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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,330 --> 00:00:03,200 (bell ringing) 2 00:00:03,200 --> 00:00:04,470 ♪ When I wake up in the morning ♪ 3 00:00:04,470 --> 00:00:06,070 ♪ And the alarm gives out a warning ♪ 4 00:00:06,070 --> 00:00:09,200 ♪ I don't think I'll ever make it on time ♪ 5 00:00:09,210 --> 00:00:10,940 ♪ By the time I grab my books ♪ 6 00:00:10,940 --> 00:00:12,510 ♪ I give myself a look ♪ 7 00:00:12,510 --> 00:00:15,610 ♪ I'm at the corner just in time to see the bus fly by ♪ 8 00:00:15,610 --> 00:00:20,620 ♪ It's alright 'cause I'm saved by the bell ♪ 9 00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:22,920 ♪ If the teacher pops a test ♪ 10 00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:24,450 ♪ I know I'm in a mess ♪ 11 00:00:24,450 --> 00:00:27,290 ♪ And my dog ate all my homework last night ♪ 12 00:00:27,290 --> 00:00:28,990 ♪ Riding low in my chair ♪ 13 00:00:28,990 --> 00:00:30,390 ♪ She won't know that I'm there ♪ 14 00:00:30,390 --> 00:00:33,900 ♪ If I can hand it in tomorrow it will be alright ♪ 15 00:00:33,900 --> 00:00:38,870 ♪ It's alright 'cause I'm saved by the bell ♪ 16 00:00:39,470 --> 00:00:40,300 ♪ Yow ♪ 17 00:00:40,300 --> 00:00:43,100 (energetic music) 18 00:00:52,420 --> 00:00:55,280 ♪ It's alright 'cause I'm saved by the ♪ 19 00:00:55,290 --> 00:00:58,250 ♪ It's alright 'cause I'm saved by the ♪ 20 00:00:58,260 --> 00:01:03,090 ♪ It's alright 'cause I'm saved by the bell ♪ 21 00:01:06,360 --> 00:01:08,930 (upbeat music) 22 00:01:17,810 --> 00:01:18,640 - Screech? 23 00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:22,210 (audience laughing) 24 00:01:22,210 --> 00:01:23,610 - Good morning Zack. 25 00:01:23,610 --> 00:01:24,450 (audience laughing) 26 00:01:24,450 --> 00:01:25,280 - Oh hi, Kevin. 27 00:01:25,280 --> 00:01:26,180 Can I come in? 28 00:01:26,180 --> 00:01:27,520 - Sure, I'm dressed. 29 00:01:27,520 --> 00:01:29,950 (audience laughing) 30 00:01:29,950 --> 00:01:30,990 - So where's Screech? 31 00:01:32,490 --> 00:01:34,290 - He's in the bathroom, shaving. 32 00:01:34,290 --> 00:01:36,460 (audience laughing) 33 00:01:36,460 --> 00:01:38,260 - Come on, what's he shaving? 34 00:01:38,260 --> 00:01:39,160 His cat? 35 00:01:39,160 --> 00:01:41,300 (audience laughing) 36 00:01:41,300 --> 00:01:44,100 - No, he only shaves his cat on Halloween. 37 00:01:44,100 --> 00:01:46,800 (audience laughing) 38 00:01:46,800 --> 00:01:47,840 - Oh hi, Zack. 39 00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:49,100 - Hey Screech. 40 00:01:49,110 --> 00:01:51,110 - Where's the aftershave lotion, Kevin? 41 00:01:51,110 --> 00:01:53,580 - We don't have any, you're not using a blade yet. 42 00:01:53,580 --> 00:01:55,780 (audience laughing) 43 00:01:55,780 --> 00:01:57,480 - Screech, we're going to be late for school. 44 00:01:57,480 --> 00:01:58,710 What are you doing? 45 00:01:58,720 --> 00:02:00,250 - Growing up before your very eyes, 46 00:02:00,250 --> 00:02:02,480 but some people don't notice the elderly. 47 00:02:06,820 --> 00:02:09,160 - Are you sure he didn't drink the aftershave? 48 00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:10,390 (audience laughing) 49 00:02:10,390 --> 00:02:12,090 - No, yesterday was Screech's birthday 50 00:02:12,100 --> 00:02:14,000 and guess who forgot. 51 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,430 - Oh no, how could I have forgotten? 52 00:02:16,430 --> 00:02:18,430 - You, how about me? 53 00:02:18,440 --> 00:02:19,930 I'm programmed to remember. 54 00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:22,970 - Maybe you had one of those 24 hour computer viruses. 55 00:02:23,970 --> 00:02:25,710 - I hope it wasn't robot rot. 56 00:02:25,710 --> 00:02:27,910 (audience laughing) 57 00:02:27,910 --> 00:02:29,880 - Okay, let's go. 58 00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:32,010 - Hey Screech, happy birthday! 59 00:02:32,020 --> 00:02:33,520 Better late than never, huh? 60 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:35,720 - Ha, you told him, didn't you? 61 00:02:36,890 --> 00:02:38,650 - Excuse, I got to go to the bathroom. 62 00:02:38,660 --> 00:02:40,520 (audience laughing) 63 00:02:40,520 --> 00:02:43,120 (upbeat music) 64 00:02:47,860 --> 00:02:50,370 - Oh Slater, would you be so kind 65 00:02:50,370 --> 00:02:52,970 as to help a damsel in distress? 66 00:02:52,970 --> 00:02:55,070 - Lisa, are you all right? 67 00:02:55,070 --> 00:02:57,140 - Be a dear and disengage my locker. 68 00:02:59,610 --> 00:03:01,910 (thudding) 69 00:03:01,910 --> 00:03:03,440 Thank you, 70 00:03:03,450 --> 00:03:05,010 I always have depended on the kindness of strangers. 71 00:03:06,420 --> 00:03:08,680 - Okay now, Lisa, why are you acting like this? 72 00:03:08,690 --> 00:03:10,650 - Oh, I'm trying out for the drama festival. 73 00:03:10,650 --> 00:03:12,550 Do you believe me as a Southern Belle? 74 00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:15,020 - No, but I believe you as Northern Ding-dong. 75 00:03:15,020 --> 00:03:18,530 (audience laughing) 76 00:03:18,530 --> 00:03:20,860 - We're all trying out for the drama festival. 77 00:03:20,860 --> 00:03:23,600 I'm auditioning as Joan of Arc. 78 00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:25,630 - Hey, doesn't she die in the play? 79 00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:26,670 - Yes. 80 00:03:26,670 --> 00:03:27,740 - Go for it. 81 00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:29,700 (audience laughing) 82 00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:31,240 Hey, what part are you playing, Kelly? 83 00:03:31,240 --> 00:03:33,210 - Eliza Doolittle, from My Fair Lady. 84 00:03:33,210 --> 00:03:36,780 The rine in spine sties minely on the pline. 85 00:03:36,780 --> 00:03:38,310 (audience laughing) 86 00:03:38,320 --> 00:03:40,680 - Well babe, you can stand under my umbrella anytime. 87 00:03:40,680 --> 00:03:41,620 (audience laughing) 88 00:03:41,620 --> 00:03:43,650 - Oh Slater, maybe later. 89 00:03:43,650 --> 00:03:45,020 (audience laughing) 90 00:03:45,020 --> 00:03:46,420 - No loitering in the halls. 91 00:03:47,820 --> 00:03:49,020 - Says who? 92 00:03:49,030 --> 00:03:50,960 - Says me, I'm the hall monitor. 93 00:03:50,960 --> 00:03:53,330 - (gasps) You scare my hair, skinny. 94 00:03:53,330 --> 00:03:55,600 (audience laughing) 95 00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:56,560 - You'll sing a different tune 96 00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:57,930 when I throw you in detention. 97 00:03:57,930 --> 00:03:59,470 - I don't know a different tune, 98 00:03:59,470 --> 00:04:02,200 I had a hard enough time learning that one, love. 99 00:04:02,210 --> 00:04:03,040 (audience laughing) 100 00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:03,870 - Some sick chick. 101 00:04:05,310 --> 00:04:06,670 - Ooh. 102 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:08,040 Hi Screech, how's it going? 103 00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:10,410 - Ha, too little, too late. 104 00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:12,980 (audience laughing) 105 00:04:12,980 --> 00:04:14,780 - We've got to do something about Screech's birthday. 106 00:04:14,780 --> 00:04:16,980 - We forgot it, isn't that enough? 107 00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:18,420 (audience laughing) 108 00:04:18,420 --> 00:04:19,590 - Look, Screech is our friend and we let him down. 109 00:04:19,590 --> 00:04:21,660 We have to make it up to him. 110 00:04:21,660 --> 00:04:24,390 - Okay, what are we going to do for the cute, little geek? 111 00:04:24,390 --> 00:04:26,360 (audience laughing) 112 00:04:26,360 --> 00:04:28,000 - Well, it's got to be something really special 113 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:30,600 to make up for not remembering his birthday. 114 00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:32,570 - Why don't we send him to Disney World? 115 00:04:32,570 --> 00:04:34,370 (audience laughing) 116 00:04:34,370 --> 00:04:35,400 - We can't afford that. 117 00:04:35,410 --> 00:04:36,800 - We could if we mailed him. 118 00:04:36,810 --> 00:04:37,870 (audience laughing) 119 00:04:37,870 --> 00:04:39,670 - Wait, I've got it. 120 00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:41,210 This is genius. 121 00:04:41,210 --> 00:04:44,250 Today, we'll give Screech a surprise party. 122 00:04:44,250 --> 00:04:46,380 - But his birthday was yesterday. 123 00:04:46,380 --> 00:04:47,950 - That's the surprise. 124 00:04:47,950 --> 00:04:49,750 - Now this will make Bayside history. 125 00:04:49,750 --> 00:04:52,090 It won't be just any surprise party, 126 00:04:52,090 --> 00:04:54,420 it'll be the most daring birthday party ever. 127 00:04:54,420 --> 00:04:56,290 - Oh, sounds exciting. 128 00:04:56,290 --> 00:04:58,090 - Wait, I don't know about this, it sounds dangerous, 129 00:04:58,090 --> 00:04:59,190 I'm getting nervous. 130 00:04:59,200 --> 00:05:00,630 (audience laughing) 131 00:05:00,630 --> 00:05:01,830 - Oh, will someone shoot her with a tranquilizer dart? 132 00:05:01,830 --> 00:05:03,430 (audience laughing) 133 00:05:03,430 --> 00:05:04,900 - Now we're going to give Screech 134 00:05:04,900 --> 00:05:08,700 a surprise party here at school, during sixth period. 135 00:05:08,710 --> 00:05:10,310 And do you know where it's going to be? 136 00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:12,510 In Belding's office. 137 00:05:12,510 --> 00:05:14,880 (audience laughing) 138 00:05:14,880 --> 00:05:15,940 - Belding's office? 139 00:05:15,950 --> 00:05:17,210 That's impossible! 140 00:05:17,210 --> 00:05:19,050 - Oh come on, Jessie, don't you understand? 141 00:05:19,050 --> 00:05:20,520 No guts, no glory. 142 00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:21,650 Hey, the bigger the challenge, 143 00:05:21,650 --> 00:05:23,620 the more it will mean to Screech. 144 00:05:23,620 --> 00:05:25,290 - Look, I am class president, 145 00:05:25,290 --> 00:05:27,760 I could be ruined here at Bayside. 146 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:29,320 - Yeah, let's risk it. 147 00:05:29,330 --> 00:05:31,390 - [Zack] All right. 148 00:05:31,390 --> 00:05:32,830 - Zack, this is crazy. 149 00:05:32,830 --> 00:05:34,530 How you going to get Belding out of his office? 150 00:05:34,530 --> 00:05:37,470 - I'm not, Bayside's three finest actresses are. 151 00:05:39,770 --> 00:05:40,600 (audience laughing) 152 00:05:40,600 --> 00:05:41,670 Trust me. 153 00:05:41,670 --> 00:05:42,500 Hey Max. 154 00:05:43,910 --> 00:05:45,310 - What's up, Zack? 155 00:05:45,310 --> 00:05:46,940 Can you make us a birthday cake for Screech? 156 00:05:46,940 --> 00:05:48,480 - Oh, when do you need it? 157 00:05:48,480 --> 00:05:49,440 - Yesterday. 158 00:05:49,450 --> 00:05:50,280 (audience laughing) 159 00:05:50,280 --> 00:05:51,950 - Ask me tomorrow. 160 00:05:51,950 --> 00:05:53,450 Well maybe I can help. 161 00:05:53,450 --> 00:05:55,850 I just happen to have my Magical Cookbook with me. 162 00:05:55,850 --> 00:05:57,990 Ooh. (laughs) 163 00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:02,420 - Huh, but there's no cake in there? 164 00:06:02,430 --> 00:06:03,760 - Well maybe it's not ready yet. 165 00:06:07,760 --> 00:06:09,030 (bell dinging) 166 00:06:09,030 --> 00:06:10,500 I think it's done. 167 00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:12,070 (audience laughing) 168 00:06:12,070 --> 00:06:13,330 - [Zack] All right! 169 00:06:13,340 --> 00:06:14,370 - Whoa. 170 00:06:14,370 --> 00:06:15,240 - Can I taste it? 171 00:06:18,580 --> 00:06:20,310 (laughing) 172 00:06:20,310 --> 00:06:21,380 - Whoa. - Wow. 173 00:06:22,780 --> 00:06:24,550 - (laughs) You better wait and let it cool off. 174 00:06:24,550 --> 00:06:26,780 (audience laughing) 175 00:06:26,780 --> 00:06:29,650 - Okay, but there's still one big problem, Preppy. 176 00:06:29,650 --> 00:06:31,090 How are we going to pull this party off 177 00:06:31,090 --> 00:06:33,990 with Nasty Neil patrolling the halls? 178 00:06:33,990 --> 00:06:35,320 - We'll have to eliminate him. 179 00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:36,520 - Hey, count me out. 180 00:06:36,530 --> 00:06:38,160 I'm not killing anyone for Screech. 181 00:06:38,160 --> 00:06:40,030 (audience laughing) 182 00:06:40,030 --> 00:06:42,800 - Look Slater, all we got to do is record Neil's voice 183 00:06:42,800 --> 00:06:45,670 on this tape recorder and he's hall monitor history. 184 00:06:45,670 --> 00:06:47,130 - All right. 185 00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:47,970 Go. 186 00:06:48,810 --> 00:06:49,800 - Slow down, idiot. 187 00:06:54,340 --> 00:06:55,580 - What did you say? 188 00:06:55,580 --> 00:06:56,910 - Slow down, dummy. 189 00:06:58,280 --> 00:06:59,180 - Thanks. 190 00:07:06,490 --> 00:07:08,490 - Oh you guys don't stand a chance, 191 00:07:08,490 --> 00:07:10,260 I'm going to win that drama festival. 192 00:07:10,260 --> 00:07:13,530 - Oh no way, my Joan Of Arc will light up the stage. 193 00:07:13,530 --> 00:07:14,960 - Only if they burn you at the stake. 194 00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:17,160 (girls shouting) 195 00:07:17,170 --> 00:07:18,000 - Hey girls! 196 00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:18,830 Hey girls! 197 00:07:18,840 --> 00:07:19,670 - [Girls] Yeah? 198 00:07:19,670 --> 00:07:21,000 - Shut up and move it. 199 00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:22,000 - Ooh. 200 00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:23,270 - You can't talk to us like that. 201 00:07:23,270 --> 00:07:25,070 - Yeah, you're just a jerk with a badge. 202 00:07:25,070 --> 00:07:26,970 - Look I've had enough of your lip. 203 00:07:26,980 --> 00:07:29,440 - And we have all we need of yours. 204 00:07:29,450 --> 00:07:32,450 (audience laughing) 205 00:07:35,250 --> 00:07:38,650 - (laughs) Hey Neil, can I ask you a question? 206 00:07:38,660 --> 00:07:39,990 - Hurry up, I don't have all day. 207 00:07:39,990 --> 00:07:41,820 - Now you can tell me the truth, 208 00:07:41,830 --> 00:07:43,220 what do you really think of me? 209 00:07:43,230 --> 00:07:44,690 - You're a creep. 210 00:07:44,690 --> 00:07:46,790 - (laughs) I was hoping you'd say that. 211 00:07:50,330 --> 00:07:52,900 (upbeat music) 212 00:07:56,370 --> 00:07:57,340 - Mr. Dewey? 213 00:07:57,340 --> 00:07:58,170 - Present. 214 00:07:58,170 --> 00:07:59,410 (audience laughing) 215 00:07:59,410 --> 00:08:00,910 - I sent 14 more kids to detention today, sir. 216 00:08:00,910 --> 00:08:02,610 - Detention's too crowded, 217 00:08:02,610 --> 00:08:05,710 maybe we should bring back the death penalty. (laughing) 218 00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:08,050 (audience laughing) 219 00:08:08,050 --> 00:08:09,580 Little Vice Principal humor. 220 00:08:11,150 --> 00:08:13,720 (bell ringing) 221 00:08:17,690 --> 00:08:20,500 Fasten your seat belts, we're about to blast off 222 00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:23,030 into the magic kingdom of Algebra. 223 00:08:23,030 --> 00:08:23,930 (audience laughing) 224 00:08:23,930 --> 00:08:25,330 - Mr. Dewey? 225 00:08:25,330 --> 00:08:27,870 Would you explain that quadratic equation on page 58? 226 00:08:29,310 --> 00:08:31,740 - Why not, it'll kill some time before the bell rings. 227 00:08:31,740 --> 00:08:34,810 (audience laughing) 228 00:08:34,810 --> 00:08:36,640 - [Neil] Hurry up, I don't have all day. 229 00:08:36,650 --> 00:08:40,310 - Relax Neil, some of us learn faster than others. 230 00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:41,620 - Mr. Dewey? 231 00:08:41,620 --> 00:08:42,550 - [Mr. Dewey] Where was I? 232 00:08:42,550 --> 00:08:44,320 - [Neil] Shut up and move it. 233 00:08:44,320 --> 00:08:45,290 (audience laughing) 234 00:08:45,290 --> 00:08:47,050 - What did you say? 235 00:08:47,060 --> 00:08:48,590 - Nothing Mr. Dewey, honest. 236 00:08:48,590 --> 00:08:51,830 - Neil, don't mess with the Dew-man. 237 00:08:51,830 --> 00:08:54,460 (audience laughing) 238 00:08:54,460 --> 00:08:56,600 - [Neil] Look, I've had enough of your lip. 239 00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:57,600 - Say what? 240 00:08:57,600 --> 00:08:58,700 - [Neil] You're a creep. 241 00:08:58,700 --> 00:09:00,100 (audience laughing) 242 00:09:00,100 --> 00:09:02,740 - I'm so mad I could spit nails. 243 00:09:02,740 --> 00:09:04,540 (audience laughing) 244 00:09:04,540 --> 00:09:06,440 - But Mr. Dewey, I didn't say anything. 245 00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:08,280 - Hey Neil, we all heard your voice. 246 00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:09,810 - But-- 247 00:09:09,810 --> 00:09:11,750 - The only butt I want to see is yours in detention! 248 00:09:11,750 --> 00:09:13,650 And you won't be needing this anymore. 249 00:09:13,650 --> 00:09:14,480 Out! 250 00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:16,950 (audience laughing) 251 00:09:16,950 --> 00:09:19,150 - Mr. Dewey, I think the next hall monitor 252 00:09:19,160 --> 00:09:21,520 should be someone who's fair, decent, and honest. 253 00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:23,490 Someone we really care about. 254 00:09:23,490 --> 00:09:26,060 - I'm a teacher, I can't be hall monitor. 255 00:09:26,060 --> 00:09:27,490 (audience laughing) 256 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:29,330 - He means Screech, sir. 257 00:09:29,330 --> 00:09:30,570 - Screech? 258 00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:31,900 - Mr. Dewey, I'd like to officially place 259 00:09:31,900 --> 00:09:33,770 Screech's name in nomination. 260 00:09:33,770 --> 00:09:35,240 - Yeah! 261 00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:37,040 - [Students] Screech, Screech, Screech, Screech, Screech, 262 00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:39,970 Screech, Screech, Screech, Screech! 263 00:09:41,510 --> 00:09:43,910 - Well Screech, now that you're hall monitor, 264 00:09:43,910 --> 00:09:45,480 just remember who put you there. 265 00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:48,450 - You're right, I'll never forget Mr. Dewey. 266 00:09:48,450 --> 00:09:49,820 - Hey, not him, me. 267 00:09:49,820 --> 00:09:51,690 I think a permanent hall pass 268 00:09:51,690 --> 00:09:53,490 would be a nice way of saying thank you. 269 00:09:53,490 --> 00:09:55,060 - Sure Zack. 270 00:09:55,060 --> 00:09:57,360 - Thanks Screech, you're a pal. 271 00:09:57,360 --> 00:10:00,800 - Consider it an early birthday present. 272 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:02,330 (bell ringing) 273 00:10:02,330 --> 00:10:03,930 Duty calls! 274 00:10:03,930 --> 00:10:05,830 Hey, hey, excuse me! 275 00:10:05,840 --> 00:10:07,800 No running in the halls! 276 00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:10,400 Hey, can't you read! 277 00:10:10,410 --> 00:10:12,310 - Yeah I can read. 278 00:10:12,310 --> 00:10:15,080 - Good, save me a seat in the library. 279 00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:18,080 (audience laughing) 280 00:10:19,220 --> 00:10:21,650 - Alright now, Preppy, everything is set. 281 00:10:21,650 --> 00:10:23,380 We own the halls. 282 00:10:23,390 --> 00:10:26,620 Now all we have to do is get Belding out of his office. 283 00:10:26,620 --> 00:10:29,620 - The girls are taking care of that as we speak. 284 00:10:29,630 --> 00:10:31,790 (chiming) 285 00:10:31,790 --> 00:10:34,460 (phone ringing) 286 00:10:37,500 --> 00:10:40,370 - Hello, Belding speaking. 287 00:10:40,370 --> 00:10:43,270 - Oh Mr. Belding, you're like sunshine on a rainy day. 288 00:10:43,270 --> 00:10:45,670 I'm in desperate need of a favor. 289 00:10:45,680 --> 00:10:47,410 - Okay, but who is this? 290 00:10:47,410 --> 00:10:48,840 - I'm one of your students, 291 00:10:48,850 --> 00:10:51,680 just a poor little old magnolia who's lost at the mall. 292 00:10:51,680 --> 00:10:53,810 - Now, now, now, now, just stay calm 293 00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:54,920 and tell me your name. 294 00:10:56,190 --> 00:10:57,950 - Why speak of names, mon amie, 295 00:10:57,950 --> 00:11:00,120 when we can speak of amor. 296 00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:01,620 - What is this? 297 00:11:01,620 --> 00:11:03,560 If you don't tell me who you are, I can't help you. 298 00:11:03,560 --> 00:11:06,060 - Me old man told me never to give me name 299 00:11:06,060 --> 00:11:08,530 to a stranger over the phone. 300 00:11:08,530 --> 00:11:09,930 - Now who's on the line? 301 00:11:09,930 --> 00:11:11,530 Is this some kind of a prank. 302 00:11:11,530 --> 00:11:13,800 - Sir, I would never prank a Yankee, 303 00:11:13,800 --> 00:11:15,100 I'm a split personality 304 00:11:15,100 --> 00:11:16,400 and my other two personalities 305 00:11:16,410 --> 00:11:18,170 are holding me against my will at the mall. 306 00:11:18,170 --> 00:11:19,010 - Am not? 307 00:11:19,010 --> 00:11:19,840 - Am too. 308 00:11:19,840 --> 00:11:21,080 - I believe you. 309 00:11:21,080 --> 00:11:23,540 But I need your name so I can help you. 310 00:11:23,550 --> 00:11:26,310 - Um, you may call me by Babette, 311 00:11:26,320 --> 00:11:29,950 and you can call me Betty Jo, Bobby Sue, Ann. 312 00:11:29,950 --> 00:11:32,620 - Betty Jo, Bobby Sue, Ann? 313 00:11:32,620 --> 00:11:34,860 - The name's Eliza, love. 314 00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:36,620 - Alright, alright, alright look. 315 00:11:36,630 --> 00:11:39,690 I know, I'll look for you in front of the corn dog stand. 316 00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:41,900 Now stay put, all of you . 317 00:11:41,900 --> 00:11:43,200 - I will. 318 00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:44,030 - I will. 319 00:11:44,030 --> 00:11:44,870 - I won't. 320 00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:46,930 (audience laughing) 321 00:11:46,940 --> 00:11:49,400 - Multiple personalities, I can't believe it. 322 00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:52,940 I have a sports car, I hope they'll all fit. 323 00:11:52,940 --> 00:11:54,210 (audience laughing) 324 00:11:54,210 --> 00:11:56,340 (phone ringing) 325 00:11:56,350 --> 00:11:57,310 - Hello? 326 00:11:57,310 --> 00:11:59,050 - Little Lamb, this is Jackal. 327 00:11:59,980 --> 00:12:02,920 (audience laughing) 328 00:12:09,090 --> 00:12:10,890 The balding eagle has left his nest. 329 00:12:10,890 --> 00:12:13,390 (audience laughing) 330 00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:16,000 (upbeat music) 331 00:12:19,140 --> 00:12:21,740 (bell ringing) 332 00:12:23,010 --> 00:12:26,140 (Screech groaning) 333 00:12:26,140 --> 00:12:26,970 - [Screech] Geez! 334 00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:29,740 (Screech groaning) 335 00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:32,750 (audience laughing) 336 00:12:35,650 --> 00:12:37,550 - Job got you down, Screech? 337 00:12:37,550 --> 00:12:40,490 (audience laughing) 338 00:12:40,490 --> 00:12:41,690 - Well this isn't so bad, 339 00:12:41,690 --> 00:12:44,420 except Muffin Sangria's wearing heels today. 340 00:12:44,430 --> 00:12:46,390 I think she gave me an extra bellybutton. 341 00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:48,030 (audience laughing) 342 00:12:48,030 --> 00:12:49,560 - Screech, there was a time when I was 343 00:12:49,570 --> 00:12:51,630 a puny, little run like you. 344 00:12:51,630 --> 00:12:53,270 Hard to believe, huh? 345 00:12:53,270 --> 00:12:54,740 (audience laughing) 346 00:12:54,740 --> 00:12:55,770 - You? 347 00:12:55,770 --> 00:12:57,070 Get out of here! 348 00:12:57,070 --> 00:12:59,940 - To be tough, you have to think tough. 349 00:12:59,940 --> 00:13:03,310 Personally, I think of myself as Dirty Harry. 350 00:13:03,310 --> 00:13:04,680 (audience laughing) 351 00:13:04,680 --> 00:13:06,980 Go ahead, make my day. 352 00:13:06,980 --> 00:13:08,980 (audience laughing) 353 00:13:08,990 --> 00:13:12,250 - Wow, think I could be a Dirty Harry, too? 354 00:13:12,260 --> 00:13:15,320 - You have to find your own hero, son. 355 00:13:15,320 --> 00:13:16,960 - Yeah. 356 00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:18,390 (lighthearted music) 357 00:13:18,390 --> 00:13:20,290 - We're going out Saturday night. 358 00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:21,930 - I'm not going out with you. 359 00:13:22,900 --> 00:13:25,130 - Okay, forget Saturday. 360 00:13:25,130 --> 00:13:26,630 We're going out right now. 361 00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:30,500 - (gasps) Help, help, isn't there anyone who can save me? 362 00:13:30,510 --> 00:13:33,870 (suspenseful music) 363 00:13:33,880 --> 00:13:35,540 - I'll save you. 364 00:13:35,540 --> 00:13:36,710 - Who's that? 365 00:13:36,710 --> 00:13:38,080 - It's Robo-Screech. 366 00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:39,810 - Hall monitor of the future. 367 00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:41,580 - And my hero. 368 00:13:42,990 --> 00:13:46,750 - You have three seconds to unhand her. 369 00:13:46,760 --> 00:13:47,650 - Get lost. 370 00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:48,760 - Two seconds. 371 00:13:48,760 --> 00:13:49,760 One second. 372 00:13:49,760 --> 00:13:53,560 (triumphant music) 373 00:13:53,560 --> 00:13:55,260 (audience laughing) 374 00:13:55,260 --> 00:13:56,760 - [Lisa] Robo-Screeh, I love you. 375 00:13:56,770 --> 00:13:59,200 - You have three seconds to kiss me, 376 00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:00,600 two seconds, one second. 377 00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:02,700 - [Lisa] Oh Robo-Screech. 378 00:14:02,710 --> 00:14:06,070 - Hey, no kissing in the halls. 379 00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:06,910 - Says who? 380 00:14:07,910 --> 00:14:08,840 Scanning. 381 00:14:08,850 --> 00:14:10,710 (imitates machine boinging) 382 00:14:10,710 --> 00:14:12,210 Doofus at 10 paces. 383 00:14:12,220 --> 00:14:13,480 - I want to be hall monitor again. 384 00:14:13,480 --> 00:14:15,820 I'm here to get my job back. 385 00:14:15,820 --> 00:14:16,620 - Impossible. 386 00:14:16,620 --> 00:14:18,150 - Oh yeah? 387 00:14:18,150 --> 00:14:19,190 - Draw. 388 00:14:19,190 --> 00:14:20,320 (students screaming) 389 00:14:20,320 --> 00:14:23,320 (suspenseful music) 390 00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:30,760 (lasers zapping) 391 00:14:30,770 --> 00:14:34,170 (audience laughing) 392 00:14:34,170 --> 00:14:35,140 - I love this job. 393 00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:39,910 (chiming) 394 00:14:39,910 --> 00:14:40,940 - I can do it, Mr. Dewey, 395 00:14:40,940 --> 00:14:43,010 you can count on Screech Powers. 396 00:14:43,010 --> 00:14:44,510 - I'm deeply moved. 397 00:14:44,510 --> 00:14:47,080 In case you need it, I'm giving you the power 398 00:14:47,080 --> 00:14:50,250 to send all lawbreakers directly to detention. 399 00:14:50,250 --> 00:14:52,850 (bell ringing) 400 00:14:56,760 --> 00:14:58,160 Mr. Dewey, the bell has rung. 401 00:14:58,160 --> 00:14:59,830 You should be in class. 402 00:14:59,830 --> 00:15:02,730 (audience laughing) 403 00:15:03,830 --> 00:15:05,430 Here's your late slip. 404 00:15:05,430 --> 00:15:06,430 (audience laughing) 405 00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:08,200 - You're firm but fair. 406 00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:09,700 (audience laughing) 407 00:15:09,710 --> 00:15:12,270 (upbeat music) 408 00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:15,210 - You guys, we're running out of time. 409 00:15:15,210 --> 00:15:16,880 When are you going to decorate? 410 00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:18,550 - We already did. 411 00:15:18,550 --> 00:15:20,580 (audience laughing) 412 00:15:20,580 --> 00:15:22,320 - Festive. 413 00:15:22,320 --> 00:15:24,390 - Just trust us, when the party starts, 414 00:15:24,390 --> 00:15:26,190 you'll say wow guys this place looks great. 415 00:15:26,190 --> 00:15:27,020 - Yeah. 416 00:15:27,020 --> 00:15:28,560 - Well it better be soon 417 00:15:28,560 --> 00:15:30,460 because Lisa and Kelly went to The Max to get the cake. 418 00:15:30,460 --> 00:15:32,730 Oh and I'll be right back with the recyclable paper plates 419 00:15:32,730 --> 00:15:34,660 and biodegradable plastic spoons. 420 00:15:34,660 --> 00:15:36,400 (audience laughing) 421 00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:37,330 (upbeat music) 422 00:15:37,330 --> 00:15:39,830 - What is taking Jessie so long? 423 00:15:39,840 --> 00:15:43,370 - Well knowing her, she probably stopped to save a whale. 424 00:15:43,370 --> 00:15:45,410 (audience laughing) 425 00:15:45,410 --> 00:15:46,940 - Where is she? 426 00:15:46,940 --> 00:15:48,640 And Kelly and Lisa should have been here by now too. 427 00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:50,540 Belding will be back any minute 428 00:15:50,550 --> 00:15:51,880 and the ice cream will melt. 429 00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:53,480 How are we going to have a party? 430 00:15:53,480 --> 00:15:56,180 - Hey, pull yourself together Preppy. 431 00:15:56,190 --> 00:15:57,220 You're whining. 432 00:15:57,220 --> 00:15:59,250 (audience laughing) 433 00:15:59,260 --> 00:16:01,520 - It's my party and I'll whine if I want to. 434 00:16:01,520 --> 00:16:04,260 (audience laughing) 435 00:16:04,260 --> 00:16:07,130 - You're making Jessie look better every minute. 436 00:16:07,130 --> 00:16:07,960 (audience laughing) 437 00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:09,060 Look, I'll go find her. 438 00:16:09,070 --> 00:16:10,230 - Yeah. - Okay? 439 00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:15,970 - Oh Screech, have you seen Jessie? 440 00:16:15,970 --> 00:16:17,670 - Yeah, she's in detention 441 00:16:17,670 --> 00:16:19,470 and you'll be there too. 442 00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:22,110 Unless you show me your hall pass. 443 00:16:22,110 --> 00:16:23,340 - What? 444 00:16:23,350 --> 00:16:25,680 - You heard me, let me see your pass. 445 00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:28,350 - I don't have one. 446 00:16:28,350 --> 00:16:30,220 - All right, against the lockers. 447 00:16:31,350 --> 00:16:32,220 Spread 'em! 448 00:16:32,220 --> 00:16:35,220 (audience laughing) 449 00:16:36,590 --> 00:16:38,530 - (laughs) Hey cut it out, that tickles. 450 00:16:38,530 --> 00:16:40,690 (audience laughing) 451 00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:43,200 - Pipe down, don't make me hurt ya. 452 00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:46,730 - Oh yeah, you and who else? 453 00:16:46,740 --> 00:16:47,800 - My deputy. 454 00:16:48,700 --> 00:16:51,710 (audience laughing) 455 00:16:53,810 --> 00:16:55,640 - Now Screech, you don't know what you're doing. 456 00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:56,740 - Yeah I do. 457 00:16:56,750 --> 00:16:58,210 I got to go do more of it. 458 00:16:59,150 --> 00:17:00,880 (audience laughing) 459 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:02,480 - You better watch it, Slater, 460 00:17:02,490 --> 00:17:05,690 he's still bummed out about his birthday. 461 00:17:05,690 --> 00:17:08,290 (somber music) 462 00:17:10,790 --> 00:17:12,630 (upbeat music) 463 00:17:12,630 --> 00:17:14,900 (knocking) 464 00:17:16,630 --> 00:17:18,930 (audience laughing) 465 00:17:18,930 --> 00:17:20,100 - What's the password? 466 00:17:20,100 --> 00:17:22,640 - Come on Zack, open the door. 467 00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:24,070 - Now that's not it. 468 00:17:24,070 --> 00:17:25,410 - Better say it. 469 00:17:27,210 --> 00:17:30,680 - Zack Morris is the most awesome guy in the world. 470 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:34,850 He is so hot, I just want to be with him forever, okay? 471 00:17:34,850 --> 00:17:36,920 - Hey you missed stud muffin, close enough. 472 00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:39,520 (audience laughing) 473 00:17:39,520 --> 00:17:41,020 Come on, come on, come on. 474 00:17:41,020 --> 00:17:43,260 - Zack, that is the dumbest password I've ever heard. 475 00:17:43,260 --> 00:17:45,790 - Hey you're just jealous because you didn't get to say it. 476 00:17:45,790 --> 00:17:48,060 (audience laughing) 477 00:17:48,060 --> 00:17:49,600 - Where's Jessie and Slater? 478 00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:51,100 - We thought they were with you. 479 00:17:51,100 --> 00:17:53,200 - Oh great, that's half the guest list. 480 00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:54,440 You finish setting up here 481 00:17:54,440 --> 00:17:57,000 and we'll go find them, time is running out. 482 00:17:57,010 --> 00:17:58,670 - So is the ice cream. 483 00:17:58,670 --> 00:18:00,840 (audience laughing) 484 00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:01,680 Here. 485 00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:07,350 Okay, you hit the library and I'll check the cafeteria. 486 00:18:07,350 --> 00:18:08,180 - Got ya. 487 00:18:11,390 --> 00:18:13,020 - Well, well, well, aren't we in a hurry. 488 00:18:13,020 --> 00:18:14,250 - Screech. 489 00:18:14,260 --> 00:18:15,960 - I'm booking you up for speeding. 490 00:18:15,960 --> 00:18:17,420 (audience laughing) 491 00:18:17,430 --> 00:18:19,090 - Screech, aren't you taking this hall monitor thing 492 00:18:19,100 --> 00:18:20,930 a little too seriously? 493 00:18:20,930 --> 00:18:25,000 - Lady, some things you're supposed to take seriously, 494 00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:28,170 like remembering a loved one's birthday! 495 00:18:28,170 --> 00:18:30,070 (audience laughing) 496 00:18:30,070 --> 00:18:31,810 - You got influence, talk to him. 497 00:18:31,810 --> 00:18:33,010 - [Lisa] Must I? 498 00:18:33,010 --> 00:18:34,440 - Yes, and you know why. 499 00:18:36,850 --> 00:18:40,780 - Screech, you know how you're always asking me on a date 500 00:18:40,780 --> 00:18:42,450 and I always say no. 501 00:18:42,450 --> 00:18:43,720 - Yeah? 502 00:18:43,720 --> 00:18:45,620 - Well, maybe if you ask me this weekend, 503 00:18:45,620 --> 00:18:47,790 I just might give you a different answer. 504 00:18:47,790 --> 00:18:49,820 - You mean if I let you too go, you'll go out with me? 505 00:18:49,830 --> 00:18:52,830 (audience laughing) 506 00:18:55,160 --> 00:18:56,900 - Yes, hunk of mine. 507 00:18:56,900 --> 00:18:58,430 - Okay, that's it, Toots, 508 00:18:58,430 --> 00:19:00,570 bribing an officer on top of everything else. 509 00:19:00,570 --> 00:19:01,400 - But Screech! 510 00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:02,440 - You too, Sparkle Puss. 511 00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:04,300 Next stop, detention. 512 00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:11,280 - Hey Screech, you can't take them to detention. 513 00:19:11,280 --> 00:19:12,650 You'll ruin everything. 514 00:19:12,650 --> 00:19:14,520 - I'm the law of this town, Mr. 515 00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:16,050 I can do what I please. 516 00:19:16,050 --> 00:19:17,650 (audience laughing) 517 00:19:17,650 --> 00:19:20,220 (upbeat music) 518 00:19:21,790 --> 00:19:23,290 (audience laughing) 519 00:19:23,290 --> 00:19:24,790 - How are we going to get out of here and throw the party? 520 00:19:24,790 --> 00:19:27,630 - We're just going to have to make up some excuses. 521 00:19:27,630 --> 00:19:30,560 - Hey watch this. 522 00:19:30,570 --> 00:19:34,700 Mr. Dewey, I just remembered I left my gym locker open. 523 00:19:34,700 --> 00:19:37,140 You know, someone might take my wrestling jersey. 524 00:19:37,140 --> 00:19:38,610 Can I be excused? 525 00:19:38,610 --> 00:19:41,440 - Wrestle topless, it'll drive them wild. 526 00:19:41,440 --> 00:19:44,810 (audience laughing) 527 00:19:44,810 --> 00:19:47,180 - Mr. Dewey, I'm not feeling so well. 528 00:19:47,180 --> 00:19:49,450 Can some of my friends help me to the school nurse? 529 00:19:49,450 --> 00:19:50,980 - She's home sick. 530 00:19:50,990 --> 00:19:53,050 I wish I were, sit down. 531 00:19:53,060 --> 00:19:54,350 (audience laughing) 532 00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:56,790 - Mr. Dewey, we don't belong here. 533 00:19:56,790 --> 00:19:58,260 - That's what they all say. 534 00:19:58,260 --> 00:20:00,560 (audience laughing) 535 00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:03,330 - Well that's it, the party's over. 536 00:20:03,330 --> 00:20:06,370 (bell dinging) 537 00:20:06,370 --> 00:20:07,970 - This is Miss Johnson. 538 00:20:07,970 --> 00:20:09,900 Mr. Belding's secretary. 539 00:20:09,910 --> 00:20:11,240 Will the following students 540 00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:13,210 please report to the Principal's office immediately. 541 00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:15,680 - Miss Johnson? 542 00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:17,410 She must be new here. 543 00:20:17,410 --> 00:20:18,510 - I'm new here. 544 00:20:18,510 --> 00:20:20,850 So let me get these names right. 545 00:20:20,850 --> 00:20:25,850 Jessie Spano, A.C. Slater, Lisa Turtle, Kelly Kapowski, 546 00:20:26,590 --> 00:20:28,760 and, uh, Screech Powers. 547 00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:30,990 - You heard her, clear out. 548 00:20:30,990 --> 00:20:34,460 The rest of you can watch me practice my tae kwon do. 549 00:20:34,460 --> 00:20:36,130 (audience laughing) 550 00:20:36,130 --> 00:20:38,830 (Mr. Dewey grunting) 551 00:20:38,830 --> 00:20:40,170 (audience laughing) 552 00:20:40,170 --> 00:20:42,700 (upbeat music) 553 00:20:43,870 --> 00:20:46,410 - Ah come on in, I'm good, aren't I? 554 00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:48,740 Come on, give me five. 555 00:20:48,740 --> 00:20:50,380 - Save it Preppy. 556 00:20:50,380 --> 00:20:53,280 We just saw Belding's car pulling in to the parking lot. 557 00:20:53,280 --> 00:20:56,320 - After all this we don't even have time for a party. 558 00:20:56,320 --> 00:20:58,320 - Yes we do, just not a long one. 559 00:20:59,320 --> 00:21:02,260 (audience laughing) 560 00:21:05,030 --> 00:21:06,860 - All right, where's Mr. Belding? 561 00:21:06,860 --> 00:21:10,100 - Look Screech, we're sorry we forgot about your birthday. 562 00:21:10,100 --> 00:21:12,400 - And we're even sorrier we made you hall monitor. 563 00:21:12,400 --> 00:21:13,970 (audience laughing) 564 00:21:13,970 --> 00:21:15,030 - But you're still our friend. 565 00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:15,970 - So. 566 00:21:15,970 --> 00:21:17,000 - Surprise! 567 00:21:17,010 --> 00:21:18,200 - [All] Happy Birthday! 568 00:21:18,210 --> 00:21:19,610 - All right, Screech. 569 00:21:19,610 --> 00:21:22,210 (upbeat music) 570 00:21:32,120 --> 00:21:33,550 - Oh, I love it. 571 00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:35,220 (audience laughing) 572 00:21:35,220 --> 00:21:37,620 (upbeat music) 573 00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:39,560 - You guys are giving me a birthday party 574 00:21:39,560 --> 00:21:41,400 after I put you all in detention? 575 00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:43,260 - Well Screech, we love ya. 576 00:21:43,270 --> 00:21:45,970 - If I had the right circuits, I'd cry. 577 00:21:45,970 --> 00:21:47,600 (audience laughing) 578 00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:50,340 - Sorry I let being hall monitor go to my head. 579 00:21:50,340 --> 00:21:52,110 You guys are the best friends a guy could ever-- 580 00:21:52,110 --> 00:21:53,470 - Shut up, Screech, there's no time. 581 00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:54,470 - All right. 582 00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:55,480 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 583 00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:56,480 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 584 00:21:56,480 --> 00:21:57,480 ♪ Happy birthday dear Screech ♪ 585 00:21:57,480 --> 00:21:58,310 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 586 00:21:58,310 --> 00:21:59,110 (audience laughing) 587 00:21:59,110 --> 00:22:00,050 - Quick, make a wish. 588 00:22:00,050 --> 00:22:01,210 - There aren't any candles. 589 00:22:01,220 --> 00:22:02,220 - That's right, then don't make a wish. 590 00:22:02,220 --> 00:22:03,480 - Ooh, that cake looks delicious. 591 00:22:03,490 --> 00:22:04,320 - Oh it is. 592 00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:05,190 - Trust us. 593 00:22:05,190 --> 00:22:06,020 - And gifts. 594 00:22:06,020 --> 00:22:06,850 - Yes. 595 00:22:06,860 --> 00:22:09,560 (audience laughing) 596 00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:10,590 - All right, Screech. 597 00:22:10,590 --> 00:22:11,690 This is from me. 598 00:22:11,690 --> 00:22:12,990 - Ooh, I wonder what it is? 599 00:22:12,990 --> 00:22:14,260 - It's a chemistry set. 600 00:22:14,260 --> 00:22:15,160 - A sweater. 601 00:22:15,160 --> 00:22:16,000 - A pair of sunglasses. 602 00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:17,260 - A calculator. 603 00:22:17,270 --> 00:22:18,700 - A compass for when I tell you to get lost. 604 00:22:18,700 --> 00:22:20,870 (audience laughing) 605 00:22:20,870 --> 00:22:22,100 - I bet they were beautiful. 606 00:22:22,100 --> 00:22:24,040 - Okay that's it, let's clean up. 607 00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:26,640 (upbeat music) 608 00:22:33,880 --> 00:22:36,720 - Wow, I don't know what to say. 609 00:22:38,150 --> 00:22:40,120 - Oh good, we don't have time to hear it. (laughs) 610 00:22:40,120 --> 00:22:42,690 (upbeat music) 611 00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:52,070 (upbeat music) 41515

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