All language subtitles for Schooled S01E11 Glascott Mascot 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP5 1 H 264-NTb_track3_[eng]

LAINEY:
Back in the '90s, sports
mascots were all the rage.

Fans went nuts for
the sausage races in Milwaukee

and the legendary
Phillie Phanatic.

But the traditional mascot
of William Penn

didn't quite capture
that same fire.

Ow!

(LAUGHTER)

MELLOR:
All right, enough!

There's nothing funny about
a pass that far off target.

The Quaker's lame!
I quit!

Quaker, wait!

You can't quit, Quaker.
We have a game tonight.

We need
your Quaker energy.

My name is Jessica,
and I don't care!
I'm done!

I get it, okay?

A goofy-headed pacifist
with an odd toothy smile

doesn't exactly inspire a team
to crush the enemy,

but he's been our mascot
for over 100 years.

(SIGHS)

**

What if
I could help you?

What if the Quaker
finally had...

Power?

I think
I'd like it a lot.

**

What the hell is this?

You gave the Quaker
a weapon?

I gave the Quaker
confidence.

Rick, this is not
the kind of image

we want associated
with our school.

You know, this is why
I think we need

to come up
with a new mascot.

No way!
Coach, it's the '90s.

Schools, colleges,
even pro sport teams

are changing their mascots
to become more kind
and inclusive.

But that is the opposite
of what a mascot should be!

It needs to invoke fear
and aggressive behavior!

Then I will personally
oversee the creation

of this new mascot
all by myself.

Whoa, wait.
Sports is my department.

Coaching sports
is your department.

Everything else
in this school,
that's all me.

How about we compromise
by giving the Quaker
a T-shirt cannon?

I know a great cannon guy.
He spots me at the gym.

No cannon,
no creepy Quaker.

And also, return this
to the harvest display.

Thanks, pal.

Oh, damn!
That's real!

* One of these days,
you're gonna get outta here

* Live your life
and finally be free

* Go where you wanna go,
do what you wanna do

* Someday, you will say
"Those were the days" *

LAINEY: It was April 10th,
1990-something,

and the final bell
had just rung.

The end of work, one of
the highlights of my day.

Hey, where you headed?
Home.

I have
standing appointments

with my girlfriends
Ricki Lake and Sally Jessy.

Oh, come on.
Stick around.

This is prime time

to make meaningful connection
with the students.

You realize
those connections

are only meaningful
for you, right?

Hey, CB.
You got a sec?

Uh, watch and learn.
Of course, Aaron,
What's up, dude?

I heard the school
used to have a radio station.

I was thinking it'd be cool
to start it back up again.

Maybe you could be
the club advisor.

Consider yourself advised.

Yes!
(CHUCKLING) Okay.

Wow. A week ago,
I encouraged Aaron

to get more involved,
and boom.

The kid's a Slater-head.
That's why he wants
to do radio.

Like A.C. Slater
from Saved by the Bell?

What?
Are you not down
with the Bell? Sad.

I'm talking about
Christian Slater.

Aaron literally
had him on his shirt.

The kid clearly watched
Pump Up the Volume

and now wants
a piece of the cool.

Why only a piece
when he can have

the whole cool package
right here?

Come with me.

Let's see. Who do we have
out there tonight, huh?

The, uh, usual band
of teenage malcontents?

See? Christian Slater plays
a badass radio DJ

who turns his whole school
upside down.

Now you see why Aaron Rubin
wants to be this guy.

I want to be this guy.
He's such a badass.

Agree on all points.
This movie's awesome.

I've seen it like 60 times,

and I remember
at least five of them.

We're gonna
give these kids

the best student
radio station ever!

Right on.
Let's do this.

He means "we"
as in "me," dude.

Pretty sure "he" meant "we"
as in "three."

I meant "we"
as in "me and she."

Oh, come on!

That radio equipment
is here 'cause of me.

Back when
I roamed these halls,
I had a radio show

the whole school
was obsessed with.

Tell him, Lainey.

I have no memory of this.

Rush Hour?

30 minutes
of nonstop Rush songs!

Why not 60 minutes?

I mean, it would
make more sense
with Rush Hour.

Wow.
Never thought of that.

I think
we're good here, pal.

If you need me,
you know where to find me.

LAINEY: So, just like that,
the school radio station
was brought back to life.

Welcome to
our radio show.

Today's topic...
Uh, fish sticks.

Becky,
what did you think?

They were all right.

Yeah, uh,
they were all right.

Oh, man.

This is so
Pump Up the Volume,
you know?

Yeah, it's just like
the moment after the credits,

when the screen
was black.

I know.
This isn't Slater at all.

LAINEY: Guys, come on.

This is an opportunity
to express how you
really feel.

Don't hold back.
You're 15.

Life sucks
'cause you're oily
and have braces.

You should be angry.

I am angry!

Those fish sticks
were not all right.

Yeah, I prefer
the nuggets.

Okay. Good start.

Anything non-nugget-
or fish-stick-related
that pisses you off?

Well, I have three tests
on Friday,

and that, like, sucks.

Don't tell me.
Tell them.

(SWITCH CLICKS)

I have three tests
on Friday,

and that, like, sucks.

No, wait.
It's bull poop.

This is bull crap!

Yeah!
Poop.

LAINEY: As I was getting
the kids fired up,

Glascott was psyched
to show his choice

for his new symbol
of the school.

Okay,
this better be good.

I left a cold protein shake
on my desk.

GLASCOTT: This will be
well worth your time.

I present to you
the new and improved mascot
of William Penn,

powerful
and yet non-offensive.

Lifting our school
to new heights,

I give you...

The Wind!

You got to be
kidding me.

Now blow
a gust of wind.

JESSICA: Did I do it right?
Is it out?

Oh, yeah. And at pep rallies,
she'll be on roller skates!

You really want to die
on this hill, John?

The principal
has made up his mind.

End of discussion.

Look, I got a way
we can fix all this.

You make me
Athletics Principal,

and I'll make sure
we hold on to our old mascot.

Athletics Principal?

(CHUCKLES)
That's your idea?

Yeah. You know,
I'd be in charge

of everything under
the athletics umbrella,

like sports, and, uh,

pep rallies, mascotting,
and jock strap-ery.

And you'd be in charge
of everything else.

You can't section off my job
into a bunch of principals.

What's next?
Science Principal?

Art Principal?

Rick, I'm the one and only
principal around here,

and we're going
with the Wind.

Is anybody out there?

**

We have a problem,
as, apparently,

your deejays like
to do daily critiques
of my wardrobe.

Today they said
my outfit looked
like a homeless cowgirl.

Liz, you can't take it
personally.

Yeah, I think
it's a cute...vest.

I'll have you know that
this is a sleeveless poncho

that was hand-stitched
by a Navajo businesswoman
just outside of Taos.

I mean, look at
this intricate handcrafting...

It has served its purpose
and will return to the earth
from whence it came.

Liz, I'm sorry
about the kids,

but they're just
expressing themselves.

Well, I don't appreciate
being publicly critiqued
by my students.

And the other teachers
agree.

But they're learning to rebel
and speak their minds.

Yeah, Liz, let's stop
being so insecure

and encourage
their voices for once.

That's right.
Instead of shutting them down,
let's hear more.

AARON: Sometimes,
it feels like the teachers
just aren't on our side.

BECKY: Totally.
Except for Lainey and CB.

They're still
looking out for us.

AARON: Which is amazing,
'cause lately it seems
that they spend

most of their time
looking at each other.

BECKY: So true. It's like,
get a room already!

Well, this has taken
an unexpected turn.

BECKY: This next song
is dedicated to them.

This is Boyz II Men,
I'll Make Love to...

(CLICK)
(INHALES SHARPLY)
Now, that's funny.

(FORCED LAUGHTER)

Yeah.
Oh, my gosh.

That's funny
to me, too.
Yeah. Super funny.

I'll let you two
have the room.

Okay.
You don't
have to do that.

CB: No. All right,
take care.

We gotta
shut those punks down.

Oh, yeah.

**

John.
(KNOCKS ON DESK)

The Wind is
the most idiotic mascot

to represent
our school,

and now I have the board
breathing down my neck,

so you fix this!

Just give it a chance.

Trust me,
I'm making the right call.

Mascots aren't
your call anymore.

What?

I am taking athletics
off your plate,

and I'm giving it
to Mellor.

Oh, my God.
He got to you.

No one got to me.
I-I came up with this
on my own.

You tell him
I'm the Athletics Principal?

Damn it, Rick.
I told you to hide
by the vending machines.

I can't believe you're gonna
listen to his insane idea.

There is no such thing
as Athletics Principal.

And how would
that work, anyhow?

Not my job
to figure out the details.

It's my job to make
the sweeping change

and to let you two
take it from there.
Good luck.

We're gonna crush this thing
together, huh?

I don't wanna
crush this together.

Well, geez, I'm just trying
to get off on the right foot
with my fellow principal.

You just stick to athletics.
I do everything else.

Ah, do your thing.
You won't even know I'm here.

Ha!

All right, everyone,
let's begin.

Uh, just a few
announcements today...

Yes!
Let's get started.

It's meeting time,
which for us is game time.

We can do this, team!

Rick,
what are you doing?

I'm co-leading
the meeting.

Everyone, I have been
formally promoted

to this school's
new Athletics Principal.

Sure. Well, this is
a staff meeting,
and I'm running it.

The non-athletics part.

All right,
let's just push through.
All right.

Item one, faculty parking lot.
Item one, faculty party logs.

GLASCOTT: We'll be
repaving the faculty...

We'll be repasting
the faculty...

...parking lot this Tuesday...
...paper long this Tuesday...

...so teachers
will be directed...

...so teachers'll
be directing...

...to park in the
visitors' lot.
...the visitor paper logs.

Make sure that you get
your green passes...

Maple sugar you pick up
your great packets.

...or your car
will be ticketed.

Otherwise,
you will be tickled.

And yes, the overflow...
And yes,
of course, overlord...

...will be sent to
the students' parking lot...
...partying will be in the...

...right, in the Studebaker.
So try to get here early.

You know, Rick, why don't
I do my announcements
and then you do yours?

You got it,
Co-Prince.

(GROANS)

There's...

Nothing written
on these.

Mmm.
Meeting adjourned!

**

LAINEY: Thanks
to the Radio Club,

the whole school
was gossiping about CB and me.
It was time to rein them in.

Gotta say,
been a great first week
for the radio station.

Yes!
LAINEY: You guys are
telling it like it is

and making a difference.

We could not be
more proud.

But others disagree.

Yeah, teachers are pissed.
They want to shut you down.

What?

But, as the cool ones
who started
this whole thing,

we've come up with a solution
that works for everyone.

Lainey?

"Pre-Approved Ways
To Rebel"?

This list is so rad,
only the baddest
boys and girls

dare touch
controversial stuff like this.

Yeah, like
classroom temperature.

Taco Tuesday.
Pencil sharpeners.

Rain.
Rain?

Rain.
Ew. I hate rain.

So controversial.

This is so lame.

Yesterday
we were talking about

things that really
meant something to us.

Yeah, if we can't talk
about what we want,
what's the point?

I'd rather
not do it at all.

Ooh, you know what?
This is good.
I like your defiance.

Me too.
Let's shut it down.

Wait. Wait, what?

You're telling them
if you can't run your station

the way you want,
then you won't do it at all.

That is badass.

Your silence will be
louder than your words.

That's not what I said.

Shhah! Silence.

CB and I had shut down
the radio station

and the gossip about us
for good.

Or so we had thought.

Hey.
What's going on?

The radio station,
it's back!

(HIGH-PITCHED)
You're listening to
the Mad Mouth of William Penn,

the voice of the voiceless
and the scourge
of our oppressors!

The transmitter's gone.

Yeah, that means
it's real pirate radio.

(OVER SPEAKERS) Don't worry,
kiddies. No one will ever
shut me down.

Not even the teacher
on the DL...

Mr. and Mrs. Traitor!

(LAUGHS EVILLY)

Maybe he's talking
about someone else?

CB and Lainey,
just to be clear.

Nope.
We have to stop
being seen together.

**

You stay.

LAINEY: Our plan to silence
the kids had backfired,

while the power struggle
between John and Rick
was worse than ever.

You know,
come to think of it,

make it
an even 100 kickballs.

What the hell?
Hello?

They hung up.

Okay, you need to stop
this whole
Athletics Principal nonsense.

John, if this partnership
is gonna work...

This is not
a partnership!

I'm the principal
of this school.

My God, does it bother you
that much that I'm in charge?

No! Maybe.

Only when you do dumb stuff,
which is a lot!

There it is.
You want to be
in charge.

That's what
this is all about.

No!
Please.

Everyone knows
you wanted this job,

and you got angry
and disappointed

and threw a fit
when you didn't get it.

I did not!

I was there.

Ball said to me,
"You got the job,"

and then you screamed,
"I'm angry and disappointed!"

You want
to see me fail.

But I won't.

The Wind stays!

So does the Quaker.

You want to go to the mat
on this? 'Cause I will, pal.

So will I.
We're wrestling
for real, right?

No! Get out!

I'm leaving.

**

You all know
why you're here.

Someone in this room
is Mad Mouth.

Anybody want to step up
and admit it?

It's not anyone here.

But whoever it is,
they speak for all of us.

Yeah, I wouldn't turn them in
if I knew who it was.

I have total respect
for that.

Same. Word.

But now the trial begins.

Each of you will read
from one of Mad Mouth's
hate-filled screeds

so we can figure out
who's been talking about us.

Well... Not us.

And yes, us, but...
The whole school in general.

This isn't
gonna help you.

Mad Mouth
disguises his voice.

(SCOFFS)
I'm a trained musician.

I have an ear
for these things.

Mad Mouth
will be exposed.

"The administration
is run by cowards and pigs

"who only care
about money."

"CB and Lainey
are so annoying.

"Clearly,
they're hot for each other.
Just get busy already!"

Um, CB,
which screed is this?

(WHISPERING)
I don't know.

I had
Ms. Jensen's typing class
transcribe it for me.

"The bickering,
the teasing,

"the long doe-eyed stares.

"And that's just CB."

I really should've
checked this first.

"The bump-and-grind."

"Get your freak on."

"Knockin' boots."

"Human pretzel,
double-dipped."

Oh, come on! Doesn't this guy
talk about anything else?

Whoever it is,
just admit it.

It's not us.
Listen, he's on right now.

MAD MOUTH:
As I speak, the lovebirds
are looking for me,

trying to shut me down.

Oh, and we will.
But they won't.

You can't hide
from us forever.

Because I can hide forever!

Damn. He's annoying,
but good.

Can we go now?

Oh. Sure.

Sorry to falsely
accuse you.
Yeah.

Don't tell your parents
about this.

Have a great day.
It was our fault.

Tommy, tie your shoe.

This is a nightmare.
We'll never figure out
who Mad Mouth is.

Next up, some tunes from
the world's greatest band...

Rush!

Um, or any band.
Doesn't have to be Rush.

But they are the greatest.
Damn it!

Son of a bitch.
Such a dummy.

**

Don't you worry,
loyal listeners.

Are you kidding me
right now?

Oh, no! It's The Man.
Atkins signing off.

I mean... Mad Mouth.

What the hell
are you doing?

I told you
radio was my jam.

I just
liked feeling alive again.

By telling everyone
we have a thing going on?

But you do
have a thing going on.

But we don't
have a thing going on!

Then why are you two
bantering all the time

and busting
each other's balls?

'Cause that's
what friends do!
Yeah.

I mean, look at him,
with his dumb hair
and his dumb ties,

and, I mean,
who wears pants like that?
Okay, well...

Sometimes, there are
so many pleats,

I don't even understand
how there can be so many.

Point is, we need
to tell Glascott about this.

But I'll be fired.

Well, frankly,
you should be,

for turning on us
the way you did.

At least I didn't
turn on the kids!

What?
We didn't turn on them.

All we did
was shut them down

when we didn't like
what they were saying.
Oh.

Look, part of my job
is I get to be
a fly on the wall,

and I hear their problems.

They don't think anybody cares
what they have to say,

and all you did
was prove it was true.

Well, your job
isn't to speak for them.

You know, I work
just as hard as you do.

And, frankly, I actually
respect these kids.

**

Serious Johnny Atkins
makes me sad.

LAINEY: Glascott
was determined
to prove Mellor wrong

and premiere his new mascot.

Unfortunately,
not everyone was on board.

Jessica?

The pep rally's
about to start.

Why aren't you in the Wind?

Um, because
it's ridiculous.

I'm having
a whole political battle

with the so-called
Athletics Principal,

and you would be
doing me a solid
if you put this on.

Not on my watch,
Quaker Girl.

Your Athletics Principal
is here to save you.

Now put this on
and get out there

and show them how a Quaker
slays the enemy.

No. Put on my costume

and show them
how the Wind can lift
our school

to new heights
of sportsmanship and unity!

Quakers never
stop fighting!

The Wind
never stops blowing!

I'm not doing either!

Hope you're happy, John.
Now we have no mascot at all.

Or do we?

No.

As Athletics Principal,

I demand
you don't go out in that!

And as the real,
actual principal,

who will do anything
for his school,

I dare you to stop me.

GLASCOTT: (ON PA)
Blowing in from the east,
powerful and strong,

I give you William Penn's
new and improved mascot.

Let's hear it for...
The Wind!

LAINEY: And with that,
Glascott presented

his new symbol of William Penn
to the students.

They were confused.

GLASCOTT: How come
they're not clapping?

That's okay, John.
You just gotta
kick it up a notch...

Show 'em what The Wind
can really do.

**

(LAUGHTER)
LAINEY: It wasn't going well.

And it only got worse.

GLASCOTT: Quaker?

Coach Rick!

STUDENTS: Ohh!

No weapons!

LAINEY: Turns out
the two principals

were not going down
without a fight.

(CHEERING)

Literally.

**

LAINEY: It had been
a day since
the battle of the mascots,

but the war over who
was the true principal
was still raging.

Okay, moving on.

The sports banquet will be
bigger and more delicious
than ever this year...

Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Rick.

Did you call
a faculty meeting
without me?

Did I call upon my authority
as Athletics Principal?

Indeed I did.

Well, all announcements
go through me,

the Principal Principal,

which means
I get to say them.

Okay, guys, guys,
it really doesn't matter
who...

All right, well, listen.
We will be holding
practices...

Okay, uh, we will be
holding practices...

...for boys soccer
from 8:00 to 10:00...

...at the boys soccer
from 8:00 to 10:00...

...which means
that girls softball...

...which would mean
that the girls soccer...

...is now going to take place
on the northwest...
...is not going to be...

...baseball field.
...taking place on that
northwest baseball field.

Gentlemen, please!

What the (BLEEP)
was that?

See? Liz agrees!

There's only room for
one principal at this school,

so you guys need to make up
your minds right now.

Show of hands!
Hey! Focus up, okay?

You two,
figure this out

and leave us
the heck out of it!

(SIGHS)

Well, this one
may be on me.

Of course it is.
You want my job.

Yeah, I do.

I did.

At least...
I wanted to be asked,

to be taken seriously
for once.

Rick, I take you seriously.
I always have.

Well, then,
why'd you go rogue

and make up your own mascot
without me?

'Cause I wanted
to be taken seriously.

The truth is,

if there's anyone
not respected in their job,
it's me.

Wow.

Guess we both wanted
the same thing.

Only difference is,
I'm such a disappointment,

part of my job
was given to you.

(MATCHBOX TWENTY'S PUSH
PLAYS)

John, you're the only one
who would get up

in front of all those people
dressed as the stupid wind.

Now, if that doesn't
make you the heart
and soul of this school,

then I don't know
what does.

I think it's time
for you to be

the one and only principal
again.

Thanks, man.

LAINEY: Coach and Glascott
had ended their mascot feud
once and for all,

but as for CB and I, we still
had some work to finish.

Hey, Johnny.
What are you doing?

What does it look
like I'm doing?

I'm done here.

When you guys rat me out and
they hear that I'm Mad Mouth,

there's no way
they'll keep me
at this school.

Johnny, we didn't tell anybody
that you're Mad Mouth.

You didn't tell Ball
about me?

Oh, we told Ball
about you.

We told him you should be
in charge of the radio club.

What?
Sure.

We told him
if he did that,

the kids wouldn't need
a Mad Mouth...

Because they'd have
somebody guiding them
who really gets it.

(BOX THUDS)

Oh, man.

I can't believe you guys
would do this for me.

But just so you know,
I'm not giving up
my regular job.

(LAUGHS)

* I wanna push you around

* Well, I will, well, I will

You ready to knock 'em dead
out there, Jessica?

All right,
let's do this.

I can't tell you
how impressed I am

that you're still willing
to go out there
in that costume

for this school.

Well, what can I say?
Anything for William Penn.

But this is probably
the last time.

LAINEY: Our school years
are often filled

with the most real, emotional
experiences of our lives,

for both students
and teachers.

And in tough times,

where it can feel like we're
working against each other,

we need to open ourselves up

and understand what
we're really going through.

I've known
that ponytailed man
a long time.

I've never seen him
so happy.

Yeah. Well,
we make a great team.

Not really.

We actually
caused a ton of damage

and had to have the school
custodian set us straight.

Well, at least we stopped
the flirting talk about us
from being a thing.

I mean,
not a thing between us.

Just, a thing.

Believe me,
I want nothing to do
with any of that stuff, so...

Right. Me neither.

The thing is, I...

I'm kind of
hung up on someone,

and I didn't realize how hard
it would be working here.

You know.

Just...

A lot of memories.

Well, if you need someone
to talk to, I'm here.

As a friend.

Thanks, CB.

Yeah.

**

LAINEY: My memories
were of a boyfriend
I had back in the '80s.

It was hard
to forget our time.

* I wanna push you around

* Well, I will, well, I will

* I wanna push you down

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
* Well, I will, well, I will

* I wanna push you around

Hi, I'm Sean Marquette,
and I'm sitting here

with the real
Johnny Atkins.

I want to ask about
your lifelong commitment
to the ponytail.

(LAUGHS)

I started growing it
in high school.

Mom wasn't
real happy about it.

If I pulled it
real tight

and I looked her
straight in the face,

it looked like
I had short hair.

"Morning, Mom.
Don't look at my profile."

That's exactly right.
(LAUGHING)
That's great.

I hear you went dressed as
Johnny Atkins for Halloween.

Yeah, I decided to dress up
as you dressed up as me.

MARQUETTE: Turns out,
really easy outfit.

You just need a Rush shirt
and some glasses like this.

What was it like growing up in
a small town, like Jenkintown?

It was great
because you knew everybody,

and it was horrible
because everybody knew you.

(LAUGHS)

Like having
a town full of parents.

Did you really play
the saxophone in high school?

I played saxophone through
high school, through college.

Did you get chicks
with the saxophone?

No.
(LAUGHS)