Original subtitles

♪ The Wind in the Willows

♪ Sang softly to me

♪ Follow my voice

♪ Wherever it leads

♪ From mountains, through valleys

♪ To deep rolling seas

♪ Born on the wings of the breeze ♪

There was no doubt about.

The year had turned the corner towards summer.

It had been a glorious spring day.

Bracken was unwinding like clock springs.

Dandelions lit up the meadows as if switched on

and the bees bustled and shouldered their way

into the not quite open cowslips in the shade of the hedgerows.

Even Badger had been roused by it,

had picnicked with Ratty, Mole and Toad

and had let them row along the shimmering river to Toad Hall

while he strolled along its banks.

Having worked up an appetite

in the pursuit of nothing in particular,

they sat back contentedly,

surrounded by the creamy, sugary,

buttery, crumby, jammy evidence of afternoon tea at Toad Hall.

You performed jolly well on the river, Toad.

- Yes, well, I am... - Only losing the one oar!

Yes, oh, I say!

My goodness, Toad! What a handsome home this is!

Oh, yes. It's not a bad old place.

For somewhere above ground.

It's so grand. And historical. All those ancestors!

Hmm, yes. Mind you, I think there's something missing.

- Missing, Toad? - It could do with an addition.

- I'm sorry, Toad? - Something new.

Now, then, Toad, I promised your dear father

that I wouldn't let you knock this place about.

Knock it about?

Knock it about? Ho ho ho! No, no, Badger!

I mean there's something missing from the walls.

A pair of crossed oars would look rather splendid.

Or in your case, just the one.

Huh? No, no, no, no. I mean a portrait.

A portrait, Toad? Whose portrait?

Whose por...? Tsk! Whose por...?

Well, mine, of course!

Yours, Toad?

Yes. All the other famous toads are up there.

And I expect I'm much more famous than any of them!

- Or at least notorious! - Ahem!

I think Toad's right. He ought to be up there with the others.

He is a toad as much as any of them.

Yes, Mole, you're right.

Where would you get one?

Now... Hmm... Ah.

Well, er...

Why couldn't Badger do it? Badger paints beautifully.

Nonsense! A dabbler.

Badger, you know you do.

- Yes. Paint? - Sorry, Toad?

I know Badger's a genius with a brush and all that.

Eh?

But it's just that I am...

not that it's any credit, you know, to me,

it's just a gift of nature that I'm unusually... handsome.

I just wouldn't like any detail, you see, to be lost.

It wouldn't be fair to my successors.

A loss of detail would be an advantage!

Yes... I say!

If you want to capture your features perfectly, Toad,

perhaps you should have a photographic study.

Good idea. You've seen Badger's photographs.

That's not quite the thing for a gentleman's portrait.

Perhaps, but my cousin Auberon had his likeness photographed.

It's very fashionable, all the rage.

Very fashionable? All the rage?

- Ssh, man! - All the rage.

Oh!

All the rage!

All... the... rage!

Oh, no!

Of course, I wouldn't want an old half-plate camera!

Though I'm sure yours is very good, Badger.

Oh, dear.

No, I shall have the very latest, erm, whole-plate camera!

- And I'll have side plates too. - Oh!

Yes. First thing in the morning I'll motor into London.

Look here, Toad!

And get myself a camera or two

and all the other, erm, the bits and the pieces!

It's no use. He's off again. It's another craze.

It's all my fault.

If it isn't photography, it's something else.

Foolish creature!

It'll be like a fever now. Just let it burn itself out.

- Oh, dear, oh, dear. - My house! Myself!

They'll beg for my masterpieces in the Royal Academy.

Ha ha ha! Click! Smile, please! Click, click! Click, click!

First thing next morning,

Toad was off to a New Bond Street shop

in the West End of London.

Photography's the only thing!

But it was three or four days later,

three or four days which seemed like weeks to Toad,

before there was a knocking on the front door of Toad Hall.

I'm coming, I'm coming!

- Mr Toad? - Yes, that's me.

Packages for you. Sign here, please.

Oh, yes.

Oh, yes, thank you.

Oh, thank YOU, gov.

- Ta-ra! - Ta-ra!

Ta-ra?

Good morning!

Now then!

Oh! Ah! That's, erm...

Click, click!

Click, click!

Hmm. Oh, ha! Hello, what's this?

"Dear Sir, thank you for your esteemed order

"which we have pleasure in... blah-blah-blah...

"total price of 18 guineas.

"Please accept with our compliments

"a useful book which we hope will be..."

Book? Where is the book? Oh!

What's this?

"Photography for Novices.

"The Primus Handbook by Reverend FT Lambert, MA, FRPS.

"Price - one shilling net." What?

"Photography for Novices"?

Novices?

I shall be a fellow of the Royal...

Photographical Society by the end of the week.

Novices indeed! Oh!

Now...

Where to begin my breathtaking career?

Oh, bother!

Ah! Now, now...

Right there, and we'll just...

I think I've...

Now, this way.

If I can just...

Why is it just...? Why is everything...?

Oh, drat!

Ah, now, hello.

Where... where am I?

Useless! Stupid shopkeeper! The picture's upside down!

Junk! Absolute junk!

Now, where's the other one?

Oh!

Cor! Another broken camera!

Good job some of us have intelligence!

Now, then...

Ah! Oh! Hello?

Got it! Got it!

Cor! Click, click!

Yes. Yes, thank you.

A little... A little more to the left.

No, no, the other left. That's it, thank you.

Yes, yes, that's right. Hold it.

Hold it there. Yes.

Look, Toad, I can't hang about much longer.

Perfection, my dear Rat, takes time.

As I'm sure Badger's old father must have said.

Oh!

Hmm? What?

Drat, this... Oh!

Confounded contraption, it really is!

Erm, a slight tilt of the head perhaps?

I can't quite get you and your nice little home in

at the same time,

so I'll just move back a little and see if...

T-T-Toad!

Ratty, I won't be a minute! A little further...

- Toad! Toad! - Please, Ratty!

You're disturbing my...

Oh, dear. I think I'd better pop up to town in the morning.

Coming, coming!

Hey!

Hey, hey!

Now, Moley, old man...

Oh, dear, Toad, I'd really rather not. My little home...

Oh, nonsense!

I shall make it famous.

"See Mole's humble residence,

"as photographed by Toad."

- But I'm getting dinner ready. - It's a bit dark in here.

Hang on while I set up the, er, flash thingy.

Now!

I can't breathe!

And I've got them all in order,

so you can enjoy them properly.

- Have they come out well, Toad? - Come out? Come out?

Of course they'll have come out well!

- The one of me at Mole End? - It'll be wonderful.

- I know it will. - Toad!

When I take a photograph... Yes, Badger?

You have looked at these slides of yours?

Ha ha! Have I looked...?

Oh!

- Actually, no. - But Toad!

What's the point? I mean, I know how good they are!

And I didn't want to spoil the absolute thrill

of seeing my creative genius

writ large upon the shimmering screen.

My word, Toad, you have got it bad!

Yes. Well, better get on with it then.

- Oh, yes. - Too right!

Here we are, Badger. The slides.

Hmm. Thank you.

- Are you all comfortable? - Yes, thank you, Toad.

You can see the screen all right?

Yes, thank you, Toad.

- I wouldn't like you to miss... - Toad!

Yes, Badger? Oh, oh, yes, Badger.

- We shall commence. - Er, yes.

Ahem| Yes.

Well, the first one is the stately facade of Toad Hall.

Thank you, Badger.

- Badger? - That, Toad, is it.

- It? - Hmm.

You didn't, by any chance, leave the lens cap on?

Lens cap? Lens cap...

Oh, so that's what it...

No! No, no, of course not.

It's, erm...

This, of course, is an experimental photograph.

Toad Hall by night!

Thank you. Now, the next one is a self-portrait.

I fancy this will look handsome on the wall there.

Thank you, Badger.

Yes, yes.

- There! - Oh!

Yes, Toad, as handsome as |I've ever seen you.

- Ha ha ha ha! - Mole!

I say, Mole!

I'm sorry, Toad!

Yes, well... It was just... It was just a try-out.

This next one is the one that I meant.

Oh, jolly good, Toad!

We only need the top of your head and we've got the set!

Those wretched developing people have done them wrong!

Nonsense, Toad!

Next?

Well... Well, it's, erm...

It's one I took of Rat in his boat.

Well, he's... just off to the right.

A wonderful sense of movement, don't you think?

- Mole, I wish you'd stop that! - Next?

Badger... Badger, how about...?

Next!

Oh, go on then.

Oh, look!

Oh!

What?

And that, Toad, is the last of your...

masterpieces.

Oh! Oh, not one!

No landscapes, no riverscapes.

- And no portrait of me! - Oh, that is a pity.

You haven't any photographs you can show us, Badger?

Didn't you take some at Toad Hall?

Well, yes. Yes, I do have one or two if you'd care to see 'em.

Only taken with my old camera, of course!

Yes, I think there may be one of you, Toad.

Oh, good.

Looking pretty dashing and handsome, am I?

Well, it certainly looks like you.

Don't keep us in suspense.

Absolutely not!

Oh. Oh, very well.

There!

Oh, I say!

Really! You might be more sympathetic!

Oh, I say!

You, er...

You won't miss my dimple, will you?

- Toad! - All right.

"Vanity will prove vexation,” my old father used to say.

And by Jove, he was right!

Oh, my, it's ever so good!

I can only paint walls,

but imagine being a Rembrandt or Tintoretto or Gainsborough!

- Mole! - One would be so famous.

Everyone wanting you to paint!

- Mole! - Eh? Famous?

Toad!

I think I might take a little trip to town this afternoon.

Toad!

Of course, I'd need a bigger easel.

Oh, Toad!

And a very big box of paints.

And I'll have hundreds and thousands of brushes!

♪ Spin me a dream

♪ Woven silver and gold

♪ From sunshine and shadows

♪ And days long ago

♪ Where people are memories

♪ And stories unfold

♪ Willows

♪ The tales you have told me

♪ Wind in the Willows

♪ You just seem to know

♪ Who you can tum to

♪ And which way to go

♪ To unwind your wondrous mind

♪ Wind in the Willows

♪ Take me there ♪