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1
00:00:26,059 --> 00:00:27,127
Do you have
a preference here?
2
00:00:27,128 --> 00:00:28,661
Um, I...
3
00:00:28,662 --> 00:00:30,495
I don't, do you?
Okay.
4
00:00:31,731 --> 00:00:35,035
Okay, I'm gonna be honest,
I just don't know anything.
5
00:00:35,036 --> 00:00:36,703
I know absolutely
nothing about wines. Okay.
6
00:00:36,704 --> 00:00:38,104
I'll tell you how I
make my decision. Uh-huh?
7
00:00:38,105 --> 00:00:39,773
I go...
8
00:00:39,774 --> 00:00:41,341
Cheapest? No, the second
cheapest.
9
00:00:41,342 --> 00:00:44,009
This is a date,
okay? I'm trying to...
10
00:00:45,512 --> 00:00:48,415
You know, I'm trying to...
So, second cheapest. Right.
11
00:00:48,416 --> 00:00:49,516
Second cheapest.
Is that cool?
12
00:00:49,517 --> 00:00:51,451
What do you, um...
13
00:00:51,452 --> 00:00:52,884
So, what are you
doing after this?
14
00:00:54,087 --> 00:00:55,655
Do you have plans?
Do you have another...
15
00:00:55,656 --> 00:01:01,694
I'm free, I'm free. Oh, good.
I'm glad to hear that, because...
16
00:01:02,296 --> 00:01:04,364
I don't know, you seem to be having a
good time. I'm having a very good time.
17
00:01:04,365 --> 00:01:05,665
Thanks.
Thank you so much.
18
00:01:05,666 --> 00:01:07,100
Enjoy.
That's the weird thing
19
00:01:07,101 --> 00:01:08,701
that you like to order.
20
00:01:08,702 --> 00:01:11,838
Yeah, I think you'll
love it. It's a liver pate.
21
00:01:11,839 --> 00:01:13,807
Oh, that sounds good.
Liver pate.
22
00:01:13,808 --> 00:01:15,742
It was just,
I wanted to thank you.
23
00:01:15,743 --> 00:01:17,844
Oh, no, no,
no, absolutely.
24
00:01:17,845 --> 00:01:19,712
Don't mind us. Oh, I'm
so sorry, sir. I'm sorry.
25
00:01:19,713 --> 00:01:21,714
I'm so sorry.
26
00:01:21,715 --> 00:01:24,150
You don't have to apologize
that much, he's gonna be okay.
27
00:01:24,151 --> 00:01:27,487
Are you all right?
I'm fine, I'm fine.
28
00:01:27,488 --> 00:01:28,620
What are you, um...
29
00:01:29,522 --> 00:01:30,689
So what do you...
30
00:01:33,294 --> 00:01:36,429
I saw a dash of fear.
So they take the...
31
00:01:36,430 --> 00:01:39,030
Okay, I get a little...
I swear!
32
00:01:44,237 --> 00:01:46,606
Oh, God, I actually feel
completely comfortable,
33
00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:49,774
it's just... Oh.
34
00:02:05,492 --> 00:02:07,225
I...
I can tell you...
35
00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:11,898
This is what it's like.
36
00:02:11,899 --> 00:02:13,733
This is what you can afford.
37
00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:15,700
What I can afford?
Here, I'll clean it up.
38
00:03:13,226 --> 00:03:14,759
What is wrong
with you, dude?
39
00:05:56,856 --> 00:05:58,056
That's really shitty.
40
00:05:59,726 --> 00:06:01,159
No, that's... Nope.
41
00:06:02,028 --> 00:06:03,762
It's already rough.
42
00:06:07,533 --> 00:06:08,933
I not gonna do that,
that's crazy.
43
00:06:23,616 --> 00:06:25,083
Are you fucking kidding me?
44
00:06:25,451 --> 00:06:27,152
Fuck.
45
00:06:32,558 --> 00:06:34,794
Fuck it.
46
00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:35,862
You've reached
the voice mailbox of...
47
00:06:35,863 --> 00:06:37,630
My fat dick!
48
00:06:37,631 --> 00:06:39,799
Jeff! What's up, man?
It's Stan.
49
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:42,769
Uh, been a while! Listen...
50
00:06:42,770 --> 00:06:45,004
Guess who's coming
to Austin tomorrow?
51
00:06:45,005 --> 00:06:49,841
Oh, crazy,
last-minute thing, but, I...
52
00:06:50,510 --> 00:06:51,976
I miss you, bud.
53
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:55,648
So, wondered if you could
pick me up at the airport.
54
00:06:55,649 --> 00:06:57,517
I'll text you the details.
55
00:06:57,518 --> 00:06:59,517
Sorry it's out of the blue,
but, um...
56
00:07:00,153 --> 00:07:01,486
It'll be good to see you,
57
00:07:02,021 --> 00:07:04,889
and your fat dick!
58
00:07:25,678 --> 00:07:27,111
That's me?
59
00:07:27,213 --> 00:07:28,981
Hey!
60
00:07:28,982 --> 00:07:30,548
What the fuck, Stan?
61
00:07:30,950 --> 00:07:32,417
Hey...
62
00:07:36,189 --> 00:07:37,924
What are you doing here?
63
00:07:37,925 --> 00:07:39,759
I'm in town
for the weekend!
64
00:07:39,760 --> 00:07:42,128
The douchebag
isn't picking you up, is he?
65
00:07:42,129 --> 00:07:44,730
You mean Jeff? Don't
say his name, I just ate.
66
00:07:44,731 --> 00:07:46,232
Okay, what's going on?
Are you guys not together?
67
00:07:46,233 --> 00:07:48,468
No, we're not,
actually, ever, ever again.
68
00:07:48,469 --> 00:07:49,868
So, what are you
doing here?
69
00:07:50,803 --> 00:07:52,605
You're joking, right?
What?
70
00:07:52,606 --> 00:07:55,808
Hmm, this is accidental,
you showing up in Austin,
71
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:59,178
this weekend, out of all weekends?
What are you talking about?
72
00:07:59,179 --> 00:08:01,047
Are you trying to lie to
me right now, Stan? What?
73
00:08:01,048 --> 00:08:02,682
Shit.
74
00:08:02,683 --> 00:08:04,048
Who's that?
75
00:08:10,523 --> 00:08:13,125
I just... I miss her, Kara.
I miss her so bad.
76
00:08:13,126 --> 00:08:14,827
And I just felt like if I...
She has made a lot of progress
77
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:17,029
these past six months,
no thanks to you
78
00:08:17,030 --> 00:08:19,966
and your little "second thought,
I'm depressed" blues. I am depressed.
79
00:08:19,967 --> 00:08:22,235
I know you are, but you are not gonna
call her. You're not gonna text her.
80
00:08:22,236 --> 00:08:25,071
No coming by my house,
no El Azteca.
81
00:08:25,072 --> 00:08:26,672
No Dog & Duck. Okay, wait, wait, wait...
82
00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:29,575
Okay, no! No. You are not
here. Do you understand me?
83
00:08:29,576 --> 00:08:30,710
She doesn't own Austin.
84
00:08:30,711 --> 00:08:32,110
No, I do.
85
00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:35,515
It really feels like
you're taking sides here.
86
00:08:35,516 --> 00:08:37,183
Just get the fuck
out of here!
87
00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:39,183
I've gotta get this bitch
to buy me some brisket.
88
00:08:41,087 --> 00:08:42,286
Are you gonna
leave her alone?
89
00:08:43,222 --> 00:08:44,489
It's a small town.
90
00:09:02,009 --> 00:09:03,075
Stan,
I don't know if you can see me,
91
00:09:03,076 --> 00:09:08,514
It says Backdoor Tacos on it, I have my
left hand extended. Can you be more specific?
92
00:09:09,116 --> 00:09:13,786
Mmm, I don't see you. Um... It's
green, there's some tassels on it.
93
00:09:13,787 --> 00:09:16,556
Uh, I'm sitting in the
front seat. Hey, buddy.
94
00:09:16,557 --> 00:09:18,658
Brought the truck?
What happened to your car?
95
00:09:18,659 --> 00:09:21,092
Car was repoed, kind of a
sensitive subject, please get in.
96
00:09:28,302 --> 00:09:32,070
Um, are you okay?
97
00:09:32,104 --> 00:09:33,471
I'm fine.
98
00:09:35,241 --> 00:09:36,641
I like your hair.
99
00:09:37,877 --> 00:09:39,143
I don't.
100
00:09:41,948 --> 00:09:44,282
So, have you seen
Jeff at all?
101
00:09:45,051 --> 00:09:46,384
Nope.
102
00:09:46,953 --> 00:09:48,686
Have you guys talked?
103
00:09:49,288 --> 00:09:50,588
Nope.
104
00:09:54,060 --> 00:09:56,195
You know she has
a superpower?
105
00:09:56,196 --> 00:09:58,030
Did you know that?
She has a superpower.
106
00:09:58,031 --> 00:09:59,165
Oh, yeah?
Yeah!
107
00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:01,601
She can make
a check turn invisible
108
00:10:01,602 --> 00:10:02,767
when it lands on the table.
109
00:10:03,636 --> 00:10:04,804
I swear to God, man.
110
00:10:04,805 --> 00:10:07,239
One time I sat there
for fucking 45 minutes.
111
00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:08,908
I was just curious, I just wanted
to see what was gonna happen.
112
00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:11,077
She's just sipping
her water and chatting.
113
00:10:11,078 --> 00:10:13,980
The waiter comes over and he's like,
"Excuse me, I'd like to close out now. "
114
00:10:13,981 --> 00:10:16,382
And she's just sipping
her water and chatting.
115
00:10:16,383 --> 00:10:17,783
Finally, I pick her fucking
thing up and she says,
116
00:10:17,784 --> 00:10:19,185
"Oh, thank you
so much, sweetie!"
117
00:10:19,186 --> 00:10:21,220
Like all of a sudden,
the check fucking exists.
118
00:10:21,221 --> 00:10:22,587
Fuck that shit!
119
00:10:28,828 --> 00:10:30,229
So, otherwise you've
been good? So good, man.
120
00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:32,865
I love being
single so much.
121
00:10:32,866 --> 00:10:34,734
What about you?
How's New York?
122
00:10:34,735 --> 00:10:36,467
Oh, um...
123
00:10:36,869 --> 00:10:38,169
Fine.
124
00:10:38,671 --> 00:10:39,870
Classes?
125
00:10:40,072 --> 00:10:41,406
Interesting.
126
00:10:41,674 --> 00:10:42,874
Really hard.
127
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:46,811
Dr. Morgan.
So dope!
128
00:10:47,713 --> 00:10:49,682
What?
129
00:10:49,683 --> 00:10:51,384
Yeah, in like six years.
130
00:10:51,385 --> 00:10:54,052
What's up with you,
man, huh?
131
00:10:56,155 --> 00:10:57,688
Coochie, coochie-coo!
Really?
132
00:10:58,958 --> 00:11:00,826
Any guys that are
worth a shit?
133
00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:02,428
Oh, my God, dude,
the girls in LA...
134
00:11:02,429 --> 00:11:04,397
Really?
Woo!
135
00:11:04,398 --> 00:11:07,199
I'm not really in the state of
mind where I think I'd notice.
136
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:09,135
Well, you have come to
Austin, Texas on a good night,
137
00:11:09,136 --> 00:11:11,037
because I've lined
something up for this evening
138
00:11:11,038 --> 00:11:13,873
that will have us
literally eating pussy.
139
00:11:13,874 --> 00:11:16,676
I don't think you mean...
Dude, don't doubt on...
140
00:11:16,677 --> 00:11:18,276
Oh, you'll notice.
141
00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:22,715
Tonight, you'll notice.
142
00:11:22,716 --> 00:11:25,249
What! Get out of my holes!
143
00:11:25,284 --> 00:11:26,784
Oh, man.
144
00:11:40,900 --> 00:11:42,735
Thanks!
145
00:11:42,736 --> 00:11:45,771
No problem. You got it?
Yes.
146
00:11:45,772 --> 00:11:48,407
Okay.
Um, what is that?
147
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:50,710
Oh, yeah.
That's Jeff's shit.
148
00:11:50,711 --> 00:11:52,845
I threw it out.
And he just left it here?
149
00:11:52,846 --> 00:11:54,145
He's too scared to come by.
150
00:11:56,182 --> 00:11:57,448
This is it?
151
00:11:57,783 --> 00:11:59,117
Yep.
152
00:11:59,285 --> 00:12:00,486
Hop out.
153
00:12:00,487 --> 00:12:02,288
Why?
154
00:12:02,289 --> 00:12:03,389
'Cause my door doesn't work,
you have to get out. Still?
155
00:12:03,390 --> 00:12:04,755
Yeah, still.
156
00:12:08,928 --> 00:12:10,395
So, how do you
know this guy?
157
00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:12,230
It's Redge.
158
00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:14,133
Who's Redge?
159
00:12:14,134 --> 00:12:15,566
Redge, he's...
160
00:12:16,135 --> 00:12:17,435
He's old-school.
161
00:12:19,038 --> 00:12:20,973
Yeah,
you spread it.
162
00:12:20,974 --> 00:12:24,110
You spread it and then you fuck
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
163
00:12:24,111 --> 00:12:26,345
What up? Dude, you gotta see this, dude.
164
00:12:26,346 --> 00:12:27,712
Okay, okay.
You have to see this.
165
00:12:28,214 --> 00:12:29,815
Stan, this is Joe.
166
00:12:29,816 --> 00:12:31,016
Yo!
Oh, hey, man.
167
00:12:31,017 --> 00:12:31,984
What's up, dude?
You live here, too?
168
00:12:31,985 --> 00:12:36,322
Neat. This is Redge,
over here. He owns the place.
169
00:12:36,323 --> 00:12:38,491
Hey, what's up... Hollywood!
170
00:12:38,492 --> 00:12:40,426
Hey.
171
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:42,361
I'm gonna sleep on the couch,
you're gonna sleep on the floor.
172
00:12:42,362 --> 00:12:44,864
Cool, thanks, man,
I appreciate it.
173
00:12:44,865 --> 00:12:46,932
Yeah, man,
no problem, just,
174
00:12:46,933 --> 00:12:48,768
the toilet doesn't work so
you've gotta pee-pee in the sink
175
00:12:48,769 --> 00:12:49,900
and poo-poo at 7-Eleven.
176
00:12:50,269 --> 00:12:51,502
Fantastic.
177
00:12:52,204 --> 00:12:54,405
Joseph, let's see it.
178
00:13:22,568 --> 00:13:23,935
Yeah!
179
00:13:26,338 --> 00:13:28,940
She's so fucking wet,
look at that!
180
00:13:31,278 --> 00:13:34,914
Fuck, yeah. Now, turn
around, make her eat your ass.
181
00:13:34,915 --> 00:13:36,247
Ass-eating time,
munch it.
182
00:13:36,448 --> 00:13:37,915
It's time.
183
00:13:38,250 --> 00:13:40,152
Oh, yeah, fuck her.
184
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:44,190
Ahh! Yeah, that's it,
that's it! Ooh!
185
00:13:44,191 --> 00:13:46,525
Okay, yeah. Yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
186
00:13:46,526 --> 00:13:48,227
Yeah.
All right, all right.
187
00:13:48,228 --> 00:13:49,929
That was fun.
What was that?
188
00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:51,329
Oh, he nailed it.
It's air sex.
189
00:13:52,431 --> 00:13:54,099
What is that, air sex? You
don't know what air sex...
190
00:13:54,100 --> 00:13:55,868
I thought you said
he was from LA?
191
00:13:55,869 --> 00:13:57,203
It's kind of a big deal. Okay.
192
00:13:57,204 --> 00:13:58,971
Focus on me
right now, guys.
193
00:13:58,972 --> 00:14:01,806
Does this take place
on the astral plane?
194
00:14:02,208 --> 00:14:03,843
Or in a fantasy world?
195
00:14:03,844 --> 00:14:05,444
No, this happens
here in real life.
196
00:14:05,445 --> 00:14:07,413
Do the laws of physics
apply here? Absolutely.
197
00:14:07,414 --> 00:14:08,848
Here's what
I'm seeing.
198
00:14:08,849 --> 00:14:10,249
Whoa, what are you
seeing? I'm seeing you
199
00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:12,051
laying on the ground
being sixty-nined,
200
00:14:12,052 --> 00:14:14,253
and then when you say
"Have her eat your ass. "
201
00:14:14,254 --> 00:14:16,255
You sit up, she's
magically underneath you.
202
00:14:16,256 --> 00:14:18,324
Are you fucking a ghost?
Let's all slow down.
203
00:14:18,325 --> 00:14:20,960
Nobody's done a fucking ghost routine,
204
00:14:20,961 --> 00:14:23,596
that's a good idea, we should do a
ghost routine. Listen, okay, that's fine,
205
00:14:23,597 --> 00:14:25,865
but if you're gonna fuck a ghost, we
have to introduce in the first act,
206
00:14:25,866 --> 00:14:27,967
not the third act,
that you're fucking a ghost.
207
00:14:27,968 --> 00:14:30,502
Unless we're doing an
M. Night Shyamalama thing...
208
00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:32,703
We are not gonna do an
M. Night Shyamalama thing!
209
00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:36,707
Did I tell you how many guys I
slept with after our last breakup?
210
00:14:37,042 --> 00:14:38,542
No?
211
00:14:38,978 --> 00:14:40,278
Seven.
212
00:14:40,579 --> 00:14:42,346
Wow!
213
00:14:42,381 --> 00:14:43,848
Yep.
214
00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:46,552
That's kind of
a lot, right?
215
00:14:46,553 --> 00:14:49,221
It's... It's not a little.
216
00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:52,024
So you're gonna do that in
front of hundreds of people?
217
00:14:52,025 --> 00:14:54,059
Yeah.
Okay. That's ridiculous.
218
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:55,194
Right. You do know that, right?
219
00:14:55,195 --> 00:14:56,562
No, no, I do,
I do, I do.
220
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,530
I know that it's
ridiculous to win the finals
221
00:14:58,531 --> 00:15:00,633
and get a month
of free alcohol.
222
00:15:00,634 --> 00:15:02,268
Horny college girls knowing
that we know how to fuck?
223
00:15:02,269 --> 00:15:03,402
It's silly, actually.
224
00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:05,537
Okay, guys, order up!
225
00:15:05,538 --> 00:15:08,107
Backdoor Tacos never die!
226
00:15:08,108 --> 00:15:09,642
They just multiply.
227
00:15:09,643 --> 00:15:11,977
Ah, muchas gracias!
228
00:15:11,978 --> 00:15:15,079
Look, man, can we just go to a
regular bar, like the Dog & Duck?
229
00:15:15,648 --> 00:15:18,083
The Dog & Duck
suck and fuck?
230
00:15:18,084 --> 00:15:19,652
Fuck that place.
231
00:15:19,653 --> 00:15:21,186
What do you mean,
"Fuck that place"?
232
00:15:21,187 --> 00:15:23,988
He lost it in the divorce.
Shut the fuck up, Joey.
233
00:15:25,391 --> 00:15:27,393
Just wanted some other
dick, you know? Yeah...
234
00:15:27,394 --> 00:15:29,662
Like, I live
with Jeff's dick.
235
00:15:29,663 --> 00:15:31,964
It's just so familiar.
236
00:15:31,965 --> 00:15:33,399
I see his pee coming
out of it and I'm like,
237
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,167
"Oh, I have sex
with that sometimes. "
238
00:15:35,168 --> 00:15:37,136
It's like an appliance.
239
00:15:37,137 --> 00:15:39,138
Like a microwave.
240
00:15:39,139 --> 00:15:42,241
Like a tiny
little microwave.
241
00:15:42,242 --> 00:15:44,376
It's tiny?
242
00:15:44,377 --> 00:15:46,612
Oh, like the fist of a preemie. Ew.
243
00:15:46,613 --> 00:15:49,046
Uh, uh, uh, uh.
244
00:15:49,648 --> 00:15:51,682
Stan's is...
Is what?
245
00:15:51,717 --> 00:15:53,218
Is huge?
246
00:15:53,219 --> 00:15:55,220
No.
Is hairy?
247
00:15:55,221 --> 00:15:57,122
No.
Is it all crooked?
248
00:15:57,123 --> 00:15:58,524
What?
249
00:15:58,525 --> 00:16:00,659
Hey, I once had sex
with this guy
250
00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:02,995
whose dick was so crooked it
looked like a question mark
251
00:16:02,996 --> 00:16:04,495
whenever he got hard.
252
00:16:05,332 --> 00:16:07,965
Oh! What do you
want to know, little lady?
253
00:16:09,301 --> 00:16:10,935
No, it's...
254
00:16:12,571 --> 00:16:13,572
It's perfect.
255
00:16:13,573 --> 00:16:15,341
No, Cath,
256
00:16:15,342 --> 00:16:17,142
"Was", okay?
257
00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:18,210
You gotta put that dick
in the past tense.
258
00:16:18,211 --> 00:16:20,644
No, I know.
259
00:16:21,714 --> 00:16:25,050
Losing the sex stuff
and the relationship stuff,
260
00:16:25,051 --> 00:16:26,784
it's been hard.
261
00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:31,457
But losing the friendship's
been the worst.
262
00:16:31,458 --> 00:16:34,059
And I could really use a
friend up there right now.
263
00:16:34,060 --> 00:16:35,593
Oh, buddy.
264
00:16:37,229 --> 00:16:40,099
Sometimes I just wanna
check in with him, you know.
265
00:16:40,100 --> 00:16:41,533
Yeah.
266
00:16:41,534 --> 00:16:43,535
Hear about
what he's doing.
267
00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:44,603
Okay, come here.
268
00:16:44,604 --> 00:16:46,404
Stand here.
269
00:16:47,272 --> 00:16:48,640
No reason to be
nervous, okay?
270
00:16:48,641 --> 00:16:50,709
We're gonna do something
very, very simple.
271
00:16:50,710 --> 00:16:53,078
It's not even sexual,
okay? I just want you to
272
00:16:53,079 --> 00:16:54,512
do a little
exercise with me.
273
00:16:55,114 --> 00:16:57,049
Huh?
274
00:16:57,050 --> 00:16:59,284
We're just doing some Tai
Chi, that's all this is.
275
00:16:59,285 --> 00:17:01,186
Is this weird?
Yeah, this is weird.
276
00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,188
Well, that's on you,
my friend.
277
00:17:03,189 --> 00:17:05,791
Okay. Now, we're just gonna
make a little adjustment.
278
00:17:05,792 --> 00:17:09,094
I just want you to turn
your hands inward, like that.
279
00:17:09,095 --> 00:17:11,130
Huh? Now look
what happened!
280
00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:12,698
There it is!
What's all this, now?
281
00:17:12,699 --> 00:17:15,134
Oh, my gosh, we're having
sex with a beautiful woman.
282
00:17:15,135 --> 00:17:17,202
Wow, so beautiful. Yeah,
man, just go with that.
283
00:17:17,203 --> 00:17:19,104
Now just
elaborate on that.
284
00:17:19,105 --> 00:17:21,440
You can be
the best sex guy ever,
285
00:17:21,441 --> 00:17:23,809
your dick can be 30 feet
Daredevil, man.
286
00:17:23,810 --> 00:17:26,278
Dude, go with that!
Aah! Aah!
287
00:17:26,279 --> 00:17:29,048
Wet her whistle, man.
Jingle her bells.
288
00:17:29,049 --> 00:17:31,417
My dick is so big!
289
00:17:31,418 --> 00:17:33,318
This is her face, that's
her ass, go. You see that?
290
00:17:33,319 --> 00:17:34,686
Oh, it's good, it's good,
you're really good.
291
00:17:34,687 --> 00:17:36,588
Help, get into it, though,
like, join me.
292
00:17:36,589 --> 00:17:38,557
'Cause that's her ass and this is
her... That's okay, you do this one.
293
00:17:38,558 --> 00:17:41,060
I'll take the next one,
you do this one. Ooh!
294
00:17:41,061 --> 00:17:42,693
Come on.
Yeah, there it is.
295
00:17:44,296 --> 00:17:46,265
That was her head, I think.
No, I've got her head.
296
00:17:46,266 --> 00:17:47,800
You're going in the ass. Okay.
297
00:17:47,801 --> 00:17:49,334
Look. Let's try
something over here.
298
00:17:49,335 --> 00:17:50,668
Okay.
299
00:17:51,703 --> 00:17:53,806
Oh! You are so
fucking pretty, Cathy!
300
00:17:53,807 --> 00:17:55,808
What? No!
Yeah!
301
00:17:55,809 --> 00:17:58,310
I'm serious, dude.
302
00:17:58,311 --> 00:17:59,845
This is gonna sell like crazy
once I get it on my site.
303
00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:01,780
Of course it will!
304
00:18:01,781 --> 00:18:04,181
It's gorgeous!
305
00:18:05,285 --> 00:18:06,750
Oh.
306
00:18:09,221 --> 00:18:10,387
Who's that?
307
00:18:11,623 --> 00:18:13,257
Just some loser
who won't leave me alone.
308
00:18:14,626 --> 00:18:16,628
All right.
309
00:18:16,629 --> 00:18:18,729
Work it, bitch!
310
00:18:37,249 --> 00:18:39,284
But it's true, though,
in Africa they...
311
00:18:39,285 --> 00:18:41,186
There's many cultures,
there's a bunch of countries...
312
00:18:41,187 --> 00:18:43,255
Hey. Hey, guys?
Why don't we just, like,
313
00:18:43,256 --> 00:18:45,290
hit up a bunch
of different bars?
314
00:18:45,291 --> 00:18:47,626
You know, just stop at a bunch
of places, get shots at each one,
315
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,761
I'll buy shots.
316
00:18:49,762 --> 00:18:52,231
Stan, I understand if you want
to sit out on the bench tonight.
317
00:18:52,232 --> 00:18:53,832
I get that you have body-shame
issues, you've got fat knees,
318
00:18:53,833 --> 00:18:56,135
that's not your fault,
all right?
319
00:18:56,136 --> 00:18:58,737
But it doesn't mean you can't still
bang some strange this evening, buddy.
320
00:18:58,738 --> 00:19:00,405
Okay, yeah. It's been
a long time
321
00:19:00,406 --> 00:19:01,707
since you entered
the field of battle,
322
00:19:01,708 --> 00:19:03,575
that's true.
Uh-huh.
323
00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:04,510
And you're worried about
hatching out of your shell
324
00:19:04,511 --> 00:19:05,878
before you're
fully incubated.
325
00:19:05,879 --> 00:19:07,546
Nobody likes preemies,
they're disgusting.
326
00:19:07,547 --> 00:19:09,615
That's not
gonna be an issue,
327
00:19:09,616 --> 00:19:11,517
because I'm gonna give you a couple
of arrows to put into your quiver.
328
00:19:11,518 --> 00:19:13,352
That's going to help you
to bring down the big game.
329
00:19:13,353 --> 00:19:15,387
Maybe pick one metaphor?
Okay.
330
00:19:15,388 --> 00:19:16,822
I'm just assuming that
you... Follow me here, Stan.
331
00:19:16,823 --> 00:19:18,891
Girls guard the vagina.
332
00:19:18,892 --> 00:19:19,925
Yeah, they guard it
with their life.
333
00:19:19,926 --> 00:19:22,761
Okay? So we have
to guard the penis.
334
00:19:22,762 --> 00:19:25,197
Oh, okay. Like a hockey goal, you know?
335
00:19:25,198 --> 00:19:26,632
He doesn't like metaphors.
The puck is the vagina.
336
00:19:26,633 --> 00:19:27,765
He doesn't like them, so
we're not gonna use metaphors.
337
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,469
Stan?
338
00:19:30,470 --> 00:19:32,871
You've gotta let them know
they can't have this.
339
00:19:32,872 --> 00:19:36,375
Because people always want what they
can't have. What they can't have...
340
00:19:36,376 --> 00:19:39,711
See? So, you've gotta be an asshole!
341
00:19:39,712 --> 00:19:42,214
Yeah, but not a giant asshole. Right.
342
00:19:42,215 --> 00:19:43,549
You can't be
an unfuckable asshole,
343
00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:44,750
you have
to be discreet.
344
00:19:44,751 --> 00:19:47,619
You have to
say things to women
345
00:19:47,620 --> 00:19:49,755
that appear nice at
first... Very discreet.
346
00:19:49,756 --> 00:19:52,756
Right. They appear nice, but
really, they're kind of mean.
347
00:20:11,476 --> 00:20:13,344
Do y'all have a tab?
Jenkins.
348
00:20:20,686 --> 00:20:24,656
Woo, that is a serious
STD sandwich.
349
00:20:24,657 --> 00:20:27,259
Who cares about them,
this is our night, right?
350
00:20:27,260 --> 00:20:29,461
Mmm-hmm.
Here is to home.
351
00:20:29,462 --> 00:20:31,997
This will always be home,
no matter what.
352
00:20:31,998 --> 00:20:34,366
Boom! ATX in the hizzle!
353
00:20:34,367 --> 00:20:36,401
Little bit weird!
354
00:20:36,402 --> 00:20:39,271
How's it going, ladies?
355
00:20:39,272 --> 00:20:40,572
Wow, you girls
look really pretty.
356
00:20:40,573 --> 00:20:42,608
I'm sorry, are you lost?
357
00:20:42,609 --> 00:20:44,910
You're
funny, I like your hair.
358
00:20:44,911 --> 00:20:46,578
And your tats.
You wanna dance?
359
00:20:46,579 --> 00:20:48,547
Mmm, no.
360
00:20:48,548 --> 00:20:50,515
Oh. Why?
Is your boyfriend here?
361
00:20:50,516 --> 00:20:52,251
I don't have a boyfriend.
362
00:20:52,252 --> 00:20:55,020
He's an idiot!
363
00:20:55,021 --> 00:20:57,889
Okay, so,
for example, um...
364
00:20:57,890 --> 00:20:59,825
You would say something like,
"That's a beautiful dress you have on,
365
00:20:59,826 --> 00:21:01,627
"it really makes
your ass look small. "
366
00:21:01,628 --> 00:21:03,729
Or, like my friend says,
"You're a fat ass,
367
00:21:03,730 --> 00:21:06,298
"but you're really not
that big. "
368
00:21:06,299 --> 00:21:07,699
Or, "Hey, is that
a beauty mark,
369
00:21:07,700 --> 00:21:09,001
"or do you just have
some shit on your face?"
370
00:21:09,002 --> 00:21:10,802
That's really good.
371
00:21:10,803 --> 00:21:13,338
That's really...
Can I use that?
372
00:21:13,339 --> 00:21:15,773
Yeah, of course.
That's a good line.
373
00:21:16,508 --> 00:21:17,943
Essentially, what
we're doing, Stan,
374
00:21:17,944 --> 00:21:19,911
is we're lowering
their self-esteem
375
00:21:19,912 --> 00:21:21,313
so that then they look
to us for validation
376
00:21:21,314 --> 00:21:23,382
and we can...
377
00:21:23,383 --> 00:21:28,520
you tell girls they're ugly so
they'll want to have sex with you.
378
00:21:28,521 --> 00:21:29,853
Yeah.
In a nutshell.
379
00:21:50,809 --> 00:21:53,345
Oh! Geez, um... Oh, I'm
so sorry, are you okay?
380
00:21:53,346 --> 00:21:55,881
Yeah, it's... I...
Oh, my goodness, here.
381
00:21:55,882 --> 00:21:57,416
Take that for you.
Thank you.
382
00:21:57,417 --> 00:21:58,684
I'm so sorry, can I
get you another drink?
383
00:21:58,685 --> 00:22:00,619
Uh, no, that's okay...
384
00:22:00,620 --> 00:22:02,721
I mean, I think you look
like you need another drink.
385
00:22:02,722 --> 00:22:04,656
Um...
386
00:22:04,657 --> 00:22:06,858
Here, have some of mine.
No, I'm fine.
387
00:22:06,859 --> 00:22:08,192
No, no, no,
no roofies in this one.
388
00:22:12,497 --> 00:22:13,598
On that note,
I'm gonna leave you.
389
00:22:13,599 --> 00:22:14,998
You know what?
390
00:22:17,803 --> 00:22:19,538
You killed that.
Oh.
391
00:22:19,539 --> 00:22:21,406
Excuse me,
392
00:22:21,407 --> 00:22:24,174
two vodka tonics, please. No,
actually, I was just about to, um...
393
00:22:25,010 --> 00:22:27,444
To go.
Oh, are you?
394
00:22:28,880 --> 00:22:30,816
I wonder if I could possibly
make this any more awkward.
395
00:22:30,817 --> 00:22:33,917
No, no, it's not you,
it's just...
396
00:22:34,953 --> 00:22:36,854
Oh, my God,
my friend is...
397
00:22:37,723 --> 00:22:39,358
Oh, humping my brother
on the dance floor.
398
00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:42,126
What? That's
your brother?
399
00:22:42,461 --> 00:22:44,796
Unfortunately, yes.
400
00:22:44,797 --> 00:22:48,734
Wow, that just made
this way more awkward.
401
00:22:48,735 --> 00:22:51,435
I knew we could do it.
Here, cheers.
402
00:22:58,944 --> 00:23:00,879
Who's this?
403
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:02,681
Um...
404
00:23:02,682 --> 00:23:03,849
Give the girl
some room.
405
00:23:03,850 --> 00:23:05,249
You got a text.
406
00:23:08,153 --> 00:23:11,088
Oh, fuck.
407
00:23:22,801 --> 00:23:25,269
Oh, fuck, yeah!
408
00:23:26,037 --> 00:23:28,305
Oh, yeah!
409
00:23:31,042 --> 00:23:32,843
Oh!
410
00:23:38,850 --> 00:23:40,585
Oh, we have
an asshole!
411
00:23:40,586 --> 00:23:42,286
He's blowing right
into an asshole!
412
00:23:42,487 --> 00:23:43,921
Unbelievable!
413
00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:51,395
Now he's getting another guy
to suck the weed out of the ass!
414
00:23:59,137 --> 00:24:01,072
All right.
Hey, hey.
415
00:24:01,073 --> 00:24:02,874
Now look, all right,
all right, all right.
416
00:24:02,875 --> 00:24:05,577
Now, look. I've shown
you what I can do up here.
417
00:24:05,578 --> 00:24:07,044
Huh, huh, huh?
418
00:24:07,979 --> 00:24:10,882
Now it's time
for you to show me
419
00:24:10,883 --> 00:24:13,718
what you can do, huh?
Come on.
420
00:24:13,719 --> 00:24:15,620
Huh? Oh, come on.
421
00:24:15,621 --> 00:24:16,988
Oh, come on, come on,
no, don't sit down.
422
00:24:16,989 --> 00:24:18,590
Dude, you've gotta get
up there, it's your time.
423
00:24:18,591 --> 00:24:20,058
You've been practicing,
you're the man.
424
00:24:20,059 --> 00:24:21,560
You're the diamond in
the rough, you can shine!
425
00:24:21,561 --> 00:24:24,062
The air wants to fuck,
426
00:24:24,063 --> 00:24:26,465
and you must fuck the air.
427
00:24:26,466 --> 00:24:31,837
You must fuck the air.
428
00:24:31,838 --> 00:24:34,105
You must fuck the air!
429
00:24:34,106 --> 00:24:35,974
You must fuck the air!
430
00:24:35,975 --> 00:24:38,141
You must fuck the air!
What are you doing?
431
00:24:43,582 --> 00:24:46,083
Okay, so,
that's why you came.
432
00:24:48,253 --> 00:24:50,287
I will fuck the air!
433
00:24:52,191 --> 00:24:53,323
Now I know
why you're here.
434
00:24:54,493 --> 00:24:56,059
I was gonna
tell you, dude, I just...
435
00:25:00,232 --> 00:25:02,701
Oh, yeah.
436
00:25:02,702 --> 00:25:04,635
Fuck the air
like a stallion, my friend!
437
00:25:05,505 --> 00:25:07,138
Can I say something?
438
00:25:07,139 --> 00:25:09,107
Oh, speak.
439
00:25:09,108 --> 00:25:11,943
Uh, this is gonna go out
to my ex-girlfriend
440
00:25:11,944 --> 00:25:14,112
who recently kicked me
out of my house.
441
00:25:14,113 --> 00:25:15,580
Ooh.
Yeah. Yeah.
442
00:25:15,581 --> 00:25:17,015
Hey. Kara Jenkins?
443
00:25:17,016 --> 00:25:18,517
You can't get this dick!
444
00:25:18,518 --> 00:25:21,019
That's what's up!
445
00:25:21,020 --> 00:25:22,587
Put
your hands together
446
00:25:22,588 --> 00:25:26,957
for Mr. Fuckasaurus Sex!
447
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:51,114
Yeah.
Do it.
448
00:26:01,693 --> 00:26:02,859
What you got
down there?
449
00:26:30,889 --> 00:26:32,357
I'm such a terrible friend.
450
00:26:32,358 --> 00:26:34,458
No, you're not.
451
00:26:35,093 --> 00:26:37,461
No.
Yes, I am.
452
00:26:37,963 --> 00:26:39,898
I am.
453
00:26:39,899 --> 00:26:42,399
Well, maybe today,
but not usually.
454
00:26:43,001 --> 00:26:45,168
It's just so hard!
455
00:26:45,670 --> 00:26:47,606
It's so hard,
456
00:26:47,607 --> 00:26:50,173
it's so hard to be
friends with both of you,
457
00:26:51,109 --> 00:26:53,176
I love you both
so much!
458
00:26:54,613 --> 00:26:57,215
Don't cry, sweet girl.
I love you, Cathy.
459
00:26:57,216 --> 00:26:58,917
Oh, Ralphie's here.
460
00:26:58,918 --> 00:27:01,786
That's it, that's it.
461
00:27:01,787 --> 00:27:05,223
Why am I such a bitch sometimes?
Oh, no, you're not a bitch.
462
00:27:05,224 --> 00:27:08,326
Mmm, you're sexy.
You're so sweet...
463
00:27:08,327 --> 00:27:10,195
What the fuck?
What are you doing?
464
00:27:10,196 --> 00:27:11,830
Kissing your tears away.
465
00:27:11,831 --> 00:27:14,899
You think your fish face is
gonna make me feel better?
466
00:27:14,900 --> 00:27:16,266
Come on, buddy.
467
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:24,541
So he came all the way
to Austin just to see me?
468
00:27:26,778 --> 00:27:29,781
Half creepy,
half romantic.
469
00:27:29,782 --> 00:27:31,281
Good old Stan.
470
00:27:33,284 --> 00:27:35,220
I cannot see him tonight.
471
00:27:35,221 --> 00:27:37,355
I'm not ready.
472
00:27:37,356 --> 00:27:38,289
She's just like
a young Goldie Hawn.
473
00:27:38,290 --> 00:27:40,025
Okay.
474
00:27:40,026 --> 00:27:42,260
In Wildcats.
I mean, I see it.
475
00:27:42,261 --> 00:27:43,995
Just, so hot.
The coach, right?
476
00:27:43,996 --> 00:27:46,097
So feisty!
477
00:27:46,098 --> 00:27:47,264
Do you
wanna go home?
478
00:27:48,033 --> 00:27:51,601
No! No, that is not
why I came here.
479
00:27:52,771 --> 00:27:54,773
I came here
to have fun.
480
00:27:54,774 --> 00:27:56,274
To have a good time.
481
00:27:56,275 --> 00:27:59,811
Word up.
482
00:27:59,812 --> 00:28:02,345
Let's just go someplace he'd
never go in a million years.
483
00:28:04,315 --> 00:28:06,116
What about them?
484
00:28:12,457 --> 00:28:15,460
Is it just me, or doesn't
he look like that guy
485
00:28:15,461 --> 00:28:17,194
from Midnight Cowboy?
486
00:28:17,862 --> 00:28:19,796
Like Jon Voight.
487
00:28:21,766 --> 00:28:23,400
I love you.
488
00:28:36,081 --> 00:28:37,647
That's a nice ass, huh?
489
00:28:39,050 --> 00:28:40,385
Did you just say
"nice ass"?
490
00:28:40,386 --> 00:28:41,853
No.
491
00:28:41,854 --> 00:28:43,288
Really, that wasn't you?
492
00:28:43,289 --> 00:28:46,124
I... No, I would
never say that.
493
00:28:46,125 --> 00:28:47,624
Oh, well, thanks.
494
00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:51,796
Not that you don't have one,
I'm just... See, you were!
495
00:28:51,797 --> 00:28:53,830
You were looking at my ass. I wasn't!
496
00:28:57,402 --> 00:28:59,269
What happened? Dropped
my phone down there.
497
00:29:02,774 --> 00:29:04,375
Can you not reach it?
498
00:29:04,376 --> 00:29:07,444
Well, do you see it
in my hand?
499
00:29:11,149 --> 00:29:12,417
You don't
have to do that.
500
00:29:12,418 --> 00:29:14,184
It's fine.
501
00:29:15,887 --> 00:29:18,123
I've been out here for like, 20
minutes and nobody's offered to help.
502
00:29:18,124 --> 00:29:20,423
Yeah, people suck.
They really do.
503
00:29:22,127 --> 00:29:23,760
Nice ass, by the way.
504
00:29:27,065 --> 00:29:28,433
Wait, hold on.
Maybe this comes off.
505
00:29:28,434 --> 00:29:30,368
Uh, I don't know...
506
00:29:30,369 --> 00:29:31,801
Yeah...
507
00:29:32,303 --> 00:29:33,537
Thanks.
508
00:29:35,473 --> 00:29:37,207
Um...
509
00:29:39,310 --> 00:29:42,914
Right. Oh, hold on, you
might step on it, so...
510
00:29:42,915 --> 00:29:44,783
Can I use your phone?
Can I call it? Yep.
511
00:29:44,784 --> 00:29:45,916
I'll see it
light up, and...
512
00:29:46,151 --> 00:29:47,819
Thanks.
513
00:29:47,820 --> 00:29:50,321
213, LA, really?
514
00:29:50,322 --> 00:29:51,523
Yeah, why?
515
00:29:51,524 --> 00:29:53,890
Whoa!
516
00:29:54,159 --> 00:29:55,592
Wicked.
517
00:29:56,795 --> 00:29:57,994
Oh, okay, uh...
518
00:29:59,497 --> 00:30:00,730
Got it!
519
00:30:02,967 --> 00:30:04,267
Oh, yes!
520
00:30:06,337 --> 00:30:07,472
Thanks.
521
00:30:07,473 --> 00:30:09,239
Yeah. Oh, ah...
522
00:30:11,276 --> 00:30:12,310
You got some...
523
00:30:12,311 --> 00:30:14,211
Oh, okay.
524
00:30:15,580 --> 00:30:16,913
What?
Nothing.
525
00:30:17,949 --> 00:30:19,250
Well, thank you.
Yeah.
526
00:30:19,251 --> 00:30:20,750
You are a good Samaritan.
527
00:30:24,456 --> 00:30:26,890
Is that yours?
528
00:30:27,192 --> 00:30:29,060
This?
529
00:30:29,061 --> 00:30:31,930
No, I just found it and I
thought, it looked pretty cool.
530
00:30:31,931 --> 00:30:34,132
So, you are a musician?
531
00:30:34,133 --> 00:30:38,002
Yeah, I play the cello
and I sing.
532
00:30:38,003 --> 00:30:41,206
Cello and vocals! I've never
seen anyone do that. That's cool.
533
00:30:41,207 --> 00:30:42,607
Well, if you come to
the Ale House tomorrow
534
00:30:42,608 --> 00:30:45,310
you could be the only
person in Austin to see it.
535
00:30:45,311 --> 00:30:46,845
I just played a show
to a bartender.
536
00:30:46,846 --> 00:30:48,245
Oh, that sucks.
537
00:30:48,479 --> 00:30:50,281
I'd love to come.
538
00:30:50,282 --> 00:30:51,748
Uh, that would be awesome.
539
00:30:52,584 --> 00:30:55,186
Yeah. I, um...
540
00:30:55,187 --> 00:30:56,588
I don't really have a car
here, so I'm a little bit...
541
00:30:56,589 --> 00:30:58,523
Oh, don't worry about it.
542
00:30:58,524 --> 00:31:01,926
If you can't make it, totally
fine, but call me because
543
00:31:01,927 --> 00:31:03,660
I think I owe you
a thank-you drink.
544
00:31:05,296 --> 00:31:07,564
Okay, did you wanna
give me your, uh...
545
00:31:08,499 --> 00:31:10,300
213, remember?
546
00:31:11,536 --> 00:31:13,303
Oh, yeah. Yeah, 213.
547
00:31:23,948 --> 00:31:25,582
Are you texting
your boyfriend?
548
00:31:25,917 --> 00:31:26,985
Mmm-hmm.
549
00:31:26,986 --> 00:31:28,184
Tell him it's over.
550
00:31:28,653 --> 00:31:30,188
Tell him you found
a real man.
551
00:31:30,189 --> 00:31:31,421
No, Ralphie.
552
00:31:32,423 --> 00:31:35,226
That right there,
that is a real man.
553
00:31:35,227 --> 00:31:38,663
How you're related
to him, I do not know.
554
00:31:38,664 --> 00:31:41,765
Maybe your mom forgot to put in her diaphragm
while she was working the donkey show.
555
00:31:44,669 --> 00:31:46,471
Yeah, ha-ha, ha-ha.
556
00:31:46,472 --> 00:31:48,339
Go get me another
drink, Eeyore.
557
00:31:48,340 --> 00:31:49,606
You got it.
558
00:32:07,525 --> 00:32:08,925
Whoo!
559
00:32:16,334 --> 00:32:18,336
I can't believe you
know how to do that.
560
00:32:18,337 --> 00:32:19,502
Lessons for two years.
561
00:32:20,438 --> 00:32:21,973
Ready for a drink?
Oh.
562
00:32:21,974 --> 00:32:23,373
Um, sure.
Okay.
563
00:32:33,217 --> 00:32:37,120
So, um, what made you decide
to take two-stepping lessons?
564
00:32:40,058 --> 00:32:42,625
Well, not what, who.
565
00:32:43,328 --> 00:32:44,661
Who?
566
00:32:47,699 --> 00:32:49,666
Oh.
What?
567
00:32:50,735 --> 00:32:51,935
My ex-wife.
568
00:32:52,603 --> 00:32:54,070
Two Buds, please.
Oh!
569
00:32:56,240 --> 00:32:57,275
Okay.
570
00:32:57,276 --> 00:32:59,110
Yeah.
571
00:32:59,111 --> 00:33:00,645
Could've used a little record
skipping sound effect right there.
572
00:33:00,646 --> 00:33:02,613
No, no, no, no.
Not at all.
573
00:33:02,614 --> 00:33:03,681
Not at all.
574
00:33:03,682 --> 00:33:04,948
Divorce,
575
00:33:09,220 --> 00:33:10,687
In fact, let's change it.
What about you?
576
00:33:12,023 --> 00:33:13,524
Um...
577
00:33:13,525 --> 00:33:15,126
What's your favorite
color? Purple?
578
00:33:15,127 --> 00:33:18,229
Mine's... Personally,
I like tangerine.
579
00:33:18,230 --> 00:33:19,562
Look, uh...
I feel like that's my color.
580
00:33:19,664 --> 00:33:21,431
Oh, yeah.
581
00:33:23,101 --> 00:33:24,267
Let's hear it for,
582
00:33:24,302 --> 00:33:25,935
Poke-a-Hot-Ass.
583
00:33:31,576 --> 00:33:33,042
Quiet.
Not cool.
584
00:33:34,045 --> 00:33:35,211
And now,
585
00:33:35,646 --> 00:33:37,981
Fuckasaurus Sex!
586
00:33:44,322 --> 00:33:45,855
Fuckasaurus Sex!
587
00:33:48,526 --> 00:33:52,462
I think we've got
ourselves a winner!
588
00:33:54,399 --> 00:33:55,865
So, sorry, honey.
589
00:33:57,770 --> 00:33:59,771
You're going to
the finals, man.
590
00:33:59,772 --> 00:34:01,806
How do you feel?
How do you feel?
591
00:34:01,807 --> 00:34:03,808
I feel fucking
awesome right now.
592
00:34:03,809 --> 00:34:05,109
Redge, did you get that?
593
00:34:05,110 --> 00:34:06,943
Got that shit like Spielberg.
594
00:34:14,285 --> 00:34:16,587
What the fuck even is this?
595
00:34:16,588 --> 00:34:18,755
What?
Nothing.
596
00:34:18,790 --> 00:34:20,023
Let me see?
597
00:34:20,291 --> 00:34:21,526
I wanna see.
598
00:34:21,527 --> 00:34:22,527
Get off my shit.
599
00:34:22,528 --> 00:34:24,529
I wanna know.
600
00:34:24,530 --> 00:34:25,696
I wanna know all
your secrets.
601
00:34:25,697 --> 00:34:27,165
Oh, God.
602
00:34:27,166 --> 00:34:28,498
Confess them to me.
603
00:34:29,167 --> 00:34:30,967
Confess them to you?
Yeah.
604
00:34:32,203 --> 00:34:33,703
We can cry together
605
00:34:33,838 --> 00:34:35,740
in a field.
606
00:34:35,741 --> 00:34:36,807
Okay.
Like...
607
00:34:36,808 --> 00:34:38,107
Okay.
608
00:34:39,477 --> 00:34:40,777
You want to know
what turns me on?
609
00:34:42,213 --> 00:34:43,346
Yeah.
610
00:34:43,414 --> 00:34:44,649
Oh, yeah.
611
00:34:44,650 --> 00:34:46,983
Doing bad things in public.
612
00:34:47,318 --> 00:34:50,253
Yeah?
Yeah.
613
00:34:52,390 --> 00:34:53,357
Take it out.
Okay.
614
00:34:53,358 --> 00:34:54,392
What?
615
00:34:54,393 --> 00:34:55,959
Take it out.
616
00:34:57,361 --> 00:34:58,429
I don't know.
617
00:34:58,430 --> 00:34:59,662
Mmm-hmm.
618
00:35:03,634 --> 00:35:06,404
But all these
people can see.
619
00:35:06,405 --> 00:35:08,538
I know. It's what
gets me so wet.
620
00:35:10,575 --> 00:35:11,875
I don't know.
621
00:35:12,710 --> 00:35:15,078
Come on, Ralphie,
show it to me.
622
00:35:17,615 --> 00:35:20,284
Can I get it
erect first?
623
00:35:20,285 --> 00:35:21,518
Do you wanna have
sex tonight or what?
624
00:35:27,725 --> 00:35:29,058
Oh!
625
00:35:29,861 --> 00:35:32,296
Hey! No, hey!
626
00:35:32,297 --> 00:35:33,897
Hey!
Whoa. Thanks.
627
00:35:38,369 --> 00:35:40,505
That's right! Man of the hour,
ladies and gentlemen.
628
00:35:40,506 --> 00:35:42,507
Stan!
629
00:35:42,508 --> 00:35:44,475
Stan, Stan, Stan.
What are you doing here?
630
00:35:44,476 --> 00:35:46,544
I thought you'd be balls
deep in Cathy by now.
631
00:35:46,545 --> 00:35:47,812
Yeah, that's not
gonna happen.
632
00:35:47,813 --> 00:35:50,448
No, it's not gonna
happen, is it, Stan?
633
00:35:50,449 --> 00:35:52,250
Although it is a shame that
you flew all the way to Texas
634
00:35:52,251 --> 00:35:53,851
to stalk a girl who doesn't
even wanna be stalked.
635
00:35:53,852 --> 00:35:55,553
I didn't come here
to stalk her.
636
00:35:55,554 --> 00:35:57,488
No? You came here to see me.
That's amazing, Stan.
637
00:35:57,489 --> 00:35:58,923
That's awesome. Hi!
638
00:35:58,924 --> 00:36:00,358
Hold this, please.
639
00:36:00,359 --> 00:36:02,393
Hello, ladies.
640
00:36:02,394 --> 00:36:04,662
How you doing?
641
00:36:04,663 --> 00:36:07,632
Hey, I just wanna say I thought
that you did absolutely incredible.
642
00:36:07,633 --> 00:36:09,400
Whatever, Dinocock.
Fuck off.
643
00:36:09,401 --> 00:36:10,967
Uh. I am not kidding.
I'm not kidding.
644
00:36:11,869 --> 00:36:13,938
I'm just on our
way out, so...
645
00:36:13,939 --> 00:36:18,910
Oh, well, if we would have
had your candy-ass cheerleaders
646
00:36:18,911 --> 00:36:20,511
on our side then
maybe we would have.
647
00:36:20,512 --> 00:36:21,879
Okay, can I speak with
you for a second?
648
00:36:21,880 --> 00:36:23,481
No, no.
649
00:36:23,482 --> 00:36:25,383
Um, yeah.
No, no.
650
00:36:25,384 --> 00:36:26,717
Okay.
Seriously?
651
00:36:26,718 --> 00:36:28,252
Hey, nice to meet you.
652
00:36:28,253 --> 00:36:29,520
Nice to meet you.
653
00:36:29,521 --> 00:36:31,087
Yeah, you, too.
Yeah. Okay.
654
00:36:33,558 --> 00:36:34,724
How do you do it?
655
00:36:35,893 --> 00:36:37,627
What?
How do you do the splits?
656
00:36:38,629 --> 00:36:40,698
Oh! Um...
657
00:36:40,699 --> 00:36:42,200
Drill team.
Drill team?
658
00:36:42,201 --> 00:36:43,801
Yeah.
Okay.
659
00:36:43,802 --> 00:36:45,835
Can you, um...
Can you teach me?
660
00:36:45,970 --> 00:36:47,270
What?
661
00:36:48,272 --> 00:36:49,939
Those teabags are
looking at us.
662
00:36:56,714 --> 00:36:58,047
Oh!
663
00:36:58,549 --> 00:36:59,684
It's on, bro.
664
00:36:59,685 --> 00:37:00,883
Oh, hell yeah,
it's on, bro.
665
00:37:02,987 --> 00:37:03,955
Is there something
on my face?
666
00:37:03,956 --> 00:37:05,456
No.
667
00:37:05,457 --> 00:37:07,190
It's just beautiful.
668
00:37:08,759 --> 00:37:10,059
Oh!
669
00:37:12,296 --> 00:37:14,398
We don't need you all to
be doing no pornos in here.
670
00:37:14,399 --> 00:37:16,267
We are so sorry.
671
00:37:16,268 --> 00:37:18,436
He might have had a few too
many drinks this evening.
672
00:37:18,437 --> 00:37:20,738
This is a family place.
673
00:37:20,739 --> 00:37:22,305
We completely understand.
674
00:37:26,344 --> 00:37:27,812
Nicely done, guys.
675
00:37:27,813 --> 00:37:30,448
Oh, God. What? Are you serious? Perfect.
676
00:37:30,449 --> 00:37:31,749
Deal's a deal.
677
00:37:31,750 --> 00:37:33,718
Of course, I'm serious.
You know, I'm...
678
00:37:33,719 --> 00:37:35,386
Come on, Timmy, you're
not the boss of me.
679
00:37:35,387 --> 00:37:36,787
Leave the girl alone.
680
00:37:36,788 --> 00:37:38,289
All right, all right.
Let's go home.
681
00:37:38,290 --> 00:37:39,756
All right. Whatever.
All right?
682
00:37:39,790 --> 00:37:41,859
Yes.
683
00:37:41,860 --> 00:37:43,561
No, no.
No, she said yes. Dude!
684
00:37:43,562 --> 00:37:45,563
All right, out the door.
685
00:37:45,564 --> 00:37:47,531
Ladies, we'll be outside.
This is...
686
00:37:47,532 --> 00:37:49,132
Just let me go.
I know.
687
00:37:50,935 --> 00:37:54,839
Are you... That little weirdo's
dick is fucking enormous.
688
00:37:54,840 --> 00:37:56,641
I don't care if it's
six feet long.
689
00:37:56,642 --> 00:37:58,009
You're just gonna
leave me here?
690
00:37:58,010 --> 00:38:01,312
I'm leaving you with
the "Midnight Cowboy".
691
00:38:01,313 --> 00:38:04,347
And I am taking
one for the team.
692
00:38:04,982 --> 00:38:07,083
This isn't college anymore.
693
00:38:07,518 --> 00:38:09,152
Pretend.
694
00:38:09,687 --> 00:38:12,088
You are getting horny.
695
00:38:12,523 --> 00:38:14,857
Very horny.
696
00:38:15,426 --> 00:38:16,927
Have fun.
697
00:38:16,928 --> 00:38:18,361
I will if you will.
698
00:38:19,997 --> 00:38:21,998
Cool, bro.
All right, let him go.
699
00:38:23,434 --> 00:38:24,635
Ah!
700
00:38:24,636 --> 00:38:25,936
Hey.
701
00:38:25,937 --> 00:38:29,307
Oh, God. Oh, my...
702
00:38:29,308 --> 00:38:30,741
Bye, Katie.
I did this for you.
703
00:38:30,742 --> 00:38:32,141
It's Cathy.
704
00:38:34,945 --> 00:38:36,179
Where are they?
705
00:38:37,615 --> 00:38:39,483
I don't see 'em and they
were following us, right?
706
00:38:39,484 --> 00:38:40,618
Jeff, they were
following us, yeah?
707
00:38:40,619 --> 00:38:41,818
They will be here.
708
00:38:45,489 --> 00:38:47,325
Stan?
Hmm?
709
00:38:47,326 --> 00:38:48,492
What are you doing?
710
00:38:48,493 --> 00:38:50,059
Nothing.
711
00:38:51,596 --> 00:38:53,896
My name is Stan. I made a
mistake and I want you back.
712
00:38:55,766 --> 00:38:57,768
That was an excellent
impersonation of me.
713
00:38:57,769 --> 00:39:00,069
That was... It was like
looking in a mirror.
714
00:39:00,104 --> 00:39:01,839
Here they come.
715
00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:03,741
Here they come.
Yes.
716
00:39:03,742 --> 00:39:05,041
It's all right. Bring it
on, ladies. Bring it in.
717
00:39:05,543 --> 00:39:07,778
Come on, right here.
718
00:39:07,779 --> 00:39:09,347
Maybe I wasn't even thinking
about her just now, dude.
719
00:39:09,348 --> 00:39:11,349
Maybe I was thinking
about another girl.
720
00:39:11,350 --> 00:39:13,449
Like, maybe a girl
I met tonight.
721
00:39:14,552 --> 00:39:15,918
I don't know, maybe she
gave me her number.
722
00:39:17,054 --> 00:39:18,187
Why are you just telling
me this just now?
723
00:39:18,989 --> 00:39:20,758
Well, suddenly
you're interested.
724
00:39:20,759 --> 00:39:22,059
Did you tell her that she
had shit on her face?
725
00:39:22,060 --> 00:39:23,894
No, she did
that to me.
726
00:39:23,895 --> 00:39:26,097
Are you kidding me?
Are you kidding me?
727
00:39:26,098 --> 00:39:27,698
What are you doing here with
your dick in your pants?
728
00:39:27,699 --> 00:39:28,899
You should have your dick
in her mouth, buddy.
729
00:39:28,900 --> 00:39:30,067
Come on, this is good.
730
00:39:30,068 --> 00:39:31,502
This is good.
731
00:39:31,503 --> 00:39:32,503
I love this.
732
00:39:32,504 --> 00:39:34,138
Very good.
733
00:39:34,139 --> 00:39:37,508
I will take you...
Oh, yes. I will take you.
734
00:39:37,509 --> 00:39:39,443
You wanna do that?
Okay, let's do...
735
00:39:39,444 --> 00:39:40,578
Mule train?
No, I'm all right.
736
00:39:40,579 --> 00:39:42,178
Okay, okay. Well...
No thanks.
737
00:39:46,984 --> 00:39:49,819
Okay.
738
00:39:49,820 --> 00:39:52,022
So, Stan,
739
00:39:52,023 --> 00:39:55,092
there are four guys and three girls and
you have a phone number in your pocket.
740
00:39:55,093 --> 00:39:57,128
I think you need to
make a phone call.
741
00:39:57,129 --> 00:39:58,995
Now... You got a short window,
buddy, you need to lay some track.
742
00:39:59,630 --> 00:40:00,830
I don't...
743
00:40:01,832 --> 00:40:03,466
Hello.
Ooh!
744
00:40:09,140 --> 00:40:12,042
I don't... I think I'm just
gonna text, dude, right?
745
00:40:12,043 --> 00:40:14,277
Probably texting is better
at this stage 'cause,
746
00:40:15,012 --> 00:40:16,245
you know...
747
00:40:17,715 --> 00:40:19,115
Oh, I wish I had her email.
748
00:42:25,110 --> 00:42:27,144
Ooh, I'm sorry. That's
been broken for a while.
749
00:42:27,145 --> 00:42:29,013
Oh, yeah.
750
00:42:29,014 --> 00:42:30,680
There's a 7-Eleven I could walk
you to to finish your business.
751
00:42:32,082 --> 00:42:33,382
Come here.
752
00:42:34,852 --> 00:42:36,720
I think that something
is moving in there.
753
00:42:36,721 --> 00:42:38,554
You should see the
bathroom, totally gross.
754
00:42:39,189 --> 00:42:40,389
What's she doing?
755
00:42:40,791 --> 00:42:42,092
Ground. So that's it.
756
00:42:42,093 --> 00:42:43,392
Whoa!
757
00:42:46,030 --> 00:42:47,631
Whoa!
758
00:42:47,632 --> 00:42:48,332
Dude, you can do it.
759
00:42:48,333 --> 00:42:50,099
Absolutely.
760
00:42:52,604 --> 00:42:53,637
All right.
Just need to breathe.
761
00:42:53,638 --> 00:42:55,005
It does not look that hard.
762
00:42:55,006 --> 00:42:56,707
Breathing, that's not
gonna be an issue
763
00:42:56,708 --> 00:42:57,908
I've been breathing
since I was born.
764
00:42:57,909 --> 00:42:59,843
Look. Already half way.
765
00:42:59,844 --> 00:43:01,377
Half way to finals.
766
00:43:01,880 --> 00:43:03,512
No!
767
00:43:04,949 --> 00:43:06,650
That's final, right there.
768
00:43:06,651 --> 00:43:08,417
That was incredible.
769
00:43:10,087 --> 00:43:11,155
What?
770
00:43:11,156 --> 00:43:12,488
What is that?
771
00:43:14,326 --> 00:43:16,126
My God, that's
a hairy python.
772
00:43:16,127 --> 00:43:18,227
No, that's not a python.
That's a dick.
773
00:43:28,672 --> 00:43:31,040
Oh, thank God.
774
00:43:50,194 --> 00:43:51,360
So, this is you.
775
00:43:52,262 --> 00:43:54,063
Yeah, this is...
This is me.
776
00:43:55,366 --> 00:43:56,599
Good night.
777
00:43:57,868 --> 00:43:59,602
Yes.
Yes.
778
00:44:00,337 --> 00:44:02,204
Good night.
Yes.
779
00:44:02,940 --> 00:44:04,273
Okay.
780
00:44:07,111 --> 00:44:08,310
All right.
781
00:44:11,281 --> 00:44:13,951
Okay, we're gonna do
that one more time. Yes.
782
00:44:13,952 --> 00:44:15,953
Let me go ahead
and give you my card.
783
00:44:15,954 --> 00:44:18,154
Cool. Give me a phone call, anytime.
784
00:44:20,758 --> 00:44:22,259
You're a veterinarian?
785
00:44:22,260 --> 00:44:25,763
I am a doctor
of small animals.
786
00:44:25,764 --> 00:44:26,962
Don't I look like one?
787
00:44:27,398 --> 00:44:29,233
Oh, you absolutely do.
788
00:44:29,234 --> 00:44:31,068
Yeah. Like, even
from that angle?
789
00:44:31,069 --> 00:44:33,069
Oh, especially
from that angle.
790
00:44:34,105 --> 00:44:36,407
I'm a... I'm
in med school.
791
00:44:36,408 --> 00:44:38,976
No kidding. That's funny. Yeah.
792
00:44:38,977 --> 00:44:40,310
What made you become
a vet? That's funny.
793
00:44:40,311 --> 00:44:43,047
I worked with dogs
in the Marines.
794
00:44:43,048 --> 00:44:45,282
Yeah. Bomb sniffing
dogs, just kinda...
795
00:44:45,283 --> 00:44:46,450
Just like fell
into it.
796
00:44:46,451 --> 00:44:49,820
You were in
the Marines?
797
00:44:49,821 --> 00:44:51,922
Yeah, yeah. But the dogs started
making better conversations
798
00:44:51,923 --> 00:44:54,091
than some of those
jarheads I was working with.
799
00:44:54,092 --> 00:44:55,993
Right. So I had to get out
of there as fast as I could.
800
00:44:55,994 --> 00:44:58,461
So, that makes
you like a...
801
00:44:59,196 --> 00:45:01,130
A vet vet.
802
00:45:01,999 --> 00:45:03,265
Yes.
803
00:45:03,734 --> 00:45:04,867
Yes, it does.
804
00:45:06,170 --> 00:45:07,705
Wow.
805
00:45:07,706 --> 00:45:08,904
I had fun tonight.
806
00:45:09,473 --> 00:45:10,706
Yeah, I did, too.
807
00:45:14,878 --> 00:45:16,078
Well, let's
do it again.
808
00:45:16,880 --> 00:45:18,747
Thank you for the dance.
809
00:45:19,049 --> 00:45:20,316
Thank you
810
00:45:20,884 --> 00:45:23,821
for the dance.
811
00:45:23,822 --> 00:45:24,855
Oh, come on,
I don't hear anything.
812
00:45:24,856 --> 00:45:26,857
Hey, guys.
How's it going?
813
00:45:26,858 --> 00:45:28,125
You guys hear anything in there,
I don't think they're fucking.
814
00:45:28,126 --> 00:45:29,293
Oh, hey, dude.
815
00:45:29,294 --> 00:45:31,295
Hey, they're not fucking.
816
00:45:31,296 --> 00:45:33,964
I didn't give up my room
for you guys not to fuck.
817
00:45:33,965 --> 00:45:35,364
Let's go.
It's just really gross here.
818
00:45:35,733 --> 00:45:37,935
It's like so gross.
819
00:45:37,936 --> 00:45:39,203
I can't get the keys because she's
got them in there with that creep.
820
00:45:39,204 --> 00:45:40,738
Hey, I got brews here
if you wanna...
821
00:45:40,739 --> 00:45:42,771
No, I'm all right.
No, no, you have them.
822
00:45:48,747 --> 00:45:49,945
What is it?
823
00:45:55,419 --> 00:45:56,652
Is it real?
824
00:45:57,321 --> 00:45:59,156
Is it from the internet?
825
00:45:59,157 --> 00:46:01,058
I mean, have you seen
a penis this big before?
826
00:46:01,059 --> 00:46:02,558
Could you put
that away, please?
827
00:46:04,027 --> 00:46:05,594
Whoa!
828
00:46:07,098 --> 00:46:09,431
If you don't get out of the
bedroom right now, we're leaving!
829
00:46:10,367 --> 00:46:12,870
Hey, um...
830
00:46:12,871 --> 00:46:15,038
Can I take you to breakfast
in the morning? What?
831
00:46:15,039 --> 00:46:16,473
No, I wanna take you to my Saturday
place. Please, please, please.
832
00:46:16,474 --> 00:46:21,311
I love talking to you so much so I just
want to keep this conversation going on.
833
00:46:21,312 --> 00:46:22,946
Uh.
Please?
834
00:46:22,947 --> 00:46:23,981
I'll think about it.
Okay.
835
00:46:23,982 --> 00:46:26,517
Do you like migas?
836
00:46:26,518 --> 00:46:27,484
Hey, beautiful, don't
knock so hard. Fuck off.
837
00:46:27,485 --> 00:46:29,052
It was... So sorry.
838
00:46:29,053 --> 00:46:30,854
Yeah. Oh, yeah,
I bet you're sorry.
839
00:46:30,855 --> 00:46:33,023
I wanna get the fuck
out of here.
840
00:46:33,024 --> 00:46:34,424
Hey, honey, I think I
see something on your face
841
00:46:34,425 --> 00:46:35,824
Don't touch me!
842
00:46:37,361 --> 00:46:38,761
What the fuck
just happened?
843
00:46:40,564 --> 00:46:42,232
I thought I got her wet...
844
00:46:42,233 --> 00:46:44,134
I think she loved you.
I was clear on that.
845
00:46:44,135 --> 00:46:45,334
Yeah, that was well played.
846
00:46:50,007 --> 00:46:52,209
Yeah?
847
00:46:52,210 --> 00:46:54,545
Captain fucker, you were only
in there for seven minutes.
848
00:46:54,546 --> 00:46:56,512
You're a badass.
849
00:47:30,914 --> 00:47:32,514
Fuck!
850
00:47:35,552 --> 00:47:36,952
Where are you going?
851
00:47:38,288 --> 00:47:39,857
El Azteca.
852
00:47:39,858 --> 00:47:41,557
El Azteca?
853
00:47:42,192 --> 00:47:43,525
You wanna wait
for me, man?
854
00:47:48,265 --> 00:47:50,334
Mmm.
This is so good.
855
00:47:50,335 --> 00:47:52,434
You cannot find migas
like this in New York.
856
00:47:52,436 --> 00:47:53,702
Ugh!
857
00:47:54,571 --> 00:47:55,838
Why did you let
me drink so much?
858
00:47:58,976 --> 00:48:00,976
So, what happened
with Ralphie?
859
00:48:01,645 --> 00:48:02,945
We tried.
860
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:04,546
I threw up.
861
00:48:04,915 --> 00:48:06,348
All over his face.
862
00:48:07,618 --> 00:48:09,086
Oh, God, Kara.
863
00:48:09,087 --> 00:48:10,753
And he actually wanted
to keep going.
864
00:48:11,221 --> 00:48:12,488
Can you believe that?
865
00:48:13,390 --> 00:48:16,493
Puke all over his
face and he's like,
866
00:48:16,494 --> 00:48:17,693
"I don't mind. "
867
00:48:19,897 --> 00:48:21,764
You always get
the normal ones.
868
00:48:34,678 --> 00:48:35,911
Okay.
869
00:48:36,380 --> 00:48:38,248
You ready?
870
00:48:38,249 --> 00:48:39,882
For breakfast? Yeah, I'm ready. Yeah.
871
00:48:42,019 --> 00:48:43,686
Okay, yeah. Out.
872
00:48:45,055 --> 00:48:46,089
My door doesn't open. Out.
Okay.
873
00:48:46,090 --> 00:48:47,423
Okay.
874
00:48:49,026 --> 00:48:51,760
Speaking of which,
did you guys do it?
875
00:48:52,229 --> 00:48:53,563
No.
876
00:48:53,564 --> 00:48:55,497
Why not?
Because I'm not...
877
00:48:56,433 --> 00:48:57,666
Like me?
878
00:48:59,069 --> 00:49:00,202
I didn't say that.
879
00:49:02,339 --> 00:49:05,040
Yeah, it's okay. If it wasn't for
sluts no one would get laid, right?
880
00:49:07,945 --> 00:49:09,378
Oh, no.
881
00:49:11,648 --> 00:49:12,881
Oh, no.
882
00:49:14,485 --> 00:49:18,956
I want you to be the better person in
this situation. Don't touch my face.
883
00:49:18,957 --> 00:49:20,157
No. What...
What situation?
884
00:49:20,158 --> 00:49:21,390
He's here.
885
00:49:22,392 --> 00:49:23,525
He just came
through the door.
886
00:49:24,261 --> 00:49:25,694
Oh, shit.
887
00:49:26,430 --> 00:49:27,796
Oh, shit.
Be strong.
888
00:49:28,165 --> 00:49:29,331
Is he alone?
889
00:49:30,000 --> 00:49:31,568
Um...
890
00:49:31,569 --> 00:49:33,737
I'm gonna go say hi to a
friend over there. Okay.
891
00:49:33,738 --> 00:49:38,108
And I will be right back.
892
00:49:38,109 --> 00:49:40,510
If I turn around and he is with
some whore... Just be strong, Kara.
893
00:49:40,511 --> 00:49:43,280
I swear I'll burn this fucking place
Okay, breathe.
894
00:49:43,281 --> 00:49:44,480
Breathe.
895
00:49:45,315 --> 00:49:46,483
He's coming over.
896
00:49:46,484 --> 00:49:48,151
Hey!
Take the knives.
897
00:49:48,152 --> 00:49:49,486
Put them in your purse.
898
00:49:49,487 --> 00:49:51,021
Oh, my God!
899
00:49:51,022 --> 00:49:53,123
Hey!
Whoa!
900
00:49:53,124 --> 00:49:55,124
Jeff!
Crazy!
901
00:49:55,726 --> 00:49:57,092
So good to see you.
902
00:49:59,262 --> 00:50:00,462
Hello, Kara.
903
00:50:01,264 --> 00:50:03,500
Oh, well.
904
00:50:03,501 --> 00:50:05,535
Hey there.
What a surprise.
905
00:50:05,536 --> 00:50:07,070
Yeah!
906
00:50:07,071 --> 00:50:08,203
How are you?
So good.
907
00:50:08,338 --> 00:50:09,673
I'm so good.
908
00:50:09,674 --> 00:50:11,006
Yeah, how you doing?
909
00:50:11,742 --> 00:50:13,610
I'm never been better.
910
00:50:13,611 --> 00:50:15,145
Yeah.
911
00:50:15,146 --> 00:50:17,280
'Cause you look so good.
912
00:50:17,281 --> 00:50:19,583
Thank you. So do you.
913
00:50:19,584 --> 00:50:20,849
Thank you.
914
00:50:22,119 --> 00:50:23,687
Especially in that
video last night.
915
00:50:23,688 --> 00:50:26,056
Oh!
Yeah, very impressive.
916
00:50:26,057 --> 00:50:27,856
Yes. Well, I'm going
to the finals.
917
00:50:28,058 --> 00:50:29,393
Oh!
Wow!
918
00:50:29,394 --> 00:50:31,294
I know.
Congratulations.
919
00:50:31,295 --> 00:50:33,063
And I see you've
taken up photography.
920
00:50:33,064 --> 00:50:34,231
That's great.
921
00:50:34,232 --> 00:50:35,864
Mmm-hmm. Yeah, sure have.
922
00:50:37,067 --> 00:50:39,236
What did you think?
923
00:50:39,237 --> 00:50:41,538
I loved it. Great composition, just
really good lighting all around.
924
00:50:41,539 --> 00:50:43,573
It was really nice work.
925
00:50:43,574 --> 00:50:45,709
Although I notice he's not
here to buy you breakfast.
926
00:50:45,710 --> 00:50:47,075
That's not too classy.
927
00:50:47,744 --> 00:50:49,513
No, no.
928
00:50:49,514 --> 00:50:51,615
But I think it's really classy
that you've bought breakfast
929
00:50:51,616 --> 00:50:53,517
for the little she-whore that
you slept with last night.
930
00:50:53,518 --> 00:50:54,783
Yeah.
931
00:50:56,053 --> 00:50:57,821
She's the best.
932
00:50:57,822 --> 00:50:59,621
Yeah. You know,
she looks really familiar.
933
00:51:02,492 --> 00:51:03,959
She really looks like
someone that I know.
934
00:51:04,494 --> 00:51:05,529
Yes.
935
00:51:05,530 --> 00:51:06,797
Oh!
936
00:51:06,798 --> 00:51:08,697
I know who. Me!
937
00:51:11,803 --> 00:51:13,035
Oh, okay.
938
00:51:13,804 --> 00:51:15,205
You're right.
939
00:51:15,206 --> 00:51:16,505
I mean, it's...
940
00:51:17,474 --> 00:51:20,776
It's really kinda true.
I'm sorry.
941
00:51:22,112 --> 00:51:23,645
Kinda pathetic, Jeff.
942
00:51:24,281 --> 00:51:26,183
Kind of Vertigo.
943
00:51:26,184 --> 00:51:27,783
You gonna dress her
up in my clothes, too?
944
00:51:28,251 --> 00:51:29,384
No, I would never do that.
945
00:51:30,353 --> 00:51:31,587
I don't even
like your clothes.
946
00:51:32,122 --> 00:51:33,790
So...
947
00:51:33,791 --> 00:51:35,190
Well, we know my guy
didn't look like you.
948
00:51:36,460 --> 00:51:38,627
At least not downstairs.
949
00:51:40,564 --> 00:51:41,697
You guys have
a good breakfast.
950
00:51:44,101 --> 00:51:45,267
That was so good.
951
00:51:45,769 --> 00:51:47,569
I'm so proud of you.
952
00:51:48,638 --> 00:51:50,172
Oh, fuck.
What?
953
00:51:51,141 --> 00:51:52,375
Ow!
954
00:51:52,376 --> 00:51:53,777
God, she even
looks like me.
955
00:51:53,778 --> 00:51:55,110
No, she really doesn't.
956
00:51:55,812 --> 00:51:57,447
Oh, I see.
957
00:51:57,448 --> 00:52:00,549
Hey, don't go in there. Hey,
really don't go inside, please.
958
00:52:04,121 --> 00:52:06,490
I will kill you!
959
00:52:06,491 --> 00:52:07,891
Do you understand?
Oh, my God.
960
00:52:07,892 --> 00:52:09,224
I will fuck you up.
961
00:52:14,531 --> 00:52:16,433
He's gone. He's gone.
962
00:52:16,434 --> 00:52:17,866
He's gone.
He's gone.
963
00:52:19,269 --> 00:52:21,138
Oh, you got a...
964
00:52:21,139 --> 00:52:22,337
You got a chip.
965
00:52:41,358 --> 00:52:42,557
Take your phone out.
966
00:52:42,759 --> 00:52:44,561
What?
967
00:52:44,562 --> 00:52:45,727
Take your phone out.
Take your phone out. Why?
968
00:52:49,633 --> 00:52:50,933
Okay.
969
00:52:53,504 --> 00:52:54,937
Pull up Cathy's number.
970
00:53:00,544 --> 00:53:01,743
Got it?
971
00:53:02,946 --> 00:53:04,279
Yeah.
972
00:53:06,283 --> 00:53:07,415
Delete on three.
973
00:53:08,251 --> 00:53:09,451
One.
974
00:53:09,819 --> 00:53:11,153
Two.
975
00:53:11,655 --> 00:53:12,955
Three.
976
00:53:30,774 --> 00:53:31,940
You know what, that...
977
00:53:32,809 --> 00:53:34,643
I think that actually
feels good.
978
00:53:43,853 --> 00:53:45,120
You okay?
979
00:53:52,229 --> 00:53:54,229
She drinks my cum, man.
980
00:53:57,467 --> 00:53:58,800
She actually likes it.
981
00:54:05,775 --> 00:54:08,710
Where am I gonna find somebody
who's that cool ever again?
982
00:54:11,848 --> 00:54:13,115
It's...
983
00:54:15,952 --> 00:54:17,352
No. Yeah, that's
really cool of her.
984
00:54:20,258 --> 00:54:21,758
Yep. Okay. We're moving on.
985
00:54:21,759 --> 00:54:24,226
We're moving on up,
like the mother-fucking
986
00:54:24,494 --> 00:54:25,794
Jeffersons.
987
00:54:28,465 --> 00:54:29,799
Okay, men.
988
00:54:29,800 --> 00:54:30,900
Yeah, let's
get fucked up.
989
00:54:30,901 --> 00:54:33,403
We are not leaving
this apartment
990
00:54:33,404 --> 00:54:36,506
till we come up with an air
sex routine that is so depraved
991
00:54:36,507 --> 00:54:39,342
and so sick that we will be ashamed
to look our own mothers in the eye
992
00:54:39,343 --> 00:54:42,279
for another year.
993
00:54:42,280 --> 00:54:44,547
Maybe this is a coincidence,
but I was just sitting here thinking,
994
00:54:44,548 --> 00:54:46,114
"What am I gonna do
for dinner tonight?"
995
00:54:48,485 --> 00:54:50,687
That sounds like
fate to me.
996
00:54:50,688 --> 00:54:54,057
Well, I was probably just gonna
microwave this gas station burrito.
997
00:54:54,058 --> 00:54:56,693
Setting the timer now, but I'm
thinking between the two of us,
998
00:54:56,694 --> 00:54:58,061
we could come up with something
better than that, right?
999
00:54:58,062 --> 00:55:00,463
Right. I'll come by around eight, okay?
1000
00:55:00,464 --> 00:55:01,863
Okay, bye.
1001
00:55:02,999 --> 00:55:04,534
Oh, my God.
1002
00:55:04,535 --> 00:55:06,336
Oh, that voice.
1003
00:55:06,337 --> 00:55:07,704
I may have to wring
out my panties.
1004
00:55:07,705 --> 00:55:09,906
Kara, what am I doing?
1005
00:55:09,907 --> 00:55:12,042
What do you mean?
You're moving on up,
1006
00:55:12,043 --> 00:55:13,877
like the mother-fucking
Jeffersons.
1007
00:55:13,878 --> 00:55:17,547
Okay, guys, you know what
we're gonna do tonight?
1008
00:55:17,548 --> 00:55:19,482
What we're gonna do is
we're gonna break free.
1009
00:55:19,483 --> 00:55:22,018
We're gonna break free
from their petty needling.
1010
00:55:22,019 --> 00:55:24,854
We're gonna break free from their
impossibly high expectations,
1011
00:55:24,855 --> 00:55:26,790
and their fucking harassment
1012
00:55:26,791 --> 00:55:28,591
about what lamp is gonna
look better in that corner.
1013
00:55:28,592 --> 00:55:30,393
Fuck that corner.
1014
00:55:30,394 --> 00:55:32,662
Fuck that corner. Guys, I
really need you on my team
1015
00:55:32,663 --> 00:55:34,097
and I feel great about tonight.
Can we do this together?
1016
00:55:34,098 --> 00:55:35,297
Yeah.
Yeah.
1017
00:55:38,335 --> 00:55:39,501
Stan, am I bothering you?
Nope.
1018
00:55:41,371 --> 00:55:42,839
Who are you texting?
Nobody.
1019
00:55:42,840 --> 00:55:44,040
Hey!
Is it someone with a vagina?
1020
00:55:44,041 --> 00:55:45,207
Nope. Let's do this.
1021
00:55:45,575 --> 00:55:47,811
Let's fuck the air.
1022
00:55:47,812 --> 00:55:49,846
Yeah, you must fuck the air.
1023
00:55:49,847 --> 00:55:53,215
You must fuck the air!
1024
00:55:54,484 --> 00:55:56,686
You are a miracle worker.
1025
00:55:56,687 --> 00:55:58,453
Mmm-hmm.
I've got boobs.
1026
00:56:00,690 --> 00:56:02,692
Normally, it's just like two
1027
00:56:02,693 --> 00:56:04,392
sensitive freckles.
1028
00:56:05,495 --> 00:56:06,429
Ooh! I'll get it.
1029
00:56:06,430 --> 00:56:07,929
Help! Help!
Oh, what?
1030
00:56:08,365 --> 00:56:10,533
Now, listen, okay.
1031
00:56:10,534 --> 00:56:12,035
Be careful.
Careful?
1032
00:56:12,036 --> 00:56:14,404
Yeah, if his dick is as
big as his brother's,
1033
00:56:14,405 --> 00:56:15,839
you will be coming home
in a hospital gurney.
1034
00:56:15,840 --> 00:56:17,474
Oh, that sounds fun.
1035
00:56:17,475 --> 00:56:20,577
Okay, I put condoms in your bag. Kara!
1036
00:56:20,578 --> 00:56:22,545
What? Don't be
afraid to say yes.
1037
00:56:22,546 --> 00:56:24,481
No, no. I'm going
home tomorrow.
1038
00:56:24,482 --> 00:56:26,416
I can't leave you
alone tonight.
1039
00:56:26,417 --> 00:56:27,582
Who says I'm gonna be alone?
1040
00:56:28,017 --> 00:56:30,053
Not Ralphie?
1041
00:56:30,054 --> 00:56:32,055
No, barf-boy,
are you fucking kidding me?
1042
00:56:32,056 --> 00:56:34,758
Hello. Welcome.
Hello. Thank you.
1043
00:56:34,759 --> 00:56:37,727
Come in. Come in. O-M-G.
1044
00:56:37,728 --> 00:56:40,864
Hi. How you doing? He brought
flowers. Are you from this century?
1045
00:56:40,865 --> 00:56:43,231
You totally didn't
need to do this.
1046
00:56:44,101 --> 00:56:47,871
See, I did bring flowers, but
they're not for you, they're for you.
1047
00:56:47,872 --> 00:56:49,439
I'm sorry. I would have got
you flowers, but I didn't.
1048
00:56:49,440 --> 00:56:50,638
Oh, um...
1049
00:56:53,943 --> 00:56:55,779
It's not funny.
No, it is.
1050
00:56:55,780 --> 00:56:58,148
Yeah. He had a moment
the other night,
1051
00:56:58,149 --> 00:56:59,548
but he's a real sweet guy.
What?
1052
00:56:59,682 --> 00:57:00,984
Right.
1053
00:57:00,985 --> 00:57:02,051
Okay!
Bye.
1054
00:57:02,052 --> 00:57:03,620
Bye-bye.
1055
00:57:03,621 --> 00:57:04,521
All right. All right.
You ready to go?
1056
00:57:04,522 --> 00:57:05,755
Bye, Kara.
1057
00:57:05,756 --> 00:57:07,255
Be safe.
1058
00:57:08,892 --> 00:57:10,192
Yes. Yes.
We will. We will.
1059
00:57:10,794 --> 00:57:11,960
Good night.
Goodbye.
1060
00:57:14,130 --> 00:57:15,463
Ugh!
1061
00:57:19,169 --> 00:57:20,570
So, the Marines...
1062
00:57:20,571 --> 00:57:22,105
That's...
1063
00:57:22,106 --> 00:57:23,305
Yeah.
Yeah.
1064
00:57:27,143 --> 00:57:28,844
So, um...
1065
00:57:29,512 --> 00:57:30,947
Did you ever...
1066
00:57:30,948 --> 00:57:33,216
Go to war, shoot
someone, get stabbed?
1067
00:57:33,217 --> 00:57:35,218
Oh, does everybody
ask you that?
1068
00:57:35,219 --> 00:57:36,453
All the time. Yeah.
1069
00:57:36,454 --> 00:57:37,886
So sorry.
1070
00:57:38,455 --> 00:57:39,654
You should be.
1071
00:57:43,560 --> 00:57:44,761
So, did you?
1072
00:57:44,762 --> 00:57:46,061
You didn't notice
my wooden leg?
1073
00:57:49,165 --> 00:57:51,299
No, I took some shrapnel
1074
00:57:52,469 --> 00:57:54,637
to the shoulder.
1075
00:57:54,638 --> 00:57:57,606
Wall exploded and piece
of pipe lodged in there.
1076
00:57:57,974 --> 00:57:59,042
Had to cut it out.
1077
00:57:59,043 --> 00:58:00,643
Oh, my God!
1078
00:58:00,644 --> 00:58:01,877
Yeah.
1079
00:58:02,645 --> 00:58:04,179
It sounds worse
than it was but...
1080
00:58:10,253 --> 00:58:11,419
Can I see it?
1081
00:58:14,958 --> 00:58:16,125
Like, now?
1082
00:58:16,126 --> 00:58:17,760
Yeah.
1083
00:58:17,761 --> 00:58:19,461
Seriously?
Absolutely.
1084
00:58:20,063 --> 00:58:21,296
I... We were, um...
1085
00:58:21,731 --> 00:58:22,964
We're studying
1086
00:58:23,766 --> 00:58:26,069
wound care in
class right now
1087
00:58:26,070 --> 00:58:29,104
and it would be highly,
highly educational.
1088
00:58:31,140 --> 00:58:32,208
I think they're
gonna let us in.
1089
00:58:32,209 --> 00:58:34,611
Okay, people.
1090
00:58:34,612 --> 00:58:38,046
The air sex finals
are beyond sold out.
1091
00:58:42,151 --> 00:58:44,087
So,
1092
00:58:44,088 --> 00:58:46,923
we're gonna seat the finalists
and their guests first.
1093
00:58:46,924 --> 00:58:48,957
So, when I call your name
you can go on in.
1094
00:58:49,826 --> 00:58:52,394
Uh, Hugh G. Rection.
1095
00:58:58,902 --> 00:59:00,669
Pussy Juice Cocktail.
1096
00:59:05,074 --> 00:59:07,243
I'm a little worried
'cause they've got vaginas,
1097
00:59:07,244 --> 00:59:08,077
and that always gives you
the upper hand.
1098
00:59:08,078 --> 00:59:09,678
Nazi Assfucker.
1099
00:59:12,615 --> 00:59:15,785
You know that girl
I met here, uh,
1100
00:59:15,786 --> 00:59:18,021
she's playing a show nearby.
She's been texting me.
1101
00:59:18,022 --> 00:59:19,055
Fuckasaurus Rex!
So?
1102
00:59:19,056 --> 00:59:20,655
Fuckasaurus Sex!
1103
00:59:21,090 --> 00:59:22,624
Okay, whatever. Go.
1104
00:59:23,760 --> 00:59:26,161
Insane Clown Pussy.
1105
00:59:28,098 --> 00:59:29,264
So, you're gonna
bail on me again.
1106
00:59:30,333 --> 00:59:32,068
Look, I'm not bailing
on you... Yeah, you are.
1107
00:59:32,069 --> 00:59:34,003
Donni Darkhole.
1108
00:59:34,004 --> 00:59:35,738
I'm going to hang
out with a girl.
1109
00:59:35,739 --> 00:59:38,074
Isn't that what you
want me to do
1110
00:59:38,075 --> 00:59:40,577
this weekend, right?
Isn't that the whole...
1111
00:59:40,578 --> 00:59:42,111
Yeah. You really need me here for this?
1112
00:59:42,112 --> 00:59:45,014
You're right.
Go, go. Yeah.
1113
00:59:45,015 --> 00:59:47,917
Fuck her in the butt. Okay, so you're
going to hold this against me, really?
1114
00:59:47,918 --> 00:59:48,918
Why is it so
important to you?
1115
00:59:48,919 --> 00:59:52,889
Yeah, because everything in my life
is going so incredibly right now, dude.
1116
00:59:52,890 --> 00:59:54,624
I'm fucking sleeping
on a couch
1117
00:59:54,625 --> 00:59:56,359
and driving around
in a corpse.
1118
00:59:56,360 --> 00:59:59,662
I'm sorry I'm not in Beverly
Hills making my dreams come true.
1119
00:59:59,663 --> 01:00:02,865
Making my... Right. I'm fucking
working at a pizza parlor in Pasadena.
1120
01:00:02,866 --> 01:00:04,267
So, then you went out there
for no reason. That's...
1121
01:00:04,268 --> 01:00:06,302
I moved, dude.
1122
01:00:06,303 --> 01:00:08,304
I don't know why you're
taking it so personally.
1123
01:00:08,305 --> 01:00:11,207
Because ever since you
broke up with Cathy,
1124
01:00:11,208 --> 01:00:13,610
you broke us all up. Things have never
been the same between me and Kara...
1125
01:00:13,611 --> 01:00:14,776
That's my fault?
... since you left.
1126
01:00:16,980 --> 01:00:19,349
Dude, I'm responsible for my own
fucked up relationships, not yours.
1127
01:00:19,350 --> 01:00:20,850
Right, okay.
1128
01:00:20,851 --> 01:00:23,386
What about your
fucked up friendships?
1129
01:00:23,387 --> 01:00:25,888
You know, and another... If this is
all, like weird for you, it makes...
1130
01:00:25,889 --> 01:00:28,257
You know, you don't approve
of this, you can ignore me.
1131
01:00:28,258 --> 01:00:29,591
'Cause you're fucking
awesome at it.
1132
01:00:32,895 --> 01:00:36,065
Take the booty call, Stan.
Kara?
1133
01:00:36,066 --> 01:00:38,133
What... What is this?
What are you doing here?
1134
01:00:38,668 --> 01:00:40,335
Go to the show, Stan.
1135
01:00:41,104 --> 01:00:42,404
Where's Cathy?
1136
01:00:42,839 --> 01:00:44,105
She's out.
1137
01:00:45,842 --> 01:00:47,208
What do you mean?
Like with somebody?
1138
01:00:47,844 --> 01:00:49,310
She's moving on, Stan.
1139
01:00:50,780 --> 01:00:52,080
All right? You should go
and do the same thing.
1140
01:00:53,916 --> 01:00:55,216
But...
1141
01:01:09,799 --> 01:01:11,099
Oh, shit.
1142
01:01:18,041 --> 01:01:19,909
Okay.
I know this.
1143
01:01:19,910 --> 01:01:21,075
512...
1144
01:01:22,145 --> 01:01:23,445
7...
1145
01:01:26,082 --> 01:01:27,382
Fuck!
1146
01:01:30,319 --> 01:01:31,653
So...
1147
01:01:33,356 --> 01:01:35,723
Gonna have to unbutton
my shirt, doctor.
1148
01:01:39,095 --> 01:01:41,529
Oh, no.
1149
01:01:52,709 --> 01:01:55,143
All right, there you,
there you go.
1150
01:01:56,179 --> 01:01:57,612
Oh!
1151
01:01:59,215 --> 01:02:00,783
May I?
1152
01:02:00,784 --> 01:02:01,950
You're the doctor.
1153
01:02:07,156 --> 01:02:08,790
Very nice.
Hmm.
1154
01:02:10,226 --> 01:02:11,493
Very nice.
1155
01:02:16,399 --> 01:02:18,935
You know, I have
a pretty good one myself.
1156
01:02:18,936 --> 01:02:20,835
You're damn well gonna
show it to me.
1157
01:02:21,370 --> 01:02:23,873
Now, I'm gonna have to
1158
01:02:23,874 --> 01:02:26,442
lift up my skirt.
No.
1159
01:02:26,443 --> 01:02:27,909
Yeah.
Don't you dare.
1160
01:02:28,911 --> 01:02:31,446
Don't you...
Lift up...
1161
01:02:31,914 --> 01:02:33,681
Okay, okay.
1162
01:02:36,085 --> 01:02:38,454
That is...
1163
01:02:38,455 --> 01:02:40,488
A beauty.
That's...
1164
01:02:40,857 --> 01:02:42,291
Yeah.
1165
01:02:42,292 --> 01:02:43,359
Softball.
Hmm.
1166
01:02:43,360 --> 01:02:45,762
Junior year.
1167
01:02:45,763 --> 01:02:48,531
I bumped into the ball
machine while it was spinning
1168
01:02:48,532 --> 01:02:51,534
and...
1169
01:02:51,535 --> 01:02:53,501
Damn, girl! Hmm.
Yeah.
1170
01:02:53,836 --> 01:02:55,170
Um...
1171
01:02:59,242 --> 01:03:00,642
Uh, looks like it healed
up pretty good, though.
1172
01:03:13,190 --> 01:03:14,957
Yeah!
Now.
1173
01:03:14,958 --> 01:03:16,793
Who's next?
Let's see who's next here.
1174
01:03:16,794 --> 01:03:18,394
We got...
1175
01:03:18,395 --> 01:03:21,429
Fuckasaurus Sex!
1176
01:03:23,232 --> 01:03:26,002
Welcome back,
young man. Welcome back.
1177
01:03:26,003 --> 01:03:28,337
You got anything to say
before you get started, Sex?
1178
01:03:28,338 --> 01:03:31,474
I do, yeah. Uh, this one is also
dedicated to my ex-girlfriend,
1179
01:03:31,475 --> 01:03:34,010
uh, Kara, who's a bitch.
1180
01:03:34,011 --> 01:03:36,279
And this is about fucking her
pussy, or as I like to call it,
1181
01:03:36,280 --> 01:03:37,914
"Visiting Carlsbad camp. "
1182
01:03:37,915 --> 01:03:40,415
Ho! Let's go!
1183
01:03:42,319 --> 01:03:43,785
Hello!
1184
01:04:06,076 --> 01:04:07,208
Biggest pussy
in the world!
1185
01:04:14,116 --> 01:04:15,617
Paintings on the wall.
1186
01:04:17,053 --> 01:04:18,186
How deep is it in there?
1187
01:04:27,930 --> 01:04:29,297
I'm in a horrible place!
1188
01:04:32,635 --> 01:04:34,503
Are you?
Oh, shit.
1189
01:04:34,504 --> 01:04:36,571
Are you gonna go up? Uh, no,
I'm just making a phone call.
1190
01:04:38,174 --> 01:04:40,509
Can you make it outside so
that we could... Yeah, yeah.
1191
01:04:40,510 --> 01:04:41,709
Thanks.
1192
01:04:52,622 --> 01:04:53,921
Justine's?
1193
01:04:55,391 --> 01:04:56,891
Yeah, have you been
here before?
1194
01:04:57,326 --> 01:04:59,262
Uh, yeah.
1195
01:04:59,263 --> 01:05:01,664
Uh, a long time ago.
1196
01:05:01,665 --> 01:05:02,830
It's pretty great,
isn't it?
1197
01:05:03,532 --> 01:05:04,799
Yeah.
1198
01:05:19,015 --> 01:05:21,749
♪ Oh,
I know I've been a menace
1199
01:05:22,985 --> 01:05:28,624
♪ Oh, I know I've been
a trial
1200
01:05:28,625 --> 01:05:31,659
♪ And you've washed
your hands of love
1201
01:05:34,964 --> 01:05:39,068
♪ But I made a Bible promise
1202
01:05:39,069 --> 01:05:42,503
♪ Cross my heart
and hope to die
1203
01:05:44,040 --> 01:05:46,175
♪ Till all is blue
1204
01:05:46,176 --> 01:05:48,943
♪ I'll be here waiting, honey
1205
01:05:49,478 --> 01:05:52,415
What will it be, stumbles?
1206
01:05:52,416 --> 01:05:55,049
Uh, just a water.
All right.
1207
01:05:57,353 --> 01:05:59,454
♪ So come on
1208
01:05:59,722 --> 01:06:01,691
♪ Answer
1209
01:06:01,692 --> 01:06:05,460
♪ Why don't you answer?
Answer
1210
01:06:06,395 --> 01:06:08,629
♪ There's a summer on
1211
01:06:10,967 --> 01:06:14,969
♪ And it's pulling up
the wallpaper
1212
01:06:16,005 --> 01:06:18,940
♪ With its wicked drone
1213
01:06:22,411 --> 01:06:24,846
♪ And I could sit here with
1214
01:06:26,182 --> 01:06:29,951
♪ With just a sliver
of your taffeta
1215
01:06:31,253 --> 01:06:34,021
♪ But that is not enough
1216
01:06:36,459 --> 01:06:38,559
♪ Oh
1217
01:06:39,528 --> 01:06:43,131
♪ I'm screaming
at your door
1218
01:06:44,233 --> 01:06:46,401
♪ So come on
1219
01:06:46,502 --> 01:06:48,304
♪ Answer
1220
01:06:48,305 --> 01:06:51,607
♪ Why don't you answer?
Answer
1221
01:06:51,608 --> 01:06:55,011
♪ Oh, my love
1222
01:06:55,012 --> 01:06:58,446
♪ I will forever, oh
1223
01:06:59,115 --> 01:07:01,384
♪ So little
1224
01:07:01,385 --> 01:07:03,552
♪ Withholder
1225
01:07:03,553 --> 01:07:06,854
♪ Why don't you answer?
Answer ♪
1226
01:07:07,123 --> 01:07:08,723
Thank you.
1227
01:07:10,059 --> 01:07:12,328
This,
1228
01:07:12,329 --> 01:07:15,498
you don't wanna know what this stuff
is made out of, I assure you, but...
1229
01:07:15,499 --> 01:07:17,767
You know, can you actually
give me one quick second?
1230
01:07:17,768 --> 01:07:19,100
Of course.
Okay.
1231
01:07:31,647 --> 01:07:33,182
Oh, you were fucking
incredible!
1232
01:07:33,183 --> 01:07:34,817
Like, I don't even know
how to put it into words.
1233
01:07:34,818 --> 01:07:37,420
I would need so many
different adjectives.
1234
01:07:37,421 --> 01:07:40,389
I would need a whole new
combo adjective.
1235
01:07:40,390 --> 01:07:42,691
Like you're
fantasi-spectacul-awesome?
1236
01:07:42,692 --> 01:07:45,394
That comes close. That
was good.
1237
01:07:45,395 --> 01:07:46,729
Well, it's very nice
of you to say that.
1238
01:07:46,730 --> 01:07:51,132
Oh, yeah, of course. I don't wanna
lose my good Samaritan status.
1239
01:07:51,834 --> 01:07:53,167
Very sweet of you.
1240
01:07:54,437 --> 01:07:56,305
Hey, do you wanna smoke?
1241
01:07:56,306 --> 01:07:57,773
Oh, uh, no, no,
I'm fine.
1242
01:07:57,774 --> 01:07:59,308
Okay.
But go ahead.
1243
01:07:59,309 --> 01:08:01,210
Yeah? Yeah, yeah. No, I like the smell.
1244
01:08:01,211 --> 01:08:02,244
I'll be your look out.
1245
01:08:02,245 --> 01:08:03,746
Thank you.
1246
01:08:03,747 --> 01:08:05,414
I think everyone else
on this street is stoned,
1247
01:08:05,415 --> 01:08:06,914
so you're in good company.
1248
01:08:24,700 --> 01:08:27,001
Sorry.
1249
01:08:29,305 --> 01:08:30,473
Go ahead, take it.
1250
01:08:30,474 --> 01:08:32,073
Oh, no, no.
That's okay.
1251
01:08:34,510 --> 01:08:35,810
You sure?
Yeah.
1252
01:08:37,179 --> 01:08:38,346
Okay.
1253
01:08:40,516 --> 01:08:42,151
Actually, you know, is
there any left? Yeah.
1254
01:08:42,152 --> 01:08:43,718
Yeah, thanks.
Go ahead.
1255
01:08:44,320 --> 01:08:45,753
I'll be your look out.
1256
01:08:53,462 --> 01:08:56,732
Oh.
1257
01:08:56,733 --> 01:08:59,602
Whoa! Man, slow down,
funky town. You okay?
1258
01:08:59,603 --> 01:09:01,569
Good, I'm good.
1259
01:09:18,354 --> 01:09:21,490
Hugh G. Rection, that's enough,
thank you very, very much.
1260
01:09:21,491 --> 01:09:24,160
Whoa!
Man down.
1261
01:09:24,161 --> 01:09:26,228
Man down.
1262
01:09:26,229 --> 01:09:29,832
That was a very admirable
effort, ladies and gentlemen.
1263
01:09:29,833 --> 01:09:34,336
But perhaps we learned that
being intoxicated isn't enough.
1264
01:09:34,337 --> 01:09:37,339
You've also gotta
have a story.
1265
01:09:37,340 --> 01:09:41,177
Don't come up on this stage
without a story, folks.
1266
01:09:41,178 --> 01:09:43,110
That's what we
wanna see, all right?
1267
01:09:43,779 --> 01:09:45,947
Who's up next?
Who's up next?
1268
01:09:46,582 --> 01:09:48,884
Let me see.
1269
01:09:48,885 --> 01:09:51,353
Oh, oh, dirty lady,
you can't come up here.
1270
01:09:51,354 --> 01:09:52,688
Get the fuck off
the stage, you bag lady!
1271
01:09:52,689 --> 01:09:54,055
Shit, really?
1272
01:09:55,858 --> 01:10:00,329
Ooh, this is highly
unusual, but...
1273
01:10:00,330 --> 01:10:03,265
Fuck it. I make the rules
as we go anyway.
1274
01:10:03,266 --> 01:10:05,601
And this is too good
to pass up.
1275
01:10:05,602 --> 01:10:08,903
We got another
performer, folks!
1276
01:10:11,740 --> 01:10:13,943
You didn't fucking
qualify, bitch! Get down.
1277
01:10:13,944 --> 01:10:15,945
Ladies and gentlemen,
I give to you,
1278
01:10:15,946 --> 01:10:18,280
the one and hopefully only,
1279
01:10:18,281 --> 01:10:22,585
"Jeff Brown eats his own
boogers and I should know
1280
01:10:22,586 --> 01:10:26,020
"because I used to live
with the fucking loser. "
1281
01:10:29,658 --> 01:10:31,359
You got anything
to say up top?
1282
01:10:32,494 --> 01:10:35,698
Yeah. My real name
is Kara Jenkins.
1283
01:10:35,699 --> 01:10:39,301
And uh, this is my interpretation of
what's it like to have sex with a penis
1284
01:10:39,302 --> 01:10:40,768
the size of a toothpick.
1285
01:10:43,473 --> 01:10:44,640
This is gonna be
exciting, folks.
1286
01:10:44,641 --> 01:10:46,641
Hit it!
1287
01:11:04,727 --> 01:11:06,727
Oh, no, ma'am.
What?
1288
01:11:36,625 --> 01:11:38,560
So then, you've,
so you've performed...
1289
01:11:38,561 --> 01:11:41,497
Well, in a living room,
I did, yeah. Oh, gosh.
1290
01:11:41,498 --> 01:11:43,397
That's terrifying.
1291
01:11:45,801 --> 01:11:47,301
Are you sure you're okay? Great, yeah.
1292
01:11:49,004 --> 01:11:50,304
Um...
1293
01:11:50,973 --> 01:11:52,173
So are you, uh...
1294
01:11:53,842 --> 01:11:56,143
Like, on a label?
No, not yet.
1295
01:11:57,913 --> 01:11:59,948
Wait, that's dumb,
you know.
1296
01:11:59,949 --> 01:12:01,984
I don't know, you just
seem so, you're so good.
1297
01:12:01,985 --> 01:12:03,719
Thank you.
1298
01:12:03,720 --> 01:12:06,388
Well, I've come close
a few times and...
1299
01:12:06,389 --> 01:12:08,524
Recently, a few very
influential nerds on the internet
1300
01:12:08,525 --> 01:12:10,426
have written about me, so...
1301
01:12:10,427 --> 01:12:12,594
Wow, do you have a pretty big
internet footprint, would you say?
1302
01:12:12,595 --> 01:12:14,328
Um... What if I googled you right now?
1303
01:12:14,697 --> 01:12:15,996
What would I find?
1304
01:12:16,332 --> 01:12:17,633
I don't know.
1305
01:12:17,634 --> 01:12:19,735
What was the song
that you, um...
1306
01:12:19,736 --> 01:12:21,135
Oh, I haven't
put that one.
1307
01:12:21,704 --> 01:12:22,970
I haven't put that up yet.
1308
01:12:23,806 --> 01:12:25,206
Shit!
1309
01:12:26,875 --> 01:12:28,911
What's up?
Is that pretty strong?
1310
01:12:28,912 --> 01:12:31,112
Uh, stuff that we...
That we smoked? Um...
1311
01:12:31,847 --> 01:12:34,383
Not really.
I'm spinning.
1312
01:12:34,384 --> 01:12:35,784
You're spinning?
Yep.
1313
01:12:35,785 --> 01:12:37,086
I think we should
probably lie down.
1314
01:12:37,087 --> 01:12:38,486
Oh, okay.
1315
01:12:38,721 --> 01:12:40,521
Here we go.
1316
01:12:48,364 --> 01:12:49,563
Um...
1317
01:12:52,668 --> 01:12:54,803
No, that's okay.
1318
01:12:54,804 --> 01:12:57,805
That's... that's okay.
I'm, um...
1319
01:13:00,008 --> 01:13:01,643
Oh, God.
1320
01:13:01,644 --> 01:13:03,645
No, no.
Oh!
1321
01:13:03,646 --> 01:13:06,882
Ah, shit. Why did I
smoke? I never smoke.
1322
01:13:06,883 --> 01:13:08,349
I don't know, why did you?
1323
01:13:09,017 --> 01:13:11,252
You looked so cool
doing it, and...
1324
01:13:11,620 --> 01:13:13,020
I'm an idiot, I think.
1325
01:13:13,722 --> 01:13:15,924
It's okay.
1326
01:13:15,925 --> 01:13:18,125
You are also very
cute. Yeah, so are you.
1327
01:13:19,027 --> 01:13:20,396
You know,
I'm still spinning.
1328
01:13:20,397 --> 01:13:21,764
So, I can't even...
1329
01:13:21,765 --> 01:13:23,097
Don't, don't.
There's like three of you.
1330
01:13:25,434 --> 01:13:26,468
Just talk about normal stuff. Okay.
1331
01:13:26,469 --> 01:13:27,970
Yeah, I'm normal.
1332
01:13:27,971 --> 01:13:30,105
So, what about you? What is
your thing, what do you do?
1333
01:13:30,106 --> 01:13:32,574
Uh, writing...
Sitcom.
1334
01:13:32,575 --> 01:13:34,443
Really?
Where can I see it?
1335
01:13:34,444 --> 01:13:36,645
No, you can't.
It's, uh...
1336
01:13:36,646 --> 01:13:40,549
Too weird, but still
trying and I'm doing
1337
01:13:40,550 --> 01:13:42,483
a restaurant job in LA
like everybody else there.
1338
01:13:43,419 --> 01:13:45,687
LA, huh?
1339
01:13:45,688 --> 01:13:47,988
Mr. 213, it all makes sense now. Yeah.
1340
01:13:49,124 --> 01:13:50,859
What part of town
do you live in?
1341
01:13:50,860 --> 01:13:52,993
Glendale.
I live in Los Feliz.
1342
01:13:53,595 --> 01:13:57,633
The eastsiders.
Yes.
1343
01:13:57,634 --> 01:13:59,834
Anything west to the 101 sort
of makes me wanna kill myself.
1344
01:14:02,638 --> 01:14:05,005
Okay, yeah, laughing hurts
actually, that's... Oh, no.
1345
01:14:06,842 --> 01:14:08,710
Well, if we can't laugh
and you can't look at me,
1346
01:14:08,711 --> 01:14:09,910
what else do we have
to do here?
1347
01:14:12,881 --> 01:14:15,150
Oh, shit. Haley,
I have to, uh...
1348
01:14:15,151 --> 01:14:16,984
Tell you about
something, um...
1349
01:14:19,955 --> 01:14:21,590
Your phone?
1350
01:14:21,591 --> 01:14:25,192
There's a voicemail on
here from my ex-girlfriend.
1351
01:14:25,861 --> 01:14:28,697
And I don't know
what it says.
1352
01:14:28,698 --> 01:14:30,632
Maybe she wants to get back together
or maybe she's telling me to fuck off.
1353
01:14:30,633 --> 01:14:32,333
Because, I, um...
1354
01:14:33,869 --> 01:14:36,672
I came here
on a day's notice,
1355
01:14:36,673 --> 01:14:38,138
'cause I found out that
she was coming.
1356
01:14:39,975 --> 01:14:42,610
But then I met you, and...
1357
01:14:44,213 --> 01:14:46,014
It has been
1358
01:14:46,015 --> 01:14:48,148
awesome, but I just, just, if
I don't listen to it, I'm...
1359
01:14:54,590 --> 01:14:55,723
You should listen to it.
1360
01:15:02,064 --> 01:15:03,364
Thank you
for coming tonight.
1361
01:15:05,133 --> 01:15:06,400
And...
I'm sorry.
1362
01:15:07,903 --> 01:15:10,437
Don't worry about it.
Good luck with the lady.
1363
01:15:12,174 --> 01:15:13,574
Are you gonna be okay?
1364
01:15:13,942 --> 01:15:15,609
Yeah, I'll be fine.
1365
01:15:20,916 --> 01:15:22,251
And now...
1366
01:15:22,252 --> 01:15:24,518
Booger! That's it.
1367
01:15:29,224 --> 01:15:31,959
And now, Saurus Sex.
1368
01:15:32,294 --> 01:15:34,395
Oh, yeah.
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
1369
01:15:37,534 --> 01:15:40,267
Booger!
Saurus!
1370
01:15:44,206 --> 01:15:47,543
Ladies and gentlemen,
I think we got a tie.
1371
01:15:47,544 --> 01:15:50,178
It's a fuck-off.
1372
01:15:50,179 --> 01:15:52,214
Yeah!
1373
01:15:52,215 --> 01:15:54,850
All right, all right.
Yeah.
1374
01:15:54,851 --> 01:15:57,553
Y'all know the rules.
In a fuck-off,
1375
01:15:57,554 --> 01:16:00,989
there are no rules,
except, no touching.
1376
01:16:00,990 --> 01:16:04,927
Keep the sex in the air,
not the genitals!
1377
01:16:04,928 --> 01:16:06,493
Music, please.
1378
01:16:36,858 --> 01:16:38,325
Yeah!
1379
01:16:40,128 --> 01:16:42,296
Oh, shit!
1380
01:17:23,839 --> 01:17:26,875
What are you doing?
No touching.
1381
01:17:26,876 --> 01:17:29,610
It's a violation! Break
it up. Break it up.
1382
01:17:48,730 --> 01:17:50,064
Hi, Stan.
1383
01:17:52,901 --> 01:17:54,334
Wow, um...
1384
01:17:55,837 --> 01:17:58,472
I haven't said those
words in months.
1385
01:17:59,174 --> 01:18:00,407
Um...
1386
01:18:03,445 --> 01:18:06,313
I was just calling,
because, um...
1387
01:18:12,320 --> 01:18:14,521
Because, um...
1388
01:18:16,458 --> 01:18:18,525
I'm sorry, I'm...
1389
01:18:19,928 --> 01:18:22,696
I'm so sorry.
I'm, I'm being an idiot.
1390
01:18:36,178 --> 01:18:38,178
Okay, um...
1391
01:18:42,117 --> 01:18:43,817
Thank you for dinner.
1392
01:18:45,420 --> 01:18:46,887
Absolutely.
1393
01:18:53,128 --> 01:18:54,528
Okay.
1394
01:18:59,801 --> 01:19:01,001
Well, have
a good night.
1395
01:19:02,104 --> 01:19:03,337
You, too.
1396
01:19:27,195 --> 01:19:29,331
Mmm... Wait.
1397
01:19:29,332 --> 01:19:31,233
Oh, one second.
Are you kidding me?
1398
01:19:31,234 --> 01:19:33,902
Oh, it's Cathy.
Are you kidding me?
1399
01:19:33,903 --> 01:19:35,103
Hey, girl, what's up?
1400
01:19:35,104 --> 01:19:36,972
I ruined the date.
I... I ruined it!
1401
01:19:36,973 --> 01:19:38,006
I just, just...
1402
01:19:38,007 --> 01:19:39,241
Obliterated it!
1403
01:19:39,242 --> 01:19:43,845
I dropped
the toast and I started crying.
1404
01:19:43,846 --> 01:19:46,381
And he took me to Justine's.
Justine's of all places!
1405
01:19:46,382 --> 01:19:48,450
Oh, my God, he took
you to Justine's.
1406
01:19:48,451 --> 01:19:49,951
He must've really
wanted to fuck you.
1407
01:19:49,952 --> 01:19:52,187
Who cares who wants
to fuck Cathy?
1408
01:19:52,188 --> 01:19:54,389
Cathy, I'm leaking into my pants
right now. Put a cork in it, asshole.
1409
01:19:54,390 --> 01:19:56,558
Wait, is that Jeff?
What's going on?
1410
01:19:56,559 --> 01:19:58,492
Are you guys
back together? Maybe.
1411
01:20:05,902 --> 01:20:07,135
Oh, my God.
1412
01:20:07,136 --> 01:20:08,537
He's calling me.
Who, Tim?
1413
01:20:08,538 --> 01:20:10,438
No, no, it's Stan.
1414
01:20:10,439 --> 01:20:13,507
Stan's calling you?
Oh, that fucking loser.
1415
01:20:15,845 --> 01:20:17,010
Oh, shit.
Not now, dude.
1416
01:20:19,148 --> 01:20:21,383
Look, you're right, I'm
sorry. I bailed on you tonight.
1417
01:20:21,384 --> 01:20:23,418
I bailed on you the last six
months. I don't care if you do
1418
01:20:23,419 --> 01:20:25,287
slam poetry,
I don't care if you air sex.
1419
01:20:25,288 --> 01:20:28,323
Awesome, awesome.
Great, dude, I'm stoked.
1420
01:20:28,324 --> 01:20:30,525
Listen, I need a favor.
What?
1421
01:20:30,526 --> 01:20:32,561
I need you to apologize to
Cathy, tell her you love her.
1422
01:20:32,562 --> 01:20:34,896
Make up with her, move back to
Austin and have little Stanleys.
1423
01:20:34,897 --> 01:20:37,265
I don't care, but you gotta get her
off the phone with my girlfriend,
1424
01:20:37,266 --> 01:20:39,034
because she's blocking me from
getting the pussy that I deserve.
1425
01:20:39,035 --> 01:20:40,168
Deserve?
Shut up.
1426
01:20:40,169 --> 01:20:41,536
Fuck you!
Shut up!
1427
01:20:41,537 --> 01:20:43,238
Wait, she's on the phone
with Kara, right now?
1428
01:20:43,239 --> 01:20:44,506
Wait, who's Jeff talking to?
1429
01:20:44,507 --> 01:20:46,508
Who do you think?
1430
01:20:46,509 --> 01:20:48,242
You know, just talk
to each other.
1431
01:20:53,148 --> 01:20:54,915
Guys, talk. Use your words, please, go.
1432
01:21:01,022 --> 01:21:02,256
Okay, seriously?
1433
01:21:03,525 --> 01:21:06,094
Look, you guys either
belong together or you don't,
1434
01:21:06,095 --> 01:21:08,363
but this wishy-washy-in-between
shit has gotta go.
1435
01:21:08,364 --> 01:21:10,365
Actually, Stan, I know
what you should do. Listen,
1436
01:21:10,366 --> 01:21:12,934
there's edible underwear in the
medicine cabinet at Redge's house.
1437
01:21:12,935 --> 01:21:14,870
The red ones taste terrible, but
the other... How do you know that?
1438
01:21:14,871 --> 01:21:16,471
Because, we were stoned
and we had no food
1439
01:21:16,472 --> 01:21:19,441
Just shut up, shut up.
Or...
1440
01:21:19,442 --> 01:21:21,276
Forgive each other for
ruining a great relationship
1441
01:21:21,277 --> 01:21:23,945
and move on.
Either way we love you.
1442
01:21:23,946 --> 01:21:27,249
Stan, for bailing on me because
I was incredible on stage tonight.
1443
01:21:27,250 --> 01:21:29,416
Oh, I fucking destroyed
you! Everybody knows that...
1444
01:21:31,920 --> 01:21:33,387
It's not that kind
of cab, guys.
1445
01:22:29,577 --> 01:22:30,911
Hi.
1446
01:22:32,047 --> 01:22:33,447
Hey.
1447
01:22:34,149 --> 01:22:35,549
Look out.
1448
01:23:09,117 --> 01:23:10,450
Are you okay?
1449
01:24:09,344 --> 01:24:11,044
Is my penis, really,
really that small?
1450
01:24:12,814 --> 01:24:14,147
Honestly?
1451
01:24:16,618 --> 01:24:17,884
I love it.
1452
01:24:24,325 --> 01:24:25,659
And what about
1453
01:24:26,227 --> 01:24:27,494
my cavern?
1454
01:24:29,330 --> 01:24:32,367
It's like
a little child's.
1455
01:24:32,368 --> 01:24:34,534
Better not know what that
fucking feels like, you pedo.
1456
01:24:37,439 --> 01:24:39,506
I was complimenting
your vagina.
1457
01:24:41,242 --> 01:24:42,811
I said a nice thing.
1458
01:24:42,812 --> 01:24:44,644
You hit me in the
fucking ear with a chip.
1459
01:24:55,490 --> 01:24:56,723
Hey.
1460
01:24:59,194 --> 01:25:00,295
Good to see you, Cathy.
Oh.
1461
01:25:00,296 --> 01:25:02,597
Bye, Jeff.
1462
01:25:02,598 --> 01:25:04,833
Ah, you called a cab? Just give
me two minutes, I can take you.
1463
01:25:04,834 --> 01:25:07,202
No, no, I, uh,
heard you, um...
1464
01:25:07,203 --> 01:25:10,305
Using the microwave
this morning.
1465
01:25:10,306 --> 01:25:12,205
And I didn't wanna bug.
1466
01:25:15,810 --> 01:25:17,845
So, did you guys talk?
1467
01:25:17,846 --> 01:25:19,513
Um, no.
1468
01:25:20,181 --> 01:25:23,118
Nope, we did not.
1469
01:25:23,119 --> 01:25:25,585
Then why are you smiling?
We did not talk at all.
1470
01:25:27,856 --> 01:25:29,424
Oh!
1471
01:25:29,425 --> 01:25:31,793
Fuck, yes!
1472
01:25:31,794 --> 01:25:33,328
Mmm.
What?
1473
01:25:33,329 --> 01:25:35,563
Oh!
1474
01:25:35,564 --> 01:25:37,832
Oh, shit!
I'm so sore.
1475
01:25:37,833 --> 01:25:39,267
Oh, that's my girl.
I'm so sore.
1476
01:25:39,268 --> 01:25:40,567
Yeah.
1477
01:25:48,143 --> 01:25:49,777
You called a cab?
1478
01:25:49,778 --> 01:25:52,679
Yeah, I didn't know
if I was gonna see you.
1479
01:25:56,684 --> 01:25:59,654
Oh, don't. It's no problem.
1480
01:25:59,655 --> 01:26:01,955
I'm actually very surprised
to see you in pants this early.
1481
01:26:02,323 --> 01:26:03,590
Pants.
1482
01:26:06,728 --> 01:26:07,994
Did you call her?
1483
01:26:08,496 --> 01:26:10,263
No.
No?
1484
01:26:11,266 --> 01:26:13,568
Why are you glowing?
What?
1485
01:26:13,569 --> 01:26:15,670
Why are you so happy?
1486
01:26:15,671 --> 01:26:17,639
Why are you happy? What
happened last night, huh?
1487
01:26:17,640 --> 01:26:19,207
Did you call that new girl?
1488
01:26:19,208 --> 01:26:21,176
Did you have sex
with that new girl?
1489
01:26:21,177 --> 01:26:22,410
Did you fuck that new
girl? Oh, we made love
1490
01:26:22,411 --> 01:26:24,846
and it was so sweet.
1491
01:26:24,847 --> 01:26:26,781
Dude, she's such a good
cuddler. What are you doing?
1492
01:26:26,782 --> 01:26:29,684
We talked for hours. Get off
me! You're not doing it right.
1493
01:26:29,685 --> 01:26:31,853
That's not the way you do
that. Get rid of the cab,
1494
01:26:31,854 --> 01:26:34,355
I'm driving you to the
airport, Jesus Christ!
1495
01:26:34,356 --> 01:26:37,090
Hey, listen man, can I just
give you ten bucks?
104674
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