All language subtitles for Guys.with.Kids.S01E10.Christmas.1080p.NBC.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.x264-DEGEN_track3_[eng]

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt-PT Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,873 --> 00:00:08,341 - guys with kidsis taped in 2 00:00:06,873 --> 00:00:08,341 Front of a live studio audience. 3 00:00:08,375 --> 00:00:09,843 - hey! Hey... 4 00:00:09,876 --> 00:00:12,379 Babe, the place looks great 5 00:00:09,876 --> 00:00:12,379 For your parents' visit. 6 00:00:12,412 --> 00:00:13,580 Wow. 7 00:00:13,613 --> 00:00:14,814 Got your mom some flowers. 8 00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:16,816 She loves me. 9 00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:16,816 Ha ha. 10 00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:19,119 She did a painting of me 11 00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:19,119 In her art class. 12 00:00:19,152 --> 00:00:23,189 She called it "My sugar." 13 00:00:23,223 --> 00:00:25,225 - oh, I know. 14 00:00:25,258 --> 00:00:26,860 But unfortunately, 15 00:00:25,258 --> 00:00:26,860 My mom's not gonna be able 16 00:00:26,893 --> 00:00:28,194 To make it this time. 17 00:00:28,228 --> 00:00:30,597 - what? 18 00:00:28,228 --> 00:00:30,597 No vivian? 19 00:00:30,630 --> 00:00:33,233 But your dad is receiving 20 00:00:30,630 --> 00:00:33,233 An award from his law school. 21 00:00:33,266 --> 00:00:35,350 How--how could 22 00:00:33,266 --> 00:00:35,350 She do this to him? 23 00:00:35,680 --> 00:00:37,404 And me? 24 00:00:37,437 --> 00:00:41,410 You know I can't handle 25 00:00:37,437 --> 00:00:41,410 Your father without your mother. 26 00:00:41,740 --> 00:00:42,742 - gary, I don't know 27 00:00:41,740 --> 00:00:42,742 How many times 28 00:00:42,776 --> 00:00:44,411 I have to tell you this, 29 00:00:42,776 --> 00:00:44,411 Baby. 30 00:00:44,444 --> 00:00:46,120 My dad loves you. 31 00:00:46,460 --> 00:00:48,848 It's all in your head, 32 00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:50,850 Like how you think 33 00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:50,850 The gap purposefully makes jeans 34 00:00:50,884 --> 00:00:53,219 That don't look good on you. 35 00:00:53,253 --> 00:00:55,455 - baby, whenever 36 00:00:53,253 --> 00:00:55,455 I'm with your father 37 00:00:55,488 --> 00:00:57,223 I can feel his contempt. 38 00:00:57,257 --> 00:00:58,725 Then I get self-conscious, 39 00:00:58,758 --> 00:01:00,593 And then my hands 40 00:00:58,758 --> 00:01:00,593 Start moving around 41 00:01:00,627 --> 00:01:04,263 Like they took a tai chi class 42 00:01:00,627 --> 00:01:04,263 And didn't tell me about it. 43 00:01:04,297 --> 00:01:08,680 Where's vivian? 44 00:01:04,297 --> 00:01:08,680 How could she do this to me? 45 00:01:08,101 --> 00:01:09,602 Vivian! 46 00:01:09,636 --> 00:01:12,172 - see, right there. 47 00:01:09,636 --> 00:01:12,172 That's the problem. 48 00:01:12,205 --> 00:01:13,406 - what? 49 00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:15,675 - you're always hiding 50 00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:15,675 Behind my mom. 51 00:01:15,709 --> 00:01:18,845 You've never really made 52 00:01:15,709 --> 00:01:18,845 An effort to connect with him. 53 00:01:18,878 --> 00:01:21,214 He has a lot 54 00:01:18,878 --> 00:01:21,214 Of great interests. 55 00:01:21,247 --> 00:01:22,549 He loves boats, 56 00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:24,783 Anything to do 57 00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:24,783 With the space program. 58 00:01:24,818 --> 00:01:28,188 Baby, this is 59 00:01:24,818 --> 00:01:28,188 The perfect opportunity 60 00:01:28,221 --> 00:01:29,889 For you two to bond. 61 00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:31,890 My dad's got 62 00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:31,890 A tough demeanor, yes, 63 00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:35,895 But underneath all that 64 00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:35,895 He's a sweetheart. 65 00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:38,264 - all right, how long 66 00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:38,264 Is he coming for? 67 00:01:38,298 --> 00:01:39,499 - five days. 68 00:01:39,532 --> 00:01:41,801 - five days! 69 00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:44,604 Vivian! 70 00:01:44,637 --> 00:01:47,774 - * why would you walk 71 00:01:44,637 --> 00:01:47,774 When you can run? * 72 00:01:47,807 --> 00:01:49,342 - * everybody singin' * 73 00:01:49,376 --> 00:01:52,245 - * why would you walk 74 00:01:49,376 --> 00:01:52,245 When you can run? * 75 00:01:53,913 --> 00:01:55,882 - I've come to return 76 00:01:53,913 --> 00:01:55,882 Your jogging stroller. 77 00:01:55,914 --> 00:02:00,887 It turns out our clothes dry 78 00:01:55,914 --> 00:02:00,887 Much faster on the treadmill. 79 00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:03,656 - how was your date 80 00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:03,656 The other day? 81 00:02:03,690 --> 00:02:04,791 Was she aggressive? 82 00:02:04,824 --> 00:02:05,959 'cause I hear single girls 83 00:02:06,590 --> 00:02:08,595 Are really aggressive 84 00:02:06,590 --> 00:02:08,595 These days. 85 00:02:08,627 --> 00:02:12,932 - how come you never ask me 86 00:02:08,627 --> 00:02:12,932 About my dates? 87 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:14,434 - actually, 88 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:14,434 She bailed on me, 89 00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:16,636 But I already had the tickets, 90 00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:16,636 So I took-- 91 00:02:16,670 --> 00:02:17,971 - me. 92 00:02:18,710 --> 00:02:19,673 - no! 93 00:02:19,706 --> 00:02:22,308 Chris, when it scratches 94 00:02:19,706 --> 00:02:22,308 On the door, 95 00:02:22,341 --> 00:02:25,278 You're not supposed 96 00:02:22,341 --> 00:02:25,278 To let it in. 97 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,149 - you make marshmallows 98 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,149 Look tan. 99 00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:36,289 - your ex-wife was your date 100 00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:36,289 To the concert? 101 00:02:36,322 --> 00:02:37,857 - relax, it was not a date. 102 00:02:37,891 --> 00:02:39,459 - yeah, definitely not. 103 00:02:39,492 --> 00:02:40,793 - did you share a cab? 104 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:42,162 - we live 105 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:42,162 In the same building. 106 00:02:42,195 --> 00:02:43,363 - did you take her to dinner? 107 00:02:43,396 --> 00:02:44,631 - we both had to eat. 108 00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:45,965 - did you walk her 109 00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:45,965 To her door? 110 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,867 - uh... 111 00:02:47,901 --> 00:02:51,171 - did you or did you not 112 00:02:47,901 --> 00:02:51,171 Walk her to her door? 113 00:02:51,204 --> 00:02:54,174 - oh, my god! 114 00:02:51,204 --> 00:02:54,174 - we went on a date! 115 00:02:54,207 --> 00:02:55,841 - why would you guys 116 00:02:54,207 --> 00:02:55,841 Do that? 117 00:02:55,875 --> 00:02:57,344 - I don't know. 118 00:02:55,875 --> 00:02:57,344 It wasn't intentional. 119 00:02:57,377 --> 00:02:58,878 Dating is hard. 120 00:02:58,912 --> 00:03:01,314 - yeah, 121 00:02:58,912 --> 00:03:01,314 Men are intimidated by me. 122 00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:02,949 Is it my brains? 123 00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:02,949 My courage? 124 00:03:03,490 --> 00:03:06,152 Both? 125 00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:08,154 - okay, chris, 126 00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:08,154 Let us set you up. 127 00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:10,890 - yes, 128 00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:10,890 We are great matchmakers. 129 00:03:10,924 --> 00:03:13,560 Oh, and, sheila, we might know 130 00:03:10,924 --> 00:03:13,560 Someone for you too. 131 00:03:13,593 --> 00:03:15,395 - oh, that's nice, 132 00:03:13,593 --> 00:03:15,395 But I don't know 133 00:03:15,428 --> 00:03:19,650 How you would know 134 00:03:15,428 --> 00:03:19,650 Someone I'd like. 135 00:03:19,650 --> 00:03:20,667 - you already tried this 136 00:03:19,650 --> 00:03:20,667 In college, nick. 137 00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:22,680 You set me up five times. 138 00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:24,738 Each time, the woman 139 00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:24,738 Was well over 6 feet tall. 140 00:03:24,771 --> 00:03:26,206 - those were jokes. 141 00:03:26,239 --> 00:03:27,974 They were joke dates. 142 00:03:28,740 --> 00:03:29,309 And you gotta admit, 143 00:03:29,341 --> 00:03:32,846 As they got taller, 144 00:03:29,341 --> 00:03:32,846 It got funnier. 145 00:03:34,514 --> 00:03:35,582 - all right, 146 00:03:34,514 --> 00:03:35,582 This is serious. 147 00:03:35,615 --> 00:03:37,829 We will not let you down. 148 00:03:37,829 --> 00:03:41,488 - okay, but nobody 149 00:03:37,829 --> 00:03:41,488 Over 6'5" this time, got it? 150 00:03:41,521 --> 00:03:42,922 - I mean, quite honestly, 151 00:03:42,956 --> 00:03:45,525 If it's funny, 152 00:03:42,956 --> 00:03:45,525 I'm gonna do it. 153 00:03:48,940 --> 00:03:50,430 - grandpa, I feel it. 154 00:03:48,940 --> 00:03:50,430 I feel the bullet. 155 00:03:50,463 --> 00:03:51,765 - me too. 156 00:03:51,798 --> 00:03:53,600 Why did that man shoot you? 157 00:03:53,633 --> 00:03:54,768 - a couple of reasons. 158 00:03:54,801 --> 00:03:56,369 I'm a judge, 159 00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:58,400 And someone unplugged 160 00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:58,400 The metal detector 161 00:03:58,103 --> 00:04:01,441 So they could charge 162 00:03:58,103 --> 00:04:01,441 Their iphone. 163 00:04:01,474 --> 00:04:03,810 - aunt emily, 164 00:04:01,474 --> 00:04:03,810 You have to feel the bullet. 165 00:04:03,843 --> 00:04:07,470 Come on, do it! 166 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:09,382 - oh, that's so cool! 167 00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:11,510 - look at him, 168 00:04:11,510 --> 00:04:13,520 Letting our friends 169 00:04:11,510 --> 00:04:13,520 Touch his leg. 170 00:04:13,553 --> 00:04:15,522 There's nothing 171 00:04:13,553 --> 00:04:15,522 To be afraid of. 172 00:04:15,555 --> 00:04:17,457 You said you would 173 00:04:15,555 --> 00:04:17,457 Talk to him. 174 00:04:17,490 --> 00:04:20,427 Talk to him. 175 00:04:20,459 --> 00:04:25,432 - so, judge, you pick up 176 00:04:20,459 --> 00:04:25,432 That new boating magazine? 177 00:04:25,465 --> 00:04:28,435 You know, there's a-- 178 00:04:25,465 --> 00:04:28,435 There's a big article in there 179 00:04:28,468 --> 00:04:33,730 About, uh... 180 00:04:28,468 --> 00:04:33,730 Um, boats. 181 00:04:33,730 --> 00:04:34,441 - huh? 182 00:04:34,474 --> 00:04:36,943 - nothing. 183 00:04:36,976 --> 00:04:38,712 - what was that? 184 00:04:38,745 --> 00:04:41,810 - I promised her I'd make 185 00:04:38,745 --> 00:04:41,810 An effort towards her father 186 00:04:41,810 --> 00:04:42,549 Even though 187 00:04:41,810 --> 00:04:42,549 I know he hates me. 188 00:04:42,582 --> 00:04:44,417 - he doesn't hate you. 189 00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:47,870 Guys, would you please 190 00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:47,870 Talk some sense into him? 191 00:04:47,870 --> 00:04:49,890 - oh, yeah, I mean, 192 00:04:47,870 --> 00:04:49,890 Marny's right, 193 00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:50,790 The judge is great. 194 00:04:50,824 --> 00:04:52,625 He sent me a birthday card. 195 00:04:50,824 --> 00:04:52,625 It said "Have a good one." 196 00:04:52,659 --> 00:04:56,960 And I did, 197 00:04:52,659 --> 00:04:56,960 Thanks to that card. 198 00:04:56,960 --> 00:05:00,533 - okay, I got this. 199 00:05:00,567 --> 00:05:01,668 All right. 200 00:05:01,701 --> 00:05:03,870 Uh... 201 00:05:03,903 --> 00:05:06,539 How 'bout that guy 202 00:05:03,903 --> 00:05:06,539 That jumped from outer space? 203 00:05:06,573 --> 00:05:09,843 - what guy is that, gary? 204 00:05:09,876 --> 00:05:13,113 - uh, you know, the guy-- 205 00:05:09,876 --> 00:05:13,113 He, uh... 206 00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,848 You know, he went up 207 00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,848 On that balloon, 208 00:05:14,881 --> 00:05:17,283 And he just went up 209 00:05:14,881 --> 00:05:17,283 And then... 210 00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:20,120 Pffft. 211 00:05:20,153 --> 00:05:21,921 - he wasn't in space. 212 00:05:21,955 --> 00:05:23,690 He was at the edge 213 00:05:21,955 --> 00:05:23,690 Of the atmosphere. 214 00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:25,580 If he had been in space, 215 00:05:25,580 --> 00:05:27,660 He would have floated away, 216 00:05:25,580 --> 00:05:27,660 Right? 217 00:05:30,697 --> 00:05:33,133 - uh, yeah. 218 00:05:30,697 --> 00:05:33,133 Yeah, I guess. 219 00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:34,534 Uh... 220 00:05:34,567 --> 00:05:37,671 Houston, 221 00:05:34,567 --> 00:05:37,671 We have a problem. 222 00:05:37,704 --> 00:05:39,339 That's space talk, right? 223 00:05:39,372 --> 00:05:43,576 You ever been to houston? 224 00:05:39,372 --> 00:05:43,576 I hear it's muggy. 225 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:50,316 - uh, come on, baby. 226 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:50,316 Let's go check on dinner. 227 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:54,621 Let's not hit him with 228 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:54,621 Too much gary all at once. 229 00:05:54,654 --> 00:05:57,900 - chris, since 230 00:05:54,654 --> 00:05:57,900 The last time I saw you, 231 00:05:57,900 --> 00:05:58,491 I hear you made partner. 232 00:05:58,525 --> 00:05:59,859 - yeah, that's true. 233 00:05:59,893 --> 00:06:02,362 And not to brag, but I am 234 00:05:59,893 --> 00:06:02,362 The 37th-youngest person 235 00:06:02,395 --> 00:06:04,640 At my firm to have done so. 236 00:06:04,970 --> 00:06:06,366 - a lawyer 237 00:06:04,970 --> 00:06:06,366 And a commercial director. 238 00:06:06,399 --> 00:06:08,535 Because of that ad 239 00:06:06,399 --> 00:06:08,535 You made, nick, 240 00:06:08,568 --> 00:06:10,804 I switched from soap 241 00:06:08,568 --> 00:06:10,804 To body wash. 242 00:06:10,837 --> 00:06:12,739 - I'm just glad 243 00:06:10,837 --> 00:06:12,739 You're thinking about me 244 00:06:12,772 --> 00:06:15,742 In the shower, judge. 245 00:06:15,775 --> 00:06:18,378 - well, you guys 246 00:06:15,775 --> 00:06:18,378 Are doing great. 247 00:06:18,411 --> 00:06:20,680 Professional, 248 00:06:18,411 --> 00:06:20,680 Hardworking fathers. 249 00:06:20,714 --> 00:06:22,615 - well, we take 250 00:06:20,714 --> 00:06:22,615 Our inspiration from gary. 251 00:06:22,649 --> 00:06:25,151 Hardest-working father 252 00:06:22,649 --> 00:06:25,151 We know. 253 00:06:25,185 --> 00:06:27,870 - that was an amazing segue. 254 00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:30,190 I was working on something. 255 00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:30,190 You got there in one move. 256 00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:32,392 - I hear there's water 257 00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:32,392 On mars now, 258 00:06:32,425 --> 00:06:34,961 So I guess 259 00:06:32,425 --> 00:06:34,961 They'll be needing boats. 260 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:43,536 - ten years 261 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:43,536 And I still don't get him. 262 00:06:43,570 --> 00:06:45,105 Just one time, 263 00:06:43,570 --> 00:06:45,105 I'd like to visit 264 00:06:45,138 --> 00:06:47,974 Without that guy 265 00:06:45,138 --> 00:06:47,974 Staring at me. 266 00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:54,647 - sir, if I could 267 00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:54,647 Be honest with you, 268 00:06:54,681 --> 00:06:57,851 I think that gary's 269 00:06:54,681 --> 00:06:57,851 Just nervous around you. 270 00:06:57,884 --> 00:06:59,519 He's got this crazy idea 271 00:06:57,884 --> 00:06:59,519 In his head 272 00:06:59,552 --> 00:07:02,756 That for some reason, 273 00:06:59,552 --> 00:07:02,756 You just don't like him. 274 00:07:02,789 --> 00:07:05,592 - he's right. 275 00:07:02,789 --> 00:07:05,592 I don't like him. 276 00:07:05,625 --> 00:07:08,280 - you don't? 277 00:07:05,625 --> 00:07:08,280 - I just don't respect him. 278 00:07:08,280 --> 00:07:09,796 - but, sir, 279 00:07:08,280 --> 00:07:09,796 Gary is an amazing-- 280 00:07:09,829 --> 00:07:11,598 - ah, don't try 281 00:07:09,829 --> 00:07:11,598 And change my mind. 282 00:07:11,631 --> 00:07:13,733 It was my job for 30 years 283 00:07:11,631 --> 00:07:13,733 To judge people. 284 00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:15,802 I know what I'm doing. 285 00:07:15,835 --> 00:07:19,439 My verdict on gary: 286 00:07:15,835 --> 00:07:19,439 He's not much of a man. 287 00:07:19,472 --> 00:07:21,141 - now how can you say that? 288 00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:24,177 - all right, who's hungry? 289 00:07:32,218 --> 00:07:34,788 - my dad actually said 290 00:07:32,218 --> 00:07:34,788 That he doesn't like gary? 291 00:07:34,821 --> 00:07:38,825 - and has no respect 292 00:07:34,821 --> 00:07:38,825 For him. None. 293 00:07:38,858 --> 00:07:41,261 What? 294 00:07:38,858 --> 00:07:41,261 That's the new information. 295 00:07:41,294 --> 00:07:42,629 - that can't be right. 296 00:07:42,662 --> 00:07:44,597 - it is right. 297 00:07:42,662 --> 00:07:44,597 - no. 298 00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:46,599 - you have a blind spot 299 00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:46,599 Where your father's concerned. 300 00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,601 He can do no wrong 301 00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,601 In your eyes. 302 00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:51,710 Other people shoot him, 303 00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:51,710 You know? 304 00:07:51,104 --> 00:07:53,473 - he cannot treat you 305 00:07:51,104 --> 00:07:53,473 This way. 306 00:07:53,506 --> 00:07:55,675 I'm going over 307 00:07:53,506 --> 00:07:55,675 To his hotel room right now 308 00:07:55,709 --> 00:07:57,243 To set him straight. 309 00:07:57,277 --> 00:07:58,812 - oh, yeah, 310 00:07:57,277 --> 00:07:58,812 He'll respect me more 311 00:07:58,845 --> 00:08:00,380 If you run over there 312 00:07:58,845 --> 00:08:00,380 And tell pop-pop 313 00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:02,449 He made a boo-boo 314 00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:02,449 On my feelings. 315 00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:04,184 All right, you know, 316 00:08:04,217 --> 00:08:07,120 I'd love to see him handle 317 00:08:04,217 --> 00:08:07,120 Four screaming kids. 318 00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:08,488 - now there's an idea. 319 00:08:08,521 --> 00:08:10,457 Stick him with all four 320 00:08:08,521 --> 00:08:10,457 Of your kids for ten minutes, 321 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:11,825 He's gonna want to take 322 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:11,825 That bullet out of his leg 323 00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:15,462 And put it in his head. 324 00:08:17,764 --> 00:08:20,500 - I am telling you, 325 00:08:17,764 --> 00:08:20,500 Jess from my spin class 326 00:08:20,533 --> 00:08:22,680 Is the perfect girl 327 00:08:20,533 --> 00:08:22,680 For chris. 328 00:08:22,102 --> 00:08:25,672 They both say things 329 00:08:22,102 --> 00:08:25,672 Are "Too funny." 330 00:08:25,705 --> 00:08:27,874 - I already have 331 00:08:25,705 --> 00:08:27,874 The perfect girl for chris, 332 00:08:27,907 --> 00:08:29,609 Erica from work. 333 00:08:29,642 --> 00:08:32,479 And why would your erica 334 00:08:29,642 --> 00:08:32,479 Be better than my jess? 335 00:08:32,511 --> 00:08:34,481 Jess drives a car 336 00:08:32,511 --> 00:08:34,481 That runs on vegetable oil. 337 00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:37,751 That is very interesting. 338 00:08:37,784 --> 00:08:39,452 - because I have a gift. 339 00:08:39,486 --> 00:08:42,155 Admit it, I am the real 340 00:08:39,486 --> 00:08:42,155 Matchmaker between us. 341 00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:43,556 - where did 342 00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:43,556 You get that from? 343 00:08:47,560 --> 00:08:50,730 - ahh! 344 00:08:50,764 --> 00:08:52,766 Ahh! 345 00:08:52,799 --> 00:08:54,534 - okay, you think 346 00:08:52,799 --> 00:08:54,534 It's all you? 347 00:08:54,567 --> 00:08:57,637 How 'bout we set chris up 348 00:08:54,567 --> 00:08:57,637 With both jess and erica 349 00:08:57,671 --> 00:08:59,372 And see how each date goes? 350 00:08:59,406 --> 00:09:02,442 Then we can determine 351 00:08:59,406 --> 00:09:02,442 Who the real matchmaker is. 352 00:09:02,475 --> 00:09:04,544 - oh, it's on. 353 00:09:02,475 --> 00:09:04,544 What are the rules? 354 00:09:04,577 --> 00:09:05,812 - two identical dates. 355 00:09:05,845 --> 00:09:07,480 Same restaurant, 356 00:09:05,845 --> 00:09:07,480 Same table, same seats. 357 00:09:07,514 --> 00:09:09,282 We attend both. 358 00:09:09,315 --> 00:09:11,184 - chris pays. 359 00:09:09,315 --> 00:09:11,184 We're lending him our talent. 360 00:09:11,217 --> 00:09:12,652 - absolutely. 361 00:09:12,686 --> 00:09:14,688 If the date 362 00:09:12,686 --> 00:09:14,688 Touches his arm, 363 00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:15,555 That's two points. 364 00:09:15,588 --> 00:09:17,691 - oh, a point structure. 365 00:09:15,588 --> 00:09:17,691 I like that. 366 00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,226 - if she touches his leg, 367 00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,226 That's five points. 368 00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:22,262 First base, 15. 369 00:09:22,295 --> 00:09:23,897 - ooh. 370 00:09:23,930 --> 00:09:26,900 How many points would 371 00:09:23,930 --> 00:09:26,900 Our first date have been? 372 00:09:26,933 --> 00:09:31,338 - like, 1,000. 373 00:09:31,371 --> 00:09:35,709 - eh, don't feel bad. 374 00:09:31,371 --> 00:09:35,709 We knew. 375 00:09:38,278 --> 00:09:39,546 - [laughs] 376 00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:42,315 Thank you so much 377 00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:42,315 For getting us together. 378 00:09:42,349 --> 00:09:45,452 - oh, it's just 379 00:09:42,349 --> 00:09:45,452 What a great matchmaker does. 380 00:09:45,485 --> 00:09:47,187 - I can't believe we both 381 00:09:45,485 --> 00:09:47,187 Went to camp oscawana. 382 00:09:47,220 --> 00:09:49,189 - who knew we had 383 00:09:47,220 --> 00:09:49,189 So much in common? 384 00:09:49,222 --> 00:09:51,591 - I did. 385 00:09:49,222 --> 00:09:51,591 I knew. 386 00:09:51,624 --> 00:09:53,526 Did you know chris' pants 387 00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:55,595 Are a blend 388 00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:55,595 Of wool and cashmere? 389 00:09:55,628 --> 00:09:57,597 - wow. 390 00:09:57,630 --> 00:10:01,601 - touched the knee. 391 00:09:57,630 --> 00:10:01,601 five points, moi. 392 00:10:01,634 --> 00:10:03,837 - did you know 393 00:10:01,634 --> 00:10:03,837 That chris has a kid 394 00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:05,538 That he loves 395 00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:05,538 More than anyone? 396 00:10:05,572 --> 00:10:07,841 Are you comfortable never being 397 00:10:05,572 --> 00:10:07,841 More than a distant second 398 00:10:07,874 --> 00:10:10,443 In his heart? 399 00:10:10,477 --> 00:10:12,846 - I get it. 400 00:10:10,477 --> 00:10:12,846 I'm a single parent too. 401 00:10:12,879 --> 00:10:15,348 My little cutie-pie's name 402 00:10:12,879 --> 00:10:15,348 Is doug. 403 00:10:15,382 --> 00:10:17,217 - oh, my son is ernie. 404 00:10:17,250 --> 00:10:18,518 How old is doug? 405 00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:20,587 - 41. 406 00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,223 - 41? 407 00:10:23,256 --> 00:10:25,425 - in cat years. 408 00:10:25,458 --> 00:10:26,893 - doug is a cat. 409 00:10:26,926 --> 00:10:29,496 - doug is a cat. 410 00:10:26,926 --> 00:10:29,496 Doug is a cat! 411 00:10:29,529 --> 00:10:30,797 Yes, that you think 412 00:10:29,529 --> 00:10:30,797 Is a baby. 413 00:10:30,830 --> 00:10:32,465 Okay, I love this. 414 00:10:32,499 --> 00:10:34,434 Yes, tell me everything 415 00:10:32,499 --> 00:10:34,434 About doug. 416 00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:36,336 Do you have pictures? 417 00:10:36,369 --> 00:10:37,637 - yes. 418 00:10:37,671 --> 00:10:39,239 Here's doug 419 00:10:37,671 --> 00:10:39,239 At the renaissance fair. 420 00:10:39,272 --> 00:10:41,675 - renaissance fair! 421 00:10:43,543 --> 00:10:45,645 - he's in 422 00:10:43,543 --> 00:10:45,645 A tiny suit of armor. 423 00:10:45,679 --> 00:10:48,448 - no! 424 00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:49,883 How many points is that? 425 00:10:49,915 --> 00:10:52,652 - negative ten. 426 00:10:49,915 --> 00:10:52,652 - negative ten. 427 00:10:52,686 --> 00:10:54,988 - meow, meow. 428 00:10:52,686 --> 00:10:54,988 Meow, meow. 429 00:10:55,210 --> 00:10:56,923 Meow, meow, meow. 430 00:10:56,956 --> 00:11:00,460 - there is no bottom 431 00:10:56,956 --> 00:11:00,460 In sight. 432 00:11:04,698 --> 00:11:07,634 - how long you gonna leave 433 00:11:04,698 --> 00:11:07,634 My dad alone with the kids? 434 00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:09,336 - uh, an hour should do it. 435 00:11:09,369 --> 00:11:11,671 - make it two. 436 00:11:11,705 --> 00:11:14,841 I wanna teach him 437 00:11:11,705 --> 00:11:14,841 No one hates my husband. 438 00:11:14,874 --> 00:11:16,676 - hmm. 439 00:11:16,710 --> 00:11:18,878 - except for natalie 440 00:11:16,710 --> 00:11:18,878 At the park. 441 00:11:18,912 --> 00:11:21,247 - hey, if you don't 442 00:11:18,912 --> 00:11:21,247 Discipline your child, 443 00:11:21,281 --> 00:11:22,615 I will do it for you. 444 00:11:22,649 --> 00:11:24,317 - all right. 445 00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:25,552 - mwah. 446 00:11:25,585 --> 00:11:27,687 [chuckles] 447 00:11:27,721 --> 00:11:32,359 So just me and you. 448 00:11:32,392 --> 00:11:34,828 Oh, no, I forgot. 449 00:11:34,861 --> 00:11:36,696 I thought we were gonna 450 00:11:34,861 --> 00:11:36,696 Have such a great time 451 00:11:36,730 --> 00:11:40,433 To talk about space boats, 452 00:11:40,467 --> 00:11:42,102 But I realize I have 453 00:11:40,467 --> 00:11:42,102 To get diapers for the kids, 454 00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:43,837 Which means I'm gonna have 455 00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:43,837 To take all four kids, 456 00:11:43,870 --> 00:11:45,705 And it's cold out, which means 457 00:11:43,870 --> 00:11:45,705 The kids will get sick, 458 00:11:45,739 --> 00:11:47,707 Then I'll get sick, 459 00:11:45,739 --> 00:11:47,707 Then marny gets sick, 460 00:11:47,741 --> 00:11:49,609 Then you'll get sick, 461 00:11:49,642 --> 00:11:53,613 And there's no solution 462 00:11:49,642 --> 00:11:53,613 To this problem. 463 00:11:53,646 --> 00:11:55,448 - you want me to babysit 464 00:11:53,646 --> 00:11:55,448 The kids for you? 465 00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:57,170 - you think 466 00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:57,170 You can handle that? 467 00:11:57,117 --> 00:11:59,486 - yes, I think 468 00:11:57,117 --> 00:11:59,486 I can handle it. 469 00:11:59,519 --> 00:12:02,550 - okay, great. 470 00:11:59,519 --> 00:12:02,550 There you go. 471 00:12:02,550 --> 00:12:04,724 Ah, come on, 472 00:12:02,550 --> 00:12:04,724 Let's go up there. 473 00:12:04,758 --> 00:12:07,727 And another one. 474 00:12:04,758 --> 00:12:07,727 Collect 'em all. 475 00:12:07,761 --> 00:12:09,729 All right, come over here 476 00:12:07,761 --> 00:12:09,729 And talk to my boys 477 00:12:09,763 --> 00:12:11,640 And let them know how 478 00:12:09,763 --> 00:12:11,640 I expect them to behave 479 00:12:11,640 --> 00:12:12,932 While I'm gone. 480 00:12:12,966 --> 00:12:15,468 Listen, boys, I'm leaving you 481 00:12:12,966 --> 00:12:15,468 Here with your grandfather, 482 00:12:15,502 --> 00:12:16,970 And this is 483 00:12:15,502 --> 00:12:16,970 What I need you to do. 484 00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:21,741 I'm gonna need you 485 00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:21,741 To eat all of this sugar. 486 00:12:21,775 --> 00:12:23,109 All right? 487 00:12:23,143 --> 00:12:24,844 I'm gonna need you to be 488 00:12:23,143 --> 00:12:24,844 On your worst behavior. 489 00:12:24,878 --> 00:12:26,713 I mean, I'm talking at 490 00:12:24,878 --> 00:12:26,713 Your cousin's baptism behavior. 491 00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:27,947 You got it? 492 00:12:27,981 --> 00:12:29,716 All right, eat up. 493 00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:32,752 All right. 494 00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:32,752 Oh, one last thing. 495 00:12:32,786 --> 00:12:34,354 These are bad 496 00:12:32,786 --> 00:12:34,354 For their teeth. 497 00:12:34,387 --> 00:12:35,689 [babies crying] 498 00:12:35,722 --> 00:12:37,590 - wait, wait, wait, gary. 499 00:12:37,624 --> 00:12:39,759 - sorry, diapers. 500 00:12:37,624 --> 00:12:39,759 Nope. Bye. 501 00:12:39,793 --> 00:12:40,894 Have fun! 502 00:12:40,927 --> 00:12:42,950 - whoo! 503 00:12:42,950 --> 00:12:43,763 [babies crying] 504 00:12:43,797 --> 00:12:46,499 - shh shh shh. 505 00:12:43,797 --> 00:12:46,499 - agh! 506 00:12:46,533 --> 00:12:47,867 [shouting] 507 00:12:52,405 --> 00:12:54,507 - all right, all right, 508 00:12:52,405 --> 00:12:54,507 Everybody calm down. 509 00:12:54,540 --> 00:12:57,277 Leave your grand-- 510 00:12:57,310 --> 00:12:58,378 What's going on? 511 00:12:58,411 --> 00:13:00,213 - nothing. 512 00:12:58,411 --> 00:13:00,213 Everything's fine. 513 00:13:00,246 --> 00:13:02,480 They've been 514 00:13:00,246 --> 00:13:02,480 On their best behavior. 515 00:13:02,820 --> 00:13:06,119 - you've been on your best 516 00:13:02,820 --> 00:13:06,119 Behavior with your grandpa? 517 00:13:06,152 --> 00:13:07,554 What did I tell you? 518 00:13:07,587 --> 00:13:09,556 - we're sorry, dad. 519 00:13:07,587 --> 00:13:09,556 We couldn't help it. 520 00:13:09,589 --> 00:13:12,125 Grandpa's the best. 521 00:13:12,158 --> 00:13:14,260 - you know what? 522 00:13:12,158 --> 00:13:14,260 I will deal with you two later. 523 00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:16,363 Come on, go. 524 00:13:16,396 --> 00:13:18,431 - what was that all about? 525 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:20,133 Why wouldn't you want them 526 00:13:20,166 --> 00:13:22,102 To be on their 527 00:13:20,166 --> 00:13:22,102 Best behavior with me? 528 00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:23,803 - all right, fine, 529 00:13:23,837 --> 00:13:26,406 Look, the truth is I wanted you 530 00:13:23,837 --> 00:13:26,406 To see how hard it was 531 00:13:26,439 --> 00:13:28,740 To be a stay-at-home dad. 532 00:13:28,108 --> 00:13:30,760 - why would you do that? 533 00:13:30,110 --> 00:13:31,411 - because 534 00:13:30,110 --> 00:13:31,411 You don't respect me 535 00:13:31,444 --> 00:13:33,780 Because I stay home 536 00:13:31,444 --> 00:13:33,780 While your daughter works. 537 00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:37,550 - wait, you think that's why 538 00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:37,550 I don't respect you? 539 00:13:37,584 --> 00:13:39,452 That's ridiculous. 540 00:13:39,486 --> 00:13:41,454 The reason 541 00:13:39,486 --> 00:13:41,454 I don't respect you 542 00:13:41,488 --> 00:13:45,325 Is because 543 00:13:41,488 --> 00:13:45,325 You don't respect me. 544 00:13:45,358 --> 00:13:46,826 - what? 545 00:13:45,358 --> 00:13:46,826 - you know what? 546 00:13:46,860 --> 00:13:48,461 Vivian never wanted me 547 00:13:46,860 --> 00:13:48,461 To say anything, 548 00:13:48,495 --> 00:13:52,980 But she's not here, 549 00:13:48,495 --> 00:13:52,980 So I'm just gonna do it. 550 00:13:52,980 --> 00:13:54,300 You never came to me 551 00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:58,104 And asked my permission 552 00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:58,104 To marry my daughter, 553 00:13:58,138 --> 00:14:00,106 Like a man should. 554 00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:02,542 How can I respect that? 555 00:14:02,575 --> 00:14:04,277 I'm going back 556 00:14:02,575 --> 00:14:04,277 To my hotel room 557 00:14:04,310 --> 00:14:07,147 And finish watching 558 00:14:04,310 --> 00:14:07,147 (500) days of summer. 559 00:14:11,885 --> 00:14:16,322 - I cannot believe you 560 00:14:11,885 --> 00:14:16,322 Survived a shark attack. 561 00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,158 - I've got 17 stitches 562 00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,158 Under here 563 00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:20,126 And another 30 564 00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:20,126 Behind the knee. 565 00:14:20,160 --> 00:14:21,327 - wow. 566 00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:22,862 - peek under the shirt. 567 00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:25,165 That's gotta be worth 568 00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:25,165 At least 40 points. 569 00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:27,867 - you know, I would just like 570 00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:27,867 To make a toast to nick 571 00:14:27,901 --> 00:14:29,602 For setting this all up. 572 00:14:29,636 --> 00:14:32,472 - a toast. 573 00:14:29,636 --> 00:14:32,472 Five points. 574 00:14:32,505 --> 00:14:34,374 Plus a dreamy look. 575 00:14:32,505 --> 00:14:34,374 That's another seven points. 576 00:14:34,407 --> 00:14:37,310 Times two 577 00:14:34,407 --> 00:14:37,310 For the combination. 578 00:14:37,344 --> 00:14:38,812 - um, erica, 579 00:14:37,344 --> 00:14:38,812 I have an extra ticket 580 00:14:38,845 --> 00:14:40,580 to go see book of mormon 581 00:14:38,845 --> 00:14:40,580 Next friday. 582 00:14:40,613 --> 00:14:42,515 I was wondering if you'd 583 00:14:40,613 --> 00:14:42,515 Like to come with me. 584 00:14:42,549 --> 00:14:46,453 - oh, um, well, thanks, 585 00:14:46,486 --> 00:14:47,454 But no. 586 00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:49,556 - oh. 587 00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:49,556 - what? 588 00:14:49,589 --> 00:14:52,492 - tonight was nice, and you 589 00:14:49,589 --> 00:14:52,492 Seem like a really great guy, 590 00:14:52,525 --> 00:14:54,361 But I'm just 591 00:14:52,525 --> 00:14:54,361 At that point in my life 592 00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,960 Where I'm getting 593 00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,960 A little older, 594 00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:57,530 And I don't wanna waste time 595 00:14:57,564 --> 00:14:59,466 And talk myself 596 00:14:57,564 --> 00:14:59,466 Into things I don't want. 597 00:14:59,499 --> 00:15:02,302 And the truth is, 598 00:15:02,335 --> 00:15:06,339 You're just a little 599 00:15:02,335 --> 00:15:06,339 Too hairy for me. 600 00:15:06,373 --> 00:15:07,340 You know, 601 00:15:06,373 --> 00:15:07,340 If you still want 602 00:15:07,374 --> 00:15:09,420 to go to book of mormon 603 00:15:07,374 --> 00:15:09,420 As friends... 604 00:15:09,420 --> 00:15:10,577 - I do not. 605 00:15:10,610 --> 00:15:12,479 - he could shave, 606 00:15:10,610 --> 00:15:12,479 You know? 607 00:15:12,512 --> 00:15:14,347 Let me take him home, 608 00:15:12,512 --> 00:15:14,347 Shave him tonight, 609 00:15:14,381 --> 00:15:18,151 We'll do this whole thing 610 00:15:14,381 --> 00:15:18,151 Again tomorrow. 611 00:15:18,184 --> 00:15:21,454 - game over. 612 00:15:18,184 --> 00:15:21,454 Too hairy. 613 00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:27,227 - how did it go? 614 00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:27,227 [chuckles] 615 00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:28,561 Were the kids merciless? 616 00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:30,930 - no, we raised them 617 00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:30,930 Too well. 618 00:15:30,964 --> 00:15:34,670 They're only merciless 619 00:15:30,964 --> 00:15:34,670 With us. 620 00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:36,336 But I did 621 00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:36,336 Get to the bottom of it. 622 00:15:36,369 --> 00:15:38,710 Your dad doesn't like me 623 00:15:38,104 --> 00:15:40,507 Because I never asked him 624 00:15:38,104 --> 00:15:40,507 For permission to marry you. 625 00:15:40,540 --> 00:15:42,542 - what? 626 00:15:40,540 --> 00:15:42,542 - mm-hmm. 627 00:15:42,575 --> 00:15:44,310 - that's crazy! 628 00:15:44,344 --> 00:15:47,647 You didn't ask him 629 00:15:44,344 --> 00:15:47,647 Because I told you not to. 630 00:15:47,681 --> 00:15:50,583 I hate the idea of fathers 631 00:15:47,681 --> 00:15:50,583 Marrying off their daughters. 632 00:15:50,617 --> 00:15:52,686 He can't give me away. 633 00:15:52,719 --> 00:15:55,722 I'm not a goat. 634 00:15:55,755 --> 00:15:58,910 - no, you're not. 635 00:15:58,124 --> 00:16:01,928 You're a tigress. 636 00:16:02,280 --> 00:16:05,465 - gary, we are not 637 00:16:02,280 --> 00:16:05,465 Having sex right now. 638 00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:07,467 - eh, thought 639 00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:07,467 I'd give it a shot. 640 00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:10,136 You know, I'm feeling 641 00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:10,136 A little frustrated. 642 00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:12,572 - chris, come on. 643 00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:12,572 We cannot figure out the points. 644 00:16:12,605 --> 00:16:14,740 Help us settle this thing. 645 00:16:14,107 --> 00:16:16,576 Who won? 646 00:16:14,107 --> 00:16:16,576 My girl, who you liked-- 647 00:16:16,609 --> 00:16:20,280 - who thinks 648 00:16:16,609 --> 00:16:20,280 You're a sasquatch. 649 00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:21,548 Or my girl-- 650 00:16:21,581 --> 00:16:23,249 - who texted you a photo 651 00:16:23,283 --> 00:16:27,530 Of her pretending 652 00:16:23,283 --> 00:16:27,530 To breast-feed her cat. 653 00:16:31,358 --> 00:16:33,660 - guys, stop, okay? 654 00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:36,629 Nobody won tonight, 655 00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:36,629 And the only loser here is me. 656 00:16:36,663 --> 00:16:38,331 So I'm glad 657 00:16:36,663 --> 00:16:38,331 That you have each other 658 00:16:38,365 --> 00:16:39,733 And that you're having fun 659 00:16:38,365 --> 00:16:39,733 With my life, 660 00:16:39,766 --> 00:16:43,303 But I'm not. 661 00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:46,506 - wow. 662 00:16:46,539 --> 00:16:52,780 You're really 663 00:16:46,539 --> 00:16:52,780 Bumming me out right now. 664 00:16:52,780 --> 00:16:54,280 - chris, we are so sorry. 665 00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:55,749 You are absolutely right. 666 00:16:55,782 --> 00:16:58,685 We do want you to find someone 667 00:16:55,782 --> 00:16:58,685 That makes you happy. 668 00:16:58,718 --> 00:17:01,154 - thank you. 669 00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,623 - we do. We do. 670 00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:05,392 But I also want you 671 00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:05,392 To find someone 672 00:17:05,425 --> 00:17:07,460 That will benefit me 673 00:17:05,425 --> 00:17:07,460 In some way, 674 00:17:07,493 --> 00:17:10,195 Like a doctor 675 00:17:07,493 --> 00:17:10,195 Or a local bartender. 676 00:17:10,230 --> 00:17:12,265 You know, I cannot pay $20 677 00:17:10,230 --> 00:17:12,265 For a drink anymore. 678 00:17:12,298 --> 00:17:14,733 I won't pay $20. 679 00:17:20,940 --> 00:17:23,309 [knock at door] 680 00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:28,648 - all right, I'm here. 681 00:17:28,682 --> 00:17:31,317 What couldn't you 682 00:17:28,682 --> 00:17:31,317 Have told me on the phone? 683 00:17:31,351 --> 00:17:34,220 - I'm taking you on a journey 684 00:17:31,351 --> 00:17:34,220 Back to 2002. 685 00:17:34,254 --> 00:17:35,655 [outkast's hey yaplaying] 686 00:17:35,689 --> 00:17:36,756 - * my baby 687 00:17:35,689 --> 00:17:36,756 Don't mess around * 688 00:17:36,790 --> 00:17:37,891 * because she loves me so * 689 00:17:37,924 --> 00:17:41,610 * and this I know for sure * 690 00:17:41,610 --> 00:17:42,729 - gary, what's going on? 691 00:17:42,762 --> 00:17:44,230 Where's marny? 692 00:17:42,762 --> 00:17:44,230 Where are the kids? 693 00:17:44,264 --> 00:17:45,732 - well, I don't have 694 00:17:44,264 --> 00:17:45,732 Any kids. 695 00:17:45,765 --> 00:17:47,734 Marny and I 696 00:17:45,765 --> 00:17:47,734 Aren't even married yet. 697 00:17:47,767 --> 00:17:49,269 It's 2002, remember? 698 00:17:49,302 --> 00:17:52,720 Jimmy carter just won 699 00:17:49,302 --> 00:17:52,720 The nobel peace prize, 700 00:17:52,105 --> 00:17:53,807 We lost 701 00:17:52,105 --> 00:17:53,807 Musician joe strummer, 702 00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:56,343 And I'm ten years away 703 00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:56,343 From looking up those facts 704 00:17:56,376 --> 00:17:58,745 On wikipedia. 705 00:17:58,778 --> 00:18:00,814 - is there a point 706 00:17:58,778 --> 00:18:00,814 You're trying to make? 707 00:18:00,847 --> 00:18:02,480 - yes. 708 00:18:02,820 --> 00:18:03,717 I'm going back to the year 709 00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:05,585 That I fell madly in love 710 00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:05,585 With your daughter, 711 00:18:05,618 --> 00:18:09,255 A remarkable woman whose 712 00:18:05,618 --> 00:18:09,255 Mix of brains and attitude 713 00:18:09,289 --> 00:18:11,691 Scared the crap outta me. 714 00:18:11,725 --> 00:18:15,595 But I knew I had 715 00:18:11,725 --> 00:18:15,595 To make her my wife. 716 00:18:15,628 --> 00:18:16,730 - uh-huh. 717 00:18:16,763 --> 00:18:18,980 Go on. 718 00:18:18,131 --> 00:18:21,101 - well, mr. Baines, 719 00:18:18,131 --> 00:18:21,101 As you know, 720 00:18:21,134 --> 00:18:23,103 Marny and I 721 00:18:21,134 --> 00:18:23,103 Are getting pretty serious, 722 00:18:23,136 --> 00:18:24,938 So I reckon that one day-- 723 00:18:25,380 --> 00:18:28,108 - you reckon? 724 00:18:28,141 --> 00:18:30,777 - come on, man, 725 00:18:28,141 --> 00:18:30,777 I've never done this before. 726 00:18:30,810 --> 00:18:33,613 - I know. 727 00:18:36,282 --> 00:18:39,619 - sir, I love your daughter. 728 00:18:39,652 --> 00:18:41,388 She's my best friend, 729 00:18:41,421 --> 00:18:43,289 And I'm a better person 730 00:18:41,421 --> 00:18:43,289 With her in my life, 731 00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:45,658 And I will do 732 00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:45,658 Everything within my power 733 00:18:45,692 --> 00:18:47,961 To keep her safe and happy. 734 00:18:48,610 --> 00:18:53,266 So I'm here to ask 735 00:18:48,610 --> 00:18:53,266 For her hand in marriage. 736 00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:56,336 Mr. Baines, 737 00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:56,336 Will you grant me permission 738 00:18:56,369 --> 00:18:59,139 To marry your daughter? 739 00:18:59,172 --> 00:19:02,308 - [sighs] 740 00:19:02,342 --> 00:19:03,143 No. 741 00:19:03,176 --> 00:19:05,812 - come on, man, 742 00:19:03,176 --> 00:19:05,812 What do you mean no? 743 00:19:05,845 --> 00:19:07,280 - no. 744 00:19:05,845 --> 00:19:07,280 - no? 745 00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:10,160 - hey, hey. 746 00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:10,160 What's going on here? 747 00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:12,520 - I just asked your father 748 00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:12,520 Permission to marry you 749 00:19:12,850 --> 00:19:13,753 And he told me no. 750 00:19:13,787 --> 00:19:16,423 - gary, I told you 751 00:19:13,787 --> 00:19:16,423 I didn't want you 752 00:19:16,456 --> 00:19:18,158 To ask for his permission. 753 00:19:18,191 --> 00:19:21,428 Not then, not now, 754 00:19:18,191 --> 00:19:21,428 Not ever. 755 00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:23,830 - wait, you told him 756 00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:23,830 Not to ask me? 757 00:19:23,863 --> 00:19:27,670 - yeah. 758 00:19:23,863 --> 00:19:27,670 I'm not yours to give away. 759 00:19:27,100 --> 00:19:30,170 I'm not a goat. 760 00:19:30,203 --> 00:19:32,739 - no, she's a tigress. 761 00:19:35,942 --> 00:19:37,911 - it's just 762 00:19:35,942 --> 00:19:37,911 A sign of respect. 763 00:19:37,944 --> 00:19:41,448 - dad, I'm sorry 764 00:19:37,944 --> 00:19:41,448 That it hurt your feelings, 765 00:19:41,481 --> 00:19:45,185 But it's not 766 00:19:41,481 --> 00:19:45,185 What I wanted. 767 00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:47,454 What I admire 768 00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:47,454 About you the most 769 00:19:47,487 --> 00:19:49,356 Is that while you're 770 00:19:47,487 --> 00:19:49,356 The very definition 771 00:19:49,389 --> 00:19:51,324 Of old-fashioned, 772 00:19:51,358 --> 00:19:53,193 You raised your daughters 773 00:19:53,226 --> 00:19:56,329 To be as strong 774 00:19:53,226 --> 00:19:56,329 And independent as any man. 775 00:19:56,363 --> 00:19:57,864 - hmm. 776 00:19:57,897 --> 00:19:59,366 - and I love you for that. 777 00:19:59,399 --> 00:20:02,202 - well, I am a good father. 778 00:20:02,235 --> 00:20:05,372 - the best. 779 00:20:05,405 --> 00:20:07,407 - top two. 780 00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:10,430 - gary... 781 00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:12,379 You could have told me 782 00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:12,379 She told you not to, 783 00:20:12,412 --> 00:20:13,847 But you didn't, 784 00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:16,383 Because you put 785 00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:16,383 Marny's feelings over mine, 786 00:20:16,416 --> 00:20:19,519 And I have to respect that. 787 00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:21,821 - thank you. 788 00:20:21,855 --> 00:20:25,358 So you like me now? 789 00:20:25,392 --> 00:20:28,762 - I said I respect you now. 790 00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:32,799 - that's good enough, dad. 791 00:20:32,832 --> 00:20:34,801 - judge. 792 00:20:34,834 --> 00:20:37,904 - judge dad? 793 00:20:37,937 --> 00:20:39,406 - judge judge. 794 00:20:39,439 --> 00:20:41,441 - I miss vivian. 795 00:20:41,474 --> 00:20:45,445 You know, let's not 796 00:20:41,474 --> 00:20:45,445 Leave her at home next time. 797 00:20:45,478 --> 00:20:47,130 [knock at door] 798 00:20:45,478 --> 00:20:47,130 - hey! 799 00:20:47,470 --> 00:20:48,181 - hey! 800 00:20:48,214 --> 00:20:50,830 Hey, come here. 801 00:20:48,214 --> 00:20:50,830 Come here! 802 00:20:50,116 --> 00:20:51,418 Yeah! 803 00:20:51,451 --> 00:20:52,819 Ah. 804 00:20:51,451 --> 00:20:52,819 [raspberries] 805 00:20:52,852 --> 00:20:54,487 - now he has 806 00:20:52,852 --> 00:20:54,487 A little cold tonight, 807 00:20:54,521 --> 00:20:57,424 So have fun 808 00:20:54,521 --> 00:20:57,424 Trying to get to sleep. 809 00:20:57,457 --> 00:20:59,959 - still be more fun 810 00:20:57,457 --> 00:20:59,959 Than my dates. 811 00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:01,528 - oh, well, don't give up. 812 00:21:01,561 --> 00:21:03,263 Remember our first date 813 00:21:01,561 --> 00:21:03,263 Wasn't so great. 814 00:21:03,296 --> 00:21:05,965 The picnic? Ew. 815 00:21:06,660 --> 00:21:07,801 - that's right. 816 00:21:07,834 --> 00:21:10,904 Oh, and then 817 00:21:07,834 --> 00:21:10,904 We got divorced. 818 00:21:10,937 --> 00:21:12,505 - listen, chris, 819 00:21:10,937 --> 00:21:12,505 As hard as dating is, 820 00:21:12,539 --> 00:21:14,207 We can't give up. 821 00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:16,109 There is someone out there 822 00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:16,109 Who will love you 823 00:21:16,142 --> 00:21:17,844 The way you deserve. 824 00:21:17,877 --> 00:21:19,379 - thanks. 825 00:21:19,412 --> 00:21:22,248 - "And there's someone 826 00:21:19,412 --> 00:21:22,248 Out there for you too," 827 00:21:22,282 --> 00:21:25,518 Is what you were 828 00:21:22,282 --> 00:21:25,518 Supposed to say. 829 00:21:25,552 --> 00:21:27,420 - um, there's somebody 830 00:21:25,552 --> 00:21:27,420 Out there-- 831 00:21:27,454 --> 00:21:29,456 - okay, no, no, it's too late. 832 00:21:27,454 --> 00:21:29,456 Have a good night. 833 00:21:29,489 --> 00:21:31,491 Although you won't, 834 00:21:31,524 --> 00:21:32,926 Because he also 835 00:21:31,524 --> 00:21:32,926 Has a tooth coming in. 836 00:21:32,959 --> 00:21:35,929 So bye-bye. 837 00:21:32,959 --> 00:21:35,929 Ha ha. 838 00:21:38,465 --> 00:21:40,834 [birds chirping] 48830

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.