Original subtitles

* Good Times *

* Anytime You meet a payment *

* Good Times *

* Anytime You feel free *

* Good Times *

* Anytime you're Out from under *

* Not getting hassled Not getting hustled *

* Keeping your head Above water *

* Making a wave when you can *

* Temporary layoffs *

* Good Times *

* Easy credit Rip-offs *

* Good Times *

* Scratching And surviving *

* Good Times *

* Hanging in A chow line *

* Good Times *

* Ain't we lucky we got 'em *

* Good Times *

Voilà!

And there goes the K, and the ebony genius

has won another grueling game of Scrabble!

Hey, hold on a minute, J.J.,

there's no such word as a "snerk."

Ah, yes, it is, Michael. It's a ferocious flea.

Whoever heard of a dog having snerks?

Michael, they don't get on dogs.

Snerks are from Africa. They only get on gorillas,

and nobody tries to knock them off.

J.J., you're just making that up.

Hey, brother, check it out, check it out.

I will.

Well, let me take down here, and take a well-deserved rest.

Oh, no, you don't. Will you get off the couch?

Ma, make him get up!

All right, J.J., get up.

Thelma's friends'll be here soon,

and the one thing this couch don't need

is a bony cushion.

But, Ma, I was just about to meditate,

to experience a growth of consciousness.

If you don't get up,

you're gonna experience a growth of knots.

Yeah? Is that a threat?

No, that's a promise. Your face is a threat.

Get up!

You got some nerve, with that old face you call--

You better get up!

All right, all right!

You two, squash it!

J.J., I said, get up.

Aw, Ma, how come her Black Student Union

got to meet here?

You know, this ain't no union hall.

It ain't no concert hall, either.

So quit singing the blues and get your butt up.

Well, J.J., I was right.

I looked, and I couldn't find any such word as a "snerk."

And you know why, Michael?

I'll tell you why.

Because you're looking in the old dictionary.

A snerk is one of them new fleas

in one of them new African countries.

Michael, one of the guys who's coming to the meeting

is from Africa,

and you can ask him about J.J.'s weirdo flea.

You mean, a real African from Africa

is gonna be here this afternoon?

Mm-hmm. All right.

Oh, Thelma, that sounds exciting.

I can hardly wait to meet him.

Well, you might not like meeting him, Ma.

He is the world's greatest male chauvinist.

Hi, y'all.

ALL: Hi, Willona!

How you doing? Thelma, here's the dip for the meeting.

Willona, you didn't have to go to the trouble to make this.

Honey, I didn't. I bought that from the store.

The last dip I made was like quicksand.

The Fritos wouldn't go in there without life jackets.

Well, you've made this look like a training table

for the Chicago Bears.

Don't you have to feed the entire Black Student Union?

No. This is a meeting with the action committee.

We're supposed to try to change some of the conditions

in the cafeteria. Oh...

Hold on, Thelma.

You mean, all the injustices

black people are suffering throughout the world,

and you turkeys are starting a revolution in the cafeteria?

Michael, three students got ptomaine poisoning.

Wow, that sounds like my old lunchroom.

There was always something brown in the soup.

It tasted terrible, but did a heck of a backstroke.

Well, every Friday

they serve us leftovers from the whole week,

ground up, burned up,

and covered up with some lumpy sauce.

Now, watch your mouth.

That's what I'm making for dinner tonight.

Willona...

Thelma, have you complained to anybody about this?

Yeah, we tried complaining to the dean,

but his assistant blocked us.

He said, "Students are in school to learn, not to eat."

That's funny.

Lunch was always my best subject.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

I got it.

Hi, Thelma.

Oh, hi, Ibe. Come on in.

Let me take your coat.

Everybody, this is one of the members

of the Black Student Union, Ibe Wubila.

Ibe, this is my mother...

Hello, Ibe.

And my brothers, Michael and J.J.,

and our best friend, Willona Woods.

I'm delighted to meet everyone,

especially the lovely ladies.

Um, are you the one from Africa?

Yes, I am.

Habari gani.

What?

Habari gani.

Um, that's Swahili for, "What's happening?"

Didn't you know that?

[CHUCKLING]

Swahili is spoken mostly in East Africa, Michael.

I'm from Nigeria, and that's in West Africa,

and our official language is English.

Well, uh, why don't we all just sit down.

Ibe...

Thank you.

Well, look here, Ibe, my man.

With all that warm, colorful climate you got there

in Nigeria,

why'd you leave there to come to the cold,

dull climate of Chicago?

My father owns a textile plant.

I'm here taking an advanced business course,

so I can learn how to run it more efficiently.

He's working on his Master's degree.

I hope you don't mind my saying this,

but you are two of the most beautiful women

I have seen in America since I've been here.

Well...

How can we mind you telling it like it is?

[LAUGHING]

If that's chauvinism,

I don't mind being chauved.

And you, Mrs. Evans...

Yes?

You have the same graceful features as my mother

and other elegant women of my tribe.

Oh, thank you, Ibe.

I'm very flattered.

Hey, Ma, maybe you have some ancestors

from Nigeria.

You know, come to think of it,

there was an uncle

on my mother's side in Georgia

whose father lived in Tennessee,

but whose grandmother came from Virginia--

Excuse me for interrupting

the Evans version of Roots,

but I've got to run. I'll see you later.

Nice to have met you, Ibe.

The pleasure was all mine.

Whoo, honey!

If all the men in Africa are as suave as you,

I am ready to pack up and scram on the next Pan Am. Whoo!

Ibe, have you ever heard of an African insect

called a snerk?

A what?

Michael, don't bother this man with small, petty questions.

Childish questions. [KNOCK ON DOOR]

Childish.

Hi.

Oh, Valerie, Richard.

Come on in. Take off your coats.

Hi, Thelma. How are you doing?

Yeah. That's my mother.

VALERIE: Hello, Mrs. Evans.

Hello. I'm delighted to meet you both.

Well, Thelma, I'm going to my room,

but if you need any help, just yell.

Okay, Ma, and this is my brother Michael...

Hey, what's happening? And my brother--

And I'm her brother James.

Better known as the Dr. J. of Love.

What do you say me and you fast break down the court

and go for a game of one on one?

Why don't you take your game to the hoop

and stuff it?

Hey, Michael, I may have missed a shot,

but I'm in perfect position for the offensive rebound.

Well, ordinarily I'd stay and listen, Thelma,

but I gotta meet somebody at the library.

Nice meeting y'all.

All right, everybody, let's sit down and start the meeting.

Good. I'm ready to go to war.

Swallowing that cafeteria food is like eating a live grenade.

Uh, J.J., don't you have someplace to go?

Oh, don't worry about me, Thelma,

you won't even know I'm in the room.

Quiet as a little mouse.

So let us begin the meeting.

Well, you know, the first move I think we ought to make--

J.J.!

Pardon moi.

Thelma, you have a very strange brother.

Okay, now who's gonna keep the minutes?

Uh, that should be either you or Valerie.

Now, I have a plan that--

Well, hey, wait. Wait a minute, Ibe.

Wait a minute!

What do you mean,

it should be either me or Valerie?

Well, keeping minutes is secretarial work.

In my country, that's woman's work.

[LAUGHING]

Yeah, but you're not in your country,

you in this country,

and that woman's work stuff is dead.

Thank you, Thelma.

We ain't here to fight each other.

The enemy is the cafeteria.

He's right, and what we have to do is speak to that dean,

and the way it looks, that's not about to happen--

It can happen if we hold a demonstration.

Right!

We sneak down to the cafeteria after dark

and blow that sucker up!

Richard, we wanna change the cafeteria,

we don't wanna destroy it.

Oh...

Well, destroying it definitely will change it.

Thank you, brother.

Oh, come on, Richard. That's dumb.

Nobody's going for that.

Hey, I know what we could do. We can hold a boycott.

And we can picket outside until we get some results.

Yeah, and I'll paint the signs.

J.J., are you a sign painter?

Look here, Mama, I'm a master sign painter.

Matter of fact, I've just been struck with a vision.

I can see it now...

A gigantic deceased fly, laying straight on his back,

legs stiff as a board,

with a caption underneath reading,

"I ate in the school cafeteria."

J.J., that is very heavy.

Ah, you know what they say, Mama.

Some of us are blessed, and the rest flunk the test.

Well, that's a D-minus for you...clown.

So, all in favor of a boycott?

Aye. Aye.

Not me!

Boycotts are passive!

We've gotta do something more aggressive!

All right, then.

While we're outside picketing,

you go inside, and you punch out the Jell-O.

Listen, since we are agreed to boycott,

we must choose a spokesman to handle the media.

Okay.

Thelma organized this committee, so I nominate her.

Oh, no, that won't work. Thelma is a woman.

So what?

So a spokesman is also a leader,

and only men were meant to lead.

Oh, yeah?

Well, somebody better lead you back to the jungle!

Well, it's obvious

that a woman's tongue gets more usage than her brain.

[INAUDIBLE]

Man, we're gonna get it on now!

That's beautiful, brother!

Thelma, is everything all right?

I thought I heard some commotion.

No, Ma, everything's fine.

We just had a little minor disagreement, here.

Okay, now, everybody. Why don't you go and eat.

The food is right there on the table.

Enjoy yourselves.

That was beautiful, brother.

Where'd you get that from, Kipling?

Thelma, did you decide what to do about the cafeteria?

Uh-huh, we're gonna boycott, Ma.

Boycott?

Now, Thelma, I don't want you to do anything

that's gonna jeopardize your scholarship.

Ma, don't worry, most of us are there on scholarships.

So it's gonna be very, very peaceful.

Oh, honey, I know how important your boycott is,

but you must remember

that there are more important things at stake.

Thelma...

What do you want?

I-I want to apologize.

It's very difficult for a man to go to another country,

and not to take his customs and values with him.

Hmm, tell me all about it.

Valerie's right.

You've organized this committee,

and you'd be a very good spokeswoman.

Spokesperson.

Ah, spokesperson.

Please accept my apology for making you angry.

Okay, I accept.

I guess I have a little apologizing to do too

about that jungle remark.

I'm sorry.

Listen, we all say things that we don't mean

when we're provoked.

So let's eat, shall we?

Ladies first.

Persons first.

ALL: Save our stomachs!

Save our stomachs!

Hey, Thelma!

Thelma, this boycott is really working!

How about that?

Even the roaches stayed out.

The dean'll have to talk to us now!

Hey, hold it, hold it, hold it.

Our time may have come.

His assistant, Mr. Rogers, is heading this way.

Well, well, well.

I suppose there's a leader to this little insurrection.

Uh, yes.

I'm Thelma Evans, spokesperson for the cafeteria boycott.

Well, Miss Evans, spokesperson,

I've been ordered by the dean to tell you and your comrades

to end this little demonstration now.

Well, we're not gonna stop picketing

until the dean hears our grievances.

[PROTESTERS CLAMORING] That's not about to happen.

Why won't the dean talk with us?

Because there's nothing to talk about.

Now, either you pack up your little signs and move out,

or I'll have the campus police clear you out.

One of them suckers put his hands on me,

he'll draw back a nub.

[LAUGHING AND SHOUTING]

Hey, we're not breaking any laws

by picketing, y'all.

Come on, let's keep on marching.

PROTESTERS: Save our stomachs! Save our stomachs!

For the last time, end this demonstration now!

Looky here, Mr. Boss Man,

you run on up to the big house

and tell Master we said, "No way!"

Now, that's enough out of you,

and don't you talk to me like that.

I'm the assistant dean.

You act more like the assistant fool.

And who said that?

Your mama!

[LAUGHING AND CHEERING]

That did it!

Now, I'm taking all of your names,

and I'm putting this insubordination on your records.

Well, that's what you'd expect from a stupid Uncle Tom.

I heard you, Miss Evans.

I heard you.

Now, you are suspended from this university,

right here and now! WOMAN: What?

Now, how do you like that from your Uncle Tom?

Hey, Thelma, smile it up.

[GIBBERING]

Oh, J.J....

Hey, come on, Thelma.

Let me tell you something from the bottom of my heart.

The last few weeks,

you've been a bigger drag than usual,

all because you got kicked out of school.

I mean, what's the big deal?

It happened to Einstein, Edison,

and if you can believe this, even me.

You didn't see me walking around

with my face all wrinkled up,

like some old, tired prune.

J.J., that's because your face was already wrinkled up

like some old, tired prune.

Thelma, come back here.

Ma, I know what you're gonna say.

Well, listen anyway.

Now, your counselor and I just had a long talk,

and according to her,

you can get back in school any time you want.

Any time I want to do it their way.

What does that mean?

She says you just have to apologize to Mr. Rogers

and sign a statement

that you won't take part in any more demonstrations.

That's asking me to go to school and not react to anything,

like some kind of zombie!

Hey, I zombied in school for four years.

It worked for me.

J.J., this is serious.

Thelma, your scholarship is at stake.

Ma, I'd rather lose the scholarship

than have them take away my freedom of speech

and right to protest!

Well, Ma, I agree with Thelma.

If you don't stand for something,

you'll fall for anything.

Standing for principles is fine,

but Thelma is jeopardizing her whole future.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Well, my sister the martyr.

The French had Joan of Arc, and we got Thelma of the Ghetto.

Hey.

Come on in, bro.

Good evening, Mrs. Evans.

Hello, Ibe.

You look troubled.

I'm fine, Ibe.

It's Thelma who has the problem.

She's suffering from a hardening of the head.

You know, she still won't do anything

to get herself back into school.

I wish I could say something to help, Mrs. Evans,

but I've been suspended from the university too.

What?

Well, sounds like they're having

a spring clearance sale on blacks,

both domestic and imported.

Ibe, why were you suspended?

Was it because of the demonstrations?

Oh, not really, Mrs. Evans.

This morning we met with the dean

to air our complaint,

and somehow, Thelma's suspension came up.

He and I began to argue

over the terms of her reinstatement.

Well, he called it fair,

and became offended when I questioned his ancestry.

Well, Ibe got down!

Ibe, you were suspended because of me?

I only spoke out for what was fair, Thelma.

I'm a man of principle.

Principles are becoming as contagious around here

as the mumps.

But I can't let it go at that. I've gotta thank you somehow.

Well, if you feel that way about it,

you can thank me by having dinner with me this evening.

Dinner?

Good. I'll pick you up at 7:00.

Hey, wait a minute. What if I say "No"?

Well, in that case, I'll pick you up at 6:30.

Oh, now, that was nothing.

Now, the big shock came when Fanny found out

that that plum-red lipstick on her husband's shirt

was his very own.

You know what I mean?

Flo?

Florida Evans, where are you?

Oh, I'm sorry, Willona.

I just can't quit thinking about Thelma.

You know, she still wouldn't do what they asked her to do

to get herself back into school.

She's going lose that scholarship for sure.

Well, she hasn't lost it yet.

She could still change her mind.

Her mind is the big problem.

All she's got on it is Ibe.

Well, honey, I can't hardly blame her.

Ooh, child, he is so fine.

He could charm the pants off of anybody.

What?

Uh, well-- Well, what I mean is,

he's really got his act together.

Oh, don't get me wrong. I trust Thelma.

What bothers me

is how fast her head is spinning over that man.

Flowers for the beautiful young ladies.

Oh, flowers for me? J.J., you shouldn't have.

Oh, no, no. Whose are they?

These are for Thelma.

I got them downstairs, from the delivery man.

Well, how come he didn't deliver them?

Fear. He says every time he comes to this neighborhood,

he doesn't know whether

he's going to be delivering roses

or pushing up daisies.

Well, I wonder who they're from.

Uh, they're from Ibe,

and wait till y'all read this note.

Hot! Whoo!

Oh, J.J., that card was for Thelma.

Now, you had absolutely no business reading it.

Your mother's absolutely right.

You're just too nosy for your own good.

What does it say? What does it say?

Well, due to my new-found respect for Thelma's privacy,

my lips are sealed.

Hi, everybody!

Hi.

Uh, how do you like my new hairdo?

Oh, Thelma, honey,

it's lovely.

You like it?

Oh, yes.

It's beautiful, honey.

A friend of Ibe's did it for me.

Girl, looks like your scalp is sprouting black spaghetti.

J.J., you have about as much class...

Ooh, flowers! Whose flowers?

They're yours.

Roses! They're beautiful.

I wonder what this card says.

Uh, "Thelma, may your dancing eyes

always shine like they did last night..."

J.J.!

"When I held you tightly in my arms."

You are just too nosy.

I swear, you are so nosy!

Come on, baby. We have got to have a talk.

Flo, Flo.

It's all right. Take it easy.

Ma, you're right.

There is something you should know.

What is it? What!

I'm thinking about changing my name.

You can't. "Godzilla's" already taken.

Well, which name are you changing,

your first or your last?

Both.

I'm thinking of taking an African name,

Bisa Akua.

"Bisa" means "greatly loved"

and "Akua" means "sweet messenger."

I get the message, all right,

and I think this African number has gone too far.

Now, I like Ibe, and I respect his tradition,

but you're getting carried away

because he was suspended from school sticking up for you.

Ma, I'm not getting carried away.

Then how come your eyes are shining and dancing?

Oh, Ma, you know guys.

They'll say anything.

She's got that right, honey.

Most of the dudes I date

talk enough trash to fill two Hefty bags.

You're right.

I suppose if there were really anything to their relationship,

she would say so.

With a smile as big as Jimmy Carter's.

I mean, Thelma is a level-headed girl.

She wouldn't get involved without telling me.

You would know it before he would.

And like you said, it's just a novelty that'll wear off.

Quicker than a pet rock.

So I really don't have anything to worry about.

That's what I keep telling you.

So why the hell am I worried?

Mm, you're delicious.

Well, that's what they say about brown sugar.

You know, the last few weeks I've spent with you

have been unlike any I've spent before.

Well, I can dig that.

I mean it.

In my country, you would be a queen.

Mm-mm. In your country, a position that important

could only be held by a man.

No.

In our constitution, the queen's position

is clearly defined as woman's work.

Oh, it's funny that we can joke about that.

Just a few weeks ago,

we were at each other's throats.

Now look at us.

Oh, I'd rather look at you.

Go ahead. I don't mind.

Thelma...I love you.

I thought you would never say that.

Then you knew?

No, I hoped, because I love you too.

Oh, Thelma, Thelma.

Oh...

I don't know how I could live without you.

I want to see you, touch you, adore you all the time.

Oh, Ibe, I feel the same way.

Thelma... I want us to live together.

Live together?

Yes, I want to be with you all day and all night.

Oh, Ibe...

um...

Living together.

Whoo, that-- That's a-- That's a big step.

I-- You know--

I mean, d-don't you love me, Thelma?

Oh, I love you, Ibe, but it-- It's like--

You know, I, uh--

But-- But all we need

is just to share our mutual love together.

Well, I-- I-- It's not like that--

Thelma, please, say you love me.

Oh, Ibe. I--

Please, please, please.

I love you, but I--

Oh, Ibe.

Yes, yes, yes!

Yes.

Oh, it's going to be fantastic.

You know, in my country, we have a saying--

"When a man and a woman love as one,

they cast a mighty shadow on eternity."

Well, in my country, we have a saying too.

When Ma hears about me and my shadow...

the grits are gonna hit the pan.

* Mmm... *

* Just looking Out of the window *

* Watching the asphalt grow *

* Thinking how It all looks hand-me-down *

* Good Times * * Yeah, yeah *

* Good Times *

* Keeping your head Above water *

* Making a wave when you can *

* Temporary layoffs *

* Good Times *

* Easy credit rip-offs *

* Good Times *

ANNOUNCER: Good Times is videotaped in front of a studio audience.

* Good Times *