Original subtitles

Oh, I see how it is.

Yeah, it's called strategy.

Yeah, where I'm from it's called cheating.

Uh, you all right, Willow?

I swear, if they wrote a Broadway musical about me

it would be called "The Sound of Mucus."

Mine would be called, "Mama Mastectomy."

- Ooh. - More like,

"Thoroughly Mortal Millie."

That's a good one.

"The Phantom of the Operation."

Willow, how long have you had that cough?

Mine'd be, "Liver Let Die."

Liver-less.

Of course, that's a Bond film,

not a Broadway musical,

but unlike you, I'm cool with cheating.

- She's right. - Well, actually,

I was thinking of the Guns N' Roses song.

So, Max, what's your cancer musical?

What's the matter, Max? No jokes today?

Where's your sense of tumor?

Synced & corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com

Thank you, Andre. That was so brave.

Nice connecting.

Lauren, how about you?

I know that you're still getting acclimated

but we would love to hear from you.

Your friend just visited?

Maybe you want to talk about how that made you feel?

No.

But, um, thank you.

Maybe at evening group.

Have a beautiful morning, everyone.

- Thanks for sharing, Andre. - Good session.

Way to go.

Yeah, hi. Come in. It's Martin.

No, babe, I hear what you're saying loud and clear

but she needs to try new things, all right?

And plus, literally, there's nothing cooler

that a kid could do.

Yes, or an adult. You got me, okay?

But she is going.

Yes, I'll call you later. Love you.

Husbands, am I right?

Anyway, sorry about the mess. Me and Sameera are going

for a sleep over at the Museum of Natural History later

and I am so excited.

I visited Lauren in rehab.

Okay.

Well, that happened.

I shouldn't have done that.

Yeah.

How was she?

I don't know. She wouldn't even

look at me, man, just...

and then she just told me to leave.

Well, you invaded her privacy.

Yeah, but, come on. I'm her friend.

Yeah, but you may remind her

of an environment that's toxic.

- You understand? - Toxic?

The hospital. This... this place.

All the stress that it caused her.

Oh, yeah.

Besides, the first few days in rehab are a huge transition.

- You shouldn't have... - I thought you were

supposed to be a good listener.

Do... ugh.

You know what, if you want me to stand here and make you

feel better about doing something that I

strongly advised you not to, I'm not going to.

Because the person that I'm concerned about

right now is Lauren. Not you.

What? Really?

The old saved-by-the-page? Huh? That old chestnut?

Ten year old boy status post heart transplant

now with respiratory arrest

during the Pope's procession down 5th.

Trauma one.

126, 150/92, and 22.

0-2 sat 92 on 100% non rebreather.

Jimmy, your parents are right behind you, okay?

- And I'm here. - Oh, good. Jump in.

Jimmy, we're right here.

Ten years old. Recent heart transplant.

0-2 sats still in low 90s.

Push another 10 milligrams of Lasix.

Jimmy, everything's gonna be okay. Just keep breathing, okay?

His lungs are filled with fluid.

Heart failure?

Most likely secondary acute rejection,

which we need a left ventricular biopsy to confirm.

Why is he rejecting the transplant?

God only knows.

Good morning, Mr. Brandt.

Oh, okay.

Uh...

Oh, sorry.

You know how young women are sex positive

and everything nowadays.

Yes.

I understand you're under a protocol at Baptist?

- Yeah, for colon cancer. - Stage 3.

Worst 18 months of my life.

Of course, until I met this gorgeous woman.

So what would you like me to do for you?

Well, it's pretty simple.

I want this thing removed.

Well, that thing is how they administer

your chemotherapy drugs for your colon cancer.

I'm not interested in that either.

He wants to stop the chemo.

Have you discussed that with your oncologist

- over at Baptist because... - Look, look.

Can you take the catheter out or not?

But the treatment is prolonging your life.

It... it might be,

but I'm certain as hell not living.

Tethered to a hospital, dragged down by drugs.

I'd rather spend some time traveling

with this young woman.

Well, all my patients would rather be doing something

besides chemotherapy, but it's vital

in order to treat the disease.

Haven't you ever been in love?

What wouldn't you give for just a little

bit more of it?

Meeting with Brennan from HCC at 9:00.

Uh, maintenance review panel at 10:00,

Morbidity and Mortality conference at 11:00.

I have a sense of humor, right?

I don't find you funny but that's mainly because

most of your decisions ruin my life.

Ah.

You owe a call to the head of the board

about year-end budgets, and you're meeting Georgia

for birthing class at 1:30.

- Can you push it? - Yeah, okay.

- That was funny. - What? No, it wasn't a joke.

I just... I'm not really in the push-push mood today.

Hmm. Yeah, because birthing class is all about your mood.

It's the... you know, I don't know.

It's like, something about joking about death

that's just not to me very funny.

You know, as much as I'd love to keep talking to you

about your sense of humor

do you remember speaking to the Secret Service a few weeks ago?

Maybe, but if I told ya I'd have to kill ya.

Don't give up your day job.

Come on, that was funny.

- They're in your office. - Ugh.

Hm. Uh, Max Goodwin, Medical Director.

Welcome to New Amsterdam.

Thank you. I am Cardinal Mancini.

- Hi. - This is agent Hayes

and agent Larson...

- How you doing? - From the Secret Service.

Cool.

You know why we're here?

Uh, ye... uh, yeah, no.

The Pope is addressing the UN this afternoon.

Right, the Pope is addressing the... right.

- Yeah, I remember. - Ah, yes.

And as Papal Security Liaison,

it falls to me to secure

your presidential bay in case of an emergency,

God forbid.

Sure. Uh, great. Well, I'm happy to help.

You need the presidential bay?

- Yes, sir. - And surrounding floors.

Ah, yes. And the surrounding floors.

Well, I don't love the sound of surrounding floors.

This is a working hospital.

- It's a precaution. - And merely formality.

You'll hardly tell we're here.

- Please make room. - Excuse us.

Let's go, let's go. Keep it moving.

All the way to the end of the hall, please.

- Behind you. - Let's go, let's go.

Keep moving, please.

Hate to say this, but I can kinda tell you're here.

Let's see.

I'm not seeing any significant scarring.

It would be a very mild surgery.

Let her rip.

Before we let her rip I need to make sure

that you're absolutely certain

that you wanna end your chemotherapy.

Never more sure of anything.

Okay. Well, while we wait

for your records to be sent over

from Baptist, we can schedule the procedure,

and then we'll take it from...

- Dr. Sharpe. - Lila, I'm with a patient.

I'm sorry, I tried to tell them.

- Tell who? - Yeah, she's the one.

Ma'am, I'm gonna have to ask you a few questions.

- I haven't done anything. - Don't you touch her! Sheila!

- Come on, let's go. - Sorry, excuse me.

- What's going on, please? - Hi, I'm Carl Jimenez.

I'm Mr. Brandt's legal guardian.

That woman kidnapped him.

Gentlemen?

We have received a credible death threat

against the Pope from within this hospital.

Security will need to be heightened.

Uh, sorry. Wait, who here would threaten the Pope?

As it turns out, one of your doctors.

Dr. Vijay Kapoor.

It's not as simple as whether I did

or did not try to kill the Pope.

How could it possibly not be that simple?

Dr. Kapoor coated the bed

in the presidential bay with a known poison.

Sorry, poison?

It was oleander petals!

- Which are poisonous. - But it was a gift.

It represents heart chakra. The Pope has a big heart.

Yeah, Vijay, couldn't you just

have given the Pope a normal gift?

I would have, but what do you give someone

who lives in the Vatican?

Pope is a man of peace.

He supports women's rights and gay people.

And I heard a rumor that he sneaks out of the Vatican

disguised to help to feed the poor people.

As you can see, Dr. Kapoor made an innocent mistake.

He loves the Pope.

- I love the Pope. - Loves him.

Your background check came back clear.

So he can go, right?

- I'll check. - Great, thank you.

I mean, if I actually wanted to kill the Pope

I would have used white snakeroot petals.

- Mm-hmm. - Excuse me?

Yeah, it's faster and untraceable.

That's exactly what killed

Abraham Lincoln's mother, you know.

Take a seat, please, Dr. Kapoor.

What?

You're on your own, pal.

Please take a seat.

So, uh, Jimmy's heart biopsy results

show signs of acute rejection

and that's why your son collapsed.

Well, is he gonna be all right?

Well, I've increased his immunosuppressants

and that should treat this episode but we need to find out

why it happened in the first place.

Now were there any changes in his diet?

Any rashes, colds, or upset stomach?

Hm.

Well, can you think of anything different?

Like, anything out of the ordinary?

Mrs. Corrigan?

Our insurance paid for the transplant,

but they didn't pay for any of the post op medications.

Doesn't make any sense.

The pills, they cost over $9,000 a month.

Our church held a fundraiser, but it wasn't enough.

Okay. And?

We, uh, started

spreading out the pills.

Like,

just giving him one every other day.

We were trying to make them last.

Um... that's what made Jimmy sick.

We did this.

Well, I mean...

it's real easy to blame yourselves.

That's not going to make Jimmy better, okay?

We just need to make sure that it never happens again.

All right?

But it will.

We can't afford the pills.

What are we supposed to do?

I'm just doing my job. Walter's living will

specifically states any and all known

medical treatments should be explored.

Okay. But Sheila?

You can't honestly think that that sweet lady's a kidnapper.

She removed him from his residence

- and ran away with him. - They're in love.

Look, I'm just trying to protect Walter

from the story I see all the time.

An older man, alone, vulnerable,

- meets a younger woman... - She's 75.

25 or 75, she wants him to stop his cancer treatment.

Now, I've been granted his healthcare decisions

because frankly, his healthcare proxy was asleep at the wheel.

So here I am doing the best I can.

I can appreciate that.

So, tell me.

Is stopping treatment in Walter's best interest?

Medically, no.

But I have to respect the patient's wishes.

Well, legally, you have to respect my wishes.

And even though Walt's a pain in the ass,

I'm just trying to keep him alive.

He's trying to kill me.

If it were left up to Carl

I would be alone, rotting in my apartment,

having the life drained out of me.

He's doing what he thinks is best.

He thinks Sheila pushed me.

The whole thing was my idea.

Unfortunately the law may not see it that way.

I don't have a lot of time left on this Earth.

And the law won't let me live the way I want to.

That ain't right.

Maybe there is something that we can do.

Get the law on our side.

- Yo, Max! - How can I help?

Change the fundamental idiocracy

- of American healthcare? - I'm working on it.

I've got this kid, just had a heart transplant,

family can't afford the post op meds.

What's their financial profile?

Married, stable.

Dad's a security guard who pulls in about 45K a year.

Too much to qualify for Medicaid.

Or the Community Care Fund.

Well, we can help them in the short term

but they need a long term solution.

Working class, just caught in the middle.

Maybe not.

Um...

You could get a divorce.

Is this a joke?

Look, if Patricia is a single mom with no income,

she and Jimmy could qualify for Medicaid.

And Medicaid would cover the cost of Jimmy's medication.

But we love each other.

Well, no one's questioning that.

And as Catholics we don't even believe in divorce.

You can't ask us to break something that's unbreakable.

- I... I can't even... - I'm sorry.

It's just, uh, the system is flawed.

And so is the solution, but I can't think of a better one.

Get divorced, save your son.

What happened?

I don't know, I just got the page.

Heart rate 140. BP 90 over palp.

- Respiratory rate 22. - She collapsed at work.

EMS just dropped off. Any history of infection?

No, none.

She's tachy, hypotensive, warm to the touch.

- Sepsis? - She has a hot, red,

macular rash around her j-tube.

- Cellulitis. - Looks like it.

That's preventable. Helen, your people let her

walk out with an infection? Who's next?

Max, I paged you here as her friend, not as her doctor.

Let's get her to Trauma One!

I've got this under control.

Do you?

I'm gonna give you a minute to think about what you just said.

- Max. - Hm?

- Birthing class? - I'll be there.

Okay.

How is she?

She's stable, but not out of the woods.

Yeah. She was coughing this morning but there was

- no indication... - Setbacks happen.

You're calling sepsis a setback?

Is this your way of apologizing?

She was laughing at her symptoms.

This morning in chemo. Everyone was laughing,

and I couldn't done something.

I could've gotten someone.

She was laughing at her symptoms.

She was laughing because of her symptoms, Max.

There's a difference.

One, two, three, four, five.

No.

Five, four, three, two, one?

No.

Can you think of any other five digit password?

As soon as I scan your email you're free to go.

I want to help you but I rarely use email.

Honestly, I thought it was a passing trend.

What do you use?

A cup of tea and a conversation.

Is... is it your back that's bothering you?

Maybe I can help.

You wanna help?

Remember your password.

Hello, John Wilkes Booth.

I warned you not to do it, didn't I?

- Ha. - You did?

Yeah. Hell yeah, I did, because it was idiotic.

You mean you knew about this little stunt

and you decided not to report it?

Yeah... no.

Er... no, wait. What?

Take a seat, please.

No, no, no, I gotta...

That's a joke, right? You're kidding?

I'm not known for my sense of humor.

Do you know my password?

The ICU is a secured area, sir.

Sure it is, and you're doing a hell of a job,

but, uh, I'm late for a birthing class

and this way's faster so I'm just gonna

go ahead and, uh, okay.

That's my ICU, right? And I'm really late

so I'm just gonna go ahead and walk through it right now.

So you can just

step aside.

Go ahead and just step...

Yeah.

Did I mention I have cancer?

When you find out that you have cancer,

it's the worst moment.

Everything is chaos and...

and fear.

When adult protection services petitioned to have Mr. Brandt

become a ward of the state,

he had just got his cancer diagnosis.

He was unraveling.

But then Walter met Sheila.

And since he's been with Sheila, he's happy

and taken care of.

Will love cure Walter? No.

But it will heal him in other ways.

Mr. Jimenez, do you have a response?

I do, Your Honor.

The decision to deem Mr. Brandt an incapacitated person

was not made lightly.

- Now... - Come on.

Mr. Brandt, this is for your benefit.

You're petitioning to get your rights back.

Please let Mr. Jimenez finish.

I'm sorry.

Look, I didn't want to go there,

But of the five speeding tickets Walter got last year,

one of them was near a school.

His hoarding caused a small fire in his apartment.

And then Walter got aggressive with his healthcare attendant

when she tried to help him clean up.

That's why the state stepped in.

You believe he's a danger to himself and to others?

I do, Your Honor.

Hey there.

Can we talk for a minute?

I just wanted to check in.

I know we hit you with a crazy idea.

We were just trying to help you duck some red tape.

Our marriage isn't red tape.

I realize that.

When Neil and I got married, we made a promise

to our family, to our friends, to God.

It was a divine pact to each other.

That's a... it's a real promise.

Marriage is forever.

I... I can't even imagine.

Neil is our rock.

- Look, Mrs. Corrigan... - I won't abandon my family.

It'd just be on paper.

"Render unto Ceasar," that sort of thing.

There has to be another way.

We'd lose our community.

We wouldn't be able to receive the Eucharist.

I understand,

but is that worth more than your son's life?

Hey, maybe we could get remarried.

You know, when Jimmy's off his medications.

Unfortunately, Jimmy will be on meds

for the rest of his life.

This is forever?

I don't see any other way around it.

Then we'll do it.

Inhale.

And exhale.

Okay, moms.

Put all your weight on your partner.

Inhale.

And sway.

Good.

Doesn't that feel good?

- You okay? - Hm?

If this is too much, we can stop.

No, yeah, I'm good. I'm swaying.

- Sorry. - All right.

Okay, now guide Mom down to her pillow.

And moms, this is the best part.

Foot massage.

This is great if you have a headache.

And who remembers the one place not to massage?

Ankles.

Everyone, this is Max, the Medical Director.

Yeah, I got a follow up question.

Why are we giving foot massages when we should

be discussing postpartum hemorrhaging,

which is the number one cause of maternal mortality?

Not... not a joke.

- Max... - What?

Rest assured that hemorrhaging

is very rare, okay?

Yeah, rare, but 5% of births

and double that for Caesareans and I mean,

if Mom does have a headache

that could be preeclampsia or any number of...

- Max, stop it. - Sorry, sorry.

Just, um... there's a lot that could...

go wrong.

Sorry.

So you have your settlement agreement.

We'll take it to the judge for questioning.

It'll take a while before your divorce becomes official,

so when you go home we'll make sure that we send you

with enough meds to cover Jimmy until the Medicaid kicks in.

As long as Jimmy's okay.

That's what's important.

Where is he?

Jimmy couldn't have gone far.

Sepsis in oncology, missing patients...

this isn't supposed to happen here at New Amsterdam.

Well, it's still a hospital, Max.

People get sick, scared, or...

- Don't say it. - Die.

Dude, I just said, "Don't say it."

Why... I literally... oh, my God.

- Seriously? - Agents, have you seen

a ten year old boy, straight brown hair

- in the last thirty minutes? - I have not.

Hm. Right. Of course you haven't.

Can I just ask, what have you seen?

4 orderlies, 12 patients, 9 doctors, 17 nurses,

a janitor, and 2 pregnant couples

looking for building D.

3 couples.

Wow. Yeah, since the Pope

probably isn't coming today...

How about you and a few of your guys

help us out in another way?

Scent.

Good dog.

Good dog.

Can we go now, please?

My supervisor wants you to stay put

until the Pope leaves the city.

Till...

come on, come on!

Till the Pope leaves the city?

Do we... do we look like Pope assassins to you?

He doesn't even know where his glasses are

and they're on top of his head.

Right? I'm a pacifist.

I can't even swat a fly.

We should all have

a nice cup of tea.

Tea? Martin and Sameera are on

their way here right now. We're gonna miss

the sleepover at the Natural History Museum

and you're talking to me about tea?

It's cinnamon spice.

I do love cinnamon spice.

The Museum of Natural History

must be so creepy at night.

Yeah, well, you must be so creepy at night.

You know, with those all dead animals with their eyes.

My Rohan never liked to go there as a child.

It's creepy.

No, it's not. It's magical, it's wonderful,

and it's educational. The trifecta.

You're not listening.

No, you guys are having a different conversation than I am, clearly.

- Ah, Jesus! - What's the matter?

- Scalding hot. - Uh, no, actually, it's kinda

the perfect temperature.

Ah, my leg's on fire.

Have you been experiencing strange sensation in your leg?

Tingling.

On and off.

Is it better after work hours?

How did you know?

You have meralgia paresthetica.

- It's caused by your gun. - My gun?

Yeah, it's pressing on your lateral

femoral cutaneous nerve.

If you switch to a shoulder holster,

your symptoms should go away.

Thank you.

So let me ask you something. In your line of work,

do a lot of assassins stop to diagnose

strangers with nerve disorders?

Dr. Sharpe, like you, I do believe in love.

But love doesn't change the law.

The law grants Mr. Jimenez the right to determine

the medical decisions for Mr. Brandt

Unless you have anything else to present.

I don't, Your Honor.

Then I'm afraid to say we're done.

Legal guardianship remains with Mr. Jimenez.

Thank you, Your Honor.

Walt.

Let's get you home.

What are you doing?

Hiding.

Huh. If I thought I could

get back up I would join you.

You got a family?

I'm mad at 'em.

Yeah.

Authority figures.

I'm mad at them too.

I wish I was old.

I wish I was young.

Found them.

Oh, honey. We were so worried about you.

Are you going to live in different houses?

No.

Will you still love each other?

Of course.

But you're gonna go to hell.

Jimmy.

It... it's not that simple.

Divorce is a sin. Sister Frances said so.

She said sinning isn't cool.

Is she wrong?

No, she's right. Sinning isn't cool.

So you'll go to hell and I'll go to heaven

and not be with you

forever.

- Hi. - Hi.

- It's an ambush. - I see that.

So are we kicked out of foot massage class?

No but there were a lot of people googling

preeclampsia and hyperventilating.

Well, hyperventilating is kinda like Lamaze,

so good practice, right?

Sorry.

Not funny.

Kind of off my game today.

- What is going on, babe? - Ah, it's nothing.

- I should get back to work. - Max.

Okay, it's just that... I mean,

foot massages?

And standing squats, and, uh...

uh, changing doll diapers.

The focus of that class is just way off.

Babe, the focus of that class is managing labor.

The focus of that class is situations

that you could handle with an epidural

when what you need to focus on

is getting ready. I mean you... you need to get...

You need to get ready.

Just in case.

- In case of what? - In case I'm not there.

I might not be able to

carry your weight, or

help you change positions, or bring you ice chips.

I might not be in there at all. You understand?

That is what you need to think about.

That is what you need to get ready for.

I know.

And I do.

Every day.

- Yeah, but you don't... - I don't what?

I don't have public outbursts?

I don't rail about maternal death rates?

No, I don't.

Then how do you...

I...

I look around.

At everything that I have.

And I focus on that.

And if it goes?

Then it goes.

But it's not gone yet,

you hear me?

- You're not gone yet. - Mm-hmm.

There's no improvement yet but she is a tough cookie.

Not that cancer cares.

Why was she laughing?

You should hear some of their jokes.

I mean, they used to name their tumors.

I believe Willow's was Arnold, as in,

"It's not a tum-ah."

That's pretty good.

But it is a tumor.

Grace comes in many forms.

Hm.

You would have been proud of me today.

- Yeah? - Yeah, I pulled a Max.

How? Had multiple panic attacks in the hospital,

frightened pregnant women, encouraged sin?

- No. - Mm.

No, I, um...

I got way more involved

with a patient than I should have.

Feels good, doesn't it?

Not when it doesn't work out.

Yeah.

Um, sorry to interrupt.

Dr. Sharpe, can we talk about Walter's next steps?

Yeah.

The first thing we have to do is get Walter back to Mt. Zion.

- Uh, Baptist. - What?

No, no. He's at, um...

Oh. Baptist.

Yeah, you're right. Sorry.

How many are you taking care of?

Wards of the state? Um, ten?

Seems rather a lot.

Well, it is, but I wish I could take on more.

There are so many seniors out there alone.

No husband or wife, no children.

And the ones like Walter, they require

even more time and attention.

Even more care.

You mean like that?

Yeah, like that.

I have an idea.

Well, this is one for the books.

You want me to terminate his guardianship?

Yes, Your Honor.

The ruling that I just confirmed in your favor?

Yes, Your Honor.

Can I ask why?

Actually, it was Dr. Sharpe's idea.

But there is one condition.

One condition?

If Mr. Jimenez is not going to be

Mr. Brandt's guardian, who will?

His wife.

I didn't realize you were married, Mr. Brandt.

That's the one condition.

All I want is for someone to look out for Walter.

Someone with his best interests at heart.

And I accept.

Me too.

Dr. Goodwin, grazie.

I apologize for any inconvenience.

Oh, it's no inconvenience at all.

Actually, that's not true. It was a lot of inconvenience.

If there is any way I can express my gratitude,

just let me know.

Mm.

Actually...

Hm?

There is.

- Dr. Reynolds? - Oh, just in time.

Hey, guys. Uh, Jimmy, I'd like you to meet someone.

This is Cardinal Mancini, the Pope's right hand man.

The Pope?

Mm-hmm.

It's a great honor, Cardinal, sir.

We're big fans.

I talked to His Holiness about your predicament.

The Pope says it's cool.

You guys will not believe

- what I just went through. - Iggy.

All right, so if we're gonna make the flashlight tour

of the museum we gotta get going.

- Put that away. - Ooh, hang on a second.

What? What is it?

She doesn't want to go.

What are you talking about?

Of course she wants to go. That's what

we talked about. We're going, right?

- Put that stuff away. - Iggy, Iggy.

Stop talking and listen.

Okay.

Wanna tell him what you told me?

Okay, come on. Come on, bug.

You gotta tell me what's going on. What's wrong?

The museum is scary.

The museum is not scary, it's a museum.

And you told me that you wanted to go, right?

'Cause you wanted to go.

I... I just, uh...

I...

You know, I just... I wanna share all the things

that I loved the most with you because that's my favorite part

about being your dad.

But maybe sometimes I'm not the... the best listener.

Even though that is technically my job.

Maybe sometimes at home you don't get the best of me.

I'm sorry. I always want you to have the best of me.

Okay?

What do you think? Hug?

You're in? Come here. Meet me half way.

Get up here. Oh, my gosh you get so big.

- Can I get in on that? - Of course.

Mmm.

Does anyone else wanna speak?

All right, then.

I'll see you guys tomorrow morning.

I messed up.

Uh...

I was in trouble and...

instead of asking for help...

I just pushed everyone away.

I didn't think I had any friends left.

I thought, well,

I ruin all my relationships.

And I was wondering...

Why even bother recovering, you know?

Why not let myself sink deeper down the hole?

Didn't think I had anything left.

I have nothing to go back to.

But then, um...

the other night, uh...

a friend of mine came to visit and...

I'm just really grateful that he did.

Thank you.

Out of the night that covers me,

black as the pit from pole to pole

I thank whatever gods may be for my unconquerable soul.

No!

What have you done with my daughter?

Jeez. Feels like I walked into

the final scene of "Miss Saigon."

We were worried about you, hon.

Yeah, you scared us.

Yeah, we, um... for a minute there

we thought you were "Croaklahoma."

Oh, my...

Oh, that's twisted, man. I love it.

You know, you also could have gone with "Oaklymphoma."

See that's good. That's better.

Or "A Little Night Mucus."

"Fiddler on the Puke"? Does that work?

- Ew. - It's good.

Why is it ew? Why is that ew?

"Catch me if you Cancer."

"The King and Eye Cancer."

Very specific.

Good one, Mike. An actual musical.

So "Anything Ghosts" is a pretty good one.

"Anything Ghosts!"

Uh, "Gurney Boys."

It's a good one. That's a good one.

How about this?