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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,677 --> 00:00:12,213 STARRING ANDY GRIFFITH... 2 00:00:12,246 --> 00:00:14,515 WITH RONNY HOWARD... 3 00:00:14,548 --> 00:00:18,152 ALSO STARRING DON KNOTTS. 4 00:00:26,794 --> 00:00:32,800 * ...ACROSS THE WAY 5 00:00:32,833 --> 00:00:35,636 * I'LL... 6 00:00:49,417 --> 00:00:51,319 YEAH. 7 00:00:51,352 --> 00:00:53,254 YEAH. 8 00:00:53,287 --> 00:00:54,722 WELL, IT'S SUNDAY. 9 00:00:57,825 --> 00:00:59,327 YEAH. 10 00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:02,230 TOMORROW'S THELMA LOU'S BIRTHDAY, YOU KNOW THAT? 11 00:01:02,263 --> 00:01:04,565 OH, IS IT? BLESS HER HEART. 12 00:01:04,598 --> 00:01:06,367 I AIN'T GOT HER ANYTHING YET. 13 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:07,335 WHAT YOU GONNA GET HER? 14 00:01:07,368 --> 00:01:08,669 WELL, I DON'T KNOW. 15 00:01:08,702 --> 00:01:11,739 SHE'S SO HARD TO BUY FOR. SHE'S GOT EVERYTHING. 16 00:01:11,772 --> 00:01:13,207 YEAH. 17 00:01:13,241 --> 00:01:15,443 YOU KNOW, DRESSES AND ALL LIKE THAT. 18 00:01:15,476 --> 00:01:17,578 I'LL PROBABLY JUST GO OUT TOMORROW 19 00:01:17,611 --> 00:01:19,747 AND PICK UP THE FIRST THING I SEE. 20 00:01:19,780 --> 00:01:21,649 I EXPECT. 21 00:01:21,682 --> 00:01:23,117 YEAH. 22 00:01:24,285 --> 00:01:26,787 YOU FEEL LIKE A BOTTLE OF POP, AND? 23 00:01:28,689 --> 00:01:29,690 NO. 24 00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:32,326 OH. 25 00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:33,661 WELL, I DO. 26 00:01:35,263 --> 00:01:36,864 YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK I'LL DO? 27 00:01:36,897 --> 00:01:38,332 WHAT? 28 00:01:38,366 --> 00:01:41,902 I THINK I'LL GO DOWN TO THE FILLING STATION, 29 00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:44,505 GET ME A BOTTLE OF POP. 30 00:01:44,538 --> 00:01:47,275 GO HOME, TAKE A NAP. 31 00:01:47,308 --> 00:01:50,311 AND GO OVER TO THELMA LOU'S AND WATCH A LITTLE TV. 32 00:01:50,344 --> 00:01:53,647 HMM. 33 00:01:53,681 --> 00:01:56,850 YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I'M GONNA DO. 34 00:01:56,884 --> 00:02:01,655 GO DOWN TO THE FILLING STATION, GET ME A BOTTLE OF POP. 35 00:02:01,689 --> 00:02:04,558 HOME, TAKE A NAP. 36 00:02:04,592 --> 00:02:08,362 AND THEN GO OVER TO THELMA LOU'S AND WATCH A LITTLE TV. 37 00:02:13,667 --> 00:02:16,437 ARE YOU SURE YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE A BOTTLE OF POP? 38 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:17,638 NO. 39 00:02:18,672 --> 00:02:20,174 WELL, I DO. 40 00:02:21,909 --> 00:02:24,878 YEAH. THAT'S WHAT I'M GOING TO DO. 41 00:02:26,580 --> 00:02:30,418 GO DOWN TO THE FILLING STATION, GET ME A BOTTLE OF POP. 42 00:02:30,451 --> 00:02:33,321 GO HOME, TAKE A NAP... 43 00:02:33,354 --> 00:02:35,789 THEN OVER TO THELMA LOU'S. 44 00:02:35,823 --> 00:02:37,591 WATCH A LITTLE TV? 45 00:02:37,625 --> 00:02:39,793 YEAH. 46 00:02:46,367 --> 00:02:50,170 [ RADIO PLAYING COUNTRY FIDDLE MUSIC ] 47 00:02:54,975 --> 00:02:55,943 HI, GOOB. 48 00:02:55,976 --> 00:02:57,211 HEY, BARN. 49 00:02:57,245 --> 00:02:58,646 WANNA SEE SOMETHIN'? 50 00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:00,681 LOOK AT THIS. 51 00:03:00,714 --> 00:03:02,216 TRANSISTOR RADIO, HUH? 52 00:03:02,250 --> 00:03:03,551 YEAH. I JUST BOUGHT IT. 53 00:03:03,584 --> 00:03:04,918 AIN'T IT NEAT? YEAH. 54 00:03:04,952 --> 00:03:06,254 LISTEN TO IT PLAY. 55 00:03:06,287 --> 00:03:08,489 KNOW WHERE THAT MUSIC'S COMING FROM? 56 00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:09,523 UH-UH. 57 00:03:09,557 --> 00:03:10,958 RALEIGH. THAT'S 60 MILES AWAY. 58 00:03:10,991 --> 00:03:12,426 WHERE'D YOU GET THAT? 59 00:03:12,460 --> 00:03:15,329 FROM THAT FELLER RIGHT OVER THERE. 60 00:03:17,265 --> 00:03:19,967 BOY, YOU OUGHT TO LOOK AT ALL THAT STUFF HE'S GOT. 61 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,836 HE'S SELLING ALL KINDS OF STUFF, AND CHEAP, TOO. 62 00:03:22,870 --> 00:03:24,605 WELL...WELL, MAYBE I WILL. 63 00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:28,442 YOU MADE A NICE BUY, SIR. 64 00:03:28,476 --> 00:03:30,444 GIVE YOU YEARS OF PLEASURE. 65 00:03:30,478 --> 00:03:31,812 OH, I KNOW, I KNOW. 66 00:03:31,845 --> 00:03:33,681 IT'S A BEAUTIFUL THING. 67 00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:34,848 LOOKS NICE ON YOU, TOO. 68 00:03:34,882 --> 00:03:36,484 ESPECIALLY WITH THE GREEN PANTS 69 00:03:36,517 --> 00:03:38,552 AND THE BLACK AND WHITE SPORTS SHOES. 70 00:03:38,586 --> 00:03:40,788 SORT OF A...SYMPHONY, ISN'T IT? 71 00:03:40,821 --> 00:03:42,490 HEY, BARN. HEY, LOOK 72 00:03:42,523 --> 00:03:43,491 AT MY NEW WATCH. 73 00:03:43,524 --> 00:03:44,492 HI, FLOYD. 74 00:03:44,525 --> 00:03:45,626 HOWDY. HELLO. 75 00:03:45,659 --> 00:03:46,727 ISN'T IT NIFTY? 76 00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:48,796 IT'S KIND OF BIG, ISN'T IT? 77 00:03:48,829 --> 00:03:50,864 HEY, WHAT KIND OF REMARK IS THAT? 78 00:03:50,898 --> 00:03:52,600 I MEAN, IS THAT WHAT YOU DO? 79 00:03:52,633 --> 00:03:55,969 YOU WALK RIGHT UP TO A FELLA AND GIVE HIM A KNOCK LIKE THAT? 80 00:03:56,003 --> 00:03:56,904 WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 81 00:03:56,937 --> 00:03:58,639 YOUR FRIEND HERE 82 00:03:58,672 --> 00:04:01,041 JUST BOUGHT HIMSELF A NICE WATCH AND HE WANTS YOUR APPROVAL. 83 00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:03,377 CAN'T YOU GIVE HIM A LITTLE COMPLIMENT, 84 00:04:03,411 --> 00:04:04,478 SAY SOMETHING NICE? 85 00:04:04,512 --> 00:04:05,913 "IT'S KIND OF BIG, ISN'T IT?" 86 00:04:05,946 --> 00:04:08,048 I MEAN, WHERE'S YOUR SENSITIVITY? 87 00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:09,683 LOOK AT ALL IT TELLS YOU. 88 00:04:09,717 --> 00:04:11,785 SEE? THE TIME, THE DAY, THE DATE, 89 00:04:11,819 --> 00:04:13,321 AND THE TEMPERATURE. 90 00:04:13,354 --> 00:04:15,556 THAT'S WHY IT'S BIG-- LOT OF THINGS IN THERE. 91 00:04:15,589 --> 00:04:16,990 NO ALARM ON IT, HUH? 92 00:04:17,024 --> 00:04:18,759 THERE HE GOES AGAIN. 93 00:04:18,792 --> 00:04:20,861 AW, GEE, BARN, IT ONLY COST $8.98. 94 00:04:20,894 --> 00:04:21,895 UH-OH...2:35. 95 00:04:21,929 --> 00:04:23,564 SEE, I'VE GOT TO GET HOME. 96 00:04:23,597 --> 00:04:26,066 HEY, GOOBER, WANT TO SEE MY NEW WATCH? 97 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,435 SEE YOU AROUND, SIR. 98 00:04:27,468 --> 00:04:29,670 THERE GOES ANOTHER SATISFIED CUSTOMER. 99 00:04:29,703 --> 00:04:30,971 WHAT ABOUT YOU, FRIEND? 100 00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:32,406 WANT TO BUY SOMETHING? 101 00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:33,707 OH, NO. I DON'T KNOW... 102 00:04:33,741 --> 00:04:35,976 WHAT DO YOU NEED? PLATES 103 00:04:36,009 --> 00:04:37,911 STEAK KNIVES? CHOP SUEY DISHES? 104 00:04:37,945 --> 00:04:40,514 HOW ABOUT A WATCH LIKE YOUR FRIEND BOUGHT? 105 00:04:40,548 --> 00:04:42,350 NO...NO. 106 00:04:42,383 --> 00:04:45,018 UH, YOU WOULDN'T HAVE ANYTHING FOR A GIRL IN THERE, WOULD YOU? 107 00:04:45,052 --> 00:04:46,987 LITTLE GIRL...BIG GIRL? 108 00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:48,021 BIG GIRL. 109 00:04:48,055 --> 00:04:50,824 WELL, I MEAN, SHE'S ABOUT... 110 00:04:50,858 --> 00:04:52,092 THIS JUST A GIRL 111 00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:54,895 OR...COULD THIS MAYBE BE THE GIRL? 112 00:04:54,928 --> 00:04:56,697 OH, WELL... 113 00:04:56,730 --> 00:04:57,798 COME ON, SPORT. 114 00:04:57,831 --> 00:04:59,400 COME ON. YOU CAN LEVEL WITH ME. 115 00:04:59,433 --> 00:05:00,868 IT'S THE GIRL, ISN'T IT? 116 00:05:00,901 --> 00:05:04,338 WELL, YEAH, I GUESS YOU COULD SAY IT'S THE GIRL. 117 00:05:04,372 --> 00:05:05,939 THEN YOU WANT SOMETHING SPECIAL? 118 00:05:05,973 --> 00:05:06,974 YEAH. 119 00:05:07,007 --> 00:05:08,709 UH-HUH. I GOT JUST THE THING. 120 00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:12,079 TAKE A LOOK AT THIS. 121 00:05:12,112 --> 00:05:13,080 A RING? 122 00:05:13,113 --> 00:05:14,114 AIN'T THAT A BEAUTY? 123 00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:15,683 YOU KNOW WHAT THEY CALL THIS? 124 00:05:15,716 --> 00:05:16,850 "THE STAR OF PEORIA." 125 00:05:16,884 --> 00:05:18,886 NO. LISTEN, I DON'T WANT ANY RING. 126 00:05:18,919 --> 00:05:20,421 SHE'S THE GIRL, ALL RIGHT 127 00:05:20,454 --> 00:05:22,823 BUT I DON'T WANT HER GETTING ANY IDEAS. 128 00:05:22,856 --> 00:05:23,991 OH... 129 00:05:24,024 --> 00:05:26,460 WANT TO STRING HER ALONG A LITTLE, HUH? 130 00:05:26,494 --> 00:05:28,462 OH, WELL, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT. 131 00:05:28,496 --> 00:05:31,365 I GUESS YOU WANT SOMETHING A LITTLE LESS PERSONAL, RIGHT? 132 00:05:31,399 --> 00:05:32,533 YEAH. NOW YOU GOT IT. 133 00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:34,502 HOW ABOUT A PENCIL SHARPENER? 134 00:05:34,535 --> 00:05:35,903 SAY, THAT'S NOT A BAD IDEA. 135 00:05:35,936 --> 00:05:37,438 SHE'S ALWAYS BREAKING THE POINTS... 136 00:05:37,471 --> 00:05:40,641 WAIT A MINUTE. I GOT JUST THE THING. 137 00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:43,977 WELL, THE PENCIL SHARPENER WASN'T A BAD IDEA. 138 00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:45,713 LOOK AT THIS, HUH? 139 00:05:45,746 --> 00:05:46,780 WOW. 140 00:05:46,814 --> 00:05:47,781 FEEL IT. 141 00:05:47,815 --> 00:05:49,417 OH, THAT'S SOFT. 142 00:05:49,450 --> 00:05:50,718 BLOW ON IT. 143 00:05:51,885 --> 00:05:54,722 YOU SEE? THAT'S THE WAY YOU TELL GENUINE FUR. 144 00:05:54,755 --> 00:05:55,989 OH, YEAH? 145 00:05:56,023 --> 00:05:58,025 PUT IT AROUND YOUR NECK ONCE. 146 00:05:58,058 --> 00:05:59,860 YOU'LL SEE HOW IT FEELS. 147 00:06:00,894 --> 00:06:01,995 YOU KNOW SOMETHING? 148 00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:02,996 HUH? 149 00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:04,632 THAT LOOKS BEAUTIFUL... 150 00:06:04,665 --> 00:06:06,867 YES, REALLY BEAUTIFUL ON YOU. 151 00:06:06,900 --> 00:06:08,368 OH, REALLY? 152 00:06:10,838 --> 00:06:13,140 OH, WELL, LISTEN, I DON'T WANT TO SPEND THIS MUCH. 153 00:06:13,173 --> 00:06:15,476 AFTER ALL, SHE HAS A BIRTHDAY EVERY YEAR. 154 00:06:15,509 --> 00:06:16,577 WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 155 00:06:16,610 --> 00:06:18,679 YOU WON'T GO FOR 13 AND A QUARTER? 156 00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:20,481 WHAT KIND OF A LOVER ARE YOU? 157 00:06:20,514 --> 00:06:21,549 13 AND A QUARTER? 158 00:06:21,582 --> 00:06:22,916 YEAH. THAT'S ALL IT COSTS. 159 00:06:22,950 --> 00:06:25,185 I BET YOU THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO COST A LOT MORE. 160 00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:27,120 LISTEN, I'LL LET YOU IN ON A SECRET. 161 00:06:27,154 --> 00:06:29,056 I GOT A FANTASTIC BUY AT A WAREHOUSE. 162 00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:32,059 I HAPPENED TO BE AROUND AT THE RIGHT PLACE AT THE RIGHT TIME. 163 00:06:32,092 --> 00:06:35,028 AN OPPORTUNITY LIKE THIS DOESN'T COME ALONG EVERY DAY. 164 00:06:40,801 --> 00:06:41,902 SHE'LL LOVE IT. 165 00:06:41,935 --> 00:06:43,904 THIS'LL MAKE A BIG MAN OUT OF YOU. 166 00:06:49,176 --> 00:06:52,613 BOY, I WISH YOU COULD'VE SEEN THE LOOK ON HER FACE, AND. 167 00:06:52,646 --> 00:06:54,948 I NEVER WILL FORGET THAT LOOK. 168 00:06:54,982 --> 00:06:57,851 I ACTUALLY THOUGHT SHE WAS GONNA CRY. 169 00:06:57,885 --> 00:06:58,886 I EXPECT. 170 00:07:00,554 --> 00:07:01,822 HERE. 171 00:07:03,056 --> 00:07:06,494 WHAT'D IT SET YOU BACK? 172 00:07:06,527 --> 00:07:07,495 HUH? 173 00:07:07,528 --> 00:07:08,796 WHAT'D YOU PAY FOR THE FUR? 174 00:07:08,829 --> 00:07:11,198 WELL, THAT'S KIND OF PERSONAL, ISN'T IT, ANDY? 175 00:07:11,231 --> 00:07:13,000 I MEAN, I WOULDN'T ASK YOU. 176 00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:14,101 THE HECK YOU WOULDN'T. 177 00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:15,202 WHAT? 178 00:07:15,235 --> 00:07:17,104 IF I GAVE HELEN ANYTHING LIKE THAT 179 00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:18,606 YOU'D WORRY ME TO DEATH 180 00:07:18,639 --> 00:07:20,674 TILL I TOLD YOU WHAT I PAID FOR IT 181 00:07:20,708 --> 00:07:21,975 AND YOU KNOW YOU WOULD. 182 00:07:22,009 --> 00:07:23,777 NOW, WHAT'D YOU PAY FOR IT? 183 00:07:23,811 --> 00:07:26,046 WELL...I CAN GIVE YOU A LITTLE HINT... 184 00:07:26,079 --> 00:07:27,915 IT WAS MORE THAN TEN DOLLARS. 185 00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:30,017 WELL, I FIGURED THAT. 186 00:07:30,050 --> 00:07:32,019 WHAT WAS IT, 50? 187 00:07:32,052 --> 00:07:33,521 MORE THAN 50? 188 00:07:33,554 --> 00:07:36,957 COME ON, AND, WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR, 189 00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:38,125 MONEYBAGS? 190 00:07:38,158 --> 00:07:39,827 WHAT'D YOU PAY FOR IT, THEN? 191 00:07:39,860 --> 00:07:41,094 13 AND A QUARTER. 192 00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:42,596 13 AND A QUARTER? 193 00:07:42,630 --> 00:07:43,731 YEAH. 194 00:07:43,764 --> 00:07:45,533 HOW CAN YOU BUY A FUR PIECE 195 00:07:45,566 --> 00:07:47,234 FOR 13 AND A QUARTER? 196 00:07:47,267 --> 00:07:48,602 IS THAT A LOT? 197 00:07:48,636 --> 00:07:50,003 NO. THAT'S NOTHING. 198 00:07:50,037 --> 00:07:52,606 HOW CAN A MAN SELL A FUR PIECE 199 00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:54,575 FOR 13 AND A QUARTER? 200 00:07:54,608 --> 00:07:55,876 OH, WELL, HE EXPLAINED THAT. 201 00:07:55,909 --> 00:07:57,978 THERE WAS THIS CLOSEOUT AT THIS WAREHOUSE 202 00:07:58,011 --> 00:08:00,247 AND HE JUST HAPPENED TO BE AT THE RIGHT PLACE 203 00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:01,615 AT THE RIGHT TIME. 204 00:08:01,649 --> 00:08:03,016 BARN... 205 00:08:03,050 --> 00:08:06,754 I HATE TO SAY THIS, BUT I GOT A TERRIBLE SUSPICION. 206 00:08:06,787 --> 00:08:07,855 WHAT'S THAT? 207 00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:09,022 I'LL TELL YOU WHAT YOU DO. 208 00:08:09,056 --> 00:08:10,924 GO OVER TO WEAVER'S DEPARTMENT STORE 209 00:08:10,958 --> 00:08:12,292 AND LOOK AT THE FURS. 210 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:13,994 SEE IF YOU SEE ANYTHING IN THERE FOR UNDER $50. 211 00:08:14,027 --> 00:08:15,629 MOST OF 'EM ARE A LOT MORE. 212 00:08:15,663 --> 00:08:17,097 BUT HE EXPLAINED THAT, ANDY. 213 00:08:17,130 --> 00:08:19,633 THERE WAS THIS CLOSEOUT AT THIS WAREHOUSE... 214 00:08:19,667 --> 00:08:20,834 UH-HUH-HUH-HUH. 215 00:08:20,868 --> 00:08:22,235 I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING 216 00:08:22,269 --> 00:08:25,205 BUT HOW DO YOU KNOW HE WAS TELLING THE TRUTH? 217 00:08:26,974 --> 00:08:28,175 YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK? 218 00:08:28,208 --> 00:08:30,210 I THINK THAT FELLA'S SELLING STOLEN GOODS. 219 00:08:30,243 --> 00:08:31,679 OH, COME ON, ANDY. 220 00:08:31,712 --> 00:08:34,548 YOU THINK HE COULD'VE FOOLED ME FOR A SECOND 221 00:08:34,582 --> 00:08:36,149 IF HE WAS A CRIMINAL TYPE? 222 00:08:36,183 --> 00:08:37,918 ME, A PROFESSIONAL LAWMAN? 223 00:08:37,951 --> 00:08:39,052 HE WAS NO CROOK. 224 00:08:39,086 --> 00:08:40,287 OH, MY GOOD... 225 00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:43,323 UH-HUH. 226 00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:45,092 WELL...TIME TO GO TO WORK. 227 00:08:45,125 --> 00:08:48,061 I MEAN, IF THERE WAS ANYTHING FUNNY ABOUT HIM 228 00:08:48,095 --> 00:08:50,297 I WOULD HAVE SPOTTED IT LIKE THAT. 229 00:08:50,330 --> 00:08:51,599 STOLEN GOODS. 230 00:08:53,333 --> 00:08:54,301 HEY, ANDY. 231 00:08:54,334 --> 00:08:55,803 HI, BOYS. MORNING, GOOB. 232 00:08:55,836 --> 00:08:56,837 WHAT'S UP? 233 00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:58,071 WE BEEN WAITIN' ON YOU. 234 00:08:58,105 --> 00:08:59,840 YEAH. SOMETHING'S COME UP. 235 00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:02,275 YESTERDAY THERE WAS A FELLER SELLIN' STUFF 236 00:09:02,309 --> 00:09:03,811 AT THE FILLING STATION. 237 00:09:03,844 --> 00:09:05,012 WHAT ABOUT HIM? 238 00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:06,980 WELL, ME AND FLOYD GOT GYPPED. 239 00:09:07,014 --> 00:09:08,215 SEE THIS RADIO I BOUGHT? 240 00:09:08,248 --> 00:09:09,216 IT DON'T PLAY NO MORE. 241 00:09:09,249 --> 00:09:10,217 IT DON'T? 242 00:09:10,250 --> 00:09:11,652 AND THIS WATCH I... 243 00:09:11,685 --> 00:09:13,053 LOOK AT THAT SECOND HAND. 244 00:09:13,086 --> 00:09:15,288 IT'S SPINNING AROUND LIKE A PINWHEEL. 245 00:09:15,322 --> 00:09:17,224 IT'S GOING CRAZY, ALL RIGHT. 246 00:09:17,257 --> 00:09:18,826 YOU SURE YOU DIDN'T DROP THAT WATCH? 247 00:09:18,859 --> 00:09:20,828 I CAN'T IMAGINE THAT FELLA CHEATING YOU. 248 00:09:23,864 --> 00:09:25,065 SHERIFF'S OFFICE. 249 00:09:25,098 --> 00:09:26,834 OH, YEAH. YEAH, HE IS. JUST A SECOND. 250 00:09:26,867 --> 00:09:28,201 THELMA LOU. 251 00:09:28,235 --> 00:09:30,604 OH. 252 00:09:30,638 --> 00:09:32,272 HI, HONEY, WHAT'S UP? 253 00:09:32,305 --> 00:09:33,273 HUH? 254 00:09:33,306 --> 00:09:35,175 WELL, WHAT ABOUT THE FUR? 255 00:09:37,277 --> 00:09:39,279 WELL, DON'T CRY, HONEY. 256 00:09:39,312 --> 00:09:42,850 WELL...WE'LL GO AND TALK TO THE FELLA. 257 00:09:42,883 --> 00:09:44,752 PLEASE DON'T CRY. 258 00:09:44,785 --> 00:09:47,154 WELL, DON'T SHAKE IT ANYMORE. 259 00:09:47,187 --> 00:09:50,357 YEAH, WELL, I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER. 260 00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:52,092 ALL RIGHT. BYE. 261 00:09:55,729 --> 00:09:58,165 HMM. 262 00:09:58,198 --> 00:10:02,402 FUR'S STARTING TO FALL OUT, RIGHT? 263 00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:05,639 THAT FELLA'S PROBABLY A MILLION MILES FROM HERE NOW. 264 00:10:05,673 --> 00:10:07,307 OH, NO. HE'S STILL HERE. 265 00:10:07,340 --> 00:10:08,976 JUST UP THE BLOCK. 266 00:10:09,009 --> 00:10:11,011 YOU FELLAS GO ON BACK TO WORK. 267 00:10:11,044 --> 00:10:12,713 WE'LL TAKE CARE OF THIS. 268 00:10:12,746 --> 00:10:13,714 LET'S GO, BARN. 269 00:10:13,747 --> 00:10:15,048 WANT TO KNOW SOMETHING? 270 00:10:15,082 --> 00:10:16,984 THAT MERCHANDISE COULD BE HOT. 271 00:10:17,017 --> 00:10:18,351 YEAH. STOLEN GOODS. 272 00:10:24,157 --> 00:10:26,894 THAT'S RIGHT. I HAVE THESE ESPECIALLY IMPORTED 273 00:10:26,927 --> 00:10:28,195 FROM THE FAR EAST. 274 00:10:28,228 --> 00:10:30,731 THEY COME IN ALL THE LATEST DECORATOR COLORS. 275 00:10:30,764 --> 00:10:33,200 ALL RIGHT, MISTER, WE'D LIKE TO TALK TO YOU. 276 00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:35,803 UH, JUST A MOMENT. PLEASE BE PATIENT, SIR. 277 00:10:35,836 --> 00:10:37,304 THIS BUSINESS IS CLOSED. 278 00:10:37,337 --> 00:10:38,772 MOVE IT ALONG. BARN... 279 00:10:38,806 --> 00:10:39,807 TAKE IT EASY. 280 00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:41,208 FOLKS, WOULD YOU MIND? 281 00:10:41,241 --> 00:10:43,110 WE WANT TO TALK WITH THIS MAN IN PRIVATE. 282 00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:44,845 THIS IS OFFICIAL POLICE BUSINESS. 283 00:10:44,878 --> 00:10:46,279 WHAT IS THIS? WHAT'S GOING ON? 284 00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:47,748 YOU JUST RUINED A SALE. 285 00:10:47,781 --> 00:10:49,449 THEY WERE GOING TO BUY THE CHOP SUEY DISHES. 286 00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:51,685 THIS IS SHERIFF TAYLOR. I'M DEPUTY FIFE 287 00:10:51,719 --> 00:10:53,353 AND WE'D LIKE TO ASK YOU A FEW QUESTIONS. 288 00:10:53,386 --> 00:10:54,421 WHAT ABOUT? 289 00:10:54,454 --> 00:10:56,223 HEY, I KNOW YOU, DON'T I? 290 00:10:56,256 --> 00:10:58,859 YOU BOUGHT SOMETHING FROM ME YESTERDAY. 291 00:10:58,892 --> 00:11:00,093 YEAH. I BOUGHT SOMETHING-- 292 00:11:00,127 --> 00:11:01,428 A FUR. 293 00:11:01,461 --> 00:11:04,097 WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU WERE A COP, DUMB 294 00:11:04,131 --> 00:11:06,299 I GIVE TEN PERCENT OFF TO MEN IN UNIFORM. 295 00:11:06,333 --> 00:11:07,100 WHAT?! 296 00:11:07,134 --> 00:11:08,335 BARN... 297 00:11:08,368 --> 00:11:11,338 COULD WE ASK WHERE YOU GOT THIS STUFF? 298 00:11:11,371 --> 00:11:12,973 NO, I DON'T MIND. I BOUGHT IT. 299 00:11:13,006 --> 00:11:15,408 I'LL BET. PROBABLY STOLE IT OUT OF SOME WAREHOUSE. 300 00:11:15,442 --> 00:11:17,878 YOU WERE IN THE RIGHT PLACE AT THE RIGHT TIME 301 00:11:17,911 --> 00:11:19,947 CLIMBING IN A WINDOW AT MIDNIGHT. 302 00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:21,114 WHOA! HEY! 303 00:11:21,148 --> 00:11:22,182 "CLIMBING IN A WINDOW AT MIDNIGHT" 304 00:11:22,215 --> 00:11:24,117 ARE YOU ACCUSING ME OF STEALING? 305 00:11:24,151 --> 00:11:25,118 WHAT ELSE IS IT? 306 00:11:25,152 --> 00:11:26,820 YOU CAN'T CALL ME A THIEF. 307 00:11:26,854 --> 00:11:27,821 NO. NO? 308 00:11:27,855 --> 00:11:28,922 HOLD IT, HOLD IT. 309 00:11:28,956 --> 00:11:30,490 HE'S CALLING ME A THIEF. 310 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:33,026 DID YOU HEAR THAT, LADY? I'M A THIEF. 311 00:11:33,060 --> 00:11:34,862 FROM LEFT FIELD, THIS COP CALLED ME A THIEF. 312 00:11:34,895 --> 00:11:36,163 I'M A THIEF. 313 00:11:36,196 --> 00:11:37,230 BREAK IT UP. 314 00:11:37,264 --> 00:11:38,265 ALL RIGHT. 315 00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:39,266 SURE. WE'LL STOP. 316 00:11:39,299 --> 00:11:40,267 THIEF! 317 00:11:40,300 --> 00:11:41,434 IF YOU BOUGHT THIS STUFF 318 00:11:41,468 --> 00:11:43,370 YOU MUST HAVE A BILL OF SALE, RIGHT? 319 00:11:43,403 --> 00:11:44,938 YEAH. I GOT A BILL OF SALE 320 00:11:44,972 --> 00:11:47,074 BUT THIS MAN SAID SOMETHING TERRIBLE TO ME. 321 00:11:47,107 --> 00:11:48,175 YOU CALLED ME A THIEF! 322 00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:49,843 LET ME SEE THE BILL OF SALE. 323 00:11:49,877 --> 00:11:51,344 I'LL SHOW YOU THE BILL OF SALE, 324 00:11:51,378 --> 00:11:53,146 BUT FIRST, HE MADE A BITTER ACCUSATION. 325 00:11:53,180 --> 00:11:54,948 YOU CAN'T COME UP TO A GUY 326 00:11:54,982 --> 00:11:56,016 AND CALL HIM A THIEF. 327 00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:57,350 LET ME SEE THE BILL OF SALE. 328 00:11:57,384 --> 00:11:59,019 HE OWES ME AN APOLOGY FIRST. 329 00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:01,488 HE'S SORRY! NOW, LET ME SEE THE BILL OF SALE. 330 00:12:02,923 --> 00:12:04,224 HERE. 331 00:12:04,257 --> 00:12:07,294 BOY, YOU FELLAS THINK I DEAL IN STOLEN GOODS. 332 00:12:07,327 --> 00:12:09,462 CLIMB IN A WINDOW IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT-- 333 00:12:09,496 --> 00:12:11,031 IS THAT THE PICTURE YOU GOT? 334 00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:12,399 COMMON ORDINARY THIEF? 335 00:12:12,432 --> 00:12:14,902 I'M GRATEFUL MY MOTHER ISN'T HERE TO HEAR ALL THIS. 336 00:12:14,935 --> 00:12:17,771 IMAGINE WHAT THIS COULD DO TO A WOMAN IN HER LATE 50s. 337 00:12:17,805 --> 00:12:20,007 YOU FELLAS KNOW HOW TO CUT A GUY REAL DEEP. 338 00:12:20,040 --> 00:12:21,775 ALL RIGHT. LET'S BREAK IT UP. 339 00:12:21,809 --> 00:12:23,443 YEAH. GO AWAY. I'M A THIEF. 340 00:12:23,476 --> 00:12:25,545 BREAK IT UP. GO AWAY FROM THE THIEF. 341 00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:26,780 MOVE IT, MOVE IT! 342 00:12:26,814 --> 00:12:27,881 I'M A THIEF, BUDDY. 343 00:12:27,915 --> 00:12:29,182 MAN CALLS ME A THIEF. 344 00:12:29,216 --> 00:12:30,417 GO AWAY FROM THE THIEF. 345 00:12:30,450 --> 00:12:31,418 ALL RIGHT... 346 00:12:31,451 --> 00:12:32,886 YOUR NAME NEWTON MONROE? 347 00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:35,222 THAT'S ME, AND I'M NOT A THIEF. 348 00:12:35,255 --> 00:12:38,091 YEAH. WHAT ABOUT THAT FUR YOU SOLD ME? 349 00:12:38,125 --> 00:12:39,459 DIDN'T SHE LIKE IT? 350 00:12:39,492 --> 00:12:42,062 LIKE IT?! THE FUR'S COMING OUT OF IT. 351 00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:43,096 REALLY? 352 00:12:43,130 --> 00:12:44,932 I DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT. 353 00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:46,433 HOW IS IT COMING OUT-- 354 00:12:46,466 --> 00:12:50,303 A FEW HAIRS AT A TIME OR WAS IT COMING OUT IN BUNCHES? 355 00:12:50,337 --> 00:12:51,571 BUNCHES, BUNCHES! 356 00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:53,106 OH, I'M SORRY. 357 00:12:53,140 --> 00:12:54,975 LET ME GIVE YOU SOMETHING ELSE. 358 00:12:55,008 --> 00:12:56,476 HOW ABOUT A TRANSISTOR RADIO? 359 00:12:56,509 --> 00:12:57,577 A WATCH? 360 00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,346 ANYTHING AT ALL I GOT IN THE SHOP. 361 00:12:59,379 --> 00:13:00,513 ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. 362 00:13:00,547 --> 00:13:01,949 EVERYTHING'S IN ORDER. 363 00:13:01,982 --> 00:13:03,350 WHAT?! LET ME SEE THAT. 364 00:13:03,383 --> 00:13:05,252 WELL, THIS MUST BE FORGED. 365 00:13:05,285 --> 00:13:06,253 FORGED?! 366 00:13:06,286 --> 00:13:07,855 HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT! 367 00:13:07,888 --> 00:13:10,357 WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? NOW I'M A FORGER. 368 00:13:10,390 --> 00:13:13,093 YEAH. MOVE ALONG. GO AWAY FROM THE FORGER. 369 00:13:13,126 --> 00:13:14,361 A FORGER HE MADE ME. 370 00:13:14,394 --> 00:13:17,097 ALL RIGHT. SO HE'S GOT A BILL OF SALE. 371 00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:18,832 IS THAT THE END OF IT? 372 00:13:18,866 --> 00:13:20,033 NO. 373 00:13:20,067 --> 00:13:21,601 NOW, MR. MONROE, I AM NOT GONNA HAVE YOU 374 00:13:21,634 --> 00:13:23,603 SELLING THIS JUNK ON THE STREET. 375 00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:24,905 JUNK?! 376 00:13:24,938 --> 00:13:26,106 JUNK! 377 00:13:26,139 --> 00:13:27,507 NOW, YOU GOTTA HAVE A PEDDLER'S LICENSE 378 00:13:27,540 --> 00:13:29,376 IN ORDER TO OPERATE IN MAYBERRY 379 00:13:29,409 --> 00:13:30,844 AND YOU DON'T HAVE ONE. 380 00:13:30,878 --> 00:13:33,246 SO, I WOULD SUGGEST THAT YOU JUST MOVE ON. 381 00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:34,581 OKAY. I'LL MOVE ON. 382 00:13:34,614 --> 00:13:37,317 BOY, I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU EXPECT A PLACE TO GROW 383 00:13:37,350 --> 00:13:39,386 IF YOU DON'T ENCOURAGE INDUSTRY. 384 00:13:39,419 --> 00:13:41,421 COME ON. GET IN THERE. LET'S GO. 385 00:13:41,454 --> 00:13:42,555 CAN'T GET A BREAK. 386 00:13:42,589 --> 00:13:43,924 WELL, I NAILED HIM. 387 00:13:43,957 --> 00:13:46,126 AN HOUR AFTER WE TOLD HIM TO BEAT IT 388 00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:48,361 HE WAS OUT THERE PEDDLING THAT JUNK. 389 00:13:48,395 --> 00:13:49,963 LOOK, IT WASN'T MY FAULT. 390 00:13:49,997 --> 00:13:51,564 IT WAS SO YOUR FAULT. 391 00:13:51,598 --> 00:13:53,133 YOU WERE TOLD TO BEAT IT. 392 00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:54,868 BARNEY, I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT. 393 00:13:54,902 --> 00:13:56,069 AS I WAS LEAVING 394 00:13:56,103 --> 00:13:57,871 THIS FELLA WANTED TO SEE MY MERCHANDISE. 395 00:13:57,905 --> 00:13:59,272 I ASK YOU, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? 396 00:13:59,306 --> 00:14:00,540 IS THAT SUPPOSED TO TAKE AN HOUR? 397 00:14:00,573 --> 00:14:01,909 HE WAS A CAREFUL BUYER. 398 00:14:01,942 --> 00:14:02,943 OH, YEAH? YEAH. 399 00:14:02,976 --> 00:14:04,111 YEAH? YEAH. 400 00:14:04,144 --> 00:14:05,178 HOLD IT, HOLD IT! 401 00:14:05,212 --> 00:14:06,313 BARNEY, I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT. 402 00:14:06,346 --> 00:14:07,347 ALL RIGHT. 403 00:14:07,380 --> 00:14:08,882 NOW, MR. MONROE, 404 00:14:08,916 --> 00:14:12,285 WE TOLD YOU TO LEAVE AND YOU DIDN'T GO. 405 00:14:12,319 --> 00:14:13,586 I GOT STOPPED. 406 00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:16,356 I GOT STOPPED BY A CUSTOMER, I TAKE AN OATH. 407 00:14:16,389 --> 00:14:18,558 I TOLD YOU BEFORE, I'M NOT GONNA STAND STILL 408 00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:20,560 WHILE YOU SELL THAT JUNK ON THE STREETS. 409 00:14:20,593 --> 00:14:22,662 NOW, YOU WERE PEDDLING WITHOUT A LICENSE. 410 00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:24,664 YOU'RE STILL PEDDLING WITHOUT A LICENSE 411 00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:26,633 AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO TELL YA. 412 00:14:26,666 --> 00:14:28,235 I'M GONNA HAVE TO BOOK YA. 413 00:14:28,268 --> 00:14:29,536 JAIL? YEAH, JAIL. 414 00:14:29,569 --> 00:14:31,939 COME ON, ANDY. LET'S GET HIM WRAPPED UP. 415 00:14:31,972 --> 00:14:33,006 BARNEY... 416 00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,141 HE CAN'T WAIT. 417 00:14:34,174 --> 00:14:36,944 NAME: NEWTON MONROE, RIGHT? 418 00:14:36,977 --> 00:14:37,978 RIGHT. 419 00:14:38,011 --> 00:14:39,246 AGE? 420 00:14:39,279 --> 00:14:40,247 THIRTY-FOUR. 421 00:14:41,248 --> 00:14:42,349 I KNOW, I LOOK 44 422 00:14:42,382 --> 00:14:44,251 BUT THAT'S WHAT WORRY CAN DO TO YOU. 423 00:14:44,284 --> 00:14:46,253 I SHOULD HAVE GONE TO NIGHT SCHOOL 424 00:14:46,286 --> 00:14:47,487 LIKE MY COUSIN GILBERT. 425 00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:49,022 HE'S A DENTAL TECHNICIAN. 426 00:14:49,056 --> 00:14:50,590 SMART? NAH-- BELOW AVERAGE-- 427 00:14:50,623 --> 00:14:52,993 BUT GILBERT, HE'S NEVER BEEN IN JAIL. 428 00:14:53,026 --> 00:14:54,928 I'M SORRY AS I CAN BE. 429 00:14:54,962 --> 00:14:57,931 YOU WERE PEDDLING WITHOUT A LICENSE. 430 00:14:57,965 --> 00:14:59,099 ADDRESS? 431 00:14:59,132 --> 00:15:00,100 WHAT ADDRESS? 432 00:15:00,133 --> 00:15:01,268 MY CAR. 433 00:15:01,301 --> 00:15:03,370 ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT. YOU'RE BOOKED. 434 00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:04,604 THAT'S A BREAK. 435 00:15:04,637 --> 00:15:07,274 COME TO TOWN, TRY TO DO A LITTLE BUSINESS. 436 00:15:07,307 --> 00:15:09,042 I WIND UP SITTING IN JAIL. 437 00:15:09,076 --> 00:15:10,510 YOU GOT ONE THING WRONG. 438 00:15:10,543 --> 00:15:13,113 YOU'RE NOT GONNA DO MUCH SITTIN'. 439 00:15:13,146 --> 00:15:14,281 ALL RIGHT, DIG! 440 00:15:14,314 --> 00:15:16,349 WHATEVER GAVE YOU THE IDEA 441 00:15:16,383 --> 00:15:18,685 OF PLANTING A TREE HERE, ANYWAY? 442 00:15:18,718 --> 00:15:20,587 NO TREE'S GONNA GROW HERE. 443 00:15:20,620 --> 00:15:22,022 JUST DIG, NEWTON. 444 00:15:22,055 --> 00:15:23,256 OH, THERE YA ARE. 445 00:15:23,290 --> 00:15:24,491 WHAT'S GOING ON? 446 00:15:24,524 --> 00:15:26,226 OH, PLANTING A TREE. 447 00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:28,295 HOW ARE YOU DOING, NEWTON? 448 00:15:28,328 --> 00:15:29,396 HOW AM I DOING? 449 00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:30,497 DIGGING A HOLE. 450 00:15:30,530 --> 00:15:32,365 HOW CAN YOU DO WITH A HOLE? 451 00:15:32,399 --> 00:15:33,566 A HOLE'S A HOLE. 452 00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:34,734 WELL, BE CAREFUL. 453 00:15:34,767 --> 00:15:36,569 THERE'S WATER PIPES AROUND HERE. 454 00:15:36,603 --> 00:15:37,570 DIG. 455 00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:39,306 AAH... 456 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:51,518 OH, NO, OF COURSE I'M NOT GONNA TELL YOU WHAT IT IS. 457 00:15:51,551 --> 00:15:52,752 IT'S A SURPRISE. 458 00:15:54,021 --> 00:15:55,422 YEAH... 459 00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:58,391 WELL, ALL I'LL SAY IS YOU NEVER HAD ANYTHING LIKE IT. 460 00:15:59,559 --> 00:16:02,329 OKAY. I'LL SEE YA ABOUT 8:00 THEN... 461 00:16:02,362 --> 00:16:05,698 UNLESS YOU WANT ME TO COME OVER EARLIER FOR SUPPER? 462 00:16:05,732 --> 00:16:07,034 OH, YOU'RE NOT. 463 00:16:09,169 --> 00:16:10,137 ALL RIGHT. 464 00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:11,338 OKAY. BYE-BYE. 465 00:16:12,539 --> 00:16:14,541 WHAT, DID YOU GET HER ANOTHER PRESENT? 466 00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:16,209 WELL, YEAH, JUST A TOKEN. 467 00:16:16,243 --> 00:16:17,544 YEAH. WHAT'D YOU GET HER? 468 00:16:17,577 --> 00:16:18,645 PINEAPPLE SKINNER. 469 00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:22,249 A PINEAPPLE SKINNER? 470 00:16:22,282 --> 00:16:24,284 YEAH, A PINEAPPLE SKINNER. 471 00:16:24,317 --> 00:16:25,318 WHERE'D YOU GET A PINEAPPLE SKINNER? 472 00:16:25,352 --> 00:16:26,319 FROM NEWTON. 473 00:16:26,353 --> 00:16:27,387 FROM NEWTON? 474 00:16:27,420 --> 00:16:28,455 WELL, I LOOKED ALL OVER 475 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:29,689 AND I COULDN'T FIND ANYTHING. 476 00:16:29,722 --> 00:16:34,294 THIS WAS ONLY TWO BUCKS. 477 00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:35,728 WHERE IS NEWTON? 478 00:16:35,762 --> 00:16:38,031 I GOT HIM DOWN IN THE BASEMENT, CLEANING THE FURNACE. 479 00:16:38,065 --> 00:16:40,200 DON'T YOU THINK YOU OUGHT TO LET UP ON HIM? 480 00:16:40,233 --> 00:16:41,801 YOU'VE BEEN WORKING HIM AWFUL HARD. 481 00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:43,036 WELL, SO WHAT? 482 00:16:43,070 --> 00:16:44,471 I'M TEACHING HIM A LESSON. 483 00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:46,639 HE'LL THINK TWICE BEFORE HE GOES DEFRAUDING 484 00:16:46,673 --> 00:16:49,209 OTHER INNOCENT PEOPLE, I'LL TELL YOU THAT. 485 00:16:49,242 --> 00:16:50,510 YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. 486 00:16:50,543 --> 00:16:52,779 OF COURSE, THERE IS ANOTHER ANGLE TO IT, TOO. 487 00:16:52,812 --> 00:16:54,181 YEAH 488 00:16:54,214 --> 00:16:56,149 HE'S COSTING US A LOT OF MONEY. 489 00:16:56,183 --> 00:16:58,085 THAT WATER PIPE ALONE COST $17 490 00:16:58,118 --> 00:16:59,486 AND HE DROPPED THE RADIO. 491 00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:02,222 I DON'T KNOW WHAT GEORGE IS GONNA CHARGE FOR THAT. 492 00:17:02,255 --> 00:17:03,523 YEAH, I KNOW. 493 00:17:03,556 --> 00:17:06,226 I THINK WE'D BE MONEY AHEAD IF WE LET HIM GO. 494 00:17:06,259 --> 00:17:07,660 NO. YOU CAN'T DO THAT, ANDY. 495 00:17:07,694 --> 00:17:09,629 WHAT KINDA JUSTICE WOULD THAT BE? 496 00:17:09,662 --> 00:17:13,100 YOU SENTENCED HIM TO FIVE DAYS, HE'S GOTTA SERVE FIVE DAYS. 497 00:17:13,133 --> 00:17:14,367 UH-HUH. 498 00:17:14,401 --> 00:17:16,836 COULD IT BE YOU'RE GETTING A LITTLE REVENGE? 499 00:17:16,869 --> 00:17:19,372 NO, OF COURSE NOT. 500 00:17:19,406 --> 00:17:20,407 UH-HUH. 501 00:17:21,641 --> 00:17:24,111 YOU SAID HE'S CLEANING THE FURNACE? 502 00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:25,512 HE KNOW HOW TO DO THAT? 503 00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:27,847 SURE. WHAT'S TO CLEANING A FURNACE? 504 00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:31,318 WELL, WHAT'S TO DIGGING A HOLE, BUT THAT COST US $17. 505 00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:33,353 NEWTON? 506 00:17:34,554 --> 00:17:35,555 HEY, NEWTON! 507 00:17:35,588 --> 00:17:36,589 WHAT? 508 00:17:36,623 --> 00:17:37,690 HOW YA DOIN'? 509 00:17:37,724 --> 00:17:40,227 FINE. JUST STARTING THE FIRE. 510 00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:43,096 WELL, BE SURE THE FLUE'S OPEN. 511 00:17:43,130 --> 00:17:44,231 THE WHAT? 512 00:17:44,264 --> 00:17:46,499 Andy: THE FLUE, THE FLUE! 513 00:17:46,533 --> 00:17:49,536 Newton: WHAT'S A FLUE? 514 00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:54,107 TURN IT OFF, NEWTON! TURN IT OFF! 515 00:17:54,141 --> 00:17:56,376 HURRY IT UP, NEWTON. 516 00:17:57,710 --> 00:17:59,579 I AM. 517 00:17:59,612 --> 00:18:02,515 WILL YOU GET OFF MY BACK? 518 00:18:02,549 --> 00:18:04,284 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 519 00:18:04,317 --> 00:18:06,319 YOU SPILLED THE BUCKET! 520 00:18:06,353 --> 00:18:07,320 IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. 521 00:18:07,354 --> 00:18:08,655 WATCH WHAT YOU'RE DOING. 522 00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:10,190 ALL RIGHT. STOP YELLING. 523 00:18:10,223 --> 00:18:12,659 IT'S ONLY A LITTLE BIT OF WATER. I'LL MOP IT UP. 524 00:18:17,864 --> 00:18:19,332 YOU'RE TOO MUCH, YOU KNOW THAT? 525 00:18:19,366 --> 00:18:20,567 CAN'T YOU DO ANYTHING RIGHT? 526 00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,402 CAN'T YOU DO ANYTHING IN THIS WORLD RIGHT? 527 00:18:22,435 --> 00:18:23,770 BARNEY... HE'S INEPT. 528 00:18:23,803 --> 00:18:26,139 STOP THAT. HE'S INEPT! I'VE HAD IT. 529 00:18:26,173 --> 00:18:28,141 HE'S ALL YOURS. HE'S JUST INEPT. 530 00:19:00,607 --> 00:19:01,608 UH... 531 00:19:02,975 --> 00:19:04,577 LISTEN, I DON'T, UH, 532 00:19:04,611 --> 00:19:06,413 I DON'T THINK BARNEY MEANT TO BE SO TOUGH ON YOU. 533 00:19:06,446 --> 00:19:08,481 I-I WOULDN'T PAY TOO MUCH ATTENTION 534 00:19:08,515 --> 00:19:10,750 TO WHAT HE... WHAT HE SAID. 535 00:19:10,783 --> 00:19:12,419 WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE? 536 00:19:12,452 --> 00:19:13,953 I'M A LOSER, THAT'S ALL. 537 00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:15,955 EVERYTHING I TOUCH GOES SOUR-- 538 00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:18,191 A BUCKET, A FURNACE, A HOLE... 539 00:19:18,225 --> 00:19:19,892 EVEN THE BUSINESS I BOUGHT. 540 00:19:19,926 --> 00:19:21,594 WHAT'S THE USE KIDDING? 541 00:19:21,628 --> 00:19:22,895 I'M A BORN LOSER. 542 00:19:22,929 --> 00:19:25,432 ALL YOU NEED IS A GOOD POSITIVE ATTITUDE 543 00:19:25,465 --> 00:19:27,300 AND YOU CAN DO SOMETHING ELSE. 544 00:19:27,334 --> 00:19:29,236 I MEAN IT. 545 00:19:31,304 --> 00:19:33,940 UH... 546 00:19:33,973 --> 00:19:36,843 I-I TELL YA WHAT. 547 00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:39,979 I GOT A JOB FOR YA. 548 00:19:40,012 --> 00:19:42,449 NOW, IT'S A HARD JOB, BUT I WANT YOU TO TRY. 549 00:19:42,482 --> 00:19:44,417 NOW, NOBODY WILL BE LOOKING AT YOU 550 00:19:44,451 --> 00:19:47,454 AND I WANT YOU TO TRY IT WITH A GOOD POSITIVE ATTITUDE. 551 00:19:47,487 --> 00:19:49,922 YOU'RE LETTING HIM PAINT THE PORCH OF YOUR HOUSE? 552 00:19:49,956 --> 00:19:51,558 YOU MUST BE LOONY. 553 00:19:51,591 --> 00:19:53,760 BEFORE I'D LET THAT GUY GET WITHIN A MILE OF MY HOUSE 554 00:19:53,793 --> 00:19:55,228 WITH A PAINTBRUSH, I'D... 555 00:19:55,262 --> 00:19:56,729 OH, NEWTON'S NOT A BAD GUY. 556 00:19:56,763 --> 00:19:58,698 HE'S JUST HAD A LOTTA TOUGH BREAKS. 557 00:19:58,731 --> 00:20:01,301 HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO DO ANY ACTUAL WORK. 558 00:20:01,334 --> 00:20:02,769 NEVER HAS DONE ANY. 559 00:20:02,802 --> 00:20:04,771 AND I THOUGHT I'D LEAVE HIM ALONE AND SEE IF HE CAN. 560 00:20:04,804 --> 00:20:06,573 YOU LEFT HIM ALONE OVER THERE, HUH? 561 00:20:06,606 --> 00:20:08,007 SURE. MAYBE HE'LL ESCAPE. 562 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:09,542 THAT'D BE THE BEST THING. 563 00:20:09,576 --> 00:20:10,643 OH, HE WON'T ESCAPE. 564 00:20:10,677 --> 00:20:12,679 YOU BEAT EVERYTHING, YOU KNOW THAT? 565 00:20:12,712 --> 00:20:14,681 YOU'RE THE ONE THAT BROUGHT HIM IN. 566 00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:15,715 YEAH, WELL... 567 00:20:17,750 --> 00:20:20,420 HI, NEWTON. HELLO. 568 00:20:21,788 --> 00:20:23,756 UH...HOW'D YOU DO? 569 00:20:23,790 --> 00:20:24,991 I DON'T KNOW. 570 00:20:25,024 --> 00:20:26,726 THE PAINT WAS TOO THICK 571 00:20:26,759 --> 00:20:29,496 AND WHEN I ADDED THE THINNER, IT GOT LIKE WATER. 572 00:20:29,529 --> 00:20:30,497 OH. 573 00:20:30,530 --> 00:20:32,031 WELL, I'M SURE YOU DID FINE. 574 00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:35,268 WE'LL TAKE A LOOK AT IT IN THE MORNING. 575 00:20:35,302 --> 00:20:36,503 OKAY... 576 00:20:36,536 --> 00:20:39,806 BUT DON'T EXPECT TOO MUCH. 577 00:20:42,375 --> 00:20:43,410 WELL... 578 00:20:43,443 --> 00:20:47,013 I GUESS WE BETTER GO, HUH, BARN? 579 00:20:47,046 --> 00:20:48,881 YEAH. SUITS ME. 580 00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:50,016 WELL... 581 00:20:52,319 --> 00:20:53,052 OH, NEWTON... 582 00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:55,322 YEAH? 583 00:20:55,355 --> 00:20:57,857 THE CELL DOOR'S OPEN AND THE KEYS ARE IN YOUR CAR. 584 00:20:57,890 --> 00:20:59,559 Andy: BARN! 585 00:21:11,638 --> 00:21:14,807 DID YOU EVER SEE A MESS LIKE THAT IN YOUR LIFE? 586 00:21:16,876 --> 00:21:22,415 WELL... 587 00:21:22,449 --> 00:21:25,452 WELL, THAT'S PRETTY BAD ALL RIGHT. 588 00:21:27,787 --> 00:21:30,390 WELL, I TOLD YA RIGHT FROM THE START 589 00:21:30,423 --> 00:21:31,691 HE CAN'T DO ANYTHING 590 00:21:31,724 --> 00:21:34,327 BUT YOU WANTED TO GET PSYCHOLOGICAL. 591 00:21:34,361 --> 00:21:36,396 YOU WANTED TO GIVE HIM CONFIDENCE. 592 00:21:36,429 --> 00:21:37,464 YEAH. 593 00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:41,634 TAKE A BRUSH. 594 00:21:41,668 --> 00:21:42,669 HUH? 595 00:21:42,702 --> 00:21:44,637 TAKE A BRUSH. 596 00:21:44,671 --> 00:21:45,705 HMM. 597 00:21:53,780 --> 00:21:55,815 I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. 598 00:21:59,919 --> 00:22:00,953 IT LOOKS GREAT! 599 00:22:00,987 --> 00:22:01,954 YEAH. 600 00:22:01,988 --> 00:22:02,989 I DID THAT? 601 00:22:03,022 --> 00:22:03,990 YEAH. 602 00:22:04,023 --> 00:22:05,625 OH, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. 603 00:22:05,658 --> 00:22:07,427 WELL, NOW, REMEMBER, NEWTON, 604 00:22:07,460 --> 00:22:09,596 WHEN YOU LEFT YESTERDAY, IT WAS STILL...STILL WET 605 00:22:09,629 --> 00:22:12,765 AND WHEN IT DRIES, IT KINDA SMOOTHES TOGETHER. 606 00:22:12,799 --> 00:22:13,833 YEAH. 607 00:22:13,866 --> 00:22:15,768 IT LOOKS GREAT, DON'T IT? 608 00:22:15,802 --> 00:22:17,136 YEAH. IT JUST SHOWS YA 609 00:22:17,169 --> 00:22:19,572 WHAT A LITTLE CONFIDENCE WILL DO. 610 00:22:19,606 --> 00:22:20,673 YEAH, YEAH. 611 00:22:20,707 --> 00:22:21,841 THAT'S GREAT. 612 00:22:21,874 --> 00:22:23,743 HOW CAN I THANK YOU? 613 00:22:23,776 --> 00:22:25,478 OH, LISTEN, DON'T THANK ME. 614 00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:26,746 DON'T THANK ME A BIT. 615 00:22:26,779 --> 00:22:29,081 I'M JUST GLAD YA KNOW YA GOT IT IN YA 616 00:22:29,115 --> 00:22:30,883 AND I GOT A SURPRISE FOR YA. 617 00:22:30,917 --> 00:22:32,952 I'M GONNA SUSPEND YOUR SENTENCE. 618 00:22:32,985 --> 00:22:35,955 OH, THAT'S GREAT. 619 00:22:37,424 --> 00:22:39,091 YOU KNOW SOMETHING? 620 00:22:39,125 --> 00:22:41,494 I'M GLAD I GOT ARRESTED. 621 00:22:53,205 --> 00:22:54,774 HI, SHERIFF, DEPUTY. 622 00:22:54,807 --> 00:22:56,142 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 623 00:22:56,175 --> 00:22:57,544 WHAT AM I DOING? 624 00:22:57,577 --> 00:22:58,911 THANKS TO YOU, I'M DOING IT. 625 00:22:58,945 --> 00:22:59,912 WHAT? 626 00:22:59,946 --> 00:23:01,448 SHERIFF, YOU GAVE ME 627 00:23:01,481 --> 00:23:02,982 THE CONFIDENCE I NEEDED. 628 00:23:03,015 --> 00:23:04,451 I FOUND OUT I'M NOT INEPT. 629 00:23:04,484 --> 00:23:05,652 I'M EPT. 630 00:23:05,685 --> 00:23:07,053 I DON'T HAVE TO BE A SALESMAN 631 00:23:07,086 --> 00:23:08,521 IF I DON'T WANT TO BE. 632 00:23:08,555 --> 00:23:10,189 I'M A PAINTER. 633 00:23:10,222 --> 00:23:11,658 HUH? YOU'RE A WHAT? 634 00:23:11,691 --> 00:23:12,859 YEAH. 635 00:23:12,892 --> 00:23:15,027 SHERIFF, I'M GOING TO PAINT 636 00:23:15,061 --> 00:23:17,897 THE COURTHOUSE FOR FREE. 637 00:23:23,970 --> 00:23:26,072 WELL, THAT'S TAKING QUITE A CHANCE, ANDY. 638 00:23:26,105 --> 00:23:27,674 THAT'S ALL I CAN TELL YOU. 639 00:23:27,707 --> 00:23:28,975 WHAT'S THE CHANCE? 640 00:23:29,008 --> 00:23:30,977 IF NEWTON DON'T DO WELL, WE'LL GET RID OF HIM. 641 00:23:31,010 --> 00:23:33,646 IT'S JUST A SIMPLE SELLING JOB IN A HARDWARE STORE. 642 00:23:33,680 --> 00:23:35,081 AND IT'S OVER IN MT. PILOT. 643 00:23:35,114 --> 00:23:37,817 HE'S OUT OF OUR HAIR. LET'S JUST FORGET ABOUT IT. 644 00:23:37,850 --> 00:23:40,119 HMM. WHAT'S THIS? 645 00:23:40,152 --> 00:23:42,755 COUPLE OF PACKAGES. 646 00:23:42,789 --> 00:23:44,591 ONE FOR YOU. 647 00:23:44,624 --> 00:23:46,793 "DEAR FRIENDS, YOU WERE SO NICE TO ME 648 00:23:46,826 --> 00:23:50,229 "THAT I THOUGHT I WOULD LIKE TO LEAVE A TOKEN OF MY GRATITUDE. 649 00:23:50,262 --> 00:23:52,198 GOODBYE AND GOOD LUCK. NEWTON." 650 00:23:52,231 --> 00:23:53,833 THAT'S NICE. YEAH. 651 00:23:53,866 --> 00:23:56,068 WHAT'D YOU GETS. LET'S SEE HERE. 652 00:23:56,102 --> 00:23:57,670 HMM. 653 00:23:57,704 --> 00:23:59,171 WHAT? 654 00:23:59,205 --> 00:24:01,674 OH, IT'S THAT PENCIL SHARPENER. 655 00:24:01,708 --> 00:24:02,875 OH, THAT'S NICE. 656 00:24:02,909 --> 00:24:04,911 WHAT'D YOU GET? 657 00:24:04,944 --> 00:24:06,613 A RAZOR, BATTERY OPERATED. 658 00:24:06,646 --> 00:24:07,814 OH. HUH. 659 00:24:07,847 --> 00:24:09,015 CAN I SEE THAT? 660 00:24:09,048 --> 00:24:10,683 YEAH. 661 00:24:10,717 --> 00:24:12,552 THAT'S A YAKIMOTO. 662 00:24:12,585 --> 00:24:13,753 YEAH. 663 00:24:13,786 --> 00:24:15,788 WORKS TOO. YEAH. 664 00:24:15,822 --> 00:24:18,491 YOU MIND? NO. GO AHEAD. 665 00:24:18,525 --> 00:24:21,160 OHHH! 43755

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