All language subtitles for Growing Up Fisher - 01x06 - Drug-Bust.LOL

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,972 --> 00:00:03,960 One of the upsides of my parents splitting up 2 00:00:03,990 --> 00:00:06,060 was I got to spend time just me and dad. 3 00:00:06,090 --> 00:00:08,390 Hi. Regular coffee and a hot chocolate, please. 4 00:00:08,430 --> 00:00:11,060 Uh, ten marshmallows, two in and eight on the side. 5 00:00:11,100 --> 00:00:12,530 Two in and zero on the side. 6 00:00:12,570 --> 00:00:14,030 [Chokes] 7 00:00:14,070 --> 00:00:15,740 - He's choking! - Choking. Somebody's choking. 8 00:00:15,770 --> 00:00:17,800 Oh, and my dad was blind 9 00:00:17,840 --> 00:00:19,970 which, I guess, technically is considered a handicap. 10 00:00:20,010 --> 00:00:21,440 - Uh, d-dad. - I'm on it. 11 00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:23,710 But ironically the blind guy didn't see it that way. 12 00:00:23,740 --> 00:00:24,810 Uuhh! 13 00:00:29,520 --> 00:00:31,920 - Thanks. - Yeah. 14 00:00:31,950 --> 00:00:33,590 Anybody need a baby delivered? 15 00:00:33,620 --> 00:00:35,460 [Customers giggle, murmur] 16 00:00:35,490 --> 00:00:37,320 It wasn't all superhero stuff. 17 00:00:37,360 --> 00:00:38,790 Here you go, bud, 18 00:00:38,830 --> 00:00:41,460 there were some downsides to having a blind dad, 19 00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:44,130 like... finger juice. 20 00:00:44,170 --> 00:00:48,670 But the biggest downside? His crazy bedtime stories. 21 00:00:48,700 --> 00:00:50,340 For as long as I could remember... 22 00:00:50,370 --> 00:00:54,010 Yep, got this freak infection and went blind when I was 12. 23 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:55,969 Went to bed 20/20. Woke up... 24 00:00:55,970 --> 00:00:56,646 [Pops lips] Nothing. 25 00:00:56,647 --> 00:00:57,580 [Sighs] Huh. 26 00:00:57,610 --> 00:01:01,480 I was just a little bit older than you are now. 27 00:01:01,520 --> 00:01:04,380 Anyway, get some sleep, buddy. 28 00:01:04,420 --> 00:01:06,390 Only one part of the story ever changed. 29 00:01:06,420 --> 00:01:09,160 I was just three years older than you. 30 00:01:09,190 --> 00:01:11,960 I was just two years older than you. 31 00:01:11,990 --> 00:01:13,560 I was just a year older than you. 32 00:01:13,590 --> 00:01:15,360 Anyway, get some sleep, buddy. 33 00:01:15,400 --> 00:01:17,730 Looking back, it was completely irrational. 34 00:01:17,770 --> 00:01:19,800 But I was terrified of my 12th birthday. 35 00:01:19,830 --> 00:01:21,030 You know that nightmare 36 00:01:21,070 --> 00:01:22,740 about showing up to school in your underwear? 37 00:01:22,770 --> 00:01:25,610 I would've killed for that one. 38 00:01:25,640 --> 00:01:27,210 ♪ Let's tell the world ♪ 39 00:01:27,240 --> 00:01:29,480 ♪ All the things we've done ♪ 40 00:01:29,510 --> 00:01:31,410 ♪ Places we've been ♪ 41 00:01:31,450 --> 00:01:33,380 ♪ In the setting sun ♪ 42 00:01:33,410 --> 00:01:37,520 ♪ I've got a song and a smile so bright ♪ 43 00:01:37,550 --> 00:01:41,190 ♪ I'll make you wish you were here tonight ♪ 44 00:01:41,220 --> 00:01:45,019 ♪ I'll make you wish you were here tonight ♪ 45 00:01:45,020 --> 00:01:48,041 ☯Synced & Corrected by Seppuku17☯ ❃www.addic7ed.com❃ 46 00:01:48,042 --> 00:01:49,500 With my birthday just days away, 47 00:01:49,530 --> 00:01:53,370 I was giving myself eye tests roughly every chance I got. 48 00:01:54,770 --> 00:01:56,540 What's happening here? 49 00:01:56,570 --> 00:02:00,570 Oh! Um, just checking to see if I have X-ray vision. 50 00:02:00,610 --> 00:02:01,880 Sometimes I think I might. 51 00:02:01,910 --> 00:02:04,310 Oh, bug, try and get that all out of your system, 52 00:02:04,350 --> 00:02:06,610 or they're gonna destroy you in high school. 53 00:02:06,650 --> 00:02:08,550 I didn't wanna tell my family what was worrying me, 54 00:02:08,580 --> 00:02:11,020 because deep down I knew it was ridiculous... 55 00:02:11,050 --> 00:02:13,290 slash definitely, definitely happening. 56 00:02:13,320 --> 00:02:15,120 Okay, be brutally honest. 57 00:02:15,160 --> 00:02:16,720 Do I look like I'm trying too hard, 58 00:02:16,760 --> 00:02:18,020 not trying at all? 59 00:02:18,060 --> 00:02:20,030 Like, where do I fall on the trying spectrum? 60 00:02:20,060 --> 00:02:21,190 You're very trying. 61 00:02:21,230 --> 00:02:23,030 Wait, is that my scarf? 62 00:02:23,060 --> 00:02:24,660 And my perfume? 63 00:02:24,700 --> 00:02:27,770 Mom, what did I tell you about borrowing my stuff? 64 00:02:27,800 --> 00:02:29,600 We have so many great talks, hon. 65 00:02:29,640 --> 00:02:30,970 I don't remember. 66 00:02:31,010 --> 00:02:32,510 Look, I'm gonna be on campus today, 67 00:02:32,540 --> 00:02:34,540 buying my textbooks, and I wanna look nice. 68 00:02:34,580 --> 00:02:36,480 Mom was getting her degree in family therapy 69 00:02:36,510 --> 00:02:37,940 which, given our family, 70 00:02:37,980 --> 00:02:39,810 should've earned her a minor in irony. 71 00:02:39,850 --> 00:02:41,250 Bye, birthday boy. 72 00:02:41,280 --> 00:02:42,780 It's not my birthday yet, mom. 73 00:02:42,820 --> 00:02:45,250 Three days. Technically I'm still 11. 74 00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:47,190 And you're more like dad every day. 75 00:02:47,220 --> 00:02:49,320 Any other day I would've taken that as a compliment, 76 00:02:49,360 --> 00:02:50,920 but today I did not. 77 00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:52,330 And that's why I said... 78 00:02:52,360 --> 00:02:55,030 Well, you're more like mom every day. 79 00:02:55,060 --> 00:02:57,360 Since I was sure I was going blind, 80 00:02:57,400 --> 00:02:59,030 Runyen and I came up with a list 81 00:02:59,070 --> 00:03:01,570 of all things I needed to see before it happened. 82 00:03:01,600 --> 00:03:03,270 Mona Lisa, you gotta see that. 83 00:03:03,300 --> 00:03:05,040 Niagara Falls, breathtaking. 84 00:03:06,140 --> 00:03:10,080 Hold the phone. 85 00:03:10,110 --> 00:03:12,280 I know what you need to see before you go blind. 86 00:03:12,310 --> 00:03:16,280 Boobs! Naked boobs. 87 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:17,980 Yeah. 88 00:03:19,390 --> 00:03:20,650 Mel? 89 00:03:20,690 --> 00:03:22,960 It's Principal Sloan from Henry's school. 90 00:03:22,990 --> 00:03:25,730 Well, now it's Principal Sloan from across the hall. 91 00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:28,060 Yeah, I heard a rumor you were moving in. 92 00:03:28,100 --> 00:03:31,030 That should traumatize Henry nicely. 93 00:03:31,070 --> 00:03:32,470 Welcome to the neighborhood. 94 00:03:32,500 --> 00:03:33,670 - [Elvis growling] - Oh... sorry. 95 00:03:33,700 --> 00:03:35,900 - Elvis, no, no. - That's okay. 96 00:03:35,940 --> 00:03:38,840 He probably just smells my ex-wife's apricot body splash. 97 00:03:38,870 --> 00:03:40,740 Or the salt from my tears. [Laughs] 98 00:03:40,770 --> 00:03:42,310 - Ha. - No, it's good. 99 00:03:42,340 --> 00:03:43,940 It's good. It's a fresh start. 100 00:03:43,980 --> 00:03:46,180 Okay, well, I'd help you lug boxes, but... 101 00:03:46,210 --> 00:03:47,380 Oh, no, no, no. Of course. 102 00:03:47,420 --> 00:03:50,020 Yeah, ah. I get outta all kinds of stuff. 103 00:03:50,050 --> 00:03:53,390 Airport runs, charades. 104 00:03:53,420 --> 00:03:57,520 All in all, being blind is a... pretty sweet deal. 105 00:03:57,560 --> 00:03:58,930 Wendy and I used to play charades. 106 00:03:58,960 --> 00:04:00,930 [Door closes] 107 00:04:00,960 --> 00:04:04,900 [Elvis whimpers] 108 00:04:04,930 --> 00:04:07,530 Whoa, Elvis, your snoot is out of control today, buddy. 109 00:04:07,570 --> 00:04:08,840 What do you got? 110 00:04:08,870 --> 00:04:10,570 No, leave Katie's stuff alone. 111 00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:12,710 No. Leave it! 112 00:04:12,740 --> 00:04:14,710 Did she leave food in her bag again? 113 00:04:14,740 --> 00:04:17,610 How many times do I have to give the ant speech? 114 00:04:17,650 --> 00:04:21,280 What's this? 115 00:04:21,320 --> 00:04:24,450 [Sniffs] 116 00:04:24,490 --> 00:04:27,050 I'm gonna need a new speech. 117 00:04:27,090 --> 00:04:29,260 Well, you don't have to be a family therapist 118 00:04:29,290 --> 00:04:31,120 to know what's upsetting Henry. 119 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:33,560 He's obviously anxious that with the divorce 120 00:04:33,590 --> 00:04:35,900 his birthday is going to get lost in the shuffle. 121 00:04:35,930 --> 00:04:38,030 Which is why he's gonna love the surprise party. 122 00:04:38,070 --> 00:04:39,700 [Sighs] Maybe we should tell him. 123 00:04:39,730 --> 00:04:41,030 Should tell him? Let's tell him. 124 00:04:41,070 --> 00:04:42,500 - Henry! - Or... 125 00:04:42,540 --> 00:04:44,800 we could not tell him about the surprise party 126 00:04:44,840 --> 00:04:46,810 and have it be a surprise party. 127 00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:49,580 Remind me to stand like this next time I wear that outfit. 128 00:04:49,610 --> 00:04:53,810 It's really effective. 129 00:04:53,850 --> 00:04:55,320 [Door opens] 130 00:04:55,350 --> 00:04:56,750 Hi. 131 00:04:56,780 --> 00:04:57,880 How are you? 132 00:04:57,920 --> 00:04:59,590 What? 133 00:04:59,620 --> 00:05:00,890 Elvis found something in your bag. 134 00:05:00,920 --> 00:05:02,420 - Oh, shoot. - Uh-huh. 135 00:05:02,460 --> 00:05:04,960 Look, that energy bar was wrapped in foil. 136 00:05:04,990 --> 00:05:07,060 There's no way the ants were after that. 137 00:05:07,090 --> 00:05:08,900 If you're still finding ants it's 'cause of Henry. 138 00:05:08,930 --> 00:05:12,570 That kid keeps chocolate in every pocket. 139 00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:15,540 What is that? 140 00:05:15,570 --> 00:05:17,200 That's not mine. 141 00:05:17,240 --> 00:05:19,140 Then why was it in your purse? 142 00:05:19,170 --> 00:05:21,240 [Cash register dings] That'll be 158.52. 143 00:05:21,280 --> 00:05:24,710 Oh, shoot! I don't have my wallet. 144 00:05:24,750 --> 00:05:26,350 I borrowed my daughter's purse yesterday. 145 00:05:26,380 --> 00:05:28,310 [Gasps] Shoot! 146 00:05:28,350 --> 00:05:30,620 So, what, the joint just flew into your bag 147 00:05:30,650 --> 00:05:31,990 all by itself? 148 00:05:32,020 --> 00:05:33,650 Whoa, man! 149 00:05:33,690 --> 00:05:37,320 This bag looks like a mellow place to hang out, man. 150 00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:39,430 - Who are you supposed to be? - Oh, I'm sorry! 151 00:05:39,460 --> 00:05:40,930 I don't know about drugs. 152 00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:42,430 How do they talk? I don't know either. 153 00:05:42,460 --> 00:05:43,460 - It's not mine. - Katie, 154 00:05:43,500 --> 00:05:45,900 you are talking to a trial attorney 155 00:05:45,930 --> 00:05:49,500 with 30 years of experience dealing with evasive defendants. 156 00:05:49,540 --> 00:05:52,740 I am not a defendant! [Sighs] 157 00:05:52,770 --> 00:05:53,970 Katherine! 158 00:05:54,010 --> 00:05:55,880 What? Are you gonna throw your gavel at me? 159 00:05:55,910 --> 00:05:58,180 I don't have a... 160 00:05:58,210 --> 00:06:00,880 Do you even know what I do for a living? 161 00:06:05,580 --> 00:06:08,180 So mom used my key to sneak into dad's apartment 162 00:06:08,220 --> 00:06:09,480 to look for her pot, 163 00:06:09,520 --> 00:06:12,350 which she had left in Katie's bag. 164 00:06:22,530 --> 00:06:24,300 Katie? 165 00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:30,270 Katie, is that you? 166 00:06:30,310 --> 00:06:32,440 Katie, I can smell your perfume. 167 00:06:34,810 --> 00:06:37,210 - Actually, Mel, it's me. - Oh. 168 00:06:37,250 --> 00:06:38,310 - Hi. - Hi. 169 00:06:38,350 --> 00:06:39,950 Yeah, I just brought a box of stuff over 170 00:06:39,980 --> 00:06:41,750 for Henry's surprise party to stash here. 171 00:06:41,780 --> 00:06:44,750 Not stash, uh, store. Store... here. 172 00:06:44,790 --> 00:06:47,120 You know what, actually, I'm glad you're here. 173 00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:49,360 Will you... have a seat, please? 174 00:06:49,390 --> 00:06:51,830 We really need to talk. [Sighs] 175 00:06:51,860 --> 00:06:53,930 Mom knew what she had to do... 176 00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:56,200 Her classic speak 'n' sneak. 177 00:06:56,230 --> 00:06:57,570 Okay, what's up? 178 00:06:57,600 --> 00:06:59,270 Well, even though we are divorced, 179 00:06:59,300 --> 00:07:00,700 we still need to be a united front 180 00:07:00,740 --> 00:07:03,870 when it comes to the kids, right? 181 00:07:03,910 --> 00:07:05,910 Yes, of course. 182 00:07:05,940 --> 00:07:08,210 Okay. 183 00:07:08,240 --> 00:07:11,050 Ah, boy, there's just no easy way to tell you this. 184 00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:13,080 What is it, Mel? 185 00:07:13,120 --> 00:07:14,850 Well... 186 00:07:14,880 --> 00:07:16,220 Our daughter is on drugs. 187 00:07:16,250 --> 00:07:17,890 - What? - Ooh! 188 00:07:17,920 --> 00:07:19,790 Joyce, come on! You know I don't like it 189 00:07:19,820 --> 00:07:21,960 when you speak 'n' sneak. 190 00:07:23,260 --> 00:07:25,560 Dude, I'm telling you, we go back into your house, 191 00:07:25,590 --> 00:07:27,360 we see Katie in the shower, and... 192 00:07:27,400 --> 00:07:29,100 My sister is not the reference point I'm looking for, 193 00:07:29,130 --> 00:07:30,770 - so stop asking. - [Sighs] 194 00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:32,170 This is perfect. 195 00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:34,600 I heard my mom talking about how Mrs. Glebe breast-feeds 196 00:07:34,640 --> 00:07:36,470 every morning before work. 197 00:07:36,510 --> 00:07:38,870 Breast-feed! It's right in the name. 198 00:07:42,580 --> 00:07:44,850 - Oh, my God, there she is. - Whoa. 199 00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:46,750 Mrs. Glebe's beautiful. 200 00:07:46,780 --> 00:07:50,080 - Oh, my God. - Be cool, be cool, be cool. 201 00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:52,650 [Breast pump whirring] 202 00:07:52,690 --> 00:07:54,090 Uhh... 203 00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:56,220 - [Gasps] - Abort, abort! 204 00:07:56,260 --> 00:07:57,860 What was that machine doing to her? 205 00:07:57,890 --> 00:07:59,590 Now I wish I was blind! 206 00:07:59,630 --> 00:08:01,130 Maybe it's not hers, Mel. 207 00:08:01,160 --> 00:08:03,730 Maybe it's some other kindhearted person 208 00:08:03,770 --> 00:08:05,230 who just wanted to try it once 209 00:08:05,270 --> 00:08:08,100 and then stupidly, stupidly left it in Katie's bag. 210 00:08:08,140 --> 00:08:09,500 No, it's hers. 211 00:08:09,540 --> 00:08:11,470 She ran right outta here. Guilty! 212 00:08:11,510 --> 00:08:13,110 Okay, let's not be so quick to judge. 213 00:08:13,140 --> 00:08:14,880 Well, maybe you should be a little quicker to judge. 214 00:08:14,910 --> 00:08:16,340 I mean, what is going on over there, Joyce? 215 00:08:16,380 --> 00:08:18,480 I'm barely outta the house and our daughter is on drugs! 216 00:08:18,510 --> 00:08:20,580 - She's not on drugs, Mel. - Joyce, wake up and smell 217 00:08:20,620 --> 00:08:21,920 - the mariju... - Okay, it's my pot, okay? 218 00:08:21,950 --> 00:08:24,120 Mine. Yes, mine. Not Katie's. 219 00:08:24,150 --> 00:08:27,460 Yeah... what do you got to say now? 220 00:08:27,490 --> 00:08:29,390 Well, that's not a lot better! 221 00:08:29,420 --> 00:08:31,330 Joyce, I know you're in this experimental phase, 222 00:08:31,360 --> 00:08:34,130 and you're doing the kale chips and the meditation app, 223 00:08:34,160 --> 00:08:35,830 but there is a line! Good lord! 224 00:08:35,860 --> 00:08:37,900 What are you, running a drug den over there? 225 00:08:37,930 --> 00:08:39,730 I've only had the joint a day, all right? 226 00:08:39,770 --> 00:08:41,070 I haven't even tried it yet. 227 00:08:41,100 --> 00:08:42,500 A philosophy major that I met at orientation 228 00:08:42,540 --> 00:08:44,640 gave it to me when I complimented her ukulele. 229 00:08:44,670 --> 00:08:47,610 Oh. Well, at least you got it from some girl with no future. 230 00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:49,310 [Groans] 231 00:08:49,340 --> 00:08:51,050 You're so uptight! 232 00:08:51,080 --> 00:08:53,110 Okay. [Laughs] 233 00:08:53,150 --> 00:08:54,580 You know what, Mel? 234 00:08:54,620 --> 00:08:56,920 I honestly don't care what you think. 235 00:08:56,950 --> 00:08:58,390 When we were married, maybe. 236 00:08:58,420 --> 00:08:59,890 But now that we're getting divorced, 237 00:08:59,920 --> 00:09:01,420 uh-huh, okay? 238 00:09:01,460 --> 00:09:02,920 I've always kinda wanted to try pot. 239 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:04,860 I've wanted to do a lot of new things... 240 00:09:04,890 --> 00:09:07,160 maybe go vegan, learn to play the drums. 241 00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:09,060 But I never even mentioned any of those things 242 00:09:09,100 --> 00:09:10,830 because I knew this is how you would react. 243 00:09:10,870 --> 00:09:13,030 Well, then I did my job. You're welcome. 244 00:09:13,070 --> 00:09:14,970 This... is what pushed me away, Mel. 245 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:16,870 And let me tell you something, if you don't ease up, 246 00:09:16,910 --> 00:09:20,470 you're gonna push Katie away too. 247 00:09:20,510 --> 00:09:22,310 So if you'll kindly hand over my doobie, 248 00:09:22,340 --> 00:09:23,610 I will be on my way. 249 00:09:23,650 --> 00:09:25,510 Nope. Not gonna happen. 250 00:09:25,550 --> 00:09:27,620 [Elvis whimpers] 251 00:09:34,290 --> 00:09:37,420 Ah, in a drawer with the pot holders! 252 00:09:37,460 --> 00:09:39,130 Nice touch, Mel! 253 00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:41,400 That's a coincidence. 254 00:09:41,430 --> 00:09:44,670 I would never trivialize drugs with a humorous... 255 00:09:44,700 --> 00:09:46,170 hiding place. 256 00:09:46,200 --> 00:09:48,200 Thanks again for helping me 257 00:09:48,240 --> 00:09:50,470 take these party things back over to Joyce's house. 258 00:09:50,510 --> 00:09:52,370 - Oh, no problemo. - Hello? 259 00:09:52,410 --> 00:09:55,010 ♪ Katie, it's your father ♪ 260 00:09:55,040 --> 00:09:57,310 Hey, guys, I'll be right there. 261 00:09:57,350 --> 00:09:59,550 It's this boy I met from camp. He's so obsessed with me. 262 00:09:59,580 --> 00:10:01,520 [Laughs] 263 00:10:01,550 --> 00:10:02,750 What? 264 00:10:02,780 --> 00:10:05,390 Well, I just wanted to have a little talk 265 00:10:05,420 --> 00:10:08,560 about our... our miscommunication earlier. 266 00:10:08,590 --> 00:10:10,690 You mean how you falsely accused me of doing drugs? 267 00:10:10,730 --> 00:10:14,130 Well, yeah, I guess that was the gist of it. 268 00:10:14,160 --> 00:10:15,700 Katie, I'm really sorry. 269 00:10:15,730 --> 00:10:18,330 Sorry for not believing me? Sorry for yelling? 270 00:10:18,370 --> 00:10:20,600 Sorry for your general stick up your ass... 271 00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:21,740 ishness? 272 00:10:21,770 --> 00:10:23,570 It's, uh, sort of a blanket apology. 273 00:10:23,610 --> 00:10:25,410 You know what, dad? I can't hear you. 274 00:10:25,440 --> 00:10:28,410 I'm in a meth lab, and it's really loud! 275 00:10:28,440 --> 00:10:30,510 Stick up my ass? 276 00:10:30,550 --> 00:10:31,850 I don't have a stick up my a... 277 00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:33,280 If I had a stick up my ass, 278 00:10:33,320 --> 00:10:35,020 I would've called her out for using the word "ass." 279 00:10:35,050 --> 00:10:36,650 Female GPS voice: Right on Colorado. 280 00:10:36,690 --> 00:10:38,350 I'm not uptight. Are you turning on Colorado? 281 00:10:38,390 --> 00:10:40,120 I think we should stay on apple grove. 282 00:10:40,160 --> 00:10:42,390 Yes, the blind guy correcting the GPS lady 283 00:10:42,420 --> 00:10:43,890 is not at all uptight. 284 00:10:43,930 --> 00:10:45,830 I mean, you're a principal. Your whole gig is by-the-book. 285 00:10:45,860 --> 00:10:47,060 You know what I'm saying. 286 00:10:47,100 --> 00:10:49,100 Yes, I'm a man of law. 287 00:10:49,130 --> 00:10:51,630 I respect order and I follow the rules. 288 00:10:51,670 --> 00:10:52,970 But I've also smoked pot. 289 00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:54,600 - Really? - Yep. 290 00:10:54,640 --> 00:10:57,100 I gotta stay current with what's going on in my students' lives. 291 00:10:57,140 --> 00:10:59,870 Violent video games, Twilight books, 292 00:10:59,910 --> 00:11:01,840 yogurt in tubes, 293 00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:03,480 even the wacky tobacky, if they're into that. 294 00:11:03,510 --> 00:11:05,650 See, I gotta try it so I know where they're coming from 295 00:11:05,680 --> 00:11:07,110 without overreacting. 296 00:11:07,150 --> 00:11:09,380 Otherwise I risk alienating them and... 297 00:11:09,420 --> 00:11:12,090 then I've lost them forever. 298 00:11:12,120 --> 00:11:13,820 Like in Twilight when Jacob lost Bella. 299 00:11:17,130 --> 00:11:19,160 Yeah, I think you're right. 300 00:11:19,190 --> 00:11:23,130 I do need to sample stuff outside my own comfort zone 301 00:11:23,170 --> 00:11:25,670 - so I don't lose them. - Mel Fisher... 302 00:11:25,700 --> 00:11:29,140 neighbor, dare I say "friend"... 303 00:11:29,170 --> 00:11:30,810 You are so g-d brave. 304 00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:32,840 You're not gonna hug me, are you? 305 00:11:32,870 --> 00:11:34,840 No, I was not. 306 00:11:34,880 --> 00:11:37,810 So... do you have any pot? 307 00:11:37,850 --> 00:11:40,080 I don't know how you say it. Can you hook me up? 308 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:41,450 I don't have a guy anymore 309 00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:43,180 since they closed that blockbuster. 310 00:11:43,220 --> 00:11:45,150 [Elvis whimpers] 311 00:11:45,190 --> 00:11:47,290 Uh, you know what? Never mind, I think I'm good. 312 00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:48,660 Thank you for helping out, 313 00:11:48,690 --> 00:11:50,420 and, uh, enjoy the rest of your day off. 314 00:11:50,460 --> 00:11:51,960 Okay. What are you up to for dinner? 315 00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:55,830 [Elvis whines] 316 00:11:55,860 --> 00:11:59,170 Yeah. Good boy! 317 00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:00,400 [Sniffs] 318 00:12:00,440 --> 00:12:02,970 You find drugs better than the real Elvis. 319 00:12:04,010 --> 00:12:06,340 Pot. 320 00:12:06,370 --> 00:12:08,480 Pot. 321 00:12:08,510 --> 00:12:11,280 I'm gonna be a person who smokes pot. 322 00:12:11,310 --> 00:12:14,950 Elvis, maybe you should go upwind. 323 00:12:14,980 --> 00:12:17,590 I don't want you inhaling any secondhand drug smoke. 324 00:12:17,620 --> 00:12:20,020 Go, buddy! 325 00:12:20,060 --> 00:12:21,620 [Sighs] 326 00:12:24,390 --> 00:12:29,160 [Lighter clicking] 327 00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:33,200 [Police radio chatter] 328 00:12:33,240 --> 00:12:35,970 What? No, I'm not. Wha... who's this? 329 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:37,070 Give us a sec. 330 00:12:37,110 --> 00:12:38,740 Oh, God. 331 00:12:42,030 --> 00:12:43,364 If you don't have a prescription, we're gonna have 332 00:12:43,365 --> 00:12:45,230 to write you a citation for possession. 333 00:12:45,260 --> 00:12:46,760 Makes sense. We have laws. 334 00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:49,300 They exist for a reason. 335 00:12:51,070 --> 00:12:52,340 Sorry. [Sighs] 336 00:12:52,370 --> 00:12:54,940 We didn't realize that you were, uh... 337 00:12:54,970 --> 00:12:56,340 non-sighted. 338 00:12:56,370 --> 00:12:58,440 Yeah. Um, I think we're good here. 339 00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:00,280 Take care now, sir. 340 00:13:00,310 --> 00:13:01,710 Wha-wha-what about my citation? 341 00:13:01,750 --> 00:13:03,150 Oh, it's forgotten, sir. 342 00:13:03,180 --> 00:13:05,720 Hey, don't call me sir just 'cause I'm blind. 343 00:13:05,750 --> 00:13:07,050 We're not. 344 00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:09,290 We're calling you sir 'cause you're like...50. 345 00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:10,920 I don't want special treatment. 346 00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:12,720 This is America, for crying out loud. 347 00:13:12,760 --> 00:13:14,930 You should be arresting me! 348 00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:16,860 Okay. Loosen up, sir. 349 00:13:18,560 --> 00:13:21,130 Cops telling people to loosen up. 350 00:13:21,170 --> 00:13:22,630 This country's going down the tubes. 351 00:13:23,670 --> 00:13:26,740 I don't know if I feel comfortable doing this. 352 00:13:26,770 --> 00:13:28,570 Oh, you're not comfortable? 353 00:13:28,610 --> 00:13:31,270 Buddy, you got less than 24 hours till your birthday, 354 00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:32,580 then it's lights out. 355 00:13:32,610 --> 00:13:34,780 A girls' high school locker room is all we got, 356 00:13:34,810 --> 00:13:37,450 so you get comfortable. 357 00:13:40,350 --> 00:13:42,420 Everything's bigger in high school. 358 00:13:42,450 --> 00:13:43,820 Yeah. 359 00:13:43,850 --> 00:13:45,820 If we got stuffed in these lockers, 360 00:13:45,860 --> 00:13:47,890 it wouldn't be that bad. 361 00:13:47,920 --> 00:13:49,530 [School bell rings, laughter] 362 00:13:49,560 --> 00:13:51,130 Quick! 363 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:56,970 Clear your mind and prepare for your reference point. 364 00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:59,570 'Cause here they come! 365 00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:02,940 [Overlapping chatter, laughter] 366 00:14:02,970 --> 00:14:05,770 Wait. What are guys doing in here? 367 00:14:05,810 --> 00:14:08,780 What goes on in high school? 368 00:14:08,810 --> 00:14:12,280 Wrong locker room! Abort, abort! 369 00:14:12,320 --> 00:14:14,780 Everything is bigger in high school. 370 00:14:17,450 --> 00:14:19,020 Is this a cry for attention? 371 00:14:19,060 --> 00:14:22,960 Like, do you need more structure and control in your life? 372 00:14:22,990 --> 00:14:25,790 Or... has this just been inside of you for a while, 373 00:14:25,830 --> 00:14:27,700 and now that dad's gone you finally feel free 374 00:14:27,730 --> 00:14:29,470 to explore it, you know? 375 00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:31,600 Kinda like me with my college courses, 376 00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:33,170 and you, I guess, with boys. 377 00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,670 Mom, I told you. 378 00:14:34,700 --> 00:14:37,170 We thought it was the girls' locker room. 379 00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,610 Just let me out! 380 00:14:38,640 --> 00:14:40,410 I can walk to dad's from here. 381 00:14:45,520 --> 00:14:49,020 If you wanna talk, I'm here for you. 382 00:14:49,050 --> 00:14:50,650 [Cell phone chime] 383 00:14:50,690 --> 00:14:53,290 - Hi, Mel. - Joyce, it's me, Melvin Fisher. 384 00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:55,890 I know, that's why I said, "hi, Mel." 385 00:14:55,930 --> 00:14:59,060 I'm as high as a kite. I need you to save me. 386 00:14:59,100 --> 00:15:00,860 Where are you? 387 00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:03,400 I'm either in the attic or the basement. 388 00:15:03,430 --> 00:15:05,200 I took stairs to get here. 389 00:15:10,920 --> 00:15:12,620 Joyce, I'm sorry I yelled at you 390 00:15:12,660 --> 00:15:13,890 for wanting to try pot. 391 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,840 You're right, I'm too uptight. 392 00:15:16,530 --> 00:15:18,900 I blame these suckers. 393 00:15:18,930 --> 00:15:21,900 I overcompensate to feel like I have some kinda control 394 00:15:21,930 --> 00:15:23,530 over my surroundings, you know? 395 00:15:23,570 --> 00:15:24,670 It's okay. 396 00:15:24,700 --> 00:15:26,000 Oh, no. 397 00:15:26,040 --> 00:15:27,640 We missed Henry's surprise party. 398 00:15:27,670 --> 00:15:28,840 [Whispering] It's tomorrow! 399 00:15:28,870 --> 00:15:30,340 [Whispering] Oh, it's tomorrow. 400 00:15:30,380 --> 00:15:33,310 I'm so thirsty. Why am I so thirsty? 401 00:15:33,350 --> 00:15:35,210 Well, there's oj right in front of you. 402 00:15:35,250 --> 00:15:37,280 I'll get you a glass. 403 00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:39,920 Joyce, I have realized something. 404 00:15:39,950 --> 00:15:43,720 I am very difficult. 405 00:15:43,760 --> 00:15:47,760 - I really am. - I wasn't arguing. 406 00:15:47,790 --> 00:15:49,760 This is amazing. 407 00:15:49,790 --> 00:15:52,030 Have you ever tried orange juice? 408 00:15:52,060 --> 00:15:53,700 - A couple times. - I'm gonna... 409 00:15:53,730 --> 00:15:55,330 I'm gonna get you a glass. Will you get me a glass? 410 00:15:55,370 --> 00:15:56,730 Uh-huh. 411 00:15:56,770 --> 00:16:00,540 I think I feel like I have to have control over my life, 412 00:16:00,570 --> 00:16:03,010 and sometimes that makes me control you and the kids. 413 00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:05,110 It's like this. 414 00:16:05,140 --> 00:16:06,880 You want orange juice, 415 00:16:06,910 --> 00:16:09,780 and I am giving you finger juice. 416 00:16:09,810 --> 00:16:11,380 And that's not fair. 417 00:16:11,420 --> 00:16:13,780 I'm sure the acidity kills any of the bad stuff. 418 00:16:13,820 --> 00:16:16,850 - It's a metaphor, Jo-Jo. - [Mouthing words] Jo-Jo. 419 00:16:16,890 --> 00:16:19,760 The juice is your life, and my finger is all... 420 00:16:19,790 --> 00:16:21,090 Oh, no! 421 00:16:21,130 --> 00:16:22,730 [Whispering] It's tomorrow! 422 00:16:22,760 --> 00:16:24,400 Oh, good. 423 00:16:24,430 --> 00:16:27,360 Yep. Never trying pot. 424 00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:29,770 Mom did a pretty good job at talking dad down 425 00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:31,170 when he was freaking out. 426 00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:34,200 And the next day, he did the same for me... 427 00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:36,010 Not that I was freaking out or anything. 428 00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:40,180 You excited for your birthday, pal? 429 00:16:40,210 --> 00:16:41,680 I don't wanna go blind! 430 00:16:41,710 --> 00:16:43,450 I don't want you to go blind either. 431 00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:44,950 That would mess up our basketball game. 432 00:16:44,980 --> 00:16:47,620 I'm turning 12, and that's when you went blind. 433 00:16:47,650 --> 00:16:49,420 And now it's too late to do anything about it 434 00:16:49,450 --> 00:16:51,920 'cause there's only 7 hours and 22 minutes till my birthday. 435 00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:54,730 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey, Henry... 436 00:16:54,760 --> 00:16:56,330 what I had is not hereditary. 437 00:16:56,360 --> 00:16:59,200 You are not gonna go blind, okay? 438 00:16:59,230 --> 00:17:01,300 How long have you been worried about this? 439 00:17:01,330 --> 00:17:04,570 Not that long. Just like... 440 00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:06,300 five... six years. 441 00:17:06,340 --> 00:17:09,340 Oh, good. So only, like, half your life. 442 00:17:09,370 --> 00:17:12,410 Why didn't you say something sooner? 443 00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:14,280 Because... I didn't want you to think 444 00:17:14,310 --> 00:17:16,750 that I didn't wanna be like you. 445 00:17:16,780 --> 00:17:19,880 Oh, buddy. Come here. 446 00:17:23,090 --> 00:17:25,090 That is the sweetest, 447 00:17:25,120 --> 00:17:27,990 most insane thing I have ever heard. 448 00:17:28,030 --> 00:17:29,730 You thought it would hurt my feelings 449 00:17:29,760 --> 00:17:31,060 that you didn't wanna be blind? 450 00:17:31,100 --> 00:17:33,400 Nobody wants to be blind! 451 00:17:33,430 --> 00:17:35,570 Ha. You think I wanna be blind? 452 00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:37,030 How amazing was this guy? 453 00:17:37,070 --> 00:17:39,270 In my 12 years as his son, 454 00:17:39,300 --> 00:17:40,740 that was the first time I realized 455 00:17:40,770 --> 00:17:42,070 he didn't wanna be blind. 456 00:17:42,110 --> 00:17:43,610 Gimme the ball. 457 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:45,980 The man never complained about it. 458 00:17:46,010 --> 00:17:48,850 Did that damn hoop fall again? 459 00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:51,080 Oh, he complained about everything else... 460 00:17:51,120 --> 00:17:52,680 Help me find the receipt, pal, 461 00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:54,890 'cause we are taking it back! 462 00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:57,820 But never about the blind thing. 463 00:17:57,860 --> 00:18:00,190 Later, while I was up in my room playing video games, 464 00:18:00,230 --> 00:18:02,590 mom and dad gathered all my friends in the basement. 465 00:18:02,630 --> 00:18:04,560 Both: Hey, Mr. Fisher. 466 00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:05,960 Hi, girls! 467 00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:07,700 I like your dog's saddle. 468 00:18:07,730 --> 00:18:10,500 Oh, uh, that's, uh... thank you. 469 00:18:10,540 --> 00:18:11,970 We're going to surprise Henry any minute, 470 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:13,970 so you need to go make up with your father. 471 00:18:14,010 --> 00:18:16,970 Hi, Mel. Uh, I brought Katie over. 472 00:18:17,010 --> 00:18:19,140 Oh, hi, Katie! Kate-a-roo! 473 00:18:19,180 --> 00:18:21,950 ♪ K-T and the sunshine band ♪ 474 00:18:21,980 --> 00:18:25,220 - You two need to talk. - Don't think we do. 475 00:18:26,890 --> 00:18:28,420 You know what, I got this. 476 00:18:28,450 --> 00:18:31,660 Mel, right now, I don't want you to think of me as your wife. 477 00:18:31,690 --> 00:18:33,160 Ex-wife. 478 00:18:33,190 --> 00:18:34,860 - Or you as my best friend. - Done. 479 00:18:34,890 --> 00:18:36,460 I want you instead to think of me 480 00:18:36,490 --> 00:18:38,230 as your emotional interpreter. 481 00:18:38,260 --> 00:18:40,160 - Oh, boy. - Oh, God. 482 00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:41,830 No, no, no. Now let's dig deep here. 483 00:18:41,870 --> 00:18:43,430 I think it was Freud who first said... 484 00:18:43,470 --> 00:18:46,040 - Katie, I am so sorry. - Totally forgiven. 485 00:18:47,610 --> 00:18:50,470 Well, I'm gonna crush those classes. 486 00:18:50,510 --> 00:18:52,610 Ladies! Good to see you. 487 00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:54,610 If you want I can sneak you into the after-party. 488 00:18:54,650 --> 00:18:56,310 Oh, like you snuck into the boys' locker room? 489 00:18:59,450 --> 00:19:03,390 So, Melvin. Let's review. 490 00:19:03,420 --> 00:19:06,160 First, you accuse me of having pot. 491 00:19:06,190 --> 00:19:09,190 I told you it wasn't mine, but did you believe me? 492 00:19:09,230 --> 00:19:11,160 Mm, you did not. 493 00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:12,600 And as it turns out, 494 00:19:12,630 --> 00:19:15,370 not only was it not mine, 495 00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:17,370 it was in fact my mother's. 496 00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:20,670 - She told you. - She can't not tell me. 497 00:19:20,710 --> 00:19:22,940 She also told me that she didn't smoke it 498 00:19:22,970 --> 00:19:25,080 because you did. 499 00:19:25,110 --> 00:19:28,080 Do I have the facts of the case correct, counselor? 500 00:19:28,110 --> 00:19:30,410 Indeed you have. Nicely played. 501 00:19:30,450 --> 00:19:31,750 Mel! It's 7:19. 502 00:19:31,780 --> 00:19:33,120 I need you to go get Henry. Chop-chop! 503 00:19:33,150 --> 00:19:34,650 - Okay. - Yep. 504 00:19:34,690 --> 00:19:37,690 Hey, uh, she also told me why you smoked it... 505 00:19:37,720 --> 00:19:40,260 Something about wanting to be a better parent. 506 00:19:40,290 --> 00:19:42,030 I guess that's sweet. 507 00:19:42,060 --> 00:19:44,630 And weird. But... sweet. 508 00:19:49,430 --> 00:19:50,700 Hey, pal. 509 00:19:50,740 --> 00:19:52,770 Mom called, said there's a fuse out downstairs. 510 00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:54,440 Can you give me a hand? Sure. 511 00:19:54,470 --> 00:19:56,040 Mom and dad thought I was worried 512 00:19:56,070 --> 00:19:58,110 my birthday would get overshadowed by the divorce. 513 00:19:58,140 --> 00:20:00,840 So they threw me a party I'd never forget. 514 00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:02,510 Just need you to show me which fuse it is, buddy, 515 00:20:02,550 --> 00:20:03,910 so we can swap it out. 516 00:20:03,950 --> 00:20:05,720 All: Surpri... 517 00:20:05,750 --> 00:20:07,280 Oh! 518 00:20:07,320 --> 00:20:11,790 Never, ever, ever forget. 519 00:20:13,090 --> 00:20:15,090 [Laughing] 520 00:20:15,130 --> 00:20:18,300 Oh! We got ya, man! Right? 521 00:20:18,330 --> 00:20:20,660 Happy Birthday! 522 00:20:20,700 --> 00:20:23,170 Why are you not wearing a shirt? 523 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,940 Yep. Turns out the only boobs that were seen on my birthday 524 00:20:25,970 --> 00:20:27,870 were mine. 525 00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:33,680 [Upbeat music] 526 00:20:33,710 --> 00:20:35,810 ♪ Are you ready for this, are you ready for this ♪ 527 00:20:35,850 --> 00:20:37,780 ♪ Are you ready for this ♪ 528 00:20:37,820 --> 00:20:39,449 ♪ Are you ready for this ♪ 529 00:20:39,450 --> 00:20:41,450 ☯Synced & Corrected by Seppuku17☯ ❃www.addic7ed.com❃ 38274

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