All language subtitles for Jennifer Falls s01e01 Pilot.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,055 --> 00:00:04,757 [Funk music] 2 00:00:04,759 --> 00:00:05,558 3 00:00:05,560 --> 00:00:08,060 So I had this ten-year plan for myself, 4 00:00:08,062 --> 00:00:10,229 and my life was right on schedule. 5 00:00:10,231 --> 00:00:11,597 I was up for senior V.P. today, 6 00:00:11,599 --> 00:00:13,966 and I had a pretty good feeling about it. 7 00:00:13,968 --> 00:00:14,834 We have to let her go. 8 00:00:14,836 --> 00:00:16,602 Half of her clients won't work with her. 9 00:00:16,604 --> 00:00:17,503 She's going to yell. 10 00:00:17,505 --> 00:00:21,040 I hate it when she yells. Makes me look weak. 11 00:00:21,942 --> 00:00:26,245 - You wanted to see me, Don? - Hey, there she is. 12 00:00:26,247 --> 00:00:27,713 You look fantastic. 13 00:00:27,715 --> 00:00:29,682 Thanks. Having a great day. 14 00:00:29,684 --> 00:00:31,250 - Well, it's early. - What? 15 00:00:31,252 --> 00:00:34,720 Jennifer, I respect you too much to pussyfoot around. 16 00:00:34,722 --> 00:00:37,556 I'm just going to say it straight out. Clay? 17 00:00:37,558 --> 00:00:38,758 We're letting you go. 18 00:00:38,760 --> 00:00:41,794 But... Senior V.P. 19 00:00:41,796 --> 00:00:42,495 You have anger issues. 20 00:00:42,497 --> 00:00:44,897 Frankly, it's something that's followed you your whole career. 21 00:00:44,899 --> 00:00:48,701 I don't have anger issues! Who says I have anger issues? 22 00:00:48,703 --> 00:00:49,302 She's yelling. 23 00:00:49,304 --> 00:00:53,339 Jennifer, you are very good at your job, but... 24 00:00:53,341 --> 00:00:55,441 [Chuckles] You have a personality problem. 25 00:00:55,443 --> 00:00:59,445 You're aggressive, you're cocky, you take no prisoners. 26 00:00:59,447 --> 00:01:01,480 Qualities that get men promotions. 27 00:01:01,482 --> 00:01:03,749 And then you say hurtful things like that. 28 00:01:03,751 --> 00:01:04,283 Unbelievable. 29 00:01:04,285 --> 00:01:07,253 Hey, you know, take the rest of the day off. 30 00:01:07,255 --> 00:01:08,521 Go to the zoo. 31 00:01:08,523 --> 00:01:10,623 They have these baby pandas. 32 00:01:10,625 --> 00:01:12,325 They'll just melt your heart. 33 00:01:12,327 --> 00:01:14,549 Um, the mother ate her babies. 34 00:01:16,001 --> 00:01:18,764 What? When? 35 00:01:18,766 --> 00:01:20,299 [Door opens] 36 00:01:20,301 --> 00:01:21,734 Oh, come on in. 37 00:01:21,736 --> 00:01:24,403 Jennifer, you know Connie from H.R. 38 00:01:24,405 --> 00:01:26,205 and Larry from Security. 39 00:01:26,207 --> 00:01:29,175 They're here to make sure you don't shoot the place up. 40 00:01:29,177 --> 00:01:30,910 [Both laughing] Right, guys? 41 00:01:30,912 --> 00:01:33,212 But seriously, you should go now. 42 00:01:33,214 --> 00:01:35,081 Yeah. 43 00:01:35,083 --> 00:01:36,949 Don, you handled that beautifully. 44 00:01:36,951 --> 00:01:39,051 I felt good. I felt strong. 45 00:01:39,053 --> 00:01:43,322 You know what, if you're gonna fire me for my anger issues, 46 00:01:43,324 --> 00:01:45,024 I might as well get my money's worth, Don. 47 00:01:45,026 --> 00:01:48,461 Nobody gives a rat's ass what you shot at Pebble Beach. 48 00:01:48,463 --> 00:01:50,529 All the assistants are creeped out 49 00:01:50,531 --> 00:01:51,464 by your rapey backrubs. 50 00:01:51,466 --> 00:01:54,533 You are weak, lazy, hog all the credit, 51 00:01:54,535 --> 00:01:59,205 take none of the blame, and your breath smells like ass. 52 00:02:08,415 --> 00:02:10,282 We carpooled. 53 00:02:10,284 --> 00:02:12,685 Oh, that's right. It's Tuesday. 54 00:02:12,687 --> 00:02:13,352 I can take a cab. 55 00:02:13,354 --> 00:02:16,756 No, no, no. I mean, you're on the way. 56 00:02:16,758 --> 00:02:20,226 Great. 57 00:02:21,828 --> 00:02:22,361 [Exhales] 58 00:02:22,363 --> 00:02:26,098 So it's been six months, and I've gotten really close 59 00:02:26,100 --> 00:02:27,967 on a lot of jobs, but apparently, 60 00:02:27,969 --> 00:02:29,435 blackballing is a real thing. 61 00:02:29,437 --> 00:02:32,938 The good news is, I'm getting a lot of helpful feedback. 62 00:02:32,940 --> 00:02:35,908 Evidently, the men in the industry find me terrifying, 63 00:02:35,910 --> 00:02:38,944 but all the women find me inspiring 64 00:02:38,946 --> 00:02:40,813 and also terrifying. 65 00:02:40,815 --> 00:02:42,314 But hey, I'm going to be fine. 66 00:02:42,316 --> 00:02:46,986 I mean, I'm still confident, still strong, still... 67 00:02:46,988 --> 00:02:50,389 Excuse me. 68 00:02:50,391 --> 00:02:52,258 Unbeatable. 69 00:02:52,260 --> 00:02:55,394 [Upbeat music] 70 00:02:55,396 --> 00:02:56,028 71 00:02:56,030 --> 00:02:57,563 Mom, you're not listening. 72 00:02:57,565 --> 00:03:00,066 I don't want to live at grandma's. 73 00:03:00,068 --> 00:03:02,234 How are we broke? You made so much money. 74 00:03:02,236 --> 00:03:04,470 Yeah, but we spent so much more. 75 00:03:04,472 --> 00:03:07,306 Mom, please don't make a fuss. 76 00:03:07,308 --> 00:03:08,407 So we have nothing? 77 00:03:08,409 --> 00:03:10,543 Oh, no, we still have mountains of debt. 78 00:03:10,545 --> 00:03:11,844 Mom, you're not listening! 79 00:03:11,846 --> 00:03:14,680 Are you going to be drunk the whole time we're there? 80 00:03:14,682 --> 00:03:16,449 It's looking that way, sweetie. 81 00:03:16,451 --> 00:03:19,819 Mom, please promise me you're not going to throw a party. 82 00:03:19,821 --> 00:03:21,454 She's back! 83 00:03:21,456 --> 00:03:22,555 - Hey. - All: Hi! 84 00:03:22,557 --> 00:03:26,459 [Laughs] It's a party. 85 00:03:26,461 --> 00:03:27,893 [Whispers] What are you doing? 86 00:03:27,895 --> 00:03:29,128 Well, I know you said no party, 87 00:03:29,130 --> 00:03:33,265 but it's just family and friends, very low-key. 88 00:03:33,267 --> 00:03:34,800 [La Cucaracha playing] 89 00:03:34,802 --> 00:03:35,468 A mariachi band? 90 00:03:35,470 --> 00:03:39,138 This close to Cinco de Mayo, it was such a coup to get them. 91 00:03:39,140 --> 00:03:41,907 Look, mom, I really appreciate you taking us in, I do, 92 00:03:41,909 --> 00:03:45,277 but this isn't really a party day for me. 93 00:03:45,279 --> 00:03:49,215 I mean, I can't get a job, I am upside down in my house, 94 00:03:49,217 --> 00:03:50,182 I burned through all my savings, 95 00:03:50,184 --> 00:03:52,118 and now I've got la Cucaracha in my head! 96 00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:54,787 Sounds like somebody needs a margarita. 97 00:03:54,789 --> 00:03:56,922 No, mom, that is so not what I'm saying. 98 00:03:56,924 --> 00:04:02,661 I j... No salt! Please. 99 00:04:02,663 --> 00:04:04,029 Salt. 100 00:04:04,764 --> 00:04:07,399 - Hey, Wayne. - Hey, sis. 101 00:04:07,401 --> 00:04:09,702 Quit screwing around, dude. 102 00:04:09,704 --> 00:04:10,536 Jennifer! 103 00:04:10,538 --> 00:04:12,304 [Gasps] How's your anger? 104 00:04:12,306 --> 00:04:15,374 Great, Steph. How's your passive aggression? 105 00:04:15,376 --> 00:04:17,676 [Laughs] You're so funny. 106 00:04:17,678 --> 00:04:21,981 Wayne and I were both so sick about what happened to you. 107 00:04:21,983 --> 00:04:24,083 - You lost everything? - I did. 108 00:04:24,085 --> 00:04:25,684 Ugh, that beautiful house 109 00:04:25,686 --> 00:04:28,053 in Santa Monica that blocked everybody's view. 110 00:04:28,055 --> 00:04:28,654 Lost the house. 111 00:04:28,656 --> 00:04:31,657 Gorgeous condo in Maui that we only saw in pictures. 112 00:04:31,659 --> 00:04:33,526 Mm, condo's gone. 113 00:04:33,528 --> 00:04:34,527 Oh, and that hockney print 114 00:04:34,529 --> 00:04:36,562 that you didn't even light properly. 115 00:04:36,564 --> 00:04:38,697 - [Grunts] - That's three, Wayne. 116 00:04:38,699 --> 00:04:41,700 - What, but I didn't even... - Next! 117 00:04:41,702 --> 00:04:43,903 This isn't over, Conner. 118 00:04:43,905 --> 00:04:46,939 Babe, will you please get me a drink? 119 00:04:46,941 --> 00:04:47,606 Okay. 120 00:04:47,608 --> 00:04:50,709 Just don't talk about the eviction till I get back. 121 00:04:50,711 --> 00:04:53,012 [Laughs] 122 00:04:53,064 --> 00:04:54,029 Give me that. 123 00:04:54,031 --> 00:04:57,933 Cannot believe I'm back home living with mom. 124 00:04:58,802 --> 00:05:01,637 Soon as I make some money, I'm out of here. 125 00:05:01,639 --> 00:05:04,140 You can always come to work for me at the bar. 126 00:05:04,142 --> 00:05:06,509 You make your own hours. We have health care. 127 00:05:06,511 --> 00:05:07,443 Wait, you have health care? 128 00:05:07,445 --> 00:05:10,880 [Laughs] No, come on, we don't even have a first aid kit. 129 00:05:10,882 --> 00:05:14,950 Okay, why the hell not? Thanks, bro. 130 00:05:14,952 --> 00:05:18,287 Wow, I'm gonna be your boss. 131 00:05:18,289 --> 00:05:20,956 Oh, my God, I feel like such a loser. 132 00:05:20,958 --> 00:05:22,625 Oh, come on, you're not a loser. 133 00:05:22,627 --> 00:05:25,694 Just 'cause you're back living with mom and you got fired 134 00:05:25,696 --> 00:05:28,664 and you're blackballed and humiliated, 135 00:05:28,666 --> 00:05:30,332 you have no money. 136 00:05:30,334 --> 00:05:31,100 You used to be rich. 137 00:05:31,102 --> 00:05:34,970 There are plenty of people out there who will never make what you lost. 138 00:05:34,972 --> 00:05:36,472 [Grunts] 139 00:05:36,474 --> 00:05:39,808 [Grunting] 140 00:05:48,418 --> 00:05:51,153 Hey, kids. 141 00:05:51,155 --> 00:05:55,124 Want, um... you want some candy? 142 00:05:55,126 --> 00:05:57,693 There's a lot of candy here. 143 00:06:01,689 --> 00:06:04,157 - Morning, mom. - Good morning. 144 00:06:04,159 --> 00:06:05,992 It's so good to have you back, honey. 145 00:06:05,994 --> 00:06:10,597 Thanks, but you know I'm not back back. 146 00:06:10,599 --> 00:06:11,498 It's just for a few weeks. 147 00:06:11,500 --> 00:06:14,367 A few weeks, forever. We don't have to define it. 148 00:06:14,369 --> 00:06:18,338 [Chuckles] Mmm. Bacon waffles? 149 00:06:18,340 --> 00:06:20,040 Mm-hmm. 150 00:06:20,042 --> 00:06:22,476 Okay, forever. [Laughter] 151 00:06:22,478 --> 00:06:23,977 Is there anybody in the neighborhood 152 00:06:23,979 --> 00:06:25,378 left from the old days? 153 00:06:25,380 --> 00:06:26,413 Let's see. 154 00:06:26,415 --> 00:06:29,382 Mike Dorfman is living in his mom's garage, 155 00:06:29,384 --> 00:06:30,517 has it fixed up real cute. 156 00:06:30,519 --> 00:06:33,253 He runs his own computer repair business, 157 00:06:33,255 --> 00:06:34,421 and he's still single. 158 00:06:34,423 --> 00:06:36,490 It's like a fairy tale. 159 00:06:36,492 --> 00:06:38,758 Oh, and I ran into your old friend Dina Simac 160 00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:41,261 at the grocery store last week. 161 00:06:41,263 --> 00:06:41,928 - Dina? - Yeah. 162 00:06:41,930 --> 00:06:44,397 - I asked her over for dinner. - Oh, my God! 163 00:06:44,399 --> 00:06:46,500 I have missed her so much. I love Dina. 164 00:06:46,552 --> 00:06:49,286 You know, we haven't seen each other in a really long time. 165 00:06:49,288 --> 00:06:51,821 She is exactly what I need right now. 166 00:06:51,823 --> 00:06:54,724 She doesn't want to see you. 167 00:06:54,726 --> 00:06:56,426 What? Why? 168 00:06:56,428 --> 00:07:01,198 I didn't ask. It's not my place. 169 00:07:01,200 --> 00:07:01,798 Wow. 170 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:04,801 Did you eat cheese last night? 171 00:07:08,272 --> 00:07:11,908 [Billiard balls clinking] 172 00:07:20,985 --> 00:07:24,354 Okay, put my self-respect in the locker. 173 00:07:24,356 --> 00:07:27,691 Where do I start? 174 00:07:27,693 --> 00:07:29,859 What? 175 00:07:29,861 --> 00:07:30,860 Life is funny. 176 00:07:30,862 --> 00:07:34,698 You used to babysit me, and now I'm your boss. 177 00:07:34,700 --> 00:07:36,099 The paths we take. 178 00:07:36,101 --> 00:07:36,900 Yeah. 179 00:07:36,902 --> 00:07:38,935 Let me show you how to pour a draft. 180 00:07:38,937 --> 00:07:40,370 Now, the trick is... [Laughs] 181 00:07:40,372 --> 00:07:43,173 I was a V.P. for a Fortune 500 company. 182 00:07:43,175 --> 00:07:46,943 - I can pour a beer. - Okay. 183 00:07:53,584 --> 00:07:57,254 Okay, here is your glass of... 184 00:07:57,256 --> 00:07:58,655 Foam. 185 00:07:58,657 --> 00:07:59,422 Wow. 186 00:07:59,424 --> 00:08:02,993 Sorry about that. That one is on me. 187 00:08:02,995 --> 00:08:04,294 That's okay. 188 00:08:04,296 --> 00:08:07,697 Okay. [Chuckles] 189 00:08:07,699 --> 00:08:08,798 Hello, girls. 190 00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:12,068 Hey! Just because I'm wearing this little sports-whore outfit 191 00:08:12,070 --> 00:08:14,871 does not mean I'm gonna put up with crap from jerks like you, 192 00:08:14,873 --> 00:08:16,473 - you got it? - Got it. 193 00:08:16,475 --> 00:08:20,477 And these are my girls, Abbie and Lily. 194 00:08:20,479 --> 00:08:21,911 It's our weekend together. We're having dinner. 195 00:08:21,913 --> 00:08:24,147 Hey, it's so nice... so nice to meet you. 196 00:08:24,149 --> 00:08:29,085 I'll be right there, guys. 197 00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:32,889 I'm sorry. Your girls are adorable. 198 00:08:32,891 --> 00:08:37,727 Thank you. So are yours. 199 00:08:39,597 --> 00:08:42,032 Okay, here's the deal... think of a sports bar 200 00:08:42,034 --> 00:08:44,100 like it was dad's den when we were kids. 201 00:08:44,102 --> 00:08:46,236 Never stand in front of a TV when a game is on, 202 00:08:46,238 --> 00:08:49,205 and never tell anyone they've had too much to drink. 203 00:08:49,207 --> 00:08:51,107 And Dennis Miller ruined football. 204 00:08:51,109 --> 00:08:52,909 - You're a natural. - Thanks. 205 00:08:52,911 --> 00:08:55,478 Listen, do you think that maybe I could get 206 00:08:55,480 --> 00:08:56,713 a little advance on my paycheck? 207 00:08:56,715 --> 00:08:58,982 Gretchen's been really bummed out lately, 208 00:08:58,984 --> 00:09:01,017 and I told her I'd take her shopping. 209 00:09:01,019 --> 00:09:02,352 Just, like, 100 bucks. 210 00:09:02,354 --> 00:09:03,853 I'll ask Stephanie if I can. 211 00:09:03,855 --> 00:09:07,324 - Ask me what? - Jen wants an advance. 212 00:09:07,326 --> 00:09:10,393 Oh, there's no shame in that, Jennifer. 213 00:09:10,395 --> 00:09:12,195 Didn't say there was, Stephanie. 214 00:09:12,197 --> 00:09:12,729 Good for you. 215 00:09:12,731 --> 00:09:15,265 Wayne and I are happy to give you an advance. 216 00:09:15,267 --> 00:09:15,699 Great. 217 00:09:15,701 --> 00:09:17,033 This could be a teachable moment. 218 00:09:17,035 --> 00:09:18,134 - Ooh. - A what? 219 00:09:18,136 --> 00:09:21,004 This is a great opportunity to discuss money management. 220 00:09:21,006 --> 00:09:23,006 Now, I don't know about you, but the way that Wayne and I 221 00:09:23,008 --> 00:09:26,776 manage our money is that we don't spend money 222 00:09:26,778 --> 00:09:28,345 that we don't have. 223 00:09:28,347 --> 00:09:29,746 - Uh-huh. - Does that make sense? 224 00:09:29,748 --> 00:09:33,083 - Yeah. Excuse us. Wayne? - Yeah. 225 00:09:33,085 --> 00:09:36,486 - Can I just... - Yeah. 226 00:09:37,321 --> 00:09:40,523 Okay, so you have way more experience with her. 227 00:09:40,525 --> 00:09:42,892 When your wife talks like that, how do you keep 228 00:09:42,894 --> 00:09:45,628 from stabbing her in the eye with an ice pick? 229 00:09:45,630 --> 00:09:48,698 - I think about her naked. - Mm-hmm. 230 00:09:48,700 --> 00:09:50,233 Yeah, I don't think that's going to work for me. 231 00:09:50,235 --> 00:09:52,836 Yeah, I'm not sure I'd be comfortable with that. 232 00:09:52,838 --> 00:09:55,238 Okay. All right, great, thanks. 233 00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:58,875 My door is always open. 234 00:09:58,877 --> 00:10:02,212 You know what, that makes a lot of sense, Stephanie. 235 00:10:02,214 --> 00:10:04,447 Great, this is gonna be fun. 236 00:10:04,449 --> 00:10:06,282 Super fun. 237 00:10:06,284 --> 00:10:09,652 [Mouthing] 238 00:10:15,659 --> 00:10:17,494 Dina? 239 00:10:17,496 --> 00:10:19,095 - Oh, my God! - What? 240 00:10:19,097 --> 00:10:20,630 I didn't know you were working here. 241 00:10:20,632 --> 00:10:22,065 - Hey! - Oh! 242 00:10:22,067 --> 00:10:24,200 [Laughs] Hi. 243 00:10:24,202 --> 00:10:26,903 I have missed you so much. How are you doing? 244 00:10:26,905 --> 00:10:30,106 Oh, I'm good. I'm still working for U.P.S. 245 00:10:30,108 --> 00:10:32,342 And pitching for my women's softball team, 246 00:10:32,344 --> 00:10:33,676 - the L.A. lesbians. - Right. 247 00:10:33,678 --> 00:10:35,745 Ladies like to put it out there. 248 00:10:35,747 --> 00:10:37,280 Well, how are you and Jeremy doing? 249 00:10:37,282 --> 00:10:39,749 Happily, head-over-heels divorced. 250 00:10:39,751 --> 00:10:41,785 [Gasps] Oh, thank God. [Laughs] 251 00:10:41,787 --> 00:10:43,686 I have been biting my tongue for 15 years. 252 00:10:43,688 --> 00:10:45,355 I never liked that selfish moron. 253 00:10:45,357 --> 00:10:49,125 He's still the father of my child, Jennifer. 254 00:10:49,127 --> 00:10:49,759 Yeah. 255 00:10:49,761 --> 00:10:51,995 I'm screwing with you! He's a scumbag! 256 00:10:51,997 --> 00:10:54,731 [Laughter] Oh, God. 257 00:10:54,733 --> 00:10:55,965 See, this is what I miss. 258 00:10:55,967 --> 00:10:57,133 - You know? - Yeah! 259 00:10:57,135 --> 00:10:58,668 Remember when we used to sit in my backyard 260 00:10:58,670 --> 00:10:59,769 - and smoking cigarettes... - Yeah. 261 00:10:59,771 --> 00:11:02,439 And talking about our lives, and I was going to be 262 00:11:02,441 --> 00:11:06,376 the first American woman in space till Sally Ride... 263 00:11:06,378 --> 00:11:08,178 You got to let that go, honey. 264 00:11:08,180 --> 00:11:09,078 - Yeah. - Yeah. 265 00:11:09,080 --> 00:11:11,381 You know, my mom said something really weird. 266 00:11:11,383 --> 00:11:15,318 She said that you didn't want to come over for dinner. 267 00:11:15,320 --> 00:11:19,656 - What? That's crazy. - Yeah. 268 00:11:19,658 --> 00:11:22,859 I mean, I totally get it, 'cause my mom drives me crazy too. 269 00:11:22,861 --> 00:11:23,693 - Yeah. - She also made it 270 00:11:23,695 --> 00:11:25,228 seem like you didn't want to see me. 271 00:11:25,230 --> 00:11:27,697 - Oh, pfft. - You know, yeah. 272 00:11:27,699 --> 00:11:28,665 Oh, sh... I gotta... [Inhales] 273 00:11:28,667 --> 00:11:32,202 I'm just... I'm late for this thing that I gotta get to, 274 00:11:32,204 --> 00:11:33,770 so, um... oh. 275 00:11:33,772 --> 00:11:35,872 Okay, Dina, this is really weird. 276 00:11:35,874 --> 00:11:37,640 - What? - Yeah, it's weird. 277 00:11:37,642 --> 00:11:38,775 No, it's not weird. 278 00:11:38,777 --> 00:11:40,844 It is. Are we okay? 279 00:11:40,846 --> 00:11:42,712 Are we okay? 280 00:11:42,714 --> 00:11:44,113 No, we're not okay, okay? 281 00:11:44,115 --> 00:11:45,548 We're really not, and we haven't been for years. 282 00:11:45,550 --> 00:11:48,084 And if you don't know why, that's part of the problem. 283 00:11:48,086 --> 00:11:49,919 But your hair looks really cute like that, okay? 284 00:11:49,921 --> 00:11:53,122 - Have a nice life. - Dina. 285 00:11:53,124 --> 00:11:55,425 Dina. 286 00:12:01,580 --> 00:12:03,481 Hi, is my mom in? 287 00:12:03,483 --> 00:12:05,750 No, sorry. 288 00:12:05,752 --> 00:12:09,253 Hi, sweetie, come on in. 289 00:12:14,126 --> 00:12:16,293 Mom, are you hiring your patients again? 290 00:12:16,295 --> 00:12:19,363 - Isn't Lorna great? - She just lied to my face. 291 00:12:19,365 --> 00:12:20,798 It's a coping mechanism. 292 00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:23,467 She only does it when she's feeling threatened. 293 00:12:23,469 --> 00:12:25,703 Her family was a mess, poor thing. 294 00:12:25,705 --> 00:12:27,538 Bipolar father, domineering mother. 295 00:12:27,540 --> 00:12:30,941 Now she acts out sexually with men she barely knows. 296 00:12:30,943 --> 00:12:33,544 I can't really talk about it. 297 00:12:33,546 --> 00:12:36,580 Okay, listen, can you take Gretchen shopping 298 00:12:36,582 --> 00:12:37,548 for me after school today? 299 00:12:37,550 --> 00:12:40,217 I promised her I would, but I have this interview. 300 00:12:40,219 --> 00:12:42,720 Well, sure, honey. 301 00:12:44,156 --> 00:12:46,090 - Are you okay? - Yeah, I'm fine. Why? 302 00:12:46,092 --> 00:12:48,959 You made this out to "what's the point"? 303 00:12:48,961 --> 00:12:51,762 Oh. Sorry. 304 00:12:54,966 --> 00:12:57,835 Please don't ask me if I'm okay again. 305 00:12:57,837 --> 00:13:00,104 - Are you okay? - No, I'm not okay! 306 00:13:00,106 --> 00:13:00,638 Do I look okay? 307 00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:03,841 You need to be in therapy. You have anger issues. 308 00:13:03,843 --> 00:13:05,776 Why does everybody keep saying that? 309 00:13:05,778 --> 00:13:08,212 I know you can't afford therapy right now, 310 00:13:08,214 --> 00:13:10,314 but I have a solution. 311 00:13:10,316 --> 00:13:13,150 I'm willing to see you for free. 312 00:13:13,452 --> 00:13:14,551 Or maybe a little yard work. 313 00:13:14,553 --> 00:13:17,354 - Are you nuts? - Well, just some light weeding. 314 00:13:17,356 --> 00:13:20,257 Mom, I am not going to have my own mother as my shrink. 315 00:13:20,259 --> 00:13:21,825 I think Freud would back me up on this. 316 00:13:21,827 --> 00:13:25,362 Freud. Who understands you better than your own mother? 317 00:13:25,364 --> 00:13:27,698 Mom, you're not listening to me. I said no. 318 00:13:27,700 --> 00:13:30,033 Give me one good reason why not. 319 00:13:30,035 --> 00:13:32,703 Because you don't listen to me! 320 00:13:32,705 --> 00:13:36,907 See, you can't. 321 00:13:37,776 --> 00:13:40,744 $250,000? 322 00:13:40,746 --> 00:13:43,413 I can work for less. 323 00:13:43,415 --> 00:13:43,914 Way less. 324 00:13:43,916 --> 00:13:49,019 Doreen, she made $250,000 at her last job. 325 00:13:49,021 --> 00:13:50,254 Damn, I wouldn't lose that job. 326 00:13:50,256 --> 00:13:53,090 - You can't lose that job. - That's the job you keep. 327 00:13:53,092 --> 00:13:57,227 I'm afraid we're fresh out of our $250,000 jobs. 328 00:13:57,229 --> 00:14:00,197 Did you check in the $250,000 job drawer? 329 00:14:00,199 --> 00:14:02,733 [Both laughing] 330 00:14:02,735 --> 00:14:05,204 You know what? It's not funny. 331 00:14:06,806 --> 00:14:07,704 I lost everything. 332 00:14:07,706 --> 00:14:09,640 I mean, I had to move back in with my mother, 333 00:14:09,642 --> 00:14:11,341 and I'm working for my brother at his bar 334 00:14:11,343 --> 00:14:13,877 with his crazy-ass wife, my best friend hates me, 335 00:14:13,879 --> 00:14:16,046 and my daughter is planning her own funeral. 336 00:14:16,048 --> 00:14:19,116 Wow. That sounds pretty rough. 337 00:14:19,118 --> 00:14:22,219 Yeah, well, it is. 338 00:14:22,221 --> 00:14:24,421 I'm so sorry. 339 00:14:24,423 --> 00:14:25,155 Hey, Doreen, join us. 340 00:14:25,157 --> 00:14:27,057 Jennifer's throwing a pity party. 341 00:14:27,059 --> 00:14:28,992 - Oh, I'll bring the kleenex. - [Both laughing] 342 00:14:29,044 --> 00:14:31,879 - That's not fair. - Nothing's fair. 343 00:14:31,881 --> 00:14:34,948 I'm supposed to feel sorry for you because you have to work 344 00:14:34,950 --> 00:14:36,917 for your brother? You're working. 345 00:14:36,919 --> 00:14:39,086 You had to move back in with your mother? 346 00:14:39,088 --> 00:14:41,521 She took you in. 347 00:14:41,523 --> 00:14:44,091 You know what, you are twisting everything around 348 00:14:44,093 --> 00:14:47,828 and making it all sound... good. 349 00:14:47,830 --> 00:14:51,231 Hey, I found the $250,000 jobs. 350 00:14:51,233 --> 00:14:53,033 I was sitting on 'em. 351 00:14:53,035 --> 00:14:55,202 [Both laughing] 352 00:14:55,204 --> 00:14:57,170 Sorry I'm late, guys, but I had this little shred 353 00:14:57,172 --> 00:15:00,040 of dignity still stuck to me that I had to get rid of. 354 00:15:00,042 --> 00:15:00,674 Gretchen called. 355 00:15:00,676 --> 00:15:03,010 She's mad at you for having mom take her shopping. 356 00:15:03,012 --> 00:15:05,145 - Of course she is. - Do you want my advice? 357 00:15:05,147 --> 00:15:06,914 - Your advice? - Just say you do. 358 00:15:06,916 --> 00:15:08,715 I know it's none of my business, but... 359 00:15:08,717 --> 00:15:09,349 Are you kidding? 360 00:15:09,351 --> 00:15:11,852 You know nothing about it, and I didn't ask you. 361 00:15:11,854 --> 00:15:13,253 Of course it's your business. 362 00:15:13,255 --> 00:15:16,256 [Chuckles] Okay, loving the playful banter, guys, 363 00:15:16,258 --> 00:15:19,459 but these beers won't serve themselves, right? 364 00:15:19,461 --> 00:15:21,461 Table seven. 365 00:15:23,064 --> 00:15:24,564 [Indistinct chatter] 366 00:15:24,566 --> 00:15:26,800 Seriously, Dina's table? 367 00:15:26,802 --> 00:15:31,905 I'm sorry, but you have to get over your fear of lesbians. 368 00:15:31,907 --> 00:15:35,042 It's the law now. 369 00:15:41,582 --> 00:15:44,051 Here you go, ladies. I'm Jennifer. 370 00:15:44,053 --> 00:15:46,219 Just let me know if you need anything else, 371 00:15:46,221 --> 00:15:49,523 like the chance to tell me why you're so mad at me. 372 00:15:49,525 --> 00:15:54,294 Well, I asked for mozzarella sticks about 20 minutes ago. 373 00:15:54,296 --> 00:15:58,231 Okay. Anybody else? 374 00:15:58,233 --> 00:15:59,032 Dina maybe? 375 00:15:59,034 --> 00:16:02,336 Really? You really don't know? 376 00:16:02,338 --> 00:16:04,938 Just tell me. What? 377 00:16:04,940 --> 00:16:08,442 - [Scoffs] - What... 378 00:16:08,444 --> 00:16:12,346 Dina! [Sighs] 379 00:16:13,982 --> 00:16:15,615 Open this door! 380 00:16:15,617 --> 00:16:17,651 Ah! Jesus! 381 00:16:17,653 --> 00:16:20,554 - Tell me what I did! - You changed. 382 00:16:20,556 --> 00:16:23,190 I didn't change. How did I change? 383 00:16:23,192 --> 00:16:24,358 Oh! Oh! 384 00:16:24,360 --> 00:16:26,827 Okay, that is... Ow! Ow! 385 00:16:26,829 --> 00:16:29,997 You know what? I am not giving up that easy. 386 00:16:29,999 --> 00:16:33,834 Whoa. What? Hey! What? 387 00:16:34,669 --> 00:16:38,438 [Sighs] Okay, now, will you just talk to me? 388 00:16:38,440 --> 00:16:41,341 I don't even know where to start. 389 00:16:41,343 --> 00:16:43,810 You remember when I was going through all that horrible stuff 390 00:16:43,812 --> 00:16:45,512 with Jeremy and I was flipping out? 391 00:16:45,544 --> 00:16:48,979 Yeah, I sent you a $200 gift certificate 392 00:16:48,981 --> 00:16:49,646 to my massage therapist. 393 00:16:49,648 --> 00:16:51,381 Well, I didn't want a massage therapist. 394 00:16:51,383 --> 00:16:56,586 I wanted my best friend to be with me and talk about it. 395 00:16:56,588 --> 00:16:57,387 You didn't use it? 396 00:16:57,389 --> 00:17:00,857 No, I used it, but still, it pissed me off. 397 00:17:00,859 --> 00:17:02,993 Did he do the "hands on fire" thing? 398 00:17:02,995 --> 00:17:04,061 Oh, my God, yes, that was amazing. 399 00:17:04,063 --> 00:17:05,896 I know, you just melt. It's my favorite. 400 00:17:05,898 --> 00:17:07,731 It's like... no, but that's not the point. 401 00:17:07,733 --> 00:17:09,566 You used to be such a good friend to me, 402 00:17:09,568 --> 00:17:11,334 and then you turned into some stranger 403 00:17:11,336 --> 00:17:16,006 who just throws money at people. 404 00:17:16,008 --> 00:17:18,875 Oh, my God. 405 00:17:18,877 --> 00:17:19,943 I did, huh? 406 00:17:19,945 --> 00:17:23,146 - What happened to you? - I don't know, I just... 407 00:17:23,148 --> 00:17:28,251 I was making all this money and having all this success. 408 00:17:28,253 --> 00:17:30,253 And, I mean, I really was the Sally Ride 409 00:17:30,255 --> 00:17:31,621 - of investment banking... - Oh, my God! 410 00:17:31,623 --> 00:17:36,493 - Okay, I'm just saying. God. - [Scoffs] 411 00:17:36,495 --> 00:17:39,029 [Sighs] 412 00:17:39,031 --> 00:17:41,731 I mean, I had a lot of what I wanted, 413 00:17:41,733 --> 00:17:44,601 but the truth is, I just... 414 00:17:44,603 --> 00:17:48,472 I was still really, really lonely. 415 00:17:48,474 --> 00:17:52,409 Can't we just go back to the way things were? 416 00:17:52,411 --> 00:17:53,777 I mean, I know you still like me. 417 00:17:53,779 --> 00:17:55,512 You can't help it. I'm awesome. 418 00:17:55,514 --> 00:17:56,746 - We both know that. - [Scoffs] 419 00:17:56,748 --> 00:17:59,783 - Hello. - Oh, my God. 420 00:17:59,785 --> 00:18:01,785 Hello. [Laughs] 421 00:18:01,787 --> 00:18:04,254 This is probably my fault because we didn't go over it, 422 00:18:04,256 --> 00:18:06,690 but bar policy is that we don't usually take breaks 423 00:18:06,692 --> 00:18:09,893 - so soon after coming in late. - Oh. 424 00:18:09,895 --> 00:18:14,097 Or in the parking lot or in a friend's car. 425 00:18:14,099 --> 00:18:17,434 - You'll get this. - Okay. 426 00:18:17,436 --> 00:18:19,503 Two words. Hit and run. 427 00:18:19,505 --> 00:18:21,771 There's a dumpster right there. 428 00:18:21,773 --> 00:18:23,507 - Nobody would know. - Nope. 429 00:18:23,509 --> 00:18:25,775 - Hmm. - All right, get out. 430 00:18:25,777 --> 00:18:27,944 See, we can build on this, right? 431 00:18:27,946 --> 00:18:32,582 You can't live without me. Don't kid yourself. 432 00:18:32,584 --> 00:18:35,218 Hey, I'm gonna win you over. 433 00:18:35,220 --> 00:18:39,156 Now you sound like my second baseman. 434 00:18:46,221 --> 00:18:47,121 Hey. 435 00:18:47,123 --> 00:18:49,023 Hey. You okay? 436 00:18:49,025 --> 00:18:52,226 Yeah. Yeah, I am. 437 00:18:52,228 --> 00:18:52,927 What can I get you? 438 00:18:52,929 --> 00:18:55,496 - Can I see a foam list? - [Laughs] 439 00:18:55,498 --> 00:18:59,066 You know what, I've got it down pat now. 440 00:18:59,068 --> 00:19:00,768 Watch. 441 00:19:00,770 --> 00:19:02,637 Hey, very nice. 442 00:19:02,639 --> 00:19:04,739 Thank you. 443 00:19:04,741 --> 00:19:08,409 I've always wanted to do this. 444 00:19:08,844 --> 00:19:10,711 - [Glass smashing] - Oh! That didn't work. 445 00:19:10,713 --> 00:19:14,248 You know what, I'm just gonna... I'm gonna hand you this one. 446 00:19:14,250 --> 00:19:14,982 No, come on. 447 00:19:14,984 --> 00:19:18,052 - Really? - Yeah, let her rip. 448 00:19:21,523 --> 00:19:22,957 Yay! 449 00:19:22,959 --> 00:19:26,527 So I've gone from maximum profits to minimum wage. 450 00:19:26,529 --> 00:19:29,764 I work ten hours a day, then go home, cook, clean, 451 00:19:29,766 --> 00:19:33,601 take care of my kid, which is crazy and exhausting, 452 00:19:33,603 --> 00:19:34,135 and apparently, 453 00:19:34,137 --> 00:19:37,638 is something that 33.7 million single working mothers do 454 00:19:37,640 --> 00:19:39,440 in this country every day. 455 00:19:39,442 --> 00:19:42,543 So if I whine about missing my housekeeper, 456 00:19:42,545 --> 00:19:47,348 I am a giant douche bag. 457 00:19:47,350 --> 00:19:49,617 I miss Lupe. 458 00:19:49,619 --> 00:19:51,552 [Laughter on television] 459 00:19:51,554 --> 00:19:55,756 - Thanks for the omelet, mom. - Oh, no problem. 460 00:19:55,758 --> 00:19:57,225 [Chuckles] 461 00:19:57,227 --> 00:19:59,260 Was it as good as the ones Lupe... 462 00:19:59,262 --> 00:20:01,929 Mom, don't. 463 00:20:01,931 --> 00:20:05,066 It was really fun going shopping with grandma. 464 00:20:05,068 --> 00:20:06,767 Yeah, she told me a lot about you. 465 00:20:06,769 --> 00:20:09,103 She told me about the shoplifting 466 00:20:09,105 --> 00:20:12,540 and the drinking and the pregnancy scare. 467 00:20:12,542 --> 00:20:15,576 But then she said she couldn't really talk about it. 468 00:20:15,578 --> 00:20:18,079 She's my rock. 469 00:20:18,081 --> 00:20:21,182 [Both chuckle] 470 00:20:21,184 --> 00:20:25,052 Maybe this was supposed to happen. 471 00:20:28,857 --> 00:20:33,494 Maybe, honey. Maybe. 472 00:20:35,497 --> 00:20:37,865 [Chuckles] 473 00:20:38,667 --> 00:20:41,269 There you are. 474 00:20:41,271 --> 00:20:44,071 Mom, we were kind of having a moment here. 475 00:20:44,073 --> 00:20:48,242 Perfect. Let's have a moment. 476 00:20:48,244 --> 00:20:52,113 I don't think you've ever seen these. 477 00:20:52,115 --> 00:20:55,283 This is from when we sent your mom to friendship camp. 478 00:20:55,285 --> 00:20:57,018 - She loved it. - No, I didn't. 479 00:20:57,020 --> 00:20:59,186 She loved it. See that big grin? 480 00:20:59,188 --> 00:21:00,321 That's Angela Schwartz. 481 00:21:00,323 --> 00:21:03,924 - That's you. - I didn't have braces. 482 00:21:03,926 --> 00:21:07,962 Never? Who am I thinking of? 483 00:21:07,964 --> 00:21:10,698 Angela Schwartz. 484 00:21:10,700 --> 00:21:12,300 Who's Angela Schwartz? 485 00:21:12,302 --> 00:21:14,602 The girl in the picture! 486 00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:25,802 - synced by peritta / corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 487 00:21:25,852 --> 00:21:30,402 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 35118

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