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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,992 --> 00:00:05,459 She's my sister, Lorna. 2 00:00:05,460 --> 00:00:07,452 Well, half sister. 3 00:00:07,453 --> 00:00:09,599 Ken, she's bossing me around in my home. 4 00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:12,959 She's even taken to creeping in uninvited, like Nosferatu. 5 00:00:12,960 --> 00:00:15,839 Well, that doesn't even work cos vampires have to be invited in. 6 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:17,116 Thank you. Good point, Rachel. 7 00:00:17,117 --> 00:00:19,239 Still, I don't want her here. 8 00:00:19,240 --> 00:00:20,960 - She's a bad influence. - (DOOR SLAMS) 9 00:00:21,960 --> 00:00:24,519 - Aw, Dylan! - Well, I think she's pretty cool. 10 00:00:24,520 --> 00:00:26,759 Dylan, she tried to turn you into a weed dealer. 11 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:30,839 Er, yes, and that is the most gangster thing I have ever done. 12 00:00:30,840 --> 00:00:32,953 Don't say gangster, please, you're from Lichfield. 13 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:35,759 Rachel, you know what I'm saying, don't you? 14 00:00:35,760 --> 00:00:39,233 I mean, don't you find Ivy a bit meddly? 15 00:00:39,234 --> 00:00:41,159 Well, all I know is she always seems to smell of 16 00:00:41,160 --> 00:00:43,119 whatever toiletries I've recently lost. 17 00:00:43,120 --> 00:00:45,039 See, Ken, she's dodgy. 18 00:00:45,040 --> 00:00:46,639 She's my flesh and blood. 19 00:00:46,640 --> 00:00:48,919 No, Ken, she wanted to buy your flesh and blood. 20 00:00:48,920 --> 00:00:52,999 Oh, come on, that was just a harmless... sibling... 21 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:54,439 It was weird, wasn't it? 22 00:00:54,440 --> 00:00:55,759 That was weird, actually. 23 00:00:55,760 --> 00:00:56,984 - Yeah. - Bit weird. 24 00:00:56,985 --> 00:00:58,081 It's really weird. 25 00:00:58,082 --> 00:01:04,082 26 00:01:04,989 --> 00:01:06,509 You snogged? 27 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:12,720 I just don't want you to feel, you know, cheated on. 28 00:01:14,059 --> 00:01:15,819 (HE LAUGHS) 29 00:01:17,694 --> 00:01:20,749 Ha-ha! Oh, honestly, no. 30 00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:24,439 It's an unwritten rule, lesbianism doesn't count. 31 00:01:24,440 --> 00:01:26,799 - Oh, Jesus... - OK, let him off. 32 00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:28,399 So, you get it. 33 00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:29,719 Of course. 34 00:01:29,720 --> 00:01:33,320 You were as high as a Gulf Stream 600 and in the moment... 35 00:01:35,520 --> 00:01:36,679 So... 36 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:40,039 ...who, er, kissed who first? 37 00:01:40,040 --> 00:01:41,359 Was... 38 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:43,719 - Morning, young people. - Ivy, hi! 39 00:01:43,720 --> 00:01:48,599 I will not get up right now, if that's OK. 40 00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:50,999 Rachel, something good happened to you. 41 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:52,839 - You're glowing. - Oh! 42 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:54,779 You could pass for 29. 43 00:01:54,780 --> 00:01:55,959 I'm 27. 44 00:01:55,960 --> 00:01:58,279 Oh, God. Let's learn from this. 45 00:01:58,280 --> 00:02:01,185 I need more tact, you need more skincare. 46 00:02:01,186 --> 00:02:04,079 Anyway, I'm having a meeting in here in a couple of minutes 47 00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:06,639 with your father, to brief him for his newspaper interview. 48 00:02:06,640 --> 00:02:08,239 So y'all need to get out of here. 49 00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:09,719 Out! 50 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:11,200 All right. 51 00:02:12,640 --> 00:02:14,879 Lorna, you can't come in, meeting's starting soon. 52 00:02:14,880 --> 00:02:16,199 Go on, scoot! 53 00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:18,159 - Scoop, scoot, scoot, scoot! - Scoot?! 54 00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:20,840 (MUSIC: Loser by Beck) 55 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:24,560 (HE SIGHS) 56 00:02:25,760 --> 00:02:30,279 Soy un perdedor 57 00:02:30,280 --> 00:02:33,519 I'm a loser, baby 58 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:37,359 So why don't you kill me? 59 00:02:37,360 --> 00:02:39,719 I look like a smart-casual walrus. 60 00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:41,200 Oh. 61 00:02:42,920 --> 00:02:45,919 - Wear this one. - It's just so plain. 62 00:02:45,920 --> 00:02:47,039 And very you. 63 00:02:47,040 --> 00:02:49,519 - This Lucy woman is going to like you. - You think? 64 00:02:49,520 --> 00:02:52,079 Lorna, she's the editor of the Lichfield Argus. 65 00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:55,239 If I impress her, it could be really big for the election. 66 00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:57,079 Maybe I should go and buy a new suit. 67 00:02:57,080 --> 00:02:58,599 Don't waste the money, Ken. 68 00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:00,319 I just... 69 00:03:00,320 --> 00:03:02,759 I just want something with a bit of a wow factor. 70 00:03:02,760 --> 00:03:06,239 This isn't flashy but it's... it's reliable. 71 00:03:06,240 --> 00:03:08,159 It's unthreatening. 72 00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:09,400 Like you. 73 00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:11,800 And... 74 00:03:13,240 --> 00:03:15,280 ...very sexy and very good in bed. 75 00:03:17,720 --> 00:03:19,080 Come on, Lorn. 76 00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:28,399 Just goes to show, we were getting all worried about that kiss 77 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:31,359 - but Ben was absolutely fine. - God, yeah. 78 00:03:31,360 --> 00:03:33,999 Just, by the way, you're quite a good kisser. 79 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,559 Oh, thank you! 80 00:03:35,560 --> 00:03:37,079 You're quite a good kisser, too. 81 00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:38,560 - (PHONE ALERT RINGS) - Oh. 82 00:03:41,800 --> 00:03:43,079 Oh, wow. 83 00:03:43,080 --> 00:03:45,199 The architect guy has asked me out on a date. 84 00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:46,400 Let me see. 85 00:03:48,914 --> 00:03:50,314 - Wow. - Yeah, I know. 86 00:03:51,520 --> 00:03:52,893 Well... 87 00:03:53,519 --> 00:03:55,198 Should I go? 88 00:03:55,199 --> 00:03:56,759 Go? 89 00:03:56,760 --> 00:04:00,079 God, yeah, like... How couldn't you go? 90 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:01,200 I guess I'll go. 91 00:04:06,920 --> 00:04:08,439 Ooh! 92 00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:11,079 - How did the meeting go? - Terrible. 93 00:04:11,080 --> 00:04:13,519 At the end, when I asked if I could count on her support, 94 00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:15,879 she just looked out of the window and sighed. 95 00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:18,447 A wistful, happy sigh? 96 00:04:18,448 --> 00:04:20,599 No, she just thought I was meh. 97 00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:22,879 I told you I should've bought a new suit. 98 00:04:22,880 --> 00:04:25,639 And maybe not met her in Wetherspoons. 99 00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:27,039 You can't be serious. 100 00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:28,319 - See? - WHISPERS: Nosferatu. 101 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:31,159 - Come on. - You went to a meeting in that suit? 102 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:32,799 No wonder she didn't back you. 103 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:35,439 I don't even know where you would get something like that. 104 00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:38,119 Well, Lorna bought it. She buys all my clothes. 105 00:04:38,120 --> 00:04:39,599 Well, yeah, which is not easy. 106 00:04:39,600 --> 00:04:41,999 There's only one website that sells suits for his frame. 107 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:44,559 What's that site called again, Dad? Isn't it moobs.com? 108 00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:46,719 Yeah, and where do you go? Twat.face? 109 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:48,319 Yeah, I do, actually. 110 00:04:48,320 --> 00:04:50,159 But not for clothes. 111 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:52,439 - Oh... - Maybe it's for the best, Ken. 112 00:04:52,440 --> 00:04:55,999 If Lucy Merriweather wants to support a flashy MP candidate, 113 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:57,679 well, then, that's not you, is it? 114 00:04:57,680 --> 00:05:00,039 You can't change yourself to suit the public mood. 115 00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:01,799 That's exactly how politics works. 116 00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:04,439 Oh, my God, it's you! 117 00:05:04,440 --> 00:05:07,039 You're the reason that Ken hasn't achieved anything 118 00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:08,639 his whole entire life. 119 00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:10,159 Hey, I have achieved some things! 120 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:11,759 What do you mean, I'm the reason? 121 00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:14,159 Your small-town vibe is holding him back. 122 00:05:14,160 --> 00:05:17,119 Buying his clothes and accepting his failures. 123 00:05:17,120 --> 00:05:18,799 This is Big Jack's son! 124 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:21,120 He should be out shaking the world. 125 00:05:21,121 --> 00:05:23,199 Not settling for this. 126 00:05:23,200 --> 00:05:25,039 He has achieved things, actually. 127 00:05:25,040 --> 00:05:28,079 Ken has a wonderful, loving family. 128 00:05:28,080 --> 00:05:31,759 You know who says the greatest achievement is their family? 129 00:05:31,760 --> 00:05:33,079 Losers. 130 00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:36,319 Usain Bolt doesn't gloat about his family. 131 00:05:36,320 --> 00:05:39,719 He gloats about being the fastest man in the world. 132 00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:41,159 And then he does this. 133 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:43,799 And everyone cheers. 134 00:05:43,800 --> 00:05:46,040 You once met, you know, what's his name? 135 00:05:46,041 --> 00:05:46,839 Alan Shearer. 136 00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:49,359 - And he told you what? - He said I had a firm handshake. 137 00:05:49,360 --> 00:05:50,639 Exactly. 138 00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:52,799 So, everyone ready for tonight? 139 00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:54,718 God, what are you talking about? 140 00:05:54,719 --> 00:05:58,520 Ivy's big divorce party at Chez Chance? 141 00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:01,805 - I'm sure she told you about it. - She didn't. 142 00:06:01,806 --> 00:06:03,984 - And I wouldn't go anyway. - That wasn't a joke? 143 00:06:03,985 --> 00:06:05,719 It's hard to know when you mean things, 144 00:06:05,720 --> 00:06:07,610 because you say a lot of weird stuff. 145 00:06:07,611 --> 00:06:08,477 Oh, thank you. 146 00:06:08,478 --> 00:06:10,219 You didn't say your divorce had come through. 147 00:06:10,220 --> 00:06:12,844 Yeah, yesterday. All done, not a big deal. 148 00:06:12,845 --> 00:06:14,953 Still, 30 years of marriage. 149 00:06:14,954 --> 00:06:17,439 That's what I'm saying, she needs to mark the moment. 150 00:06:17,440 --> 00:06:20,079 Which is why I'm throwing the shindig to help her through 151 00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:22,319 that transition into singledom, 152 00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:26,439 and maybe even help her find a new mate. 153 00:06:26,440 --> 00:06:28,559 Well, if you must. 154 00:06:28,560 --> 00:06:30,249 But, really, it's nothing. 155 00:06:30,250 --> 00:06:31,839 I'm not going to miss Ron. 156 00:06:31,840 --> 00:06:34,239 His affairs, his love of control, 157 00:06:34,240 --> 00:06:37,079 his fraudulent schemes... which I didn't know about. 158 00:06:37,080 --> 00:06:39,719 I've invited all the divorcees from my support group, 159 00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:41,199 so they all know the territory. 160 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:44,399 I mean, Lucy Merriweather had a cracking divorce. 161 00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:47,039 I mean, she got the white goods and everything. 162 00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:49,679 Lucy Merriweather from the Lichfield Argus? 163 00:06:49,680 --> 00:06:51,199 Well, we won't come. 164 00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:52,639 She was nasty to Ken. 165 00:06:52,640 --> 00:06:54,039 There you go again. 166 00:06:54,040 --> 00:06:55,719 - What? - Holding him back. 167 00:06:55,720 --> 00:06:57,639 Can't you see this is an opportunity? 168 00:06:57,640 --> 00:06:59,639 Oh, I think I fluffed it. 169 00:06:59,640 --> 00:07:03,999 Ken, you're going to go to that party, in an amazing suit, 170 00:07:04,000 --> 00:07:06,479 and you're going to seduce this Lucy Merriweather 171 00:07:06,480 --> 00:07:09,799 into supporting you. Now, where's the closest Macy's? 172 00:07:09,800 --> 00:07:11,439 New York. 173 00:07:11,440 --> 00:07:13,479 Moss Bros is open till eight. 174 00:07:13,480 --> 00:07:14,719 We'll find somewhere. 175 00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:17,720 Come on, Kenny, let's make you a new man. 176 00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:21,172 Ah, Lorna, come here. 177 00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:23,200 No, Steve. 178 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:31,319 I think we should try a pinstripe. 179 00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:36,119 A muted tone but with a pink thread and a matching lining. 180 00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:38,479 Which one of these catches your eye? 181 00:07:38,480 --> 00:07:39,999 None of them. 182 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:41,399 This is ridiculous. 183 00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:43,199 Stop resisting, Ken. 184 00:07:43,200 --> 00:07:47,039 We are here to turn you into the man that you were destined to be, 185 00:07:47,040 --> 00:07:51,519 and that man deserves a bit of attention. 186 00:07:51,520 --> 00:07:53,999 A bit of luxury, a bit of... 187 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:55,799 Scotch, sir? 188 00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:57,200 Thank you. 189 00:08:00,780 --> 00:08:02,395 That IS peaty. 190 00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:07,360 Show me the blue again. 191 00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:15,679 Lorna, take a look at your new husband! 192 00:08:15,680 --> 00:08:17,599 Well, hello, Miss Moneypenny. 193 00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:19,799 Ugh! It's hurting my eyes. 194 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:22,639 - No, I don't like it. - Come on, Lorn, it's only me. 195 00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:25,119 No, no, don't hug me, Ken! 196 00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:27,359 God, you look... different. 197 00:08:27,360 --> 00:08:29,159 I knew the electric blue was too much. 198 00:08:29,160 --> 00:08:30,479 It's because I had that scotch. 199 00:08:30,480 --> 00:08:32,599 I never would have gone for it if I hadn't had that. 200 00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:35,919 This is good. Proof of concept. This is what we want, Ken. 201 00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:38,079 What? For my own wife to be disgusted by me? 202 00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:39,359 Yes, Ken! 203 00:08:39,360 --> 00:08:41,279 You're looking at me like I'm a fart. 204 00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:43,479 Take it off. Take it off and take it back. 205 00:08:43,480 --> 00:08:45,839 No! This is the dawn of a new Ken. 206 00:08:45,840 --> 00:08:47,479 I don't want new Ken. 207 00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:48,759 Casino Ken. 208 00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:50,319 I want old Ken, my Ken. 209 00:08:50,320 --> 00:08:52,999 - Take it back, or I'll chop it up. - Keep it on. 210 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:55,879 - Keep it on and you win. - Take it back, Ken. 211 00:08:55,880 --> 00:08:57,839 - Keep it on! - Take it back! 212 00:08:57,840 --> 00:08:59,782 I feel like a dog being called by two masters. 213 00:08:59,783 --> 00:09:00,559 Two?! 214 00:09:00,560 --> 00:09:02,480 - Yeah, I'm going to take it back. - Oh! 215 00:09:04,480 --> 00:09:06,319 It just tasted really nasty. 216 00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:07,919 Oh, God! 217 00:09:07,920 --> 00:09:10,679 Not like this. This is vermouth. 218 00:09:10,680 --> 00:09:13,239 The unsung hero of many, many a cocktail. 219 00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:15,919 Sorry, you'll have to excuse me, I'm just a little bit nervous. 220 00:09:15,920 --> 00:09:18,479 I haven't been on a date since my last relationship ended. 221 00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:20,679 Well, snap, that makes two of us. 222 00:09:20,680 --> 00:09:24,639 It's good to, you know, get yourself back out there, isn't it? 223 00:09:24,640 --> 00:09:26,119 - Yeah. - Pastures new. 224 00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:29,599 Yeah. I like that. To pastures new. 225 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:30,960 Pastures new. 226 00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:35,000 - (PHONE BUZZES) - Mm. 227 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,560 - I'm so sorry. - It's all right. 228 00:09:39,920 --> 00:09:42,439 Oh, no, I should probably, um... just get this. 229 00:09:42,440 --> 00:09:44,680 - Do you mind if I...? - No, go for it. 230 00:09:47,080 --> 00:09:48,519 Hello. 231 00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:50,703 (TEARFULLY): Babe, where are you? I'm outside yours. 232 00:09:52,063 --> 00:09:54,718 Oh, why? Tash, what's happened? 233 00:09:54,719 --> 00:09:56,839 I'm having a bit of a crisis with Ben. 234 00:09:56,840 --> 00:09:58,439 Can we have a talk? 235 00:09:58,440 --> 00:10:01,479 I wouldn't ask, it's just you're the only one I can talk to about this. 236 00:10:01,480 --> 00:10:03,920 Of course. Um... 237 00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:08,999 Just... Yeah, just wait there, I'll be there in a sec, OK? 238 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:10,240 Thanks. 239 00:10:16,680 --> 00:10:19,119 Oh, gee, I'm so, so sorry. 240 00:10:19,120 --> 00:10:22,119 Um, I have to go. A friend's in trouble. 241 00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:23,421 No, I get it. Go, go. 242 00:10:23,422 --> 00:10:26,601 Um... I'll give you a call, maybe we can reschedule some time. 243 00:10:26,602 --> 00:10:27,960 Oh, sorry. 244 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:31,040 Sorry. 245 00:10:32,400 --> 00:10:35,280 (MUSIC: Grounds For Divorce by Elbow) 246 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:48,759 Ken! You look ravishing. 247 00:10:48,760 --> 00:10:50,640 I feel I want to... 248 00:10:50,641 --> 00:10:52,599 ...stroke you. Can I...? 249 00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:54,239 Keep your hands off me. 250 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:55,559 See, it's working. 251 00:10:55,560 --> 00:10:57,984 I feel terrible, I told Lorna I'd take this back. 252 00:10:57,985 --> 00:10:59,439 You didn't say when. 253 00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:01,119 Come on, give it a test drive. 254 00:11:01,120 --> 00:11:02,719 What if I spill red wine on it? 255 00:11:02,720 --> 00:11:04,119 Vomit, more like it. 256 00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:06,919 This party's shaping up to be quite the rager. 257 00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:08,479 Hmm. 258 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:11,039 Here she is, the belle of the ball. 259 00:11:11,040 --> 00:11:12,479 Happy divorce! 260 00:11:12,480 --> 00:11:14,399 (ALL, SULLENLY): Happy divorce. 261 00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:17,999 They're all here for you, Ivy, to honour your rebirth into society. 262 00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:21,079 Emerging from the chrysalis of marriage 263 00:11:21,080 --> 00:11:23,559 into a glittering middle-aged debutante. 264 00:11:23,560 --> 00:11:25,999 Really, Steve, it's not that big of a deal. 265 00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:27,279 It's a huge deal, Ivy. 266 00:11:27,280 --> 00:11:30,240 Today marks the start of your future and who knows what or... 267 00:11:31,280 --> 00:11:32,960 ...who your future holds? 268 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:35,240 Cake? 269 00:11:36,680 --> 00:11:38,560 It's stale, like your love for Ron. 270 00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:41,759 Some interesting choices for decor. 271 00:11:41,760 --> 00:11:43,359 Oh, you likey? 272 00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:47,479 Your life-sized Ron Mittelfart pinata. 273 00:11:47,480 --> 00:11:50,160 Care to beat the shit out of your ex-husband, Ivy? 274 00:11:51,560 --> 00:11:53,400 With a katana? 275 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,719 - (BLADE RINGS) - Oh... 276 00:11:56,720 --> 00:11:59,160 Thanks, but I don't need to do that. 277 00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:02,679 If someone did to me what he did to you, 278 00:12:02,680 --> 00:12:04,439 I would wrench the soul from his body 279 00:12:04,440 --> 00:12:07,319 and cast it into the eternal pit of damnation, Ivy. 280 00:12:07,320 --> 00:12:09,844 - You say such sweet things. - Mm. 281 00:12:09,845 --> 00:12:12,959 Would you go make me a drink and get someone else to bring it over? 282 00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:14,799 Yeah. 283 00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:15,840 Oh... 284 00:12:17,080 --> 00:12:18,719 Lucy's here. 285 00:12:18,720 --> 00:12:20,280 God, I need to impress her. 286 00:12:21,280 --> 00:12:23,150 Why is she eating sticks? 287 00:12:23,151 --> 00:12:24,439 They're Twiglets. 288 00:12:24,440 --> 00:12:26,079 Well, go get her, champ. 289 00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:28,119 Remember, it's all about the sizzle. 290 00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:29,879 The sizzle, right. 291 00:12:29,880 --> 00:12:31,639 Remind me what the sizzle is again? 292 00:12:31,640 --> 00:12:33,759 Be the man that wears this suit. 293 00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:35,679 Say the things this suit would say. 294 00:12:35,680 --> 00:12:37,399 - (HE EXHALES SHARPLY) - OK. 295 00:12:37,400 --> 00:12:39,173 Steve, have you got any scotch? 296 00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:44,919 Like any successful bachelor, I have an extensive whiskey library. 297 00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:46,360 Oh, God. 298 00:12:48,480 --> 00:12:50,480 Da-da-da-da-da-da... 299 00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:52,840 Ah. 300 00:12:54,040 --> 00:12:55,720 OK. 301 00:12:57,400 --> 00:12:58,720 Wish me luck. 302 00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:02,880 (MUSIC: Papa's Got A Brand New Bag by James Brown) 303 00:13:04,860 --> 00:13:07,279 Lucy, I did not know you were here. 304 00:13:07,280 --> 00:13:09,519 Wow, you scrub up well. 305 00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:12,159 - Have you come from a wedding? - (HE LAUGHS SUAVELY) 306 00:13:12,160 --> 00:13:13,479 No. 307 00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:15,239 Listen, I wanted to say how sorry I was 308 00:13:15,240 --> 00:13:17,919 at the way things panned out at Wetherspoons the other day. 309 00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:19,159 Me, too. 310 00:13:19,160 --> 00:13:22,039 I've never shared a fish and chips at a business meeting before. 311 00:13:22,040 --> 00:13:23,239 No. 312 00:13:23,240 --> 00:13:25,040 It does come with a free pint, so... 313 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:30,919 Anyway, I wanted to take the opportunity to change your mind 314 00:13:30,920 --> 00:13:32,719 about who you might be supporting. 315 00:13:32,720 --> 00:13:35,239 OK. I'm listening. 316 00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:36,985 Here's the thing. 317 00:13:36,986 --> 00:13:38,959 My ex-wife used to call me lots of things. 318 00:13:38,960 --> 00:13:40,439 Poet, bard. 319 00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:42,319 She often used to compliment me on my penis. 320 00:13:42,320 --> 00:13:44,320 Oh, God! 321 00:13:46,840 --> 00:13:48,119 I'm getting a drink. 322 00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:50,839 Hurry up. Party games! Right. 323 00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:55,359 Now, who wants to play pin the husband on the Ivy? 324 00:13:55,360 --> 00:13:56,880 Anyone? 325 00:13:58,200 --> 00:13:59,520 Anyone else? 326 00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:06,039 Oh, thanks for coming. I really got myself in a state. 327 00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:08,199 - So, what happened? - It's just that I couldn't decide 328 00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:10,960 which wax jacket to buy Ben for his birthday. 329 00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,319 Right. 330 00:14:15,320 --> 00:14:19,079 Sorry, Tash, um... Weren't you crying on the phone? 331 00:14:19,080 --> 00:14:22,501 Yeah. Like I said, I just... I was having a tizzy. 332 00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:27,149 Anyway, you want to drink some wine, hang out a bit? 333 00:14:27,920 --> 00:14:29,719 Um... 334 00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:30,960 Oh, sh... 335 00:14:32,231 --> 00:14:34,590 You were on a date. 336 00:14:34,591 --> 00:14:36,272 Was it going well? 337 00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:38,519 It's not bad. 338 00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:39,657 Great. 339 00:14:40,240 --> 00:14:42,679 Do you want to go back or... 340 00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:43,920 ...we can hang? 341 00:14:46,560 --> 00:14:47,923 No, it's OK. 342 00:14:48,320 --> 00:14:50,039 Let's do wine. 343 00:14:50,040 --> 00:14:51,320 Come in. 344 00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:54,239 Mum, Tash is here! 345 00:14:54,240 --> 00:14:55,477 Oh, hiya, Tash. 346 00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:00,439 Hello, is that the tailor's? 347 00:15:00,440 --> 00:15:03,399 Yes, I just want to check that a refund has gone through 348 00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:05,519 because my card's been declined, and... 349 00:15:05,520 --> 00:15:06,879 Yeah. 350 00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:08,266 Ken Thompson. 351 00:15:08,821 --> 00:15:11,079 That's right, very tall, yes. 352 00:15:11,080 --> 00:15:12,840 Did he return his suit? 353 00:15:13,920 --> 00:15:15,360 He didn't? 354 00:15:16,212 --> 00:15:17,412 He bought what?! 355 00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:20,839 Go on, tell me about this boy. 356 00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:23,884 Ooh! Well, er... 357 00:15:24,360 --> 00:15:27,599 I mean, he still remains very fit. Um... 358 00:15:27,600 --> 00:15:29,199 Oh, I don't know. (DOOR SLAMS) 359 00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:31,679 Are you all right, Mum? Where are you going? 360 00:15:31,680 --> 00:15:32,839 To murder your father. 361 00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:35,520 - Or at least, murder his waist coat. - Oh, fair enough. 362 00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:39,959 Oh, they're great, aren't they, your mum and dad. 363 00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:43,459 Like, they're a couple but above all they're best friends. 364 00:15:45,640 --> 00:15:47,999 - Shall we listen to some music? - Yeah. 365 00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:49,919 (MUSIC: Beggin' by Madcon) 366 00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:52,279 - Oh, I love this song. - Mm! 367 00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:54,040 - Tune! - Shall we dance? 368 00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:59,239 Beggin', beggin' you 369 00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:03,199 Put your loving hand out, darling 370 00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:06,599 Riding high when I was king 371 00:16:06,600 --> 00:16:10,439 Played it hard and fast cos I had everything 372 00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:14,279 Beggin', beggin' you 373 00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:17,320 Put your loving hand out, darling... 374 00:16:23,040 --> 00:16:25,479 OK, I'm going to be straight with you, Lucy. 375 00:16:25,480 --> 00:16:27,639 I am inexperienced in the politics game. 376 00:16:27,640 --> 00:16:29,559 There's no getting round that. 377 00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:32,359 But I can guarantee you one thing. 378 00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:33,919 Honesty. 379 00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:36,159 I'm going to be honest with my fellow politicians, 380 00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:38,569 I'm going to be honest with you, the press, 381 00:16:38,570 --> 00:16:40,559 and I'm going to be honest with the people. 382 00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:41,851 Honest Thompson. 383 00:16:41,852 --> 00:16:44,439 Ken, you fucking liar! 384 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:46,799 - Lorna? This is a really bad time. - Don't you Lorna me. 385 00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:48,839 You said you were going to take that suit back, 386 00:16:48,840 --> 00:16:51,439 and instead you buy a flamboyant waistcoat. 387 00:16:51,440 --> 00:16:53,399 You lied to my face, Ken. 388 00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:54,867 "Honest Thompson"? 389 00:16:54,868 --> 00:16:56,799 Yes, all right, I can see the way this is looking... 390 00:16:56,800 --> 00:17:00,399 Lorna, in America, we call this being an asshole. 391 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:01,991 And you can shut up, too. 392 00:17:01,992 --> 00:17:04,279 You're nothing but a bad influence. 393 00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:06,328 Filling his head with pipe dreams and 394 00:17:06,329 --> 00:17:07,839 dressing him up like Puff Daddy. 395 00:17:07,840 --> 00:17:09,279 I'm improving him. 396 00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:10,999 Don't you want him to be ambitious? 397 00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,639 To provide for you? 398 00:17:12,640 --> 00:17:15,430 I get it, Ivy, your husband's gone 399 00:17:15,431 --> 00:17:17,119 and it sounds like he was a shit. 400 00:17:17,120 --> 00:17:20,119 But that's no reason to go taking control of mine. 401 00:17:20,120 --> 00:17:22,999 For God's sake, Lorna, it's just a suit. 402 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:27,559 It's a symbol, Ken, of what she's doing to our family. 403 00:17:27,560 --> 00:17:29,440 And it ends here. 404 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:32,720 He's not taking it back. 405 00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:37,039 No, he's not. 406 00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,279 (BLADE RINGS) 407 00:17:39,280 --> 00:17:40,879 He's taking it off. 408 00:17:40,880 --> 00:17:42,159 What? 409 00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:43,719 Take the suit off, Ken. 410 00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:45,559 Not here in front of people. 411 00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:47,519 I said, take the suit off, Ken. 412 00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:51,000 (MUSIC: Shake Shake Shake Senora by Harry Belafonte) 413 00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:53,639 Trousers down. 414 00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:55,319 - Lorna... - Trousers down! 415 00:17:55,320 --> 00:17:56,520 Trousers. 416 00:17:57,880 --> 00:17:59,120 And the waistcoat. 417 00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:02,680 Now, hold the jacket up. 418 00:18:04,560 --> 00:18:05,680 Lorn! 419 00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:10,080 Aargh! 420 00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:12,880 Aaagh! Lorna! 421 00:18:15,080 --> 00:18:17,479 Lorna, how did that feel? 422 00:18:17,480 --> 00:18:19,199 Oh, really, really good! 423 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:21,039 Hand me the sword. 424 00:18:21,040 --> 00:18:22,679 Oh... 425 00:18:22,680 --> 00:18:25,520 Back, everyone! 426 00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:31,319 Aargh! 427 00:18:31,320 --> 00:18:32,720 Take that, Ron! 428 00:18:37,120 --> 00:18:40,240 Oh, yes, baby! 429 00:18:45,920 --> 00:18:48,799 Oh...! What else can we shred? 430 00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:52,720 - Everything in my shed. - Yeah! Oh, Lorna, let's go. 431 00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:06,879 You know what, Lorna? 432 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:08,964 I've really just been trying to help. 433 00:19:08,965 --> 00:19:10,719 I know. 434 00:19:10,720 --> 00:19:14,279 I guess I had a lot of pent-up anger against Ron after all. 435 00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:17,719 Yeah, I think you proved that when you head-butted the lawn mower. 436 00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:19,760 (THEY LAUGH) 437 00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:22,999 Ahhhh! 438 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:24,458 This was fun. 439 00:19:25,320 --> 00:19:28,411 I've never really had a woman friend in my life before. 440 00:19:29,440 --> 00:19:32,399 I guess there's something to having a family after all, 441 00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:34,356 even if they live in Ditchfield. 442 00:19:35,760 --> 00:19:37,419 It's Lichfield. 443 00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:39,560 Whatever. 444 00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:42,280 (MOCKING): "Whatever!" 445 00:19:44,040 --> 00:19:46,480 "Whatever!" (THEY LAUGH) 446 00:19:48,640 --> 00:19:51,079 (DOOR SLAMS) 447 00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:53,200 (PHONE BUZZES) 448 00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:01,800 Dad? 449 00:20:04,160 --> 00:20:05,280 Hi, you two. 450 00:20:06,221 --> 00:20:08,489 Jesus, what happened? 451 00:20:08,490 --> 00:20:09,880 Oh... 452 00:20:10,824 --> 00:20:12,344 ...I just met a ninja. 453 00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:16,400 - Tell your mum I went to bed. - All right. 454 00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:25,440 - (SHE LAUGHS) - I fell asleep. 455 00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:28,440 Yeah. 456 00:20:30,280 --> 00:20:31,720 I'd better get home. 457 00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:43,080 So, Um... 458 00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:47,440 - Bye. - Goodbye. 459 00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:54,839 I think we need to... 460 00:20:54,840 --> 00:20:56,839 ...remember Ben. 461 00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:58,480 He's a really good friend and... 462 00:20:59,720 --> 00:21:01,473 ...obviously, what you have is very special. 463 00:21:01,474 --> 00:21:02,895 Yeah. Ben. 464 00:21:04,120 --> 00:21:05,840 - Night, Rach. - Night. 465 00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:25,520 Oh, bollocks. 466 00:21:27,970 --> 00:21:33,970 467 00:21:34,020 --> 00:21:38,570 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 32860

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