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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,919 --> 00:00:04,987 Hey, mom, 2 00:00:05,021 --> 00:00:06,439 love the jacket. 3 00:00:06,473 --> 00:00:08,633 Your late 20s are really treating you well. 4 00:00:08,653 --> 00:00:10,867 And, George Clooney... 5 00:00:11,224 --> 00:00:13,313 What did you do with my dad? 6 00:00:13,333 --> 00:00:14,745 - (Marty and Debbie) What do you want? - Right. Thanks. 7 00:00:14,765 --> 00:00:17,243 So I was wondering if I could go to a lecture 8 00:00:17,263 --> 00:00:20,919 on cultural studies, sometimes referred to as a Jay-Z concert. 9 00:00:20,939 --> 00:00:22,346 When? Night before Friday. 10 00:00:22,366 --> 00:00:24,642 - So Thursday. - You could look at it that way, sure. 11 00:00:24,662 --> 00:00:27,108 - Yeah, not on a school night. - Look, I already turned in all my homework, 12 00:00:27,128 --> 00:00:29,238 Megan's dad is driving, and I'm gonna ask Reggie, 13 00:00:29,258 --> 00:00:31,332 because he's responsible and Asian. 14 00:00:31,352 --> 00:00:33,121 Amber, no. 15 00:00:33,493 --> 00:00:36,440 I don't like your jacket. It looks fat. 16 00:00:37,030 --> 00:00:38,938 Whoa! Slow down there, tiger. 17 00:00:38,958 --> 00:00:41,456 - Eat me! - Mm! She's a charmer, that one. 18 00:00:41,476 --> 00:00:42,459 (Chuckles) (Gasps) 19 00:00:42,479 --> 00:00:43,457 George clooney! 20 00:00:43,477 --> 00:00:44,884 What did you do with Debbie Weaver? 21 00:00:44,904 --> 00:00:46,109 (Debbie and Marty) What do you want, Larry? 22 00:00:46,129 --> 00:00:48,202 We want you to take us to a Broadway musical. 23 00:00:48,237 --> 00:00:49,859 - We've heard wonderful things... - Yeah. 24 00:00:49,879 --> 00:00:52,733 Rumors of singing and dancing and mormons and cats! 25 00:00:52,753 --> 00:00:54,742 Yeah, sorry, guys. We stopped going to musicals 26 00:00:54,776 --> 00:00:57,828 after our $600 family nap at "phantom of the opera." 27 00:00:57,863 --> 00:00:59,263 Besides, whatever you want to see, 28 00:00:59,298 --> 00:01:01,265 Hugh Jackman will eventually turn into a movie. 29 00:01:01,300 --> 00:01:02,934 Fine. We'll just go on our own. 30 00:01:02,968 --> 00:01:06,399 Okay, we know you guys are anxious to experience everything, 31 00:01:06,419 --> 00:01:08,539 but think of all the things that have happened so far... 32 00:01:08,574 --> 00:01:10,580 - Larry almost falling down that well... - Oh... 33 00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:13,233 That Tuesday Jackie spent in the revolving door. 34 00:01:13,253 --> 00:01:14,277 Mm-hmm. 35 00:01:14,297 --> 00:01:17,654 I mean, guys, I don't think you're ready to experience the big stuff without us yet. 36 00:01:17,674 --> 00:01:19,639 - But... - It's not open for discussion. 37 00:01:19,659 --> 00:01:21,841 You never let us do anything. 38 00:01:21,861 --> 00:01:22,887 Your jacket looks fat. 39 00:01:24,633 --> 00:01:25,358 (Clicks tongue) 40 00:01:25,378 --> 00:01:27,007 (Crickets chirping) 41 00:01:30,606 --> 00:01:33,098 (Lowered voice) What are you doing out here, o dark one? 42 00:01:33,118 --> 00:01:35,015 (Lowered voice) Jay-Z concert tomorrow. 43 00:01:35,035 --> 00:01:36,876 I'm sneaking out to pick up tickets. 44 00:01:36,896 --> 00:01:38,696 Ohh, badass! 45 00:01:39,114 --> 00:01:41,576 - (Lowered voice) We're sneaking out, too. - I'm impressed. 46 00:01:41,596 --> 00:01:44,229 We're going to see "Annie." I'm no longer impressed. 47 00:01:44,249 --> 00:01:46,230 It's about a tiny Ginger 48 00:01:46,250 --> 00:01:49,249 who falls in love with a bald man called "tomorrow." 49 00:01:49,269 --> 00:01:50,583 All right, let's make this quick. 50 00:01:50,603 --> 00:01:52,677 I don't rat you out, you won't rat me out. Deal? 51 00:01:52,697 --> 00:01:54,419 - Deal. - All right. 52 00:01:56,327 --> 00:01:58,494 We're really doing this, aren't we, husband? 53 00:01:58,514 --> 00:02:00,688 Yes, wife, we really are. 54 00:02:00,708 --> 00:02:01,808 (Breath quavers) 55 00:02:02,927 --> 00:02:05,533 Let's walk over to New York City. 56 00:02:07,456 --> 00:02:10,042 S01E20 Sing Like a Larry Bird 57 00:02:10,062 --> 00:02:12,785 synced and corrected by ninh www.addic7ed.com 58 00:02:17,609 --> 00:02:19,822 Mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi 59 00:02:19,842 --> 00:02:21,808 - Good morning - (Marty) Ahh! 60 00:02:21,828 --> 00:02:23,282 Good morning 61 00:02:23,302 --> 00:02:25,298 Morning. You guys are in a good mood. 62 00:02:25,318 --> 00:02:26,724 Of course we are, Debbie Weaver. 63 00:02:26,744 --> 00:02:28,736 Hidden hills is alive with the sound of musicals! 64 00:02:28,756 --> 00:02:30,923 Oh, isn't it glorious? I can hear it everywhere... 65 00:02:30,943 --> 00:02:33,514 The birds, the bees, the people, the trees (Both snapping fingers) 66 00:02:33,534 --> 00:02:35,484 (Larry and Jackie) The birds, the bees the people, the trees 67 00:02:35,504 --> 00:02:37,469 All right, okay. What's going on, guys? 68 00:02:37,489 --> 00:02:39,238 - We can't say. - We went to see a musical. 69 00:02:39,258 --> 00:02:41,614 - When?! - What?! We told you not to! 70 00:02:41,634 --> 00:02:43,150 She snuck out, too. 71 00:02:43,170 --> 00:02:47,121 - You snuck out? - Oh, come on, man! So uncool! 72 00:02:47,141 --> 00:02:49,080 I can't believe you, Amber. 73 00:02:49,343 --> 00:02:52,348 I'm really sorry, but you were being kind of unreasonable about the concert, 74 00:02:52,368 --> 00:02:53,301 so I just thought that... 75 00:02:53,321 --> 00:02:55,199 Okay, you know what? Enough with the excuses. 76 00:02:55,219 --> 00:02:57,227 You are grounded. Go to your room and stay there. 77 00:02:57,247 --> 00:02:59,183 Yeah. You're in big trouble, young lady. 78 00:02:59,568 --> 00:03:00,784 Eee! (Shudders) 79 00:03:00,804 --> 00:03:01,521 (Sighs) 80 00:03:01,541 --> 00:03:03,005 Guys, what if something happened to you? 81 00:03:03,025 --> 00:03:04,991 Oh... please. 82 00:03:05,011 --> 00:03:06,931 Oh, the city was so pretty! 83 00:03:06,951 --> 00:03:08,234 Ah, the lights were so bright! 84 00:03:08,254 --> 00:03:10,542 Although New York was further than we thought, 85 00:03:10,562 --> 00:03:13,235 and people could be very rude as we were walking through the tunnel of Lincoln. 86 00:03:13,255 --> 00:03:16,362 You walked to a musical in New York City? 87 00:03:16,672 --> 00:03:19,173 Do you know what could have happened if you would have got discovered 88 00:03:19,193 --> 00:03:20,261 or run over? 89 00:03:20,281 --> 00:03:21,675 Do you want the scientists in the white coats 90 00:03:21,695 --> 00:03:24,232 to come and take over the community? I showed you "E.T.," didn't I? 91 00:03:24,252 --> 00:03:25,684 Yes, you did, and it scared us, okay? 92 00:03:25,704 --> 00:03:26,677 Now let's move on. 93 00:03:26,697 --> 00:03:28,829 Okay, well, we are just trying to keep you safe. 94 00:03:28,849 --> 00:03:32,180 Oh, right, I forgot. We need your help for everything. 95 00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:34,054 Wife, let's go. 96 00:03:34,074 --> 00:03:36,449 That is, if we can figure out how to get out of here 97 00:03:36,469 --> 00:03:38,360 with the weavers' help. Ha! 98 00:03:38,380 --> 00:03:39,072 (Door closes) 99 00:03:39,092 --> 00:03:40,287 That's the pantry. 100 00:03:40,305 --> 00:03:41,305 Mm. 101 00:03:41,340 --> 00:03:43,242 Borrowing this O.J. 102 00:03:44,024 --> 00:03:45,724 That's Mayo! 103 00:03:46,891 --> 00:03:48,454 - Yeah, they don't need us. - No. 104 00:03:49,013 --> 00:03:50,413 (Whirring) 105 00:03:50,433 --> 00:03:52,510 (Rock music playing) 106 00:03:52,697 --> 00:03:54,097 (Cell phone beeps) (Buttons clicking) 107 00:03:54,471 --> 00:03:55,669 Hey! 108 00:03:55,688 --> 00:03:57,188 You're grounded. 109 00:03:57,222 --> 00:03:58,539 No computer. (Music stops) 110 00:03:58,559 --> 00:03:59,758 No texting. 111 00:03:59,778 --> 00:04:01,976 All right, you know what? I'm sorry I snuck out, 112 00:04:02,010 --> 00:04:03,094 but, honestly, you have to admit, 113 00:04:03,114 --> 00:04:05,294 it's been a little shawshanky around here. 114 00:04:05,502 --> 00:04:07,028 I'm a good kid, mom. 115 00:04:07,048 --> 00:04:08,483 I never do anything wrong. 116 00:04:08,517 --> 00:04:10,468 I wanted to go to one concert. 117 00:04:10,739 --> 00:04:12,289 You could do a lot worse for a daughter. 118 00:04:12,309 --> 00:04:13,421 (Cell phone chimes, buttons resume clicking) 119 00:04:13,455 --> 00:04:17,125 No, no texting. Grounded. 120 00:04:17,459 --> 00:04:19,544 You are so... 121 00:04:20,512 --> 00:04:21,694 Lame. (Mouths words) 122 00:04:21,714 --> 00:04:23,009 (Larry) Overprotective... 123 00:04:23,029 --> 00:04:24,232 Stifling. 124 00:04:24,252 --> 00:04:27,726 Hmm. Their musicals are clearly the best thing their planet has to offer. 125 00:04:27,746 --> 00:04:31,027 Just think about the other amazing things they could be holding us back from. 126 00:04:31,047 --> 00:04:32,820 If only there was a way of making them 127 00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:34,342 really hear us. 128 00:04:34,478 --> 00:04:35,947 A way of expressing our desire... 129 00:04:35,967 --> 00:04:38,780 (Up-tempo music starts) To experience new and exciting things. 130 00:04:39,318 --> 00:04:41,998 Ideally, things would rhyme. 131 00:04:42,234 --> 00:04:43,317 (Music stops, switch clicks) (Gasps) 132 00:04:43,770 --> 00:04:46,165 I've been waiting to use this thing. 133 00:04:46,885 --> 00:04:47,940 134 00:04:48,833 --> 00:04:52,424 Megan, I think we've done all the analysis we can do for a 3-letter text. 135 00:04:52,444 --> 00:04:54,638 When he said "hey," I think he might have meant "hey." 136 00:04:54,658 --> 00:04:56,834 Whoa! Whoa, whoa! What are you doing? 137 00:04:56,854 --> 00:04:58,534 Did you get your telephone from my bedroom? 138 00:04:58,554 --> 00:05:00,515 - You are grounded! - Hold on. 139 00:05:01,396 --> 00:05:02,903 You know, I thought about it, 140 00:05:02,923 --> 00:05:04,586 and I just decided no. 141 00:05:05,181 --> 00:05:06,385 I'm not grounded. 142 00:05:06,405 --> 00:05:07,651 What did you just say? 143 00:05:07,671 --> 00:05:09,041 What did she just say? 144 00:05:09,061 --> 00:05:10,406 Max, Abby, go to your rooms. 145 00:05:10,426 --> 00:05:12,317 No, actually, don't. 146 00:05:12,714 --> 00:05:16,248 You see, something occurred to me as I sat in my room... 147 00:05:16,650 --> 00:05:17,742 Unplugged. 148 00:05:17,941 --> 00:05:19,919 Parents don't have any real power. 149 00:05:19,953 --> 00:05:21,738 They can ground us, yes. 150 00:05:21,758 --> 00:05:23,984 But what if we say no? 151 00:05:24,004 --> 00:05:25,724 Can we do that? 152 00:05:25,910 --> 00:05:27,293 (Lowered voice) Don't talk. Don't breathe. 153 00:05:27,623 --> 00:05:28,544 Let this play out. 154 00:05:28,595 --> 00:05:30,891 So, anyway, Megan, uh, I think a good response 155 00:05:30,911 --> 00:05:32,898 to "hey" might just be "hey." 156 00:05:33,331 --> 00:05:33,966 (Door closes) (Gasps) 157 00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:35,046 - Did she just... - Uh-huh. 158 00:05:35,066 --> 00:05:35,940 - But I thought that we... - Yeah. 159 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:38,120 - So then how could she... - I don't know. 160 00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:41,307 161 00:05:41,611 --> 00:05:43,266 Dominique, do you think that was good? 162 00:05:43,286 --> 00:05:45,778 - Actually, I kinda do think... - It wasn't. It was terrible. 163 00:05:45,798 --> 00:05:48,284 I'm sorry. Singing isn't your thing. 164 00:05:48,304 --> 00:05:50,865 - Yeah! - (Sighs) I'm sorry, Billie Jean King. 165 00:05:50,885 --> 00:05:53,702 It was a little bit cruise ship karaoke for me. 166 00:05:55,055 --> 00:05:56,217 I'm gonna do an original song. 167 00:05:56,237 --> 00:05:57,086 - Oh... - No, not another. 168 00:05:57,106 --> 00:05:58,575 I hate it when they do that. 169 00:05:58,595 --> 00:06:00,792 I've been writing this for my girlfriend Giselle. 170 00:06:00,812 --> 00:06:01,764 (Groans) 171 00:06:01,784 --> 00:06:03,162 Giselle 172 00:06:03,373 --> 00:06:04,477 (strumming) 173 00:06:05,259 --> 00:06:06,836 You're so swell 174 00:06:06,856 --> 00:06:07,948 (strumming) 175 00:06:08,134 --> 00:06:10,786 You're a 16th the size of Adele 176 00:06:11,683 --> 00:06:13,055 (Pressing buttons) 177 00:06:15,592 --> 00:06:18,308 Amber, listen to me. You are grounded. 178 00:06:18,328 --> 00:06:19,984 I reject your grounding, Marty. 179 00:06:20,004 --> 00:06:22,391 What kind of example are you setting for your brother and your sister? 180 00:06:22,411 --> 00:06:24,153 A pretty fun one, by the looks of it. 181 00:06:25,675 --> 00:06:26,784 (Hisses) What are you doing? 182 00:06:26,804 --> 00:06:29,308 What I should have been doing a long time ago. 183 00:06:29,328 --> 00:06:30,773 Mmm! Mmm! 184 00:06:30,793 --> 00:06:32,756 (Bell dings) Abby! 185 00:06:32,790 --> 00:06:34,347 Oh, hey, Debbie. 186 00:06:34,367 --> 00:06:36,109 Fix me up a sandwich, would ya? 187 00:06:36,129 --> 00:06:38,262 Easy on the Mayo for once. 188 00:06:39,134 --> 00:06:41,479 Should have let me go to that concert. 189 00:06:42,335 --> 00:06:44,333 Oh, my God. This is it. It's a coup. 190 00:06:44,353 --> 00:06:47,185 - We do we do? - What do we do? We ignore them. 191 00:06:47,205 --> 00:06:49,706 Give them 24 hours with nothing to rebel against. 192 00:06:49,724 --> 00:06:50,991 They'll lose steam. 193 00:06:51,025 --> 00:06:52,437 (Hissing) 194 00:06:52,457 --> 00:06:54,478 (Muffled laugh) Yeah! 195 00:06:55,452 --> 00:06:56,413 (Sighs) 196 00:06:57,512 --> 00:07:00,234 (Laughs) All right, husband, are you ready for our first rehearsal? 197 00:07:00,268 --> 00:07:01,518 Am I ever. 198 00:07:02,044 --> 00:07:04,265 Up until today, I've always been a Larry bird. 199 00:07:04,285 --> 00:07:07,335 But today, I'm a Larry song bird. 200 00:07:08,179 --> 00:07:09,462 (Laughs and breathes deeply) Deep breaths. 201 00:07:09,482 --> 00:07:11,133 Don't get pitchy. (Inhales) 202 00:07:11,344 --> 00:07:13,334 (Slow theatrical music playing) 203 00:07:13,776 --> 00:07:16,199 There's so much out there we should know 204 00:07:18,221 --> 00:07:20,720 And yet you never let us go 205 00:07:22,688 --> 00:07:25,108 if we could do things 206 00:07:25,332 --> 00:07:27,447 Big spanking new things 207 00:07:28,887 --> 00:07:32,535 (both) Life would be big, bold, and bright 208 00:07:32,932 --> 00:07:37,531 as a Broadway show 209 00:07:37,551 --> 00:07:39,528 (song tempo increases, brooms whooshing) 210 00:07:40,707 --> 00:07:43,959 I want to get a circumcision 211 00:07:44,219 --> 00:07:47,575 I want to hitchhike to L.A. 212 00:07:47,595 --> 00:07:51,106 Drinking in dive bars? I'd give it five stars 213 00:07:51,126 --> 00:07:54,828 More or less like what you'd probably see on Broadway 214 00:07:54,848 --> 00:07:58,241 I want to use a public restroom 215 00:07:58,261 --> 00:08:01,151 And try all 50 shades of grey 216 00:08:01,932 --> 00:08:03,695 Roughing some bums up 217 00:08:03,715 --> 00:08:05,271 That's two big thumbs up 218 00:08:05,291 --> 00:08:10,017 Similar to the kind of thing you might see on Broadway 219 00:08:10,633 --> 00:08:13,738 I want to do a tap-dance at the local D.M.V. 220 00:08:14,195 --> 00:08:17,325 I want to give a lap dance to a Starbucks employee 221 00:08:17,806 --> 00:08:21,105 (All) What about getting a new tattoo or possibly two or three? 222 00:08:21,125 --> 00:08:24,009 I want to smack the entire cast of "glee" So do we 223 00:08:24,029 --> 00:08:25,163 Also me 224 00:08:25,183 --> 00:08:28,341 I want to learn to use a chain saw 225 00:08:28,726 --> 00:08:31,866 I want to do a dream ballet 226 00:08:32,213 --> 00:08:35,432 (all) Should you ignore us, we'll add a chorus 227 00:08:35,452 --> 00:08:37,535 Everyone form a kick line, what do you say? 228 00:08:37,555 --> 00:08:38,912 Hooray, hooray, hooray 229 00:08:38,932 --> 00:08:40,724 Life could be as wonderful 230 00:08:40,744 --> 00:08:42,337 magical adjective 231 00:08:42,357 --> 00:08:43,355 swell 232 00:08:43,375 --> 00:08:47,063 as something you may or may not possibly see 233 00:08:47,083 --> 00:08:51,029 on Broadway 234 00:08:51,712 --> 00:08:54,223 Please let us go and try new things today 235 00:08:54,243 --> 00:08:56,060 Sing out, Dick Butkus 236 00:08:56,080 --> 00:08:59,214 Make our lives as fabulous 237 00:08:59,612 --> 00:09:04,215 as Broadway 238 00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:06,422 Broadway 239 00:09:06,442 --> 00:09:08,242 Broadway 240 00:09:08,262 --> 00:09:09,893 Broadway (High-pitched shriek) 241 00:09:09,913 --> 00:09:10,311 (Music stops) 242 00:09:12,370 --> 00:09:13,958 Oh, no. 243 00:09:14,678 --> 00:09:16,527 - Dick fell in the well. - Ooh. 244 00:09:27,589 --> 00:09:29,023 Coming through, coming through. 245 00:09:29,058 --> 00:09:30,466 (Panting) 246 00:09:30,486 --> 00:09:32,737 Tie it 'round your waist, son! We'll pull you right up! 247 00:09:32,757 --> 00:09:35,459 No, don't do it, dick. It'll tear right through you! 248 00:09:35,479 --> 00:09:36,899 What are you trying to do, split him in half? 249 00:09:36,919 --> 00:09:38,942 He's tender like veal. (Sighs) 250 00:09:38,962 --> 00:09:41,590 Maybe we should just call the weavers and ask for help. 251 00:09:41,610 --> 00:09:43,538 I know. Let's call the police. 252 00:09:43,556 --> 00:09:46,015 Oh, honey, they split up in the '80s. 253 00:09:46,035 --> 00:09:47,422 Now sting's off doing his own thing... 254 00:09:47,442 --> 00:09:49,495 No. No. No, police officers. 255 00:09:49,515 --> 00:09:51,510 They'll come, rescue Dick, and we'll be back home 256 00:09:51,530 --> 00:09:53,285 before the weavers can say "I told you so." 257 00:09:53,305 --> 00:09:55,414 - Oh. - Who has a phone? 258 00:09:55,737 --> 00:09:56,784 (Murmuring) (Phone whooshes) 259 00:09:56,804 --> 00:09:58,671 Oh. Thank you, son. 260 00:09:58,691 --> 00:10:00,789 (Dick) Keep it short! Those are pre-paid minutes! 261 00:10:03,753 --> 00:10:05,490 How's it hangin', folks? 262 00:10:05,751 --> 00:10:08,635 (Sighs) Hey, Debbie, where's your copy of "Magic Mike"? 263 00:10:08,655 --> 00:10:10,124 You're not watching "Magic Mike." 264 00:10:10,144 --> 00:10:13,183 Fine. I'll illegally download it from the Internet. 265 00:10:13,203 --> 00:10:15,814 (Bell dings) I'm having a hard time ignoring this, Deb. 266 00:10:15,834 --> 00:10:18,135 Yeah, we need to put a stop to this. Where is she? 267 00:10:18,155 --> 00:10:19,636 So what are you doing now? 268 00:10:19,656 --> 00:10:21,311 I'm trying to write this song. 269 00:10:21,331 --> 00:10:24,212 Okay, well, why don't you stop trying to do that 270 00:10:24,232 --> 00:10:28,046 and come with me to the Jay-Z concert? 271 00:10:28,066 --> 00:10:29,386 Jay-Z? 272 00:10:29,406 --> 00:10:31,305 I love me some Jay-Z! 273 00:10:31,325 --> 00:10:33,345 - So are you in? - I'd love to, but 274 00:10:33,365 --> 00:10:36,113 I can't figure out this love song for Giselle. 275 00:10:36,133 --> 00:10:38,297 - Just... I can't finish it. - Huh. 276 00:10:38,317 --> 00:10:40,109 Maybe you have writer's block. 277 00:10:40,129 --> 00:10:42,404 Or maybe Giselle is just too boring to write about. 278 00:10:42,424 --> 00:10:44,257 (Sighs) So meet me in the park. 279 00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:45,642 We'll walk to Megan's house from there. 280 00:10:45,662 --> 00:10:48,595 - Be there at 7:00. - Okay. (Phone beeps) 281 00:10:48,893 --> 00:10:49,712 (Phone beeps) 282 00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:51,015 Amber, we need to talk. (Sighs) 283 00:10:51,035 --> 00:10:53,636 But first, what happened to the rug in the hallway? 284 00:10:53,656 --> 00:10:56,377 Threw it away. Never liked that thing. 285 00:10:57,024 --> 00:10:58,927 (Sirens wailing in distance) Are those sirens? 286 00:10:59,357 --> 00:11:01,007 What is going on? 287 00:11:02,075 --> 00:11:04,522 (Sirens continue wailing) 288 00:11:04,542 --> 00:11:05,775 Oh, boy. 289 00:11:05,986 --> 00:11:07,555 Amber, watch your brother and sister. 290 00:11:07,589 --> 00:11:09,341 - I'm not gonna do that. - Amber, enough! 291 00:11:09,361 --> 00:11:10,503 Fine. 292 00:11:11,049 --> 00:11:14,284 Hey. I'm making Martinis. You in? (Rattling) 293 00:11:14,713 --> 00:11:15,963 (Police radio chatter) 294 00:11:16,133 --> 00:11:18,432 Jackie, what is going on? Is everything okay? 295 00:11:18,466 --> 00:11:20,370 Oh, yes. Everything is perfectly fine. 296 00:11:20,390 --> 00:11:23,373 We were doing a musical number, and Dick fell in the well. 297 00:11:23,393 --> 00:11:26,460 What?! Dick, are you okay?! 298 00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:28,321 I'm well. Get it? 299 00:11:28,341 --> 00:11:30,493 - Stop that, Dick! - It's not punny! 300 00:11:30,513 --> 00:11:32,007 Larry, you called the police? (Police radio chatter) 301 00:11:32,027 --> 00:11:33,719 - I did. - All by himself. 302 00:11:33,739 --> 00:11:36,510 Well, how are you gonna answer their questions? 303 00:11:36,530 --> 00:11:39,576 You have no documentation, very silly names. 304 00:11:39,898 --> 00:11:41,636 All of you are dressed alike. 305 00:11:41,656 --> 00:11:43,738 You have that spaceship in your garage. 306 00:11:43,758 --> 00:11:45,736 Larry, you want this to end up like "E.T."? Huh? 307 00:11:45,756 --> 00:11:48,993 Bubble over your house, you lying naked and trapped in some drainage ditch? 308 00:11:49,013 --> 00:11:50,830 - Is that how it ended? - No. 309 00:11:50,850 --> 00:11:52,443 - I never saw the end! - It's okay. 310 00:11:52,463 --> 00:11:54,503 - You didn't tell me that. - It's not how it ended. 311 00:11:54,523 --> 00:11:56,198 (Horn honks) 312 00:11:56,322 --> 00:11:57,872 Oh, great, here we go. (Van door slides open) 313 00:11:59,098 --> 00:12:00,624 I got eyes on the well! (Panting) 314 00:12:02,175 --> 00:12:03,868 Are you the boy's father? 315 00:12:03,888 --> 00:12:04,464 Um... 316 00:12:04,484 --> 00:12:06,027 Sir, please tell us your name. 317 00:12:06,047 --> 00:12:07,127 (Shudders) 318 00:12:07,663 --> 00:12:09,685 (Lowered voice) Larry Bird. 319 00:12:10,256 --> 00:12:12,378 And your son's name in the well? 320 00:12:12,875 --> 00:12:14,455 Dick Butkus. 321 00:12:15,022 --> 00:12:16,039 (Chuckles nervously) 322 00:12:16,238 --> 00:12:19,140 - Larry Bird and Dick Butkus? - Butkus. 323 00:12:19,160 --> 00:12:20,897 (Pants) We chose those names because we... 324 00:12:20,917 --> 00:12:24,498 we wanted to honor earth's finest physical specimens. 325 00:12:25,533 --> 00:12:26,667 (Panting) 326 00:12:26,687 --> 00:12:28,628 We don't have a spaceship in the garage. 327 00:12:28,648 --> 00:12:30,321 This is "E.T." It's happening. 328 00:12:30,341 --> 00:12:32,108 (Sighs) The whole thing is happening right now. 329 00:12:32,128 --> 00:12:34,367 (Larry) Oh, my God. It is "E.T." 330 00:12:34,387 --> 00:12:35,603 (Panting) 331 00:12:36,223 --> 00:12:38,139 (Yelps) 332 00:12:38,159 --> 00:12:40,013 (Crowd gasps) Ooh! (Thud) 333 00:12:40,901 --> 00:12:42,253 Did you get that? 334 00:12:42,613 --> 00:12:43,742 Okay. 335 00:12:51,869 --> 00:12:53,202 This is so exciting. 336 00:12:53,220 --> 00:12:54,587 A kid in a well. 337 00:12:54,622 --> 00:12:56,457 If I had to do one more teeth-whitening segment, 338 00:12:56,477 --> 00:12:57,872 I'd blow my brains out. (Closes compact) 339 00:12:57,892 --> 00:13:00,155 Ooh, teeth-whitening. Wow! 340 00:13:00,340 --> 00:13:02,193 Don't you think your viewers would like to hear about that 341 00:13:02,213 --> 00:13:05,494 - instead of this silly old well story? - I've got this, Debbie Weaver. 342 00:13:05,514 --> 00:13:08,592 I've watched plenty of your TV. I can handle the media. 343 00:13:10,292 --> 00:13:11,378 Hi. 344 00:13:11,874 --> 00:13:14,133 I'm Jackie Joyner-Kersee. 345 00:13:14,505 --> 00:13:16,793 If you could tell the greater New Jersey area 346 00:13:16,813 --> 00:13:19,382 one thing about your son, what would it be? 347 00:13:21,498 --> 00:13:22,930 He does not have a tail. 348 00:13:22,950 --> 00:13:25,747 Yeah, you know, he's just like any other 8-year-old kid. 349 00:13:25,767 --> 00:13:28,998 I noticed all the people in this neighborhood dress the same. 350 00:13:29,018 --> 00:13:32,326 Is this, like, some kind of commune or a cult? (Debbie laughs) 351 00:13:32,346 --> 00:13:34,212 What?! It's... 352 00:13:34,232 --> 00:13:36,454 It's not a commune. 353 00:13:37,285 --> 00:13:38,181 (Laughs) 354 00:13:39,779 --> 00:13:40,996 No! 355 00:13:41,349 --> 00:13:42,492 (Continues laughing) 356 00:13:42,777 --> 00:13:45,296 I lied. He does have a tail. 357 00:13:45,316 --> 00:13:46,661 Oh, no. 358 00:13:47,039 --> 00:13:48,771 (Guitar strumming ballad) 359 00:13:57,299 --> 00:14:00,134 There's so much I'm feeling 360 00:14:01,530 --> 00:14:03,904 More th m you can tell 361 00:14:06,201 --> 00:14:10,428 So much going on beneath this 362 00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:12,897 shell 363 00:14:13,757 --> 00:14:17,084 I can't keep it hidden 364 00:14:18,101 --> 00:14:21,228 I can feel it swell 365 00:14:22,618 --> 00:14:25,439 Gotta let it ring out 366 00:14:25,873 --> 00:14:27,131 like a 367 00:14:27,151 --> 00:14:28,827 bell 368 00:14:30,787 --> 00:14:32,177 Giselle 369 00:14:35,407 --> 00:14:37,169 Giselle 370 00:14:40,036 --> 00:14:44,838 I can't stop thinking about 371 00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:48,065 (Stops strumming) 372 00:14:49,653 --> 00:14:50,785 Amber 373 00:14:52,346 --> 00:14:54,088 (man) All right, boys, the winch is almost ready. 374 00:14:54,108 --> 00:14:56,124 What's going on up there? 375 00:14:56,360 --> 00:14:58,531 It appears all is lost. 376 00:15:00,515 --> 00:15:03,062 Why are you smiling, father? 377 00:15:03,096 --> 00:15:05,314 Because this is the low point. 378 00:15:05,454 --> 00:15:08,239 And if I've learned anything from musicals, 379 00:15:08,259 --> 00:15:10,736 it's right after the lowest point, 380 00:15:10,770 --> 00:15:12,838 everything turns around. 381 00:15:13,626 --> 00:15:16,100 The main song is reprised, 382 00:15:16,120 --> 00:15:19,637 but with a new, potentially opposite message 383 00:15:19,657 --> 00:15:21,431 to the first song. 384 00:15:23,826 --> 00:15:27,086 So let's pause briefly to recap 385 00:15:27,661 --> 00:15:30,553 This world's a scary tourist trap 386 00:15:32,029 --> 00:15:34,325 Shallow Offensive 387 00:15:34,345 --> 00:15:36,703 Much too expensive 388 00:15:37,720 --> 00:15:41,113 In short, exactly the same 389 00:15:41,133 --> 00:15:44,154 as that Broadway 390 00:15:44,762 --> 00:15:45,822 crap 391 00:15:45,842 --> 00:15:46,735 (clatters) 392 00:15:48,584 --> 00:15:50,227 I think today we learned a lesson 393 00:15:50,247 --> 00:15:52,386 I guess I've learned my lesson 394 00:15:52,406 --> 00:15:54,180 Life's not some whimsical souffle 395 00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:56,638 I guess I really fell 396 00:15:56,658 --> 00:15:58,499 it's horrifying 397 00:15:58,519 --> 00:16:01,304 and ends in crying fell just like Dick Butkus in the well 398 00:16:01,324 --> 00:16:04,601 not unlike those lies they try to sell you on Broadway 399 00:16:04,621 --> 00:16:07,182 it's dumb and cheesy and depressing 400 00:16:07,202 --> 00:16:08,356 Amber 401 00:16:08,376 --> 00:16:10,701 It's just a badly plotted play 402 00:16:10,721 --> 00:16:12,451 Oh, Amber 403 00:16:12,471 --> 00:16:14,481 So, thank you, Weavers Amber 404 00:16:14,501 --> 00:16:16,951 We're now believers 405 00:16:16,971 --> 00:16:18,643 Home is where we'll stay, far from the lights 406 00:16:18,663 --> 00:16:19,743 And temptations 407 00:16:19,763 --> 00:16:22,572 And the dangers And the wells 408 00:16:22,592 --> 00:16:30,461 (all) of Broadway 409 00:16:32,136 --> 00:16:33,182 Hey 410 00:16:33,526 --> 00:16:35,184 - Hey. - Hey. 411 00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:39,956 Oh, my God. I'm still in love with Amber. 412 00:16:39,990 --> 00:16:41,324 I have to tell her. 413 00:16:41,577 --> 00:16:43,526 I have to sing a song for her. 414 00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:44,927 (Engine rumbling) 415 00:16:44,962 --> 00:16:47,731 Excuse me. So that's it. You're just leaving, right? 416 00:16:48,016 --> 00:16:50,677 Yeah. Once the kid's out of the well, story's over. 417 00:16:50,697 --> 00:16:52,588 Well, what about the story? 418 00:16:52,608 --> 00:16:55,405 Oh, yeah. My boss looked at it, and he hated it, 419 00:16:55,425 --> 00:16:57,566 so I guess it's back to doing traffic. 420 00:16:57,586 --> 00:16:59,684 And my boss. Hmm. 421 00:17:00,341 --> 00:17:01,587 You know, I like her. 422 00:17:01,607 --> 00:17:02,791 - No, you don't. - I don't like her. 423 00:17:02,811 --> 00:17:04,143 No. 424 00:17:05,429 --> 00:17:06,663 (Song ends) 425 00:17:06,683 --> 00:17:09,081 (Sighs) So I guess we got in a little over our heads. 426 00:17:09,101 --> 00:17:11,725 About 14 feet over, am I right? 427 00:17:11,745 --> 00:17:13,698 (Chuckles) Good one, husband. 428 00:17:13,718 --> 00:17:16,266 Oh, we pushed too far too fast. 429 00:17:16,286 --> 00:17:18,555 Maybe we do need a little more guidance than we thought. 430 00:17:18,575 --> 00:17:20,628 I know you'll be happy to hear that from now on, 431 00:17:20,648 --> 00:17:23,246 we'll stay at home and live vicariously 432 00:17:23,266 --> 00:17:25,959 through "3rd rock from the sun" reruns. 433 00:17:26,301 --> 00:17:27,828 Well, we don't want that. 434 00:17:27,848 --> 00:17:29,826 No, we want you to experience the world. 435 00:17:29,846 --> 00:17:31,911 It's just that we worry about you. 436 00:17:31,931 --> 00:17:35,063 You know, we want you to be safe as well as happy. 437 00:17:35,224 --> 00:17:36,912 You guys, you're... 438 00:17:37,843 --> 00:17:39,830 well, I guess you're like our E.T. 439 00:17:40,294 --> 00:17:41,732 (Clicks tongue) Oh... 440 00:17:41,766 --> 00:17:42,677 (Exhales) 441 00:17:42,697 --> 00:17:45,871 Well, I suppose that would make you our elliott. 442 00:17:45,891 --> 00:17:46,809 (Laughs) We'll take it. 443 00:17:46,829 --> 00:17:49,190 I love that movie. I always wanted to be Elliott. 444 00:17:49,897 --> 00:17:52,541 So, um... Elliott, 445 00:17:52,561 --> 00:17:55,064 there's a monster truck rally this Sunday Sunday Sunday. 446 00:17:55,084 --> 00:17:56,715 Will you take us? 447 00:17:56,735 --> 00:17:58,055 (Imitating E.T.) Please? 448 00:17:58,075 --> 00:17:59,241 - Yes, I'll take you. - Oh! 449 00:17:59,261 --> 00:18:00,179 - Let's do this. - Okay. 450 00:18:00,199 --> 00:18:01,268 - All right. - Good night. 451 00:18:01,303 --> 00:18:03,145 - Good night. - (Marty) Sunday Sunday Sunday! 452 00:18:03,165 --> 00:18:04,907 - Honey, you should come, though. - No, I'm not coming. 453 00:18:04,927 --> 00:18:07,141 (Laughing) Guys, guys, guys, come on, stop! 454 00:18:07,161 --> 00:18:09,101 It's been four hours of this. 455 00:18:09,121 --> 00:18:11,357 Abby, are you wearing my makeup? I told you no. 456 00:18:11,377 --> 00:18:14,670 Yeah, I know, but something occurred to us. 457 00:18:14,690 --> 00:18:17,686 We can say no. You don't have any real power. 458 00:18:17,706 --> 00:18:18,987 But I do. 459 00:18:19,905 --> 00:18:20,957 Look. 460 00:18:20,977 --> 00:18:24,906 There's an unspoken bargain between parent and child. 461 00:18:25,341 --> 00:18:28,387 And if you are not going to live up to your end of the bargain, 462 00:18:28,407 --> 00:18:30,162 then we don't have to, either. 463 00:18:30,182 --> 00:18:32,830 (Exhales) So here's what goes... Christmas, 464 00:18:32,850 --> 00:18:35,424 birthdays, help with homework, 465 00:18:35,444 --> 00:18:37,614 vaccines, food, 466 00:18:37,634 --> 00:18:38,925 the warmth of a mother, 467 00:18:38,945 --> 00:18:41,176 the warmth of a heater in January. 468 00:18:41,196 --> 00:18:43,839 All these things could potentially disappear, 469 00:18:43,859 --> 00:18:45,680 or you could go back to following the rules 470 00:18:45,700 --> 00:18:49,556 and have some semblance of your happy little lives. 471 00:18:49,780 --> 00:18:51,968 Do you understand? 472 00:18:53,292 --> 00:18:54,743 Can I get a "yes, ma'am"? 473 00:18:54,763 --> 00:18:55,952 (Max and Abby) Yes, ma'am. 474 00:18:55,972 --> 00:18:57,419 Okay, now go to your rooms and get ready for bed. 475 00:18:57,439 --> 00:19:00,157 You're grounded. I'm gonna count to three. 476 00:19:00,442 --> 00:19:01,511 One... (Panting) 477 00:19:04,686 --> 00:19:07,044 (Lowered voice) I don't know what I would have done if I got to three. 478 00:19:07,064 --> 00:19:07,801 Mmm. 479 00:19:10,550 --> 00:19:12,115 And what about you? 480 00:19:12,135 --> 00:19:13,728 Are we done here? 481 00:19:14,172 --> 00:19:15,428 Yes. 482 00:19:15,626 --> 00:19:17,798 For the record, I would just like to say 483 00:19:17,818 --> 00:19:21,657 that I didn't go behind your back at first. 484 00:19:22,191 --> 00:19:25,231 I did all my homework. I was going with a parent. 485 00:19:25,251 --> 00:19:28,319 I do everything right, and you still don't trust me. 486 00:19:29,425 --> 00:19:32,583 I guess it is a little shawshanky around here. 487 00:19:33,024 --> 00:19:35,593 Maybe we can loosen the reins a little. 488 00:19:36,219 --> 00:19:37,435 Thank you. 489 00:19:38,006 --> 00:19:39,496 I crossed a weird line today. 490 00:19:39,514 --> 00:19:42,304 Turned the little ones into animals. (Simon Lynge) Give me love 491 00:19:42,324 --> 00:19:44,018 take my phone. I'm grounding myself. 492 00:19:44,038 --> 00:19:45,441 Give me love 493 00:19:45,461 --> 00:19:47,754 I already grounded you. and I'll bring it back to you 494 00:19:47,774 --> 00:19:49,467 Whatever you need to tell yourself, Deb. 495 00:19:49,487 --> 00:19:51,907 Give me love 496 00:19:52,378 --> 00:19:54,345 Give me love 497 00:19:54,872 --> 00:19:57,925 and I'll bring it back to you 498 00:20:00,779 --> 00:20:01,736 (Gasps softly) 499 00:20:03,248 --> 00:20:04,855 (Crickets chirping) 500 00:20:04,875 --> 00:20:05,664 (Sighs) 501 00:20:05,684 --> 00:20:08,804 (Male sportscaster speaking indistinctly on TV) 502 00:20:11,397 --> 00:20:13,030 (Vibrating) 503 00:20:15,090 --> 00:20:16,547 (Line ringing) It's Amber. Whatever. 504 00:20:16,567 --> 00:20:17,676 (Tone beeps) 505 00:20:17,696 --> 00:20:19,979 Hello, Amber. It's Reggie. 506 00:20:21,071 --> 00:20:23,918 I don't know why you didn't come tonight, but... 507 00:20:23,938 --> 00:20:26,988 Maybe you found someone else to go to the concert with. 508 00:20:28,626 --> 00:20:30,673 I kind of wanted to talk to you. 509 00:20:34,520 --> 00:20:36,668 But never mind. Maybe it's not that important. 510 00:20:36,688 --> 00:20:39,170 Give me love 511 00:20:39,592 --> 00:20:41,602 Give me love 512 00:20:42,173 --> 00:20:44,531 and I'll bring it back to you 513 00:20:46,454 --> 00:20:50,170 - Father? - Don't tell the weavers I'm back down here. 514 00:20:56,990 --> 00:20:58,067 I don't know if this will work. 515 00:20:58,087 --> 00:20:59,809 That fence is pretty high. 516 00:20:59,829 --> 00:21:01,919 You can do it. You're an alien. 517 00:21:01,939 --> 00:21:03,433 You just have to focus. 518 00:21:03,453 --> 00:21:06,126 We're flying over that fence and across the moon. 519 00:21:06,146 --> 00:21:08,325 Oh, what the hell. What's the worst that could happen? 520 00:21:08,345 --> 00:21:10,169 Absolutely not! 521 00:21:10,442 --> 00:21:13,102 But, mom, Dick says he can do this! 522 00:21:13,122 --> 00:21:15,187 Okay, being grounded means no TV, 523 00:21:15,207 --> 00:21:18,982 no video games, no flying with aliens. 524 00:21:19,230 --> 00:21:20,781 (Sighs) Fine! 525 00:21:21,129 --> 00:21:22,879 I can't believe you, Max. 526 00:21:22,978 --> 00:21:24,355 Really? 527 00:21:24,541 --> 00:21:25,785 (Crickets chirping) 528 00:21:27,247 --> 00:21:28,753 (Lowered voice) Come on, Dick. 529 00:21:29,091 --> 00:21:30,828 We can do this. 530 00:21:30,977 --> 00:21:32,124 (Dramatic music playing) 531 00:21:32,144 --> 00:21:34,191 Come on, Dick! You can do this! Whoo! 532 00:21:35,023 --> 00:21:36,896 (Loud thud) Aah! (Sighs) Ohh! 533 00:21:36,916 --> 00:21:38,684 That didn't work. 534 00:21:39,159 --> 00:21:41,542 www.addic7ed.com 535 00:21:41,592 --> 00:21:46,142 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 39100

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