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1
00:00:02,035 --> 00:00:05,198
Dr. Reid, I know yoga is supposed
to be good for pregnant women,
2
00:00:05,238 --> 00:00:07,138
but are you sure this is okay?
3
00:00:07,173 --> 00:00:09,903
It looks like that baby
could squirt out any second.
4
00:00:09,943 --> 00:00:13,845
Lucy, I'm fine. Besides,
I would never give birth under a tree.
5
00:00:13,880 --> 00:00:16,815
Although J.D. And I
did conceive this baby under one.
6
00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:20,308
It was a Christmas tree.
Not in our house. It was still on the lot.
7
00:00:20,353 --> 00:00:23,015
We made a bunch of Christians
uncomfortable that day.
8
00:00:23,056 --> 00:00:27,584
- I once got felt up in a pumpkin patch.
- Don't you just love the holidays?
9
00:00:27,994 --> 00:00:30,428
It's so nice having someone to talk to.
10
00:00:30,463 --> 00:00:32,624
I feel like I can't go
to the other med students.
11
00:00:32,665 --> 00:00:36,123
It's gotten so cutthroat.
People will do anything to get ahead.
12
00:00:38,171 --> 00:00:41,265
Lost got canceled
and they're never gonna air the finale?
13
00:00:41,307 --> 00:00:44,765
So many questions.
Hey, good luck on the test, bro.
14
00:00:47,013 --> 00:00:50,107
Even Drew's been acting
like a gunner recently.
15
00:00:50,216 --> 00:00:52,946
Drew, can I borrow
your histology notes?
16
00:00:53,253 --> 00:00:55,619
Roger, no. Nothing personal,
17
00:00:55,655 --> 00:00:58,146
I just don't want to help you
half-ass your way through med school
18
00:00:58,191 --> 00:00:59,522
and keep you from your true destiny,
19
00:00:59,559 --> 00:01:01,220
which is to become
the second-best dentist
20
00:01:01,261 --> 00:01:04,025
at a run-down strip mall. You get it.
21
00:01:06,199 --> 00:01:09,134
I was a gunner for a while
when I was in med school.
22
00:01:09,169 --> 00:01:10,830
Once I set my roommate Lauren's
books on fire
23
00:01:10,870 --> 00:01:13,168
so she couldn't study.
Turns out I'd loaned her mine,
24
00:01:13,206 --> 00:01:15,766
so I actually had to buy
a whole new set, which she then stole.
25
00:01:15,809 --> 00:01:18,869
Still, in the end I won
because she got hit by a truck.
26
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:20,402
I mean, she didn't die,
27
00:01:20,447 --> 00:01:23,507
but she is not smart enough
to be a doctor anymore.
28
00:01:23,550 --> 00:01:25,040
Is she happy?
29
00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:27,409
- Oh, she's very happy.
- Good.
30
00:01:29,255 --> 00:01:30,347
Now, to recap,
31
00:01:30,390 --> 00:01:34,019
what is the number-one attribute
all med students share
32
00:01:34,060 --> 00:01:35,823
with this skeleton?
33
00:01:36,496 --> 00:01:37,520
Yes.
34
00:01:37,564 --> 00:01:40,692
The hollow area of nothingness
inside the skull?
35
00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:43,998
Exactly. Now, it is time
for a boring announcement
36
00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:46,972
about a pointless tradition
brought to you by an empty figurehead
37
00:01:47,006 --> 00:01:49,998
with a failing liver
and an overactive libido.
38
00:01:50,043 --> 00:01:53,137
Thank you, Perry,
you anger-filled muscle slut.
39
00:01:53,413 --> 00:01:55,904
- I miss this.
- Yeah, me, too.
40
00:01:56,449 --> 00:01:58,144
Kills me that we're friends now.
41
00:01:58,184 --> 00:02:02,678
All right. As you know, Friday
is the annual White Coat Ceremony.
42
00:02:02,989 --> 00:02:06,982
In front of your family and friends,
you will receive your lab coats,
43
00:02:07,026 --> 00:02:10,325
a symbol of your entree
into the world of medicine.
44
00:02:10,497 --> 00:02:13,625
- These doctors' coats...
- Murderers' coats, Bob.
45
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,332
Because they are all murderers.
46
00:02:16,769 --> 00:02:20,569
Anyhoo, the faculty will be choosing
a keynote speaker
47
00:02:20,607 --> 00:02:23,041
to represent the entire first-year class.
48
00:02:23,076 --> 00:02:24,839
And as part
of this meaningless charade,
49
00:02:24,878 --> 00:02:27,676
Winston University requires
that each of you sit with me,
50
00:02:27,714 --> 00:02:31,445
the Chief of Medicine, for an
irrelevant pre-ceremony interview.
51
00:02:31,484 --> 00:02:35,682
A quick sidebar, Perry?
Can I do the interview
52
00:02:35,722 --> 00:02:38,555
with that little number
in the second row?
53
00:02:38,625 --> 00:02:41,025
She said I reminded her
of her grandpa,
54
00:02:41,060 --> 00:02:44,461
and I think I could use that
to at least get her top off.
55
00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:47,955
- You're a hell of an educator, Bob.
- I do it for them.
56
00:02:51,604 --> 00:02:55,301
- So, you ready for your interview?
- So ready.
57
00:02:55,475 --> 00:02:58,808
I can answer any questions
about our classes, about the hospital,
58
00:02:58,845 --> 00:03:01,143
I even took the time
to memorize personal facts
59
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,945
about each of my professors,
so bring it.
60
00:03:04,384 --> 00:03:06,511
Well, there's really only one question.
61
00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:08,883
Why do you want to be a doctor?
62
00:03:09,389 --> 00:03:10,720
You've never been to Maine
63
00:03:10,757 --> 00:03:13,385
and you were college roommates
with Michael Bolton.
64
00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:17,254
Yes, and the latter
fuels most of my anger.
65
00:03:17,931 --> 00:03:19,626
I'd like you to come back
with a better answer,
66
00:03:19,666 --> 00:03:21,759
and if you find you can't come up
with a better answer,
67
00:03:21,801 --> 00:03:24,065
then please know I'm going to make it
my personal mission
68
00:03:24,103 --> 00:03:26,298
to drum you out of this med school.
69
00:03:26,339 --> 00:03:29,467
But you said this was just
a meaningless charade.
70
00:03:29,509 --> 00:03:32,000
Not for you. Get out.
71
00:03:32,378 --> 00:03:34,369
Stupid Michael Bolton.
72
00:03:38,017 --> 00:03:39,575
- Hey, buddy.
- Not your buddy.
73
00:03:39,619 --> 00:03:42,087
- Whatevs, bra.
- Also not your bro.
74
00:03:42,388 --> 00:03:44,379
Once again, it's you versus me.
75
00:03:44,424 --> 00:03:47,518
Smarts versus nepotism
for the keynote speaker.
76
00:03:47,660 --> 00:03:50,754
- Let the battle begin.
- There's no battle.
77
00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:53,624
This is something I want,
so I'm gonna crush you.
78
00:03:53,666 --> 00:03:57,067
Yeah, well, good luck,
'cause I got skills. Check it.
79
00:03:58,838 --> 00:04:00,032
Swish.
80
00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:06,735
Hey, Drew. You know how we get hot
over gross and disgusting things?
81
00:04:06,779 --> 00:04:09,714
Yes, and hello, Dr. Reid,
who I barely know.
82
00:04:09,882 --> 00:04:11,713
- 'Sup, freak?
- Hi.
83
00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:15,414
Anyway, check it out.
Mr. Warshal passed his kidney stone.
84
00:04:15,655 --> 00:04:16,815
That's hot.
85
00:04:16,856 --> 00:04:19,654
FYI, that's like passing a bowling ball
through a straw.
86
00:04:19,692 --> 00:04:21,353
They say it's actually a lot
like giving birth.
87
00:04:21,394 --> 00:04:24,090
Super-pumped, by the way.
Super-pumped.
88
00:04:25,298 --> 00:04:26,629
So, I'm taking you to dinner tonight.
89
00:04:26,666 --> 00:04:29,066
Did you bring anything less bloody
to change into?
90
00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:31,127
- Why?
- I don't know. It's a nice place.
91
00:04:31,170 --> 00:04:33,161
Wouldn't kill you to dress up
once in a while.
92
00:04:33,806 --> 00:04:34,966
Pretty girl.
93
00:04:35,008 --> 00:04:38,671
- You're a pretty girl.
- I am a pretty girl.
94
00:04:40,613 --> 00:04:42,137
Okay, guys. So, nine years ago,
95
00:04:42,181 --> 00:04:43,978
Joseph was my first
appendectomy patient.
96
00:04:44,017 --> 00:04:46,144
Since then,
some scar tissue has formed,
97
00:04:46,185 --> 00:04:48,210
so we're gonna clear that right up.
98
00:04:48,254 --> 00:04:50,484
Joseph, my old friend,
we'll take care of you,
99
00:04:50,523 --> 00:04:53,356
but first you gotta give me what I need.
100
00:04:56,729 --> 00:05:00,324
Brother speaks French!
That's a bromance language, y'all!
101
00:05:00,466 --> 00:05:02,730
Anyway, it says here
that we're delaying surgery
102
00:05:02,769 --> 00:05:05,966
due to topical irritation
near the incision site.
103
00:05:06,406 --> 00:05:09,500
If you guys'll excuse me for a second,
that would be great.
104
00:05:09,542 --> 00:05:12,568
Dude's a goner. I see it in his eyes.
105
00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:16,013
He's Haitian.
It's a poisonwood-berry burn.
106
00:05:16,215 --> 00:05:18,706
- How do you know?
- Trust me, I know.
107
00:05:18,751 --> 00:05:20,343
Boy George, if you're right,
108
00:05:20,386 --> 00:05:23,321
you could seal the deal
for keynote speaker.
109
00:05:23,356 --> 00:05:24,448
Too little too late.
110
00:05:24,490 --> 00:05:27,323
My fam just donated
another MRI thingy.
111
00:05:28,294 --> 00:05:32,128
Joseph, we're gonna solve this puzzle,
and in thanks, you'll say...
112
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:35,225
- Merci beaucoup.
- Merci beaucoup!
113
00:05:36,369 --> 00:05:37,768
Incredible.
114
00:05:38,204 --> 00:05:39,364
- Dr. Turk.
- Yes.
115
00:05:39,405 --> 00:05:41,532
I think I know what's wrong.
116
00:05:41,574 --> 00:05:43,974
It's a reaction
to the acidic black poisonwood berry.
117
00:05:44,010 --> 00:05:45,102
They're common
on Joseph's home island...
118
00:05:45,144 --> 00:05:48,636
Home island of Haiti.
Damn, I was just going to say that.
119
00:05:48,681 --> 00:05:52,549
Keep it up, Drew. Catches like this
could save someone's life.
120
00:05:56,923 --> 00:05:59,756
Dr. Cox,
I know why I want to be a doctor.
121
00:06:00,126 --> 00:06:01,559
I want to use my experience
122
00:06:01,594 --> 00:06:04,290
to make the kind of catches
that save lives.
123
00:06:04,330 --> 00:06:07,822
- To give people a chance to live...
- Hold that thought.
124
00:06:09,135 --> 00:06:11,603
Time of death, 4:23 p.m.
125
00:06:16,876 --> 00:06:18,935
Oh! I'm very...
126
00:06:20,780 --> 00:06:22,907
His middle name is Ulysses.
127
00:06:42,735 --> 00:06:45,169
- 'Sup, homes?
- Don't call me "homes."
128
00:06:45,204 --> 00:06:48,139
Actually, I like homes. I'll allow it.
What are you doing?
129
00:06:48,174 --> 00:06:49,573
Just surfing the Web,
130
00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:53,010
watching old White Coat speeches,
cherry-picking the best parts for mine.
131
00:06:53,079 --> 00:06:54,410
Solid plan.
132
00:06:54,447 --> 00:06:58,008
Hey, Drew, turns out you were right
about the Haitian berry reaction.
133
00:06:58,050 --> 00:07:01,952
I guess your diagnosis wasn't "rash"
after all.
134
00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:07,090
See, J.D.,
I told you they wouldn't laugh!
135
00:07:11,831 --> 00:07:14,857
Genius, man. You lay low at first,
136
00:07:14,901 --> 00:07:19,167
then the White Coat thing comes up,
and boom, you turn into a gunner.
137
00:07:19,405 --> 00:07:22,067
- What? I'm not a gunner.
- Please.
138
00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:23,769
Always got the right answer.
139
00:07:23,810 --> 00:07:26,836
Being all helpful
with that island-berry dude.
140
00:07:27,079 --> 00:07:31,914
- Dude, we are exactly the same.
- We are not the same.
141
00:07:32,351 --> 00:07:34,581
You're a selfish, petty child
142
00:07:34,754 --> 00:07:37,416
who would screw over anybody
to get ahead.
143
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,084
Like you did with Roger?
144
00:07:39,125 --> 00:07:43,118
...the second-best dentist
at a run-down strip mall. You get it.
145
00:07:48,267 --> 00:07:51,498
I followed him.
He called his folks, crying.
146
00:07:52,271 --> 00:07:53,829
It was awesome.
147
00:07:54,907 --> 00:07:57,842
Yeah, it's like looking
in a mirror, homes.
148
00:08:04,250 --> 00:08:05,512
Dr. Cox.
149
00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:10,412
I've done some soul-searching
and I have a new answer.
150
00:08:10,456 --> 00:08:14,620
Let me prep for the verbal brilliance
that is surely headed my way.
151
00:08:15,595 --> 00:08:18,655
- Ha. Proceed.
- I want to become a doctor
152
00:08:18,698 --> 00:08:21,292
so I can help people
who can't help themselves.
153
00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:23,165
- Lame.
- When my grandmother was ill...
154
00:08:23,202 --> 00:08:24,226
Boo!
155
00:08:24,270 --> 00:08:25,703
See, Dr. Quinn
was a medicine woman...
156
00:08:25,738 --> 00:08:29,606
Stop. Now, this is when
I would normally launch into a rant,
157
00:08:29,775 --> 00:08:31,538
but I've already told you
what the consequences are
158
00:08:31,577 --> 00:08:33,408
if you don't come up
with an acceptable answer
159
00:08:33,446 --> 00:08:34,777
prior to the ceremony.
160
00:08:34,814 --> 00:08:37,305
Right now,
you've got four strikes on you,
161
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:40,683
and even in the adjusted,
Lucy Bennett five-strike system
162
00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:41,914
that I recently established
163
00:08:41,954 --> 00:08:43,751
to accommodate
all major underachievers...
164
00:08:43,823 --> 00:08:45,120
Go ahead and take a second
and be happy
165
00:08:45,157 --> 00:08:46,886
that something was named after you.
166
00:08:46,926 --> 00:08:50,054
...you still need to come up
with something better.
167
00:08:50,229 --> 00:08:53,426
One more pathetic cliched answer
and you're gone.
168
00:08:54,267 --> 00:08:56,258
That was kind of a rant.
169
00:08:57,637 --> 00:09:00,606
Hey, why did you guys
want to become doctors?
170
00:09:01,007 --> 00:09:04,636
I actually didn't want to be a doctor.
I wanted to be a gymnast.
171
00:09:04,677 --> 00:09:06,907
But I was chesty for my age
and I had no balance,
172
00:09:06,979 --> 00:09:08,071
because when I was nine
173
00:09:08,114 --> 00:09:10,776
my cousin jammed a piece
of uncooked pasta in my ear.
174
00:09:10,816 --> 00:09:12,283
So the first time I went
on the balance beam,
175
00:09:12,318 --> 00:09:14,786
I fell off and broke my bajingo bone,
176
00:09:14,820 --> 00:09:18,312
so, really, I became a doctor
because my parents made me.
177
00:09:19,592 --> 00:09:22,459
- How about you, Dr. Mahoney?
- I like scabs.
178
00:09:23,996 --> 00:09:27,159
Hey, Drew, want to come over tonight
and watch one of those survival shows
179
00:09:27,199 --> 00:09:31,295
- and root for the guy to die?
- Tonight's not a good night, Denise.
180
00:09:36,175 --> 00:09:37,699
- Hey, work buddy.
- Hey.
181
00:09:37,743 --> 00:09:40,268
- You have a sec?
- Yeah. What do you want to do?
182
00:09:40,313 --> 00:09:41,678
You want to play a quick
Hide the Saltine?
183
00:09:41,714 --> 00:09:43,739
Maybe Giant Black Doctor?
184
00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:46,051
Damn, those never sounded dirty
with J.D.
185
00:09:46,085 --> 00:09:47,416
- Yes, they did.
- Oh.
186
00:09:47,453 --> 00:09:50,251
Actually, I was hoping
I could get a little advice.
187
00:09:50,289 --> 00:09:52,553
Tell mama your problems, baby.
188
00:09:53,092 --> 00:09:55,686
I'm having relationship issues
with Drew.
189
00:09:55,728 --> 00:09:57,992
- I know...
...just what to do.
190
00:09:58,331 --> 00:09:59,889
Great! I'm out!
191
00:09:59,999 --> 00:10:02,467
Okay, so he made a comment
about wanting you to look nice,
192
00:10:02,501 --> 00:10:04,093
and then you blew him off
and mocked him.
193
00:10:04,136 --> 00:10:06,798
- Yeah. Called him a girl.
- Well, fantastic. Okay.
194
00:10:06,839 --> 00:10:08,636
Does Drew ever do
anything nice for you?
195
00:10:08,674 --> 00:10:11,234
- Yeah, all the time.
- And do you ever do anything for him?
196
00:10:11,277 --> 00:10:13,507
Oh, no.
Who wants to travel down that road?
197
00:10:13,546 --> 00:10:15,343
Denise, like it or not,
you're in a relationship.
198
00:10:15,381 --> 00:10:18,248
Sometimes you have to do things
you don't want to do, like dressing nice.
199
00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:20,343
Or, in my case,
going to the zoo twice a month.
200
00:10:20,386 --> 00:10:22,513
I still don't know
why J.D. Is so obsessed
201
00:10:22,555 --> 00:10:24,079
with those damn penguins.
202
00:10:24,123 --> 00:10:26,489
It's because they look like
little formal people.
203
00:10:26,525 --> 00:10:28,618
We like to think they're British.
204
00:10:28,661 --> 00:10:31,528
- Turk, if you're out, then stay out.
- Fine!
205
00:10:32,198 --> 00:10:34,962
So, to make Drew happy I have to start
wearing tutus and prom dresses?
206
00:10:35,001 --> 00:10:37,265
That would look adorable, but no.
207
00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:40,329
Just throw on something sexy
once in a while, you know?
208
00:10:40,373 --> 00:10:42,170
Show him you care.
209
00:10:42,208 --> 00:10:44,574
"Anyone fancy a swim?"
210
00:10:46,746 --> 00:10:48,714
What? That's how they sound.
211
00:10:48,748 --> 00:10:51,012
That is
the way they sound!
212
00:10:52,885 --> 00:10:53,977
Where are you going?
213
00:10:54,553 --> 00:10:57,784
Hey, Cole, you know how
when we make love
214
00:10:57,823 --> 00:11:00,849
I can't look into your eyes
because they're so empty and soulless,
215
00:11:00,893 --> 00:11:02,258
so I just cover them with my hands?
216
00:11:02,294 --> 00:11:04,660
Yeah, it's cool.
I can see through your fingers.
217
00:11:04,697 --> 00:11:08,793
Well, I can get past that
if you'll be real with me just once.
218
00:11:09,301 --> 00:11:11,633
Why do you want to be a doctor?
219
00:11:11,904 --> 00:11:14,634
- Why the hell not?
- That's a good answer.
220
00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:18,007
- How could that be a good answer?
- Because he meant it.
221
00:11:18,044 --> 00:11:21,946
'Sup, Chiefs?
Hey, I hope the school has insurance,
222
00:11:21,981 --> 00:11:24,950
'cause my keynote speech
is going to blow the roof off this mother!
223
00:11:24,984 --> 00:11:27,782
You, son, are a very odd little squid.
224
00:11:29,555 --> 00:11:33,787
Oh, hey, wait, I want to talk to you.
Your academic record is impeccable,
225
00:11:33,826 --> 00:11:38,092
and Dr. Turk told me about your catch
with the poisonwood-berry burn.
226
00:11:38,230 --> 00:11:42,326
You are our choice as keynote speaker
for the White Coat Ceremony.
227
00:11:43,669 --> 00:11:47,969
Congratulations. It's tantamount
to getting half-off on a cup of soup.
228
00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:50,304
Who knows why we do
the things we do?
229
00:11:50,342 --> 00:11:53,641
Sometimes we're just trying
to make someone else happy.
230
00:11:54,046 --> 00:11:59,006
- So you think that outfit is sexy?
- Yeah. 'Cause I'm free-boobing it.
231
00:12:00,252 --> 00:12:03,517
Other times we leave people
searching for explanations.
232
00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:07,287
I don't want to be the keynote speaker,
but thanks.
233
00:12:10,262 --> 00:12:14,631
- Well, that's disappointing.
- I was gonna say, "Who cares?"
234
00:12:15,601 --> 00:12:18,866
But in our weakest moments,
it's all about jealousy.
235
00:12:18,904 --> 00:12:21,964
Hey, Dr. Turk, I need to show you
something on the Web.
236
00:12:22,007 --> 00:12:23,634
Is it a cat doing something
a human would do?
237
00:12:23,676 --> 00:12:25,337
'Cause if it is, I'm in.
238
00:12:25,377 --> 00:12:27,436
- Something with Drew.
- And a cat?
239
00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:31,246
No. Just look.
This is from 10 years ago, dude.
240
00:12:31,417 --> 00:12:34,750
...that dream is finally realized,
and as doctors...
241
00:12:37,690 --> 00:12:39,681
This ceremony's a joke, okay?
242
00:12:39,725 --> 00:12:42,455
I'm better than all you fools,
and you guys, too!
243
00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:46,090
Hey! I have something to say.
I don't need to be keynote speaker!
244
00:12:46,132 --> 00:12:50,466
Okay? You don't deserve these coats!
You don't deserve these coats, okay?
245
00:12:50,503 --> 00:12:52,164
Better recognize!
246
00:12:53,139 --> 00:12:54,663
You showed this to anybody?
247
00:12:54,707 --> 00:12:57,767
Still, nothing's as painful
as hiding from the past.
248
00:12:57,810 --> 00:13:01,268
Hey, Drew. "You better recognize"?
249
00:13:02,314 --> 00:13:05,442
- Something people said in the '90s.
- Cool people?
250
00:13:07,219 --> 00:13:08,277
No.
251
00:13:13,592 --> 00:13:14,752
Recognize!
252
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,352
Recognize!
253
00:13:16,395 --> 00:13:20,126
Yes. Hello. It's me.
254
00:13:21,367 --> 00:13:22,834
How could this be any worse?
255
00:13:26,605 --> 00:13:30,473
Scientists taught horses to talk,
and it turns out,
256
00:13:30,509 --> 00:13:33,205
because we've ridden them
all these years,
257
00:13:33,245 --> 00:13:35,941
they don't like humans!
258
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:42,845
- I don't even want to think about it.
- What the hell is wrong with Cole?
259
00:13:42,888 --> 00:13:44,014
Drew.
260
00:13:44,156 --> 00:13:46,818
Doctors are much more
than just physicians.
261
00:13:46,859 --> 00:13:48,588
They can be mentors.
262
00:13:48,627 --> 00:13:50,117
Come with me.
263
00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:52,589
Disciplinarians.
264
00:13:52,631 --> 00:13:53,723
Come with me.
265
00:13:55,801 --> 00:13:57,666
Even fashion advisers.
266
00:13:57,703 --> 00:14:00,194
- Come with me.
- I'm with a patient.
267
00:14:02,741 --> 00:14:04,800
Dementia? Please.
268
00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:07,870
Don't bring that weak sauce in here.
He'll never know you're gone.
269
00:14:07,913 --> 00:14:12,077
Fine. I'll just take my jacket off,
put it over the IV stand,
270
00:14:12,117 --> 00:14:15,018
- and he'll probably think it's still me.
- Sweet.
271
00:14:15,454 --> 00:14:17,388
Let's see what we have.
272
00:14:18,824 --> 00:14:21,622
You definitely need my blue eyes
for this one.
273
00:14:21,660 --> 00:14:23,753
And my pregnancy boobs for this one.
274
00:14:23,796 --> 00:14:25,991
Honestly, if I could give up
five years of my life
275
00:14:26,031 --> 00:14:27,794
to keep these bad boys, I would.
276
00:14:27,833 --> 00:14:30,768
You know, as long as I had a guarantee
that I'd live until, like, my 80s.
277
00:14:30,803 --> 00:14:33,772
Yeah, you should bring that up to God
when he grants you your magic boobs.
278
00:14:33,806 --> 00:14:36,604
In my head it wasn't God,
it was a genie.
279
00:14:36,675 --> 00:14:39,644
Yes, and we're going to figure out
what to do with these.
280
00:14:39,678 --> 00:14:42,545
Wow. You're like the sister
I never wanted.
281
00:14:43,282 --> 00:14:45,944
- Really?
- I'm not doing any of this.
282
00:14:46,385 --> 00:14:48,046
That is what the ugly duckling
always says in the movies,
283
00:14:48,087 --> 00:14:51,420
but then she takes her glasses off
and everyone thinks she's beautiful.
284
00:14:51,457 --> 00:14:54,426
Did you just call me
an ugly duckling?
285
00:14:54,460 --> 00:14:56,428
Look, there's Lucy. Hey, Lucy.
286
00:14:56,462 --> 00:14:59,124
- Did you see Drew's video?
- What video?
287
00:15:00,032 --> 00:15:02,057
- Come on.
- Too bad about your boy, Drew,
288
00:15:02,101 --> 00:15:04,092
but no worries. I'll pick up the slack.
289
00:15:04,136 --> 00:15:06,229
I already wrote the beginning
of my speech.
290
00:15:06,272 --> 00:15:08,797
So I open up with a line
from the movie Malice.
291
00:15:08,841 --> 00:15:13,744
"You ask me if I have a God complex.
I am God!" Boom! We're in.
292
00:15:13,779 --> 00:15:15,770
Yeah, you damn sure are.
293
00:15:17,650 --> 00:15:21,643
I don't think the lock works on that door,
so if he tries to get out, subdue him.
294
00:15:21,687 --> 00:15:24,451
- Sleeper hold or full nelson?
- Dealer's choice.
295
00:15:24,490 --> 00:15:27,254
- I'll see what feels right.
- Fair enough.
296
00:15:28,227 --> 00:15:30,991
Come out if you want to, boy.
Daddy's waiting.
297
00:15:31,830 --> 00:15:35,095
- Why am I scrubbing in again?
- The OR's a safe place.
298
00:15:35,134 --> 00:15:38,228
Nobody's gonna yell "recognize" at you
in here.
299
00:15:38,737 --> 00:15:42,935
Can I ask you a question?
Why do white people ruin everything?
300
00:15:43,242 --> 00:15:46,473
I only got to say "fo' shizzle" for a week.
A week!
301
00:15:46,845 --> 00:15:48,836
And what's up with you in that video?
302
00:15:48,881 --> 00:15:51,213
The psychologist called it
"an unbalanced act,"
303
00:15:51,250 --> 00:15:52,342
but I don't care about that video.
304
00:15:52,384 --> 00:15:55,319
I just hate that it reminds me
of who I was.
305
00:15:56,021 --> 00:15:57,852
What are
the three categories of presentation
306
00:15:57,890 --> 00:15:58,914
in Crohn's disease?
307
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,688
Stricturing, penetrating
and inflammatory.
308
00:16:01,727 --> 00:16:05,060
Sorry, Dr. Reynolds.
Looks like nobody else studied.
309
00:16:06,632 --> 00:16:08,463
Psst. Little help?
310
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,198
Thanks.
311
00:16:12,404 --> 00:16:16,204
Oh! This kid's got a cheat sheet.
That doesn't seem fair to the rest of us.
312
00:16:16,241 --> 00:16:17,538
I'm just saying.
313
00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:19,535
I pulled every dirty trick in the book
314
00:16:19,578 --> 00:16:21,375
and I still didn't get chosen
as keynote speaker.
315
00:16:21,747 --> 00:16:24,181
That honor went to Eric Puritsky.
316
00:16:25,417 --> 00:16:27,851
Let me get this straight.
You turned down keynote speaker
317
00:16:27,886 --> 00:16:31,219
because you're worried
you're becoming that guy again?
318
00:16:31,256 --> 00:16:33,315
I think I'm already there.
319
00:16:36,562 --> 00:16:38,587
Okay. Thank you so much
for letting me dress you up.
320
00:16:38,630 --> 00:16:41,258
I really needed some closure
on the whole makeover thing.
321
00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:43,359
Okay, now take your glasses off,
let that hair down
322
00:16:43,402 --> 00:16:46,496
and act like you don't know
how pretty you are.
323
00:17:02,988 --> 00:17:04,421
There it is!
324
00:17:05,824 --> 00:17:09,089
- What is with the sad face?
- Dr. Cox is still in my head
325
00:17:09,128 --> 00:17:11,460
about this whole
"why do you want to be a doctor" thing.
326
00:17:11,497 --> 00:17:15,126
I can't think of the answer
that he wants, you know?
327
00:17:15,167 --> 00:17:19,194
And you don't think your amazing
new look will take care of that?
328
00:17:19,838 --> 00:17:21,396
I really don't.
329
00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:25,340
Then maybe you should stop looking
for the perfect answer
330
00:17:25,377 --> 00:17:28,244
and just tell him
what you actually think.
331
00:17:31,016 --> 00:17:34,008
You see that, Drew?
That's scar tissue.
332
00:17:34,820 --> 00:17:36,788
Nine years ago,
when Joseph came to me,
333
00:17:36,822 --> 00:17:40,121
I popped out his appendix
and screwed up the closure.
334
00:17:40,159 --> 00:17:44,619
I was so focused on the abdomen
that I blew the cosmesis of the incision.
335
00:17:45,564 --> 00:17:50,024
Nowadays I know better, and I can fix it
without making the same mistake.
336
00:17:51,503 --> 00:17:54,631
And because of that, I don't have
to beat myself up over something
337
00:17:54,673 --> 00:17:59,372
that happened a long time ago.
So, what are you gonna do, Drew?
338
00:18:02,648 --> 00:18:04,445
I'm gonna scrub out.
339
00:18:06,618 --> 00:18:09,587
Hey. Saw that video. Crazy.
340
00:18:09,621 --> 00:18:12,590
Yeah. It's like my own personal
"Don't tase me, bro."
341
00:18:12,624 --> 00:18:14,990
- That's why you've been weird, huh?
- Pretty much.
342
00:18:15,027 --> 00:18:16,722
I thought it was about me.
343
00:18:16,762 --> 00:18:18,855
'Cause I wouldn't dress
all girly-gay for you.
344
00:18:18,897 --> 00:18:23,266
What? No. I mean, I guess I'd like
to see you like that sometime,
345
00:18:26,472 --> 00:18:29,134
but I would never ask you to do that.
346
00:18:31,176 --> 00:18:32,575
I gotta go.
347
00:18:35,180 --> 00:18:37,410
Why do I want to be a doctor?
348
00:18:40,953 --> 00:18:42,511
Recognize!
349
00:18:42,554 --> 00:18:44,385
Because the road sure as hell
isn't easy.
350
00:18:44,423 --> 00:18:45,481
Recognize.
351
00:18:45,524 --> 00:18:49,290
And there always seems to be
something standing in your way.
352
00:18:53,065 --> 00:18:55,295
Sometimes it's even yourself.
353
00:18:56,168 --> 00:18:58,500
- Dr. Cox.
- Oh, dear God.
354
00:18:58,904 --> 00:19:01,168
I don't have your perfect answer.
355
00:19:01,206 --> 00:19:03,572
At first I thought it was
to make my family proud,
356
00:19:03,609 --> 00:19:05,873
and then I thought
it was about saving lives,
357
00:19:05,911 --> 00:19:08,004
and for one second
I thought it was a chance
358
00:19:08,046 --> 00:19:11,948
to get closer to Dr. Sanjay Gupta,
who is a beautiful Indian man,
359
00:19:11,984 --> 00:19:14,145
and I've never visited
that continent romantically,
360
00:19:14,186 --> 00:19:17,280
- if you know what I mean.
- Unfortunately, I do.
361
00:19:17,623 --> 00:19:21,150
Anyway, the truth is,
I can't pick just one reason.
362
00:19:24,363 --> 00:19:26,593
Oh, my God, that's the answer.
363
00:19:27,499 --> 00:19:29,729
I want to be a doctor
for all those reasons,
364
00:19:29,768 --> 00:19:33,226
and a million more
that I haven't even thought of yet.
365
00:19:33,805 --> 00:19:35,363
That's not bad.
366
00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:38,943
Come on, let's go. We're gonna be late
for the White Coat Ceremony.
367
00:19:38,977 --> 00:19:43,471
- Ooh! Plus, I look super-cute in white.
- Now you ruined it.
368
00:19:43,982 --> 00:19:47,076
Luckily, we're surrounded
by amazing individuals.
369
00:19:48,053 --> 00:19:51,386
Talented faculty, dedicated mentors,
370
00:19:51,990 --> 00:19:56,154
outstanding students
who all strive for excellence.
371
00:20:01,633 --> 00:20:06,263
And then there's the new friends,
who make it all a little easier to handle.
372
00:20:06,939 --> 00:20:08,236
So, in closing,
373
00:20:08,273 --> 00:20:12,107
I'd like to give a simple response
to Dr. Cox's question.
374
00:20:12,911 --> 00:20:14,640
Why do I want to be a doctor?
375
00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:20,346
Well, because doctors
give people second chances.
376
00:20:22,955 --> 00:20:25,480
And we all deserve a second chance.
377
00:20:29,161 --> 00:20:30,822
Better recognize.
378
00:20:40,839 --> 00:20:43,467
Hey, I know how you're really mad
at the Internet right now.
379
00:20:43,508 --> 00:20:46,341
Well, it taketh away, but it also giveth.
380
00:20:49,281 --> 00:20:50,680
- And meet the crew!
- You're welcome.
381
00:20:50,716 --> 00:20:57,679
You got Styles, Tricky, Lil' Tricky,
my man Boots, and me, Cole Fusion.
382
00:20:57,956 --> 00:21:01,289
Are you ready?
'Cause this is happening!
383
00:21:01,326 --> 00:21:02,884
Let's go, boys!
384
00:21:14,773 --> 00:21:15,831
No!
385
00:21:16,275 --> 00:21:19,244
Hey, don't just stand there, man,
help me up!
386
00:21:20,545 --> 00:21:22,342
Is my hair still cool?
387
00:21:22,381 --> 00:21:24,713
- I forgive you, Internet.
- Help me up!
388
00:21:24,750 --> 00:21:27,310
Come on! Hey, turn that off!
Get that away!32307
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