
386
00:16:01,676 --> 00:16:03,443
Hey. Sorry I'm late.
387
00:16:03,478 --> 00:16:04,578
You're always late.
388
00:16:04,612 --> 00:16:05,912
So? It's cool.
389
00:16:05,946 --> 00:16:08,514
The show doesn't start
for three more minutes.
390
00:16:08,548 --> 00:16:10,616
Where's Fred weird?
391
00:16:10,650 --> 00:16:11,650
Freddie's not coming.
392
00:16:11,684 --> 00:16:14,119
What. Okay.
393
00:16:14,153 --> 00:16:15,386
He stayed home from school all week,
394
00:16:15,421 --> 00:16:17,221
he missed two iCarly
rehearsals, and now
395
00:16:17,256 --> 00:16:18,522
he's gonna miss the show?
396
00:16:18,556 --> 00:16:21,892
That's so unprofessional.
397
00:16:21,926 --> 00:16:23,726
You really hurt him.
398
00:16:23,761 --> 00:16:25,361
Every time he leaves the
house, he gets teased
399
00:16:25,396 --> 00:16:28,264
'cause you told the whole world
he's never kissed anyone.
400
00:16:28,298 --> 00:16:30,299
You know, he won't
even talk to his mom.
401
00:16:30,333 --> 00:16:32,467
He just sits on the fire escape
alone 'cause he's too embarrassed
402
00:16:32,502 --> 00:16:34,035
to see anyone.
403
00:16:34,069 --> 00:16:38,205
You like ruined his whole
life and you don't even care.
404
00:16:38,240 --> 00:16:38,539
All right.
405
00:16:38,573 --> 00:16:39,339
I'll go apologize.
406
00:16:39,374 --> 00:16:42,008
It doesn't even matter if you
apologize, kids are still
407
00:16:42,043 --> 00:16:43,776
gonna give him a hard time
'cause you can't take back
408
00:16:43,811 --> 00:16:44,744
what you said.
409
00:16:44,778 --> 00:16:47,746
Look, I didn't mean-- you
went too far this time
410
00:16:47,780 --> 00:16:50,047
and you can't fix it.
411
00:16:50,082 --> 00:16:53,117
[Beeping]
412
00:16:53,151 --> 00:16:54,818
We got to start the show.
413
00:16:54,853 --> 00:16:56,653
Well, how can I do the show,
now that you made me feel
414
00:16:56,687 --> 00:16:57,454
all depressed?
415
00:16:57,488 --> 00:16:57,954
I don't know.
416
00:16:57,989 --> 00:17:02,158
Just get in front of
the camera and do it.
417
00:17:02,192 --> 00:17:06,328
In five, four, three, two-- I'm Sam.
418
00:17:06,362 --> 00:17:07,095
And I'm Carly.
419
00:17:07,129 --> 00:17:08,296
And this is iCarly.
420
00:17:08,330 --> 00:17:10,698
The only Web show that
contains no trans fat.
421
00:17:10,732 --> 00:17:14,034
And keeps Kitty litter box
smelling fresh all day.
422
00:17:14,068 --> 00:17:16,136
And now, what you've
all been waiting for.
423
00:17:16,171 --> 00:17:21,509
Carly and I are about to have
our very first-- meatball war.
424
00:17:21,544 --> 00:17:23,011
[Cheering]
425
00:17:23,046 --> 00:17:24,146
We have our slingshots.
426
00:17:24,180 --> 00:17:28,516
And a hundred meatballs.
427
00:17:28,550 --> 00:17:38,357
But before we start our meatball
war, I wanna say something.
428
00:17:38,392 --> 00:17:40,926
On the last iCarly, I told
you guys that Freddie
429
00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:43,628
never kissed anyone.
430
00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:46,764
And that was really personal
and I shouldn't have said it
431
00:17:46,798 --> 00:17:49,933
on the show.
432
00:17:49,967 --> 00:17:51,701
And for all you people out there
who've been teasing Freddie
433
00:17:51,735 --> 00:17:54,904
about it, lay off, 'cause
I bet a whole lot of you
434
00:17:54,938 --> 00:18:04,978
haven't kissed anyone
either-- including me.
435
00:18:05,013 --> 00:18:06,880
Yeah, that's right.
436
00:18:06,914 --> 00:18:09,281
I've never kissed anyone.
437
00:18:09,316 --> 00:18:11,383
So, if you wanna tease
someone about it,
438
00:18:11,418 --> 00:18:20,390
tease me, which is a bad idea
unless you live near a hospital.
439
00:18:20,424 --> 00:18:23,225
Our meatball war will be
happening soon, but for now,
440
00:18:23,260 --> 00:18:32,732
please enjoy this photo of a
man with shrimp up his nose.
441
00:18:32,766 --> 00:18:34,867
Why did you stop the show?
442
00:18:34,902 --> 00:18:38,503
That was amazing what you just did.
443
00:18:38,537 --> 00:18:40,237
Eh.
444
00:18:40,271 --> 00:18:45,943
You lied so people would
stop teasing Freddie.
445
00:18:45,977 --> 00:18:48,278
I didn't lie.
446
00:18:48,313 --> 00:18:49,379
Wait.
447
00:18:49,413 --> 00:18:51,648
You've seriously never kissed anyone?
448
00:18:51,682 --> 00:18:52,682
You shocked?
449
00:18:52,716 --> 00:19:00,888
Well, yeah, but just because
you always seemed so willing.
450
00:19:00,923 --> 00:19:07,727
I'm gonna go talk to Freddie.
451
00:19:07,762 --> 00:19:12,231
I'm taking these meatballs.
452
00:19:12,266 --> 00:19:12,999
Did I tell you
453
00:19:13,033 --> 00:19:17,202
I knew your name
454
00:19:17,236 --> 00:19:18,270
but it seems that
455
00:19:18,304 --> 00:19:22,372
I've lost it
456
00:19:22,406 --> 00:19:23,539
did I tell you
457
00:19:23,574 --> 00:19:27,375
it's my own game
458
00:19:27,410 --> 00:19:30,410
this is not your problem
459
00:19:37,585 --> 00:19:39,185
what's up?
460
00:19:39,220 --> 00:19:41,220
Nothing.
461
00:19:47,127 --> 00:19:51,094
Meatball?
462
00:19:51,129 --> 00:19:53,129
No thanks.
463
00:20:00,336 --> 00:20:03,305
That was really brave what you said.
464
00:20:03,339 --> 00:20:06,274
You heard?
465
00:20:06,308 --> 00:20:14,549
You didn't think I'd miss iCarly.
466
00:20:14,583 --> 00:20:21,488
I'm sorry about telling people
you never kissed anyone,
467
00:20:21,522 --> 00:20:26,225
and about putting blue cheese
dressing in your shampoo bottle,
468
00:20:26,260 --> 00:20:30,296
and about sending your
cell phone to Cambodia.
469
00:20:30,330 --> 00:20:32,765
Everything, okay?
470
00:20:32,799 --> 00:20:34,800
So this means you're not
gonna mess with me anymore?
471
00:20:34,834 --> 00:20:37,168
No, I'm still gonna mess with you.
472
00:20:37,202 --> 00:20:38,870
I'm just gonna apologize
every few years
473
00:20:38,904 --> 00:20:41,839
so I can start fresh again.
474
00:20:41,874 --> 00:20:42,740
Good.
475
00:20:42,774 --> 00:20:43,507
Good?
476
00:20:43,542 --> 00:20:44,341
Yeah.
477
00:20:44,376 --> 00:20:45,576
It'd be too weird if you
didn't make my life
478
00:20:45,610 --> 00:20:49,246
miserable all the time.
479
00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:52,282
But you know, maybe you could
pull back just a little bit--
480
00:20:52,316 --> 00:20:52,916
I don't think so.
481
00:20:52,950 --> 00:20:57,120
Yeah, I didn't either.
482
00:20:57,154 --> 00:20:59,088
It's so dumb.
483
00:20:59,123 --> 00:20:59,822
What do you mean?
484
00:20:59,857 --> 00:21:05,026
You know, how people get all
freaked out over their first kiss.
485
00:21:05,061 --> 00:21:06,761
Stupid.
486
00:21:06,795 --> 00:21:08,296
So you weren't lying?
487
00:21:08,330 --> 00:21:10,327
You've really never kissed anyone?
488
00:21:10,362 --> 00:21:13,362
Nope.
489
00:21:13,396 --> 00:21:17,098
Sometimes I just wish I can
get it out of the way.
490
00:21:17,132 --> 00:21:18,399
Yeah, you know, me too.
491
00:21:18,433 --> 00:21:20,067
Right?
492
00:21:20,101 --> 00:21:21,735
You know, just so I can
stop worrying about it.
493
00:21:21,769 --> 00:21:26,005
Yeah.
494
00:21:26,039 --> 00:21:27,339
What?
495
00:21:27,374 --> 00:21:29,474
Nothing.
It's-- tell me.
496
00:21:29,508 --> 00:21:30,608
No, it's dumb.
497
00:21:30,643 --> 00:21:32,310
Say it.
498
00:21:32,344 --> 00:21:42,319
Okay. I was just gonna
say-- that we should kiss?
499
00:21:42,353 --> 00:21:46,223
You're gonna break my arm now, right?
500
00:21:46,257 --> 00:21:48,725
No.
501
00:21:48,759 --> 00:21:53,062
Well, should we?
502
00:21:53,096 --> 00:21:55,597
Just so both of us can
get it over with?
503
00:21:55,632 --> 00:21:59,334
Hmm.
504
00:21:59,368 --> 00:22:00,902
Just to get it over with.
505
00:22:00,936 --> 00:22:01,869
Just to get it over with.
506
00:22:01,904 --> 00:22:04,038
And you swear we both go right
back to hating each other
507
00:22:04,072 --> 00:22:05,072
as soon as it's over.
508
00:22:05,107 --> 00:22:05,639
Oh, totally.
509
00:22:05,674 --> 00:22:06,974
And we never tell anyone.
510
00:22:07,008 --> 00:22:08,608
Never.
511
00:22:13,247 --> 00:22:17,382
Well, when?
512
00:22:17,417 --> 00:22:18,016
I don't know
513
00:22:18,051 --> 00:22:21,219
if I'm gonna change
514
00:22:21,253 --> 00:22:24,253
wasting time and another day
515
00:22:39,301 --> 00:22:42,170
well, that was-- nice?
516
00:22:42,204 --> 00:22:45,672
Yeah, nice.
517
00:22:45,707 --> 00:22:46,373
Good work.
518
00:22:46,407 --> 00:22:46,807
Thank you.
519
00:22:46,841 --> 00:22:51,844
You too.
520
00:22:51,845 --> 00:22:55,180
I keep running away
521
00:22:55,215 --> 00:23:00,418
Hey, I hate you.
522
00:23:00,452 --> 00:23:02,262
Hate you too.
523
00:23:02,312 --> 00:23:06,862
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
33953
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
