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1
00:00:01,235 --> 00:00:02,803
You know sometimes a 21 minute
15 second episode of Broad City
2
00:00:02,836 --> 00:00:06,240
isn't enough of the world
of Broad City for me.
3
00:00:06,273 --> 00:00:07,508
No, me niether.
4
00:00:07,541 --> 00:00:09,443
Right after this episode you
are gonna get behind the scenes
5
00:00:09,476 --> 00:00:13,480
exclusive footage of how
our show Broad City is made.
6
00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:15,782
It is like a behind the
curtain look at Broad City.
7
00:00:15,816 --> 00:00:18,452
Very informative and
you're gonna dig it.
8
00:00:18,485 --> 00:00:20,754
Announcer: Stay tuned after the
episode for a behind the scenes
9
00:00:20,787 --> 00:00:22,489
look at the making of Broad City.
10
00:00:22,523 --> 00:00:24,057
- I love a good BTS
- Me too.
11
00:00:24,091 --> 00:00:27,094
- I love a hot BTS
- BTS to the BTS, baby.
12
00:00:28,095 --> 00:00:31,565
("Fuerza" by Tony Quattro playing)
13
00:00:38,405 --> 00:00:40,574
(grunts)
14
00:00:40,607 --> 00:00:43,677
(crashes to floor)
15
00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:45,312
You don't have to take that down.
16
00:00:45,345 --> 00:00:46,613
She'll think it's, like, a kooky
necklace holder or something.
17
00:00:46,647 --> 00:00:47,848
She'll never think it's a dildo.
18
00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,449
Oof, that hurts my heart.
19
00:00:49,483 --> 00:00:50,717
Yeah.
20
00:00:55,122 --> 00:00:56,323
(sniffs)
21
00:01:03,263 --> 00:01:05,399
I feel like she's gonna
know that you made it.
22
00:01:05,432 --> 00:01:06,500
Why?
23
00:01:06,533 --> 00:01:08,435
Just 'cause I don't call my mom
24
00:01:08,468 --> 00:01:10,237
"Abbi's Mom."
25
00:01:10,270 --> 00:01:11,872
(loud sigh)
26
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:14,408
? Four and three
and two and one-one ?
27
00:01:14,732 --> 00:01:18,078
Sync and corrections by rickSG
www.addic7ed.com
28
00:01:18,846 --> 00:01:20,914
And then we're gonna
do frozen hot chocolate.
29
00:01:20,948 --> 00:01:21,949
- Cool.
- And then after that,
30
00:01:21,982 --> 00:01:23,650
we're going to visit Santa at Macy's...
31
00:01:23,684 --> 00:01:25,152
- Totally.
- And then top it all off
32
00:01:25,185 --> 00:01:27,688
with a fancy dinner at Sushi Mambeaux!
33
00:01:27,721 --> 00:01:28,689
That's a lot of stuff.
34
00:01:28,722 --> 00:01:31,191
I like to keep it light
and fun with my mom.
35
00:01:31,225 --> 00:01:32,359
I mean, she's kind of conservative.
36
00:01:32,392 --> 00:01:35,128
So, I appreciate you cutting the cheese.
37
00:01:35,162 --> 00:01:36,797
(laughing)
38
00:01:36,830 --> 00:01:38,532
Cut the cheese, shit!
39
00:01:38,565 --> 00:01:41,201
I haven't said that since, like, 1997.
40
00:01:41,235 --> 00:01:43,337
(click, shimmering sound)
41
00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:46,840
Oh! Whoa! Yes, oh, my God!
42
00:01:46,874 --> 00:01:48,375
Thank God, I'm so sorry about that.
43
00:01:48,408 --> 00:01:50,477
Whoo! Okay.
44
00:01:50,511 --> 00:01:52,179
Back, baby, I'm back!
45
00:01:52,212 --> 00:01:54,348
(laughs)
46
00:01:54,381 --> 00:01:56,216
Yeah, but cut the cheese is excellent.
47
00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:58,852
Thank science for SAD lamps.
48
00:01:58,886 --> 00:01:59,920
Why don't they just
call them happy lamps
49
00:01:59,953 --> 00:02:01,388
'cause, like, sad lamps
50
00:02:01,421 --> 00:02:03,490
sounds so...
51
00:02:03,524 --> 00:02:04,625
sad.
52
00:02:04,658 --> 00:02:05,859
Oh, it's not, like, "sad".
53
00:02:05,893 --> 00:02:08,562
It stands for "Seasonal
Affective Disorder,"
54
00:02:08,595 --> 00:02:10,898
which indicates the
annual cycle of depression
55
00:02:10,931 --> 00:02:13,567
that I and others like me experience
56
00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:15,302
every winter, all winter.
57
00:02:15,335 --> 00:02:16,303
(chuckling)
58
00:02:16,336 --> 00:02:18,338
And fall.
59
00:02:18,372 --> 00:02:20,207
And, like, uh...
60
00:02:20,240 --> 00:02:21,408
the end of summer too.
61
00:02:21,441 --> 00:02:23,410
It's that sadness.
62
00:02:23,443 --> 00:02:25,312
You know, that chews
us up and spits us out
63
00:02:25,345 --> 00:02:26,580
- into the black abyss.
- Okay...
64
00:02:26,613 --> 00:02:27,581
(shimmering sound) Okay, here we go.
65
00:02:27,614 --> 00:02:28,882
- Okay.
- Oh, wow!
66
00:02:28,916 --> 00:02:31,218
There we go. (laughing)
67
00:02:31,251 --> 00:02:32,753
Up and down... Yeah.
68
00:02:32,786 --> 00:02:36,223
Juicing up, uh, unh, ah!
69
00:02:36,256 --> 00:02:38,525
- Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.
- Oh, yeah.
70
00:02:38,559 --> 00:02:40,260
- Whoo!
- You know, Ilana,
71
00:02:40,294 --> 00:02:42,329
maybe you just increase your medication?
72
00:02:42,362 --> 00:02:45,499
No, no, no, I don't need to do that.
73
00:02:45,532 --> 00:02:47,434
'Cause I have been steadily
decreasing my dosage
74
00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:49,269
of antidepressants for two years.
75
00:02:49,303 --> 00:02:52,606
And I'm supplementing anyway
with my SAD lamp, happy lamp!
76
00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:54,274
(laughing)
77
00:02:54,308 --> 00:02:55,342
Remember that?!
78
00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:57,211
And it is working like a charm.
79
00:02:57,244 --> 00:02:58,512
Yeah, seems like it's working.
80
00:02:58,545 --> 00:02:59,546
Well...
81
00:02:59,580 --> 00:03:01,882
(singing cheerily)
82
00:03:01,915 --> 00:03:03,951
She'll be okay.
83
00:03:03,984 --> 00:03:07,387
??
84
00:03:08,488 --> 00:03:09,456
(knock on door)
85
00:03:09,489 --> 00:03:11,925
Okay... (clears throat)
86
00:03:14,828 --> 00:03:16,463
- Yay!
- Yay!
87
00:03:16,496 --> 00:03:17,531
Mom!
88
00:03:17,564 --> 00:03:18,932
Abbi!
89
00:03:18,966 --> 00:03:21,435
My little garbage pail girl!
90
00:03:21,468 --> 00:03:22,769
Okay, it was just a phase.
91
00:03:22,803 --> 00:03:23,770
(laughing)
92
00:03:23,804 --> 00:03:24,972
For a couple years.
93
00:03:25,005 --> 00:03:26,907
Oh, gosh, everything looks so clean.
94
00:03:26,940 --> 00:03:28,976
Yeah.
95
00:03:29,009 --> 00:03:31,612
(Abbi) It's basically
just some glue, toothpicks.
96
00:03:31,645 --> 00:03:33,673
And I just did little designs
'cause I wanted you to see
97
00:03:33,708 --> 00:03:34,948
what kinds of cheeses that it was.
98
00:03:34,982 --> 00:03:35,949
It's not a big deal.
99
00:03:35,983 --> 00:03:38,252
It's a very big deal.
100
00:03:38,285 --> 00:03:40,320
You are so creative.
101
00:03:40,354 --> 00:03:43,323
I'm so proud of you, living as an artist
102
00:03:43,357 --> 00:03:46,793
in your perfect
apartment in the big city.
103
00:03:46,827 --> 00:03:47,995
So, what are we gonna do today?
104
00:03:48,028 --> 00:03:52,900
Well, you know, I would love
to take you to my studio space.
105
00:03:52,933 --> 00:03:56,737
Uh, but I'm actually
renting it out, so...
106
00:03:56,770 --> 00:03:59,039
phie is the name of the artist
107
00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:01,041
that I'm renting it to, Sophie.
108
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:03,210
She is just, like, she's super funky.
109
00:04:03,244 --> 00:04:04,978
Abbi, we need to be
honest with each other.
110
00:04:05,012 --> 00:04:07,581
Yeah, you know what, she's
not, she's not that funky.
111
00:04:07,614 --> 00:04:09,139
- She's, like, a pretty mainstream artist.
- Abbi, stop.
112
00:04:09,174 --> 00:04:11,485
I meant me. I need
to be honest with you.
113
00:04:11,518 --> 00:04:12,753
Okay.
114
00:04:12,786 --> 00:04:16,623
I had a lump in my breast.
115
00:04:16,657 --> 00:04:17,824
A big one.
116
00:04:17,858 --> 00:04:19,326
- Mom, what?
- No, but it's benign.
117
00:04:19,359 --> 00:04:22,529
If I had cancer, I would let you know.
118
00:04:22,563 --> 00:04:24,364
But I didn't wanna worry you.
119
00:04:24,398 --> 00:04:28,669
Um... okay, I mean, I
guess I understand that.
120
00:04:28,702 --> 00:04:30,508
This is so upsetting, like,
you had to go through all this.
121
00:04:30,543 --> 00:04:35,075
No, it's not upsetting. It's
good because it made me realize
122
00:04:35,108 --> 00:04:38,445
all the things I still wanna do.
123
00:04:38,478 --> 00:04:41,615
I've never, um, had a martini.
124
00:04:41,648 --> 00:04:43,617
I never went to a play at night.
125
00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:44,651
Matinees.
126
00:04:44,685 --> 00:04:46,720
I've never had a pineapple barbecue
127
00:04:46,753 --> 00:04:48,555
pizza thing from Hawaii.
128
00:04:48,589 --> 00:04:50,324
I've never gone without underwear.
129
00:04:50,357 --> 00:04:53,560
I wanna wear clothes
meant for black women.
130
00:04:53,594 --> 00:04:55,329
That's an interesting one.
131
00:04:55,362 --> 00:04:58,532
And I would really
love to have one, like,
132
00:04:58,565 --> 00:05:01,068
naughty girls' night out with you.
133
00:05:01,101 --> 00:05:03,003
Could we do that?
134
00:05:03,036 --> 00:05:04,004
Yeah.
135
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:05,706
(Bevers) Did you call me?!
136
00:05:05,739 --> 00:05:07,641
Bevers! No! What?
137
00:05:07,674 --> 00:05:08,909
Oh, shh, uh...
138
00:05:08,942 --> 00:05:10,410
Bevers, Jesus!
139
00:05:10,444 --> 00:05:11,578
Okay, wow.
140
00:05:11,612 --> 00:05:12,913
Sorry, I thought you called me.
141
00:05:12,946 --> 00:05:15,349
When do I ever call you?
142
00:05:15,382 --> 00:05:18,552
Anyway... who's this lovely creature?
143
00:05:18,585 --> 00:05:20,888
Well, I'm Joanne.
144
00:05:20,921 --> 00:05:22,823
Joanne? I'm Matthew.
145
00:05:22,856 --> 00:05:27,561
Or Abbi's mom is how you
should introduce yourself.
146
00:05:27,594 --> 00:05:29,496
Uh, ugh...
147
00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:32,065
Okay, Bevers, just if
you could put clothes on
148
00:05:32,099 --> 00:05:34,902
or stay in your room.
149
00:05:34,935 --> 00:05:37,938
Joanne, until next time.
150
00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:40,073
Oh, well... Okay.
151
00:05:40,107 --> 00:05:41,408
(chuckling)
152
00:05:41,441 --> 00:05:43,377
Yes, until next time.
153
00:05:43,410 --> 00:05:44,378
Your scarf.
154
00:05:44,411 --> 00:05:46,847
Thanks.
155
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:49,016
- (Joanne) Cute.
- Mom?
156
00:05:49,049 --> 00:05:50,684
Furry little bear.
157
00:05:50,717 --> 00:05:54,021
(horn honks)
158
00:05:54,054 --> 00:05:57,090
Bonjour, listen up, hunties.
159
00:05:57,124 --> 00:05:59,760
It's that time of year.
160
00:05:59,793 --> 00:06:01,128
Spring cleaning.
161
00:06:01,161 --> 00:06:02,896
Come on, Marcel, please!
162
00:06:02,930 --> 00:06:04,097
What do you mean, spring cleaning?
163
00:06:04,131 --> 00:06:07,401
Well, I know we normally pool out tips.
164
00:06:07,434 --> 00:06:11,438
But tonight, it's winner takes all.
165
00:06:11,471 --> 00:06:15,108
As in she who makes the most tips
166
00:06:15,142 --> 00:06:18,111
gets all the damn tips.
167
00:06:18,145 --> 00:06:21,148
And whoever makes the
least amount of tips,
168
00:06:21,181 --> 00:06:22,983
your ass will be fired.
169
00:06:23,016 --> 00:06:23,951
(gasps)
170
00:06:23,984 --> 00:06:25,520
I owe so much money
to so many bad people.
171
00:06:25,555 --> 00:06:28,422
I'll need two weeks
because I have to relocate.
172
00:06:28,455 --> 00:06:33,060
You are all enemies now.
173
00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:34,428
That's all.
174
00:06:34,461 --> 00:06:37,931
??
175
00:06:39,967 --> 00:06:43,737
Have you guys ever fallen asleep
here and just spent the night?
176
00:06:43,770 --> 00:06:45,572
If you ever have to,
177
00:06:45,606 --> 00:06:48,509
it's surprisingly not soul crushing.
178
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:50,844
(Abbi) You know what
would be really nuts?
179
00:06:50,878 --> 00:06:53,680
I was thinking maybe
we could split an app
180
00:06:53,714 --> 00:06:55,816
or, like, get a charcuterie plate.
181
00:06:55,849 --> 00:07:00,420
But I don't think we need
to do anything too... crazy.
182
00:07:03,023 --> 00:07:04,157
The dress.
183
00:07:06,228 --> 00:07:10,499
(switch clicks, shimmering sound) Oh!
184
00:07:10,532 --> 00:07:11,667
Whoo!
185
00:07:11,700 --> 00:07:13,836
Unh!
186
00:07:15,037 --> 00:07:16,071
Mwah.
187
00:07:16,104 --> 00:07:17,682
??
188
00:07:17,973 --> 00:07:19,608
Bada boom, Marcel.
189
00:07:19,642 --> 00:07:20,509
(sniffing)
190
00:07:20,543 --> 00:07:22,645
Smells like a winning
kind of night, baby!
191
00:07:22,678 --> 00:07:25,181
I'm glad you think
so, tiny tits. (laughs)
192
00:07:25,214 --> 00:07:27,917
Oh, and here is my best and her mother.
193
00:07:27,950 --> 00:07:29,318
They are my lucky charms this evening.
194
00:07:29,352 --> 00:07:32,321
Well, keep 'em close.
You're gonna need 'em.
195
00:07:32,355 --> 00:07:33,289
Hmm.
196
00:07:34,590 --> 00:07:36,258
There's my favorite ass.
197
00:07:36,292 --> 00:07:38,027
Joanne?
198
00:07:38,060 --> 00:07:39,528
Look at you, Joanne.
199
00:07:39,562 --> 00:07:41,998
- Oh, my goodness.
- Hey, pretty girl.
200
00:07:42,031 --> 00:07:45,167
Wow, Mama, you look so hot.
201
00:07:45,201 --> 00:07:47,670
Your body is amazing dude!
202
00:07:47,703 --> 00:07:49,338
- Really?
- You are an AMILF,
203
00:07:49,372 --> 00:07:50,339
Abbi's mom, I'd like to...
204
00:07:50,373 --> 00:07:51,340
Friend!
205
00:07:51,374 --> 00:07:52,441
Friend!
206
00:07:52,475 --> 00:07:53,542
- Yeah, friends.
- Friends.
207
00:07:53,576 --> 00:07:54,577
- We're just friends.
- Yeah.
208
00:07:54,610 --> 00:07:56,212
Well, let me take you to
your table before I, uh,
209
00:07:56,245 --> 00:07:57,513
do something really weird.
210
00:07:57,546 --> 00:07:59,015
(Abbi) Better get to the table.
211
00:07:59,048 --> 00:08:02,651
("Dans La Radio" by Jacques playing)
212
00:08:02,685 --> 00:08:04,954
It has a subtle balance
of foie gras and seaweed.
213
00:08:04,987 --> 00:08:06,555
- That's it.
- Okay.
214
00:08:06,589 --> 00:08:07,923
Any questions?
215
00:08:07,957 --> 00:08:09,925
Um, oh.
216
00:08:09,959 --> 00:08:10,926
Joanne?
217
00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:12,695
What is good to drink here?
218
00:08:12,728 --> 00:08:16,465
Oh, um, there's, uh,
an espresso matcha tea,
219
00:08:16,499 --> 00:08:17,877
if you wanna get a little buzzy.
220
00:08:17,912 --> 00:08:19,635
What is that?
221
00:08:19,669 --> 00:08:21,637
Oh, this is, uh, the Mambeaux-Tini.
222
00:08:21,671 --> 00:08:23,205
It's our signature cocktail.
223
00:08:23,239 --> 00:08:25,041
It has alcohol in it.
224
00:08:25,074 --> 00:08:27,243
Mom, do you wanna get those?
225
00:08:27,276 --> 00:08:28,244
Okay.
226
00:08:28,277 --> 00:08:29,412
Oh, my God!
227
00:08:29,445 --> 00:08:32,081
(singsong) Bad girls! Yeow!
228
00:08:32,114 --> 00:08:34,050
Let's do shots.
229
00:08:34,083 --> 00:08:36,385
I have never done that.
230
00:08:36,419 --> 00:08:37,420
(Ilana laughs)
231
00:08:37,453 --> 00:08:39,055
(Abbi) Um...
232
00:08:39,088 --> 00:08:41,424
Okay, yeah, let's do shots, I guess.
233
00:08:41,457 --> 00:08:45,728
? Talkin' 'bout them
bad, bad, girls whoo ?
234
00:08:45,761 --> 00:08:49,231
These are our infamous
sake-ros� shots.
235
00:08:49,265 --> 00:08:50,733
I'll be back in a little bit.
236
00:08:52,568 --> 00:08:53,669
(clears throat)
237
00:08:53,703 --> 00:08:56,105
Well, you know, I don't think I've had
238
00:08:56,138 --> 00:08:58,341
hard liquor s...
239
00:08:58,374 --> 00:09:02,278
Well, since I got pregnant with you.
240
00:09:02,812 --> 00:09:04,881
Wow.
241
00:09:04,914 --> 00:09:06,415
Okay, well, let's do it, right?
242
00:09:06,449 --> 00:09:07,783
Yeah.
243
00:09:10,052 --> 00:09:10,887
Mmm.
244
00:09:13,422 --> 00:09:14,991
Did you finish it?
245
00:09:15,024 --> 00:09:16,559
Why do people do this?
246
00:09:16,592 --> 00:09:18,427
I don't think anyone knows.
247
00:09:18,461 --> 00:09:20,263
It's a mystery.
248
00:09:20,296 --> 00:09:21,364
Let's do another one.
249
00:09:21,397 --> 00:09:23,533
Uh, okay.
250
00:09:25,968 --> 00:09:27,203
Our signature sushi fondue.
251
00:09:27,236 --> 00:09:31,240
And for the blonde pixie spirit,
a pork belly hand roll to start.
252
00:09:31,274 --> 00:09:33,442
Ooh. Ooh.
253
00:09:37,113 --> 00:09:39,448
Well, uh, you all look
like you have money to burn
254
00:09:39,482 --> 00:09:40,650
and machismo to measure.
255
00:09:40,683 --> 00:09:45,454
So, let me let you know about
our award-winning caviar.
256
00:09:45,488 --> 00:09:48,424
Let's just say they eat Sushi
Mambeaux caviar in Michelin!
257
00:09:48,457 --> 00:09:50,793
(laughing)
258
00:09:54,163 --> 00:09:55,198
(exhales)
259
00:09:55,231 --> 00:09:56,299
(bleep)
260
00:09:56,332 --> 00:09:57,900
(Ilana) All winter... (chuckling)
261
00:09:57,934 --> 00:09:59,569
And fall. The end of summer too.
262
00:09:59,602 --> 00:10:00,536
(inhales)
263
00:10:00,570 --> 00:10:02,138
(voice echoing) You
know, I never tried it,
264
00:10:02,171 --> 00:10:03,306
the caviar, obviously.
265
00:10:03,339 --> 00:10:09,111
We're only allowed to eat
family-style meals around here.
266
00:10:09,145 --> 00:10:10,112
You know, move.
267
00:10:10,146 --> 00:10:15,852
It's, like, uh, pigs
eating slop out of a trough
268
00:10:15,885 --> 00:10:16,953
at a country fair.
269
00:10:16,986 --> 00:10:18,054
(scoffs, plate sliding)
270
00:10:18,087 --> 00:10:20,523
Being measured for our weight in bacon.
271
00:10:23,659 --> 00:10:27,864
Hm.
272
00:10:27,897 --> 00:10:29,132
Oh, God.
273
00:10:29,165 --> 00:10:30,500
Please work, please work.
274
00:10:30,533 --> 00:10:32,001
(click, shimmering sound) Please work.
275
00:10:32,034 --> 00:10:34,170
Please work.
276
00:10:34,203 --> 00:10:36,639
Please work, please work,
please... (knock on door)
277
00:10:36,672 --> 00:10:39,642
- (Abbi) Ilana?
- Abigail?
278
00:10:39,675 --> 00:10:41,511
Jesus.
279
00:10:41,544 --> 00:10:43,179
Dude, is this as
bright as it was before?
280
00:10:43,212 --> 00:10:44,447
I'm not feeling it!
281
00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:45,915
Uh, it's pretty (bleep) bright.
282
00:10:45,948 --> 00:10:47,250
It's just not doing it for me, man.
283
00:10:47,283 --> 00:10:48,251
I can't get the juice.
284
00:10:48,284 --> 00:10:49,619
What about...
285
00:10:53,089 --> 00:10:54,257
Oh, yeah.
286
00:10:54,290 --> 00:10:55,892
Oh, keep 'er coming.
287
00:10:55,925 --> 00:10:58,194
Oh, my God, that is amazing.
288
00:10:58,227 --> 00:10:59,629
Jeez!
289
00:10:59,662 --> 00:11:01,664
Oh, that's good.
290
00:11:01,697 --> 00:11:03,332
Ass of an angel.
291
00:11:03,366 --> 00:11:04,634
Mind of mental health MacGyver!
292
00:11:04,667 --> 00:11:06,602
Thank you! Oh!
293
00:11:06,636 --> 00:11:08,204
That was incredible, I'm good.
294
00:11:08,237 --> 00:11:10,200
- Awesome, great.
- What's up? You wanna get weird?
295
00:11:10,235 --> 00:11:13,543
Okay, no, listen, my mom,
like, apparently had a lump
296
00:11:13,576 --> 00:11:15,378
in her breast, and she
didn't tell me about it.
297
00:11:15,411 --> 00:11:17,346
It's fine now, it's fine.
298
00:11:17,380 --> 00:11:18,681
But, like, it really
scared the shit out of me.
299
00:11:18,714 --> 00:11:22,218
And so tonight she wants to have, like,
a fun night, like, a really fun night.
300
00:11:22,251 --> 00:11:23,286
She wants more than that.
301
00:11:23,319 --> 00:11:24,287
The blue dress?
302
00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:26,222
Talk about lumps, girl.
303
00:11:26,255 --> 00:11:28,191
I know, I didn't ever
think my mom was hot?!
304
00:11:28,224 --> 00:11:29,192
I did.
305
00:11:29,225 --> 00:11:30,626
Cool.
306
00:11:30,660 --> 00:11:33,629
I know, I have a
timeless classic for you.
307
00:11:33,663 --> 00:11:35,398
Y'amagine?
308
00:11:35,431 --> 00:11:39,101
??
309
00:11:42,638 --> 00:11:45,007
You really know your way
around that stuff, huh?
310
00:11:45,041 --> 00:11:46,409
Not really.
311
00:11:46,442 --> 00:11:47,977
(laughing)
312
00:11:48,010 --> 00:11:51,080
Okay, I smoke, like, sometimes.
313
00:11:51,113 --> 00:11:53,416
All right, I smoke... I smoke a lot.
314
00:11:53,449 --> 00:11:54,517
(laughing)
315
00:11:54,550 --> 00:11:55,952
Okay, are you ready?
316
00:11:55,985 --> 00:11:56,953
Okay.
317
00:11:56,986 --> 00:11:58,955
I'm gonna light it, and
you're gonna take a gasp
318
00:11:58,988 --> 00:12:00,990
like Dad asked you to get back together.
319
00:12:01,023 --> 00:12:03,025
(coughing) Not I think
about that at night.
320
00:12:03,059 --> 00:12:04,026
(coughing)
321
00:12:04,060 --> 00:12:08,598
Okay? Are you okay?
Are you okay? (laughing)
322
00:12:08,631 --> 00:12:09,632
Whoa.
323
00:12:10,733 --> 00:12:12,235
Whoa.
324
00:12:12,268 --> 00:12:14,270
My head feels like a balloon.
325
00:12:14,303 --> 00:12:16,172
Like one of those allergy commercials.
326
00:12:16,205 --> 00:12:17,240
(sniffs)
327
00:12:17,273 --> 00:12:19,275
Mom, you're high. (giggles)
328
00:12:19,308 --> 00:12:20,576
(both laughing)
329
00:12:20,610 --> 00:12:22,712
You know who else I think
smokes a lot of this?
330
00:12:22,745 --> 00:12:24,113
Who?
331
00:12:24,147 --> 00:12:25,348
Charlie Rose.
332
00:12:25,381 --> 00:12:26,919
Oh, my God.
333
00:12:26,954 --> 00:12:29,752
That voice and the
way he shoots the show
334
00:12:29,785 --> 00:12:31,721
like he's in a black hole.
335
00:12:31,754 --> 00:12:33,289
Yeah, there's no walls.
336
00:12:33,322 --> 00:12:34,991
- Right.
- It's just table.
337
00:12:35,024 --> 00:12:37,460
God, I would not wanna (bleep) him.
338
00:12:37,493 --> 00:12:39,195
(laughing)
339
00:12:39,228 --> 00:12:42,131
Dude, I don't think I've ever heard
340
00:12:42,165 --> 00:12:45,001
you say (bleep) like
that before. (laughing)
341
00:12:45,034 --> 00:12:46,102
Well, there it is.
342
00:12:46,135 --> 00:12:48,771
(laughing)
343
00:12:48,805 --> 00:12:52,542
It's so funny for you to call me a dude.
344
00:12:52,575 --> 00:12:53,776
Well, not, like, a dude.
345
00:12:53,810 --> 00:12:55,211
Just, like, dude.
346
00:12:55,244 --> 00:12:56,746
Like, anyone can be a dude.
347
00:12:56,779 --> 00:12:59,081
It's just like a friend thing.
348
00:12:59,115 --> 00:13:03,553
Aww... Well, then, cool...dude.
349
00:13:03,586 --> 00:13:05,221
Cool.
350
00:13:05,254 --> 00:13:08,024
You're getting good.
351
00:13:08,057 --> 00:13:08,791
I feel like that's good.
352
00:13:08,825 --> 00:13:10,270
I feel like it's good to start.
353
00:13:10,305 --> 00:13:11,494
I'll just do one more
on our way back in.
354
00:13:11,527 --> 00:13:13,296
Okay.
355
00:13:13,329 --> 00:13:14,397
(shimmering sound)
Juicing, juicing, juicing.
356
00:13:14,430 --> 00:13:16,766
(exhaling)
357
00:13:16,799 --> 00:13:17,800
? Work
358
00:13:17,834 --> 00:13:19,402
??
359
00:13:19,435 --> 00:13:21,070
? Work your shit out...
360
00:13:21,103 --> 00:13:22,271
(cash register dings)
361
00:13:22,305 --> 00:13:24,774
? One, two, three
362
00:13:24,807 --> 00:13:27,343
(all) Mambeaux-Tini!
363
00:13:27,376 --> 00:13:30,313
? Work your shit out...
364
00:13:30,346 --> 00:13:31,681
Ooh.
365
00:13:31,714 --> 00:13:32,982
? Oh, girl
366
00:13:33,015 --> 00:13:35,351
? Better work, work, work,
work ? (cash register dinging)
367
00:13:35,384 --> 00:13:36,819
? Work your shit
368
00:13:36,853 --> 00:13:37,820
(echoing) ? Out... ?
369
00:13:37,854 --> 00:13:41,424
(exhales)
370
00:13:41,457 --> 00:13:42,792
(voice echoing) Let
me tell you something.
371
00:13:42,825 --> 00:13:44,293
Life is trash.
372
00:13:44,327 --> 00:13:46,729
(long sigh)
373
00:13:49,398 --> 00:13:51,067
(silverware clanking)
374
00:13:54,270 --> 00:13:57,740
??
375
00:13:59,275 --> 00:14:01,043
Move! Go!
376
00:14:04,881 --> 00:14:07,717
Out of my way!
377
00:14:07,750 --> 00:14:08,718
Ugh!
378
00:14:10,753 --> 00:14:14,490
(crunching)
379
00:14:14,524 --> 00:14:15,725
It just tastes better.
380
00:14:15,758 --> 00:14:17,860
Like, stuff just tastes better, right?
381
00:14:17,894 --> 00:14:20,096
I'm pot.
382
00:14:20,129 --> 00:14:21,330
(snorts, laughs)
383
00:14:21,364 --> 00:14:24,367
(suppressed laughter)
384
00:14:33,476 --> 00:14:35,578
Oh, my God.
385
00:14:35,611 --> 00:14:36,679
Abbi...
386
00:14:36,712 --> 00:14:38,881
Oh, jeez.
387
00:14:38,915 --> 00:14:41,250
What?
388
00:14:41,284 --> 00:14:43,319
I just wanna ask you a question.
389
00:14:43,352 --> 00:14:45,721
Okay.
390
00:14:45,755 --> 00:14:47,423
How many men have you slept with?
391
00:14:47,456 --> 00:14:50,393
Whoa, okay, um...
392
00:14:50,426 --> 00:14:52,128
I don't know if I wanna, like...
393
00:14:52,161 --> 00:14:54,597
- It's just, like, a lot to...
- No, no, I'm just curious.
394
00:14:54,630 --> 00:14:58,334
I don't... have no idea
what people do these days.
395
00:14:58,367 --> 00:15:03,139
(bleep), okay.
396
00:15:03,172 --> 00:15:04,507
We're being honest.
397
00:15:04,540 --> 00:15:07,143
I'm just gonna... gonna do it.
398
00:15:07,176 --> 00:15:09,412
We're gonna go there and
we're gonna do it right now.
399
00:15:09,445 --> 00:15:10,413
32.
400
00:15:10,446 --> 00:15:13,282
Jesus (bleep) Christ.
401
00:15:13,316 --> 00:15:15,351
Wow.
402
00:15:15,384 --> 00:15:16,886
Wow, I have had three.
403
00:15:16,919 --> 00:15:18,721
I've slept with three.
404
00:15:18,754 --> 00:15:21,290
My whole life, 55 years.
405
00:15:21,324 --> 00:15:22,925
Paul Kafferty, my first boyfriend
406
00:15:22,959 --> 00:15:24,627
who I think was gay anyway.
407
00:15:24,660 --> 00:15:26,262
Your father.
408
00:15:26,295 --> 00:15:28,531
- And now Neil.
- Okay.
409
00:15:28,564 --> 00:15:30,399
My "husband," Neil.
410
00:15:30,433 --> 00:15:31,400
You are married.
411
00:15:31,434 --> 00:15:34,437
Well, we haven't made
love in over a month.
412
00:15:34,470 --> 00:15:36,939
And if we're being honest,
it's more like making like.
413
00:15:36,973 --> 00:15:41,944
And...
414
00:15:41,978 --> 00:15:46,182
I just wish I would've
(bleep) up a little more.
415
00:15:46,215 --> 00:15:48,316
I wish I would've
(bleeped) a little more.
416
00:15:48,351 --> 00:15:49,452
Oh.
417
00:15:49,485 --> 00:15:52,655
You know, I never had sex with...
418
00:15:52,688 --> 00:15:55,324
with a man who didn't speak English.
419
00:15:55,358 --> 00:15:57,894
Not even an ESL guy.
420
00:15:57,927 --> 00:16:00,897
You know, I've never even had anal sex.
421
00:16:00,930 --> 00:16:02,832
I mean, not even a finger.
422
00:16:02,865 --> 00:16:04,901
I mean, it's not really
something you can ask for.
423
00:16:04,934 --> 00:16:07,436
Well, you just have to
actually just ask for it.
424
00:16:10,239 --> 00:16:11,240
(quiet sobbing) Oh, Mom, it's okay.
425
00:16:11,274 --> 00:16:12,519
- Abbi, it's not ok...
- I understand.
426
00:16:12,554 --> 00:16:13,943
No, it's fine, it's okay.
427
00:16:13,976 --> 00:16:17,547
Last week, I penetrated myself
with a bottle of cough syrup.
428
00:16:18,681 --> 00:16:22,285
Okay.
429
00:16:22,318 --> 00:16:23,986
Get out of the way!
430
00:16:24,020 --> 00:16:25,955
(shimmering sound)
431
00:16:25,988 --> 00:16:26,989
(loud moaning)
432
00:16:27,023 --> 00:16:28,658
Come on, uh!
433
00:16:28,691 --> 00:16:31,327
Ilana, it's me. Um...
434
00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:32,995
Dude, your tinfoil is broke!
435
00:16:33,029 --> 00:16:35,264
Okay, uh, dude, my mom
just told me she's, like,
436
00:16:35,298 --> 00:16:37,300
really sexually frustrated
and that she (bleep)
437
00:16:37,333 --> 00:16:39,435
a bottle of cough syrup last week.
438
00:16:39,469 --> 00:16:42,371
(voice echoing) I'm, like, I don't know if
I can, like, handle this level of honesty.
439
00:16:42,405 --> 00:16:43,973
I'm, like, is this
what being an adult is
440
00:16:44,006 --> 00:16:45,141
'cause this is terrifying.
441
00:16:45,174 --> 00:16:48,010
- Wait, are you, are you okay?
- That is really, really...
442
00:16:48,044 --> 00:16:49,846
- Really, really sad.
- Are you all right? Okay.
443
00:16:49,879 --> 00:16:51,881
That is so sad.
444
00:16:51,914 --> 00:16:54,317
Okay, dude, dude, dude,
what do you need from me?
445
00:16:54,350 --> 00:16:55,017
Okay, what do you need?
446
00:16:55,051 --> 00:16:56,719
- Bulbs.
- Bulbs?
447
00:16:56,752 --> 00:16:58,521
- Top shelf.
- Okay.
448
00:16:58,554 --> 00:17:01,023
Oh, that is some pathetic shit.
449
00:17:01,057 --> 00:17:01,858
Okay, found 'em, dude.
450
00:17:01,891 --> 00:17:04,894
Okay, give me ten... thousand watts.
451
00:17:04,927 --> 00:17:05,962
Okay, I got it!
452
00:17:05,995 --> 00:17:09,031
Hang on, dude, here we go!
453
00:17:09,065 --> 00:17:10,399
(grunts)
454
00:17:10,433 --> 00:17:11,400
Okay.
455
00:17:11,434 --> 00:17:12,902
(click, light powering up)
456
00:17:12,935 --> 00:17:15,471
(shimmering sound) Ahh!
457
00:17:15,505 --> 00:17:18,040
Oh! Okay, here we go.
458
00:17:18,074 --> 00:17:20,643
O-M-G!
459
00:17:20,676 --> 00:17:22,745
Serotonin rising.
460
00:17:22,778 --> 00:17:25,348
Dopamine flowing! Yes!
461
00:17:25,381 --> 00:17:26,682
Oh!
462
00:17:26,716 --> 00:17:28,885
It's working, dude, it's working.
463
00:17:28,918 --> 00:17:31,053
Oh, that's so good.
464
00:17:31,087 --> 00:17:32,588
Oh!
465
00:17:32,622 --> 00:17:34,357
Mm. It's working.
466
00:17:34,390 --> 00:17:36,659
God, that's f...
467
00:17:36,692 --> 00:17:37,927
(bleep)
468
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:39,061
(patrons groaning)
(Ilana) It's all good,
469
00:17:39,095 --> 00:17:40,062
just be right back on.
470
00:17:40,096 --> 00:17:42,899
(Joanne screams) Whoo! 32!
471
00:17:42,932 --> 00:17:45,601
My daughter (bleep) 32 guys.
472
00:17:45,635 --> 00:17:47,069
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, God, no, please, no.
473
00:17:47,103 --> 00:17:51,073
I'm pot!
474
00:17:51,107 --> 00:17:52,708
(shouting over each other)
475
00:17:52,742 --> 00:17:54,677
(screaming)
476
00:17:54,710 --> 00:17:55,678
(patrons gasping)
477
00:17:55,711 --> 00:17:57,380
Oh.
478
00:17:57,413 --> 00:17:58,879
I'm in so much trouble.
479
00:17:59,326 --> 00:18:02,295
Look, I don't know what
kind of Strong Island honkies
480
00:18:02,328 --> 00:18:04,831
you brought up in here, Other Tonya,
481
00:18:04,864 --> 00:18:08,735
but this is not Billy Joel's
go-to Dave and Buster's, okay?
482
00:18:08,768 --> 00:18:10,737
I'm, I'm sorry, Marcel.
483
00:18:10,770 --> 00:18:14,807
I wasn't on top of it,
and I just... don't care.
484
00:18:14,841 --> 00:18:17,310
I'm feeling really
depressed from the winter,
485
00:18:17,343 --> 00:18:20,847
and I'm just... numb.
486
00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:22,415
Do what you gotta do.
487
00:18:22,448 --> 00:18:24,017
I honestly don't give a shit.
488
00:18:24,050 --> 00:18:25,418
You should fire me.
489
00:18:25,451 --> 00:18:26,219
Oh, okay, you play...
490
00:18:26,252 --> 00:18:27,787
You playin' me right now, ain't you?
491
00:18:27,820 --> 00:18:29,489
Marcel, seriously. Take my tips.
492
00:18:29,522 --> 00:18:30,590
Do whatever you gotta do.
493
00:18:30,623 --> 00:18:35,028
Oh, please, man, you are
a... You are a career hustler.
494
00:18:35,061 --> 00:18:38,164
Whatever it is you're
doing is working on me.
495
00:18:38,198 --> 00:18:39,833
You know what? I want
you to pick (bleep) me.
496
00:18:39,866 --> 00:18:43,203
Get in there. Go on!
497
00:18:43,236 --> 00:18:45,371
Wait a minute?
498
00:18:45,405 --> 00:18:46,506
Are you for real?
499
00:18:46,539 --> 00:18:48,508
Mm-hmm.
500
00:18:48,541 --> 00:18:51,044
(bleep) it, I'll fire Owen.
501
00:18:51,077 --> 00:18:52,879
Owen's a terrible waiter.
502
00:18:52,912 --> 00:18:54,514
I don't care about... He's
rich, his family's rich.
503
00:18:54,547 --> 00:18:55,882
He'll be fine.
504
00:18:55,915 --> 00:18:57,984
But this depression shit.
505
00:18:58,017 --> 00:19:00,186
That's, that's next level bitchy.
506
00:19:00,220 --> 00:19:01,187
I'm kind of digging it.
507
00:19:01,221 --> 00:19:03,489
My dick is a little bit hard.
508
00:19:03,523 --> 00:19:04,924
I hope you never get better.
509
00:19:06,559 --> 00:19:08,795
Thanks.
510
00:19:08,828 --> 00:19:10,330
Drama in the alley.
511
00:19:15,134 --> 00:19:18,972
Mom! Mom! Oh, my God, Mom, stop it!
512
00:19:19,005 --> 00:19:20,473
What, Abbi, go!
513
00:19:20,507 --> 00:19:22,242
Are you kidding me right now! Stop it!
514
00:19:22,275 --> 00:19:25,178
Oh! This slut! Again?
515
00:19:25,211 --> 00:19:28,815
Ha! He called me a slut! Yes!
516
00:19:28,848 --> 00:19:30,049
I need to go back to med school.
517
00:19:30,083 --> 00:19:31,217
(sniffs)
518
00:19:31,251 --> 00:19:33,419
And rehab.
519
00:19:33,453 --> 00:19:37,423
Owen! Owen! Owen, you're fired!
520
00:19:37,457 --> 00:19:39,425
Marcel!
521
00:19:39,459 --> 00:19:41,415
I blew you, dude!
522
00:19:41,450 --> 00:19:42,671
And?
523
00:19:42,706 --> 00:19:45,231
(bleep) this! I'm out.
524
00:19:45,265 --> 00:19:49,335
I kissed a bisexual man with tongue.
525
00:19:49,369 --> 00:19:53,239
- (Abbi) Okay, that's great.
- You're so good, Joanne.
526
00:19:53,273 --> 00:19:54,941
Sushi Mambeaux.
527
00:19:54,974 --> 00:19:58,278
Always celebrating
cultural, fluid exchanges.
528
00:19:58,311 --> 00:19:59,445
(laughing)
529
00:20:01,447 --> 00:20:04,083
- Dad?
- Ooh!
530
00:20:04,117 --> 00:20:05,118
(scoffs)
531
00:20:05,151 --> 00:20:06,519
Ex-squeeze me?
532
00:20:06,553 --> 00:20:08,888
My mother is Aisha Johnson.
533
00:20:09,989 --> 00:20:11,124
So that...
534
00:20:11,157 --> 00:20:14,994
Yes, you are my fah...
535
00:20:16,930 --> 00:20:18,264
Well...
536
00:20:18,298 --> 00:20:20,567
your ass is fired too.
537
00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:22,135
I don't work with family.
538
00:20:22,168 --> 00:20:26,873
(laughing)
539
00:20:26,906 --> 00:20:28,508
Your ass is fired too!
540
00:20:29,153 --> 00:20:30,954
Dude, you know what? You were right.
541
00:20:30,988 --> 00:20:33,657
I should just up my
medication in the winter.
542
00:20:33,691 --> 00:20:36,593
You know, I was trying to
decrease for the pure and strong
543
00:20:36,627 --> 00:20:39,730
or something, but that's
shame and stigma right there.
544
00:20:39,763 --> 00:20:42,900
So, I get sick sometimes
and need medicine, who cares?
545
00:20:42,933 --> 00:20:44,301
That's awesome, dude.
546
00:20:44,334 --> 00:20:45,302
(Joanne) I found one.
547
00:20:45,335 --> 00:20:47,738
(Abbi) Ooh, that's pretty.
548
00:20:47,771 --> 00:20:49,289
- That is a good one.
- It's a good one.
549
00:20:49,324 --> 00:20:51,621
(vibrating) Whoa.
Holy sh... Ooh!
550
00:20:51,656 --> 00:20:53,610
So, I just wanted to
offer you this Mom Pak.
551
00:20:53,644 --> 00:20:55,612
It's really popular
among your demographic.
552
00:20:55,646 --> 00:20:57,648
She doesn't need a Mom Pak.
553
00:20:57,681 --> 00:20:58,716
She's a city girl now.
554
00:20:58,749 --> 00:20:59,850
Oh.
555
00:20:59,883 --> 00:21:01,385
Whatever.
556
00:21:01,418 --> 00:21:03,253
But thank you.
557
00:21:03,287 --> 00:21:04,621
Whoa.
558
00:21:04,655 --> 00:21:06,372
You know what this slut would love?
559
00:21:06,407 --> 00:21:07,472
Okay, let's... stop calling her that.
560
00:21:07,507 --> 00:21:08,659
- She loves it.
- I do.
561
00:21:08,692 --> 00:21:10,728
Okay.
562
00:21:10,761 --> 00:21:11,528
Dat.
563
00:21:11,562 --> 00:21:13,731
(Ilana clicking cheek) (Abbi) Yes.
564
00:21:13,764 --> 00:21:15,599
Mom, you're gonna love
that. You deserve the best.
565
00:21:15,632 --> 00:21:17,768
But, um, hand wash it only.
566
00:21:17,801 --> 00:21:19,303
Mm.
567
00:21:19,336 --> 00:21:21,538
Yeah, definitely just hand... wash it.
568
00:21:29,910 --> 00:21:31,177
? Work your shit out...
569
00:21:31,211 --> 00:21:34,047
Ooh.
570
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:35,515
(sighs)
571
00:21:35,549 --> 00:21:38,051
? Better work, work, work, work ?
572
00:21:38,084 --> 00:21:41,354
? Work your shit out... ?
573
00:21:41,388 --> 00:21:42,556
Mmm.
574
00:21:42,901 --> 00:21:45,837
(Broad City theme music)
575
00:21:47,172 --> 00:21:50,242
We rewrote this episode
four or five times
576
00:21:50,275 --> 00:21:52,210
it was really hard to
write about depression
577
00:21:52,244 --> 00:21:54,913
and make it funny and make it active.
578
00:21:54,946 --> 00:21:57,315
Abbi's mom, who is
played by Perry Gilpin,
579
00:21:57,349 --> 00:21:59,551
most popularly known from
Frasier, her storyline
580
00:21:59,584 --> 00:22:02,120
was depressing too and
it was just hard to make
581
00:22:02,153 --> 00:22:04,456
two storylines about depression funny.
582
00:22:04,489 --> 00:22:07,525
The light, I mean, the sad lamp.
583
00:22:07,559 --> 00:22:10,195
And Ilana's heightening of the sad lamp.
584
00:22:10,228 --> 00:22:13,287
That was one of our
trickier episodes this year
585
00:22:13,322 --> 00:22:16,167
- and I love it.
- I love it.
586
00:22:16,201 --> 00:22:18,837
But this depression shit,
that's next level bitchy,
587
00:22:18,870 --> 00:22:22,374
kind of digging it, my
dick is a little bit hard.
588
00:22:22,407 --> 00:22:24,943
I hope you never get better.
589
00:22:25,911 --> 00:22:27,345
Thanks.
590
00:22:27,379 --> 00:22:30,348
Working with RuPaul
Charles was such a dream
591
00:22:30,782 --> 00:22:33,217
and finding out just that
he like knows the show
592
00:22:33,251 --> 00:22:34,485
and liked it.
593
00:22:34,519 --> 00:22:36,654
He plays Marcel, who is Ilana's new boss
594
00:22:36,688 --> 00:22:38,523
at this restaurant she's working at.
595
00:22:38,556 --> 00:22:41,326
It is like a different
character for him too
596
00:22:41,359 --> 00:22:42,493
but it also is so him.
597
00:22:42,527 --> 00:22:45,830
I think the character is more
stern than Ru actually is.
598
00:22:45,863 --> 00:22:48,566
And also containing him
into like the manager
599
00:22:48,599 --> 00:22:49,567
of a restaurant,
600
00:22:49,600 --> 00:22:51,769
I don't know what kind
of strong island honky's
601
00:22:51,803 --> 00:22:55,606
you brought up in here
other Tonya, but this is not
602
00:22:55,640 --> 00:22:58,376
Billy Joel's go to
Dave and Busters okay?
603
00:22:58,409 --> 00:23:01,679
It was just such a
crazy like American honor
604
00:23:01,713 --> 00:23:03,715
to have Ru on our show.
605
00:23:03,748 --> 00:23:07,618
I've been watching RuPaul
on TV for my entire life,
606
00:23:07,652 --> 00:23:10,755
but to put Ru in the Broad City world,
607
00:23:10,788 --> 00:23:13,257
it felt so right, it felt like
608
00:23:13,291 --> 00:23:15,026
he's been here the whole time.
609
00:23:15,059 --> 00:23:16,661
[Director] Action.
610
00:23:16,694 --> 00:23:20,264
[Ru] Fuck me, put your fucking
foot in my god damn pussy,
611
00:23:20,298 --> 00:23:21,984
you know?
612
00:23:22,834 --> 00:23:23,635
Start again.
613
00:23:23,668 --> 00:23:26,537
(clears throat)
614
00:23:27,605 --> 00:23:30,675
This is such a dream come true.
615
00:23:30,708 --> 00:23:34,312
(Broad City theme music)
616
00:23:34,362 --> 00:23:38,912
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