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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:04,759 Thanks for coming so quickly. 2 00:00:04,760 --> 00:00:07,093 I just wanted to have a bit of a talk about the campaign. 3 00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:08,759 I've been looking over the books, 4 00:00:08,760 --> 00:00:10,839 and we've got a bit of a funding crisis. 5 00:00:10,840 --> 00:00:12,919 What? How much have we got left? 6 00:00:12,920 --> 00:00:14,119 Erm, none. 7 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:17,479 I mean, I've been doing my best to get donations from local grandees, 8 00:00:17,480 --> 00:00:20,479 but, you know, you have to take them out for nice dinners. 9 00:00:20,480 --> 00:00:23,799 I mean, I've had some amazing culinary experiences. 10 00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:26,631 - Right. - But it's very expensive. 11 00:00:26,632 --> 00:00:29,839 You know, and it's utterly inescapable. 12 00:00:29,840 --> 00:00:31,555 (PHONE BUZZES) 13 00:00:31,556 --> 00:00:32,919 Oh, hi! 14 00:00:32,920 --> 00:00:34,839 Lorna. 15 00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:38,538 Wow. Lorna, no way. 16 00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:41,999 No way. Marcus Costello! 17 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:47,079 Ken, this is Marcus. We went out briefly in college. 18 00:00:47,080 --> 00:00:48,319 Yeah, we did. 19 00:00:48,320 --> 00:00:51,199 Lorna was always the one that got away. 20 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:52,799 Oh, was she? 21 00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:54,879 Well... She's still away. 22 00:00:54,880 --> 00:00:57,919 So, how are you? What have you been up to? 23 00:00:57,920 --> 00:01:02,439 Well, you probably already know this, but I got involved 24 00:01:02,440 --> 00:01:03,880 in health foods. 25 00:01:05,040 --> 00:01:06,159 - No. - No. 26 00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:07,639 Well, I did. 27 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:10,319 Yeah, I started a chain of vegan stores. 28 00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:12,734 - Great Green Grains. - Nope. 29 00:01:12,735 --> 00:01:13,882 - No. - Not heard of them. 30 00:01:13,883 --> 00:01:17,159 Well, I sold that, for loads by the way, 31 00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:20,639 and now I invest in charities and good causes. 32 00:01:20,640 --> 00:01:22,519 You might have seen me on telly. 33 00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:24,239 No. 34 00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:26,159 - Really? - No, not once. 35 00:01:26,160 --> 00:01:27,719 - No, never. No. - No. 36 00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:30,279 Anyway, that's the story. 37 00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:32,999 Very rich, on telly. 38 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:34,835 - Oh. - What's yours? 39 00:01:34,836 --> 00:01:39,147 Yeah, erm... This is my other half Ken, and... 40 00:01:39,148 --> 00:01:42,199 Is he rich and on telly? 41 00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:43,399 Just kidding. 42 00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:45,436 OK, I'm just going to interrupt there 43 00:01:45,437 --> 00:01:48,879 to invite Marcus to dinner at yours on Wednesday. 44 00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:51,125 - Sorry, what's this? - Great, love to. 45 00:01:51,126 --> 00:01:54,159 Lorna, it'd be great to catch up. 46 00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:55,200 Lorna. 47 00:02:00,428 --> 00:02:01,987 What did you just do? 48 00:02:01,988 --> 00:02:04,234 It's your campaign. 49 00:02:04,235 --> 00:02:06,279 Marcus has got loads of money, you've got no money 50 00:02:06,280 --> 00:02:08,519 because somebody ate all the money in the nice dinners. 51 00:02:08,520 --> 00:02:10,039 Yes. That was you! 52 00:02:10,040 --> 00:02:12,553 Anyway I think it would be amazing for you to cook a lovely supper 53 00:02:12,554 --> 00:02:16,239 for your wife's rich ex-boyfriend, it'd be exciting. 54 00:02:16,240 --> 00:02:18,040 - (PHONE BUZZES) - Oh, hi! 55 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:21,719 At least I'll get a nice meal out of it, I suppose. 56 00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:23,279 I'll do that lamb kofta. 57 00:02:23,280 --> 00:02:24,599 He's a vegan! 58 00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:26,200 Oh, for fuck's sake. 59 00:02:26,695 --> 00:02:32,695 60 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:35,479 The things I do for campaign funding. 61 00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:37,959 Making tofu cacciatore! 62 00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:39,559 I don't know how people do it. 63 00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:42,359 Nope, no delicious steak for me, please, 64 00:02:42,360 --> 00:02:46,599 I would prefer wet, taste-free Chinese blancmange. 65 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:50,719 I can't believe we have to have Marcus Costello round. 66 00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:54,159 Gazing at me like I'm the Brummie Mona Lisa. 67 00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:56,159 Oh, where are you going? 68 00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:57,479 A brunch date. 69 00:02:57,480 --> 00:02:59,999 Local businessman, barely scrapes 10 million. 70 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:02,639 But my visa's up at the end of the month, 71 00:03:02,640 --> 00:03:04,959 and I have to be realistic. 72 00:03:04,960 --> 00:03:07,439 Ivy? Ready to roll? 73 00:03:07,440 --> 00:03:09,279 - Oh, hi, Steve. - Hey. 74 00:03:09,280 --> 00:03:10,839 - Nice outfit. - It's cool, isn't it? 75 00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:13,599 Ivy chose it for me. Very retro, very hipster. 76 00:03:13,600 --> 00:03:16,639 Hey, Steve, when you go for a drive in your new outfit, 77 00:03:16,640 --> 00:03:19,679 does my sister by chance just sit in the back and not speak to you? 78 00:03:19,680 --> 00:03:21,079 Yeah. 79 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:23,135 Good guessing, Ken. Very, very good guessing. 80 00:03:23,136 --> 00:03:26,799 Isn't he the most perfect, chivalrous English gentleman? 81 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:28,599 M'lady. 82 00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:31,081 Well, wish me luck everyone. 83 00:03:31,082 --> 00:03:32,768 I will be married by the end of the... 84 00:03:32,769 --> 00:03:35,919 - (PHONE CHIMES) - Oh, he cancelled. 85 00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:37,119 No! 86 00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:39,197 - What a shame. - Real shame. 87 00:03:39,198 --> 00:03:41,947 Well, I'm sure he'll rearrange. 88 00:03:41,948 --> 00:03:45,439 Oh, come on, Miss Tigglytops, it's a beautiful day. 89 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:47,760 Let's go outside and get some sunshine. 90 00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,319 Oi, oi, oi! Where are you going? 91 00:03:55,320 --> 00:03:57,159 I've got some ice lollies in your freezer. 92 00:03:57,160 --> 00:03:59,519 In MY freezer? Why aren't they in your freezer? 93 00:03:59,520 --> 00:04:01,599 Mine got busted about a month ago. 94 00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:04,359 I mistook it for an armed invader whilst drunk. 95 00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:06,060 Did quite a lot of damage. 96 00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:09,199 I'm in the friend zone, Ken. 97 00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:10,519 I'm just hanging there. 98 00:04:10,520 --> 00:04:11,919 What's wrong with me? 99 00:04:11,920 --> 00:04:13,639 There's nothing wrong with you, Steve. 100 00:04:13,640 --> 00:04:16,919 You're one of Jim Henson's most realistic creations. 101 00:04:16,920 --> 00:04:19,399 With her by my side, there is nothing I couldn't achieve. 102 00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:22,480 Right. I'm going to have my lunch in the garden. 103 00:04:24,120 --> 00:04:25,439 (DOORBELL RINGS) 104 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:27,520 I'll get it! It's Tash. 105 00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:31,753 I did it. I just left Ben. I said it's over. 106 00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:33,920 Well, you'd better come in then. 107 00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:41,644 - Oh, geez, what a relief. - It must be. 108 00:04:42,675 --> 00:04:44,479 How was Ben, was he OK? 109 00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:46,359 I've never seen him like that. 110 00:04:46,360 --> 00:04:47,999 He kicked over a Subbuteo table. 111 00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:49,120 Whoa. 112 00:04:50,680 --> 00:04:55,901 Oh, God, Tash, I feel so guilty. 113 00:04:56,618 --> 00:04:58,497 - But it's for the best. - Totally. 114 00:04:58,498 --> 00:04:59,519 Yeah. 115 00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:03,119 I got out of his house and I was just feeling so brave, you know. 116 00:05:03,120 --> 00:05:05,668 So I got on the phone and I told my parents. 117 00:05:05,669 --> 00:05:06,722 Wow! 118 00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:08,354 Sorry, what? You did what? 119 00:05:08,355 --> 00:05:12,160 There's no point in living in fear, Rach. It's you and me now. 120 00:05:13,669 --> 00:05:15,880 So, when are you coming out? 121 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:18,000 Coming out? 122 00:05:20,251 --> 00:05:23,838 Sorry, Tash, it's just I'm never sure I ever felt really in. 123 00:05:23,839 --> 00:05:26,361 Sexuality's, like, it's a fluid thing, isn't it? 124 00:05:26,362 --> 00:05:28,463 It's, like... Anyway, weren't we just going to keep it to ourselves 125 00:05:28,464 --> 00:05:30,347 for a while, you know, just for Ben's sake? 126 00:05:30,348 --> 00:05:31,959 Mm. 127 00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:33,433 I thought, like, a week. 128 00:05:33,434 --> 00:05:34,549 Right. 129 00:05:34,550 --> 00:05:36,799 Yeah, no, I was thinking more like... 130 00:05:36,800 --> 00:05:38,199 ...I don't know, three years. 131 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:40,000 (CAR APPROACHING) 132 00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:45,759 Shit, that's Ben's car. Hide. 133 00:05:45,760 --> 00:05:47,359 We should just tell him now. 134 00:05:47,360 --> 00:05:50,080 No! It can wait. Get under the duvet. 135 00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:54,280 Hide? 136 00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:08,919 Hey. 137 00:06:08,920 --> 00:06:10,599 You... Give me that! 138 00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:12,217 - Tigglytops! - Hey! 139 00:06:12,218 --> 00:06:13,639 You give me that! 140 00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:15,240 Give me that! 141 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:18,719 Great, that's gone. 142 00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:20,519 Poor baby! 143 00:06:20,520 --> 00:06:22,839 Ken, you monster. 144 00:06:22,840 --> 00:06:23,919 What have you done? 145 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:25,599 What have I done?! 146 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:29,239 Oh, dear Lord. Did she eat any of this? 147 00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:32,719 - What? - Ken, how could you? 148 00:06:32,720 --> 00:06:35,392 It's got gluten! 149 00:06:36,680 --> 00:06:38,439 You monster! 150 00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:40,399 Is the vet really necessary? 151 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:43,319 Gosh, honey, I'm so sorry. 152 00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:45,634 We'll be at the vet very soon. 153 00:06:45,635 --> 00:06:48,079 Yes. I know. 154 00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:50,463 My brother is a horrible person. 155 00:06:51,174 --> 00:06:53,959 Just say your mantras and stay balanced. 156 00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:56,439 Have a little tinkle on the upholstery if it feels good, 157 00:06:56,440 --> 00:06:59,040 - he won't mind. - I'll mind. I'll mind. 158 00:07:03,940 --> 00:07:06,260 BEN: I just never saw it coming. 159 00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:10,062 One minute we were watching Aston Villa's 100 Greatest Goals, 160 00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:13,899 and the next she's saying our relationship is uninspiring. 161 00:07:13,900 --> 00:07:15,158 Oh! 162 00:07:15,159 --> 00:07:16,679 I mean, explain that. 163 00:07:16,680 --> 00:07:18,719 So out of the blue. 164 00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:21,400 Literally, for all of us. 165 00:07:22,688 --> 00:07:24,247 No-one could have known. 166 00:07:24,248 --> 00:07:28,344 I just haven't felt this bad since you cheated on me with Dale. 167 00:07:29,409 --> 00:07:31,274 Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. 168 00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:40,919 Thank you for paying for the vet. 169 00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:44,439 So what is the point of free health care that's only for humans? 170 00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:45,759 Yeah. 171 00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:47,039 My pleasure, though. 172 00:07:47,040 --> 00:07:50,479 Well, apparently the vet's going to have to put a camera 173 00:07:50,480 --> 00:07:51,879 up her backside. 174 00:07:51,880 --> 00:07:53,039 Oh, no. 175 00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:54,359 I know. 176 00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:58,702 And he asked me if it was OK if he gave her local anaesthetic. 177 00:07:58,703 --> 00:08:01,559 So I asked him, would she feel any pain? 178 00:08:01,560 --> 00:08:04,899 - Yeah. - And he was like, "Some." 179 00:08:05,438 --> 00:08:09,273 And, Ken, I just don't want her to feel any pain. 180 00:08:09,274 --> 00:08:11,359 I know, I know. 181 00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:13,639 So, I say to him, 182 00:08:13,640 --> 00:08:16,199 "Put her to sleep." 183 00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:19,159 And he's all like, "She doesn't need to be put to sleep." 184 00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:23,399 And I'm, "My dog is in pain, put her to sleep!" 185 00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:26,519 And he was like, "What if you change your mind?" 186 00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:29,679 And I was like, "Why would I change my mind?" 187 00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:30,799 OK, I'm sorry, Ivy, 188 00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:33,399 did you tell the vet to put Miss Tigglytops to sleep? 189 00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:34,429 Yes! 190 00:08:34,430 --> 00:08:38,399 Otherwise she is going to witness a probe going up her butthole! 191 00:08:38,400 --> 00:08:40,835 I mean, how inhumane is that?! 192 00:08:40,836 --> 00:08:43,799 Yeah, yeah, yeah, but were those the words you used, "put her to sleep"? 193 00:08:43,800 --> 00:08:47,000 Yes, and I had to say it many times. 194 00:08:50,720 --> 00:08:52,639 Miss Tigglytops was... 195 00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:54,399 ...a dog. 196 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:56,539 And some might say not human. 197 00:08:57,520 --> 00:08:59,900 But if you prick a dog, does she not bleed? 198 00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:03,520 If you forget to feed her, does she not starve? 199 00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:08,919 And all these things that make us human, 200 00:09:08,920 --> 00:09:10,479 emotions, friendship, 201 00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:12,319 love of vigorous exercise, 202 00:09:12,320 --> 00:09:16,360 biscuits, Miss Tigglytops had all these and more. 203 00:09:17,480 --> 00:09:21,880 So I say to the naysayers loud and clear, not human? 204 00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:24,720 She was the best man among us. 205 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:34,799 Oh, Danny boy 206 00:09:34,800 --> 00:09:40,760 The pipes, the pipes are calling... 207 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:49,999 Ken, what am I doing? 208 00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:53,799 My husband's abandoned me, I'm living in this backwater 209 00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:56,617 far from civilisation without any money and now, 210 00:09:56,618 --> 00:09:58,639 I have killed my best friend. 211 00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:01,279 Yeah, that is quite depressing when you put it like that. 212 00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:04,559 Miss Tigglytops was all I had left. 213 00:10:04,560 --> 00:10:09,079 Oh, I know, she could be hypercritical, pompous, 214 00:10:09,080 --> 00:10:11,266 stuck in her ideas. 215 00:10:11,267 --> 00:10:13,559 I mean, I never really saw that side of her. 216 00:10:13,560 --> 00:10:15,868 You're being kind. 217 00:10:16,501 --> 00:10:20,119 She was the only one to ever show me any real affection, 218 00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,079 my only family. 219 00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:25,759 Hey! Now, we're your family, too. 220 00:10:25,760 --> 00:10:29,930 OK, so you hold some deranged views, like, mad. 221 00:10:30,610 --> 00:10:31,959 But we're here for you. 222 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:33,920 That's so kind. 223 00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:38,279 But it doesn't really make any difference, does it? 224 00:10:38,280 --> 00:10:40,839 Who am I kidding with this visa situation? 225 00:10:40,840 --> 00:10:43,599 I'm never going to find an Englishman to marry me. 226 00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:45,126 Well, you say that. 227 00:10:46,240 --> 00:10:48,680 I mean, there is someone who might be persuaded. 228 00:10:53,240 --> 00:10:54,719 Oh, God. 229 00:10:54,720 --> 00:10:57,000 There has got to be a better way. 230 00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:12,799 Are you still up? 231 00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:14,839 Yeah. 232 00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:18,915 Mum, how long do you think you need to wait before you move on? 233 00:11:19,770 --> 00:11:21,130 Oh, Rach. 234 00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:23,600 God knows, love. 235 00:11:25,813 --> 00:11:28,412 I had my heart broken back at uni. 236 00:11:28,413 --> 00:11:31,319 Told myself I was over it and that's how I ended up 237 00:11:31,320 --> 00:11:34,559 with tomorrow's dinner guest, Marcus Twatface Costello. 238 00:11:34,560 --> 00:11:37,798 - Oh, God. That didn't end well, then. - No. 239 00:11:38,120 --> 00:11:42,359 No, I woke up one morning and I just thought, "Whoa! 240 00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:44,599 "This guy is not my type." 241 00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:47,359 Too smooth. I like my men... 242 00:11:47,360 --> 00:11:48,439 ...craggy. 243 00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:50,560 Mm, I can see that. 244 00:11:51,665 --> 00:11:55,599 Looking back, I think I just went for something completely different. 245 00:11:55,600 --> 00:11:58,877 Like if I ran in the opposite direction, I wouldn't get hurt. 246 00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:01,680 - Stupid, of course. - Yeah. 247 00:12:03,560 --> 00:12:05,399 Stupid. 248 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,639 Yeah. 249 00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:09,359 So stupid. 250 00:12:09,360 --> 00:12:11,159 Really super stupid. 251 00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:13,279 Well, quite stupid. 252 00:12:13,280 --> 00:12:14,999 It's just proper stupid! 253 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:16,839 Stupid, stupid, stupid! 254 00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:18,199 Right, yeah. 255 00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:19,240 Thanks for that. 256 00:12:25,988 --> 00:12:27,388 Stupid. 257 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:35,719 Steve! 258 00:12:35,720 --> 00:12:38,479 You have to stop coming round in the middle of the night, 259 00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:40,119 what are you doing in the freezer? 260 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:41,959 Lorna! 261 00:12:41,960 --> 00:12:44,599 Mine's still out of action, so... 262 00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:49,319 Night-night, Lorna, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite. 263 00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:50,800 Night, Steve. 264 00:12:58,400 --> 00:13:00,719 She was so young! 265 00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:03,599 And the tragedy is, if this had happened two months ago, 266 00:13:03,600 --> 00:13:05,199 she could have been preserved! 267 00:13:05,200 --> 00:13:06,639 How do you mean preserved? 268 00:13:06,640 --> 00:13:08,559 By the Mittelfart Foundation. 269 00:13:08,560 --> 00:13:10,839 We had cryogenic facilities to store her 270 00:13:10,840 --> 00:13:13,239 until scientists cure dog death. 271 00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:19,400 And now there is no hope of us ever being reunited in another century. 272 00:13:43,110 --> 00:13:45,119 This is what it's come to, Rach. 273 00:13:45,120 --> 00:13:46,399 Cooking my arse off 274 00:13:46,400 --> 00:13:48,959 for some rich vegan who's got the hots for your mum. 275 00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:50,160 Yeah. 276 00:13:51,720 --> 00:13:52,840 Oh! 277 00:13:54,600 --> 00:13:56,199 Mum, is that what you're wearing? 278 00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:58,799 Oldest, tattiest thing I could find. 279 00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:01,319 I don't want Marcus getting any ideas. 280 00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:04,199 Look, all we need to do is just be pleasant for an evening 281 00:14:04,200 --> 00:14:06,559 and then right at the end, ask the twat for money. 282 00:14:06,560 --> 00:14:08,840 - (DOORBELL RINGS) - Oh, that'll be Tash. 283 00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:12,679 Hi. 284 00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:14,599 - All right, Tash? - Hello, Tash. 285 00:14:14,600 --> 00:14:16,119 Ben not with you tonight? 286 00:14:16,120 --> 00:14:18,839 Oh, I split up with Ben. 287 00:14:18,840 --> 00:14:23,799 Oh, really? Oh, poor Ben, what happened? 288 00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:26,999 All right, Mum! Bloody hell, don't give her the third degree, 289 00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:30,639 it's pretty raw. Come on, matey, let's go to my room, 290 00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:31,880 look at Facebook. 291 00:14:38,280 --> 00:14:41,033 Matey? You should just tell them! 292 00:14:41,034 --> 00:14:45,599 Tash, didn't we talk about this, about keeping it on the down-low? 293 00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:48,486 Yeah, I was thinking that you're wrong. 294 00:14:48,487 --> 00:14:51,962 Let's just do it, like, I love Rachel Thompson! 295 00:14:51,963 --> 00:14:53,159 Shush! 296 00:14:54,320 --> 00:14:55,360 Sorry... 297 00:14:56,600 --> 00:14:57,999 You love me? 298 00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,799 Well, obviously we love each other! 299 00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:03,719 Oh, so many things ahead, like living together, 300 00:15:03,720 --> 00:15:04,959 maybe in Berlin. 301 00:15:04,960 --> 00:15:06,399 Kids... 302 00:15:06,400 --> 00:15:09,959 You know, I'd be happy to adopt a refugee baby with you. 303 00:15:09,960 --> 00:15:11,120 OK, stop. 304 00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:13,680 Tash... 305 00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:17,159 Tash, sorry, this is all just going really fast! 306 00:15:17,160 --> 00:15:18,760 I mean, it's just ideas. 307 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:22,279 Tash, two weeks ago, we were just friends! 308 00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:24,319 It just feels like a really big leap! 309 00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:26,843 Rach, there is nothing to be scared about. 310 00:15:26,844 --> 00:15:28,208 Look, all I'm saying is... 311 00:15:31,400 --> 00:15:33,319 ...I don't know what I want. 312 00:15:33,320 --> 00:15:35,559 I'm only just getting over Dale. 313 00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:39,519 Can we not just go back to, you know, being friends? 314 00:15:39,520 --> 00:15:41,319 And then maybe in a couple of months... 315 00:15:41,320 --> 00:15:43,039 So you don't love me. 316 00:15:43,040 --> 00:15:44,400 You're just playing around. 317 00:15:45,680 --> 00:15:46,960 Not deliberately. 318 00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:54,720 (IVY HUMS) 319 00:15:58,160 --> 00:16:00,160 Deep breath in. 320 00:16:02,285 --> 00:16:05,737 And remember to balance your chakras, Miss Tiggly... 321 00:16:07,440 --> 00:16:08,999 ...tops. 322 00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:11,279 Ivy, no words. 323 00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:13,079 I need you to come with me. 324 00:16:13,080 --> 00:16:14,879 What? 325 00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:16,360 Now! 326 00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:22,000 - Where are we going? - You'll see. 327 00:16:26,137 --> 00:16:27,296 Lorna. 328 00:16:27,297 --> 00:16:29,448 - Marcus. - So good to see you. 329 00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:33,908 - Flowers... - Oh! 330 00:16:33,909 --> 00:16:35,359 Wine... 331 00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:38,639 - Right. - And a sugar-free cake. 332 00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:42,639 It has a taste completely different to real cake. 333 00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:45,519 Well, that sounds delicious! 334 00:16:45,520 --> 00:16:47,679 I just think it's important we should stay in shape 335 00:16:47,680 --> 00:16:49,119 for ourselves and our loved ones. 336 00:16:49,120 --> 00:16:50,619 Couldn't agree more. 337 00:16:50,620 --> 00:16:52,159 Shall I take it? 338 00:16:52,160 --> 00:16:53,560 - Shall I take the wine? - Yes. 339 00:16:55,120 --> 00:16:57,560 So, you remembered. 340 00:16:58,474 --> 00:17:00,464 - Remembered what? - The cardie. 341 00:17:01,048 --> 00:17:03,088 You wore it on our first date together. 342 00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:05,971 It was special for me, too. 343 00:17:07,240 --> 00:17:09,439 Can I use the little boys' room? 344 00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:10,759 Yeah, yeah. 345 00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:12,160 Just... 346 00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:22,119 Ken, is your campaign really worth this? 347 00:17:22,120 --> 00:17:24,039 It's like you're pimping me out! 348 00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:27,079 Calm down. I'm going to sit him next to Tash during the meal! 349 00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:29,719 They can have sanctimony pie together. It's going to be fine. 350 00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:32,800 I promise you, it's not going to be at all awkward. 351 00:17:39,520 --> 00:17:44,279 That was a great starter, Ken. That Hollandaise was delicious. 352 00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:45,919 Let me... 353 00:17:45,920 --> 00:17:48,200 Turmeric, cayenne... 354 00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:52,999 ...cashew butter. 355 00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:54,999 Spot on! 356 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,959 Oh, you're good. Isn't he good? 357 00:17:56,960 --> 00:17:58,599 Oh, yeah, really good, yeah. 358 00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:02,199 You see, people say to me, they say vegan food means less tasty. 359 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:05,599 But actually your taste buds become more sensitive. 360 00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:08,479 This wine, for example, it's piss. 361 00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:10,959 But it's probably OK for you. 362 00:18:10,960 --> 00:18:13,348 Yeah. No, it is. 363 00:18:13,349 --> 00:18:14,759 For me. 364 00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:16,489 Well... main course? 365 00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:19,719 Are you vegan, Rachel? 366 00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:23,074 Yeah, sort of vegan. You know, I try, some days. 367 00:18:23,075 --> 00:18:24,879 That's interesting, Rachel. 368 00:18:24,880 --> 00:18:27,653 So you're sort of pretend vegan, then. 369 00:18:27,654 --> 00:18:30,720 Hanging out with vegans and then flaking out. 370 00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:35,919 Mm-hm. Yeah, that's a really good way of putting it, Tash. 371 00:18:35,920 --> 00:18:37,720 Here we are! 372 00:18:38,800 --> 00:18:41,519 Oh, that smells delicious, Dad! 373 00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:43,039 No, no, no. 374 00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:45,319 With my nonna's cacciatore, 375 00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:48,479 we always try the sauce with the bread first. 376 00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:49,560 Like this. 377 00:18:53,240 --> 00:18:54,839 Fingers crossed. 378 00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:56,040 That is... 379 00:18:57,280 --> 00:18:58,560 - Wow. - Ah! 380 00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:01,999 Now I see what you see in him, Lorna! 381 00:19:02,360 --> 00:19:03,959 I didn't at first. 382 00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:06,254 I've never tasted cacciatore like it. 383 00:19:06,255 --> 00:19:10,199 Not a single living, screaming being involved. 384 00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:11,599 Bravo. 385 00:19:11,600 --> 00:19:12,999 (KNOCKING) 386 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:14,992 - Who's that? - Let me in! 387 00:19:14,993 --> 00:19:16,294 Sorry. 388 00:19:18,579 --> 00:19:21,198 - Ben, what are you doing here? - Fulfilling my destiny, Ken. 389 00:19:21,199 --> 00:19:24,479 Where is she? Where is the most amazing girl in the world? 390 00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:25,679 Ben... 391 00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:28,199 Tash, I am not letting you get away. 392 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:32,959 You say you don't want me, but I am not losing you. 393 00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:34,879 I'm sorry, I'm snotty but... 394 00:19:34,880 --> 00:19:36,599 Ben, this is not very dignified. 395 00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:40,519 Tash, I may not be the most fashionable man 396 00:19:40,520 --> 00:19:42,799 or the best looking man, 397 00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:48,886 but I am an extremely dependable lawyer. 398 00:19:48,887 --> 00:19:53,479 And I've had a few pints and suddenly, it came to me. 399 00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:57,199 I had to come here, I had to, I had to... 400 00:19:57,200 --> 00:19:59,479 Oh, God, Ben, no. 401 00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:02,559 Tash, please, marry me! 402 00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:05,080 Please! Please! Please! 403 00:20:13,640 --> 00:20:14,680 Yes. 404 00:20:15,920 --> 00:20:18,399 Yes! I'll marry you, Ben. 405 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:19,999 Really? 406 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:21,439 You're not playing around. 407 00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:22,600 This is awesome! 408 00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:25,639 Are you serious? 409 00:20:25,640 --> 00:20:28,479 Let's get out of here, eh? 410 00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:30,999 Couldn't have put it better myself! 411 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:32,919 Goodbye, Ken, goodbye, Lorna! 412 00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:35,520 - Bye, Ben! - I'm getting bloody married! 413 00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:42,320 (SOBBING) 414 00:20:46,760 --> 00:20:48,280 I'm so sorry. 415 00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:50,559 It's just... 416 00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:52,363 ...he fought for her. 417 00:20:52,364 --> 00:20:53,879 Oh... 418 00:20:53,880 --> 00:20:56,934 He didn't just let her go like me. 419 00:20:58,040 --> 00:21:01,079 I never deserved you, Lorna. 420 00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:05,480 Ken, I have been a prick. 421 00:21:05,481 --> 00:21:08,279 - No, no. - Whatever you want for your campaign, 422 00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:10,200 I'll write you a cheque. 423 00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:13,959 Really? Really?! 424 00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:16,439 - Yes. - That's great! 425 00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:20,160 That's unexpected, that's... So... 426 00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:23,800 Turned out all right! 427 00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:31,479 Ah, Mr Chance. 428 00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:33,199 And you must be Miss Mittelfart. 429 00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:34,480 - Come in, please. - Thank you. 430 00:21:34,481 --> 00:21:35,599 Just wait here. 431 00:21:35,600 --> 00:21:38,359 Steve, what's going on? It's cold in here. 432 00:21:38,360 --> 00:21:41,559 I couldn't bear to see you upset about Miss Tigglytops. 433 00:21:41,560 --> 00:21:44,599 So I phoned up these cryogenic guys 434 00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:46,239 and I got myself a deal! 435 00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:49,759 - Oh, you... - I cryogenically froze your dog, yes! 436 00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:51,839 But I could only afford the head, so I kept her 437 00:21:51,840 --> 00:21:54,599 in Ken's freezer overnight and brought her here this afternoon. 438 00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:57,239 Oh, Steve, that is so touching. 439 00:21:57,240 --> 00:21:59,457 I just wanted you to know how much I care. 440 00:21:59,458 --> 00:22:02,239 - I'm here for you, Ivy. - You are, aren't you? 441 00:22:02,240 --> 00:22:04,520 My hairy little knight. 442 00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:08,903 - Steve... - Yes. 443 00:22:09,480 --> 00:22:11,473 Would you consider marrying me? 444 00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:14,519 - Yes! - Oh, strictly for visa considerations. 445 00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:16,919 I'm not attracted to you in the least. 446 00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:18,759 Quite the opposite, in fact. 447 00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:20,708 Well, it doesn't matter, I've got years to turn that around. 448 00:22:20,709 --> 00:22:22,036 - But you won't. - But I might. 449 00:22:22,037 --> 00:22:23,817 - Not going to happen. - However you want it. 450 00:22:23,818 --> 00:22:26,359 Mr Chance, there seems to be a slight problem. 451 00:22:26,360 --> 00:22:29,960 Are you sure this is what you wanted us to freeze? 452 00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:34,239 What is that? 453 00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:38,091 I'm no expert but it looks like tofu cacciatore. 454 00:22:39,669 --> 00:22:42,159 Let's celebrate, why not? 455 00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:43,999 Shall we? 456 00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:46,839 Get it open, Ken, I can hardly wait! 457 00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:48,080 What a night! 458 00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:51,319 - Oh! - Argh! 459 00:22:51,320 --> 00:22:52,879 LORNA: Anyone for more vino? 460 00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:54,079 (SHE SHRIEKS) 461 00:22:54,080 --> 00:22:55,359 What is it? 462 00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:57,400 God, I tasted it! 463 00:22:59,120 --> 00:23:01,560 What is this? Some kind of carnivore joke? 464 00:23:01,561 --> 00:23:02,574 No, it's... 465 00:23:02,575 --> 00:23:04,759 Who makes fun of a vegan by serving him the head of a dog? 466 00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:06,160 I think... 467 00:23:07,635 --> 00:23:10,162 Lorna, you've changed. 468 00:23:10,844 --> 00:23:12,444 You would never have done this. 469 00:23:13,880 --> 00:23:17,439 Oh, erm, the cheque, though, cos... 470 00:23:17,440 --> 00:23:19,399 Oh, Ken. 471 00:23:19,400 --> 00:23:20,600 Ah! 472 00:23:20,601 --> 00:23:22,601 473 00:23:22,651 --> 00:23:27,201 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 33415

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