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1
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2
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(Woman) Ohh... ah!
3
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(Man) Oh, oh, oh, oh.
4
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Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah.
5
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(Man) Yeah.
6
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Oh yeah, oh, unh.
7
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Oh...
8
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Unh...
9
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Ah... Mmm...
10
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Yeah, that's a nice beach ball...
11
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Oh, yeah, uh...
12
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(Gasping)
13
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Uh... uh... Oh...
14
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Trey.
15
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Four and three and two and one-one
16
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You weren't eating those fries, were you?
17
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- Mm-mm.
- Good, 'cause they're from last night.
18
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Someone left them on the
floor in the bathroom.
19
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Head shot?
20
00:01:27,714 --> 00:01:29,448
Uh, um...
21
00:01:29,515 --> 00:01:30,816
You know, I don't have a head shot.
22
00:01:30,884 --> 00:01:32,752
But I have a r?sum?, so...
23
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Yeah, I don't need to see that.
24
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All right, I'll just cliff
notes it for you then.
25
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Uh, so I currently work at a gym.
26
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- Upscale gym.
- (Sipping loudly)
27
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Uh, long-term, I'm an illustrator,
28
00:01:42,595 --> 00:01:44,496
- visual artist...
- Just let me cut you off right there.
29
00:01:44,564 --> 00:01:46,831
This job, it's putting
wristbands on people.
30
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Honestly, a (Bleep) idiot could do it.
31
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Oh, I'm a... I'm a huge (Bleep) idiot.
32
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Yeah, I'm sorry, I just don't think
33
00:01:52,438 --> 00:01:53,938
you're wristband material.
34
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I'm cleaning pubes for...
35
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I'm sorry, Daphne.
36
00:01:58,077 --> 00:01:59,377
If you could just send the next person in
37
00:01:59,444 --> 00:02:01,612
- that'd be great.
- You're gonna rue the day that you said...
38
00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:02,814
- Okay.
- I'm sure.
39
00:02:07,086 --> 00:02:08,319
You're up.
40
00:02:08,387 --> 00:02:10,421
(Phone vibrating)
41
00:02:11,623 --> 00:02:12,857
Hi.
42
00:02:12,925 --> 00:02:13,691
What's wrong, do you
need me to come get you?
43
00:02:13,759 --> 00:02:14,959
No.
44
00:02:15,027 --> 00:02:16,594
I'm just going to be digging
out other people's pubes
45
00:02:16,662 --> 00:02:18,061
till I'm a great-grandmother.
46
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We'll see about that.
47
00:02:19,431 --> 00:02:20,698
Meet me at the coffee shop.
48
00:02:20,766 --> 00:02:22,400
I have a job opportunity.
49
00:02:22,467 --> 00:02:23,967
Amber alert.
50
00:02:24,035 --> 00:02:24,968
Urgency. (Phone beeping off)
51
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Hello?
52
00:02:26,237 --> 00:02:28,939
What coffee shop, what time, what?
53
00:02:29,007 --> 00:02:30,240
Never any details.
54
00:02:31,476 --> 00:02:34,345
I'm so sorry, I had to take that.
55
00:02:34,413 --> 00:02:37,515
You made that call in the
middle of our conversation.
56
00:02:37,582 --> 00:02:38,716
Did I?
57
00:02:38,784 --> 00:02:41,818
So I was asking, how's university?
58
00:02:41,885 --> 00:02:43,486
College?
59
00:02:43,554 --> 00:02:44,921
It... it was expensive.
60
00:02:44,988 --> 00:02:46,022
Wonderful.
61
00:02:46,089 --> 00:02:47,691
Okay, here's a list of your instructions
62
00:02:47,758 --> 00:02:49,359
for your Saturday with Oliver.
63
00:02:49,427 --> 00:02:51,894
Now Oliver can't have any soy products,
64
00:02:51,962 --> 00:02:54,831
so you know, when in doubt,
just go to Babbo or Nobu
65
00:02:54,898 --> 00:02:56,366
- or Momofuku.
- Yes.
66
00:02:56,434 --> 00:02:59,836
YOLO, FOMO, tippy-tee.
67
00:02:59,903 --> 00:03:02,138
(Chuckling) You are so funny.
68
00:03:02,206 --> 00:03:04,207
Oh, but Ilana, please...
69
00:03:04,274 --> 00:03:06,075
don't get him a slice again.
70
00:03:06,143 --> 00:03:07,176
Apologies.
71
00:03:07,244 --> 00:03:08,777
There's $300 on the counter.
72
00:03:08,846 --> 00:03:11,080
Let Oliver hold it, he needs to learn.
73
00:03:11,148 --> 00:03:13,850
Okay, bye, Ollie.
74
00:03:13,917 --> 00:03:15,184
Bye, mommy.
75
00:03:15,252 --> 00:03:17,854
I love you, you are my sweet treasure.
76
00:03:17,921 --> 00:03:19,222
I'm off to interview Desi Tutu
77
00:03:19,289 --> 00:03:21,457
and wax with Martha Plimpton.
78
00:03:21,524 --> 00:03:22,758
What a bad bitch.
79
00:03:22,826 --> 00:03:24,260
Ilana, look.
80
00:03:24,328 --> 00:03:27,829
Holy moly, that is increds!
81
00:03:27,897 --> 00:03:29,831
Good job, whew!
82
00:03:29,899 --> 00:03:32,033
So how are you?
83
00:03:32,101 --> 00:03:34,435
How "am" I?
84
00:03:34,503 --> 00:03:36,704
Good god, bwah.
85
00:03:36,772 --> 00:03:38,874
Last time I saw you,
you were a toothless spud
86
00:03:38,941 --> 00:03:40,242
sitting in your own poop.
87
00:03:40,309 --> 00:03:42,643
(Chuckling) I like when you babysit.
88
00:03:43,980 --> 00:03:44,946
(Ilana) Four Rs, my friend.
89
00:03:45,014 --> 00:03:47,515
Reduce, re-use, recycle, Rhianna!
90
00:03:47,583 --> 00:03:49,549
I'm sorry, ma'am, we can't reuse cups.
91
00:03:49,617 --> 00:03:51,118
It's a health code violation.
92
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Come on.
93
00:03:53,521 --> 00:03:55,389
This is so gross.
94
00:03:57,125 --> 00:03:58,893
Finally... Ab, Ab.
95
00:03:58,960 --> 00:04:00,027
Nice to meet you, Abbi.
96
00:04:00,095 --> 00:04:01,896
I've heard so much about you.
97
00:04:01,963 --> 00:04:03,297
What are you, on the campaign trail?
98
00:04:03,365 --> 00:04:04,865
Oliver, you're a child.
99
00:04:04,933 --> 00:04:06,966
Give her a full-bodied hug and mean it.
100
00:04:07,034 --> 00:04:08,034
Okay.
101
00:04:08,102 --> 00:04:10,736
- I mean it.
- I mean it too.
102
00:04:12,873 --> 00:04:14,073
Juice, my man.
103
00:04:14,141 --> 00:04:15,574
Stand guard.
104
00:04:16,977 --> 00:04:18,477
So, uh, this kid's parents know
105
00:04:18,545 --> 00:04:19,946
that you're watching him, right?
106
00:04:20,014 --> 00:04:21,180
Yes-uh.
107
00:04:21,248 --> 00:04:23,283
I'm doing more than "watching" him.
108
00:04:23,350 --> 00:04:24,683
I am molding him.
109
00:04:24,751 --> 00:04:27,520
Oliver is at a tipping
point right now, okay?
110
00:04:27,587 --> 00:04:29,855
If I didn't step in, he could go to Yale.
111
00:04:29,923 --> 00:04:33,125
And then Yale law and then kill a stripper
112
00:04:33,192 --> 00:04:34,359
and settle out of court.
113
00:04:34,428 --> 00:04:37,296
Jesus, Ilana, he's an innocent little boy.
114
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Yeah, for now...
115
00:04:39,833 --> 00:04:41,133
But if I don't do something,
116
00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:45,203
he could turn into another
useless rich old white man.
117
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Hm.
118
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Why am I here right now?
119
00:04:48,174 --> 00:04:50,708
Okay, all business, getting to it.
120
00:04:52,945 --> 00:04:54,512
Ilana, I'm not watching porn in here.
121
00:04:54,580 --> 00:04:57,315
First of all, everybody's
watching porn in here.
122
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Okay?
123
00:05:01,119 --> 00:05:02,153
You got it?
124
00:05:02,220 --> 00:05:05,523
Second of all, you need to trust me because
125
00:05:05,591 --> 00:05:09,093
you're about to experience
the best moment of your life.
126
00:05:09,161 --> 00:05:12,395
Okay, so I need to retrace
my porn steps first.
127
00:05:12,464 --> 00:05:15,065
I don't watch anything but solo porn
128
00:05:15,132 --> 00:05:16,366
because regular porn is like,
129
00:05:16,434 --> 00:05:20,637
"shut up, little girl, wash my feet!"
130
00:05:20,705 --> 00:05:23,740
And she's like, "uh,
don't tell my dad, okay?
131
00:05:23,808 --> 00:05:26,209
'Cause I'm just barely legal.
132
00:05:26,277 --> 00:05:31,281
I love shaved pubes and tan,
crispy bellies and tits."
133
00:05:31,349 --> 00:05:32,649
It's like, ugh.
134
00:05:32,717 --> 00:05:35,418
So I started with average-size penis jerk.
135
00:05:35,486 --> 00:05:38,554
- Of course.
- That led me to twins squirting, hello.
136
00:05:38,622 --> 00:05:42,125
Which then brought me to
frosted tips masturbation.
137
00:05:42,193 --> 00:05:44,627
(Sighing)
138
00:05:44,695 --> 00:05:47,030
Whoa, I just usually Google "porn".
139
00:05:47,098 --> 00:05:48,698
That's probably why I really, really
140
00:05:48,765 --> 00:05:50,100
don't like most of it.
141
00:05:50,167 --> 00:05:52,469
Um, I don't know, maybe you should just
142
00:05:52,536 --> 00:05:53,603
check your search history.
143
00:05:53,670 --> 00:05:55,937
Oh my god, uh-doi.
144
00:05:58,074 --> 00:05:59,041
Oh my god, get ready, bitch.
145
00:06:00,410 --> 00:06:01,676
- (Moaning)
- (Chuckling)
146
00:06:01,744 --> 00:06:03,712
Oh my god.
147
00:06:03,779 --> 00:06:05,414
Oh...
148
00:06:05,482 --> 00:06:06,848
My...
149
00:06:06,916 --> 00:06:08,083
God.
150
00:06:08,151 --> 00:06:09,584
Trey is in a porn!
151
00:06:09,652 --> 00:06:12,254
Kirk Steele?
152
00:06:12,322 --> 00:06:14,088
Hold on, Ilana. (Bleep)
153
00:06:14,156 --> 00:06:16,957
So before Trey was my
boss, he was a porn star?
154
00:06:17,026 --> 00:06:21,162
- So, so I'm taking orders from a porn star.
- (Laughing)
155
00:06:21,230 --> 00:06:22,963
I can't even believe this.
156
00:06:23,032 --> 00:06:24,065
What do I even do with this?
157
00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:25,799
I don't know what to do with this?
158
00:06:25,867 --> 00:06:28,636
Use it, bitch.
159
00:06:31,106 --> 00:06:31,972
Oh, yeah.
160
00:06:33,542 --> 00:06:34,575
(Humming)
161
00:06:34,643 --> 00:06:35,943
(Trey) Abbi?
162
00:06:36,011 --> 00:06:37,110
There you are.
163
00:06:37,178 --> 00:06:38,946
I'm always looking for you, I love it.
164
00:06:39,014 --> 00:06:42,349
(English accent) So there's a bloody
(Bleep) spill in the spin studio.
165
00:06:42,417 --> 00:06:44,752
(Chuckling) But really,
there's a bloody (Bleep) spill
166
00:06:44,819 --> 00:06:46,654
- in the spin studio.
- Oh, is there?
167
00:06:46,721 --> 00:06:48,589
- Next level, yeah.
- Oh.
168
00:06:50,425 --> 00:06:52,626
And?
169
00:06:52,694 --> 00:06:54,194
And I need you to clean it.
170
00:06:54,262 --> 00:06:57,830
Oh, I would, but I gotta
relax before I teach
171
00:06:57,898 --> 00:07:00,499
the 12:30 kick ass kettle bell class.
172
00:07:00,568 --> 00:07:02,101
What are you talking about right now?
173
00:07:02,169 --> 00:07:04,737
You know, I'm coming down
with something, I think.
174
00:07:04,805 --> 00:07:06,606
There's a lot of phlegm.
175
00:07:06,674 --> 00:07:08,374
(Clearing throat)
176
00:07:11,011 --> 00:07:12,912
Whoa, that is a lot of phlegm, isn't it?
177
00:07:12,980 --> 00:07:14,981
Abbi, that trick is for after hours, okay?
178
00:07:15,049 --> 00:07:17,617
Oh, is it...
179
00:07:17,685 --> 00:07:18,952
Kirk?
180
00:07:22,389 --> 00:07:23,722
Let's go to your office right now.
181
00:07:23,790 --> 00:07:25,091
I don't have an office.
182
00:07:25,158 --> 00:07:27,859
183
00:07:27,927 --> 00:07:29,027
Get in.
184
00:07:31,598 --> 00:07:32,764
Trey, this isn't my office.
185
00:07:32,832 --> 00:07:34,333
Yeah, it is, all your stuff's in here.
186
00:07:34,491 --> 00:07:36,358
This is your snake and your cardigan.
187
00:07:36,426 --> 00:07:37,926
All right, you got your tweezer
and your tweezing mirror.
188
00:07:37,994 --> 00:07:39,228
No one else uses this.
189
00:07:39,296 --> 00:07:41,497
This is a picture of you and
your childhood pug, all right?
190
00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:45,767
Fine, it's my (Bleep) office.
191
00:07:45,835 --> 00:07:47,169
Abbi, when you said,
192
00:07:47,237 --> 00:07:49,871
"Kirk Steele: A man on a
mission, a (Bleep) mission",
193
00:07:49,939 --> 00:07:51,406
what did you mean?
194
00:07:51,473 --> 00:07:53,175
Well, I just said "Kirk",
195
00:07:53,242 --> 00:07:55,310
but you have now confirmed
that you are a porn star.
196
00:07:55,377 --> 00:07:57,345
Thank you for calling me a star.
197
00:07:57,413 --> 00:07:58,747
But Abbi, you can't tell anyone, all right?
198
00:07:58,815 --> 00:08:00,115
I'll get fired.
199
00:08:00,183 --> 00:08:01,817
Please, Abbi, you gotta swear.
200
00:08:03,552 --> 00:08:04,986
- What do you want, money?
- No.
201
00:08:05,054 --> 00:08:06,722
- I'll go down on you right now.
- No, what?
202
00:08:06,789 --> 00:08:08,123
No.
203
00:08:08,191 --> 00:08:11,593
I want to teach the 12:30
kick ass kettle bell class.
204
00:08:11,660 --> 00:08:13,161
We can start there. That's Gemma's class.
205
00:08:13,229 --> 00:08:14,362
I don't care.
206
00:08:14,430 --> 00:08:16,965
- Look, can't I just go down on you?
- No, stop it.
207
00:08:17,033 --> 00:08:19,400
I think it would be in
your best interest...
208
00:08:19,468 --> 00:08:20,401
Kirk.
209
00:08:21,904 --> 00:08:23,371
Yes, looking good.
210
00:08:23,439 --> 00:08:25,339
Whoo, my man, yes!
211
00:08:25,406 --> 00:08:26,440
All right, guys, what's up?
212
00:08:26,507 --> 00:08:27,574
My name is Abbi.
213
00:08:27,642 --> 00:08:29,210
I'm going to be your trainer today.
214
00:08:29,277 --> 00:08:30,044
This is a joke shirt.
215
00:08:30,112 --> 00:08:31,311
Cool.
216
00:08:31,379 --> 00:08:32,947
All right, I'm going to show
you guys how it's done first
217
00:08:33,014 --> 00:08:36,217
and remember, form is essential!
218
00:08:36,284 --> 00:08:37,151
Okay.
219
00:08:47,996 --> 00:08:49,397
Get back in your office.
220
00:08:50,832 --> 00:08:52,332
I don't know what just
happened with my body.
221
00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:54,168
It's like I literally have
zero upper body strength.
222
00:08:54,235 --> 00:08:55,469
Abbi...
223
00:08:55,537 --> 00:08:57,271
That mirror cost $1400
without installation.
224
00:08:57,338 --> 00:08:59,941
Okay, don't accidents happen
all the time in the gym?
225
00:09:00,008 --> 00:09:01,141
Can't the gym just pay for it?
226
00:09:01,209 --> 00:09:02,543
I can't report this to corporate, Abbi.
227
00:09:02,611 --> 00:09:03,978
You're not an authorized instructor.
228
00:09:04,046 --> 00:09:06,180
Okay, well, I'll just take the blame.
229
00:09:06,247 --> 00:09:07,782
I mean, I (Bleep) this up.
230
00:09:07,849 --> 00:09:09,483
Yeah, but I let you teach the class, Abbi.
231
00:09:09,551 --> 00:09:11,518
It's taken me four years to get where I am,
232
00:09:11,587 --> 00:09:13,087
but they're going to fire
me for this in a second.
233
00:09:13,154 --> 00:09:14,388
Please, Abbi, I have a kid.
234
00:09:14,456 --> 00:09:16,023
- What, you do?
- Probably!
235
00:09:16,091 --> 00:09:18,059
- I mean, a paternity suit could pop up at any time.
- Ugh, okay.
236
00:09:19,695 --> 00:09:20,595
What do we do?
237
00:09:20,662 --> 00:09:22,062
Okay.
238
00:09:22,129 --> 00:09:23,329
We gotta get $1400
239
00:09:23,397 --> 00:09:26,132
and we gotta meet back
here tonight after closing.
240
00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:27,467
We'll install the mirror together.
241
00:09:27,534 --> 00:09:28,602
I've done it once before.
242
00:09:28,669 --> 00:09:30,870
Listen, I don't have 700
bucks just lying around.
243
00:09:30,938 --> 00:09:32,271
That's like a whole month's rent for me.
244
00:09:32,339 --> 00:09:33,573
Do you have a webcam?
245
00:09:36,410 --> 00:09:38,044
I never ride the subway.
246
00:09:38,112 --> 00:09:40,013
Usually just Uber, but sometimes...
247
00:09:40,081 --> 00:09:43,449
Shh, Oliver, we don't
talk about Uber down here.
248
00:09:43,517 --> 00:09:45,184
Let's play a game.
249
00:09:45,252 --> 00:09:46,753
I want you to look around
250
00:09:46,821 --> 00:09:49,422
and find the most disadvantaged person here
251
00:09:49,490 --> 00:09:50,923
and then we'll give them our seats.
252
00:09:50,991 --> 00:09:51,890
Who do you think it is?
253
00:09:54,461 --> 00:09:55,961
It's you, Oliver.
254
00:09:56,029 --> 00:09:57,563
- Me?
- Yes.
255
00:09:57,631 --> 00:10:00,500
You are rich in money,
but poor in experience.
256
00:10:00,567 --> 00:10:02,768
No, I'm poor.
257
00:10:02,836 --> 00:10:03,969
I get the seat.
258
00:10:04,037 --> 00:10:05,671
You are right, that's right.
259
00:10:05,739 --> 00:10:06,872
There you go.
260
00:10:08,675 --> 00:10:09,807
Lesson learned, Oliver.
261
00:10:09,875 --> 00:10:11,376
Lesson, uh, learned.
262
00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:12,310
(Throat clearing)
263
00:10:13,546 --> 00:10:18,517
264
00:10:24,723 --> 00:10:26,491
Okay, okay, Abbi, think, come on.
265
00:10:26,559 --> 00:10:27,925
$700, all right.
266
00:10:27,993 --> 00:10:29,027
Come on, here we go.
267
00:10:30,595 --> 00:10:31,529
Come on.
268
00:10:31,596 --> 00:10:32,997
(Breathing deeply)
269
00:10:33,065 --> 00:10:34,598
Sell mushroom chocolates!
270
00:10:34,667 --> 00:10:36,333
No, I can't do that.
271
00:10:36,401 --> 00:10:37,234
Can't get back in the game.
272
00:10:37,302 --> 00:10:38,369
Just got my record expunged.
273
00:10:38,436 --> 00:10:39,303
Okay.
274
00:10:43,042 --> 00:10:44,809
(Bleep), this is really warped!
275
00:10:44,877 --> 00:10:49,413
276
00:10:58,823 --> 00:11:01,524
(Breathing deeply) Ask
my parents for money.
277
00:11:01,592 --> 00:11:03,359
No, they think I'm a successful artist.
278
00:11:06,630 --> 00:11:07,864
Art!
279
00:11:07,932 --> 00:11:09,299
Sell my art!
280
00:11:09,366 --> 00:11:11,267
It's brilliant, but no one understands it.
281
00:11:14,572 --> 00:11:15,605
Sell my clothes.
282
00:11:15,673 --> 00:11:16,939
I get compliments.
283
00:11:19,743 --> 00:11:21,110
Beacon's closet!
284
00:11:23,514 --> 00:11:25,248
Sell my art and my clothes!
285
00:11:25,316 --> 00:11:26,982
Yes!
286
00:11:27,050 --> 00:11:28,084
Oh god.
287
00:11:28,151 --> 00:11:29,452
You ever been to Brooklyn?
288
00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:31,020
No.
289
00:11:31,088 --> 00:11:32,222
You ever been to Queens?
290
00:11:32,289 --> 00:11:33,923
No. Do you ever been to Long Island?
291
00:11:33,990 --> 00:11:35,225
Hamptons.
292
00:11:36,527 --> 00:11:37,826
Ooh, she does not look happy.
293
00:11:37,893 --> 00:11:38,893
Hi.
294
00:11:41,163 --> 00:11:42,497
Clothes.
295
00:11:42,565 --> 00:11:43,498
Hi.
296
00:11:45,335 --> 00:11:46,401
How's it going?
297
00:11:46,469 --> 00:11:48,837
Could you, uh, wait over there?
298
00:11:48,904 --> 00:11:50,672
- Yeah. Okay.
- For a minute?
299
00:11:50,740 --> 00:11:51,607
- All right.
- Thank you.
300
00:11:53,476 --> 00:11:54,743
Good luck, give it your all.
301
00:11:56,245 --> 00:11:58,713
That one's so pretty, my mom got it for me.
302
00:12:00,582 --> 00:12:02,683
Well, you know, it smells
like fresh detergent, right?
303
00:12:05,320 --> 00:12:07,355
Oh, that skirt's one
of my favourite pieces.
304
00:12:07,422 --> 00:12:08,822
Um, I got it when I thought I was gonna
305
00:12:08,890 --> 00:12:10,324
study abroad in Copenhagen,
306
00:12:10,392 --> 00:12:12,993
but tags are on it, so, oh, yes, okay.
307
00:12:15,696 --> 00:12:16,463
Okay.
308
00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,269
Doesn't feel so good, does it?
309
00:12:22,336 --> 00:12:24,337
It's so much harder to walk.
310
00:12:24,405 --> 00:12:25,838
But honestly, your legs look amazing.
311
00:12:25,906 --> 00:12:28,375
As well as my tukas?
312
00:12:28,442 --> 00:12:32,178
(Giggling) It's tucchus,
but I am loving it, brother.
313
00:12:33,381 --> 00:12:35,881
Oh, I saw a denim jacket like that
314
00:12:35,948 --> 00:12:37,449
on "who wore it best?"
315
00:12:37,517 --> 00:12:39,117
- Leighton Meester wore it best.
- So that's it?
316
00:12:39,185 --> 00:12:41,186
There's nothing left?
317
00:12:41,254 --> 00:12:42,454
Um, yeah, just all this great stuff.
318
00:12:42,522 --> 00:12:43,489
Hmm...
319
00:12:43,556 --> 00:12:45,891
I like this apothecary bag.
320
00:12:45,958 --> 00:12:47,326
It's interesting.
321
00:12:47,394 --> 00:12:48,761
Oh, that was my aunt's.
322
00:12:48,828 --> 00:12:50,429
Um, she wa... she was a flight attendant.
323
00:12:50,497 --> 00:12:51,830
She died in that plane crash.
324
00:12:51,898 --> 00:12:53,998
- It was terrible over the midwest.
- So sad.
325
00:12:54,065 --> 00:12:58,436
I can give you store
credit for $195 or $20 cash.
326
00:13:06,144 --> 00:13:07,312
All right.
327
00:13:07,379 --> 00:13:09,180
All right, I'll take... I'll take the cash.
328
00:13:12,350 --> 00:13:14,318
Mmm, that'll be 35 bucks, babe.
329
00:13:14,385 --> 00:13:15,585
What a bargain!
330
00:13:16,821 --> 00:13:20,056
331
00:13:20,124 --> 00:13:21,991
Celebrity's favourite foods.
332
00:13:22,059 --> 00:13:23,960
Original pieces, people!
333
00:13:24,028 --> 00:13:24,928
Bitch's gotta buy a mirror here.
334
00:13:24,995 --> 00:13:26,129
Come on, come on!
335
00:13:26,197 --> 00:13:27,798
I did it, Ilana.
336
00:13:27,865 --> 00:13:30,033
- I gave all the clothes to the homeless people.
- Whoo!
337
00:13:30,100 --> 00:13:31,067
Good job, bud.
338
00:13:31,135 --> 00:13:32,335
Originals.
339
00:13:34,938 --> 00:13:35,705
Tapas.
340
00:13:35,772 --> 00:13:37,473
I'm into them.
341
00:13:37,541 --> 00:13:38,607
How about two?
342
00:13:38,675 --> 00:13:40,008
I mean, they're 40 bucks.
343
00:13:40,076 --> 00:13:42,578
But I'm feeling really great right now.
344
00:13:42,646 --> 00:13:43,446
I'm in a great mood.
345
00:13:43,513 --> 00:13:44,814
I'll give you two for $60.
346
00:13:44,881 --> 00:13:46,615
Love it. Well, I meant $2.00.
347
00:13:46,683 --> 00:13:47,717
- We'll take it.
- No way.
348
00:13:47,784 --> 00:13:49,084
Ilana. No way.
349
00:13:49,152 --> 00:13:50,752
No.
350
00:13:50,820 --> 00:13:53,588
- I'm like, what, am I gonna sell my soul?
- It's good to have standards.
351
00:13:53,656 --> 00:13:55,256
- $2.00.
- Okay, let's do it.
352
00:13:57,926 --> 00:13:59,193
Oh. That's hysterical.
353
00:13:59,261 --> 00:14:00,795
$40, huh?
354
00:14:00,863 --> 00:14:02,764
Yeah, which is a really great deal,
355
00:14:02,832 --> 00:14:06,100
uh, considering the art will
only continue to appreciate.
356
00:14:06,238 --> 00:14:08,773
Of course, shrimp cocktail's
Ron Howard's favourite food.
357
00:14:08,841 --> 00:14:10,774
He probably has it
three, four times a week,
358
00:14:10,842 --> 00:14:12,242
that (Bleep) pussy.
359
00:14:12,310 --> 00:14:14,511
Uh, it's a fictional series
360
00:14:14,579 --> 00:14:17,948
based on the artist's imagination, um...
361
00:14:18,015 --> 00:14:19,550
Wait a minute, you mean this is not real?
362
00:14:19,617 --> 00:14:22,385
Like Bruce Springsteen's
favourite food is not a tomato?
363
00:14:22,454 --> 00:14:25,722
No, I mean, he's from Jersey,
so I put him with a tomato
364
00:14:25,790 --> 00:14:27,991
'cause I was like, that's a
marriage, you know, that works.
365
00:14:28,059 --> 00:14:30,192
Ah, come on, this is unbelievable!
366
00:14:30,260 --> 00:14:31,393
What kind of (Bleep) is this?
367
00:14:31,462 --> 00:14:33,429
- What?
- Is it that unbelievable?
368
00:14:33,497 --> 00:14:35,498
Forty doll... I give $40,
I'm gonna get a little more
369
00:14:35,566 --> 00:14:37,467
than artwork from you
over there, sweet cheeks.
370
00:14:37,534 --> 00:14:39,435
Why don't you (Bleep) my (Bleep) dick?
371
00:14:39,503 --> 00:14:40,603
Hey, listen, I've been there, sweetie.
372
00:14:40,671 --> 00:14:41,637
I've been there.
373
00:14:41,705 --> 00:14:42,672
- To my dick?
- Yeah.
374
00:14:44,266 --> 00:14:46,701
20, 21... twen...
375
00:14:46,769 --> 00:14:48,569
There's just $22 still.
376
00:14:48,637 --> 00:14:50,071
Okay, I'll be right back.
377
00:14:50,139 --> 00:14:51,639
Okay, Oliver, I want you to remember
378
00:14:51,707 --> 00:14:54,308
that most of this day is a secret, okay?
379
00:14:54,376 --> 00:14:57,112
Adults aren't supposed to
ask kids to keep secrets.
380
00:14:57,179 --> 00:14:58,479
Oh.
381
00:15:03,284 --> 00:15:05,118
Hey, guy, how was your day?
382
00:15:05,186 --> 00:15:07,120
We hung out with Abbi, Ilana's girlfriend,
383
00:15:07,188 --> 00:15:09,590
even though they can't
be together right now.
384
00:15:09,658 --> 00:15:10,991
But they will be someday.
385
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:13,260
Ilana.
386
00:15:13,328 --> 00:15:15,596
I had no idea you were gay.
387
00:15:15,664 --> 00:15:16,630
We all...
388
00:15:16,698 --> 00:15:18,265
Having a "gayby"-sitter will be wonderful
389
00:15:18,333 --> 00:15:20,267
for Oliver's CV to get into middle school.
390
00:15:20,335 --> 00:15:21,469
And get this.
391
00:15:21,536 --> 00:15:23,537
We gave all these
clothes to homeless people
392
00:15:23,605 --> 00:15:25,372
and I thought I would
feel dirty afterwards,
393
00:15:25,576 --> 00:15:27,043
but it was so nice.
394
00:15:27,111 --> 00:15:29,377
How very funky.
395
00:15:29,445 --> 00:15:31,413
You were just talking
about how you're so sick
396
00:15:31,481 --> 00:15:33,281
of all your clothes from last season.
397
00:15:33,349 --> 00:15:35,283
Instead of bringing it in to the stables,
398
00:15:35,351 --> 00:15:36,952
you should give it all to Ilana.
399
00:15:37,020 --> 00:15:39,755
She could probably donate
it for you right now.
400
00:15:39,823 --> 00:15:41,624
Well, I mean on the one hand,
401
00:15:41,691 --> 00:15:43,892
the horses do get very cold in the winter,
402
00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:46,394
but on the other, the
less fortunate probably get
403
00:15:46,462 --> 00:15:48,897
just as cold, maybe even more so.
404
00:15:48,965 --> 00:15:52,601
Ilana, do you think this is
something you could do for me?
405
00:15:52,669 --> 00:15:55,137
Um, I do have some stuff...
406
00:15:55,204 --> 00:15:57,639
- I'll give you cash for a cab.
- Yeah, mm-hmm, sure.
407
00:15:57,706 --> 00:15:59,541
(Making kissy sounds)
408
00:15:59,609 --> 00:16:01,309
Yay. Thank you...
409
00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:02,477
For those kisses.
410
00:16:03,679 --> 00:16:05,514
Come on, dude, I thought we were cool.
411
00:16:05,581 --> 00:16:07,815
Now I gotta lug all this
(Bleep) to some Jesus house?
412
00:16:07,883 --> 00:16:09,417
No, you bobo.
413
00:16:09,485 --> 00:16:11,853
My mom's stuff is fancy as (Bleep).
414
00:16:11,920 --> 00:16:14,222
Take it back to Beacon's and
sell the (Bleep) out of it.
415
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:19,026
The student has become the teacher.
416
00:16:19,093 --> 00:16:22,363
Yes, queen, yes, queen, yes, queen!
417
00:16:24,132 --> 00:16:25,599
(Mouthing silently) Yes, queen!
418
00:16:26,934 --> 00:16:28,902
Ilana, do the homeless like Prada?
419
00:16:28,970 --> 00:16:30,171
(Oliver) Yes, queen!
420
00:16:31,439 --> 00:16:33,407
Where my scallywags at
421
00:16:36,244 --> 00:16:38,111
ready catch
422
00:16:38,180 --> 00:16:40,814
party from the drop
until the sun beams
423
00:16:40,882 --> 00:16:44,151
flying flying from the
loosey in my blood stream
424
00:16:44,218 --> 00:16:47,420
see my people ready
now-ow ready now-ow
425
00:16:47,488 --> 00:16:50,891
my oopa take you steady
now-ow steady now-ow
426
00:16:50,958 --> 00:16:53,126
don't need no drink
I think I'm rolling
427
00:16:53,194 --> 00:16:54,995
(Abbi) Oh...
428
00:16:55,063 --> 00:16:56,462
Remember me?
429
00:16:58,066 --> 00:16:59,932
Well, do you remember me?
430
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:01,967
- Even less.
- We were just in here two hours ago.
431
00:17:02,035 --> 00:17:03,503
Come on. Well...
432
00:17:03,571 --> 00:17:04,837
Do you work on commission?
433
00:17:04,905 --> 00:17:07,307
- No.
- Yeah, do you work on commission?
434
00:17:07,374 --> 00:17:08,374
I said no.
435
00:17:08,442 --> 00:17:09,576
I didn't hear it.
436
00:17:09,643 --> 00:17:10,743
Big mistake.
437
00:17:10,811 --> 00:17:11,744
Big.
438
00:17:11,812 --> 00:17:12,812
Huge.
439
00:17:12,879 --> 00:17:15,014
440
00:17:15,082 --> 00:17:16,449
Wow.
441
00:17:18,251 --> 00:17:19,918
Remember me now?
442
00:17:19,985 --> 00:17:21,286
We remember you...
443
00:17:21,354 --> 00:17:23,722
'Cause your hair and lipstick looks cute.
444
00:17:23,789 --> 00:17:25,056
Mm-hmm.
445
00:17:28,394 --> 00:17:30,462
I can give you $13,000 in store credit
446
00:17:30,530 --> 00:17:31,996
or $903 in cash.
447
00:17:32,064 --> 00:17:34,266
Woo-hoo, store credit for life!
448
00:17:34,334 --> 00:17:35,500
Dude, I need the money.
449
00:17:35,568 --> 00:17:37,202
Money, right, money, money.
450
00:17:37,270 --> 00:17:40,872
Speaking of which, how much is
my aunt's timeless, beautiful,
451
00:17:40,940 --> 00:17:43,241
classic apothecary bag?
452
00:17:44,409 --> 00:17:46,510
$226.
453
00:17:50,549 --> 00:17:53,051
Wonderful.
454
00:17:53,119 --> 00:17:54,318
By the way...
455
00:17:54,386 --> 00:17:55,854
I know that shirt's from Forever 21.
456
00:17:55,921 --> 00:17:57,087
You're not kidding anybody.
457
00:17:58,289 --> 00:17:59,689
Nice.
458
00:18:03,661 --> 00:18:09,066
459
00:18:09,134 --> 00:18:10,167
I got it.
460
00:18:11,836 --> 00:18:13,670
All right, okay.
461
00:18:13,738 --> 00:18:14,671
Okay, ease your grip.
462
00:18:16,141 --> 00:18:18,341
There we go.
463
00:18:19,543 --> 00:18:20,577
Looks good.
464
00:18:20,645 --> 00:18:22,111
- Yeah.
- They're not gonna know, right?
465
00:18:22,179 --> 00:18:23,846
No one will ever notice.
466
00:18:23,914 --> 00:18:27,016
I'm going home and I'm shutting my blinds
467
00:18:27,084 --> 00:18:30,820
and I'm going to go to sleep like, forever,
468
00:18:30,888 --> 00:18:33,122
until my shift at 10:30 today.
469
00:18:33,190 --> 00:18:34,758
Not so fast, muchacha.
470
00:18:34,825 --> 00:18:36,426
I need you right here.
471
00:18:36,494 --> 00:18:38,328
Trey, there's no way
there's a pube situation.
472
00:18:38,396 --> 00:18:39,763
No one else is here.
473
00:18:39,830 --> 00:18:41,765
Do you put your pubes somewhere?
474
00:18:41,832 --> 00:18:42,799
No.
475
00:18:42,866 --> 00:18:44,233
You're teaching a class today.
476
00:18:44,302 --> 00:18:45,568
And it starts in two hours.
477
00:18:45,636 --> 00:18:46,936
This is a bazinga.
478
00:18:47,004 --> 00:18:49,071
I swear, I've lost all
respect for you, Trey.
479
00:18:49,139 --> 00:18:50,340
It's not a bazinga.
480
00:18:50,408 --> 00:18:52,776
Abbi, you're such a good cleaner.
481
00:18:52,843 --> 00:18:54,311
You're so special.
482
00:18:54,378 --> 00:18:56,078
Plus Regina who normally teaches the class
483
00:18:56,146 --> 00:18:58,682
has been missing for 48 hours.
484
00:18:58,749 --> 00:19:01,117
Love Regina, but that's awesome.
485
00:19:01,185 --> 00:19:03,186
I mean, I can... I...
486
00:19:03,253 --> 00:19:06,289
So I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be a trainer.
487
00:19:06,356 --> 00:19:07,623
- Yeah.
- Of a class.
488
00:19:07,691 --> 00:19:08,825
Just one class.
489
00:19:08,892 --> 00:19:10,993
But I kinda need you to leave me alone
490
00:19:11,061 --> 00:19:13,429
in the studio for a while.
491
00:19:13,496 --> 00:19:15,764
Gotta finish paying off
my half of the mirror.
492
00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:18,234
- Okay.
- 'Kay.
493
00:19:24,407 --> 00:19:26,375
What's up, guys?
494
00:19:26,443 --> 00:19:30,679
Are you ready to rise to your potential?
495
00:19:30,747 --> 00:19:32,347
(Class) Yeah! Let's do this!
496
00:19:32,414 --> 00:19:34,916
Here we go, yeah, here we go!
497
00:19:34,984 --> 00:19:36,751
Come on, yeah, move those arms,
498
00:19:36,819 --> 00:19:38,586
move those legs, move those arms.
499
00:19:38,654 --> 00:19:39,520
Let's go, guys.
500
00:19:39,588 --> 00:19:40,989
What ignites you?
501
00:19:41,057 --> 00:19:42,991
What fuels your fire?
502
00:19:44,193 --> 00:19:45,293
Oh, you know what?
503
00:19:45,361 --> 00:19:46,694
I'll clean that up later, don't worry.
504
00:19:48,752 --> 00:19:49,551
What's up?
505
00:19:49,619 --> 00:19:50,753
I'm Kirk Steele.
506
00:19:50,820 --> 00:19:51,720
I'm 18,
507
00:19:51,788 --> 00:19:52,755
I'm from Orlando, Florida
508
00:19:52,822 --> 00:19:53,856
and my favorite movie
509
00:19:53,924 --> 00:19:55,124
is "Garden State".
510
00:19:55,192 --> 00:19:58,527
Are you ready to explore
the infinite abyss?
511
00:19:58,595 --> 00:20:06,634
512
00:20:06,702 --> 00:20:09,337
When I grow up I either want
to be a stunt choreographer
513
00:20:09,405 --> 00:20:10,805
or I want to work with kids with MS.
514
00:20:12,174 --> 00:20:17,045
515
00:20:21,284 --> 00:20:22,884
Somebody stop me!
516
00:20:22,952 --> 00:20:24,419
Oh (Bleep)!
517
00:20:24,486 --> 00:20:25,486
Oh!
518
00:20:25,554 --> 00:20:26,921
I have two twin sisters.
519
00:20:29,057 --> 00:20:30,757
(Grunting)
520
00:20:30,825 --> 00:20:33,060
Oh god... oh god, (Bleep) oh!
521
00:20:33,128 --> 00:20:36,964
Oh, oh, ooh, oh, oh...
522
00:20:37,032 --> 00:20:40,600
Oh, oh, oh, oh...
523
00:20:40,668 --> 00:20:43,737
Uh... uh!
524
00:20:43,805 --> 00:20:48,842
525
00:20:48,910 --> 00:20:50,944
(Sniffing) Ooh, I stink.
526
00:20:56,500 --> 00:21:01,945
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- www.addic7ed.com -
527
00:21:01,995 --> 00:21:06,545
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