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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:17,809 --> 00:00:19,978 [woman speaking Russian] 2 00:00:20,311 --> 00:00:22,313 [women panting] 3 00:00:26,568 --> 00:00:28,987 [woman continues speaking Russian] 4 00:00:46,212 --> 00:00:48,506 [water running] 5 00:01:00,518 --> 00:01:01,936 [speaking Russian] 6 00:01:05,190 --> 00:01:06,649 - [laughs] - [knocking] 7 00:01:17,327 --> 00:01:19,204 - [whistle blows] - [speaking Russian] 8 00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:27,796 [instructor calls out] 9 00:01:27,879 --> 00:01:30,465 - [group murmuring] - [instructor stammers] 10 00:01:30,548 --> 00:01:31,548 [shouts] 11 00:01:35,720 --> 00:01:37,722 - [shouts] - [gasps] 12 00:01:37,806 --> 00:01:39,724 [group screaming] 13 00:01:44,229 --> 00:01:45,939 [groaning] 14 00:01:52,028 --> 00:01:54,114 [screaming] 15 00:01:57,158 --> 00:01:59,160 [wailing] 16 00:01:59,244 --> 00:02:02,038 - [panting] - [group murmurs] 17 00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:04,791 [groans] 18 00:02:06,251 --> 00:02:07,919 [men speaking Russian] 19 00:02:08,461 --> 00:02:09,671 [young woman wails] 20 00:02:14,008 --> 00:02:15,468 [panting] 21 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:18,346 - [baby crying] - [indistinct chatter in Russian] 22 00:02:22,225 --> 00:02:26,229 [narrator] On the 12th hour of the first day of October 1989, 23 00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:29,232 43 women around the world gave birth. 24 00:02:29,315 --> 00:02:31,192 This was unusual only in the fact 25 00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:35,155 that none of these women had been pregnant when the day first began. 26 00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:40,994 Sir Reginald Hargreeves, eccentric billionaire and adventurer, 27 00:02:41,077 --> 00:02:44,914 resolved to locate and adopt as many of the children as possible. 28 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:46,332 Extraordinary! 29 00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:52,380 How much do you want for it? 30 00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:53,923 [Reginald speaking Russian] 31 00:02:58,803 --> 00:03:02,182 ["Picture Book" by The Kinks playing] 32 00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:06,644 ♪ Picture yourself When you're getting old ♪ 33 00:03:10,815 --> 00:03:14,319 ♪ Sat by the fireside a-pondering on ♪ 34 00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:20,491 ♪ Picture book ♪ 35 00:03:20,575 --> 00:03:24,454 ♪ Pictures of your mama Taken by your papa ♪ 36 00:03:24,537 --> 00:03:28,082 ♪ A long time ago Long time ago ♪ 37 00:03:28,416 --> 00:03:31,127 ♪ Long time ago Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 38 00:04:00,865 --> 00:04:04,369 [playing "The Phantom of the Opera"] 39 00:04:16,756 --> 00:04:18,424 [alarm beeping] 40 00:04:20,218 --> 00:04:21,386 [man groans] 41 00:04:27,558 --> 00:04:29,185 - [grunts] - [floorboards creaking] 42 00:04:31,145 --> 00:04:33,564 - [buttons click] - [machine buzzing] 43 00:05:05,013 --> 00:05:07,765 [guitar, bass, and drums join song] 44 00:05:08,182 --> 00:05:10,143 - [glass shatters] - [man groans] 45 00:05:10,226 --> 00:05:12,562 [man] Show me where the safe is, or your family's dead! 46 00:05:13,062 --> 00:05:14,731 - Where's the safe? - [family whimpering] 47 00:05:14,814 --> 00:05:16,399 [man 2] Just leave us alone! 48 00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:20,653 [weatherman on TV] ...little bit of rain potentially, later in the week. 49 00:05:21,654 --> 00:05:22,654 [man 3 yelps] 50 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:24,407 - [neck cracks] - [thuds] 51 00:05:26,909 --> 00:05:27,785 [man 4 grunting] 52 00:05:27,869 --> 00:05:29,120 [man 5] Who is this guy? 53 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,085 [both grunting] 54 00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:37,962 [violin solo playing] 55 00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:43,384 [camera shutters clicking] 56 00:05:43,801 --> 00:05:45,678 [crowd clamoring] 57 00:05:48,139 --> 00:05:49,599 [man] Over here, over here! 58 00:05:59,942 --> 00:06:01,736 There's our sweetheart, Allison! 59 00:06:10,661 --> 00:06:11,788 [woman] Oh! You're perfect! 60 00:06:13,539 --> 00:06:15,583 [playing "Angel of Music"] 61 00:06:18,002 --> 00:06:19,212 [sighs] 62 00:06:20,421 --> 00:06:22,507 Hey, you, stay strong. 63 00:06:22,590 --> 00:06:24,217 I believe in you. Okay? 64 00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:25,468 You, not so much. 65 00:06:25,551 --> 00:06:26,594 [both chuckle] 66 00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:28,304 [man] Bye, Klaus. 67 00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:36,562 We'll see you soon, Klaus. 68 00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:42,360 - [attendant] Stay sober. - Mm. 69 00:07:08,928 --> 00:07:11,848 - [radio beeps] - [automated voice] Incoming transmission. 70 00:07:32,827 --> 00:07:34,745 [woman speaking indistinctly over TV] 71 00:07:34,829 --> 00:07:36,706 [Diego] Your family is safe now. 72 00:07:36,789 --> 00:07:40,209 - [violin playing "Think of Me"] - [news fanfare plays on TV] 73 00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:46,007 [man on TV] We're going now live to a breaking story. 74 00:07:48,217 --> 00:07:50,178 - [man] One more! - [man 2] Allison, here! 75 00:07:50,261 --> 00:07:52,013 - [indistinct chatter] - [shutters clicking] 76 00:07:53,097 --> 00:07:54,932 [man 3] Al... Allison, Allison! 77 00:07:55,433 --> 00:07:57,810 - Allison! - Allison! Have you heard the news? 78 00:07:58,019 --> 00:08:00,062 When was the last time you saw your father? 79 00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:02,190 Have you heard from your brothers? 80 00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:06,194 [woman] Allison, will you wear Valentino to the funeral? 81 00:08:06,277 --> 00:08:07,653 [reporters clamoring] 82 00:08:10,072 --> 00:08:11,908 [police siren wails] 83 00:08:21,125 --> 00:08:22,251 [smooches] 84 00:08:23,252 --> 00:08:25,296 - [siren wailing] - [music fades] 85 00:08:25,588 --> 00:08:27,548 [rock version of "The Music of the Night" playing] 86 00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:28,758 [gasps] 87 00:08:32,428 --> 00:08:34,430 [panting, laughs] 88 00:08:36,807 --> 00:08:37,808 [sighs] 89 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:42,438 [whoops] 90 00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:44,273 [news fanfare plays] 91 00:08:48,569 --> 00:08:49,570 [man on TV] Moments ago, 92 00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:51,656 police reported the death of the most eccentric 93 00:08:51,739 --> 00:08:53,157 and reclusive billionaire. 94 00:09:04,085 --> 00:09:05,419 [stops playing abruptly] 95 00:09:21,894 --> 00:09:23,229 [indistinct chatter] 96 00:09:24,772 --> 00:09:26,774 [horn blaring in distance] 97 00:09:39,870 --> 00:09:42,248 [inaudible] 98 00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:44,041 Dad... 99 00:11:54,338 --> 00:11:55,338 Hey, Mom. 100 00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:00,969 Mom? 101 00:12:04,265 --> 00:12:05,391 [Allison] Vanya? 102 00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:07,810 You're actually here. 103 00:12:08,602 --> 00:12:09,645 [chuckles softly] 104 00:12:10,312 --> 00:12:12,231 - Hey, Allison. - Hey, sis. 105 00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:20,740 [chuckles softly] 106 00:12:23,075 --> 00:12:25,077 [Diego] Ah. What is she doing here? 107 00:12:25,494 --> 00:12:27,705 You don't belong here. Not after what you did. 108 00:12:27,788 --> 00:12:29,999 You're seriously gonna do this today? 109 00:12:31,667 --> 00:12:33,687 [Allison] Way to dress for the occasion, by the way. 110 00:12:33,711 --> 00:12:35,421 [Diego] At least I'm wearing black. 111 00:12:37,339 --> 00:12:39,216 You know what? I... Maybe he's right. 112 00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:41,260 - And I shouldn't... - [Allison] Forget about him. 113 00:12:42,344 --> 00:12:43,554 I'm glad you're here. 114 00:12:52,188 --> 00:12:54,273 [floor creaking] 115 00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:22,787 [Diego] I can save you some time. 116 00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:24,970 They're all locked. 117 00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:28,516 No forced entry, no sign of struggle. 118 00:13:29,016 --> 00:13:30,434 Nothing out of the ordinary. 119 00:13:33,395 --> 00:13:36,565 Oh, you got big, Luther. 120 00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,903 What's the secret, huh? Protein shakes? 121 00:13:41,445 --> 00:13:42,445 Low carbs? 122 00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:43,655 What do you want? 123 00:13:48,327 --> 00:13:49,537 The autopsy report. 124 00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:52,497 Ah. 125 00:13:55,709 --> 00:13:56,877 And you have this why? 126 00:13:57,211 --> 00:14:00,965 Well, that's because I... broke into the coroner's office. 127 00:14:01,048 --> 00:14:04,802 And surprise, surprise, Dad's death was... normal. 128 00:14:05,928 --> 00:14:07,888 Just a boring, old heart failure. 129 00:14:09,598 --> 00:14:10,599 Yeah, so? 130 00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:12,434 So, why are you in here, 131 00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:14,478 checking all the windows? 132 00:14:14,937 --> 00:14:17,606 - Were you the first one on the scene? - Pogo found him. 133 00:14:17,898 --> 00:14:21,485 Yeah, I talked to Pogo. He said he couldn't find Dad's monocle. 134 00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:23,153 And your point being? 135 00:14:23,237 --> 00:14:26,317 Can you think of a single time you saw Dad and he wasn't wearing that monocle? 136 00:14:27,449 --> 00:14:29,660 No. Which means someone took it. 137 00:14:29,743 --> 00:14:32,204 Which means there's a chance he wasn't alone when he died. 138 00:14:32,621 --> 00:14:35,708 There is no mystery here. Nothing to avenge. 139 00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:37,626 Nothing to solve, nothing like that. 140 00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:40,921 It's just a sad old man who kicked it 141 00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:42,548 in a big, empty house. 142 00:14:43,507 --> 00:14:45,885 Just like he deserved. 143 00:14:46,343 --> 00:14:47,343 You should leave. 144 00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:51,098 Whatever you say, brother. 145 00:14:55,936 --> 00:14:59,565 - [footsteps fading] - [sighs] 146 00:15:48,238 --> 00:15:50,282 [male voice] Welcome home, Ms. Vanya. 147 00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:51,658 [Vanya] Pogo. 148 00:15:56,705 --> 00:15:57,705 [Pogo] Hmm. 149 00:16:00,417 --> 00:16:02,753 [sighs] So good to see you. 150 00:16:05,339 --> 00:16:07,758 Ah, yes, your autobiography. 151 00:16:08,217 --> 00:16:09,259 Do you know, um... 152 00:16:12,221 --> 00:16:13,347 Did he ever read it? 153 00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:14,931 Hmm... 154 00:16:16,016 --> 00:16:17,685 Not that I'm aware of. 155 00:16:24,024 --> 00:16:26,610 [Vanya] How long has it been since Five disappeared? 156 00:16:27,861 --> 00:16:31,615 [Pogo] It's been 16 years, four months, and 14 days. 157 00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:35,786 Your father insisted I keep track. 158 00:16:37,287 --> 00:16:38,956 You wanna know something stupid? 159 00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:42,001 I always used to leave the lights on for him. 160 00:16:43,168 --> 00:16:45,337 I was scared that he would come back, 161 00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:48,048 it would be late, and the house would be dark 162 00:16:48,132 --> 00:16:50,801 and he wouldn't be able to find us, so he'd leave again. 163 00:16:51,385 --> 00:16:53,887 So, every night I'd make a little snack 164 00:16:53,971 --> 00:16:56,140 and make sure all the lights were on. 165 00:16:56,223 --> 00:16:57,766 Oh, I remember your snacks. 166 00:16:58,392 --> 00:17:01,145 I'm pretty sure I stepped in half those peanut butter 167 00:17:01,228 --> 00:17:02,688 and marshmallow sandwiches. 168 00:17:02,771 --> 00:17:04,898 [sighs] 169 00:17:06,900 --> 00:17:10,738 [sighs] Your father always believed 170 00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:13,490 that Number Five was still out there somewhere. 171 00:17:13,991 --> 00:17:15,367 He never lost hope. 172 00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:17,745 And look where that got him. 173 00:17:31,759 --> 00:17:32,926 [knocking on door] 174 00:17:34,428 --> 00:17:37,765 The children are ready for bed, sir. They wanted to say goodnight. 175 00:17:56,533 --> 00:17:59,745 Okay! Time for bed now, kids. Come along now. 176 00:18:00,537 --> 00:18:01,622 Come along now. 177 00:18:03,457 --> 00:18:05,793 Come along now, Allison, your father's busy. 178 00:18:05,876 --> 00:18:07,503 He's always busy. 179 00:18:12,132 --> 00:18:15,594 - [Klaus] Where's the cash, Dad? - [drawers clattering] 180 00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:20,974 [Klaus] Where's the cash? 181 00:18:24,812 --> 00:18:26,688 Klaus? What are you doing in here? 182 00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:28,982 Oh! Allison! 183 00:18:29,525 --> 00:18:31,443 Wow, is that you? 184 00:18:32,736 --> 00:18:34,696 Hey, come here. 185 00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:35,906 Long time. 186 00:18:36,365 --> 00:18:39,618 Too long. Hey, I was hoping to see you, actually, 187 00:18:39,701 --> 00:18:42,704 because I wanted to get your autograph. 188 00:18:42,788 --> 00:18:44,706 Add it to my collection! 189 00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:49,419 - Just out of rehab? - No, no. No, no, no, no. 190 00:18:49,503 --> 00:18:52,089 No. I'm done with all that. [sighs] 191 00:18:52,172 --> 00:18:54,133 I just came down here to prove to myself 192 00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:57,636 that the old man was really gone. 193 00:18:59,263 --> 00:19:02,683 And he is! He's dead. Yeah! 194 00:19:02,766 --> 00:19:05,144 You know how I know? Because if he were alive, 195 00:19:05,227 --> 00:19:09,731 not one of us would be allowed to set foot in this room. 196 00:19:10,774 --> 00:19:12,734 He was always in here, our whole childhood, 197 00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:15,863 plotting his next torment, right? [chuckles] 198 00:19:15,946 --> 00:19:19,199 Remember how he used to look at us? That scowl? 199 00:19:19,867 --> 00:19:21,994 Thank Christ he's not our real father 200 00:19:22,077 --> 00:19:24,955 so we couldn't inherit those cold, dead eyes! 201 00:19:25,038 --> 00:19:27,249 - [screams, exclaims] - [chuckles] 202 00:19:27,332 --> 00:19:30,052 - [imitating Reginald] Number Three! - [Luther] Get out of his chair. 203 00:19:31,420 --> 00:19:33,380 [Klaus] Oh, wow, Luther! 204 00:19:33,463 --> 00:19:34,506 Wow, you really, uh... 205 00:19:35,757 --> 00:19:37,509 You really filled out over the years, huh? 206 00:19:37,593 --> 00:19:40,637 - [Luther] Klaus. - Save the lecture. I was already leaving. 207 00:19:41,638 --> 00:19:46,059 You guys can talk amongst yourselves. [chuckles softly] 208 00:19:46,518 --> 00:19:48,187 - Drop it. - Ex-squeeze me? 209 00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:50,397 Do it. Now. 210 00:19:53,775 --> 00:19:55,819 All right. All right. 211 00:19:56,320 --> 00:20:00,574 It's just an advance on our inheritance! 212 00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:02,284 That's all it is. 213 00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:06,705 No need to get your little panties in a bunch. 214 00:20:20,093 --> 00:20:22,721 Ah. [kisses] 215 00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:26,308 So, Klaus is still Klaus, in case you were wondering. 216 00:20:26,642 --> 00:20:29,895 You know, after all these years, I find it strangely comforting. 217 00:20:30,896 --> 00:20:32,272 Did you see Diego? 218 00:20:32,564 --> 00:20:34,483 - With his stupid outfit? - Oh, I know. 219 00:20:34,566 --> 00:20:36,610 Do you think he wears that thing in the bathroom? 220 00:20:36,693 --> 00:20:38,362 - Like in the shower? - Yeah. 221 00:20:38,445 --> 00:20:39,821 Yes, absolutely! 222 00:20:40,197 --> 00:20:41,657 [Allison laughs] 223 00:20:46,495 --> 00:20:49,289 I, uh... I wasn't sure you'd come. 224 00:20:51,541 --> 00:20:52,668 Me neither. 225 00:20:53,794 --> 00:20:54,794 You look great. 226 00:20:58,257 --> 00:20:59,258 Thanks. 227 00:21:00,384 --> 00:21:02,511 Where's Patrick and Claire? 228 00:21:02,594 --> 00:21:05,514 Patrick filed for divorce eight months ago. 229 00:21:09,184 --> 00:21:11,728 Of course you don't know, you've been gone. 230 00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:14,022 What about Claire? 231 00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:20,445 He got custody. 232 00:21:22,072 --> 00:21:23,156 Shit. 233 00:21:27,202 --> 00:21:28,202 Well... 234 00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:31,665 You could always do your, uh, you know... 235 00:21:33,208 --> 00:21:34,208 rumor thing. 236 00:21:34,418 --> 00:21:36,044 Yeah, I don't do that anymore. 237 00:21:37,045 --> 00:21:39,715 - What happened? - Same thing that always happens. 238 00:21:40,424 --> 00:21:43,135 I made a wish, and it came true, and I couldn't take it back. 239 00:21:47,431 --> 00:21:49,266 [fire crackling] 240 00:21:57,399 --> 00:21:58,399 [Luther] Um... 241 00:21:58,817 --> 00:22:01,361 - [drink pouring] - I guess we should get this started. 242 00:22:01,445 --> 00:22:04,072 So, I figured we could have a sort of memorial service 243 00:22:04,156 --> 00:22:05,365 in the courtyard at sundown. 244 00:22:05,949 --> 00:22:08,327 Say a few words, just at Dad's favorite spot. 245 00:22:08,410 --> 00:22:10,704 - Dad had a favorite spot? - You know, under the oak tree. 246 00:22:11,997 --> 00:22:14,058 We used to sit out there all the time. None of you ever did that? 247 00:22:14,082 --> 00:22:15,292 Will there be refreshments? 248 00:22:16,335 --> 00:22:19,629 Tea? Scones? Cucumber sandwiches are always a winner. 249 00:22:19,713 --> 00:22:22,632 What? No. And put that out. Dad didn't allow smoking in here. 250 00:22:22,716 --> 00:22:24,760 - Is that my skirt? - What? 251 00:22:24,843 --> 00:22:27,637 Oh, yeah, this. I found it in your room. 252 00:22:27,721 --> 00:22:32,309 It's a little dated, I know, but it's very breathey on the bits. 253 00:22:32,392 --> 00:22:36,396 Listen up. Still some important things that we need to discuss, all right? 254 00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:38,315 - [Diego] Like what? - Like the way he died. 255 00:22:38,690 --> 00:22:39,775 And here we go. 256 00:22:39,858 --> 00:22:42,444 I don't understand. I thought they said it was a heart attack. 257 00:22:42,527 --> 00:22:43,713 Yeah, according to the coroner. 258 00:22:43,737 --> 00:22:45,457 - Well, wouldn't they know? - Theoretically. 259 00:22:45,530 --> 00:22:46,365 Theoretically? 260 00:22:46,448 --> 00:22:48,992 I'm just saying, at the very least, something happened. 261 00:22:49,576 --> 00:22:52,120 The last time that I talked to Dad, he sounded strange. 262 00:22:52,204 --> 00:22:54,164 [gurgling] Oh, quelle surprise! 263 00:22:54,623 --> 00:22:55,457 Strange how? 264 00:22:55,540 --> 00:22:59,044 He sounded on edge. Told me I should be careful who to trust. 265 00:22:59,127 --> 00:23:01,380 Luther, he was a paranoid, bitter old man 266 00:23:01,463 --> 00:23:03,590 who was starting to lose what was left of his marbles. 267 00:23:03,673 --> 00:23:05,842 No. He must have known something was going to happen. 268 00:23:06,593 --> 00:23:08,345 Look, I know you don't like to do it, 269 00:23:08,428 --> 00:23:09,930 but I need you to talk to Dad. 270 00:23:10,013 --> 00:23:11,013 [scoffs] 271 00:23:11,848 --> 00:23:16,436 I can't just call Dad in the afterlife and be like, "Dad, could you just... 272 00:23:16,978 --> 00:23:20,148 stop playing tennis with Hitler for a moment and take a quick call?" 273 00:23:20,232 --> 00:23:21,525 Since when? That's your thing. 274 00:23:21,608 --> 00:23:23,693 I'm not in the right... frame of mind. 275 00:23:23,777 --> 00:23:25,862 - You're high? - [laughs] Yeah! Yeah! 276 00:23:25,946 --> 00:23:28,782 I mean, how are you not, listening to this nonsense? 277 00:23:28,865 --> 00:23:30,325 Well, sober up, this is important. 278 00:23:30,409 --> 00:23:31,636 - [sighs] - [Luther] Then there's the issue 279 00:23:31,660 --> 00:23:34,413 - of the missing monocle. - Who gives a shit about a stupid monocle? 280 00:23:34,496 --> 00:23:35,496 Exactly. 281 00:23:35,956 --> 00:23:36,956 It's worthless. 282 00:23:36,998 --> 00:23:39,126 So whoever took it, I think it was personal. 283 00:23:39,543 --> 00:23:41,503 Someone close to him. Someone with a grudge. 284 00:23:41,586 --> 00:23:44,548 - Where are you going with this? - Oh, isn't it obvious, Klaus? 285 00:23:44,631 --> 00:23:46,425 He thinks one of us killed Dad. 286 00:23:46,508 --> 00:23:47,551 [grunts softly] 287 00:23:50,762 --> 00:23:51,972 You do? 288 00:23:52,055 --> 00:23:53,140 How could you think that? 289 00:23:54,141 --> 00:23:57,102 Great job, Luther. Way to lead. 290 00:23:57,561 --> 00:24:00,564 - That's not what I'm saying. - You're crazy, man. You're crazy. 291 00:24:00,939 --> 00:24:02,419 - Crazy. - [Luther] I've not finished. 292 00:24:02,482 --> 00:24:04,168 Sorry, I'm just gonna go murder Mom. Be right back. 293 00:24:04,192 --> 00:24:06,072 - Be right back. - That's not what I was saying. 294 00:24:06,111 --> 00:24:07,487 I didn't... [sighs] 295 00:24:09,573 --> 00:24:11,616 Allison. Jeez... 296 00:24:12,534 --> 00:24:14,369 [sighs] That went well. 297 00:24:14,995 --> 00:24:17,873 [man] In five, four, three, two... 298 00:24:18,206 --> 00:24:20,709 This is Jim Hellerman, reporting live for Channel 2 News 299 00:24:20,792 --> 00:24:23,628 outside of the Capital West bank at Main and Sixth. 300 00:24:23,879 --> 00:24:26,882 A group of heavily armed men stormed the bank not three hours ago 301 00:24:26,965 --> 00:24:29,092 and took an unknown number of hostages. 302 00:24:29,176 --> 00:24:31,636 - [man 2] Hey, get them behind the counter! - [alarm blaring] 303 00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:33,013 Now you've put me in a position 304 00:24:33,096 --> 00:24:36,641 where I gotta do something I don't want to do. Hmm? 305 00:24:36,933 --> 00:24:37,933 Shit! 306 00:24:39,436 --> 00:24:41,646 Hey, get back with the others. 307 00:24:41,980 --> 00:24:43,732 I heard a rumor. 308 00:24:43,815 --> 00:24:45,066 What? What did you say? 309 00:24:45,150 --> 00:24:47,152 ["The Walker" by Fitz And The Tantrums playing] 310 00:24:47,235 --> 00:24:51,114 [echoing] I heard a rumor that you shot your friend in the foot. 311 00:24:51,239 --> 00:24:53,992 ♪ 'Cause 99 miles per hour, baby ♪ 312 00:24:54,284 --> 00:24:56,119 - [gun cocks] - [man 3] Hey, dude. 313 00:24:56,703 --> 00:24:58,788 What the hell?[groans] 314 00:24:58,955 --> 00:25:00,957 [hostages screaming] 315 00:25:01,041 --> 00:25:01,875 [gunfire] 316 00:25:01,958 --> 00:25:04,336 [Jim] We just heard shots from inside the bank. 317 00:25:04,419 --> 00:25:06,671 It's uncertain if any hostages have been harmed in that. 318 00:25:06,755 --> 00:25:07,755 [man 4] Up there! 319 00:25:08,215 --> 00:25:11,301 [Jim] There's some movement on the roof. Possibly law enforcement. 320 00:25:11,384 --> 00:25:15,263 ♪ Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah Oh, here we go ♪ 321 00:25:15,347 --> 00:25:17,390 - [man 5 shouts] - [crowd screams] 322 00:25:17,474 --> 00:25:21,186 Looks like one of the armed robbers has been thrown from the bank. 323 00:25:21,269 --> 00:25:23,980 Guns are for sissies. Real men throw knives. 324 00:25:25,649 --> 00:25:26,858 [groans] 325 00:25:27,275 --> 00:25:29,361 I've been in many hostage situations, like this, 326 00:25:29,444 --> 00:25:30,946 and it can escalate very quickly. 327 00:25:31,029 --> 00:25:32,239 Get back, you freaks. 328 00:25:32,322 --> 00:25:34,342 - [Diego] Hey, be careful up there, buddy. - Get back now! 329 00:25:34,366 --> 00:25:36,660 - [Allison] Wouldn't want you to get hurt. - Or what? 330 00:25:36,743 --> 00:25:38,954 [grunting] 331 00:25:39,037 --> 00:25:41,498 ♪ Oh, here we go... ♪ 332 00:25:41,581 --> 00:25:45,794 - [gun clicks] - Ooh! That's one badass stapler! 333 00:25:46,419 --> 00:25:47,419 [man grunts] 334 00:25:49,714 --> 00:25:51,567 [Jim] Although there's been no activity for a few minutes, 335 00:25:51,591 --> 00:25:54,278 we're gonna stay live on location to make sure we don't miss anything 336 00:25:54,302 --> 00:25:56,471 in this hostage situation at the Capital West bank. 337 00:25:57,264 --> 00:25:58,848 Do we really have to do this? 338 00:25:58,932 --> 00:26:01,726 [Luther] Come on, Ben. There's more guys in the vault. 339 00:26:02,435 --> 00:26:04,896 [sighs] I didn't sign up for this. 340 00:26:05,272 --> 00:26:08,441 [Jim] Now we see the hostages. They... They're free. 341 00:26:08,525 --> 00:26:11,403 They're scared, clearly, but they do seem to be unharmed. 342 00:26:11,486 --> 00:26:15,073 - [beast screeches] - [people screaming] 343 00:26:16,616 --> 00:26:18,618 [beast roars] 344 00:26:21,371 --> 00:26:22,539 [music stops] 345 00:26:24,207 --> 00:26:25,207 [sighs] 346 00:26:27,043 --> 00:26:29,838 [breathes shakily] Can we go home now? 347 00:26:29,921 --> 00:26:32,966 [Jim] People are coming out now. It's not the armed robbers. 348 00:26:33,049 --> 00:26:37,262 These are young schoolchildren in uniforms with masks on. 349 00:26:37,345 --> 00:26:39,931 - [man] Lower your weapon! - [Jim] Jim Hellerman, Channel 2 News. 350 00:26:40,015 --> 00:26:42,618 - [man 2] How did you get in the bank? - [man 3] What happened inside? 351 00:26:42,642 --> 00:26:44,853 Why can't I go play with the others? 352 00:26:45,228 --> 00:26:47,606 We've been through this before, Number Seven. 353 00:26:47,689 --> 00:26:49,858 - [helicopter blades whirring] - [sirens wailing] 354 00:26:49,941 --> 00:26:52,569 I'm afraid there's just nothing special about you. 355 00:26:56,364 --> 00:26:57,364 Oh. 356 00:26:58,992 --> 00:27:01,369 - [camera shutters clicking] - Our world is changing. 357 00:27:01,453 --> 00:27:02,787 Has changed. 358 00:27:03,163 --> 00:27:05,206 There are some among us 359 00:27:05,290 --> 00:27:09,085 gifted with abilities far beyond the ordinary. 360 00:27:09,919 --> 00:27:13,256 I have adopted six such children. 361 00:27:13,590 --> 00:27:15,717 I give you the inaugural class 362 00:27:16,676 --> 00:27:18,386 of the Umbrella Academy. 363 00:27:18,470 --> 00:27:20,639 Mr. Hargreeves! Mr. Hargreeves. Channel 9 News. 364 00:27:20,722 --> 00:27:22,015 What happened to their parents? 365 00:27:22,098 --> 00:27:23,850 They were suitably compensated. 366 00:27:23,933 --> 00:27:26,102 Are you concerned about the welfare of the children? 367 00:27:26,186 --> 00:27:27,186 Of course. 368 00:27:27,604 --> 00:27:29,856 As I am for the fate of the world. 369 00:27:29,939 --> 00:27:31,941 [camera shutters continue clicking] 370 00:27:33,693 --> 00:27:34,944 [Klaus] Listen up, old man. 371 00:27:35,028 --> 00:27:37,364 You know, if I was murdered, and if one of my sons... 372 00:27:37,447 --> 00:27:39,658 adopted sons... happened to be able 373 00:27:39,741 --> 00:27:42,077 to commune with the dead, I might think about, 374 00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:44,621 [laughs] I don't know, I don't know... 375 00:27:44,704 --> 00:27:45,914 manifesting! 376 00:27:46,206 --> 00:27:48,875 Do the whole big angry ghost lecture. 377 00:27:49,125 --> 00:27:53,672 Tell everyone who done it, and find eternal peace. 378 00:27:53,963 --> 00:27:56,466 Eternal peace is probably overrated. 379 00:27:58,593 --> 00:27:59,636 [sighs] 380 00:28:10,188 --> 00:28:11,481 Come on now, Reggie. 381 00:28:13,024 --> 00:28:14,192 Any time now. 382 00:28:16,569 --> 00:28:18,488 Please. [chuckles] 383 00:28:18,571 --> 00:28:20,031 Just need to sober up! 384 00:28:22,117 --> 00:28:23,576 Clear thoughts. [exhales] 385 00:28:27,706 --> 00:28:30,750 Come on! Come on, chop-chop! 386 00:28:30,834 --> 00:28:33,545 You always were a stubborn bastard! 387 00:28:33,628 --> 00:28:36,965 [panting] I don't know about you, but I need a drink. 388 00:28:38,675 --> 00:28:40,844 [gasps, laughs] 389 00:28:41,177 --> 00:28:42,177 Oh! 390 00:28:42,387 --> 00:28:44,389 [floor creaking] 391 00:29:12,500 --> 00:29:14,502 [birds chirping] 392 00:29:36,983 --> 00:29:39,986 Oh. Three? Okay! 393 00:29:42,197 --> 00:29:43,490 [sighs] 394 00:29:46,493 --> 00:29:47,786 [sighs] 395 00:29:49,412 --> 00:29:50,997 [exhales] 396 00:29:52,165 --> 00:29:55,084 [knuckles crack] 397 00:30:31,955 --> 00:30:32,955 [player clicks] 398 00:30:35,792 --> 00:30:38,211 ["I Think We're Alone Now" by Tiffany playing] 399 00:30:55,144 --> 00:30:58,106 ♪ Children behave ♪ 400 00:30:58,815 --> 00:31:01,734 ♪ That's what they say When we're together ♪ 401 00:31:02,277 --> 00:31:05,238 ♪ And watch how you play ♪ 402 00:31:05,989 --> 00:31:08,867 ♪ They don't understand And so we're ♪ 403 00:31:08,950 --> 00:31:11,452 ♪ Running just as fast as we can ♪ 404 00:31:12,620 --> 00:31:15,415 ♪ Holdin' on to one another's hand ♪ 405 00:31:16,207 --> 00:31:19,335 ♪ Tryin' to get away into the night ♪ 406 00:31:19,419 --> 00:31:21,337 ♪ And then you put your arms around me ♪ 407 00:31:21,421 --> 00:31:24,257 ♪ And we tumble to the ground And then you say ♪ 408 00:31:24,340 --> 00:31:26,467 ♪ I think we're alone now ♪ 409 00:31:27,135 --> 00:31:30,930 ♪ There doesn't seem to be anyone around ♪ 410 00:31:31,723 --> 00:31:33,766 ♪ I think we're alone now ♪ 411 00:31:34,517 --> 00:31:38,479 ♪ The beating of our hearts Is the only sound ♪ 412 00:31:46,613 --> 00:31:49,198 ♪ Look at the way ♪ 413 00:31:50,325 --> 00:31:52,785 ♪ We gotta hide what we're doin' ♪ 414 00:31:53,786 --> 00:31:56,372 ♪ 'Cause what would they say ♪ 415 00:31:57,665 --> 00:32:00,209 ♪ If they ever knew And so we're ♪ 416 00:32:00,293 --> 00:32:02,921 ♪ Running just as fast as we can ♪ 417 00:32:04,088 --> 00:32:06,799 ♪ Holdin' on to one another's hand ♪ 418 00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:10,678 ♪ Tryin' to get away into the night ♪ 419 00:32:10,762 --> 00:32:12,889 ♪ And then you put your arms around me ♪ 420 00:32:12,972 --> 00:32:15,600 ♪ And we tumble to the ground And then you say ♪ 421 00:32:15,683 --> 00:32:17,894 ♪ I think we're alone now ♪ 422 00:32:18,603 --> 00:32:22,065 ♪ There doesn't seem to be anyone around ♪ 423 00:32:23,149 --> 00:32:25,276 ♪ I think we're alone now ♪ 424 00:32:25,902 --> 00:32:29,864 ♪ The beating of our hearts Is the only sound ♪ 425 00:32:30,490 --> 00:32:32,533 ♪ I think we're alone now ♪ 426 00:32:33,284 --> 00:32:37,163 ♪ There doesn't seem to be anyone around ♪ 427 00:32:37,997 --> 00:32:39,832 ♪ I think we're alone now ♪ 428 00:32:40,667 --> 00:32:44,504 ♪ The beating of our hearts Is the only sound ♪ 429 00:32:44,963 --> 00:32:46,881 - [thunder rumbles] - [music stops] 430 00:32:49,634 --> 00:32:51,052 [glass shatters] 431 00:32:51,970 --> 00:32:53,596 [locket clatters] 432 00:32:54,639 --> 00:32:56,349 Oh! Daddy? 433 00:32:57,934 --> 00:32:58,934 [gasps] 434 00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:03,606 - Oh. - [wind howling] 435 00:33:06,359 --> 00:33:08,479 - [Vanya] What is it? - [Allison] Don't get too close! 436 00:33:08,528 --> 00:33:09,696 Yeah, no shit. 437 00:33:09,779 --> 00:33:12,031 Looks like some sort of temporal anomaly. 438 00:33:13,032 --> 00:33:15,535 Either that or a miniature black hole. One of the two. 439 00:33:15,618 --> 00:33:18,329 - Pretty big difference there, Paul Bunyan. - Out of the way! 440 00:33:18,746 --> 00:33:19,746 [Luther] What are you... 441 00:33:23,584 --> 00:33:25,712 - [Allison] What is that gonna do? - I don't know. 442 00:33:25,795 --> 00:33:27,130 Do you have a better idea? 443 00:33:27,880 --> 00:33:30,008 - [electricity crackles] - [Luther] Whoa, whoa, whoa. 444 00:33:30,091 --> 00:33:32,802 - Everybody get behind me. - Yeah, get behind us. 445 00:33:32,885 --> 00:33:35,221 [Klaus] I vote for running, c'mon! 446 00:33:38,975 --> 00:33:40,810 - [electricity crackling] - [screams] 447 00:33:44,605 --> 00:33:46,566 [thunder fades] 448 00:33:55,116 --> 00:33:56,743 Does anyone else see 449 00:33:57,452 --> 00:34:00,371 little Number Five, or is that just me? 450 00:34:05,168 --> 00:34:06,168 Shit. 451 00:34:09,464 --> 00:34:12,091 [sighs] What's the date? The exact date. 452 00:34:12,175 --> 00:34:13,301 [Vanya] The 24th. 453 00:34:13,384 --> 00:34:14,635 - [Five] Of what? - March. 454 00:34:15,678 --> 00:34:16,512 Good. 455 00:34:16,596 --> 00:34:19,098 So, are we gonna talk about what just happened? 456 00:34:24,395 --> 00:34:26,022 It's been 17 years. 457 00:34:26,355 --> 00:34:28,858 [scoffs] It's been a lot longer than that. 458 00:34:30,568 --> 00:34:31,652 I haven't missed that. 459 00:34:31,736 --> 00:34:32,570 Where'd you go? 460 00:34:32,653 --> 00:34:35,198 The future. It's shit, by the way. 461 00:34:35,281 --> 00:34:36,281 Called it. 462 00:34:36,532 --> 00:34:38,701 I should've listened to the old man. 463 00:34:39,077 --> 00:34:41,704 You know, jumping through space is one thing, 464 00:34:42,121 --> 00:34:44,248 jumping through time is a toss of the dice. 465 00:34:46,834 --> 00:34:47,668 Nice dress. 466 00:34:47,752 --> 00:34:49,337 Oh, well, danke! 467 00:34:49,420 --> 00:34:50,755 Wait, how did you get back? 468 00:34:50,838 --> 00:34:53,007 In the end, I had to project my consciousness forward 469 00:34:53,091 --> 00:34:55,760 into a suspended quantum state version of myself 470 00:34:55,843 --> 00:34:58,262 that exists across every possible instance of time. 471 00:34:58,846 --> 00:34:59,889 That makes no sense. 472 00:34:59,972 --> 00:35:01,372 Well, it would if you were smarter. 473 00:35:02,225 --> 00:35:05,436 - How long were you there? - Forty-five years. Give or take. 474 00:35:08,022 --> 00:35:10,691 So what are you saying? That you're 58? 475 00:35:11,067 --> 00:35:13,820 No, my consciousness is 58. 476 00:35:14,612 --> 00:35:16,656 Apparently, my body is now 13 again. 477 00:35:16,739 --> 00:35:18,491 Wait, how does that even work? 478 00:35:18,574 --> 00:35:21,410 Delores kept saying the equations were off. Eh. 479 00:35:22,245 --> 00:35:23,454 Bet she's laughing now. 480 00:35:23,538 --> 00:35:24,538 Delores? 481 00:35:25,373 --> 00:35:26,374 Hmm. 482 00:35:26,666 --> 00:35:28,852 - Guess I missed the funeral. - How'd you know about that? 483 00:35:28,876 --> 00:35:30,711 What part of the future do you not understand? 484 00:35:31,379 --> 00:35:32,255 Heart failure, huh? 485 00:35:32,338 --> 00:35:33,464 - Yeah. - No. 486 00:35:34,173 --> 00:35:35,173 [Five] Hmm. 487 00:35:35,466 --> 00:35:37,426 [clicks tongue] Nice to see nothing's changed. 488 00:35:38,052 --> 00:35:40,471 Uh, that's it? That's all you have to say? 489 00:35:40,555 --> 00:35:43,516 [Five] What else is there to say? The circle of life. 490 00:35:46,310 --> 00:35:47,310 Well... 491 00:35:48,980 --> 00:35:49,981 That was interesting. 492 00:35:58,906 --> 00:36:00,366 Ah, shit. 493 00:36:07,248 --> 00:36:09,000 Nice to know Dad didn't forget me. 494 00:36:10,751 --> 00:36:12,128 Read your book, by the way. 495 00:36:13,713 --> 00:36:15,756 Found it in a library that was still standing. 496 00:36:19,302 --> 00:36:22,555 I thought it was pretty good, all things considered. 497 00:36:23,389 --> 00:36:24,807 Yeah, definitely ballsy, 498 00:36:25,308 --> 00:36:27,101 giving up the family secrets. 499 00:36:29,395 --> 00:36:30,730 Sure that went over well. 500 00:36:31,147 --> 00:36:31,981 They hate me. 501 00:36:32,064 --> 00:36:34,108 Oh, there are worse things that can happen. 502 00:36:34,525 --> 00:36:36,319 You mean like what happened to Ben? 503 00:36:38,237 --> 00:36:39,237 Was it bad? 504 00:36:44,535 --> 00:36:46,537 [thunder rumbles] 505 00:36:56,797 --> 00:36:57,797 [door opens] 506 00:37:13,940 --> 00:37:15,066 Did something happen? 507 00:37:17,652 --> 00:37:20,238 Dad died. Remember? 508 00:37:20,446 --> 00:37:22,657 Oh. Yes, of course. 509 00:37:24,033 --> 00:37:25,033 Is Mom okay? 510 00:37:25,243 --> 00:37:27,119 Yeah, yeah, she's fine. 511 00:37:27,662 --> 00:37:30,623 She just needs to rest. You know, recharge. 512 00:37:35,211 --> 00:37:36,545 Whenever you're ready, dear boy. 513 00:37:58,442 --> 00:38:01,112 Probably would have been better with some wind. 514 00:38:02,947 --> 00:38:05,032 Does anyone wish to speak? 515 00:38:10,162 --> 00:38:11,289 Very well. 516 00:38:14,792 --> 00:38:16,544 In all regards, 517 00:38:17,044 --> 00:38:21,716 Sir Reginald Hargreeves made me what I am today. 518 00:38:23,968 --> 00:38:27,555 For that alone, I shall forever be in his debt. 519 00:38:29,098 --> 00:38:30,808 He was my master... 520 00:38:32,643 --> 00:38:33,978 and my friend, 521 00:38:35,771 --> 00:38:37,773 and I shall miss him very much. 522 00:38:42,945 --> 00:38:45,489 He leaves behind a complicated legacy... 523 00:38:45,573 --> 00:38:46,949 He was a monster. 524 00:38:47,033 --> 00:38:48,117 [laughs] 525 00:38:48,826 --> 00:38:51,370 He was a bad person and a worse father. 526 00:38:52,955 --> 00:38:54,832 - The world's better off without him. - Diego. 527 00:38:54,915 --> 00:38:56,709 My name is Number Two. 528 00:38:57,376 --> 00:38:58,461 You know why? 529 00:38:59,170 --> 00:39:02,590 Because our father couldn't be bothered to give us actual names. 530 00:39:03,299 --> 00:39:04,592 He had Mom do it. 531 00:39:04,675 --> 00:39:06,344 [Mom] Would anyone like something to eat? 532 00:39:06,427 --> 00:39:07,720 No, it's okay, Mom. 533 00:39:08,095 --> 00:39:10,014 Oh, okay. 534 00:39:11,098 --> 00:39:13,100 Look, you wanna pay your respects? 535 00:39:15,436 --> 00:39:16,436 Go ahead. 536 00:39:17,605 --> 00:39:19,645 But at least be honest about the kind of man he was. 537 00:39:19,940 --> 00:39:21,150 You should stop talking now. 538 00:39:23,027 --> 00:39:26,280 You know, you of all people should be on my side here, Number One. 539 00:39:26,364 --> 00:39:27,281 I am warning you. 540 00:39:27,365 --> 00:39:29,325 [Diego] After everything he did to you? 541 00:39:30,117 --> 00:39:32,703 He had to ship you a million miles away. 542 00:39:32,787 --> 00:39:34,246 Diego, stop talking. 543 00:39:34,330 --> 00:39:37,500 That's how much he couldn't stand the sight of you! 544 00:39:38,751 --> 00:39:40,878 [both grunting] 545 00:39:41,545 --> 00:39:43,297 Boys, stop this at once! 546 00:39:45,341 --> 00:39:46,926 [screams] Come on, big boy! 547 00:39:49,220 --> 00:39:50,429 [grunts] 548 00:39:50,513 --> 00:39:51,514 Stop it! 549 00:39:51,597 --> 00:39:53,474 Hit him! Hit him! 550 00:39:54,809 --> 00:39:56,727 [sighs, scoffs] 551 00:40:05,069 --> 00:40:06,904 [Diego] Get off me! 552 00:40:10,533 --> 00:40:12,660 [both panting] 553 00:40:12,743 --> 00:40:14,245 We don't have time for this. 554 00:40:15,329 --> 00:40:16,414 [Diego] Come here, big boy! 555 00:40:16,664 --> 00:40:18,249 [shouts] 556 00:40:21,502 --> 00:40:23,379 Oh... 557 00:40:23,629 --> 00:40:25,339 And there goes Ben's statue. 558 00:40:29,677 --> 00:40:31,303 - Diego, no! - [grunts] 559 00:40:31,387 --> 00:40:32,387 [groans] 560 00:40:32,638 --> 00:40:34,765 [Luther gasps, panting] 561 00:40:49,155 --> 00:40:51,031 You never know when to stop, do you? 562 00:40:54,410 --> 00:40:56,579 You got enough material for your sequel yet? 563 00:40:59,457 --> 00:41:01,000 He was my father, too. 564 00:41:13,637 --> 00:41:14,637 Mom. 565 00:41:15,890 --> 00:41:17,016 Let's go inside. 566 00:41:17,766 --> 00:41:19,226 Come on. Okay? Come on. 567 00:41:39,205 --> 00:41:41,999 I bet you're loving this. Hmm? 568 00:41:43,542 --> 00:41:45,961 The team at its best. 569 00:41:47,922 --> 00:41:50,090 It's just like old times. 570 00:41:58,307 --> 00:42:01,185 Best funeral ever. 571 00:42:01,936 --> 00:42:03,687 [Reginald] Nietzsche once said, 572 00:42:03,771 --> 00:42:05,397 "Man is as a rope 573 00:42:05,481 --> 00:42:08,692 stretched between the animal and the superhuman. 574 00:42:09,193 --> 00:42:11,278 A rope over an abyss. 575 00:42:11,362 --> 00:42:13,239 It is a dangerous crossing, 576 00:42:13,322 --> 00:42:17,701 a dangerous looking-back, a dangerous trembling and halting." 577 00:42:17,785 --> 00:42:19,245 [whistle blows] 578 00:42:19,328 --> 00:42:22,039 As much as you must strive for individual greatness, 579 00:42:22,122 --> 00:42:23,541 and strive you must, 580 00:42:23,624 --> 00:42:25,960 for it won't come to you of its own accord... 581 00:42:26,877 --> 00:42:28,379 you must also remember 582 00:42:28,462 --> 00:42:31,298 that there is no individual stronger than the collective. 583 00:42:32,758 --> 00:42:34,398 [Diego] That's not fair, Five's cheating! 584 00:42:34,468 --> 00:42:35,678 He adapted. 585 00:42:37,721 --> 00:42:39,807 The ties that bind you together 586 00:42:39,890 --> 00:42:42,601 - make you stronger than you are alone. - [Allison crying] 587 00:42:43,561 --> 00:42:46,522 - [machine buzzing] - [groaning] 588 00:42:47,147 --> 00:42:48,816 [Reginald] They will make you impervious 589 00:42:48,899 --> 00:42:52,361 to the pain and hardship the world will thrust upon you. 590 00:42:53,612 --> 00:42:55,197 And believe me when I tell you, 591 00:42:56,240 --> 00:42:57,866 life will be hard. 592 00:42:59,201 --> 00:43:00,661 It will be painful. 593 00:43:22,516 --> 00:43:24,560 We can accomplish anything 594 00:43:24,643 --> 00:43:27,980 when we accept responsibility together. 595 00:43:28,981 --> 00:43:31,942 This is what creates trust. 596 00:43:42,745 --> 00:43:45,497 [static crackles] 597 00:43:47,583 --> 00:43:49,585 [buzzing] 598 00:43:49,668 --> 00:43:51,670 [machine beeping] 599 00:44:00,387 --> 00:44:03,432 Together, you will stand against the reign of evil. 600 00:44:03,641 --> 00:44:06,060 [beeping intensifies] 601 00:44:19,782 --> 00:44:21,325 Don't waste your time. 602 00:44:22,076 --> 00:44:23,994 Diego's right, I shouldn't have come. 603 00:44:24,078 --> 00:44:27,206 This is your home and always will be. 604 00:44:28,707 --> 00:44:30,084 Should I get you a taxi? 605 00:44:30,167 --> 00:44:32,169 I already called one. But thanks. 606 00:44:32,252 --> 00:44:33,252 [horn honks] 607 00:44:33,295 --> 00:44:34,880 - That's me. - Uh... 608 00:44:35,547 --> 00:44:37,091 I hope you know 609 00:44:37,174 --> 00:44:40,010 your father loved you very much. 610 00:44:41,428 --> 00:44:42,596 In his own way. 611 00:44:44,890 --> 00:44:46,810 Yeah, well, that's kind of the problem, isn't it? 612 00:44:46,892 --> 00:44:48,060 Take care of yourself. 613 00:44:48,435 --> 00:44:50,062 You as well, Miss Vanya. 614 00:45:04,034 --> 00:45:05,202 [car door closes] 615 00:45:19,550 --> 00:45:20,676 Where's Vanya? 616 00:45:21,385 --> 00:45:23,387 Oh, she's gone. 617 00:45:24,430 --> 00:45:25,950 - That's unfortunate. - [Allison] Yeah. 618 00:45:26,974 --> 00:45:30,185 An entire square block. Forty-two bedrooms, 19 bathrooms, 619 00:45:30,269 --> 00:45:32,479 but no, not a single drop of coffee. 620 00:45:32,563 --> 00:45:33,605 Dad hated caffeine. 621 00:45:33,689 --> 00:45:37,943 Well, he hated children, too, and he had plenty of us. [laughs] 622 00:45:39,862 --> 00:45:40,904 I'm taking the car. 623 00:45:41,822 --> 00:45:43,282 Where are you going? 624 00:45:45,200 --> 00:45:46,869 To get a decent cup of coffee. 625 00:45:46,952 --> 00:45:48,537 Do you even know how to drive? 626 00:45:48,996 --> 00:45:50,539 I know how to do everything. 627 00:45:51,999 --> 00:45:54,710 I feel like we should try and stop him, 628 00:45:54,793 --> 00:45:58,297 but then again, I also just kinda want to see what happens. 629 00:45:58,380 --> 00:45:59,882 [engine turns over] 630 00:46:04,303 --> 00:46:07,097 All right, I guess I'll see you guys in, what, ten years? 631 00:46:07,181 --> 00:46:08,599 When Pogo dies? 632 00:46:08,682 --> 00:46:11,477 - Not if you die first. - Yeah, love you too, sis. 633 00:46:11,560 --> 00:46:13,020 Good luck on your next film. 634 00:46:13,604 --> 00:46:15,939 Hope it turns out better than your marriage, huh? 635 00:46:21,403 --> 00:46:23,781 - Are... Are we leaving? - No, I'm leaving, me by myself. 636 00:46:23,864 --> 00:46:25,908 Oh, fabulous! I'll get my things. 637 00:46:26,950 --> 00:46:28,952 [crickets chirping] 638 00:46:36,585 --> 00:46:38,504 Hey! Diego. 639 00:46:38,587 --> 00:46:41,799 You know, every time I close my eyes, 640 00:46:41,882 --> 00:46:45,010 I see a diarrhetic hippo about to shit on my face. 641 00:46:45,636 --> 00:46:46,887 It's terrifying! 642 00:46:47,262 --> 00:46:48,262 Terrific. 643 00:46:48,305 --> 00:46:50,307 [engine turns over] 644 00:46:50,891 --> 00:46:52,810 No! No. 645 00:46:52,893 --> 00:46:55,103 - Lean back. - [engine revs] 646 00:46:56,355 --> 00:46:57,773 [tires screech] 647 00:48:08,427 --> 00:48:11,847 [whirring] 648 00:48:14,975 --> 00:48:17,477 [chiming] 649 00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:21,982 [brakes screech] 650 00:48:37,873 --> 00:48:38,873 [bell rings] 651 00:48:41,168 --> 00:48:42,168 [sighs] 652 00:48:46,715 --> 00:48:48,216 [exhales deeply] 653 00:48:48,300 --> 00:48:50,302 [dishes clattering] 654 00:48:53,472 --> 00:48:54,723 [Five sighs] 655 00:48:55,682 --> 00:48:58,602 [waitress sighs] Sorry, sink was clogged. [chuckles] 656 00:48:58,810 --> 00:49:00,437 So, what'll it be? 657 00:49:00,854 --> 00:49:03,690 - Uh, give me a chocolate éclair. - Mm-hmm. Sure. 658 00:49:04,650 --> 00:49:07,653 Can I get the kid a glass of milk or something? 659 00:49:08,278 --> 00:49:11,865 [scoffs] The kid wants coffee. Black. 660 00:49:13,742 --> 00:49:15,118 Cute kid. [chuckles] 661 00:49:20,999 --> 00:49:22,000 Okay. 662 00:49:25,837 --> 00:49:27,172 [Five sighs] 663 00:49:32,010 --> 00:49:34,471 Don't remember this place being such a shithole. 664 00:49:34,972 --> 00:49:36,431 I used to come here as a kid. 665 00:49:36,515 --> 00:49:38,600 Used to sneak out with my brothers and sisters 666 00:49:38,684 --> 00:49:40,894 and eat doughnuts till we puked. 667 00:49:42,145 --> 00:49:43,480 Simpler times, huh? 668 00:49:43,855 --> 00:49:44,855 Eh. 669 00:49:45,482 --> 00:49:46,650 I suppose. 670 00:49:49,236 --> 00:49:51,238 [waitress clears throat] Here. 671 00:49:54,533 --> 00:49:55,533 [man] I got his. 672 00:49:56,743 --> 00:49:57,743 Thanks. 673 00:50:02,249 --> 00:50:03,809 You must know your way around the city. 674 00:50:05,168 --> 00:50:07,504 I hope so. I've been driving it for 20 years. 675 00:50:07,838 --> 00:50:09,840 Good. I need an address. 676 00:50:10,674 --> 00:50:12,676 [machine beeping] 677 00:50:20,017 --> 00:50:21,852 - [exhales] - [engine starts] 678 00:50:32,320 --> 00:50:34,614 Hmm. That was fast. 679 00:50:34,990 --> 00:50:37,367 I thought I'd have more time before they found me. 680 00:50:37,451 --> 00:50:38,451 Okay. 681 00:50:38,618 --> 00:50:40,996 So let's all be professional about this, yeah? 682 00:50:41,538 --> 00:50:44,166 On your feet and come with us. They want to talk. 683 00:50:44,708 --> 00:50:46,043 I've got nothing to say. 684 00:50:47,210 --> 00:50:49,171 It doesn't have to go this way. 685 00:50:49,838 --> 00:50:53,341 You think I want to shoot a kid? Go home with that on my conscience? 686 00:50:55,427 --> 00:50:57,304 Well, I wouldn't worry about that. 687 00:50:58,263 --> 00:50:59,306 You won't be going home. 688 00:50:59,389 --> 00:51:02,809 ["Istanbul (Not Constantinople)" by They Might Be Giants playing] 689 00:51:03,643 --> 00:51:05,020 - [gunfire] - [man groans] 690 00:51:09,649 --> 00:51:10,649 Hey, assholes! 691 00:51:21,161 --> 00:51:24,956 ♪ Istanbul was Constantinople Now it's Istanbul, not Constantinople ♪ 692 00:51:25,040 --> 00:51:27,209 ♪ Been a long time gone, Constantinople ♪ 693 00:51:27,292 --> 00:51:29,461 ♪ Now it's Turkish delight On a moonlit night ♪ 694 00:51:29,544 --> 00:51:33,381 ♪ Every gal in Constantinople Lives in Istanbul, not Constantinople ♪ 695 00:51:33,465 --> 00:51:37,302 ♪ So if you've a date in Constantinople She'll be waiting in Istanbul ♪ 696 00:51:37,385 --> 00:51:39,805 - ♪ Even old New York ♪ - [man grunts] 697 00:51:39,888 --> 00:51:41,681 - ♪ Was once New Amsterdam ♪ - [groaning] 698 00:51:41,765 --> 00:51:45,769 ♪ Why they changed it I can't say People just liked it better that way ♪ 699 00:51:45,852 --> 00:51:48,188 - [man 2 screams] - ♪ So take me back to Constantinople ♪ 700 00:51:48,271 --> 00:51:50,023 ♪ No, you can't go back To Constantinople ♪ 701 00:51:50,107 --> 00:51:52,234 ♪ Been a long time gone, Constantinople ♪ 702 00:51:52,317 --> 00:51:54,528 - [gunfire] - [men scream, thud] 703 00:51:55,612 --> 00:51:56,905 [Five sighs] 704 00:52:02,410 --> 00:52:03,554 - ♪ Istanbul ♪ - ♪ Istanbul ♪ 705 00:52:03,578 --> 00:52:07,791 ♪ Even old New York Was once New Amsterdam ♪ 706 00:52:08,250 --> 00:52:09,960 ♪ Why they changed it, I can't say ♪ 707 00:52:10,043 --> 00:52:12,396 - ♪ People just liked it better that way ♪ - [man 3 gasping] 708 00:52:12,420 --> 00:52:16,216 ♪ Istanbul was Constantinople Now it's Istanbul, not Constantinople ♪ 709 00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:18,301 - [man 3 grunts] - [neck snaps] 710 00:52:20,637 --> 00:52:23,348 ♪ That's nobody's business but the Turks ♪ 711 00:52:26,393 --> 00:52:27,477 [grunts] 712 00:52:33,567 --> 00:52:34,568 [groans] 713 00:52:35,652 --> 00:52:38,572 [chip beeping] 714 00:52:44,703 --> 00:52:46,703 - [beeping] - ♪ So take me back to Constantinople ♪ 715 00:52:46,746 --> 00:52:48,874 ♪ No, you can't go back To Constantinople ♪ 716 00:52:48,957 --> 00:52:51,001 ♪ Been a long time gone, Constantinople ♪ 717 00:52:51,084 --> 00:52:53,128 ♪ Why did Constantinople get the works? ♪ 718 00:52:53,211 --> 00:52:57,674 ♪ That's nobody's business but the Turks ♪ 719 00:52:58,508 --> 00:53:02,846 ♪ Istanbul ♪ 720 00:53:13,565 --> 00:53:15,567 [Luther] Do you ever remember a single time 721 00:53:15,650 --> 00:53:17,652 that Dad wasn't wearing his monocle? 722 00:53:25,535 --> 00:53:27,454 Yoo-hoo, Diego! 723 00:53:28,205 --> 00:53:32,000 I hate to rush you through any kind of brooding moment you might be having, 724 00:53:32,083 --> 00:53:34,044 but come on, man, we're starving! 725 00:53:40,717 --> 00:53:43,553 [inhales, exhales] 726 00:53:43,637 --> 00:53:45,972 I'm craving... 727 00:53:46,389 --> 00:53:47,390 eggs. 728 00:53:47,474 --> 00:53:48,725 [clicks tongue] No! 729 00:53:49,559 --> 00:53:51,561 Wait, it's too late for eggs. 730 00:53:52,145 --> 00:53:54,064 Waffles. Huh? 731 00:53:54,481 --> 00:53:55,815 You like waffles, right? 732 00:53:56,566 --> 00:53:58,568 Ah. Of course you do. 733 00:53:59,986 --> 00:54:01,905 Everyone likes waffles. 734 00:54:03,698 --> 00:54:04,698 [water splashes] 735 00:54:09,037 --> 00:54:10,038 [static over radio] 736 00:54:10,497 --> 00:54:12,999 [woman over police radio] Gunshots reported on the 400 block 737 00:54:13,083 --> 00:54:15,126 of Milton Avenue, Griddy's Doughnuts. 738 00:54:18,713 --> 00:54:20,548 Diego, thank you for joining us, 739 00:54:20,632 --> 00:54:23,969 we have decided on, drum roll, waffles. 740 00:54:24,052 --> 00:54:27,305 I'm gonna drop you off at the bus stop. I gotta get back to work. 741 00:54:30,058 --> 00:54:33,478 What, breaking bones and cracking skulls? [chuckles softly] 742 00:54:33,561 --> 00:54:35,230 Saving lives, baby. 743 00:54:35,897 --> 00:54:38,858 Well, I guess it's frozen waffles again. 744 00:54:47,867 --> 00:54:49,828 Yeah, I could do egg and bacon, 745 00:54:49,911 --> 00:54:52,831 but I'm trying to cut down on my pig products. 746 00:54:55,667 --> 00:54:56,667 [engine turns over] 747 00:55:07,470 --> 00:55:09,472 [siren wails in distance] 748 00:55:18,982 --> 00:55:21,860 - [lock clicks] - [hinges creak] 749 00:55:25,071 --> 00:55:26,114 Jesus! 750 00:55:26,197 --> 00:55:28,033 You should have locks on your windows. 751 00:55:28,450 --> 00:55:30,035 I live on the second floor. 752 00:55:30,118 --> 00:55:31,286 Rapists can climb. 753 00:55:32,454 --> 00:55:33,580 You are so weird. 754 00:55:43,965 --> 00:55:44,965 Is that blood? 755 00:55:47,135 --> 00:55:48,135 It's nothing. 756 00:55:50,638 --> 00:55:51,638 Why are you here? 757 00:55:53,433 --> 00:55:55,977 [sighs] I've decided you're the only one I can trust. 758 00:55:56,436 --> 00:55:57,436 Why me? 759 00:55:57,687 --> 00:55:58,688 Because you're ordinary. 760 00:56:01,316 --> 00:56:02,317 Because you'll listen. 761 00:56:04,652 --> 00:56:05,652 Okay. 762 00:56:16,456 --> 00:56:17,540 [inhales sharply] 763 00:56:25,090 --> 00:56:27,592 When I jumped forward and got stuck in the future, 764 00:56:28,510 --> 00:56:29,552 do you know what I found? 765 00:56:29,969 --> 00:56:31,930 - No. - Nothing. 766 00:56:34,682 --> 00:56:36,309 Absolutely nothing. 767 00:56:38,228 --> 00:56:41,606 As far as I could tell, I was the last person left alive. 768 00:56:42,440 --> 00:56:45,235 I never figured out what killed the human race, but... 769 00:56:46,486 --> 00:56:47,946 I did find something else. 770 00:56:50,448 --> 00:56:51,741 The date it happens. 771 00:57:03,753 --> 00:57:05,505 The world ends in eight days, 772 00:57:05,964 --> 00:57:07,882 and I have no idea how to stop it. 773 00:57:16,724 --> 00:57:18,476 I'll put on a pot of coffee. 774 00:57:20,061 --> 00:57:21,980 [rock violin music playing] 56648

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