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Long ago in a distant land...
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...I, Aku, the shape-shiftingmaster of darkness...
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...unleashed an unspeakable evil.
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But a foolish samurai warriorwielding a magic sword...
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...stepped forth to oppose me.
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Before the final blow was struck...
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...I tore open a portal in time,and flung him into the future...
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...where my evil is law.
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Now the fool seeksto return to the past...
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...and undo the future that is Aku.
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Move it, slave. Pick it up.
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Don't worry,
you'll get used to it soon enough.
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-What do you mean?
-Silence! No talking, slave.
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Halt.
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-What is--?
-No talking.
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lt is no use.
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There is no escape.
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What is this place?
Why have we been brought here?
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These things are of no importance now.
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When daybreak comes, you will fight.
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-And then you will be no more.
-What?
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He's right.
None can survive in the Dome of Doom.
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Come on, wake up. lt's showtime.
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Come on, move it.
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And now, without any delay,
the first challenger of the day.
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Weighing in at 280 septiles...
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...Poogle the Pitiful.
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Facing the 1 2-time champion
of the ring...
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...the minister of agony,
the baron of brutality...
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...the coroner of carnage,
the dealer of destruction...
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...Gordo the Gruesome.
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Well, how about that, folks?
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That was a pretty long round
for Gordo the Gruesome.
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Bring out the next challenger.
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lntroducing our next opponent,
weighing in at a mere--
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Well, there you have it, folks.
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Welcome...
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...to the Dome of Doom.
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Our talent search has spread
throughout the universe...
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...to bring you only the finest quality
of challenger...
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...to battle the greatest of champions.
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No victory is too small.
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No wound is too great.
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No weapon is illegal.
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And now the Dome of Doom
presents for your pleasure...
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...Two Sandals the Treacherous.
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Gordo, we call upon you
to destroy this vile villain.
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Prepare to suffer,
Two Sandals the Treacherous.
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l will beat you like a drum.
l will hang you out like laundry.
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And now, without any further--
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l am the master mechanic,
the alpha and omega.
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l will put a hurting on you, slave.
l'm gonna tear you up into little shreds.
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Then l'll take those shreds
and tear them into shreds.
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l will make your mother cry.
l will make your Aunt Edna...
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...from Withershoot proper,
south of Barnaby, cry.
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Are you ready for pain, Two Sandals?!
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l am not intimidated by your shouting.
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A true warrior fights not with words,
but with--
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What?
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This-- This is unprecedented.
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But wait.
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Oh, yes.
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lt looks like he's gone primal
on us, folks. This is it.
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Oh, this is unwitnessable.
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Nobody has ever knocked down Gordo.
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He's out.
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l-- l have nothing to say.
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Except...
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...bring out the next champion!
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Deep from within the deepest abyss
of the seventh ocean of Amalgamous...
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...arose a champion
of unimaginable proportions.
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Half machine, half flesh, all terror.
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The Aqualizer.
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Dome of Doom,
once more have you summoned.
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To answer your call, l have risen
from the depths of the abyss...
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...to conquer the ring
and to put an end to this lowly amateur.
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Do not fear.
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l have traveled the seven seas
and conquered far greater foes...
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...than this mere contender.
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Help me!
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Help!
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Doom, doom, doom!
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The crowd calls upon you, Two Sandals...
84
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...to put the doom on the Aqualizer.
85
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No, l will not participate
in this senseless violence any longer.
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You will have to get
your entertainment elsewhere.
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This is a dark moment indeed.
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Not only has he insulted the ring...
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...he has insulted us.
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We will show no more mercy
to this two-sandaled heathen.
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lntroducing the champion
to end all champions.
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Weighing in at a mere 700 tons...
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...l give you...
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...Sumoto.
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l will not fight.
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Then you will be destroyed.
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00:16:09,981 --> 00:16:12,415
l will not fight you, Sumoto.
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lt's the Sumoto swan dive.
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No challenger has ever survived it.
100
00:16:34,872 --> 00:16:36,703
Thank you, Sumoto...
101
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...for putting the doom back
in the Dome of Doom.
102
00:16:44,849 --> 00:16:48,444
This-- This can't be.
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lt looks like Sumoto is ticklish.
104
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This is incongruous...
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...inconceivable, inexcusable.
106
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Very well then.
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00:17:46,377 --> 00:17:50,143
lf no one champion can bring him down...
108
00:17:50,314 --> 00:17:53,977
...then bring out all the champions.
109
00:17:54,418 --> 00:17:58,252
May l present Torto.
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Maotis.
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The Claw.
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00:18:04,428 --> 00:18:07,124
Raptor.
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Mr. Roboto.
114
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And finally, Ganeesh.
115
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This must end once and for all.
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Let the carnage begin.
117
00:19:24,108 --> 00:19:29,045
Wise man knows everything,
a shrewd one, everybody.
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00:19:29,213 --> 00:19:31,272
You can hide, but you cannot run.
119
00:20:07,852 --> 00:20:12,687
A true coward runs not from his opponent
but from himself.
120
00:20:14,592 --> 00:20:18,653
Many receive advice.
Only the wise profit by it.
121
00:20:41,819 --> 00:20:45,118
Two Sandals, Two Sandals, Two Sandals!
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Enough!
123
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ls this what you call entertainment?
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The senseless slaughter of innocents?
No more.
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Set the slaves free.
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Set them free.
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00:21:07,645 --> 00:21:10,978
Yes, yes, of course.
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00:21:18,722 --> 00:21:23,659
From now on, there will be
no more fighting for your entertainment.
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00:21:26,664 --> 00:21:29,497
You heard him, you're free.
Now get out of here. Go on, get.
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You.
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[ENGLlSH]
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