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1
00:00:03,241 --> 00:00:05,793
Hey, what'’s going on here?
2
00:00:05,862 --> 00:00:06,931
Two minutes ago
3
00:00:07,000 --> 00:00:09,310
there were half a dozen
gingerbread men on this tray
4
00:00:09,379 --> 00:00:10,310
now there'’s only one.
5
00:00:10,379 --> 00:00:11,482
[ Belches]
6
00:00:11,551 --> 00:00:13,068
Got milk?
7
00:00:13,137 --> 00:00:14,137
Got magic.
8
00:00:16,620 --> 00:00:17,620
Hi, Sabrina.
9
00:00:17,655 --> 00:00:20,896
Hi. Hey, gingerbread
cookies, my favorite.
10
00:00:20,965 --> 00:00:21,965
There you go.
11
00:00:22,034 --> 00:00:24,172
Hey, happy birthday, baby.
12
00:00:24,241 --> 00:00:25,793
Wow, a sleazy talking cookie.
13
00:00:25,862 --> 00:00:27,413
You guys are too good to me.
14
00:00:27,482 --> 00:00:29,965
Once again, not enough
sugar and too much attitude.
15
00:00:30,034 --> 00:00:31,172
Cookie: Ouch!
16
00:00:31,241 --> 00:00:33,620
Listen, I know it'’s usually
just us at my birthday dinner
17
00:00:33,689 --> 00:00:35,689
but would it be okay if
I invited Josh this year?
18
00:00:35,758 --> 00:00:37,965
Hey, it would be my
pleasure to open my home
19
00:00:38,034 --> 00:00:40,931
to the ungrateful employee
who quit on me with no notice.
20
00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:43,241
What she means is it
would be our pleasure
21
00:00:43,310 --> 00:00:44,655
to have Josh for dinner.
22
00:00:44,724 --> 00:00:46,286
Good, '’cause I already
told him he could come.
23
00:00:46,310 --> 00:00:46,862
See you tomorrow.
24
00:00:46,931 --> 00:00:48,172
[ Muffled yelling]
25
00:00:48,241 --> 00:00:50,344
He'’s even more
annoying muzzled.
26
00:00:50,413 --> 00:00:52,379
[ Shrill ringing]
27
00:00:52,448 --> 00:00:53,758
Speaking of annoying.
28
00:00:53,827 --> 00:00:56,275
[ Shrill ringing continues]
29
00:00:56,344 --> 00:00:59,482
Icicles. That can only
be great-aunt Irma.
30
00:00:59,551 --> 00:01:01,034
Who'’s aunt Irma?
31
00:01:01,103 --> 00:01:02,758
Matriarch of the spellman clan
32
00:01:02,827 --> 00:01:05,241
and dreaded holy
terror of the other realm.
33
00:01:05,310 --> 00:01:06,724
Answer it, hilda.
34
00:01:06,793 --> 00:01:10,620
Me? You'’re the
oldest... And the prettiest.
35
00:01:13,068 --> 00:01:14,413
Too late.
36
00:01:14,482 --> 00:01:15,793
Aunt Irma, what a...
37
00:01:15,862 --> 00:01:16,758
Silence![ Thunder crashes]
38
00:01:16,827 --> 00:01:17,862
Okay, you talk.
39
00:01:17,931 --> 00:01:19,862
I'’ve just learned that Sabrina
40
00:01:19,931 --> 00:01:23,689
has revealed she'’s a witch to
a mortal named Harvey kinkle.
41
00:01:23,758 --> 00:01:25,206
Where have you been, toots?
42
00:01:25,275 --> 00:01:26,379
That'’s old news.
43
00:01:26,448 --> 00:01:27,896
Hilda, Zelda
44
00:01:27,965 --> 00:01:30,448
this was an appalling
error in judgment
45
00:01:30,517 --> 00:01:33,000
for which I hold you
both responsible.
46
00:01:33,068 --> 00:01:35,413
But I assure you, Harvey'’s
completely trustworthy.
47
00:01:35,482 --> 00:01:36,482
Silence!
48
00:01:37,344 --> 00:01:39,689
I will determine if
the boy is trustworthy.
49
00:01:39,758 --> 00:01:42,965
Have Sabrina bring him here
tomorrow for the inquisition.
50
00:01:43,034 --> 00:01:46,103
Inquisition? But tomorrow
is Sabrina'’s birthday.
51
00:01:46,172 --> 00:01:48,689
Perfect. 12 hours
of interrogation
52
00:01:48,758 --> 00:01:50,689
followed by a sheet cake.
53
00:01:50,758 --> 00:01:52,448
[ Cackling]
54
00:01:54,689 --> 00:01:55,413
Oh, my god.
55
00:01:55,482 --> 00:01:57,206
With aunt Irma
interrogating Harvey
56
00:01:57,275 --> 00:01:59,896
we can'’t have Josh here
for Sabrina'’s birthday.
57
00:01:59,965 --> 00:02:02,620
Who'’s going to break
the bad news to her?
58
00:02:02,689 --> 00:02:04,034
Not it! Not it!
59
00:02:07,896 --> 00:02:15,000
♪ Life'’s changing around me,
and i'’m gonna make it mine ♪
60
00:02:15,068 --> 00:02:20,758
♪ i'’m reaching out and
living by my rules... ♪
61
00:02:20,827 --> 00:02:24,310
♪ Time'’s moving way too fast ♪
62
00:02:24,379 --> 00:02:28,000
♪ I wanna make it last...
63
00:02:30,620 --> 00:02:34,000
♪ '’cause i'’m out
on my own now ♪
64
00:02:34,068 --> 00:02:37,758
♪ and I like the way it feels.
65
00:02:42,620 --> 00:02:44,965
I can'’t wait to spend
your birthday with you.
66
00:02:45,034 --> 00:02:47,172
I'’m giving you your
first present early.
67
00:02:47,241 --> 00:02:49,172
Ooh, and you saved on gift wrap.
68
00:02:49,241 --> 00:02:50,172
I should get going.
69
00:02:50,241 --> 00:02:51,838
The people at work
think I just stepped away
70
00:02:51,862 --> 00:02:52,724
to go to the bathroom.
71
00:02:52,793 --> 00:02:53,689
I'’ll see you tomorrow.
72
00:02:53,758 --> 00:02:55,586
Looking forward to it.
73
00:02:55,655 --> 00:02:56,724
He can'’t come.
74
00:02:57,896 --> 00:02:59,344
Instead, you have
to bring Harvey
75
00:02:59,413 --> 00:03:00,448
to your birthday dinner
76
00:03:00,517 --> 00:03:01,793
and instead of eating dinner
77
00:03:01,862 --> 00:03:03,103
Harvey will be put on trial.
78
00:03:03,172 --> 00:03:04,034
No biggie.
79
00:03:04,103 --> 00:03:05,000
Big biggie!
80
00:03:05,068 --> 00:03:07,655
Followed by a humongous "huh?"
81
00:03:07,724 --> 00:03:08,793
Your great aunt Irma...
82
00:03:08,862 --> 00:03:10,793
And by "great" I mean
horrendously evil...
83
00:03:10,862 --> 00:03:13,310
Found out that you told
Harvey that you'’re a witch.
84
00:03:13,379 --> 00:03:15,551
Technically, I didn'’t
tell Harvey I was a witch.
85
00:03:15,620 --> 00:03:16,758
He found out on his own.
86
00:03:16,827 --> 00:03:18,379
Aunt Irma'’s not
one for subtleties.
87
00:03:18,448 --> 00:03:19,448
She'’s coming tomorrow
88
00:03:19,482 --> 00:03:21,000
and we'’re all in
deep donkey dung
89
00:03:21,068 --> 00:03:23,275
if she doesn'’t think
Harvey can keep the secret.
90
00:03:23,344 --> 00:03:25,172
Come on, aunt
hilda. We'’re family.
91
00:03:25,241 --> 00:03:27,034
What'’s the worst
she would do to us?
92
00:03:27,103 --> 00:03:29,068
Ask her daughter Phyllis.
93
00:03:29,137 --> 00:03:32,103
She told a mortal
she'’s a witch and...
94
00:03:32,172 --> 00:03:34,586
She'’s been wearing
that tutu for 300 years.
95
00:03:34,655 --> 00:03:35,793
On second thought
96
00:03:35,862 --> 00:03:38,379
why would I want
to spend my birthday
97
00:03:38,448 --> 00:03:41,448
with the guy I care
most about in the world?
98
00:03:43,344 --> 00:03:46,241
Okay, guys, here'’s
the menu for tomorrow:
99
00:03:46,310 --> 00:03:47,724
Spaghetti, corn and bread.
100
00:03:47,793 --> 00:03:49,896
You have a special guest
coming from out of town
101
00:03:49,965 --> 00:03:51,413
and you'’re making
three starches?
102
00:03:51,482 --> 00:03:53,034
It'’s called comfort food.
103
00:03:53,103 --> 00:03:55,793
It'’s called the only food
she knows how to cook.
104
00:03:55,862 --> 00:03:57,275
Hey, it'’s a free dinner.
105
00:03:57,344 --> 00:03:58,931
It is free, isn'’t it?
106
00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:01,172
[ Phone rings]
107
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:02,000
Hello. Hey, Isaac.
108
00:04:02,068 --> 00:04:03,068
Okay, here'’s the plan:
109
00:04:03,103 --> 00:04:04,206
We'’re going to eat dinner
110
00:04:04,275 --> 00:04:06,517
and then we'’re going to
go down to the soup kitchen
111
00:04:06,586 --> 00:04:07,655
to volunteer and then...
112
00:04:07,724 --> 00:04:09,034
What can you bring for dinner?
113
00:04:09,103 --> 00:04:11,206
I guess we could
use some potatoes.
114
00:04:11,275 --> 00:04:13,689
All right, see you at 7:00.
115
00:04:13,758 --> 00:04:17,000
So, tell us about
your friend Isaac.
116
00:04:17,068 --> 00:04:18,793
Actually, he'’s my ex-boyfiend.
117
00:04:18,862 --> 00:04:21,620
And I Don'’t want to
make a big deal out of this
118
00:04:21,689 --> 00:04:23,000
but he'’s Isaac hanson.
119
00:04:23,068 --> 00:04:24,517
You know, of hanson?
120
00:04:24,586 --> 00:04:27,275
You mean, the
all-natural soda people?
121
00:04:27,344 --> 00:04:28,689
No, the rock group.
122
00:04:28,758 --> 00:04:29,793
But when I dated him
123
00:04:29,862 --> 00:04:31,782
he was a guy with a
secondhand guitar and hyundai.
124
00:04:31,827 --> 00:04:33,655
Oh, then he became famous
125
00:04:33,724 --> 00:04:37,241
realized he could do better
and dumped you. Whew!
126
00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:39,379
Once again, my
world makes sense.
127
00:04:39,448 --> 00:04:41,379
Wow, what are the
odds of a rock star
128
00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:43,517
spending an evening
with a guy like me?
129
00:04:43,586 --> 00:04:45,655
Maybe he could teach
me how to be cool.
130
00:04:45,724 --> 00:04:47,586
He'’s Isaac hanson,
not the Messiah.
131
00:04:47,655 --> 00:04:50,448
And fyi, he likes to be
treated like a regular guy.
132
00:04:50,517 --> 00:04:51,862
So no special attention.
133
00:04:51,931 --> 00:04:54,103
So I shouldn'’t offer
to butter his corn?
134
00:04:54,172 --> 00:04:56,793
[ Phone rings]
135
00:04:56,862 --> 00:04:58,172
Kinkle.
136
00:04:58,241 --> 00:05:00,121
It'’s Sabrina. We have a
problem. Are you alone?
137
00:05:00,172 --> 00:05:02,068
I can be.
138
00:05:02,137 --> 00:05:04,413
It'’s my gastroenterologist.
139
00:05:04,482 --> 00:05:06,758
You Don'’t want to hear this.
140
00:05:08,758 --> 00:05:09,862
What'’s up, Sabrina?
141
00:05:09,931 --> 00:05:11,965
My aunt Irma found out
that you know i'’m a witch.
142
00:05:12,034 --> 00:05:14,551
She wants to meet you tomorrow
and ask you a few questions.
143
00:05:14,620 --> 00:05:16,482
But tomorrow'’s roxie'’s dinner.
144
00:05:16,551 --> 00:05:19,517
I have plans to eat
spaghetti with Isaac hanson.
145
00:05:19,586 --> 00:05:20,758
Harvey, listen closely.
146
00:05:20,827 --> 00:05:22,586
When people disappoint aunt Irma
147
00:05:22,655 --> 00:05:24,103
she turns them into things.
148
00:05:24,172 --> 00:05:25,310
What kind of things?
149
00:05:25,379 --> 00:05:26,724
Well, you know big Ben?
150
00:05:26,793 --> 00:05:28,241
He wasn'’t always a clock.
151
00:05:28,310 --> 00:05:29,689
See you tomorrow.
152
00:05:29,758 --> 00:05:31,700
What do you mean we can'’t
see each other on your birthday?
153
00:05:31,724 --> 00:05:34,344
The truth is my birthday
dinner is usually just family.
154
00:05:34,413 --> 00:05:35,620
It'’s kind of a tradition.
155
00:05:35,689 --> 00:05:37,448
Then things got
really complicated
156
00:05:37,517 --> 00:05:39,793
when my aunt Irma
announced she was coming.
157
00:05:39,862 --> 00:05:42,620
She'’s bitter, cranky
and just a little [ Whistles].
158
00:05:42,689 --> 00:05:44,103
I'’m really sorry, Josh.
159
00:05:44,172 --> 00:05:46,206
It'’s okay, we'’ve got
a few nuts hanging
160
00:05:46,275 --> 00:05:47,379
from our family tree.
161
00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:49,103
Besides, in a good relationship
162
00:05:49,172 --> 00:05:51,448
you can'’t let one evening
come between you.
163
00:05:52,793 --> 00:05:54,793
You'’re standing me
up for tomorrow night?!
164
00:05:54,862 --> 00:05:55,517
We'’re through!
165
00:05:55,586 --> 00:05:56,793
My hands are tied.
166
00:05:56,862 --> 00:05:59,275
The whole kinkle
clan decided to have
167
00:05:59,344 --> 00:06:02,137
a last-minute family
reunion at the farm.
168
00:06:02,206 --> 00:06:05,448
Farm? And what exactly
do the kinkles grow
169
00:06:05,517 --> 00:06:06,965
on the kinkle farm?
170
00:06:07,034 --> 00:06:08,689
Um, minks?
171
00:06:08,758 --> 00:06:12,551
Minks? You really
expect me to...?
172
00:06:12,620 --> 00:06:13,793
Oh, Harvey!
173
00:06:13,862 --> 00:06:18,034
I want it full length
with a really high collar!
174
00:06:19,689 --> 00:06:20,689
[ Sighs]
175
00:06:20,724 --> 00:06:24,655
That completes aunt
Irma'’s demented demands.
176
00:06:24,724 --> 00:06:28,344
The house is totally
sterile... like her.
177
00:06:28,413 --> 00:06:29,551
Uh-oh.
178
00:06:29,620 --> 00:06:31,827
That'’s either aunt Irma
179
00:06:31,896 --> 00:06:34,172
or a big wind
chasing Helen hunt.
180
00:06:34,241 --> 00:06:35,241
Okay, remember
181
00:06:35,275 --> 00:06:37,275
stick together and be strong.
182
00:06:37,344 --> 00:06:39,034
Don'’t give her an inch.
183
00:06:39,103 --> 00:06:42,241
She'’ll be lucky if she
gets a hello out of me.
184
00:06:44,758 --> 00:06:46,689
Huzzah, milady!
185
00:06:46,758 --> 00:06:49,275
I am your humble servant.
186
00:06:49,344 --> 00:06:52,068
Silence, you talking throw rug.
187
00:06:52,137 --> 00:06:52,827
¿Que?
188
00:06:52,896 --> 00:06:55,931
Oh, you have a sandpaper tongue.
189
00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:59,551
I have corns on my
feet. Do the math.
190
00:06:59,620 --> 00:07:01,862
A couple things you need
to know about my aunt Irma.
191
00:07:01,931 --> 00:07:03,551
Don'’t look her in the eye
192
00:07:03,620 --> 00:07:05,931
never start a
sentence with "Anyhoo"
193
00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:08,655
and she can smell
fear, so stay downwind.
194
00:07:08,724 --> 00:07:10,389
Would you care for some
hot cocoa, aunt Irma?
195
00:07:10,413 --> 00:07:11,206
You drink it.
196
00:07:11,275 --> 00:07:12,896
You'’re nothing
but skin and bones.
197
00:07:12,965 --> 00:07:15,000
Thank you.
198
00:07:15,068 --> 00:07:17,620
And hilda, I notice your
ring finger is still bare.
199
00:07:17,689 --> 00:07:20,655
So it is.
200
00:07:20,724 --> 00:07:24,172
There'’s another
finger i'’d like her to see.
201
00:07:24,241 --> 00:07:25,896
Hello, everybody. We'’re here.
202
00:07:25,965 --> 00:07:27,551
Nice to meet you, aunt Irma.
203
00:07:27,620 --> 00:07:29,275
I'’ll be the judge of that.
204
00:07:29,344 --> 00:07:30,965
Don'’t let us down, Harvey.
205
00:07:31,034 --> 00:07:33,931
Our entire lives depend on you.
206
00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:35,068
No pressure there.
207
00:07:35,137 --> 00:07:36,068
You'’ll do fine.
208
00:07:36,137 --> 00:07:37,068
Hello, aunt Irma.
209
00:07:37,137 --> 00:07:39,034
How nice of you to
come for my birthday.
210
00:07:39,103 --> 00:07:40,517
Silence!
211
00:07:40,586 --> 00:07:43,310
So this is the infamously
trustworthy mortal.
212
00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:45,448
We'’re going to find out
213
00:07:45,517 --> 00:07:48,482
if you can take a secret
to the grave, Harvey kinkle.
214
00:07:48,551 --> 00:07:49,862
[ Cackles]
215
00:07:49,931 --> 00:07:51,206
[ Thunder booms]
216
00:07:51,275 --> 00:07:52,379
Should I bow?
217
00:07:52,448 --> 00:07:53,896
It wouldn'’t hurt.
218
00:07:55,965 --> 00:07:58,482
Wow, hanson'’s web page
gets a million hits a day.
219
00:07:58,551 --> 00:08:00,655
The only hits I get on
my web page are me
220
00:08:00,724 --> 00:08:03,344
checking to see if I got
any hits on my web page.
221
00:08:03,413 --> 00:08:05,103
Why Don'’t you log
into their chat room
222
00:08:05,172 --> 00:08:07,412
and find out why Isaac'’s a
half-an- hour late for dinner.
223
00:08:07,448 --> 00:08:08,655
[ Doorbell rings]
224
00:08:08,724 --> 00:08:10,827
He'’s here! He'’s
here! I'’ll get it!
225
00:08:10,896 --> 00:08:12,689
I am such a huge fan of...
226
00:08:12,758 --> 00:08:14,068
Not you.
227
00:08:14,137 --> 00:08:15,862
And a lovely
evening to you, too.
228
00:08:15,931 --> 00:08:17,517
Can you tell Sabrina i'’m here?
229
00:08:17,586 --> 00:08:19,551
She already went
to her aunt'’s house.
230
00:08:19,620 --> 00:08:22,034
Oh, bummer. I thought I
could catch her before she left.
231
00:08:22,103 --> 00:08:25,241
I really wanted her to get
her present on her birthday.
232
00:08:25,310 --> 00:08:29,793
I hear leather and 20% off.
233
00:08:29,862 --> 00:08:31,068
It was 15.
234
00:08:31,137 --> 00:08:34,344
I'’ll just drop it by
her aunt'’s house.
235
00:08:36,793 --> 00:08:39,448
Is your name Harvey kinkle?
236
00:08:39,517 --> 00:08:40,586
Yes.
237
00:08:40,655 --> 00:08:42,413
Well done. Let'’s eat.
238
00:08:42,482 --> 00:08:44,103
Silence!
239
00:08:44,172 --> 00:08:46,241
I'’m not through.
240
00:08:46,310 --> 00:08:48,931
Can you be trusted to
keep the spellman secret?
241
00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:49,931
Absolutely.
242
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:50,931
You'’re lying.
243
00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:52,827
Aunt Irma, I Don'’t mean
244
00:08:52,896 --> 00:08:54,586
to question your
interrogation skills
245
00:08:54,655 --> 00:08:56,448
but your lie detector
isn'’t plugged in.
246
00:08:56,517 --> 00:08:58,551
You'’re lying.
247
00:08:58,620 --> 00:09:01,103
Okay, you'’re not lying,
but you'’re insolent.
248
00:09:01,172 --> 00:09:03,310
I never trusted these
machines, anyway.
249
00:09:04,448 --> 00:09:05,620
Let'’s move on
250
00:09:05,689 --> 00:09:07,862
to a more accurate
method of truth detection...
251
00:09:07,931 --> 00:09:09,068
Hot coals.
252
00:09:09,137 --> 00:09:12,896
Somebody fetch
me a frosty drink.
253
00:09:13,620 --> 00:09:14,758
Hot coals?
254
00:09:14,827 --> 00:09:16,148
Don'’t worry, i'’m
sure she'’ll cool down
255
00:09:16,172 --> 00:09:17,251
when she'’s had a cold beverage.
256
00:09:17,275 --> 00:09:19,655
Okay, we'’re going to be fine.
257
00:09:19,724 --> 00:09:21,586
What planet are you on?
258
00:09:21,655 --> 00:09:23,827
We'’re out of frosty drinks!
259
00:09:23,896 --> 00:09:26,137
You can'’t let aunt
Irma rattle you.
260
00:09:26,206 --> 00:09:29,586
Sabrina, the woman
wants to grill me... literally.
261
00:09:29,655 --> 00:09:31,931
It'’s healthier than
being deep fried.
262
00:09:32,931 --> 00:09:34,034
Hug!
263
00:09:41,068 --> 00:09:43,068
Family tradition, huh?
264
00:09:43,137 --> 00:09:45,413
That must be aunt Harvey.
265
00:09:48,965 --> 00:09:51,482
What'’s with you guys? You
haven'’t touched any of your food.
266
00:09:51,551 --> 00:09:53,965
I'’m waiting out of
respect for Mr. Hanson.
267
00:09:54,034 --> 00:09:56,034
And I just hate your cooking.
268
00:09:56,103 --> 00:09:57,724
[ Phone rings]Hello?
269
00:09:57,793 --> 00:10:00,310
I understand.
270
00:10:00,379 --> 00:10:02,793
Thanks for calling.
271
00:10:02,862 --> 00:10:04,241
Isaac'’s assistant.
272
00:10:04,310 --> 00:10:06,655
Doesn'’t look like he'’s
going to make it after all.
273
00:10:06,724 --> 00:10:07,976
I can'’t believe
he'’d stand you up
274
00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,286
after all the
trouble you went to.
275
00:10:09,310 --> 00:10:11,379
These rock stars
are so insensitive!
276
00:10:11,448 --> 00:10:13,241
How could Isaac do this?
277
00:10:13,310 --> 00:10:14,310
I'’m okay with it.
278
00:10:14,344 --> 00:10:17,206
I mean to me! My
evening is ruined!
279
00:10:17,275 --> 00:10:18,424
Well, mine'’s not going to be.
280
00:10:18,448 --> 00:10:19,631
I'’m going to the soup kitchen.
281
00:10:19,655 --> 00:10:20,655
I'’ll go with you.
282
00:10:20,689 --> 00:10:22,310
Morgan, you want
to help the needy?
283
00:10:22,379 --> 00:10:24,827
Yes, I do.
284
00:10:24,896 --> 00:10:27,758
And i'’m going to start
with a bubble bath.
285
00:10:27,827 --> 00:10:30,689
You know, I
almost hate to say it
286
00:10:30,758 --> 00:10:32,551
but he smells delicious.
287
00:10:32,620 --> 00:10:34,241
Sabrina: Harvey, how you doing?
288
00:10:34,310 --> 00:10:37,862
I'’m all right. It'’s
not as hot as it looks.
289
00:10:37,931 --> 00:10:39,862
Yet.
290
00:10:39,931 --> 00:10:41,793
All right, kinkle, let'’s
get this over with.
291
00:10:41,862 --> 00:10:43,172
You'’re in a dark alley
292
00:10:43,241 --> 00:10:45,275
a hoodlum throws
you against the wall.
293
00:10:45,344 --> 00:10:47,758
He asks, "are the
spellmans witches?"
294
00:10:47,827 --> 00:10:49,103
What do you say?
295
00:10:49,172 --> 00:10:50,275
He says, "no!"
296
00:10:50,344 --> 00:10:51,655
Only the mortal speaks.
297
00:10:51,724 --> 00:10:53,000
I say no.
298
00:10:53,068 --> 00:10:55,689
Copycat. The boy
has no mind of his own.
299
00:10:55,758 --> 00:10:57,896
Although he cooks quite evenly.
300
00:10:57,965 --> 00:10:59,862
They say slow cooking
seals in the juices.
301
00:10:59,931 --> 00:11:02,655
What am I saying?
302
00:11:02,724 --> 00:11:05,517
Aunt erma, it'’s just not
fair to question Harvey
303
00:11:05,586 --> 00:11:07,172
while he'’s roasting at 475.
304
00:11:07,241 --> 00:11:09,896
Oh, keep talking,
darling. I'’ll make it 500.
305
00:11:09,965 --> 00:11:12,275
May god forgive me, but
i'’m going to set the table.
306
00:11:12,344 --> 00:11:13,620
Hilda!
307
00:11:13,689 --> 00:11:16,137
I'’m sorry. I Don'’t
know what i'’m saying.
308
00:11:16,206 --> 00:11:19,034
Aunt erma always turns
me into a basket case.
309
00:11:19,103 --> 00:11:20,827
Oh, thanks for reminding me.
310
00:11:22,275 --> 00:11:25,448
Help! I'’m dried fruit!
311
00:11:27,965 --> 00:11:31,931
Ooh, Sabrina'’s cousin
sent her a cashmere sweater.
312
00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:33,413
No, wait.
313
00:11:33,482 --> 00:11:34,931
Merino wool.
314
00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:36,413
[ Doorbell rings]
315
00:11:36,482 --> 00:11:39,896
Please be Isaac hanson.
316
00:11:39,965 --> 00:11:41,896
Didn'’t we just do this?
317
00:11:41,965 --> 00:11:44,000
Oh, you'’re going to love this.
318
00:11:44,068 --> 00:11:45,620
I just stopped by the spellmans
319
00:11:45,689 --> 00:11:47,275
where I saw Sabrina
320
00:11:47,344 --> 00:11:49,172
with her arms around Harvey.
321
00:11:49,241 --> 00:11:53,137
No! Harvey'’s supposed to
be hand-selecting my mink!
322
00:11:53,206 --> 00:11:56,000
Yeah, well, Harvey'’s pulling
the mink over your eyes.
323
00:11:56,068 --> 00:11:58,275
Obviously, those two
are secretly dating.
324
00:11:58,344 --> 00:12:01,344
Then we should secretly
date to get back at them.
325
00:12:01,413 --> 00:12:02,724
Oh, yeah, that'’s the answer.
326
00:12:02,793 --> 00:12:04,758
Where'’s miles and roxie?
327
00:12:04,827 --> 00:12:08,000
They went to that soup kitchen
she'’s always yapping about.
328
00:12:08,068 --> 00:12:10,241
Hey, you know what?
That'’s not such a bad idea.
329
00:12:10,310 --> 00:12:11,931
You and I have
better things to do
330
00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:14,310
than sit around here
feeling sorry for ourselves.
331
00:12:14,379 --> 00:12:15,517
You'’re right.
332
00:12:15,586 --> 00:12:17,310
Have a nice time
at the soup kitchen.
333
00:12:17,379 --> 00:12:19,793
I am going to drown my
sorrows a different way.
334
00:12:23,137 --> 00:12:26,137
Oh, this one'’s a return
waiting to happen.
335
00:12:28,068 --> 00:12:31,000
Twice you'’ve been interrogated
and twice you'’ve failed
336
00:12:31,068 --> 00:12:35,310
yet, if you can answer this
one simple question honestly
337
00:12:35,379 --> 00:12:37,310
this crucible will be over.
338
00:12:37,379 --> 00:12:43,310
Kinkle, in your opinion,
am I an attractive woman?
339
00:12:45,310 --> 00:12:47,103
If he says yes, she'’ll
never believe him.
340
00:12:47,172 --> 00:12:49,413
If he says no, she'’ll
turn him into a dust ruffle.
341
00:12:49,482 --> 00:12:52,034
You have no idea how much
i'’d like to be a fig right now.
342
00:12:52,103 --> 00:12:56,275
Wonder if should
have my tail enlarged?
343
00:12:56,344 --> 00:12:58,793
Well, kinkle...
344
00:12:58,862 --> 00:13:01,931
Am I an attractive woman?
345
00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:05,896
Well, on the outside,
you'’re nice-looking.
346
00:13:05,965 --> 00:13:06,689
Good, Harvey!
347
00:13:06,758 --> 00:13:07,655
But...
348
00:13:07,724 --> 00:13:08,586
No buts! No buts!
349
00:13:08,655 --> 00:13:10,206
On the inside...
350
00:13:10,275 --> 00:13:12,206
Honestly, you'’re hideous.
351
00:13:13,310 --> 00:13:15,103
Bad, Harvey! Very, very bad!
352
00:13:15,172 --> 00:13:16,862
Oh, no, here it comes.
353
00:13:16,931 --> 00:13:19,241
Hilda, it'’s been nice knowing
you in your present form.
354
00:13:19,310 --> 00:13:20,586
Likewise.
355
00:13:20,655 --> 00:13:22,965
Maybe we'’ll get lucky and
end up a washer-dryer combo.
356
00:13:23,034 --> 00:13:24,379
I'’ll be the bleach.
357
00:13:24,448 --> 00:13:25,827
You'’re right, kinkle.
358
00:13:25,896 --> 00:13:27,724
I am hideous on the inside.
359
00:13:27,793 --> 00:13:29,689
So hideous that i'’ve
baked you, stretched you
360
00:13:29,758 --> 00:13:31,379
and put you on a rotisserie.
361
00:13:31,448 --> 00:13:32,689
So evil...
362
00:13:32,758 --> 00:13:34,931
That if I were to let
you go out into the world
363
00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:37,551
you would tell everyone that
the spellmans are witches.
364
00:13:37,620 --> 00:13:39,206
No, I wouldn'’t!
365
00:13:39,275 --> 00:13:41,310
I'’d never do anything
that would hurt Sabrina.
366
00:13:42,620 --> 00:13:43,448
Good answer.
367
00:13:43,517 --> 00:13:44,862
Really good answer.
368
00:13:46,689 --> 00:13:48,827
I'’m convinced our
secret is safe with you.
369
00:13:48,896 --> 00:13:50,689
You may return
to your mortal life.
370
00:13:50,758 --> 00:13:52,448
You'’re free![ Squeals]
371
00:13:52,517 --> 00:13:53,827
Not by a long shot.
372
00:13:53,896 --> 00:13:55,482
I promised Morgan a mink.
373
00:13:55,551 --> 00:13:56,827
Oh, maybe I can help out.
374
00:13:56,896 --> 00:13:59,103
It'’s a mink substitute
375
00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:00,793
but she'’ll never
know the difference.
376
00:14:00,862 --> 00:14:02,758
You do beautiful work.
377
00:14:02,827 --> 00:14:04,551
I love the lining.
378
00:14:04,620 --> 00:14:06,103
Well, i'’ve got to call Josh
379
00:14:06,172 --> 00:14:08,482
and salvage whatever'’s
left of my birthday.
380
00:14:08,551 --> 00:14:10,620
Not that this wasn'’t
absolutely lovely.
381
00:14:14,344 --> 00:14:18,206
See? Now this is what life'’s
really about... helping others.
382
00:14:18,275 --> 00:14:20,344
It'’s not about material
belongings or anything...
383
00:14:20,413 --> 00:14:21,310
[ Phone rings]
384
00:14:21,379 --> 00:14:22,379
Yello?
385
00:14:22,413 --> 00:14:23,275
Hey, Josh.
386
00:14:23,344 --> 00:14:24,896
You'’re dead to me, Sabrina.
387
00:14:26,103 --> 00:14:28,137
Bun?
388
00:14:28,206 --> 00:14:29,310
I'’ll pass.
389
00:14:29,379 --> 00:14:31,620
[ Phone rings]
390
00:14:31,689 --> 00:14:33,517
Dead to you?! What'’s going on?
391
00:14:33,586 --> 00:14:36,000
I stopped by your aunt'’s
house with your birthday present.
392
00:14:36,068 --> 00:14:37,344
I saw you and Harvey hugging.
393
00:14:37,413 --> 00:14:39,793
Oh, no. I can
explain everything.
394
00:14:39,862 --> 00:14:42,655
Don'’t bother. I'’m busy
helping those in need.
395
00:14:42,724 --> 00:14:46,172
Hey, buddy, what, my buns
aren'’t good enough for you?
396
00:14:47,689 --> 00:14:48,931
[ Doorbell rings]
397
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:51,620
That boy doesn'’t know
if he'’s coming or going.
398
00:14:51,689 --> 00:14:53,172
Come in, Josh!
399
00:14:53,241 --> 00:14:55,103
Hello?
400
00:14:55,172 --> 00:14:58,103
[ Screaming and laughing]
401
00:14:58,172 --> 00:14:59,379
That never gets old. Hey.
402
00:14:59,448 --> 00:15:00,517
I'’m Morgan.
403
00:15:00,586 --> 00:15:02,000
I'’m Isaac. I hope
you Don'’t mind.
404
00:15:02,068 --> 00:15:03,137
I brought a meat dish.
405
00:15:03,206 --> 00:15:05,068
Honey, you are the meat dish.
406
00:15:05,137 --> 00:15:07,172
I said that out loud, didn'’t I?
407
00:15:07,241 --> 00:15:08,068
Where'’s roxie?
408
00:15:08,137 --> 00:15:09,586
A-A-At some soup place.
409
00:15:09,655 --> 00:15:13,103
She didn'’t feel like waiting
around for you, but I did.
410
00:15:13,172 --> 00:15:14,286
I Don'’t want roxie to be mad.
411
00:15:14,310 --> 00:15:16,010
Let'’s jump in the limo
and head down there.
412
00:15:16,034 --> 00:15:17,931
If you think that I
am the kind of girl
413
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,103
that would jump into
a limo with a stranger
414
00:15:20,172 --> 00:15:21,275
you are so right!
415
00:15:23,931 --> 00:15:26,137
So, if you think about
it, we'’re all just bacteria
416
00:15:26,206 --> 00:15:28,655
under the fingernail of the
colossal ambivalent man-god
417
00:15:28,724 --> 00:15:31,793
whom I privately refer to
as Jasper the magnificent.
418
00:15:31,862 --> 00:15:34,517
Dude, you just made
me realize something...
419
00:15:34,586 --> 00:15:37,448
If a guy like you is
functioning in society
420
00:15:37,517 --> 00:15:39,413
then I gave up way too soon.
421
00:15:41,793 --> 00:15:43,379
Josh...
422
00:15:43,448 --> 00:15:44,689
I'’m listening.
423
00:15:44,758 --> 00:15:47,137
There'’s nothing going on
between me and Harvey.
424
00:15:47,206 --> 00:15:48,310
You were hugging him.
425
00:15:48,379 --> 00:15:49,482
It'’s my birthday!
426
00:15:49,551 --> 00:15:52,344
A lot of people are
giving me birthday hugs.
427
00:15:52,413 --> 00:15:53,896
Okay, okay, hug'’s over.
428
00:15:53,965 --> 00:15:55,551
Sabrina, why would you lie to me
429
00:15:55,620 --> 00:15:58,413
about a family birthday and
then spend it with Harvey?
430
00:15:58,482 --> 00:15:59,965
It was out of my control.
431
00:16:00,034 --> 00:16:01,758
So what are you
saying, he just showed up
432
00:16:01,827 --> 00:16:03,655
and you were obligated
to hang all over him?
433
00:16:03,724 --> 00:16:05,068
Josh, you'’ve got
to believe me...
434
00:16:05,137 --> 00:16:07,206
This whole evening
has been torture, literally.
435
00:16:07,275 --> 00:16:09,379
The only person I want
to hang all over is you.
436
00:16:09,448 --> 00:16:10,620
How can I believe you?
437
00:16:12,413 --> 00:16:13,620
That makes it a little easier.
438
00:16:13,689 --> 00:16:14,734
My birthday'’s not over yet.
439
00:16:14,758 --> 00:16:15,976
Let'’s go back to
my aunt'’s house
440
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,079
and we'’ll celebrate together
441
00:16:17,103 --> 00:16:18,769
like we should'’ve
done in the first place.
442
00:16:18,793 --> 00:16:20,103
That would be great.
443
00:16:20,172 --> 00:16:21,596
And I could open
the gift you got me.
444
00:16:21,620 --> 00:16:23,862
Ooh, I think you'’re
really going to like it.
445
00:16:23,931 --> 00:16:25,965
And Don'’t believe
what Morgan tells you.
446
00:16:26,034 --> 00:16:27,931
It was only 15% off.
447
00:16:30,068 --> 00:16:32,793
Aunt hilda! Aunt Zelda!
448
00:16:32,862 --> 00:16:36,241
Uh, Sabrina, you'’ve got
three little pigs in your house.
449
00:16:36,310 --> 00:16:39,034
And I bet I know who
the big bad wolf is.
450
00:16:39,103 --> 00:16:42,068
Zelda: Sabrina, thank
goodness you'’re here.
451
00:16:42,137 --> 00:16:43,068
What happened?
452
00:16:43,137 --> 00:16:44,586
When I left,
everything was kosher.
453
00:16:44,655 --> 00:16:45,931
Now you'’re pork!
454
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:47,827
Just as aunt Irma
was about to leave
455
00:16:47,896 --> 00:16:50,827
somebody called
her "prune face."
456
00:16:50,896 --> 00:16:52,793
Hilda: What? I
adore dried fruit.
457
00:16:52,862 --> 00:16:55,206
And, having beendried fruit,
I feel qualified to say that.
458
00:16:55,275 --> 00:16:57,310
Salem: Hey, who'’s
up for makin'’ bacon?
459
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:01,482
Come on, people! Nobody'’s
eating the spaghetti!
460
00:17:01,551 --> 00:17:02,965
I made it myself!
461
00:17:04,137 --> 00:17:05,206
[ Thuds]
462
00:17:05,275 --> 00:17:07,241
I think it needs salt.
463
00:17:07,310 --> 00:17:09,379
Oh, you poor kids.
464
00:17:09,448 --> 00:17:10,655
Come in and have some soup.
465
00:17:10,724 --> 00:17:11,724
Oh, thanks
466
00:17:11,758 --> 00:17:13,862
but we have these great
little quiches in the limo.
467
00:17:13,931 --> 00:17:19,551
Everybody, this is Isaac
hanson from hanson.
468
00:17:19,620 --> 00:17:22,620
Yeah, and i'’m Steve
snapple from snapple.
469
00:17:22,689 --> 00:17:23,931
Yo, rox!
470
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,034
Isaac! Hey.
471
00:17:25,103 --> 00:17:26,827
I'’m so glad you
finally made it.
472
00:17:26,896 --> 00:17:29,344
I'’ve got the next 24
hours planned out for us.
473
00:17:29,413 --> 00:17:31,724
Roxie, you'’re going to
hate me when I tell you this
474
00:17:31,793 --> 00:17:33,655
but I can'’t stay... The
plans have changed.
475
00:17:33,724 --> 00:17:35,586
I can only be here
for a couple of hours.
476
00:17:35,655 --> 00:17:37,655
Let me guess: You and
the boys are jetting to Paris
477
00:17:37,689 --> 00:17:38,803
to go clubbing with Madonna?
478
00:17:38,827 --> 00:17:40,379
Actually, no.
We'’re flying to Ohio
479
00:17:40,448 --> 00:17:42,137
to sing for some
kids at a hospital.
480
00:17:42,206 --> 00:17:44,586
Ah. I did not know that.
481
00:17:44,655 --> 00:17:45,655
But i'’m really sorry.
482
00:17:45,689 --> 00:17:47,562
Is there anything I can
do to make it up to you?
483
00:17:47,586 --> 00:17:48,793
I can think of something.
484
00:17:48,862 --> 00:17:52,620
Listen and listen
good... Hanson.
485
00:17:52,689 --> 00:17:53,931
You may be tops in pop
486
00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:56,413
but I Don'’t like you
dissing my friend roxie
487
00:17:56,482 --> 00:17:58,586
or your implied diss
with regard to me.
488
00:17:58,655 --> 00:18:01,379
We'’re through, capiche?
489
00:18:03,827 --> 00:18:05,655
Never seen him
before in my life.
490
00:18:06,724 --> 00:18:08,310
Aunt Irma, I need
to talk to you.
491
00:18:08,379 --> 00:18:10,034
I know you'’re out
there somewhere!
492
00:18:10,103 --> 00:18:11,724
What is it now?
493
00:18:11,793 --> 00:18:14,896
I was right in the middle of
barbecuing my brother-in-law.
494
00:18:14,965 --> 00:18:17,310
Look, I Don'’t care if
aunt hilda called you
495
00:18:17,379 --> 00:18:18,896
her pet name for dried plums
496
00:18:18,965 --> 00:18:20,206
you had no right to turn her
497
00:18:20,275 --> 00:18:22,000
or anyone else into
barnyard animals.
498
00:18:22,068 --> 00:18:23,172
I beg your pardon.
499
00:18:23,241 --> 00:18:25,517
Do you know to
whom you'’re speaking?
500
00:18:25,586 --> 00:18:26,827
Silence! It'’s my turn now
501
00:18:26,896 --> 00:18:28,448
and I want to set
the record straight.
502
00:18:28,517 --> 00:18:31,275
These two little piggies have
done a fantastic job in raising me.
503
00:18:31,344 --> 00:18:34,034
And the third little piggy,
well... we'’ll get back to him later.
504
00:18:34,103 --> 00:18:36,517
The point is, they Don'’t
deserve your stupid punishment.
505
00:18:36,586 --> 00:18:39,724
If it makes you happy taking your
anger out on somebody, take it out on me.
506
00:18:41,482 --> 00:18:43,862
My, my, my, my, my, my, my.
507
00:18:43,931 --> 00:18:47,413
What a brazen little
witch you turned out to be.
508
00:18:47,482 --> 00:18:49,896
You'’re the first person
who'’s ever stood up to me.
509
00:18:49,965 --> 00:18:51,405
Could you just give
me a general idea
510
00:18:51,448 --> 00:18:52,665
of what'’s going to happen here?
511
00:18:52,689 --> 00:18:54,689
Certainly. With
an attitude like that
512
00:18:54,758 --> 00:18:58,379
you may wind up being the next
matriarch of the spellman dynasty.
513
00:18:58,448 --> 00:19:00,000
Say what now?
514
00:19:00,068 --> 00:19:01,862
Sabrina, you'’re a
formidable young lady
515
00:19:01,931 --> 00:19:03,172
and you'’ve earned my respect.
516
00:19:03,241 --> 00:19:06,034
I will now take my leave...
517
00:19:06,103 --> 00:19:08,551
Right after you give your
auntie a great big hug.
518
00:19:08,620 --> 00:19:11,034
Enough.
519
00:19:11,103 --> 00:19:13,137
Happy birthday and good-bye.
520
00:19:13,206 --> 00:19:15,000
Wait! What about
the little piggies?
521
00:19:15,068 --> 00:19:17,172
Oh, they'’re so
much cuter this way.
522
00:19:18,310 --> 00:19:19,620
Oh, very well.
523
00:19:20,931 --> 00:19:23,172
Sabrina, that was incredible!
524
00:19:23,241 --> 00:19:25,965
An extraordinary display
of courage and principle.
525
00:19:26,034 --> 00:19:27,965
I taught you that.
526
00:19:28,034 --> 00:19:29,354
I'’d love to accept
your accolades
527
00:19:29,413 --> 00:19:30,862
but i'’ve got a
birthday to celebrate
528
00:19:30,931 --> 00:19:32,172
and a boyfriend to thaw.
529
00:19:35,724 --> 00:19:37,310
Oh, Sabrina, there you are.
530
00:19:37,379 --> 00:19:40,068
Hey, what happened
to the three little pigs?
531
00:19:40,137 --> 00:19:41,758
Oh, they lived
happily every after.
532
00:19:41,827 --> 00:19:44,206
You know, someone still
hasn'’t given me my birthday hug.
533
00:19:45,586 --> 00:19:47,965
You'’re next, Josh.
534
00:19:52,827 --> 00:19:54,482
Sabrina, what would
you like for dessert?
535
00:19:54,551 --> 00:19:56,137
We'’ve got birthday
cake and ice cream.
536
00:19:56,206 --> 00:19:58,034
And gingerbread
cookies and cobbler...
537
00:19:58,103 --> 00:19:59,623
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
I am way too stuffed.
538
00:19:59,655 --> 00:20:01,255
Hey, you know what
would be a great idea?
539
00:20:01,310 --> 00:20:03,310
We take all those desserts
down to the soup kitchen
540
00:20:03,379 --> 00:20:04,819
and share them
with the people there.
541
00:20:05,827 --> 00:20:07,724
Sexy and socially aware.
542
00:20:07,793 --> 00:20:09,655
Can I pick them or what?
543
00:20:09,724 --> 00:20:12,896
[ Pop intro playing]
544
00:20:21,482 --> 00:20:27,758
♪ I said, hey, i'’m
makin'’ my movie, baby ♪
545
00:20:27,827 --> 00:20:30,344
♪ you keep fakin'’ on my ♪
546
00:20:30,413 --> 00:20:33,241
♪ you keep breakin'’ on my ♪
547
00:20:33,310 --> 00:20:36,206
♪ hey...
548
00:20:36,275 --> 00:20:40,241
♪ You want that fine
white wine, Mai Tai ♪
549
00:20:40,310 --> 00:20:43,586
♪ what you want from me?
550
00:20:43,655 --> 00:20:45,724
♪ '’cause you'’re on my mind ♪
551
00:20:45,793 --> 00:20:49,275
♪ Don'’t you care no more ♪
552
00:20:49,344 --> 00:20:52,137
♪ that you'’re
losing yourself? ♪
553
00:20:52,206 --> 00:20:54,448
♪ Don'’t you want some truth? ♪
554
00:20:54,517 --> 00:20:57,103
♪ '’cause i'’ll give you mine ♪
555
00:20:57,172 --> 00:21:03,034
♪ hey, when i'’m
makin'’ my movie, baby ♪
556
00:21:03,103 --> 00:21:06,655
♪ you keep sayin'’
all my lines ♪
557
00:21:08,793 --> 00:21:14,103
♪ hey, after sunset
drive cruisin'’, baby ♪
558
00:21:14,172 --> 00:21:17,413
♪ you'’re just
yesterday'’s price ♪
559
00:21:19,413 --> 00:21:21,896
♪ mmm, hey!
40764
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