All language subtitles for The Cook the Thief His Wife and Her Lover 1989 Bluray 1080p DTS-HD AC3 AVC NL-RetailSub REMUX

( Dogs barking )

( TirQs spuoaling )

( Dogs barking )

- GQ and gQt thQ dQgs.

CQry, Mows!

CQmo Qc, nQw.
OPon yQur mouth.

OPcn yQur mQuth, oh?

Lcarn tQ oPProciato
yQur fQQd, oh?

CQmParod tQ
what you sQo uP

in that di littlQ
CantQQn Qf yQurs,

thiS iS
a throo-star suPPor.

You must lQarn
tho rulQs.

I nood tQ oot ond drick
thQ vQry boGt

and that's QxPonsivo.

Havc you ovQr hoord
Qf chickon å la Reine Marie

or oyster sauce MorDay
or trog's Iegs Parisienne?

NQ. 'CQursQ you havQc't.

Tako his pantS down!
Tako his pantS down.

( DQgs barking, yQIPing )

( Man scrQaming )

Oh dQar,
Oh dQor, Oh door.

Didn't yQur daddy tQach you
tQ wiPo yQur bQffQm, Oh?

- Alherti
Leave him alone-

- CQmo On, lQt's Qat.
- Oh, lct'S Qat.

BofQrQ wQ oat,
OcQrgina,

wQ must fQQd
and watQr thQ animals.

RQy!

This is my wifc,
GeQrgina Spica.

Sho's gQt a hcart Qf gQld
and a body tQ match.

I am AlbQrt SPica
ond I havo a hoart Qf gQld

acd a grQat dQal
Qf mQnQy tQ match.

And you arQ RQy,
whQ's got absQlutcly nQthing,

cxccPt whot you QwQ mQ.

You aro humiliatQd
ic frQct Qf a lady.

YQu'rQ humiliatod
in frQnt Qf us.

GQQr0ica, I'll bo aG qoick
as I pQssibly can.

You gQ and gQt mo
sQmQ hQt wator, Oh?

Acd a towQI and soaP.

NQw-- yQah.

UQw I'vQ givon you a 0QQd dinnor
ond you Can havo a nicQ drink.

NQw, you bQhavQ yQursQlf ic
futurQ and Pay whcn I aGk you.

- NQ, nQ, cQ!

- Or noxt timQ I'll makQ you
oat yQur own shit

affcr hrSt fQrcing it
Qut Qf you

through your dick
like toothraste-

No, rut that away,
Srangler.

CQr blimQy,
thoro's a lady Prosent.

ShQ dQcSn't won't tQ GQQ yQur
Ghrivolod cQntributions.

Ah. That'G it.

Thank you very much.

UiCo, clQan...
givo mo that tQwol!

OivQ mQ that.

Yoah.

I ncvQr likQd thot ChinQso
fQQd but lQQking at you nQw,

I likQ it evQn loGs.

RightQ, bQys!

WQ must surprisQ Richard
On Qur annivQrsary.

Bring thc lofforG.

OcQrgic, you gQt smudgQ On
your facQ and ash On yQur tits.

If yQu'rQ gonna wcar
black, dQn't GmQkQ.

You lQok likQ
a tart in black.

- It'G nQt block,
it's bluQ.

- It's black,
acd don't smQkQ.

Ił's sloppy in a woman.

Sesides, no one
who's going to eat smokes.

It ruins yQur tastQ budG,
burnG yQur tQnguQ

and makQs
yQur Pee stick.

- Rubbish.

- It's not bloody rubbish.

L'vQ GmQlt thQ lQQ affQr
yQu've bccn Piddling ic thQrQ.

WhQn arc you gQnno
loarn, smartarso?

- ♪ Have mercy uron me-.- ♪

- CQmc On, hurry uP, bQys.

- ♪ Have mercy uron me-.- ♪

- RightQ, lads, got thQm numbors
uP thorc, SPica & BQarst.

- ♪ SIQt Qut
my transgrQssiQns ♪

♪ FurgQ mQ with hysGQp ♪

♪ And I Shall bc clcan ♪

♪ Wasb mQ... ♪

♪ Wash mc ♪

♪ And I shall bQ
whiter than snQw. ♪

- Whoro'G Richord?

- Ho's PIucking.

- Ho's Plucking, Oh?
Richard!

Richard!
WhQrQ aro you?

StQp that Plucking.
WhQrQ aro you?

NQw what's that?

That's A-S-R...

that's nQnscnSQ.

SPcll it right,
fQr Christ's sokQ.

BIQQdy holl.
Richard!

Rich-- ah!

Thoro you ore, Richord.

Now, loavQ that Qut and cQmQ
and SQQ what I'vQ gQt you, Oh?

L'vQ brQught you
a prQsont.

This is Qur annivorsary.

Throo mQnths Qf mutual
undQrstanding, Qb, Ricbard?

Throo months sincQ
I first invitQd you

tQ be my favQritQ
restauratQur.

- Mr. SPica,
this is a duck.

Ducks aro hQrn
witb tbQ fQathors On,

but it's yQur dinncr,
Mr. SPica.

If you want tho foothQrs
tQ romain,

wo cQuld try tho dish,

I suPPQsQ, by lQoving
tho foathQrs as thoy arQ.

( SPcaking FrQnch )

- MitChol, you mulQ.

HQrQ, Ricbard,
cQmQ and GQQ, cQmQ On.

Hurry uP, hurry uP.
RloasQ, I bQg you.

ComQ on.

HQrQ, GQQrgino, hQw many timQS
havQ I tQld you?

NQ smQking
in thc kitchQn.

MitchQl, 0Qt your arsc
dQwn horo quick.

ComQ on.

NQw, Richard, this is yQur--
wQll, Qur-- Qur nQw sign.

Da-da-da-da-da-da!

WallQP!

( Chccring )

( Hissing )

- Oh, GQd!

- RiChard.

It's dark
in thc rQGtouront.

- Ycs, RhilliPo.

ThankS tQ
Mr. SPica's gQnQrQsity,

it is dark Qvorywhorc.

No rower, no Iight-

Were you thinking ot a cold
öuffet tonight, Mr. Srica?

- Sut I don't want
a cold öuffet.

- Paté d'aloueftes
with a chicQry SaucQ.

- Patö d'alouerfes with
a cbiCory saucc.

- Rrine de Caneton.
- Terrine de Caneton.

- CQld turkcy with lomQn
and basilica.

- CQld turkey with
thQ lomQn and basilica.

- AnchQviQG
ic garlic vicQgar.

- It dQQsn't havQ tQ bo cQld,
yQu'vo gQt gas.

You#ve gQt 0as,
fQr GQd's sakc!

( WhistlQs )

- Oot an arse on her like two
greased watermelons in a sack.

- Cold chicken,
rałé d'alouerfes,

salade de Iangoustine,

gätoau dQ corQffQs
ot GruyérQ...

- You-- you Put thcm
QIQCtriCs right, MitChol.

Put thom oloctrics
right Qr...

- You don't eat.
- You dQn't Qat.

I tQld you nQt tQ smQko.

- I GhQuld Gtond still,
Mr. SPica.

Or whQ knQws?

You might sroil something,
rut your foot in something.

- So, a hot meal
for tonight, eh, Richard?

SQmQthing sPocial,
PleaGo, Oh?

HQw abQut somQ-- sQmo
IQs hQrs d'QQuvrQs, Qr,

gåteau au Poivres,
terrine et fillet Iamh

et poison au
er, roi, roi--

- It's roisson-
- What did you say, GQQrgiQ?

What did you say tQ mQ?
What did you say?

What did you say?
What did you say?

- FQissQn.

( Chccring )

- WQll, Mr. SPica,
I hQPQ you arc hungry.

- Always.
Oct in thQrQ, bQyG.

OQ On, GoQrgio, you go
in thoro, raisQ yQur skirts

and warm my soat.

Eh, what dQ you think
thQn, oh, Richord?

( CrashQs )

- If you GpQct as mucb mQcey
On tho mcal, Mr. SPica,

as you wastQ
On tho dQcor,

yQur tastQ in gQQd fQQd
must suroly imPrQvo.

- You'll cheek me
once too often, Soarst-

You rely on me,
don't forget that.

Without me,
you, a foreigner,

you wouldn't last long
around here.

You look out there,
see what I've örought you.

Two vans full of good stuff,
just right tor your kitchen-

- I would not touch it.

- Why on earth not?

- I insist on huying
my own food, Mr. Srica.

Then I can öe sure
ot its guality-

- I roProsQnt quality
rQund horo, SQarst.

My name is knQwn
fQr it.

I Qffor quality
and PrQtQctiQn.

- FrQtoctiQn againGt what,
I wQndQr, Mr. Spico?

And whQm?

- RrQtQctiQn, BQarst, against
thQ raGh tQmPcr Qf my mQn.

Against a GuddQn arrival
Qf fQQd PQisQning.

Against rats.

AgaiDst the puhlic
health inspector-

- It you are hungry tonight,
Mr. Spica,

you are going
to have to wait-

Do uP thQ third buttQn Qf yQur
cxPQnsivQ jackQt, Mr. SPica.

YQu'll fQQl loss
cmPty inSidQ, Mr. SPica.

- You Can't make me wait.

- ♪ Deliver me ♪

♪ rrom hlood-guiltiness ♪

♪ O God ♪

My tongue shall sing aloud

♪ Of Thy righteousness ♪

♪ Have mercy uron me ♪

♪ Slot out
my transgressions ♪

♪ O Lord ♪

♪ Open Thou my Iips ♪

♪ And my mouth shall
show forth Thy praise ♪

♪ And my mQuth shall shQw
forth Thy PraisQ ♪

♪ And my mQuth sholl
GhQw fQrth Thy Praisc ♪

♪ And my mouth ♪

T Shall show forth
Thy rraise. ♪

( SPQaking GQffly )

- No. You dQn't Qat it
likQ that!

Let mo GhQw you.

Oh, imaginQ you arc sucking
thQ little fingorG

Qf a lady Qr-- nQ.

You wouldn't undorGtond
that sinco you wQuld nQvQr

gQt that clQso tQ a lady.

WhQ'd wanna got that clQsQ
tQ you, fQr God'G Gake?

- I wQuldn't bQ sQ intQrQstQd
in hQr hngQrs.

- That'G thQ GQrt Qf rQmark
I'd cxPQct yQu'd mako.

YQu'd just bo intont
On wbipping it in,

whipping it out and wiPing it
On yQur jackQt.

Look at your jacket,
it's like a pig field.

Acd yQur nails
cQuld dQ with a clQon.

SbQw mo yQur nails.

God.

Why can't I havQ sQmQ blQQdy
pualify in my assQciatQs?

FrQm nQw On, anyono who's nQt
PrQPorly washod and droSsod

fQr dinner is gQnna
bavo tQ Pay fQr it.

I'm gonna have
to give you IessoDs.

I'll writQ it all dQwn.
GoQrgino Can tyPQ it out.

"UQtos FQr GQurmQts."

That's FrQnch fQr a gQQd Qator,
iSn't it, BQorGt?

( BurPG )

- GQurmots dQc#t bolch.

- On thc cQntrory,
On tho cQntrary. TbQy dQ.

It GbQwG tbat you arQ
cnjQying a mQal.

NQt with yQur fic0Qrs,
SPanglor!

Ood, that's all you
understand, isn't it?

Things you cat with yQur hands
whilst walking dQwn thQ Gtroot.

- You tQld MQwG tQ Qot
thQ cQIQry with hiS fingorG.

- Well, that's different,
you dope.

And it's asraragus,
not celery.

What's the roint of me
sinking thousaDds

into a resłaurant
if you rersist

in refusing
to eat rrorerly?

Toll bim, Goorgina.

- TQll him what?

- Just cQPy GQQrgica.
ShQ kcQws hQw tQ dQ it.

Cory, get Richard in here.

I want my Gign fixcd uP,
brQught in hQrQ

and put On that wall
QvQr thQ kitchQn door.

If Ricbard was mQro
intorostod in slQgans,

hc'd dQ mQrQ businQss,
mokQ mQrQ mQcQy, eh?

This rlace is too dark.

( BurPG )

- Could do with a respray.

GQId, it nQQdG mQrQ gQld.

How about gQld and bluQ?

What do you thiDk, HeDry?

10,999 should do it--
two months' takings.

You should
get in there, Henry.

BQarst's pricQG arQ all
Qvor tho PIaco.

His hQad'S in tho cloudS.

GQQd CQQk.

Brilliant cQQk!

ExcoPt ho will Put
mushrQQms On cvQrything.

HQnry, Put tbat
cigarQttQ out.

Do you mind it I eat
whilst you smoke?

OordoD choked on a cigarerfe
whilst he was eating.

Surnt his epiglottis.

Thatis right, Mitchel,
you've got one.

And you don't keer it
in your trousers-

( Iaughing )

And you don't put orange rind
on the edge of your plate,

it's moant tQ bo thorQ,
you dQlt!

What yQu'vo gQt tQ rQalizc
iS that a clovQr cQQk

Puts unlikoly things
tQgQthQr likQ duck and Qrango,

like pineapple and ham-

It's called artistry-

You knQw, I'm an ortist,
thQ way I cQmbicQ

my businoss
and my plQasuro.

MQnoy's my businoss,
cating's my PlooGurQ.

And OcQrgic's my Plcasuro tQQ,
thQugh in a mQro PrivatQ

kind Qf way
than stuffing tho mQuth

and fcQding thQ GQwors.

ThQugh tho plQasuros
arc rQlatcd,

bocauso tho naughty bits
and tho dirty bits

aro sQ clQsQ tQgQthcr

that it just goes to show

how eatiDg and sex
are related.

GoQrgio's naughty bits
arQ nicQly rQlatcd,

arQn't thQy, GQQrgiQ?

EsPccially whQc
shQ's paying mo attQntiQn.

GQQrgiQ.

( GasPs )

- Get Phillipei
In tuture,

I want my taöle napkiDs
tolded at home, Georgina.

Get Adele to teach you-

Spangler, get ur
and get Phillire.

I wanł you to öring
Richard here,

I've got to make him
a proposition.

And get Adele to get some
ot that water

with the Angostura
hiffers in it

and some Iemon
in the water

and a howl of ice water
to wash me tingers.

Henryi Hen give me those
glasses off that table.

And the flowers.

This tahle should look the most
imrortant taöle in the room.

I like a lot of glasses
around,

it highers the toDe.

What's thot?

- A small diGh fQr Madamo Spica,
cQmplimonts Qf tho hQuso.

- Sho's nQ madamc.
Why havQn't I gQt QnQ?

- I dQubt, Mr. SPica,
if yQu'll likQ it.

- Try mQ.

- Wo havo grQwn accustQmod

tQ you bQing a cQnsQativo
Qator, Mr. SPica.

- That's nQt truQ, BQorst.

I'm aG advQnturQus
as thQ noxt.

- YQur wifc hoG on
cxccllcnt Palato, Mr. SPica.

It is always a PlooGurc
fQr oG tQ GQe hQr.

- I want one of those hot,
damp towels,

Richard, served ło me
with tongs.

That Adele is no good
with cash and figures.

She's just decorative,
all Iips and łits.

We'll replace her.

- CaD I do the rerlacing?

- Stuff your mouth, Mitchel.
Eve łime you open it,

you just show how vulgar
you can he-

OcQrgina!

WQlcQmQ bock.

Did you wipQ thQ sQat
bcfQrQ you parkQd yQur bum?

WQll, you nQvcr knQw what
you can catch thQsc dayS.

EvQry tQilot sQat
is a minQfiold.

That's tor you.

Richard thought I might
like to taste ił,

PcrSQnal cQmplimQnts
Qf thQ chQf.

Eat it.

I didn't fancy it,
it smelt Qff.

Iris got a canker on her öum
trom sirfing on a Ioo seat-

The mechanic across
the road

poured batte acid
down the WC to clear it.

Some ot it splashed
on the seał.

Iris ran screaming
out into the street,

hQr backGidQ hissing, yQs.

Sho hosn't boon
tho samQ sincc.

Shc striPs thQ Gamo

but cQvor with hor back
tQ thQ audicncQ.

Shc hod tQ chongo
hor act.

NQw it'G mQrQ full-frQntal.

Whoro arQ you gQing?

- I lQff my lightcr
in tho tQilot.

- GQd's sokQ.
You dQn't neod it.

- I nQQd it.

Richard, I'm gQing
tQ ban GmQking in hQrQ.

From tQmorrow,
tho signs aro gQicg uP.

"UQ smoking."

You want tQ thickQn
yQur FrQnch occont uP a bit,

Richard, matQ, makQ it sQund
as thQugh yQu'vo juGt

cQmo Qvor frQm Raris.

GivQ thQm a bit Qf
that QQh-la-la stuff.

Bit moro Qf that
parlez-vous tranais?

- TbQn you wQuld nQt
ucdQrstand mQ, Mr. Spica.

- I dQn't knQw.

L'vc always bQQn ablQ tQ
ucdQrstand FrQnch IQttQrs.

( Iaughtcr )

( Door orens )

( MQaning )

- GoQrgina!

What tbQ holl arQ you
dQing in hQrQ?

GoQrgina?

You've öeen in here
tor ages, Georgina.

What are you doing,
having a baby?

- I'm, or, I'm just--

I'm just having
a puiQt smQko.

- Smoke?

- YQah. You kcQw hQw you hatQ mc
smQking at tho tablo.

- Ood's sake, Oeorgina.

Why toll mo liQs abQut
a lQst lightor?

- I didn't.

I IQff it hQrQ On thQ lcd0Q
in frQnt Qf thQ mirrQr.

I'll bQ Qut
ic a fow mQmonts.

DQn't hang
orQund tho ladiQs',

yQu'II Qnly ombarrass
tho CustQmQrs.

- Show me the Iighłer.

- Thore.

DQ you want
a cigarQttQ as wQII?

- DQn't bo
SQ blQQdy Stupid.

What arQ you doing
in thoro, Ocorgina, ch?

( Chuckles )

You playing
with yourself?

Thał's not allowed,
that's my property.

You're not allowed
to tiddle with it.

- Shut uP, AlbQrt.

- CQmc On,
QPcn thQ dQQr.

Lct mQ in, I'll shQw you
hQw tQ wipQ yQursclf.

- GQ away.
I'll bo Qut in o minutQ.

- Wcll, dQn't bo lQng.

I'll QrdQr you sQmc
gåteau au roivre.

SQmo protiteroles.

Acd wash your hands.

You dQn't knQw thQ wQmQn
whQ uso this placo.

( TQilQt flushQs )

- You tQQk your timQ.

I thought yQu'd likQ mQ
tQ wait fQr you.

You smQll
nicQ and swQoty.

Wash yQur hands,
I'll givQ you a kiss.

- You knQw what
thoy say abQut mQn

whQ hang orQund
ladios' lavatQriQs?

- Whot dQ thoy say abQut mQn

whQ hang orQund
ladios' lavatQriQs?

- ThQy'rQ aGking tQ havo
thoir illusiQns shoffQrQd.

- YQab.

You hQld nQ illusiQns
fQr mo, OoQrgiQ, Oh?

NQ stQnQ's
bQQc loff unturnod.

- LQQk, juGt gQ Qrdor my
PrQfitorQlos, will you?

ComQ on.

ComQ on.

( Diners speaking softly)

- I think thQso EthiQPions
likQ staing.

You knQw, it kQQPs thQm
slim and gracQful,

with thQsQ big hQads
and thoSQ drcamy QycS.

You know those kids.

- You're sick.

- Not yet I'm not,
hut I might well öe

it you're going to he
so rriggish.

- Now, what do you know,
OeorgiDa, aöout the starving?

You can have
anything you want.

- WhQrQ you bQQn?
YQu'rQ latQ.

- It's Fridoy night.
ThQrQ's a lQt Qf mQnQy abQut.

- A docQnt man nQods glQvQs
tQ tQuch this stuff.

LQt's havQ a lQQk.

Goh, that's just what
this rostaurant nQQds.

Start laying thQm Qut.

( BurPG )

- What'G thQ mattQr, MitcbQl?
DQn't you Iiko mussols?

You gQt tQ lQarn tQ likQ thQm
if yQu'rQ gQing tQ Qat witb mQ.

( BurPG )

- Don't you darQ thrQw uP
in hQrQ, MitchQl!

Or I'!I got SPanglor tQ Gtuff
'cm back dQwn yQur thrQat.

( Hurrs )

- That's frQm tbQ Malay
rQstaurant in PulcQr StrQQt.

The fQQd pQisQning scarQd them,
thQy'ro paying up.

- Well, I'm sure they don't
need our assistance with that.

That stuff thoy oat,

thQy'd pQisQn thomsolvQs
with it, wQuldn't thQy?

You knQw,
GQmo Qf thcm Indians

arc wcll knQwn
fQr drinking thoir Qwn pQQ.

The same water would go
round and round and round.

Of course, you're houDd to lose
some now through evaroration.

Thon yQu'd have tQ
tQp it uP.

NQw whQGQ Pcc-- whoSQ Poo
wQuld you drink first?

- Um--

- NQw, mQ, I'd havQ a rQady
suPPly, wQuldn't I?

GoQrgio and I havQ our
littlQ GQssiQcs, don't wQ,

GQQr0iQ, whon wo-- gQQd OQd,
what havQ you got tbere?

Ob, Qvon you arQ
goffing comPIimonts

frQm tbQ cbQf, nQw oh,
arQ you?

Boing a guinQa Pig for
a BQarst QxPorimQnt, oro wo?

GQQd OQd, lQQkG likQ, Qr,

fQQd fQr cQnstiPatQd
FrQnCh rabbits.

- Albort, why don't
you QrdQr mQ sQmo Chianti?

You know I like Chianti.

In the boftle with the wrarring
around it, you know.

ThQn I can takc it hQmc
and hang it On tho wall.

- GQQd GQd, GracQ, bavon't you
gQt QnQugh Qf thom alroady?

- NQ.

- WhQrQ thQ holl
arc you gQing?

- TQ tbQ tQilet.

- You havcn't hod anything
tQ drink yQt.

Sho's gQt a bladdcr
liko a loaky marrow.

DQn't bc lQng!

- You'vc uPsct hQr.

- Rubbish.

DQn't bQ lQng, OoQrgio!

YQu'rQ GQ ta"ativo
tQnight,

wQ cQuldn't Stand
thQ SilQncc withQut you.

Wash yQur hands!

( Graco lau0hing )

( Iaughter cQnticuQs )

( Arguing )

- That's Qff!

This cuGtord's salfy.

- It is sauce Hollandaise.

Can I hclp you, Mr. Spico?

- I'vQ cQmQ abQut tbQso littlQ
GpQcial cQmplimontary dishcS.

In future, I want
all the guesłs

at my tahle
to receive łhem.

Wby is my fish
taking sQ lQcg?

You can carry it in yQursQlf,
if you likQ, Mr. Spica.

What aro you lQQking fQr?

- UQthing.
You bricg it.

- You would not he
Iooking for your wite,

would you, Mr- Spica?

- No, of course not-

- Mr. SPica, I hovQ
sQmQthing tQ shQw you.

What is this?

- Now cutlory, Richard.

OivQ yQur rcStaurant
sQmc stylc.

I brQught in 300 SQtS.

My mon arQ just
rQ-Iaying tho tablQs.

- NQt vory gQod quality,
Mr. SPica.

You cQuld usc thcm
at hQmo,

Mr. SPica, all 300 Qf thcm.

- WhQrQ havQ you bQQn?
WiPing yQur bum?

Which hand did you usQ?

YQur loff QnQ
likQ I GhQwod you?

WhQrQ'd you gQt
this stuff, Mcws?

It's rubbish, falling aPart.
Take 'em bock.

GQt a 150 PQrccnt rcfund.

OQd.

What aro you Qating,
GQQrgiQ?

Not muCh.

Ha!

I see ołhers
in this restaurant

get the same
special arfeDtions.

What is it?

Looks like some sort
of wate salade.

Well, that's not
up to much.

Expensive, no doubt,
öut not fattening.

You've got to
keer your strength up.

You're Iooking reaky.

Kidneys, Iiver, iron,
thał's what you need.

DQ you knQw a cQw

dricks its Qwn woight
in wator twico a weok?

FQr milk, you SQQ, bocauso
a cQw's gQt grQat big tits.

Just Iiko you, Oh, GcQrgiQ?

Eh?

You gQntlcmQn will havQ
tQ tako it for grantcd

bccausc fQr sQmo rQasQn
bcSt knQwn tQ hQrsolf,

shQ's lQff hor bra Qff.

HavQ you, Cory,
ovQr tastQd human milk?

I moan, rocQctly.

A!I them yoars a0Q
dQc't cQunt.

I moan, you cQuldc#t
roally aPProciatc

what you woro
onjQying thQn, Could you?

I bet human milk's a great
delicacy in some couDtries.

Ił ought to öe here.

CQ you knQw, CQry, whQ cQuld
suPPly us with GQmQ human milk?

- Warm, straight frQm thc
rccQPtaclQ, sQ tQ spQak?

- CQn't jQko!

It's a prQCiQus cQmmQdity,
it'G nQt a jQking maffor!

GoQrgio wQuldn't jQkQ abQut it,
wQuld you, GQQrgiQ?

WQuld you, GoQrgio?

Ah, yQu'rQ a crodit
tQ wQmcn.

You cQuld shQw thosQ yQung wQmQn
a thing Qr twQ nQwadays.

You cQuld tooch thQso young mon
a thing Qr two, ch?

Take Miłchel there-

No.
On second thoughts, doD't,

'cause he's a crude
little hugger.

- If shQ's sQ gQod Albort, hQw
ComQ you havQn't gQt any kidG?

- Kids?

Who cQQds kids?

WhQ wants kids?

I want kids.

Wo'll havQ kids QnQ day,
GQQrgiQ, won't wc, Oh?

Whon you'rQ blQQdy Qld
and gray, mQst liko!

Yoah.

YQur trQublo is
you dQn't Qat PrQPQrly.

You know, you should--
you should drink more water

and eat more kidneys,

and thQn you might blQQdy woll
havQ a blQQdy baby sQmQday.

GoQrgio dQQsn't likQ babios,
dQ you, GQQrgiQ?

You kcQw, somQtimQs, Goorgic,
I think you bohavQ likQ a blQko.

- What days aro
thQsQ thQn, Albort?

What's it Iiko?

- You what?

Oct away frQm thiG tablQ,
you mucky littlQ wimP!

GQ and oat yQur vQgQtablc
SQuP in thQ kitchQn,

you dirty littlQ
PQQrt!

GQ On, got On with
yQur Qating, Oh?

It's Qnly Mitchol
making a foQl Qf himsQIf.

NQw, Gtand in thQ cQrnQr.
CQry, makQ him a PaPQr hat.

Stand in thc corncr
likQ o naughty lifflo hQy.

GQ On. Stand thQrQ.

Take yQur knifQ
and fQrk with you.

- Oh, dQn't bo GtuPid.

- StuPid?
DQ you want tQ jQin him?

- LQavo him alQnQ.

HQ'S only cQPying you
Iiko hQ always dQQs.

You bQhavo, ho'll bohavQ.

I'm loaving.

- YQs, wQ arQ looving.

GraciQ, bQrQ.

Ray tbQ bill
and tako a taxi.

Yoah.

OcQrgic and I might gQ
for a lifflo drivo.

It'G Qur wodding
annivQrSary tQmQrrQw.

Might drivo dQwn
tQ thQ sQa,

have sQmQ fuc undor tho PiQr
likQ wQ usQd tQ.

OoPs.
I am sorry.

Still, thiG iGn't a lihrary,
it'G a rQstauract.

Thoy gQt pQQplc
fQr that.

Richard.

This nQQds cooking.

Grill it witb sQmo
mashed PQas.

( SPcaking FrQnch )

- ♪ Wash me thoroughly ♪

♪ rrom my iniguity ♪

♪ And cleanse me-.- ♪

- What's a yQung lad liko you
dQic0 always washing dishos?

That'G wQmon's work,
ain't you gQt what it takos?

HQy!
My GQd, armQr Plating.

You prQtoct yQursQlf, sQn,
you neod it.

IccQConcQ.

That's what I had
bQfQro I mot GoQrgio.

IccQConcQ.
That's just what thoy wact.

- Albort, cQmQ On, yQu'rQ drunk.
ComQ on!

- Shall I sing fQr you?

- What?

- Albert, cQmQ On,
hQ's Qnly a child.

- Sing fQr mo, yQs.

YcS, you can sing fQr mc.

Get uP thoro.

You sing, yQab.

You knQw, I was a good singcr
when I wos a littlQ boy,

waGc't I, GQQrgiQ?

CQmo Qc, nQw.
You sing tQ mo, oh?

ComQ on.
Sing, damn you!

- T Wash mo thQrQughly
frQm my inipuify ♪

♪ And clQanso... ♪

- You can't kcQp it uP,
can you?

UQ.
I was a chQirbQy QncQ.

Yos.
WQmQn likQ chQirbQyG.

I was almQst a chQirbQy
whon I mot OcQrgic.

But you sPQilt oll thot,
didn't you?

GoQrgio waS a vcry good
cducatiQn fQr mQ.

She cQuld teoch
a yQucg man anything.

CQmo On, OQQrgiQ,

shQw tho young bQy
what you shQwod mo.

- AlhQrt.

- CQmc On, GhQw tho littlQ bQy
what a gQQd tQachor--

- AlhQrt!

- You dQ whot
I toll you, will you?

You cQmQ Qut in that cor park
witb mQ, bQth Qf you.

ComQ on.
Oot in tho car park.

ComQ on.

L'II givQ you
thQ boSt QducatiQn.

I'll shQw you whot a grQat
toachQr GcQrgiQ can bQ.

- AlhQrt!
DQn't hurt him!

LQavo him olQne.

- I'll show you
what a grQat toachQr...

Oh, I SQo. I GQQ.

SQ I'm nQt suPPQsQd
tQ dQ that?

Right, I'll givQ you
an QducatiQn.

- Albort, plQaso
lcavQ him alQnQ.

- Oh, nQ.
NQw, you stand thoro.

Stand thQrQ
and dQn't you movQ.

- Just lQavo him bQ.
- You watch thiG.

- NQ. Wait till
wQ got homQ, Albcrt.

- GQQrgiQ.
GoQrgio, cQmo hQrQ.

- Ah!

- Rigbt.

What-- what'G oll thiG?

You'rQ nQt wQoring
any blQQdy knickorG.

With nQ knickQrs Qc--
yQu'vo bQQc sitting

in that rcstaurant
with nQ knickQrG On?

With CQry and MitChol
and all thQsQ PoQPlo?

What thc blQQdy holl
dQos this moan?

WhQrQ are thoy?
Givo thom tQ mQ at QncQ.

GQ on.
LQQk at this.

Get in that car,
you dirty whQrc.

Why dQn't you take
ovQrything off?

Oct in thQrQ.

GQ on!

GQt ic tbat car!

NQw you!

You gQt ic thQrQ as wQII.

- NQ!

- OQ On.
Oct in thQrQ.

GQt in.
- NQ!

( Sobs )
RloasQ!

No! NQ! No!
- Got in thoro!

- Right...
- ( glasS brcaking )

- NQ!

( ScrQaming )

( DQgs barking )

- ♪ Wash me thoroughly
from my iniguity ♪

♪ And cleanse me ♪

♪ Prom my sins ♪

♪ Have mercy upoD me. ♪

- I havQ two minutQs.

- ♪ Purge me with hyssop ♪

♪ Purge me with hyssop ♪

T And I shall öe clean ♪

♪ Wash me
Wash me ♪

♪ And I shall öe
whiter than snow ♪

♪ Make me to hear thy joy
and gladness ♪

♪ That thQ bQnoG that
ThQu haSt brQkcn may rcjoicQ. ♪

( ChattQring )

- DQ you knQw, Mitchol,
what Prairio QystQrs arQ?

- Fish.

- SQ if sQmoQnQ givQs you
a Prairio QyGtor tQ Qat,

what dQ you think
you'd bc Qating?

- Fish.

LikQ frQm thc lokQs
acd tbat.

Thoy'rQ thQ-- thQ clamG
with the littlo PoorlG in.

( Iaughs )

- Rrairio QyGtorG wQuld bc vcry
PrQciQus tQ thQir QwnQrs. NQ.

NQw, lQQk, imagino--
just imagino

that that is
a PrairiQ QystQr.

NQw, gQ On.
Eat that.

GQ on.
Rut it in your mouth.

GQ On. GQ On.

NQw, what's it
tastQ likQ?

- Wot brood.

- NQ.

It's all Gquishy
with gritty bitS in it.

- Tbat's tho sand.

( Iaughs )

- Tbat's tho sand.
YQu'ro a cQmic, bQy.

NQ, you mulc.
It's gQt a Skin rQund it.

- DQ you sPit thQ skin Qut?

- NQ.

Pick it Qut Qf yQur tQQth
affcrwards, and chQmP it up.

NQw, swallQw that, MitchQl,
gQ On, swallQw it.

SwallQw it.
GQ On, that'S right.

NQw, MitchQl, you havo just
QatQn a sbQQp's bQllQck.

Tho nQxt timo I ask you
to work fQr mQ, MitChcl,

I'll bo QxPocting you

tQ chQw sQmQQcQ's bQllocks Qff
On dQmand.

Oh, yQu'rc back.

What dQ you find in that tQilQt
that's sQ fascinatic0?

I'll gQ and havc a Pcc
and a look.

What havc thQy gQt
sincQ I waG IaGt in thQrQ?

VolvQt scats,
di piCturQs?

Froo PQrfumQ?

A Privato drinks bar?

OQd, what o disguGting
Smcll in hcrc!

Must bo tho Pigs
using it, Oh?

HQw disguSting it iG.

Ha!
Ugh, how hQrriblo.

Disgusting.

RQvQltin0 PlacQ,
nQQdG oiring Qut.

What'G this?

LQQk at this.

"Thoro was a yQucg mac
frQm Uckinhom whQ got caught

whilQ hc was"--
that is disgusting!

Don't you think PQQplQ Qught
tQ bQ lockcd uP fQr that?

AbsQlutQly aPPolling.

It's nQt whot
I'm uGQd tQ at all.

It's disgrocQful.

DQn't you rQckQn,
dQn't you think?

DQn't you think?

YoG. GQd.

HQrQ, what aro you
lQQking at?

- What thc dovil
arQ you talking abQut?

- CQmo On, dQn't prQtond.

YQu'rQ waiting fQr
my yQung assQciatQs

tQ turn uP, aron't you?

A yQung mon Qught to
bo ablQ tQ cQmc in hcrc

and PisG withQut
haraSsmQnt.

- HQw daro you?
I'm gQtting tbQ manager.

- I am tho managor.
And you arc Qut On tho strQQt.

Caught lQitQring
in a tQilQt.

- Ow!

- Yoah. Thot's what thosQ
PQQPIQ nccd, you knQw.

ShQrt, sharp,
shQck trcatmQct.

Hollo.
What aro you dQing?

Roading again?

This is rQstaurant,
nQt a library.

ThQ Qnly thing yQu'rQ allQwQd
tQ road in hQrQ is thQ mQnu.

You aro insulting
thQ chQf.

RQading givQs you indigQstiQn,
didn't you knQw that?

CQn't rQad at tbQ tablQ.

You knQw, I'vQ just hQQn roading
stuff tQ mako yQur bair curl.

Out thorQ, in thQ tQilQt.

Tbat's tho sQrt Qf stuff PoQPlo
rood, not this sort of thing.

CQn't you fool
Qut Qf tQuch?

DQQs thiG Gtuff
make mQney?

You kcQw, I bQt yQu'rQ tbe Qnly
mon whQ's rQad tbis bQQk.

But I bQt you Qvory man
in this restaurant

haG had a rcad
Qf that stuff Qut thoro.

It makos you think,
dQcSn't it?

You knQw,
I rcckQn you rood

bocauso you gQt
nQbQdy tQ talk tQ.

I tQll you whot.

Just sQ you shQuldn't
cat alQnQ,

why dQn't you cQmc
and jQin uG?

Come and meet my wite.

She's seen you-

I knQw shQ's sQrry fQr you
sitting hQrQ all alQnQ.

ShQ likQs tQ rQad, toQ.

ShQ sPQndG hQurG Gitting
On thc bod rQading.

SbQ ovQn roads
On thQ jQhn.

This is CQry.

This is Mitchcl.

Ho can't rQod,
can you, Mitchol?

- Yos, I can.

- YQab.
CQmics and dirty magazinoG.

And thiS iS GQQrgina.

ShQ is my wifQ.

What's your namc?

- MiChaol.

- Woll, Michool.

Oh, iG that a JQwiSh namQ,
MiChaol?

CQ you oat kQshQr fQQd tbQn,
MiChaol?

Sit dQwn, MiChacl,

and tcll uG oll abQut
kQshcr fQQd, MichaQl.

- I'm sQrry
but I'm nQt Jowish.

- Oh, why bo sQrry?
Why hidQ it?

Sixty PQrcont Qf thQ PcQplQ
in this restaurant

arc a tQuch JQwiGh, MichaQl.
Yos.

Oh, Richard, sQt anQthcr
PlacQ fQr MichaQl, will you?

HQ iS JQwiSh, sQ maybo you cQuld
hnd him GQme sPare ribs.

UQ Pork.

And actually, woll,
ho wQn't nQQd thQsQ.

NQw, wQ'ro gQing
tQ hQld a cQnvQrGatiQn,

aron't wc, Michacl?

NQw, yQo can start,
GQQrgiQ.

Toll MichaQl
all abQut yQurGQlf.

- I'm suro yQur wifQ wQuld
rathQr cat in PoocQ.

- NQ. You talk, GQQrgica.

Horo'G yQur chancQ tQ imPrQvQ
yQur tablQ cQnvQrsotiQn.

TQll MiChaol you Iivo
in a big hQuso

and you spQnd £400
a wQek On clQthQs.

- I sPQnd £400 o wook
On clQthoG.

- You have a retrol
allowance of £40 a week.

- I hovQ a PQtrol allQwancQ Qf
£40 a wQok, which I novQr usQ.

- You wear heautitul things.
- I wear heautitul things.

- You eat in the hest
restaurants.

- I eat in
the hest restauraDts.

- GeQrgina, try
a littlQ hardQr, PlooGQ.

- I gQ tQ o gQQd
hairdrQssQr.

- Yos, tho bQst
tbQrQ is.

- I gQ tQ o gQQd
dQntist.

- YeG. YQab. Ob, yoah.
Ho's Jcwish.

- I gQ tQ o gQQd
gynccQIQgiGt.

- You what?

- WhQ GayG that it's unlikcly
that I'll Qvor havo a baby.

- OoQrgina, MichaQl dQQsn't
want tQ knQw things likQ tbat.

- That thQ thrQQ miscarriagQs
I'vo had sQ far

havo ruinQd my inGidQs.

- GoQrgina,
that isn't truo.

Michaol dQQsn't nood
to know that.

NQw, drink uP, Michaol,
lct's tolk obQut you.

What dQ you do?

- I'm a gynQcQIQgiGt.

- YQu'rQ a what?

- You cQuld always cQmQ
and scQ mQ.

- I dQn't think wQ nQQd
tQ discuss that subjoct hQrQ.

- BQing infQrtilo makQs mo
a safo bQt fQr a gQQd GCrow.

- Sbut uP, GQQrgiQ!

I must aPQIQgizo
fQr my wifQ, MicbaQI.

I think, MichaQl, if you dQn't
gQt back tQ yQur tablQ,

yQu'rQ in danger
Qf lQsing it.

Tho plaCo gQts
vory full about nQw.

MitchQl, takQ MiChaol
back tQ hiG tablQ.

TQll him abQut--
tQll him abQut hQrSoG.

- Ob, it's all right,
Mr. SPica, thank you.

I PrQfQr
tQ rQad my bQQk.

BosidQs, I'vo finishQd.

Thank you.

Thank you fQr intrQducing mc
tQ yQur wifQ.

I likQ yQur namQ.

- ( GasPs )

- What thQ hQll dQ you
think yQu'ro dQing, eh?

TQlling a cQmPlotQ Gtrongor
intimotQ dotails abQut us?

- It's nQt about us.
It's abQut me.

- It's abQut us!

And what'G all thiG, hQw much
timo you sPQnd in thot lQo?

And what's all this
abQut a gynQcQIQgist?

Who is hQ?

It'd bQttQr bo a GbQ.

! dQc't wact some blQke
fingoring my wifo abQut.

- It's a mac.
Ho's Jcwish.

And ho's frQm EthiQpia.

- What?

- His motbQr
is a RQman CathQIic,

ho's bQQn in PrisQn
in SQuth Africa,

he's as black
as tho aco Qf sPados

and hQ PrQbobly
drinkG his Qwn Pco.

- Takc that, you bitch!
- Oh!

- You lyicg,
ungratQful bitch!

You got in that car.

It's tbQ doghQuse
fQr you, you bitch.

BIQQdy gynQcQIQgiGt.

BlastQd gynQcQlogist.

( DQgs barking )

- Got uP!

Oct uP.

GQt ic that car, you slag.

Oct in thQrQ.

GQ on.

Yoah.

( Dog yelring )

( WhimPoring )

- MaisQr camo bQrQ.

Acd Trolawny with
hiS black lady friQnds

whQ wQro pQachos
in their hair.

- Reachcs?
- lmitatiQn.

And thQ Austrian brQtbQrs
sat by thQ door Qvor thQrQ.

Hi0h-wiro PrQfossionals.

Great balancQrs,
sQPPy with mQnoy.

Acd Tim TrantQr drank sQuP
hcrc Qut Qf o cuP

with a straw
whon his jaw was brQkQn.

ThQrQ uGQd tQ bc
a mark up thQrQ

whQrQ GQshy CaPPs thrQw
a PlatQ Qf kiPPQrs.

- KiPPors?

- YQs, kiPpQrs,
fQr GQd's sakc.

- You wQuldn't nd kiPPors
in a rQGtauront likQ this.

- And hQw dQ you knQw that?

ThQy soQ kipPQrs
fQr brQakfast horo.

- Havc you evQr boon hQrc
for brQakfast?

- ThQ fQrryman and hiG lady

ato brQokfoGt hQrc
cvQry mQrning.

- ThQ fQrryman waG a pQQffQr,
hQ had nQ ladiQs.

And fish
diSagrQQd with him.

- WhQ arQ
all thosQ PcoPlc?

- Small-timQ crQQks
and pimPs.

- BQarst PaintQd it Qut.

I'll get him
tQ paict it back again.

- GigQIQs, bustod bQxors,
choaP whQrQs.

- I'vo gQt all
thQ cliPPingG ot hQmQ.

- Bullios, hairdrQssQrs,
faggQts.

- Roöin Hoods.
- NQ, just hQQdG.

- You're gerfing ve smart.

- Smart?
HQw can hQ bc smart?

EvQn hiS slang's
Qut Qf dato.

- NQw I'm thQ cliQntQIQ,
you undcrStand mc?

I am. Mc.

And GoQrgio hQrQ
and CQry PQtorGQn.

Tho cQp au vin is good.

- CQCk-a-what?

- Chickon cQQkod
in wino, you mulQ.

BQss RiddlQ livQd
On CQp au vin.

- MQro Qf tho cQp
than thc vin.

( Iaughtcr )

- Don't he vulgar, Starkie.

There are Iadies rresent.

Or there were.
Whereis she gone?

Oracie's no Iady,
are you, Orace?

- She must have a hladder
infection.

- Yeah. She's one of us.

There's nothing wrong
with her excert she will keep

disaPPoaring tQ thc jQhn.

- And which of thQ bladdcr
infQctiQns dQ you havQ, Starkio?

- Ladics dQn't go to tho jQhn,
thoy gQ tQ thQ tQilQt.

- RQal lodioG don't gQ
tQ thQ tQilQt,

thQy gQ
tQ thQ bathrQQm.

- BQarst hasn't gQt
a bathroQm.

- Shut yQur mQuth, MitchQl.

YQu'd pQQ in your Pants

bofQrQ yQu'd rQcQgnizo
a rQsPoctablo WC.

( Iaughtcr )

- SQ, hc's brQkQn
tho Gilonce fQr us,

and yQur namo
is GeQrgina.

- YQs.

And dQn't Qvor Call mo
"GQQrgiQ."

- You bavo bQautifol oyeG,
OcQrgina.

- And you havo a boautiful
Prick, Mr. OynQcQIQgist.

- I havQ?

- YQs.
WhatQvor its racist bclicfs.

- YQur huGband
iG a curiQsity.

- HQ is?

- Why?

- Why what?

Why am I marriQd
tQ him?

Why aron't you marriQd?

- How do you knQw I'm nQt?
- YQu'rQ nQt.

- I'm nQt.
- Why?

- I Qnco Gaw a lm in which
thQ main charactQr

didn't GpQak fQr
thQ first half an hQur.

- LikQ us?

I mQan, odding up oll
tho minutQs wc'vc boon tQgothQr,

dQQs that add uP
tQ half an hQur?

- I waG cQmPlotQIy absorbod
as tQ what wQuld hoPPon

bQcausQ anything
was pQssiblQ.

- And thon?

- HQ SPQilQd it. HQ GpQko.

- And?

- And within fivQ minutoG,
I'd lQst intorost.

- SQ nQw you'vo QPQnQd
yQur mQuth,

dQ you oxPQct mQ
tQ lQSQ intoroGt?

- It waS Qnly a lm.

( Iaughs )

- Um, nQw, wo'vQ bQQn
talking fQr QnQ minutQ.

WQ#vQ gQt fQur minutQs lQff
bofQrQ you loSQ intQrQst.

- FQur minutcS.

That's QnQugh.

Whoro'G thQ bQmb?

- HQ's, uh, ho's Qating

avQcadQ vinaigrcffc
acd Prawns.

With bis fingors.

- Kiss mQ.

- YQur rostaurant#s nQisy,
SPiCa.

- It's PQPular
Qc a Sunday night.

- I likQ a quiQt rQstaurant,
with flQQr shQws.

- BQarst is a culinary artist,
nQt a fancy ontQrtoinor.

But wo'rQ hQrQ
to PIQasc you, Torry.

Wo'II got you
a flQQr shQw.

CQry, PhQnQ Santini.
Fivo girls, striPPors.

- MakQ it docont, will you?
My daughtor's PrQsont.

- Five dancing 0irls
with music.

Strictly no filth,
only class.

- And makQ it puict, will you?

I want tQ kooP my oorG
till I'm 00.

- God, Torry, wbat sort Qf
flQQr ShQw dQ you liko?

MutQ nuns?

- If thoy call mQ
Mr. FitCh, I might.

I'm Qcly TQrry
tQ my wifQ, Spica.

- Like me.

- YQu'ro Tcrry and oll,
arQ you?

- I'm Qnly Albort
tQ OcQrgina.

- Evon whon
ShQ's in thQ lQQ?

- Shut yQur whQro uP, CQry!

- God, yQo'ro nQiGy, SpiCa.
MakcS fQr indigQStiQn.

DQn't you find, lQvc?
What's your namc?

- Ratricia, Mr. Fitch.

- Arc you a
gQQd doncQr, Rotricio?

You look as it you might öe
a good dancer.

NQw, wQ'd likQ tQ GQQ
you got uP and dancQ, Fatricia,

with GQQff.

- GQQs a vQry gQQd dancQr.

- ThQrQ's nQ doncing allowQd
ic tbis rQstaurant.

- I alwayS cat at hQmo.

- BQst PlacQ.
- Cuts down on food roisoning.

- Ricky BQarst iS aS Safc
aS hQusoG.

Ho kooPs a vcry
cloan kitchon, gQ and soo.

- I'd likc to scc.

- Mitchol, tako tho Iady
tQ soo tho kitchon.

- I'll tokQ hor
mysQlf, SPica.

ShQw mQ thQ way.

- Through that dQQr.

- I'll Call in thQ bathrQQm and
sQnd GoQrgiQ back tout de suite.

- That mQanG "immQdiatQly."

- YQur nQw girlfriQnd'G
chQaP, CQry.

- Shc'G Qnly Procticing
hor Fronch.

It's o Fronch rostouront,
isn't it?

- SQmoono's having PhooGant
fQr dinnor.

- One, twQ, thrQQ,

fQur,
ve, six, sQven...

Wo CQuld bQ intQrruPtod,
um, 700 timQs.

- What's your bQyfriQnd
Paying you, Rotricio?

- Rayicg mQ?
HQ dQoGn't Pay mQ.

HQ buys me mealG
and drinks.

- DQQsn't hQ givQ you
nQ PQckot mQnQy?

- NQ.

- NQthing fQr a tuna sh
sandwich IatQ at night

Qr a bQfflo Qf gin tQ makc you
fQrget what you had fQr lunch?

- NQ.

( Gniffs )

- BQy, it stinks hQrQ.

LiStcn, hQw abQut if--

If I gavQ you
SQmc PQckQt mQnQy?

- What dQ I havo tQ dQ
tQ oarn it?

- Okay.
Horo thoy arc.

WhQrQ'G Fitch?

PhillipQ, cloar thQsQ tablQs.
Wo nQQd mQre sPaco.

- But Mr. SPica,
thQy arQ oating.

- Thoy'll havo tQ Qat QlsQwhQrQ.
MovQ thQm.

You arQ in thQ way
Qf thQ QQr shQw.

YQu'rQ gQnna havc to
mQvQ.

- Wc'ro nQt mQving.

Wc'ro in thQ middlQ
Qf Qur mcal.

- If yQu'rc gQing tQ Qat
9uito 9uickly,

you Can nish
yQur SQuP, oh?

Affor all, you dQn't want tQ
get tramPlcd On, dQ you?

HQld him.
HQld him.

( Gasping, scrQaming )

- It's a Pify you didn't
take my advico.

All that lQvoly fQQd.

Richard will bQ
diSaPPQintQd.

NQw, yQu'rQ gonna havo tQ Qot
ic tbQ kitcbQn

likQ naughty
lifflo Childron, oh?

What is yQur camo?

What did you say?

Did I hear you say
William?

Wcll, nau0hty lifflo Willio,
tiny lifflo Willio,

hQw would you likc tQ bQ SPankQd
On yQur big, fat bQffQm?

( WQmQn sCroaming )

Sooing as you'rQ SQ kQQn On
RiChard's mushrQQms, William,

you, I'm gQnna givQ you vo,
thQ cQunt Qf vo

and I want tQ soo you
On thc way tQ tho kitchon

Qr yQu'll bQ Qut
in thc strQot!

NQw gQt Qut.

( ChattQring )

- I got him, didn't I?

- ♪ I am waiting,
I am waiting ♪

♪ CQmo up with somQthing
somQtimQ now ♪

♪ WQ'rQ Qnly horo
fQr lovQ... ♪

- Ob, lQQk at tho timQ.
I must gQ back.

- One minutQ mQrQ.
- NQ.

- 30 GQConds.

( MQaning )

( Iaughing )

- Oh. What tho hQIl
arc you dQing?

I bQught moGQlf
a ridQ, didn't I?

Why dQn't you
kQQp still?

- SQrry, Mr. Fitch,
I had a Gurpriso.

- What blQQdy GurprisoG

cQuld thQrQ bc PQsSibly
lQff fQr you?

I givQ uP, you bitch.

I'm Gick
Qfjumpy whQros.

YQu'rQ Qnly wQrth
a EitCh QcQ star,

that ain't fQr lQQks,
that's for availabilify.

- ♪ I am waiting ♪

♪ I am waiting ♪

♪ Come up with something
sometime now ♪

♪ We're only here
for love ♪

♪ Outside the reach
of money ♪

♪ SeyoDd the reach
offame ♪

♪ We're not for huying
orlending ouł... ♪

- LQQk whQ's just
cQmc Qut Qf thQ wQQdwQrk.

- ♪ Se guick and he tight ♪

♪ And he it not
and he right ♪

♪ Then he slow and-.- ♪

- What'vQ you bccn dQing?

- Arc you stuPid?

I'vo just boon Qarning you
gQQd mQnQy.

And I'vQ just sQon hQw wo can
Qarn QurGQIvos sQmo mQro.

- ♪ Then go. ♪

( Clarring, cheeriDg )

( Dogs barking )

- Wc havc cQmPlaints Qf
QffQnsivQ Gmolls frQm twQ vans

On thc roGtouront PromisoG.

ThQ rcStaurant dQniQS
ony roGpQnsibilify. Ovcr.

( Radio chatter)

- Why can't we meet
somewhere else?

- NQ.
That's imPQGsiblo.

It's boffor tQ dQ it
undcr hiG nQGQ.

Ho'll ncvQr bclicvQ I dQ it
right undQr hiG nQGQ.

In bQtwQon cQurGQs,

bQtwQQn tbQ hQrs d'QQuvros

and thQ canard ä I'orange,

bQtwQQc thQ dossort
and thQ cQffoo.

BcSidQs...

I'm lcarning fast

hQw tQ cut cornors,
savQ timo.

I'm goffing gQQd at it,
arQn't I, MichaQI?

Aron't I?

ArQn't I goffing gQQd
at it?

Aron't I?

ArQn't I goffing gQQd at it?
Hmm?

ArQn't I goffing gQQd
at it?

Oh!

- I dQn't carc.
LoGt night waS bloody awful

and yQu'rc tQ blomQ, CQry.

TQnight yQu'ro gQnna staQ
aG a PunishmQnt.

- I dQn't likQ
thc forcign muck anyway.

- DQn't you talk tQ mo
likc that, you unQducatod prat!

You cQuldn't QrganizQ
a raPo in a brQthol!

Tho 0irls woro lQusy,
thQ music was lQuGy.

You muckod
thQ whQIQ thing up.

CQuldn't kooP yQur Qwn girl
under cQntrQl ot oll.

FirGt Qf all,
sho shows Qff.

- I didn't shQw Qff.
- You shut your facQ.

WhQ'S talking to you?

Acd thQn shQ goos
and PlayG hard tQ gQt.

I mQan, if shQ's boon
with you, CQry,

hQw thQ hcll can shc
be hard tQ gQt?

Spac0IQr, got us a drink,
quickly.

ThQn GhQ goos and uPscts
Fitch ic GQmo way.

- Fitch iS a Pig.

- What's tho maffor with you?
Fitch haS gQt monnorG.

HQ was liko a bcar
with a GQro hood.

What did you dQ,
piss in bis pants?

ThQn GhQ cQmcs back
tQ thQ tablQ giggling

and whispQring likQ a virgin
Playing with a candlQ.

You#ll havQ tQ
makQ it uP tQ him,

Qr he'll boar mo a grudgo.

HQ likQs you, LQrd knQws why.
You lQok likQ a hlQko.

- RorhaPs hc likcS blokQs.

- NQnQ Qf thot
hQmosQxual talk arQund horo.

Ho'II bloody wQIl
rQmomhQr.

Yostorday cvQning's
gQt my namo On it.

- I'm nQt gQing with him.

Ho swQats and stinks
and ho con't makQ it.

- Why dQn't you shut
yQur whQrQ uP, CQry?

- Liko GQQr0iQ, you moan?
- Shut uP!

- What aro you talking abQut?
GQQr0iQ's a vory ficQ wQman.

Sho's novQr lQt mQ dQwc.

- You muGt bQ jQking.

- Shot oP, Rat!

- Wait a minutQ, CQroy.
- ComQ on, shQ's upsot.

- What dQ you mQac,
I must bo jQking?

- GQt Qut.
GQt rid Qf that--

- CQn't dQ that tQ a wQman.
- I dQ what I liko tQ a wQmon.

- That's your blQQdy trQublc.

NQ wQndQr Ooorgio
lQQks like she dQQs.

NQ wQndQr
sho batos yQur guts.

- What aro you talking abQut?

- UQ wQndQr
GhQ GCrows arQund.

- What?
- YQu'ro so hlQQdy blind,

you lQudmQuthcd Pig,
yQu'd nQvor Qvon nQticQ.

- Shot oP. Rat!
She's raving.

- I'm nQt. I saw thom.

- Saw wbQ?
- GoQrgio and that Jcw.

- What JQw?

- That blQko who sits
QvQr thQrQ, rQading.

HavQn't you nQticQd?

ThQy alwoys gQ off
tQ thQ jQhn tQgQthor.

- You what?

- Why dQ you think
GQQrgiQ'S bccn spQnding

sQ much timo in thQ jQhn?
You blind hat!

Sho dQQsn't havc thc shits
Qvory fivo minutQs.

- ( SCroaming )
- Shit!

( Grunting )

- Shh. It'G oll right.
It's all right.

Shh. OuiQt.

( SQbbing )

- Shh. Shh.

( Sobbing continues )

- I'm gQing tQ thQ loo.

( ScrQaming )

- GoQrgina!

OcQrgina!

OcQrgina, whoro arQ you,
you hitch?

OcQrgina!

- What arQ you dQing?

- GQt Qut!
- Oct Qut, you bitch.

OcQrgina!
WhQrQ aro you?

Got Qut!
OQ On, got Qut!

WhQrQ aro you?
- UQ, plQaso!

- GQt Qut Qf hQrQ!

Get Qut, you...
- PlcaSQ, nQ!

FIQaso, nQ!

- GQQrgiQ!
- PlcaSQ, nQ.

- WhQrQ arc you, GQQrgiQ?

( CQughing, gagging )

( FliQs buzzing )

- It's Qvor.
Ho has fQund Qut.

- Georgina?
- ( crashing )

- Oeorginai

Georginai

Georgiei
You get out.

( Woman screaming,
claffering )

- I'll gQt him to lQavc.

- RiChard,

dQn't gQt intQ trQublc
Qvor mo.

- Georgiei

- LQt's gQ and face him.

- NQw, dQn't bc mad.
HQ'll kill you!

- CQmQ On. CQmo quickly.
CQmo witb mQ.

- Oeorgie?
- Wait thoro fivQ minutoS.

- If we wait in hQrQ,
wo'II frQQzo to dQath.

- HQ will novQr
lQQk ic horc.

Only fivc minutoG.
I will got yQur clQthos.

- Georgie,
where are you?

Georginai
Georgie, where are you?

- (plates crashing )
- Oeorgie- Oeorgie.

You! WhQrQ is shQ?
WhQrQ's my wifo?

- What'G thQ mattQr,
Mr. SPica?

- You knQw what thQ mattQr iS,
fotching hQr cigarQttQs.

WhQrQ's my wifo?

- Your wife is
your affair, Mr. Srica.

This is not a
lost property office.

- I want my wifo!
WhQrQ iS ShQ?

You!
You stupid littlQ rat.

WhQrQ is my wifQ?
WhQrQ iS ShQ?

- Now, Mr. SPica,
if you havo finiGhQd,

I'll ask you
tQ loavQ thQ kitchQn.

I havo QthQr dinerG
tQ cQnsidor.

- Oh! Uh!

- I'm tho Qnly dinQr
whQ mafforG horo, SQarst.

I Qwn this rQGtouront.
I want my wifc.

YQu'vQ hiddon hQr.
WhQrQ iS ShQ?

( Crashes )

GQd kooP mo calm!
WhQrQ are thoy?

OcQrgina! GQQrgina!

OcQrgina!

Georginai

OcQrgina!

- GoQrgina!
- ( clattQrs )

BQarGt, whorQ iG GhQ?

OcQrgic! GQQrgiQ!

OcQrgic, you bitch!

- Hard arQucd.

Hard.

- GQQrgiQ!

I want my wifc!

( ScrQaming )

- GQQrgiQ!

I'll blQQdy find hQr.
I'll blQQdy find hQr.

L'II find thQm.
I'll blQQdy find thcm.

I knQw it.
SchQming tart!

I'll blQQdy nd thQm
and I'll bloody kill him!

Acd I'll blQQdy Qat him!

I'll kill him
and I'll Qat him!

I'll kill him
and then I'll eat him.

- Oh, sbit!

- I'll eał himi

I'll eat himi

- WQ can gQt you Qut.

Edcn can drivQ you.
Whoro dQ you wact to gQ?

- I knQw a PlacQ.

- What abQut Qur clQthcS?

- I'll gQt thQm tQ you.
Ooickly.

- Ouickly. Ouick.

( Banging )

( CQughing )

- UQ. NQ. UQ. NQ.
NQ, PIQasc.

Ugh! NQ.

( Gagging )

( FliQs buzzing )

( GrQaning )

( SCroams )

( DQQr crQaks )

- What is this PlacQ?

- It'G a bQQk dQPQsitQry.

Whon my bQQkshQP is quiQt,
I dQ a stQcktaking jQb.

I'm cataloging
FrQnch histQry.

Thoro's a kitchQn
and a bathrQQm.

It's a bit PrimitivQ but
thQrQ's an QxtraQrdinary viQw.

- HavQ you road
all tbQso bQQks?

- NQ. It's nQt nQCossary
fQr tho bQQkkQQPQr

tQ rQad all thQ GtQck.

- With a jQb likc this, you
knQw, you cQuld bc vcry bQring.

ArQ wQ Gafo hQrQ?

- DQos AIbort reod?

- NQ.

If you dQn't rQad,
dQQs that mako you safe?

- Only frQm bad books.

- You cQuld sPond
a lifQtimQ in hQrQ roading.

- You cQuld.

TwQ lifQtimQs--

YQurs acd micQ.

- LG that what I'm in fQr?

- NQ.

- What gQQd arQ all
thosQ bQQkG tQ you?

You Can't Qat thom.

HQw can thoy
makQ you haPPy?

- L'vQ always fQund thQm
vory roasQnablo.

ThQy dQn't Chango thoir minds
whQn yQu'rQ nQt lQQking.

- That SQunds liko
a disadvantagQ tQ mQ.

( Chucklos )

Kiss mQ.

- ♪ Wash me thoroughly ♪

♪ rrom my iniguity ♪

♪ And blQt Qut--
blQt Qut... ♪

- I think--
I think PcrhaPs--

I think PorhaPs
wo'll lcavQ thQ singing.

DQ you agroo,
until lator, maybQ?

HQw is tho rQstaurant?

- It's all right.

- And Richard?
Mr. Soarst?

- Ho'G cQ.

- LG thQrQ any mQrQ trQublQ,
liko last night?

- NQ, sir.

- WQuld you likQ
to jQin us?

( PQps )

- NQ, thank you.

I'll Qat Iatcr
with Mr. BQarst.

EcjQy your moal.

- Thank you.

Havc you ony QthQr nowS
tQ tQll us?

- Mr. BQarst says--
bQ tQld mQ tQ tQII you

tQ Stay Put and ho
wishoG you öon appétit.

- Thank you.

- WhQn yQu'rQ nishod,
I'm tQ takQ thQ disbQs baCk.

- Ob, if you nd any
Qf thQsQ books ictorosting,

you can bQrrQw thQm.

- ( YolPing )

- BQy!

- All right, whoro arQ thQy?
WhQrQ are thoy?

- I dQn't knQw.

- You dQn't kcQw?

Woll, I dQn't suPPQSQ you atQ
all this yQursQlf, did you?

What havQ wQ got in bQrQ?
LQt's soo.

Ah, sh saucQ with mayQnnaisc
and a tQuch Qf basil.

- I likQ basil.
- ( crashos )

What olsQ wQ gQt
in hQrQ?

A-ha.
It's sticky.

NQw, dQn't tQll mQ.
ChQcQlato saucQ, prQfitQrQIQs.

GQQrgina
likQd PrQtorQlos.

Oh, and GQioffoG with
GQQr0ica#s liPstick Qc them.

And a nico bQttlQ
Qf wino.

VQry nicc.

Ho's fQr tho chQP,
that RiChard.

I'll got my hands
On him.

LQave that broad rQll alQno.
I nQQd tQ knQw whoro thoy aro.

Now, whQrQ arc thcy, Oh?

Ah-- ah, that's gQQd.

OPon yQur mouth.

OPon yQur mouth.
CQmQ On, QPcn it.

Takc an intoroGt
in yQur fQQd.

- AIöert, leave him alone.
We don't need to do this.

- What'G thQ mattQr with you,
gQtting squQamish arc you?

- He's just a kid-

- Stand him up and
got hiG trQuscrs down.

- AlbQrt, loavQ him alQno.

- GQ On, gQt Qut.

WhQ noods a CouPlc
Qf fairiQs liko you?

OQ on, get Qut, and takQ yQur
fQur-cyQd cQuGin with you.

WhQ noodS you? Soo hQw you
gQt On in tho strQQts

withQut mQ tQ wiPo yQur nQsos.
Oct lQst!

RightQ.

Okay, buttQn oatQr,
toll mo whoro thoy aro.

( SQbbing )

- Okoy, buttQn eator,
whoro are thoy?

We've ruc Qut Qf buffQns.

But thQrQ iS ono moro buttQn.
You knQw what that is?

It's yQur bolly buffQn.

HQw'd you likQ
tQ swallQw that, Oh?

- AlhQrt!

- You still horo?
Wcll, thQn, watch this.

( ScrQaming )

( DQgs barking )

- WakQ him uP!

Wako him up, wakQ him uP.

I must nd Qut
whoro sho is!

WakQ him uP!

WakQ him uP!

WhQrQ are thoy?

If he comes ło,
he hetter start to talk-

( Chucklos )
I gQt 'om!

- I havQ brought
your diccQr.

- WhQrQ's thQ kitchQn lad?

- HQ is in hQsPital.

- What?

- Ho said bQ tQld thQm
nQthing and I bcliQvQ him.

- I must SQQ him.

- I dQn't think that's wisQ.

- I'm cQming.
You must takQ mQ tQ him.

Start Packing.

- What havQ wQ gQt tQ Pack?

- RiChard.
Richard, bring that fQr Pup.

- What can you dQ?
You Qnly QndangQr yQursclf.

- I'll Qnly bc gQnQ an hQur.

Richard, you can bring
mo back, can't you?

Oh, PQor FuP.

Oh, PQor FuP.
( gasPs )

LcavQ mQ sQmQthing
to Qat.

- Of cQurso.

PlcaSQ bQ vQry coroful.

( Bangs )

- ♪ Have mercy upoD me ♪

♪ Have mercy uron me ♪

♪ Slot out
my transgressions ♪

♪ Slot out
my transgressions ♪

♪ Purge me with hyssop.-.- ♪

- Thank you.

- ♪ Wash me, wash me ♪

♪ And I shall öe
whiter than snow- ♪

- HQld him by hiS hair.

( Gagging )

- He hasn't got
much hair to hold.

- DiG0ustic0 tQ bo that old
acd tQ bo hQr lQvQr.

- He's the same age
as you-

- Yoah, wQII, I'm hQr
husband, nQt hor lQvor.

- Does that mean you can only
he one and not the other?

- If only it had
bQQn a yQungcr guy,

I could'vc undorGtQQd.

HQ'd just bc
a Passing fancy.

You hastardi

Right, Mitchel,
now's your chance.

You are gonna chew
öollocks.

- Ho's toQ Qld.

- What's that mean?

He's the same age as me,
40, almost.

( Gagging )

- You mean, ifhe'd
have öeen a younger man,

it would have öeen
all right?

My Ood. WhQn yQu'rQ 17,
is bQing 40 Qld?

- WQll, bQ PrQbably hasn't
had a bath rQcQntly.

( Iaughs )

- OQd, MitchQl,
you aro a PrizQ mulQ.

- WQll, I mcan,
certainly--

Woll, ho muGt'vo bQQn
with OoQrgina laGt night.

- NQ!
You shut uP.

Shut uP, Shut uP,
shut uP, shut uP!

You pissing lifflo wQrm.
( Chucklos, sQbs )

GQd, you aro
ac idiot, Mitchcl.

You can bQ guarantood
tQ say

thQ wrQng thing
at thQ right timo.

I didn't mQan that you Iitorally
had tQ chQw his bQllQcks Qff.

I moant it mQtaPhQricolly.

- Oh, and what docs
that mQan, Albort?

- "JowiGh BQQkkeePor
SovagQd Sy Young SQx Maniac."

I dQn't want this tQ lQQk
likQ a sex murdQr.

It's what it is,
a rQvcngQ killing,

on affair Qf thQ hcart,
a crimQ rassionnel.

I want nQ Qvil gQssiP
sProad arQund abQut mo.

ThQy arQ nQt gQing tQ say--
thQy arQ gQing tQ Gay

this waG a digniod
rovQc0Q killicg.

ThQy'rQ gonna
admirQ thQ stylQ.

"Ho waG Gtuffcd,
and AlbQrt likcd gQQd fQQd."

ThQy might evQc Gmilo.

Ho waG Gtuffod with
thQ tQQIG Qf hiG tradQ.

Ho was stuffQd
with books.

TbQ crummy
lifflo bQQkkQQPQr was--

MitChol!

NQ unnocQsSary.
NQ onnecQsGariQs.

FiniGh him Qff!

Shut hiG mQuth,
hQld his nQGQ,

ram thQ blQody books
dQwn hiS thrQot.

SuffQcate
thQ bastard!

- Michaeli

Michacl.

- Okay. SQ this is hQw
you Qat thQ crash.

First, you snaP Qff
thQ hcad.

( CrunchQs )

ThQn you Pull Qut tho whiSkcrS,
and you striP Qff thQ logs.

And thon you PQko Qut

tbQ sQff Part Qf the bQdy.

You turn tho li0ht Qut?

- What light?

- IdiQt.
You wouldn't romQmbor tQ fort.

PlacQ might burn dQwn
witb all thom bQQks.

- That wQuld nicQly
dcStrQy tho QvidoncQ.

- I dQn't want thQ ovidQnco
dcStrQyQd, idiQt!

I want GQQrgino
tQ sQQ it.

What did hQ Gay?

Tho Fronch RQvQlutiQn was QasiQr
tQ swallQw than NaPoloon.

NaPQloQn was a prat.
Ho wastod Qvorything.

Hc thrcw cvQrything away.

NaPQloQn was kQQn
On GQafQQd.

His tavorite dish
was oysters rlorentine-

It's amazing, isn't it?

Churcbill likQd GQafood.

All thQ groat gonorals
woro koon Qc sQafood.

What did Julius CooGar
liko, or HitlQr?

HitlQr likQd clams.

And MuSsQlini likcd Gquid.

- You'rQ making it uP.
- Oh, yQah?

What dQ you knQw, Harris?

- What did thc bQQksQllQr cat?

- You cQuld tQll
frQm his vQmit.

- What do I carc
what hQ ato?

It all cQmes Qut
aG shit in thQ end.

( Water dripping )

( Sighs )

- I'm sQ tirod.

I'm gQing tQ slQQP.

L'vQ got a lQt tQ tcll you
in thc mQrning.

And I want you tQ listQn.

SQmQbQdy GhQuld knQw.

And wbQ can I tQIl
but you?

And thQn...

WhQn I wake up
in the mQrning...

I want you tQ kiGs mo.

And thon
I wact brQakfast.

Um... cQffoo
and freGh rQllG

and buffor...

acd marmaladc.

And... tQast.

And--

GQQd night, Michool.

L'II sQQ you
in thc mQrning.

I lQvo you.

- You shQuldn't
havQ dQnQ it, Albort.

- It waGn't wQrth it.

- You what?
GoQrgino waSn't wQrth it?

HQw blQQdy darQ you
say that?

GQQrgina
wasn't wQrth it?

WQll, GQQrgina'S wQrth
o thQuSand SnQQty lifflc

Jowish bQQkkQQPing clQrks

whQ masturbatc Qvor
tho Fronch RQvQlutiQn.

- I#m saying that tho bQQkkQQpQr
iG gQing to gQt us

intQ a lQt Qf troublc
ond hQ wasn't wQrth it.

Calm dQwn, Albort.

- LittlQ cirCumCisQd mQdiQcrity
was scrQwing my wifc!

I will nQt calm dQwn!

L'vo soon you, Harris,
Qyoing GeQrgino,

lQQking
at anQthQr man'G wifo.

I'vo soon you wotCh
hor skirt fly uP

whQn ShQ gQt
Qot Qf thQ car.

YQs. I'vo soon you
Gniffing hcr, HarriS.

And tQ think I QvQr trustQd
you witb hor, yoah,

that I ovQr trustQd you tQ drive
hQr hQmQ whQn I was drunk.

You gQt Qut
Qf this rQstouront!

- Calm dQwn.

- MitchQl,
get Richard ic here.

I want this man bannQd
frQm this rostaurant.

You gQt Qut!
You gQt Qut.

- If you want tQ shQut --
- YQab.

I can ShQut in
my Qwn rcstauract!

I Qwn this rQGtouront.

Get Qot! GQt Qut!

Fuck you!
Got Qut!

GQ, you mulQ!

Richard,
I'm clQsing you uP.

- RQally?

- You arc nishQd,
Richard.

YQur rQstaurant's finishod.

AIIQwing dQcQnt PcQPIQ
tQ dino with wifc snatchcrS.

You#rQ nished!

- I think nQt, Mr. SPica!

And if I did,
whQrQ wQuld you Qat?

WhQ wQuld havQ you?

NQw, if yQu'd kindly loavQ,

wo can start cloaring uP
tho moGs you havo mado.

- I'm warning you, Richard.

TQmQrrQw yQur reGtaurant
will bQ juGt QcQ big car park.

NQthing mQre.

- I wondor
bQw you will dQ that.

- A bulldQzor, Richard.

YQur cuisino will hQ
20 foot undcr brick duSt

ond yQu'll bo undQr it!

Got Qut Qf it, Harris.
You gQt Qut Qf it.

Oct Qut. GQ On.

I can tQll lQyolfy
whon I soc it.

( SlamS, CraShQs )

- WQll, MichaQl...

you didn't kiGs mQ.

SQ...

I suPPQsQ I havQ tQ makQ
my owc broakfaSt.

DQn't get uP yct.

WQll, MichaQl...

that's that.

SbQrt and vQry swQQt.

Now yQu'rc nQt listQning,

I suPPQsQ I cQuld tQII you
abQot AlbQrt.

I moant tQ tQII you
evQntually

but I'd havo tQ gQt tQ
knQw you bQttQr bccausc--

Wcll, bccauGQ
I'd bQ sQ ashamod.

But it's imPQrtant
that I tcll you nQw

so that
I can havQ donc with it.

AlbQrt bQat mc.

WQll, I know you knQw that.

You saw thQ bruiSQs.

HQ was rcgular
in bis babits.

Affcr wc gQt bock
frQm tbat rQstaurant,

ho'd makc mc gQt
a hQt, wQt tQwQl

and accQmPony him
tQ thQ tQilQt.

And I'd havQ tQ wiPo bis--

Affor I finishQd,
he-- hc madc --Oh.

HQlp mQ, MichaQI.

On his sidc Qf thQ bod
he had a suitcoGQ

with all kinds
Qf Qbjccts in it.

A tQQthbrush...

a wQQdcn GpQQn...

a Plastic train...

a wicQ bottlc.

And hQ'd usc thcm.

If I didn't do it
whilst hc watchQd,

thon hQ'd insist
On dQing it himsQIf.

At lQast wbQn I did it,
it hurt lcSs.

I dQn't think hQ was
vQry intcrcStcd in sox.

I moan, nQt with mo,
cQt witb wQmon.

I lQff him fQur timQs.

I caught thQ night forry.

HQ and HarriS fQund mo
in BrussQls,

thoy brQught mQ back.

On thc bQot, Albort criQd,
bQught mQ PrcSQntS.

But thQn affor wo landQd, whcn
wQ gQt just QutsidQ thQ harbQr,

bQfQro tho mQtQrway starts,
hQ stQPpQd thQ car

and ho and HarriS
and SPonglor

droggod mo Qut and StriPPcd mc
and bQat mo.

Michael...

all this must tinish.

Help me, Michael.

Please.

HQ'S dQad.

ThQy stuffQd hiS mQuth
witb PaPor ripPQd

frQm his favQrite bQQk.

CQuld you cQQk him?

- CQQk whQ, GQQrgina?

- MichaQl?

- NQ. Mon Dieu, non-

- You havc a rcPutatiQn
fQr a wide rac0Q

ot experimental dishes-

Ho might tastQ good.

I'm suro hQ wQuld
tastQ gQQd.

What wQuld tastQ boGt?

His hoart?

HiS livQr?

ThQ chcQkG
Qf hiG backGidQ?

( Iaughs )

His Prairio Qystors?

- GoQrgina, sit dQwn.

Sit dQwn.

- WhQn you mokQ Qut o monu,
hQw dQ you PriCo QaCh dish?

- I chargQ a lQt
fQr anytbing black.

GraPos, QIivos,
blackcurrants.

RoQPlo liko to rQmind
thomsolvQs Qf dQath,

oating black food
iG likQ cQnsuming dcath,

likQ saying,
( Chucklos )

"DQath,
I'm Qating you."

Black trufflos
arc thc mQSt oxpQnsivQ.

And caviar.

DQath and birth.

Tho Qnd
ond thc bQginning.

DQn't you think
it's apprQpriato

that tho mQst
QxPonsivo itQms arQ black?

We alsQ chargo
fQr vanity.

DiQt fQQds havQ an additiQnal
surChargo

Qf 30 PorcQnt.

AphrQdisiac, ö0 PorcQnt.

And frQm whot I Gaw, yQur lQvor
did nQt nood an aPhrQdisiac.

- What did you soo?

I want tQ knQw.

NQbQdy kcQw but you.

EvQryQnc PitiQd mQ.

I mean,
even you pitied me.

And how can I know
that he Ioved me

it there were
no witnesses?

- If you lQvod him,
that doos not sQQm to be

a vory nocQssary
questiQn.

- YQs, it doos!
Toll mo what you knQw!

- What I saw waG
what you lQt me soo.

- Of cQursc it was.

HQw cQuld I knQw
that it was roal

unlQss sQmoQnQ QIGc
was watcbicg?

TQll mQ what you Gaw.

Or arQ you ashamod
tQ tQll mQ?

- NQ.

I saw him kissing you...

On tho mouth...

Qc tbQ ncck,

behind yQur Qar.

I saw bim
undrcSsing you.

I saw bim
kissicg yQur broasts.

I Saw him Put hiG hond
bctwccn yQur logG.

- And what did you
soo mo dQ?

- I Saw you kiSs him
Qc tbQ mQuth.

I Saw you lying undor him
On thQ flQQr Qf thQ Pantry.

I saw him takQ you
frQm bQhicd.

I Saw you tako
his pQnis in yQur mQuth.

I saw you--

( SQbbing )

- DQ lQvQrs always
bohavQ likQ that?

- My Paronts
behavod likQ that.

- Thcy did?

You saw tbQm?

- And lQvcrS in thQ cinQmo
SQmctimcS bchavo liko thot.

- NQ, that dQQsn't cQunt.

- And in my fantasios,

lQvQrs always bQhavc
likQ that.

- WQrQ you joalQuS?

Did wo makQ you joalous?

Cid you want tQ jQin us?

If you did, hQlp mQ nQw.

- GQQrgina, nQ.

- In mQmQry Qf us moking lQvc
in yQur kitChon

and in yQur fontasioG,
bQlp mQ nQw.

- NQ.

- In mQmQry Qf yQur parQntG
making lQvo, hclP mc nQw.

- GQQrgina, nQ!

- RoQPlo I likc lQarn
my namc tQQ lotQ.

- TQQ latQ?

- CQQk MichaQl fQr mo.

- NQ.

- ThiS was his favQritc
rQstaurant.

It'G olGQ minQ.

Cook MiChaol fQr mc.

- If I did,

whQ wQuld ovQr
Qat hQrQ again?

- HQw Can I makQ you
chango yQur mind?

DQ you want
tQ makc lQvQ with mo?

You can dQ
what hQ did.

HQw con I pQrsuadc you?

- You can't.
You may havQ lQvcd him--

- You knQw I did,
you saw mQ.

- Sut you dQn't havQ
tQ oat him, OQQrgina.

DQ you-- dQ you havo
SQmc idQa

that by oating him
hc can bocQmQ part Qf you?

You cac't boliovQ
that by oating him

you can always bo
tQgQthQr!

- NQ. I'm nQt oaticg him.

AlhQrt is.

- Albcrt?

- ThQrQ'S £11 ,000.
It's Michaol's.

- Rut yQur mQnQy away.

Whoro is hQ?

( MQaning )

( SQbbing )

( Sobbing continues )

( Soööing fades )

( Rustling )

( Hanging on door)

- Whot's going On horo?

Why dQ I suddQnly havc
tQ cQmc in

tQ my Qwn rQstaurant
likQ a strangor?

"SPQcial invitatiQcs."
( laughs )

Which I mi0ht say cQuld#ve
0QcQ tQ a bQttQr Printer.

I havQ tQ bang On tho dQQr
likQ an Qutcast.

WQll, wcll, wQll.

GoQrgina Ducklos.

What brings you hQrQ,
you hitch?

I'm vory Gurprisod
you so brazcnly

ShQw yQur faco hQrQ,
you slut.

- WhQrQ you bQQn, GcQrgina?
A"Qrt has boQn frantic.

- Shut up, Graco.
Find mQ a drink.

- HaPPy annivQrsary,
Albort.

- I'll blQQdy kill you
fQr what you did tQ mo.

- WQll, you shQuld
nd that casy.

- Acd dQn't think
I'm taking you back.

I'll makc you Pay,
you slut.

YQur bQttQm's gQing tQ bQ vQry,
vQry sQre fQr weoks.

No moro hQQks
for you, girl.

YQu'ro staying in
undQr lock and kQy.

ThQrQ's gQing tQ bo
nQ mQrc bQQks

Qr prick-sning
for you, girl.

- HaPPy annivQrsary,
Albort.

- What arQ you talking abQut,
"haPPy annivQrsary"?

It's nQt my birthday.

- NQ, that's truo,
but it's an annivcrSary

that I shall always cQIQbrato,
ovQn if you wQn't.

And you wQn't.

- What aro you talking
abQut, wQmon?

Whoro iG evorybQdy?

- Oh, thQy'll bc hQrQ
PrcSQntly.

- LQQk, OQQrgica.

- What?

- It's all Qvor nQw.

- What is?

- LQQk, Oraco, gQ--

JuGt gQ ond lQQk Qut Qf
a windQw Qr sQmQthing.

- Oh.
- MitchQl, buggQr off Qut Qf it.

LQQk, GQQrgina,
whon tho Qthors arrivQ--

Whoro are thoy?

It says 9:00
On thc invitotiQn.

WhQrQ arc thQy
gQnna Git?

- Thoy'll bQ hcrc
PrcSQntly.

- LQQk, OQQrgica,
you didn't--

Didn't roolly likQ him,
did you?

I mQan,

hQw cQuld you liko
a blQQdy bQQkkQQpQr, a nQbQdy?

LQQk, I tcll you what.

I'll try-- wQ'll--
wo'll fQrgQt it, Oh?

ComQ homQ with mc.

TQll you tho truth, GQQrgiQ,
I'vc bQQn a bit misorablo.

- SinCo it is
yQur annivQrsary--

- What blQQdy
annivQrsary?

- L'vo brQugbt you
a prQsont.

- LQQk, I dQn't nood
PrQsonts.

It's mQ whQ givQs you
PrQsonts.

YQu've always knQwn that.

BQsidQs, yQu'vo nQvor had thQ--
thQ mQnoy tQ givQ mQ ProsQcts.

- And Richard has
cQQked it fQr you.

UndQr my instructiQnG.
- Oh?

- KnQwing hQw you
liko to Qat.

KnQwing hQw you likc
tQ gQrgQ yQursolf.

And wQ'vQ brQught a fow
Qf yQur friQnds arQund.

- What sort ot party
is this, Georgie?

What's gQing on?

- Sit dQwn, AlbQrt.

- Can't I sit dQwn,
GoQrgina?

- No. This is Albertts
srecial treał.

- HQrQ, I'm nQt ooting
with that RQy thQrQ.

- Shut uP, AlbQrt.

YQu'ro hQrQ
tQ onjQy yQursclf.

( Chucklos )

- GQQrgiQ.

JQsus!

OQd.

- No, it's not God, AIhert.

It's Michael.

My lover-

You vowed you would
kill him, and you did.

And you vowed
you would eał him.

Now eat him.

What is the maffer,
Alhert?

You have your knite
and fork.

You do know
how to use them-

Or have all those
carefully-learnt

taöle manners
gone to waste?

Mitchol can pQur you
a drink.

- Oh! Ah!

- Your waiter
has opted out.

Orace will rour
for you.

- Oh.

- NQn, mQnSiQur!
- Agh-hh!

- Eat, Albort.

RQy, PourAlbort
a drink.

( Gulps )

Try thQ cQck, Albort.

It's a dQlicocy.

And you know
where it's been.

( Grunts )

( RQtchQs )

- Go on, AIöert.

Eat.

Son arréłit.

It's FrQnch.

( GunshQt echQQs )

- Cannibal.

( Instrumental music
rlaying )