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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:26,729 --> 00:00:28,044 Oyster. Shiitake. 2 00:00:28,131 --> 00:00:29,654 - Ahh... maitake. - Dang. 3 00:00:30,099 --> 00:00:31,332 Touch of Himalayan sea salt. 4 00:00:31,434 --> 00:00:32,867 Himalayan sea salt. 5 00:00:32,969 --> 00:00:34,368 Okay, okay, morels. 6 00:00:34,470 --> 00:00:36,504 Spongy mushroom in a dark sauce. 7 00:00:36,606 --> 00:00:37,805 - So good. - So good. 8 00:00:37,807 --> 00:00:38,806 Fennell seeds, please. 9 00:00:38,908 --> 00:00:40,040 Yes. 10 00:00:40,143 --> 00:00:41,375 Have you ever heard of hen of the woods? 11 00:00:41,477 --> 00:00:43,444 Yeah, I've heard of hen of the woods. 12 00:00:43,546 --> 00:00:45,212 - No, I know. - Hen of the woods are 13 00:00:45,314 --> 00:00:46,947 literally, like, what? 14 00:00:47,049 --> 00:00:49,250 Hen of the woods are literally, like, what? 15 00:00:49,352 --> 00:00:51,152 - Exactly. - Oh, portabella. 16 00:00:51,254 --> 00:00:53,849 - Oh, obvious. That's, like, durr. - Durr. 17 00:00:53,884 --> 00:00:55,122 Well, what are these ones called? 18 00:00:55,224 --> 00:00:57,591 I think they're just called shrooms. 19 00:00:57,693 --> 00:00:59,460 - Yeah. - Shrooms. 20 00:01:01,831 --> 00:01:03,164 Whew! 21 00:01:03,266 --> 00:01:05,065 (squealing) 22 00:01:05,168 --> 00:01:06,767 So, the fat in the yogurt 23 00:01:06,869 --> 00:01:09,603 activates the psilocybin in the mushrooms, however, 24 00:01:09,705 --> 00:01:13,073 it slow down digestion, thus yielding the perfect 25 00:01:13,176 --> 00:01:14,909 stroganina timeline for today's trip. 26 00:01:15,011 --> 00:01:16,377 All right. (sighing) 27 00:01:19,582 --> 00:01:21,015 B-R-B, life. 28 00:01:21,117 --> 00:01:23,451 "Hwelcome" to "hwitch hworld," baby. 29 00:01:26,088 --> 00:01:27,288 I could eat this every day. 30 00:01:27,390 --> 00:01:30,858 Yeah, it's... It tastes really good. 31 00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:33,060 Whistle, Tootsie Pop. 32 00:01:33,162 --> 00:01:35,830 Water, charger, passports, 33 00:01:35,932 --> 00:01:37,498 dreamcatcher, backup dreamcatcher. 34 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:38,666 So, are you feeling anything yet? 35 00:01:38,768 --> 00:01:40,335 - No. Did you pee? - Um, I did. 36 00:01:40,503 --> 00:01:43,804 Like, in the bathroom. Not, like, right this minute. 37 00:01:45,741 --> 00:01:47,775 (gasping) 38 00:01:47,877 --> 00:01:49,210 Dude... 39 00:01:49,312 --> 00:01:51,612 are you seeing what I'm seeing? 40 00:01:55,985 --> 00:01:57,718 The dust ruffle's blowing, 41 00:01:57,820 --> 00:02:01,121 as if in the wind, but the windows are shut. 42 00:02:13,970 --> 00:02:16,303 (both, echoing) The dust ruffle's blowing, as if in the wind, 43 00:02:16,405 --> 00:02:17,671 but the windows are shut! 44 00:02:17,773 --> 00:02:20,107 (voice) ? Four and three and... ? 45 00:02:22,879 --> 00:02:25,112 So you are, like, feeling it? 46 00:02:25,214 --> 00:02:26,313 Uh... 47 00:02:26,415 --> 00:02:27,915 (high-pitched) yeah. 48 00:02:28,017 --> 00:02:30,351 ? Four and three and two and one-one ? 49 00:02:31,060 --> 00:02:34,508 Sync and corrections by rickSG www.addic7ed.com 50 00:02:34,857 --> 00:02:37,725 Then I realized, I don't have permanent mono, 51 00:02:37,827 --> 00:02:39,527 I'm just a little allergic to almond milk. 52 00:02:39,629 --> 00:02:41,662 - Can I just say one thing? - Please, say it. 53 00:02:41,764 --> 00:02:44,031 Love is cool. It's just cool. 54 00:02:44,133 --> 00:02:47,134 Love is cool. It's like the cure. 55 00:02:48,938 --> 00:02:51,005 (whistling, booming) 56 00:02:54,577 --> 00:02:56,243 I mean, can I just say one thing? 57 00:02:56,345 --> 00:02:57,778 Please, say it. 58 00:02:57,880 --> 00:02:59,680 Sometimes I think about babies. 59 00:02:59,782 --> 00:03:01,181 I think about it all the time. 60 00:03:02,451 --> 00:03:04,785 A person pussy-poops another person. 61 00:03:04,887 --> 00:03:06,387 And then produces milk 62 00:03:06,489 --> 00:03:08,689 to make it grow to be human-sized? 63 00:03:08,791 --> 00:03:10,925 That's comic book shit. 64 00:03:11,027 --> 00:03:13,093 Moms are literal superheroes. 65 00:03:13,195 --> 00:03:14,828 I mean, can you imagine 66 00:03:14,931 --> 00:03:18,432 how much love you must feel when you have a baby? 67 00:03:18,534 --> 00:03:20,267 They have supa-dupa love, 68 00:03:20,369 --> 00:03:21,702 like that song, 69 00:03:21,804 --> 00:03:24,271 "Supa Duper Love," by Joss Stone. 70 00:03:24,373 --> 00:03:26,774 That's the (bleep) power! 71 00:03:26,876 --> 00:03:28,676 God, we're gonna be good moms. 72 00:03:28,778 --> 00:03:29,944 Hey, get outta the way. 73 00:03:31,914 --> 00:03:33,113 Is it weird my nipples are sore? 74 00:03:33,215 --> 00:03:34,582 No, that is perfectly normal. 75 00:03:34,684 --> 00:03:35,616 Mine are bleeding. 76 00:03:35,718 --> 00:03:37,451 (cat screeching) 77 00:03:39,555 --> 00:03:41,355 (car horn honking) 78 00:03:43,292 --> 00:03:45,859 Did you ever think about getting a bra for your butt? 79 00:03:45,962 --> 00:03:47,661 (wolf-whistling) No... do you think I should? 80 00:03:47,763 --> 00:03:49,330 No way. 81 00:03:49,432 --> 00:03:50,931 Let 'em swang, sister. 82 00:03:51,033 --> 00:03:52,466 Woo! Woohoo! 83 00:03:52,568 --> 00:03:53,767 Look at 'em go! 84 00:03:53,869 --> 00:03:55,836 That is a powerful ass. 85 00:03:55,938 --> 00:03:57,705 Feeling it! (chuckling) 86 00:04:01,677 --> 00:04:03,110 Oh, boy. 87 00:04:03,212 --> 00:04:04,211 Oh, girl. 88 00:04:04,313 --> 00:04:06,347 Tunnels are so intense. 89 00:04:06,449 --> 00:04:08,649 They're a microcosm of the whole trip. 90 00:04:08,751 --> 00:04:10,184 A microcosm! 91 00:04:10,286 --> 00:04:11,919 We're okay, we're okay, take my hand. 92 00:04:13,556 --> 00:04:15,823 Oh... 93 00:04:15,925 --> 00:04:18,425 (cawing) 94 00:04:22,331 --> 00:04:25,799 (both screaming) 95 00:04:25,901 --> 00:04:27,635 I'm squeezing my core. I don't know why. 96 00:04:27,737 --> 00:04:29,870 - It's watching us! - Oh, my God, go faster, go faster. 97 00:04:29,972 --> 00:04:32,606 (Ilana screaming) 98 00:04:35,578 --> 00:04:36,810 Oh, I love you, man. 99 00:04:36,912 --> 00:04:39,046 I love you too, man. 100 00:04:39,148 --> 00:04:41,148 ?? 101 00:04:42,652 --> 00:04:44,585 Turned out she was convicted of arson, 102 00:04:44,687 --> 00:04:46,420 but now she's a crossfit trainer. 103 00:04:46,522 --> 00:04:48,055 Eliot says she's the best one. 104 00:04:48,157 --> 00:04:51,191 That makes so much sense... 105 00:04:53,429 --> 00:04:56,397 Whoa. Did you hear that? 106 00:04:56,499 --> 00:04:58,399 ?? (different chimes) 107 00:04:58,501 --> 00:04:59,833 (chimes, cymbal crash) 108 00:04:59,935 --> 00:05:01,468 This is amazing! 109 00:05:01,570 --> 00:05:03,404 ?? (echoing) 110 00:05:03,506 --> 00:05:06,240 Oh! Uh! Uh! Uh! 111 00:05:06,342 --> 00:05:07,875 Yeah! 112 00:05:07,977 --> 00:05:10,644 Woo! Woo! Woohoo! 113 00:05:10,746 --> 00:05:13,414 ?? (ah-oo-gah horn) 114 00:05:13,516 --> 00:05:15,149 (voice) Oh, oh! 115 00:05:15,251 --> 00:05:17,151 (voice) Oh, yeah! 116 00:05:17,253 --> 00:05:18,786 Mm, mmm! Mmm! 117 00:05:18,888 --> 00:05:20,679 Ooh, ahh, ahh! 118 00:05:21,424 --> 00:05:23,891 - Ahh! - Yass! 119 00:05:23,993 --> 00:05:25,826 - Abbi! - Ilana! 120 00:05:25,928 --> 00:05:27,428 - Oh, Abbi! - Oh, Ilana! 121 00:05:27,530 --> 00:05:29,263 Abbi! 122 00:05:29,365 --> 00:05:32,767 Abbi!... (gibberish) 123 00:05:32,869 --> 00:05:34,602 Ilana! 124 00:05:34,704 --> 00:05:36,871 (gibberish) 125 00:05:36,973 --> 00:05:38,939 (car horns honking) 126 00:05:40,009 --> 00:05:42,676 Holy shit, music is so powerful. 127 00:05:42,779 --> 00:05:45,079 Something feels... off. 128 00:05:45,181 --> 00:05:46,480 It is time for us to go. 129 00:05:46,582 --> 00:05:49,183 Oh, I feel it, too. Down here, down here. 130 00:05:51,721 --> 00:05:53,988 (both) Whoa! 131 00:05:54,090 --> 00:05:56,724 - (voice) Look at that. - Hi! 132 00:05:56,826 --> 00:05:59,460 - Bingo Bronson! - Oh, hi! 133 00:06:00,763 --> 00:06:02,797 - Hey, Ilana. - Oh. 134 00:06:02,899 --> 00:06:04,265 (voice) It's gorgeous. 135 00:06:04,367 --> 00:06:05,766 Gorgeous. 136 00:06:05,868 --> 00:06:08,068 Mmm... watermelon. 137 00:06:08,171 --> 00:06:10,471 Love is so cool. 138 00:06:10,573 --> 00:06:12,273 It really is. 139 00:06:12,375 --> 00:06:13,974 We should write that down. 140 00:06:14,076 --> 00:06:15,643 For what? 141 00:06:15,745 --> 00:06:18,446 Sometimes I just feel like our dynamic is special, 142 00:06:18,548 --> 00:06:19,914 and we should capture it. 143 00:06:20,016 --> 00:06:21,849 I feel like people would really relate to it. 144 00:06:21,951 --> 00:06:23,250 (thrumming) 145 00:06:23,352 --> 00:06:25,085 Oh, I think I brought my vibrator. 146 00:06:25,188 --> 00:06:28,355 Dude, maybe I am changing. 147 00:06:28,458 --> 00:06:30,224 Maybe it's just your phone. 148 00:06:30,326 --> 00:06:31,926 Oh. 149 00:06:32,028 --> 00:06:33,027 (bleep)! 150 00:06:33,129 --> 00:06:34,728 Shit, Dara needs me tonight! 151 00:06:34,831 --> 00:06:36,530 But it's the weekend! 152 00:06:36,632 --> 00:06:37,898 I know! 153 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:39,700 Okay, she wrote, 154 00:06:39,802 --> 00:06:41,602 "Abbi, I'm so sorry to ask you this, 155 00:06:41,704 --> 00:06:44,038 "but I need you to pick up 100 macarons 156 00:06:44,140 --> 00:06:45,573 "for my wife's birthday 157 00:06:45,675 --> 00:06:46,882 and bring them to my house in the next hour." 158 00:06:46,984 --> 00:06:48,609 What? 159 00:06:48,711 --> 00:06:51,212 Have I been talking for a long time? 160 00:06:51,314 --> 00:06:52,521 No, just, like, a second. 161 00:06:52,615 --> 00:06:54,223 Just finish the text! 162 00:06:54,325 --> 00:06:56,116 "So, I know it's the weekend..." 163 00:06:56,227 --> 00:06:59,220 but I really need this stupid, inedible dessert. 164 00:06:59,322 --> 00:07:00,963 She's French. 165 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:04,934 - Reality... - Penetrating... 166 00:07:05,036 --> 00:07:06,769 Hold my hand! 167 00:07:06,871 --> 00:07:08,103 Ahh! 168 00:07:08,206 --> 00:07:11,057 (both screaming) 169 00:07:11,437 --> 00:07:13,504 (tongues slurping) 170 00:07:13,606 --> 00:07:15,873 (Abbi) Thank God we have these lollipops. 171 00:07:15,975 --> 00:07:17,508 Okay, okay, You know what? 172 00:07:17,610 --> 00:07:19,643 It's okay. We're okay. 173 00:07:19,745 --> 00:07:21,712 We're fine, totally calm 174 00:07:21,814 --> 00:07:23,347 and cool as cucumbers. 175 00:07:23,449 --> 00:07:25,049 This doesn't have to totally change our day. 176 00:07:25,151 --> 00:07:26,350 No, no, it doesn't. 177 00:07:26,452 --> 00:07:29,086 Macarons are very colorful and vibrant, 178 00:07:29,188 --> 00:07:31,288 - and that is good. - Yeah, they are. 179 00:07:31,390 --> 00:07:33,991 I mean, I don't actually like them, like, flavorwise. 180 00:07:34,093 --> 00:07:35,417 - No. - But we'll just go 181 00:07:35,418 --> 00:07:36,827 and get a hundred macarons... (sighing) 182 00:07:36,862 --> 00:07:39,997 sneak into Dara's house, so her wife doesn't find out that this was an afterthought. 183 00:07:40,032 --> 00:07:41,699 Easy, so easy... 184 00:07:41,801 --> 00:07:43,200 - Mm-hmm. - And not stressful. 185 00:07:43,302 --> 00:07:46,737 Mm-hmm, we are on a legit secret mission for love, 186 00:07:46,839 --> 00:07:49,073 and that, my friend, is cool. 187 00:07:49,175 --> 00:07:50,808 Good call. 188 00:07:50,910 --> 00:07:52,009 That is cool. 189 00:07:52,111 --> 00:07:53,577 - Mmm. - Totally cool. 190 00:07:55,014 --> 00:07:58,282 Isn't it nuts that pickles were cucumbers? 191 00:07:58,384 --> 00:08:01,185 They're the trans people of the vegetable community. 192 00:08:04,056 --> 00:08:07,858 ?? (distorted accordion) 193 00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:09,660 (both) Wow... 194 00:08:12,198 --> 00:08:15,799 Oh, my God, it's beautiful. 195 00:08:15,901 --> 00:08:16,834 The colors... 196 00:08:16,936 --> 00:08:18,335 Macarons taste terrible, 197 00:08:18,437 --> 00:08:20,938 but God, are they pretty. 198 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:23,173 Whoa. Look at him. 199 00:08:24,510 --> 00:08:25,976 Bonjour, mademoiselle. 200 00:08:26,078 --> 00:08:28,779 Bienvenue a la Boutique de Macaron. 201 00:08:28,881 --> 00:08:31,181 (speaking French) 202 00:08:31,283 --> 00:08:33,350 Sorry, I only took French for seven years. 203 00:08:33,452 --> 00:08:34,852 I have no idea what you're saying. 204 00:08:34,954 --> 00:08:36,420 (chuckling) 205 00:08:36,522 --> 00:08:39,189 (speaking French) 206 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:43,427 I've never been to Paris. 207 00:08:43,529 --> 00:08:46,830 God, it really is so beautiful. 208 00:08:46,932 --> 00:08:49,767 But French people just want to make everything, like, fancy. 209 00:08:49,869 --> 00:08:51,602 Like, their fries. 210 00:08:51,704 --> 00:08:54,304 (French accent) It is like, we all love ze food. 211 00:08:54,407 --> 00:08:57,041 You are not special because you love ze food. 212 00:08:57,143 --> 00:08:59,309 Ilana, you know that being racist against white people 213 00:08:59,412 --> 00:09:01,111 is still being racist. 214 00:09:01,213 --> 00:09:02,613 Eh, I dunno. 215 00:09:02,715 --> 00:09:04,481 (tinny-voiced) Woohoo! Yay! 216 00:09:04,583 --> 00:09:06,917 Viva la resistance! 217 00:09:07,019 --> 00:09:11,055 Au revoir... (speaking French) 218 00:09:13,092 --> 00:09:15,459 (grunting) Merci beaucoup, monsieur. 219 00:09:15,561 --> 00:09:16,827 Au revoir! 220 00:09:16,929 --> 00:09:18,929 (subway tone) 221 00:09:24,470 --> 00:09:27,204 (whistling, booming) 222 00:09:32,078 --> 00:09:33,744 ?? 223 00:09:33,846 --> 00:09:35,546 Hey. Come on in, come on. 224 00:09:37,717 --> 00:09:39,550 Okay, let's set these bad boys up. 225 00:09:39,652 --> 00:09:42,519 Okay. All right. 226 00:09:42,621 --> 00:09:45,422 You are saving my ass, Abbi, I owe you one. 227 00:09:45,524 --> 00:09:47,491 There is no reason why I was not prepared 228 00:09:47,593 --> 00:09:50,494 to do this exact task on a day such as today. 229 00:09:50,596 --> 00:09:52,329 I should have known she was gonna want macarons 230 00:09:52,431 --> 00:09:53,697 and not carrot cake. 231 00:09:53,799 --> 00:09:55,432 And she's been hinting about it all week. 232 00:09:55,534 --> 00:09:57,534 I (bleep) hate hints. I never respond to 'em. 233 00:09:57,636 --> 00:09:59,002 Just say what you want. 234 00:09:59,105 --> 00:10:01,338 - Totally. - Hints are the worst. 235 00:10:01,440 --> 00:10:03,273 It's like, do you want to tell me the thing 236 00:10:03,375 --> 00:10:05,175 you're trying to tell me about? 237 00:10:05,277 --> 00:10:07,444 Please just tell me directly what you want, 238 00:10:07,546 --> 00:10:09,012 'cause then I'll do the thing. 239 00:10:09,115 --> 00:10:12,449 I'll do the damn thing, I just need a (bleep) clue. 240 00:10:14,553 --> 00:10:16,987 Thank you, thank you for helping out. 241 00:10:17,089 --> 00:10:19,389 And please stay. Eat, drink, mingle. 242 00:10:19,492 --> 00:10:21,625 I'm gonna get my girl. 243 00:10:21,727 --> 00:10:23,327 Okay. 244 00:10:23,429 --> 00:10:24,895 (wolf howling) 245 00:10:24,997 --> 00:10:26,897 (wolf whistle) 246 00:10:28,801 --> 00:10:30,167 Wow. 247 00:10:30,269 --> 00:10:33,203 (chuckling) 248 00:10:33,305 --> 00:10:35,205 So you're in town just for one more night. 249 00:10:35,307 --> 00:10:38,809 Yeah, with... Did you meet my partner? 250 00:10:38,911 --> 00:10:40,511 Dean? 251 00:10:41,614 --> 00:10:43,814 I have not. 252 00:10:43,916 --> 00:10:45,682 He looks smart. 253 00:10:45,785 --> 00:10:46,917 That's... That's what I'm getting. 254 00:10:47,019 --> 00:10:49,453 Well, we are always looking for someone 255 00:10:49,555 --> 00:10:50,654 to show us a good time. 256 00:10:50,756 --> 00:10:54,491 Do you mean, like... 257 00:10:54,593 --> 00:10:55,626 Yeah. 258 00:10:55,728 --> 00:10:57,995 (gasping) 259 00:11:03,402 --> 00:11:05,369 You really came through tonight, Ab. 260 00:11:05,471 --> 00:11:07,104 You know, I've been wanting to talk to you. 261 00:11:07,206 --> 00:11:11,241 I checked out your website recently, Abbilicious.com? 262 00:11:11,343 --> 00:11:13,477 Oh, that's old. That's from college. 263 00:11:13,579 --> 00:11:15,445 Really wonderful stuff. 264 00:11:15,548 --> 00:11:17,014 Funny, great sense of color. 265 00:11:17,116 --> 00:11:19,149 I was thinking we should get dinner. 266 00:11:19,251 --> 00:11:20,751 Yeah, maybe one night this week. 267 00:11:20,853 --> 00:11:23,020 Talk about your goals and you potentially 268 00:11:23,122 --> 00:11:24,893 taking on more creative assignments. 269 00:11:27,960 --> 00:11:29,359 That sound good? 270 00:11:31,063 --> 00:11:33,197 Yeah, that sounds... 271 00:11:33,299 --> 00:11:36,333 That sounds... I hear it. 272 00:11:36,435 --> 00:11:38,468 Check out my schedule and put it on the books. 273 00:11:38,571 --> 00:11:40,804 Okay, great. Sounds great. 274 00:11:41,974 --> 00:11:43,273 Yeah. 275 00:11:43,375 --> 00:11:45,242 Well, well, well... 276 00:11:45,344 --> 00:11:48,512 Looks like Abbi's night's turning around, huh? 277 00:11:48,614 --> 00:11:50,047 - Abbi! - (cat screeching) Hey. 278 00:11:50,149 --> 00:11:52,382 - Come with me. - All right. 279 00:11:54,053 --> 00:11:55,819 - Where are we going? - Jesus Christ. 280 00:11:55,921 --> 00:11:56,987 This is not a joke. 281 00:11:57,089 --> 00:11:58,422 (chuckling) 282 00:11:58,524 --> 00:12:00,657 (clearing throat) 283 00:12:00,759 --> 00:12:02,192 So, um, how are you feeling? 284 00:12:02,294 --> 00:12:05,529 Yeah, I'm feeling, definitely, like, a little bit different, right? 285 00:12:05,631 --> 00:12:07,064 - We're dropping, right? - Yeah. 286 00:12:07,166 --> 00:12:09,132 Our serotonin is, like, fully (bleep) depleted. 287 00:12:09,235 --> 00:12:10,534 - Yeah. - We're just gonna blaze 288 00:12:10,636 --> 00:12:12,536 - and boost ourselves right back up. - Okay. 289 00:12:12,638 --> 00:12:16,573 Dara wants to schedule a dinner with me, just us, 290 00:12:16,675 --> 00:12:20,043 to talk about me taking on more creative assignments. 291 00:12:20,145 --> 00:12:22,512 (inhaling) Creative assignments? 292 00:12:22,615 --> 00:12:24,548 - Yeah. - Yass, beesh! 293 00:12:24,650 --> 00:12:26,149 My body still feels, like, kinda weird right now, 294 00:12:26,252 --> 00:12:29,186 but I'm able to process that this is, like, really good. 295 00:12:29,622 --> 00:12:31,388 We are thriving. 296 00:12:33,392 --> 00:12:34,758 I'm about to (bleep) two of the hottest people 297 00:12:34,860 --> 00:12:36,360 I've ever seen, a couple. 298 00:12:36,462 --> 00:12:38,395 And the woman is older! 299 00:12:38,497 --> 00:12:40,631 (chuckling) 300 00:12:40,733 --> 00:12:42,967 And they wooed me. 301 00:12:43,069 --> 00:12:44,468 Wow. 302 00:12:44,570 --> 00:12:45,603 Ilana... 303 00:12:45,705 --> 00:12:47,571 Love is like... 304 00:12:47,673 --> 00:12:49,640 - It's like... sort of like... - It's like, it's... 305 00:12:49,742 --> 00:12:51,408 - No, it's just... yes! - Cool. 306 00:12:51,510 --> 00:12:54,812 And you are, like... zzhhh... 307 00:12:54,914 --> 00:12:56,647 And you, like, find it every time, 308 00:12:56,749 --> 00:12:59,016 it's like, I don't know how you do it. 309 00:12:59,118 --> 00:13:01,452 And we are just on this, like... 310 00:13:01,554 --> 00:13:03,621 (voice slowing) wild journey that we call life. 311 00:13:09,562 --> 00:13:12,997 I am feeling that weed. 312 00:13:13,099 --> 00:13:15,566 - Hmm... - On top of the... 313 00:13:15,668 --> 00:13:17,434 - (high-pitched) Yes. On top. - (high-pitched) It's feeling like... 314 00:13:17,536 --> 00:13:19,603 - I do feel it. - It is a cumulative experience. 315 00:13:19,705 --> 00:13:21,572 - (echoing) It's not nothing. - (echoing) Very much like 316 00:13:21,674 --> 00:13:23,674 - a pressurized part. - You know what? 317 00:13:23,776 --> 00:13:25,376 - I think we've had enough. - I feel like I had enough. 318 00:13:25,478 --> 00:13:26,543 - I had a bunch. - Cha-ching, see ya. 319 00:13:26,646 --> 00:13:28,579 And I'm just, um, gonna go 320 00:13:28,681 --> 00:13:32,116 have comfortable sex at this hot couple's hotel, 321 00:13:32,218 --> 00:13:36,220 and I'm really gonna miss you, and I love you so much. 322 00:13:36,322 --> 00:13:37,955 Ilana, I love you, too. 323 00:13:46,465 --> 00:13:48,899 (both chuckling) 324 00:13:51,537 --> 00:13:53,904 (both snorting) 325 00:13:54,006 --> 00:13:57,007 (both chuckling) 326 00:14:01,247 --> 00:14:03,414 Okay... I'm gonna go. 327 00:14:06,986 --> 00:14:10,854 ? Pussy pussy pussy puss pussy pussy pussy ? 328 00:14:10,956 --> 00:14:13,691 ?? 329 00:14:32,513 --> 00:14:34,579 I have a huge pussy... huge. 330 00:14:34,682 --> 00:14:37,115 Could fit you both, probably. 331 00:14:37,217 --> 00:14:40,986 Um, so should we set up some rules or guidelines 332 00:14:41,088 --> 00:14:43,588 or a safe word? 333 00:14:43,691 --> 00:14:49,027 Wow, wow, you guys are like hard-bodied Greek statues. 334 00:14:49,129 --> 00:14:53,231 I hope you're into a soft Russian peasant body. 335 00:14:53,334 --> 00:14:55,634 (chuckling) 336 00:14:57,371 --> 00:15:00,939 Wow, so stimulating. 337 00:15:02,710 --> 00:15:05,077 Really hot. Whew. 338 00:15:05,179 --> 00:15:07,679 Woo! Yowza. 339 00:15:07,781 --> 00:15:11,683 Holy Moly, wow, okay, cool abs. 340 00:15:11,785 --> 00:15:14,753 Penis perfect. Incredible tits. 341 00:15:14,855 --> 00:15:16,188 (man) It's like the Sahara down here. 342 00:15:16,290 --> 00:15:17,823 I must be so dehydrated 343 00:15:17,925 --> 00:15:21,660 from all the squirting and (bleep) I do. 344 00:15:21,762 --> 00:15:22,995 I'll... I'll B-R-B. 345 00:15:23,097 --> 00:15:24,529 I'll B-R-B. 346 00:15:26,734 --> 00:15:28,133 (adjusting dial) 347 00:15:28,235 --> 00:15:30,202 ?? (big band) 348 00:15:30,304 --> 00:15:31,436 (adjusting dial) 349 00:15:31,538 --> 00:15:33,872 ?? (pop song) 350 00:15:35,209 --> 00:15:36,174 ?? 351 00:15:36,276 --> 00:15:37,976 Okay. 352 00:15:38,078 --> 00:15:41,780 (meowing) 353 00:15:41,882 --> 00:15:44,316 (sighing) 354 00:15:47,955 --> 00:15:50,455 Okay, I'll let you out. 355 00:15:50,557 --> 00:15:52,657 (clearing throat) 356 00:15:52,760 --> 00:15:54,259 Go ahead. (mewling) 357 00:15:54,361 --> 00:15:56,061 Okay. (squish, meow) 358 00:15:56,163 --> 00:15:57,629 You know what? I just need a minute. 359 00:15:57,731 --> 00:15:59,664 Get it together, we'll go out to the party, 360 00:15:59,767 --> 00:16:02,000 and then we will be ourselves with this bunch of strangers. 361 00:16:02,102 --> 00:16:03,368 All right. 362 00:16:03,470 --> 00:16:05,070 This is good, I feel better. 363 00:16:05,172 --> 00:16:07,572 Oh. Okay. 364 00:16:09,977 --> 00:16:11,176 Oh, my God. 365 00:16:11,278 --> 00:16:12,277 Oh, no! 366 00:16:12,379 --> 00:16:13,879 No, no, no, no! 367 00:16:13,981 --> 00:16:15,747 Holy shit, holy shit. 368 00:16:17,684 --> 00:16:20,519 I'm brave, and I am super cool. 369 00:16:20,621 --> 00:16:21,987 Yeah, no shit! 370 00:16:22,089 --> 00:16:23,088 It's me. 371 00:16:23,190 --> 00:16:24,923 Ilana Rodham-Obama Wexler. 372 00:16:25,025 --> 00:16:26,558 Jew-nami! Woo! 373 00:16:26,660 --> 00:16:28,460 Vulvarine! Ow! 374 00:16:28,562 --> 00:16:30,228 Nikki Min-Ashkenazi! 375 00:16:30,330 --> 00:16:32,731 Uh! I'm free, and I'm wild, 376 00:16:32,833 --> 00:16:34,499 and I got big o'titties. 377 00:16:34,601 --> 00:16:37,035 Come on, kids. Aniston out. 378 00:16:37,137 --> 00:16:38,470 Come on, come on, here we go. 379 00:16:38,572 --> 00:16:40,138 Come on! 380 00:16:40,240 --> 00:16:42,474 Hey! Ilana. 381 00:16:42,576 --> 00:16:45,544 Proper oral hygiene stimulates more than just your gums. 382 00:16:47,581 --> 00:16:50,282 Woohoo! Ready to (bleep)! 383 00:16:51,418 --> 00:16:53,318 I want you to put that on. 384 00:16:53,420 --> 00:16:54,619 Tight. 385 00:16:57,925 --> 00:16:59,958 You guys picked it up in the village? 386 00:17:00,060 --> 00:17:03,762 I want you to enter Dean from behind 387 00:17:03,864 --> 00:17:05,997 while he (bleep) me out. 388 00:17:06,100 --> 00:17:08,533 Dope! Very cool. 389 00:17:08,635 --> 00:17:10,669 You guys are efficient. 390 00:17:10,771 --> 00:17:13,438 Okay, entering and (bleep) out. 391 00:17:13,540 --> 00:17:15,307 Great. 392 00:17:15,409 --> 00:17:17,976 It's weird you're seeing me in a random suitcase, 393 00:17:18,078 --> 00:17:19,544 but you still have my suitcase, 394 00:17:19,646 --> 00:17:21,313 and that's a visual reminder of me, 395 00:17:21,415 --> 00:17:23,715 so this train of mental hallucination makes sense. 396 00:17:23,817 --> 00:17:24,783 Totally makes sense. 397 00:17:24,885 --> 00:17:26,952 But back to business. 398 00:17:27,054 --> 00:17:29,321 Wow, Ilana. Pegasus. 399 00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:30,589 This is what you always wanted. 400 00:17:30,691 --> 00:17:32,491 This is your dream. Kudos! 401 00:17:33,794 --> 00:17:37,863 I have to, um, poop... hard. 402 00:17:43,437 --> 00:17:45,003 (meowing echoing) Okay. 403 00:17:45,105 --> 00:17:46,371 It's okay, okay. 404 00:17:46,473 --> 00:17:47,739 Oprah, Oprah. 405 00:17:47,841 --> 00:17:50,642 (screeching) Mark Ruffalo. 406 00:17:50,744 --> 00:17:52,410 Flutes, flutes, uh... 407 00:17:52,513 --> 00:17:54,045 Music is great. Music is great. 408 00:17:54,148 --> 00:17:55,881 (groaning) 409 00:17:55,983 --> 00:17:57,916 Pugs, pug puppies. Puppies. 410 00:17:58,018 --> 00:17:59,784 (meowing) (screaming) 411 00:17:59,887 --> 00:18:02,053 (cat screeching) 412 00:18:02,156 --> 00:18:03,755 Where is that coming from? 413 00:18:03,857 --> 00:18:05,290 (groaning) (cat screeching) 414 00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:09,227 (screeching) 415 00:18:10,164 --> 00:18:11,997 (groaning) 416 00:18:12,099 --> 00:18:15,433 Stupid, stupid! What is wrong with you? 417 00:18:15,536 --> 00:18:17,969 I can do this. I want this. 418 00:18:18,071 --> 00:18:19,638 I'm single! 419 00:18:20,807 --> 00:18:23,475 Who's ready to (bleep)? 420 00:18:23,577 --> 00:18:26,011 - What gives? - Ilana. 421 00:18:26,113 --> 00:18:27,779 What's going on? 422 00:18:27,881 --> 00:18:29,614 What's going on... 423 00:18:29,716 --> 00:18:33,752 is how hot and fun I am. 424 00:18:35,022 --> 00:18:36,888 See? Look at that. 425 00:18:36,990 --> 00:18:38,156 Yeah, yeah, yeah! 426 00:18:38,258 --> 00:18:41,059 Ow! Uh... ow. 427 00:18:46,733 --> 00:18:48,900 (knocking) 428 00:18:49,002 --> 00:18:50,535 (Dara) Hello? Dara? 429 00:18:50,637 --> 00:18:53,338 Oh, my God. Dara. 430 00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:54,706 Thank God, Dara. 431 00:18:54,808 --> 00:18:56,608 I've been locked in here for, like, hours. 432 00:18:56,710 --> 00:18:58,843 You just unlocked the door. 433 00:18:58,946 --> 00:19:00,679 What's going on? 434 00:19:00,781 --> 00:19:03,915 I'm tripping on mushrooms, and I'm having a bad trip. 435 00:19:04,017 --> 00:19:05,584 I thought you were acting kinda funny, 436 00:19:05,686 --> 00:19:08,386 but I called you on a weekend... that's my bad. 437 00:19:08,488 --> 00:19:10,488 Yeah, I didn't know... I wasn't ready to... 438 00:19:10,591 --> 00:19:12,524 - I would've not. - I get it. 439 00:19:12,626 --> 00:19:14,859 We've all had bad trips. (sighing) 440 00:19:14,962 --> 00:19:16,127 This too shall pass. 441 00:19:16,230 --> 00:19:17,529 Just try to say that with me. 442 00:19:17,631 --> 00:19:19,531 (both) This too shall pass. 443 00:19:19,633 --> 00:19:22,801 This too shall pass. 444 00:19:22,803 --> 00:19:24,236 Let's get some fresh air in here. 445 00:19:24,338 --> 00:19:25,570 Yeah, I didn't even think about that. 446 00:19:25,672 --> 00:19:27,305 Yeah, that'll make you feel better. 447 00:19:27,407 --> 00:19:29,741 Amanda? Amanda! 448 00:19:29,843 --> 00:19:31,590 Amanda asked to go outside, I just let her out! 449 00:19:31,625 --> 00:19:32,811 You killed my cat! 450 00:19:32,913 --> 00:19:34,779 What the (bleep)... You (bleep) monster? 451 00:19:34,881 --> 00:19:35,847 You killed Amanda! 452 00:19:35,949 --> 00:19:38,283 No, no! (woman screaming) 453 00:19:38,385 --> 00:19:40,485 - Okay, I would not... - She's smushed! 454 00:19:40,587 --> 00:19:41,620 This too shall pass, this too shall pass! 455 00:19:41,722 --> 00:19:43,788 This too shall not (bleep) pass! 456 00:19:43,890 --> 00:19:46,091 You're fired. Get the hell out of my house. 457 00:19:46,193 --> 00:19:47,892 - Wait, wait, wait, this is a... - Now! 458 00:19:47,995 --> 00:19:49,361 Okay, okay, yeah. 459 00:19:49,463 --> 00:19:51,196 (bleep) drug addict. 460 00:19:51,298 --> 00:19:54,508 - Oh, Amanda! - Okay, just let me... okay. 461 00:19:55,467 --> 00:19:57,433 (sniffing) 462 00:20:10,014 --> 00:20:11,714 Let's do this. 463 00:20:14,953 --> 00:20:16,386 Doesn't look that high. 464 00:20:16,488 --> 00:20:19,856 Guess they have to carb-load after their (bleep) hike. 465 00:20:19,958 --> 00:20:22,592 Ew. Ew. Ugh. Not into it. 466 00:20:24,129 --> 00:20:25,862 Dodged a (bleep) bullet. 467 00:20:25,964 --> 00:20:27,330 I wouldn't want that kind of intimacy. 468 00:20:27,432 --> 00:20:29,899 (clearing throat) (neck cracks) 469 00:20:30,001 --> 00:20:32,068 Cute. So cute. 470 00:20:32,170 --> 00:20:33,469 Goddammit. 471 00:20:33,571 --> 00:20:35,872 I love them. Oh, I hate them. 472 00:20:37,342 --> 00:20:40,843 (bleep)! (bleep)! (bleep)! (bleep)! 473 00:20:40,945 --> 00:20:43,079 ? Hey, li'l kid, what's poppin'? ? 474 00:20:43,181 --> 00:20:44,914 ? Hey, li'l kid, what's poppin'? ? 475 00:20:45,016 --> 00:20:47,650 ? No, we don't want no problem... ? 476 00:20:47,752 --> 00:20:49,118 (sniffing) 477 00:20:49,220 --> 00:20:51,454 (sighing) 478 00:20:51,556 --> 00:20:52,789 ? Hey, li'l kid, what's poppin'? ? 479 00:20:52,891 --> 00:20:54,557 Delete. Delete. 480 00:20:54,659 --> 00:20:56,793 Unsubscribe. Unsubscribe. 481 00:20:56,895 --> 00:20:58,328 Unfollow, unfollow, unfriend! 482 00:20:58,430 --> 00:20:59,812 (sniffing) 483 00:21:04,956 --> 00:21:06,496 (sighing) I feel better. 484 00:21:06,497 --> 00:21:08,531 Yeah, good job, dude. I'm proud of you. 485 00:21:09,787 --> 00:21:14,288 That was also the same sound the cat made as it died slowly. 486 00:21:15,199 --> 00:21:16,562 It's not your fault. 487 00:21:17,461 --> 00:21:18,921 Isn't it, though? 488 00:21:19,363 --> 00:21:20,510 Yes. 489 00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:25,110 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 32628

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