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1
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♪♪
2
00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:18,194
♪ I bet we've been
together for a million years ♪
3
00:00:18,218 --> 00:00:24,534
♪ And I bet we'll be
together for a million more ♪
4
00:00:24,558 --> 00:00:27,403
♪ Oh, it's like I
started breathing ♪
5
00:00:27,427 --> 00:00:30,206
♪ On the night we kissed ♪
6
00:00:30,230 --> 00:00:35,445
♪ And I can't remember
what I ever did before ♪
7
00:00:35,469 --> 00:00:43,469
♪ What would we do,
baby, without us? ♪
8
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:51,728
♪ And there ain't no nothing we
can't love each other through ♪
9
00:00:51,752 --> 00:00:57,901
♪ What would we do,
baby, without us? ♪
10
00:00:57,925 --> 00:01:00,394
♪ Sha-la-la-la. ♪
11
00:01:04,998 --> 00:01:06,876
Mom, quick, hide me.
12
00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:09,245
Are you all right?
13
00:01:09,269 --> 00:01:11,014
No, Mom, I'm scared.
14
00:01:11,038 --> 00:01:12,282
What's the matter, Alex?
15
00:01:12,306 --> 00:01:15,208
Did you see a rerun
of The Wizard of Oz?
16
00:01:17,611 --> 00:01:19,956
Are the flying monkeys
after you, Alex?
17
00:01:19,980 --> 00:01:23,726
Ooh, the flying
monkeys are after Alex.
18
00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:24,911
Ooh.
19
00:01:26,887 --> 00:01:28,231
Come on, come on, Mal.
20
00:01:28,255 --> 00:01:29,699
Knock it off.
21
00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:31,601
Ooh.
22
00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:33,636
Ooh, the flying monkeys, Dad.
23
00:01:33,660 --> 00:01:35,138
Ooh.
24
00:01:35,162 --> 00:01:37,140
Elyse!
25
00:01:37,164 --> 00:01:39,642
Honey, stop scaring your father.
26
00:01:39,666 --> 00:01:41,511
He'll be up all night.
27
00:01:41,535 --> 00:01:44,414
Ooh, the flying
monkeys, my pretty.
28
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:46,549
Ah, leave him alone.
29
00:01:46,573 --> 00:01:49,519
He's starting to cry.
30
00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:51,521
Alex, if this is scarier
than the flying monkeys,
31
00:01:51,545 --> 00:01:54,257
I don't want to hear about it.
32
00:01:54,281 --> 00:01:56,341
It's the paper girl.
33
00:01:58,218 --> 00:01:59,729
She sees me walking
down the street.
34
00:01:59,753 --> 00:02:03,700
She pedals her bike
towards me, fast as she can.
35
00:02:03,724 --> 00:02:05,034
When she gets real close,
36
00:02:05,058 --> 00:02:07,003
she throws the paper
right at my head.
37
00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:10,791
Thank God she
doesn't deliver pianos.
38
00:02:12,199 --> 00:02:14,177
Oh, Alex, it just
means she likes you.
39
00:02:14,201 --> 00:02:15,378
When I was little,
40
00:02:15,402 --> 00:02:17,313
that's how I showed
if I liked a boy.
41
00:02:17,337 --> 00:02:20,383
If-if I thought he was cute,
I'd just punch him in the arm,
42
00:02:20,407 --> 00:02:22,485
and if I wanted him
to go out with me,
43
00:02:22,509 --> 00:02:24,087
I'd pull his hair like that,
44
00:02:24,111 --> 00:02:26,022
but if I wanted to
go steady with him,
45
00:02:26,046 --> 00:02:28,324
I'd... I'd knock
him unconscious.
46
00:02:28,348 --> 00:02:30,593
I married her,
47
00:02:30,617 --> 00:02:33,610
and I'm thankful to
be alive to talk about it.
48
00:02:36,323 --> 00:02:37,967
Oh, God, that's
her. I'm out of here.
49
00:02:37,991 --> 00:02:40,688
This is like the Little Archies
version of Fatal Attraction.
50
00:02:43,597 --> 00:02:45,108
Hey, Alex, if you
don't want her,
51
00:02:45,132 --> 00:02:46,930
I'll take her.
52
00:02:49,469 --> 00:02:50,780
Hi, Marla!
53
00:02:50,804 --> 00:02:52,115
What can I do for you?
54
00:02:52,139 --> 00:02:54,384
Um, you owe me two
bucks for the paper and...
55
00:02:54,408 --> 00:02:55,933
I'm in love with your son.
56
00:03:01,715 --> 00:03:03,793
Don't hurt him, Marla!
57
00:03:03,817 --> 00:03:06,929
Well, not till we get there.
58
00:03:06,953 --> 00:03:08,231
Hi, Mal.
59
00:03:08,255 --> 00:03:10,767
Hi. Hi.
60
00:03:10,791 --> 00:03:13,036
Jen, this is the
happiest day of my life.
61
00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:14,904
Being picked to be your
social studies partner
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00:03:14,928 --> 00:03:16,639
is a natural high
unlike any other,
63
00:03:16,663 --> 00:03:18,841
my little Ohio Buckeye beauty.
64
00:03:18,865 --> 00:03:21,377
Simon, listen, I like you,
65
00:03:21,401 --> 00:03:23,579
and it's gonna be fun to
be your project partner,
66
00:03:23,603 --> 00:03:25,982
but you have to stop
calling me those names.
67
00:03:26,006 --> 00:03:29,419
What names are those,
my flaxen-haired dove?
68
00:03:29,443 --> 00:03:31,087
Hi, Simon.
69
00:03:31,111 --> 00:03:32,789
Hello, lovely lady.
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00:03:32,813 --> 00:03:36,259
Your radiance glows
like moonbeams.
71
00:03:36,283 --> 00:03:39,328
Why are you talking
like Omar Sharif?
72
00:03:39,352 --> 00:03:41,264
Life is too short not to.
73
00:03:41,288 --> 00:03:43,266
Tell your sister
the wonderful news.
74
00:03:43,290 --> 00:03:47,303
Simon and I were paired
together for a project at school.
75
00:03:47,327 --> 00:03:49,405
Paired together
by fate, by the gods.
76
00:03:49,429 --> 00:03:51,040
Well, what's the project?
77
00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:53,943
We're supposed to do a
paper on entering the workforce,
78
00:03:53,967 --> 00:03:56,212
so Simon and I got
after-school jobs.
79
00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:57,914
Jennifer, that's great.
80
00:03:57,938 --> 00:03:59,716
Oh, for the first
time in your life,
81
00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:01,417
you'll be earning
your own money.
82
00:04:01,441 --> 00:04:03,286
You'll be able to go
where you want to,
83
00:04:03,310 --> 00:04:04,821
buy whatever
clothes you want to.
84
00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:06,489
I mean, you won't have to rely
85
00:04:06,513 --> 00:04:08,641
on Mom and Dad's
measly little allowance.
86
00:04:12,018 --> 00:04:14,852
Hi, Mom and Dad.
87
00:04:16,223 --> 00:04:18,401
The k... ah, the kettle's ready.
88
00:04:18,425 --> 00:04:20,703
- Kettle's in here.
- Oh.
89
00:04:20,727 --> 00:04:23,322
The sofa... the sofa's ready.
90
00:04:24,865 --> 00:04:26,676
Hmm.
91
00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:29,545
Um, what's this
about getting a job?
92
00:04:29,569 --> 00:04:30,780
Oh, it's for school. Simon and I
93
00:04:30,804 --> 00:04:32,448
are gonna be working
at a fast food restaurant.
94
00:04:32,472 --> 00:04:33,883
Chicken Heaven.
95
00:04:33,907 --> 00:04:35,952
Heaven for chickens
and heaven for me.
96
00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:37,420
I'm gonna be
working side by side
97
00:04:37,444 --> 00:04:39,522
with the alluring
Jennifer Keaton.
98
00:04:39,546 --> 00:04:42,225
Not to mention those
alluring chickens.
99
00:04:42,249 --> 00:04:45,583
Have you noticed how popular
our children are these days?
100
00:04:47,587 --> 00:04:50,700
Alex, I is your woman now!
101
00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:56,606
Hi, Mr. Keaton.
102
00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:58,274
Hi, Marla.
103
00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,290
You're wearing a skirt.
104
00:05:02,502 --> 00:05:04,480
You're also wearing pants.
105
00:05:04,504 --> 00:05:06,315
Is Alex here?
106
00:05:06,339 --> 00:05:07,617
- Uh...
- Oh, hi, Marla.
107
00:05:07,641 --> 00:05:08,985
You look pretty today.
108
00:05:09,009 --> 00:05:11,287
Thank you, Mrs. Keaton.
109
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:12,655
Even wearing a little
blush on your cheeks?
110
00:05:12,679 --> 00:05:14,090
Oh, it's not blush.
111
00:05:14,114 --> 00:05:17,226
It's newsprint from the
Sunday supplement.
112
00:05:17,250 --> 00:05:18,895
Ah, very becoming.
113
00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:25,735
Oh, my God.
114
00:05:25,759 --> 00:05:27,737
Oh, Alex, Alex, be nice to her.
115
00:05:27,761 --> 00:05:30,306
I've never seen a
girl so much in love.
116
00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:32,875
So, Mrs. Keaton, you
gave birth to Alex, huh?
117
00:05:32,899 --> 00:05:33,876
Mm-hmm.
118
00:05:33,900 --> 00:05:35,044
Well, someone had to.
119
00:05:36,469 --> 00:05:39,482
Must have been the most
exciting day of your life.
120
00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:41,651
How was it for you, Mr. Keaton?
121
00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:44,854
Well, Marla, I didn't
give birth to Alex.
122
00:05:44,878 --> 00:05:46,222
I wanted to,
123
00:05:46,246 --> 00:05:49,959
but, uh, I lost the coin toss.
124
00:05:49,983 --> 00:05:51,694
You're pretty.
125
00:05:51,718 --> 00:05:54,552
Scram, kid, I don't go for tots.
126
00:05:55,989 --> 00:05:57,981
Not as pretty as I thought.
127
00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:02,271
I got a present for you, Alex.
128
00:06:02,295 --> 00:06:05,308
Uh, Marla, you-you don't
have to give me presents.
129
00:06:05,332 --> 00:06:06,475
Yeah, I do.
130
00:06:06,499 --> 00:06:08,311
I wanted to give you
something personal.
131
00:06:08,335 --> 00:06:10,513
I got you this because
I couldn't find the jar
132
00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:12,281
that my tonsils were in.
133
00:06:12,305 --> 00:06:14,584
Well-well...
134
00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:16,853
that's a shame.
135
00:06:16,877 --> 00:06:19,755
I saved up my pennies,
my nickels, and my dimes,
136
00:06:19,779 --> 00:06:21,924
and I bought you a $20 bill.
137
00:06:21,948 --> 00:06:24,827
I hope you like it.
138
00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:26,796
Well, Alex,
139
00:06:26,820 --> 00:06:28,550
she sure knows the
way to your heart.
140
00:06:30,857 --> 00:06:32,835
It is a beauty.
141
00:06:32,859 --> 00:06:35,838
Hate to have to give it back.
142
00:06:35,862 --> 00:06:37,240
Yeah.
143
00:06:37,264 --> 00:06:40,564
Well, she should
learn a lesson from this.
144
00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:45,414
Okay, Jen, what's the price
145
00:06:45,438 --> 00:06:47,617
of a heavenly chicken
combo deluxe?
146
00:06:47,641 --> 00:06:49,318
$4.95 plus tax.
147
00:06:49,342 --> 00:06:50,887
Jennifer, you're amazing.
148
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:53,856
You've got the
mind of a chicken.
149
00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:56,392
Thank you, Simon.
150
00:06:56,416 --> 00:06:58,408
You've got the
body of a chicken.
151
00:06:59,853 --> 00:07:02,732
Mallory, mystical
woman of the Midwest,
152
00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:04,433
would test us on giblets?
153
00:07:04,457 --> 00:07:07,256
Okay, how many
giblets in a quart?
154
00:07:09,362 --> 00:07:11,307
You know, Jen, I'm-I'm
really proud of you.
155
00:07:11,331 --> 00:07:13,409
This sounds like a
wonderful place to work.
156
00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:14,644
Well, Dad, it's not exactly
157
00:07:14,668 --> 00:07:16,479
the most prestigious
place in the world.
158
00:07:16,503 --> 00:07:18,080
What are you talking
about, Jennifer?
159
00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:20,783
Chicken Heaven is a completely
highbrow establishment.
160
00:07:20,807 --> 00:07:23,886
Simon, highbrow
establishments don't usually have
161
00:07:23,910 --> 00:07:25,821
a drive-through lane
where your customers
162
00:07:25,845 --> 00:07:29,725
scream their orders
directly into a chicken beak.
163
00:07:29,749 --> 00:07:31,060
And then what happens?
164
00:07:31,084 --> 00:07:33,076
The chicken tells the cook?
165
00:07:40,393 --> 00:07:41,393
Uh...
166
00:07:48,802 --> 00:07:50,780
And 12 cents is your change.
167
00:07:50,804 --> 00:07:52,715
Thank you.
168
00:07:52,739 --> 00:07:54,150
Jennifer...
169
00:07:54,174 --> 00:07:55,885
you're beautiful when
you're making change.
170
00:07:55,909 --> 00:07:59,573
Simon, will you stop
it and get to work?
171
00:08:01,348 --> 00:08:04,093
Excuse me, sir.
172
00:08:04,117 --> 00:08:06,963
Sir?
173
00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:09,398
- Simon, I think he wants you.
- Oh.
174
00:08:09,422 --> 00:08:11,000
Look, you completely
screwed up our order,
175
00:08:11,024 --> 00:08:12,435
and we had to wait 20 minutes
176
00:08:12,459 --> 00:08:14,136
while you made
it in the first place.
177
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:16,138
I am sorry; I'll fix
that right up for you.
178
00:08:16,162 --> 00:08:18,441
Great, and what are we
supposed to do in the meantime?
179
00:08:18,465 --> 00:08:21,510
Would you care for a lozenge?
180
00:08:21,534 --> 00:08:23,512
I'd like to see the manager.
181
00:08:23,536 --> 00:08:26,215
Uh, here she is.
182
00:08:26,239 --> 00:08:29,885
She's the manager?
183
00:08:29,909 --> 00:08:31,520
Oh, she's more than
just the manager.
184
00:08:31,544 --> 00:08:32,922
She's the woman I love.
185
00:08:32,946 --> 00:08:34,657
Simon, stop it. Go
put some fries on.
186
00:08:34,681 --> 00:08:36,559
I'm sorry, sir,
I'll take care of it.
187
00:08:36,583 --> 00:08:37,560
You better.
188
00:08:37,584 --> 00:08:38,928
Hey!
189
00:08:38,952 --> 00:08:40,396
That's no way to talk to her.
190
00:08:40,420 --> 00:08:43,165
Would you like to step outside?
191
00:08:43,189 --> 00:08:45,401
Sure. Would you?
192
00:08:45,425 --> 00:08:48,337
No, I just thought you would.
193
00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:50,539
Simon, you really
got to get it together.
194
00:08:50,563 --> 00:08:51,874
You're really screwing up here.
195
00:08:51,898 --> 00:08:53,609
Now go put some more fries on.
196
00:08:53,633 --> 00:08:55,778
I'm sorry, sir, here you go.
197
00:08:55,802 --> 00:08:57,880
I really don't know why I
keep coming back here.
198
00:08:57,904 --> 00:09:00,616
The service is bad, the
atmosphere is worse,
199
00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:02,685
and the food is inedible.
200
00:09:02,709 --> 00:09:04,854
How about a coupon
for a free meal?
201
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:06,822
Hey, thank you very much.
202
00:09:06,846 --> 00:09:08,838
See you tomorrow.
203
00:09:10,116 --> 00:09:12,695
Did you put the fries on?
204
00:09:12,719 --> 00:09:14,497
Mission accomplished,
my poultry goddess.
205
00:09:16,022 --> 00:09:17,633
Hi.
206
00:09:17,657 --> 00:09:18,768
Welcome to Chicken Heaven,
207
00:09:18,792 --> 00:09:20,736
where you get more
cluck for your buck.
208
00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:23,339
Give me three
heavenly drumsticks...
209
00:09:23,363 --> 00:09:25,808
Ordering three
heavenly drumsticks.
210
00:09:25,832 --> 00:09:26,976
French fries...
211
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,511
Ordering French fries.
212
00:09:28,535 --> 00:09:29,545
Coleslaw...
213
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:31,380
Ordering coleslaw.
214
00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:33,249
The kitchen's on fire.
215
00:09:33,273 --> 00:09:34,750
Ordering the kitchen's on fire.
216
00:09:34,774 --> 00:09:37,720
Is that one of our specials?
217
00:09:37,744 --> 00:09:40,990
No! The kitchen's
on fire, you idiot!
218
00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:44,060
Make that ordering the
kitchen's on fire, you idiot.
219
00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:46,076
Would you like
a drink with that?
220
00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:50,066
Simon, the kitchen's on fire!
221
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:52,501
That's a really popular dish.
222
00:09:52,525 --> 00:09:53,736
Oh, the fries!
223
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:54,970
Simon!
224
00:09:54,994 --> 00:09:57,573
Quick.
225
00:09:57,597 --> 00:10:00,376
Simon, Jennifer,
226
00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:01,877
who's responsible for this?
227
00:10:01,901 --> 00:10:04,780
Can we ever say, in
the philosophical sense,
228
00:10:04,804 --> 00:10:06,749
that anyone is
responsible for anything?
229
00:10:06,773 --> 00:10:09,118
Yeah, watch me.
230
00:10:09,142 --> 00:10:11,987
Look, Mr. Parker, we were
really jammed up with customers,
231
00:10:12,011 --> 00:10:13,289
and I-I think it's possible
232
00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:15,357
that the fries were
left on a little too long.
233
00:10:15,381 --> 00:10:17,179
I will tell you what happened.
234
00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:21,530
This chicken-flicking
nitwit screwed up my order
235
00:10:21,554 --> 00:10:23,732
and ignored my repeated warnings
236
00:10:23,756 --> 00:10:25,534
that the fire was starting.
237
00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:28,971
Will there be anything
else for you today, madam?
238
00:10:28,995 --> 00:10:30,339
This young lady saved the day.
239
00:10:30,363 --> 00:10:33,275
You should be proud of
having her as an employee.
240
00:10:33,299 --> 00:10:34,276
I am.
241
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:36,112
And you should be
ashamed of having him.
242
00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:37,780
I am.
243
00:10:39,172 --> 00:10:40,916
Simon, you're on probation here.
244
00:10:40,940 --> 00:10:42,952
Thank you, sir, I'm honored.
245
00:10:42,976 --> 00:10:46,455
Jennifer, you're real
Chicken Heaven material.
246
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:50,226
I think you have what it takes
to rise to the top of the coop.
247
00:10:50,250 --> 00:10:54,363
No one's ever said
that to me before.
248
00:10:54,387 --> 00:10:58,000
How would you like to
be assistant manager?
249
00:10:58,024 --> 00:11:00,016
Yeah.
250
00:11:07,066 --> 00:11:09,145
So, when did you first
realize that Alex was
251
00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:12,281
the most wonderful human
being in the whole world?
252
00:11:12,305 --> 00:11:15,217
When you told us.
253
00:11:15,241 --> 00:11:17,186
Uh, and before that,
254
00:11:17,210 --> 00:11:20,122
uh, when he told us.
255
00:11:20,146 --> 00:11:21,524
Let's move on.
256
00:11:21,548 --> 00:11:23,726
Now, what's his favorite chair?
257
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:25,494
Well, probably the
one you're sitting in.
258
00:11:27,887 --> 00:11:30,599
Mar... Marla!
259
00:11:30,623 --> 00:11:34,336
Give it back!
260
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:36,705
Let's not tell her
where his bed is.
261
00:11:36,729 --> 00:11:38,574
Mom?
262
00:11:38,598 --> 00:11:39,808
Can you tell Alex
263
00:11:39,832 --> 00:11:41,544
to stop leaving his
plates all over the house?
264
00:11:41,568 --> 00:11:44,299
I found this outside his
door, like room service.
265
00:11:56,416 --> 00:11:58,394
She gone?
266
00:11:58,418 --> 00:12:00,563
Alex, you have to do something.
267
00:12:00,587 --> 00:12:02,097
You have to talk to her.
268
00:12:02,121 --> 00:12:03,332
Yeah, not yet, Mom.
269
00:12:03,356 --> 00:12:05,416
I think she's about to give
me some more money.
270
00:12:07,126 --> 00:12:09,004
Hey, what's with the paper girl?
271
00:12:09,028 --> 00:12:11,574
She's standing on the
corner, staring at a fork.
272
00:12:12,765 --> 00:12:14,577
She's in love with your brother.
273
00:12:14,601 --> 00:12:16,331
No, seriously.
274
00:12:18,238 --> 00:12:20,883
My sister, ladies and gentlemen.
275
00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:22,318
- How was work, honey?
- God, Mom,
276
00:12:22,342 --> 00:12:23,719
it was worse than ever.
277
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,354
I mean, since they made
me assistant manager,
278
00:12:25,378 --> 00:12:27,022
Simon has become
even more of a problem.
279
00:12:27,046 --> 00:12:30,426
We took the job together,
but now I'm his boss.
280
00:12:30,450 --> 00:12:32,094
I don't know what I'm gonna do.
281
00:12:32,118 --> 00:12:33,696
He's completely incompetent.
282
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:36,298
If it were anyone
else, I think I'd fire him.
283
00:12:36,322 --> 00:12:38,901
Yeah, so what's the problem?
284
00:12:38,925 --> 00:12:40,894
Alex, he's my friend.
285
00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:46,242
So what's the problem?
286
00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:47,876
I don't know what I'm gonna do.
287
00:12:47,900 --> 00:12:50,479
Maybe I should just quit,
and get a job at Jiffy Burger.
288
00:12:50,503 --> 00:12:51,680
No, no, no.
289
00:12:51,704 --> 00:12:54,299
I've seen their hats.
290
00:13:00,146 --> 00:13:01,957
Oh. Hi, Simon.
291
00:13:01,981 --> 00:13:03,792
Hi.
292
00:13:03,816 --> 00:13:06,562
Simon, this isn't the army.
293
00:13:06,586 --> 00:13:08,731
You don't have to wear
your uniform off duty.
294
00:13:08,755 --> 00:13:10,165
Oh, I know. But I like it.
295
00:13:10,189 --> 00:13:12,635
So I've incorporated
it into my wardrobe.
296
00:13:12,659 --> 00:13:14,628
Sometimes I wear just
the hat and ski boots.
297
00:13:16,562 --> 00:13:18,793
I'm sorry we had to hear that.
298
00:13:24,270 --> 00:13:25,814
Simon, we have to talk.
299
00:13:25,838 --> 00:13:27,916
Yes?
300
00:13:27,940 --> 00:13:29,585
Simon,
301
00:13:29,609 --> 00:13:31,287
we were paired
together to do a job,
302
00:13:31,311 --> 00:13:32,788
and I don't feel that
you're living up to
303
00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:33,956
your end of the bargain.
304
00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:35,915
What do you mean, pretty lady?
305
00:13:36,949 --> 00:13:38,060
Simon...
306
00:13:38,084 --> 00:13:39,428
I've got a job to do,
307
00:13:39,452 --> 00:13:41,830
and I take that kind of
responsibility seriously.
308
00:13:41,854 --> 00:13:43,399
Now, stop concentrating on me,
309
00:13:43,423 --> 00:13:45,034
and start concentrating
on your job.
310
00:13:45,058 --> 00:13:47,736
What job is that?
311
00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:49,171
Why am I both drawn to you
312
00:13:49,195 --> 00:13:50,673
and repelled by you?
313
00:13:50,697 --> 00:13:51,774
I don't know.
314
00:13:51,798 --> 00:13:53,596
My mother asked the same thing.
315
00:14:00,239 --> 00:14:02,618
Sorry I'm late,
but I'm ready to go.
316
00:14:02,642 --> 00:14:03,642
- Whoa!
- Simon...
317
00:14:05,745 --> 00:14:07,189
Simon, when you're late,
318
00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:08,657
I get in trouble
with Mr. Parker.
319
00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:10,826
Now stop fooling
around and get to work.
320
00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:12,661
I love it when you're bossy.
321
00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:14,930
Simon, I don't want to hear it.
322
00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:15,954
Get to your post.
323
00:14:18,825 --> 00:14:20,536
- You again, Simon?
- No, sir, it was me.
324
00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:22,738
I accidentally
bumped into Simon,
325
00:14:22,762 --> 00:14:24,073
and he knocked the cups over,
326
00:14:24,097 --> 00:14:25,741
and then I asked him
to clean them up for me.
327
00:14:25,765 --> 00:14:27,643
And I'm happy to
do that for her, sir,
328
00:14:27,667 --> 00:14:29,812
because I'm her
knight in shining armor.
329
00:14:29,836 --> 00:14:31,046
Okay, I never had armor,
330
00:14:31,070 --> 00:14:33,215
but I had braces for a while.
331
00:14:33,239 --> 00:14:35,317
You should've had a muzzle.
332
00:14:35,341 --> 00:14:37,186
All right, get back
to work, both of you.
333
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,754
I like that idea.
334
00:14:38,778 --> 00:14:40,456
Jen, I really appreciate
335
00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:41,990
you-you covering for me.
336
00:14:42,014 --> 00:14:43,892
I don't know how to thank you.
337
00:14:43,916 --> 00:14:45,544
Maybe I do!
338
00:14:46,686 --> 00:14:49,865
♪ You are so beautiful ♪
339
00:14:49,889 --> 00:14:51,653
♪ To me... ♪
340
00:14:53,426 --> 00:14:55,088
Thank you very
much. Where you from?
341
00:14:56,863 --> 00:14:59,875
♪ The assistant
manager is so beautiful ♪
342
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,310
♪ To me ♪
343
00:15:01,334 --> 00:15:02,478
♪ Can't you see? ♪
344
00:15:02,502 --> 00:15:04,146
♪ You're everything... ♪
345
00:15:04,170 --> 00:15:05,170
Simon...
346
00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:08,939
Thank you. The
next show is at 3:15.
347
00:15:10,309 --> 00:15:12,020
- Hi, honey.
- What are you guys doing here?
348
00:15:12,044 --> 00:15:14,757
Uh, just came by to
get a little free food.
349
00:15:14,781 --> 00:15:16,558
Alex, I can't do that.
350
00:15:16,582 --> 00:15:17,793
We're out of here, then.
351
00:15:17,817 --> 00:15:19,061
Excuse me, miss?
352
00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:20,496
Miss, hey you! Miss!
353
00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:21,964
Hey, you...
354
00:15:21,988 --> 00:15:23,265
mister.
355
00:15:23,289 --> 00:15:25,901
That's no "miss,"
that's my sister.
356
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,803
Yeah. She's my sister, too.
357
00:15:27,827 --> 00:15:29,638
And you better listen
to him, he's my brother.
358
00:15:29,662 --> 00:15:31,358
Want to meet my parents?
359
00:15:37,670 --> 00:15:39,366
We're them.
360
00:15:42,008 --> 00:15:44,052
And she's right.
361
00:15:44,076 --> 00:15:46,121
You have a problem with her,
362
00:15:46,145 --> 00:15:48,557
you go through us.
363
00:15:48,581 --> 00:15:51,427
You see, if one
of us gets a job,
364
00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:53,929
we all get the job.
365
00:15:53,953 --> 00:15:55,564
You got that?
366
00:15:55,588 --> 00:15:58,634
I just wanted some ketchup.
367
00:15:58,658 --> 00:16:00,402
Jen?
368
00:16:00,426 --> 00:16:02,004
It's over there.
369
00:16:02,028 --> 00:16:03,724
It's over there.
370
00:16:04,997 --> 00:16:06,465
Nice meeting you.
371
00:16:09,101 --> 00:16:10,078
So how's it going, Jen?
372
00:16:10,102 --> 00:16:11,346
See for yourself.
373
00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:25,027
In the true sense of the word,
374
00:16:25,051 --> 00:16:27,043
he is a soda jerk.
375
00:16:29,021 --> 00:16:31,867
Honey, you've got to do
something about Simon.
376
00:16:31,891 --> 00:16:33,335
Oh, just ignore him.
377
00:16:33,359 --> 00:16:34,970
It happens every
two or three hours.
378
00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:36,805
What do you guys want?
379
00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:38,307
Uh, well, Jen, uh...
what do you recommend?
380
00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:39,890
Eating somewhere else.
381
00:16:41,601 --> 00:16:45,614
Look, why don't we try four
of the Wing-a-ling Delights?
382
00:16:45,638 --> 00:16:48,116
No, no, no, I don't want
a Wing-a-ling Delight.
383
00:16:48,140 --> 00:16:50,452
I want...
384
00:16:50,476 --> 00:16:51,808
a... Gizzard Blizzard.
385
00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:57,082
Uh, I'll have the Tub O'Necks.
386
00:17:01,153 --> 00:17:03,999
Ordering three Wing-a-lings,
387
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:05,033
one Gizzard Blizzard,
388
00:17:05,057 --> 00:17:07,603
and one Tub O'Necks.
389
00:17:07,627 --> 00:17:09,071
You know what I'd really like?
390
00:17:09,095 --> 00:17:10,939
A mesquite-grilled,
391
00:17:10,963 --> 00:17:12,875
free-range, boneless
breast of chicken
392
00:17:12,899 --> 00:17:14,510
on a bed of radicchio
393
00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:16,196
with a mustard vinaigrette.
394
00:17:17,470 --> 00:17:21,999
Ordering one Heavenly Slop Pile.
395
00:17:25,645 --> 00:17:26,722
- Simon!
- Oh!
396
00:17:26,746 --> 00:17:28,557
Whoa, whoa, whoa...
397
00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:30,492
Hey!
398
00:17:30,516 --> 00:17:31,960
Whoa!
399
00:17:31,984 --> 00:17:33,462
That's enough!
400
00:17:33,486 --> 00:17:35,011
I've got it under control!
401
00:17:50,369 --> 00:17:51,747
Well...
402
00:17:51,771 --> 00:17:54,216
obviously, I'm not needed here.
403
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:55,717
Jen, uh...
404
00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:57,886
why don't you, uh, lock up
when you leave, all right?
405
00:17:57,910 --> 00:17:59,855
Mr. Parker, can I fire him?
406
00:17:59,879 --> 00:18:01,723
Uh, no. But I can.
407
00:18:01,747 --> 00:18:02,891
Simon!
408
00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:04,315
You're fired!
409
00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:14,617
Where's my Tub O'Necks?
410
00:18:20,066 --> 00:18:22,644
You have a milk mustache.
411
00:18:22,668 --> 00:18:24,330
I like that in a man.
412
00:18:28,841 --> 00:18:30,173
Marla...
413
00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:35,791
Marla...
414
00:18:35,815 --> 00:18:38,293
I'm very flattered...
415
00:18:38,317 --> 00:18:39,761
that you have a crush on me.
416
00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:41,663
Alex, are you gonna tell me
417
00:18:41,687 --> 00:18:44,122
it's not gonna work between us?
418
00:18:45,157 --> 00:18:46,969
Yeah.
419
00:18:46,993 --> 00:18:48,103
Well, fine,
420
00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:49,905
if that's the way
you feel about it.
421
00:18:49,929 --> 00:18:53,108
I can handle this very maturely.
422
00:18:53,132 --> 00:18:55,101
Why not?
423
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:58,604
Shh... Marla, look...
424
00:19:02,208 --> 00:19:04,820
I already have a girlfriend.
425
00:19:04,844 --> 00:19:08,156
And-and... I go to
graduate school.
426
00:19:08,180 --> 00:19:10,125
I mean, I'm twice your age.
427
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,327
Where do you want to
go for the honeymoon?
428
00:19:12,351 --> 00:19:14,343
I like the Poconos.
429
00:19:18,224 --> 00:19:20,335
Marla, it's not
gonna work, okay?
430
00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:22,371
I mean, it's-it's-it's...
431
00:19:22,395 --> 00:19:23,739
it's completely nuts.
432
00:19:23,763 --> 00:19:25,664
I mean, i-it's impossible.
433
00:19:28,567 --> 00:19:31,901
I can't believe I'm wearing
a stupid bow in my hair.
434
00:19:33,239 --> 00:19:34,983
The bow is beautiful.
435
00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:37,019
It is not!
436
00:19:37,043 --> 00:19:38,875
I look like Rose Marie!
437
00:19:41,514 --> 00:19:42,758
That's not true.
438
00:19:42,782 --> 00:19:45,293
Alex...
439
00:19:45,317 --> 00:19:47,786
you've broken my heart.
440
00:19:49,655 --> 00:19:52,267
Look, I don't want to do that.
441
00:19:52,291 --> 00:19:54,569
In a very little while,
442
00:19:54,593 --> 00:19:57,005
you're gonna
forget all about me.
443
00:19:57,029 --> 00:19:59,074
In that case,
444
00:19:59,098 --> 00:20:01,397
I want my 20 bucks back.
445
00:20:03,936 --> 00:20:06,201
There's no reason to
break this off entirely.
446
00:20:10,676 --> 00:20:13,088
A gift is a gift.
447
00:20:13,112 --> 00:20:15,377
Come on, cough it up.
448
00:20:19,819 --> 00:20:20,829
Look, Marla...
449
00:20:20,853 --> 00:20:22,864
any guy your age
450
00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:24,666
would be crazy
not to fall for you.
451
00:20:24,690 --> 00:20:27,069
Get out of here.
452
00:20:27,093 --> 00:20:29,471
I mean it, I mean it,
you know, who knows?
453
00:20:29,495 --> 00:20:30,706
Maybe ten or 20 years,
454
00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:32,674
you're breaking
hearts left and right...
455
00:20:32,698 --> 00:20:34,543
Maybe, uh...
456
00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:36,536
maybe our paths
will cross again.
457
00:20:38,370 --> 00:20:39,599
Bye, Marla.
458
00:20:41,507 --> 00:20:42,517
Wow.
459
00:20:42,541 --> 00:20:45,033
I'll never wash
my forehead again.
460
00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:48,476
Not that I ever did much before.
461
00:20:52,017 --> 00:20:53,428
Hey.
462
00:20:53,452 --> 00:20:54,452
Oh!
463
00:21:03,829 --> 00:21:05,107
How'd it go with Marla?
464
00:21:05,131 --> 00:21:07,042
Kind of rough.
465
00:21:08,067 --> 00:21:09,211
It's okay; she's young.
466
00:21:09,235 --> 00:21:10,212
She'll get over it.
467
00:21:10,236 --> 00:21:11,246
I'm talking about me.
468
00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:13,865
I had to give the 20 bucks back.
469
00:21:18,410 --> 00:21:19,387
- Hi.
- Hi.
470
00:21:19,411 --> 00:21:20,388
Is Jennifer here?
471
00:21:20,412 --> 00:21:21,890
I'll get her.
472
00:21:21,914 --> 00:21:22,924
Ooh...
473
00:21:23,949 --> 00:21:26,762
Well, the secret's out.
474
00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:28,721
I'm a real goofball.
475
00:21:31,190 --> 00:21:32,968
I'll be honest with you, Simon.
476
00:21:32,992 --> 00:21:34,620
That hat's not working for you.
477
00:21:44,436 --> 00:21:45,680
Hi, Jen.
478
00:21:45,704 --> 00:21:47,716
I'm sorry about how
things went today.
479
00:21:47,740 --> 00:21:49,299
I'm here to turn in my uniform.
480
00:21:51,877 --> 00:21:53,121
I'm gonna miss this.
481
00:21:53,145 --> 00:21:55,410
Got a lot of compliments
on it from my therapist.
482
00:21:59,318 --> 00:22:00,762
I'm sorry, Jen. I...
483
00:22:00,786 --> 00:22:03,465
I guess I just got carried away.
484
00:22:03,489 --> 00:22:06,234
See, when I'm around you,
485
00:22:06,258 --> 00:22:07,954
I can't even function.
486
00:22:09,728 --> 00:22:11,373
Simon, you've got to grow up.
487
00:22:11,397 --> 00:22:13,942
I mean, don't you realize
what happened back there?
488
00:22:13,966 --> 00:22:16,444
You could have gotten me fired.
489
00:22:16,468 --> 00:22:18,847
You weren't even
trying to do a good job.
490
00:22:18,871 --> 00:22:20,615
That's not true, Jen. I
wanted to do a good job.
491
00:22:20,639 --> 00:22:22,784
I'm sorry I
embarrassed you, I...
492
00:22:22,808 --> 00:22:25,220
guess I do have to be
a little more responsible.
493
00:22:25,244 --> 00:22:27,856
I just wanted to impress
you, so that you'd like me.
494
00:22:27,880 --> 00:22:29,658
Simon, I do like you...
495
00:22:29,682 --> 00:22:32,379
If you say "as a friend," I'm
gonna spontaneously combust.
496
00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:38,033
Well, then, I guess I'd
better take a few steps back.
497
00:22:38,057 --> 00:22:40,569
As a friend, huh?
498
00:22:40,593 --> 00:22:42,170
Yeah.
499
00:22:42,194 --> 00:22:44,254
I hope you can deal
with that, Simon.
500
00:22:46,031 --> 00:22:47,475
Actually, it's...
501
00:22:47,499 --> 00:22:49,244
like driving a stake
through my heart.
502
00:22:49,268 --> 00:22:50,827
But I can live with that.
503
00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:56,084
Tell me something, Jen...
504
00:22:56,108 --> 00:22:58,353
Would you really have fired
me from Chicken Heaven?
505
00:22:58,377 --> 00:23:00,243
Absolutely.
506
00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:03,225
Would you ever fire
me as your friend?
507
00:23:03,249 --> 00:23:04,249
Never.
508
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:36,892
Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.
32400
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