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[Soft music plays]
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We're gathered here today
3
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to witness the holy union of
Jess Kato and Todd Hinkle.
4
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I can't believe this
is actually happening.
5
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I can.
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It's all I've ever wanted.
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Todd has chosen to recite his
vows in Jess' native language.
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Babe, you learned Japanese for me?!
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_
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_
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Oh, my God!
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_
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_
14
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_
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_
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_
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_
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_
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Arigato.
20
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I love you so much.
21
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And now the rings.
22
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My God, babe!
23
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It's so beautiful. Is that...
24
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- My Callaway.
- [Gasps]
25
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I melted it down and forged this ring.
26
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After all, it's just a golf club.
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That's what I said!
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Todd...
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do you take this woman to be
your lawfully wedded wife?
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Abso-lutely.
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- Yes!
- Forever?
32
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Like, you're 100% sure?
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Of course.
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It's been seven years.
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I think I'd know after seven years.
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[Laughter]
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Then I can now pronounce
you Mr. and Mrs. Todd Kato.
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[Mendelssohn's "Wedding March" plays]
39
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[Cheering]
40
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[Sniffing]
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- [Farting]
- [Sniffing]
42
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Ohh! Oh!
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Todd!
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- What? What, what, what, what, what?!
- Todd!
45
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Oh, Jesus! Ew! Who beefed in here?
46
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Oh, Jess, go outside
if you have to fart.
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Todd!
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What are we doing?
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Well, I was trying to sleep.
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No, Todd, I'm serious.
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We've been together for seven years.
52
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Do you want to build
a life with me or not?
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Do I really have to
answer this right now?
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Oh, my God!
55
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I'm sleeping outside!
56
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Jess, come on! It's the
middle of the night.
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I get sleepy brain. You know that.
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Jess!
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Jess! Come on!
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Bugs out here!
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Jess?!
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63
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Holy hell.
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Why is the water so high?
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The pile!
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Guys!
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Guys!
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The stuff!
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All the chips... so many chips!
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Hurry!
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The tide is gonna take...
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...all the stuff.
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- Synced and corrected by martythecrazy -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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Yep.
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Yep, looks like the tide got
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the community pile during the night.
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The ocean can be a fickle bitch.
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Wait, so all the airline food
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and sun block and first-aid stuff...
80
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It's all just gone?
81
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The only thing left are those two bags,
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and they're both completely empty.
83
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And I haven't been able to catch
any boar in a couple of days.
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Damn it! Whose genius idea was it
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to put all of our stuff
next to the water?
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Well, at this point,
does it even matter?
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It was Turdhole's.
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Oh, come on, Karen!
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I didn't want the jungle bugs to get in.
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You shitting me, Turdhole?!
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I should kill you.
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Oh!
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I'm so tired of this island.
94
00:03:51,074 --> 00:03:52,509
Pack...
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think of it as your
sacrifice to the ocean.
96
00:03:55,647 --> 00:03:59,585
Enjoy those peanut butter-filled
pretzels, Mother Gaia.
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Are you high right now?
98
00:04:00,643 --> 00:04:02,258
A little bit, yeah.
99
00:04:03,051 --> 00:04:04,921
Hey, Jess, I need to talk to you.
100
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What do you want, Todd?
101
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Meet me in the tent in 10, please.
102
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[Sighs]
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Owen: Okay.
104
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Relax. You can do this.
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Deep breath.
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[Gerry Rafferty's "Baker Street" plays]
107
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- [Music stops]
- Owen, hurry up, I got to go!
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I'm going, okay?
109
00:04:29,413 --> 00:04:32,756
[Sighs] Okay. [Breathes deeply]
110
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You're in a safe place.
111
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You're in a beautiful marble bathroom.
112
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What do you got? What do you got here?
113
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There's a big... big old roll
of double-ply right there.
114
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Okay. Here we go.
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[Music resumes]
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- [Music stops]
- Other people have to use the shit hole...
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Diane, I am going!
118
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One second!
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Whew.
120
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[Song resumes]
121
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Nobody's here. Nobody's here.
122
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You are all alone.
123
00:05:01,763 --> 00:05:04,189
Owen, it has been half an hour!
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Don't look at me!
125
00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:08,133
What do you want, Todd?
126
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Oh, my God!
127
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Jess?
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Babe?
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Will you...
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check this shit out!
131
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W-What?
132
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What... What is this?
133
00:05:22,941 --> 00:05:25,044
It's the community pile. I saved it,
134
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and now everyone thinks it's gone.
135
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[Laughs] How rad is that?
136
00:05:29,434 --> 00:05:30,956
Why do you look so disappointed?
137
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No, no, no. There's, like,
a ton of beef jerky in here.
138
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This stuff belongs to everyone, okay?
139
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No, no, no, no. They think it's gone.
140
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This is ours now.
141
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Jess...
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Baby, this is for us.
143
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All right, remember what you said.
144
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You want to build a life together.
145
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Well, that's what I'm trying to do.
146
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And this... this can be...
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our nest egg.
148
00:05:51,034 --> 00:05:53,425
Oh, my God, you are so unbelievable!
149
00:05:53,961 --> 00:05:55,585
What are you talking about?!
150
00:05:55,610 --> 00:05:57,759
When I said that, Todd, I
wasn't talking about things.
151
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- Hey, keep your voice down.
- I was talking about a proposal.
152
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What?!
153
00:06:00,862 --> 00:06:03,220
[Sighs]
154
00:06:04,159 --> 00:06:08,126
I thought you were going to
propose to me on this trip.
155
00:06:08,151 --> 00:06:11,122
But instead, it was a
"Hangover 2" locations tour.
156
00:06:11,950 --> 00:06:13,817
You love the Wolf Pack.
157
00:06:15,470 --> 00:06:16,645
When I first met you,
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I thought you were the
coolest senior at ASU.
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- I was.
- And when we both graduated,
160
00:06:20,153 --> 00:06:23,550
I followed you to Scottsdale
because we had fun together.
161
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But now...
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...I need something more.
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Okay, Jess, just...
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Return the stuff
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or I'll tell everyone you took it.
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[Clears throat]
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[Mystical music plays]
168
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Pack: Chet?
169
00:06:43,579 --> 00:06:44,614
Chet?!
170
00:06:44,646 --> 00:06:46,789
Chet?! Chet?!
171
00:06:46,814 --> 00:06:48,282
Oh, hi. Hey, whoa.
172
00:06:48,314 --> 00:06:50,026
Hey, little man. What's up?
173
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I'm done with this island.
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There's no food. It's all
in the water somewhere.
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I'm starving. I'm covered
in rashes right now.
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I don't have my jacket anymore.
177
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You want to know why?
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That dude's wearing it.
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Okay, it doesn't even fit him!
180
00:07:01,878 --> 00:07:04,448
And I can't get it back because
he doesn't know English.
181
00:07:04,473 --> 00:07:07,184
So whatever it is that has you all chill
182
00:07:07,209 --> 00:07:09,985
and totally okay with
dying here, I want in.
183
00:07:10,010 --> 00:07:11,526
I want to do your drugs.
184
00:07:11,551 --> 00:07:15,720
Buddy, drugs are for
expansion, not escapesion.
185
00:07:15,964 --> 00:07:19,408
You do not want drugs.
186
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Yes... I... do.
187
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- All right.
- Great.
188
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But you got to promise to expand.
189
00:07:27,523 --> 00:07:29,695
Yeah, yeah, I'll open up my
mind, whatever, expansion.
190
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Dope, dope, dope, dope.
191
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Beautiful.
192
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Follow me.
193
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What? Where are we going?
Why can't we do drugs here?
194
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Easy! First I'm gonna take
you on a vision quest, man.
195
00:07:39,161 --> 00:07:41,480
We're gonna explore your unconscious.
196
00:07:41,505 --> 00:07:42,823
It's gonna be a lot of fun.
197
00:07:42,847 --> 00:07:46,112
I, for one, am very excited
about being inside you.
198
00:07:46,137 --> 00:07:48,384
That's very weird. Don't say that.
199
00:07:49,581 --> 00:07:50,981
Hey, where's my SkyMall?
200
00:07:51,006 --> 00:07:52,734
I lost it. Okay?
201
00:07:52,759 --> 00:07:54,688
Yeesh! What's up with you?
202
00:07:54,713 --> 00:07:57,681
I don't know, Danny. Maybe
it's that we're starving.
203
00:07:57,705 --> 00:08:01,335
Or maybe that it feels like a
hot fart outside all the time.
204
00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:04,589
Owen, come on. It's me. What's going on?
205
00:08:08,112 --> 00:08:13,375
Ever since the crash, I
have not been able to, uh...
206
00:08:14,250 --> 00:08:16,525
- To go.
- To go?
207
00:08:16,550 --> 00:08:18,187
- To evacuate.
- Evacuate, like the plane?
208
00:08:18,212 --> 00:08:19,847
To go, dude. I haven't been able to go.
209
00:08:19,872 --> 00:08:20,952
To go? Where do you have
to go? We're on the island.
210
00:08:20,977 --> 00:08:22,045
We're kind of stuck here.
211
00:08:22,070 --> 00:08:23,272
To go.
212
00:08:23,651 --> 00:08:25,299
- Like poop?
- Yeah, poop.
213
00:08:25,324 --> 00:08:27,208
Oh. Owen, it's been like two weeks.
214
00:08:27,233 --> 00:08:29,175
- Has it been two weeks?
- I think.
215
00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,959
Oh, my G... I know it's
been two weeks, man.
216
00:08:31,984 --> 00:08:32,767
I'm just...
217
00:08:32,792 --> 00:08:35,648
There's people everywhere, always.
218
00:08:35,673 --> 00:08:37,903
And I have to be alone.
219
00:08:38,754 --> 00:08:41,329
All right. Come with me.
220
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:43,968
There's something I need to show you.
221
00:08:44,273 --> 00:08:46,207
[Sighs]
222
00:08:47,856 --> 00:08:49,124
Todd?
223
00:08:49,149 --> 00:08:51,516
I gave you a chance
to tell them yourself.
224
00:08:51,649 --> 00:08:54,295
Fine. Coming in!
225
00:08:56,149 --> 00:08:57,502
Oh, hey.
226
00:08:57,527 --> 00:08:58,368
What's happening?
227
00:08:58,393 --> 00:09:01,335
Look, Jess, the truth is,
228
00:09:01,359 --> 00:09:03,926
I was going to propose
to you on this trip.
229
00:09:03,951 --> 00:09:05,119
I was just...
230
00:09:05,144 --> 00:09:07,119
waiting for the perfect moment.
231
00:09:07,785 --> 00:09:09,711
But then I realized...
232
00:09:10,794 --> 00:09:15,725
that every moment with
you is perfection.
233
00:09:16,682 --> 00:09:18,384
Jess...
234
00:09:18,409 --> 00:09:20,596
will you marry me?
235
00:09:20,621 --> 00:09:22,371
Oh, my God!
236
00:09:22,397 --> 00:09:24,556
Babe, yes, of course!
237
00:09:24,580 --> 00:09:26,355
Dope.
238
00:09:26,381 --> 00:09:29,170
And you won't tell anyone
about the stuff, right?
239
00:09:29,297 --> 00:09:30,631
What?
240
00:09:30,655 --> 00:09:32,292
Oh, God, Jess.
241
00:09:32,563 --> 00:09:34,633
Look, if I didn't save this crap,
242
00:09:34,658 --> 00:09:36,104
the tide would have swept it away.
243
00:09:36,129 --> 00:09:38,976
We can't trust those
dodo brains out there.
244
00:09:39,465 --> 00:09:41,266
We can only trust each other.
245
00:09:41,291 --> 00:09:42,904
I-I guess, I...
246
00:09:42,929 --> 00:09:45,132
Babe, are we a team?
247
00:09:45,463 --> 00:09:47,303
Or not?
248
00:09:50,004 --> 00:09:51,519
Hell yeah, we are.
249
00:09:51,544 --> 00:09:52,543
- Mm-hmm.
- Whoo!
250
00:09:52,568 --> 00:09:54,567
- Ow!
- [Laughs]
251
00:09:54,592 --> 00:09:55,983
I knew you'd say yes.
252
00:09:56,009 --> 00:09:58,383
I knew you'd waffle,
and then you'd cave.
253
00:09:58,820 --> 00:10:01,223
Danny, where are you taking me?
254
00:10:01,248 --> 00:10:01,920
Shh!
255
00:10:01,945 --> 00:10:04,191
Don't shush! I am a grown man.
256
00:10:04,217 --> 00:10:06,320
What could be so secret you shush me?
257
00:10:07,043 --> 00:10:08,865
That.
258
00:10:09,443 --> 00:10:11,249
Mother of God.
259
00:10:11,274 --> 00:10:15,170
The center cabin bathroom.
It just landed here?
260
00:10:15,195 --> 00:10:16,938
I found it a few days ago.
261
00:10:17,038 --> 00:10:19,440
Had I known, I would
have told you earlier.
262
00:10:19,465 --> 00:10:20,899
I'm a shy pooper myself.
263
00:10:20,924 --> 00:10:21,610
Jesus!
264
00:10:21,635 --> 00:10:24,019
- Have you told anyone about this?
- No.
265
00:10:24,044 --> 00:10:26,505
The others, they cannot
find this, Danny.
266
00:10:26,530 --> 00:10:28,586
They're animals. They're animals, Danny!
267
00:10:28,611 --> 00:10:30,301
- They'll tear it apart.
- Owen! Owen, Owen...
268
00:10:30,326 --> 00:10:32,261
You're safe here, okay?
269
00:10:32,286 --> 00:10:35,118
This will just be our little secret.
270
00:10:36,976 --> 00:10:38,870
Danny, thank you.
271
00:10:39,335 --> 00:10:40,991
Thank you.
272
00:10:41,016 --> 00:10:42,462
Yeah.
273
00:10:42,487 --> 00:10:45,431
["Baker Street" plays]
274
00:10:57,334 --> 00:11:00,827
[Farting loudly]
275
00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:04,178
Oh, my God, this is so good.
276
00:11:04,203 --> 00:11:06,987
Yeah. Melty Pop-Tarts are the best.
277
00:11:07,012 --> 00:11:07,848
Mm-hmm.
278
00:11:07,873 --> 00:11:10,169
And anyone who doesn't like
Brown Sugar-Cinnamon...
279
00:11:10,573 --> 00:11:12,297
can go to Hell.
280
00:11:12,322 --> 00:11:13,952
I have to admit,
281
00:11:13,977 --> 00:11:16,384
it is very nice having sun block.
282
00:11:16,409 --> 00:11:18,103
Yeah, well...
283
00:11:18,128 --> 00:11:21,265
maybe your future husband
isn't so selfish after all.
284
00:11:21,289 --> 00:11:23,376
Maybe not.
285
00:11:23,653 --> 00:11:25,552
- [Man screams]
- [Gasps]
286
00:11:25,577 --> 00:11:27,126
What the hell was that?
287
00:11:27,151 --> 00:11:27,630
I don't know.
288
00:11:27,655 --> 00:11:28,863
All right. Hold on.
289
00:11:28,889 --> 00:11:30,289
- Go check it out.
- Hold on.
290
00:11:30,313 --> 00:11:31,647
Stay here.
291
00:11:32,433 --> 00:11:34,178
[Grunting]
292
00:11:34,203 --> 00:11:36,340
[Crowd yelling]
293
00:11:43,319 --> 00:11:45,519
Whoa! Awesome!
294
00:11:45,544 --> 00:11:47,519
What are they fighting over?
295
00:11:47,545 --> 00:11:48,759
Airline pretzels.
296
00:11:48,784 --> 00:11:50,235
They're fighting over airline pretzels?
297
00:11:50,261 --> 00:11:52,589
It's the only food we have left.
298
00:11:53,113 --> 00:11:55,348
Finish him!
299
00:11:56,917 --> 00:11:58,389
Oh! Yeah.
300
00:11:58,414 --> 00:11:59,589
Whoa.
301
00:11:59,614 --> 00:12:01,709
Oh, wow.
302
00:12:01,733 --> 00:12:04,965
These guys must really
be hungry, then, huh?
303
00:12:06,105 --> 00:12:08,188
Is that brown sugar-cinnamon
on your mouth?
304
00:12:08,213 --> 00:12:11,268
What? No, the Pop-Tarts
washed out to sea.
305
00:12:11,293 --> 00:12:12,604
Let me taste it.
306
00:12:12,629 --> 00:12:14,066
- Taste?
- Come on. Let me taste it.
307
00:12:14,091 --> 00:12:15,972
Hey, hey! Hey, no, no, no!
308
00:12:15,997 --> 00:12:19,364
Get off of me, you pervert!
309
00:12:21,927 --> 00:12:24,365
Isn't it glorious, Pack?
310
00:12:24,515 --> 00:12:26,086
You know the Iroquois Nation
311
00:12:26,111 --> 00:12:28,501
used to call their
land chimi-chok chok...
312
00:12:28,634 --> 00:12:30,262
for "sacred mother."
313
00:12:30,287 --> 00:12:32,958
How did they say, "Can we
do the drugs now, please?!"
314
00:12:32,982 --> 00:12:34,317
Look around, man!
315
00:12:34,342 --> 00:12:35,998
Get high on this, brother.
316
00:12:36,023 --> 00:12:37,616
Listen to that waterfall.
317
00:12:37,641 --> 00:12:38,771
Just trees and bullshit.
318
00:12:38,796 --> 00:12:41,206
Just do me a favor. Open one eye.
319
00:12:41,231 --> 00:12:42,638
Open the other eye.
320
00:12:42,663 --> 00:12:43,982
Now see.
321
00:12:44,007 --> 00:12:45,894
Okay? What else do you need?
322
00:12:45,918 --> 00:12:48,053
What about my Audi?! Huh?
323
00:12:48,078 --> 00:12:51,420
I just bought a charcoal-gray Audi.
324
00:12:51,445 --> 00:12:57,319
Buddy, it's just rubber and
metal and whistles and glass.
325
00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:59,447
Who cares about your
Audi? Your legs, dude!
326
00:12:59,472 --> 00:13:00,587
Don't... All right, don't.
327
00:13:00,612 --> 00:13:02,918
Your legs are flesh Audis.
328
00:13:02,943 --> 00:13:04,188
Yeah, I'm out of here, man.
329
00:13:04,213 --> 00:13:07,717
Thank you, Chet, for this
enormous waste of time!
330
00:13:07,742 --> 00:13:09,785
I just want to do drugs, okay?
331
00:13:09,810 --> 00:13:11,145
And you had to be a turd!
332
00:13:11,174 --> 00:13:12,875
I'm going to the beach.
333
00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:14,997
- Hey, Pack?
- What?
334
00:13:15,022 --> 00:13:17,758
You and I are brothers in this
existential search for wisdom,
335
00:13:17,783 --> 00:13:19,740
and I was just wondering... Wow, man!
336
00:13:19,765 --> 00:13:21,381
Dang, that was fast.
337
00:13:21,407 --> 00:13:23,576
[Upbeat music playing]
338
00:13:26,882 --> 00:13:28,150
Sunshine
339
00:13:28,175 --> 00:13:29,566
Don't you hide away
340
00:13:29,591 --> 00:13:31,255
I want sunshine
341
00:13:31,280 --> 00:13:35,806
Each and every day
342
00:13:39,237 --> 00:13:40,662
Sunshine
343
00:13:40,687 --> 00:13:42,462
Ah, I love that bathroom.
344
00:13:42,487 --> 00:13:45,638
I used to hide from
passengers in that bathroom.
345
00:13:45,663 --> 00:13:46,886
- No kidding.
- Yes.
346
00:13:46,911 --> 00:13:49,581
Hey, hey! Hey, whoa!
347
00:13:49,606 --> 00:13:52,518
How did that get there?
348
00:13:54,236 --> 00:13:56,517
Can you imagine if I
took this back to camp?
349
00:13:56,542 --> 00:13:58,377
They'd have found the bathroom for sure.
350
00:13:58,402 --> 00:13:59,230
That cannot happen.
351
00:13:59,255 --> 00:14:00,405
No.
352
00:14:01,244 --> 00:14:05,677
[Both laughing]
353
00:14:06,165 --> 00:14:09,774
354
00:14:18,494 --> 00:14:21,142
Karen: Ooh, beautiful
rock. How did he hide that?
355
00:14:21,167 --> 00:14:22,704
Did he swallow it and crap it out?
356
00:14:22,728 --> 00:14:24,990
No, Karen, he didn't crap it out.
357
00:14:25,015 --> 00:14:26,751
Oh, look, it's Diane from Toledo.
358
00:14:26,776 --> 00:14:29,247
Oh, Jess, I heard you got engaged!
359
00:14:29,272 --> 00:14:30,374
Let me see your ring.
360
00:14:30,399 --> 00:14:31,982
What do you think?
361
00:14:32,007 --> 00:14:34,110
That is my ring?
362
00:14:34,135 --> 00:14:35,271
- What?
- What?
363
00:14:35,296 --> 00:14:37,654
That's my ring. Read the inscription.
364
00:14:37,679 --> 00:14:39,447
"To Diane.
365
00:14:39,472 --> 00:14:42,175
We'll always have Toledo."
366
00:14:42,199 --> 00:14:43,030
See?
367
00:14:43,055 --> 00:14:44,858
But why would Todd have this?
368
00:14:44,883 --> 00:14:46,221
It's got to be a mistake.
369
00:14:46,246 --> 00:14:48,345
Or he didn't bring a ring
370
00:14:48,370 --> 00:14:49,739
'cause he doesn't want to marry you.
371
00:14:50,340 --> 00:14:52,430
Seems pretty obvious.
372
00:14:53,547 --> 00:14:54,919
What?
373
00:14:54,944 --> 00:14:57,047
Why are you looking at me like that?
374
00:14:57,192 --> 00:15:00,657
You're right, Chet, it is glorious.
375
00:15:00,682 --> 00:15:01,807
Cool. How do you feel?
376
00:15:01,832 --> 00:15:03,558
I feel like I'm finally at peace.
377
00:15:03,583 --> 00:15:04,817
Go in deeper, Pack.
378
00:15:04,842 --> 00:15:07,006
What's making you so relaxed?
379
00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:07,979
[Echoing] Drugs.
380
00:15:08,004 --> 00:15:12,090
[Echoing] No, uh, you're
surrendering to the island, bro.
381
00:15:12,116 --> 00:15:13,938
It's mostly drugs.
382
00:15:13,962 --> 00:15:16,098
You don't have any more fancy cars.
383
00:15:16,123 --> 00:15:18,758
You don't have to follow
any stupid corporate ladders
384
00:15:18,783 --> 00:15:19,969
all the way up.
385
00:15:19,994 --> 00:15:21,802
All the hard work you've been doing
386
00:15:21,826 --> 00:15:24,809
for all these years is gone.
387
00:15:24,834 --> 00:15:25,723
It's gone?
388
00:15:25,749 --> 00:15:29,252
And the only thing that's
left is the jungle.
389
00:15:29,277 --> 00:15:35,417
And you... primal-ass,
raw-ass wild Pack.
390
00:15:35,843 --> 00:15:36,975
Wild Pack?
391
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:39,670
You okay, little buddy? Pack?
392
00:15:39,695 --> 00:15:40,996
What did you give me?
393
00:15:41,021 --> 00:15:43,398
The most powerful drug of all, bro...
394
00:15:43,423 --> 00:15:44,773
Truth.
395
00:15:44,798 --> 00:15:46,653
No, seriously. What was it?
396
00:15:46,679 --> 00:15:48,798
Was it, like, MDMA or, like, acid?
397
00:15:48,822 --> 00:15:50,157
Yeah, that was just Claritin, man.
398
00:15:50,182 --> 00:15:52,151
- What?!
- Yeah. I get, like, a runny nose.
399
00:15:52,176 --> 00:15:54,582
You gave me a Claritin?! Why?!
400
00:15:54,607 --> 00:15:56,646
So you'd think I was giving you
drugs and you'd listen to me.
401
00:15:56,671 --> 00:15:57,542
A-doi!
402
00:15:57,567 --> 00:16:00,237
My heart... it's beating very fast.
403
00:16:00,262 --> 00:16:01,230
I can't breathe.
404
00:16:01,255 --> 00:16:04,181
Oh, that sounds like a...
like an actual panic attack.
405
00:16:04,207 --> 00:16:05,420
Oh, there's too many people!
406
00:16:05,444 --> 00:16:06,406
Pack!
407
00:16:06,431 --> 00:16:08,234
[Screaming]
408
00:16:08,259 --> 00:16:09,207
Pack!
409
00:16:09,232 --> 00:16:11,414
Pack, the beach is that way!
410
00:16:11,439 --> 00:16:14,006
[Screaming]
411
00:16:14,031 --> 00:16:16,326
What's going on? Another pretzel fight?
412
00:16:16,351 --> 00:16:17,639
Todd?
413
00:16:18,115 --> 00:16:19,954
Where did you get this ring?
414
00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:21,812
Uh...
415
00:16:22,127 --> 00:16:25,755
the most expensive jewelry
store in all Scottsdale.
416
00:16:25,780 --> 00:16:27,082
You're welcome.
417
00:16:27,543 --> 00:16:29,713
Ow! What's up your butt?
418
00:16:29,738 --> 00:16:31,339
You're a liar, Todd!
419
00:16:31,364 --> 00:16:32,677
That's Diane's ring!
420
00:16:32,702 --> 00:16:34,501
So why are you throwing it in the sand?
421
00:16:34,526 --> 00:16:36,173
You were never gonna propose, Todd.
422
00:16:36,198 --> 00:16:38,790
Why are you so obsessed
with getting married?
423
00:16:38,815 --> 00:16:41,086
I just wanted a commitment, Todd.
424
00:16:41,111 --> 00:16:43,948
A promise that in 10 years,
you're not just gonna trade up.
425
00:16:43,973 --> 00:16:46,017
You're being insane right now.
426
00:16:46,041 --> 00:16:47,881
There's no way I could
trade up from you.
427
00:16:47,906 --> 00:16:48,858
Crowd: Aw!
428
00:16:48,884 --> 00:16:51,561
You're, like, the hottest
chick I ever banged.
429
00:16:51,586 --> 00:16:52,538
Ugh.
430
00:16:52,563 --> 00:16:54,011
Look...
431
00:16:54,036 --> 00:16:56,205
I know I screwed the pooch,
432
00:16:56,230 --> 00:16:59,754
but being engaged to
you today, it was...
433
00:16:59,779 --> 00:17:01,507
rad.
434
00:17:01,603 --> 00:17:05,725
And I don't know why I
was scared before, but...
435
00:17:05,750 --> 00:17:08,425
the moment we get back to Scottsdale,
436
00:17:08,450 --> 00:17:10,269
I am taking you ring shopping.
437
00:17:10,294 --> 00:17:13,709
So until then...
438
00:17:13,734 --> 00:17:18,350
Jess, I love you so friggin' much.
439
00:17:18,565 --> 00:17:21,998
Will you marry me... for reals?
440
00:17:22,023 --> 00:17:25,035
441
00:17:25,060 --> 00:17:26,482
No.
442
00:17:26,508 --> 00:17:28,764
What?! Why not?
443
00:17:28,789 --> 00:17:30,571
Because you lied to me, Todd.
444
00:17:31,060 --> 00:17:33,133
And you stole the camp's stuff.
445
00:17:33,158 --> 00:17:33,869
He did what?!
446
00:17:33,894 --> 00:17:35,726
Wait a minute, so that wasn't
the last bag of pretzels
447
00:17:35,751 --> 00:17:36,998
we were fighting over?
448
00:17:37,023 --> 00:17:38,662
No, no. There are dozens more.
449
00:17:38,687 --> 00:17:40,181
Oh, dear God.
450
00:17:40,206 --> 00:17:42,269
I put Brian in a coma.
451
00:17:42,295 --> 00:17:45,532
Let's go take back what's ours!
452
00:17:45,557 --> 00:17:47,126
Crowd: Yeah!
453
00:17:48,135 --> 00:17:51,613
No, yeah, I was gonna... I
was just holding on to it.
454
00:17:51,639 --> 00:17:52,870
How could you do this to me?
455
00:17:52,895 --> 00:17:54,542
I thought we were a team.
456
00:17:54,567 --> 00:17:56,225
Yeah, I thought so, too, Todd,
457
00:17:56,257 --> 00:17:59,500
until I realized that you
only care about yourself.
458
00:17:59,959 --> 00:18:01,452
Whatever, dude.
459
00:18:01,870 --> 00:18:04,051
I can't wait to be single.
460
00:18:04,076 --> 00:18:09,332
I'm gonna crush so much tail
all over this island, just...
461
00:18:09,697 --> 00:18:11,572
crushing tail.
462
00:18:11,597 --> 00:18:12,583
So much.
463
00:18:12,608 --> 00:18:13,631
Goodbye, Todd.
464
00:18:13,656 --> 00:18:15,592
Tail! I'm gonna...
465
00:18:15,766 --> 00:18:17,559
crush it.
466
00:18:17,584 --> 00:18:20,128
I have no standards right now.
467
00:18:20,153 --> 00:18:22,070
I will hit anything!
468
00:18:22,995 --> 00:18:25,198
Anyone?!
469
00:18:30,328 --> 00:18:31,644
You know, it's weird.
470
00:18:31,669 --> 00:18:33,588
Even though we're eating less and less,
471
00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:35,945
I feel like I'm going more and more.
472
00:18:35,970 --> 00:18:37,820
You know what? I don't even
pee in the woods anymore.
473
00:18:37,845 --> 00:18:39,653
I just use this now. Is that weird?
474
00:18:39,678 --> 00:18:40,790
Hey, no skin off my back.
475
00:18:40,815 --> 00:18:42,622
[Branch snaps]
476
00:18:46,265 --> 00:18:48,894
My God.
477
00:18:48,919 --> 00:18:50,681
Turdhole, you bastard.
478
00:18:50,705 --> 00:18:52,533
You followed us, didn't you?
479
00:18:52,558 --> 00:18:55,082
If I told everybody about this,
480
00:18:55,108 --> 00:18:57,274
they'd have to forgive me for the pile.
481
00:18:57,299 --> 00:18:59,617
Hey, hey, take it easy, Turdhole.
482
00:18:59,643 --> 00:19:00,954
Okay, we're gonna work this out.
483
00:19:00,978 --> 00:19:03,434
I wouldn't be Turdhole
anymore. I'd just be Kurt.
484
00:19:03,466 --> 00:19:04,502
- No, no.
- Turdhole, wait!
485
00:19:04,527 --> 00:19:05,539
I'm so sorry.
486
00:19:05,564 --> 00:19:06,762
We'll stop calling you Turdhole.
487
00:19:06,787 --> 00:19:07,747
We'll call you Kurt.
488
00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:09,706
Everyone!
489
00:19:09,731 --> 00:19:12,836
Danny and Owen have a bathroom out here!
490
00:19:12,861 --> 00:19:14,517
- No!
- No, Turdhole!
491
00:19:14,542 --> 00:19:15,698
- Turdhole!
- Get back here!
492
00:19:15,723 --> 00:19:17,171
Turdhole is a liar!
493
00:19:17,195 --> 00:19:19,972
Turdhole is a liar!
494
00:19:25,354 --> 00:19:27,504
Maybe they won't totally destroy it.
495
00:19:27,529 --> 00:19:29,431
- Man: Shitter's full!
- Oh!
496
00:19:29,456 --> 00:19:33,031
[All groaning]
497
00:19:33,056 --> 00:19:35,407
Well, there's nowhere to hide now.
498
00:19:35,432 --> 00:19:37,374
So where we gonna poop next, man?
499
00:19:37,399 --> 00:19:39,393
There's a bamboo clearing
in the forest. I thought...
500
00:19:39,418 --> 00:19:41,295
I got to get off the island.
I have to get off the island.
501
00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:42,192
I can't stay here.
502
00:19:42,216 --> 00:19:45,361
Danny, I can't stay in the same
place with the same people...
503
00:19:46,682 --> 00:19:48,209
I'm gonna chart the island.
504
00:19:48,234 --> 00:19:49,620
Great idea. I'll come with.
505
00:19:49,645 --> 00:19:51,448
We can poop anywhere, man.
506
00:19:51,727 --> 00:19:53,649
You know, actually, Danny,
507
00:19:53,674 --> 00:19:56,816
I think I'm gonna go
by myself on this one.
508
00:19:56,841 --> 00:19:58,564
Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah.
509
00:19:58,589 --> 00:19:59,877
- Yeah.
- That's just... look.
510
00:19:59,902 --> 00:20:01,230
- That's 'cause I just...
- I would never... oh...
511
00:20:01,255 --> 00:20:02,807
- I understand.
- Thank you.
512
00:20:02,832 --> 00:20:04,601
Of course. Please, please, please.
513
00:20:06,139 --> 00:20:08,582
So where you gonna go?
Like, into the jungle?
514
00:20:08,607 --> 00:20:10,005
Am I gonna go into the jungle?
515
00:20:10,030 --> 00:20:11,246
No. [Laughs]
516
00:20:11,271 --> 00:20:13,711
Uh, no, I don't think so.
I'm gonna stay on the beach.
517
00:20:13,736 --> 00:20:16,341
Can you imagine going into
the jungle by yourself?
518
00:20:16,367 --> 00:20:19,093
Especially at night?
Oh, hell no, no way.
519
00:20:20,479 --> 00:20:22,592
Hello!
520
00:20:22,617 --> 00:20:24,686
Anybody!
521
00:20:24,711 --> 00:20:26,399
Shit! What the [bleep]
522
00:20:26,424 --> 00:20:27,903
What the shit was that?!
523
00:20:27,928 --> 00:20:29,421
Hey, what's going on?
524
00:20:29,445 --> 00:20:30,606
Where's our stuff?!
525
00:20:30,631 --> 00:20:31,646
It was in here!
526
00:20:31,671 --> 00:20:32,706
What is this, a joke?
527
00:20:32,731 --> 00:20:34,374
I told you I don't get many jokes.
528
00:20:34,399 --> 00:20:36,526
It was in here, Karen, I swear.
529
00:20:36,551 --> 00:20:38,767
Todd: Hey, boners!
530
00:20:39,015 --> 00:20:41,167
It's all gone!
531
00:20:41,192 --> 00:20:42,615
I hid it.
532
00:20:42,859 --> 00:20:46,423
From now on, I control the stuff!
533
00:20:46,448 --> 00:20:49,104
God damn it, Todd! Who
do you think you are?!
534
00:20:49,129 --> 00:20:53,801
I'm the friggin' king of the island!
535
00:20:53,826 --> 00:20:56,647
Yeah!
536
00:20:56,672 --> 00:20:59,008
Ooh!
537
00:20:59,033 --> 00:21:01,369
Whoo!
538
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Whoo!
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