All language subtitles for Barely Famous s01e03 Favorite Socks

?

Okay, sweetie.

Yogurt, granola and strawberries!

I'm allergic to strawberries.

You're allergic to strawberries?

Yeah.

Okay.

That's okay.

I wish your mommy would have told

us that when you auditioned.

[producer's voice] Stand by.

I need a new kid.

Granola, strawberries and yogurt!

Am I the best mommy in the world?

I want my Dada.

You want your Dada.

Okay.

This won't work either.

So what's the solution here?

I need another kid.

Just make it work.

I can't make it work.

[producer's voice] Sara,
why don't you want to work

with your real daughter?

That's not up for discussion.

You're the best mom ever.

You've been practicing.

Mm-hm!

I love it.

My mom's a teen mom.

Yes.

Okay.

I don't have a nanny.

Exactly.

Hi, Auntie Erin.

Hey.

What is this?

We've had a little hiccup with casting.

And you're comfortable
playing a little girl?

Yeah.

Uh-oh, your real daughter's walking in.

Okay.

This is awkward.

So now we have two-

You know, I just... leave your hands there.

Why?

Well, the situation is... is
that you're not, you're not SAG.

[laughs]

Come on, let's go.

[exhales]

That was awkward.

Yeah.

Between you and I...

Mm-hm.

You're a better actor than Sara.

Yeah, I know.

You drove that scene.

Yeah.

- This feels more natural actually-
- Yeah!

Just working with you.

Mm-hm, yeah.

Mm-hm.

Definitely.

- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
- www.addic7ed.com -

?

Motherhood?

Motherhood.

[producer's voice] What
kind of mom are you?

You know, I really don't like
to talk about my personal life.

[producer's voice] Sara, this show

is about your personal life.

I will say, I'm a really fun mom.

You know, I feel like I'm
gonna be the mom that when

I take my kid to school,
all the kids will be like,

'Oh my God!

It's... it's the mom that we love!'

I feel like you're the kind of mom

where like your daughter's always like,

'Why is mommy always sleeping?'

'Wake up, mommy.'

Cheers to motherhood.

The most gratifying...

The most exhausting job in the world.

Is it exhausting?

I'm exhausted... 24-7.

[laughs]

It's so weird, I mean,

I find that my children
just give me more energy.

Oh, interesting.

Especially when we started meditating

together because you do hit
the deepest form of sleep,

it's much more restful.

You guys meditate?

We meditate as a family.

Nicole's one of those people...
she's so down to earth.

She's so normal.

I always forget that Nicole's a celebrity.

She's so sweet, and a great mom.

Really good mom.

Where do they go to school?

They go to Inner Smile, it's amazing.

It's like impossible to get into.

Impossible.

Oh my God.

Did you just say that your
kids are going to Inner Smile?

They are!

Do you know someone that goes there?

Do I know someone who goes there?

What do mea...

I'm going there!

This is so great!

We can do...

That is so interesting.

It's like unbelievable, it's
like almost not believable.

They only accept one person
a year, so that's really...

And that was us!

Inner Smile is by far the best school

in Los Angeles and my
daughter deserves the best.

And I will do whatever it takes for her

to have everything she could ever want.

Parents in L.A. make such a big deal

about what school they get their kid into

like these kids are like three years old

and they're like freaking out,

bragging about where their
kid gets to like take a nap.

It's like, who cares, they're three.

I'm very, very proud.

Yeah.

It's... we're so excited.

Very impressed.

Did she do the internship over the summer?

She did.

She worked for a... a doctor.

Whoa.

I did not know that.

Cheers to the old friendships.

To the cool kids!

Yeah.

Hi!

It's so good to see you!

You too!

What's going on, what's new?

You know, just wanna work so...

Uh, right?

No one wants you to
work more than this guy.

Okay.

My manager Frank is really cool,
but he should be bringing me

opportunities and he's always like,

'Have you written anything?'

and I'm like... 'Have
you gotten me a meeting?'

He wants me to be the pilot
and I want to be the co-pilot

and he is like the
stewardess at this point.

He's not even the stewardess by the way,

he's like the weird dude
that takes the ticket.

At this point, he's just a passenger...

who's like bummed about
having to go somewhere.

Can I be honest with you?

Yes.

I set up these great meetings for you

and you show up and you're like,

- 'Hey I'm this beautiful, attractive-
- Yeah!

confident girl.'

but then it all falls apart

and you do something really
embarrassing or stupid

and self-sabotage the entire thing.

Right.

That time I got you that
meeting with Judd Apatow

and then you drank his iced tea.

I am a firm believer that drinks are not

like a non-shareable thing.

I love that about you.

But you just need to stop it.

Should I go through the list?

Let's do it.

Uh, Warner Brothers just bought the rights

to book about a girl who
grew up in the music industry

and Courteney Cox is attached to produce.

That sounds perfect.

That's literally my life story.

And I love Courteney Cox,

Monica was always my
favorite character on Friends.

I love this passion, I love
what I'm seeing from you.

Yeah!

You know what, I'm going to
submit you for this project.

Okay.

And you gotta promise me something though.

What?

When you go to meet with Courteney,

don't do anything crazy.

I'm charming Frank.

You forget that about me.

You don't show it a lot.

Well... I'm taking this pen.

Hi.

How are you?

Um, I would love to set up
an interview with the Dean.

Oh, okay, well you don't just walk in

and set up an interview with the Dean here.

Oh, really?

Okay.

Ah, well, what do I need to do?

Do I need to get on a list or... ?

You need to be on a list, yes.

Oh, perfect okay.

So how do I be on the list?

Well, you're either on the
list or you're not on the list

that's how it works.

So can you tell me if
I... if I am on the list?

No, I can't.

But I can tell you that
you are not on the list.

Hey, Esther, I'm off
to teach Mrs. O'Leary's

Japanese class.

Got it, I'll hold your calls Dean.

Oh!

Dean?

Hello, hi how are you?

I'm Sara Foster, it's so nice to meet you.

Wonderful to meet you as well.

I am a woman who will stop at nothing.

When I make the decision
that I want something...

watch out world.

I'm coming.

Oh.

That sounded bad.

Sorry, this bag isn't going

with you to Courteney Cox's house.

Why?

Because it's a fake bag.

I want to tell you, you did
a great job with your pitch.

I think you have great ideas

- and I'd love to talk to you more.
- Thank you

Sara, it's so nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you as well.

Gorgeous school-oh, sorry!

I have a daughter, so I would love-

Okay.

Oh!

I forgot I had these on, I just...
I read so much, like trilogies.

I just finished "50 Shades
of Grey," the third part.

Of course you did.

So I'm gonna have to go
and teach the children.

Oh no...

Thank you.

I love children!

Wait.

I love children.

I... feel like that went well.

Um... so, you heard the woman.

Yeah, thank you.

Set up the interview.

It doesn't work like that.

Hello?

Abbey, who do I have to sleep with

to get her into this school?

I'll do it, I'm fine, I'll do it.

You could have Erin do it for
you, isn't that what she does?

That's a good idea.

My assistant Abbey is my
lifeline, she's my eyes,

she's my ears, she's my mouth

and we have the ball in motion, to get

my child into Inner Smile.

Oh my God, they're doing a meet and greet

for the kids via Skype with the astronauts

in the International Space Station.

This is amazing!

This is crazy.

This is where she needs to go!

Oh!

They're having a silent auction fundraiser.

Why don't you just donate something?

What do I have that I could donate?

Hi guys.

Ugh.

Abbey sees me as an obstacle
for how to get closer to Sara.

I think that she wants to scoot closer

and scoot closer until
she's sitting on her lap

and that's still not close enough

and then just she crawls inside of her

and lives upside her ass.

Understandable.

You, uh donating yourself
to Goodwill today?

What's happening?

[laughs]

No, I'm going to Courteney's house.

Courteney...

Cox

Er, I know you love those socks but-

Okay, Sara.

You cannot wear those socks
to Courteney Cox's house.

Who cares they're cute,
they're blue, they peek out,

they're soft, they're
my favorite, I love them.

I hope you get the job.

Me too.

Okay.

Do you think it'll like keep you
out of the house more, this job?

Sorry, this bag isn't going with you

to Courteney Cox's house.

Why?

Gimme my bag!

Because it's a fake bag.

Okay, yes it's a fake
purse, but no one can tell.

- You're not taking this to Courteney Cox's house.
- I can tell.

No one can tell!

I can tell.

Erin.

What?

I have this bag.

The real one.

Yeah.

I'm sure-

It's a $5,000 bag.

By the way, put them side by
side and tell the difference.

Great idea.

Abbey, get my bag.

Okay.

This is a fake Louis Vuitton.

I know that it's fake,
but no one else can tell.

Dad brought it back for me from Malaysia.

Put it there.

When you're wearing those socks with it,

you can tell it's fake.

That has nothing to do with it.

Look.

Look at the difference.

Close your eyes, I'm gonna
switch the bags around.

Okay, which one's yours?

That one.

Thank you.

You don't even know what I did.

This is what I'm donating to the school.

[gasps]

- A $5,000 bag.
- Genius!

You're not taking that bag.

But you can go.

[producer's voice] Let's
roll cameras please.

So Erin, let's talk about how Courteney Cox

would not let us inside her
gate to shoot your meeting.

Can ya blame her?

Guys?

I mean that was super bold for you all

to show up at Courteney Cox's house.

Well I told them to, I
was-it was like, I tried

to just make it casual.

I thought that would be like sort like

of not a big thing, but I realize now

that it probably wasn't the best idea.

You know, she has some weird quirks.

I would say, like her house...
everything is like, white.

You walk in the door
and you immediately feel

like you're making something
dirty just by like existing.

And she was like, 'No shoes please.'

Like, 'Okay, whatever.'

And then she was like,

'Also, no socks.'

So, I had to take my socks off

and I had to like stand for
like 45 seconds in warm water

and... it was weird.

Anyway, the meeting was great.

I will say she has an
obnoxiously long driveway.

What is the point of
having a driveway that long?

I wish that I'd had running shoes

and like a water bottle and a fanny pack

and like a hat 'cause it was a journey.

Hi.

How did it go?

Okay, it went really well.

Are you serious?

Yeah, like I think I got the job.

No!

Oh, shoot, I just noticed
that I left my socks in there.

Who cares if you left your socks there.

Hold on, I'm gonna call you right back.

'Cause I'm just gonna buzz
and say that I left my socks.

This is Courteney Cox, you
can't just go ring her gate,

she said goodbye to you, no?

[through speaker phone]

Well, why not?

If it was anybody else I would go back.

But it's anybody else, it's Courteney Cox!

You can't.

No, she's really nice, she'll
be totally cool about it.

I'm just gonna ask for my socks back.

If you left your child
there, it's like an option.

This is not an option.

Okay.

Fine, I won't do it.

I'm not gonna say anything.

All right.

I want you to get in your car
and I want you to take video

of you driving away and I
want you to send it to me.

Goodbye.

Hello?

I left a pair of socks at your house.

They have ducks on them and they're blue

and they're kind of hard to miss.

I have not seen any socks that are not mine

No?

[voice through speaker] Hello?

Hiii!

It's Erin Foster!

[voice on speaker] Oh, okay.

I actually just left my socks in there?

[voice on speaker] Your what?

Your socks?

Yeah, they have ducks on them they're like

right by the front door.

I'm happy to run down and
get them, they're just...

[voice on speaker] I'll try to find them.

Thank you so much!

Oh, hi!

Okay, I'm so sorry, thank you so much!

Here's your sock.

That's not-

It's disgusting.

Sorry, that's not my sock.

That's an athletic sock.

What are you talking about?

My socks are blue.

No, no, no.

I'm actually confused as
to what you are talking

about because I literally
walked 14 miles up

from the house to bring you this sock.

But, do you see ducks on this sock?

Because that's what I said to you

was that there was ducks on the sock...

Why don't I write you a check?

For $4.50, you can go up the
street, if you go up the street,

take a right-

Uh-huh.

And then take another left, you'll see CVS?

Is that where Sedona is-

No, no, no...

because that's where my
mom bought me these socks.

That's not where Sedona is,
that's actually where CVS is

so you can buy a new pair of socks.

Before you keep talking-

Uh-huh.

Let me just stop you right there.

I have a lot of stuff to do today.

Okay, I'm very, very busy.

All right, thank you so much.

No, no!

Allison!

One second! One second! One second!

My socks back...

I think it's awkward when something

feels really important to you,
but to someone else it looks

like a mundane thing.

You know and it's like you
try to make me look crazy,

give me the socks back
and then this is all cool.

You okay?

Was that the question you asked?

I need you here for me, I need you present,

you need to be my wingman

and your energy is like bringing me down.

I just want to let you know,
I'm not wearing socks today.

'Cause I'm like grieving loss.

How long do I have to hear about the socks?

Could be weeks.

[exhales] Ugghh..kill me, kill me, kill me.

Hi.

Hi.

Okay, take the glasses off.

No one's buying it.

Yeah, put 'em on your collar.

That's good.

Excuse me everyone, can I have
your attention for a minute?

Of course!!

Great!

Thank you so much for coming to our

annual backyard charity event.

Just to let you know the charity auction

is ending in a few minutes so everyone

get their last bids in and
once again every dollar counts.

Money, money, money.

[whispers]

Especially for our children.

Thank you so much for coming.

You're welcome.

[muffled clapping]

She's so sweet.

She looks like she needs to get laid.

Hey, excuse me.

Do you ladies know about this bag?

Who donated it or who's
responsible for the... ?

Me.

[laughs] I donated the bag.

Oh.

We're at $20,000.

Yeah, I saw that.

You know if I could just maybe...

[mouths silently] talk to you privately.

Of course.

[whispers] About the bag.

Oh, of course... like a... yeah, sure.

[whispers] Like a pow-wow...

Yeah.

If you will.

[whispers] That bag is fake.

What's that?

[whispering] You donated a knock-off

for the school auction?

No, no.

Yeah...

Oooh.

I'm a buyer for Barney's
and I can tell you right now

that my expertise is in
handbags and accessories

and there's nothing real
about that bag at all.

This is a crazy misunderstanding.

I have never bought a
fake bag in my life, she...

Hi.

has bought fake bags.

Yeah.

This is her fake bag.

Mine.

Hold on, I just, I
switched them by accident.

It's just not really the way Inner Smile...

We're at $20,000.

Do you want to be responsible for

killing this whole situation?

It's essentially plagiarism.

I have a hundred and-

No, that's very uncomfortable for me.

Forty two dollars.

I just wish she'd stop touching
me at this point, really but...

Yeah.

You're not going to mention
this to anybody are you?

Okay.

But thank you so much,
that was super informative.

All right.

Thank you so much.

Well, it looked like you
grabbed my bag instead of yours.

Told you, that you couldn't
tell the difference.

I blame you for this.

Me?

Interesting.

Oh, my God.

Courteney Cox is here.

When I saw Courteney
Cox, I got super excited

cause I really want to be friends with her.

She would be great for my career.

Are you gonna go?

Yeah, I'm gonna talk to her.

Go talk to her and...
you know, keep it cool.

[purposefully] Yeah, no
I'm gonna talk to her.

No, no! No, no!

Okay.

No, no.

Yeah.

No, no, no.

I swear to God if you embarrass
me at this school function,

you will be evicted.

I'm not going to embarrass you.

Yes, you will.

This is serendipitous that she's here.

Homeless.

Okay.

I gotta go, I gotta go.

I gotta talk to Courteney.

Okay.

Courteney!

If you left your socks at mom's house,

if you left your socks at
your best friend's house,

like sure but when you leave your socks

at one of the biggest
television stars of our time...

If I left something that's
mine, why can't I just say,

'Hey, left that thing.

Thank you, can I come I grab this?'

You don't get it and I just don't-

I don't get it.

And you never will.

Hi!

What brings you here?

Oh, my sister's trying to
get her kid into this school.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

I want to tell you, you did
a great job with your pitch.

I think you have great ideas

and I'd love to talk to you more.

Thank you.

That's really... well,

I'd be really honored to
work on the project with you.

I've actually been wanting
to get a hold of you

because I left a pair
of socks at your house.

And I like talked to your
assistant about it and-

And she couldn't find them?

No, she couldn't find them,
but they have ducks on them

and they're blue and they're
like kind of hard to miss.

[Courteney laughs]

And so I was just wondering if you've seen

them around at your house.

I've not seen any socks that-

No?

Are not mine at least.

[laughs] Right, okay.

All right.

Maybe-

Sorry, yeah.

Maybe I had it... maybe I had it... um.

So you've never seen those socks before?

The blue ones with the yellow ducks?

I have not seen your socks.

[laughs]

The blue ones with the yellow ducks.

Sorry I'm harping on you it's just

weird cause you're wearing them.

[whispering] Um, Erin,
these are not your socks.

I know but they're also not
yours 'cause they're mine.

These are my socks and you're acting

really erratic right now.

Mm-hm.

And it's making me uncomfortable.

Okay.

So it doesn't really bode well for our

future working relationship.

Right, well let's not talk about
the future working relationship.

Let's just talk right now about the socks

that you stole from me.

They're not your socks.

They have ducks on them and they're blue!

These aren't even ducks.

Take the shoe off!

Get your hand off my... shoe!

No, take the shoe off!

Oh my God.

Let go of the socks and let go of my shoe.

One of the socks has a hole in the side

so I'd like you take
your shoe off and show me.

Take my shoe off.

Okay, great.

No, no I said-oh my, God.

[gasps] Look at that.

That is a hole.

That is the hole.

[nervous laughter] Busted.

Those are my socks.

I mean what kind of crazy person says

they've never seen a pair of socks before

and actually stole my socks.

They're mine.

Okay.

Great.

Of course they're yours.

You are too much.

Well you are really, really something, huh?

Here you want your sock?

Here.

Yeah, I do want my sock.

Thank you. Thank you.

Fine.

Can I have the other one?

The left one is 100% mine.

Taking the left sock... that is low.

That is so low... but I'll
take the one that I have.

Mrs. Foster?

I just wanted to personally thank you

so much for your donation.

Your bag raised over

$20,000 for the school.

That's... that is crazy, actually.

I know.

I'm gonna have my assistant set up

an interview appointment
with you next week.

Dean, if you'll allow me.

My expertise is in handbags,
as you know I'm a buyer.

This is what we'd call a

"Louis Fou-ton."

Fake.

Okay.

This is just a crazy misunderstanding.

And I'm happy to explain it to you.

That's a fake?

Yeah.

It's certainly not
worth $15-20,000-

That's...

let alone the $142 she
tried to bribe me with.

That's a vicious lie.

That is a lie.

And you know it.

You're turning red.

I think this is...

You're lying.

Very uncomfortable for everyone here.

I'm uncomfortable.

Clearly, you're not what we're looking for

and I think it's best if you
go and you don't come back

and you can forget about that appointment.

Okay?

Okay.

We're just gonna grab one more of

those little chocolate cake things

and then we're leaving.

You can leave.

Mommy has bad news.

You're not getting into Inner Smile,

but the good news is you're going

to public school down the street.

And you are gonna to have the character

I've always wanted you to have.

Are you as excited as mommy is?

I mean, if I were you, I
would just tell her the truth.

You know?

Are you kidding?

Like there's gonna be
100 kids in your class,

your teacher's not gonna know your name,

your textbooks are gonna be used,

you're gonna get your ass
kicked three days a week,

but it's gonna build
character and that's important.

So that part was true.

But don't say any of the rest of it.

Do I need to home school her?

But for real, I do not want her going

to Inner Smile with these a-hole kids.

Like they are so spoiled,
they are such brats.

They all turn out to be losers.

Yeah, totally homeschooling
her will make sure she's

not a brat or a loser.

Getting feedback's really fun.

Oh, God.

I'm nervous.

Unlikeable is a word nobody
would ever use to describe me.

'I don't pop.'

Is the dumbest note I've ever gotten.

I'm Rich.

I'm Erin.

I'd like to take you out.

You get asked out, where does it come from?

Going out with your camera crew

and a guy in a wheelchair asks you out,

you can't say no because
you're being filmed.

Are you guys on like a date?

Yeah, yeah we are.

Wow.

I'm here to see Rachel.

What's going on?

I have a big event.

What do you have that
will just show it all?

I want you to see my abs,
I want you to see my ass.

I'm okay with a little nipple.

[photographers shouting/overlapping]

How do you do it all, Molly?

Sara!

Who are you again?

Molly's best friends.

Does she show up looking
like a hooker to your events?

Can't hear you, with all the noises and...

Totally.

- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
- www.addic7ed.com -

Repair and Synchronization by
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