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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,719 --> 00:00:12,220 Stan, what are you... 2 00:00:12,303 --> 00:00:13,680 It's Saturday. 3 00:00:13,763 --> 00:00:15,724 I thought your spin class was canceled. 4 00:00:15,807 --> 00:00:17,851 I don't know. The alarm's got a mind of its own. 5 00:00:18,935 --> 00:00:20,562 Wait a second. 6 00:00:22,355 --> 00:00:24,816 My God, it's my Peak Day alarm. 7 00:00:24,899 --> 00:00:27,027 I set this years ago. 8 00:00:27,569 --> 00:00:29,612 Why, you ask? 9 00:00:29,904 --> 00:00:33,033 It's all here in my vintage issue of Men's Health. 10 00:00:33,116 --> 00:00:36,870 Aside from correctly predicting Zachery Ty Brian's A-lister career, 11 00:00:36,953 --> 00:00:40,999 it has an article about when a man hits the scientific prime of his life, 12 00:00:41,082 --> 00:00:45,754 his peak, at the third month of his 42nd year. That's today. 13 00:00:45,837 --> 00:00:48,339 What's it say about women? When's my peak? 14 00:00:48,423 --> 00:00:50,425 Good Lord. That would've been ages ago. 15 00:00:50,508 --> 00:00:53,470 And... And stretching far into the future. 16 00:00:56,765 --> 00:00:59,768 Yes, even my obvious lies are at peak performance. 17 00:01:03,146 --> 00:01:05,315 Good morning, USA 18 00:01:06,107 --> 00:01:09,194 I got a feeling That it's gonna be a wonderful day 19 00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:12,405 The sun in the sky Has a smile on his face 20 00:01:12,489 --> 00:01:16,201 And he's shining a salute To the American race 21 00:01:18,787 --> 00:01:22,123 Boy, it's swell to say 22 00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:24,501 Good morning, USA 23 00:01:27,295 --> 00:01:29,714 Good morning, USA 24 00:01:32,842 --> 00:01:36,679 Welcome back to Morning Mimosa with Trish and Suze. 25 00:01:36,763 --> 00:01:41,351 It's time to call some of the men who ghosted Trish after one date. 26 00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:46,648 First up on the list is a humorless little schmuck named Suckboi Tony. 27 00:01:47,524 --> 00:01:48,817 - Hey! - Come on. 28 00:01:48,900 --> 00:01:49,901 What the? 29 00:01:49,984 --> 00:01:52,737 It's time for a thrilling Stannouncement. 30 00:01:53,404 --> 00:01:56,282 Today I have officially hit Peak Stan. 31 00:01:56,366 --> 00:01:59,702 Everything at this moment in my life is hitting its stride. 32 00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:00,912 I've got it all. 33 00:02:00,995 --> 00:02:04,624 Wonderful wife, great kids. Fridge in the garage. 34 00:02:04,707 --> 00:02:09,045 A blend of faculties and experience that are in total sync. 35 00:02:09,879 --> 00:02:10,880 Cool, Dad. Great. 36 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:13,341 Speak up, my boy! Can't hear you up at the peak. 37 00:02:13,424 --> 00:02:14,968 Can we put the TV back on? 38 00:02:15,051 --> 00:02:18,179 Hayley, is that you? Winds whipping like a mother up here. 39 00:02:18,263 --> 00:02:19,347 Be careful, Stan. 40 00:02:19,430 --> 00:02:22,642 As they are constantly saying on the series The Crown, 41 00:02:22,725 --> 00:02:25,562 "Heavy is the head that wears the crown." 42 00:02:25,645 --> 00:02:26,771 What are you talking about? 43 00:02:26,855 --> 00:02:29,899 I think he's saying that when you're on top of the mountain, 44 00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:32,068 people are going to try to knock you off. 45 00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:33,444 - Right, Klaus? - Right. 46 00:02:33,736 --> 00:02:37,323 Man, you always get me, Francine. 47 00:02:37,407 --> 00:02:38,825 Meet me in the kitchen. 48 00:02:38,908 --> 00:02:40,243 You may be right. 49 00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:42,871 At the peak, I'm most exposed, 50 00:02:42,954 --> 00:02:44,247 but also at the peak, 51 00:02:44,330 --> 00:02:47,542 I can see my enemies coming in every direction. 52 00:02:47,625 --> 00:02:50,420 I can also see them not able to handle the altitude. 53 00:02:50,503 --> 00:02:52,255 Should have hired a Sherpa, haters. 54 00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:54,215 Come on, honey, let's go to the grocery store. 55 00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:58,720 I want you to see what it's like when a man at his peak buys baked beans. 56 00:03:04,767 --> 00:03:08,146 So, Roger, if you need pointers on how to maximize free samples 57 00:03:08,229 --> 00:03:11,357 without these crummy farmers giving you crap, just ask. 58 00:03:11,441 --> 00:03:12,984 We do this a lot. 59 00:03:13,067 --> 00:03:15,987 I like to grab a sample, take a little lap, 60 00:03:16,070 --> 00:03:19,073 come back and pretend I'm a different talking fish. 61 00:03:19,157 --> 00:03:22,202 - That was my tip. I told you that. - No, you didn't. 62 00:03:22,285 --> 00:03:26,080 My oma taught me that when I was a young ski jumper in Düsseldorf. 63 00:03:26,164 --> 00:03:27,999 Are you with me right now? 64 00:03:28,082 --> 00:03:30,084 How did I end up in this grouping? 65 00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:32,128 I feel like I got put on the practice squad. 66 00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:33,338 Whoa. 67 00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:36,382 Four bucks for one apple? 68 00:03:36,466 --> 00:03:38,301 That's robbery. I'll give $2. 69 00:03:38,426 --> 00:03:40,345 They're $4. We have samples if you... 70 00:03:40,428 --> 00:03:42,388 No, I'm not trying anything. 71 00:03:42,472 --> 00:03:44,515 I am in control of this negotiation. 72 00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:46,726 - Take the sample. - What is he doing? 73 00:03:46,809 --> 00:03:47,810 Is it even good? 74 00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:49,145 The best you'll ever have. 75 00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:52,899 See? Now you've overplayed your hand and just lost a customer. 76 00:03:52,982 --> 00:03:54,275 I'm walking away. 77 00:03:54,359 --> 00:03:55,693 Adiós, señor. 78 00:03:56,611 --> 00:03:58,488 Still got any of those apples? 79 00:04:00,740 --> 00:04:02,659 Sucker. That's a fiver. 80 00:04:03,701 --> 00:04:05,119 This is gonna be amazing. 81 00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:06,204 People forget, 82 00:04:06,287 --> 00:04:09,707 but apples can go toe-to-toe with any fruit out there. 83 00:04:09,791 --> 00:04:12,919 Well, not peaches, plums, pears, pomegranates, pineapples... 84 00:04:13,002 --> 00:04:14,087 and those are just the Ps. 85 00:04:14,170 --> 00:04:15,546 But a good apple is good. 86 00:04:15,630 --> 00:04:17,131 What are you waiting for? 87 00:04:17,215 --> 00:04:18,591 Get to munching, bro. 88 00:04:18,675 --> 00:04:21,261 No, I paid out the ass for this thing. 89 00:04:21,344 --> 00:04:25,265 The setting must be perfect. Every single bite has to be savored. 90 00:04:25,348 --> 00:04:27,058 My hands are empty. Why are they empty? 91 00:04:27,141 --> 00:04:29,060 I dropped the apple. When did I drop the apple? 92 00:04:29,143 --> 00:04:31,938 There it goes! 93 00:04:34,065 --> 00:04:36,359 It went into that tiny sinkhole. 94 00:04:36,484 --> 00:04:39,821 I know. I thought for sure it would go into that one. 95 00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:46,828 Say "peak." 96 00:04:47,954 --> 00:04:51,249 I'm ready now. I'm thinking about a prime fillet. 97 00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:52,834 You offering any discounts? 98 00:04:52,917 --> 00:04:54,210 I've hit my peak, see. 99 00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:57,547 Congrats there, friend, 'cause it's all downhill from here. 100 00:04:59,924 --> 00:05:00,925 Wait. 101 00:05:01,009 --> 00:05:03,928 Wait, what do you mean? Don't you get it? I'm at my peak. 102 00:05:04,012 --> 00:05:06,472 Sure, but once you've gone all the way up, 103 00:05:06,556 --> 00:05:09,600 - there's nowhere to go but... - Farther up? 104 00:05:09,684 --> 00:05:11,728 How about a dry-aged steak? 105 00:05:11,811 --> 00:05:15,440 Dry? Aged? Is that what I look like to you? 106 00:05:15,523 --> 00:05:17,775 Hey, I couldn't help but notice you, 107 00:05:17,859 --> 00:05:21,237 and I had to ask, what's your number? 108 00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:25,199 - Tom. - Hey, are you hitting on my wife? 109 00:05:25,283 --> 00:05:28,369 I was just joking about what number she was in line. 110 00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:31,914 Tom, your horniness is a problem for our business. 111 00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:35,668 Everybody's coming for me. They smell blood in the water. 112 00:05:36,127 --> 00:05:37,962 You're reading way too much into this. 113 00:05:38,046 --> 00:05:41,341 This is rich. Even the flyer guy thinks I'm weak. 114 00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:44,469 Stan, they're on every car. 115 00:05:45,678 --> 00:05:47,138 I'm not weak! 116 00:05:47,388 --> 00:05:49,223 All right. Update on the peak. 117 00:05:49,307 --> 00:05:51,476 My enemies think I'm on the down slope. 118 00:05:51,559 --> 00:05:54,270 And thank you for warning me. Your loyalty will be rewarded. 119 00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:56,105 We were just teasing, Stan. 120 00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:58,858 - I wasn't even listening. - Don't take this the wrong way, Dad, 121 00:05:58,941 --> 00:06:02,236 but other people don't spend a lot of time thinking about your life. 122 00:06:02,403 --> 00:06:05,239 Maybe, but let me bounce an idea back at you. 123 00:06:05,323 --> 00:06:06,449 I am Tom Brady. 124 00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:11,120 People are jealous and dying to see me lose. 125 00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:14,791 But like Tom, I'm starting an anti-aging regimen. 126 00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:18,127 Goop lotions and serums, removing nightshades from my diet, 127 00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:20,380 and daily brain training, like the crossword. 128 00:06:21,547 --> 00:06:23,883 I don't know any of these. Point is, with this regimen, 129 00:06:23,966 --> 00:06:28,221 I can take my peak and turn it into a mesa. 130 00:06:28,304 --> 00:06:30,139 Flat greatness forever. 131 00:06:30,264 --> 00:06:33,684 Stan, I think you're going about this all wrong. 132 00:06:33,768 --> 00:06:36,354 And honestly, being pretty narcissistic. 133 00:06:36,437 --> 00:06:37,522 Narcissistic? 134 00:06:37,605 --> 00:06:40,191 I'm thinking about other people and how they think of me. 135 00:06:43,611 --> 00:06:44,612 Him again. 136 00:06:50,451 --> 00:06:52,912 My curiosity is piqued. 137 00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:56,249 Hi there, Stan. I'm Dr. Revànche. 138 00:06:56,332 --> 00:06:58,751 Like I said to the tech, I don't wanna do anything crazy. 139 00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:00,336 - Just... - Freeze the peak? 140 00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:03,005 You came to the right place. Look what I can do. 141 00:07:05,258 --> 00:07:06,592 Damn, son. 142 00:07:06,676 --> 00:07:09,679 Bring a bucket and mop. Am I right? 143 00:07:09,762 --> 00:07:12,014 But if I can be serious, this is moving fast. 144 00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:14,809 Maybe a tiny bit of Botox to freshen up instead? 145 00:07:14,892 --> 00:07:16,519 Of course. Let's start small. 146 00:07:19,605 --> 00:07:21,065 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 147 00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:23,109 That's the needle you use for Botox? 148 00:07:23,192 --> 00:07:25,570 This is the needle I use for heart paralysis. 149 00:07:25,820 --> 00:07:27,488 - Aah! - I'm a bad guy. 150 00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:30,450 That's honest, at least. 151 00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:43,504 Hello, Stan. 152 00:07:46,382 --> 00:07:49,010 What did you do to me? 153 00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:53,222 Stan, don't worry. You're gonna love your new face. 154 00:07:54,056 --> 00:07:56,225 Although your old one is pretty nice, too. 155 00:07:56,601 --> 00:07:58,561 You were right. 156 00:07:58,644 --> 00:08:00,438 Someone was coming for you. 157 00:08:00,521 --> 00:08:01,564 It was me. 158 00:08:01,647 --> 00:08:05,401 I started with your face. But trust me, it doesn't end there. 159 00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:08,321 I'm gonna take your whole life. 160 00:08:12,450 --> 00:08:16,162 Aah! My God, this is crazy! 161 00:08:16,245 --> 00:08:18,789 And what is going on with my voice? 162 00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:23,169 I also switched out your larynx with that guy's. 163 00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:24,712 And I love it. 164 00:08:24,795 --> 00:08:27,298 Good morning, alleyway 165 00:08:32,887 --> 00:08:35,848 My beautiful face, my beautiful voice. 166 00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:37,975 That doctor changed everything. 167 00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:39,060 My God! 168 00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:40,728 Right. I guess it's the same. 169 00:08:40,811 --> 00:08:44,440 My God, what are you even going on about? 170 00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:47,235 - Sorry. I was talking to myself. - So was I. 171 00:08:47,318 --> 00:08:49,487 Not everything revolves around you. 172 00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:52,281 No. 173 00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:54,242 No. Lose the hat. 174 00:08:54,325 --> 00:08:55,868 You're right. It's too much. 175 00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:02,083 Okay. We are a family at the table. 176 00:09:02,166 --> 00:09:04,377 It is time for a meal. 177 00:09:04,460 --> 00:09:05,628 - Yeah. - Good summary, Dad. 178 00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:07,255 What's going on with your voice? 179 00:09:07,338 --> 00:09:11,342 It's peaking along with the rest of me. It's like a second puberty. 180 00:09:11,425 --> 00:09:13,261 There's a second puberty? 181 00:09:13,553 --> 00:09:15,179 No. 182 00:09:15,846 --> 00:09:17,306 Got you! 183 00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:20,393 I said that way too soon. 184 00:09:20,476 --> 00:09:22,270 Stay where you are! I said "got you"! 185 00:09:22,353 --> 00:09:23,896 - Cop tackle! - Let me go! 186 00:09:23,980 --> 00:09:26,732 Who is that? And why are they here? 187 00:09:26,816 --> 00:09:28,776 I asked them to stake out the house. 188 00:09:28,859 --> 00:09:32,572 I noticed this man following me and was afraid he might... 189 00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:35,199 come for my home and family. 190 00:09:35,366 --> 00:09:40,246 Lies! He's not who you think he is. He stole my face and my voice. 191 00:09:40,329 --> 00:09:41,539 I'm Stan, not him. 192 00:09:41,622 --> 00:09:43,207 How do you explain this, then? 193 00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:44,584 Can't fake that. 194 00:09:44,667 --> 00:09:46,460 You've got to believe me. 195 00:09:46,544 --> 00:09:48,504 I just went to the doctor to get Botox. 196 00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:51,257 You know, to preserve my peak. And maybe some lip filler. 197 00:09:51,340 --> 00:09:53,342 I'll give you some lip filler. 198 00:09:53,467 --> 00:09:56,095 He said "lip." Why didn't you punch him in the mouth? 199 00:09:56,178 --> 00:09:57,680 Duh. Of course. 200 00:09:57,763 --> 00:10:00,141 Hey, buddy, say that sweet, sweet setup line again. 201 00:10:00,224 --> 00:10:03,686 Come on. If we retrace my steps, I can show you how he did it all. 202 00:10:03,811 --> 00:10:04,937 Blammo! 203 00:10:05,980 --> 00:10:07,106 Okay, let's go. 204 00:10:08,065 --> 00:10:09,942 I don't think it's coming back. 205 00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:11,902 - Let's just get another apple. - No. 206 00:10:11,986 --> 00:10:15,406 That was a once-in-a-lifetime deal. I'm eating that apple. 207 00:10:15,489 --> 00:10:17,867 - You can't fit in there. - Sure I can. 208 00:10:17,950 --> 00:10:20,202 Been in a weight-loss contest with college friends, 209 00:10:20,286 --> 00:10:21,662 so I'm slim right now. 210 00:10:21,746 --> 00:10:23,039 Slacked off bad the first week, 211 00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:25,791 got chicken carbonara from Domino's, like, 11 times. 212 00:10:25,875 --> 00:10:27,835 But this week I've only had coffee. 213 00:10:28,502 --> 00:10:31,297 Okay. It's tight, but not so bad. 214 00:10:33,924 --> 00:10:36,093 No, I'm stuck. Pull me out! 215 00:10:36,177 --> 00:10:38,512 Pull me out! I don't want to do this anymore. 216 00:10:43,142 --> 00:10:44,143 Dude! 217 00:10:44,602 --> 00:10:48,439 I lied. I had four Clif bars and a tub of strawberry frosting this morning. 218 00:10:50,983 --> 00:10:52,026 He did it! 219 00:10:52,109 --> 00:10:54,945 Hey. Okay, it's way down there. I'll be back. 220 00:10:55,029 --> 00:10:57,198 If you don't hear from me in a week, um... 221 00:10:57,281 --> 00:10:59,241 Just give up. Move on with your lives. 222 00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:00,451 We'll all be fine. 223 00:11:03,162 --> 00:11:05,081 Just ahead is Dr. Revànche's office. 224 00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:07,625 You'll see where that monster duped me and drugged me 225 00:11:07,708 --> 00:11:10,044 and set his twisted plan in motion. 226 00:11:10,127 --> 00:11:11,379 Buddy, it's empty. 227 00:11:12,046 --> 00:11:13,047 I don't get it. 228 00:11:13,130 --> 00:11:16,092 Just yesterday, this was a fully-functioning doctor's office. 229 00:11:16,175 --> 00:11:18,803 I mean, his receptionist, Susan, sat right there. 230 00:11:18,886 --> 00:11:19,970 She had a gruff exterior, 231 00:11:20,054 --> 00:11:22,306 but she went to bat for me with my insurance company. 232 00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:25,226 Real Stan, why are we indulging this guy? 233 00:11:25,309 --> 00:11:29,522 We're trying to appease a crazy person because he knows where we live. 234 00:11:29,605 --> 00:11:30,690 Plus, it's funny, right? 235 00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:34,110 I know! He put his ads everywhere on my drive to work. I'll show you! 236 00:11:37,196 --> 00:11:41,283 I swear, he had five ads in a row. He couldn't have gotten rid of them all. 237 00:11:43,994 --> 00:11:44,995 Sir? 238 00:11:45,079 --> 00:11:47,915 You've peeled these ads all the way back to old Hollywood. 239 00:11:47,998 --> 00:11:50,334 Wait. The flyer on my windshield. 240 00:11:50,418 --> 00:11:51,419 Follow me! 241 00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:56,298 I tossed it down here. Is this it? 242 00:11:56,507 --> 00:11:57,967 No, just a lotto ticket. 243 00:11:58,050 --> 00:12:00,010 Ooh, someone left a box unscratched. 244 00:12:00,094 --> 00:12:01,512 Nope, that was just bird shit. 245 00:12:01,595 --> 00:12:03,055 Can we just arrest this clown? 246 00:12:03,180 --> 00:12:06,058 Say, this guy is clearly going through something. 247 00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:08,519 You know, maybe I can just talk some sense into him. 248 00:12:08,602 --> 00:12:09,603 I speak clown. 249 00:12:11,522 --> 00:12:13,607 Why are you doing this? 250 00:12:13,691 --> 00:12:15,568 You don't remember me, do you? 251 00:12:15,651 --> 00:12:17,570 Let me freshen your memory. 252 00:12:17,695 --> 00:12:22,283 Many years ago, I placed a bid on my dream home. 253 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:25,494 But I had competition. 254 00:12:27,788 --> 00:12:28,998 You. 255 00:12:30,875 --> 00:12:34,837 So the sellers asked each of us to write a letter to help them decide. 256 00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:38,966 I put my heart and soul into that letter. 257 00:12:39,049 --> 00:12:42,136 But you must have put more, because you got the house. 258 00:12:42,219 --> 00:12:43,512 And at the time, 259 00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:47,308 I still believed the world was a fair place. 260 00:12:47,975 --> 00:12:49,560 Later on, I ran into the sellers, 261 00:12:49,643 --> 00:12:53,481 who informed me that they only received one letter. 262 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:55,441 Look familiar? 263 00:12:56,984 --> 00:13:01,405 "I like house. Want to live there bad. Other guy seems like douche." 264 00:13:01,489 --> 00:13:03,449 This is good. How come you didn't get the house? 265 00:13:03,532 --> 00:13:04,950 That was the letter you wrote! 266 00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:08,037 I don't know how you did it, but I know you made my letter disappear. 267 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:09,121 Good instincts. 268 00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:11,415 It was definitely me. 269 00:13:11,499 --> 00:13:13,292 I took it and made a clean getaway. 270 00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:16,420 After that, I was enraged. 271 00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:18,923 I became consumed. 272 00:13:19,006 --> 00:13:22,134 My wife couldn't dedicate herself to a life of revenge. 273 00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:27,181 So I ended it, and soon I discovered your weakness. 274 00:13:27,681 --> 00:13:28,724 Vanity. 275 00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:32,102 So I planted the Peak Day idea in your head 276 00:13:32,186 --> 00:13:35,314 and led you into my arms. 277 00:13:35,481 --> 00:13:36,482 After med school, 278 00:13:36,565 --> 00:13:38,776 a plastic surgery residency in North Dakota, 279 00:13:38,859 --> 00:13:41,362 and a couple years keeping my sister's sandwich shop 280 00:13:41,445 --> 00:13:42,571 afloat in Woodstock. 281 00:13:43,906 --> 00:13:46,992 And now, I have what's rightfully mine. 282 00:13:47,076 --> 00:13:51,747 The house and the family I never got the chance to start. 283 00:13:56,168 --> 00:13:58,546 A security camera. That'll prove everything. 284 00:13:58,921 --> 00:14:01,298 I can't get through to this guy. Arrest him! 285 00:14:06,512 --> 00:14:09,223 - We'll never catch him. - He had a crazy head start. 286 00:14:09,431 --> 00:14:11,267 He probably ran track. 287 00:14:11,433 --> 00:14:14,728 And now, I have what's rightfully mine. 288 00:14:14,812 --> 00:14:19,525 The house and the family I never got the chance to start. 289 00:14:19,608 --> 00:14:21,819 See? Told you it was me, old friend. 290 00:14:21,902 --> 00:14:23,696 My God! You are you. 291 00:14:23,779 --> 00:14:25,406 You look good, Stan. 292 00:14:25,489 --> 00:14:27,032 Get a bucket and a mop. 293 00:14:27,116 --> 00:14:29,451 The voice is sexy, too. 294 00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:31,662 Say "banana." 295 00:14:31,745 --> 00:14:34,456 No! Stop making eyes at me and listen. 296 00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:37,585 I've been in hell, but you can save my soul. 297 00:14:37,668 --> 00:14:39,712 You're the linchpin to my whole plan. 298 00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:42,089 I'm a great linchpin. 299 00:14:42,172 --> 00:14:46,719 Reliable, strong, sexy, charming when I need to be. 300 00:14:46,802 --> 00:14:51,891 Ooh! And if your plan involves walking, I got a great new set of sneakers. 301 00:14:51,974 --> 00:14:54,351 Comfortable, good price, brown. 302 00:14:54,435 --> 00:14:56,437 And they got the longest laces, Stan. 303 00:14:56,520 --> 00:14:58,731 Shh. Less, Tuttle. 304 00:14:59,648 --> 00:15:01,317 Got ya. 305 00:15:03,777 --> 00:15:04,778 Got it. 306 00:15:04,862 --> 00:15:06,322 Lost it. 307 00:15:06,405 --> 00:15:07,615 Got it. 308 00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:11,035 Nope. Got it! Got it. Yes. 309 00:15:11,118 --> 00:15:12,953 Can't hardly see a thing in here. 310 00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:15,706 An orange? 311 00:15:15,789 --> 00:15:17,666 I don't want this. 312 00:15:18,834 --> 00:15:20,586 Feel like I should have thrown the orange. 313 00:15:25,215 --> 00:15:27,760 As you can see, I've got some heat on me right now. 314 00:15:27,843 --> 00:15:29,803 So I need you to take this tape 315 00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:32,848 and show my family I am who I say I am. 316 00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,475 I think I'm getting a blister. 317 00:15:34,558 --> 00:15:37,311 Maybe I should go home and get a Band-Aid. 318 00:15:37,394 --> 00:15:38,687 Just go. 319 00:15:39,980 --> 00:15:41,941 I'm starting to panic, Stan! 320 00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:43,651 Stop turning around and talking to me! 321 00:15:43,734 --> 00:15:45,861 Did that guy just step out of the bushes? 322 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,280 Yeah, and now he's talking to 'em. 323 00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:51,533 - Yeah. Think we should check it out? - Nah. 324 00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:54,495 Now he's crawling back into the bushes. Just a nature freak. 325 00:16:01,335 --> 00:16:03,837 My God, he's got my family! 326 00:16:03,921 --> 00:16:06,840 Looks like the Smiths are going on vacation. 327 00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:07,967 Let's check the scanner. 328 00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:10,302 Officer Black, Caruso, where have you been? 329 00:16:10,386 --> 00:16:11,845 Officer down at Sixth Street and... 330 00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:15,474 It's always bad news with that guy. 331 00:16:15,557 --> 00:16:16,684 Tell me about it. 332 00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:18,519 Let's go get some ice cream. 333 00:16:26,068 --> 00:16:27,611 They're still gone. 334 00:16:27,695 --> 00:16:30,572 We need to look for clues to where he might be going. 335 00:16:31,031 --> 00:16:32,241 Is this something? 336 00:16:32,324 --> 00:16:34,410 Yes, that's an iPad. 337 00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:35,619 I mean this. 338 00:16:36,787 --> 00:16:37,788 My God. 339 00:16:37,913 --> 00:16:39,498 Why would he do this to her? 340 00:16:40,374 --> 00:16:42,459 He's going to do surgeries on them. 341 00:16:42,543 --> 00:16:44,211 That godless monster. 342 00:16:44,294 --> 00:16:46,380 Actually, Steve might be able to pull this off. 343 00:16:46,463 --> 00:16:47,464 No! Must find them. 344 00:16:47,548 --> 00:16:49,591 Okay, Stan. I'll go get my car. 345 00:16:49,675 --> 00:16:51,010 Quiet! Let me think. 346 00:16:51,093 --> 00:16:52,094 Where? 347 00:16:52,177 --> 00:16:54,179 I remember him testing the tools. 348 00:16:55,389 --> 00:16:59,101 There was a bird... And a bridge. 349 00:17:00,644 --> 00:17:02,104 A rickety wooden bridge. 350 00:17:02,187 --> 00:17:04,398 Tuttle, where's the closest rickety wooden bridge? 351 00:17:04,481 --> 00:17:07,901 There's a pretty solid one over at the library. 352 00:17:07,985 --> 00:17:09,820 Rickety, for Christ's sakes. 353 00:17:09,903 --> 00:17:12,823 There's one at the Japanese Tea Garden. 354 00:17:12,906 --> 00:17:14,742 Yes! You're a genius! 355 00:17:15,743 --> 00:17:17,536 You absolute fool! 356 00:17:17,619 --> 00:17:18,954 This is not it. 357 00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:22,458 I think... It's not a bridge, 358 00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:25,169 but there's a rickety dock at the marina. 359 00:17:25,461 --> 00:17:27,296 The bridge was a dock. 360 00:17:27,379 --> 00:17:29,089 The bird was a seagull. 361 00:17:29,173 --> 00:17:31,175 Yes! I was on a boat! 362 00:17:31,258 --> 00:17:33,802 That explains this barnacle that's been stuck on me for days. 363 00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:34,887 Let's go. 364 00:17:40,517 --> 00:17:42,478 He must have them on one of these boats. 365 00:17:42,686 --> 00:17:45,939 Some kind of, I don't know, surgery boat. 366 00:17:46,023 --> 00:17:49,318 - Do you know which one? - It could literally be any of these. 367 00:17:49,401 --> 00:17:52,154 Surgery boat Surgery boat 368 00:17:52,237 --> 00:17:54,948 Cutting up faces on a surgery boat 369 00:17:55,032 --> 00:17:59,161 It's the eighth row over And the third boat down 370 00:17:59,244 --> 00:18:00,245 We'll never find them 371 00:18:00,329 --> 00:18:02,206 if we stand around listening to this guy sing. 372 00:18:02,289 --> 00:18:04,291 Let's split up and check the boats one by one. 373 00:18:04,374 --> 00:18:05,459 Go! 374 00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:12,508 Okay. Who wants to go first? 375 00:18:12,591 --> 00:18:15,969 - Please, no. - Please, sir, have mercy! 376 00:18:16,053 --> 00:18:17,054 I'll go. 377 00:18:17,137 --> 00:18:21,016 Always get the first appointment of the day, when the doctor's fresh. 378 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:22,351 Life hack for you kids. 379 00:18:23,268 --> 00:18:25,729 Stop. You guys have to believe me! 380 00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:28,398 That's not the Stan you know. 381 00:18:28,482 --> 00:18:30,692 Yeah. We pretty much figured that out by now. 382 00:18:30,859 --> 00:18:33,403 Will you please just leave me alone? 383 00:18:33,487 --> 00:18:36,281 Listen up, Doc. I'm only gonna say this once. 384 00:18:36,365 --> 00:18:40,577 Fix my son's cheek bones, then get the hell away from my family. 385 00:18:40,661 --> 00:18:42,371 Tell him, Dad. Wait. What? 386 00:18:42,663 --> 00:18:44,581 Looking at you now, 387 00:18:44,665 --> 00:18:46,959 I see that you need a little touch-up. 388 00:18:50,671 --> 00:18:52,214 Nurse, scalpel. 389 00:18:52,297 --> 00:18:54,091 - Still tied up over here. - Right. 390 00:18:54,174 --> 00:18:57,678 I don't care how obsessed you are with me. 391 00:18:57,761 --> 00:18:59,513 You can't have my family! 392 00:18:59,596 --> 00:19:01,140 You don't get it. 393 00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:03,725 I don't want to have your family. 394 00:19:03,809 --> 00:19:07,479 I want to ruin them. Just like you ruined my whole life! 395 00:19:19,783 --> 00:19:20,951 Watch the face. 396 00:19:21,034 --> 00:19:22,452 Obviously. It's mine. 397 00:19:23,871 --> 00:19:26,832 How dare you try to change my family. 398 00:19:26,915 --> 00:19:27,916 Let me tell you, 399 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:32,171 as a plastic surgeon, your family is far from perfect. 400 00:19:32,254 --> 00:19:33,338 You bitch. 401 00:19:33,422 --> 00:19:35,883 Maybe they're not perfect to you, 402 00:19:35,966 --> 00:19:38,552 but I love them all as they are... 403 00:19:38,635 --> 00:19:40,179 Medium-looking. 404 00:19:40,345 --> 00:19:44,433 Except my wife. She's a fox! 405 00:19:52,357 --> 00:19:54,818 Time to face the music. 406 00:19:57,738 --> 00:19:59,156 I'm so sorry. 407 00:19:59,239 --> 00:20:01,491 When I said "I love and accept you as you are," 408 00:20:01,575 --> 00:20:05,162 I realized maybe that's what I've been worried about this whole time. 409 00:20:05,245 --> 00:20:08,916 That once I'm past my peak, you might not love and accept me. 410 00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:10,083 Just untie us. 411 00:20:10,167 --> 00:20:11,627 Hold on. I'm not quite done. 412 00:20:11,710 --> 00:20:14,755 I realize now, though, you'll never give up on me. 413 00:20:15,923 --> 00:20:17,424 On good ol' Stan. 414 00:20:17,507 --> 00:20:19,343 - Take it off. - Jesus! 415 00:20:19,426 --> 00:20:22,512 Get a bucket and a mop. 416 00:20:24,848 --> 00:20:26,475 Glad that's over. 417 00:20:26,808 --> 00:20:28,352 Wait, is it over? 418 00:20:28,435 --> 00:20:30,646 Hopefully, Dr. Calgary can squeeze me in today. 419 00:20:30,729 --> 00:20:33,857 Although I do like carrying around this big old flappy face. 420 00:20:34,650 --> 00:20:36,151 - Stan! - Come on. 421 00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:37,444 I'm kissing your ass. 422 00:20:40,030 --> 00:20:41,073 Someone stop that apple! 423 00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:45,285 - Roger? - Whoa. Look at your face, dude. 424 00:20:45,369 --> 00:20:46,912 What happened to you? 425 00:20:48,163 --> 00:20:50,666 Hey, that's a $4 apple. 426 00:20:57,464 --> 00:20:59,716 What am I doing? I'll just go buy another one. 427 00:20:59,740 --> 00:21:01,740 >>>>oakislandtk<<<<< www.opensubtitles.org 31915

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