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1
00:00:07,333 --> 00:00:09,801
Let 'em say what they gonna say
2
00:00:10,356 --> 00:00:12,856
They gonna feel
how they gonna feel
3
00:00:12,942 --> 00:00:14,325
And I love it
4
00:00:14,410 --> 00:00:18,112
(whistling)
I love it Baby hey
5
00:00:18,197 --> 00:00:20,164
(flushing)
You should too
6
00:00:20,249 --> 00:00:22,516
(moaning)
So let 'em say
what they're gonna say
7
00:00:22,602 --> 00:00:23,820
My God...
8
00:00:23,821 --> 00:00:26,159
They're gonna feel
how they're gonna feel
9
00:00:26,194 --> 00:00:27,838
(flushing)
But I love it
10
00:00:27,923 --> 00:00:29,584
Yeah I love it
11
00:00:29,619 --> 00:00:31,592
And baby hey
12
00:00:31,711 --> 00:00:32,989
You should too
13
00:00:32,990 --> 00:00:33,829
Yeah, yeah.
14
00:00:33,982 --> 00:00:36,538
I'm just as thick as my skin is
15
00:00:36,573 --> 00:00:39,933
I feel the water
rolling down my back
16
00:00:40,052 --> 00:00:43,220
Precipitation's so repetitive
17
00:00:43,658 --> 00:00:46,454
-
I read this all before
- Hello?
18
00:00:46,489 --> 00:00:47,775
(crashing)
Move to the sound
19
00:00:47,893 --> 00:00:49,393
Swish all around
20
00:00:49,478 --> 00:00:52,896
A palate cleanser for
your salty mouth
(honking)
21
00:00:52,982 --> 00:00:54,898
(crackling)
I know
22
00:00:55,034 --> 00:00:56,784
They'll never get enough
23
00:00:56,902 --> 00:00:59,787
They don't get it
they don't get it
24
00:00:59,905 --> 00:01:01,655
But if you're giving it
25
00:01:01,741 --> 00:01:03,324
Then don't you change
26
00:01:03,409 --> 00:01:06,399
'Cause living was
the best revenge
27
00:01:06,434 --> 00:01:09,079
Let 'em say what they gonna say
28
00:01:09,414 --> 00:01:12,383
(farts)
They gonna
feel how they gonna feel
29
00:01:12,468 --> 00:01:14,648
-
And I love it
- What the (bleep), Bevers?
30
00:01:14,683 --> 00:01:16,637
-
I love it and baby
- I'm sorry.
31
00:01:16,756 --> 00:01:19,807
Hey you should to
(singing loudly)
32
00:01:19,925 --> 00:01:22,785
So let 'em say
what they wanna say
33
00:01:22,957 --> 00:01:25,578
They gonna feel
how they gonna feel
34
00:01:25,613 --> 00:01:27,293
(bubbling)
But I love it
35
00:01:27,328 --> 00:01:28,766
Yeah I love it
36
00:01:28,901 --> 00:01:30,984
And baby hey
37
00:01:31,103 --> 00:01:32,853
You should too
38
00:01:37,743 --> 00:01:39,526
You should too
39
00:01:39,612 --> 00:01:42,489
Four and three
and two and one-one
40
00:01:42,524 --> 00:01:43,694
41
00:01:43,695 --> 00:01:47,004
Sync and corrections by rickSG
www.addic7ed.com
42
00:01:47,166 --> 00:01:49,536
Abbo, party of two.
43
00:01:49,622 --> 00:01:51,622
Abbo.
44
00:01:51,757 --> 00:01:54,625
Oh, sorry. Do you mean "Abbi?"
45
00:01:54,710 --> 00:01:58,212
Your table's almost ready. But we can't
seat you unless you're all together.
46
00:01:58,297 --> 00:02:00,631
Unless you're here just by yourself.
47
00:02:00,716 --> 00:02:01,424
Aww.
48
00:02:01,568 --> 00:02:03,511
No, see? She's real.
49
00:02:03,602 --> 00:02:05,450
'Kay, I'll be right... Hey, dude.
50
00:02:05,603 --> 00:02:09,807
Hey, I'm sorry I was late. I got
into this depressing article matrix
51
00:02:09,892 --> 00:02:12,721
about these Saudi women who
have to ask their "keepers"
52
00:02:12,756 --> 00:02:14,547
permission to leave the house.
53
00:02:14,582 --> 00:02:15,696
Like, please.
54
00:02:15,815 --> 00:02:19,651
I just was so pissed, I had to blow
off some steam and masturbate first.
55
00:02:19,686 --> 00:02:22,069
Uh... Cool... Listen, we gotta
hurry up. We're gonna lose the table.
56
00:02:22,154 --> 00:02:23,524
- I've been waiting.
- Really sorry,
57
00:02:23,559 --> 00:02:25,956
you just would not have wanted to see
me if I hadn't masturbated. (keys clang)
58
00:02:26,041 --> 00:02:28,370
- Oh... no
- Oh... no!
59
00:02:28,405 --> 00:02:30,043
- (Abbi) Oh, no! You see it?
- (bleep)
60
00:02:30,162 --> 00:02:32,112
- I see it. It's right there.
- I want to jump in there.
61
00:02:32,147 --> 00:02:34,094
There's no... It's so deep.
62
00:02:34,285 --> 00:02:35,132
Ew!
63
00:02:35,217 --> 00:02:37,131
There's no way you're
gonna reach the bottom.
64
00:02:37,166 --> 00:02:38,502
(gagging)
65
00:02:38,587 --> 00:02:41,088
(host) Abbo!
66
00:02:41,173 --> 00:02:43,120
You want the table or not?
67
00:02:43,155 --> 00:02:45,008
Okay, we gotta go back
to these Saudi women.
68
00:02:45,094 --> 00:02:46,593
Dude, I can't even believe it.
69
00:02:46,679 --> 00:02:48,679
They need written permission
from their male guardians...
70
00:02:48,764 --> 00:02:51,482
That's what they call their husbands,
to let them go outside of their house.
71
00:02:51,567 --> 00:02:53,350
Like, they're trapped unless
they get written permission.
72
00:02:53,436 --> 00:02:55,068
- So (bleep) up.
- People don't know about this.
73
00:02:55,187 --> 00:02:57,771
They need to wake up to
the injustices of the world.
74
00:02:57,857 --> 00:02:58,602
Ugh!
75
00:02:58,642 --> 00:03:00,553
The bottomless mimosas
aren't on the menu anymore.
76
00:03:00,575 --> 00:03:02,025
- Are you kidding me?
- No, they're nowhere.
77
00:03:02,111 --> 00:03:04,027
- There was no sign. This is so unfair!
- God.
78
00:03:04,113 --> 00:03:05,863
- Sorry, we did not order sparkling water.
- No!
79
00:03:05,948 --> 00:03:07,080
It's complimentary.
80
00:03:07,199 --> 00:03:08,749
We'll have two more bottles, please.
81
00:03:08,868 --> 00:03:09,750
Thanks so much.
82
00:03:09,869 --> 00:03:12,202
(woman speaking Italian)
83
00:03:13,457 --> 00:03:15,885
New York is Europe. I love it.
84
00:03:15,920 --> 00:03:17,534
Every time I walk down
the street, I'm like...
85
00:03:17,569 --> 00:03:19,877
(imitating Italian)
86
00:03:19,812 --> 00:03:20,961
Do German.
87
00:03:21,046 --> 00:03:22,514
Loch! Ach!
88
00:03:22,653 --> 00:03:23,847
Australian.
89
00:03:23,933 --> 00:03:24,897
Oyuh!
90
00:03:24,932 --> 00:03:26,099
Spanish.
91
00:03:26,218 --> 00:03:27,267
(imitating Spanish)
92
00:03:27,386 --> 00:03:29,052
Do Chinese.
93
00:03:29,188 --> 00:03:30,304
Are you kidding?
94
00:03:30,901 --> 00:03:31,855
No.
95
00:03:32,160 --> 00:03:35,392
- It's 2016, dude.
- No. That's my bad, I'm sorry.
96
00:03:35,528 --> 00:03:37,895
Anyway, so about tonight,
I want to get into the plan.
97
00:03:38,030 --> 00:03:39,577
- What's tonight?
- I told you last night.
98
00:03:39,612 --> 00:03:41,899
The gallery opening. My
roommate from college?
99
00:03:42,034 --> 00:03:43,951
Smelly pussy Donna?
100
00:03:44,069 --> 00:03:45,903
No, and I'm still sorry
that I told you that.
101
00:03:46,038 --> 00:03:49,239
No, my other roommate Max Anne. She
got her first painting in a gallery,
102
00:03:49,325 --> 00:03:52,910
she's been working forever,
and I read in TONY...
103
00:03:52,995 --> 00:03:53,877
(haughty chuckling)
104
00:03:53,963 --> 00:03:55,128
- Time Out New York.
- Love it.
105
00:03:55,247 --> 00:03:57,130
That the warehouse sale is this weekend
106
00:03:57,249 --> 00:03:58,715
and I need to find
something cool to wear.
107
00:03:58,801 --> 00:03:59,833
No, you don't.
108
00:03:59,919 --> 00:04:02,881
You look sexy and vivacious and artsy
109
00:04:02,916 --> 00:04:06,476
and like, young wife material,
but, like, taut, and teasy still.
110
00:04:06,511 --> 00:04:07,841
It's a perfect combo.
111
00:04:08,023 --> 00:04:10,978
I mean, it's okay. It's, like, urban.
112
00:04:11,096 --> 00:04:13,597
- Like Urban Outfitters.
- Got it.
113
00:04:13,682 --> 00:04:15,098
Thank you.
114
00:04:15,184 --> 00:04:17,100
To my frond... To the ond.
115
00:04:17,236 --> 00:04:18,602
And to free sparkling water.
116
00:04:18,687 --> 00:04:20,084
(tapping)
117
00:04:21,907 --> 00:04:24,491
Mmm... That's classy.
118
00:04:24,610 --> 00:04:25,745
(belching) Very.
119
00:04:26,465 --> 00:04:28,245
Dude, just trust me. Chill.
120
00:04:28,330 --> 00:04:30,664
- Come on.
- Gum is so repulsive.
121
00:04:30,783 --> 00:04:32,082
It is cow cud.
122
00:04:32,167 --> 00:04:34,701
You want the key back or not?
123
00:04:34,787 --> 00:04:35,786
Trust me.
124
00:04:35,871 --> 00:04:38,288
Here we go. Oh!
125
00:04:38,424 --> 00:04:40,507
Ugh! Ugh!
126
00:04:42,812 --> 00:04:44,343
Here we go.
127
00:04:44,378 --> 00:04:47,431
Oh, my God. Genie!
128
00:04:47,516 --> 00:04:48,932
You are a genius.
129
00:04:49,068 --> 00:04:50,984
This is Depression-era
(bleep) right here.
130
00:04:51,103 --> 00:04:52,603
- There it is.
- You see it? You're so close.
131
00:04:52,688 --> 00:04:54,592
- Okay, do you see?
- Yo, we got this.
132
00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:55,856
- It's right there.
- A little lower.
133
00:04:55,941 --> 00:04:57,357
- It's so close.
- Maybe like north...
134
00:04:57,370 --> 00:04:59,942
Ow! Oh (bleep)! (metal screeching)
(both screaming) (tearing)
135
00:04:59,977 --> 00:05:01,030
Get off of me!
136
00:05:01,065 --> 00:05:02,579
- Get up!
- Oh, my God!
137
00:05:02,665 --> 00:05:03,530
- I got you!
- Dude!
138
00:05:03,616 --> 00:05:05,032
- What the (bleep)?
- What was that?
139
00:05:05,117 --> 00:05:06,450
What the (bleep) was that?
140
00:05:06,535 --> 00:05:08,235
- Was that a train?
- I don't know. I can't go like this.
141
00:05:08,389 --> 00:05:10,003
Well, now you have an
excuse to buy something.
142
00:05:10,122 --> 00:05:13,678
Honestly, that's the best way to
shop, desperate and in a time crunch.
143
00:05:13,713 --> 00:05:14,925
Well, what about the key?
144
00:05:15,010 --> 00:05:16,343
I'll figure it out.
145
00:05:16,462 --> 00:05:19,337
You know, having this 12-pound
chain around my waist for a few hours
146
00:05:19,372 --> 00:05:21,849
is nothing compared to
the metaphysical chains
147
00:05:21,967 --> 00:05:24,292
of those Saudi women
and their "keepers."
148
00:05:24,327 --> 00:05:26,902
Totally. All right, well, let's pee
first, you know, just to be safe.
149
00:05:26,937 --> 00:05:28,387
Oof, smart and sexy.
150
00:05:28,422 --> 00:05:30,402
She is unreal, this girl.
151
00:05:30,976 --> 00:05:33,394
(man) She really is. (loud chewing)
152
00:05:33,479 --> 00:05:35,946
Sorry, we don't have
any tables available.
153
00:05:36,031 --> 00:05:39,366
The next available table
is in about an hour.
154
00:05:39,485 --> 00:05:40,984
Oh, no, we're actually
just gonna use the bathroom.
155
00:05:41,120 --> 00:05:42,953
The bathroom is for customers only.
156
00:05:43,038 --> 00:05:44,955
We're customers. We just had brunch.
157
00:05:45,040 --> 00:05:47,207
So if you came here two months ago,
158
00:05:47,326 --> 00:05:49,493
that just makes you entitled to
piss here whenever you'd like?
159
00:05:49,578 --> 00:05:52,830
The next table is available
in an hour and 45 minutes.
160
00:05:52,915 --> 00:05:55,331
- You just said it was in an hour.
- Caught you, pretty girl.
161
00:05:55,366 --> 00:05:56,967
And even if it wasn't an hour,
162
00:05:57,052 --> 00:06:00,170
we will never be patrons
at this place ever again.
163
00:06:00,256 --> 00:06:04,508
Unless we're planning a birthday, because
the garden is perfect for large parties.
164
00:06:04,643 --> 00:06:06,143
- Yeah.
- All right.
165
00:06:06,228 --> 00:06:07,895
Have a great day, Abbo.
166
00:06:08,013 --> 00:06:10,180
167
00:06:12,132 --> 00:06:14,488
_
168
00:06:16,856 --> 00:06:21,909
Perfect.
169
00:06:22,027 --> 00:06:24,995
(angry chatter and distant shouting)
170
00:06:30,002 --> 00:06:31,285
(screaming)
171
00:06:32,371 --> 00:06:33,537
(grunting)
172
00:06:33,672 --> 00:06:35,456
- (woman) Give it!
- (man) Take it easy.
173
00:06:35,541 --> 00:06:37,040
Excuse me, where's the bathroom?
174
00:06:37,126 --> 00:06:38,709
We don't have bathrooms.
175
00:06:38,844 --> 00:06:40,010
We don't even have dressing rooms.
176
00:06:40,095 --> 00:06:41,879
This is a pop-up, bitch!
177
00:06:42,014 --> 00:06:45,215
(yowling) Oh, no!
178
00:06:45,351 --> 00:06:46,467
(weeping)
179
00:06:55,094 --> 00:06:56,522
Does this look artsy to you?
180
00:06:56,557 --> 00:06:57,728
I have a girlfriend.
181
00:06:57,863 --> 00:06:59,363
Yeah, well, so do I.
182
00:06:59,448 --> 00:07:02,566
She's right here, with the ugly hat on.
183
00:07:02,701 --> 00:07:04,485
Oh.
184
00:07:04,570 --> 00:07:05,786
(scoffs)
185
00:07:05,905 --> 00:07:08,071
Hey, do you love this hat?
186
00:07:08,248 --> 00:07:10,429
- Forget it, it's gone. Forget it.
- Okay.
187
00:07:10,464 --> 00:07:12,910
Is this perfect for tonight or what?
188
00:07:12,995 --> 00:07:15,712
Very much, yes.
189
00:07:15,798 --> 00:07:19,583
No doubt, though, by the quality some
nine-year-old girl was forced to work,
190
00:07:19,718 --> 00:07:22,397
day-in and day-out, she's
breathing in the fumes, you know,
191
00:07:22,432 --> 00:07:25,005
her little fingers perfect for sewing,
but also perfect for getting stuck
192
00:07:25,090 --> 00:07:26,532
in that sewing machine.
193
00:07:26,697 --> 00:07:28,008
It's 90% off.
194
00:07:28,093 --> 00:07:30,293
You know, if you don't buy
it, what was all of that for?
195
00:07:30,328 --> 00:07:31,011
All right, cool.
196
00:07:31,096 --> 00:07:32,337
- Yeah.
- Great.
197
00:07:32,437 --> 00:07:33,597
Mine!
198
00:07:33,682 --> 00:07:34,765
That's my old shirt.
199
00:07:34,850 --> 00:07:37,434
Yeah, sure it is, bitch.
200
00:07:37,520 --> 00:07:39,686
- What?
- I don't like the energy here.
201
00:07:39,772 --> 00:07:41,177
Jeez.
202
00:07:42,441 --> 00:07:45,275
Man, someone was just telling
me about this crazy article.
203
00:07:45,361 --> 00:07:47,444
- Yeah.
- By someone, I mean the Internet.
204
00:07:47,580 --> 00:07:50,781
Oh, my God. They forgot to
take the security tag off.
205
00:07:50,866 --> 00:07:51,679
(bleep)
206
00:07:51,771 --> 00:07:53,383
Come on!
207
00:07:53,418 --> 00:07:55,283
Fine, we have to go back, dude.
208
00:07:55,351 --> 00:07:57,037
Why does this (bleep) always
happen to me? It's like...
209
00:07:57,122 --> 00:07:58,430
I don't know.
210
00:07:58,465 --> 00:08:00,510
My therapist doesn't know either.
211
00:08:06,049 --> 00:08:08,966
What the (bleep)?
212
00:08:09,051 --> 00:08:11,885
My therapist is gonna love this one.
213
00:08:11,971 --> 00:08:13,221
Jeez.
214
00:08:14,153 --> 00:08:16,069
(Ilana) Oh, God, I gotta go so bad.
215
00:08:16,155 --> 00:08:18,071
- (Abbi) Yeah, me too.
- You know what? I'm just gonna pee here.
216
00:08:18,157 --> 00:08:20,278
I can't wait anymore.
217
00:08:21,743 --> 00:08:22,993
(rattling)
218
00:08:25,247 --> 00:08:26,997
(clearing throat)
219
00:08:28,282 --> 00:08:30,351
Hi. How you doing?
220
00:08:30,919 --> 00:08:33,883
Squats... Um, unlock the hips.
221
00:08:36,008 --> 00:08:37,474
- See that?
- Yeah.
222
00:08:37,593 --> 00:08:40,477
God, cops scare the (bleep)
out of me, and I'm white.
223
00:08:40,596 --> 00:08:42,596
(cell phone vibrating)
224
00:08:42,681 --> 00:08:43,980
Oh, it's Lincoln.
225
00:08:44,099 --> 00:08:45,961
You take it. I'm gonna go into the
store and see if they can take this off.
226
00:08:45,962 --> 00:08:46,959
Cool.
227
00:08:46,994 --> 00:08:48,485
- Hey, bwa.
- (Lincoln) Hey, grah.
228
00:08:48,604 --> 00:08:49,436
You coming?
229
00:08:49,521 --> 00:08:50,399
Not yet.
230
00:08:50,434 --> 00:08:51,655
Say something filthy.
231
00:08:51,773 --> 00:08:54,196
Ilana, did you forget
my graduation is today?
232
00:08:55,444 --> 00:08:56,409
No.
233
00:08:56,608 --> 00:08:59,362
Na... We're close, on our... very way.
234
00:08:59,575 --> 00:09:01,319
- All right.
- Cool, see you soon. Bye.
235
00:09:01,354 --> 00:09:04,084
(alarm ringing)
236
00:09:04,169 --> 00:09:05,118
- Hey.
- How'd it go?
237
00:09:05,204 --> 00:09:06,501
Yeah, uh, pretty good.
238
00:09:06,536 --> 00:09:08,325
Also, they think I stole
this, the cops are coming.
239
00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:10,173
Alright, got it.
240
00:09:10,292 --> 00:09:11,458
- Okay.
- All right.
241
00:09:11,593 --> 00:09:13,593
And I am boarding.
242
00:09:13,679 --> 00:09:15,962
- Okay, and I am...
- Wait, wait, wait.
243
00:09:16,098 --> 00:09:16,963
- Boarding.
- Boarding.
244
00:09:16,999 --> 00:09:18,606
- I'm aboard.
- Aboard.
245
00:09:18,967 --> 00:09:21,801
A few steps, a few steps,
and then we start a pedal.
246
00:09:21,937 --> 00:09:25,805
One second. Few steps, and
then we start a'pedaling.
247
00:09:25,941 --> 00:09:29,809
Dassit.
248
00:09:29,945 --> 00:09:31,945
Oh, this is really nice.
249
00:09:32,030 --> 00:09:33,113
(car horn honking) Oh...
250
00:09:33,198 --> 00:09:35,031
(both) (bleep) you!
251
00:09:35,150 --> 00:09:37,400
252
00:09:38,654 --> 00:09:40,871
First, tape the back of the tag,
253
00:09:40,989 --> 00:09:42,539
where the ink cartridge is located.
254
00:09:42,658 --> 00:09:45,088
You don't want it exploding
and ruining your new clothes.
255
00:09:45,123 --> 00:09:48,295
Next, you're gonna want a
hacksaw. A hammer. A vice.
256
00:09:48,380 --> 00:09:49,663
Some heavy duty pliers.
257
00:09:49,748 --> 00:09:50,830
Well, I don't have a vice.
258
00:09:50,966 --> 00:09:51,915
I don't have any of that stuff.
259
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:53,633
Oh, he's up.
260
00:09:53,719 --> 00:09:54,968
(Abbi) Yeah, Lincoln!
261
00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:55,631
Woo!
262
00:09:55,757 --> 00:09:57,088
- (Ilana) Hey, Lincoln!
- Hey!
263
00:09:57,123 --> 00:09:59,089
(cheering)
264
00:09:59,174 --> 00:10:01,191
- Looking good!
- I'm about to do it!
265
00:10:01,226 --> 00:10:02,426
Circus, babe!
266
00:10:02,461 --> 00:10:04,315
Just be careful, though!
267
00:10:05,564 --> 00:10:07,264
(Abbi) Oh!
268
00:10:07,349 --> 00:10:08,431
Ooh!
269
00:10:08,517 --> 00:10:11,234
Whoa!
270
00:10:11,353 --> 00:10:13,436
(ropes creaking)
271
00:10:16,191 --> 00:10:17,073
(Ilana) Woo!
272
00:10:17,192 --> 00:10:18,575
Oh!
273
00:10:18,694 --> 00:10:21,278
(both cheering)
274
00:10:21,363 --> 00:10:22,612
Yes!
275
00:10:22,698 --> 00:10:25,916
(both) Yes!
276
00:10:26,034 --> 00:10:26,750
(laughing confidently)
277
00:10:27,163 --> 00:10:28,835
- Amazing.
- You saw me?
278
00:10:28,921 --> 00:10:32,038
- I was flying, you guys... Oh!
- Oh, my God. That was awesome.
279
00:10:32,883 --> 00:10:35,542
But, uh, why are you-you doing this?
280
00:10:35,627 --> 00:10:37,294
I saw it on an episode
of "Sex & the City."
281
00:10:37,379 --> 00:10:38,416
Yes!
282
00:10:38,455 --> 00:10:41,106
The Miranda in me thought,
I'm out of my comfort zone,
283
00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:43,883
but the Carrie in me
couldn't resist, so I did it.
284
00:10:43,918 --> 00:10:47,218
(Abbi) You know what? I'm really
a Miranda-Carrie, too, I think.
285
00:10:47,253 --> 00:10:47,845
Yeah?
286
00:10:47,880 --> 00:10:51,057
With, like, a little bit of Charlotte,
even though she really annoys me.
287
00:10:51,193 --> 00:10:52,924
- Yeah, me too.
- Who am I?
288
00:10:52,995 --> 00:10:56,007
Honey, I have a cyst on my uterus
289
00:10:56,042 --> 00:10:59,149
and I need to get (bleep) until it pops.
290
00:10:59,234 --> 00:11:00,567
Samantha Jones.
291
00:11:00,652 --> 00:11:03,286
Sometimes I'm happy about it and
then other times I'm like, it's gross.
292
00:11:03,405 --> 00:11:05,472
Uh... what's up with that chain?
293
00:11:06,408 --> 00:11:07,874
I lost the key.
294
00:11:07,960 --> 00:11:11,378
Ilana! Phone, keys, wallet. P-K-W.
295
00:11:11,463 --> 00:11:13,463
I know. I repeat it all the time.
296
00:11:13,582 --> 00:11:15,978
- I just dropped it in a sewer, okay?
- A sewer.
297
00:11:16,116 --> 00:11:19,822
You also look like a DMX
video extra, I might add.
298
00:11:21,223 --> 00:11:22,589
Thank you.
299
00:11:22,674 --> 00:11:25,936
Well, me and the other swingers...
300
00:11:27,512 --> 00:11:29,327
- Get it? Swingers?
- Yeah, we got it.
301
00:11:29,358 --> 00:11:33,767
We have a dinner reservation
at KOI, but I'll totally bail
302
00:11:33,852 --> 00:11:35,960
if you need some help
with that goofy-ass chain.
303
00:11:36,860 --> 00:11:41,362
You know, as a woman, I feel it's
important to cast this chain off myself.
304
00:11:41,397 --> 00:11:42,993
I respect your choices.
305
00:11:43,111 --> 00:11:45,695
(cell phone vibrating)
306
00:11:45,781 --> 00:11:48,578
Yeah, Ma, I did it. It was great.
307
00:11:48,950 --> 00:11:50,157
Later, y'all.
308
00:11:50,192 --> 00:11:52,002
I gotta pee so bad, dude.
309
00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:53,620
Okay, me too.
310
00:11:53,705 --> 00:11:55,088
Got it?
311
00:11:55,173 --> 00:11:57,173
Oh, my bladder is quivering.
312
00:11:57,292 --> 00:11:59,709
313
00:12:01,363 --> 00:12:04,781
Do you know Steve Jobs
stunk and cried all the time?
314
00:12:04,866 --> 00:12:05,999
I did not.
315
00:12:06,084 --> 00:12:07,200
Ilana, look!
316
00:12:07,336 --> 00:12:08,868
(Ilana) Ugh, men working.
317
00:12:08,954 --> 00:12:10,670
A woman-free zone.
318
00:12:10,756 --> 00:12:13,506
Just another sign, literally,
of women's oppression.
319
00:12:13,592 --> 00:12:15,542
No, I'm talking about
the port-a-potty.
320
00:12:15,677 --> 00:12:17,412
Oh... smart.
321
00:12:17,447 --> 00:12:18,678
I'm gonna go first.
322
00:12:19,387 --> 00:12:20,830
I'll go second.
323
00:12:31,476 --> 00:12:34,778
(loud, steady splashing)
324
00:12:34,896 --> 00:12:36,294
Damn, bitch.
325
00:12:36,765 --> 00:12:37,843
Oof.
326
00:12:37,878 --> 00:12:41,034
Pelvic floor strength, Gaga.
327
00:12:41,119 --> 00:12:42,619
Bikinis, all of my bikinis.
328
00:12:42,738 --> 00:12:44,589
- (Abbi) Oh, no!
- Boquenas, boquenas.
329
00:12:44,689 --> 00:12:46,918
- Oh, my God!
- I don't know what boquenas are.
330
00:12:46,953 --> 00:12:48,325
Come on!
331
00:12:48,744 --> 00:12:50,377
Ilana!
332
00:12:50,462 --> 00:12:51,411
Abbi!
333
00:12:51,496 --> 00:12:54,497
I am in the potty!
334
00:12:54,583 --> 00:12:56,800
There's someone in the potty!
335
00:12:56,918 --> 00:12:58,404
Hey! Oh!
336
00:12:58,439 --> 00:12:59,919
(bleep)
337
00:13:00,055 --> 00:13:00,804
(shrieking)
338
00:13:01,850 --> 00:13:03,351
This is how I die.
339
00:13:03,386 --> 00:13:04,467
This is it.
340
00:13:04,502 --> 00:13:05,759
It's coming down!
341
00:13:05,844 --> 00:13:07,927
It's coming down! It's coming down!
342
00:13:08,013 --> 00:13:09,263
Hey! It's down, it's down!
343
00:13:09,298 --> 00:13:10,481
You're on the ground!
344
00:13:10,516 --> 00:13:11,931
Oh (bleep)! (splashing)
345
00:13:12,017 --> 00:13:14,261
(Ilana) It's down! It's
down, come on, come on!
346
00:13:14,296 --> 00:13:16,133
Hey, you're down! You're back!
347
00:13:16,326 --> 00:13:18,730
- Get out! Oh (bleep).
- Oh, my God. (bleep)
348
00:13:18,765 --> 00:13:20,323
- Oh, Jesus.
- Okay, okay.
349
00:13:20,342 --> 00:13:21,401
- You got it.
- Okay.
350
00:13:21,402 --> 00:13:22,723
All right. Watch out.
351
00:13:23,111 --> 00:13:24,110
Oh, my God.
352
00:13:24,196 --> 00:13:26,780
Oh! What the...
353
00:13:27,386 --> 00:13:28,741
You went up and over.
354
00:13:28,776 --> 00:13:30,190
That was insane.
355
00:13:30,285 --> 00:13:32,335
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my gosh.
356
00:13:32,454 --> 00:13:35,955
- Oh, my God. What the (bleep)?
- That was crazy.
357
00:13:36,091 --> 00:13:38,625
I... I don't even...
358
00:13:38,760 --> 00:13:39,959
(laughing)
359
00:13:40,045 --> 00:13:44,279
Dude, I almost, like, just got taken,
to, like, a factory for port-a-potties.
360
00:13:44,379 --> 00:13:46,335
That was the scariest thing
I've ever seen. (truck starting)
361
00:13:46,481 --> 00:13:47,801
Oh, shoot, get off.
362
00:13:47,802 --> 00:13:49,969
- My God, I can't.
- Ilana, wait, dude, get off.
363
00:13:50,055 --> 00:13:51,209
- I... I'm stuck, dude!
- Come on!
364
00:13:51,244 --> 00:13:52,957
- The chain is stuck!
- Ilana!
365
00:13:52,992 --> 00:13:54,140
Oh, my God!
366
00:13:54,226 --> 00:13:55,832
Oh, my God!
367
00:13:55,867 --> 00:13:57,277
- Ilana!
- Abbi!
368
00:13:57,362 --> 00:14:00,041
- I mean, Ilana!
- Abbi!
369
00:14:03,310 --> 00:14:06,211
370
00:14:06,296 --> 00:14:07,963
Abbi!
371
00:14:11,185 --> 00:14:12,985
Ilana!
372
00:14:13,070 --> 00:14:14,736
(Ilana) Oh! Ilana, I got you!
373
00:14:14,855 --> 00:14:15,988
I'm coming! (bleep)
374
00:14:16,073 --> 00:14:17,712
- I got it!
- I'm gonna die!
375
00:14:18,075 --> 00:14:18,941
I'm (bleep) dead!
376
00:14:19,026 --> 00:14:20,025
Hold on, just hold on!
377
00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:21,777
No, you gotta... Come on!
378
00:14:21,862 --> 00:14:23,362
Hey! Hey!
379
00:14:24,865 --> 00:14:25,914
What?
380
00:14:26,033 --> 00:14:28,596
My friend is stuck on
the back of your truck.
381
00:14:28,631 --> 00:14:29,835
(quiet moaning)
382
00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:32,037
Also, what, are you watching
porn while you drive?
383
00:14:32,122 --> 00:14:33,672
Oh, don't judge me.
384
00:14:33,757 --> 00:14:35,707
You're the one wearing the stolen shirt.
385
00:14:35,793 --> 00:14:37,493
Okay, it's not stolen.
386
00:14:37,494 --> 00:14:40,293
I'm letting her out. Why don't
you just finish? If you can.
387
00:14:41,949 --> 00:14:44,223
- Nice ass!
- Yeah, I know!
388
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:47,834
- Hey. Are you okay?
- Oh, my God.
389
00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:49,874
- Oh, my God...
- Let me get you off of this.
390
00:14:50,605 --> 00:14:52,733
Okay, it's okay, okay, okay, okay.
391
00:14:52,768 --> 00:14:54,480
- Oh, God.
- Okay.
392
00:14:54,515 --> 00:14:56,543
Up, up. All right, it's okay.
393
00:14:56,628 --> 00:14:57,924
Let's get married.
394
00:14:57,959 --> 00:14:59,463
What was that?
395
00:14:59,831 --> 00:15:01,505
- What?
- What... You said something.
396
00:15:01,633 --> 00:15:03,700
- I didn't hear what you said.
- No, you said... You said something.
397
00:15:03,719 --> 00:15:04,968
No.
398
00:15:05,053 --> 00:15:06,436
- Okay. Thank you for...
- We have...
399
00:15:06,555 --> 00:15:07,721
Oh, my God, you saved me.
400
00:15:07,856 --> 00:15:10,357
Okay, we need to get this
off. This is insanity.
401
00:15:10,459 --> 00:15:11,818
You just got stuck to
the back of a truck.
402
00:15:11,853 --> 00:15:13,507
All right, well, why don't
you... Do you want to pee first?
403
00:15:13,612 --> 00:15:14,912
And we'll find a...
404
00:15:15,397 --> 00:15:16,530
I did.
405
00:15:18,450 --> 00:15:19,566
Okay.
406
00:15:19,651 --> 00:15:20,484
It's okay.
407
00:15:20,569 --> 00:15:22,010
It'll dry. It'll dry.
408
00:15:23,288 --> 00:15:24,404
It's sterile.
409
00:15:26,575 --> 00:15:28,959
Oh, Bike-el Jackson.
410
00:15:29,077 --> 00:15:31,244
No one took you.
411
00:15:31,330 --> 00:15:33,880
Ilana, it's getting really late.
412
00:15:33,966 --> 00:15:37,018
I mean, maybe we can go to Duane Reade and
get me, like, an undershirt or something?
413
00:15:37,053 --> 00:15:39,308
- Undershirt?
- I don't know if we should even go.
414
00:15:39,343 --> 00:15:40,387
Dude...
415
00:15:40,472 --> 00:15:42,722
Who cares about a stupid little tag?
416
00:15:42,808 --> 00:15:44,763
Artists aren't judged by what they wear.
417
00:15:44,798 --> 00:15:45,809
Look at Joss Stone.
418
00:15:45,928 --> 00:15:48,644
She's a genius and she's
never even worn shoes.
419
00:15:57,823 --> 00:15:59,272
- All right, I'm back in.
- I knew it.
420
00:15:59,408 --> 00:16:00,574
- Yeah.
- You rule.
421
00:16:00,659 --> 00:16:02,576
422
00:16:05,497 --> 00:16:06,780
(music playing)
423
00:16:06,915 --> 00:16:08,832
(Ilana) Whoa.
424
00:16:08,951 --> 00:16:11,618
- This is nuts. (Abbi)
- Yeah, this is legit.
425
00:16:11,703 --> 00:16:13,503
She did it, she did it.
426
00:16:16,675 --> 00:16:19,209
Damn. I could have done that.
427
00:16:19,294 --> 00:16:21,511
Chain belt.
428
00:16:21,630 --> 00:16:24,381
V. bold.
429
00:16:24,466 --> 00:16:25,932
Enchant?.
430
00:16:28,237 --> 00:16:29,469
(woman) Abbi!
431
00:16:29,605 --> 00:16:30,971
(laughing)
432
00:16:31,056 --> 00:16:32,639
(whispering) That's Max.
433
00:16:33,488 --> 00:16:35,187
- (Max) Hi!
- (Abbi) Hi!
434
00:16:35,222 --> 00:16:37,358
Oh, my God! I'm so glad you're here.
435
00:16:37,393 --> 00:16:39,029
How are you? You look so cool.
436
00:16:39,218 --> 00:16:41,565
- Oh, stop. I look ridiculous.
- Yeah, man.
437
00:16:41,650 --> 00:16:43,400
But you know, it's good
to have a look around here.
438
00:16:43,485 --> 00:16:44,901
Boy, do I know it.
439
00:16:44,987 --> 00:16:45,902
This is Ilana.
440
00:16:45,988 --> 00:16:49,094
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
- I recognize you from Abbi's Instagram.
441
00:16:49,129 --> 00:16:51,537
- That means so much to me, thank you.
- Thank you.
442
00:16:51,687 --> 00:16:53,220
It means so much to me
that you guys are here.
443
00:16:53,255 --> 00:16:54,674
Dude, so?
444
00:16:54,997 --> 00:16:55,962
Is this it?
445
00:16:56,048 --> 00:16:57,664
- This is it.
- Wow.
446
00:16:57,749 --> 00:16:58,576
Wow, wow, wow.
447
00:16:58,722 --> 00:17:00,136
- It's...
- Be honest, what do you think?
448
00:17:00,269 --> 00:17:01,334
It's... I mean, it's...
449
00:17:01,470 --> 00:17:02,502
I get it.
450
00:17:02,588 --> 00:17:03,587
- Like, I understand it, completely.
- Me too.
451
00:17:03,672 --> 00:17:04,618
- I get it, too...
- You get it?
452
00:17:04,619 --> 00:17:07,375
- Yes.
- I painted it with the end of a feather.
453
00:17:07,410 --> 00:17:10,424
Not the end that you write with,
with the soft end of a feather,
454
00:17:10,512 --> 00:17:13,430
so it actually took me
two-and-a-half years.
455
00:17:13,515 --> 00:17:16,099
Wow. This is, like,
a real gallery, dude.
456
00:17:16,184 --> 00:17:18,602
- They don't even serve food.
- It's so crazy. But you know what?
457
00:17:18,687 --> 00:17:21,200
Honestly, Abbi, you could
so easily be here, too.
458
00:17:21,235 --> 00:17:22,572
Seriously.
459
00:17:22,691 --> 00:17:25,103
Has Abbi ever told you
about her line landscapes?
460
00:17:25,138 --> 00:17:27,830
- She doesn't tell me much.
- Oh, my God, she's so humble.
461
00:17:27,865 --> 00:17:32,699
They're so surreal,
but at the same time,
462
00:17:32,784 --> 00:17:35,050
they were so real.
463
00:17:35,085 --> 00:17:36,503
You think so?
464
00:17:36,588 --> 00:17:40,507
And at the same time,
they were so surreal.
465
00:17:40,592 --> 00:17:43,793
But at the same time, they were...
466
00:17:43,879 --> 00:17:45,095
They were just so real.
467
00:17:45,213 --> 00:17:46,609
Oh. Stop it.
468
00:17:46,644 --> 00:17:49,716
- It's true.
- Um... so is Donna here?
469
00:17:49,801 --> 00:17:51,601
Oh, my God.
470
00:17:51,720 --> 00:17:53,192
I didn't tell you?
471
00:17:53,227 --> 00:17:54,914
- What?
- Okay, so...
472
00:17:55,107 --> 00:17:58,475
you know how after senior year,
473
00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:00,277
all of my clothes were
missing? All of my clothes.
474
00:18:00,424 --> 00:18:02,136
- That is so sad.
- Uh, yeah.
475
00:18:02,296 --> 00:18:04,030
How could I forget. It was nuts.
476
00:18:04,116 --> 00:18:06,688
So last year, I see Donna
walking down the street,
477
00:18:07,112 --> 00:18:10,870
wearing the sweater that
my grandmother made me.
478
00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:12,372
Shut up. (whooping)
479
00:18:12,457 --> 00:18:15,792
So I confronted her on it
and we had this huge fight
480
00:18:15,911 --> 00:18:17,243
and now we don't speak.
481
00:18:17,379 --> 00:18:19,978
I mean, who steals clothes?
482
00:18:20,232 --> 00:18:21,416
Honestly?
483
00:18:22,281 --> 00:18:23,608
Trashy.
484
00:18:24,002 --> 00:18:25,585
Trashy... Person.
485
00:18:25,671 --> 00:18:26,418
Yeah. (gagging)
486
00:18:26,549 --> 00:18:29,218
Oh, Abbi, that's the curator.
She would love your stuff.
487
00:18:29,291 --> 00:18:30,807
I'm gonna go run over and grab her,
488
00:18:30,926 --> 00:18:32,025
I'm gonna bring her back
here and introduce you two.
489
00:18:32,060 --> 00:18:33,407
- That would be amazing.
- Oh, this is perfect.
490
00:18:33,567 --> 00:18:34,978
I love you, dude.
491
00:18:35,097 --> 00:18:37,814
You're so talented, and you're the best.
492
00:18:37,833 --> 00:18:39,015
You look so hot.
493
00:18:39,101 --> 00:18:40,567
(bleep)... We gotta
get this thing off me.
494
00:18:40,652 --> 00:18:42,569
She's gonna think I stole
all her (bleep) clothes.
495
00:18:42,654 --> 00:18:44,270
My therapist is gonna have a field day.
496
00:18:44,356 --> 00:18:46,598
Maybe if I just, like, pull the fabric?
497
00:18:46,633 --> 00:18:48,074
Like, we gotta get this off.
498
00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:50,410
You know what... My teeth.
My teeth are huge, come on.
499
00:18:50,495 --> 00:18:51,945
Huge and sharp.
500
00:18:52,080 --> 00:18:53,780
Shh, shh!
501
00:18:53,865 --> 00:18:55,081
(popping)
502
00:18:55,167 --> 00:18:56,499
(gasping)
503
00:18:56,618 --> 00:18:58,618
(screaming) No!
504
00:18:58,704 --> 00:19:01,621
(crying, clapping)
505
00:19:01,707 --> 00:19:02,288
(silence)
506
00:19:02,374 --> 00:19:04,824
Sh... She didn't steal it.
507
00:19:04,910 --> 00:19:05,871
Get out!
508
00:19:05,874 --> 00:19:08,762
(Abbi) No, Max Anne,
no. Come on. Come on.
509
00:19:08,847 --> 00:19:10,263
How could you?
510
00:19:10,349 --> 00:19:11,631
(crying) No, Max Anne...
511
00:19:11,767 --> 00:19:13,433
- Get out!
- No!
512
00:19:13,518 --> 00:19:15,435
Stop touching it and go!
513
00:19:15,520 --> 00:19:17,017
Okay.
514
00:19:17,052 --> 00:19:18,138
I...
515
00:19:18,223 --> 00:19:20,807
(Max Anne) Go!
516
00:19:20,892 --> 00:19:22,525
Go faster!
517
00:19:24,646 --> 00:19:26,813
So sorry.
518
00:19:26,898 --> 00:19:28,031
(clanking)
519
00:19:28,981 --> 00:19:31,772
- Of course.
- Ilana... Get off the balls.
520
00:19:32,037 --> 00:19:33,486
It is a magnet.
521
00:19:33,622 --> 00:19:34,788
Help me now.
522
00:19:34,873 --> 00:19:35,989
Get off of it.
523
00:19:36,074 --> 00:19:38,041
Use your upper body strength.
524
00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:40,430
Help her get off of it and go!
525
00:19:40,826 --> 00:19:42,879
Oh!
526
00:19:46,885 --> 00:19:48,585
Okay.
527
00:19:48,670 --> 00:19:50,170
Okay.
528
00:19:50,305 --> 00:19:53,890
You don't need to steady it, just go.
529
00:19:54,009 --> 00:19:55,508
Go!
530
00:19:55,594 --> 00:19:56,843
You're a bitch!
531
00:19:56,928 --> 00:19:59,012
Congrats.
532
00:19:59,147 --> 00:20:02,399
(sobbing)
533
00:20:04,990 --> 00:20:10,326
534
00:20:10,462 --> 00:20:12,122
Let's do this.
535
00:20:13,498 --> 00:20:16,371
It's hard for me not
to feel sexual at all.
536
00:20:18,460 --> 00:20:20,953
Ilana, can you just, like, suck
your titties in a little bit?
537
00:20:20,988 --> 00:20:22,925
If I had control over
my titties like that,
538
00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:24,881
I'd make them the same size.
539
00:20:25,093 --> 00:20:27,677
Come on, gravity, you (bleep) bitch!
540
00:20:28,065 --> 00:20:29,333
Come on!
541
00:20:29,368 --> 00:20:30,313
(beep) Oh, come on!
542
00:20:30,398 --> 00:20:32,015
- We are so close.
- God!
543
00:20:32,100 --> 00:20:34,567
- Jesus, Ab!
- I'm trying, I mean...
544
00:20:34,686 --> 00:20:37,320
I mean, my hand's in.
545
00:20:37,405 --> 00:20:39,279
- Okay. I got it, it's coming.
- Oh, it's happening.
546
00:20:39,314 --> 00:20:41,364
- Oh, my God!
- Yes!
547
00:20:42,870 --> 00:20:45,101
- God!
- Jesus!
548
00:20:46,766 --> 00:20:48,702
Tell me that isn't sexual.
549
00:20:49,266 --> 00:20:51,002
You're bleeding, dude.
550
00:20:51,052 --> 00:20:55,602
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