Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,916 --> 00:00:06,484
- Hey!
- Hey.
2
00:00:06,484 --> 00:00:08,095
There's nobody home.
3
00:00:10,227 --> 00:00:13,317
I wonder what that's like.
4
00:00:13,317 --> 00:00:16,886
How was your class today, dear?
Did the children listen to you?
5
00:00:16,886 --> 00:00:20,585
I teach traffic school, ma.
6
00:00:20,585 --> 00:00:23,371
- Since when?
- Since today.
7
00:00:23,371 --> 00:00:25,112
Lots of cops do it, you know.
8
00:00:25,112 --> 00:00:27,375
Chance to earn a little
spending money.
9
00:00:27,375 --> 00:00:29,290
How about spending
a little on rent?
10
00:00:31,683 --> 00:00:33,816
There may not be any money.
11
00:00:33,816 --> 00:00:36,079
Got my first
student evaluations today.
12
00:00:36,079 --> 00:00:37,994
Yeah? What did they say, dear?
13
00:00:37,994 --> 00:00:39,561
You want to know what they say?
14
00:00:39,561 --> 00:00:42,042
Okay, ma, here's what they say...
15
00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:44,566
"This class is a sure cure
for insomnia.
16
00:00:47,438 --> 00:00:50,224
Next time, just please
take away my license."
17
00:00:55,838 --> 00:01:00,451
That's just a couple of people.
Who cares what they say?
18
00:01:00,451 --> 00:01:03,759
"After ten minutes, I wanted
to take the officer's gun
19
00:01:03,759 --> 00:01:05,630
and end my misery."
20
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:14,509
I stink.
21
00:01:14,509 --> 00:01:17,120
Come on, Robert.
It was your first time teaching.
22
00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:20,689
Yeah? Well, the supervisor said
it might be my last.
23
00:01:20,689 --> 00:01:22,734
He's sitting in on my class tomorrow.
24
00:01:22,734 --> 00:01:24,127
Oh, well, now, that's not fair.
25
00:01:24,127 --> 00:01:26,129
You probably just need
a little practice.
26
00:01:26,129 --> 00:01:28,653
Well, it's really not the type
of thing you can practice.
27
00:01:28,653 --> 00:01:31,917
It's all about
relating to people.
28
00:01:31,917 --> 00:01:33,310
You're a dead man.
29
00:01:38,707 --> 00:01:41,144
Honey, listen.
You can practice on me, dear.
30
00:01:41,144 --> 00:01:43,407
Come on,
give me one of your routines.
31
00:01:43,407 --> 00:01:46,280
- What?
- One of your traffic things.
32
00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:51,807
Come on. Let's just say I'm a
crazy driver. Shut up, Frank.
33
00:01:51,807 --> 00:01:53,504
And I get caught.
34
00:01:53,504 --> 00:01:55,985
Now I've got to go
to Robbie's Traffic School.
35
00:01:55,985 --> 00:01:59,075
It's not called
Robbie's Traffic School, ma!
36
00:01:59,075 --> 00:02:01,469
It doesn't matter.
It just doesn't matter.
37
00:02:01,469 --> 00:02:04,646
Alright, let's pretend I'm
a person. Shut up, Frank.
38
00:02:06,735 --> 00:02:08,824
- You know what would help me?
- What?
39
00:02:08,824 --> 00:02:10,652
If I could practice
on all of you.
40
00:02:10,652 --> 00:02:12,001
- What?
- Yeah. Yeah.
41
00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:13,742
We got enough
for a class right here.
42
00:02:15,439 --> 00:02:16,875
No, you don't.
43
00:02:18,268 --> 00:02:20,836
- Goodnight.
- No. Stop!
44
00:02:20,836 --> 00:02:23,665
Let me walk you home, dad.
It's dark out.
45
00:02:23,665 --> 00:02:25,362
- 'Ray.'
- 'What?'
46
00:02:25,362 --> 00:02:27,364
Robert, you know what? You want
to run some things by me
47
00:02:27,364 --> 00:02:29,105
I'll be happy to help you.
48
00:02:29,105 --> 00:02:33,196
And I'll help you, too, dear.
And Frank will, too.
49
00:02:33,196 --> 00:02:37,679
- I don't believe Frank will.
- You could learn a few things.
50
00:02:37,679 --> 00:02:39,463
There's nothing wrong
with the way I drive.
51
00:02:39,463 --> 00:02:41,117
What about that squirrel
you ran over?
52
00:02:44,294 --> 00:02:45,687
He doubled back.
53
00:02:47,558 --> 00:02:51,475
- That squirrel wanted to die.
- Oh, please.
54
00:02:51,475 --> 00:02:55,827
What about our mailbox, Frank?
Did it want to die?
55
00:02:55,827 --> 00:02:58,700
Don't you have an outstanding
moving violation, dad?
56
00:02:58,700 --> 00:03:00,484
I wouldn't say outstanding.
57
00:03:02,269 --> 00:03:03,792
It was pretty good, though.
58
00:03:05,881 --> 00:03:07,752
Well, if you'll let me practice
my class on you
59
00:03:07,752 --> 00:03:09,276
it'll take the ticket
off your record
60
00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:11,408
and your insurance won't go up.
61
00:03:11,408 --> 00:03:13,628
Wait a minute. You can do that?
62
00:03:13,628 --> 00:03:16,065
Well, then why don't you just
sign the thing that says I went?
63
00:03:18,285 --> 00:03:20,722
I didn't hear that, dad.
64
00:03:20,722 --> 00:03:22,854
Alright, you didn't hear that.
65
00:03:22,854 --> 00:03:24,073
Maybe you'd like to hear it
66
00:03:24,073 --> 00:03:25,770
from some
of our finest presidents.
67
00:03:25,770 --> 00:03:27,337
Dad!
68
00:03:29,948 --> 00:03:33,517
Alright. If I have to stay,
so does Ray.
69
00:03:33,517 --> 00:03:34,823
He's got that traffic ticket
70
00:03:34,823 --> 00:03:36,216
he doesn't want to tell
Debra about.
71
00:03:38,174 --> 00:03:40,742
- Dad.
- What ticket?
72
00:03:40,742 --> 00:03:42,613
What is happening?
73
00:03:44,876 --> 00:03:48,315
Traffic school?
How long is this gonna be?
74
00:03:48,315 --> 00:03:49,925
Well, if you don't take
any breaks
75
00:03:49,925 --> 00:03:53,145
I can do a condensed version
in three hours.
76
00:03:53,145 --> 00:03:54,930
- What?
- Sweet crap!
77
00:03:57,628 --> 00:04:00,240
Wait a minute. How long is
regular traffic school?
78
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,285
Eight hours.
79
00:04:02,285 --> 00:04:04,983
And you're gonna have to go to
that if you don't come to me.
80
00:04:04,983 --> 00:04:09,597
That's right, I got all the
papers you need right in here.
81
00:04:10,815 --> 00:04:12,904
I'll go set up.
82
00:04:12,904 --> 00:04:14,515
You have two minutes
before we begin.
83
00:04:16,691 --> 00:04:19,128
I suggest you all
visit the lavatories.
84
00:04:33,795 --> 00:04:35,187
Okay.
85
00:04:36,319 --> 00:04:38,582
"Begin with introductions."
86
00:04:48,113 --> 00:04:52,901
Hello,
I am Sgt. Robert Charles Barone.
87
00:04:52,901 --> 00:04:54,772
Sixteen years, NYPD.
88
00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:58,820
And you are?
89
00:05:01,736 --> 00:05:03,259
Hated by God.
90
00:05:05,696 --> 00:05:08,133
I'm not doing this.
91
00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:13,922
Ray, okay? My name is Ray.
Je m'appelle Ray.
92
00:05:13,922 --> 00:05:15,097
Hi, Ray.
93
00:05:15,097 --> 00:05:17,186
- Debra.
- Good.
94
00:05:17,186 --> 00:05:18,840
Hi, I'm Marie.
95
00:05:20,972 --> 00:05:23,584
I'm Frank. Sign my thing.
96
00:05:29,720 --> 00:05:32,854
Now I would like to direct
your attention to the board.
97
00:05:32,854 --> 00:05:35,465
You will see, speed limits...
98
00:05:35,465 --> 00:05:38,555
"Pedestrians, signs and signals
of the highway.."
99
00:05:38,555 --> 00:05:40,165
Things that are boring.
100
00:05:43,430 --> 00:05:46,650
- Urban versus rural driving.
- Things I don't care about!
101
00:05:48,435 --> 00:05:51,916
- Insurance.
- Terribly boring things!
102
00:05:51,916 --> 00:05:54,136
That's enough, Raymond!
That's enough!
103
00:05:57,835 --> 00:06:00,272
Now I would like each of you
to tell us
104
00:06:00,272 --> 00:06:03,537
what offense
led you to be here today.
105
00:06:03,537 --> 00:06:04,842
Let's start with...
106
00:06:06,278 --> 00:06:07,367
Raymond.
107
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:10,935
I killed my brother.
108
00:06:15,418 --> 00:06:18,813
- Traffic offense.
- Oh! Oh!
109
00:06:18,813 --> 00:06:22,382
Could you go lie down
in the driveway for a minute?
110
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,645
It says right here in the binder
that each student must tell
111
00:06:24,645 --> 00:06:26,342
the offense they committed.
112
00:06:26,342 --> 00:06:28,953
Yeah, come on. Let's hear about
your little offense.
113
00:06:28,953 --> 00:06:30,477
What? It was nothing.
114
00:06:30,477 --> 00:06:33,523
I-I ran over one of those orange
cones, that's all.
115
00:06:33,523 --> 00:06:35,873
Tell her why.
116
00:06:35,873 --> 00:06:37,440
I don't remember, dad.
117
00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:40,835
I remember. I was there.
118
00:06:40,835 --> 00:06:44,186
It had something to do
with a halter top.
119
00:06:44,186 --> 00:06:47,189
- Okay.
- Halted you pretty good.
120
00:06:47,189 --> 00:06:48,712
Dad.
121
00:06:52,499 --> 00:06:55,458
You know how these things happen.
122
00:06:55,458 --> 00:06:57,721
You see somebody
and you think they're naked.
123
00:07:00,507 --> 00:07:03,466
Then you look and they're just
wearing a beige top.
124
00:07:03,466 --> 00:07:07,165
The next thing you know, you've
run over a couple of cones.
125
00:07:07,165 --> 00:07:08,993
Reckless driving.
126
00:07:08,993 --> 00:07:14,216
So you just ride around
looking for naked?
127
00:07:14,216 --> 00:07:16,087
- Well, if it won't come to me...
- Yeah.
128
00:07:18,481 --> 00:07:22,267
Look, okay, can we get back
to the course, please?
129
00:07:22,267 --> 00:07:23,965
Who can answer this question?
130
00:07:23,965 --> 00:07:28,360
"At 55 miles an hour,
you will travel over 800 feet
131
00:07:28,360 --> 00:07:33,148
"in ten to twelve seconds,
so will an oncoming truck.
132
00:07:33,148 --> 00:07:36,891
To pass safely,
how many feet will you need?"
133
00:07:36,891 --> 00:07:38,501
- 'Dad.'
- Sign my thing.
134
00:07:38,501 --> 00:07:42,026
Come on!
135
00:07:42,026 --> 00:07:43,637
What are you doing?
136
00:07:43,637 --> 00:07:46,509
Robert, that question
is really complicated.
137
00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:48,076
Is that something
they would ask?
138
00:07:48,076 --> 00:07:50,470
- It's in the binder.
- What, you know what...
139
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:52,036
Maybe we don't have
to do this class
140
00:07:52,036 --> 00:07:53,385
exactly like
it is in the binder.
141
00:07:53,385 --> 00:07:55,431
What do you mean?
142
00:07:55,431 --> 00:07:58,042
The binder's not just a guide,
Debra. The binder is...
143
00:08:00,001 --> 00:08:02,351
...binding.
144
00:08:02,351 --> 00:08:03,744
Shut up, Frank.
145
00:08:06,137 --> 00:08:07,922
- What?
- Yeah, yeah...
146
00:08:07,922 --> 00:08:09,619
You were about
to do a bathroom joke.
147
00:08:12,100 --> 00:08:15,843
- A bathroom joke?
- Yeah, about binding.
148
00:08:18,062 --> 00:08:21,022
Alright, look,
let's focus, people.
149
00:08:21,022 --> 00:08:22,458
Rice.
150
00:08:24,939 --> 00:08:28,203
- Look, please--
- Cheese.
151
00:08:28,203 --> 00:08:30,684
That's enough!
152
00:08:30,684 --> 00:08:32,903
- How about some--
- Bananas!
153
00:08:36,603 --> 00:08:37,995
Things that are binding.
154
00:08:40,737 --> 00:08:42,130
Would you please...
155
00:08:44,001 --> 00:08:48,440
These are safety issues.
And let's remember something...
156
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:50,704
Driving is a privilege,
not a right.
157
00:08:53,707 --> 00:08:56,318
Yams. I'm sorry.
158
00:08:56,318 --> 00:08:58,102
- I'm sorry, Robert.
- Don't apologize.
159
00:08:58,102 --> 00:09:00,017
That was good. Yams.
160
00:09:03,151 --> 00:09:05,066
Sorry.
161
00:09:05,066 --> 00:09:07,634
That explains last Thanksgiving.
162
00:09:10,375 --> 00:09:11,899
Oh, God.
163
00:09:14,858 --> 00:09:17,469
You're not helping, ma.
164
00:09:20,516 --> 00:09:23,693
We're just having a little fun.
165
00:09:23,693 --> 00:09:25,608
Well, we're not here
to have fun.
166
00:09:25,608 --> 00:09:27,436
Well, then, you're the man
for the job.
167
00:09:38,273 --> 00:09:41,972
- Maybe I'm not.
- Come on, Robert.
168
00:09:41,972 --> 00:09:43,974
I'm just saying
if we have to do this
169
00:09:43,974 --> 00:09:45,541
why has it got to be torture?
170
00:09:45,541 --> 00:09:47,674
I see.
I'm sorry this is torture.
171
00:09:49,371 --> 00:09:53,549
I guess the student evaluations
were correct.
172
00:09:53,549 --> 00:09:58,032
Oh, come on.
Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
173
00:09:58,032 --> 00:09:59,555
I'm just trying
to give you some advice.
174
00:09:59,555 --> 00:10:01,252
And what is that advice,
Raymond?
175
00:10:03,777 --> 00:10:05,735
I don't know.
176
00:10:05,735 --> 00:10:07,302
Lighten up.
177
00:10:08,085 --> 00:10:10,871
Lighten up.
178
00:10:10,871 --> 00:10:12,612
Thank you very much.
179
00:10:17,007 --> 00:10:19,488
Hey, you didn't sign my thing.
180
00:10:27,844 --> 00:10:30,934
- What did you do?
- What? He left.
181
00:10:30,934 --> 00:10:33,633
It breaks my heart
the way you treat your brother.
182
00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:36,679
Me?
You were all laughing at him.
183
00:10:36,679 --> 00:10:38,463
I was not laughing.
184
00:10:42,729 --> 00:10:45,035
You weren't laughing? Rice.
185
00:10:46,820 --> 00:10:48,822
That was funny.
186
00:10:48,822 --> 00:10:52,434
No, I think we were all
a little bit insensitive.
187
00:10:52,434 --> 00:10:54,784
Robert's got no sense of humor
about himself.
188
00:10:54,784 --> 00:10:58,788
That's right. You've got to be
able to laugh at yourself.
189
00:10:58,788 --> 00:11:03,358
Look at me, I laugh at your
mother all the time.
190
00:11:03,358 --> 00:11:05,229
I'm not you, Frank.
191
00:11:05,229 --> 00:11:08,058
I know. But I'm married to you,
so the joke's on me.
192
00:11:10,234 --> 00:11:12,410
Look,
Robert's feeling pretty bad.
193
00:11:12,410 --> 00:11:16,414
I mean, I think we need to
apologize and make it up to him.
194
00:11:16,414 --> 00:11:18,242
Go ahead, Ray.
195
00:11:18,242 --> 00:11:21,724
- What? No.
- Yes. Go speak to your brother.
196
00:11:21,724 --> 00:11:23,726
No.
197
00:11:23,726 --> 00:11:26,860
Oh, Robbie,
I'm so glad you're back.
198
00:11:26,860 --> 00:11:28,775
And Raymond's sorry
for what he said.
199
00:11:28,775 --> 00:11:33,475
No, no. Raymond was right.
This doesn't have to be torture.
200
00:11:33,475 --> 00:11:36,913
I just got to learn
to lighten up.
201
00:11:36,913 --> 00:11:39,699
And to that end,
I'd like to introduce you to...
202
00:11:41,526 --> 00:11:43,137
...Traffic Cop Timmy!
203
00:11:48,403 --> 00:11:50,274
- Oh, my God.
- Yeah.
204
00:11:50,274 --> 00:11:52,973
Timmy's going to help teach us
the rest of the class tonight.
205
00:11:52,973 --> 00:11:55,540
- Isn't that right, Timmy?
- 10-4, sarge.
206
00:11:57,804 --> 00:12:02,547
Look, Robert, I'm sorry what I
said about lightening up here.
207
00:12:02,547 --> 00:12:05,550
This might be too light.
208
00:12:05,550 --> 00:12:07,117
No, no, it's okay, Raymond.
209
00:12:07,117 --> 00:12:09,119
You know,
my partner Judy uses Timmy
210
00:12:09,119 --> 00:12:11,731
to teach the kids about safety
and they all love her.
211
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:15,604
Yeah, and Judy has warmer hands.
212
00:12:15,604 --> 00:12:17,519
Sorry, Timmy.
213
00:12:17,519 --> 00:12:19,913
Oh, Robbie, you're very good.
214
00:12:19,913 --> 00:12:23,220
Hey, make his eyes move again.
215
00:12:23,220 --> 00:12:26,354
- How do you do that?
- I'm not doing anything.
216
00:12:26,354 --> 00:12:28,486
Hey, Frank, why don't you
park it over there?
217
00:12:28,486 --> 00:12:30,401
And I mean legally.
218
00:12:30,401 --> 00:12:33,709
Alright. Now we got a show.
219
00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:38,670
- Can you believe this?
- Look at his little shoes.
220
00:12:40,803 --> 00:12:43,675
Alright, Timmy, tell everybody
what we'll be learning next.
221
00:12:43,675 --> 00:12:47,157
Wait a minute, Robert. Come on,
you're really going to do this?
222
00:12:47,157 --> 00:12:50,073
Hey, Ray, this was your idea.
223
00:12:50,073 --> 00:12:52,075
Did anybody hear me say puppet?
224
00:12:54,599 --> 00:12:56,253
That's quite enough out of you.
225
00:12:56,253 --> 00:12:59,256
Now why don't you sit down,
Big Nose?
226
00:13:02,216 --> 00:13:03,565
What?
227
00:13:04,653 --> 00:13:08,178
He called you Big Nose.
228
00:13:08,178 --> 00:13:10,485
Come on, come on,
we're being supportive.
229
00:13:10,485 --> 00:13:12,574
Look how cute he is.
230
00:13:12,574 --> 00:13:14,315
Alright, Timmy,
let's behave ourself.
231
00:13:14,315 --> 00:13:16,578
We're here to teach
traffic school.
232
00:13:16,578 --> 00:13:20,147
Oh, yeah, right. Okay, let's see
who can answer this.
233
00:13:20,147 --> 00:13:21,931
When you're behind
another vehicle
234
00:13:21,931 --> 00:13:24,542
what is the proper following
distance?
235
00:13:25,413 --> 00:13:27,632
- Frank?
- Uh...
236
00:13:27,632 --> 00:13:28,938
Well, if the guy's
going really slow
237
00:13:28,938 --> 00:13:30,592
I like to be right on his butt.
238
00:13:33,334 --> 00:13:35,597
So if he looks back,
he can read my lips.
239
00:13:39,644 --> 00:13:44,432
No, dad. It is one car lane
per ten miles of speed.
240
00:13:44,432 --> 00:13:48,784
Yeah, remind me to never drive
with you, you crazy old bastard.
241
00:13:58,402 --> 00:14:00,143
How's that?
242
00:14:00,143 --> 00:14:03,407
Alright.
Now let's move on, Timmy.
243
00:14:03,407 --> 00:14:05,366
Don't you have a question
for ma?
244
00:14:05,366 --> 00:14:07,585
- Sure. Marie, is it?
- Yeah.
245
00:14:07,585 --> 00:14:10,110
Hi, Marie. Okay.
246
00:14:10,110 --> 00:14:11,981
Now, when you get into the car
247
00:14:11,981 --> 00:14:15,245
what are you supposed to do
before you begin driving?
248
00:14:15,245 --> 00:14:18,553
Oh, I know that.
You buckle your seat belt.
249
00:14:18,553 --> 00:14:20,685
- Good.
- And you check your mirrors.
250
00:14:20,685 --> 00:14:22,426
Correct.
251
00:14:22,426 --> 00:14:23,732
You look to the left,
you look to the right
252
00:14:23,732 --> 00:14:25,038
you look behind you.
253
00:14:25,038 --> 00:14:28,084
Very good. Anything else?
254
00:14:28,084 --> 00:14:31,958
- No, I think that's it.
- Oh, that's it.
255
00:14:31,958 --> 00:14:33,568
She thinks that's it.
256
00:14:36,136 --> 00:14:38,529
Isn't that everything, Timmy?
257
00:14:38,529 --> 00:14:40,923
Oh, yeah, sure,
that's everything.
258
00:14:40,923 --> 00:14:44,187
But how about making sure your
first-born child is in the car
259
00:14:44,187 --> 00:14:47,060
before you pull out of a
gas station in New Mexico?
260
00:14:57,244 --> 00:14:58,854
Well, that's awfully specific.
261
00:15:00,203 --> 00:15:02,379
Is that in the binder?
262
00:15:02,379 --> 00:15:05,556
Robbie, that was 30 years ago.
263
00:15:05,556 --> 00:15:07,297
I don't have a problem with it.
264
00:15:11,867 --> 00:15:14,870
Uh-oh!
265
00:15:14,870 --> 00:15:18,961
Yeah. Remember that? Big road
trip, fun family vacation.
266
00:15:18,961 --> 00:15:20,658
Driving out to see
the Grand Canyon.
267
00:15:20,658 --> 00:15:23,357
Frank stops to get some gas
and you all drive off
268
00:15:23,357 --> 00:15:25,054
while Robert's still
in the men's room.
269
00:15:26,882 --> 00:15:28,971
How do you know?
You weren't there.
270
00:15:36,979 --> 00:15:38,981
Oh, we got a real
battle of wits going on here.
271
00:15:41,679 --> 00:15:43,986
We thought you were sleeping
in the back.
272
00:15:43,986 --> 00:15:46,946
It was only an hour driving
and then we noticed.
273
00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:49,209
We turned right around.
274
00:15:49,209 --> 00:15:52,777
Oh, only two hours.
275
00:15:52,777 --> 00:15:55,171
Excellent mothering.
276
00:15:57,130 --> 00:16:00,350
I remember that.
We missed the tribal dances.
277
00:16:00,350 --> 00:16:02,004
You would've liked that, Ray.
278
00:16:02,004 --> 00:16:03,701
I hear those ladies
don't wear very much.
279
00:16:05,529 --> 00:16:08,271
Ah, poor Raymond
missed the tribal dances.
280
00:16:08,271 --> 00:16:11,144
Raymond. Raymond. Raymond.
281
00:16:11,144 --> 00:16:13,059
Meanwhile, back at the rest stop
282
00:16:13,059 --> 00:16:15,844
a couple of truckers
want to braid Robert's hair.
283
00:16:20,066 --> 00:16:22,372
We happen to be very good
parents, Timmy.
284
00:16:22,372 --> 00:16:24,548
Ah, yeah, great family, right?
285
00:16:24,548 --> 00:16:28,552
As long as everybody's eating,
everybody's happy, right, mama?
286
00:16:28,552 --> 00:16:30,859
Just ask your husband,
Burp 'n' Slurp.
287
00:16:34,123 --> 00:16:38,214
Hey, how come you haven't said
anything about Debra yet?
288
00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:42,566
I don't have a problem with
Debra. You're alright, cookie.
289
00:16:42,566 --> 00:16:44,220
Aah! Cha-cha-cha.
290
00:16:46,309 --> 00:16:49,573
I think traffic school's
over now.
291
00:16:49,573 --> 00:16:52,054
Me, too. I'm getting tired of
Timmy's mouth.
292
00:16:52,054 --> 00:16:53,969
Ah, sit down, shiny.
293
00:16:53,969 --> 00:16:58,843
- You want to start with me?
- Dad. Dad. Dad.
294
00:16:58,843 --> 00:17:00,367
Puppet.
295
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,720
Yeah, right. If it was Raymond's
traffic school
296
00:17:05,720 --> 00:17:08,157
everybody would be sitting here
without a peep.
297
00:17:08,157 --> 00:17:09,941
But the minute this poor slob...
298
00:17:13,597 --> 00:17:15,817
...needs something...
299
00:17:15,817 --> 00:17:19,038
...everybody's too busy.
300
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:22,780
Everybody makes with the jokes.
301
00:17:22,780 --> 00:17:24,347
Nobody cares.
302
00:17:26,393 --> 00:17:30,049
Come on, flatfoot.
Let's get the hell out of here.
303
00:17:47,892 --> 00:17:49,198
Timmy's mean.
304
00:17:57,424 --> 00:17:58,773
Robert.
305
00:18:04,387 --> 00:18:05,736
Damn it.
306
00:18:06,607 --> 00:18:07,999
Robert!
307
00:18:10,611 --> 00:18:12,178
What have you done with Robert?
308
00:18:17,487 --> 00:18:18,880
Robert!
309
00:18:20,925 --> 00:18:22,797
I'm not signing your thing, dad.
310
00:18:26,714 --> 00:18:31,327
- Hey!
- Oh, hey.
311
00:18:31,327 --> 00:18:32,937
I'm not signing your thing, either.
312
00:18:34,722 --> 00:18:37,638
That's alright. Listen...
313
00:18:37,638 --> 00:18:40,119
I'm sorry about the...
314
00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:42,773
You know, telling you
to lighten up and everything.
315
00:18:42,773 --> 00:18:45,994
It's alright. Gave it a shot.
316
00:18:45,994 --> 00:18:47,822
Yeah, yeah, it went well.
317
00:18:51,869 --> 00:18:54,263
Well, that Timmy's got
a lot of issues though, huh?
318
00:18:58,049 --> 00:19:00,574
You know, Timmy's just a puppet.
319
00:19:00,574 --> 00:19:03,794
Yeah, I know.
It's good to hear you say it.
320
00:19:06,406 --> 00:19:10,018
Made a real ass out of myself,
didn't I?
321
00:19:10,018 --> 00:19:13,413
You know what people like?
Balloon animals.
322
00:19:16,024 --> 00:19:19,680
My whole life, every time I felt
bad for myself, mom would say
323
00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:22,944
"The family will help you.
We'll make you feel better."
324
00:19:22,944 --> 00:19:24,467
I'd fall for it every time.
325
00:19:26,339 --> 00:19:28,558
Yeah, well, mom and dad...
326
00:19:28,558 --> 00:19:32,301
You know, this parenting stuff,
it's just not their field.
327
00:19:37,350 --> 00:19:40,918
They did alright by you.
You're the golden boy.
328
00:19:40,918 --> 00:19:42,659
Oh, will you stop that,
already, okay?
329
00:19:42,659 --> 00:19:44,487
They messed me up
just as much as you, pal.
330
00:19:44,487 --> 00:19:46,359
Oh, yeah,
you're as messed up as me?
331
00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:49,013
- Yeah. Probably more so.
- You're insulting me now?
332
00:19:50,928 --> 00:19:53,583
You don't own messed up.
You were neglected.
333
00:19:53,583 --> 00:19:57,718
- Try being smothered.
- I used to pray for smothered.
334
00:19:57,718 --> 00:19:59,372
You want smothered?
335
00:19:59,372 --> 00:20:02,026
How about in school when
mom became cafeteria monitor
336
00:20:02,026 --> 00:20:03,941
to make sure I ate all my food
337
00:20:03,941 --> 00:20:09,208
and kept my sweater on,
and sat with her?
338
00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:12,385
- That was bad.
- Yeah. Alright?
339
00:20:12,385 --> 00:20:14,256
How about the times when you
started walking to school, right
340
00:20:14,256 --> 00:20:16,737
and mom would follow you
the whole way?
341
00:20:16,737 --> 00:20:17,955
- She did?
- Yeah, yeah.
342
00:20:17,955 --> 00:20:19,392
She'd hide from tree to tree.
343
00:20:23,265 --> 00:20:25,180
Oh, my God.
344
00:20:25,180 --> 00:20:28,139
Oh, my, that's the crazy
tree lady from the dreams.
345
00:20:31,012 --> 00:20:32,927
- Nightmares, huh?
- Yeah.
346
00:20:32,927 --> 00:20:36,060
- How long did you have them?
- I just had one four days ago.
347
00:20:38,411 --> 00:20:42,676
- That is pretty messed up.
- Yeah, it is.
348
00:20:42,676 --> 00:20:47,246
Hey, so the jumping-canoe guy is...
349
00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:48,725
Dad.
350
00:20:50,379 --> 00:20:52,729
Oh, my God.
351
00:20:52,729 --> 00:20:55,471
Thanks for coming over, Raymond.
352
00:20:55,471 --> 00:20:57,299
You really did
make me feel better.
353
00:20:59,040 --> 00:21:01,782
Man, they're worse
than I thought.
354
00:21:01,782 --> 00:21:04,872
- I should talk to them.
- Want to borrow the dummy?
355
00:21:24,195 --> 00:21:25,719
Gah!
356
00:21:32,029 --> 00:21:34,249
Not so funny without his head,
is he?
357
00:21:36,077 --> 00:21:38,079
What did you do, dad?
I need that.
25053
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
