All language subtitles for American Dad - 17x17 - Hayley Was a Girl Scout_.BAE.English.HI.C.edit.Addic7ed.com

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,801 --> 00:00:03,001 ♪♪ 2 00:00:03,003 --> 00:00:06,004 - [BELL CLANGING] - It's crab night, babyyyy! 3 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:07,639 [CRACKING] 4 00:00:10,611 --> 00:00:13,211 Mmm! Mmm. Mmm. 5 00:00:13,213 --> 00:00:15,814 KLAUS: Boy, do I love crab season. 6 00:00:15,816 --> 00:00:17,750 - Anyone get any meat? - ALL: No. 7 00:00:17,752 --> 00:00:21,019 That fish monger at Whole Foods made a fool of you again! 8 00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:22,421 Godangit! 9 00:00:22,423 --> 00:00:24,088 [WHIRRING] 10 00:00:24,090 --> 00:00:26,024 [ELECTRICITY CRACKLES] 11 00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:27,759 [WHIRRING STOPS] 12 00:00:27,761 --> 00:00:31,229 Anyone wanna go in on soup dumplings? I have a code. 13 00:00:31,231 --> 00:00:33,097 Can't. I have a troop meeting. 14 00:00:33,099 --> 00:00:35,099 Since when are you involved with girl scouts? 15 00:00:35,101 --> 00:00:37,169 I've been working with this down-and-out troop 16 00:00:37,171 --> 00:00:38,503 for a couple weeks now. 17 00:00:38,505 --> 00:00:40,038 It's been so fulfilling to give back 18 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:42,707 because girls really do face so many obstacles. 19 00:00:42,709 --> 00:00:44,109 Never run into that myself. 20 00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:46,578 Plus, I get to give the support I never got 21 00:00:46,580 --> 00:00:48,113 when I was a girl scout. 22 00:00:48,115 --> 00:00:49,514 You were in girl scouts? 23 00:00:49,516 --> 00:00:50,915 [HARP TWINKLES] 24 00:00:50,917 --> 00:00:53,117 I just got my archery badge! 25 00:00:53,119 --> 00:00:54,653 Uh-huh. I'm busy. 26 00:00:55,572 --> 00:00:57,255 We just won the big jamboree! 27 00:00:57,257 --> 00:01:01,460 Can't you see I'm trying to enjoy this night with my jar? 28 00:01:01,462 --> 00:01:02,661 [WHISTLE BLOWS] 29 00:01:02,663 --> 00:01:03,996 I'm quitting girl scouts. 30 00:01:03,998 --> 00:01:06,398 You don't care about it, and neither do I. 31 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,467 - You're quitting what, now? - Girl scouts! 32 00:01:08,469 --> 00:01:10,068 [HARP TWINKLES] 33 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:11,836 You were in girl scouts? 34 00:01:11,838 --> 00:01:12,905 Yes! I was! 35 00:01:12,907 --> 00:01:14,473 But you completely missed it 36 00:01:14,475 --> 00:01:16,274 because you never pay attention to me. 37 00:01:16,276 --> 00:01:17,742 It's true, Stan. 38 00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:19,344 You don't pay attention to either of your kids. 39 00:01:19,346 --> 00:01:22,614 If I pay too close attention, I notice all their faults. 40 00:01:22,616 --> 00:01:23,882 Like, look at Steve. 41 00:01:23,884 --> 00:01:25,484 I'm looking at him, and all I see 42 00:01:25,486 --> 00:01:27,820 is that scrawny body and little chin. 43 00:01:27,822 --> 00:01:29,822 He has glasses. His eyes don't work right. 44 00:01:29,824 --> 00:01:32,090 And I hate the frames he chose. They don't work for his face... 45 00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:34,159 STEVE: [THINKING] Oof. This is pretty rough stuff. 46 00:01:34,161 --> 00:01:37,095 Thankfully I can retreat into my rich fantasy life. 47 00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:41,633 I wonder what it would be like to be the wizard Merlin... 48 00:01:41,635 --> 00:01:44,169 Ziz secretary... 49 00:01:44,171 --> 00:01:45,704 [TWINKLING] 50 00:01:45,706 --> 00:01:47,372 Running low on quills. 51 00:01:47,374 --> 00:01:50,898 I know he likes the gray quills. Says they write more smoothly. 52 00:01:50,933 --> 00:01:55,113 And if Merlin says they're smooth, then smooth they are. 53 00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:56,648 Oh, Merl. 54 00:01:56,650 --> 00:01:58,717 MERLIN: [SINGSONG VOICE] Steve! 55 00:01:58,719 --> 00:02:00,785 Ah! I just want to make sure my robe 56 00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:02,855 is back from the launderer, hm? 57 00:02:02,857 --> 00:02:06,591 Got that big soiree with Lancelot and Arthur tonight. 58 00:02:06,593 --> 00:02:09,127 The robe? Of course! 59 00:02:09,129 --> 00:02:10,863 The robe's handled. 60 00:02:10,865 --> 00:02:12,597 Magical. 61 00:02:12,599 --> 00:02:14,799 [TWINKLING] 62 00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:16,601 STAN: ...he's constantly daydreaming... 63 00:02:16,603 --> 00:02:18,537 I forgot the robe! 64 00:02:18,539 --> 00:02:20,939 And now he's forgotten the robe. 65 00:02:20,941 --> 00:02:23,475 ♪♪ 66 00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:26,608 ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪ 67 00:02:26,643 --> 00:02:29,814 ♪ I got a feelin' that it's gonna be a wonderful day ♪ 68 00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:32,817 ♪ The sun in the sky has a smile on his face ♪ 69 00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:37,456 ♪ And he's shinin' a salute to the American race ♪ 70 00:02:39,406 --> 00:02:42,494 ♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say ♪ 71 00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:45,230 - ♪ Good... ♪ - ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪ 72 00:02:45,232 --> 00:02:46,298 Aah! 73 00:02:47,234 --> 00:02:49,568 - ♪ Good morning, U... ♪ - [SIREN WAILS] 74 00:02:51,372 --> 00:02:53,372 Guess I'm done singing. What'd I do? 75 00:02:53,374 --> 00:02:54,707 You crashed into the flagpole. 76 00:02:54,709 --> 00:02:56,975 Yes. But don't worry. My car is fine. 77 00:02:56,977 --> 00:02:58,443 Now, if you'll excuse me... 78 00:02:58,445 --> 00:03:00,178 You can't leave, sir. 79 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,780 - What about him? - Sir, that's a cat. 80 00:03:01,782 --> 00:03:03,115 I'm writing you a ticket. 81 00:03:03,117 --> 00:03:05,584 I'm allowed to crash into the flagpole! 82 00:03:05,586 --> 00:03:07,052 Tell him, Dimitri! 83 00:03:09,523 --> 00:03:11,256 [SNIFFS] Have you been drinking, sir? 84 00:03:11,258 --> 00:03:12,591 That's just ma booch! 85 00:03:12,593 --> 00:03:15,660 I drink six highly fermented kombuchas each morning 86 00:03:15,662 --> 00:03:17,529 to keep my microbiome balanced. 87 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:18,997 - [STOMACH GROWLS] - Ooo! 88 00:03:18,999 --> 00:03:21,533 The bad bacteria's getting the upper hand. 89 00:03:21,535 --> 00:03:23,067 - Let me just get a swig. - [CUFFS CLICK] 90 00:03:23,069 --> 00:03:24,903 [BOTH GRUNTING] 91 00:03:27,474 --> 00:03:29,674 You can't touch me! I outrank you! 92 00:03:29,676 --> 00:03:32,411 - [TASER CRACKLES] - Catch me, Dimitri! 93 00:03:32,413 --> 00:03:34,613 - [TASER CRACKLING] - [GRUMBLING] 94 00:03:34,615 --> 00:03:37,616 ♪♪ 95 00:03:37,618 --> 00:03:40,619 Stanford Leonard Smith, you have been charged with... 96 00:03:40,621 --> 00:03:42,420 Oh. One sec. I'm feeling a rumble. 97 00:03:42,422 --> 00:03:43,789 Booch me, Francine! 98 00:03:44,625 --> 00:03:46,091 [GLASS SHATTERS] 99 00:03:46,093 --> 00:03:47,125 Order! 100 00:03:47,127 --> 00:03:49,294 Stan Smith, I am sentencing you 101 00:03:49,296 --> 00:03:52,097 to 50 hours of community service. 102 00:03:52,099 --> 00:03:55,167 What?! First, a police officer tells me what to do... 103 00:03:55,169 --> 00:03:56,635 and now a judge?! 104 00:03:56,637 --> 00:03:57,836 Your assignment 105 00:03:57,838 --> 00:04:00,572 is to clean the outhouses at the rodeo. 106 00:04:00,574 --> 00:04:01,840 Noooooo! 107 00:04:01,842 --> 00:04:03,241 You don't have to freak out, 108 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:05,310 I'm not married to the whole rodeo thing. 109 00:04:05,312 --> 00:04:06,444 What you got? 110 00:04:06,446 --> 00:04:08,313 Umm... 111 00:04:08,315 --> 00:04:11,316 There's a girl scout troop I could help with. 112 00:04:11,318 --> 00:04:14,987 Mmmm! Mama likey! 113 00:04:14,989 --> 00:04:17,756 Okay. Adjourned! Booch me! 114 00:04:18,659 --> 00:04:20,725 People think judges are so mean, 115 00:04:20,727 --> 00:04:23,696 but all you have to do is catch them after lunch. 116 00:04:25,732 --> 00:04:27,599 ♪♪ 117 00:04:28,016 --> 00:04:29,468 Dad, I'm so excited you're finally 118 00:04:29,470 --> 00:04:31,002 doing girl scouts with me! 119 00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:32,604 Okay, let me introduce you to our troop. 120 00:04:32,606 --> 00:04:34,606 - This is Lissy. - Whatever. 121 00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:36,341 - Dana. - Not gonna remember that. 122 00:04:36,343 --> 00:04:37,809 I'm not here to make friends. 123 00:04:37,811 --> 00:04:39,478 I'm here to not clean outhouses. 124 00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:42,948 I'll be napping for a week while you do dumb girly stuff. 125 00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:45,951 Dad, girl scouts isn't all what you call "girly stuff." 126 00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:49,421 We do empowering things like camping, archery... 127 00:04:49,423 --> 00:04:50,622 People or targets? 128 00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:52,223 Well, targets of course. 129 00:04:52,225 --> 00:04:55,226 - Snooze! - Plus robotics and engineering. 130 00:04:55,228 --> 00:04:58,497 Lissy, why don't you show new troop leader Smith your robot? 131 00:04:59,366 --> 00:05:00,899 [BEEP, WHIRRING] 132 00:05:00,901 --> 00:05:04,770 [ELECTRONIC DANCE MUSIC PLAYS] 133 00:05:04,772 --> 00:05:07,038 Meh. It's no Johnny 5. 134 00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:08,974 We're rehearsing our skit for the jamboree. 135 00:05:08,976 --> 00:05:10,375 Do you want to see it before your nap? 136 00:05:10,377 --> 00:05:13,244 Look, little birdie, this here is not my scene. 137 00:05:13,246 --> 00:05:14,980 So you can tweet-tweet all you want to. 138 00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:18,784 I'm still gonna sleep-sleep all I want to. 139 00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:22,855 [SNORING] 140 00:05:25,659 --> 00:05:28,259 [BELL RINGS] 141 00:05:28,261 --> 00:05:30,061 [SNIFFS] 142 00:05:30,063 --> 00:05:32,798 Steve, did you shower after gym? 143 00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:36,467 No, my trick is to sneak in after the final bell 144 00:05:36,469 --> 00:05:38,069 and shower when it's empty. 145 00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:41,740 A luxurious rub-a-dub-dub. 146 00:05:41,742 --> 00:05:46,011 ♪ Clean Steve will smell real nice ♪ 147 00:05:46,013 --> 00:05:48,013 ♪ Clean Steve ♪ 148 00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:50,149 ♪ Preventing lice ♪ 149 00:05:50,151 --> 00:05:52,417 Thank you for helping with our possum problem 150 00:05:52,419 --> 00:05:53,752 in the locker room. 151 00:05:53,754 --> 00:05:57,356 I can't believe we found so many all-female exterminators 152 00:05:57,358 --> 00:06:00,025 and on Bring Your Teenage Daughter to Work day. 153 00:06:00,027 --> 00:06:01,827 - [SHOWER RUNNING] - Hold on. 154 00:06:01,829 --> 00:06:03,628 Sounds like one of those possums 155 00:06:03,630 --> 00:06:05,864 is doing a little rub-a-dub-dub. 156 00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:08,299 Oh, my God! 157 00:06:08,301 --> 00:06:09,935 [LAUGHTER] 158 00:06:13,841 --> 00:06:15,841 Drink it in, ladies. 159 00:06:15,843 --> 00:06:18,043 STEVE: [THINKING] Oof. More rough stuff. 160 00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:20,846 Time for a trip to Camelot. 161 00:06:20,848 --> 00:06:22,313 [TWINKLING] 162 00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:24,583 [CHICKEN CLUCKING] 163 00:06:25,124 --> 00:06:27,652 - What?! - I-I'm so sorry this is last-minute, 164 00:06:27,654 --> 00:06:29,654 but can you clean Merlin's robe? 165 00:06:29,656 --> 00:06:33,058 No! We close at 4:30! 166 00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:35,460 But Merlin needs the robe today! 167 00:06:35,462 --> 00:06:37,462 4:30 is Miller time! 168 00:06:37,464 --> 00:06:39,598 It's when I meet the Miller down at the inn 169 00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:41,733 and get drunk on Coors light! 170 00:06:41,735 --> 00:06:44,203 [TWINKLING] 171 00:06:44,205 --> 00:06:45,871 Coors light? 172 00:06:45,873 --> 00:06:48,140 - [APPLAUSE] - _ 173 00:06:49,877 --> 00:06:52,277 Here's an opportunity for you to support the girls, 174 00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:54,413 and you are just sleeping through it again! 175 00:06:54,415 --> 00:06:58,149 [SIGHS] I'm glad this is your last day. 176 00:06:58,151 --> 00:07:02,621 I was waiting and waiting, and I hear a knock... 177 00:07:02,623 --> 00:07:05,824 A knock, a knock on the door! 178 00:07:05,826 --> 00:07:07,358 But it was my mom. 179 00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:08,627 [CHUCKLES] 180 00:07:08,629 --> 00:07:12,363 I was washing the dishes and reading the newspaper 181 00:07:12,365 --> 00:07:16,702 when I hear a knock, a knock, a knock on the door. 182 00:07:16,704 --> 00:07:19,705 But it was... the mailman. 183 00:07:19,707 --> 00:07:21,306 [LAUGHING] 184 00:07:21,308 --> 00:07:24,910 I opened the door, it was... 185 00:07:24,912 --> 00:07:27,312 Cecelia and Tanya! 186 00:07:27,314 --> 00:07:28,447 [APPLAUSE] 187 00:07:28,449 --> 00:07:31,860 [LAUGHS] What? Oh, my God! 188 00:07:31,895 --> 00:07:34,253 It was four girls the whole time! 189 00:07:34,255 --> 00:07:36,988 I thought it was just two girls, but it was four! 190 00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:39,324 Did you know?! How are you sitting?! 191 00:07:39,326 --> 00:07:41,059 Rise! 192 00:07:41,061 --> 00:07:43,662 Congratulations on participating. 193 00:07:43,664 --> 00:07:46,065 What?! They didn't take first?! 194 00:07:46,067 --> 00:07:49,486 Oh, I get it. You're saying girls can't be funny. 195 00:07:49,521 --> 00:07:53,404 - Dad, be quiet! - Now you're telling me what to do?! 196 00:07:53,406 --> 00:07:56,475 I-I'm making a... connection. 197 00:07:56,477 --> 00:08:00,879 [GRUNTING] 198 00:08:00,881 --> 00:08:03,414 - [APPLAUSE] - I got it! 199 00:08:03,416 --> 00:08:07,418 Girls are told by society what they can and can't do! 200 00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:11,222 Just like I was told I couldn't crash into the flagpole! 201 00:08:11,224 --> 00:08:13,292 Hayley, have you ever stopped to consider 202 00:08:13,294 --> 00:08:15,494 what it would be like to live as a woman? 203 00:08:15,496 --> 00:08:16,962 The challenges they face? 204 00:08:16,964 --> 00:08:18,163 Dad, that's what I... 205 00:08:18,165 --> 00:08:20,099 Not now! The stars are coming. 206 00:08:20,101 --> 00:08:23,502 Even though I completed my 50 hours of service, 207 00:08:23,504 --> 00:08:24,636 I'm going to stick around 208 00:08:24,638 --> 00:08:27,372 and do everything I can to help my girls. 209 00:08:27,374 --> 00:08:28,507 Your girls? 210 00:08:28,509 --> 00:08:29,575 Yes. 211 00:08:30,711 --> 00:08:33,278 - GIRLS: Mmm! - Yes. 212 00:08:35,916 --> 00:08:37,516 ♪♪ 213 00:08:37,518 --> 00:08:40,052 I know that being a man and leading this troop 214 00:08:40,054 --> 00:08:43,522 of future SHE-EOs is intrinsically problematic. 215 00:08:43,524 --> 00:08:46,525 So I'm not here to talk. I'm here to listen. 216 00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:48,490 - Hayley? - Today we're going to finish up 217 00:08:48,525 --> 00:08:50,554 - our keepsake pillows, take... - One second. 218 00:08:50,589 --> 00:08:51,730 I don't want to interrupt because I know men 219 00:08:51,732 --> 00:08:53,932 tend to interrupt, but eww! 220 00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:56,268 Ugh! Making pillows?! 221 00:08:56,270 --> 00:08:59,471 These girls shouldn't be sewing pillows like homemakers. 222 00:08:59,473 --> 00:09:02,074 They should be making pills, like scientists! 223 00:09:02,076 --> 00:09:04,609 The biggest pills the world has ever seen, 224 00:09:04,611 --> 00:09:08,280 pills the size of pillows that kill the craziest diseases. 225 00:09:09,231 --> 00:09:11,216 Girls, if you didn't have Hayley's glass ceiling 226 00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:13,017 in your way, what would you do? 227 00:09:13,019 --> 00:09:15,554 Mmmm! Pony camp? 228 00:09:15,556 --> 00:09:16,755 Pony camp! 229 00:09:16,757 --> 00:09:18,090 - Wow! - That sounds fun! 230 00:09:18,092 --> 00:09:21,226 No! Ponies are still small horses! 231 00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:22,461 You need to think big! 232 00:09:23,964 --> 00:09:25,564 I would go to the national girl scouts 233 00:09:25,566 --> 00:09:28,100 robotics convention in Baraboo, Wisconsin, 234 00:09:28,102 --> 00:09:29,902 and compete for the golden beret! 235 00:09:29,904 --> 00:09:32,104 Holy [BLEEP]! That's it! 236 00:09:32,106 --> 00:09:33,996 I don't know what it is, but it's it! 237 00:09:34,031 --> 00:09:36,909 Whoa, whoa! I think we're getting ahead of ourselves. 238 00:09:36,911 --> 00:09:39,043 Hayley, are you mansplaining to me? 239 00:09:39,045 --> 00:09:41,778 - Women can't mansplain. - Wow. 240 00:09:41,813 --> 00:09:44,383 You got a whole long list of things women can't do. 241 00:09:44,385 --> 00:09:47,252 Girls, we are going to go to that convention, 242 00:09:47,254 --> 00:09:49,254 we are going to win that beret, 243 00:09:49,256 --> 00:09:50,855 and I'm gonna look great in it! 244 00:09:50,857 --> 00:09:52,324 [GIRLS CHEER] 245 00:09:52,326 --> 00:09:53,792 I get it. 246 00:09:53,794 --> 00:09:57,262 But we don't even have enough money to make dues right now. 247 00:09:57,264 --> 00:09:59,664 Maybe if we bring in enough from cookie sales? 248 00:09:59,666 --> 00:10:01,666 - Cookies? - Girl scout cookies. 249 00:10:01,668 --> 00:10:03,668 Your big idea is cookies? 250 00:10:03,670 --> 00:10:06,605 Oh, like little Susie Homemaker baking for the boys. 251 00:10:06,607 --> 00:10:08,673 Why don't we just put them in skirts, Hayley? 252 00:10:08,675 --> 00:10:09,942 That's what we do. 253 00:10:09,944 --> 00:10:11,276 Oh, my God! 254 00:10:12,078 --> 00:10:14,679 If we're going to make money, we need to saturate the market 255 00:10:14,681 --> 00:10:17,149 with something that shatters gender norms. 256 00:10:17,151 --> 00:10:19,818 That sketch proved your strong suit is legs. 257 00:10:19,820 --> 00:10:21,419 What other legs are there? 258 00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:25,890 Crab legs, spider legs, piano legs, turkey legs. 259 00:10:25,892 --> 00:10:27,559 Turkey legs?! 260 00:10:27,561 --> 00:10:28,827 [LAUGHTER] 261 00:10:28,829 --> 00:10:30,362 Yes! That's it! 262 00:10:30,364 --> 00:10:33,498 Turkey legs! Great big ones you get at the fair! 263 00:10:33,500 --> 00:10:36,100 That idea gets my approving laughter, as well! 264 00:10:36,102 --> 00:10:37,569 Ha ha ha ha! 265 00:10:37,571 --> 00:10:41,239 ♪ Mmm, I said, I took it and I ran for it ♪ 266 00:10:41,241 --> 00:10:42,907 ♪ I won it then I stand on it ♪ 267 00:10:42,909 --> 00:10:44,777 ♪ Money on the floor when we dance on it ♪ 268 00:10:44,779 --> 00:10:46,911 - ♪ Shine bright, finna put a tan on it ♪ - [TURKEY GOBBLES] 269 00:10:46,913 --> 00:10:48,446 ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss ♪ 270 00:10:48,448 --> 00:10:50,448 ♪ I'm a bitch and a boss, I'm-a shine like gloss ♪ 271 00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:54,052 ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss, I'm a bitch and a boss... ♪ 272 00:10:54,054 --> 00:10:55,587 We're not basting fast enough! 273 00:10:55,589 --> 00:10:58,857 Don't worry, troop leader Smith! I built something to help. 274 00:10:58,859 --> 00:11:00,392 Lissy, you're a genius! 275 00:11:00,394 --> 00:11:02,661 This will make production twice as fast. 276 00:11:02,663 --> 00:11:04,729 Could we let the arm do the turkey killing 277 00:11:04,731 --> 00:11:06,465 so we don't have to? 278 00:11:06,467 --> 00:11:09,334 No. Hand strangling is a big part of our brand. 279 00:11:09,336 --> 00:11:12,337 - DOJA CAT: [TRILLING] Aah! Aah! - _ 280 00:11:12,339 --> 00:11:14,873 Aaaah! 281 00:11:14,875 --> 00:11:16,408 ♪ I'm a boss, I'm a bitch ♪ 282 00:11:16,410 --> 00:11:19,411 ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss, I'm a bitch and a boss ♪ 283 00:11:19,413 --> 00:11:21,814 ♪ I'm a bitch and a boss, I'm-a shine like gloss ♪ 284 00:11:21,816 --> 00:11:23,482 ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss ♪ 285 00:11:23,484 --> 00:11:25,417 ♪ I'm a bitch and a boss, I'm-a shine like gloss ♪ 286 00:11:25,419 --> 00:11:27,352 ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss ♪ 287 00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:29,354 ♪ I'm a bitch and a boss, I'm-a shine like gloss ♪ 288 00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:32,491 - ♪ I'm a bitch, I'm a boss ♪ - [TURKEY GOBBLES] 289 00:11:32,493 --> 00:11:33,958 That was a disaster! 290 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,228 We didn't even sell a single leg! 291 00:11:36,230 --> 00:11:39,164 You just kept handing money back and forth with one customer! 292 00:11:39,166 --> 00:11:40,632 Yeah, I'm afraid what happened there 293 00:11:40,634 --> 00:11:42,767 was a classic quick-change scam. 294 00:11:42,769 --> 00:11:44,837 He took me for 1,600 dollars. 295 00:11:44,839 --> 00:11:46,505 [HORN HONKS, METAL SCRAPING] 296 00:11:46,507 --> 00:11:48,373 Only one person is rich enough 297 00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:50,575 to drive that close to buildings. 298 00:11:50,577 --> 00:11:52,310 Filibuster Q. Jorgenson! 299 00:11:52,312 --> 00:11:54,713 The carwash magnate of Langley! 300 00:11:54,715 --> 00:11:56,515 And he's here to make a deal! 301 00:11:56,517 --> 00:11:58,983 You wanna buy all the turkey legs. 302 00:11:58,985 --> 00:12:01,986 No. The legs are disgusting. 303 00:12:01,988 --> 00:12:03,588 But the boys down on the docks 304 00:12:03,590 --> 00:12:06,791 say that you've got an arm, a robot arm. 305 00:12:06,793 --> 00:12:08,060 I want to buy the patent. 306 00:12:08,062 --> 00:12:11,196 And I'm in the mood to spend a lot of money on it. 307 00:12:11,198 --> 00:12:12,597 Can you pay me in lazercoin? 308 00:12:12,599 --> 00:12:15,668 It's a highly volatile cryptocurrency. Can't lose. 309 00:12:15,670 --> 00:12:18,203 - O-kay... - Deal! 310 00:12:18,205 --> 00:12:20,138 We're going to Barabooooo! 311 00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:22,006 - Baraboo! - Yay, yay 312 00:12:22,008 --> 00:12:25,810 I'm-a keep that "boo" going for our hater-in-chief Hayley! 313 00:12:25,812 --> 00:12:28,080 Boooooo! 314 00:12:28,082 --> 00:12:30,482 ♪♪ 315 00:12:30,484 --> 00:12:33,418 MERTZ: This is for exposing yourself to my aunt! 316 00:12:33,420 --> 00:12:35,153 She worked so hard to become 317 00:12:35,155 --> 00:12:37,155 the family's first female exterminator! 318 00:12:37,157 --> 00:12:39,491 She's a trailblazer! 319 00:12:39,493 --> 00:12:41,560 [TWINKLING] 320 00:12:43,297 --> 00:12:46,298 It's working! Oh, no, no, no, no! 321 00:12:46,300 --> 00:12:48,433 These were iron-ons?! 322 00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:51,570 Wow, I expected more from a robe made by... 323 00:12:51,572 --> 00:12:52,971 H&M?! 324 00:12:52,973 --> 00:12:54,506 Ugh! 325 00:12:55,976 --> 00:12:57,642 You want me to hack into the troop's 326 00:12:57,644 --> 00:13:00,312 lazercoin account and drain the funds. 327 00:13:00,314 --> 00:13:02,915 - Why? - So that Dad will look like a failure 328 00:13:02,917 --> 00:13:04,383 and leave the troop in shame. 329 00:13:04,385 --> 00:13:07,815 - But won't that hurt the girls? - Only at first. 330 00:13:07,850 --> 00:13:09,388 It'll be way worse if Dad takes them 331 00:13:09,390 --> 00:13:11,656 all the way to Nationals and humiliates them. 332 00:13:11,658 --> 00:13:14,392 May I articulate a theme here? 333 00:13:14,394 --> 00:13:16,461 Are you sure you're not jealous of the girls? 334 00:13:16,463 --> 00:13:18,663 Stan has been showing them the love and support 335 00:13:18,665 --> 00:13:21,199 you never received when you were a girl scout. 336 00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:24,136 Perhaps this is why you feel the need to sabotage them. 337 00:13:24,138 --> 00:13:28,540 That's ridiculous! I'm doing this for those little bitches! 338 00:13:28,542 --> 00:13:30,342 Well, let's get Jurgen to hack them. 339 00:13:30,344 --> 00:13:32,945 I don't know anything about computers. 340 00:13:32,947 --> 00:13:35,547 ♪♪ 341 00:13:35,549 --> 00:13:37,149 [GIRLS SOBBING] 342 00:13:37,151 --> 00:13:39,151 Oh, noooo. 343 00:13:39,153 --> 00:13:41,686 Did you lose all your lazercoin money? 344 00:13:41,688 --> 00:13:44,823 No, we're crying because you... 345 00:13:44,825 --> 00:13:46,291 betrayed us. 346 00:13:46,293 --> 00:13:48,761 Lissy here just earned her hacking badge. 347 00:13:48,763 --> 00:13:52,164 She hack-blocked your hack and traced it back to you. 348 00:13:52,166 --> 00:13:57,035 You are banished from Troop 7307! 349 00:13:57,037 --> 00:13:58,637 Wh-a-a-at? 350 00:13:58,639 --> 00:14:00,105 I said... 351 00:14:00,107 --> 00:14:01,640 ♪ You're dead to us! ♪ 352 00:14:01,642 --> 00:14:03,908 ♪ I said you're dead to us! ♪ 353 00:14:03,910 --> 00:14:05,243 ♪ We hope you die ♪ 354 00:14:05,245 --> 00:14:07,846 ♪ Don't come back or show your face to us ♪ 355 00:14:07,848 --> 00:14:09,181 ♪ We hope you die ♪ 356 00:14:09,183 --> 00:14:11,916 ♪ Don't come back or show your face to us ♪ 357 00:14:11,918 --> 00:14:13,852 - Oh, yeah! - Oh, yeah! 358 00:14:13,854 --> 00:14:15,387 - Uh-huh! - Uh-huh! 359 00:14:15,389 --> 00:14:17,589 - One more time! - One more time! 360 00:14:17,591 --> 00:14:19,724 - Quiet style! - Quiet style! 361 00:14:19,726 --> 00:14:22,561 [HUSHED] ♪ Hayley's dead to us ♪ 362 00:14:25,766 --> 00:14:27,232 ♪♪ 363 00:14:27,234 --> 00:14:30,035 Okay, if we're going to win the golden beret, 364 00:14:30,037 --> 00:14:32,103 we need to make our robot deadly. 365 00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:34,239 - Or useful! - Useful for killing? 366 00:14:34,241 --> 00:14:36,107 How about a robot that cleans up? 367 00:14:36,109 --> 00:14:38,710 The bodies of your enemies. 368 00:14:38,712 --> 00:14:40,179 No. Like your house. 369 00:14:40,181 --> 00:14:41,646 [FINGERS SNAP] Like a Roomba! 370 00:14:41,648 --> 00:14:44,783 Well, why didn't you just say that, Lissy? 371 00:14:44,785 --> 00:14:46,852 But what's the problem with roombas? 372 00:14:46,854 --> 00:14:49,654 They can't get over door jambs, no kill features. 373 00:14:49,656 --> 00:14:52,657 We're gonna fix that with this troop's bread and butter... 374 00:14:52,659 --> 00:14:54,159 legs! 375 00:14:56,397 --> 00:14:58,397 Has someone been using my basketball? 376 00:14:58,399 --> 00:15:00,399 Because I heard the distinct sound 377 00:15:00,401 --> 00:15:02,534 of someone dribbling my basketball. 378 00:15:02,536 --> 00:15:04,936 We haven't touched your basketball! 379 00:15:04,938 --> 00:15:06,471 Well, don't. 380 00:15:06,473 --> 00:15:08,273 What's this nerd scribble? 381 00:15:08,275 --> 00:15:10,609 That's the robot we're designing for Nationals. 382 00:15:10,611 --> 00:15:14,145 "Ehhh! That's the robot! Ehhh." 383 00:15:14,147 --> 00:15:15,807 Get a life, Lissy. 384 00:15:15,842 --> 00:15:18,317 You wanna build something? Build a boyfriend. 385 00:15:19,220 --> 00:15:20,886 Back off my girls, Hayley! 386 00:15:20,888 --> 00:15:22,621 Your girls?! Hah! 387 00:15:22,623 --> 00:15:24,223 You may have gotten lucky, Dad, 388 00:15:24,225 --> 00:15:27,192 but the tables are about to turn. 389 00:15:28,495 --> 00:15:31,296 What's wrong with Hayley? Is she going through menopause? 390 00:15:31,298 --> 00:15:32,698 Or did she get her first period? 391 00:15:32,700 --> 00:15:35,100 She's probably mad you were never into girl scouts 392 00:15:35,102 --> 00:15:36,167 when she did it. 393 00:15:36,169 --> 00:15:38,103 Hayley was a girl scout? 394 00:15:38,105 --> 00:15:42,107 ♪♪ 395 00:15:42,109 --> 00:15:45,176 [WHIRRING] 396 00:15:45,178 --> 00:15:46,978 No competition in sight. 397 00:15:46,980 --> 00:15:49,781 The golden beret is pretty much ours. 398 00:15:49,783 --> 00:15:50,982 [CHOIR VOCALIZES] 399 00:15:50,984 --> 00:15:53,052 Her majesty! 400 00:15:54,588 --> 00:15:59,524 We have a late entry. Troop 1622! 401 00:16:00,393 --> 00:16:03,693 Troop 1622, present for competition. 402 00:16:03,728 --> 00:16:04,996 What the hell are you doing here? 403 00:16:04,998 --> 00:16:06,398 Where'd you get that bot? 404 00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:08,800 Roger, did you have sex with a robot maker?! 405 00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:11,937 I'm like eight years old, you sick [BLEEP]. 406 00:16:11,939 --> 00:16:15,006 ANNOUNCER: Robots to the competition ring! 407 00:16:15,008 --> 00:16:16,942 [WHIRRING] 408 00:16:16,944 --> 00:16:19,411 ♪♪ 409 00:16:19,413 --> 00:16:20,545 [BEEP] 410 00:16:20,547 --> 00:16:23,214 ♪♪ 411 00:16:23,216 --> 00:16:24,816 [ALL GASP] 412 00:16:24,818 --> 00:16:27,086 [WHIRRING] 413 00:16:27,088 --> 00:16:29,020 [GUN COCKS] 414 00:16:29,022 --> 00:16:30,956 - [WHIRRING STOPS] - [SOBS] 415 00:16:30,958 --> 00:16:38,897 ♪♪ 416 00:16:38,899 --> 00:16:40,365 [ALL GASP] 417 00:16:41,437 --> 00:16:44,970 Dammit. Mr. Belvedere himself couldn't do it better. 418 00:16:45,470 --> 00:16:48,840 The world is facing disconnect due to globalization. 419 00:16:48,842 --> 00:16:52,177 How would you foster a greater sense of oneness? 420 00:16:52,179 --> 00:16:54,113 BUTLER BOT: [SWEETLY] Hate turns to anger. 421 00:16:54,115 --> 00:16:56,115 Anger leads to fear. 422 00:16:56,117 --> 00:16:58,450 Fear leads to suffering. 423 00:16:58,452 --> 00:17:00,519 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 424 00:17:00,521 --> 00:17:02,721 Come on! She's gotta be cheating! 425 00:17:02,723 --> 00:17:04,656 There's probably a parrot in there! 426 00:17:04,658 --> 00:17:07,326 Spider bot, same question. 427 00:17:07,328 --> 00:17:09,260 SPIDER BOT: [DISTORTED] Destroy dust! 428 00:17:09,262 --> 00:17:11,130 Annihilate grime! 429 00:17:11,132 --> 00:17:14,533 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 430 00:17:14,535 --> 00:17:16,735 ♪♪ 431 00:17:16,737 --> 00:17:19,004 What's alarming about Steve's case is that 432 00:17:19,006 --> 00:17:22,273 even in his fantasies he remains under extreme duress. 433 00:17:22,275 --> 00:17:24,475 We may need to think about medication 434 00:17:24,477 --> 00:17:27,346 and even institutionalization. 435 00:17:27,348 --> 00:17:30,549 Do you understand what that means, Steve? 436 00:17:30,551 --> 00:17:31,750 Steve? 437 00:17:31,752 --> 00:17:33,218 [TWINKLING] 438 00:17:33,220 --> 00:17:34,953 I can't believe I found a seamstress 439 00:17:34,955 --> 00:17:36,822 who could remake the robe in time! 440 00:17:36,824 --> 00:17:39,558 [GASPS] Oh, no! These are the wrong moons! 441 00:17:39,560 --> 00:17:42,694 These are waning! Merlin only wears waxing! 442 00:17:42,696 --> 00:17:46,365 It's over! I'm done! He's gonna turn me into a newt! 443 00:17:46,367 --> 00:17:49,435 MERLIN: Steve. I've come for my robe. 444 00:17:50,971 --> 00:17:52,571 Looks great! Thanks, Steve. 445 00:17:52,573 --> 00:17:56,441 [SIGHS] I can't believe he didn't notice. 446 00:17:56,443 --> 00:17:59,044 What a day it's been in the life of Merlin... 447 00:17:59,046 --> 00:18:00,645 Ziz secretary. 448 00:18:00,647 --> 00:18:03,648 Oh, and, Steve, what's the ETA on that salad? 449 00:18:03,650 --> 00:18:06,852 - Salad? - My... salad? 450 00:18:06,854 --> 00:18:08,319 The salad! 451 00:18:08,321 --> 00:18:11,390 The salad! The salad! The salad!! 452 00:18:11,392 --> 00:18:14,125 A salad does sound good. 453 00:18:14,127 --> 00:18:16,862 - There's a new salad place across the street. - Great! 454 00:18:16,864 --> 00:18:20,131 They even give you a free piece of pita bread. 455 00:18:20,133 --> 00:18:22,601 Finally, a good therapist! 456 00:18:23,604 --> 00:18:26,471 And the golden beret goes to... 457 00:18:26,473 --> 00:18:27,739 [DRUM ROLL] 458 00:18:27,741 --> 00:18:32,211 ...troop 7307 and the spider bot! 459 00:18:32,213 --> 00:18:34,279 - [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] - Yeah ha ha! 460 00:18:34,281 --> 00:18:36,147 Dana! Come here. 461 00:18:36,149 --> 00:18:37,949 Tanya! Where's Lissy? 462 00:18:37,951 --> 00:18:40,952 Dad! We won the golden beret with my invention! 463 00:18:40,954 --> 00:18:44,089 Not now, Lissy. I'm ordering socks online. 464 00:18:44,091 --> 00:18:45,557 [BEEP] 465 00:18:45,559 --> 00:18:48,159 What? How could he not care? 466 00:18:48,161 --> 00:18:51,897 How could he ignore his amazing, gifted daughter? 467 00:18:51,899 --> 00:18:53,098 Oh, my God. 468 00:18:53,100 --> 00:18:56,968 I... I'm making a connection... 469 00:18:56,970 --> 00:18:59,238 [GRUNTING] 470 00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:01,240 ♪♪ 471 00:19:01,242 --> 00:19:02,908 [GRUNTING] 472 00:19:02,910 --> 00:19:06,912 ♪♪ 473 00:19:07,717 --> 00:19:08,980 Close enough. 474 00:19:08,982 --> 00:19:11,316 I have something to say that I should have said 475 00:19:11,318 --> 00:19:13,318 a long time ago. 476 00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:15,454 Hayley, I never gave you the support 477 00:19:15,456 --> 00:19:17,456 and encouragement you deserve. 478 00:19:18,391 --> 00:19:20,192 You're a great kid. 479 00:19:21,395 --> 00:19:24,296 Troop 7307 forfeits. 480 00:19:25,266 --> 00:19:28,133 This award belongs to you, Hayley. 481 00:19:28,135 --> 00:19:29,668 Thanks, Dad. 482 00:19:29,670 --> 00:19:32,871 ♪♪ 483 00:19:32,873 --> 00:19:34,673 That's not yours to give away! 484 00:19:34,675 --> 00:19:37,342 Lissy, look, someday you'll understand 485 00:19:37,344 --> 00:19:38,477 when you have a daughter. 486 00:19:38,479 --> 00:19:39,811 Or your dad will understand 487 00:19:39,813 --> 00:19:41,680 when he goes through an adventure like mine. 488 00:19:41,682 --> 00:19:44,950 Spider bot, activate kill mode. 489 00:19:44,952 --> 00:19:46,885 [WHIRRING] 490 00:19:46,887 --> 00:19:48,287 [SCREECHING] 491 00:19:48,289 --> 00:19:50,555 [SWEETLY] She gave it a kill mode. 492 00:19:50,557 --> 00:19:52,291 Protect us, butler bot! 493 00:19:52,293 --> 00:19:54,293 [PARROT SQUAWKING] 494 00:19:54,295 --> 00:19:58,097 ♪♪ 495 00:19:58,099 --> 00:19:59,230 [SNARLING] 496 00:19:59,232 --> 00:20:03,568 ♪♪ 497 00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:05,236 [SNARLING] 498 00:20:05,238 --> 00:20:07,639 [WHIRRING] 499 00:20:07,641 --> 00:20:11,042 Hayley, aim for the small square on its undercarriage! 500 00:20:11,044 --> 00:20:12,377 That's its weak spot! 501 00:20:12,379 --> 00:20:13,712 Why would you make a weak spot? 502 00:20:13,714 --> 00:20:15,647 It was gonna be a frozen-yogurt dispenser, 503 00:20:15,649 --> 00:20:18,617 but Lissy overpromised again and ran out of time. 504 00:20:22,255 --> 00:20:25,324 I can't do it! You take the shot. You're the weapons expert! 505 00:20:25,326 --> 00:20:27,258 But you're the scout. 506 00:20:27,260 --> 00:20:29,328 I believe in you, Hayley. 507 00:20:31,132 --> 00:20:32,798 - [CLANG] - Ahh! 508 00:20:33,847 --> 00:20:36,135 LISSY: Deactivate kill mode! 509 00:20:36,137 --> 00:20:37,202 It's not even worth it. 510 00:20:37,204 --> 00:20:38,670 [WHIRRING, THUD] 511 00:20:38,672 --> 00:20:40,906 Come on, spider bot. Let's go home. 512 00:20:43,877 --> 00:20:45,677 You want me to pull that out? 513 00:20:45,679 --> 00:20:48,547 [STRAINING] Probably not. It might be keeping me alive. 514 00:20:48,866 --> 00:20:51,260 Whew, man! I haven't run that fast 515 00:20:51,295 --> 00:20:52,617 since I ran track in high school. 516 00:20:52,619 --> 00:20:55,020 You ran track in high school? 517 00:20:55,022 --> 00:20:58,089 ♪♪ 518 00:20:58,091 --> 00:20:59,825 Bye! Have a beautiful time! 519 00:21:01,971 --> 00:21:03,829 - synced and corrected by sot26 - www.addic7ed.com 37078

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