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1
00:00:04,107 --> 00:00:05,833
- Steph, someone's in cardiac
arrest
2
00:00:05,902 --> 00:00:06,730
down the road!
3
00:00:06,730 --> 00:00:08,456
We need your CPR training,
quick!
4
00:00:08,491 --> 00:00:11,011
- You've got CPR training,
Langdon!
5
00:00:11,528 --> 00:00:15,325
[running footsteps]
6
00:00:15,394 --> 00:00:18,604
- Where [panting]... where are
they?
7
00:00:18,639 --> 00:00:20,882
- Would you look at that?
8
00:00:20,917 --> 00:00:22,850
They must have got better.
9
00:00:22,884 --> 00:00:26,819
But I guess while we're here...
drink?
10
00:00:26,888 --> 00:00:28,683
- Ever since Langdon started
working here,
11
00:00:28,718 --> 00:00:31,479
he's been trying to get me
to go to the pub with him.
12
00:00:31,479 --> 00:00:34,310
One time he gave me a
lift home, and the car
13
00:00:34,344 --> 00:00:37,899
happened to "break down"
in front of the pub.
14
00:00:37,899 --> 00:00:40,350
Once he even staged a
kidnapping.
15
00:00:41,248 --> 00:00:42,663
- [Langdon] Steph, I've managed
to jimmy
16
00:00:42,732 --> 00:00:44,734
the boot open a little.
17
00:00:44,734 --> 00:00:46,770
I can see a pub?
18
00:00:46,805 --> 00:00:48,427
The Yarraville Club!
19
00:00:48,462 --> 00:00:49,566
- [sighing]
20
00:00:49,601 --> 00:00:50,567
[phone slamming]
21
00:00:51,396 --> 00:00:55,089
- Steph? Steph? Steph!!
22
00:00:55,124 --> 00:00:56,159
[car spinning off]
23
00:00:56,159 --> 00:00:57,195
- [muffled] Steph!!
24
00:00:57,850 --> 00:01:00,370
[upbeat music]
25
00:01:18,112 --> 00:01:20,735
- So Miranda Graft has
finally followed through
26
00:01:20,770 --> 00:01:24,981
on her threat to close down
Metro Sexual.
27
00:01:25,015 --> 00:01:28,433
I'm a bit sad, I mean,
we'll keep our jobs,
28
00:01:28,502 --> 00:01:30,159
get sent to other practices,
29
00:01:30,193 --> 00:01:33,300
but ... there's a kebab
shop around the corner
30
00:01:33,300 --> 00:01:35,267
that I've really grown fond of.
31
00:01:35,267 --> 00:01:37,821
That, I will miss.
32
00:01:38,753 --> 00:01:40,583
- [Langdon] They just can't tear
us apart.
33
00:01:40,617 --> 00:01:44,483
We're such a good team, and
I'll miss you sooo much.
34
00:01:44,518 --> 00:01:46,899
- I'll miss you too Lang-Donor.
35
00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:54,079
- Thank you all for coming.
36
00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:56,081
I did suggest holding
this emergency meeting
37
00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,670
down at the pub, but was
met with some resistance.
38
00:01:58,704 --> 00:01:59,843
[laughing]
39
00:02:03,226 --> 00:02:04,503
- Who's this?
40
00:02:04,572 --> 00:02:06,988
- This is Tim, my wonderful new
boyfriend!
41
00:02:07,023 --> 00:02:09,715
- Hello, lovely to meet you
both.
42
00:02:11,510 --> 00:02:13,754
- Isn't that the guy that
came in to go on PrEP
43
00:02:13,754 --> 00:02:15,238
a few months ago?
44
00:02:16,446 --> 00:02:18,068
- It IS that guy.
45
00:02:18,068 --> 00:02:20,036
I was all, whoa, you're
hot, you better be on PrEP.
46
00:02:20,036 --> 00:02:21,348
And he was like, what's this
PrEP thing?
47
00:02:21,382 --> 00:02:23,798
And I was like, oh, it's
only a medicine that
48
00:02:23,833 --> 00:02:25,524
people without HIV can
take to reduce the chance
49
00:02:25,559 --> 00:02:27,216
of getting the virus by up to
99%.
50
00:02:27,250 --> 00:02:28,976
He was like, whoa, you're so
informative.
51
00:02:29,010 --> 00:02:31,151
I was like, whoa. [laughing]
52
00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:35,500
So yes, he was a patient, but
since we're both monogamous
53
00:02:35,500 --> 00:02:38,917
and HIV negative, that
means no more patient-y,
54
00:02:38,986 --> 00:02:42,679
no more PrEP-y. It's ahh...
[laughing]
55
00:02:42,714 --> 00:02:45,268
It's a moral quandary.
56
00:02:45,303 --> 00:02:48,237
- You do realize that it's
losing patients like this
57
00:02:48,271 --> 00:02:50,170
that's going to get us shut
down, yeah?
58
00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:53,069
- Yes, but, Tim here is
going to help us save
59
00:02:53,103 --> 00:02:55,796
the clinic, for Tim... is a
theater...
60
00:02:55,865 --> 00:02:57,591
Actor!
61
00:02:57,625 --> 00:02:59,869
- I would have never expected
that!
62
00:02:59,869 --> 00:03:01,146
- I know!
63
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:04,805
- That's great, but, how's
that going to help us?
64
00:03:04,805 --> 00:03:06,738
- Because we are going to put
on,
65
00:03:06,807 --> 00:03:09,361
an STI awareness musical.
66
00:03:09,361 --> 00:03:10,845
[Gwen cheers]
67
00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:13,641
- We were thinking, what
can Metro Sexual do,
68
00:03:13,641 --> 00:03:15,264
that nobody else can?
69
00:03:15,298 --> 00:03:16,989
- Good patient care.
70
00:03:17,058 --> 00:03:18,301
- Not that.
71
00:03:18,336 --> 00:03:20,200
- Music.
72
00:03:20,269 --> 00:03:21,580
- Come on, think about it.
73
00:03:21,615 --> 00:03:23,962
We put on this musical,
we sell some tickets,
74
00:03:23,996 --> 00:03:26,516
we hand that petition
around, we make some money.
75
00:03:26,516 --> 00:03:28,415
We show Hard Graft that this
clinic is
76
00:03:28,449 --> 00:03:29,864
part of the community.
77
00:03:29,899 --> 00:03:32,384
- And look, I understand you're
skeptical,
78
00:03:32,419 --> 00:03:35,042
of course, but we've written a
song
79
00:03:35,076 --> 00:03:37,009
and I think the proof is in the
pudding.
80
00:03:37,527 --> 00:03:40,703
- [Steph] Langdon, can we?
[piano music]
81
00:03:42,843 --> 00:03:46,847
- ♪ You know that I'm here for
you. ♪
82
00:03:46,847 --> 00:03:51,127
- ♪ And you know that
I'll always be true. ♪
83
00:03:51,161 --> 00:03:53,612
The story is a sci-fi
dystopia where these aliens
84
00:03:53,681 --> 00:03:56,236
called Chlamydians, are
coming to destroy the Earth.
85
00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:58,341
And the Earth represents the
body,
86
00:03:58,376 --> 00:04:01,033
and the Chlamydians represent
chlamydia.
87
00:04:01,068 --> 00:04:02,138
It's very clever.
88
00:04:03,450 --> 00:04:05,900
♪ We will fight off the
Chlamydians ♪
89
00:04:05,935 --> 00:04:08,006
♪ We will fight them to the
death. ♪
90
00:04:08,075 --> 00:04:10,664
♪ We will use Amoxicillin till
they ♪
91
00:04:10,664 --> 00:04:12,459
♪ draw their final breath.
92
00:04:12,459 --> 00:04:13,736
♪ We will fight them on the
beaches, ♪
93
00:04:13,770 --> 00:04:17,809
♪ On the land and on the sea.
94
00:04:17,843 --> 00:04:20,536
♪ We will go down the urethra,
95
00:04:20,570 --> 00:04:22,331
♪ where they burn us when we
pee. ♪
96
00:04:22,365 --> 00:04:23,642
♪ Over to Steph.
97
00:04:23,711 --> 00:04:25,920
[piano plays on]
98
00:04:25,955 --> 00:04:27,819
- Freestyle it, you know.
99
00:04:27,853 --> 00:04:29,786
[piano music]
100
00:04:29,821 --> 00:04:31,581
No idea's a bad idea.
101
00:04:31,616 --> 00:04:33,618
[piano music]
102
00:04:33,652 --> 00:04:36,034
- Tim is amazing, he's so funny,
103
00:04:36,068 --> 00:04:41,039
and talented, and handsome,
and has this, huge...
104
00:04:41,971 --> 00:04:43,421
amount of talent.
105
00:04:44,870 --> 00:04:47,183
But he's trained and I'm
not, so I have to squeeze
106
00:04:47,217 --> 00:04:50,807
in every last minute
of practice I can get.
107
00:04:51,429 --> 00:04:52,637
[clearing throat]
108
00:04:52,982 --> 00:04:55,778
♪ Looks like I've got
some bad news for you ♪
109
00:04:55,812 --> 00:04:57,538
♪ This looks like Herpes
110
00:04:57,573 --> 00:05:01,577
♪ the type is two. [note lingers
on] ♪
111
00:05:01,577 --> 00:05:03,268
- Sorry, could you please--
112
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:08,308
- ♪ Ooooooooo...
113
00:05:13,002 --> 00:05:14,452
It was actually gonorrhea,
114
00:05:14,452 --> 00:05:16,626
but what the hell rhymes
with that? [laughs]
115
00:05:17,972 --> 00:05:19,319
[cars driving by]
116
00:05:20,630 --> 00:05:23,426
- I must know the lyrics
to that goddamn musical
117
00:05:23,461 --> 00:05:25,842
off by heart.
118
00:05:25,877 --> 00:05:28,224
The problem with Langdon is
that once he gets an idea
119
00:05:28,258 --> 00:05:32,193
in his mind, he goes at it 110%.
120
00:05:32,608 --> 00:05:37,475
Like this musical, for
example, and this relationship.
121
00:05:37,509 --> 00:05:39,787
- ♪ There's a man I love,
who's a triple threat, ♪
122
00:05:39,856 --> 00:05:42,307
♪ you might know his name.
123
00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:47,036
♪ He lives a life of theater,
but he does it not for fame. ♪
124
00:05:47,105 --> 00:05:50,073
♪ He's like a William
Shakespeare, ♪
125
00:05:50,142 --> 00:05:53,042
♪ But he goes to a modern day
gym, ♪
126
00:05:53,076 --> 00:05:55,803
♪ He's my special triple threat,
♪
127
00:05:55,838 --> 00:05:59,289
♪ My special guy named Tim.
128
00:06:02,016 --> 00:06:05,261
- Alright, we have sold 11
tickets
129
00:06:05,261 --> 00:06:06,883
for tomorrow night.
130
00:06:06,883 --> 00:06:11,094
- Aah hello...? Check this out!
131
00:06:11,129 --> 00:06:13,200
- Langdon, quick word?
132
00:06:13,234 --> 00:06:15,651
- Sure, better call it a night,
Timmy.
133
00:06:15,685 --> 00:06:16,445
- See you later, Long-dong.
134
00:06:17,756 --> 00:06:19,448
- That's his pet name for me.
135
00:06:19,482 --> 00:06:20,932
- Spare me, please.
136
00:06:21,450 --> 00:06:23,831
I just think we should be
thinking of proper ways
137
00:06:23,866 --> 00:06:25,626
to keep the clinic open.
138
00:06:25,661 --> 00:06:26,903
- This is proper!
139
00:06:26,938 --> 00:06:29,181
I mean, Tim's inviting
all his theater friends.
140
00:06:29,181 --> 00:06:31,839
And! He brought in all these
costumes from his past shows.
141
00:06:31,839 --> 00:06:34,186
- Yeah... shows... [laughs
nervously]
142
00:06:34,255 --> 00:06:35,602
- Come on Steph.
143
00:06:36,119 --> 00:06:39,260
Put some faith in one
of my ideas, for once?
144
00:06:48,269 --> 00:06:49,270
[pills rattling]
145
00:06:49,339 --> 00:06:50,306
- Here, let me help you.
146
00:06:50,375 --> 00:06:53,447
- No, no, no, it's fine,
it's fine, it's fine.
147
00:06:53,482 --> 00:06:55,518
- Are those PrEP meds?
148
00:06:55,518 --> 00:06:58,521
- Yeah, old, old, expired.
[nervous laugh]
149
00:06:58,556 --> 00:07:02,732
Anyway, I've gotta go, have
a good night, good Christmas.
150
00:07:02,767 --> 00:07:04,147
You're off to Bali soon, aren't
you?
151
00:07:04,182 --> 00:07:05,010
See ya!
152
00:07:12,190 --> 00:07:15,987
- Hello, is this West
Brunswick East Sexual Clinic?
153
00:07:16,021 --> 00:07:18,058
North Branch?
154
00:07:18,092 --> 00:07:19,197
Great.
155
00:07:19,231 --> 00:07:21,751
I have a question about
one of your patients.
156
00:07:21,820 --> 00:07:24,651
I did some digging, turns out
Tim has
157
00:07:24,685 --> 00:07:27,274
been sourcing PrEP from another
clinic.
158
00:07:27,308 --> 00:07:32,141
But why would he need PrEP
if he's only boning Langdon?
159
00:07:32,175 --> 00:07:33,694
Hmm?
160
00:07:40,321 --> 00:07:44,843
[audience speaking amongst
themselves]
161
00:07:51,574 --> 00:07:52,955
[gasps]
162
00:07:55,440 --> 00:07:59,686
- There they are, Tim's actor
friends.
163
00:08:02,861 --> 00:08:05,001
[audience chatter]
164
00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:10,628
It's actually quite an audience.
165
00:08:10,662 --> 00:08:12,215
[heavy breathing]
166
00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:15,909
- You!
167
00:08:17,048 --> 00:08:18,843
I know your game!
168
00:08:18,877 --> 00:08:21,466
I called the West Brunswick
East, North branch yesterday.
169
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,572
You're still sleeping around.
170
00:08:23,641 --> 00:08:24,987
- Well, it's not like Langdon
and I
171
00:08:25,056 --> 00:08:26,920
were serious or anything.
172
00:08:26,954 --> 00:08:30,164
- Well, let's just go ask
Langdon that?
173
00:08:30,199 --> 00:08:31,545
- Ahh... Let's not. [nervous
giggle]
174
00:08:32,926 --> 00:08:35,722
- Langdon deserves better than
you.
175
00:08:35,756 --> 00:08:38,621
- Langdon deserves better than
THIS?
176
00:08:38,656 --> 00:08:41,003
Have I mentioned how
many threats I represent?
177
00:08:42,418 --> 00:08:45,386
- Get out, or I'm gonna tell him
178
00:08:45,421 --> 00:08:47,285
right here, right now.
179
00:08:47,354 --> 00:08:50,909
- [sighs] You're such a bitch.
180
00:08:51,876 --> 00:08:54,050
- What did you call me?
181
00:08:54,085 --> 00:08:56,570
- You. Are such. A bi--
182
00:08:56,639 --> 00:08:59,504
[running footsteps]
183
00:09:07,995 --> 00:09:10,998
[singing quietly]
184
00:09:15,831 --> 00:09:18,143
- Langdon.
185
00:09:18,212 --> 00:09:20,007
Tim's leaving.
186
00:09:20,042 --> 00:09:21,837
- What, why?
187
00:09:23,252 --> 00:09:25,081
- He was cheating on you.
188
00:09:25,116 --> 00:09:27,705
He was getting PrEP from another
clinic.
189
00:09:29,914 --> 00:09:32,502
- But, I love him.
190
00:09:32,502 --> 00:09:36,092
- Yeah well, he doesn't love
you,
191
00:09:36,092 --> 00:09:38,785
otherwise he'd respect you.
192
00:09:42,133 --> 00:09:47,621
Hey, I'll let the others
know the show's off.
193
00:09:48,933 --> 00:09:50,555
- No.
194
00:09:51,867 --> 00:09:53,834
The show must go on.
195
00:09:58,667 --> 00:10:00,289
[audience chatter]
196
00:10:03,361 --> 00:10:05,294
- [Langdon] Good evening
everyone!
197
00:10:05,846 --> 00:10:11,162
Welcome to SEX: An STI awareness
musical!
198
00:10:11,196 --> 00:10:14,234
[applause]
199
00:10:14,268 --> 00:10:15,097
[piano music backing track]
200
00:10:27,834 --> 00:10:30,630
[piano music]
201
00:10:31,769 --> 00:10:37,222
- ♪ and you know that
I'll always be true. ♪
202
00:10:37,222 --> 00:10:40,432
[piano music]
203
00:10:42,020 --> 00:10:47,474
♪ Loneliness crushes your soul.
♪
204
00:10:51,340 --> 00:10:55,689
♪ Dig dig dig dig dig dig dig
dig, ♪
205
00:10:55,724 --> 00:10:58,519
♪ Dig dig dig dig dig dig dig
dig, ♪
206
00:10:58,554 --> 00:11:02,420
♪ Dig dig dig dig dig dig dig
dig. ♪
207
00:11:02,454 --> 00:11:05,423
- Gwen, you can sing, get up
there.
208
00:11:05,457 --> 00:11:08,391
- I wish jellyfish; I
don't know the lyrics.
209
00:11:08,426 --> 00:11:10,773
- ♪ dig, dig, dig, dig
210
00:11:10,808 --> 00:11:14,604
♪ To fund the war for sexual
health, ♪
211
00:11:14,639 --> 00:11:19,644
♪ We've been sent here
to dig out the wealth. ♪
212
00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:24,338
♪ Without my love on this
rock here in space, ♪
213
00:11:24,373 --> 00:11:26,927
♪ Loneliness stares in your
face. ♪
214
00:11:26,962 --> 00:11:29,240
[weeping]
215
00:11:29,309 --> 00:11:34,176
- ♪ You know that I'm
always here for you! ♪
216
00:11:34,210 --> 00:11:38,974
- ♪ We're saving the clinic true
blue. ♪
217
00:11:39,008 --> 00:11:43,633
- ♪ Working and toiling to kill
STI's ♪
218
00:11:43,668 --> 00:11:46,188
♪ United together
219
00:11:46,222 --> 00:11:51,124
♪ We stand side by side!
220
00:11:51,158 --> 00:11:54,058
[orchestral music]
221
00:12:10,902 --> 00:12:14,043
[uplifting marching music]
222
00:12:33,200 --> 00:12:34,029
[music ends]
223
00:12:34,615 --> 00:12:37,653
- Viva la clinic!
224
00:12:37,687 --> 00:12:41,001
[Gwen clapping and cheering]
225
00:12:44,867 --> 00:12:46,731
- Awful, terrible.
226
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:49,320
The worst thing I've ever seen,
and I once saw a double bill
227
00:12:49,354 --> 00:12:50,908
of Norbit and Meet Dave at the
cinema.
228
00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:56,534
Nup. This clinic is deader
than Eddie Murphy's career.
229
00:13:05,854 --> 00:13:08,718
- Everyone gone home, even
Graft?
230
00:13:08,753 --> 00:13:10,341
- [quietly] Yep.
231
00:13:12,964 --> 00:13:15,795
[sighs] I can't believe that
lying cheat
232
00:13:15,795 --> 00:13:18,763
was getting PrEP from another
clinic.
233
00:13:18,798 --> 00:13:20,351
- They told you that?
234
00:13:20,385 --> 00:13:21,317
- Yeah.
235
00:13:21,352 --> 00:13:22,836
- I thought they weren't
allowed to divulge
236
00:13:22,836 --> 00:13:24,044
that kind of thing.
237
00:13:24,044 --> 00:13:28,290
You know, like part of the
hippocratic oath or something?
238
00:13:28,290 --> 00:13:30,395
- Yeah!
239
00:13:30,430 --> 00:13:31,845
- Yeah, you're right!
240
00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:36,816
It's illegal, like it's
really, really illegal.
241
00:13:39,094 --> 00:13:42,614
Gwen, I think you might have
just saved Metro Sexual.
242
00:13:43,029 --> 00:13:45,065
- About time.
243
00:13:51,175 --> 00:13:53,971
- Hey, I think we might
be able to stay open,
244
00:13:54,005 --> 00:13:55,317
thanks to Gwen.
245
00:13:55,351 --> 00:13:57,319
- That's good.
246
00:13:59,010 --> 00:14:01,841
Steph, thank you for tonight,
247
00:14:03,739 --> 00:14:06,535
you didn't need to come
up on stage like that.
248
00:14:06,604 --> 00:14:09,296
- Hey. That's um...
249
00:14:09,331 --> 00:14:11,505
That's what mates do.
250
00:14:18,581 --> 00:14:20,756
Hey Langdon?
251
00:14:20,790 --> 00:14:21,964
- Yeah?
252
00:14:24,380 --> 00:14:25,726
- Pub?
253
00:14:28,246 --> 00:14:30,835
[upbeat music]
254
00:14:44,573 --> 00:14:47,852
- Shit, my pole dancing class!
255
00:14:48,680 --> 00:14:51,062
- Pole dancing?!
256
00:14:56,136 --> 00:14:57,724
Pole dancing?
257
00:15:00,347 --> 00:15:02,625
That's pretty cool.
258
00:15:02,660 --> 00:15:06,250
[upbeat music]
18343
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