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1
00:00:02,435 --> 00:00:03,569
- Here's the ointment,
frank.
2
00:00:03,571 --> 00:00:04,603
- Oh, thanks.
3
00:00:04,605 --> 00:00:05,604
- Hi.
- Hi.
4
00:00:07,040 --> 00:00:10,075
Yeah, dad, that's to go.
5
00:00:10,077 --> 00:00:13,078
- All right, all right,
all right.
6
00:00:15,115 --> 00:00:18,250
- Eww, you're all wet.
What happened to you?
7
00:00:18,252 --> 00:00:19,718
- Yeah, I was in
the giants' locker room.
8
00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:22,087
I ended up in the shower
with joe taggart.
9
00:00:27,293 --> 00:00:29,094
Doing interviews.
10
00:00:29,096 --> 00:00:31,630
But listen to this--
it's after practice, right?
11
00:00:31,632 --> 00:00:33,665
And--and everyone's
pretty much cleared out.
12
00:00:33,667 --> 00:00:37,036
And I hear the shower
still going, so I look in.
13
00:00:37,038 --> 00:00:39,772
- What are you looking in for?
14
00:00:39,774 --> 00:00:41,540
- Nothing.
15
00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:43,208
Shower's still going.
It's a waste of water.
16
00:00:43,210 --> 00:00:45,411
Anyway, it's joe taggart,
17
00:00:45,413 --> 00:00:48,414
And he's sitting on the floor
with his head down,
18
00:00:48,416 --> 00:00:49,715
And the water's going on him,
19
00:00:49,717 --> 00:00:52,284
And you know
what he says to me?
20
00:00:52,286 --> 00:00:54,219
- Do my back?
21
00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:59,458
- He tells me
he just found out that
22
00:00:59,460 --> 00:01:02,194
His favorite receiver,
ricky freeman,
23
00:01:02,196 --> 00:01:04,229
Who also happens to be
his best friend,
24
00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:07,066
Has been with his wife.
25
00:01:07,068 --> 00:01:08,300
- No.
26
00:01:08,302 --> 00:01:10,169
- Women.
27
00:01:10,171 --> 00:01:12,204
- Oh, so you automatically
blame the woman?
28
00:01:12,206 --> 00:01:13,705
- She's cheating
on her husband.
29
00:01:13,707 --> 00:01:15,140
- Well, what about the friend?
30
00:01:15,142 --> 00:01:17,676
He has no responsibility?
31
00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:19,845
- Well, let me
tell you something.
32
00:01:19,847 --> 00:01:23,115
God programmed man
to sow his seed where he may.
33
00:01:23,117 --> 00:01:29,721
He programmed women
to limit the crop to one farmer.
34
00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:33,592
This broad didn't
get with the program.
35
00:01:33,594 --> 00:01:35,761
- Well, maybe she was unhappy.
Did you ever think of that?
36
00:01:35,763 --> 00:01:37,663
- He told me that
everything seemed fine.
37
00:01:37,665 --> 00:01:40,666
- Well, maybe he was out
of touch with her feelings.
38
00:01:40,668 --> 00:01:42,334
- Well, maybe he had
a lot on his mind.
39
00:01:42,336 --> 00:01:44,436
- Well, maybe she needed
somebody to talk to.
40
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:46,405
- Maybe all her talking
was complaining.
41
00:01:46,407 --> 00:01:47,739
- Well, maybe he was
on the road a lot.
42
00:01:47,741 --> 00:01:50,709
- Maybe he had
to make a living.
43
00:01:50,711 --> 00:01:52,144
- Maybe all he did
when he was home
44
00:01:52,146 --> 00:01:54,346
Is sit on the couch
and watch tv.
45
00:01:57,350 --> 00:02:00,419
- When are you going
to learn, ray?
46
00:02:00,421 --> 00:02:03,188
You can't talk sports
with the wife.
47
00:02:26,679 --> 00:02:27,679
- Hey.
48
00:02:27,681 --> 00:02:29,281
- Hey.
49
00:02:29,283 --> 00:02:30,883
Fake skin.
50
00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:37,422
What's today, Thursday?
51
00:02:37,424 --> 00:02:39,558
- Yeah.
52
00:02:41,761 --> 00:02:43,495
- You want something?
53
00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:45,364
- No, no, I just wanted
to return this ointment.
54
00:02:45,366 --> 00:02:46,899
- Oh, yeah.
How'd that work out for you?
55
00:02:46,901 --> 00:02:49,535
- Good. Good.
56
00:02:49,537 --> 00:02:51,403
You didn't come down here
to show me, did you?
57
00:02:51,405 --> 00:02:53,372
- No, no, no, no.
58
00:02:53,374 --> 00:02:55,641
You know, I was talking
to garvin and stan,
59
00:02:55,643 --> 00:02:57,476
And they read your column,
60
00:02:57,478 --> 00:03:00,212
And they were going on
about how much they liked it.
61
00:03:00,214 --> 00:03:04,383
- Oh, yeah? Oh.
Well, tell them I said thanks.
62
00:03:04,385 --> 00:03:05,551
- Well, me too.
63
00:03:05,553 --> 00:03:07,920
I mean, I thought
it was good too.
64
00:03:07,922 --> 00:03:09,488
You're a good writer.
65
00:03:09,490 --> 00:03:12,591
I ever tell you that?
66
00:03:12,593 --> 00:03:14,526
- No.
67
00:03:14,528 --> 00:03:16,261
- You're a good writer.
68
00:03:16,263 --> 00:03:18,197
- Well, thanks.
69
00:03:19,566 --> 00:03:21,400
- So what you working on
there today?
70
00:03:21,402 --> 00:03:22,768
- Uh, nothing.
71
00:03:22,770 --> 00:03:24,403
Just something
on ken griffey jr.
72
00:03:24,405 --> 00:03:25,571
- Oh, yeah?
73
00:03:25,573 --> 00:03:28,273
- Yeah.
74
00:03:28,275 --> 00:03:29,741
Yeah, he's been in a slump,
75
00:03:29,743 --> 00:03:32,411
So he called his father
to help him with his swing.
76
00:03:32,413 --> 00:03:34,313
Did you know
that he does that?
77
00:03:34,315 --> 00:03:35,447
- Oh, yeah?
78
00:03:35,449 --> 00:03:37,649
Well, that's a good father.
79
00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:39,484
Hey, hey, you remember
how I took you
80
00:03:39,486 --> 00:03:40,852
To the playground
there at the school
81
00:03:40,854 --> 00:03:43,555
And I hit fly balls
to you?
82
00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:44,957
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
83
00:03:44,959 --> 00:03:48,427
I remember that day.
84
00:03:48,429 --> 00:03:49,962
- Yeah, I liked that.
85
00:03:49,964 --> 00:03:53,232
Me and you should
do that again sometime.
86
00:03:56,769 --> 00:03:59,471
- That is weird.
87
00:03:59,473 --> 00:04:00,806
- It was.
88
00:04:00,808 --> 00:04:02,474
It's like he was trying to be...
89
00:04:02,476 --> 00:04:04,476
A father or something.
90
00:04:04,478 --> 00:04:05,777
I don't know.
91
00:04:05,779 --> 00:04:07,579
Last couple of days,
he's been all...
92
00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:09,715
Pleasant.
93
00:04:09,717 --> 00:04:10,949
- Pleasant.
94
00:04:10,951 --> 00:04:14,653
Was he feverish?
95
00:04:14,655 --> 00:04:16,255
- Remember
that construction worker
96
00:04:16,257 --> 00:04:17,889
In "ripley's believe it or not,"
97
00:04:17,891 --> 00:04:21,393
The--the guy who got the metal
rod stuck in his brain?
98
00:04:21,395 --> 00:04:25,030
You know, he lived,
but his personality changed.
99
00:04:25,032 --> 00:04:27,266
- Let me guess.
He was suddenly more irritable.
100
00:04:27,268 --> 00:04:28,967
- Yes.
101
00:04:28,969 --> 00:04:31,837
Yes, but with my father,
it's the exact opposite.
102
00:04:31,839 --> 00:04:33,405
All of a sudden, he's nice.
103
00:04:33,407 --> 00:04:35,340
It's...Weird.
104
00:04:35,342 --> 00:04:38,644
At first, it seemed fake,
you know, but then...
105
00:04:38,646 --> 00:04:40,579
I don't know,
we were talking,
106
00:04:40,581 --> 00:04:43,282
And he was listening.
107
00:04:43,284 --> 00:04:45,317
Yeah.
108
00:04:45,319 --> 00:04:47,819
It was...Nice.
109
00:04:47,821 --> 00:04:49,454
I don't know.
Kind of liked it.
110
00:04:49,456 --> 00:04:51,423
- You know what I think
it might be?
111
00:04:51,425 --> 00:04:52,991
Your father's getting older,
112
00:04:52,993 --> 00:04:54,960
And this is how
he's trying to connect.
113
00:04:54,962 --> 00:04:56,528
I mean, frank's
not the kind of guy
114
00:04:56,530 --> 00:04:58,363
That would change
if you told him to,
115
00:04:58,365 --> 00:05:01,933
But maybe he's come around
to it by himself.
116
00:05:01,935 --> 00:05:04,536
- Or there's a rod
in there somewhere.
117
00:05:11,711 --> 00:05:13,478
- Ma, I do my own
shopping now.
118
00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:14,880
I don't need all this.
119
00:05:14,882 --> 00:05:17,516
- I saw your refrigerator
in that apartment.
120
00:05:17,518 --> 00:05:19,685
All right, now,
this is beef stroganoff,
121
00:05:19,687 --> 00:05:21,386
And you eat it
with the noodles.
122
00:05:21,388 --> 00:05:24,089
Ooh, and I got your favorite,
123
00:05:24,091 --> 00:05:27,326
Steak and macaroni
and ham and cheese alfredo.
124
00:05:27,328 --> 00:05:28,593
- All right, ma.
125
00:05:28,595 --> 00:05:29,761
Well, I appreciate it.
126
00:05:29,763 --> 00:05:31,530
You know,
with my schedule,
127
00:05:31,532 --> 00:05:33,365
It's hard to eat healthy.
128
00:05:35,068 --> 00:05:36,935
Oh, baby.
129
00:05:36,937 --> 00:05:38,537
- No. N-no, no, robbie. No.
130
00:05:38,539 --> 00:05:43,342
That's not for you.
Chicken is for raymond.
131
00:05:43,344 --> 00:05:44,743
- Of course.
132
00:05:44,745 --> 00:05:47,412
Raymond gets the chicken.
133
00:05:49,449 --> 00:05:50,782
- Hey.
- Hey.
134
00:05:50,784 --> 00:05:52,417
- Is dad around?
135
00:05:52,419 --> 00:05:53,685
- No. You just missed him.
136
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:55,020
He's on his way
to the barber shop.
137
00:05:55,022 --> 00:05:56,755
- Barber?
138
00:05:56,757 --> 00:05:58,657
Why doesn't he just go down
to the bowling alley
139
00:05:58,659 --> 00:06:00,392
And stick his head
in the ball buffer?
140
00:06:04,397 --> 00:06:05,697
- Come on, man.
141
00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:08,867
That's a little rough.
142
00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:10,369
- What?
143
00:06:10,371 --> 00:06:11,770
- Listen, listen,
144
00:06:11,772 --> 00:06:14,673
Has--has dad been
acting different lately?
145
00:06:16,676 --> 00:06:18,043
- You know,
now that you mention it,
146
00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:19,911
He has been
in a very good mood.
147
00:06:19,913 --> 00:06:21,546
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
148
00:06:21,548 --> 00:06:24,950
And I noticed he
hasn't been quite so cheap.
149
00:06:24,952 --> 00:06:28,120
Like today, he's not only
getting a haircut,
150
00:06:28,122 --> 00:06:30,088
He's also getting a shave.
151
00:06:30,090 --> 00:06:33,091
- Ah, I think if you're
charging dad for a haircut,
152
00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:34,860
You'd throw in the shave.
153
00:06:41,033 --> 00:06:43,902
- I don't know, lately dad's
been acting different to me,
154
00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:46,738
You know, like...Nicer.
155
00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:51,109
- Yeah? Typical.
156
00:06:51,111 --> 00:06:53,678
- So--so he hasn't
been acting nicer to you?
157
00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:55,680
- Surprising,
isn't it, ray? Huh?
158
00:07:02,121 --> 00:07:03,822
- Robbie...
159
00:07:03,824 --> 00:07:05,457
Chicken doesn't go there.
160
00:07:05,459 --> 00:07:06,625
Come on, give me that.
161
00:07:06,627 --> 00:07:08,794
Come on.
162
00:07:08,796 --> 00:07:11,530
And it's not for you.
163
00:07:11,532 --> 00:07:14,966
It's for raymond.
164
00:07:14,968 --> 00:07:17,536
- I'm good.
165
00:07:19,206 --> 00:07:21,473
- Ooh. Raymond, would you get
that for me, please, hon?
166
00:07:21,475 --> 00:07:22,974
- Yeah.
167
00:07:22,976 --> 00:07:24,910
- Give me that.
168
00:07:24,912 --> 00:07:26,945
- Raymond said
I could have it.
169
00:07:35,688 --> 00:07:38,924
You'd rather throw it in
the garbage than give it to me?
170
00:07:38,926 --> 00:07:41,059
- It's the only way
you'll learn.
171
00:07:48,835 --> 00:07:50,035
- Hey.
- Hey.
172
00:07:50,037 --> 00:07:51,636
- Hey, stan.
Hey, garvin.
173
00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:53,238
- Hey, ray's here!
174
00:07:56,043 --> 00:07:59,544
ha ha ha!
175
00:07:59,546 --> 00:08:00,745
- Hi, ray.
176
00:08:00,747 --> 00:08:01,746
We got the money
we owe your old man.
177
00:08:01,748 --> 00:08:03,048
- Frank!
178
00:08:03,050 --> 00:08:04,049
- He's not here.
He's not here.
179
00:08:04,051 --> 00:08:05,584
He went to the barber shop.
180
00:08:05,586 --> 00:08:06,751
He's getting a haircut
and a shave.
181
00:08:06,753 --> 00:08:08,186
- Well, how do you
like that?
182
00:08:08,188 --> 00:08:10,222
Diamond jim brady's
getting a shave too.
183
00:08:10,224 --> 00:08:12,257
I guess we're paying
for that shave.
184
00:08:12,259 --> 00:08:13,825
- Hey, ain't tonight
your poker night?
185
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:15,160
Why don't you just
give it to him then?
186
00:08:15,162 --> 00:08:17,128
- I'm not gambling
with him anymore.
187
00:08:17,130 --> 00:08:18,797
- Me neither.
188
00:08:18,799 --> 00:08:21,266
I never seen a guy
on such a hot streak.
189
00:08:21,268 --> 00:08:22,501
- It's not natural.
190
00:08:22,503 --> 00:08:23,668
It's supernatural.
191
00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:25,570
- You know why?
192
00:08:25,572 --> 00:08:27,739
'cause he's a witch.
That's what he is, a witch.
193
00:08:27,741 --> 00:08:29,574
- Not a witch, a warlock.
194
00:08:29,576 --> 00:08:31,676
- Nobody says warlock anymore.
They're all witches.
195
00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:33,178
- Okay, guys.
196
00:08:33,180 --> 00:08:35,146
- You're telling me
he's a male witch?
197
00:08:35,148 --> 00:08:36,882
- You don't say male witch.
It's like male nurse.
198
00:08:36,884 --> 00:08:38,049
Nowadays,
they're all just nurses.
199
00:08:38,051 --> 00:08:39,551
- I'll see that
he gets that.
200
00:08:39,553 --> 00:08:41,086
- Then I say
he's a witch doctor.
201
00:08:41,088 --> 00:08:43,655
I swear, ray, he put
some kind of voodoo curse
202
00:08:43,657 --> 00:08:45,056
On joe taggart last week.
203
00:08:45,058 --> 00:08:46,758
- Yeah, he kept saying
he had this feeling
204
00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:49,160
That joe taggart
was off his game.
205
00:08:49,162 --> 00:08:51,930
- Wait a minute; I thought you
were talking about poker.
206
00:08:51,932 --> 00:08:53,832
- No, no.
We've been betting sports.
207
00:08:53,834 --> 00:08:56,067
- Yeah, yesterday your father
takes seattle over the yanks,
208
00:08:56,069 --> 00:08:57,235
And would you believe,
209
00:08:57,237 --> 00:08:58,670
Griffey breaks out
of his slump
210
00:08:58,672 --> 00:09:00,572
And knocks in
a couple of homers.
211
00:09:00,574 --> 00:09:02,073
- How could he know
about griffey?
212
00:09:02,075 --> 00:09:03,708
Come on, garvin,
213
00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:05,210
Let's catch up to him
at the barber shop.
214
00:09:05,212 --> 00:09:07,078
- Uh, wait a minute,
wait a minute.
215
00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:09,214
You know what?
I'll see that he gets that.
216
00:09:09,216 --> 00:09:10,582
- That's all right.
We'll do it.
217
00:09:10,584 --> 00:09:12,250
- No, if you don't mind,
218
00:09:12,252 --> 00:09:15,153
I'd really like
to give it to him.
219
00:09:15,155 --> 00:09:17,022
- Fine with me.
220
00:09:17,024 --> 00:09:20,191
- He's not a gracious winner,
your father.
221
00:09:20,193 --> 00:09:21,826
You know what he is?
222
00:09:21,828 --> 00:09:24,596
He's a witch who made a pact
with the devil.
223
00:09:24,598 --> 00:09:27,132
- He didn't make a pact
with the devil.
224
00:09:27,134 --> 00:09:28,733
He is the devil.
225
00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:31,336
Satan!
Beelzebub!
226
00:09:31,338 --> 00:09:34,272
This house
should have 666!
227
00:09:34,274 --> 00:09:36,207
Hey, nice to see you, ray.
228
00:09:36,209 --> 00:09:37,676
Say hi to your mom.
229
00:09:47,887 --> 00:09:50,355
- Ah, I feel like
I'm back in the womb.
230
00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:55,293
- 15 years you been coming
to me, frank.
231
00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:58,096
How come you finally
sprung for a shave?
232
00:09:58,098 --> 00:10:00,599
- Times are good, sal.
Times are good.
233
00:10:02,335 --> 00:10:03,735
- Hey, dad.
234
00:10:03,737 --> 00:10:05,236
- Hey, ray.
235
00:10:05,238 --> 00:10:07,305
Sal, this is my son ray.
236
00:10:07,307 --> 00:10:08,907
- A son?
237
00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:13,845
15 years, you never told me
you had a son.
238
00:10:13,847 --> 00:10:15,880
- I got two.
239
00:10:15,882 --> 00:10:18,817
This one's a sportswriter,
a great sportswriter.
240
00:10:18,819 --> 00:10:20,085
- Aw, come on, dad.
241
00:10:20,087 --> 00:10:21,219
- Ah, don't be modest.
242
00:10:21,221 --> 00:10:22,854
He's one of the best.
243
00:10:22,856 --> 00:10:25,290
You ever hear of ray barone?
244
00:10:25,292 --> 00:10:26,858
- Ray barone?
245
00:10:26,860 --> 00:10:28,627
You're ray barone's father?
246
00:10:28,629 --> 00:10:32,163
15 years, you never told me
your last name.
247
00:10:32,165 --> 00:10:36,167
- I didn't want to bother you.
248
00:10:36,169 --> 00:10:37,669
- Hey, stan and garvin
came by,
249
00:10:37,671 --> 00:10:38,937
And they, uh, wanted me
to give you this.
250
00:10:38,939 --> 00:10:40,672
- Ah. Thank you.
251
00:10:40,674 --> 00:10:43,041
- Yeah. What'd you,
win at poker or something?
252
00:10:43,043 --> 00:10:44,909
- Uh, something like that.
253
00:10:44,911 --> 00:10:46,778
Hey, ray, how about a shave?
254
00:10:46,780 --> 00:10:48,780
- No, uh, I don't think so.
255
00:10:48,782 --> 00:10:51,082
- Hey, I know this is not
the kind of highfalutin salon
256
00:10:51,084 --> 00:10:53,385
You usually go to.
257
00:10:53,387 --> 00:10:57,288
- The hair barn?
258
00:10:57,290 --> 00:10:59,290
- Come on.
We'll talk.
259
00:10:59,292 --> 00:11:01,159
- Oh, you--
you wanna talk.
260
00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,762
All right, great, yeah,
let's talk, yeah.
261
00:11:03,764 --> 00:11:04,829
- Yeah, my treat.
262
00:11:04,831 --> 00:11:06,031
- Your treat. Ha.
263
00:11:06,033 --> 00:11:09,334
In that case,
give me a perm.
264
00:11:09,336 --> 00:11:11,803
- A shave for my boy, sal.
265
00:11:11,805 --> 00:11:15,674
- Dominic. Customer.
266
00:11:15,676 --> 00:11:17,809
Ah, sit down here, ray.
267
00:11:17,811 --> 00:11:20,211
Yeah, yeah.
268
00:11:20,213 --> 00:11:22,814
See?
See, this is nice--
269
00:11:22,816 --> 00:11:27,452
Father and son
getting a shave together.
270
00:11:27,454 --> 00:11:28,987
Ah...
271
00:11:28,989 --> 00:11:31,056
My son won't even
talk to me.
272
00:11:31,058 --> 00:11:33,258
I don't know,
maybe it's that metal bolt
273
00:11:33,260 --> 00:11:35,126
He's got stuck
through his tongue.
274
00:11:35,128 --> 00:11:38,029
I mean...
275
00:11:38,031 --> 00:11:39,431
- That's too bad.
276
00:11:39,433 --> 00:11:41,966
A father should be able
to talk to his son.
277
00:11:41,968 --> 00:11:43,435
Right, son?
278
00:11:43,437 --> 00:11:45,136
- Right.
Right, dad.
279
00:11:45,138 --> 00:11:47,038
We've been having
some real good conversations
280
00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:48,073
Lately, haven't we?
281
00:11:48,075 --> 00:11:51,009
- We sure have.
- Yeah.
282
00:11:51,011 --> 00:11:53,111
Yeah, they've been enriching.
283
00:11:53,113 --> 00:11:55,814
Have they been enriching
for you, dad?
284
00:11:55,816 --> 00:11:58,983
Aah! Oh, my god!
285
00:11:58,985 --> 00:12:00,885
That's hot!
286
00:12:00,887 --> 00:12:06,224
- Hot towel.
287
00:12:06,226 --> 00:12:08,193
- What, you got that, uh,
sensitive skin?
288
00:12:08,195 --> 00:12:12,063
- Yeah, it's sensitive
to fire.
289
00:12:14,501 --> 00:12:18,269
- So, uh, what are you
working on there today, ray?
290
00:12:18,271 --> 00:12:20,438
- Hockey. Hockey.
The avalanche.
291
00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:22,307
They're in town
to play the rangers.
292
00:12:22,309 --> 00:12:25,276
- Oh, yeah?
The rangers don't have a chance.
293
00:12:25,278 --> 00:12:28,012
- Uh, I wouldn't be
so sure about that.
294
00:12:28,014 --> 00:12:30,115
- Oh, yeah? Why?
295
00:12:30,117 --> 00:12:31,816
- Well, nobody know--
pfft!
296
00:12:39,859 --> 00:12:41,793
- You moved.
297
00:12:44,196 --> 00:12:47,065
- What, ray?
Nobody knows what?
298
00:12:51,270 --> 00:12:53,938
Nobody knows about, uh...
299
00:12:53,940 --> 00:12:57,008
Patrick roy.
300
00:12:57,010 --> 00:12:59,277
- The avalanche goalie?
301
00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:00,278
- Yeah, he's out.
302
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:01,846
Knee problems.
303
00:13:01,848 --> 00:13:04,315
I think the rangers
got a pretty good shot.
304
00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:06,851
- Yeah, no kidding?
305
00:13:06,853 --> 00:13:08,219
Uh, thanks, sal.
306
00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:09,420
Thanks.
307
00:13:09,422 --> 00:13:12,557
Ahh, feel like a baby's butt.
308
00:13:12,559 --> 00:13:14,092
- W-what's your hurry, dad?
309
00:13:14,094 --> 00:13:15,393
- I gotta see a guy
about a thing.
310
00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:17,162
- I thought
we were gonna talk.
311
00:13:17,164 --> 00:13:19,297
- Here you go, buddy,
and here...
312
00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:20,999
This is for
my favorite son.
313
00:13:26,306 --> 00:13:29,440
- Father and son,
it's a sacred thing.
314
00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:34,012
Beautiful.
315
00:13:34,014 --> 00:13:35,580
Now, don't move your head.
316
00:13:35,582 --> 00:13:37,582
This is very sharp, honey.
317
00:13:44,123 --> 00:13:45,824
- So your father's
just been using you?
318
00:13:45,826 --> 00:13:48,827
- Yep.
I'm just a tip sheet to him.
319
00:13:48,829 --> 00:13:50,261
- Yeah.
320
00:13:50,263 --> 00:13:52,130
- What are you laughing at?
321
00:13:52,132 --> 00:13:56,067
- I thought dad
liked you more.
322
00:13:56,069 --> 00:14:00,839
Welcome home.
323
00:14:00,841 --> 00:14:02,106
- All right, come on, ally,
bedtime.
324
00:14:02,108 --> 00:14:03,508
- Daddy, will you
tell me a story?
325
00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:06,311
- Yeah. Yeah, here.
Jump on.
326
00:14:06,313 --> 00:14:07,946
Ohh!
327
00:14:07,948 --> 00:14:10,148
Once upon a time,
there was a little boy
328
00:14:10,150 --> 00:14:13,284
Who had
a very mean father.
329
00:14:15,287 --> 00:14:18,122
- Robert, I'm glad you're here.
330
00:14:18,124 --> 00:14:20,291
I think I figured out
331
00:14:20,293 --> 00:14:22,994
Why your father's been
acting so differently.
332
00:14:22,996 --> 00:14:25,363
It all adds up.
333
00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:27,298
I mean, the pleasantness
and the spending
334
00:14:27,300 --> 00:14:29,234
And the haircut.
335
00:14:29,236 --> 00:14:31,536
He's fooling around.
336
00:14:31,538 --> 00:14:33,938
- Fooling around?
Come on.
337
00:14:33,940 --> 00:14:35,306
- I'll tell you something.
338
00:14:35,308 --> 00:14:36,875
If that weasel thinks
he can stay with me
339
00:14:36,877 --> 00:14:38,643
And keep some chippy
on the side, boy--
340
00:14:38,645 --> 00:14:39,644
- Where's ray?
341
00:14:39,646 --> 00:14:41,012
- Who is it, frank,
342
00:14:41,014 --> 00:14:42,013
Harriet lichtman?
343
00:14:42,015 --> 00:14:43,014
- Ray!
344
00:14:43,016 --> 00:14:44,315
- Oh, sure, sure,
345
00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:46,251
You're just her bridge partner,
huh?
346
00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:48,353
You know,
that's a wig she wears.
347
00:14:48,355 --> 00:14:49,988
- Ray!
348
00:14:49,990 --> 00:14:51,656
- Hey, keep it down.
The kids are in bed.
349
00:14:51,658 --> 00:14:53,124
- Ray!
- What?
350
00:14:53,126 --> 00:14:55,193
- Mommy!
351
00:14:55,195 --> 00:14:58,062
- You're killing me,
frank.
352
00:14:58,064 --> 00:14:59,564
- Hey, dad.
353
00:14:59,566 --> 00:15:02,400
What, did you come by to have
another chat?
354
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:04,936
- Don't you think you can come
crawling back, frank,
355
00:15:04,938 --> 00:15:06,938
'cause lips that touch
harriet lichtman
356
00:15:06,940 --> 00:15:10,208
Will never touch mine.
357
00:15:10,210 --> 00:15:13,311
- Quiet, marie.
358
00:15:13,313 --> 00:15:14,579
I go to the lodge tonight,
359
00:15:14,581 --> 00:15:16,180
I turn on
the ranger-avalanche game.
360
00:15:16,182 --> 00:15:18,116
It's in overtime.
361
00:15:18,118 --> 00:15:21,686
Guess who's playing
goalie for the avalanche!
362
00:15:21,688 --> 00:15:24,022
- Why, I believe
that's patrick roy.
363
00:15:26,625 --> 00:15:30,695
- Does anybody care
about me?
364
00:15:30,697 --> 00:15:32,530
- Ma, dad's not cheating on you.
365
00:15:32,532 --> 00:15:34,065
He's cheating on ray.
366
00:15:34,067 --> 00:15:35,466
- What?
367
00:15:35,468 --> 00:15:38,136
- You told me he wasn't
gonna play tonight!
368
00:15:38,138 --> 00:15:39,704
- Must have got it wrong.
369
00:15:39,706 --> 00:15:42,440
Whoops.
370
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:45,176
- I got a lot of money
on this game.
371
00:15:45,178 --> 00:15:46,311
- Money?
372
00:15:46,313 --> 00:15:47,946
Dad, you wouldn't be betting
373
00:15:47,948 --> 00:15:50,515
With information
I gave you, would you?
374
00:15:51,984 --> 00:15:55,987
- You set me up.
375
00:15:55,989 --> 00:15:57,155
- Yes, sir.
376
00:15:57,157 --> 00:15:58,389
- I'm family.
377
00:15:58,391 --> 00:16:00,391
You never go
against the family.
378
00:16:00,393 --> 00:16:02,727
- What family?
You used me.
379
00:16:02,729 --> 00:16:05,129
Coming around here
being all warm and cuddly,
380
00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:06,698
Compliments out the wazoo.
381
00:16:06,700 --> 00:16:08,232
You just wanted
inside information
382
00:16:08,234 --> 00:16:11,669
So you could bet
guys at the lodge.
383
00:16:11,671 --> 00:16:14,339
- So you're not having an affair
with harriet lichtman?
384
00:16:16,542 --> 00:16:19,444
- Was there an offer?
385
00:16:19,446 --> 00:16:21,980
- See, ma...
386
00:16:21,982 --> 00:16:25,249
I told you it was nothing.
387
00:16:25,251 --> 00:16:26,751
- Oh.
388
00:16:26,753 --> 00:16:30,755
You would think
I'd be happier.
389
00:16:30,757 --> 00:16:32,523
Come on, robbie.
390
00:16:32,525 --> 00:16:35,760
- Hey, dad if you want,
you can use me for stuff,
391
00:16:35,762 --> 00:16:38,629
'cause I wouldn't mind
the occasional compliment,
392
00:16:38,631 --> 00:16:41,299
Even if it is from your wazoo.
393
00:16:44,570 --> 00:16:45,636
- Oh, a power play, dad.
394
00:16:45,638 --> 00:16:47,005
Your rangers are in trouble.
395
00:16:47,007 --> 00:16:48,039
You're going down.
396
00:16:48,041 --> 00:16:50,008
- Damn you!
397
00:16:50,010 --> 00:16:53,144
Come on!
Center it! Center it!
398
00:16:53,146 --> 00:16:55,513
- Hit him off the puck!
- There it is!
399
00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:57,048
Go!
400
00:16:57,050 --> 00:16:58,349
- Shoots, scores!
401
00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:01,052
- Yes!
- Rangers win!
402
00:17:01,054 --> 00:17:04,188
- Yes! Yeees!
403
00:17:10,729 --> 00:17:12,397
You see this?
404
00:17:12,399 --> 00:17:17,435
This is proof of god here.
405
00:17:17,437 --> 00:17:19,270
You go against
your father,
406
00:17:19,272 --> 00:17:21,372
Thou art smited.
407
00:17:27,312 --> 00:17:28,579
I tell you
what I'm gonna do.
408
00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:30,314
I-I'll...
409
00:17:30,316 --> 00:17:33,418
I'll split the money
with you.
410
00:17:33,420 --> 00:17:36,454
Come on, you're not
gonna say no to 15 grand.
411
00:17:36,456 --> 00:17:39,791
- 15 grand?
412
00:17:39,793 --> 00:17:41,492
- Okay, 80 bucks.
413
00:17:45,164 --> 00:17:48,099
- Don't talk to me anymore.
414
00:17:48,101 --> 00:17:49,634
- What do you
get so mad about?
415
00:17:49,636 --> 00:17:51,436
You know, we had fun,
didn't we?
416
00:17:51,438 --> 00:17:53,438
We were hanging out,
palling around,
417
00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:55,706
Having conversations.
418
00:17:55,708 --> 00:17:58,209
- Yeah, you know what, dad?
I did have fun.
419
00:17:58,211 --> 00:18:01,379
I thought you were talking
to me like a real father.
420
00:18:01,381 --> 00:18:04,382
- There you go.
421
00:18:04,384 --> 00:18:06,751
- Good. Good, good. Go.
422
00:18:06,753 --> 00:18:09,320
- Hey, you think I like
having to do
423
00:18:09,322 --> 00:18:12,457
The hokey-pokey around you
just to get some information?
424
00:18:12,459 --> 00:18:14,525
I mean, if--if you
weren't such a boy scout,
425
00:18:14,527 --> 00:18:16,160
I could just come
right out and say,
426
00:18:16,162 --> 00:18:18,162
"ray, who do you like
in the game tonight?"
427
00:18:18,164 --> 00:18:23,334
And then we'd bet together,
and we'd win together.
428
00:18:23,336 --> 00:18:26,137
And then we'd go
to one of those restaurants
429
00:18:26,139 --> 00:18:27,772
Where the girls have
the tight tops
430
00:18:27,774 --> 00:18:32,577
And bring you the big burgers.
431
00:18:32,579 --> 00:18:36,114
That's the real
father-and-son stuff.
432
00:18:37,616 --> 00:18:40,151
- That's real nice, dad,
433
00:18:40,153 --> 00:18:42,453
But you know what I do
for a living.
434
00:18:42,455 --> 00:18:45,223
You know I could never
bet with you.
435
00:18:45,225 --> 00:18:47,225
- Hence the ruse.
436
00:18:52,598 --> 00:18:53,764
Ahh...
437
00:19:02,241 --> 00:19:04,275
You know, you're out of line
438
00:19:04,277 --> 00:19:07,411
If you think
that I was faking
439
00:19:07,413 --> 00:19:11,382
Th-the part
about enjoying...
440
00:19:11,384 --> 00:19:14,619
Whatever, you know,
you and me...
441
00:19:14,621 --> 00:19:16,888
A-and, uh...
442
00:19:16,890 --> 00:19:19,891
If that's how you feel
about the betting stuff,
443
00:19:19,893 --> 00:19:21,225
I won't do it anymore.
444
00:19:21,227 --> 00:19:23,528
Okay?
445
00:19:34,873 --> 00:19:36,807
- What are you doing?
446
00:19:40,946 --> 00:19:44,916
- Uh, how are the kids?
447
00:19:44,918 --> 00:19:47,718
- Yeah. They're good.
448
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:50,388
- And how do the twins
like that new preschool there?
449
00:19:50,390 --> 00:19:53,925
- Yeah. They like it.
It's good.
450
00:19:53,927 --> 00:19:56,494
- Good.
451
00:19:56,496 --> 00:20:00,431
Okay.
452
00:20:00,433 --> 00:20:01,899
- What?
453
00:20:01,901 --> 00:20:03,601
- I think that was
a good start, don't you?
454
00:20:03,603 --> 00:20:05,236
Let's not push it.
455
00:20:05,238 --> 00:20:06,571
- Yeah, okay.
456
00:20:06,573 --> 00:20:07,572
Maybe we'll do
some more tomorrow.
457
00:20:07,574 --> 00:20:10,708
- Let's play it by ear.
458
00:20:10,710 --> 00:20:11,909
- Yeah.
459
00:20:17,749 --> 00:20:18,849
- Hey, dad.
460
00:20:18,851 --> 00:20:20,885
- Hey.
461
00:20:20,887 --> 00:20:21,886
- Listen...
462
00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:23,487
You know the corner
463
00:20:23,489 --> 00:20:25,256
Of hempstead turnpike
and uniondale?
464
00:20:25,258 --> 00:20:26,958
- Yeah.
465
00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:28,793
- There's a new
speed trap there.
466
00:20:36,268 --> 00:20:39,470
- Good to know.
467
00:20:39,472 --> 00:20:40,638
Ray already told me.
468
00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:43,641
- Come on!
469
00:20:43,643 --> 00:20:45,009
Gah!
31866
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