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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:08,000 Subtitles - Ripped (and Hacked) by RavyDavy - Part of the [RL] Crew 2 00:00:37,327 --> 00:00:39,602 Smoking makes you dead. 3 00:00:39,647 --> 00:00:43,720 It means you get all black inside and swell up like a whale, 4 00:00:43,767 --> 00:00:45,598 and explode in hospital. 5 00:00:45,647 --> 00:00:48,366 Daddy says criminals and bad people smoke. 6 00:00:48,407 --> 00:00:51,240 Timmy? He's not bothering you, is he? 7 00:00:51,287 --> 00:00:54,006 Not at all, no, but no ice cream in the shop. 8 00:00:54,047 --> 00:00:58,199 - I don't have an ice cream. - I think Timmy's telling a naughty fib. 9 00:01:00,047 --> 00:01:03,756 For goodness' sake. Outside, now! 10 00:01:03,807 --> 00:01:05,798 No books for you. 11 00:01:05,847 --> 00:01:08,281 - I'm so sorry. - Not at all. 12 00:01:08,327 --> 00:01:11,637 "'My, what a lovely carrot,' said the hippo. 13 00:01:11,687 --> 00:01:16,158 'Yes, but is it organic?' Said the fussy rabbit in a squeaky voice." 14 00:01:16,207 --> 00:01:20,485 Oh, sorry. (Squeaky voice) "'Yes, but is it organic? ' said the..." 15 00:01:23,087 --> 00:01:25,681 - Bernard. Bernard! - What? 16 00:01:25,727 --> 00:01:29,640 It's hot in the worm. Can I have a break? 17 00:01:29,687 --> 00:01:33,157 You'd shatter the magic for the lovely children, 18 00:01:33,207 --> 00:01:35,926 so no, certainly not. 19 00:01:35,967 --> 00:01:38,606 "'No, it's not organic,' said the hippo. 20 00:01:38,647 --> 00:01:42,322 'Oh, I don't want it then,' said the fussy rabbit." Ow. 21 00:01:42,367 --> 00:01:44,961 Ow! Look, it's a real beard, I told you! 22 00:01:47,047 --> 00:01:50,722 I'm finished. They're picking me up for the hen night. 23 00:01:50,767 --> 00:01:54,555 A big, old house in the country. It'll be brilliant. 24 00:01:54,607 --> 00:01:58,282 I doubt it, since your night begins with the word "hen", prefix of doom... 25 00:01:58,327 --> 00:02:02,286 It'll be great - all the old school gang back together. 26 00:02:02,327 --> 00:02:05,683 - I thought you hated school? - I never said that. 27 00:02:05,727 --> 00:02:08,799 I just look at your life now and work backwards. 28 00:02:09,647 --> 00:02:12,525 - Bernard. - You haven't finished, worm! 29 00:02:12,567 --> 00:02:14,762 What happened to the rabbit? 30 00:02:14,807 --> 00:02:17,241 He... starved to death. The end. 31 00:02:18,247 --> 00:02:21,637 Look, I could write a better kids' book than this. 32 00:02:21,687 --> 00:02:26,920 Pretty pictures, simple story, something for the little tykes to really enjoy. 33 00:02:26,967 --> 00:02:31,518 See the film, collect the stickers, play the Xbox game, eat the yoghurt. 34 00:02:31,567 --> 00:02:34,843 It'll be my gift to children-kind everywhere. 35 00:02:34,887 --> 00:02:38,004 Everyone thinks they could write one. It's not that easy. 36 00:02:38,047 --> 00:02:40,003 It is. They go for any old rubbish. 37 00:02:40,047 --> 00:02:45,485 - Children are actually very discerning. - They're not, they lap up any old gumph. 38 00:02:45,527 --> 00:02:50,203 Not gumph! Let's write a children's classic. You and me, together! 39 00:02:50,247 --> 00:02:54,525 - You two could never do it. - We could! Before you even get back. 40 00:02:54,567 --> 00:02:58,321 OK. By tomorrow. A million billion pounds says you have nothing. 41 00:02:58,367 --> 00:03:01,837 Oh, the old million billion. Make it interesting - say 50? 42 00:03:12,687 --> 00:03:15,155 Oh, Fran, you forgot your bag! 43 00:03:17,207 --> 00:03:19,198 (Grunts) 44 00:03:21,767 --> 00:03:24,406 (Fran) Look, there it is (Woman) Oh, fantastic! 45 00:03:24,447 --> 00:03:26,438 (Fran) Let's make a huge dinner. 46 00:03:26,487 --> 00:03:29,638 (Woman) No, don't let me eat! Chain me to the radiator. 47 00:03:29,687 --> 00:03:31,882 (Fran) Oh, yeah, yeah! Come on! Oh! 48 00:03:35,767 --> 00:03:38,076 - Now... booze. - Oh, yes. 49 00:03:41,167 --> 00:03:42,998 Oh. Is that enough? 50 00:03:47,047 --> 00:03:49,277 Oh, great, we've got loads! 51 00:03:49,327 --> 00:03:53,400 (Continues unloading bottles) 52 00:03:57,727 --> 00:03:59,877 Did you bring anything else, Dr Death? 53 00:04:02,607 --> 00:04:05,997 - Just this. - Oh, my God. Life Cry. 54 00:04:06,047 --> 00:04:09,164 I haven't seen that since our school reunion. 55 00:04:09,207 --> 00:04:12,563 (Sighs) You always know you're in for a good night 56 00:04:12,607 --> 00:04:15,883 when there's a polar bear bleeding on the label. 57 00:04:22,367 --> 00:04:27,760 Manny, we haven't written anything! You're not pulling your weight. 58 00:04:27,807 --> 00:04:30,924 Manny? Agree with me when I'm talking to you! 59 00:04:33,287 --> 00:04:35,278 Manny? 60 00:04:36,487 --> 00:04:39,126 - Manny? - (Thud) 61 00:04:41,567 --> 00:04:43,558 - Manny? - Hello? 62 00:04:45,647 --> 00:04:47,638 Back in the worm. 63 00:04:47,687 --> 00:04:50,201 - I don't want to. - Back in the worm! 64 00:04:50,247 --> 00:04:54,320 I've been ready to write for ages, I've been waiting for you. 65 00:04:54,367 --> 00:04:57,484 - Well, I've been waiting for you. - I'm ready. 66 00:04:57,527 --> 00:04:59,518 Well, I'm ready. 67 00:05:00,527 --> 00:05:02,518 Let's start then. Come on. 68 00:05:07,687 --> 00:05:09,678 (Clears throat) 69 00:05:31,487 --> 00:05:35,719 - We should do some research! - So we know what we're up against! 70 00:05:35,767 --> 00:05:37,758 Yeah. 71 00:05:37,807 --> 00:05:39,798 Here we go. 72 00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:43,958 (Manny) Hmm. 73 00:05:44,007 --> 00:05:48,000 - Hmph! Ha! - (Laughs) Look at... 74 00:05:48,047 --> 00:05:51,323 I hadn't realised the competition was this bad. 75 00:05:51,367 --> 00:05:56,839 This is drivel. Ball, duck, umbrella. On and on it goes. 76 00:05:56,887 --> 00:05:58,843 With no hint of plot. 77 00:05:58,887 --> 00:06:03,085 Precisely. Now we know just how easy it's gonna be. 78 00:06:03,127 --> 00:06:05,243 Yeah. 79 00:06:05,287 --> 00:06:07,437 All right, then. Get that... 80 00:06:07,487 --> 00:06:09,478 Ha! Right. 81 00:06:24,607 --> 00:06:28,043 - We have to think about children. - Absolutely! 82 00:06:28,087 --> 00:06:32,842 - Let us consider the modern child. - Yes. 83 00:06:32,887 --> 00:06:35,401 What do they want in a book? 84 00:06:36,407 --> 00:06:38,443 Who cares? 85 00:06:38,487 --> 00:06:41,638 We have to write for ourselves as children. 86 00:06:41,687 --> 00:06:46,522 You know, when innocence was legal. When summers seemed to go on forever. 87 00:06:46,567 --> 00:06:51,118 A-A-And you'd cycle miles just to tell a friend you'd seen a frog. 88 00:06:51,167 --> 00:06:55,524 (Chuckles) When you could play in your back yard with any old thing. 89 00:06:55,567 --> 00:06:58,923 All I needed was a... was a breeze block. 90 00:06:59,807 --> 00:07:02,958 And... and a bit of an old bone. 91 00:07:03,807 --> 00:07:06,196 I bet you could make whole worlds? 92 00:07:06,247 --> 00:07:11,719 Oh, I could! One minute I'd be laying siege to a castle with a bit of an old bone 93 00:07:11,767 --> 00:07:15,680 and the next minute I'd be setting sail on a Spanish galleon 94 00:07:15,727 --> 00:07:17,718 towards a breeze block. 95 00:07:18,887 --> 00:07:22,323 - Mm. Come on, let's start. - Yes. 96 00:07:22,367 --> 00:07:25,996 Right. Here we go. 97 00:07:26,047 --> 00:07:28,038 Ah. Right... 98 00:07:36,527 --> 00:07:41,476 I'm so happy for you and your lovely fiancé. 99 00:07:41,527 --> 00:07:44,166 - (Whispers) Mark... - (AIl) Ahh... 100 00:07:44,207 --> 00:07:47,119 Now, speeches. 101 00:07:48,287 --> 00:07:51,040 Now, Becky... I love you. 102 00:07:51,087 --> 00:07:53,555 - (AIl) Ahh... - Don't interrupt! 103 00:07:54,447 --> 00:07:57,598 Look, we have known each other for a long time. 104 00:07:57,647 --> 00:07:59,797 - (Belches) - But what's time? 105 00:07:59,847 --> 00:08:02,645 There's no such thing, there's only love. 106 00:08:02,687 --> 00:08:05,076 - Ahh... - Don't interrupt! 107 00:08:06,247 --> 00:08:08,841 I love you, all the time. 108 00:08:10,247 --> 00:08:12,238 I would like to say... 109 00:08:12,287 --> 00:08:15,996 No, brides don't say. Right... 110 00:08:17,127 --> 00:08:20,676 - Eat cake. - Ahh. 111 00:08:23,847 --> 00:08:26,042 (Cheering) 112 00:08:26,087 --> 00:08:28,999 - ( Bananarama: Venus) - Barmanararmba! 113 00:08:30,167 --> 00:08:32,886 ♪ Burning like a silver flame 114 00:08:34,007 --> 00:08:37,044 ♪ The summit of beauty and love 115 00:08:37,767 --> 00:08:39,803 ♪ And Venus was her name... ♪ 116 00:08:42,007 --> 00:08:46,125 (Sighs) Manny Bianco, nul points. My go. 117 00:08:46,167 --> 00:08:48,397 (Phone) 118 00:08:49,487 --> 00:08:52,399 - Hello. - Wah-hey! 119 00:08:52,447 --> 00:08:54,119 Oh, hello. 120 00:08:54,167 --> 00:08:59,195 Just thought you'd want to hear the sound of four girls having the best time. 121 00:08:59,927 --> 00:09:02,441 (Cheering) 122 00:09:02,487 --> 00:09:05,877 Yeah, yeah, I bet you're crying on the inside. 123 00:09:05,927 --> 00:09:09,556 - How's the book coming? - Brilliant. Very well. 124 00:09:10,767 --> 00:09:15,158 - Fran, come and dance! - I'm just listening to Bernard lying! 125 00:09:15,207 --> 00:09:19,962 And remember, £100, and I want cash, not forged book tokens this time. 126 00:09:21,807 --> 00:09:24,082 Becky! Tell me you're happy. 127 00:09:24,127 --> 00:09:26,766 I'm so happy, and any more would be bad. 128 00:09:26,807 --> 00:09:30,561 Well, it gets better... for now is the time... 129 00:09:30,607 --> 00:09:33,804 - for Life Cry. - No, Fran, no more. 130 00:09:33,847 --> 00:09:36,441 But yes, and we shall play a game. 131 00:09:36,487 --> 00:09:38,876 - No, no games... - Games! 132 00:09:38,927 --> 00:09:41,316 - (Music stops) - Remember this? 133 00:09:41,367 --> 00:09:44,962 It's time for a nice game of... Truth. 134 00:09:45,007 --> 00:09:47,282 Oh, I hate that. 135 00:09:47,327 --> 00:09:50,637 Maybe you'll enjoy it more after some more cake. 136 00:09:50,687 --> 00:09:55,078 - No, no more cake, please. - Games! Cake! Booze! Truth! 137 00:09:57,527 --> 00:10:00,200 - We can't let her win. Come on, to work. - Right. 138 00:10:01,087 --> 00:10:06,684 - OK. OK. - Here we go. Er, book for... 139 00:10:06,727 --> 00:10:08,718 - Kids. - Kids. 140 00:10:08,767 --> 00:10:12,999 All right, let's just, you know, get some ideas bouncing around. 141 00:10:13,047 --> 00:10:16,278 - Go crazy, no rules... - Anything goes. 142 00:10:16,327 --> 00:10:18,841 No, not anything goes! I said no rules! 143 00:10:24,047 --> 00:10:26,686 - Hit me, hit me. - Right. Something... 144 00:10:26,727 --> 00:10:28,922 er... with a... a fox! 145 00:10:29,647 --> 00:10:31,638 No. 146 00:10:32,607 --> 00:10:34,598 Right. Er... Ah! 147 00:10:34,647 --> 00:10:37,957 What about a London pigeon? 148 00:10:38,007 --> 00:10:41,966 No, that's terrible, that makes me cringe. No, no, no, no. 149 00:10:43,007 --> 00:10:47,285 Something, you know, something... How about... how about... 150 00:10:47,327 --> 00:10:51,161 How about a mouse? Now we're getting somewhere! A mouse. 151 00:10:53,367 --> 00:10:57,645 Now, who is this mouse? Where is he from, where's he going? 152 00:10:57,687 --> 00:10:59,678 Where does he live? 153 00:10:59,727 --> 00:11:01,718 Er, he lives... he lives... 154 00:11:01,767 --> 00:11:04,839 This had better be good. It better be perfect. 155 00:11:04,887 --> 00:11:08,038 He lives in a... bottle bank! 156 00:11:11,127 --> 00:11:13,357 Oh-ho! Brilliant! Fabulous! 157 00:11:13,407 --> 00:11:17,161 Er, and, er, he... he plays the trombone! 158 00:11:17,207 --> 00:11:19,198 Keep going. 159 00:11:19,247 --> 00:11:21,761 And, er, he only eats... 160 00:11:21,807 --> 00:11:25,482 - liquorice! - Manny, this is solid gold. Solid gold! 161 00:11:26,127 --> 00:11:28,880 His... his best friend is a panda! 162 00:11:28,927 --> 00:11:31,521 No! No! No! 163 00:11:33,367 --> 00:11:35,676 Awful! Bilge! 164 00:11:35,727 --> 00:11:38,446 Child poison! You stay away from the story. 165 00:11:38,487 --> 00:11:43,436 I'll deal with the plot. You can... do pictures as I hand you the pages. 166 00:11:44,487 --> 00:11:46,557 Something bright and idiotic. 167 00:11:47,567 --> 00:11:51,560 And I will co-write this with myself. 168 00:11:55,247 --> 00:11:57,238 - Huh? Huh? - Ah. 169 00:11:57,287 --> 00:11:59,278 Ah-ha-ha. 170 00:11:59,807 --> 00:12:02,241 Yah! 171 00:12:02,287 --> 00:12:04,323 Hah-hah. Huh? 172 00:12:05,207 --> 00:12:07,198 That's rubbish! 173 00:12:07,527 --> 00:12:09,518 Start again! 174 00:12:20,407 --> 00:12:22,398 So what do you think? 175 00:12:22,447 --> 00:12:24,802 It's, erm, it's brilliant. 176 00:12:25,487 --> 00:12:29,446 Er, it might be a little long at a 1,030 pages. 177 00:12:30,407 --> 00:12:36,516 Well, we could lose about a page and a half but the rest is totally essential. 178 00:12:37,367 --> 00:12:42,680 The plot's... interesting. Might be a little complex for the three to sixes. 179 00:12:44,167 --> 00:12:46,158 It couldn't be simpler. 180 00:12:46,207 --> 00:12:49,995 There's the academic who survived the Stalinist purges 181 00:12:50,047 --> 00:12:52,880 and is now having flashbacks to that time. 182 00:12:52,927 --> 00:12:57,125 His daughter, whose long marriage is collapsing around her, 183 00:12:57,167 --> 00:13:00,716 and the journalist who suspects the academic was never in Russia, 184 00:13:00,767 --> 00:13:03,406 who falls obsessively in love with the daughter 185 00:13:03,447 --> 00:13:06,917 and sacrifices his career to become a lens grinder in Omsk. 186 00:13:06,967 --> 00:13:12,200 I mean... what's the problem? I don't think we should talk down to children. 187 00:13:12,247 --> 00:13:17,640 It's... Bernard, it's brilliant. It is. It's so good. I mean, I'm excited - 188 00:13:17,687 --> 00:13:22,522 I'm very excited about how excited everybody will be when they see it. 189 00:13:22,567 --> 00:13:24,558 It is exciting. 190 00:13:24,607 --> 00:13:28,680 I just have two teeny-weeny suggestions for changes. 191 00:13:29,687 --> 00:13:32,326 - Which are? - Well... 192 00:13:32,367 --> 00:13:34,961 instead of... the, er, 193 00:13:35,007 --> 00:13:38,363 academic and the journalist and the daughter, 194 00:13:38,407 --> 00:13:42,798 erm, perhaps it could be about... an elephant? 195 00:13:45,647 --> 00:13:48,115 - An elephant? - That's right. 196 00:13:49,207 --> 00:13:51,243 I see. 197 00:13:51,287 --> 00:13:53,482 What's your other suggestion? 198 00:13:53,527 --> 00:13:59,318 Well, instead of the Stalinist purges and the divorce and the investigation, 199 00:13:59,367 --> 00:14:03,997 erm, it could be about... Iosing a balloon. 200 00:14:10,367 --> 00:14:12,722 An elephant who loses his balloon? 201 00:14:13,887 --> 00:14:16,117 That's it. 202 00:14:17,727 --> 00:14:19,718 (Mouths) 203 00:14:19,767 --> 00:14:22,725 - But still my story in essence? - Oh, yes. 204 00:14:22,767 --> 00:14:24,758 - My vision. - Completely. 205 00:14:26,687 --> 00:14:29,076 Yes, all right, let's do that then! Come on! 206 00:14:36,527 --> 00:14:38,722 Oh, look, it's me again. 207 00:14:38,767 --> 00:14:42,999 Here's one. Tanya, I told Hugh Conti, remember, 208 00:14:43,047 --> 00:14:46,517 that you were the one who gave him crabs. 209 00:14:48,967 --> 00:14:51,401 You wouldn't do that. 210 00:14:52,967 --> 00:14:57,802 - Why did you do that? - He was really itchy! 211 00:15:00,127 --> 00:15:02,641 (Cackling) 212 00:15:03,287 --> 00:15:05,278 Who's next? 213 00:15:05,327 --> 00:15:07,966 I can't believe you kissed my dad. 214 00:15:08,007 --> 00:15:12,876 Why didn't you tell us you were the one stealing clothes from college? 215 00:15:12,927 --> 00:15:15,521 - We were freaked out! - I was young. 216 00:15:15,567 --> 00:15:20,322 - Have you still got my dress? - No. I made it into toilet curtains. 217 00:15:21,967 --> 00:15:26,563 As we're playing Truth, Fran, I think you're a bit jealous. 218 00:15:26,607 --> 00:15:30,600 That's why you got us pissed and made us play your stupid game, 219 00:15:30,647 --> 00:15:33,957 - to bring us down to your level. - Who am I jealous of? 220 00:15:34,007 --> 00:15:36,202 - I've got a career. - (Scoffs) 221 00:15:36,247 --> 00:15:38,886 - I've got a job and a family. - (Scoffs) 222 00:15:38,927 --> 00:15:41,885 - I'm getting married. - (Scoffs) 223 00:15:41,927 --> 00:15:47,047 And you are still the same old Auntie Millicent. 224 00:15:50,207 --> 00:15:52,198 Who... who's Auntie Millicent? 225 00:15:52,247 --> 00:15:54,761 It was what we used to call you, 226 00:15:54,807 --> 00:15:58,117 because we knew you'd turn into a crazy spinster. 227 00:15:59,967 --> 00:16:04,597 And you have, hanging out with your two freaks from the book shop. 228 00:16:04,647 --> 00:16:07,036 (Laughter) 229 00:16:07,087 --> 00:16:12,366 It was, wasn't it?! Oh, yes, Auntie Millicent who lived in the crooked house. 230 00:16:12,407 --> 00:16:15,956 - With loads of cats. - That's right - purple cats. 231 00:16:16,007 --> 00:16:19,443 - And you had sex with them all. - (Laughing) 232 00:16:23,807 --> 00:16:28,597 At least I didn't have a threesome with Mark after the school reunion. 233 00:16:28,647 --> 00:16:30,524 Oh, did I just say that? 234 00:16:34,007 --> 00:16:38,523 - Becky, we were going to tell you... - Obviously we were going to tell you, 235 00:16:38,567 --> 00:16:40,558 just not like this. 236 00:16:40,607 --> 00:16:46,125 Do you know what, Fran? You could have just kept your mouth shut. 237 00:16:46,167 --> 00:16:48,237 Exactly, Fran - least said... 238 00:16:48,287 --> 00:16:50,755 Shut up, Tanya! 239 00:16:57,447 --> 00:17:00,996 I was... waiting for the right time to tell you, Becky. 240 00:17:01,047 --> 00:17:03,481 Like her anniversary or something? 241 00:17:03,527 --> 00:17:05,597 ( Bananarama: More More More) 242 00:17:05,647 --> 00:17:09,242 ♪ Any time you want to do what you gotta do... ♪ 243 00:17:09,287 --> 00:17:11,437 Anyone for a nightcap? 244 00:17:11,487 --> 00:17:13,557 ♪ How do you like it, how do you like it? 245 00:17:13,607 --> 00:17:16,565 ♪ More more more, how do you like it? ♪ 246 00:17:22,047 --> 00:17:24,607 (Slurring) I'm going to read it again. 247 00:17:27,847 --> 00:17:33,285 There's the elephant, he's happy with his balloon. 248 00:17:33,327 --> 00:17:36,046 Oh, no! It's gone! 249 00:17:39,927 --> 00:17:41,918 Where is it? 250 00:17:41,967 --> 00:17:44,083 It's not behind the rhino. 251 00:17:48,287 --> 00:17:50,755 Look in the alligator's mouth. 252 00:17:50,807 --> 00:17:52,798 (Both) It's not there either. 253 00:17:55,447 --> 00:17:58,245 Ohh... the monkey's got it in the tree! 254 00:17:59,647 --> 00:18:04,038 - He brings it back... - (Both) They all drink lemonade. 255 00:18:04,087 --> 00:18:06,078 The end! 256 00:18:10,847 --> 00:18:13,441 - Here's to us. - (Sighs) 257 00:18:14,567 --> 00:18:19,846 Bernard, I feel sorry for the children who grew up before they could read this. 258 00:18:21,127 --> 00:18:25,040 Manny, we are going to be... very very rich. 259 00:18:25,087 --> 00:18:27,237 How rich, Bernard? 260 00:18:27,287 --> 00:18:30,484 Oh, uncontrollably, incontinently rich. 261 00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:33,837 - And... and Fran will be humiliated. - Yeah! 262 00:18:33,887 --> 00:18:37,926 See, we don't need this dirty, filthy everyday money. 263 00:18:39,367 --> 00:18:41,642 Success will bring problems. 264 00:18:41,687 --> 00:18:46,044 I don't wanna wake up in rehab with Shergar. 265 00:18:46,087 --> 00:18:50,922 What problems? We're on the pig's back, charging through a velvet field. 266 00:18:50,967 --> 00:18:53,606 There will be pressure for a follow-up. 267 00:18:53,647 --> 00:18:58,675 People will say, "You are the elephant balloon guys! Where's the next one?" 268 00:18:58,727 --> 00:19:02,766 Who cares? Who cares what our disgusting public think? 269 00:19:02,807 --> 00:19:06,243 And all the houses - you'll be in your Mustique house. 270 00:19:06,287 --> 00:19:09,723 You'll think, "Where's my designer underpants? 271 00:19:09,767 --> 00:19:11,837 "Oh, in my Kong Hong house." 272 00:19:11,887 --> 00:19:15,675 - Oh, no! - And there's the press intrusion. 273 00:19:15,727 --> 00:19:18,002 The press, will they be onto us? 274 00:19:18,047 --> 00:19:21,323 Bernard, they'll hound us like a pack of... hounds! 275 00:19:21,367 --> 00:19:23,358 But I'm not doing anything. 276 00:19:23,407 --> 00:19:29,084 I'm just strolling up the beach with my discreetly pregnant Brazilian girlfriend. 277 00:19:29,127 --> 00:19:33,006 And then the boat appears with... laden with pappa-ritzy, 278 00:19:33,047 --> 00:19:36,005 - and I'll say, "You filth!" - Filth! 279 00:19:36,047 --> 00:19:40,086 "Take a photo of me if you must, but leave her out of it! 280 00:19:40,127 --> 00:19:45,155 "She didn't ask for any of this. She's just an ordinary lingerie model." 281 00:19:47,647 --> 00:19:51,196 I can't deal with it. I just wanna live in my normal mansion 282 00:19:51,247 --> 00:19:54,125 with my normal helicopter and normal yacht. 283 00:19:54,167 --> 00:19:56,840 - Is that too much to ask? - No! 284 00:19:56,887 --> 00:20:00,357 - Manny, we must undo this thing. - What do you mean? 285 00:20:00,407 --> 00:20:03,444 - It has to go. - Yeah, you're right, Bernard. 286 00:20:03,487 --> 00:20:06,604 It's our only chance of living a normal life. 287 00:20:15,807 --> 00:20:17,798 - Ready? - Yeah. 288 00:20:24,247 --> 00:20:26,283 This is the right thing to do. 289 00:20:26,327 --> 00:20:29,285 Yeah, Mustique's probably quite nice but... 290 00:20:33,607 --> 00:20:35,837 - Get it! - Oh! 291 00:21:23,167 --> 00:21:26,318 It was a big animal, like a hippo or a whale. 292 00:21:27,447 --> 00:21:29,597 - I think it was a camel. - Was it? 293 00:21:29,647 --> 00:21:33,686 - It had lost something. - Yeah, a... wheelbarrow, er... 294 00:21:33,727 --> 00:21:36,924 chest of drawers, er, microlight, er... 295 00:21:36,967 --> 00:21:41,085 Oh, I don't know. It's not coming back. It's never coming back! 296 00:21:48,647 --> 00:21:51,161 - Oh. - You haven't written anything. 297 00:21:51,207 --> 00:21:54,165 Actually, we wrote a very good children's book. 298 00:21:54,207 --> 00:21:58,166 We had to burn it because it was too good. 299 00:21:59,527 --> 00:22:02,405 It happens all the time. £50, please. 300 00:22:05,687 --> 00:22:08,247 What sort of time did you have? Really. 301 00:22:08,287 --> 00:22:11,643 It... was... bliss! 302 00:22:12,687 --> 00:22:14,723 It was... it was so amazing. 303 00:22:14,767 --> 00:22:18,203 It couldn't have been better. Best time in the world. 304 00:22:22,967 --> 00:22:25,356 Oh, there you go, it was awful. 305 00:22:26,607 --> 00:22:28,723 But, well, the wedding's off... 306 00:22:29,887 --> 00:22:33,562 So I don't have to buy a present. I'm up on the weekend. 307 00:22:33,607 --> 00:22:35,598 Mister, how much is this? 308 00:22:35,647 --> 00:22:38,719 That's a first edition, that's expensive. 309 00:22:38,767 --> 00:22:42,362 I've saved all my pocket money and I've got nine pounds. 310 00:22:42,407 --> 00:22:45,638 - Oh, well done, you. - That is a lot of money. 311 00:22:45,687 --> 00:22:48,360 Yeah, but that's still £50 though. 312 00:22:48,407 --> 00:22:52,241 Oh, it's my favourite book ever. I wish I had £50. 313 00:22:59,847 --> 00:23:01,963 Is it really your favourite book? 314 00:23:02,007 --> 00:23:04,680 I love it more than anything in the world. 315 00:23:07,207 --> 00:23:09,198 Well, you... 316 00:23:10,007 --> 00:23:12,999 I've never said this to anybody before but... 317 00:23:13,047 --> 00:23:15,686 you're gonna have to get a job. 318 00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:51,000 Subtitles - Ripped (and Hacked) by RavyDavy - Part of the [RL] Crew 319 00:23:51,050 --> 00:23:55,600 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 25433

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