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1
00:00:02,103 --> 00:00:03,583
Okay, I Don'’t know
what happened here
2
00:00:03,620 --> 00:00:05,931
but 100 bucks says
I get blamed for it.
3
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:07,689
Sabrina?
4
00:00:07,758 --> 00:00:10,827
Before I go, I just
wanted to say...
5
00:00:10,896 --> 00:00:12,275
Salem!
6
00:00:12,344 --> 00:00:14,827
Where is my bookie
when I need him?
7
00:00:17,448 --> 00:00:19,068
Wait a minute.
8
00:00:19,137 --> 00:00:22,655
This looks like
Sabrina'’s mouth.
9
00:00:22,724 --> 00:00:24,758
These are her eyes.
10
00:00:24,827 --> 00:00:26,206
And this looks like her...
11
00:00:26,275 --> 00:00:27,379
Sorry, Sabrina.
12
00:00:27,448 --> 00:00:30,172
Well, Don'’t just
stand there, lug nut.
13
00:00:30,241 --> 00:00:31,620
Sweep her up.
14
00:00:34,758 --> 00:00:35,689
Whoa.
15
00:00:35,758 --> 00:00:37,827
Sabrina, are you okay?
16
00:00:37,896 --> 00:00:39,448
Yeah, i'’m fine.
17
00:00:39,517 --> 00:00:41,344
Except that you were
standing on my tongue.
18
00:00:41,413 --> 00:00:42,758
How did I get put back together?
19
00:00:42,827 --> 00:00:43,827
Girl: I did it.
20
00:00:43,862 --> 00:00:45,586
Aunt Zelda?
21
00:00:45,655 --> 00:00:48,172
You gave up your
adult years for me?
22
00:00:48,241 --> 00:00:50,000
That is so generous.
23
00:00:50,068 --> 00:00:52,310
And a very crafty way
to get rid of wrinkles.
24
00:00:52,379 --> 00:00:54,482
I know it might
be a little strange
25
00:00:54,551 --> 00:00:56,172
having an eight-year-old
look after you.
26
00:00:56,241 --> 00:00:58,413
Aunt Zelda, you Don'’t have
to look after me anymore.
27
00:00:58,482 --> 00:01:00,965
You and aunt hilda have taught
me everything I need to know.
28
00:01:01,034 --> 00:01:02,689
Now I need to prove
that I can get by
29
00:01:02,758 --> 00:01:04,000
without relying on you guys.
30
00:01:04,068 --> 00:01:05,348
I'’m going to be graduating soon
31
00:01:05,413 --> 00:01:07,653
and i'’m going to be looking
for a new job as a reporter.
32
00:01:07,689 --> 00:01:09,689
So, you Don'’t have to take
care of anyone anymore.
33
00:01:13,275 --> 00:01:19,275
♪ Life'’s changing around me,
and i'’m gonna make it mine ♪
34
00:01:19,344 --> 00:01:25,068
♪ i'’m reaching out
and living by my rules ♪
35
00:01:25,137 --> 00:01:28,482
♪ time'’s moving way too fast ♪
36
00:01:28,551 --> 00:01:32,758
♪ I wanna make it last
37
00:01:34,896 --> 00:01:38,034
♪ '’cause i'’m out
on my own now ♪
38
00:01:38,103 --> 00:01:43,068
♪ and I like the way it feels.
39
00:01:47,931 --> 00:01:49,011
We'’ve got to do something.
40
00:01:49,068 --> 00:01:50,348
Three months
living in this house
41
00:01:50,379 --> 00:01:51,699
and we still run
out of hot water.
42
00:01:51,758 --> 00:01:53,689
I Don'’t know what
you are talking about.
43
00:01:53,758 --> 00:01:55,862
I take a two-hour
shower every morning
44
00:01:55,931 --> 00:01:57,206
and it never runs out.
45
00:01:57,275 --> 00:01:58,355
Is that the mail? Can I have it?
46
00:01:58,379 --> 00:01:59,310
Excuse me.
47
00:01:59,379 --> 00:02:03,172
You are not the
only "occupant" here.
48
00:02:04,896 --> 00:02:06,241
[ Groans]
49
00:02:06,310 --> 00:02:08,320
I can'’t believe I haven'’t
gotten a response to my resume.
50
00:02:08,344 --> 00:02:10,931
Sabrina, you'’ve got
to use connections.
51
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:12,838
I Don'’t know why you
Don'’t take me up on my offer.
52
00:02:12,862 --> 00:02:14,769
I mean, my friend does
write for the village voice.
53
00:02:14,793 --> 00:02:16,413
He writes letters to the editor.
54
00:02:16,482 --> 00:02:17,413
He'’s a crackpot.
55
00:02:17,482 --> 00:02:19,482
A-A published crackpot.
56
00:02:19,551 --> 00:02:21,310
Oh, my god, I won!
57
00:02:21,379 --> 00:02:23,137
I won the mtv contest.
58
00:02:23,206 --> 00:02:24,310
What contest?
59
00:02:24,379 --> 00:02:27,137
It'’s some writing
contest where you...
60
00:02:27,206 --> 00:02:28,620
Oh, it'’s mtv. Who cares?
61
00:02:28,689 --> 00:02:30,172
Wow.
62
00:02:30,241 --> 00:02:32,103
"Based on the essay
that you submitted
63
00:02:32,172 --> 00:02:34,586
"you have been selected
to interview a rock band
64
00:02:34,655 --> 00:02:35,758
for scorchmagazine."
65
00:02:35,827 --> 00:02:37,793
Maybe it'’ll be
the rolling stones.
66
00:02:37,862 --> 00:02:39,620
My Nana would be so tickled.
67
00:02:39,689 --> 00:02:42,413
Great, you bust your butt
trying to get a reporting job.
68
00:02:42,482 --> 00:02:44,241
She gets one by
submitting a 3x5 card
69
00:02:44,310 --> 00:02:45,310
listing her turn-ons.
70
00:02:45,344 --> 00:02:46,355
Hey, that'’s the way it goes.
71
00:02:46,379 --> 00:02:47,310
I'’m happy for her.
72
00:02:47,379 --> 00:02:48,827
It says i'’m supposed to go
73
00:02:48,896 --> 00:02:50,793
to scorchmagazine
for the details.
74
00:02:50,862 --> 00:02:52,310
I'’m out of it. Scorch?
75
00:02:52,379 --> 00:02:55,620
What'’s that, some kind of trade
publication for pyromaniacs?
76
00:02:55,689 --> 00:02:58,379
It'’s only, like, the
coolest magazine ever.
77
00:02:58,448 --> 00:02:59,448
If it weren'’t for them
78
00:02:59,517 --> 00:03:01,655
I wouldn'’t know
what music I like.
79
00:03:01,724 --> 00:03:02,862
Sabrina, get dressed.
80
00:03:02,931 --> 00:03:03,862
Why?
81
00:03:03,931 --> 00:03:05,379
Well, you have to come with me.
82
00:03:05,448 --> 00:03:09,068
I mean, you can do all
that face-to-face stuff.
83
00:03:09,137 --> 00:03:11,827
What I do is write.
84
00:03:11,896 --> 00:03:14,896
And what i'’m thinking
of doing is so wrong.
85
00:03:23,896 --> 00:03:29,689
Wow. Everybody here is so young.
86
00:03:29,758 --> 00:03:34,000
And they all look
so... What'’s the word?
87
00:03:34,068 --> 00:03:35,586
Tragically hip?
88
00:03:35,655 --> 00:03:37,137
Uh, that'’s two words.
89
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,758
Um, excuse me.
90
00:03:40,827 --> 00:03:43,413
My friend is here to find out
about some contest she won.
91
00:03:43,482 --> 00:03:47,586
She'’s supposed to talk to
a senior editor Annie martos.
92
00:03:47,655 --> 00:03:49,551
That'’s me; Why are
you speaking for her?
93
00:03:49,620 --> 00:03:51,827
Uh, where'’s the
little girls'’ room?
94
00:03:51,896 --> 00:03:53,448
I kind of have to tinkle.
95
00:03:53,517 --> 00:03:54,448
I get it.
96
00:03:54,517 --> 00:03:55,517
Come with me.
97
00:03:55,551 --> 00:03:56,689
We'’ll go over the details.
98
00:04:02,034 --> 00:04:03,379
You here for the contest?
99
00:04:03,448 --> 00:04:05,448
Oh, no. My friend
won the contest.
100
00:04:05,517 --> 00:04:07,862
I'’m just along
for moral support.
101
00:04:07,931 --> 00:04:09,000
Period. Close quote.
102
00:04:10,241 --> 00:04:11,344
She punctuates
103
00:04:11,413 --> 00:04:12,517
when she talks.
104
00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:13,758
No, I know this
105
00:04:13,827 --> 00:04:14,862
is none of my business
106
00:04:14,931 --> 00:04:16,734
but the quotes go on
the outside of the period.
107
00:04:16,758 --> 00:04:19,103
Damn, that'’s gutsy.
108
00:04:19,172 --> 00:04:20,172
Exclamation point.
109
00:04:20,241 --> 00:04:22,862
Sorry. Force of habit.
110
00:04:22,931 --> 00:04:24,413
I'’m a writer, too.
111
00:04:24,482 --> 00:04:25,758
Well, not this kind of stuff.
112
00:04:25,827 --> 00:04:27,068
Serious journalism.
113
00:04:27,137 --> 00:04:30,275
Oh, and, uh, this isn'’t
serious journalism?
114
00:04:30,344 --> 00:04:33,137
Kandinsky vodka just
gave us four free cases.
115
00:04:33,206 --> 00:04:34,527
It'’s going to be an
early day, people.
116
00:04:34,551 --> 00:04:36,241
[ Cheering]
117
00:04:36,310 --> 00:04:38,896
Our advertisers love
to give me the freebies.
118
00:04:38,965 --> 00:04:39,965
Hi, i'’m Leonard.
119
00:04:40,034 --> 00:04:41,344
Want a case of vodka?
120
00:04:41,413 --> 00:04:42,655
No, thanks.
121
00:04:42,724 --> 00:04:44,517
No problem. Want
to go out for eggs?
122
00:04:44,586 --> 00:04:45,206
Len.
123
00:04:45,275 --> 00:04:46,206
Too much.
124
00:04:46,275 --> 00:04:47,206
I know, too much.
125
00:04:47,275 --> 00:04:49,103
Sabrina.
126
00:04:49,172 --> 00:04:50,551
I get to go to New York
127
00:04:50,620 --> 00:04:52,241
and interview that
band, course of nature
128
00:04:52,310 --> 00:04:53,896
and write a 1,200
word article about it.
129
00:04:53,965 --> 00:04:55,206
You'’re kidding.
130
00:04:55,275 --> 00:04:57,034
Do you even know 1,200 words?
131
00:04:57,103 --> 00:04:58,448
Plus, I get to
bring two friends.
132
00:04:58,517 --> 00:05:00,655
Well, I doubt this
friend will want to go.
133
00:05:00,724 --> 00:05:03,310
Doesn'’t sound like
serious journalism.
134
00:05:03,379 --> 00:05:05,758
You'’d pass up a trip to mtv?
135
00:05:05,827 --> 00:05:09,068
No, no, i'’ll go...
136
00:05:09,137 --> 00:05:11,586
But only because I have
a very solid connection
137
00:05:11,655 --> 00:05:14,000
at the village voice.
138
00:05:14,068 --> 00:05:16,931
I'’m just following up
on the reporter job.
139
00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:19,310
Yeah, but you got
my resume, right?
140
00:05:19,379 --> 00:05:21,424
Well, what does it matter
if I Don'’t know how to surf?
141
00:05:21,448 --> 00:05:22,493
I'’m a writer, not a surfer.
142
00:05:22,517 --> 00:05:23,517
Fine.
143
00:05:23,551 --> 00:05:25,034
[ Scoffs]
144
00:05:25,103 --> 00:05:27,344
Well, scratch off true
surfer stories monthly.
145
00:05:27,413 --> 00:05:29,413
Salem: Wow, you'’ve
been working the phones
146
00:05:29,482 --> 00:05:31,655
nonstop for the past 24 hours.
147
00:05:31,724 --> 00:05:33,113
I'’ve got to get a
job as a reporter
148
00:05:33,137 --> 00:05:34,758
even if I have to go
as far as New York.
149
00:05:34,827 --> 00:05:36,344
Why do you have
to go to New York?
150
00:05:36,413 --> 00:05:38,758
You'’ve already got an
offer from the Boston globe.
151
00:05:38,827 --> 00:05:40,000
Yeah, three days a week
152
00:05:40,068 --> 00:05:42,620
as an assistant associate
to the associate assistant.
153
00:05:42,689 --> 00:05:44,517
I think i'’m a
little beyond that.
154
00:05:44,586 --> 00:05:46,137
Well, you better get something
155
00:05:46,206 --> 00:05:48,310
or I won'’t be the
only one in this house
156
00:05:48,379 --> 00:05:49,586
that'’s eating cat food.
157
00:05:51,275 --> 00:05:53,896
Herald examiner,
Fleming speaking.
158
00:05:53,965 --> 00:05:55,245
Hi, my name is Sabrina spellman.
159
00:05:55,310 --> 00:05:57,034
I was calling to follow
up about my resume.
160
00:05:57,103 --> 00:05:58,493
Yeah, yeah, it'’s
either in a file drawer
161
00:05:58,517 --> 00:05:59,517
or here in a pile.
162
00:05:59,551 --> 00:06:00,896
I'’ll get to it
when I get to it.
163
00:06:00,965 --> 00:06:02,620
But... uh, hold on.
164
00:06:02,689 --> 00:06:04,172
Hello?
165
00:06:04,241 --> 00:06:06,758
Okay, well, I can either
sit here on hold all day
166
00:06:06,827 --> 00:06:08,448
or I can make something happen.
167
00:06:09,896 --> 00:06:12,379
You sent me a fax?
168
00:06:12,448 --> 00:06:13,482
I-I Don'’t know.
169
00:06:13,551 --> 00:06:15,724
I can'’t find anything
around here.
170
00:06:15,793 --> 00:06:17,275
Get my resume out of the file
171
00:06:17,344 --> 00:06:19,206
and put it right
on top of the pile.
172
00:06:19,275 --> 00:06:21,137
Look, look, I-I Don'’t
know where it is.
173
00:06:21,206 --> 00:06:23,034
Why Don'’t you just
fax me another one?
174
00:06:23,103 --> 00:06:26,586
No, no, better yet,
just bring it over.
175
00:06:26,655 --> 00:06:29,000
Yeah, uh, who am
I talking to again?
176
00:06:29,068 --> 00:06:30,896
Oh, yeah...
177
00:06:30,965 --> 00:06:32,379
Ah, well, how about that?
178
00:06:32,448 --> 00:06:34,241
It'’s right on top.
179
00:06:34,310 --> 00:06:37,172
Well, I can squeeze one more
in tomorrow, all right? 1:00.
180
00:06:40,068 --> 00:06:42,034
This is so exciting.
181
00:06:43,655 --> 00:06:45,103
Hello, New York!
182
00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:46,379
Be careful, Morgan.
183
00:06:46,448 --> 00:06:49,586
New yorkers love
a moving target.
184
00:06:49,655 --> 00:06:51,068
I would'’ve come out earlier
185
00:06:51,137 --> 00:06:52,724
but I was stuck
186
00:06:52,793 --> 00:06:53,896
to a jawbreaker.
187
00:06:53,965 --> 00:06:55,137
Hey, remember our deal.
188
00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:56,379
I bring you to New York
189
00:06:56,448 --> 00:06:59,206
you Don'’t whine, complain
or talk in front of people.
190
00:06:59,275 --> 00:07:00,448
Don'’t worry.
191
00:07:00,517 --> 00:07:02,482
While you gals run
your little mtv junket
192
00:07:02,551 --> 00:07:04,068
i'’m going to
take in the sights.
193
00:07:04,137 --> 00:07:05,206
I'’m not going to mtv.
194
00:07:05,275 --> 00:07:07,137
I have that interview
at the herald examiner.
195
00:07:07,206 --> 00:07:08,275
I really need this job
196
00:07:08,344 --> 00:07:10,310
and i'’m not leaving
until they give it to me.
197
00:07:10,379 --> 00:07:13,551
Mm, the new Sabrina is feisty.
198
00:07:13,620 --> 00:07:15,103
Me likey.
199
00:07:15,172 --> 00:07:17,206
It'’s just part of a hot dog.
200
00:07:17,275 --> 00:07:18,896
It'’s their way of
saying, "welcome."
201
00:07:18,965 --> 00:07:21,344
Well, they can throw
whatever they want.
202
00:07:21,413 --> 00:07:23,586
They can'’t stop me
from going to mtv.
203
00:07:23,655 --> 00:07:24,655
Me, neither.
204
00:07:24,689 --> 00:07:25,700
I can'’t wait to go on trl.
205
00:07:25,724 --> 00:07:26,724
You? You Don'’t seem
206
00:07:26,758 --> 00:07:28,448
like a total request
live kind of person.
207
00:07:28,517 --> 00:07:29,793
Of course not.
208
00:07:29,862 --> 00:07:32,965
But i'’ll blend in with all the
desperate, squealing teenyboppers
209
00:07:33,034 --> 00:07:35,551
cozy up to Carson daly and
as soon as i'’m on camera
210
00:07:35,620 --> 00:07:37,379
demand that people
stop eating meat.
211
00:07:37,448 --> 00:07:39,793
I'’m not sure trlis the
place for a protest.
212
00:07:39,862 --> 00:07:41,862
I mean, it'’s not
like it'’s the oscars.
213
00:07:41,931 --> 00:07:43,586
Oh, sir, can you pull over here?
214
00:07:43,655 --> 00:07:45,010
All right, i'’ll meet
you guys later.
215
00:07:45,034 --> 00:07:46,310
Oh, no, no, no.
216
00:07:46,379 --> 00:07:48,413
You have to help
me with the interview.
217
00:07:48,482 --> 00:07:50,000
Morgan, my herald
examiner meeting
218
00:07:50,068 --> 00:07:51,310
is in 47 minutes.
219
00:07:51,379 --> 00:07:53,241
I have to prepare
to be spontaneous.
220
00:07:53,310 --> 00:07:54,241
You'’ll be fine.
221
00:07:54,310 --> 00:07:55,493
I Don'’t know how to interview.
222
00:07:55,517 --> 00:07:56,724
I can'’t write.
223
00:07:56,793 --> 00:07:59,068
I stole a writing sample
of yours for the contest.
224
00:08:00,275 --> 00:08:01,586
You did what?
225
00:08:01,655 --> 00:08:03,586
Morgan, what a
lousy thing to do.
226
00:08:03,655 --> 00:08:05,172
You totally used Sabrina.
227
00:08:05,241 --> 00:08:07,310
My writing sample won?
228
00:08:07,379 --> 00:08:09,034
Wow.
229
00:08:09,103 --> 00:08:10,862
To mtv.
230
00:08:10,931 --> 00:08:12,655
And step on it.
231
00:08:12,724 --> 00:08:14,034
[ Screaming]
232
00:08:20,275 --> 00:08:22,551
You won the contest,
you meet the band.
233
00:08:22,620 --> 00:08:24,517
You two meet the street.
234
00:08:24,586 --> 00:08:27,724
But they-they have to go in.
235
00:08:27,793 --> 00:08:29,241
Yeah, we'’re interpreters.
236
00:08:29,310 --> 00:08:30,344
One of the band members
237
00:08:30,413 --> 00:08:32,758
is French and the
other is German.
238
00:08:32,827 --> 00:08:34,620
N'’est pas, mein... kampf?
239
00:08:35,758 --> 00:08:36,758
Guard: That'’s a nice try.
240
00:08:36,793 --> 00:08:39,413
You'’ll have to
wait in the lobby.
241
00:08:44,827 --> 00:08:46,137
My teeth!
242
00:08:47,344 --> 00:08:48,620
Well, uh, at least
243
00:08:48,689 --> 00:08:50,965
now he has something
he wants for Christmas.
244
00:08:52,172 --> 00:08:54,620
[ Knocking on door]
245
00:08:54,689 --> 00:08:57,000
Oh, hi, hi, we'’re here from...
246
00:08:57,068 --> 00:08:58,379
Yeah, can you
give us just a sec.
247
00:08:58,448 --> 00:08:59,728
We'’ve got to finish working out
248
00:08:59,793 --> 00:09:01,517
this one part.
249
00:09:01,586 --> 00:09:04,034
[ Hard rock intro]
250
00:09:07,103 --> 00:09:09,931
♪ What if I missed you
251
00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:15,482
♪ you got caught in the sun
252
00:09:19,034 --> 00:09:22,413
♪ what if I did something
253
00:09:22,482 --> 00:09:27,551
♪ never to be undone...
254
00:09:35,379 --> 00:09:37,620
Um, do you give know,
"oops, I did it again"?
255
00:09:37,689 --> 00:09:39,137
Uh, why Don'’t you just jump in
256
00:09:39,206 --> 00:09:40,448
with the interview questions?
257
00:09:40,517 --> 00:09:41,758
I just did.
258
00:09:41,827 --> 00:09:42,758
Look, ask him, uh
259
00:09:42,827 --> 00:09:43,931
what his influences are.
260
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:48,862
So, who influenced
you to... cut your hair
261
00:09:48,931 --> 00:09:50,275
so short?
262
00:09:50,344 --> 00:09:52,620
Okay, uh, what
distinguishes course of nature
263
00:09:52,689 --> 00:09:53,689
from other bands?
264
00:09:53,758 --> 00:09:56,620
Well, for one thing,
we'’re not conventional.
265
00:09:56,689 --> 00:09:58,931
Don'’t play conventions.
266
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:00,862
No, I mean
267
00:10:00,931 --> 00:10:02,827
we Don'’t do the
usual rock band thing.
268
00:10:02,896 --> 00:10:04,862
Um, partying all
night, getting wasted.
269
00:10:04,931 --> 00:10:06,103
I Don'’t even drink.
270
00:10:06,172 --> 00:10:09,137
Well, not with all those
piercings... you'’d leak.
271
00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:12,724
I think she'’s going
to be just fine.
272
00:10:12,793 --> 00:10:13,724
Don'’t leave me.
273
00:10:13,793 --> 00:10:14,931
Morgan, I have to get
274
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:16,355
to my interview at
the herald examiner
275
00:10:16,379 --> 00:10:18,251
before my dream job gets
taken by somebody else.
276
00:10:18,275 --> 00:10:19,795
Just ask whatever
comes into your head.
277
00:10:22,551 --> 00:10:24,103
This could take a while.
278
00:10:27,172 --> 00:10:29,379
Oh, i'’ve got one.
279
00:10:29,448 --> 00:10:32,448
Who here doesn'’t
have a girlfriend?
280
00:10:32,517 --> 00:10:34,344
[ Applause]
281
00:10:34,413 --> 00:10:37,413
All right, there you have
your little favorite Canadian
282
00:10:37,482 --> 00:10:39,344
avril lavigne and
"skaterboy" at number three.
283
00:10:39,413 --> 00:10:40,448
Avril lavigne no stranger
284
00:10:40,517 --> 00:10:41,551
to the top ten...
285
00:10:41,620 --> 00:10:43,355
Roxie, i'’m going to
be late for my interview.
286
00:10:43,379 --> 00:10:45,482
But I need your help
and so do a million cows.
287
00:10:45,551 --> 00:10:47,724
Now, when we get next to
Carson, i'’ll show my shirt
288
00:10:47,793 --> 00:10:49,275
and then you show yours.
289
00:10:49,344 --> 00:10:51,931
Can I just wear one that
says, "i'’m with stupid"?
290
00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:53,280
Anybody want to
give a shout-out?
291
00:10:53,310 --> 00:10:54,896
Anybody?
292
00:10:54,965 --> 00:10:55,793
Back here?
293
00:10:55,862 --> 00:10:57,344
How about you, right over here?
294
00:10:57,413 --> 00:10:59,310
Who do you want to
give a shout-out to?
295
00:10:59,379 --> 00:11:01,689
Carson daly.
296
00:11:01,758 --> 00:11:03,310
That'’s me, but
who do you want...?
297
00:11:03,379 --> 00:11:04,413
What'’s this all about?
298
00:11:04,482 --> 00:11:05,413
It says, "meat."
299
00:11:05,482 --> 00:11:06,803
That'’s no way to
refer to yourself.
300
00:11:06,827 --> 00:11:07,827
Oh, no, no, no.
301
00:11:07,862 --> 00:11:09,782
Um, she-she has a-a
message she wants to get out.
302
00:11:09,827 --> 00:11:10,758
Right, roxie?
303
00:11:10,827 --> 00:11:11,758
Okay, what is that?
304
00:11:11,827 --> 00:11:12,758
Carson daly...
305
00:11:12,827 --> 00:11:13,689
The message...
306
00:11:13,758 --> 00:11:14,689
What'’s this say?
307
00:11:14,758 --> 00:11:15,758
"Kills meat."
308
00:11:15,793 --> 00:11:19,310
You guys are a member
of the Ted nugent fan club?
309
00:11:19,379 --> 00:11:21,965
[ Laughter]
310
00:11:22,034 --> 00:11:23,137
Anything?
311
00:11:23,206 --> 00:11:24,896
Okay, anybody want
to give a shout-out
312
00:11:24,965 --> 00:11:26,137
that'’s not on medication?
313
00:11:26,206 --> 00:11:27,655
How about you over here?
314
00:11:27,724 --> 00:11:29,700
Oh, roxie, i'’m sorry the
message got all messed up.
315
00:11:29,724 --> 00:11:31,206
I can'’t believe how hot he is
316
00:11:31,275 --> 00:11:32,931
and how great
it is to be on trl!
317
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:35,034
[ Screaming]
318
00:11:35,103 --> 00:11:37,034
Oh, way to fight
the power, roxie.
319
00:11:37,103 --> 00:11:38,793
Oh, no, my interview.
320
00:11:38,862 --> 00:11:41,241
Must'’ve taken a wrong turn.
321
00:11:41,310 --> 00:11:46,827
Whoa, if this is hell'’s kitchen,
i'’d hate to see the bathroom.
322
00:11:46,896 --> 00:11:48,103
Okay
323
00:11:48,172 --> 00:11:49,689
that is one big rat.
324
00:11:49,758 --> 00:11:50,793
[ Chuckling]
325
00:11:50,862 --> 00:11:52,793
Hey, hi, uh, what'’s up, bro?
326
00:11:52,862 --> 00:11:53,896
About those teeth?
327
00:11:53,965 --> 00:11:55,655
A little bleach will help that.
328
00:12:00,034 --> 00:12:01,896
Sorry i'’m late.
329
00:12:01,965 --> 00:12:02,896
And you are?
330
00:12:02,965 --> 00:12:04,448
Way out of shape.
331
00:12:04,517 --> 00:12:06,137
I'’m Sabrina
spellman, your 1:00ish.
332
00:12:06,206 --> 00:12:08,068
Oh, well, the important
thing is you'’re here.
333
00:12:08,137 --> 00:12:09,275
I need someone right away.
334
00:12:09,344 --> 00:12:10,275
Really?
335
00:12:10,344 --> 00:12:11,793
Great. All right.
336
00:12:11,862 --> 00:12:15,000
Details: I like my coffee
black, my pencil sharp
337
00:12:15,068 --> 00:12:17,000
and someone who'’s not
afraid to ask questions.
338
00:12:17,068 --> 00:12:18,137
Well, I have a question?
339
00:12:18,206 --> 00:12:20,166
Why would I need to know
how you like your coffee?
340
00:12:20,206 --> 00:12:22,246
Well, that'’s what any good
secretary needs to know.
341
00:12:22,275 --> 00:12:23,482
Secretary.
342
00:12:23,551 --> 00:12:26,275
Yeah, well, that'’s not
exactly my dream job
343
00:12:26,344 --> 00:12:27,758
but I guess it'’s a start.
344
00:12:27,827 --> 00:12:29,034
Well, absolutely.
345
00:12:29,103 --> 00:12:31,137
If you play your cards
right, do a good job
346
00:12:31,206 --> 00:12:33,000
ten to 15 years, you
work your way up
347
00:12:33,068 --> 00:12:35,379
to executive secretary.
348
00:12:35,448 --> 00:12:36,448
Is there a problem?
349
00:12:36,517 --> 00:12:38,137
Yeah, a big one.
350
00:12:38,206 --> 00:12:40,275
For starters, I Don'’t
have any secretarial skills
351
00:12:40,344 --> 00:12:41,379
and when I make coffee
352
00:12:41,448 --> 00:12:43,137
it comes out tasting
like witches brew.
353
00:12:43,206 --> 00:12:44,379
Literally.
354
00:12:44,448 --> 00:12:45,655
Well, then why are you here?
355
00:12:45,724 --> 00:12:47,517
For a job as a reporter.
356
00:12:47,586 --> 00:12:50,586
No, no, no, your resume
was in the secretary pile.
357
00:12:50,655 --> 00:12:53,172
Look, I came all the
way here from Boston.
358
00:12:53,241 --> 00:12:55,862
Could you at least
read my writing sample?
359
00:12:55,931 --> 00:12:58,137
This is an article I wrote
for the Boston citizen.
360
00:12:58,206 --> 00:13:00,413
I blew the lid off a phony
baked bean scandal.
361
00:13:00,482 --> 00:13:03,103
Well, the lead'’s quite catchy.
362
00:13:03,172 --> 00:13:04,172
But...
363
00:13:04,206 --> 00:13:05,620
But what?
364
00:13:05,689 --> 00:13:07,551
Well, a reporter at
the herald examiner
365
00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:09,275
needs to be a little
more seasoned.
366
00:13:09,344 --> 00:13:10,758
I mean, why Don'’t
we agree to talk
367
00:13:10,827 --> 00:13:12,827
when you'’ve had a little
more writing experience
368
00:13:12,896 --> 00:13:14,103
and, uh, matured a little.
369
00:13:14,172 --> 00:13:15,724
Oh, I am very mature.
370
00:13:15,793 --> 00:13:18,793
I was just at mtv, and
between you and me
371
00:13:18,862 --> 00:13:21,172
all that screaming
gave me a headache.
372
00:13:21,241 --> 00:13:22,517
Kids, huh?
373
00:13:22,586 --> 00:13:24,344
You were at mtv.
374
00:13:24,413 --> 00:13:26,655
Yeah, one of my friends was
hanging out with a rock band
375
00:13:26,724 --> 00:13:28,931
and the other one needed
me there because she'’s on trl.
376
00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:31,344
Trl? my god, it
seems like every day
377
00:13:31,413 --> 00:13:33,172
they'’re into some new drug.
378
00:13:33,241 --> 00:13:35,310
No, no, no, trlis...
379
00:13:35,379 --> 00:13:37,206
Look, you'’re obviously
a very fine writer
380
00:13:37,275 --> 00:13:40,206
and, uh, you have a lot
of youthful exuberance.
381
00:13:40,275 --> 00:13:43,689
So why Don'’t we agree to
talk when that wears off, okay?
382
00:13:48,344 --> 00:13:49,896
Okay, just a little
setback, no biggie.
383
00:13:49,965 --> 00:13:51,245
I mean, I said I could get along
384
00:13:51,310 --> 00:13:52,689
on my own, and I
can, right, Salem?
385
00:13:52,758 --> 00:13:54,000
What do I care?
386
00:13:54,068 --> 00:13:56,000
I got beat up by a rat.
387
00:13:56,068 --> 00:13:57,517
He humiliated me.
388
00:13:57,586 --> 00:14:00,413
I thought you said
you gave hima licking?
389
00:14:00,482 --> 00:14:02,620
I did!
390
00:14:02,689 --> 00:14:03,689
But not in a macho way.
391
00:14:03,758 --> 00:14:05,620
I'’m sorry, Salem, I
have bigger problems.
392
00:14:05,689 --> 00:14:07,241
Just butch it up.
393
00:14:07,310 --> 00:14:08,862
Hmm. Butch it up.
394
00:14:08,931 --> 00:14:12,586
That'’s an idea...
Work out a little.
395
00:14:12,655 --> 00:14:14,068
[ Groaning]: One...
396
00:14:14,137 --> 00:14:16,103
[ Groaning]
397
00:14:16,172 --> 00:14:18,137
Sabrina, can you help me?
398
00:14:18,206 --> 00:14:22,206
I Don'’t know what to
write about course of nature.
399
00:14:22,275 --> 00:14:24,310
Well, just use your notes.
400
00:14:24,379 --> 00:14:26,551
"Lead singer... dreamy.
401
00:14:26,620 --> 00:14:28,689
"Guitarist... married.
402
00:14:28,758 --> 00:14:31,241
Drummer... Ignored me. Gay?"
403
00:14:35,827 --> 00:14:37,482
What i'’m saying
is, be resourceful.
404
00:14:37,551 --> 00:14:39,103
There'’s all kinds
of information
405
00:14:39,172 --> 00:14:40,965
on the Internet,
in their liner notes
406
00:14:41,034 --> 00:14:42,655
or you can contact
their fan club.
407
00:14:42,724 --> 00:14:43,965
[ Sighs]
408
00:14:44,034 --> 00:14:45,793
Boy, that sounds
like a lot of work.
409
00:14:45,862 --> 00:14:47,931
Hey, Sabrina, why Don'’t
you write the article?
410
00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:51,137
Fine. I'’ll write it... But
i'’m taking the credit.
411
00:14:51,206 --> 00:14:52,896
No more fronting for you.
412
00:14:52,965 --> 00:14:56,103
I would never take credit
for something that you wrote.
413
00:14:58,206 --> 00:15:00,344
Twice in one week.
414
00:15:04,758 --> 00:15:06,172
So, how'’d it go in New York?
415
00:15:06,241 --> 00:15:08,379
You know, with that
connection of yours.
416
00:15:08,448 --> 00:15:11,793
Oh. Oh, I decided that
newspaper job just wasn'’t for me.
417
00:15:11,862 --> 00:15:12,862
Oh, good choice.
418
00:15:12,896 --> 00:15:14,551
I mean, you'’d
have to move there.
419
00:15:14,620 --> 00:15:17,275
Plus, you'’d need a bicycle
and a good throwing arm.
420
00:15:17,344 --> 00:15:18,827
It'’s very well written.
421
00:15:18,896 --> 00:15:20,931
Thank you. It came very easily.
422
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,310
Sometimes when
the muse strikes...
423
00:15:23,379 --> 00:15:24,310
Okay, she wrote it
424
00:15:24,379 --> 00:15:25,862
but I tried to write
about the band
425
00:15:25,931 --> 00:15:27,827
but then I ran out of
words for "cute" and...
426
00:15:27,896 --> 00:15:30,000
I absolutely do not care.
427
00:15:30,068 --> 00:15:31,217
Well, i'’m glad you liked it.
428
00:15:31,241 --> 00:15:32,379
We haven'’t discussed money.
429
00:15:32,448 --> 00:15:34,689
I Don'’t know what the
going rate is these days, but...
430
00:15:34,758 --> 00:15:36,103
How does ten cents a word sound?
431
00:15:36,172 --> 00:15:37,413
Oh, i'’ll give you a quarter
432
00:15:37,482 --> 00:15:38,482
just to stop talking.
433
00:15:38,551 --> 00:15:39,655
How about that?
434
00:15:39,724 --> 00:15:40,758
I already got a raise.
435
00:15:40,827 --> 00:15:42,413
This article was for a contest.
436
00:15:42,482 --> 00:15:44,137
We Don'’t pay for
it and, in this case
437
00:15:44,206 --> 00:15:45,448
we Don'’t publish it.
438
00:15:45,517 --> 00:15:47,689
Here, you might want to
send this to your mother.
439
00:15:47,758 --> 00:15:49,137
She can tack it
up on her fridge.
440
00:15:50,862 --> 00:15:53,275
But I thought you
said you liked it.
441
00:15:53,344 --> 00:15:55,482
I said it was very well written
442
00:15:55,551 --> 00:15:58,724
very professional, very
well researched, very bland.
443
00:15:58,793 --> 00:16:00,448
Are you calling
my writing bland?
444
00:16:00,517 --> 00:16:03,206
No, I think i'’m calling
the author bland.
445
00:16:03,275 --> 00:16:06,275
Anything written in scorch
magazine represents
446
00:16:06,344 --> 00:16:07,931
a certain point of view.
447
00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:09,448
I mean, look around.
448
00:16:09,517 --> 00:16:10,862
These people
have life experience.
449
00:16:10,931 --> 00:16:11,931
Cole was in a rock band
450
00:16:11,965 --> 00:16:13,310
that used to open for green day.
451
00:16:13,379 --> 00:16:15,034
James has traveled
to every continent.
452
00:16:15,103 --> 00:16:16,241
Leonard is...
453
00:16:16,310 --> 00:16:18,172
The publisher'’s
cousin, but the point is
454
00:16:18,241 --> 00:16:19,517
when I look at you
455
00:16:19,586 --> 00:16:21,793
i'’m guessing your
life comes down to...
456
00:16:21,862 --> 00:16:24,827
Oh, a junior high certificate
for perfect attendance
457
00:16:24,896 --> 00:16:26,793
and maybe once you smoked a ham.
458
00:16:26,862 --> 00:16:28,724
This may come at a bad time
459
00:16:28,793 --> 00:16:31,310
but I still have
some of that vodka.
460
00:16:31,379 --> 00:16:32,620
Len.len.
461
00:16:32,689 --> 00:16:33,620
Worth a shot.
462
00:16:33,689 --> 00:16:34,827
Let'’s go.
463
00:16:37,862 --> 00:16:39,862
Everyone keeps telling
me I need more experience.
464
00:16:39,931 --> 00:16:41,379
At this rate, i'’ll
never find a job.
465
00:16:41,448 --> 00:16:42,596
What happened
to the part-time job
466
00:16:42,620 --> 00:16:43,941
you were offered
at the Boston globe?
467
00:16:43,965 --> 00:16:46,965
The job'’s taken... By
my journalism professor.
468
00:16:47,034 --> 00:16:50,758
Oh, Sabrina, you really blew it.
469
00:16:53,620 --> 00:16:55,275
Honey, put this behind you.
470
00:16:55,344 --> 00:16:57,275
You'’ve been going
on and on about it.
471
00:16:57,344 --> 00:16:58,827
You'’ve got to stop obsessing.
472
00:16:58,896 --> 00:17:00,103
Oh, my god, trlis on.
473
00:17:00,172 --> 00:17:01,172
Out of my way.
474
00:17:03,482 --> 00:17:05,344
All right, there you have it.
475
00:17:05,413 --> 00:17:06,862
Everybody loves eminem.
476
00:17:06,931 --> 00:17:10,241
Yeah, do it, Carson!
477
00:17:10,310 --> 00:17:11,827
Okay, getting carried away.
478
00:17:11,896 --> 00:17:13,827
Dial it down.
479
00:17:13,896 --> 00:17:15,172
Cold Turkey.
480
00:17:15,241 --> 00:17:16,827
Cold Turkey, yeah.
481
00:17:16,896 --> 00:17:18,172
Yeah, talk about obsessed.
482
00:17:18,241 --> 00:17:19,482
No, i'’m going to the kitchen
483
00:17:19,551 --> 00:17:20,482
to make a sandwich.
484
00:17:20,551 --> 00:17:21,551
Don'’t turn that off.
485
00:17:23,551 --> 00:17:25,517
At number seven it'’s
your favorite Australian.
486
00:17:25,586 --> 00:17:28,172
[ Brooklyn accent]: Move,
you'’re blocking the view.
487
00:17:28,241 --> 00:17:29,689
This is Kylie Minogue on trl.
488
00:17:29,758 --> 00:17:31,638
Whoa! Someone got into
the kibbles and steroids.
489
00:17:31,689 --> 00:17:35,034
Next time you go into the
big apple, take me with you.
490
00:17:35,103 --> 00:17:38,586
I want to deliver a little
message to my friend ratso.
491
00:17:40,448 --> 00:17:42,965
Yeah, I got a message
I want to deliver, too.
492
00:17:45,482 --> 00:17:46,827
Sorry, roxie.
493
00:17:48,206 --> 00:17:49,551
Cable'’s out!
494
00:17:51,379 --> 00:17:53,379
Okay, whatever you'’re
doing, we got to do it fast.
495
00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:55,931
We got to get back before roxie
and Morgan know we'’re gone.
496
00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:58,344
Don'’t worry. It will
only take a second
497
00:17:58,413 --> 00:18:01,172
for me to turn that
rodent into rat-a-touie.
498
00:18:06,517 --> 00:18:09,172
All right, guys, before
we get to our next video
499
00:18:09,241 --> 00:18:11,034
i'’m going to give
this young man
500
00:18:11,103 --> 00:18:13,448
an opportunity to say
something to america.
501
00:18:13,517 --> 00:18:16,103
Or her... survival of
the fittest on trltoday.
502
00:18:16,172 --> 00:18:17,275
What'’s your request?
503
00:18:17,344 --> 00:18:19,482
I want a job.
504
00:18:19,551 --> 00:18:21,758
Okay. What is that,
the new o-town single?
505
00:18:21,827 --> 00:18:23,147
No, no, no, i'’m
talking about me.
506
00:18:23,206 --> 00:18:24,275
I know this sounds crazy.
507
00:18:24,344 --> 00:18:25,517
My name is Sabrina spellman.
508
00:18:25,586 --> 00:18:27,241
I'’m a journalist
and I can'’t find a job.
509
00:18:27,310 --> 00:18:28,827
I mean, i'’ve gotten
a few job offers
510
00:18:28,896 --> 00:18:30,176
but, you know, I
said no to them.
511
00:18:30,241 --> 00:18:31,655
Long story short, i'’m an idiot.
512
00:18:31,724 --> 00:18:33,896
There'’s going to be a job
in security opening up here.
513
00:18:33,965 --> 00:18:35,165
Maybe you could have that one.
514
00:18:35,206 --> 00:18:36,137
Good luck to you.
515
00:18:36,206 --> 00:18:37,137
We got to get over here.
516
00:18:37,206 --> 00:18:38,137
Does security ever
517
00:18:38,206 --> 00:18:39,931
lead to reporting on the air?
518
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:41,896
All right, cheese breath.
519
00:18:41,965 --> 00:18:44,620
It'’s you and me,
right here, right now.
520
00:18:44,689 --> 00:18:46,206
Oh, you brought
some of your friends
521
00:18:46,275 --> 00:18:47,206
from the sewer, huh?
522
00:18:47,275 --> 00:18:48,862
Oh, please.
523
00:18:49,689 --> 00:18:50,758
Not the face.
524
00:18:51,827 --> 00:18:52,758
Hi, welcome back.
525
00:18:52,827 --> 00:18:54,000
New York City. Times Square.
526
00:18:54,068 --> 00:18:55,548
I'’m Carson daly,
trl. We'’re going...
527
00:18:55,586 --> 00:18:56,965
I'’m sorry, Carson,
one last thing.
528
00:18:57,034 --> 00:18:58,827
I just want to say to
all you guys out there
529
00:18:58,896 --> 00:19:01,137
make sure you know a good
opportunity when you see it.
530
00:19:01,206 --> 00:19:03,103
Okay? People aren'’t
just going to hand you
531
00:19:03,172 --> 00:19:04,724
your dream job
on a silver platter.
532
00:19:04,793 --> 00:19:06,206
In fact, if they give you a job
533
00:19:06,275 --> 00:19:07,862
carrying a silver
platter, take it.
534
00:19:07,931 --> 00:19:10,620
What i'’m saying is, whether
it'’s an established publication
535
00:19:10,689 --> 00:19:12,172
like the New York
herald-examiner
536
00:19:12,241 --> 00:19:14,103
or a pretentious
upstart zine like scorch
537
00:19:14,172 --> 00:19:16,068
Don'’t be too proud
to start at the bottom.
538
00:19:16,137 --> 00:19:17,827
Anything else?
539
00:19:17,896 --> 00:19:18,896
Uh...
540
00:19:18,965 --> 00:19:19,896
Meat kills! Woo-hoo!
541
00:19:19,965 --> 00:19:20,896
All right, guys.
542
00:19:20,965 --> 00:19:21,965
Sorry.
543
00:19:22,034 --> 00:19:23,793
Sorry about that, everybody.
544
00:19:23,862 --> 00:19:25,241
All right...
545
00:19:25,310 --> 00:19:26,620
Okay, if you called me down here
546
00:19:26,689 --> 00:19:28,649
to tell me i'’ll never work
in this business again
547
00:19:28,689 --> 00:19:30,206
I figured that out for myself
548
00:19:30,275 --> 00:19:32,493
and that'’s why i'’m done with
this whole stupid job search
549
00:19:32,517 --> 00:19:34,482
and, who knows, maybe
even journalism altogether.
550
00:19:34,551 --> 00:19:35,991
Just because I
Don'’t have green hair
551
00:19:36,034 --> 00:19:37,689
and metal things
sticking out of my face
552
00:19:37,758 --> 00:19:40,198
doesn'’t mean i'’m not a good
writer, period, end of sentence.
553
00:19:41,482 --> 00:19:42,689
Annie: Fine.
554
00:19:42,758 --> 00:19:44,678
I'’ll tell Jonathan you'’re
turning down the job.
555
00:19:44,724 --> 00:19:45,965
Job?
556
00:19:46,034 --> 00:19:47,137
I called you down here
557
00:19:47,206 --> 00:19:49,034
because i'’m offering
you a position.
558
00:19:49,103 --> 00:19:50,517
Actually, our publisher is.
559
00:19:50,586 --> 00:19:53,000
The only thing i'’d offer
you is a new wardrobe.
560
00:19:53,068 --> 00:19:54,068
That'’s... insane.
561
00:19:54,137 --> 00:19:55,896
Why would the
publisher offer me a job?
562
00:19:55,965 --> 00:19:57,517
That was my question exactly
563
00:19:57,586 --> 00:19:58,896
except with profanity.
564
00:19:58,965 --> 00:20:00,655
Apparently Jonathan
caught you on trl.
565
00:20:00,724 --> 00:20:01,793
Liked what he saw.
566
00:20:01,862 --> 00:20:03,413
Of course, he hired
me because he said
567
00:20:03,482 --> 00:20:04,827
I remind him of Diana Ross.
568
00:20:04,896 --> 00:20:07,079
It doesn'’t matter... she'’s
not interested in this gig.
569
00:20:07,103 --> 00:20:09,034
I mean, it'’s not serious
journalism, right?
570
00:20:09,103 --> 00:20:10,275
He saw me on TV?
571
00:20:10,344 --> 00:20:12,620
Do you happen to know if
he taped it? Cause I forgot.
572
00:20:12,689 --> 00:20:13,620
I'’ll tell him you can'’t do it.
573
00:20:13,689 --> 00:20:14,803
What'’s new on the club scene?
574
00:20:14,827 --> 00:20:17,034
Excuse me. I cando it.
575
00:20:17,103 --> 00:20:18,172
Yeah, I get it, Bo-peep.
576
00:20:18,241 --> 00:20:19,517
The job'’s not right for you.
577
00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:20,896
Okay, the name'’s not Bo-peep
578
00:20:20,965 --> 00:20:22,586
and the job may
not be right for me
579
00:20:22,655 --> 00:20:23,862
but i'’m right for the job.
580
00:20:23,931 --> 00:20:24,965
I just want to make
581
00:20:25,034 --> 00:20:26,655
that fine yet
important distinction.
582
00:20:26,724 --> 00:20:27,862
Can do it, Don'’t want to.
583
00:20:27,931 --> 00:20:28,862
So you'’ll take it.
584
00:20:28,931 --> 00:20:30,091
Yes, please. When do I start?
585
00:20:37,275 --> 00:20:38,931
Okay, smoothies all around.
586
00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:42,586
Time for a toast to
Sabrina'’s new job.
587
00:20:42,655 --> 00:20:45,034
Morgan did you leave
your laundry on the table?
588
00:20:45,103 --> 00:20:47,034
No, that'’s Salem.
589
00:20:47,103 --> 00:20:48,034
He got into the gauze.
590
00:20:48,103 --> 00:20:49,206
Ow!
591
00:20:49,275 --> 00:20:50,379
Did you hear that?
592
00:20:50,448 --> 00:20:53,000
Me-ow.
42073
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