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1
00:00:01,084 --> 00:00:04,017
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
2
00:00:04,152 --> 00:00:07,021
- No, no, no, I'm telling you...
- I hear you telling me,
3
00:00:07,022 --> 00:00:08,822
- and I'm telling you you're wrong.
- No way.
4
00:00:08,823 --> 00:00:11,424
You know and I know
that I'm right.
5
00:00:11,426 --> 00:00:13,326
How would you know if you're
right about anything?
6
00:00:13,328 --> 00:00:15,061
It'd be a completely foreign feeling.
7
00:00:15,063 --> 00:00:17,665
- Quitting time.
- It's not quitting time.
8
00:00:17,666 --> 00:00:20,801
- And yet here I go.
- Wait. Settle an argument.
9
00:00:20,802 --> 00:00:23,231
Remember when we were ten years
old, and Hank and I burried
10
00:00:23,266 --> 00:00:26,040
- something in a coffee tin in the woods?
- No. See you tomorrow!
11
00:00:26,041 --> 00:00:28,576
We told you about this.
We had a red coffee tin,
12
00:00:28,577 --> 00:00:30,578
and we put something inside it
and buried it.
13
00:00:30,579 --> 00:00:35,049
Ah, the red coffee tin!
No. I gotta go.
14
00:00:35,050 --> 00:00:36,851
It's Darts Night,
and as League Commissioner,
15
00:00:36,852 --> 00:00:38,152
I'm in charge of setting it up.
16
00:00:38,153 --> 00:00:41,821
Right, no one else knows
how to take darts out of a jar.
17
00:00:41,823 --> 00:00:44,357
It's not a jar, it's a canister.
18
00:00:44,359 --> 00:00:46,693
And at least I know
what's in mine.
19
00:00:46,695 --> 00:00:49,230
Quality burn.
And I'm done arguing.
20
00:00:49,231 --> 00:00:51,331
We put half a pack of
cigarettes in that tin.
21
00:00:51,333 --> 00:00:53,868
- Period.
- Nope. It was a bag of weed.
22
00:00:53,869 --> 00:00:57,070
It was not weed!
We never had weed in our lives.
23
00:00:57,072 --> 00:00:58,706
Why would we have weed?
24
00:00:58,707 --> 00:01:02,143
Why would we bury cigarettes?
Cigarettes aren't illegal.
25
00:01:02,144 --> 00:01:04,911
They are when you're ten.
We buried them
26
00:01:04,912 --> 00:01:06,713
because the second
we tried to fire one up,
27
00:01:06,715 --> 00:01:09,350
we always got caught.
Immediately. Every time.
28
00:01:09,351 --> 00:01:11,018
So we planned
to smoke them in the woods
29
00:01:11,019 --> 00:01:12,019
and we never got around to it,
30
00:01:12,020 --> 00:01:14,637
30 years passed,
and your memory got fuzzy.
31
00:01:14,672 --> 00:01:16,890
Probably fuzzy from
all the weed we smoked.
32
00:01:16,892 --> 00:01:18,625
We never smoked weed!
33
00:01:18,627 --> 00:01:22,162
♪ You think there's
not a lot goin' on ♪
34
00:01:22,164 --> 00:01:25,465
♪ Look closer, baby
you're so wrong ♪
35
00:01:25,704 --> 00:01:28,773
2x08 - Bush League
36
00:01:29,236 --> 00:01:31,704
I remember it crystally clear!
37
00:01:31,706 --> 00:01:33,373
We wanted to hide the stuff,
38
00:01:33,374 --> 00:01:35,041
so you went and got a coffee tin.
39
00:01:35,043 --> 00:01:37,745
When you came back to my
place and knocked on the door,
40
00:01:37,746 --> 00:01:39,479
I was too high to let you in.
41
00:01:39,481 --> 00:01:41,481
That's from
a Cheech and Chong album.
42
00:01:41,483 --> 00:01:43,050
Why are you...
okay, you know what,
43
00:01:43,051 --> 00:01:44,552
there's only one way to settle this.
44
00:01:44,553 --> 00:01:46,786
We go out to the woods tonight,
dig up the tin,
45
00:01:46,788 --> 00:01:49,156
- and see what's inside.
- You're on. You close up.
46
00:01:49,157 --> 00:01:52,993
- I'll go get some digging stuff.
- "Digging stuff."
47
00:01:52,994 --> 00:01:54,595
How do you remember
what we buried 30 years ago
48
00:01:54,596 --> 00:01:56,874
if you can't remember
the word "shovel"?
49
00:01:59,166 --> 00:02:02,001
- Hello, partner.
- Emma's your partner.
50
00:02:02,003 --> 00:02:04,271
She's my darts partner.
You're my cop...
51
00:02:04,272 --> 00:02:07,308
- you know what I mean.
- Ready to take another beating?
52
00:02:07,309 --> 00:02:11,911
You barely beat us last week.
This week, it's revenge time.
53
00:02:11,913 --> 00:02:15,481
Ah, care to place
a friendly wager, partner?
54
00:02:15,483 --> 00:02:17,985
- I'm your partner.
- He's my... argh, never mind.
55
00:02:17,986 --> 00:02:20,888
- Loser cleans the fridge at work.
- Cleans the fridge?
56
00:02:20,889 --> 00:02:23,523
That thing is full
of moldy macaroni salad.
57
00:02:23,525 --> 00:02:25,625
Bock bock bock bock.
58
00:02:25,627 --> 00:02:28,963
That was chicken salad?
Oh.
59
00:02:28,964 --> 00:02:29,964
It's a bet.
60
00:02:29,965 --> 00:02:32,498
Any wagering has to
be authorized by me,
61
00:02:32,500 --> 00:02:34,634
as league commissioner
and founder of the entire...
62
00:02:34,636 --> 00:02:36,136
We know!
63
00:02:36,137 --> 00:02:37,338
Then I will allow it.
64
00:02:37,339 --> 00:02:41,507
Hey, Phil, I think I'll have
a scotch tonight.
65
00:02:41,509 --> 00:02:42,738
Settle my nerves.
66
00:02:42,790 --> 00:02:45,212
And how you come partnered up
with Davis and not Oscar?
67
00:02:45,213 --> 00:02:48,482
I joined darts for fun.
Oscar's the opposite of that.
68
00:02:48,483 --> 00:02:51,284
I love him, but sometimes
I need a bit of distance.
69
00:02:51,286 --> 00:02:52,986
He's nine feet away.
70
00:02:54,288 --> 00:02:56,155
I'll take what I can get.
71
00:02:56,157 --> 00:02:58,691
Besides, Oscar
can't play darts anymore.
72
00:02:58,693 --> 00:03:02,129
- Physically or legally?
- Emotionally. He used to compete.
73
00:03:02,130 --> 00:03:04,163
Three times
Golden Flights champion.
74
00:03:04,165 --> 00:03:05,865
But there was...
75
00:03:05,867 --> 00:03:08,736
- an incident.
- So? Oscar has four incidents
76
00:03:08,737 --> 00:03:10,204
every day before breakfast.
77
00:03:10,205 --> 00:03:12,639
Often followed
by a brunch incident.
78
00:03:12,641 --> 00:03:17,043
No, nothing like this.
This was The Incident.
79
00:03:17,045 --> 00:03:18,912
Never bring it up to Oscar.
80
00:03:18,914 --> 00:03:22,584
- He hates talking about it.
- Oh.
81
00:03:24,652 --> 00:03:27,187
- Ready to hit the woods?
- Dunno.
82
00:03:27,188 --> 00:03:28,856
You think you brought enough gear?
83
00:03:28,857 --> 00:03:31,404
- You can never be too prepared.
- Really?
84
00:03:31,462 --> 00:03:33,093
We're going half
a mile out of town.
85
00:03:33,094 --> 00:03:34,628
You're packed like
it's a moon launch.
86
00:03:34,629 --> 00:03:37,498
- You're not bringing any survival gear?
- My phone.
87
00:03:37,499 --> 00:03:40,083
If it makes you feel better,
I can call it a survival phone.
88
00:03:40,118 --> 00:03:42,669
Hey, Oscar.
Whatcha doing?
89
00:03:42,671 --> 00:03:45,772
Building a snow fort.
What's it look like I'm doing?!
90
00:03:45,774 --> 00:03:48,008
Hmm. You seem cranky.
91
00:03:48,009 --> 00:03:51,144
- Something bothering you?
- Not up until ten seconds ago.
92
00:03:51,146 --> 00:03:53,112
Do these games
being played nearby
93
00:03:53,114 --> 00:03:57,016
remind you of any...
particular situation,
94
00:03:57,018 --> 00:03:59,887
- or what's another word for...
- Incident?
95
00:03:59,888 --> 00:04:02,256
Yeah, for "incident."
Occasion...?
96
00:04:02,257 --> 00:04:05,857
You mean... The Incident?
97
00:04:08,148 --> 00:04:11,567
Well, since you brought it up.
98
00:04:12,106 --> 00:04:14,374
Yeah!
Nailed it!
99
00:04:14,375 --> 00:04:16,676
We got good lead
on them now, Emma.
100
00:04:16,678 --> 00:04:20,480
A good what?
Oh, lead, yes, good.
101
00:04:20,482 --> 00:04:23,183
- Are you into this?
- Good to hear.
102
00:04:23,184 --> 00:04:26,686
They're getting too far ahead.
We gotta pick up our game.
103
00:04:26,688 --> 00:04:28,388
I haven't been throwing well.
104
00:04:28,389 --> 00:04:31,458
Too focused on my other duties
as league commissioner.
105
00:04:31,459 --> 00:04:34,628
- Oh, for the love of...
- But that all turns around...
106
00:04:34,629 --> 00:04:36,329
now!
107
00:04:36,763 --> 00:04:40,466
Now!
Okay, just gotta relax.
108
00:04:41,468 --> 00:04:43,137
Okay, that's too relaxed.
109
00:04:44,072 --> 00:04:48,142
Damn. It's the station line.
D.R.P.D.
110
00:04:48,143 --> 00:04:50,511
Ugh. Fine.
I'll be right there.
111
00:04:50,512 --> 00:04:51,678
There? Where?
112
00:04:51,679 --> 00:04:53,913
I'm the cop on call,
and there's been a break-in.
113
00:04:53,915 --> 00:04:55,615
You're off to play cops and robbers?
114
00:04:55,617 --> 00:04:58,184
Listen, Miss Marple, this is darts!
115
00:04:58,186 --> 00:05:00,587
Ha!
♪ You lost your partner ♪
116
00:05:00,588 --> 00:05:04,323
We win by default.
♪ Enjoy that moldy macaroni! ♪
117
00:05:04,325 --> 00:05:06,627
Argh!
I should've said "molderoni."
118
00:05:06,628 --> 00:05:09,429
Whoa, we didn't lose.
I get to name a replacement.
119
00:05:09,430 --> 00:05:11,430
Karen was dragging
me down anyways.
120
00:05:11,432 --> 00:05:13,733
I don't like to talk about it.
121
00:05:13,735 --> 00:05:16,035
It was a night much like this.
122
00:05:16,037 --> 00:05:18,072
- Many years ago...
- Lacey!
123
00:05:18,073 --> 00:05:19,840
- What?
- You're on my darts team.
124
00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:22,475
You can't just pull someone
from the crowd.
125
00:05:22,477 --> 00:05:25,679
- I've never thrown a dart in my life.
- Lacey's in for Karen.
126
00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:28,581
Don't you want to hear
about The Incident?
127
00:05:28,583 --> 00:05:30,561
I never talk about it!
128
00:05:32,986 --> 00:05:35,621
Okay, we just have
to find the right tree.
129
00:05:35,623 --> 00:05:38,592
Look for the toy parachute man
we hung up in the branches.
130
00:05:38,593 --> 00:05:40,027
I think we're in the wrong area.
131
00:05:40,028 --> 00:05:43,296
These trees are way taller
than the ones we hung it in.
132
00:05:43,298 --> 00:05:46,667
- It was thirty years ago.
- True, been a long time...
133
00:05:46,668 --> 00:05:49,802
But I distinctly remember
the trees being shorter.
134
00:05:49,804 --> 00:05:52,772
Stick with ol' Hank,
and you'll be fine.
135
00:05:52,774 --> 00:05:55,274
Ugh, I can see that engraved
on my tombstone.
136
00:05:55,276 --> 00:05:58,544
- So, what do I do?
- Keep your toe behind the line,
137
00:05:58,546 --> 00:06:01,081
point the dart,
and just try to hit the board.
138
00:06:01,082 --> 00:06:03,382
Well, aren't I supposed to
hit some number or something?
139
00:06:03,384 --> 00:06:06,152
Well, ideally you'd hit
the double eight,
140
00:06:06,154 --> 00:06:07,854
but just worry about...
141
00:06:07,955 --> 00:06:10,991
- Whoa! Double eight!
- You said you never played!
142
00:06:10,992 --> 00:06:13,493
I haven't,
but it's pretty straight forward.
143
00:06:13,494 --> 00:06:15,194
Can you hit the six?
144
00:06:16,129 --> 00:06:18,164
Oboy! She's a natural.
145
00:06:18,166 --> 00:06:19,833
I have never seen anything like this
146
00:06:19,834 --> 00:06:23,743
- in all my weeks as league commissioner.
- I'm back! It wasn't a break-in.
147
00:06:23,744 --> 00:06:25,738
Helen heard voices
but it was just her TV.
148
00:06:25,739 --> 00:06:27,741
Guess she thought
burglars broke in to talk
149
00:06:27,742 --> 00:06:29,743
about an Acorn Stairlift for 30 minutes.
150
00:06:29,744 --> 00:06:33,779
- Well, that was fun, thanks.
- Whoa, whoa. Hey.
151
00:06:33,781 --> 00:06:36,415
Listen, Karen, here's the thing...
152
00:06:36,417 --> 00:06:40,052
Lacey filled in, and,
well, she's really good.
153
00:06:40,054 --> 00:06:41,121
You're more...
154
00:06:41,122 --> 00:06:43,156
uh, what's the word...
not.
155
00:06:43,157 --> 00:06:45,859
- So what are you saying?
- Lacey's my new partner.
156
00:06:45,860 --> 00:06:49,852
It's not personal, it's just
a brutal reality of competitive sports.
157
00:06:49,887 --> 00:06:53,566
- Thanks for understanding.
- I don't understanding. Understand.
158
00:06:53,568 --> 00:06:56,802
We could put it to a vote,
but it'd be two against one.
159
00:06:56,804 --> 00:06:59,071
That's just the brutal
reality of math.
160
00:06:59,073 --> 00:07:02,342
But if we're trying to win,
then I should partner with Karen.
161
00:07:02,343 --> 00:07:04,445
- She's way better than you.
- Yeah, didn't you
162
00:07:04,446 --> 00:07:06,213
miss the board entirely
and hit the wall?
163
00:07:06,214 --> 00:07:08,315
And then miss the wall entirely
and hit the floor?
164
00:07:08,316 --> 00:07:10,550
- I vote Karen.
- I vote me.
165
00:07:10,551 --> 00:07:12,251
I vote ouch.
166
00:07:15,262 --> 00:07:18,065
- Are you sure this is the tree?
- 100%.
167
00:07:18,066 --> 00:07:20,066
Look at that jagged
branch on the left.
168
00:07:20,068 --> 00:07:23,303
You'll see a tiny little...
hang on. Nope.
169
00:07:23,304 --> 00:07:25,905
- So now it isn't the tree?
- 100% not.
170
00:07:25,906 --> 00:07:28,074
Okay, we 100% gotta
turn around and go back.
171
00:07:28,076 --> 00:07:30,376
Wait, our tree's just up ahead.
172
00:07:30,378 --> 00:07:32,245
You said that about 12 trees in a row.
173
00:07:32,247 --> 00:07:35,315
You think every tree is the tree.
You've gone tree mad.
174
00:07:35,316 --> 00:07:36,583
We're lost, and I'm
calling for help.
175
00:07:36,584 --> 00:07:39,252
No! We're not lost.
Don't call.
176
00:07:39,254 --> 00:07:42,388
I won't call if you'll
just admit that we're lost.
177
00:07:42,390 --> 00:07:44,457
Okay, fine. We're lost.
178
00:07:44,459 --> 00:07:46,927
- Then it's time to get help.
- You said you wouldn't call!
179
00:07:46,928 --> 00:07:49,046
Didn't say I wouldn't text.
180
00:07:54,541 --> 00:07:56,675
Wait.
You can't do this to me.
181
00:07:56,676 --> 00:07:58,144
Do what?
Save your life?
182
00:07:58,145 --> 00:07:59,878
People in town
can't know I got lost.
183
00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:03,648
They look up to me as a rugged,
survivalist Bear Grylls type.
184
00:08:03,650 --> 00:08:05,350
Bad News Bear Grylls, maybe.
185
00:08:05,352 --> 00:08:07,052
Come on.
Put your phone away.
186
00:08:07,053 --> 00:08:09,220
Give me a chance
to get us out of here.
187
00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:12,391
How? Do you even have
a compass in that backpack?
188
00:08:12,392 --> 00:08:14,125
My compass is internal.
189
00:08:14,127 --> 00:08:17,562
It's called a finely tuned
sense of direction.
190
00:08:17,564 --> 00:08:19,264
What? Takes a while to warm up.
191
00:08:20,403 --> 00:08:23,439
- Yes! We're catching up!
- This game is too easy.
192
00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:25,140
I'm gonna throw one left-handed.
193
00:08:25,674 --> 00:08:29,678
- You can't miss!
- This is terrible. They could win.
194
00:08:29,679 --> 00:08:31,813
But look how much fun
they're having.
195
00:08:31,815 --> 00:08:35,150
- I'm gonna try left-handed.
- No!
196
00:08:35,851 --> 00:08:38,019
♪ You can't miss me, baby ♪
197
00:08:38,021 --> 00:08:42,424
- Whoopsie!
- You totally wasted an entire throw.
198
00:08:42,426 --> 00:08:45,027
Do you want to win or not?
This is important, Emma.
199
00:08:45,028 --> 00:08:48,263
Do you want to see me covered
in moldy macaroni salad?
200
00:08:48,265 --> 00:08:52,067
Never occurred to me,
but now I kind of do, yeah.
201
00:08:52,069 --> 00:08:53,736
Pretty slack attitude, Emma.
202
00:08:53,737 --> 00:08:56,472
Davis is right to want you off
his team and be replaced by me.
203
00:08:56,473 --> 00:08:59,040
Okay, new team, new day!
204
00:08:59,042 --> 00:09:02,711
Sorry, Wanda, you're too intense.
Makes me nervous.
205
00:09:02,712 --> 00:09:06,047
- But I started this league!
- Plus you say that too much.
206
00:09:07,883 --> 00:09:09,485
Exclude me from my own thing...
207
00:09:09,486 --> 00:09:12,554
- I started darts night, you know.
- I know.
208
00:09:12,555 --> 00:09:15,156
Darts can be a hard thing
to walk away from.
209
00:09:15,158 --> 00:09:17,693
- Me? I had to.
- Without me, these jerks
210
00:09:17,694 --> 00:09:19,928
would be sitting around
thumbing their bungs.
211
00:09:19,930 --> 00:09:22,030
Yeah, I don't like
to talk about it much,
212
00:09:22,032 --> 00:09:25,301
- but there was an incident...
- Indecent is right.
213
00:09:25,302 --> 00:09:27,903
- "Incident."
- It's indecent the way they treat me.
214
00:09:27,904 --> 00:09:29,871
It's hard for me not
to talk about this
215
00:09:29,873 --> 00:09:31,273
when you won't even listen!
216
00:09:31,274 --> 00:09:34,343
I do all the work,
and they just swoop in...
217
00:09:34,344 --> 00:09:35,277
Augh!
218
00:09:35,278 --> 00:09:37,980
Way to go, Wanda!
You made me miss!
219
00:09:37,981 --> 00:09:39,981
It was an accident!
220
00:09:39,983 --> 00:09:42,884
But maybe the next one won't be.
221
00:09:42,886 --> 00:09:45,620
If I can't play, no one will play.
222
00:09:45,622 --> 00:09:48,690
I won't play.
Not after The Incident.
223
00:09:48,692 --> 00:09:51,392
I might tell you
if you don't ask me about it.
224
00:09:51,394 --> 00:09:53,327
Deal.
225
00:09:57,800 --> 00:09:59,701
I think we're even more lost.
226
00:09:59,703 --> 00:10:01,636
Is there such a thing as more lost?
227
00:10:01,638 --> 00:10:04,506
You mean get so lost
that we find ourselves?
228
00:10:04,508 --> 00:10:06,942
- Food for thought.
- Speaking of food, I'm hungry.
229
00:10:06,943 --> 00:10:08,776
I've given you enough time
to find a way out of here.
230
00:10:08,778 --> 00:10:11,846
- I'm calling for help.
- No! You're going to ruin my rep.
231
00:10:11,848 --> 00:10:15,383
Sorry, Hank, the stomach wants
what the stomach wants.
232
00:10:15,385 --> 00:10:17,852
Wait, I have granola bars.
233
00:10:17,854 --> 00:10:20,355
Ooh, with the chocolatey coating.
234
00:10:20,357 --> 00:10:23,092
- Here, have one.
- One?
235
00:10:23,093 --> 00:10:25,693
Hmm. I bet if I called...
236
00:10:25,695 --> 00:10:29,430
- someone'd bring me a whole box.
- Fine, take it.
237
00:10:31,901 --> 00:10:34,335
Oh, my god, there's
little marshmallows too.
238
00:10:35,871 --> 00:10:38,239
This is a little awkward, but...
239
00:10:38,241 --> 00:10:40,808
you missed that last shot
really badly.
240
00:10:40,810 --> 00:10:44,022
I find it helpful to keep
your eye on the target.
241
00:10:44,102 --> 00:10:47,381
Learned a lot in the 15 minutes
you've been playing darts, haven't you?
242
00:10:47,441 --> 00:10:50,152
I know, right?
Now, let's go win!
243
00:10:50,153 --> 00:10:52,520
Yeah.
Go team.
244
00:10:54,290 --> 00:10:55,490
Aah!
245
00:10:55,491 --> 00:10:58,059
Just taking some photos for
DailyDartWorld.com.
246
00:10:58,061 --> 00:11:01,563
Thanks a lot, Wanda.
You made me miss all the numbers.
247
00:11:01,565 --> 00:11:03,565
Oh, come on!
248
00:11:12,708 --> 00:11:15,543
Ho ho ho ho ho...
nice try, bug.
249
00:11:15,545 --> 00:11:17,879
You think I've never
seen The Three Stooges?
250
00:11:17,881 --> 00:11:19,782
I've watched more...
Ow!
251
00:11:19,783 --> 00:11:21,817
He bit me.
These bugs are terrible.
252
00:11:21,818 --> 00:11:24,252
You shoulda brought
a bug net built for two.
253
00:11:24,254 --> 00:11:28,657
- That is a bug net built for two.
- Oh. Well, it's not very warm.
254
00:11:28,658 --> 00:11:32,827
The sun's down, and here's you,
unprepared, in just a t-shirt.
255
00:11:32,829 --> 00:11:36,731
True.
I could call someone for a scarf.
256
00:11:36,733 --> 00:11:38,433
Unless...
257
00:11:41,171 --> 00:11:44,125
Cozy.
What is this, flannel?
258
00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:45,807
Hey, Davis, just curious.
259
00:11:45,809 --> 00:11:48,876
Do you breathe in or out
when you release?
260
00:11:48,878 --> 00:11:51,246
Nice try, but you
won't distract me
261
00:11:51,248 --> 00:11:53,883
with your petty mind games.
262
00:11:59,055 --> 00:12:00,888
Dart in the hat.
Classic.
263
00:12:00,890 --> 00:12:05,627
Darts are a cruel game.
I learned that the hard way...
264
00:12:05,629 --> 00:12:07,029
from The Incident.
265
00:12:07,030 --> 00:12:09,999
- She's in my head.
- Just ignore her.
266
00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:12,700
This next shot's gotta be stellar.
267
00:12:14,837 --> 00:12:18,172
- Ow!
- Dart in the cheek. Classic.
268
00:12:18,174 --> 00:12:22,844
- What's darts without a vuvuzela?
- What's a vuvuzela?
269
00:12:24,914 --> 00:12:26,814
You'd think I would have
annoyed those jerks
270
00:12:26,816 --> 00:12:29,684
into quitting by now.
It only took me six tweets
271
00:12:29,685 --> 00:12:32,620
to get those NASA nerds
to declassify Pluto,
272
00:12:32,622 --> 00:12:34,656
and then four to reclassify it.
273
00:12:34,658 --> 00:12:38,059
- Pick a side, eggheads.
- I was on a side once.
274
00:12:38,061 --> 00:12:41,297
The wrong side.
Of an incident.
275
00:12:41,298 --> 00:12:45,668
- It's a dark story, best left untold.
- Did you say "dark"?
276
00:12:45,669 --> 00:12:48,636
All right, quit hounding me.
I'll tell you.
277
00:12:48,638 --> 00:12:50,873
- It was a night much like this...
- Great story.
278
00:12:50,874 --> 00:12:53,341
Phil, I need a copy
of the hotel blueprints.
279
00:12:53,343 --> 00:12:55,577
Blueprints?
Sure thing.
280
00:12:55,578 --> 00:12:58,313
I'll have Tony Stark
fax them right over.
281
00:12:58,315 --> 00:13:00,683
Facts?
I'll tell you the facts.
282
00:13:00,684 --> 00:13:03,951
It was a night much like this...
283
00:13:08,790 --> 00:13:11,559
This is just like Naked and Afraid.
284
00:13:11,561 --> 00:13:13,427
More like Naked-except-
for-your-underwear
285
00:13:13,429 --> 00:13:16,230
and Afraid.
Which I'm fine with.
286
00:13:16,232 --> 00:13:17,733
You should be so lucky.
287
00:13:17,734 --> 00:13:20,101
Hey, how'd you make
a hammock out of pants?
288
00:13:21,471 --> 00:13:23,838
- You got any beans left?
- Nope, sorry.
289
00:13:23,839 --> 00:13:25,373
But if we call for help now,
290
00:13:25,374 --> 00:13:27,675
there'll be time to grab
a frozen pizza at Foo Mart.
291
00:13:27,677 --> 00:13:30,745
No! Real outdoorsmen
forage for food anyway.
292
00:13:30,747 --> 00:13:33,914
I bet I can find some berries.
And bark.
293
00:13:33,915 --> 00:13:37,544
- You be careful out there.
- I know what I'm doing.
294
00:13:38,287 --> 00:13:41,638
And now we know
what's your tombstone.
295
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:48,702
Mm... oh... oh.
296
00:13:50,305 --> 00:13:52,672
Oh, I don't feel so good.
297
00:13:52,674 --> 00:13:54,874
I hope those berries
weren't poisonous.
298
00:13:54,876 --> 00:13:57,177
Oh, no, no, no.
The berries were all right.
299
00:13:57,179 --> 00:13:58,713
I'm an expert on the woods.
300
00:13:58,714 --> 00:14:01,348
Hey, bears don't
usually talk, do they?
301
00:14:01,350 --> 00:14:04,385
You're the expert. Maybe I'm
communicating telepathically.
302
00:14:04,386 --> 00:14:05,953
Ah, yeah, that makes more sense.
303
00:14:05,954 --> 00:14:08,588
I don't know what's
got me feeling so woozy.
304
00:14:08,590 --> 00:14:10,457
I... I only ate a few berries
305
00:14:10,459 --> 00:14:12,459
to clear out the taste
of those funky mushrooms.
306
00:14:12,461 --> 00:14:16,162
Ah.
Fog's lifting a bit on that mystery.
307
00:14:16,164 --> 00:14:19,133
You just need to ride this out.
Breathe.
308
00:14:19,134 --> 00:14:23,295
Relax. Mother Nature...
will take care of you.
309
00:14:23,330 --> 00:14:25,672
I'm just stressed because
my friend and I are lost,
310
00:14:25,674 --> 00:14:27,941
and it could
tarnish my reputation.
311
00:14:27,943 --> 00:14:29,876
Reputations are tough, man.
312
00:14:29,878 --> 00:14:32,513
You know, every time people
see me, they're always like
313
00:14:32,514 --> 00:14:35,448
"Ah! A bear!
Run for your life! He'll eat us!"
314
00:14:35,450 --> 00:14:36,951
You know, I find that
a little presumptuous.
315
00:14:36,952 --> 00:14:38,619
Maybe I just want
to maul somebody.
316
00:14:38,620 --> 00:14:41,989
- You ever think of that?
- People are the worst.
317
00:14:41,990 --> 00:14:44,358
- What brought you out here, anyway?
- Oh, we're trying to find
318
00:14:44,359 --> 00:14:46,226
a coffee can we buried
when we were kids.
319
00:14:46,228 --> 00:14:49,813
Oh, I happen to know
that there's a coffee can
320
00:14:49,814 --> 00:14:52,566
buried up over that ridge,
just past that stump
321
00:14:52,567 --> 00:14:54,534
that looks like a pig
holding a toaster.
322
00:14:54,536 --> 00:14:57,538
Wow, that's very specific.
Thanks, Bear...
323
00:14:57,539 --> 00:15:01,108
- Oh, hey, any relation to Bear Grylls?
- Never heard of him.
324
00:15:01,109 --> 00:15:03,277
Oh, I just thought with
you having the same name...
325
00:15:03,278 --> 00:15:05,913
- My name's Gavin.
- Nice to meet ya, Gavin.
326
00:15:05,914 --> 00:15:08,515
So, uh, what are you doing out here?
327
00:15:08,517 --> 00:15:11,185
You ever hear the old saying
does a bear...
328
00:15:11,186 --> 00:15:14,187
- blank in the woods?
- You're Catholic?
329
00:15:14,355 --> 00:15:17,477
Oh, I've seen that commercial.
330
00:15:18,192 --> 00:15:19,493
Okay, quick, Emma's throwing.
331
00:15:19,494 --> 00:15:23,430
- Tell me all about this incident.
- Well, well, well,
332
00:15:23,432 --> 00:15:25,865
everyone wants to hear
about my incident.
333
00:15:25,867 --> 00:15:27,535
Yeah, yeah, just tell me.
334
00:15:27,536 --> 00:15:29,402
Maybe a man needs
to have some secrets.
335
00:15:29,404 --> 00:15:32,603
- Ever think of...
- No secrets. What happened?
336
00:15:32,638 --> 00:15:36,176
All right, I'll tell you.
It was a night much like tonight...
337
00:15:37,244 --> 00:15:40,046
...a friendly game of darts
between friends,
338
00:15:40,048 --> 00:15:41,748
or so I thought.
339
00:15:42,216 --> 00:15:46,252
- Yeah-ha-ha!
- Whoa!
340
00:15:48,656 --> 00:15:51,125
That's it?
You kicked a chair?
341
00:15:51,126 --> 00:15:53,694
That's the incident that
kept you out of Darts League?
342
00:15:53,695 --> 00:15:56,363
Haven't played that
game in 30 years.
343
00:15:56,365 --> 00:16:00,233
Maybe 15. Six?
When did they declassify Pluto?
344
00:16:00,235 --> 00:16:03,603
That's not an incident.
That's you being a sore loser.
345
00:16:03,605 --> 00:16:07,674
No, it's not. When I told Emma,
she said it was a big incident,
346
00:16:07,676 --> 00:16:10,878
- that I should never play again.
- Did she, now?
347
00:16:10,879 --> 00:16:12,846
Well, she just told me
348
00:16:12,848 --> 00:16:15,582
she thinks you should
come out of retirement.
349
00:16:15,584 --> 00:16:19,219
Ooh, I don't know.
I've closed that door.
350
00:16:19,221 --> 00:16:21,405
- Old wounds take a long...
- I'll buy you a beer.
351
00:16:21,406 --> 00:16:24,549
- Let's do this!
- You got any rope? No reason.
352
00:16:28,396 --> 00:16:31,232
- Brent! Wake up!
- Gah! Hank?
353
00:16:31,233 --> 00:16:33,744
- Gah! Are you okay, buddy?
- I wasn't...
354
00:16:33,745 --> 00:16:36,083
Untill I talked to the bear
with all the answers.
355
00:16:36,118 --> 00:16:38,639
Did you talk to a bear,
or did you eat a bear?
356
00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:41,642
- I'd never eat Gavin.
- Okay, you're scaring me.
357
00:16:41,643 --> 00:16:43,210
This is over.
I'm calling for help.
358
00:16:43,211 --> 00:16:45,111
Uh-oh, dead battery.
359
00:16:45,113 --> 00:16:48,548
That's what I get for watching
all those Friends re-runs.
360
00:16:48,550 --> 00:16:50,702
That Gunther should've
got more screen time.
361
00:16:50,737 --> 00:16:52,786
We have to find the pig
holding the toaster.
362
00:16:52,788 --> 00:16:55,822
How about we stay here and
wait for a monkey with a map?
363
00:16:55,824 --> 00:16:58,176
You're talking crazy.
Now, follow me.
364
00:16:58,224 --> 00:17:00,386
The moon is my monkey!
365
00:17:00,528 --> 00:17:01,695
You can't leave me out here.
366
00:17:01,696 --> 00:17:04,664
It's darker than Chandler's
sense of humour.
367
00:17:04,666 --> 00:17:07,066
Could I be any more scared?
368
00:17:08,102 --> 00:17:11,839
- Oh, good, it's your turn.
- Unfortunately, I...
369
00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:15,342
dislocated my thumb while...
peeing.
370
00:17:15,343 --> 00:17:18,412
- Ew. Also, how?
- Story for another day.
371
00:17:18,413 --> 00:17:20,014
Oscar is going to play for me.
372
00:17:20,015 --> 00:17:21,715
What? I'm not playing with him.
373
00:17:21,716 --> 00:17:23,850
Yeah, what about The Incident?
374
00:17:23,852 --> 00:17:27,620
If Karen can switch players,
I can switch players.
375
00:17:27,622 --> 00:17:29,322
Fire away, Oscar.
376
00:17:30,591 --> 00:17:32,911
Whoops, a little rusty.
377
00:17:34,128 --> 00:17:36,931
Ow!
I'm going home.
378
00:17:36,932 --> 00:17:39,654
Oscar is in for Davis.
379
00:17:39,689 --> 00:17:44,437
That stump didn't look
like a pig holding a toaster.
380
00:17:44,439 --> 00:17:46,539
More like a hog
holding a crockpot.
381
00:17:46,541 --> 00:17:50,844
- This is the tree!
- We're missing one key ingredient.
382
00:17:53,514 --> 00:17:59,118
- Okay, that's creepy/convenient.
- Monkey... moon.
383
00:18:01,622 --> 00:18:03,424
- Found it!
- The can!
384
00:18:03,425 --> 00:18:06,060
Ta-da...
C-C-Cigarettes?
385
00:18:06,061 --> 00:18:07,794
Who would've thought
it was cigarettes?
386
00:18:07,796 --> 00:18:09,662
I-I said it was cigarettes.
387
00:18:09,664 --> 00:18:12,633
I'd say, "in your face," but,
you know, we're probably both
388
00:18:12,634 --> 00:18:15,102
going to die out here,
so feels a little...
389
00:18:15,103 --> 00:18:17,337
Ah, what the hell.
In your face.
390
00:18:17,339 --> 00:18:19,939
I was wrong.
And I'm a fraud.
391
00:18:19,941 --> 00:18:22,642
We should've called for help
when we had the chance.
392
00:18:22,644 --> 00:18:25,912
Yeah, what does it matter now?
Want one?
393
00:18:29,451 --> 00:18:33,621
- Hey, you guys can't smoke here.
- See? We always get caught.
394
00:18:33,622 --> 00:18:37,358
- We're saved!
- You guys lost? Okay, don't panic.
395
00:18:37,359 --> 00:18:39,727
Breathe.
Relax.
396
00:18:39,728 --> 00:18:44,200
Mother Nature...
will kill you if you're not careful.
397
00:18:44,532 --> 00:18:46,533
Gavin?
398
00:18:48,769 --> 00:18:52,872
Ho ho!
Goodbye, rust, hello, gloating.
399
00:18:52,874 --> 00:18:55,676
Alriiight!
That's my champion!
400
00:18:55,677 --> 00:18:57,377
- Let's see you match that.
- Hmm.
401
00:18:58,879 --> 00:19:03,117
- Give me a tough one.
- Trick shot! Phil, pull!
402
00:19:08,522 --> 00:19:12,492
- Ha ha!
- Ugh, gross, but okay, Phil, pull!
403
00:19:14,762 --> 00:19:16,462
Ugh.
404
00:19:16,630 --> 00:19:20,067
Ha! I find it helps if you
keep your eye on the target.
405
00:19:20,068 --> 00:19:22,703
- Isn't she your partner?
- Still not a fan.
406
00:19:22,704 --> 00:19:27,240
Dammit, Oscar, you got in my head
through this egg via my mouth.
407
00:19:27,242 --> 00:19:29,944
We're tied!
Last shot, Oscar.
408
00:19:29,945 --> 00:19:33,181
This one's for all the marbles.
409
00:19:33,414 --> 00:19:35,082
Do you hear something
in the ceiling?
410
00:19:35,083 --> 00:19:38,551
Yeah, like raccoons
or a poltergeist.
411
00:19:38,553 --> 00:19:41,196
Those are your two options?
412
00:19:42,289 --> 00:19:44,279
- Hey, what?
- What?
413
00:19:44,314 --> 00:19:48,494
Ha ha ha!
You fools, I warned you that if...
414
00:19:48,496 --> 00:19:50,196
Ow!
415
00:19:50,598 --> 00:19:52,865
Ooh, that hurt.
416
00:19:52,867 --> 00:19:54,801
Wanda? What the hell?
417
00:19:54,803 --> 00:19:58,171
There's no darts league
if there's no dart board.
418
00:19:58,173 --> 00:20:02,442
Ha ha!
Away!
419
00:20:02,444 --> 00:20:07,046
- Ugh...
- But did you have to rappel down?
420
00:20:07,048 --> 00:20:08,616
Couldn't you have just run up
421
00:20:08,617 --> 00:20:09,917
and taken it
when the lights went out?
422
00:20:09,918 --> 00:20:11,752
Run in the dark?
Are you nuts?
423
00:20:11,753 --> 00:20:15,688
Could've broken my neck.
Away!
424
00:20:15,690 --> 00:20:19,777
- Ha...
- Last call.
425
00:20:22,411 --> 00:20:23,546
So, I'm confused.
426
00:20:23,547 --> 00:20:25,915
Who's cleaning the fridge,
you or Davis?
427
00:20:25,916 --> 00:20:28,416
Since neither of us lost,
we only have one choice.
428
00:20:28,418 --> 00:20:30,620
- You're cleaning it together?
- Gross.
429
00:20:30,621 --> 00:20:32,988
No, we're buying a new fridge.
430
00:20:32,990 --> 00:20:34,624
You can stop worrying, everybody.
431
00:20:34,625 --> 00:20:36,691
I got Brent out of the woods.
432
00:20:36,693 --> 00:20:39,962
This is darts night?
Doesn't look safe.
433
00:20:40,797 --> 00:20:44,615
It's not safe. As league
commissioner, I forbid this.
434
00:20:44,650 --> 00:20:47,791
This isn't league activity.
Ha ha!
435
00:20:47,826 --> 00:20:51,174
This is me and Miss Priss seeing
who's best at hitting a moving target.
436
00:20:51,175 --> 00:20:53,842
Phil, pull!
Or push.
437
00:20:54,277 --> 00:20:57,728
- Not cool.
- Why were you guys in the woods?
438
00:20:57,763 --> 00:21:00,752
There was an incident.
439
00:21:01,053 --> 00:21:03,712
Have you been smoking?
440
00:21:08,593 --> 00:21:10,028
♪ I don't know ♪
441
00:21:10,029 --> 00:21:12,963
♪ The same things
you don't know ♪
442
00:21:16,334 --> 00:21:18,301
♪ I don't know ♪
443
00:21:18,303 --> 00:21:21,505
♪ I just... don't know ♪
444
00:21:23,484 --> 00:21:27,387
- ♪ Ooh ♪
- ♪ It's a great big place ♪
445
00:21:27,389 --> 00:21:31,158
- ♪ Ooh ♪
- ♪ Full of nothin' but space ♪
446
00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:34,961
- ♪ Ooh ♪
- ♪ And it's my happy place ♪
447
00:21:34,963 --> 00:21:37,564
♪ I don't know ♪
448
00:21:38,709 --> 00:21:41,363
sync & correction by f1nc0
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