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00:00:02,413 --> 00:00:04,517
Tonight i'’ll host an
"eye on sorcery" special
2
00:00:04,586 --> 00:00:06,862
on the upcoming
witches'’ council elections.
3
00:00:06,931 --> 00:00:10,103
Richard Langston is my favorite
anchorman on the witch channel.
4
00:00:10,172 --> 00:00:11,655
I know, he'’s so trustworthy.
5
00:00:11,724 --> 00:00:15,068
This just in from the department
of health, education and magic:
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00:00:15,137 --> 00:00:16,689
And he'’s a
free-range anchorman.
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00:00:16,758 --> 00:00:18,413
There have been
confirmed reports
8
00:00:18,482 --> 00:00:19,758
of a finger flu epidemic.
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00:00:19,827 --> 00:00:21,172
The flu, which affects
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00:00:21,241 --> 00:00:23,655
your pointing finger,
can be contagious.
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00:00:23,724 --> 00:00:25,310
Bundle up those fingers.
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00:00:28,275 --> 00:00:30,275
Did you guys look
outside this morning?
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00:00:30,344 --> 00:00:32,241
It'’s so sunny, it'’s
almost like spring.
14
00:00:32,310 --> 00:00:33,344
And you'’re wearing
15
00:00:33,413 --> 00:00:34,758
a very nice spring outfit.
16
00:00:34,827 --> 00:00:36,068
Only thing missing is...
17
00:00:37,724 --> 00:00:39,206
Mittens?
18
00:00:39,275 --> 00:00:41,862
The last time I wore
mittens, everybody teased me.
19
00:00:41,931 --> 00:00:43,355
It almost ruined
kindergarten for me.
20
00:00:43,379 --> 00:00:44,758
There'’s a finger flu alert.
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00:00:44,827 --> 00:00:47,379
As a young witch, you'’re
highly susceptible to it.
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00:00:47,448 --> 00:00:49,551
Okay, I know you guys mean well
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00:00:49,620 --> 00:00:52,172
but what'’s worse than
wearing mittens in school?
24
00:00:54,620 --> 00:00:55,551
Okay.
25
00:00:55,620 --> 00:00:56,896
Point made.
26
00:01:16,068 --> 00:01:18,793
Sabrina, the Greek, not geek.
27
00:01:25,758 --> 00:01:27,379
Can I borrow your history book?
28
00:01:27,448 --> 00:01:28,517
I left mine at home.
29
00:01:28,586 --> 00:01:29,586
Sure.
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00:01:29,620 --> 00:01:31,000
What'’s with the mittens?
31
00:01:31,068 --> 00:01:32,103
Eczema?
32
00:01:32,172 --> 00:01:34,137
No. I promised my
aunts i'’d wear them,
33
00:01:34,206 --> 00:01:36,620
but there was no time
frame on that promise.
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00:01:38,448 --> 00:01:39,689
[ Valerie moaning]
35
00:01:39,758 --> 00:01:41,896
Why am I allowed to live?
36
00:01:41,965 --> 00:01:43,206
I think there are laws.
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00:01:43,275 --> 00:01:44,724
I put my idea for a town meeting
38
00:01:44,793 --> 00:01:46,103
on Mrs. Quick'’s desk.
39
00:01:46,172 --> 00:01:48,827
Oh, no, the person you want
to read it will actually read it?
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00:01:48,896 --> 00:01:51,482
So you see what an
awful situation it is.
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00:01:51,551 --> 00:01:52,965
Valerie, you'’re the only person
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00:01:53,034 --> 00:01:55,068
that has to work up
to low self-esteem.
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00:01:55,137 --> 00:01:57,379
I know. The other day
I saw this book called
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00:01:57,448 --> 00:01:58,586
how to be confident.
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00:01:58,655 --> 00:02:00,551
I almost bought
it, but I was afraid
46
00:02:00,620 --> 00:02:02,413
the cashier would
make fun of me.
47
00:02:02,482 --> 00:02:05,379
Oh, well, you know, actually,
I bought myself a copy.
48
00:02:05,448 --> 00:02:07,413
Here.
49
00:02:07,482 --> 00:02:08,689
You can borrow it.
50
00:02:08,758 --> 00:02:09,793
Thanks, Sabrina.
51
00:02:09,862 --> 00:02:10,931
Does it work?
52
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:13,448
Has the Oprah book
club been wrong yet?
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00:02:13,517 --> 00:02:15,137
Valerie, I read your...
54
00:02:15,206 --> 00:02:16,137
I'’m sorry.
55
00:02:16,206 --> 00:02:17,379
No. I think
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00:02:17,448 --> 00:02:19,448
your town meeting
idea is wonderful.
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00:02:19,517 --> 00:02:21,448
Really? You'’re
not just saying that?
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00:02:21,517 --> 00:02:24,034
No. Believe me, if I
didn'’t like your proposal,
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00:02:24,103 --> 00:02:25,689
i'’d be avoiding you right now.
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00:02:25,758 --> 00:02:27,965
I'’m afraid of confrontation.
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00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:32,551
Hey. I asked for
extra tater tots.
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00:02:32,620 --> 00:02:34,275
This is working already.
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00:02:38,758 --> 00:02:40,379
Oh, that'’s right.
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00:02:40,448 --> 00:02:42,379
It'’s the lunch
lady'’s last day.
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00:02:42,448 --> 00:02:44,724
I heard Mr. Kraft'’s
going to make a speech
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00:02:44,793 --> 00:02:46,137
in Mrs. Tornnanis'’ honor.
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00:02:46,206 --> 00:02:48,275
Uh-oh, whenever Mr. Kraft
makes an announcement
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00:02:48,344 --> 00:02:49,448
in the cafeteria,
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00:02:49,517 --> 00:02:51,551
you open your mouth
and get us in trouble.
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00:02:51,620 --> 00:02:53,275
That is not true, is it, Harvey?
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00:02:53,344 --> 00:02:54,655
Very true.
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00:02:54,724 --> 00:02:55,793
Attention, everyone.
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00:02:55,862 --> 00:02:57,502
Here he comes; Pretend
you Don'’t know me.
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00:02:57,551 --> 00:02:58,758
Today
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00:02:58,827 --> 00:03:01,241
we honor a woman
who, for the past 40 years,
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00:03:01,310 --> 00:03:04,000
has fed us our lunches
and given us our change.
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00:03:04,068 --> 00:03:06,206
Her dedication knows no bounds.
78
00:03:06,275 --> 00:03:07,862
She even served us food
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00:03:07,931 --> 00:03:10,034
through her long bout with mono.
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00:03:10,103 --> 00:03:13,379
And so, for you,
Ingrid tornnanis,
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00:03:13,448 --> 00:03:15,034
our appreciation
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00:03:15,103 --> 00:03:17,896
and this golden hairnet.
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00:03:20,275 --> 00:03:21,551
[ Crashing]
84
00:03:21,620 --> 00:03:23,551
Oh, nothing to worry about.
85
00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:25,379
Just a vat of
sloppy Joes spilled.
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00:03:25,448 --> 00:03:26,724
You want to get that?
87
00:03:26,793 --> 00:03:28,551
Okay, and i'’ll mail you this.
88
00:03:28,620 --> 00:03:30,379
Let'’s hear it for
Mrs. Tornnanis.
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00:03:30,448 --> 00:03:32,620
She shouldn'’t have
to clean that up.
90
00:03:32,689 --> 00:03:34,068
[ Sighing]
91
00:03:34,137 --> 00:03:36,206
I mean, without a bucket.
92
00:03:37,517 --> 00:03:39,448
Anyway, moving on,
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00:03:39,517 --> 00:03:43,034
I would now like to
announce her replacement.
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00:03:43,103 --> 00:03:44,344
[ Snickering]
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00:03:44,413 --> 00:03:45,517
You.
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00:03:45,586 --> 00:03:48,034
Mm-hmm. That'’s right.
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00:03:48,103 --> 00:03:51,172
All of you will be
replacing Mrs. Tornnanis.
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00:03:51,241 --> 00:03:52,586
What kind of crazy...?
99
00:03:52,655 --> 00:03:54,586
Hey, Mr. Kraft is talking.
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00:03:54,655 --> 00:03:57,172
You will be divided
up into groups of three
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00:03:57,241 --> 00:03:59,965
and assigned lunch shifts.
102
00:04:00,034 --> 00:04:02,034
And this means all of you.
103
00:04:02,103 --> 00:04:05,103
You mean, i'’m going to
have to be of service to others?
104
00:04:05,172 --> 00:04:07,896
Except for cheerleaders
and football players.
105
00:04:07,965 --> 00:04:09,862
They'’ve done
more than their share
106
00:04:09,931 --> 00:04:11,241
for the school already.
107
00:04:11,310 --> 00:04:13,344
All right, i'’m off the hook.
108
00:04:13,413 --> 00:04:15,241
And, of course,
this applies only
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00:04:15,310 --> 00:04:17,413
to the first-string
football players.
110
00:04:17,482 --> 00:04:18,586
That is so unfair!
111
00:04:18,655 --> 00:04:19,517
[ Sighing]
112
00:04:19,586 --> 00:04:21,137
Run. Save yourselves.
113
00:04:21,206 --> 00:04:23,413
So, once again,
little miss contrarian
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00:04:23,482 --> 00:04:25,310
has said her little piece. Huh?
115
00:04:25,379 --> 00:04:29,172
Well, I am happy to announce
that the first team of three
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00:04:29,241 --> 00:04:31,689
to pull cafeteria
duty will be spellman,
117
00:04:31,758 --> 00:04:36,448
kinkle, and their little friend.
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00:04:36,517 --> 00:04:37,620
Sorry.
119
00:04:37,689 --> 00:04:38,793
What'’s wrong
120
00:04:38,862 --> 00:04:39,793
with your hand?
121
00:04:39,862 --> 00:04:41,344
My finger feels weird.
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00:04:41,413 --> 00:04:43,758
Sorry about you
being second string.
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00:04:43,827 --> 00:04:46,206
Sorry about you...
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00:04:46,275 --> 00:04:48,344
In general.
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00:04:49,965 --> 00:04:51,000
[ Sneezes]
126
00:04:53,758 --> 00:04:55,551
And the three of you can start
127
00:04:55,620 --> 00:04:57,965
by cleaning this up right now.
128
00:05:00,103 --> 00:05:02,068
I didn'’t sayanything.
129
00:05:06,689 --> 00:05:08,862
Zellie, brush me.
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00:05:08,931 --> 00:05:10,793
Salem, I brushed
you this morning.
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00:05:10,862 --> 00:05:12,137
I Don'’t have time.
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00:05:12,206 --> 00:05:15,206
I think the neighbor
is stealing our paper.
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00:05:15,275 --> 00:05:16,862
Hilda, I have a knot.
134
00:05:16,931 --> 00:05:18,000
Salem!
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00:05:18,068 --> 00:05:19,482
What makes you think that?
136
00:05:19,551 --> 00:05:22,310
Well, his shirt is all bulgy,
and the paper'’s gone.
137
00:05:22,379 --> 00:05:25,448
I'’m going to put an Indian
burial ground under his house.
138
00:05:25,517 --> 00:05:27,034
No. That sort of thing affects
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00:05:27,103 --> 00:05:28,344
the whole neighborhood.
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00:05:28,413 --> 00:05:30,758
It'’s real uncomfortable.
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00:05:30,827 --> 00:05:32,310
Salem, you do not have a knot.
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00:05:32,379 --> 00:05:33,413
[ Sneezes]
143
00:05:33,482 --> 00:05:35,793
You'’re not coming down
with something, are you?
144
00:05:35,862 --> 00:05:36,965
Probably just allergies.
145
00:05:37,034 --> 00:05:38,103
I'’d check
146
00:05:38,172 --> 00:05:40,206
the pollen count...
If I had the paper.
147
00:05:40,275 --> 00:05:42,482
Let me make you
some tea just in case.
148
00:05:42,551 --> 00:05:43,827
Do you want a blanket?
149
00:05:43,896 --> 00:05:46,689
Hilda gets attention just
'’cause she might be sick.
150
00:05:46,758 --> 00:05:48,034
Hey!
151
00:05:48,103 --> 00:05:49,241
[ Sneezes]
152
00:05:49,310 --> 00:05:52,034
Oh, no, not you, too, Salem.
153
00:05:52,103 --> 00:05:54,379
[ Coughing weakly]
154
00:05:54,448 --> 00:05:55,689
Oh, yeah.
155
00:05:55,758 --> 00:05:57,241
Bring it on.
156
00:05:58,379 --> 00:05:59,793
Slow down.
157
00:06:00,931 --> 00:06:02,862
Mr. Kraft.
158
00:06:02,931 --> 00:06:04,413
Yes.
159
00:06:04,482 --> 00:06:05,551
I'’ve been wondering,
160
00:06:05,620 --> 00:06:07,310
do you think it'’s
such a good idea
161
00:06:07,379 --> 00:06:09,344
to have the students
work during lunch?
162
00:06:09,413 --> 00:06:11,379
No, I Don'’t think
it'’s a goodidea.
163
00:06:11,448 --> 00:06:13,103
I think it'’s a brilliant idea.
164
00:06:13,172 --> 00:06:15,034
And if Einstein had had
165
00:06:15,103 --> 00:06:16,793
these kind of
money-saving ideas,
166
00:06:16,862 --> 00:06:18,551
he could have
afforded a haircut.
167
00:06:21,103 --> 00:06:23,344
Okay. I was just wondering.
168
00:06:25,448 --> 00:06:26,758
Mrs. Quick.
169
00:06:26,827 --> 00:06:28,448
I had an extra copy of this book
170
00:06:28,517 --> 00:06:30,793
and I thought you
might be interested in it.
171
00:06:30,862 --> 00:06:32,206
How to be confident?
172
00:06:32,275 --> 00:06:34,206
You know, from a
literary standpoint.
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00:06:34,275 --> 00:06:36,068
Oh, Don'’t worry.
I'’m not offended.
174
00:06:36,137 --> 00:06:38,206
I just hope it'’s
more effective than
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00:06:38,275 --> 00:06:40,172
confidence for dummies.
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00:06:41,758 --> 00:06:44,724
[ Nasal tone]: Uh, hey...!
177
00:06:44,793 --> 00:06:46,827
I think i'’m getting worse.
178
00:06:46,896 --> 00:06:48,068
Either that, or you do
179
00:06:48,137 --> 00:06:49,931
a lousy Jerry Lewis
impersonation.
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00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:51,862
I'’m pretty sure
my liver'’s involved.
181
00:06:51,931 --> 00:06:55,137
Maybe if you would
scratch behind my ears...
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00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:56,379
Ah...
183
00:06:56,448 --> 00:06:58,103
Well, you Don'’t feel hot.
184
00:06:58,172 --> 00:07:00,000
Maybe I should take
your temperature.
185
00:07:00,068 --> 00:07:02,000
Under the tongue.
Under the tongue.
186
00:07:02,068 --> 00:07:03,068
Open up.
187
00:07:04,034 --> 00:07:06,172
All right, i'’ll check
it in a few minutes.
188
00:07:08,137 --> 00:07:10,344
[ Humming]
189
00:07:10,413 --> 00:07:11,689
Hmm?
190
00:07:11,758 --> 00:07:13,689
[ Laughing]
191
00:07:13,758 --> 00:07:16,034
This ought to do it.
192
00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:17,206
Uh-huh, mm-hmm.
193
00:07:17,275 --> 00:07:18,379
So what you'’re saying
194
00:07:18,448 --> 00:07:20,448
is that this "westbridge
town meeting"
195
00:07:20,517 --> 00:07:22,413
will actually
encourage the students
196
00:07:22,482 --> 00:07:23,758
to express their opinions?
197
00:07:23,827 --> 00:07:25,103
Exactly.
198
00:07:25,172 --> 00:07:27,517
Why Don'’t we just let the
students run the school?
199
00:07:27,586 --> 00:07:29,310
That'’ll make for
some high sats.
200
00:07:29,379 --> 00:07:30,137
But...
201
00:07:30,206 --> 00:07:31,724
No name calling.
202
00:07:31,793 --> 00:07:34,689
I said no town meeting.
203
00:07:37,586 --> 00:07:38,689
Miss spellman.
204
00:07:38,758 --> 00:07:39,896
Hey, Mr. Kraft.
205
00:07:41,103 --> 00:07:42,724
[ Sneezes]
206
00:07:44,448 --> 00:07:46,862
And they say we
Don'’t have mice.
207
00:07:46,931 --> 00:07:47,931
Ha!
208
00:07:51,275 --> 00:07:52,527
Oh, poor Salem.
We didn'’t realize
209
00:07:52,551 --> 00:07:55,034
you were running such
a high temperature.
210
00:07:55,103 --> 00:07:56,896
I Don'’t want to be a burden.
211
00:07:56,965 --> 00:07:58,379
[ Coughing weakly]
212
00:07:58,448 --> 00:08:01,827
As long as you drop everything
and stay focused on me,
213
00:08:01,896 --> 00:08:04,413
I should be fine.
214
00:08:04,482 --> 00:08:05,620
[ Moaning]
215
00:08:05,689 --> 00:08:07,172
Sabrina. Sabrina.
216
00:08:07,241 --> 00:08:09,172
I'’m too weak to lie.
217
00:08:09,241 --> 00:08:11,379
I didn'’t wear my mittens today.
218
00:08:11,448 --> 00:08:13,620
I told you we should
have glued them on.
219
00:08:13,689 --> 00:08:16,655
Remind me to scold you
when you'’re not so pathetic.
220
00:08:16,724 --> 00:08:18,379
[ Moaning]
221
00:08:19,379 --> 00:08:20,482
[ Clears throat]
222
00:08:20,551 --> 00:08:22,275
[ Moaning]
223
00:08:22,344 --> 00:08:24,689
I'’m just going to
zap myself into bed.
224
00:08:24,758 --> 00:08:26,034
[ Nose blowing]
225
00:08:26,103 --> 00:08:27,379
Gross.
226
00:08:27,448 --> 00:08:28,689
Here'’s some chicken soup.
227
00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:30,482
It'’s good for you.
228
00:08:30,551 --> 00:08:33,000
Oh, no, dear,
it'’s for your finger.
229
00:08:35,344 --> 00:08:36,862
Did I mention...?
230
00:08:36,931 --> 00:08:38,206
[ Moaning]
231
00:08:38,275 --> 00:08:39,517
[ Coughing]
232
00:08:40,931 --> 00:08:43,034
Sabrina.
233
00:08:43,103 --> 00:08:44,241
Yes?
234
00:08:44,310 --> 00:08:46,310
Where do you
think you'’re going?
235
00:08:46,379 --> 00:08:47,379
School.
236
00:08:47,413 --> 00:08:48,551
Let'’s see your finger.
237
00:08:48,620 --> 00:08:49,700
Oh, it looks fine. Come on.
238
00:08:49,758 --> 00:08:52,103
Oh. Not only have
you got finger flu,
239
00:08:52,172 --> 00:08:54,172
but you'’ve
obviously gone blind.
240
00:08:54,241 --> 00:08:55,586
I'’ve got to go to school.
241
00:08:55,655 --> 00:08:56,803
I can'’t let Harvey
and Valerie do
242
00:08:56,827 --> 00:08:57,758
lunch duty without me.
243
00:08:57,827 --> 00:08:59,172
The whole thing'’s my fault.
244
00:08:59,241 --> 00:09:00,655
You'’re staying home today
245
00:09:00,724 --> 00:09:01,655
and that'’s that.
246
00:09:01,724 --> 00:09:02,724
Salem'’s still sick.
247
00:09:02,758 --> 00:09:04,517
You can keep each other company.
248
00:09:04,586 --> 00:09:05,689
Where is he?
249
00:09:05,758 --> 00:09:06,896
[ Laughing]
250
00:09:06,965 --> 00:09:09,068
I Don'’t care what
the critics say.
251
00:09:09,137 --> 00:09:11,862
Doonesburymakes
Alzheimer'’s funny.
252
00:09:11,931 --> 00:09:14,172
[ Laughing]
253
00:09:14,241 --> 00:09:17,793
[ Coughing]
254
00:09:17,862 --> 00:09:20,310
Oh, I feel awful.
255
00:09:20,379 --> 00:09:22,379
[ Coughing]
256
00:09:22,448 --> 00:09:26,379
All i'’ve done all day is eat,
sleep and stare off into space.
257
00:09:26,448 --> 00:09:28,206
What an awful existence.
258
00:09:28,275 --> 00:09:30,793
Hey, I Don'’t dump
on your lifestyle.
259
00:09:30,862 --> 00:09:32,551
I just can'’t enjoy myself,
260
00:09:32,620 --> 00:09:35,379
knowing that Harvey and
Valerie have to serve lunch
261
00:09:35,448 --> 00:09:36,862
all by themselves.
262
00:09:40,034 --> 00:09:43,517
We interrupt our regularly
scheduled program
263
00:09:43,586 --> 00:09:44,827
for a special report.
264
00:09:44,896 --> 00:09:47,000
Chaos at westbridge high school.
265
00:09:48,068 --> 00:09:50,000
Just let me assure the public
266
00:09:50,068 --> 00:09:52,379
that we do have the
situation under control.
267
00:09:52,448 --> 00:09:55,103
I'’ll be seeing to it that
the two lunch servers
268
00:09:55,172 --> 00:09:57,413
who caused this
fracas will be expelled.
269
00:09:57,482 --> 00:09:59,931
They are Harvey kinkle
and Valerie birckhead.
270
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,172
They will be expelled,
271
00:10:01,241 --> 00:10:03,172
impaled on stakes, and
paraded through town.
272
00:10:03,241 --> 00:10:05,896
Reporter: Sources say this
would have never happened
273
00:10:05,965 --> 00:10:07,689
if they hadn'’t
been short-handed.
274
00:10:09,931 --> 00:10:10,862
Oh, no.
275
00:10:10,931 --> 00:10:12,586
I got to get to school.
276
00:10:14,482 --> 00:10:15,793
Some people
277
00:10:15,862 --> 00:10:18,206
just Don'’t know how
to enjoy being sick.
278
00:10:18,275 --> 00:10:20,517
[ Yawning]
279
00:10:20,586 --> 00:10:22,241
Mmm.
280
00:10:26,724 --> 00:10:30,206
Excuse me, excuse me.
281
00:10:30,275 --> 00:10:31,551
Where do you want me?
282
00:10:31,620 --> 00:10:33,724
Harvey: Sabrina. I
thought you were sick.
283
00:10:33,793 --> 00:10:36,206
I couldn'’t let them turn
you guys into kabobs.
284
00:10:36,275 --> 00:10:38,620
Okay, well, she
obviously still has a fever.
285
00:10:38,689 --> 00:10:41,034
Oh, no. We'’re out
of tapioca pudding.
286
00:10:41,103 --> 00:10:42,551
I'’d better go get some.
287
00:10:42,620 --> 00:10:43,655
Run. I'’ll cover you.
288
00:10:43,724 --> 00:10:44,965
Short delay.
289
00:10:45,034 --> 00:10:46,931
Mrs. Tornnanis only had
a sixth grade education
290
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:48,241
and she could do this job.
291
00:10:48,310 --> 00:10:50,000
Uh-oh, the tater
tots are burning.
292
00:10:50,068 --> 00:10:51,724
Here. Thanks.
293
00:10:56,241 --> 00:10:58,137
[ Sneezes]
294
00:11:00,896 --> 00:11:02,172
What just happened?
295
00:11:02,241 --> 00:11:03,689
A little chili, please.
296
00:11:03,758 --> 00:11:05,000
Hello?
297
00:11:05,068 --> 00:11:07,931
I know scooping is a
difficult skill to master.
298
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:09,517
That'’s enough, Libby.
299
00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:10,758
Get out of line.
300
00:11:13,827 --> 00:11:15,896
[ Screams]
301
00:11:15,965 --> 00:11:20,241
Oh. I ambecoming more assertive.
302
00:11:21,517 --> 00:11:23,620
Oh, no. Mrs. Quick
caught my magic.
303
00:11:30,034 --> 00:11:32,034
Why is there a seminole
in full headdress
304
00:11:32,103 --> 00:11:33,310
in the neighbor'’s yard?
305
00:11:33,379 --> 00:11:34,275
Coincidence?
306
00:11:34,344 --> 00:11:35,448
Mm-hmm.
307
00:11:35,517 --> 00:11:36,827
Salem, you smell
308
00:11:36,896 --> 00:11:38,068
like chocolate.
309
00:11:38,137 --> 00:11:40,275
[ Sputtering]: Uh,
w-w-we didn'’t have
310
00:11:40,344 --> 00:11:41,482
any cough drops,
311
00:11:41,551 --> 00:11:43,241
so I substituted bon bons.
312
00:11:43,310 --> 00:11:44,896
You know, i'’m going to take
313
00:11:44,965 --> 00:11:46,482
your temperature again.
314
00:11:46,551 --> 00:11:48,310
Yeah. Let'’s see
how you'’re doing.
315
00:11:48,379 --> 00:11:49,379
Under the tongue.
316
00:11:49,413 --> 00:11:50,620
Under the tongue!
317
00:11:50,689 --> 00:11:52,137
No.
318
00:11:52,206 --> 00:11:54,758
I want a more accurate
reading this time.
319
00:11:54,827 --> 00:11:55,862
Armpit?
320
00:11:55,931 --> 00:11:58,862
Don'’t I get a... Vote in this?!
321
00:11:58,931 --> 00:12:00,758
Get me the s.P.C.A.!
322
00:12:00,827 --> 00:12:01,965
Ow!
323
00:12:02,034 --> 00:12:03,655
Man!
324
00:12:03,724 --> 00:12:05,241
Mrs. Quick was really forceful.
325
00:12:05,310 --> 00:12:06,379
Really? Do you think?
326
00:12:06,448 --> 00:12:08,724
Frank, Don'’t slouch.
327
00:12:08,793 --> 00:12:10,137
That'’s better.
328
00:12:10,206 --> 00:12:12,413
Oh, my spine...
329
00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:13,620
I got to call home.
330
00:12:20,344 --> 00:12:22,482
Oh, where is the dial tone?
331
00:12:22,551 --> 00:12:24,448
Boy, I tell you, if I had a dime
332
00:12:24,517 --> 00:12:26,931
for every quarter that
phone took from me.
333
00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:28,965
[ Rattling]
334
00:12:30,896 --> 00:12:33,172
Salem'’s been
faking it all along.
335
00:12:33,241 --> 00:12:34,413
Let'’s bust him
336
00:12:34,482 --> 00:12:35,655
now.
337
00:12:35,724 --> 00:12:36,862
Or...
338
00:12:36,931 --> 00:12:38,689
We could have some fun first.
339
00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:40,931
Dum-Dee-dum-dum-dum.
340
00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:43,896
That cat'’s going
to wish he was sick.
341
00:12:43,965 --> 00:12:44,965
[ Phone ringing]
342
00:12:45,034 --> 00:12:46,689
I'’ll get it.
343
00:12:46,758 --> 00:12:47,758
Hello?
344
00:12:47,793 --> 00:12:49,000
Aunt Zelda?
345
00:12:49,068 --> 00:12:51,103
Sabrina, I thought you
were upstairs taking a nap.
346
00:12:51,172 --> 00:12:52,103
You can punish me later.
347
00:12:52,172 --> 00:12:53,379
I sneaked off to school.
348
00:12:53,448 --> 00:12:55,562
My finger sneezed on Mrs.
Quick, and she caught my magic.
349
00:12:55,586 --> 00:12:56,724
What do I do?
350
00:12:56,793 --> 00:12:58,724
First thing, you'’re
in big trouble,
351
00:12:58,793 --> 00:12:59,896
and the next thing is
352
00:12:59,965 --> 00:13:01,689
get Mrs. Soon here quick.
353
00:13:01,758 --> 00:13:03,689
I mean, get Mrs.
Quick here soon.
354
00:13:03,758 --> 00:13:06,034
How? My finger
is all stuffed up.
355
00:13:06,103 --> 00:13:07,517
Then do it the mortal way
356
00:13:07,586 --> 00:13:09,310
and drink fluids.
357
00:13:09,379 --> 00:13:11,379
"The mortal way"?
358
00:13:11,448 --> 00:13:13,586
Okay, I need a
blindfold and a gun.
359
00:13:15,655 --> 00:13:17,344
Dum-Dee-dum-dum-dum.
360
00:13:17,413 --> 00:13:18,862
Well, Salem,
361
00:13:18,931 --> 00:13:21,482
your temperature
is alarmingly high.
362
00:13:21,551 --> 00:13:22,689
I'’m really sick?
363
00:13:22,758 --> 00:13:24,724
Yes, and that can
only mean one thing.
364
00:13:24,793 --> 00:13:27,482
More attention and sympathy?
365
00:13:27,551 --> 00:13:29,758
A nice cold bath.
366
00:13:30,862 --> 00:13:32,517
What?!
367
00:13:32,586 --> 00:13:34,068
I'’m feeling better.
368
00:13:35,344 --> 00:13:37,896
I am not an animal!
369
00:13:37,965 --> 00:13:39,793
Oh... yeah.
370
00:13:39,862 --> 00:13:40,862
Mrs. Quick?
371
00:13:40,896 --> 00:13:42,103
Yes, Sabrina?
372
00:13:42,172 --> 00:13:43,758
No running, Doug!
373
00:13:43,827 --> 00:13:44,965
Hmm.
374
00:13:45,034 --> 00:13:46,413
Uh... oh.
375
00:13:46,482 --> 00:13:47,620
I-I'’m feeling sick.
376
00:13:47,689 --> 00:13:48,586
Poor dear.
377
00:13:48,655 --> 00:13:50,551
Could you drive me home?
378
00:13:50,620 --> 00:13:52,137
Excuse me, Mr. Kraft?
379
00:13:52,206 --> 00:13:53,931
I'’d like a word with you.
380
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,827
Fine. If you must.
381
00:13:55,896 --> 00:13:57,655
[ Finger sneezes][ Sneezing]
382
00:13:57,724 --> 00:14:00,551
Ow! Hot foot!
383
00:14:00,620 --> 00:14:02,655
What'’s wrong with your finger?
384
00:14:02,724 --> 00:14:04,310
I slammed it in a car door.
385
00:14:04,379 --> 00:14:05,413
It'’ll be fine.
386
00:14:05,482 --> 00:14:08,000
I'’ll be in the cafeteria.
387
00:14:08,068 --> 00:14:09,275
Dear,
388
00:14:09,344 --> 00:14:11,655
you should see the
nurse about your stomach
389
00:14:11,724 --> 00:14:13,413
and perhaps some sort of surgeon
390
00:14:13,482 --> 00:14:14,482
about your finger.
391
00:14:15,724 --> 00:14:16,862
Oh, but...!
392
00:14:21,137 --> 00:14:23,482
Mr. Kraft,
393
00:14:23,551 --> 00:14:24,620
you have no right
394
00:14:24,689 --> 00:14:26,689
to make the students
work during lunch.
395
00:14:26,758 --> 00:14:28,931
Do you think I am doing this
396
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:31,034
just to make the students angry?
397
00:14:31,103 --> 00:14:33,413
That'’s just a delightful bonus.
398
00:14:33,482 --> 00:14:34,689
I am doing this
399
00:14:34,758 --> 00:14:36,758
to appease the school board,
400
00:14:36,827 --> 00:14:40,827
which is something that
we administrators do.
401
00:14:40,896 --> 00:14:44,000
Oh! You... You'’re nothing
402
00:14:44,068 --> 00:14:46,448
but the school
board'’s trained chimp.
403
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:52,103
Oh, dear.
404
00:14:52,172 --> 00:14:53,551
I'’m freaking out.
405
00:14:53,620 --> 00:14:55,724
I thought I was being confident.
406
00:14:56,758 --> 00:14:59,137
But it turns out
i'’m just insane.
407
00:14:59,206 --> 00:15:01,862
Think, Sabrina. Think.
408
00:15:01,931 --> 00:15:04,068
To hide the heart from
conflict and clashes,
409
00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:06,068
what we need are
Rose-colored glasses.
410
00:15:08,034 --> 00:15:09,241
[ Finger sneezes]
411
00:15:12,206 --> 00:15:13,758
What am I going to do?
412
00:15:13,827 --> 00:15:15,310
Mr. Kraft is a chimp
413
00:15:15,379 --> 00:15:17,620
and the world seems
altered somehow...
414
00:15:17,689 --> 00:15:21,137
And i'’m sure everything
will turn out just fine.
415
00:15:21,206 --> 00:15:22,344
I have to get home
416
00:15:22,413 --> 00:15:24,068
a kidnapped teacher and a chimp.
417
00:15:24,137 --> 00:15:25,275
Let'’s do it.
418
00:15:25,344 --> 00:15:27,275
Come, Mr. Kraft.
419
00:15:27,344 --> 00:15:29,931
Sabrina, your
finger is dripping.
420
00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:32,413
How fun!
421
00:15:33,517 --> 00:15:34,689
Can we hurry?
422
00:15:34,758 --> 00:15:37,241
I think there'’s one
thing in my room
423
00:15:37,310 --> 00:15:38,862
Mr. Kraft hasn'’t destroyed.
424
00:15:38,931 --> 00:15:40,103
Never mind.
425
00:15:40,172 --> 00:15:42,068
Okay, Dr. Brickman
is expecting us.
426
00:15:42,137 --> 00:15:44,448
Now, he'’s the foremost
authority on fractures.
427
00:15:45,586 --> 00:15:47,482
He'’s not half bad
at stuff like this.
428
00:15:47,551 --> 00:15:48,586
He can look
429
00:15:48,655 --> 00:15:49,965
at that finger,
430
00:15:50,034 --> 00:15:52,241
but until then, could
you put it somewhere?
431
00:15:52,310 --> 00:15:53,758
We'’re going to a doctor?
432
00:15:53,827 --> 00:15:54,896
Oh, good.
433
00:15:54,965 --> 00:15:56,724
I'’m due for a checkup.
434
00:15:59,206 --> 00:16:02,413
Mrs. Quick: Whee!
435
00:16:07,517 --> 00:16:10,172
I'’m beginning to think I
should have worn mittens.
436
00:16:10,241 --> 00:16:11,931
Sabrina spellman, the doctor
437
00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:13,310
will see you now.
438
00:16:15,724 --> 00:16:18,206
I'’m finished with this
if you'’d like to eat it.
439
00:16:22,379 --> 00:16:24,172
There'’s something
you should know
440
00:16:24,241 --> 00:16:25,413
about Dr. Brickman.
441
00:16:25,482 --> 00:16:27,965
Hello. I'’m Dr. Brickman.
442
00:16:29,379 --> 00:16:31,379
Let me guess: He has cold hands?
443
00:16:31,448 --> 00:16:34,379
He performed his
first operation at two.
444
00:16:34,448 --> 00:16:36,413
I even supervised my own birth.
445
00:16:36,482 --> 00:16:38,068
I'’m a complete professional.
446
00:16:42,034 --> 00:16:45,965
Patient'’s finger presents
as distended and yucky.
447
00:16:46,034 --> 00:16:49,448
Shoot. My insurance only
covers "ooky," but not "yucky."
448
00:16:49,517 --> 00:16:51,931
I'’m going to
have to drain this.
449
00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:53,931
This child is not coming
anywhere near me
450
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:55,275
with anything sharp.
451
00:16:55,344 --> 00:16:57,896
Ooh, my eyes are a little tired.
452
00:16:57,965 --> 00:17:00,965
Must be all the
lovely excitement.
453
00:17:01,034 --> 00:17:03,379
Mr. Kraft is a chimp!
454
00:17:03,448 --> 00:17:05,551
Mr. Kraft is a chimp...
455
00:17:05,620 --> 00:17:08,827
Just like curious George.
456
00:17:11,896 --> 00:17:12,896
Wow!
457
00:17:12,965 --> 00:17:14,448
That doesfeel better.
458
00:17:14,517 --> 00:17:16,241
I invented this device.
459
00:17:16,310 --> 00:17:17,793
Yes, and he named it
460
00:17:17,862 --> 00:17:19,862
"the wicked cool drainy thing."
461
00:17:21,586 --> 00:17:23,896
Now, i'’m ready for the others.
462
00:17:23,965 --> 00:17:26,827
Hmm, fascinating.
463
00:17:26,896 --> 00:17:28,689
Mrs. Quick, i'’m
going to ask you
464
00:17:28,758 --> 00:17:30,551
to point at Mr. Kraft and cough.
465
00:17:30,620 --> 00:17:31,758
Fine by me.
466
00:17:31,827 --> 00:17:33,413
Wait! Shouldn'’t
we get Mr. Kraft
467
00:17:33,482 --> 00:17:35,862
some Rose-colored glasses
for when he'’s transformed?
468
00:17:35,931 --> 00:17:38,965
I think we should use
something more medically sound.
469
00:17:40,310 --> 00:17:41,310
A lollipop?
470
00:17:41,379 --> 00:17:42,965
Okay, it'’s second opinion time.
471
00:17:43,034 --> 00:17:44,241
It'’s a magical lollipop.
472
00:17:44,310 --> 00:17:46,448
Anyone who sucks on
it will become a sucker
473
00:17:46,517 --> 00:17:48,448
who will believe
anything we tell them.
474
00:17:48,517 --> 00:17:50,758
It'’s a highly regarded
scientific procedure.
475
00:17:50,827 --> 00:17:51,862
And it comes
476
00:17:51,931 --> 00:17:53,620
in an assortment
of fruit flavors.
477
00:17:53,689 --> 00:17:55,448
Mrs. Quick, please proceed.
478
00:17:56,517 --> 00:17:57,793
[ Coughs]
479
00:18:02,068 --> 00:18:03,517
What'’s going on here?
480
00:18:03,586 --> 00:18:04,689
Sabrin...
481
00:18:04,758 --> 00:18:06,965
You'’re here rescuing
all these people
482
00:18:07,034 --> 00:18:08,896
on a secret mission for the FBI.
483
00:18:08,965 --> 00:18:10,241
No kidding.
484
00:18:10,310 --> 00:18:12,103
President Clinton went on TV
485
00:18:12,172 --> 00:18:14,379
and said you'’re a
big, fat stupid head.
486
00:18:14,448 --> 00:18:17,000
And that'’s why
i'’m a republican.
487
00:18:17,068 --> 00:18:18,482
Okay, that'’s enough.
488
00:18:18,551 --> 00:18:20,034
What do we do next, doctor?
489
00:18:20,103 --> 00:18:21,827
First of all, get back to where
490
00:18:21,896 --> 00:18:23,241
the spell took place,
491
00:18:23,310 --> 00:18:26,310
then put these in their ears,
and turn it counterclockwise.
492
00:18:26,379 --> 00:18:28,517
It'’ll erase their
memory of the spell.
493
00:18:28,586 --> 00:18:30,137
And what will erase
494
00:18:30,206 --> 00:18:32,724
my memory of having to do that?
495
00:18:34,965 --> 00:18:36,241
Mrs. Quick, i'’m going to stick
496
00:18:36,310 --> 00:18:37,976
this cotton swab in your
ear if you Don'’t mind.
497
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,241
I'’m sure nothing but good
498
00:18:39,310 --> 00:18:40,379
will come of it.
499
00:18:40,448 --> 00:18:42,827
I have to stick one
in your ear, too.
500
00:18:42,896 --> 00:18:43,517
Why?
501
00:18:43,586 --> 00:18:44,793
Because when I do,
502
00:18:44,862 --> 00:18:46,827
it will take years off your life
503
00:18:46,896 --> 00:18:49,310
and make you a famous
song and dance man.
504
00:18:49,379 --> 00:18:50,310
Oh, really?
505
00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:51,413
Well, then, swab away.
506
00:18:55,172 --> 00:18:57,000
Sabrina, what'’s going on here?
507
00:18:57,068 --> 00:18:59,034
Gross, gross, gross,
gross, gross, gross!
508
00:19:03,827 --> 00:19:06,103
"The school board'’s
trained chimp"?
509
00:19:06,172 --> 00:19:07,344
You realize
510
00:19:07,413 --> 00:19:09,620
what you are saying and to whom?
511
00:19:09,689 --> 00:19:11,206
[ Stammering]: Well, i-i-i...
512
00:19:11,275 --> 00:19:12,689
She'’s lost her confidence.
513
00:19:12,758 --> 00:19:15,000
I mean, yes, I do.
514
00:19:15,068 --> 00:19:16,172
You'’re their monkey.
515
00:19:16,241 --> 00:19:17,689
You do what they want you to
516
00:19:17,758 --> 00:19:19,931
even though deep
down you think it'’s wrong.
517
00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:22,275
You know, I used to respect you.
518
00:19:22,344 --> 00:19:24,448
Well...
519
00:19:24,517 --> 00:19:29,586
You really know how to hit a
guy'’s sore spot, Don'’t you?
520
00:19:29,655 --> 00:19:31,931
You'’ll never teach
the students values
521
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:33,275
by exploiting them.
522
00:19:33,344 --> 00:19:37,103
Okay, so we agree to disagree.
523
00:19:37,172 --> 00:19:40,206
Maybe I will hire
a new lunch lady.
524
00:19:40,275 --> 00:19:41,068
Yes!
525
00:19:41,137 --> 00:19:42,482
But the students
526
00:19:42,551 --> 00:19:45,172
will have to keep working
their shifts until I do.
527
00:19:45,241 --> 00:19:47,379
You got it?
528
00:19:47,448 --> 00:19:49,000
[ Groans]: Oh...!
529
00:19:50,344 --> 00:19:53,172
That includes football
players and cheerleaders.
530
00:19:53,241 --> 00:19:54,827
Oh, not in this universe.
531
00:19:54,896 --> 00:19:58,310
[ Forcefully]: Football
players and cheerleaders.
532
00:19:58,379 --> 00:19:59,862
Okay!
533
00:19:59,931 --> 00:20:01,862
Geez, how do you
really feel about it?
534
00:20:01,931 --> 00:20:03,724
[ Sighs]
535
00:20:15,482 --> 00:20:17,758
Hey.
536
00:20:17,827 --> 00:20:19,965
I'’m concerned about
my newfound confidence.
537
00:20:20,034 --> 00:20:22,689
It seems to be limited to
getting me more tater tots.
538
00:20:22,758 --> 00:20:24,586
Yeah, but I really
appreciate it.
539
00:20:24,655 --> 00:20:25,827
You know, Valerie,
540
00:20:25,896 --> 00:20:28,275
I learned that if you
think you are confident,
541
00:20:28,344 --> 00:20:29,517
you are confident.
542
00:20:29,586 --> 00:20:32,241
I learned that childhood
traumas Don'’t go away
543
00:20:32,310 --> 00:20:33,344
by reading a book.
544
00:20:33,413 --> 00:20:35,620
Hey, hey, mister!
545
00:20:35,689 --> 00:20:37,517
Oh, no. I'’ve created a monster.
546
00:20:37,586 --> 00:20:40,655
You could fall and
really hurt yourself, dear.
547
00:20:40,724 --> 00:20:43,137
Come on, let'’s go
get you some cocoa.
548
00:20:43,206 --> 00:20:45,172
I want to be just like her...
549
00:20:45,241 --> 00:20:47,586
All except for the low
teacher'’s salary part.
550
00:20:47,655 --> 00:20:48,976
Heads up, here
comes the floor show.
551
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:50,862
Time to wake up
from my nightmare.
552
00:20:50,931 --> 00:20:51,862
Ow!
553
00:20:51,931 --> 00:20:54,206
Time to wake up
from my nightmare.
554
00:20:54,275 --> 00:20:55,482
Ow!
555
00:20:55,551 --> 00:20:58,620
Time to wake up
from my nightmare.
556
00:21:01,482 --> 00:21:02,862
[ Moaning, coughing]
557
00:21:02,931 --> 00:21:04,448
Oh, yeah.
558
00:21:04,517 --> 00:21:06,689
These glands are
definitely swollen.
559
00:21:06,758 --> 00:21:08,724
Doesn'’t that usually
require surgery?
560
00:21:08,793 --> 00:21:11,068
S-S-Sur... i'’m faking it!
561
00:21:11,137 --> 00:21:13,137
I faked the whole thing.
562
00:21:13,206 --> 00:21:14,241
What?
563
00:21:14,310 --> 00:21:15,413
How could you?
564
00:21:15,482 --> 00:21:16,896
[ Sobbing]: I just wanted
565
00:21:16,965 --> 00:21:18,034
a little attention.
566
00:21:18,103 --> 00:21:19,448
Is that so wrong?
567
00:21:19,517 --> 00:21:20,793
Yes.
568
00:21:20,862 --> 00:21:22,965
Salem, I hope you'’ve
learned your lesson.
569
00:21:23,034 --> 00:21:25,103
It'’s wrong for
a cat to cry wolf.
570
00:21:25,172 --> 00:21:26,344
I'’ll never do it again!
571
00:21:26,413 --> 00:21:28,172
Okay.
572
00:21:28,241 --> 00:21:31,551
I still have that
knot, you know?
38406
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