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In the draft of his majority opinion
overturning Roe v. Wade,
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00:00:04,842 --> 00:00:08,242
Justice Samuel Alito explains that no
women has a right to an abortion,
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an that in fact
abortion is a crime.
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00:00:10,482 --> 00:00:14,162
To prove it, he cites a treatise from
13th Century England.
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About the quickening of the fetus.
And a second treatise that says
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'If the quick child dieth in her body
it would be a great misprison
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We go now to that profound moment of
moral clarity, almost 1000 years ago,
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which laid such a clear foundation for
what our laws should be in 2022.
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What is the matter?
You look as lost in thought.
10
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It's nothing, just, whilst I was cleaning
the hole in the side of the castle
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00:00:49,603 --> 00:00:54,003
where we poop and it falls into a sky into
a moat full of human feces,
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00:00:54,082 --> 00:00:56,082
I started to think about abortion.
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Oh, really?
What about it?
14
00:00:59,043 --> 00:01:02,043
Well, do you think we ought
to make a law against it?
15
00:01:02,482 --> 00:01:05,402
You mean like the law we have
against pointy shoes?
16
00:01:06,243 --> 00:01:10,122
Or the law that if you hunt a deer in the
royal forest, they cut off your genitals?
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00:01:10,202 --> 00:01:13,803
Exactly. Something fair and reasonable
like those laws.
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00:01:14,683 --> 00:01:16,803
We should make a law that will
stand the test of time
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so that hundreds and hundreds of years
from now they'll look back and say,
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no need to update this at all, they nailed
it back in 1235.
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I don't know, maybe we
shouldn't ban abortion in all of England.
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00:01:29,282 --> 00:01:31,883
We could decide it on an feifdom
by feifdom basis.
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00:01:31,963 --> 00:01:33,002
Oh, good idea.
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00:01:33,083 --> 00:01:38,523
That way if your concubine needs one, you
can send her to get it in old York City.
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00:01:40,083 --> 00:01:43,163
If we outlaw abortion, how
would we punish the mother?
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00:01:43,562 --> 00:01:46,243
Because she'll need to be punished.
She'll be so happy about her crime.
27
00:01:47,043 --> 00:01:49,443
We could always put her on a boat
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and let her sail off the cliff at the edge
of the world.
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She would of course, tumble
down where the four giant turtles
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are holding up the earth and perhaps one
of them will eat her.
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00:01:58,883 --> 00:02:02,043
-Yeah, kinda played out, though.
- Uh, I know!
32
00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:05,842
What if we get a dinkey drunk and we'll
dress it up in her husbad's clothes.
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00:02:05,922 --> 00:02:09,603
Then the next morning she's like 'Uh, did
I just had sex with a donkey?'
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00:02:09,682 --> 00:02:12,082
And the whole town is waiting outside like
'Ya burnt!'
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00:02:13,962 --> 00:02:18,283
Maybe. Maybe. But
what if the donkey gets her pregnant?
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00:02:18,362 --> 00:02:23,043
And then we'd legally have to protect the
fetus and if the half-donkey is man,
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- he could become a king.
- The prophecy!
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00:02:28,283 --> 00:02:29,403
Let's be careful.
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00:02:29,482 --> 00:02:32,362
The worst thing that could happen is if
someone leaks
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00:02:32,443 --> 00:02:35,082
the conversation to the town
cryer.
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00:02:35,163 --> 00:02:37,682
Knock knock!
Just kidding. We don't have doors.
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00:02:37,762 --> 00:02:42,962
Anyhoo, I was outside watching the sheriff
throw left-handed children into the river,
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00:02:43,043 --> 00:02:46,762
and I could'n help but overhear you
talking about the new law?
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00:02:47,642 --> 00:02:51,682
Oh-oh, woman hear ideas and
make her think, why I don't have those?
45
00:02:52,883 --> 00:02:56,962
Yeah, something like that.
So I have a couple questions.
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00:02:57,043 --> 00:02:59,723
Careful, Margaret, don't make
us make another hole in your skull
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00:02:59,802 --> 00:03:01,163
so your brain can breathe.
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00:03:02,163 --> 00:03:03,403
Right.
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00:03:03,482 --> 00:03:08,043
I was just wondering since I'm
almost at the childbearing age of 12,
50
00:03:08,123 --> 00:03:10,843
should women have a right to choose
51
00:03:10,922 --> 00:03:14,522
since having a baby offers
a 50% chance of dying?
52
00:03:14,603 --> 00:03:17,003
Yes, but that's why we're also offering
maternity leave.
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00:03:17,082 --> 00:03:20,563
When you're done with 20 years
of continuous maternity, you can leave.
54
00:03:21,642 --> 00:03:25,003
Shouldn't we make exceptions
in case of rape or incest?
55
00:03:25,082 --> 00:03:27,242
But those are the only kinds
of sex.
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00:03:28,522 --> 00:03:34,323
Yeah, I guess I just don't understand why
you're so obsessed with this issue.
57
00:03:34,403 --> 00:03:37,883
What about the fact that no one
can read and write?
58
00:03:37,962 --> 00:03:39,403
And everyone's diying in a
plague?
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00:03:40,202 --> 00:03:45,802
You think just because I have active
plague that means I need to wear a mask?
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00:03:46,202 --> 00:03:48,283
It's my body, my choice.
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00:03:49,603 --> 00:03:52,802
Well, it's clear to me that we've reached
the limits of human knowledge.
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00:03:52,883 --> 00:03:54,642
We've found the haircut.
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00:03:56,962 --> 00:03:59,003
We know that the sun is the moon
when it's happy.
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00:03:59,482 --> 00:04:04,082
And we trust the Catholic Church with all
our money and our children.
65
00:04:05,123 --> 00:04:07,482
Plus we have birth control now.
66
00:04:07,563 --> 00:04:10,723
You can't get pregnant as lons as when a
man ejaculates
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00:04:10,802 --> 00:04:12,082
he whispers 'Just kidding'.
68
00:04:13,482 --> 00:04:17,643
Well, there's always Plan B.
Letting 1000 bees sting you.
69
00:04:18,523 --> 00:04:22,963
Now, let's all vote. Men, who think we
should outlaw abortion forever?
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00:04:23,562 --> 00:04:24,643
- Say aye.
- Aye!
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00:04:24,723 --> 00:04:27,163
- And those opposed?
- Nay.
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00:04:27,603 --> 00:04:31,843
I'm just playing, I know I can't vote,
but you know, Moors gonna be Moors.
73
00:04:34,802 --> 00:04:37,682
You ever get the feeling this
is not going to be your century?
74
00:04:37,763 --> 00:04:39,043
Enough!
75
00:04:44,083 --> 00:04:46,442
My God, an ogre!
76
00:04:47,242 --> 00:04:49,482
No, just a woman in her 30s.
77
00:04:51,083 --> 00:04:55,682
I did did a weird mushroom in a a pail of
codungs so I can see the future.
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00:04:55,763 --> 00:05:00,802
And whether or not, dear girl,
these barbaric rules will be overturned
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00:05:00,882 --> 00:05:03,482
by something called progress.
80
00:05:03,562 --> 00:05:07,002
And then about 50 years after
the progress,
81
00:05:07,083 --> 00:05:10,002
they'll be like 'Maybe we should
undo the progress'.
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00:05:10,083 --> 00:05:13,802
I don't know why my visions from
that time are confusing.
83
00:05:13,882 --> 00:05:17,562
It seems like all of them come from a hole
from a place called Florida.
84
00:05:18,963 --> 00:05:23,362
And if you think our customs are weird,
you should watch the trials
85
00:05:23,442 --> 00:05:25,442
of Johnny Depp and Amber Heard.
86
00:05:27,203 --> 00:05:31,802
I know it doesn't sound great, but I
guess, but no matter how many choices
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00:05:31,882 --> 00:05:37,682
they take away from women, we've
always got the choice to keep fightin'!
88
00:05:41,682 --> 00:05:45,963
That's really inspiring. After hearing
your perspective, I've suddenly realized,
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00:05:46,482 --> 00:05:48,523
you're a witch, and we're going to set
you on fire.
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00:05:48,603 --> 00:05:50,362
Alright.
It wouldn't be the first time.
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00:05:50,442 --> 00:05:54,643
And live, from New York,
it's Saturday Night!
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00:07:54,163 --> 00:07:57,322
Musical guest arcade fire!
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00:07:58,922 --> 00:08:02,682
And your host,
Benedict Cumberbatch!
94
00:08:06,203 --> 00:08:10,362
Ladies and gentlemen,
Benedict Cumberbatch!
95
00:08:29,643 --> 00:08:31,922
Thank you.
Thank you, thank you so much.
96
00:08:32,002 --> 00:08:35,763
I really am thrilled to be back
hosting "Saturday Night Live."
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00:08:35,842 --> 00:08:39,962
It's been a really fun, great week.
I have to be honest,
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00:08:40,043 --> 00:08:43,363
because most of the sketch writers this
week they pitched me
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00:08:43,442 --> 00:08:46,922
sketches everyday and
most were about Dr. Strange.
100
00:08:50,922 --> 00:08:54,802
I like the guy, I love playing the
character,, thefilm is doing really well.
101
00:08:54,883 --> 00:09:01,202
But I have been in other films,
and no one said to me, like what?
102
00:09:02,802 --> 00:09:05,643
And I said, well, "The Power of the Dog",
for example.
103
00:09:05,722 --> 00:09:10,003
And he said, "Nobody saw it."
104
00:09:11,523 --> 00:09:14,163
I said come on, man, I was
nominated for an Oscar for that.
105
00:09:16,403 --> 00:09:20,883
I mean, I didn't win.
I was beat by Will Smith.
106
00:09:24,003 --> 00:09:26,483
No, not physically.
Not physically.
107
00:09:30,643 --> 00:09:35,602
But I'm really honored to be hosting the
Mother's Day SNL show.
108
00:09:37,483 --> 00:09:41,842
And of course I want to wish a very
special happy Mother's Day to my mum.
109
00:09:42,922 --> 00:09:45,322
She's actually on holiday in
Greece at the moment.
110
00:09:45,403 --> 00:09:49,523
And SNL offered to fly her here
first class, and she said no,
111
00:09:49,602 --> 00:09:51,763
I'm on a beach in Greece, are
you insane?
112
00:09:52,962 --> 00:09:54,202
I love you, mum.
113
00:09:55,602 --> 00:09:59,842
When I was younger, we used
these weird funny names we used
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00:09:59,922 --> 00:10:02,483
to call each other, and I called her
Pookie,
115
00:10:03,202 --> 00:10:05,602
and she called me Benedict
Cumberbatch.
116
00:10:07,562 --> 00:10:10,082
And then I went to a boarding
school outside of London,
117
00:10:10,163 --> 00:10:11,722
you may have heard of it,
called Hogwarts.
118
00:10:13,003 --> 00:10:14,562
And while I was there she's write these
amazing letters.
119
00:10:14,643 --> 00:10:18,682
These fantastic missives and they had
beautiful, beautiful drawings
120
00:10:18,763 --> 00:10:20,363
and illustrations on them.
Incredible things.
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00:10:20,442 --> 00:10:23,883
I can't do that for her, obviously, but I
thought I'd use a bit of this monologue
122
00:10:23,962 --> 00:10:27,243
to thank her for all that she's done for
me, so.
123
00:10:30,123 --> 00:10:33,643
Hey, mum, it's me, your son,
little Benedict.
124
00:10:35,322 --> 00:10:37,243
Thank you for always being there
for me.
125
00:10:37,322 --> 00:10:41,523
You know, growing up, every time I had a
problem, you had a solution.
126
00:10:42,243 --> 00:10:45,962
For instance, when I lost my front teeth I
was worried about being teased,
127
00:10:46,403 --> 00:10:50,202
you said it's okay. Just try to smile
without opening your mouth.
128
00:10:52,123 --> 00:10:56,763
Great advice, but it also explains to this
day and in every red carpet photograph
129
00:10:56,842 --> 00:10:58,682
I'm smiling like this.
130
00:11:02,363 --> 00:11:06,643
Seriously, though, mum, thank you, you've
shown me love every step of the way,
131
00:11:06,722 --> 00:11:08,043
I love you, Pookie.
132
00:11:09,722 --> 00:11:14,322
And speaking of mothers, my wife
Sophie is in the audience tonight,
133
00:11:14,403 --> 00:11:17,283
and I'd like to wish
her a happy Mother's Day, too.
134
00:11:19,523 --> 00:11:20,763
Hi, Sophie.
135
00:11:23,962 --> 00:11:28,442
It's me, your husband.
Little Benedict.
136
00:11:30,922 --> 00:11:33,922
I'm seriously in constant, constant
awe of you.
137
00:11:34,003 --> 00:11:37,842
You gave birth to our three beautiful boys
and that alone is a minor miracle,
138
00:11:37,922 --> 00:11:39,243
as any women will tell you.
139
00:11:39,322 --> 00:11:43,962
Meanwhile, according to you, I was off
dressing up as a wizard.
140
00:11:45,202 --> 00:11:47,802
Tehnically is a a sorceror, wizards have
robes, I have a cloak.
141
00:11:47,883 --> 00:11:48,842
It's a thing, don't worry.
142
00:11:50,283 --> 00:11:53,842
But seriously, Sophie, I hope that when
you think about it
143
00:11:53,922 --> 00:11:56,163
you realize that it evens out.
144
00:11:56,243 --> 00:12:00,643
Because if you
think being a mum is hard, try doing this.
145
00:12:03,883 --> 00:12:05,562
Yeah, I just opened a portal,
you're welcome.
146
00:12:06,922 --> 00:12:10,922
But, really, seriously, Happy Mother's Day
to all the mothers, all the grandmothers,
147
00:12:11,003 --> 00:12:15,283
all the caregivers, to everybody
who does an extraodinary job doing that,
148
00:12:15,363 --> 00:12:18,043
especially to the two mother of my life,
my mum and Wanda Ventham
149
00:12:18,123 --> 00:12:19,202
and my wife, Sophie Hunter.
150
00:12:19,682 --> 00:12:22,363
Seeing all that you two have done
for me and our children
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00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:26,562
truly warms my heart and puts a smile on
my face, a smile like this.
152
00:12:28,483 --> 00:12:31,123
We have a great show for you tonight.
Arcade fire is here.
153
00:12:31,202 --> 00:12:33,483
Stick around we'll be back!
154
00:12:41,043 --> 00:12:44,043
Present, present, present, present!
155
00:12:44,123 --> 00:12:48,243
- Come on, just open it.
- Oh, my gosh. What a Mother's day .
156
00:12:48,322 --> 00:12:50,802
- You did too much.
- Well, you deserve it.
157
00:12:50,883 --> 00:12:54,202
- After all, you're our mom.
- Well. I'm your wife.
158
00:12:56,322 --> 00:12:58,682
That's what I meant.
Who wants to go first?
159
00:12:58,763 --> 00:13:00,483
I do, I do.
160
00:13:00,562 --> 00:13:04,243
Oh, you know I love these little
wooden signs.
161
00:13:04,322 --> 00:13:06,363
Let me see.
162
00:13:06,442 --> 00:13:12,962
Okay, "Life doesn't come with a
manual, it comes with a mother."
163
00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:16,442
- Oh, where did you get this?
- We got it at Home Depot.
164
00:13:16,523 --> 00:13:18,643
They sell art there too.
165
00:13:18,722 --> 00:13:23,043
- This one's from me.
- Oh, thank you, John. Okay.
166
00:13:23,123 --> 00:13:26,883
"Mom turned upside down spells 'wow.'"
167
00:13:26,962 --> 00:13:29,483
Turn it upside down, it
actually works.
168
00:13:29,562 --> 00:13:31,363
Oh, no I see.
169
00:13:32,283 --> 00:13:34,562
No, you're right.
These are really great.
170
00:13:35,163 --> 00:13:37,322
Here mom, thought you'd like
this one.
171
00:13:37,403 --> 00:13:39,962
Oh, okay, thank you, sweetie .
172
00:13:40,043 --> 00:13:44,082
Okay. "Dear mom, we sucked your teats
dry,
173
00:13:44,163 --> 00:13:48,722
and now you look weird in a bathing suit.
Happy Mother's day."
174
00:13:49,763 --> 00:13:51,363
- Cute.
- Good one.
175
00:13:52,322 --> 00:13:56,043
I guess I thought that this one would have
a fun rhyme or something.
176
00:13:56,123 --> 00:13:57,082
But thank you.
177
00:13:57,802 --> 00:14:01,163
You, kind of, look like the
woman in the sign.
178
00:14:02,243 --> 00:14:04,682
Yeah, I'm... I don't know about that.
179
00:14:04,763 --> 00:14:08,562
Oh, honey, give her yours.
Here you go, Mrs. M.
180
00:14:08,643 --> 00:14:11,363
Just wanted to say thanks for
welcoming me to the family.
181
00:14:11,442 --> 00:14:13,763
Of course, Danny.
Let's see.
182
00:14:14,202 --> 00:14:18,123
Having a mother-in-law is like
having crabs.
183
00:14:19,722 --> 00:14:23,722
What... is there more on the back?
I feel like they didn't finish the joke.
184
00:14:23,802 --> 00:14:26,202
- Well, you're going to like this one.
- Okay.
185
00:14:26,283 --> 00:14:28,562
Well... oh, I like the color,
for sure.
186
00:14:28,643 --> 00:14:31,403
"Were your ears ringing?
I was in therapy."
187
00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:35,043
Well, that one doesn't even say
"Happy Mother's day."
188
00:14:35,842 --> 00:14:39,763
- I picked this one all out by myself.
- It's a big one.
189
00:14:39,842 --> 00:14:45,123
Dear wife, now that the kids are grown, we
don't have sex as much anymore,
190
00:14:45,202 --> 00:14:47,883
but we do sometimes, and that's fun.
191
00:14:48,763 --> 00:14:49,883
What?
192
00:14:50,883 --> 00:14:53,722
This one actually goes
with it.
193
00:14:53,802 --> 00:14:57,202
Don't read into it as me asking
for more sex.
194
00:14:57,283 --> 00:15:00,883
The amount that we are doing is
good for me, Happy Mother's day.
195
00:15:00,962 --> 00:15:05,123
Okay, these are getting
really specific and personal.
196
00:15:05,202 --> 00:15:07,562
Yeah, they're great, right?
197
00:15:07,643 --> 00:15:13,082
- I think you spent too much.
- Oh, no, they're like $1.99.
198
00:15:14,682 --> 00:15:17,163
Okay, I want to read this one.
199
00:15:18,283 --> 00:15:21,802
'Dear mom, if you died and dad
remarried...'
200
00:15:22,763 --> 00:15:24,403
Wait, wait, I'm not finished.
201
00:15:25,442 --> 00:15:29,483
'It would be an adjustment, but I
feel like we would get to a place
202
00:15:29,562 --> 00:15:34,643
where we were able to call the new woman
"mom." Happy Mother's day.'
203
00:15:35,842 --> 00:15:39,123
Okay. Okay.
I don't understand, you know.
204
00:15:39,202 --> 00:15:41,802
Usually these signs say
something like, you know,
205
00:15:41,883 --> 00:15:45,682
"Caution, mom needs wine", or
something like that.
206
00:15:45,763 --> 00:15:48,403
We have ones like that here.
207
00:15:50,043 --> 00:15:52,922
Okay, let's see.
208
00:15:53,003 --> 00:15:59,922
It says 'Oh, look, it's wine o'clock.
I just love watching the sun rise.'
209
00:16:00,003 --> 00:16:03,682
Does that imply I'm getting
drunk at dawn?
210
00:16:04,682 --> 00:16:06,883
- Here's a good one.
- Okay.
211
00:16:07,602 --> 00:16:11,243
I only drink on days that end in "Y",
212
00:16:11,322 --> 00:16:14,363
and during hours that have
numbers in them.
213
00:16:15,003 --> 00:16:16,802
- Here's another.
- Oh, my. Okay.
214
00:16:17,842 --> 00:16:22,243
Okay. 'I'm not drunk, it's just the
wine talking.'
215
00:16:24,403 --> 00:16:29,962
As in 'Oh, my God, a bottle is talking to
me, and it has lips and everything.
216
00:16:30,043 --> 00:16:33,643
Did I get so drunk I did
shrooms.
217
00:16:33,722 --> 00:16:37,403
Oh, yeah, I did.
I'm an effing mess.
218
00:16:37,483 --> 00:16:39,643
I don't drink that much!
219
00:16:39,722 --> 00:16:40,763
Here you go.
220
00:16:41,363 --> 00:16:43,043
'You do.'?
221
00:16:44,163 --> 00:16:48,283
I think Mother's day can be
done now, thank you everyone.
222
00:16:48,363 --> 00:16:50,763
No, mom, we're sorry.
223
00:16:50,842 --> 00:16:54,883
- I guess we got carried away.
- They seemed really clever in the store.
224
00:16:54,962 --> 00:16:57,003
Don't be mad, this is your day.
225
00:16:57,082 --> 00:17:00,722
There is one last one if you want to look.
You probably don't, though.
226
00:17:00,802 --> 00:17:04,003
You know what?
Fine, just give it to me.
227
00:17:05,443 --> 00:17:11,082
'Mom, for all the times we forgot to thank
you for all the special things you do
228
00:17:11,162 --> 00:17:15,842
there's just one thing we need to mention.
You're the best, we love you.'
229
00:17:15,923 --> 00:17:18,483
Okay, well that one is pretty cool.
230
00:17:19,362 --> 00:17:20,562
That part flips down.
231
00:17:22,322 --> 00:17:25,362
Oh, 'We suspect dad has a
secret family.'
232
00:17:26,642 --> 00:17:29,963
- Who wants more pancakes!
- Oh, wait, do you?
233
00:17:30,723 --> 00:17:32,642
I need an answer.
234
00:17:38,443 --> 00:17:41,602
Okay, cutie pies.
We're ready to get started.
235
00:17:41,683 --> 00:17:47,243
Well, maybe a little more flirtatious of
an intro than we need, but it's all good.
236
00:17:47,322 --> 00:17:50,402
Hi, gang. Thanks for coming out to this
focus group.
237
00:17:50,483 --> 00:17:53,483
We are from Blue Bunny Ice Cream
and we've got some new products
238
00:17:53,562 --> 00:17:54,923
that we'd love your
feedback on.
239
00:17:55,483 --> 00:17:59,523
- Like bomb pops?
- No, no sir, no bomb pops today.
240
00:17:59,602 --> 00:18:01,243
I love bomb pops.
241
00:18:01,842 --> 00:18:03,683
Okay, again, no b-pops,
242
00:18:03,763 --> 00:18:10,003
but I do think you'll find our other
treats, the ice cream of the crop.
243
00:18:10,082 --> 00:18:13,763
No offense, but I signed up to try ice
cream, not to hear jokes about it.
244
00:18:13,842 --> 00:18:17,402
- Can we get to the tasting?
- Okay, I'm sorry.
245
00:18:17,483 --> 00:18:20,523
Hey. Those two are just trying to do
their job.
246
00:18:21,003 --> 00:18:24,763
They gotta tell a joke or two, let them.
This is their dance, not yours.
247
00:18:26,122 --> 00:18:29,203
- Do you two know each other?
- No, ma'am.
248
00:18:29,283 --> 00:18:31,963
Just here to try some ice cream,
get my check, and be on my way.
249
00:18:32,043 --> 00:18:35,642
Same here. Came in a stranger,
I'll leave one as well.
250
00:18:37,243 --> 00:18:38,683
Okay, very fun.
251
00:18:40,082 --> 00:18:45,683
The first flavor we're going to try today
is peanut brittle pie ice cream.
252
00:18:45,763 --> 00:18:50,923
So give those a try.
Jacob, how about you go first?
253
00:18:51,802 --> 00:18:54,723
- What do you think?
- Oh, wow, it's delicious.
254
00:18:56,082 --> 00:19:00,882
- Great? What about you, Lisa?
- Tastes a little wet. But yummy.
255
00:19:02,082 --> 00:19:04,483
Noted.
Bobbi, what do you think?
256
00:19:06,003 --> 00:19:07,523
You know what this tastes like?
257
00:19:08,082 --> 00:19:12,162
You remember when you was a kid, you'd
be playing out in all the dirty buckets
258
00:19:12,243 --> 00:19:13,402
like a hog?
259
00:19:14,523 --> 00:19:18,723
And pappy'd call you in to wash up because
Nana spent the last three hours churning?
260
00:19:18,802 --> 00:19:20,683
That woman would churn till she whipped.
261
00:19:22,203 --> 00:19:26,763
The blood from her palms, legs, and the
caramel ribbons in the ice cream.
262
00:19:28,523 --> 00:19:32,562
This is that.
This tastes like that.
263
00:19:33,402 --> 00:19:35,963
Oh, thank you.
Very descriptive.
264
00:19:36,043 --> 00:19:38,483
You're trying to make a grown
weep, miss?
265
00:19:39,122 --> 00:19:41,602
No, I'm just trying to eat
ice cream, sir.
266
00:19:42,443 --> 00:19:47,122
What about you, mutton. What did you think
of the peanut brittle pie?
267
00:19:48,162 --> 00:19:50,003
It's a... how do I say this?
268
00:19:51,362 --> 00:19:53,523
Remember when you'd be down by
the pond all day,
269
00:19:53,602 --> 00:19:58,043
witj your hands cupped trying to catch one
stupid little tadpole?
270
00:19:59,082 --> 00:20:03,322
It would mean nothing today, but back
then, hell, that tad was king crab.
271
00:20:04,483 --> 00:20:07,802
And then Scooter's mama, the one with the
pretty teeth and eyes like butter,
272
00:20:07,882 --> 00:20:10,683
who'd invite you inside for a bowl of
Rocky Road.
273
00:20:11,562 --> 00:20:13,003
Didn't matter the flavor, though.
274
00:20:13,842 --> 00:20:17,802
It was just that a beautiful, mature woman
had opened her door to you.
275
00:20:18,243 --> 00:20:20,362
Farmer's wife.
Bosom heavy.
276
00:20:22,043 --> 00:20:26,243
This is that.
This tastes like that.
277
00:20:27,602 --> 00:20:29,243
Okay.
278
00:20:30,443 --> 00:20:36,723
Tastes like Scooter's mama.
Writing that down.
279
00:20:37,443 --> 00:20:40,322
- You've seen things, haven't you?
- Nah.
280
00:20:41,683 --> 00:20:42,763
Only ice cream, miss.
281
00:20:44,443 --> 00:20:48,243
Hey, man. I just taste ice cream.
Am I doing this wrong?
282
00:20:49,122 --> 00:20:50,122
No.
283
00:20:50,203 --> 00:20:54,963
Guys, we're not really looking to taste
memories of the dust bowl here.
284
00:20:56,723 --> 00:20:59,362
Your ice cream carries a
weight to it, sir.
285
00:20:59,443 --> 00:21:02,003
She's right. I can taste generations of
women in it.
286
00:21:04,003 --> 00:21:06,683
Okay.
I will not be writing that down.
287
00:21:07,723 --> 00:21:10,723
How about this one.
Galactic mint frost.
288
00:21:10,802 --> 00:21:12,882
Why don't you all give that one
a little taste. Yeah?
289
00:21:12,963 --> 00:21:16,562
Yeah. Bobbi, you tasting that fresh
mint in there?
290
00:21:17,122 --> 00:21:20,882
No.
Tastes more like wind.
291
00:21:22,322 --> 00:21:25,523
Like the wind when you haven't
quite reached 5 feet tall.
292
00:21:26,642 --> 00:21:29,043
Wind back then would knock you
right into your neighbor.
293
00:21:29,923 --> 00:21:33,523
The one that had lost his wife and
daughter in the hospital fire.
294
00:21:34,882 --> 00:21:37,082
And in your eyes, he saw them both.
295
00:21:38,043 --> 00:21:42,483
So you'd sit with him on the
porch watching the world go by.
296
00:21:43,763 --> 00:21:47,162
Just as the sun went down, he'd
hand you a bowl of cream.
297
00:21:47,882 --> 00:21:51,082
Just vanilla, though. He kept it simple
since the girls had died.
298
00:21:54,203 --> 00:21:58,842
This is that.
This tastes like that.
299
00:21:59,642 --> 00:22:02,802
Got it.
So it tastes like a widower in pain.
300
00:22:04,243 --> 00:22:05,283
Who hurt you?
301
00:22:05,683 --> 00:22:08,243
Why, you looking to save
someone tonight?
302
00:22:08,322 --> 00:22:10,082
- Maybe.
- Eat your ice cream.
303
00:22:11,723 --> 00:22:13,203
I'm sorry, what is happening?
304
00:22:15,283 --> 00:22:19,723
- You want to know what I taste?
- Yes, but in like six words this time.
305
00:22:19,802 --> 00:22:20,882
Fine.
306
00:22:21,443 --> 00:22:25,203
- Remember the fourth of July...
- Okay, please stop.
307
00:22:25,283 --> 00:22:29,122
The air was so thick with smoke, you could
barely find your little brother's hand.
308
00:22:29,923 --> 00:22:33,802
Daddy let you both stay out late as long
as you kept your little brother close.
309
00:22:34,602 --> 00:22:35,723
Never did find him.
310
00:22:37,602 --> 00:22:41,683
Walked home alone, went straight to the
icebox, scooped out some choc chip,
311
00:22:41,763 --> 00:22:44,483
nothing too fancy on the night your
brother disappeared.
312
00:22:45,763 --> 00:22:49,562
This is that.
This tastes like that.
313
00:22:50,283 --> 00:22:55,763
Dammit, I can't take your pain away but I
can give it a bed to rest in.
314
00:22:57,923 --> 00:23:03,602
- Let me nap with your hurt.
- You want to nap with my hurt?
315
00:23:03,683 --> 00:23:09,443
I said as much.
Let me nap with your hurt!
316
00:23:09,523 --> 00:23:13,562
Don't say something like that, you might
just end up taking a nap with my hurt.
317
00:23:15,562 --> 00:23:19,963
All right! Well, thanks for coming out,
everybody.
318
00:23:20,763 --> 00:23:22,043
Hear me now
319
00:23:23,003 --> 00:23:27,683
I will always come for you.
What took you so long?
320
00:23:29,162 --> 00:23:31,842
Blue Bunny Ice Cream.
Let me nap with your hurt.
321
00:23:39,923 --> 00:23:43,203
Hey, no phone.
You're grounded, remember?
322
00:23:44,162 --> 00:23:47,523
Oh, my God, I didn't even do
anything that bad, mom.
323
00:23:47,602 --> 00:23:50,642
Really?
Taylor, you came home drunk.
324
00:23:50,723 --> 00:23:52,082
You're 17 years old.
325
00:23:52,162 --> 00:23:55,043
Oh, come on, like you never
drank when you were my age?
326
00:23:55,122 --> 00:23:58,602
In high school, no.
Not even a sip. Never.
327
00:23:58,683 --> 00:24:01,723
Chug, chug, chug!
Oh!
328
00:24:08,322 --> 00:24:10,763
Alcohol was not even on my
radar at your age.
329
00:24:13,283 --> 00:24:16,882
Yo, it's not a party until Sloppy Sandy
pukes!
330
00:24:17,763 --> 00:24:19,122
I'm okay!
331
00:24:22,523 --> 00:24:26,003
Well, sorry I'm not just like you, mom.
Sorry I'm not perfect.
332
00:24:26,082 --> 00:24:30,963
I wasn't perfect, Taylor. I made mistakes.
I did things I regret.
333
00:24:33,723 --> 00:24:35,683
I can't believe we're not
virgins anymore.
334
00:24:37,723 --> 00:24:39,683
I did a couple things I regret.
335
00:24:41,923 --> 00:24:45,043
- Can't believe we're not virgins anymore.
- I know, right?
336
00:24:47,523 --> 00:24:50,162
- Name one mistake you made.
- Okay, you know what?
337
00:24:50,243 --> 00:24:55,322
Fine, here's one. I failed a test once.
It was a big test.
338
00:24:55,402 --> 00:24:57,003
I'm sorry!
339
00:24:59,882 --> 00:25:03,082
The point is, I never did
anything so stupid
340
00:25:03,162 --> 00:25:05,122
it followed
me through my whole life.
341
00:25:09,203 --> 00:25:11,882
- Everything all right in here?
- Yeah, grandma, we're fine.
342
00:25:11,963 --> 00:25:14,723
Mom, you want to keep telling me
how much of a dumbass I am?
343
00:25:14,802 --> 00:25:15,963
- What?
- Taylor!
344
00:25:16,043 --> 00:25:17,443
Can you believe the way she
speaks to me?
345
00:25:18,122 --> 00:25:20,763
I would never have spoken to
your grandma by way.
346
00:25:20,842 --> 00:25:24,082
Suck my beef, you old bithch!
347
00:25:25,683 --> 00:25:27,283
Yeah, we always got along
pretty well.
348
00:25:27,362 --> 00:25:32,683
Sandy, if I catch you smoking cigarettes
again, I will shave your head!
349
00:25:34,362 --> 00:25:38,082
Taylor, your mom told me it
got a little wild at a party?
350
00:25:38,162 --> 00:25:40,763
Now, I'm all for having fun, but
call me old-fashioned,
351
00:25:40,842 --> 00:25:44,283
I think there is a certain way that a
young lady ought to behave.
352
00:25:44,362 --> 00:25:48,642
David Bowie! I love you, David!
Take my panties!
353
00:25:48,723 --> 00:25:50,162
David!
354
00:25:51,203 --> 00:25:52,402
I know.
355
00:25:55,763 --> 00:25:57,203
Okay, I'll say it then.
356
00:25:58,723 --> 00:26:01,642
- You told grandma?
- Of course I did, honey.
357
00:26:01,723 --> 00:26:03,842
I'm worried about you.
358
00:26:04,402 --> 00:26:08,283
- What are we worried about?
- Nothing, I'm fine. I went to one party.
359
00:26:08,362 --> 00:26:11,402
Meanwhile, mom's acting like she
never had fun in her life.
360
00:26:12,203 --> 00:26:15,723
Well, when I met your ma in college, she
certainly knew how to have a good time.
361
00:26:15,802 --> 00:26:18,763
- Hey.
- But she always kept it in control.
362
00:26:20,523 --> 00:26:22,723
- How many pills did you take?
- Three.
363
00:26:25,602 --> 00:26:28,322
- What is the problem?
- You blew my roommate.
364
00:26:28,402 --> 00:26:30,162
I thought it was you.
365
00:26:32,402 --> 00:26:35,443
If she's hard on you, it's only 'cause she
loves you so much.
366
00:26:36,723 --> 00:26:39,763
- I know.
- I'm just trying to look out for you.
367
00:26:41,162 --> 00:26:42,802
Come here.
Give me a hug.
368
00:26:44,723 --> 00:26:48,402
You know, you're still grounded.
But you can have your phone back.
369
00:26:48,483 --> 00:26:49,562
Yes!
370
00:26:49,642 --> 00:26:54,203
Text message from Ryan, "parents gone,
come over for eggplant emoji."
371
00:26:54,842 --> 00:26:56,043
Never mind.
372
00:26:57,483 --> 00:27:00,923
No, I know what this means.
Yeah.
373
00:27:16,243 --> 00:27:17,763
Lord, it's hot.
374
00:27:18,243 --> 00:27:21,802
Georgia in July is hotter than a blister
bug in a pepper patch.
375
00:27:21,882 --> 00:27:26,362
- Don't the warden know it.
- All right, boys, back to work now.
376
00:27:27,562 --> 00:27:30,003
These rocks ain't gonna break
themselves.
377
00:27:30,082 --> 00:27:33,723
And get happy, I want to see
some smiles.
378
00:27:38,043 --> 00:27:41,162
I was born on a farm
on a moonless night
379
00:27:41,243 --> 00:27:43,483
Mama never taught me wrong
from right
380
00:27:43,562 --> 00:27:44,882
Now I'm doing time
in Georgia
381
00:27:44,963 --> 00:27:47,802
- Doing time in Georgia
- Long time in Georgia
382
00:27:47,882 --> 00:27:52,283
- Long time in Georgia
- Happy as claims is a good lord set me
383
00:27:52,362 --> 00:27:54,003
Free lord set me free, yeah
384
00:27:54,082 --> 00:27:56,802
Now the good book said
be a righteous man
385
00:27:56,882 --> 00:27:59,283
But the devil pulled me down
and away we ran
386
00:27:59,362 --> 00:28:02,443
- So they locked me up in town
- Locked me up in town
387
00:28:02,523 --> 00:28:04,963
- Working for the county
- Working for the county
388
00:28:05,043 --> 00:28:08,003
I'll be in chains till the good Lord
sets me free
389
00:28:08,082 --> 00:28:09,523
Take it, Tommy!
390
00:28:09,602 --> 00:28:12,802
If I see something bad
you know I'm gonna tell
391
00:28:12,882 --> 00:28:15,443
That's why they put me in a
better prison cell,
392
00:28:15,523 --> 00:28:18,443
- Cause I snitched to the warden
- Snitched to the warden
393
00:28:18,523 --> 00:28:20,923
Snitching to the warden
Snitching to the warden
394
00:28:21,003 --> 00:28:26,043
- Oh Lord, prison's not so bad
- Wait, Tom.
395
00:28:26,122 --> 00:28:28,402
Did you just say you were
snitching to the warden?
396
00:28:28,483 --> 00:28:31,763
Yep, that's the way the old
prison song goes.
397
00:28:32,443 --> 00:28:33,483
Nope!
398
00:28:34,443 --> 00:28:36,402
You getting special
treatment, Tom?
399
00:28:36,483 --> 00:28:38,322
Nah, just singing to pass the
time.
400
00:28:39,683 --> 00:28:40,842
Whoo-wee, it's hot.
401
00:28:45,842 --> 00:28:48,082
Where did you get that fancy
drink?
402
00:28:48,162 --> 00:28:51,602
- You fellas didn't get one?
- I did not.
403
00:28:53,362 --> 00:28:57,322
- What's going on?
- Oh, hell, they caught Lenny!
404
00:28:57,882 --> 00:29:03,602
Well, well, well. Look who we found hiding
in the storm drain down by the highway.
405
00:29:03,683 --> 00:29:07,243
But, it's impossible, how did you
find me?
406
00:29:07,322 --> 00:29:10,562
Let's just say a little
birdie told us your plan.
407
00:29:10,642 --> 00:29:15,322
On an unrelated note, Tom,
here is a cherry pie.
408
00:29:16,523 --> 00:29:17,842
Cherry pie?
409
00:29:18,963 --> 00:29:23,082
And as for you, Lenny? You know what
we do with escapees.
410
00:29:23,162 --> 00:29:26,283
- Put them in the box!
- No, no. Not the box!
411
00:29:26,362 --> 00:29:28,562
You animals!
You lousy animals!
412
00:29:28,642 --> 00:29:30,443
He's a good man, don't put
him in the box!
413
00:29:30,523 --> 00:29:34,402
Or maybe just for a couple of
days, you guys know best.
414
00:29:35,243 --> 00:29:36,923
All right, show's over.
415
00:29:37,003 --> 00:29:41,923
Now unless you got a pie in your
hand, get back to work!
416
00:29:44,243 --> 00:29:47,043
When I dream at night
that's the only time I'm free
417
00:29:47,122 --> 00:29:49,483
I wake up every morning
in a penitentiary
418
00:29:49,562 --> 00:29:52,562
- Now I'm doing ten to 20
- Doing ten to 20
419
00:29:52,642 --> 00:29:55,162
- Working for the county
- Working for the county
420
00:29:55,243 --> 00:29:58,523
I'll be in chains till the good Lord
sets me free
421
00:29:58,602 --> 00:29:59,802
God, set me free
422
00:29:59,882 --> 00:30:03,082
If you tell me your secrets
I'll pass them along
423
00:30:03,162 --> 00:30:05,562
You'll be in the box
while I'm singing this song
424
00:30:05,642 --> 00:30:08,602
- I made a deal with the warden
- Deal with the warden
425
00:30:08,683 --> 00:30:11,243
- I'll tell him all your secrets
- Tell him all your secrets
426
00:30:11,322 --> 00:30:14,683
Every time I snitch they bring me
a big cherry pie
427
00:30:15,802 --> 00:30:17,562
Shh, here comes the warden's
wife!
428
00:30:19,362 --> 00:30:20,963
- Ma'am.
- Ma'am.
429
00:30:21,443 --> 00:30:22,723
- Ma'am.
- Ma'am.
430
00:30:23,763 --> 00:30:28,043
Why, if it isn't my lovely wife, Mary.
What you doing here, woman?
431
00:30:28,122 --> 00:30:30,963
Oh, I was just passing by on
my way into town.
432
00:30:31,043 --> 00:30:35,003
Figured I'd take a gander at all
these bad, bad boys.
433
00:30:35,562 --> 00:30:37,963
This one looks especially
naughty.
434
00:30:38,483 --> 00:30:43,162
- Are you a naughty boy?
- Yes, ma'am. Very naughty, ma'am.
435
00:30:43,243 --> 00:30:47,122
Looks like you missed a bit
of cherry pie.
436
00:30:47,203 --> 00:30:49,162
Oh, thank you kindly.
437
00:30:49,243 --> 00:30:51,443
It's not like me to waste a good
bit of cherry pie.
438
00:30:54,082 --> 00:30:55,283
What the hell?
439
00:30:57,683 --> 00:31:00,763
All right, Mary.
I know you got some shopping to do.
440
00:31:01,642 --> 00:31:04,723
Bye, boys.
See you later.
441
00:31:04,802 --> 00:31:09,082
That's enough yapping for one
day. Back to work, all of you.
442
00:31:11,162 --> 00:31:16,802
No, I can't complain about my life
I get to sleep with the warden's wife
443
00:31:16,882 --> 00:31:19,642
- I'm sleeping with the warden's wife
- Sleeping with the warden's wife
444
00:31:19,723 --> 00:31:22,243
- Sleeping with his pretty wife
- Sleeping with his pretty wife
445
00:31:22,322 --> 00:31:25,723
Watches from the closet
smiling in the dark
446
00:31:28,043 --> 00:31:32,043
Warden, I do believe Tom is
sleeping with your wife.
447
00:31:32,122 --> 00:31:36,162
Yeah, I know. I can't please her myself.
Best to let her be happy.
448
00:31:36,963 --> 00:31:42,683
Way to be happy, way to be happy
Very very happy, very very happy
449
00:31:51,322 --> 00:31:55,122
Ladies and gentlemen, two of my favorite
words, Arcade Fire!
450
00:32:02,602 --> 00:32:03,723
Eddie, I love you.
451
00:36:19,843 --> 00:36:22,323
I love you, mom.
I love you, mom.
452
00:36:31,443 --> 00:36:35,443
It's "Weekend Update" with
Colin Jost and Michael Che.
453
00:36:41,883 --> 00:36:43,363
- Good evening.
- Hello.
454
00:36:45,602 --> 00:36:47,443
- Good evening, everyone.
- Welcome to "Weekend Update."
455
00:36:47,523 --> 00:36:49,443
- I'm Michael Che.
- I'm Colin Jost.
456
00:36:51,122 --> 00:36:55,483
Well, guys, tomorrow is Mother's day.
Whether you wanted to be one or not.
457
00:36:58,682 --> 00:37:02,602
In an unprecedented move that could cause
lasting damage to the Supreme Court,
458
00:37:02,682 --> 00:37:06,963
a draft opinion was leaked which indicates
that they intend to overturn Roe v. Wade.
459
00:37:07,043 --> 00:37:11,043
So the court is usually careful but they
slipped up just this once,
460
00:37:11,122 --> 00:37:15,082
now they've got to live with it forever.
Sounds really unfair.
461
00:37:16,282 --> 00:37:18,722
The opinion was written by
Justice Samuel Alito,
462
00:37:18,803 --> 00:37:21,602
and he bases his argument on laws from
the 1600s.
463
00:37:22,003 --> 00:37:25,122
So it's an outdated opinion from
an angry 70-year-old?
464
00:37:25,202 --> 00:37:28,483
This shouldn't be a supreme court
decision, it should be a Facebook post.
465
00:37:29,963 --> 00:37:33,363
The opinion also seems like it was written
in a weird conservative bubble.
466
00:37:33,443 --> 00:37:35,923
Here's how you know.
He quotes his own colleague,
467
00:37:36,003 --> 00:37:40,043
Brett Kavanaugh six times,
one for each beer in the pack.
468
00:37:41,682 --> 00:37:44,202
He even cites Kavanaugh on civil rights,
469
00:37:44,282 --> 00:37:46,803
which is like citing Amber Heard on how to
make a bed.
470
00:37:52,883 --> 00:37:58,403
Chief Justice John Roberts said the leak
was the work of "one bad apple."
471
00:37:58,483 --> 00:38:02,323
One bad apple is also a legal argument
used in Alito's opinion.
472
00:38:06,523 --> 00:38:10,843
As a man there's no way I can understand
the full impact of this issue.
473
00:38:10,923 --> 00:38:13,642
But I asked a bunch of women around
the office
474
00:38:13,722 --> 00:38:15,722
what their personal experience
was with abortion.
475
00:38:15,803 --> 00:38:20,122
And I gotta admit, I learned a lot from
the HR meeting they made me go to after.
476
00:38:22,682 --> 00:38:26,843
I do know this ruling will have a
disproportionate effect on poor people.
477
00:38:26,923 --> 00:38:30,282
Most Americans don't have access to the
same resources that even I do.
478
00:38:30,363 --> 00:38:33,762
The average person can't just text Lorne
in the middle of the night and say,
479
00:38:33,843 --> 00:38:34,923
"Yo, it happened again."
480
00:38:36,803 --> 00:38:39,242
I just don't get why Republicans
are so against this.
481
00:38:39,323 --> 00:38:43,003
I mean, maybe don't think of it as an
abortion, think of it as a patriot
482
00:38:43,082 --> 00:38:46,483
storming the uterus to overturn the
results of a pregnancy.
483
00:38:53,162 --> 00:38:56,403
Former New York City mayor and current
Rumplestiltskin
484
00:38:56,483 --> 00:39:01,003
Rudy Giuliani canceled an appearance
before the January 6th Comitee
485
00:39:01,082 --> 00:39:05,202
at the last minute Friday after he was
denied a request to record the interview.
486
00:39:05,282 --> 00:39:08,562
I assume on a loose VCR flashing 12.
487
00:39:11,162 --> 00:39:15,883
There are also uncofirmed reports that
Vladimir Putin will undergo cancer surgery
488
00:39:15,963 --> 00:39:19,682
I never thought I'd say this, but good
luck, cancer.
489
00:39:24,642 --> 00:39:28,682
This week the Supreme Court to fully
overturn Row v. Wade,
490
00:39:28,762 --> 00:39:31,762
here comes Conservative Justice
Amy Coney Barrett.
491
00:39:34,642 --> 00:39:35,883
- Hi. How are you?
- How are you?
492
00:39:36,762 --> 00:39:39,923
- Thanks for being here.
- I'm jazzed and juiced.
493
00:39:41,682 --> 00:39:44,242
I'm guessing you're pretty happy with the
draft of the ruling.
494
00:39:44,323 --> 00:39:47,562
I don't know what would make you think
that other than everything I've ever said.
495
00:39:49,003 --> 00:39:52,762
I listened to the case with an open mind
and asked all my question.
496
00:39:54,883 --> 00:39:58,282
Right, there was one... Justice Alito
notice then his opinion.
497
00:39:58,363 --> 00:40:01,722
You were asking about safe haven laws
where can you legally leave a baby
498
00:40:01,803 --> 00:40:03,883
at a fire station, no questions asked.
499
00:40:03,963 --> 00:40:05,483
That's right, Colin. I just like...
500
00:40:05,562 --> 00:40:09,843
I don't understand why you need abortion,
because you can leave a baby anywhere
501
00:40:09,923 --> 00:40:14,363
in the United States. What's the big deal?
Just pop it.
502
00:40:15,523 --> 00:40:20,443
- Just do the nine and plop.
- Just do the what?
503
00:40:20,523 --> 00:40:24,803
Do your nine, you know?
Do your nine, leave it on the sidewalk,
504
00:40:25,323 --> 00:40:30,682
wrap it up in, like a little Moses, put it
in a basket, just do your nine.
505
00:40:30,762 --> 00:40:35,562
It's simple. You are a murderer if you
have an abortion,
506
00:40:35,963 --> 00:40:39,162
but are you not a murderer if you put a
baby in a bag in a mailbox.
507
00:40:39,242 --> 00:40:43,843
- And that tracks, and it's good to me.
- Not everyone is good with that.
508
00:40:43,923 --> 00:40:47,323
Just give it to a stork and a
stork will give it to a lesbian.
509
00:40:48,843 --> 00:40:51,323
I would think the lesbians would be happy
cause now there's more babies
510
00:40:51,403 --> 00:40:58,403
for them to adopt. Come on ladies, it's
just nine, it's not even ten.
511
00:40:58,483 --> 00:40:59,923
So just do your nine and dump.
512
00:41:00,003 --> 00:41:05,443
- I don't think it's that simple.
- I have seven children and a job.
513
00:41:05,523 --> 00:41:10,602
And I make it work. Why every single other
woman can't get it done is beyond me.
514
00:41:10,682 --> 00:41:15,963
Unless I'm missing something about class
in America. Don't aswer that.
515
00:41:16,043 --> 00:41:19,443
Are you also suggesting that we don't need
abortion because theres no longer
516
00:41:19,523 --> 00:41:22,562
- the same sigma against unwed mothers?
- Exactly.
517
00:41:22,642 --> 00:41:26,803
You see a girl who's pregnant. You're not
going to stone her anymore.
518
00:41:26,883 --> 00:41:29,202
You're just gonna be like 'Hmm, okay.'
519
00:41:30,722 --> 00:41:34,323
If you get pregnant and you're not
married, you don't have to go to a
520
00:41:34,403 --> 00:41:35,843
spooky convent anymore.
521
00:41:35,923 --> 00:41:39,323
You just give a baby to a panther, Jungle
Book-it and that's your nine.
522
00:41:41,562 --> 00:41:44,803
- Stop just saying 'That's your nine'.
- What is more traumatic,
523
00:41:44,883 --> 00:41:49,483
safely ending an early pregnancy or give
birth to a baby you can never see again
524
00:41:49,562 --> 00:41:51,122
because you put it on a Ferris wheel?
525
00:41:51,682 --> 00:41:56,082
Colin, all I'm saying these lesbians will
be having a crap load
526
00:41:56,162 --> 00:41:59,162
of babies coming their way.
They should be kissing my boobs.
527
00:42:00,202 --> 00:42:02,122
I don't think they wanna do that.
528
00:42:02,642 --> 00:42:04,963
Also, I think a lot of the American feel
like you're kinda forcing
529
00:42:05,043 --> 00:42:09,483
- your conservative views on the country.
- Look. The court is not partisan.
530
00:42:09,963 --> 00:42:13,443
Our spouses on the other hand
are effing crazy.
531
00:42:15,003 --> 00:42:19,602
Scuse me, oh! Speak of, Clarence Thomas'
wife Ginni is always texting me,
532
00:42:19,682 --> 00:42:22,963
she's like in love with me. I'm like,
okay, les, you want a baby?
533
00:42:25,363 --> 00:42:29,282
Alright Justice, is there anything else
you'd like to say?
534
00:42:30,323 --> 00:42:32,843
Arby's, we have the babies.
535
00:42:32,923 --> 00:42:35,682
- Justice Barett everyone!
- Do your nine!
536
00:42:41,602 --> 00:42:46,602
A new report shows that 6 million
Americans identify as afro latinos.
537
00:42:46,682 --> 00:42:50,843
Afro latino is what Spirit Haloween calls
their unlicenced Bruno Mars costumes.
538
00:42:57,963 --> 00:43:01,162
New York City has launched a new campaign
to stop speeding in the city
539
00:43:01,242 --> 00:43:04,242
with a series
of signs designed to scare drivers.
540
00:43:04,323 --> 00:43:07,803
The terrifying signs read simply
"Entering new Jersey."
541
00:43:10,642 --> 00:43:14,562
Rock 'n roll Hall of Fame announced that
Dolly Parton would be inducted this year
542
00:43:14,642 --> 00:43:17,082
along with Eminem, Lionel Richie
and Carly Simon,
543
00:43:17,162 --> 00:43:20,003
which begs the question,
what is rock 'n roll?
544
00:43:21,762 --> 00:43:26,202
A bat used by Jackie Robinson was soldat
auction for more than $1 million.
545
00:43:26,282 --> 00:43:30,923
It is considered so valuable because he
used it in the All Star game,
546
00:43:31,003 --> 00:43:33,483
but also to get back to his car safely.
547
00:43:40,282 --> 00:43:43,043
Qantas has announce plans for new
direct flight from
548
00:43:43,122 --> 00:43:46,122
New York to Australia
that will take 19 hours.
549
00:43:46,202 --> 00:43:49,483
Not be outdone, Spirit Airlines also
announced a new flight
550
00:43:49,562 --> 00:43:53,043
from New York to Philadelphia that will
also take 19 hours.
551
00:43:57,762 --> 00:44:01,923
Archaeologists have
discovered a drawing in a cave in Alabama.
552
00:44:02,003 --> 00:44:03,523
And guys, they're bad.
553
00:44:08,602 --> 00:44:10,443
Really bad drawings.
554
00:44:11,762 --> 00:44:14,843
A British lawmaker resigned
after admitting he watched porn
555
00:44:14,923 --> 00:44:17,003
on his phone in the chambers of
Parliament,
556
00:44:17,082 --> 00:44:21,242
which seems pretty lame when our congress
allows full penetration.
557
00:44:26,403 --> 00:44:29,843
A colleague knew he was watching
porn when he voted pass by
558
00:44:29,923 --> 00:44:33,923
the count of 650 yays to one
Oh, my God yay.
559
00:44:37,082 --> 00:44:42,082
A 220 carat diamond known as The Rock will
become the largest white diamond
560
00:44:42,162 --> 00:44:45,162
ever auctioned off. Wow!
220 carats?
561
00:44:45,242 --> 00:44:48,202
And can you imagine the size of the child
who mined that?
562
00:44:52,242 --> 00:44:53,762
- Huge!
- Yeah, man.
563
00:44:53,843 --> 00:44:55,242
Happy Mother's Day!
564
00:44:55,323 --> 00:44:59,082
A woman at a bachelorette party in
Scotland was attacked
565
00:44:59,162 --> 00:45:01,242
while wearing an inflatable penis costume.
566
00:45:01,323 --> 00:45:05,523
She says she's still throbbing and her
head feels like it's ready to explode.
567
00:45:11,523 --> 00:45:16,642
The world, the record for the world's
oldest dog has been broken
568
00:45:16,722 --> 00:45:19,762
by a 21 year old Chihuahua
named Timothee Chalamet.
569
00:45:23,003 --> 00:45:26,363
- For "Weekend Update," I'm Michael Che.
- And I'm Colin Jost. Good night!
570
00:45:33,483 --> 00:45:36,323
We now return to Landsdowne
house.
571
00:45:40,523 --> 00:45:44,762
- Amelia, Kenneth.
- Christian, what a marvelous surprise.
572
00:45:44,843 --> 00:45:47,803
My brother in the flesh, why are you
here?
573
00:45:47,883 --> 00:45:49,963
Shouldn't you be away in Cornwall?
574
00:45:50,043 --> 00:45:53,883
I've left Cornwall.
I have something I must tell you.
575
00:45:53,963 --> 00:45:56,562
Let's hear it over tea.
Henry,
576
00:45:56,642 --> 00:45:59,043
- send for tea, please.
- Yes, mam.
577
00:45:59,963 --> 00:46:04,282
You say the great war has come to England,
and all of us must fight?
578
00:46:04,363 --> 00:46:07,043
- No.
- I felt duty bound to do my best.
579
00:46:07,122 --> 00:46:10,043
No, Christian, no.
580
00:46:10,122 --> 00:46:13,523
- What's happening?
- You know your sister has health spells.
581
00:46:13,602 --> 00:46:15,803
Amelia.
To the fainting couch.
582
00:46:15,883 --> 00:46:19,722
So, I've made a decision.
I'm off to war.
583
00:46:19,803 --> 00:46:21,443
Oh, no!
584
00:46:21,523 --> 00:46:22,682
Tea, mam.
585
00:46:25,043 --> 00:46:26,602
- Look what you've done!
- Oh, heavens!
586
00:46:26,682 --> 00:46:31,762
She's missed the couch.
Henry, fetch the elixirs.
587
00:46:31,843 --> 00:46:32,963
Yes, sir.
588
00:46:34,162 --> 00:46:38,003
I'm terribly sorry, it seems I've had
a tiny spell.
589
00:46:38,082 --> 00:46:41,122
More than a tiny one, my dear.
You've had a fritt.
590
00:46:41,202 --> 00:46:44,562
Oh, I'm perfectly fine.
Oh, Christian, it's you.
591
00:46:44,642 --> 00:46:47,323
I just had the most frightful dream that
were you going to war.
592
00:46:47,762 --> 00:46:53,363
That is no dream, Amelia, it's true.
I'm joining the armies on the frontline.
593
00:46:53,443 --> 00:46:57,883
The frontline, oh, no.
It's happening!
594
00:46:57,963 --> 00:47:02,242
Amelia, please, to the couch, my love.
Come this way!
595
00:47:02,843 --> 00:47:04,762
I'm sorry, she muss hear the truth.
596
00:47:04,843 --> 00:47:08,043
I shall leave Cornwall to seek
glory on the battlefield.
597
00:47:08,122 --> 00:47:09,403
Elixirs, now.
598
00:47:13,722 --> 00:47:17,323
- She's missed the couch again.
- Again? How?
599
00:47:17,403 --> 00:47:21,562
We need to steady her nerves.
Henry, don't just stand there.
600
00:47:21,642 --> 00:47:24,562
Bring the sherry. As many glasses as you
can carry.
601
00:47:24,642 --> 00:47:28,803
Of course, sir.
And don't worry, sir, I'm fine.
602
00:47:30,403 --> 00:47:33,642
- Oh, heavens, I've had a spell.
- Don't concern yourself, my dear.
603
00:47:33,722 --> 00:47:36,483
Your brother, it's his fault for
telling us like this!
604
00:47:36,562 --> 00:47:40,323
Oh, Cristian! Tehre you are!
You can still change your mind.
605
00:47:40,403 --> 00:47:42,923
Go back to Cornwall. Forget about this war
madness.
606
00:47:43,003 --> 00:47:47,162
No, Amelia, the die is cast.
You see, I've already enlisted.
607
00:47:47,242 --> 00:47:49,483
What, oh.
608
00:47:50,202 --> 00:47:53,523
This way, my dear. Oh, drat! She went the
other way .
609
00:48:03,122 --> 00:48:06,122
She is putting on quite the
show, isn't she?
610
00:48:07,323 --> 00:48:08,923
How dare you?
She could die.
611
00:48:09,003 --> 00:48:11,282
Oh, nooo.
612
00:48:11,363 --> 00:48:17,082
- Why are doing nothing?
- It must run its course.
613
00:48:17,162 --> 00:48:20,803
Steady, girl, steady, steady.
614
00:48:22,003 --> 00:48:26,843
Calm now. She just stepped and rolled
right over the couch.
615
00:48:26,923 --> 00:48:30,043
- Your Sherry, ma'am.
- Thank you, Henry.
616
00:48:30,122 --> 00:48:31,602
I think it's passed.
617
00:48:33,562 --> 00:48:34,843
Yes, I'm fine.
618
00:48:36,202 --> 00:48:39,443
Splendid. Let's revigorate your
constitution.
619
00:48:39,523 --> 00:48:43,963
Henry! Bring us a Saxberg soup.
Piping hot.
620
00:48:44,923 --> 00:48:48,403
Piping hot soup!
Yes, sir.
621
00:48:49,443 --> 00:48:53,762
- Now, my dear, are you all right?
- Oh, yes, I'm perfectly fine.
622
00:48:54,843 --> 00:48:57,003
I just seem to have a tiny cut
on my hands.
623
00:48:57,682 --> 00:48:59,202
Is that blood?
624
00:49:01,523 --> 00:49:03,122
To the couch, please!
625
00:49:03,202 --> 00:49:04,363
Soup is ready, sir.
626
00:49:06,122 --> 00:49:07,122
Steady.
627
00:49:09,523 --> 00:49:12,562
- Oh, no, no, please, sir.
- Yes.
628
00:49:16,963 --> 00:49:18,003
I'm terribly sorry.
629
00:49:18,803 --> 00:49:22,843
The fits runs in Bankfield family, you
see?
630
00:49:22,923 --> 00:49:28,162
Ever since we had a tiny bout
of inbreeding for the past 500 years.
631
00:49:29,202 --> 00:49:33,242
So, these spells could happen to me?
I could have them?
632
00:49:33,323 --> 00:49:36,682
- Perhaps I should not go to war, then.
- Oh, marvelous .
633
00:49:36,762 --> 00:49:39,443
This calls for a celebration.
Henry.
634
00:49:39,523 --> 00:49:42,923
Bring us the champagne and our
priceless Faberge eggs!
635
00:49:43,003 --> 00:49:44,323
Yes, sir.
636
00:49:54,602 --> 00:49:58,202
How many ways are there to
sit on the toilet?
637
00:49:58,282 --> 00:50:02,202
There's only one acceptable
way to sit on the toilet.
638
00:50:02,282 --> 00:50:05,523
- One way.
- One must sit upright.
639
00:50:05,602 --> 00:50:09,602
No slouching!
Back straight.
640
00:50:09,682 --> 00:50:12,043
Feet should be planted
firmly on the floor.
641
00:50:12,122 --> 00:50:16,403
And what should sitting on
the toilet never be?
642
00:50:16,483 --> 00:50:18,923
- Comfortable or relaxing.
- Correct.
643
00:50:19,722 --> 00:50:26,162
That is the number one rule.
And rules are meant to be...
644
00:50:26,242 --> 00:50:27,642
Broken!
645
00:50:35,242 --> 00:50:38,762
- Who are you?
- The next big thing.
646
00:50:43,403 --> 00:50:48,483
- Just what do you think you're doing?
- Changing everything.
647
00:50:59,122 --> 00:51:02,443
Introducing the reline,
from Koehler,
648
00:51:02,523 --> 00:51:06,483
the world's first toilet with reclining
tank, and extendable footrest.
649
00:51:06,562 --> 00:51:11,003
Bringing laid-back casual comfort into the
bathroom for the first time.
650
00:51:22,483 --> 00:51:23,963
Class dismissed.
651
00:51:24,043 --> 00:51:27,242
There is only one way to sit on
the toilet.
652
00:51:28,523 --> 00:51:30,363
Te ReKhline, from Koehler.
653
00:51:30,443 --> 00:51:34,242
Koehler, number one and
number two since 1873.
654
00:51:36,883 --> 00:51:39,602
Come on, buddy, let's grab
our seats.
655
00:51:39,682 --> 00:51:43,082
All right, I think the show
is starting.
656
00:51:45,483 --> 00:51:49,363
Hey, everybody! I know you came to
see Chuck E and his pals.
657
00:51:49,443 --> 00:51:53,323
But we're having some technical problems
and Chuck E and the pizza time band
658
00:51:53,403 --> 00:51:56,923
- are not running right now.
- Oh, that's why we came.
659
00:51:57,003 --> 00:51:59,043
Yeah, I know. I know.
I'm sorry about that.
660
00:51:59,122 --> 00:52:01,642
But the show must... go on.
661
00:52:01,722 --> 00:52:07,762
Good. Okay. And great news, I reached out
to my favorite band from 1983,
662
00:52:07,843 --> 00:52:12,043
and they were available. So,
please welcome, Reflection Denied.
663
00:52:17,003 --> 00:52:20,883
Amongst the basil and the pomodoro did I
experience my reveree
664
00:52:21,282 --> 00:52:23,202
here at Chuck E. Cheese.
665
00:52:23,282 --> 00:52:27,403
Existing in the little space
between the mall and the highway.
666
00:52:27,483 --> 00:52:31,403
- Before the big bang, there was...
- Pizza!
667
00:52:31,963 --> 00:52:34,923
Greetings children and
children of the mind.
668
00:52:35,483 --> 00:52:36,923
We are Reflection Denied.
669
00:52:37,003 --> 00:52:43,003
But today, I'm the eponymous rodent
Charles Entertainment Cheese.
670
00:52:43,082 --> 00:52:49,242
And I for Jasper Tenessee Jawles.
Join us on the sound scape of pizza.
671
00:52:49,323 --> 00:52:51,883
- Games.
- And soulful longing.
672
00:52:53,162 --> 00:52:59,202
I reached self-concept at the pizza plex
I forgot my taste and smell
673
00:52:59,282 --> 00:53:00,762
Games and sauce, Games and sauce.
674
00:53:00,843 --> 00:53:06,323
Keep falling, you read my mind
so well
675
00:53:06,403 --> 00:53:10,483
Oh, pizza pie in the pizza sky
676
00:53:10,562 --> 00:53:14,762
Deliver me, deliver me
677
00:53:15,883 --> 00:53:18,923
- This is fun, right, bud?
- Is this for kids?
678
00:53:20,562 --> 00:53:22,043
I think it's for him.
679
00:53:25,242 --> 00:53:31,003
I cried alone in the ball pit,
oh father where are you?
680
00:53:31,082 --> 00:53:33,043
Games and sauce, Games and sauce
681
00:53:33,122 --> 00:53:39,082
Mr. Pibb out of Dr Pepper
why do they have both
682
00:53:39,162 --> 00:53:42,523
Oh pizza pie in the pizza sky
683
00:53:42,602 --> 00:53:46,803
Deliver me deliver me
684
00:53:46,883 --> 00:53:51,323
If you'd like to book us for future gigs
or tip us in dipping dots please see Julie
685
00:53:51,403 --> 00:53:54,843
- Who is Julie?
- I'm guessing she is.
686
00:53:58,323 --> 00:54:01,403
Tokens for tickets,
tickets for prizes
687
00:54:01,923 --> 00:54:04,602
Parents paying for dreams
688
00:54:04,682 --> 00:54:11,162
Win an old yo-yo or iPod shuffle
they've been here since 2003
689
00:54:11,242 --> 00:54:14,923
Now we bring dispatches of
birthday celebrations,
690
00:54:15,003 --> 00:54:18,883
Colby G. and Mason S., congratulations on
the anniversary
691
00:54:18,963 --> 00:54:20,562
of emerging from
your mother's vagina.
692
00:54:22,323 --> 00:54:27,323
And to the Indian Ridge Little League
team, your coat says pizza is for winners.
693
00:54:27,403 --> 00:54:29,443
So tonight, you starve.
694
00:54:31,523 --> 00:54:35,642
Hark, do you hear that?
The rumbling of a thousand hungers.
695
00:54:35,722 --> 00:54:37,363
- Is it?
- It is.
696
00:54:37,443 --> 00:54:42,202
The physical voice of pizza.
The insatiable Mr. Munch!
697
00:54:49,722 --> 00:54:51,562
Pizza in my tummy
698
00:54:52,803 --> 00:54:55,963
It's Munch. He's hungry, right, bud?
699
00:54:57,162 --> 00:55:02,403
Hungry for validation for he was abandoned
on a Ferris wheel in Montreal.
700
00:55:02,483 --> 00:55:06,242
The bastard child of a Cirque du Soleil
performer and grimace.
701
00:55:06,323 --> 00:55:08,523
Applaud him,
applaud his bravery.
702
00:55:10,363 --> 00:55:14,082
Oh, pizza pie in the pizza sky
703
00:55:14,162 --> 00:55:17,483
Deliver me, deliver me
704
00:55:18,242 --> 00:55:24,363
-Oh, look, that's Pascuale the pizza chef.
- Was he always so sexy?
705
00:55:32,003 --> 00:55:34,122
Now children, a cautionary tale.
706
00:55:34,202 --> 00:55:37,883
Did you know that Chuck E.
Cheese has a salad bar?
707
00:55:37,963 --> 00:55:41,363
An untouched place where hope
goes to die.
708
00:55:41,443 --> 00:55:44,642
And here to tell us about this
Caty Carrot.
709
00:55:46,562 --> 00:55:53,242
Looking for 'contact under clear plastic,
broken disposable tongs
710
00:55:53,323 --> 00:56:00,082
Cold linguini, a peperoncino
where did we go wrong
711
00:56:00,162 --> 00:56:05,162
Romaine is all that remains
712
00:56:05,242 --> 00:56:06,843
She's dying
713
00:56:06,923 --> 00:56:12,642
Romaine is all that remains
714
00:56:14,483 --> 00:56:17,483
I know that carrot.
I've been that carrot.
715
00:56:18,562 --> 00:56:20,122
We are all that carrot.
716
00:56:21,242 --> 00:56:26,403
Tonight, the call goes out to all the
world, throw off the shackles
717
00:56:26,483 --> 00:56:29,963
of your darkness, your religion, your
racial animus.
718
00:56:30,043 --> 00:56:33,883
And unite under one banner,
the banner of pizza!
719
00:56:33,963 --> 00:56:37,923
Also the pink gun on the
time crisis game is broken.
720
00:56:38,003 --> 00:56:40,242
And someone left a diaper in the ball pit.
721
00:56:40,323 --> 00:56:42,003
Now unite and sing!
722
00:56:42,082 --> 00:56:46,043
Pizza pie in the pizza sky
723
00:56:46,122 --> 00:56:50,003
Deliver me deliver me
724
00:57:01,682 --> 00:57:03,602
Once again, Arcade Fire!
725
00:57:09,443 --> 00:57:11,242
One, two, three, four.
726
01:02:33,722 --> 01:02:35,883
Hey, guys.
I'm Chloe Fineman.
727
01:02:36,602 --> 01:02:38,762
It's been a really unique season.
728
01:02:38,843 --> 01:02:41,363
And people are always asking
what happens when a cast member
729
01:02:41,443 --> 01:02:43,162
has to miss a show because
they're sick?
730
01:02:43,242 --> 01:02:48,162
Well, that's where I come in.
I am the show's official understudy.
731
01:02:49,682 --> 01:02:52,403
So every week, I run lines with all the
cast members
732
01:02:52,483 --> 01:02:54,523
just in case I need to jump
into their roles.
733
01:02:55,162 --> 01:02:57,202
Do you think we can take it
from the top of the sketch?
734
01:02:57,282 --> 01:03:00,803
Yeah, yeah. Exterior Met gala, Kate is an
"E! News" correspondent.
735
01:03:00,883 --> 01:03:03,843
Okay.
So... hey, guys, how are you?
736
01:03:04,883 --> 01:03:11,043
What? What?
God, what?
737
01:03:11,122 --> 01:03:14,803
You want to get more intimate
with it. You want to do a bigger spread.
738
01:03:14,883 --> 01:03:19,483
Spread as big as you can. Just make people
uncomfortable with what you're doing.
739
01:03:21,963 --> 01:03:23,803
- Gorgeous!
- Gorgeous!
740
01:03:23,883 --> 01:03:26,602
To really capture the essence
of a cast member,
741
01:03:26,682 --> 01:03:29,523
you have to shadow them as they go about
their everyday routines.
742
01:03:29,602 --> 01:03:32,602
Yeah, well, I thought it was funny, but
during the show it wasn't on the cue card.
743
01:03:32,682 --> 01:03:36,043
- It wasn't on the cue card,
- No, no.
744
01:03:36,122 --> 01:03:37,443
- Well.
- Well, yeah.
745
01:03:37,523 --> 01:03:39,483
- Yeah.
- What are you going to do?
746
01:03:39,562 --> 01:03:43,843
Some of the cast members use me as an
understudy for their personal lives.
747
01:03:43,923 --> 01:03:47,122
Thanks so much for doing this, Chloe.
I'm so bad at breakups.
748
01:03:47,202 --> 01:03:48,562
Truly, no problem.
749
01:03:50,323 --> 01:03:54,043
Hey, pal! Oh, man I just wanna
talk to you too.
750
01:03:54,122 --> 01:03:58,403
But I see it as more of a pal, you know?
So, it's just not going to work out.
751
01:04:01,722 --> 01:04:05,682
- Thanks pal, you're the best.
- Oh, man. I frickin' love you.
752
01:04:06,883 --> 01:04:09,443
Understudies have a very
strict code of ethics.
753
01:04:09,523 --> 01:04:12,722
Like, no matter how good my
Elizabeth Olsen impression is,
754
01:04:12,803 --> 01:04:15,282
I would never use to it trick
Benedict.
755
01:04:16,082 --> 01:04:18,282
Benedict, it's your friend
Elizabeth Olsen.
756
01:04:18,363 --> 01:04:21,443
Hey, you made it.
You're in costume.
757
01:04:21,523 --> 01:04:23,003
Well, I love Marvel.
758
01:04:24,762 --> 01:04:28,043
And speaking of, do you know who would be
great in the next Doctor Strange?
759
01:04:28,122 --> 01:04:30,722
SNL's understudy Chloe Fineman.
760
01:04:30,803 --> 01:04:31,762
Benedict?
761
01:04:33,122 --> 01:04:37,523
- What's going on?
- I thought I was talking to you.
762
01:04:38,162 --> 01:04:40,323
- No, I'm me.
- No, so am I.
763
01:04:41,443 --> 01:04:43,642
- I am me.
- I am me too.
764
01:04:44,363 --> 01:04:47,602
Oh, my God.
The multiverse is real.
765
01:04:48,722 --> 01:04:51,363
Has anyone asked me to be an
understudy? No.
766
01:04:51,762 --> 01:04:53,923
But they haven't asked me to stop.
767
01:04:54,003 --> 01:04:56,803
Okay, guys. Rapid fire.
Tell me if I get it. Aidy?
768
01:04:57,642 --> 01:05:03,403
- Googly, gabblely. That ass.
- Nailed it, no notes. That ass.
769
01:05:03,483 --> 01:05:07,523
- Heidi. Hey, dude.
- We're strong so far, but fine.
770
01:05:07,602 --> 01:05:13,162
- Sarah. Hello, hello!
- Wait, do I sound like a jewish parrot?
771
01:05:13,242 --> 01:05:14,443
Yeah.
772
01:05:14,523 --> 01:05:17,202
- Okay, who's left? Ego.
- Pass.
773
01:05:17,282 --> 01:05:18,682
And I thank you for that.
774
01:05:18,762 --> 01:05:22,082
I know what you guys are thinking.
What happens if I get sick?
775
01:05:22,162 --> 01:05:26,762
Well I actually have my own understudy who
does a perfect impression of me.
776
01:05:27,483 --> 01:05:30,003
Yo, bitch, I'm Chloe Fineberg!
777
01:05:41,923 --> 01:05:45,803
Thank you Arcade Fire and to my
team: Katie, Donna, Jerry and Amy.
778
01:05:45,883 --> 01:05:49,003
You know they're amazing, all the great
writers and the cast of all casts.
779
01:05:49,082 --> 01:05:52,762
This season has been amazing. To be part
of it is a real honor. Thank you.
780
01:05:52,843 --> 01:05:56,403
Ladies and gentlemen, once
again, Arcade Fire!
68863
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