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1
00:00:09,425 --> 00:00:10,876
Hello.
2
00:00:10,877 --> 00:00:13,161
Hey, it's me. I know you wanted
me to get paper towels.
3
00:00:13,162 --> 00:00:14,462
Did you want me
to get the kinds
4
00:00:14,463 --> 00:00:17,132
with, like, the chickens
and ducks on 'em, or...?
5
00:00:17,133 --> 00:00:18,650
I'll let you
make that call, babe.
6
00:00:18,651 --> 00:00:20,051
Okay, I won't let you down.
7
00:00:20,052 --> 00:00:21,303
Okay, love you. Bye.
8
00:00:21,304 --> 00:00:23,021
Okay, love you too.
Carrie, wait.
9
00:00:23,022 --> 00:00:24,356
Yeah?
10
00:00:24,357 --> 00:00:25,790
I've been thinking
about this whole
11
00:00:25,791 --> 00:00:27,325
automatically saying
"I love you"
12
00:00:27,326 --> 00:00:29,561
at the end
of phone calls thing.
13
00:00:29,562 --> 00:00:32,063
I was wondering
if we could drop it?
14
00:00:32,999 --> 00:00:34,116
What?
15
00:00:34,117 --> 00:00:35,250
Yeah. We know how we feel.
16
00:00:35,251 --> 00:00:36,902
We don't have to say it
every call.
17
00:00:36,903 --> 00:00:38,537
So you want to stop saying
"I love you"?
18
00:00:38,538 --> 00:00:40,238
Technically, we don't say
"I love you" now.
19
00:00:40,239 --> 00:00:42,440
I mean, we've got it
down to, like, "Love ya. "
20
00:00:42,441 --> 00:00:44,326
You know, it's almost gone
already.
21
00:00:44,327 --> 00:00:46,594
Oh, we're talking about just
dropping the "I love you"
22
00:00:46,595 --> 00:00:48,296
just at the end
of phone calls.
23
00:00:48,297 --> 00:00:50,215
For now.
24
00:00:50,216 --> 00:00:52,567
You know what?
It's- It's not a bad idea,
25
00:00:52,568 --> 00:00:54,068
because when we
actually do say it,
26
00:00:54,069 --> 00:00:55,887
it'll mean
that much more.
27
00:00:55,888 --> 00:00:57,172
Exactly. I mean,
it'll really pop.
28
00:00:57,173 --> 00:00:59,007
It'll almost be shocking.
29
00:00:59,008 --> 00:01:00,008
Okay.
All right.
30
00:01:00,009 --> 00:01:02,227
Well, goodbye.
31
00:01:02,228 --> 00:01:04,045
Goodbye.
32
00:01:10,136 --> 00:01:11,436
Hello.
33
00:01:11,437 --> 00:01:13,271
Hey, it's me.
Yeah?
34
00:01:13,272 --> 00:01:15,073
Just wanted to say
I love you.
35
00:01:15,074 --> 00:01:16,908
And I love you too.
36
00:01:16,909 --> 00:01:18,610
All right.
All right, love ya.
37
00:01:18,611 --> 00:01:19,644
Love you too.
38
00:01:57,934 --> 00:02:01,369
Douglas, I'm back
from the senior center
39
00:02:01,370 --> 00:02:04,406
and I have an update
on the missing pudding.
40
00:02:08,294 --> 00:02:10,228
Douglas?
41
00:02:10,229 --> 00:02:11,296
Hmm.
44
00:02:19,104 --> 00:02:20,922
I was fakin' it.
45
00:02:20,923 --> 00:02:23,091
Well, it doesn't get
much lower than that.
46
00:02:23,092 --> 00:02:24,726
Apparently, it does.
47
00:02:24,727 --> 00:02:26,211
You expect me to steal money
from Carrie
48
00:02:26,212 --> 00:02:28,346
to buy her own
birthday present?
49
00:02:28,347 --> 00:02:30,064
I will not
do that again.
50
00:02:33,186 --> 00:02:35,169
When are the Micellis
gonna be done
51
00:02:35,170 --> 00:02:37,973
building that freakin' castle?
I mean, knock yourselves out.
52
00:02:37,974 --> 00:02:40,025
You still share an alley
with the Jiffy Lube.
53
00:02:40,026 --> 00:02:42,227
Hey, we're all set
for your birthday.
54
00:02:42,228 --> 00:02:43,928
I just talked to Paddy
down at Cooper's.
55
00:02:43,929 --> 00:02:46,198
He got us a private room.
56
00:02:46,199 --> 00:02:47,915
I mean,
it's not totally private.
57
00:02:47,916 --> 00:02:49,984
It's where they keep
the foosball table,
58
00:02:49,985 --> 00:02:52,687
and actually,
there's another party there,
59
00:02:52,688 --> 00:02:54,873
but it's a small one.
60
00:02:54,874 --> 00:02:56,408
So I'm turning 35
61
00:02:56,409 --> 00:02:59,044
and we're celebrating that
at Cooper's?
62
00:02:59,045 --> 00:03:01,379
Last week I said, "What do you
want to do for your birthday?"
63
00:03:01,380 --> 00:03:03,715
You said,
"Don't do anything special. "
64
00:03:03,716 --> 00:03:05,783
Yeah, I meant,
don't do anything special
65
00:03:05,784 --> 00:03:08,253
like take me to France,
66
00:03:08,254 --> 00:03:12,524
not take me to where you have
a wing-eater's gold card.
67
00:03:12,525 --> 00:03:14,976
First of all, it's platinum,
and they only gave out four,
68
00:03:14,977 --> 00:03:16,210
okay?
69
00:03:17,546 --> 00:03:19,781
Look, Carrie,
Cooper's is just and idea, okay?
70
00:03:19,782 --> 00:03:21,166
We can go wherever you want.
71
00:03:21,167 --> 00:03:22,833
Like where?
72
00:03:22,834 --> 00:03:24,869
How about the hot new club
in the city
73
00:03:24,870 --> 00:03:26,538
you were talkin' about?
74
00:03:26,539 --> 00:03:28,906
Silk?
Yeah. Let's get silky.
75
00:03:32,978 --> 00:03:36,581
So you want to take me to
the hottest club in Manhattan?
76
00:03:36,582 --> 00:03:37,949
Yeah.
77
00:03:37,950 --> 00:03:41,286
Great. Now I have two days
to lose 10 pounds and 10 years.
78
00:03:41,287 --> 00:03:42,420
Unbelievable!
79
00:03:49,395 --> 00:03:52,564
So, uh, how old were you
when you went crazy?
80
00:03:52,565 --> 00:03:55,900
Son, 35 is a difficult birthday
for any woman.
81
00:03:57,169 --> 00:04:00,105
Maybe I better just give her
some time, let her cool off.
82
00:04:00,106 --> 00:04:02,173
No, no, no.
83
00:04:02,174 --> 00:04:03,975
Go to her, Douglas.
84
00:04:03,976 --> 00:04:05,977
Go to her.
85
00:04:18,541 --> 00:04:20,992
I used to have gorgeous hair.
86
00:04:20,993 --> 00:04:22,493
I could have sold it.
87
00:04:22,494 --> 00:04:25,380
Nobody would buy this.
Who'd buy this?
88
00:04:25,381 --> 00:04:28,300
I could hang a sign
at work.
89
00:04:28,301 --> 00:04:30,201
Look, you're obviously
going through
90
00:04:30,202 --> 00:04:32,020
some stuff right now, Car,
91
00:04:32,021 --> 00:04:34,773
and I just want you to know
I'm here for you.
92
00:04:34,774 --> 00:04:36,174
You're here for me?
You should be
93
00:04:36,175 --> 00:04:38,209
because this is all
your fault.
94
00:04:38,210 --> 00:04:39,610
My fault?
95
00:04:39,611 --> 00:04:41,696
Yeah, you stole my youth.
What?
96
00:04:41,697 --> 00:04:44,248
Right. I would still be young
and relatively attractive
97
00:04:44,249 --> 00:04:46,250
if I didn't have to pick up
after you all the time
98
00:04:46,251 --> 00:04:49,120
and wash your big, huge pants
and cook you dinner every night.
99
00:04:50,856 --> 00:04:52,991
We do order out a lot.
100
00:04:52,992 --> 00:04:55,327
I have to heat it up,
don't I?!
101
00:04:55,328 --> 00:04:58,913
Okay, are you okay, or do you
need me to go to the drugstore
102
00:04:58,914 --> 00:05:02,650
and buy you something
from the awkward aisle?
103
00:05:05,721 --> 00:05:09,090
No. It's just that
I'm turning 35
104
00:05:09,091 --> 00:05:10,592
and I feel like crap.
105
00:05:10,593 --> 00:05:12,810
Why are you getting
so down on yourself?
106
00:05:12,811 --> 00:05:14,345
I- I gotta tell ya.
107
00:05:14,346 --> 00:05:15,846
I think you look
more beautiful now
108
00:05:15,847 --> 00:05:17,482
than the day I even met you-
109
00:05:17,483 --> 00:05:19,834
Oh, shut up.
Okay.
110
00:05:19,835 --> 00:05:20,968
You know what it is, Doug?
111
00:05:20,969 --> 00:05:23,287
I'm not getting the feedback
that I used to.
112
00:05:23,288 --> 00:05:24,889
I mean, I don't remember
the last time
113
00:05:24,890 --> 00:05:27,324
I got groped on the subway.
114
00:05:27,325 --> 00:05:29,059
And those construction guys,
115
00:05:29,060 --> 00:05:31,929
I walk by them every day
and I get nothing from them.
116
00:05:31,930 --> 00:05:34,699
Nothing!
117
00:05:34,700 --> 00:05:36,835
I've peaked.
It's all downhill from here.
118
00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:38,420
Come on. You're being crazy now. No,
119
00:05:38,421 --> 00:05:40,054
it's different for men.
The older you get,
120
00:05:40,055 --> 00:05:41,539
the better-looking you get.
121
00:05:42,792 --> 00:05:43,891
You know what?
122
00:05:43,892 --> 00:05:45,493
You're the one
who should be mad at me.
123
00:05:45,494 --> 00:05:48,129
I mean, I'm not that hot
young thing you married.
124
00:05:48,130 --> 00:05:50,581
Oh, Carrie,
you're not 19 anymore.
125
00:05:50,582 --> 00:05:52,350
So I love you the way
you are right now.
126
00:05:52,351 --> 00:05:53,551
I love everything about you:
127
00:05:53,552 --> 00:05:55,053
the little lines
around your eyes.
128
00:05:55,054 --> 00:05:56,887
Oh, my God.
I got crow's feet?
129
00:06:00,192 --> 00:06:01,526
Sweet mama.
130
00:06:07,650 --> 00:06:09,734
Okay, Arthur,
I really have to get going.
131
00:06:09,735 --> 00:06:11,035
But I'm not finished.
132
00:06:11,036 --> 00:06:13,204
Arthur, you've been talking
for an hour straight.
133
00:06:13,205 --> 00:06:14,705
I think I'm pretty clear
on the fact
134
00:06:14,706 --> 00:06:18,159
that lard is the poor man's
butter.
135
00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:19,143
Oh, there is one more thing.
136
00:06:19,144 --> 00:06:20,912
This is very difficult
for me to ask,
137
00:06:20,913 --> 00:06:24,215
but I need
to borrow some money.
138
00:06:24,216 --> 00:06:28,002
Arthur, you haven't paid me back
the loan for the ostrich farm.
139
00:06:28,003 --> 00:06:30,472
By the way, uh,
what's going on with that?
140
00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:32,173
Nothing good.
141
00:06:32,174 --> 00:06:33,908
Now, I need to buy
142
00:06:33,909 --> 00:06:36,761
a birthday present for Carrie.
143
00:06:36,762 --> 00:06:37,895
Arthur, if you're broke...
144
00:06:37,896 --> 00:06:39,763
You know, why don't you
make her something?
145
00:06:39,764 --> 00:06:42,400
You guys do ceramics at
the senior center, don't you?
146
00:06:42,401 --> 00:06:45,019
Last week, I made an ashtray
of a woman lying on her back,
147
00:06:45,020 --> 00:06:47,021
but the location
of the cigarette nook
148
00:06:47,022 --> 00:06:48,556
proved controversial.
149
00:06:49,958 --> 00:06:52,193
Okay, no ashtray.
150
00:06:52,194 --> 00:06:54,228
Oh, I made my mom
a collage once
151
00:06:54,229 --> 00:06:55,696
and she just flipped.
Really?
152
00:06:55,697 --> 00:06:58,082
Yeah, yeah. You must have
old pictures of Carrie,
153
00:06:58,083 --> 00:06:59,250
like, when she was a little kid?
154
00:06:59,251 --> 00:07:00,852
You just arrange them
and frame it
155
00:07:00,853 --> 00:07:03,288
and it'll be better than any
expensive gift you can get her
156
00:07:03,289 --> 00:07:04,956
because it comes
from your heart.
157
00:07:04,957 --> 00:07:06,424
I love it.
Great.
158
00:07:06,425 --> 00:07:07,675
Now if you'll spot me a 20,
159
00:07:07,676 --> 00:07:09,176
I'd love to treat you
to lunch.
160
00:07:14,350 --> 00:07:16,784
Hey, you know, now that
those people are remodeling,
161
00:07:16,785 --> 00:07:19,454
you officially have the
crappiest house on the block.
162
00:07:20,689 --> 00:07:22,590
N- Hey, no, no, no.
Come on. We gotta go.
163
00:07:22,591 --> 00:07:23,891
It's not safe here.
164
00:07:25,728 --> 00:07:28,629
Oh, God,
I forgot my jacket.
165
00:07:29,881 --> 00:07:31,482
What's going on?
166
00:07:31,483 --> 00:07:34,435
It's just that Carrie's
turning 35 on Saturday,
167
00:07:34,436 --> 00:07:35,870
and she's freakin' out.
168
00:07:35,871 --> 00:07:37,638
Oh, yeah,
35's a bad one.
169
00:07:37,639 --> 00:07:39,506
Hey, but it'll toughen you up
for 40.
170
00:07:40,426 --> 00:07:42,176
Who's talking?
171
00:07:42,177 --> 00:07:44,912
Uh, it's just Deac
came by to pick me up.
172
00:07:44,913 --> 00:07:46,831
You want to come down
and say hello?
173
00:07:46,832 --> 00:07:49,366
Yeah, that's gonna happen.
174
00:07:49,367 --> 00:07:51,201
Okay, then, you-
You have a good one!
175
00:07:52,671 --> 00:07:55,172
I- I tried telling her she looks
beautiful and everything.
176
00:07:55,173 --> 00:07:56,774
She just bites
my head off, you know?
177
00:07:56,775 --> 00:07:59,427
It's like she needs to hear it
from someone else.
178
00:07:59,428 --> 00:08:01,145
You want me to tell her?
179
00:08:01,146 --> 00:08:03,865
Yeah, I'm not crazy
where that might lead.
180
00:08:11,022 --> 00:08:13,290
Deac, you know what? I'll, uh-
I'll meet you at work.
181
00:08:13,291 --> 00:08:15,393
I just gotta make a stop first.
182
00:08:23,935 --> 00:08:25,903
Hey, who wants a cold one?
183
00:08:27,205 --> 00:08:29,340
Yeah, thanks, buddy,
but, uh,
184
00:08:29,341 --> 00:08:31,209
we're not really supposed
to drink on the job.
185
00:08:31,210 --> 00:08:34,012
Hey, I'm not supposed
to put cheese in my cereal.
186
00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:36,164
Doug Heffernan.
Live a couple of doors down.
187
00:08:36,165 --> 00:08:38,900
I got kind of
a weird request for you.
188
00:08:38,901 --> 00:08:40,101
Yeah?
189
00:08:40,102 --> 00:08:42,553
Yeah. Uh, this is my wife,
Carrie.
190
00:08:42,554 --> 00:08:43,821
You guys recognize her?
191
00:08:43,822 --> 00:08:45,990
She walks by here every day
on her way to work.
192
00:08:45,991 --> 00:08:47,642
Yeah, I know her.
Remember?
193
00:08:47,643 --> 00:08:49,227
She flipped us off yesterday.
194
00:08:49,228 --> 00:08:50,645
That's her.
195
00:08:50,646 --> 00:08:52,513
Anyway, I was wondering
if you guys,
196
00:08:52,514 --> 00:08:53,981
you know,
when she walks by later,
197
00:08:53,982 --> 00:08:56,818
wouldn't mind yelling
some dirty stuff at her.
198
00:08:56,819 --> 00:08:58,570
What?
The thing is,
199
00:08:58,571 --> 00:09:00,755
she's turning 35 and she's
a little down on herself,
200
00:09:00,756 --> 00:09:02,590
so if you guys could
tell her that she's hot
201
00:09:02,591 --> 00:09:04,459
and yell out
all the nasty things
202
00:09:04,460 --> 00:09:07,745
you want to do to her and where,
she'd be floating on air.
203
00:09:07,746 --> 00:09:10,448
So you want us to
sexually harass your wife?
204
00:09:11,049 --> 00:09:13,418
Bingo.
You know,
205
00:09:13,419 --> 00:09:15,420
we're not supposed to do
that kind of stuff.
206
00:09:15,421 --> 00:09:17,087
You can't drink on the job.
207
00:09:17,088 --> 00:09:18,423
You can't harass women?
208
00:09:18,424 --> 00:09:20,808
How does anything get built
in this country?
209
00:09:20,809 --> 00:09:22,492
You know, he does
have a point there.
210
00:09:22,493 --> 00:09:24,962
Come on, it would really,
really help me out.
211
00:09:24,963 --> 00:09:26,497
So, what do you
want us to say?
212
00:09:26,498 --> 00:09:29,233
That's all you. You know,
just don't force it.
213
00:09:29,234 --> 00:09:30,768
Just throw it away.
214
00:09:30,769 --> 00:09:32,937
And by the way, you're gonna
have a lot to work with,
215
00:09:32,938 --> 00:09:35,206
'cause whether you like
the balcony or the basement,
216
00:09:35,207 --> 00:09:37,374
she is built to please.
217
00:09:37,375 --> 00:09:40,027
I guess I can say, uh, "Is that
a mirror in your pocket?
218
00:09:40,028 --> 00:09:42,280
'Cause I can see myself
in your pants. "
219
00:09:42,281 --> 00:09:43,513
Yes. I like that.
220
00:09:43,514 --> 00:09:45,649
Don't- Don't be afraid
to speak up.
221
00:09:45,650 --> 00:09:47,518
Yeah, so something like, uh,
222
00:09:47,519 --> 00:09:50,421
"Wait, mamamita,
shake those maracas!"
223
00:09:50,422 --> 00:09:52,373
Now we're cookin' with gas.
224
00:09:52,374 --> 00:09:54,008
What else you got?
I- I could say,
225
00:09:54,009 --> 00:09:56,911
"I-I love your hair,
and I want to cut it off,
226
00:09:56,912 --> 00:09:58,645
and I want to put it
in a box. "
227
00:10:02,885 --> 00:10:04,919
Hey, look what's comin' by!
228
00:10:04,920 --> 00:10:06,420
Oh, damn, she's hot.
229
00:10:06,421 --> 00:10:07,922
Hey, do fries
come with that shake?
230
00:10:07,923 --> 00:10:08,923
Whoo!
Whoo!
231
00:10:08,924 --> 00:10:12,026
Shake those maracas, mama!
232
00:10:14,396 --> 00:10:16,613
and then I want you to
233
00:10:16,614 --> 00:10:18,215
Oh, yeah!
234
00:10:24,206 --> 00:10:25,373
Hey, how was your day?
235
00:10:25,374 --> 00:10:28,009
Great. Hey, how about
steak for dinner, huh?
236
00:10:28,010 --> 00:10:29,310
Mmm.
And you know what?
237
00:10:29,311 --> 00:10:32,546
It has been a while since
I made my man some cupcakes.
238
00:10:38,537 --> 00:10:40,721
Look at all the places
you've been.
239
00:10:40,722 --> 00:10:42,674
You've had some life.
240
00:10:42,675 --> 00:10:44,092
It has been quite a ride.
241
00:10:44,093 --> 00:10:46,344
Oh, my God.
You were at Woodstock?
242
00:10:46,345 --> 00:10:50,080
Yes, I worked security.
243
00:10:50,081 --> 00:10:53,050
It was a magical three days
of kicking hippie ass.
244
00:10:54,403 --> 00:10:55,619
Wow.
245
00:10:55,620 --> 00:10:58,238
Turns out acid really
hampers a person's ability
246
00:10:58,239 --> 00:11:00,825
to defend themselves.
247
00:11:00,826 --> 00:11:02,877
Yeah. Tell me about it.
248
00:11:02,878 --> 00:11:06,080
Oh, look. Here's a really cute
picture of Carrie
249
00:11:06,081 --> 00:11:07,699
at one of her birthday parties.
250
00:11:07,700 --> 00:11:09,584
Oh, yes.
That's when she turned 6.
251
00:11:09,585 --> 00:11:11,018
Aw.
252
00:11:11,019 --> 00:11:13,705
I don't see you in any
of these pictures, though.
253
00:11:13,706 --> 00:11:14,839
I wasn't there.
254
00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:17,274
I, uh, boycotted that party
255
00:11:17,275 --> 00:11:19,209
for reasons
well known to her.
256
00:11:19,210 --> 00:11:22,279
Okay, well, I'm sure we can find
a cute one in here.
257
00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:25,899
Oh, look. This is Carrie
at high school graduation.
258
00:11:25,900 --> 00:11:27,368
Huh.
259
00:11:27,369 --> 00:11:29,437
Mm. Were you at that?
260
00:11:29,438 --> 00:11:30,688
No.
261
00:11:30,689 --> 00:11:33,357
I was at a high school
graduation that day,
262
00:11:33,358 --> 00:11:36,194
just not hers.
263
00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:37,945
Well, gosh, Arthur,
264
00:11:37,946 --> 00:11:40,982
I don't see you with Carrie
in any of these pictures.
265
00:11:40,983 --> 00:11:42,549
Well, I was a very busy man.
266
00:11:42,550 --> 00:11:45,787
I was on the road a lot.
I had obligations.
267
00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:46,837
I...
268
00:11:48,723 --> 00:11:51,125
I was a terrible father.
269
00:11:51,126 --> 00:11:52,460
Oh, no, Arthur.
Yes.
270
00:11:52,461 --> 00:11:54,227
Yes, those pictures
don't lie.
271
00:11:55,497 --> 00:11:58,833
I was too busy chasing
the almighty dollar.
272
00:11:58,834 --> 00:12:00,551
Well, it's better
than my dad
273
00:12:00,552 --> 00:12:01,986
who was too busy chasing
274
00:12:01,987 --> 00:12:04,155
the almighty tube of glue.
275
00:12:09,678 --> 00:12:12,163
Why couldn't I
have been at her party?
276
00:12:12,164 --> 00:12:13,730
Why?
277
00:12:14,466 --> 00:12:15,883
Excuse me, Holly.
278
00:12:17,686 --> 00:12:19,420
I need to lie down.
279
00:12:25,594 --> 00:12:27,728
I'm gonna call my dad.
280
00:12:32,084 --> 00:12:34,452
So you bring these guys
doughnuts every morning,
281
00:12:34,453 --> 00:12:35,787
they yell nasty stuff
at your wife,
282
00:12:35,788 --> 00:12:39,022
then she comes home happy
and makes you a pot roast?
283
00:12:40,074 --> 00:12:41,709
Yep. And the dirtier
the talk,
284
00:12:41,710 --> 00:12:43,795
the bigger the portions.
285
00:12:43,796 --> 00:12:47,098
I'm tellin' you, man,
you are playing with fire.
286
00:12:47,099 --> 00:12:48,850
Hey, boys!
287
00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:50,251
Hey.
What's up, Car?
288
00:12:50,252 --> 00:12:52,920
Who wants a Manwich?
289
00:12:56,224 --> 00:12:58,359
Um, sure.
290
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:01,145
Okay. Honey, I know what
I want to do for my birthday.
291
00:13:01,146 --> 00:13:03,281
Bring it.
So I want to go to Silk.
292
00:13:03,282 --> 00:13:04,264
We are so there.
293
00:13:07,102 --> 00:13:09,019
All right, but I wanna do
something before that.
294
00:13:09,020 --> 00:13:10,153
Oh, that is happening too.
295
00:13:12,407 --> 00:13:13,774
Stop it, sweetie,
stop it. Okay.
296
00:13:13,775 --> 00:13:15,843
You know the mountain bikes
we have in the garage
297
00:13:15,844 --> 00:13:17,328
that we bought
and never used?
298
00:13:17,329 --> 00:13:18,646
I don't know
about never used.
299
00:13:18,647 --> 00:13:21,315
I mean, technically, they are
keeping the fuse box shut.
300
00:13:23,151 --> 00:13:25,169
So you-
You want to go biking now?
301
00:13:25,170 --> 00:13:26,954
Yes. Remember that day
I was feeling so old?
302
00:13:26,955 --> 00:13:29,256
Well, I realized that's
all in your head.
303
00:13:29,257 --> 00:13:32,693
You gotta think young,
you gotta do young things, so...
304
00:13:34,196 --> 00:13:35,829
Red or blue?
305
00:13:38,100 --> 00:13:40,250
The, uh, red one'll
help the cars see you.
306
00:13:49,328 --> 00:13:52,363
Come on, Doug!
You can do it!
307
00:13:52,364 --> 00:13:55,116
It's too steep!
308
00:13:55,117 --> 00:13:57,285
You gotta pedal!
309
00:13:57,286 --> 00:13:59,420
I know how a bike works!
310
00:14:03,375 --> 00:14:05,960
You're in the wrong gear!
311
00:14:08,196 --> 00:14:09,597
Oh, God!
312
00:14:14,019 --> 00:14:15,002
Oh.
313
00:14:15,003 --> 00:14:16,803
Not good.
314
00:14:20,475 --> 00:14:22,443
Aagh!
315
00:14:31,552 --> 00:14:33,988
Hey, Arthur,
how's it going?
316
00:14:33,989 --> 00:14:35,389
Today's my daughter's birthday
317
00:14:35,390 --> 00:14:38,409
and my only gift is
a table full of neglect.
318
00:14:38,410 --> 00:14:39,593
Well, maybe not.
319
00:14:39,594 --> 00:14:41,461
Remember how I told you
I was dating that guy
320
00:14:41,462 --> 00:14:43,714
who works in the photo
department at Walgreen's?
321
00:14:43,715 --> 00:14:46,133
Nobody likes a braggart, Holly.
What's your point?
322
00:14:46,134 --> 00:14:48,102
Well, here's
that picture of Carrie
323
00:14:48,103 --> 00:14:49,603
blowing out
her birthday candles,
324
00:14:49,604 --> 00:14:53,057
except look who's got
his arm around her now.
325
00:14:53,058 --> 00:14:55,609
Oh, my God,
that's me.
326
00:14:55,610 --> 00:14:57,979
But how could that be?
I wasn't there.
327
00:14:57,980 --> 00:14:59,730
Well, no. Josh took
another picture of you
328
00:14:59,731 --> 00:15:02,499
and digitally superimposed it
onto Carrie's birthday picture.
329
00:15:02,500 --> 00:15:03,818
Anybody can do it.
330
00:15:03,819 --> 00:15:06,187
Any witch could do it.
331
00:15:06,188 --> 00:15:08,756
Okay, let's not get bogged down
with the details here.
332
00:15:08,757 --> 00:15:11,892
All I'm saying
is that any picture
333
00:15:11,893 --> 00:15:13,360
you want to put
yourself into,
334
00:15:13,361 --> 00:15:14,612
Josh can do it
for you.
335
00:15:14,613 --> 00:15:17,347
Normally, I don't dabble
in the black arts,
336
00:15:17,348 --> 00:15:20,884
but it sure would
get me out of a pickle.
337
00:15:36,385 --> 00:15:38,519
Red dress, the boy.
338
00:15:45,394 --> 00:15:47,595
I'm gonna throw this out
one more time.
339
00:15:47,596 --> 00:15:49,764
There's a Wendy's
two blocks away
340
00:15:49,765 --> 00:15:51,649
and it's got a playground.
341
00:15:51,650 --> 00:15:53,000
Doug, come on.
We're gonna get in.
342
00:15:53,001 --> 00:15:54,001
I can feel it.
343
00:15:54,002 --> 00:15:55,569
Come on, you used to work
at a club.
344
00:15:55,570 --> 00:15:58,322
Why don't you go talk to
the guy, bouncer to bouncer?
345
00:15:58,323 --> 00:15:59,940
I guess I could do that.
All right, go, go.
346
00:15:59,941 --> 00:16:01,341
Yeah.
Go, baby, go, go, go.
347
00:16:01,342 --> 00:16:02,943
Excuse me. Excuse me.
I'm on the, uh-
348
00:16:02,944 --> 00:16:05,912
I'm on the list. Excuse me.
I'm on the list up here.
349
00:16:05,913 --> 00:16:08,715
I'm on the list. Sorry. He's got
a special list we gotta do.
350
00:16:10,085 --> 00:16:11,952
What's up?
351
00:16:13,354 --> 00:16:16,423
I used to bounce too.
Neon, '91 to '93.
352
00:16:16,424 --> 00:16:18,492
It's Starbucks now.
Like- Like-
353
00:16:18,493 --> 00:16:20,927
Like we need more of those.
You know what I'm saying?
354
00:16:20,928 --> 00:16:22,463
Every corner.
That's a nice set-
355
00:16:22,964 --> 00:16:25,433
Don't touch.
356
00:16:25,434 --> 00:16:27,101
Oh, mama.
357
00:16:27,102 --> 00:16:28,769
Sorry. Sorry.
358
00:16:28,770 --> 00:16:30,086
Guy lost the list.
359
00:16:30,087 --> 00:16:31,455
Ass.
360
00:16:31,456 --> 00:16:33,441
What an ass.
361
00:16:33,442 --> 00:16:34,491
Excuse me.
They lost the li-
362
00:16:34,492 --> 00:16:36,359
I laid some groundwork
is what I did. Good.
363
00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:38,529
He's coming back.
He's coming back. Yeah.
364
00:16:38,530 --> 00:16:40,197
Uh, you two.
365
00:16:40,198 --> 00:16:41,982
You and you.
366
00:16:41,983 --> 00:16:43,384
Oh, thank you.
All right.
367
00:16:43,385 --> 00:16:45,002
Oh, the thing is
it's my birthday
368
00:16:45,003 --> 00:16:47,755
and I don't really want to go in
without my husband, so...
369
00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:49,040
You want to go in or out?
370
00:16:49,041 --> 00:16:50,875
All right, I'm gonna
go get us a table.
371
00:16:50,876 --> 00:16:52,326
I'll meet you
in there, honey.
372
00:16:54,262 --> 00:16:56,697
Hi, is there any possible way
that I could-
373
00:16:58,032 --> 00:16:59,533
Don't touch.
374
00:17:02,721 --> 00:17:03,988
We're both Green Berets.
375
00:17:03,989 --> 00:17:06,857
We're just constantly
testing each other.
376
00:17:14,332 --> 00:17:17,067
Come on, baby.
Time to get up.
377
00:17:18,353 --> 00:17:20,788
We only went to bed
three hours ago. What are you-
378
00:17:20,789 --> 00:17:23,307
Plenty of time to sleep
when we get old. Come on.
379
00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:27,528
Oh, God, they got that
jackhammer working again, huh?
380
00:17:28,713 --> 00:17:30,998
Shut it off!
381
00:17:30,999 --> 00:17:32,833
Stop it.
382
00:17:34,469 --> 00:17:36,736
Morning, boys.
383
00:17:38,206 --> 00:17:40,274
Hey, watch out what
you're doin' with that hose.
384
00:17:40,275 --> 00:17:41,875
This is a family neighborhood.
385
00:17:42,910 --> 00:17:44,345
Okay, baby.
386
00:17:46,331 --> 00:17:48,399
And as for you,
let's get goin'.
387
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:50,234
We have places to be.
388
00:17:50,235 --> 00:17:51,485
What? Where?
389
00:17:51,486 --> 00:17:54,772
I made a reservation for brunch
at this new place in SoHo.
390
00:17:54,773 --> 00:17:56,490
Oh. All right.
391
00:17:56,491 --> 00:17:58,109
And we're gonna
ride our bikes there.
392
00:17:58,110 --> 00:17:58,942
What?
393
00:17:58,943 --> 00:18:00,828
No, no. No more biking.
394
00:18:00,829 --> 00:18:02,780
Why?
We had fun yesterday.
395
00:18:02,781 --> 00:18:04,831
Carrie,
my seat was in me!
396
00:18:08,970 --> 00:18:10,604
Doug,
397
00:18:10,605 --> 00:18:12,906
I am serious
about this.
398
00:18:12,907 --> 00:18:15,709
I don't want to spend Saturday
nights on the couch anymore.
399
00:18:15,710 --> 00:18:17,277
I want to live life,
400
00:18:17,278 --> 00:18:19,797
but you gotta keep up
with me, all right?
401
00:18:21,949 --> 00:18:23,083
So, what-
402
00:18:23,084 --> 00:18:24,718
What do you want me to do?
403
00:18:24,719 --> 00:18:27,588
Okay, well, I want you to be
more open to things
404
00:18:27,589 --> 00:18:30,257
like taking our bikes
to brunch
405
00:18:30,258 --> 00:18:32,626
and maybe going
to an art gallery.
406
00:18:32,627 --> 00:18:34,728
And I think
we should revisit
407
00:18:34,729 --> 00:18:37,497
the whole Weight Watchers thing.
408
00:18:39,484 --> 00:18:41,202
Okay.
409
00:18:41,203 --> 00:18:43,287
Change of plans.
410
00:18:45,473 --> 00:18:48,025
Whoo-hoo! Look what's comin'!
411
00:18:48,026 --> 00:18:49,393
Yo, baby,
you look hot.
412
00:18:49,394 --> 00:18:50,927
Uh, but not that hot.
413
00:18:50,928 --> 00:18:53,263
Very attractive
for a woman your age.
414
00:18:53,264 --> 00:18:55,699
Oh, yeah, I'd like to see you
stay home and not go out.
415
00:18:55,700 --> 00:18:57,201
Whoo!
416
00:19:00,671 --> 00:19:02,139
Hey, check it out.
417
00:19:02,140 --> 00:19:04,674
Step lightly, chunky.
We fixed that sidewalk.
418
00:19:04,675 --> 00:19:06,643
Yeah, the buffet called.
You win.
419
00:19:06,644 --> 00:19:08,145
You have a mirror
in your pocket?
420
00:19:08,146 --> 00:19:10,481
'Cause you are really fat.
421
00:19:10,482 --> 00:19:12,198
What the hell?
422
00:19:14,302 --> 00:19:16,437
Get in.
423
00:19:17,822 --> 00:19:19,990
She brought us cupcakes.
424
00:19:26,948 --> 00:19:28,882
Sorry my gift was
a little late, darling,
425
00:19:28,883 --> 00:19:30,216
but picking and choosing
426
00:19:30,217 --> 00:19:32,820
from 35 years
of wonderful memories
427
00:19:32,821 --> 00:19:34,521
is no easy chore.
428
00:19:34,522 --> 00:19:37,258
Oh, Dad,
this is so sweet.
429
00:19:37,259 --> 00:19:40,844
See? There we are together
at your sixth birthday party.
430
00:19:40,845 --> 00:19:42,546
Oh, yeah.
431
00:19:42,547 --> 00:19:43,496
Yes.
432
00:19:43,497 --> 00:19:46,300
We had some marvelous moments.
433
00:19:46,301 --> 00:19:49,436
Yeah, it's just I don't remember
you and me riding an elephant.
434
00:19:50,371 --> 00:19:53,641
Or going to the Oscars.
435
00:19:53,642 --> 00:19:56,910
That's why we take pictures
436
00:19:58,079 --> 00:19:59,730
Thank you, Daddy.
437
00:19:59,731 --> 00:20:00,614
Mm-hm.
438
00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:12,042
What?
Hey. Uh,
439
00:20:12,043 --> 00:20:15,045
I got a delivery
for a Leonard Montclair.
440
00:20:15,046 --> 00:20:17,498
That's my roommate.
I'll take it.
441
00:20:17,499 --> 00:20:20,233
Hey, you're that bouncer
from the club.
442
00:20:20,234 --> 00:20:22,803
Eh. The one who wouldn't
let me in.
443
00:20:25,423 --> 00:20:27,541
Yeah.
444
00:20:27,542 --> 00:20:28,759
Just give me the package.
445
00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:30,110
No, that's all right.
Uh,
446
00:20:30,111 --> 00:20:31,511
you know, I'm sorry.
447
00:20:31,512 --> 00:20:32,746
See, the problem is
448
00:20:32,747 --> 00:20:34,982
I need the addressee
to sign for it, okay?
449
00:20:34,983 --> 00:20:36,750
So I'm gonna have
to throw you a:
450
00:20:36,751 --> 00:20:38,686
"Don't touch. "
451
00:20:38,687 --> 00:20:40,220
Yeah.
452
00:20:40,221 --> 00:20:41,488
Oh, yeah.
No, no.
453
00:20:41,489 --> 00:20:44,358
Don't touch.
32174
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