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1
00:00:33,701 --> 00:00:36,604
[CHATTER]
2
00:00:41,842 --> 00:00:45,213
[LAUGHTER]
3
00:00:45,246 --> 00:00:47,148
*
4
00:01:19,647 --> 00:01:21,749
DON'T FORGET THIS.
5
00:01:21,782 --> 00:01:24,485
THAT WAS A PRESENT FOR YOU.
6
00:01:24,518 --> 00:01:26,420
I DON'T FEEL COMFORTABLE
HOLDING ON TO IT.
7
00:01:26,454 --> 00:01:28,822
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED
TO DO WITH IT?
8
00:01:28,856 --> 00:01:30,558
THROW IT AWAY.
9
00:01:31,859 --> 00:01:33,294
FINE.
10
00:01:56,884 --> 00:01:58,786
*
11
00:02:15,569 --> 00:02:17,538
WE WERE AN "IT" COUPLE.
12
00:02:17,571 --> 00:02:19,540
NOT REALLY.
13
00:02:19,573 --> 00:02:21,575
LIKE WHEN WE'D GO TO PARTIES
AND THERE WAS DANCING,
14
00:02:21,609 --> 00:02:23,211
WE'D START DANCING
AND EVERYONE WOULD
15
00:02:23,244 --> 00:02:25,746
MAKE A CIRCLE AROUND US
AND WATCH US DANCE.
16
00:02:25,779 --> 00:02:28,148
OKAY.
17
00:02:29,550 --> 00:02:31,519
OKAY, WHY DON'T YOU
TELL ME
18
00:02:31,552 --> 00:02:33,687
WHAT YOU NEED, SHIRIN?
19
00:02:33,721 --> 00:02:36,190
I NEED MY GIRLFRIEND BACK.
20
00:02:36,224 --> 00:02:37,691
DUDE, I REALLY THINK
21
00:02:37,725 --> 00:02:41,362
YOU JUST NEED TO MOURN THIS
AND MOVE ON.
22
00:02:41,395 --> 00:02:43,364
I REALLY WANT TO EAT
MY FEELINGS RIGHT NOW.
23
00:02:43,397 --> 00:02:45,633
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I THINK THAT'S AN AMAZING IDEA.
24
00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:48,536
WHY DON'T WE ORDER
ALL THE FATTY, DISGUSTING FOODS
25
00:02:48,569 --> 00:02:49,837
WE NEVER LET OURSELVES EAT?
26
00:02:49,870 --> 00:02:51,339
OKAY.
27
00:02:51,372 --> 00:02:52,940
HEY, GIRLS.
HOW YOU DOIN' TODAY?
28
00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:55,209
HEY.
FANTASTIC.
29
00:02:55,243 --> 00:02:56,944
AND YOU?
UH, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
30
00:02:56,977 --> 00:02:58,512
BRENDAN.
BRENDAN.
31
00:02:58,546 --> 00:02:59,847
HEY, I'M CRYSTAL.
32
00:02:59,880 --> 00:03:01,682
HEY, CRYSTAL.
WHAT CAN I GET YOU TODAY?
33
00:03:01,715 --> 00:03:02,850
UM, LET ME SEE.
34
00:03:02,883 --> 00:03:05,519
I WOULD LOVE AN...
35
00:03:05,553 --> 00:03:07,588
UNSWEETENED GLASS
OF ICED TEA.
36
00:03:07,621 --> 00:03:08,989
NO PROBLEM.
THANK YOU.
37
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:10,558
AND CAN I JUST HAVE ONE
OF THOSE COMPLIMENTARY MINTS
38
00:03:10,591 --> 00:03:12,693
I SAW BY THE ENTRANCE
AND A GLASS OF ICE WATER
39
00:03:12,726 --> 00:03:15,263
AND A LITTLE BIT OF LEMON
IN THERE.
40
00:03:15,296 --> 00:03:16,430
OKAY.
41
00:03:16,464 --> 00:03:19,633
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
THANKS, BRENDAN.
42
00:03:19,667 --> 00:03:21,302
MMM, DELISH.
43
00:03:21,335 --> 00:03:23,804
MMM, CAN'T WAIT.
44
00:03:25,439 --> 00:03:27,541
I'M DEAD INSIDE.
45
00:03:27,575 --> 00:03:29,377
CAN YOU TELL
JUST BY LOOKING AT ME
46
00:03:29,410 --> 00:03:30,444
THAT I'M DEAD INSIDE?
47
00:03:30,478 --> 00:03:32,813
I REALLY THINK
YOU HAD TO END IT.
48
00:03:32,846 --> 00:03:35,816
I MEAN, SHE WASN'T EVEN
FUCKING YOU TOWARDS THE END.
49
00:03:35,849 --> 00:03:37,485
MAYBE IT WAS A PHASE.
50
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:40,821
THANKS, BRENDAN.
51
00:03:40,854 --> 00:03:43,557
[WOMAN HUMMING]
52
00:03:43,591 --> 00:03:45,493
* GOT TO HOLD ON...
53
00:03:45,526 --> 00:03:47,595
HOW ABOUT "GIRAFFE"?
54
00:03:47,628 --> 00:03:49,297
WHAT ABOUT "SAFE WORD"?
55
00:03:49,330 --> 00:03:51,565
LIKE THE WORD "SAFE WORD"
AS OUR SAFE WORD?
56
00:03:51,599 --> 00:03:53,334
LET'S CUT OUT THE MIDDLEMAN,
57
00:03:53,367 --> 00:03:55,035
'CAUSE WHAT HAPPENS
IF YOU FORGET YOUR SAFE WORD?
58
00:03:55,068 --> 00:03:57,037
OKAY, THEN,
THE SAFE WORD IS "SAFE WORD."
59
00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,872
GREAT.
LET'S DO THIS.
60
00:03:58,906 --> 00:04:00,341
WHAT'S THE SCENARIO?
61
00:04:00,374 --> 00:04:02,443
I'M YOUR TAX AUDITOR.
62
00:04:04,645 --> 00:04:05,913
OKAY.
63
00:04:05,946 --> 00:04:08,716
MISS?
YES?
64
00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:12,753
CAN YOU PLEASE
FILL OUT THIS FORM?
65
00:04:12,786 --> 00:04:14,588
ALL RIGHT.
66
00:04:23,431 --> 00:04:25,666
MISS?
YES?
67
00:04:25,699 --> 00:04:28,302
I'VE BEEN A BAD
SMALL-BUSINESS OWNER.
68
00:04:28,336 --> 00:04:29,770
WHAT SEEMS TO BE
THE PROBLEM?
69
00:04:29,803 --> 00:04:31,572
I DON'T HAVE
ANY OF MY RECEIPTS
70
00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:33,807
FROM JUNE UNTIL AUGUST,
71
00:04:33,841 --> 00:04:36,310
AND I'M GONNA
HAVE TO BE PUNISHED.
72
00:04:36,344 --> 00:04:38,612
THAT'S ACTUALLY
EASILY REMEDIED.
73
00:04:38,646 --> 00:04:41,048
IF YOU'LL JUST FILL IN
THE LARGER EXPENSES IN SECTION C
74
00:04:41,081 --> 00:04:42,082
AND CROSS-CHECK THEM
WITH SECTION B.
75
00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:43,351
MAXINE.
WHAT?
76
00:04:43,384 --> 00:04:45,419
YOU ARE KILLING THE SEXY.
77
00:04:45,453 --> 00:04:46,554
I'M JUST--
78
00:04:46,587 --> 00:04:48,956
[SIGHS]
I'M NOT INTO ROLE PLAY.
79
00:04:48,989 --> 00:04:50,758
THAT'S-- THAT'S OKAY.
80
00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:52,092
I'M VANILLA.
81
00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:53,461
DON'T SAY THAT.
82
00:04:53,494 --> 00:04:55,829
IT TRUE.
I'M NOT KINKY.
83
00:04:55,863 --> 00:04:57,465
HEY.
84
00:04:59,066 --> 00:05:00,834
LOOK AT ME.
85
00:05:00,868 --> 00:05:04,037
I LIKE VANILLA.
86
00:05:04,071 --> 00:05:05,973
I'M NOT REALLY IN THE MOOD.
87
00:05:06,006 --> 00:05:07,475
I'M SORRY.
88
00:05:08,876 --> 00:05:10,444
IT'S OKAY.
89
00:05:26,494 --> 00:05:28,396
BANAL SEX
SHOULDN'T START
90
00:05:28,429 --> 00:05:30,931
UNTIL AT LEAST A YEAR
INTO A RELATIONSHIP.
91
00:05:30,964 --> 00:05:33,000
I MOVED IN TOO SOON.
92
00:05:33,033 --> 00:05:35,068
WHEN ARE YOU GOING
BACK TO WORK?
93
00:05:35,102 --> 00:05:36,537
I'M NOT.
94
00:05:36,570 --> 00:05:38,105
NO!
95
00:05:38,138 --> 00:05:40,073
THE ONLY REASON THEY HIRED ME
IN THE FIRST PLACE
96
00:05:40,107 --> 00:05:41,509
IS 'CAUSE THEY WANTED
97
00:05:41,542 --> 00:05:42,876
A MIDDLE EASTERN PERSON
ON STAFF.
98
00:05:42,910 --> 00:05:44,545
NOW THAT YAVAH'S
IN EDITORIAL,
99
00:05:44,578 --> 00:05:46,414
EVERYONE'S GUSHING
OVER HOW SYRIAN SHE IS.
100
00:05:46,447 --> 00:05:48,982
I'M NOT LETTING YOU FALL
INTO A BOTTOMLESS PIT
101
00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:52,553
OF DESPAIR AND UNEMPLOYMENT
ON MY COUCH.
102
00:05:52,586 --> 00:05:54,054
NOTHING BRINGS ME JOY.
103
00:05:54,087 --> 00:05:57,157
WELL... I THINK THIS GUY
I KNOW IS HIRING.
104
00:05:57,190 --> 00:05:58,792
LET ME TALK TO HIM.
105
00:05:58,826 --> 00:05:59,927
AND ARE YOU GONNA GO LOOK
106
00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:01,495
AT THAT APARTMENT
IN BUSHWICK LATER?
107
00:06:01,529 --> 00:06:03,096
I CAN'T. I HAVE TO
GO SEE MY PARENTS.
108
00:06:03,130 --> 00:06:05,065
OH, MY GOD!
CAN I COME?
109
00:06:05,098 --> 00:06:06,700
YOUR DAD IS SO HOT.
110
00:06:06,734 --> 00:06:08,702
I JUST WANT TO,
LIKE, PAINT HIM.
111
00:06:08,736 --> 00:06:10,471
UGH, NO.
112
00:06:10,504 --> 00:06:12,806
THAT IS EXACTLY
WHY YOU CANNOT COME.
113
00:06:12,840 --> 00:06:15,476
SO, UH...
114
00:06:15,509 --> 00:06:17,878
[MAN]
SO, IN THE AFTERNOON,
I TOOK AN APPENDIX,
115
00:06:17,911 --> 00:06:20,448
AND I REWIRED IT
ON THIS KID
116
00:06:20,481 --> 00:06:23,116
WHO HAD NO CONTROL
OF HIS OWN URINE.
117
00:06:23,150 --> 00:06:24,485
STOP.
WOW.
118
00:06:24,518 --> 00:06:25,853
NO, NO, NO,
WE MADE HIM DRY.
119
00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:27,187
BUT NOW HE HAS TO PEE
OUT OF HIS BELLY BUTTON.
120
00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:28,789
[SHIRIN]
PLEASE STOP.
121
00:06:28,822 --> 00:06:30,924
THIS IS FASCINATING.
NOT WHILE WE'RE EATING.
122
00:06:30,958 --> 00:06:32,760
YEAH, IT CAN WAIT
UNTIL AFTER, RIGHT?
OKAY.
123
00:06:32,793 --> 00:06:33,827
DID YOU SEE
ALI'S PICTURE
124
00:06:33,861 --> 00:06:35,596
OF THE SEX-REASSIGNMENT
SURGERY?
125
00:06:35,629 --> 00:06:37,030
NO, I DIDN'T, 'CAUSE
I DELETED IT THE MINUTE
126
00:06:37,064 --> 00:06:39,967
I READ "INTESTINE VAGINA"
IN THE SUBJECT.
127
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:41,502
THEY'RE INTERESTING
PICTURES.
YEAH, THEY ARE.
128
00:06:41,535 --> 00:06:42,870
SHOW THEM.
PLEASE DON'T DO THIS.
129
00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:44,171
I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY
130
00:06:44,204 --> 00:06:45,806
HE HAD TO GO
INTO UROLOGY.
131
00:06:45,839 --> 00:06:47,074
IT'S BECAUSE HE LOVES
THE PENISES SO MUCH.
132
00:06:47,107 --> 00:06:48,542
[LAUGHTER]
FUNNY, DAD.
133
00:06:48,576 --> 00:06:49,643
HERE YOU GO.
CHECK IT OUT.
UGH!
134
00:06:49,677 --> 00:06:51,178
OH, MY GOD.
WHAT?
135
00:06:51,211 --> 00:06:52,513
TAKE A LOOK AT IT.
YOU'RE NOT EVEN LOOKING AT IT.
136
00:06:52,546 --> 00:06:53,647
PLEASE PUT THAT AWAY.
137
00:06:53,681 --> 00:06:54,748
I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT.
138
00:06:54,782 --> 00:06:55,883
SHE DOESN'T WANT
TO SEE IT.
139
00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:57,951
PUT IT AWAY.
OKAY, SUIT YOURSELF.
140
00:06:57,985 --> 00:07:00,521
LAYLI.
YES?
141
00:07:00,554 --> 00:07:03,223
ALI SAYS THAT YOU JUST STARTED
YOUR FELLOWSHIP.
142
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:04,958
THAT'S RIGHT.
143
00:07:04,992 --> 00:07:06,126
PLASTIC SURGERY.
144
00:07:06,159 --> 00:07:07,461
MM-HMM.
145
00:07:07,495 --> 00:07:09,863
ISN'T IT WEIRD, THOUGH?
146
00:07:09,897 --> 00:07:11,532
LIKE, HE'S DEALING
147
00:07:11,565 --> 00:07:13,100
WITH LIFE-AND-DEATH SITUATIONS
EVERY DAY,
148
00:07:13,133 --> 00:07:15,969
AND THEN YOU'RE WITH
THESE MIDDLE-AGED HOUSEWIVES
149
00:07:16,003 --> 00:07:19,039
WITH LOW SELF-ESTEEM.
150
00:07:19,072 --> 00:07:20,874
LAYLI IS A PEDIATRIC
151
00:07:20,908 --> 00:07:22,743
RECONSTRUCTIVE
PLASTIC SURGEON.
152
00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:24,712
I ACTUALLY--
UH, I SPECIALIZE
153
00:07:24,745 --> 00:07:26,914
IN BURN TREATMENT
AND SKIN GRAFTING.
154
00:07:28,682 --> 00:07:30,183
COOL.
155
00:07:30,217 --> 00:07:33,120
I HEARD YOU ARE WORKING
AT "THE BROOKLYN PAPER."
156
00:07:33,153 --> 00:07:34,588
YEAH.
157
00:07:34,622 --> 00:07:36,156
UM, I'M ACTUALLY
THINKING
158
00:07:36,189 --> 00:07:38,626
ABOUT TRANSITIONING
INTO ANOTHER FIELD.
159
00:07:38,659 --> 00:07:39,827
SO, LET ME GET THIS
STRAIGHT.
160
00:07:39,860 --> 00:07:41,929
YOU GOT A MASTERS
IN JOURNALISM,
161
00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:43,864
AND NOW YOU'RE GONNA DO
JACK SHIT WITH IT?
162
00:07:43,897 --> 00:07:45,666
SHE CAN STILL USE
HER DEGREE.
163
00:07:45,699 --> 00:07:46,734
SHE'S SO TALENTED.
164
00:07:46,767 --> 00:07:47,935
THANK YOU.
165
00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:49,837
SHE WAS THE ONLY FRESHMAN
IN HIGH SCHOOL
166
00:07:49,870 --> 00:07:51,872
WHO COULD SWIM
ON THE VARSITY TEAM.
167
00:07:51,905 --> 00:07:53,574
AND SHE DIDN'T EVEN
TAKE LESSONS.
168
00:07:53,607 --> 00:07:55,776
WOW, THAT'S A REAL
RESUME BUILDER RIGHT THERE.
169
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:57,177
YEAH, THIS BODY'S MADE
FOR SWIMMING.
170
00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:59,179
LOOK AT THESE SHOULDERS.
THAT'S ENOUGH.
171
00:07:59,212 --> 00:08:01,281
THANK YOU.
AND LOOK AT THOSE HANDS.
172
00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:02,616
PLEASE STOP.
AREN'T THEY STUNNING?
173
00:08:02,650 --> 00:08:04,084
THEY'RE BEAUTIFUL HANDS.
174
00:08:04,117 --> 00:08:06,654
YOU KNOW, YOU SHOULD GET
INTO HAND MODELING.
AH.
175
00:08:06,687 --> 00:08:08,789
BUT I JUST DON'T KNOW
HOW PEOPLE GET STARTED.
IT'S WHO YOU KNOW.
176
00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:11,024
A MASTERS IN JOURNALISM,
THAT'S HOW YOU GET STARTED.
177
00:08:11,058 --> 00:08:13,561
I WOULD LITERALLY LIKE TO
TALK ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE.
178
00:08:13,594 --> 00:08:15,829
OKAY, HOW'S YOUR LOVE LIFE?
[ALI LAUGHS]
179
00:08:15,863 --> 00:08:16,930
ANY BOYS WE SHOULD
KNOW ABOUT?
180
00:08:16,964 --> 00:08:18,899
NO.
NO BOYS AT ALL.
181
00:08:18,932 --> 00:08:21,535
OH, THANK GOD I DON'T HAVE TO
GET MY SHOTGUN READY THEN.
182
00:08:21,569 --> 00:08:24,037
[LAUGHTER]
GOOD ONE, DAD.
183
00:08:24,071 --> 00:08:25,172
[ALI]
OH, GOD.
184
00:08:25,205 --> 00:08:27,107
*
185
00:08:33,146 --> 00:08:34,848
KEN?
186
00:08:34,882 --> 00:08:36,216
HEY.
GINNY.
187
00:08:36,249 --> 00:08:38,986
SHIRIN.
SHIRIN.
188
00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:41,188
WHAT IS THAT? LIBYAN?
ARMENIAN? ARGENTINEAN?
189
00:08:41,221 --> 00:08:42,189
IRANIAN.
190
00:08:42,222 --> 00:08:43,991
OH, IRANIAN.
191
00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:46,660
WOW. IRAN.
192
00:08:46,694 --> 00:08:47,995
WHAT DO YOU THINK
OF THAT WHOLE SITUATION?
193
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:51,331
IT'S A MIXED BAG.
194
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:53,667
A LOT OF VERY
GOOD-INTENTIONED PEOPLE
195
00:08:53,701 --> 00:08:55,769
DEALING WITH SOME
DIFFICULT CIRCUMSTANCES.
196
00:08:55,803 --> 00:08:57,838
YOU GET OVER THERE
VERY OFTEN?
YEAH.
197
00:08:57,871 --> 00:09:00,007
ACTUALLY, I GO IN THE SUMMERS
TO VISIT FAMILY.
WOW.
198
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,208
OKAY, SO TELL ME,
199
00:09:01,241 --> 00:09:03,076
WHAT IS THE SCENE LIKE
IN TEHRAN?
200
00:09:03,110 --> 00:09:04,678
I JUST READ
THIS BIG ARTICLE
201
00:09:04,712 --> 00:09:06,614
ABOUT THE UNDERGROUND
HIP-HOP SCENE IN "VICE."
202
00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:08,982
YEAH.
SO, YOU'RE PART OF THAT?
203
00:09:09,016 --> 00:09:13,286
NO. UNFORTUNATELY, I SPEND
MOST OF MY TIME IN IRAN
204
00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:15,288
WATCHING DISNEY VIDEOS
WITH MY GRANDMOTHER
205
00:09:15,322 --> 00:09:17,124
WHILE SHE
UNTANGLES JEWELRY.
206
00:09:20,327 --> 00:09:21,895
YEAH, I GOT MYSELF
SOME COFFEE.
207
00:09:21,929 --> 00:09:22,930
DO YOU WANT SOMETHING
TO DRINK?
208
00:09:22,963 --> 00:09:23,964
NO, THANKS.
209
00:09:23,997 --> 00:09:26,967
I AM BUZZED ON SKUNK
RIGHT NOW.
210
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,135
NICE.
211
00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:30,704
SO, CRYSTAL TELLS ME
YOU ARE AN ARTIST.
212
00:09:30,738 --> 00:09:32,305
YES.
213
00:09:32,339 --> 00:09:33,974
YEAH, I AM.
214
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:35,142
YOU'RE A VIDEO ARTIST.
215
00:09:35,175 --> 00:09:36,944
MM-HMM.
GREAT.
216
00:09:36,977 --> 00:09:38,712
SO, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT CRYSTAL HAS TOLD YOU,
217
00:09:38,746 --> 00:09:41,849
BUT I'M LOOKING FOR SOMEONE
RELIABLE TO TAKE OVER
218
00:09:41,882 --> 00:09:44,284
AN AFTERSCHOOL
FILMMAKING CLASS.
219
00:09:44,317 --> 00:09:47,688
IT'S WITH A BUNCH OF KIDS,
AND THEY'RE REALLY GREAT
220
00:09:47,721 --> 00:09:50,357
AND SO SMART
AND, UH, JUST CREATIVE.
221
00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:51,892
AND REALLY,
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
222
00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:53,293
IS JUST SHOW THEM
HOW TO HOLD A CAMERA.
223
00:09:53,326 --> 00:09:55,062
I CAN DO THAT, YEAH.
224
00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:56,864
SO, WHAT IS
YOUR SCHEDULE LIKE?
225
00:09:56,897 --> 00:09:59,867
COMPLETELY OPEN.
PERFECT.
226
00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:02,135
ALL RIGHT, WELL,
MAY I SAY LET'S DO THIS?
227
00:10:02,169 --> 00:10:04,337
OKAY.
GREAT.
228
00:10:04,371 --> 00:10:06,039
DON'T FUCK ME OVER.
229
00:10:06,073 --> 00:10:07,741
OKAY.
230
00:10:09,242 --> 00:10:10,377
YOU TOLD HIM
I WAS A FILMMAKER?
231
00:10:10,410 --> 00:10:12,145
YOU SAID
YOU NEEDED A JOB.
232
00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:13,881
HOW DO YOU KNOW
THIS GUY ANYWAY?
233
00:10:13,914 --> 00:10:16,016
HE'S THAT INVESTMENT BANKER
IN MY PARENTS' BUILDING
234
00:10:16,049 --> 00:10:17,751
I USED TO HOOK UP WITH
IN HIGH SCHOOL.
235
00:10:17,785 --> 00:10:19,419
OH, MY GOD.
HE'S THAT GUY.
MM-HMM.
236
00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:22,790
YEAH, SO HE LOST HIS JOB,
BECAME A STAY-AT-HOME DAD,
237
00:10:22,823 --> 00:10:24,157
AND GOT INTO LIGHT DRUGS.
238
00:10:24,191 --> 00:10:25,258
GOOD FOR HIM.
239
00:10:25,292 --> 00:10:26,827
SO, DO YOU HAVE
A LESSON PLAN?
240
00:10:26,860 --> 00:10:28,228
WHAT IS THIS, GERMANY?
241
00:10:28,261 --> 00:10:29,429
THEY'RE PARK SLOPE TEENS.
242
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:30,931
I COULD LOCK 'EM IN A ROOM
243
00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:32,165
WITH A HALF-EATEN APPLE
AND A TIC TAC
244
00:10:32,199 --> 00:10:33,366
AND COME BACK
TO THE "MONA LISA."
245
00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:34,868
WH-- WHY ARE WE STOPPING?
246
00:10:34,902 --> 00:10:36,103
OH, I HAVE TO TAKE CARE
OF SOMETHING.
247
00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:37,437
YOU WAIT OUT HERE.
NO, NO, NO, WAIT.
248
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:38,972
OH, PLEASE DON'T DO THIS.
249
00:10:39,006 --> 00:10:41,174
YOU SAID THAT NO AMOUNT
OF WHOLESALE SPELT SUSHI
250
00:10:41,208 --> 00:10:43,811
WAS WORTH THE EMOTIONAL TOLL
OF BEING HERE.
251
00:10:43,844 --> 00:10:45,378
SHE'S HERE ALL THE TIME.
252
00:10:45,412 --> 00:10:49,049
THEY DON'T EVEN OFFER
PAPER BAGS.
253
00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:52,452
IT'S SURPRISING HOW,
UH, LONELY IT GETS
254
00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:54,454
WHEN YOU'RE SINGLE AGAIN,
255
00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:55,989
ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU LIVE
WITH SOMEONE.
256
00:10:56,023 --> 00:10:57,725
YOU GET SO USED
TO THEIR HABITS
257
00:10:57,758 --> 00:10:59,259
AND THEIR LIFESTYLE
AND THEIR SMELLS,
258
00:10:59,292 --> 00:11:01,795
BUT, UM, I REALLY
JOINED THE CO-OP
259
00:11:01,829 --> 00:11:03,363
TO SPEND TIME WITH HER,
'CAUSE, LET'S BE HONEST,
260
00:11:03,396 --> 00:11:06,099
IT'S NOT THE MOST PLEASANT
PLACE TO WORK IN THE WORLD.
261
00:11:06,133 --> 00:11:08,335
BUT IF I REALLY WANT MAXINE
BACK IN MY LIFE,
262
00:11:08,368 --> 00:11:10,270
I'M GONNA HAVE TO DO
WHATEVER IT TAKES,
263
00:11:10,303 --> 00:11:12,405
AND THAT MEANS GETTING BACK
ONTO HER CO-OP SHIFT,
264
00:11:12,439 --> 00:11:14,875
AND THAT'S
WHERE YOU COME IN.
265
00:11:14,908 --> 00:11:16,710
IT-- IT SAYS IN YOUR FILE
266
00:11:16,744 --> 00:11:19,046
THAT YOU HAVEN'T WORKED
A SHIFT IN FOUR MONTHS.
267
00:11:19,079 --> 00:11:20,480
EXTENUATING
CIRCUMSTANCES.
268
00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:22,449
I'VE HAD A VERY
BROKEN HEART.
269
00:11:23,984 --> 00:11:26,153
LOOK, ALL MEMBERS
ARE ENTITLED
270
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:28,188
TO ONE FREE PASS
AFTER A DELINQUENCY,
271
00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:30,190
BUT I CANNOT GET YOU
ONTO HER SHIFT.
272
00:11:30,223 --> 00:11:31,324
IT'S ALL BOOKED.
273
00:11:34,394 --> 00:11:36,229
I'M SORRY,
I DIDN'T CATCH YOUR NAME.
274
00:11:36,263 --> 00:11:37,364
JACKIE.
275
00:11:37,397 --> 00:11:38,966
HI, JACKIE.
276
00:11:38,999 --> 00:11:40,834
UM...
277
00:11:40,868 --> 00:11:45,105
THE LAST TIME I CHECKED,
THIS IS A COOPERATIVE.
278
00:11:45,138 --> 00:11:47,440
WHY DON'T YOU GO AHEAD
AND COOPERATE WITH ME,
279
00:11:47,474 --> 00:11:49,877
AND I'LL COOPERATE
WITH YOU.
280
00:11:52,412 --> 00:11:55,315
BUT HOW DO YOU GET THEM
SO CURLY?
281
00:11:55,348 --> 00:11:56,449
LET'S GO.
282
00:11:56,483 --> 00:11:58,786
IT WAS SO NICE
MEETING YOU.
283
00:11:58,819 --> 00:12:01,989
*
284
00:12:15,035 --> 00:12:16,770
SHIRIN TOLD ME
YOU'RE AN ARTIST.
285
00:12:16,804 --> 00:12:18,471
LANDSCAPING
OR PORTRAITS?
286
00:12:18,505 --> 00:12:21,074
I SPECIALIZE IN
EXPERIMENTAL INSTALLATIONS,
287
00:12:21,108 --> 00:12:23,443
AND JACQUES IS CURRENTLY
FOCUSING ON SANDCASTLE WORK
288
00:12:23,476 --> 00:12:26,013
INTEGRATING
FOUND OBJECTS.
289
00:12:26,046 --> 00:12:27,547
[SHIRIN]
WE'RE DONE WITH THE BOXES.
290
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:28,949
I'M COMING.
291
00:12:28,982 --> 00:12:30,483
IT WAS SO NICE
MEETING YOU.
292
00:12:32,052 --> 00:12:33,987
THERE'S NO TOILET PAPER.
293
00:12:38,125 --> 00:12:39,793
HEY, YOU GUYS CAN GO.
294
00:12:39,827 --> 00:12:41,028
I FEEL LIKE I'M 17
295
00:12:41,061 --> 00:12:42,262
AND YOU'RE MOVING ME
BACK INTO COLLEGE.
296
00:12:42,295 --> 00:12:45,198
I WISH.
THAT DORM WAS MUCH NICER.
297
00:12:45,232 --> 00:12:46,433
THIS IS WHAT IT IS
TO FIND A PLACE
298
00:12:46,466 --> 00:12:48,368
ON SHORT NOTICE
IN BROOKLYN.
299
00:12:48,401 --> 00:12:50,337
AT LEAST YOU HAVE
A SEXY ROOMMATE.
300
00:12:50,370 --> 00:12:53,273
FELICIA? I FIND HER
A BIT TERRIFYING.
301
00:12:53,306 --> 00:12:56,243
NO, I'M TALKING ABOUT
THE BOY-- JACQUES.
302
00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:58,478
YOUR NEW ROOMMATES
ARE FREAKS.
303
00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:00,413
HEY, IS THIS
HOW YOU SAY HELLO?
304
00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:01,949
HI.
305
00:13:01,982 --> 00:13:03,383
CAN WE TELL HER?
306
00:13:03,416 --> 00:13:04,551
TELL ME WHAT?
307
00:13:04,584 --> 00:13:06,419
I'M PROPOSING
TO LAYLI.
308
00:13:06,453 --> 00:13:07,454
WHY?
309
00:13:07,487 --> 00:13:09,089
HEY.
SHIRIN.
310
00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:10,390
I'M NOT SAYING
YOU SHOULDN'T DO IT.
311
00:13:10,423 --> 00:13:12,192
IT'S JUST...
312
00:13:12,225 --> 00:13:14,194
HE'S VERY YOUNG.
HE'S 33.
313
00:13:14,227 --> 00:13:16,096
I WAS ONLY 19
WHEN I MARRIED YOUR FATHER.
314
00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:18,899
WELL, THIS ISN'T THE ISLAMIC
REPUBLIC OF IRAN, MOM.
315
00:13:18,932 --> 00:13:20,267
DO YOU SEE A HIJAB
ON MY HEAD?
316
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:21,869
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
NOTHING.
317
00:13:21,902 --> 00:13:23,370
YOU'RE ACTING LIKE A BRAT.
STOP IT.
318
00:13:23,403 --> 00:13:24,404
YOU'RE BRINGING
A LOT OF NEGATIVE ENERGY
319
00:13:24,437 --> 00:13:25,839
INTO MY NEW HOME.
320
00:13:25,873 --> 00:13:27,274
[CHUCKLES]
OH, THIS IS NOT A HOME.
321
00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:28,408
THIS IS A REFUGEE CAMP.
322
00:13:28,441 --> 00:13:30,210
SERIOUSLY,
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
323
00:13:30,243 --> 00:13:31,912
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A COOL
BROOKLYN LOFT LOOKS LIKE.
324
00:13:31,945 --> 00:13:33,080
I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND
325
00:13:33,113 --> 00:13:34,447
WHY YOU LEFT
YOUR OLD APARTMENT.
326
00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:37,017
THE NEIGHBORHOOD
WAS SO MUCH BETTER.
327
00:13:37,050 --> 00:13:38,852
IT GOT TOO EXPENSIVE.
328
00:13:38,886 --> 00:13:40,253
WE WOULD HAVE HELPED YOU.
329
00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:42,189
THIS IS MY NEW HOME,
AND I LOVE IT.
330
00:13:42,222 --> 00:13:43,356
OKAY.
331
00:13:43,390 --> 00:13:45,625
ALI, COME.
HELP ME IN THE KITCHEN.
332
00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:47,594
OKAY, BUT I'M NOT
TOUCHING ANYTHING.
333
00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:50,063
I'M SURE THE GIRL
WHO LET ME IN HAS HEP C.
334
00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:56,236
DAD?
YEAH?
335
00:13:57,670 --> 00:13:59,306
I'M WORRIED ABOUT ALI.
336
00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:00,607
I THINK HE'S JUMPING
INTO MARRIAGE
337
00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:02,542
BECAUSE HE THINKS
HE HAS TO.
338
00:14:02,575 --> 00:14:04,077
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
339
00:14:04,111 --> 00:14:06,046
HE'S GOT CLASSIC
OLDER CHILD SYNDROME.
340
00:14:06,079 --> 00:14:08,115
HE'LL DO ANYTHING
TO MAKE YOU AND MOM HAPPY.
341
00:14:08,148 --> 00:14:10,183
[ALI]
SHE HAS NO GOALS
OR ASPIRATIONS.
342
00:14:10,217 --> 00:14:11,551
SHE TAKES NOTHING
SERIOUSLY.
343
00:14:11,584 --> 00:14:12,652
SHE'S BECOMING A LOSER.
344
00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:14,187
LOWER YOUR VOICE.
345
00:14:14,221 --> 00:14:16,323
SHE HAS THIS, LIKE,
YOUNGER CHILD THING.
346
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,158
I'M TELLING YOU,
YOU NEED TO BE ON TOP OF THAT.
347
00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:20,293
YOU DON'T THINK
I'M DOING MY BEST?
348
00:14:20,327 --> 00:14:21,428
SHE'S NOT EASY.
349
00:14:21,461 --> 00:14:23,330
HE'S, LIKE,
BURYING HIS EMOTIONS
350
00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:24,531
DEEP BENEATH THE SURFACE,
351
00:14:24,564 --> 00:14:26,466
AND, LIKE, ONE DAY,
HE COULD PULL A GUN
352
00:14:26,499 --> 00:14:28,001
ON HIS COWORKERS.
353
00:14:28,035 --> 00:14:29,202
I THINK SHE HAS
SELF-ESTEEM ISSUES.
354
00:14:29,236 --> 00:14:30,570
YEAH, NO KIDDING.
355
00:14:30,603 --> 00:14:32,505
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME
SHE HAD A BOYFRIEND?
356
00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:34,107
THAT VIRGINIA TECH KID
357
00:14:34,141 --> 00:14:37,277
WAS JUST TRYING TO PLEASE
HIS STRICT KOREAN PARENTS.
358
00:14:37,310 --> 00:14:39,146
IT'S NOT LIKE SHE'S DUMB
OR SUPER UNATTRACTIVE.
359
00:14:39,179 --> 00:14:40,613
I MEAN, SHE'S PERFECTLY
CAPABLE OF BEING NORMAL.
360
00:14:40,647 --> 00:14:42,349
I DON'T WANT HIM
TO FIND HIMSELF,
361
00:14:42,382 --> 00:14:43,616
LIKE, TEN YEARS FROM NOW,
362
00:14:43,650 --> 00:14:46,086
FAT, BALD,
AND IN A LOVELESS MARRIAGE
363
00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:47,287
BECAUSE HE WAS
RUSHING TO BECOME
364
00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:49,256
THE WORLD'S BEST
IRANIAN SON.
365
00:14:49,289 --> 00:14:52,092
THE MEN IN OUR FAMILY
DON'T GO BALD.
366
00:14:52,125 --> 00:14:53,493
*
367
00:14:53,526 --> 00:14:55,963
* SHE'S PLAYING HER GAME...
368
00:14:57,464 --> 00:14:59,599
OH, I DON'T NEED
NEW READING MATERIAL.
369
00:14:59,632 --> 00:15:01,234
I'M ONLY UP TO BOOK TWO
OF THE "TWILIGHT" SERIES.
370
00:15:01,268 --> 00:15:03,603
I'M BROADENING
YOUR HORIZONS.
371
00:15:05,605 --> 00:15:07,975
THIS IS SOME
PRETTY SERIOUS STUFF HERE.
372
00:15:08,008 --> 00:15:09,409
I'M ASKING YOU TO READ
SOME BOOKS.
373
00:15:09,442 --> 00:15:11,711
YOU DON'T NEED TO GET
YOUR SEPTUM PIERCED.
374
00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:13,313
YET.
375
00:15:13,346 --> 00:15:15,582
[CHUCKLES]
376
00:15:25,092 --> 00:15:26,526
[WOMAN SIGHS]
377
00:15:26,559 --> 00:15:28,228
OH, HEY.
378
00:15:28,261 --> 00:15:29,396
UM, EXCUSE ME,
379
00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:30,730
THIS IS ACTUALLY
THE BROOKLYN KIDS
380
00:15:30,763 --> 00:15:32,065
MOVIE MAKER CLASS.
381
00:15:32,099 --> 00:15:33,266
I THINK YOU HAVE
THE WRONG ROOM.
382
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:34,267
NO, THIS RIGHT.
383
00:15:34,301 --> 00:15:37,137
I'M A MOVIE DIRECTOR.
384
00:15:37,170 --> 00:15:39,006
SEE YOU AT FIVE.
385
00:15:46,113 --> 00:15:48,015
[CHILDREN CHATTERING]
386
00:15:52,452 --> 00:15:53,486
AND I'M GONNA POOP.
387
00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:55,522
[GIRL]
NO! DON'T!
388
00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:57,457
[LAUGHS]
389
00:15:57,490 --> 00:15:58,625
KUJO, COULD YOU
PLEASE HOLD--
390
00:15:58,658 --> 00:16:00,160
PUT DOWN THE TRUCK
AND HOLD THE CAMERA.
391
00:16:00,193 --> 00:16:01,261
STOP THROWING.
392
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:03,563
[TOYS BANGING, LOUD CHATTER]
393
00:16:03,596 --> 00:16:05,765
I DON'T THINK
YOU CAN FIT IT ALL.
394
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:09,269
HEY, KUJO, THE LENS IS
WAY TOO CLOSE TO YOUR BUTT.
395
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:11,571
[TOYS BANGING, CHATTER]
396
00:16:38,698 --> 00:16:40,500
[TYPING]
397
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:51,311
OH, YOU'RE ON OkCupid.
398
00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:53,613
MY TAXIDERMIST MET
HER HUSBAND ON THAT SITE.
399
00:16:53,646 --> 00:16:57,617
I'M JUST LOOKING FOR SOMEONE
TO MAKE MY GIRLFRIEND JEALOUS.
400
00:16:57,650 --> 00:16:59,086
WE'RE ON A BREAK.
401
00:16:59,119 --> 00:17:00,153
GOOD LUCK.
402
00:17:00,187 --> 00:17:02,155
FELICIA?
403
00:17:02,189 --> 00:17:03,490
YES?
404
00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:04,824
YOU'RE IN A LONG-TERM,
405
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:06,659
SEEMINGLY HEALTHY
RELATIONSHIP.
406
00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:10,497
CAN YOU TELL ME,
HOW DO PEOPLE MEET,
407
00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:12,499
AGREE THEY LIKE
EACH OTHER,
408
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:16,069
AND THEN... KEEP ON
LIKING EACH OTHER?
409
00:17:16,103 --> 00:17:18,305
SHARED INTERESTS?
410
00:17:18,338 --> 00:17:20,440
JACQUES AND I MET
AT OCCUPY CHELSEA.
411
00:17:22,242 --> 00:17:24,077
I'M GONNA LIE HERE
AND TRY TO FORGET
412
00:17:24,111 --> 00:17:26,513
WHAT IT FELT LIKE
TO BE LOVED.
413
00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:28,115
COULD YOU PLEASE
TURN OFF THE LIGHT?
414
00:17:29,416 --> 00:17:31,651
FEEL BETTER.
THANK YOU.
415
00:17:39,159 --> 00:17:41,060
*
416
00:17:47,667 --> 00:17:49,569
[CIGARETTE LIGHTER FLICKS]
417
00:17:56,376 --> 00:17:59,679
[MUFFLED POP MUSIC PLAYING]
418
00:17:59,712 --> 00:18:01,614
[DISTANT LAUGHTER]
419
00:18:04,451 --> 00:18:06,353
[MUFFLED CHATTER]
420
00:18:15,728 --> 00:18:17,464
HEY.
HI.
421
00:18:18,831 --> 00:18:20,700
YOU WANT A CIGARETTE?
I DON'T SMOKE.
422
00:18:20,733 --> 00:18:22,169
YEAH, ME NEITHER.
423
00:18:23,670 --> 00:18:25,438
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
OUT HERE?
424
00:18:25,472 --> 00:18:27,674
[SIGHS]
SOCIAL ANXIETY.
425
00:18:27,707 --> 00:18:29,842
WHAT ABOUT YOU?
426
00:18:29,876 --> 00:18:32,445
MORE OR LESS THE SAME.
[CHUCKLES]
427
00:18:32,479 --> 00:18:34,314
I'M SHIRIN.
428
00:18:34,347 --> 00:18:35,582
MAXINE.
429
00:18:38,551 --> 00:18:40,720
IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU.
430
00:18:40,753 --> 00:18:42,722
I LOVE DYKES.
431
00:18:42,755 --> 00:18:44,557
NICE.
432
00:18:44,591 --> 00:18:45,925
I MEAN IT.
433
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:49,329
YOU KNOW THAT-- THAT WORD
IS INCREDIBLY OFFENSIVE.
434
00:18:49,362 --> 00:18:51,398
OH, I'M BISEXUAL,
SO IT'S OKAY IF I SAY IT.
435
00:18:51,431 --> 00:18:53,166
NO, IT'S STILL OFFENSIVE.
[CHUCKLES]
436
00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:55,735
YOU KNOW HOW I MEANT IT.
437
00:18:55,768 --> 00:18:58,205
DOESN'T MATTER
HOW YOU MEANT IT.
438
00:18:58,238 --> 00:18:59,672
TOMATO, TO-MAH-TO.
439
00:19:01,241 --> 00:19:02,742
WHAT ARE YOU DRINKING?
440
00:19:02,775 --> 00:19:05,378
I FILLED THIS WATER BOTTLE
WITH TEQUILA.
441
00:19:05,412 --> 00:19:06,746
CLASSY.
442
00:19:06,779 --> 00:19:08,815
I'M DRINKING
WITH A PURPOSE.
443
00:19:08,848 --> 00:19:10,417
YEAH?
444
00:19:10,450 --> 00:19:12,252
[SIGHS] THIS GUY
WITH WHOM I RECENTLY
445
00:19:12,285 --> 00:19:15,788
HAD AN UNFORTUNATE SEXUAL
ENCOUNTER SHOWED UP,
446
00:19:15,822 --> 00:19:18,491
AND NOW I FEEL
UNCOMFORTABLE.
447
00:19:18,525 --> 00:19:20,227
I JUST HATE
THE WAY DUDES GET
448
00:19:20,260 --> 00:19:21,828
WHEN THEY CAN'T MAINTAIN
AN ERECTION.
449
00:19:21,861 --> 00:19:23,563
WHAT DO THEY GET LIKE?
450
00:19:23,596 --> 00:19:24,897
OH, ARE YOU A GOLD STAR?
451
00:19:24,931 --> 00:19:26,566
NO, I'VE HAD SEX WITH MEN,
452
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:30,237
JUST, UM, NOT THE KIND
WHO GO SOFT.
453
00:19:30,270 --> 00:19:32,239
TOUCHÉ.
454
00:19:32,272 --> 00:19:33,573
IT'S THE WORST.
455
00:19:33,606 --> 00:19:34,807
THEY SHUT DOWN,
456
00:19:34,841 --> 00:19:36,443
AND THEY GET
ALL MOPEY AND OFFENDED
457
00:19:36,476 --> 00:19:37,844
WHEN YOU MAKE JOKES.
458
00:19:37,877 --> 00:19:39,379
YEAH, IT'S SO WEIRD
THE WAY MEN DON'T ENJOY
459
00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:41,848
HUMOR AT THE EXPENSE
OF THEIR PENISES.
460
00:19:41,881 --> 00:19:44,251
DO YOU WANT SOME?
461
00:19:44,284 --> 00:19:45,552
SURE.
462
00:19:50,290 --> 00:19:51,591
I THINK YOU'RE HOT.
463
00:19:51,624 --> 00:19:52,992
THANKS.
464
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:55,228
I KNOW THAT I DON'T LOOK
LIKE I'M INTO GIRLS
465
00:19:55,262 --> 00:19:57,797
AND THAT I WAS JUST TALKING
ABOUT BEING A BONER KILLER,
466
00:19:57,830 --> 00:20:01,768
BUT I AM SUPER SEXY
AND SUPER INTO GIRLS.
467
00:20:01,801 --> 00:20:02,769
REALLY?
468
00:20:02,802 --> 00:20:03,803
YEAH.
469
00:20:03,836 --> 00:20:05,472
I LIKE GIRLS LIKE YOU.
470
00:20:05,505 --> 00:20:06,539
LIKE ME?
471
00:20:06,573 --> 00:20:07,940
YOU KNOW, LIKE, MANLY,
472
00:20:07,974 --> 00:20:09,942
BUT ALSO A LITTLE BIT
LIKE A LADY.
473
00:20:09,976 --> 00:20:12,545
NICE.
THANK YOU.
474
00:20:12,579 --> 00:20:14,614
UM... [CHUCKLES]
[CHUCKLES]
475
00:20:14,647 --> 00:20:17,484
ARE YOU HAVING
LADY PROBLEMS?
476
00:20:17,517 --> 00:20:19,686
WHAT MAKES YOU THINK
I'M HAVING LADY PROBLEMS?
477
00:20:19,719 --> 00:20:21,354
BECAUSE IT'S
NEW YEAR'S EVE
478
00:20:21,388 --> 00:20:23,423
AND YOU'RE HEADING OUT
BEFORE THE COUNTDOWN.
479
00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:24,791
MAYBE I'M HEADING OUT
480
00:20:24,824 --> 00:20:26,693
TO MEET THE PERSON
I'M GONNA KISS AT MIDNIGHT.
481
00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:28,328
YOU'RE GONNA BE
HELLA LATE
482
00:20:28,361 --> 00:20:30,463
'CAUSE IT'S LIKE,
TWO MINUTES AWAY.
483
00:20:32,665 --> 00:20:34,734
WHAT'S HER NAME?
LINDA.
484
00:20:34,767 --> 00:20:37,470
SHE SOUNDS LIKE A CUNT.
485
00:20:37,504 --> 00:20:38,638
WE'RE GOING OUT
FOR A COUPLE MONTHS,
486
00:20:38,671 --> 00:20:39,772
AND WE DECIDED
TO MOVE IN TOGETHER.
487
00:20:39,806 --> 00:20:41,007
NATURALLY.
488
00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:43,310
AND FOUR DAYS
AFTER I BREAK MY LEASE
489
00:20:43,343 --> 00:20:44,744
AND SELL EVERYTHING I OWN,
490
00:20:44,777 --> 00:20:45,912
SHE TELLS ME
SHE MISSES HER EX,
491
00:20:45,945 --> 00:20:47,280
AND WHAT THE FUCK
AM I SUPPOSED TO DO
492
00:20:47,314 --> 00:20:48,348
WITH THAT INFORMATION?
493
00:20:48,381 --> 00:20:49,916
THAT SUCKS.
494
00:20:49,949 --> 00:20:52,519
JUST HAVING TROUBLE DEALING
WITH, LIKE, BROOKLYN PARTIES
495
00:20:52,552 --> 00:20:55,788
AND EVERYONE TALKING ABOUT
THEIR KICKSTARTER CAMPAIGNS,
496
00:20:55,822 --> 00:20:58,591
AND DID YOU SEE THAT GUY
WITH THE WAXED DALI MUSTACHE?
497
00:20:58,625 --> 00:21:00,327
I MEAN, WHAT THE FUCK
IS THAT GUY'S PROBLEM?
498
00:21:00,360 --> 00:21:02,795
WHO THE FUCK
DOES HE THINK HE IS?
499
00:21:02,829 --> 00:21:06,666
I FIND YOUR ANGER
INCREDIBLY SEXY.
500
00:21:06,699 --> 00:21:08,801
REALLY?
501
00:21:08,835 --> 00:21:11,504
I HATE
SO MANY THINGS TOO.
502
00:21:35,462 --> 00:21:36,563
WOW.
503
00:21:36,596 --> 00:21:37,697
KEN. HI.
504
00:21:37,730 --> 00:21:39,599
OH! HEY, HI.
HOW ARE YOU?
505
00:21:39,632 --> 00:21:40,733
I'M GOOD, THANK YOU.
506
00:21:40,767 --> 00:21:42,902
CARRINGTON,
THIS IS SHAYLA.
507
00:21:42,935 --> 00:21:44,070
I'M SHIRIN. HI.
508
00:21:44,103 --> 00:21:45,405
OH...
509
00:21:45,438 --> 00:21:46,439
SORRY, MAN.
I'M STONED.
510
00:21:46,473 --> 00:21:47,707
OH, THAT'S OKAY.
511
00:21:47,740 --> 00:21:50,577
WANT A J?
NO, I'M COOL.
THANKS.
512
00:21:50,610 --> 00:21:52,912
LISTEN, UM...
513
00:21:52,945 --> 00:21:54,447
I'M A TERRIBLE TEACHER.
514
00:21:54,481 --> 00:21:56,015
NO.
515
00:21:56,048 --> 00:21:57,950
YES, I AM.
516
00:21:57,984 --> 00:21:59,752
UH, THE KIDS HATE ME.
517
00:21:59,786 --> 00:22:00,953
THEY'RE A GOOD
TEN YEARS YOUNGER
518
00:22:00,987 --> 00:22:02,054
THAN I THOUGHT
THEY'D BE,
519
00:22:02,088 --> 00:22:03,590
AND I CAN'T GET THEM
TO LISTEN.
520
00:22:03,623 --> 00:22:04,957
YOU CAN'T TAKE IT
PERSONALLY, DUDE.
521
00:22:04,991 --> 00:22:06,092
THEY'RE FIVE.
522
00:22:06,125 --> 00:22:08,027
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT I'M DOING.
523
00:22:08,060 --> 00:22:09,629
I HAVE THREE KIDS.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.
524
00:22:09,662 --> 00:22:11,864
IT'S JUST FAKE IT
'TIL YOU MAKE IT.
525
00:22:11,898 --> 00:22:14,701
I'VE LOST CARRINGTON,
LIKE, WHAT, FOUR TIMES?
526
00:22:14,734 --> 00:22:15,835
RIGHT, BRO?
527
00:22:18,571 --> 00:22:21,608
JUST DO YOUR BEST, OKAY?
528
00:22:21,641 --> 00:22:22,975
OKAY.
529
00:22:24,511 --> 00:22:26,413
HEY.
530
00:22:26,446 --> 00:22:29,416
I BELIEVE IN YOU, CHER.
531
00:22:29,449 --> 00:22:30,883
THANK YOU.
532
00:22:36,188 --> 00:22:38,525
[MAXINE]
THEY HAVE NO IDEA
YOU'RE BISEXUAL?
533
00:22:38,558 --> 00:22:41,160
[SHIRIN]
I'M SORRY, WHAT COUNTRY IS IT
THAT YOU GET STONED TO DEATH
534
00:22:41,193 --> 00:22:42,962
IF YOU'RE CONVICTED
OF BEING GAY?
535
00:22:42,995 --> 00:22:44,497
OH, YEAH.
WAIT, I KNOW.
536
00:22:44,531 --> 00:22:45,998
IT'S IRAN,
537
00:22:46,032 --> 00:22:48,100
THE COUNTRY THAT MY
ENTIRE FAMILY COMES FROM.
538
00:22:48,134 --> 00:22:49,936
YOU CAN'T KEEP PLAYING
THE PERSIAN CARD
539
00:22:49,969 --> 00:22:51,571
EVERY TIME
WE HAVE AN ARGUMENT.
540
00:22:51,604 --> 00:22:53,072
YOU NEED TO SEE
FOR YOURSELF
541
00:22:53,105 --> 00:22:54,974
HOW DIFFICULT IT IS TO BE
THE CHILD OF IMMIGRANTS.
542
00:22:55,007 --> 00:22:56,909
I WOULD LOVE TO.
GREAT.
543
00:22:56,943 --> 00:22:58,645
THEN YOU'RE COMING
TO A PERSIAN NEW YEAR PARTY
544
00:22:58,678 --> 00:23:00,913
THIS WEEKEND IN NEW JERSEY.
545
00:23:00,947 --> 00:23:03,516
AM I COMING AS YOUR DATE?
GOD, NO.
546
00:23:03,550 --> 00:23:05,452
YOU'RE DEFINITELY COMING
AS MY WHITE FRIEND.
547
00:23:05,485 --> 00:23:06,953
DO YOU THINK
I HAVE A DEATH WISH?
548
00:23:08,721 --> 00:23:10,423
YOU KNOW YOU'RE GONNA
HAVE TO WEAR A DRESS.
549
00:23:10,457 --> 00:23:11,458
NO.
550
00:23:11,491 --> 00:23:12,792
*
551
00:23:12,825 --> 00:23:15,094
[CHATTER]
552
00:23:17,764 --> 00:23:20,433
GOOD. NOW YOU'RE
GONNA SEND 'EM?
YES.
553
00:23:20,467 --> 00:23:21,968
[INAUDIBLE]
554
00:23:24,236 --> 00:23:26,773
[MAXINE]
IT'S LIKE WE JUST STEPPED
INTO LIBERACE'S WET DREAM.
555
00:23:26,806 --> 00:23:28,908
ISN'T IT SPECTACULAR?
556
00:23:28,941 --> 00:23:30,710
YOU KNOW I DON'T LIKE
BEING IN ENCLOSED SPACES
557
00:23:30,743 --> 00:23:32,745
WHERE I CAN'T DETECT
ANY VISIBLY GAY PEOPLE.
558
00:23:32,779 --> 00:23:34,146
WELL, I'M PRETTY SURE
UNCLE NEEMA'S HARBORING
559
00:23:34,180 --> 00:23:36,949
SOME BI-CURIOUS
TENDENCIES.
560
00:23:36,983 --> 00:23:39,118
YOU TALK TO HIM
ABOUT IT?
OH, GOD, NO.
561
00:23:39,151 --> 00:23:40,953
PERSIANS COMMUNICATE
MOSTLY THROUGH GOSSIP.
562
00:23:40,987 --> 00:23:42,955
[WOMAN]
SHIRIN?
563
00:23:42,989 --> 00:23:44,123
OH, MY GOD! HI!
564
00:23:44,156 --> 00:23:46,726
HI!
HI!
565
00:23:54,534 --> 00:23:57,604
MAXINE, THIS IS MITRA,
YASSI, MEENU, AND YASSI.
566
00:23:57,637 --> 00:23:59,105
GUYS, THIS IS
MY FRIEND MAXINE.
567
00:23:59,138 --> 00:24:00,707
HEY.
568
00:24:00,740 --> 00:24:03,610
HEY. OH, MY GOD,
YOU LOOK AMAZING.
569
00:24:03,643 --> 00:24:06,212
RIGHT. NEXT TO YOU, I LOOK
LIKE A BUSBOY FROM CHILI'S.
570
00:24:06,245 --> 00:24:09,248
OH, NO WAY.
YOU'RE PRACTICALLY A MODEL.
571
00:24:09,281 --> 00:24:10,583
YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT.
572
00:24:10,617 --> 00:24:11,951
LIKE A "BEFORE" MODEL
FOR ACCUTANE.
573
00:24:11,984 --> 00:24:14,153
UH, I WOULD KILL
FOR YOUR HEIGHT.
574
00:24:14,186 --> 00:24:16,789
AND I WOULD SELL MY FIRSTBORN
FOR YOUR SKIN.
575
00:24:16,823 --> 00:24:18,525
STOP IT.
576
00:24:18,558 --> 00:24:20,493
YOU STOP IT.
[LAUGHS]
577
00:24:20,527 --> 00:24:22,495
WE NEED TO
GET TOGETHER MORE.
578
00:24:22,529 --> 00:24:24,531
I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU SINCE
YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S FUNERAL.
579
00:24:24,564 --> 00:24:25,598
HOW'S YOUR FATHER?
580
00:24:25,632 --> 00:24:26,933
YOU KNOW, HE'S OKAY,
581
00:24:26,966 --> 00:24:28,968
BUT THEN SOMETIMES
HE'LL CRY OUT OF NOWHERE,
582
00:24:29,001 --> 00:24:30,870
AND I'LL BE LIKE,
"DAD, WHAT'S GOING ON WITH YOU?
583
00:24:30,903 --> 00:24:32,138
YOU'RE EMASCULATING
YOURSELF."
584
00:24:32,171 --> 00:24:33,973
OH, MY GOD! ROYA?
[WOMEN SHRIEKING]
585
00:24:38,678 --> 00:24:39,912
WHAT JUST HAPPENED?
586
00:24:39,946 --> 00:24:41,080
YOU WERE IN THE MIDDLE
OF A SENTENCE.
587
00:24:41,113 --> 00:24:42,148
YEAH, EVERY TIME
I SEE HER,
588
00:24:42,181 --> 00:24:43,916
SHE COMPLIMENTS
THE WAY I LOOK,
589
00:24:43,950 --> 00:24:45,718
SHE ASKS
ONE PERSONAL QUESTION,
590
00:24:45,752 --> 00:24:48,020
AND THEN SHE WALKS AWAY
WHILE I ANSWER.
591
00:24:48,054 --> 00:24:50,189
AND WHO'S SHE
TALKING TO NOW?
THAT'S ROYA.
592
00:24:50,222 --> 00:24:53,893
HER FATHER JUST MADE A LOT
OF MONEY IMPORTING SAMOVARS.
593
00:24:53,926 --> 00:24:55,094
LET'S GET A DRINK.
594
00:24:55,127 --> 00:24:56,563
WHEN ARE THEY
SERVING DINNER?
595
00:24:56,596 --> 00:24:57,964
MIDNIGHT.
596
00:24:57,997 --> 00:24:59,098
SERIOUSLY?
597
00:24:59,131 --> 00:25:00,600
GOD, YOU KNOW,
I SHOULD HAVE TALKED
598
00:25:00,633 --> 00:25:02,769
ABOUT HER DAD'S
COSMETIC DENTAL PRACTICE.
599
00:25:02,802 --> 00:25:04,236
YOU WERE BEING HONEST.
600
00:25:04,270 --> 00:25:06,739
DO YOU THINK THEY WANT YOU
TO BE HONEST AT THESE THINGS?
601
00:25:06,773 --> 00:25:08,641
OH, GET A GRIP.
YOU'RE A GROWN WOMAN.
602
00:25:08,675 --> 00:25:10,843
YOU'VE BEEN TO HOW MANY
PARTIES IN YOUR LIFE?
603
00:25:10,877 --> 00:25:12,144
I DON'T KNOW.
A LOT.
604
00:25:12,178 --> 00:25:13,212
AND WHAT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT
PART
605
00:25:13,245 --> 00:25:15,314
OF HAVING A GOOD
TIME AT A PARTY?
606
00:25:15,347 --> 00:25:17,049
DRINKING.
AND?
607
00:25:17,083 --> 00:25:18,585
DANCING.
608
00:25:18,618 --> 00:25:20,653
AND WHO'S VERY GOOD
AT BOTH OF THOSE THINGS?
609
00:25:20,687 --> 00:25:23,189
I AM.
[CHUCKLES]
THAT'S RIGHT.
610
00:25:23,222 --> 00:25:26,025
TWO VODKA TONICS,
PLEASE.
611
00:25:26,058 --> 00:25:29,095
*
612
00:26:00,927 --> 00:26:02,294
[LAUGHS]
613
00:26:13,873 --> 00:26:15,307
[LAUGHS]
614
00:26:15,341 --> 00:26:16,943
[SHIRIN]
THAT WAS AMAZING.
615
00:26:16,976 --> 00:26:18,645
I'VE NEVER HAD SO MUCH FUN
AROUND PERSIANS BEFORE.
616
00:26:18,678 --> 00:26:20,112
I'M SORRY, I KNOW YOU'RE
HAVING A BREAKTHROUGH,
617
00:26:20,146 --> 00:26:21,781
BUT CAN YOU FIRST EXPLAIN
TO ME THIS FIRE THING?
618
00:26:21,814 --> 00:26:22,882
[CHUCKLES]
YEAH.
619
00:26:22,915 --> 00:26:24,751
SO, THE WEDNESDAY
BEFORE NORUZ,
620
00:26:24,784 --> 00:26:25,952
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO
JUMP OVER FIRE
621
00:26:25,985 --> 00:26:28,788
TO EXORCISE YOURSELF
OF EVIL SPIRITS
622
00:26:28,821 --> 00:26:30,289
AND START THE NEW YEAR
FRESH.
623
00:26:30,322 --> 00:26:32,191
ONLY WE'RE DOING IT NOW
'CAUSE EVERYONE HAD WORK
624
00:26:32,224 --> 00:26:33,926
AND WE'RE
HALF-ASSED IRANIANS.
625
00:26:33,960 --> 00:26:36,929
GOD, IT'S SUCH
A BEAUTIFUL GESTURE.
626
00:26:36,963 --> 00:26:38,297
UGH, YOU ARE
TOTALLY HAVING
627
00:26:38,330 --> 00:26:40,366
ONE OF THOSE "I'M DATING
AN IMMIGRANT" MOMENTS.
628
00:26:40,399 --> 00:26:42,234
LIKE, "ISN'T LEARNING
ABOUT OTHER CULTURES
629
00:26:42,268 --> 00:26:44,303
SO FUN AND ENRICHING?
I FEEL LIKE I'M--"
630
00:26:44,336 --> 00:26:45,972
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
631
00:26:46,005 --> 00:26:48,274
HI.
HI.
632
00:26:48,307 --> 00:26:50,042
SO, THIS IS
WHERE YOU'VE BEEN?
633
00:26:50,076 --> 00:26:51,210
YEAH.
634
00:26:51,243 --> 00:26:53,212
WE JUST CAME OUT HERE.
WHERE WERE YOU?
635
00:26:53,245 --> 00:26:55,014
[SCOFFS]
YOUR FATHER GOT LOST.
636
00:26:55,047 --> 00:26:56,683
I TOOK THE SCENIC ROUTE.
637
00:26:56,716 --> 00:26:58,785
THAT'S NOT FUNNY.
638
00:26:58,818 --> 00:27:00,352
THIS IS MAXINE,
MY FRIEND.
639
00:27:00,386 --> 00:27:02,722
MAXINE, MEET MY PARENTS.
HI.
640
00:27:02,755 --> 00:27:04,657
HI, MAXINE. OH.
641
00:27:04,691 --> 00:27:06,759
[KISSING]
642
00:27:06,793 --> 00:27:08,795
HI.
643
00:27:08,828 --> 00:27:10,229
SO, HOW DO YOU
LIKE NORUZ?
644
00:27:10,262 --> 00:27:12,098
I'M SO SORRY.
I THINK I LEFT MY PURSE INSIDE.
645
00:27:12,131 --> 00:27:13,199
I GOT TO GO RUN
AND GET IT.
646
00:27:13,232 --> 00:27:14,967
I WILL SEE YOU
REALLY SOON.
647
00:27:15,001 --> 00:27:16,903
NICE TO MEET YOU BOTH.
[CHUCKLE]S
648
00:27:16,936 --> 00:27:19,038
NICE TO MEET YOU.
NICE TO MEET YOU.
649
00:27:19,071 --> 00:27:20,873
*
650
00:27:50,803 --> 00:27:51,904
[TYPING]
651
00:28:21,267 --> 00:28:24,203
[TYPING]
652
00:28:29,341 --> 00:28:32,444
IT SAYS ON YOUR PROFILE
THAT YOU'RE AN ARTIST.
653
00:28:32,478 --> 00:28:35,181
YEAH, I DO A
STAND-UP/FOLK MUSIC HYBRID ACT.
654
00:28:37,416 --> 00:28:39,185
I HAVE NEVER HEARD
OF THAT.
655
00:28:39,218 --> 00:28:42,188
YEAH, MY ART
DEFIES LABELS.
656
00:28:42,221 --> 00:28:43,389
SOUNDS LIKE IT.
657
00:28:43,422 --> 00:28:44,824
WHY DOES COMEDY
ALWAYS HAVE TO
658
00:28:44,857 --> 00:28:46,425
BE SO MEAN AND AT
SOMEBODY'S EXPENSE?
659
00:28:46,458 --> 00:28:47,894
I WANT TO USE MY COMEDY
660
00:28:47,927 --> 00:28:49,829
TO BRING ATTENTION
TO SOCIAL-JUSTICE ISSUES.
661
00:28:53,900 --> 00:28:55,034
YOU'RE VERY PRETTY.
662
00:28:56,435 --> 00:28:57,736
THANK YOU.
663
00:28:59,906 --> 00:29:02,374
WHY DON'T YOU GET TO WORK
ON THAT DRINK?
664
00:29:08,414 --> 00:29:09,882
[CHUCKLES]
665
00:29:25,331 --> 00:29:26,899
CAN I GET A GLASS
OF WATER?
666
00:29:26,933 --> 00:29:28,100
COME HERE.
667
00:29:31,938 --> 00:29:33,305
CLOSER.
668
00:29:38,610 --> 00:29:41,848
YOU HAVE
REALLY NICE HAIR.
669
00:29:41,881 --> 00:29:42,982
THANKS.
670
00:29:56,228 --> 00:29:58,064
YOU CAN BE ROUGH WITH ME.
671
00:30:21,921 --> 00:30:23,822
TELL ME WHAT
YOU WANT ME TO DO.
672
00:30:25,992 --> 00:30:27,259
LIE ON THE BED.
673
00:30:27,293 --> 00:30:28,827
OKAY.
674
00:30:55,621 --> 00:30:58,257
[GRUNTS]
675
00:30:58,290 --> 00:31:00,192
*
676
00:31:07,699 --> 00:31:10,602
[WOMAN SINGING
IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
677
00:31:25,717 --> 00:31:28,254
[SOFT MOANING,
TELEPHONE RINGING]
678
00:31:28,287 --> 00:31:31,157
FUCK! [GROANS]
COULD YOU PUT THESE ON?
679
00:31:31,190 --> 00:31:33,159
WHAT? YOU'RE-- YOU'RE THE ONE
WHO WANTED WEED.
680
00:31:33,192 --> 00:31:34,560
WELL, I REEK OF SEX.
681
00:31:34,593 --> 00:31:36,395
IT'S GONNA TRIGGER
THE DRUG DEALER'S BRAIN
682
00:31:36,428 --> 00:31:38,497
TO CALL IN
HIS RAPIST BRAIN.
683
00:31:38,530 --> 00:31:40,566
YOU'RE LUCKY
I VEER MACHO.
684
00:31:42,401 --> 00:31:44,103
THANK YOU.
685
00:31:46,272 --> 00:31:47,506
[SOFT GROAN]
686
00:32:25,677 --> 00:32:28,647
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
687
00:32:32,218 --> 00:32:33,352
YOU'RE AMAZING.
688
00:32:39,425 --> 00:32:40,959
[HUMS]
689
00:32:47,766 --> 00:32:49,668
LADIES FIRST.
690
00:33:05,117 --> 00:33:07,319
I'M NOT SO GOOD AT
SMOKING WEED AROUND PEOPLE.
691
00:33:11,357 --> 00:33:13,392
CAN'T HOLD MY THOUGHTS STILL
LONG ENOUGH TO THINK THEM.
692
00:33:13,425 --> 00:33:15,361
I HAVE TO CHASE THEM.
693
00:33:15,394 --> 00:33:16,728
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.
694
00:33:16,762 --> 00:33:18,464
THE OTHER DAY,
I HAD A REALLY GOOD IDEA
695
00:33:18,497 --> 00:33:21,233
FOR A CHILDREN'S BOOK
WHILE I WAS SMOKING WEED,
696
00:33:21,267 --> 00:33:23,402
AND NOW I HAVE NO IDEA
WHAT IT WAS.
697
00:33:23,435 --> 00:33:25,471
KEEP SMOKING.
YOU'LL GET IT BACK.
698
00:33:30,376 --> 00:33:32,144
HAVE YOU EVER SEEN THAT EPISODE
OF "SEX AND THE CITY"
699
00:33:32,178 --> 00:33:34,746
WHERE CARRIE HAS TO PITCH
A BOOK FOR CHILDREN
700
00:33:34,780 --> 00:33:36,182
AND SHE PITCHES
THIS IDEA
701
00:33:36,215 --> 00:33:37,683
ABOUT A LITTLE GIRL
WITH MAGIC CIGARETTES?
702
00:33:37,716 --> 00:33:39,185
AND IT'S REALLY FUNNY.
[CHUCKLES]
703
00:33:39,218 --> 00:33:40,819
I HATE
"SEX AND THE CITY."
704
00:33:40,852 --> 00:33:42,221
YEAH, BUT YOU
HAVE TO ADMIT
705
00:33:42,254 --> 00:33:44,556
IT'S PRETTY FUCKING
ENTERTAINING.
706
00:33:44,590 --> 00:33:46,058
I THINK IT'S BORING.
707
00:33:46,092 --> 00:33:48,460
WHO THE FUCK
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?
708
00:33:50,396 --> 00:33:52,531
OH, MY GOD, ARE YOU
INTO "LORD OF THE RINGS"?
709
00:33:52,564 --> 00:33:54,333
YOU KNOW,
THE OLDER MY DAD GETS,
710
00:33:54,366 --> 00:33:55,701
THE MORE HE LOOKS LIKE GOLLUM
FROM "LORD OF THE RINGS."
711
00:33:55,734 --> 00:33:57,703
[CHUCKLES]
712
00:33:57,736 --> 00:34:00,372
MY DAD, HE'S ALWAYS
MAKING THE WORST JOKES,
713
00:34:00,406 --> 00:34:03,409
BUT THEN THIS ONE TIME
HE LOST HIS WEDDING RING,
714
00:34:03,442 --> 00:34:04,610
AND HE WAS LIKE...
715
00:34:04,643 --> 00:34:06,712
[IMITATING GOLLUM]
"I NEED MY PRECIOUS."
716
00:34:06,745 --> 00:34:09,381
AND WAS LITERALLY THE FUNNIEST
THING I'D EVER HEARD.
717
00:34:09,415 --> 00:34:11,383
WHEN I WENT TO SEE
THE FILM "PRECIOUS,"
718
00:34:11,417 --> 00:34:13,519
THERE WAS A MENTALLY HANDICAPPED
GUY SITTING NEXT TO ME,
719
00:34:13,552 --> 00:34:15,187
AND HE PUT HIS HAND ON MY LAP
DURING THE MOVIE,
720
00:34:15,221 --> 00:34:16,722
AND IT REALLY
FREAKED ME OUT.
721
00:34:16,755 --> 00:34:18,490
[LAUGHS]
722
00:34:18,524 --> 00:34:19,858
THAT'S HORRIBLE.
723
00:34:19,891 --> 00:34:22,328
DON'T MAKE FUN OF ME.
THIS IS SERIOUS.
724
00:34:22,361 --> 00:34:23,729
YOU'RE RIGHT, IT'S VERY SERIOUS,
AND I CANNOT BELIEVE
725
00:34:23,762 --> 00:34:25,597
THAT LIFETIME HAS NOT MADE
THE MOVIE VERSION
726
00:34:25,631 --> 00:34:27,866
OF THE TIME SOME DUDE
FELT YOU UP AT THE MOVIES.
727
00:34:27,899 --> 00:34:29,435
YOU'RE SUCH A JERK.
728
00:34:29,468 --> 00:34:31,137
YOU LOVE IT.
729
00:34:31,170 --> 00:34:32,638
SHIRIN.
YEAH?
730
00:34:32,671 --> 00:34:35,407
WE'RE THE SAME KIND
OF STONED PERSON.
731
00:34:35,441 --> 00:34:38,110
THAT IS SO BEAUTIFUL.
NO HOMO.
732
00:34:38,144 --> 00:34:39,511
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"NO HOMO"?
733
00:34:39,545 --> 00:34:41,113
OH, YOU DON'T KNOW
WHAT "NO HOMO" IS?
734
00:34:41,147 --> 00:34:43,415
OKAY, SO "NO HOMO"
IS THIS THING
735
00:34:43,449 --> 00:34:44,716
THAT RAPPERS SAY
TO EACH OTHER
736
00:34:44,750 --> 00:34:46,752
TO, LIKE, NULLIFY
THE GAYNESS OF THEIR WORDS.
737
00:34:46,785 --> 00:34:48,420
THEY COULD BE LIKE,
738
00:34:48,454 --> 00:34:50,722
"THOSE ARE SOME REALLY FLY
JEANS, MAN. NO HOMO."
739
00:34:50,756 --> 00:34:52,824
OR "YOUR SONG TOUCHED ME.
NO HOMO."
740
00:34:52,858 --> 00:34:54,593
LIKE "I LIKE THE WAY
YOUR DICK TASTES IN MY MOUTH.
741
00:34:54,626 --> 00:34:55,727
NO HOMO."
742
00:34:55,761 --> 00:34:57,163
[CHUCKLES]
743
00:34:57,196 --> 00:34:58,830
EXACTLY.
744
00:35:08,874 --> 00:35:10,809
I FEEL REALLY LUCKY
TO HAVE MET YOU.
745
00:35:12,344 --> 00:35:14,146
NO HOMO?
HOMO.
746
00:35:14,180 --> 00:35:15,581
[CHUCKLES]
747
00:35:21,353 --> 00:35:22,788
I LOVE HOW NONE
OF YOUR WHITE SHIRTS
748
00:35:22,821 --> 00:35:24,656
GET THOSE REALLY
ANNOYING PIT STAINS
749
00:35:24,690 --> 00:35:26,658
THAT MINE ALWAYS DO.
750
00:35:26,692 --> 00:35:28,660
I LOVE THAT YOU
NOTICED THAT.
751
00:35:41,207 --> 00:35:42,341
I HAVE SOMETHING
ON MY MIND,
752
00:35:42,374 --> 00:35:43,909
BUT IT FEELS TOO SCARY
TO SAY OUT LOUD.
753
00:35:43,942 --> 00:35:45,444
SAY IT.
754
00:35:45,477 --> 00:35:46,812
DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING
ON YOUR MIND?
755
00:35:46,845 --> 00:35:49,348
MAYBE.
WHAT?
756
00:35:49,381 --> 00:35:50,716
DON'T BE A PUSSY.
757
00:35:52,318 --> 00:35:53,585
OKAY, LET'S SAY IT
AT THE SAME TIME
758
00:35:53,619 --> 00:35:55,254
ON THE COUNT
OF THREE.
759
00:35:56,722 --> 00:35:57,956
ONE...
760
00:35:57,989 --> 00:35:59,491
TWO...
TWO...
761
00:35:59,525 --> 00:36:00,792
I'M FALLING IN LOVE
WITH YOU.
762
00:36:00,826 --> 00:36:02,894
I'M THINKING OF
TRANSITIONING INTO A MAN.
763
00:36:05,531 --> 00:36:07,433
[LAUGHING]
764
00:36:09,868 --> 00:36:11,903
OF COURSE I'M FALLING
IN LOVE WITH YOU.
765
00:36:26,752 --> 00:36:28,654
[DISTANT CHATTER]
766
00:36:36,328 --> 00:36:37,763
[CHATTER]
767
00:36:39,931 --> 00:36:42,434
HI, EVERYONE.
I'D LIKE TO WELCOME YOU ALL
768
00:36:42,468 --> 00:36:43,769
TO "WITH JUSTICE FOR SOME,"
769
00:36:43,802 --> 00:36:45,637
WHERE WE LOOK AT
THE CRIMINAL JUSTICE SYSTEM
770
00:36:45,671 --> 00:36:48,407
AND ITS BIAS AGAINST
THE QUEER COMMUNITY.
771
00:36:48,440 --> 00:36:50,609
NOW IF ANY OF YOU ARE HERE
FOR THE DYKE KNITTING CIRCLE,
772
00:36:50,642 --> 00:36:53,245
IT'S BEEN MOVED TO BABELAND
ON RIVINGTON.
773
00:36:56,815 --> 00:36:59,951
UM, WE HAVE SOME COPIES
OF THE CASE STUDY
774
00:36:59,985 --> 00:37:01,653
TO GO AROUND,
SO PLEASE TAKE ONE
775
00:37:01,687 --> 00:37:03,455
IF YOU DON'T HAVE
IT ALREADY.
776
00:37:06,992 --> 00:37:08,294
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
777
00:37:08,327 --> 00:37:09,895
OH, HEY.
778
00:37:09,928 --> 00:37:11,763
YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE
WHO CARES ABOUT GAY RIGHTS.
779
00:37:11,797 --> 00:37:13,632
THIS IS MY EVENT.
I MARKED IT ON THE CALENDAR.
780
00:37:13,665 --> 00:37:14,800
HEY, GUYS,
LET'S HOLD THE SIDE TALK
781
00:37:14,833 --> 00:37:16,001
UNTIL AFTER THE DISCUSSION.
782
00:37:16,034 --> 00:37:17,836
[WHISPERING]
SORRY.
783
00:37:17,869 --> 00:37:19,805
[SASHA]
WHY DON'T WE START BY
INTRODUCING OURSELVES, HMM?
784
00:37:19,838 --> 00:37:23,775
I AM SASHA, AND I AM
A LAW PROFESSOR AT NYU.
785
00:37:23,809 --> 00:37:25,977
HI, I'M MORGAN.
I'M AN INTERN AT QUEER AID.
786
00:37:26,011 --> 00:37:27,579
[WHISPERING]
MAXINE.
787
00:37:27,613 --> 00:37:28,580
WHAT?
788
00:37:28,614 --> 00:37:29,648
IS THAT SHIRT NEW?
789
00:37:29,681 --> 00:37:32,050
[SIGHING]
YES.
790
00:37:32,083 --> 00:37:33,985
IT LOOKS REALLY
GOOD ON YOU.
791
00:37:34,019 --> 00:37:36,455
I'M JOSEPH HENDERSON,
AND I'M EXTREMELY
792
00:37:36,488 --> 00:37:38,824
DISAPPOINTED WITH THE READING
MATERIAL YOU'VE PROVIDED.
793
00:37:38,857 --> 00:37:41,059
[JOSEPH]
ABSOLUTELY NO REFERENCE
TO CRIME AGAINST NATURE LAWS.
794
00:37:41,092 --> 00:37:42,594
[WHISPERING]
IT'S WEIRD SEEING YOU IN
SOMETHING I DON'T REMEMBER.
795
00:37:42,628 --> 00:37:44,463
[SIGHING]
796
00:37:44,496 --> 00:37:45,897
[SASHA]
TRUE, UM, THIS READING
DOESN'T REFER TO--
797
00:37:45,931 --> 00:37:48,334
I WAS ARRESTED AT 18
FOR HAVING CONSENSUAL SEX
798
00:37:48,367 --> 00:37:49,635
WITH MY 16-YEAR-OLD BOYFRIEND.
799
00:37:49,668 --> 00:37:51,403
I SPENT FOUR YEARS
IN JAIL,
800
00:37:51,437 --> 00:37:52,738
AND AFTERWARDS FORCED TO
REGISTER IS A SEX OFFENDER.
801
00:37:52,771 --> 00:37:53,805
[WHISPERING]
WHAT ARE YOU DOING LATER?
802
00:37:53,839 --> 00:37:55,341
[WHISPERING]
GOING HOME.
803
00:37:55,374 --> 00:37:57,409
REMEMBER WHEN THAT
WAS MY HOME, TOO?
804
00:37:57,443 --> 00:37:58,510
PLEASE DON'T DO THIS.
805
00:37:58,544 --> 00:37:59,811
[JOSEPH]
I'M A SEX OFFENDER.
806
00:37:59,845 --> 00:38:03,349
EVERY TOWN I MOVE TO,
EVERY JOB I APPLY FOR--
807
00:38:03,382 --> 00:38:04,883
MY LIFE IS RUINED.
808
00:38:04,916 --> 00:38:06,885
HAVE A DRINK
WITH ME LATER?
809
00:38:06,918 --> 00:38:07,919
NO.
810
00:38:07,953 --> 00:38:09,655
I JUST WANT TO TALK.
NO!
811
00:38:09,688 --> 00:38:11,056
[KRISTA]
...AND I THOUGHT
WE WERE GOING TO BE
812
00:38:11,089 --> 00:38:14,560
TALKING ABOUT MARGINALIZED
WOMEN HERE TODAY.
813
00:38:18,364 --> 00:38:19,431
YES.
814
00:38:19,465 --> 00:38:20,666
MY NAME IS SHIRIN.
815
00:38:20,699 --> 00:38:26,338
I AM AN IRANIAN
BISEXUAL TEACHER,
816
00:38:26,372 --> 00:38:28,607
AND I WOULD LIKE TO TAKE
YOU OUT FOR A DRINK.
817
00:38:30,141 --> 00:38:31,377
N-- NOW?
818
00:38:31,410 --> 00:38:32,578
RIGHT AFTER THIS.
819
00:38:32,611 --> 00:38:34,380
I WOULD LIKE
TO BUY YOU A DRINK.
820
00:38:36,715 --> 00:38:37,883
UM...
821
00:38:39,851 --> 00:38:41,820
EACH FRAME IS A PICTURE.
822
00:38:41,853 --> 00:38:43,655
THAT'S WHAT YOU
CALL IT, A FRAME.
823
00:38:43,689 --> 00:38:47,493
AND, UH, WHEN YOU WANT
TO HAVE THE CANDY MOVE,
824
00:38:47,526 --> 00:38:49,995
YOU'RE GONNA TAKE A PICTURE
OF IT WHERE IT IS,
825
00:38:50,028 --> 00:38:51,863
MOVE IT VERY,
VERY SLIGHTLY,
826
00:38:51,897 --> 00:38:53,832
AND THEN TO
THE NEXT PLACE,
827
00:38:53,865 --> 00:38:55,967
AND THEN YOU TAKE A PICTURE
AND YOU HAVE IT THERE,
828
00:38:56,001 --> 00:38:57,135
AND THEN MOVE IT
A LITTLE BIT--
829
00:38:57,168 --> 00:38:58,904
HE TOOK IT!
DO NOT EAT THOSE.
830
00:38:58,937 --> 00:39:00,706
THOSE ARE FOR
THE STOP-MOTION ANIMATION.
831
00:39:00,739 --> 00:39:02,140
JUST ONE.
832
00:39:02,173 --> 00:39:04,376
YOU JUST SHOVED LIKE 40
INTO YOUR MOUTH AT ONCE.
833
00:39:04,410 --> 00:39:05,577
I GET 40, TOO.
834
00:39:05,611 --> 00:39:06,912
ME, TOO!
835
00:39:06,945 --> 00:39:08,714
I NEED TO GO TO THE BATHROOM.
ME, TOO!
836
00:39:10,449 --> 00:39:12,551
ARE YOU OLD ENOUGH TO GO
ON YOUR OWN?
837
00:39:12,584 --> 00:39:13,685
I DON'T KNOW.
838
00:39:15,521 --> 00:39:17,355
ALL RIGHT, WAIT HERE.
839
00:39:21,760 --> 00:39:23,161
ALL RIGHT, FIRST SHOT
OF THE DAY.
840
00:39:23,194 --> 00:39:25,431
WE HAVE THE FLOCKS OF BIRDS
SWARM INTO FRAME,
841
00:39:25,464 --> 00:39:26,698
EVIL-LOOKING RAVENS AND GULLS.
842
00:39:26,732 --> 00:39:28,834
HOW'S THAT LOOKING,
ART DEPARTMENT?
843
00:39:28,867 --> 00:39:30,035
EXCELLENT.
AND SOUND?
844
00:39:30,068 --> 00:39:31,437
IS EVERYTHING SET?
845
00:39:31,470 --> 00:39:32,504
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
846
00:39:32,538 --> 00:39:34,105
HI.
SORRY TO INTERRUPT.
847
00:39:34,139 --> 00:39:35,707
NOT A PROBLEM.
848
00:39:35,741 --> 00:39:37,108
WE WERE JUST PREPPING
FOR TODAY'S SHOOT.
849
00:39:37,142 --> 00:39:38,877
GRACIE, WOULD YOU MIND, UH,
850
00:39:38,910 --> 00:39:41,413
BRIEFING OUR GUEST
ON TODAY'S PROJECT?
851
00:39:41,447 --> 00:39:43,181
WE'RE DOING
A SHOT-FOR-SHOT REMAKE
852
00:39:43,214 --> 00:39:46,017
OF A SCENE FROM
"THE BIRDS."
853
00:39:48,086 --> 00:39:51,923
I'M SHIRIN.
I TEACH ACROSS THE HALL.
854
00:39:51,957 --> 00:39:54,793
HI, I'M TIBET.
THIS IS THE ADVANCED CLASS.
855
00:39:54,826 --> 00:39:56,528
I HAVE A REAL QUICK
QUESTION FOR YOU.
856
00:39:56,562 --> 00:39:57,763
YES?
857
00:39:57,796 --> 00:39:59,731
SO, YEAH, MY KIDS
ARE REAL YOUNG,
858
00:39:59,765 --> 00:40:01,867
LIKE FIVE YEARS OLD,
AND ONE OF THEM NEEDS
859
00:40:01,900 --> 00:40:03,435
TO USE THE BATHROOM.
860
00:40:03,469 --> 00:40:05,203
YES?
861
00:40:05,236 --> 00:40:08,073
WELL, DO I HAVE TO GO IN
WITH HIM, OR IS THAT PERVY?
862
00:40:08,106 --> 00:40:09,508
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
863
00:40:09,541 --> 00:40:11,042
YES.
864
00:40:11,076 --> 00:40:13,078
JUST STAND BEHIND THE DOOR
AND ASK IF HE NEEDS HELP.
865
00:40:13,111 --> 00:40:14,613
OH.
866
00:40:14,646 --> 00:40:16,582
OKAY, THANKS.
[SIGHING]
867
00:40:16,615 --> 00:40:19,618
NOT A PROBLEM,
MY FRIEND.
868
00:40:19,651 --> 00:40:22,187
HAVE WE MET BEFORE?
869
00:40:22,220 --> 00:40:24,656
I DON'T THINK SO.
I USED TO BE A HAIR MODEL,
870
00:40:24,690 --> 00:40:28,026
SO YOU MIGHT RECOGNIZE ME
FROM THAT.
871
00:40:28,059 --> 00:40:29,160
YEAH, THAT'S PROBABLY IT.
872
00:40:29,194 --> 00:40:31,029
[CHUCKLING SOFTLY]
THANK YOU.
873
00:40:32,564 --> 00:40:34,900
ALL RIGHT, SECOND SHOT
OF THE DAY.
874
00:40:34,933 --> 00:40:36,802
WE HAVE, "SHE IS TRAPPED
IN THE PHONE BOOTH
875
00:40:36,835 --> 00:40:38,637
AND THE BIRDS ARE
FLYING IN TO ATTACK HER."
876
00:40:38,670 --> 00:40:40,606
HAIR AND MAKEUP FOR THAT,
HOW ARE YOU DOING?
877
00:40:40,639 --> 00:40:43,475
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING
ALL THE WAY OUT TO BROOKLYN.
878
00:40:43,509 --> 00:40:45,777
IT IS SO NICE THAT YOU FINALLY
GOT TO SEE THE PLACE.
879
00:40:45,811 --> 00:40:47,746
WELL, THE RUG LOOKS
QUITE NICE IN HERE.
880
00:40:47,779 --> 00:40:48,747
THANK YOU.
881
00:40:48,780 --> 00:40:50,516
WHY IS THERE ONLY ONE BED?
882
00:40:50,549 --> 00:40:53,685
IT'S EUROPEAN
AND THRIFTY.
883
00:40:53,719 --> 00:40:55,053
THERE'S A LOT
OF BENEFITS.
884
00:40:55,086 --> 00:40:57,188
AND HOW--
HOW'S THAT EUROPEAN?
885
00:40:57,222 --> 00:40:58,957
I HAVE AN ITALIAN FRIEND
NAMED CECILIA,
886
00:40:58,990 --> 00:41:01,226
AND SHE HER
BEST FRIEND, UH,
887
00:41:01,259 --> 00:41:03,161
SHARED ONE BED
FOR YEARS,
888
00:41:03,194 --> 00:41:04,730
AND THEY SAVED
SO MUCH MONEY ON RENT
889
00:41:04,763 --> 00:41:06,064
THAT THEY WERE
ABLE TO AFFORD
890
00:41:06,097 --> 00:41:07,666
VERY BIG WEDDINGS
TO THEIR BOYFRIENDS.
891
00:41:09,968 --> 00:41:11,202
DO YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND,
MAXINE?
892
00:41:13,038 --> 00:41:15,040
[SIGHING]
NO, I DON'T.
893
00:41:15,073 --> 00:41:16,942
ALSO, IN
THE MOVIE "BEACHES,"
894
00:41:16,975 --> 00:41:19,645
THESE TWO BEST FRIENDS
SHARED A BED,
895
00:41:19,678 --> 00:41:22,013
AND IT WAS VERY
INEXPENSIVE.
896
00:41:25,984 --> 00:41:27,919
SO, THANK YOU
SO MUCH FOR COMING.
897
00:41:27,953 --> 00:41:29,655
NICE TO SEE YOU
BOTH AGAIN.
898
00:41:29,688 --> 00:41:30,822
WELL, BYE, GIRLS.
899
00:41:30,856 --> 00:41:31,890
BYE.
900
00:41:31,923 --> 00:41:33,258
LET ME WALK YOU OUT.
901
00:41:40,632 --> 00:41:43,034
[SIGHING]
OH, MY GOD.
902
00:41:43,068 --> 00:41:46,037
YOU...
YOU'RE AN ANGEL.
903
00:41:46,071 --> 00:41:47,939
YOU HAVE TO TELL THEM
ABOUT US.
904
00:41:47,973 --> 00:41:49,675
I KNOW.
905
00:41:49,708 --> 00:41:50,976
[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
906
00:41:51,009 --> 00:41:52,678
YES?
907
00:41:52,711 --> 00:41:55,046
HI.
HEY.
908
00:41:55,080 --> 00:41:56,782
CRYSTAL, DID YOU
SEE MY PARENTS?
909
00:41:56,815 --> 00:41:59,217
OH, YEAH, WE JUST
PASSED IN THE HALL.
910
00:41:59,250 --> 00:42:00,686
HEY, MAXINE.
911
00:42:00,719 --> 00:42:03,822
HI.
912
00:42:03,855 --> 00:42:05,657
MMM, DON'T MIND HER.
913
00:42:05,691 --> 00:42:07,793
SHE'S UPSET 'CAUSE
I'M NOT OUT TO MY PARENTS.
914
00:42:07,826 --> 00:42:11,029
OH, WELL, YOU GUYS LIVE
IN A ONE-BEDROOM APARTMENT.
915
00:42:11,062 --> 00:42:12,798
I'M PRETTY SURE THEY KNOW.
916
00:42:12,831 --> 00:42:16,101
DON'T ASK, DON'T TELL.
917
00:42:16,134 --> 00:42:17,836
YOU KNOW WHAT?
918
00:42:17,869 --> 00:42:20,972
IT'S A PROCESS,
AND I'M WORKING ON IT.
919
00:42:23,008 --> 00:42:25,043
OKAY, WE SHOULD
PROBABLY LEAVE.
920
00:42:27,045 --> 00:42:27,946
THINK I'M GONNA BOW OUT.
921
00:42:30,215 --> 00:42:32,083
MAXINE, YOU PROMISED
YOU'D GO.
922
00:42:32,117 --> 00:42:33,685
CRYSTAL'S A FRIEND
WHO'S GONNA DRESS UP
923
00:42:33,719 --> 00:42:35,854
LIKE A FARM ANIMAL
AND TOUCH HERSELF, COME.
924
00:42:35,887 --> 00:42:38,056
I CAN'T HANDLE
AN ART SHOW RIGHT NOW.
925
00:42:40,792 --> 00:42:42,560
OKAY.
926
00:42:43,962 --> 00:42:45,731
I LOVE YOU.
927
00:42:45,764 --> 00:42:46,732
BYE.
928
00:42:46,765 --> 00:42:48,867
BYE.
929
00:42:48,900 --> 00:42:51,937
BYE, MAXINE.
BYE.
930
00:42:55,273 --> 00:42:56,775
[SIGHS]
931
00:43:03,749 --> 00:43:06,918
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR
ACCEPTING MY INVITATION.
932
00:43:06,952 --> 00:43:10,288
WELL, I COULDN'T HAVE REFUSED
EVEN IF I WANTED TO.
933
00:43:10,321 --> 00:43:11,957
ALL THOSE PEOPLE.
934
00:43:11,990 --> 00:43:13,692
YOU'RE RIGHT.
935
00:43:13,725 --> 00:43:16,662
I WILL INVITE THEM ALL
TO OUR WEDDING.
936
00:43:21,332 --> 00:43:22,868
UM, WHAT ARE YOU DRINKING?
937
00:43:22,901 --> 00:43:24,069
IT'S KIND OF LIKE
AN OLD FASHIONED.
938
00:43:24,102 --> 00:43:25,804
WANT TO TRY IT?
939
00:43:25,837 --> 00:43:26,972
YEAH.
940
00:43:27,005 --> 00:43:28,907
YOU KNOW, I CAN UM,
TIE A CHERRY STEM
941
00:43:28,940 --> 00:43:30,709
INTO A KNOT
WITH MY TONGUE.
942
00:43:30,742 --> 00:43:32,177
REAL--
943
00:43:37,248 --> 00:43:40,185
UM...
944
00:43:42,688 --> 00:43:44,222
YEAH,
THAT'S A GOOD LOOK.
945
00:43:44,255 --> 00:43:46,658
THANK YOU.
I FEEL VERY SEXY.
946
00:43:46,692 --> 00:43:49,828
I'M SURPRISED BY HOW
QUICKLY THEY SPRUNG INTO ACTION.
947
00:43:49,861 --> 00:43:51,129
IT'S ALMOST AS IF
THEY EXPECTED ME
948
00:43:51,162 --> 00:43:52,931
TO MAKE A HUGE MESS.
949
00:43:52,964 --> 00:43:55,333
OH, IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU HAVE
A CONSPIRACY ON YOUR HANDS.
950
00:43:55,366 --> 00:43:56,802
YES, I DO.
951
00:43:56,835 --> 00:43:59,938
THIS IS NOT A CASE OF ME
BEING A CLUMSY OAF.
952
00:43:59,971 --> 00:44:02,140
I AM A VICTIM
OF A LARGER FORCE.
953
00:44:02,173 --> 00:44:03,842
THE BAR AND ALCOHOL
INDUSTRY.
954
00:44:03,875 --> 00:44:05,276
YES.
OUT TO GET YOU.
955
00:44:05,310 --> 00:44:08,179
YES, 'CAUSE THEY NEED A GIRL
LIKE ME TO, YOU KNOW,
956
00:44:08,213 --> 00:44:10,448
HUMILIATE HERSELF, SO THAT
THE OTHER PATRONS
957
00:44:10,481 --> 00:44:12,383
CAN FEEL
MORE CONFIDENT.
958
00:44:12,417 --> 00:44:13,719
YEAH, 'CAUSE THEY GET
TO GO HOME
959
00:44:13,752 --> 00:44:16,187
WITH A DRINK AND A SHOW.
YEAH.
960
00:44:16,221 --> 00:44:17,989
OKAY.
961
00:44:19,891 --> 00:44:21,793
ARE YOU HORRIFIED?
962
00:44:21,827 --> 00:44:23,695
IS THIS LIKE THE MOST
EMBARRASSING THING
963
00:44:23,729 --> 00:44:24,930
YOU'VE EVER WITNESSED?
964
00:44:24,963 --> 00:44:28,033
I DON'T EMBARRASS EASILY.
965
00:44:28,066 --> 00:44:31,402
I LIKE THAT.
966
00:44:36,775 --> 00:44:37,843
IT'S GETTING LATE.
967
00:44:37,876 --> 00:44:40,378
YEAH.
968
00:44:40,411 --> 00:44:41,813
DO YOU WANT TO SEE MY PLACE?
969
00:44:41,847 --> 00:44:44,082
I LIVE WITH THIS WOMAN
WHO MAY OR MAY NOT
970
00:44:44,115 --> 00:44:46,051
BE PRACTICING WITCHCRAFT.
971
00:44:46,084 --> 00:44:49,420
I'D LOVE TO INTRODUCE YOU.
972
00:44:52,290 --> 00:44:53,925
CAN I TAKE A RAIN CHECK?
973
00:44:53,959 --> 00:44:56,895
YEAH, SURE, OF COURSE.
974
00:44:56,928 --> 00:44:59,397
UM... GET THE CHECK, PLEASE?
975
00:45:01,032 --> 00:45:07,005
THIS IS ON ME, LITERALLY
AND METAPHORICALLY.
976
00:45:07,038 --> 00:45:08,173
NO, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
977
00:45:08,206 --> 00:45:09,941
NO, I SAID I GOT IT.
978
00:45:09,975 --> 00:45:11,009
I GOT--
I GOT THIS ONE.
979
00:45:11,042 --> 00:45:12,043
THANK YOU.
980
00:45:12,077 --> 00:45:14,045
NO, I'VE--
LOOK, I GOT IT.
981
00:45:14,079 --> 00:45:17,015
I SAID I GOT IT.
I'M NOT TAKING THIS BACK.
982
00:45:17,048 --> 00:45:20,051
I INVITED YOU OUT.
983
00:45:23,488 --> 00:45:24,790
OKAY.
984
00:45:26,157 --> 00:45:28,026
WHAT TRAIN YOU TAKING HOME?
985
00:45:28,059 --> 00:45:30,762
ACTUALLY, I'M GONNA STAY
AND USE THE BATHROOM.
986
00:45:30,796 --> 00:45:32,197
YOU SHOULD JUST GO.
NO, I'LL WAIT.
987
00:45:32,230 --> 00:45:34,365
NO, IT'S OKAY.
JUST GO.
988
00:45:34,399 --> 00:45:37,769
YOU ARE STUBBORN.
989
00:45:37,803 --> 00:45:39,470
YEAH.
990
00:45:43,441 --> 00:45:45,210
THANKS FOR COMING OUT
WITH ME.
991
00:45:45,243 --> 00:45:48,079
WELL, THANK YOU
FOR ASKING ME.
992
00:45:50,916 --> 00:45:52,383
OKAY, BYE.
993
00:45:52,417 --> 00:45:54,820
BYE.
994
00:46:10,068 --> 00:46:11,436
HI.
995
00:46:11,469 --> 00:46:15,874
UM, CAN I HAVE THE CHEAPEST RED
YOU'VE GOT?
996
00:46:28,987 --> 00:46:30,856
THANK YOU.
997
00:46:56,647 --> 00:46:58,583
CAN I ASK WHAT
YOU'RE HAVING?
998
00:46:58,616 --> 00:47:02,287
THE CHEAPEST RED THEY HAD.
999
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:04,155
HOW IS IT?
1000
00:47:04,189 --> 00:47:06,557
ALCOHOLIC.
1001
00:47:06,591 --> 00:47:09,094
WITH AN OAKY FINISH.
1002
00:47:09,127 --> 00:47:11,562
SOUNDS GOOD.
1003
00:47:11,596 --> 00:47:14,099
SORRY, I'M NOT WELL-VERSED
IN WINE TALK.
1004
00:47:14,132 --> 00:47:16,067
"OAKY FINISH" WAS
A NICE TOUCH.
1005
00:47:16,101 --> 00:47:19,470
THANKS.
1006
00:47:19,504 --> 00:47:21,372
I'M TED.
SHIRIN.
1007
00:47:21,406 --> 00:47:23,909
SHIRIN. HI.
HI.
1008
00:47:23,942 --> 00:47:25,510
UM, DO YOU LIVE AROUND HERE?
1009
00:47:25,543 --> 00:47:27,412
HI.
1010
00:47:27,445 --> 00:47:28,880
OH, HEY,
WHO'S YOUR FRIEND?
1011
00:47:28,914 --> 00:47:30,348
THIS IS SHIRIN.
1012
00:47:30,381 --> 00:47:32,050
SHIRIN, I'M MARIE.
1013
00:47:32,083 --> 00:47:34,652
HI.
1014
00:47:34,685 --> 00:47:37,588
YEAH, WE UH, LIVE A FEW BLOCKS
FROM HERE, ACTUALLY.
1015
00:47:37,622 --> 00:47:39,524
MM-HM.
COOL.
1016
00:47:39,557 --> 00:47:42,894
HEY, DO YOU WANT TO COME
SIT WITH US?
1017
00:47:42,928 --> 00:47:45,931
OKAY.
[CHUCKLES]
1018
00:47:45,964 --> 00:47:48,399
I'M LIKE ONE BAD ROMANTIC
ENCOUNTER AWAY
1019
00:47:48,433 --> 00:47:50,635
FROM MOVING TO FRANCE
AND CHANGING MY IDENTITY.
1020
00:47:50,668 --> 00:47:52,203
HMM.
1021
00:47:52,237 --> 00:47:53,404
DO YOU WANT AN OLIVE?
1022
00:47:53,438 --> 00:47:54,906
NO, I'M OKAY.
1023
00:47:54,940 --> 00:47:56,407
BUT MAYBE I SHOULD GO TO,
LIKE,
1024
00:47:56,441 --> 00:47:59,077
A LESS GLAMOROUS PLACE, LIKE
SLOVENIA OR SOMETHING,
1025
00:47:59,110 --> 00:48:01,146
WHERE MY CHANCES OF POPULARITY
WOULD BE GREATER.
1026
00:48:01,179 --> 00:48:04,149
HMM.
THEY'RE REALLY GOOD.
1027
00:48:04,182 --> 00:48:05,616
I'M OKAY.
[GIGGLES]
1028
00:48:05,650 --> 00:48:08,119
WOULD YOU LIKE SOME WINE?
YEAH.
1029
00:48:08,153 --> 00:48:11,189
WHY ARE YOU GIGGLING?
1030
00:48:11,222 --> 00:48:13,558
I'M JUST--
I'VE BEEN PLOTTING ON HOW
1031
00:48:13,591 --> 00:48:15,360
TO GET YOU EAT
ONE OF THESE OLIVES,
1032
00:48:15,393 --> 00:48:18,096
BECAUSE THEY'RE
COVERED IN GARLIC,
1033
00:48:18,129 --> 00:48:21,366
AND WE'VE ALREADY HAD SOME.
1034
00:48:21,399 --> 00:48:24,269
OH.
1035
00:48:24,302 --> 00:48:27,973
I GUESS IT'S SORT OF AN ALL
OR NOTHING KIND OF THING.
1036
00:48:33,744 --> 00:48:35,546
PROBLEM SOLVED.
1037
00:48:37,983 --> 00:48:43,688
*
1038
00:49:07,545 --> 00:49:10,348
YOU SHOULD SHOW HER
YOUR LATEX OUTFIT.
1039
00:49:10,381 --> 00:49:12,617
YOU HAVE A LATEX OUTFIT?
1040
00:49:12,650 --> 00:49:15,620
YEAH. YEAH, I HAVE TO
OIL UP TO PUT IT ON.
1041
00:49:15,653 --> 00:49:18,089
WOW.
YEAH, PLEASE PUT THAT ON.
1042
00:49:18,123 --> 00:49:19,590
[CHUCKLES]
OH.
1043
00:49:19,624 --> 00:49:21,559
THANKS.
1044
00:49:24,429 --> 00:49:26,331
DRINK?
YEAH.
1045
00:49:28,199 --> 00:49:32,037
UM, SO IN WHAT SITUATION DOES
A PERSON FIND THEMSELVES
1046
00:49:32,070 --> 00:49:34,105
IN NEED OF LATEX OUTFIT?
1047
00:49:34,139 --> 00:49:36,107
BURLESQUE SHOWS,
PLAY PARTIES,
1048
00:49:36,141 --> 00:49:37,642
ALL KINDS OF PLACES,
REALLY.
1049
00:49:37,675 --> 00:49:39,310
AH.
1050
00:49:39,344 --> 00:49:43,348
UM, OKAY, BUT--
BUT HERE'S MY QUESTION.
1051
00:49:43,381 --> 00:49:45,283
WHY DO THE WOMEN
HAVE TO DRESS UP
1052
00:49:45,316 --> 00:49:46,584
LIKE SLUTTY CUPCAKES?
1053
00:49:46,617 --> 00:49:48,253
WHAT ABOUT THE DUDES?
1054
00:49:48,286 --> 00:49:52,123
WELL, I HAVE
A LATEX OUTFIT, TOO.
1055
00:49:52,157 --> 00:49:54,325
[LAUGHS]
1056
00:49:54,359 --> 00:49:56,694
THAT'S SOUNDS HORRIBLE.
1057
00:49:56,727 --> 00:49:58,563
[MARIE]
OH, IT'S REALLY CUTE.
1058
00:49:58,596 --> 00:50:01,766
I'LL HAVE TO TAKE
YOUR WORD ON THAT ONE.
1059
00:50:16,681 --> 00:50:18,049
THANKS.
1060
00:50:19,684 --> 00:50:21,086
CHEERS.
CHEERS.
1061
00:50:37,535 --> 00:50:39,470
[GIGGLES]
1062
00:50:47,612 --> 00:50:49,447
[MOANING]
1063
00:51:28,719 --> 00:51:30,488
[LAUGHING]
1064
00:53:14,359 --> 00:53:16,227
ARE YOU OKAY?
1065
00:53:18,963 --> 00:53:20,498
YEAH.
1066
00:53:20,531 --> 00:53:23,401
I'M SORRY, I-- I JUST GOT
A LITTLE IN MY HEAD
1067
00:53:23,434 --> 00:53:26,003
FOR A MINUTE.
1068
00:53:26,036 --> 00:53:28,473
NO, IT'S-- IT'S OKAY.
1069
00:53:28,506 --> 00:53:31,742
IT'S OKAY.
1070
00:53:31,776 --> 00:53:37,548
SO THIS IS MY FIRST TIME
DOING THIS.
1071
00:53:37,582 --> 00:53:41,919
WELL, WE CAN TAKE IT SLOW.
1072
00:53:41,952 --> 00:53:44,655
THANK YOU.
1073
00:53:53,398 --> 00:53:55,700
I LIKE YOU.
1074
00:53:55,733 --> 00:53:57,268
A LOT.
1075
00:53:57,302 --> 00:53:58,736
[CHUCKLES]
1076
00:53:58,769 --> 00:54:01,606
THANK YOU.
I LIKE YOU, TOO.
1077
00:54:03,374 --> 00:54:05,776
YOU KNOW WHAT?
WE DON'T HAVE TO FUCK.
1078
00:54:05,810 --> 00:54:08,279
YOU KNOW,
WE CAN JUST HANG OUT,
1079
00:54:08,313 --> 00:54:10,281
PLAY MONOPOLY OR SOMETHING.
1080
00:54:10,315 --> 00:54:13,518
THAT ACTUALLY SOUNDS
LIKE A LOT OF FUN.
1081
00:54:13,551 --> 00:54:15,953
GREAT.
I HAVE THE CLUE VERSION.
1082
00:54:15,986 --> 00:54:17,288
OH.
YEAH.
1083
00:54:17,322 --> 00:54:18,523
THAT'S REALLY COOL.
YEAH.
1084
00:54:18,556 --> 00:54:20,391
[LAUGHS]
IT'S AWESOME.
1085
00:54:20,425 --> 00:54:24,362
HONEY.
1086
00:54:24,395 --> 00:54:26,464
[TED]
YOU TWO CAN STAY AS YOU ARE.
1087
00:54:31,035 --> 00:54:32,603
UM, I SHOULD GET DRESSED.
1088
00:54:32,637 --> 00:54:34,439
NO, DON'T.
1089
00:54:36,541 --> 00:54:41,379
IT'S OKAY.
UM, I SH-- I SHOULD GO.
1090
00:54:41,412 --> 00:54:43,548
NO, NO.
1091
00:54:43,581 --> 00:54:44,882
TED, TED,
TELL HER TO STAY.
1092
00:55:16,847 --> 00:55:18,383
THANKS.
1093
00:55:21,051 --> 00:55:22,653
I REALLY DON'T WANT THIS
TO BE THE LAST TIME
1094
00:55:22,687 --> 00:55:24,355
THAT WE SEE EACH OTHER.
1095
00:55:26,557 --> 00:55:28,693
ME, NEITHER.
1096
00:55:51,816 --> 00:55:53,751
[SNIFFLING]
1097
00:55:53,784 --> 00:55:59,690
*
1098
00:56:24,982 --> 00:56:27,685
[LOUD DANCE MUSIC]
1099
00:56:27,718 --> 00:56:34,692
*
1100
00:56:34,725 --> 00:56:36,594
[SHIRIN]
HOW COME NO ONE SAID
YOU HAD TO COME DRESSED
1101
00:56:36,627 --> 00:56:38,929
AS ONE OF YOUR
FAVORITE CHARACTERS FROM
"THE LITTLE RASCALS"?
1102
00:56:38,963 --> 00:56:41,131
THAT'S THE GREAT THING
ABOUT PRIDE.
1103
00:56:43,801 --> 00:56:46,003
PEOPLE HERE LOOK LIKE THEY
DIDN'T GO TO COLLEGE.
1104
00:56:46,036 --> 00:56:48,506
YOUR ATTITUDE IS REALLY
PISSING ME OFF.
1105
00:56:48,539 --> 00:56:51,776
SORRY.
1106
00:56:51,809 --> 00:56:54,512
DID YOU SEE THE DRAG QUEEN?
THAT'S MY FRIEND.
1107
00:56:54,545 --> 00:56:56,447
HOW COME THE ONLY ASPECT
OF GAY CULTURE
1108
00:56:56,481 --> 00:56:57,748
THAT'S OKAY WITH YOU
IS DRAG?
1109
00:56:57,782 --> 00:57:00,851
HEY, WHAT AM I GOOD AT?
1110
00:57:00,885 --> 00:57:02,052
I DON'T KNOW, WHAT?
1111
00:57:02,086 --> 00:57:04,154
DRINKING AND DANCING,
REMEMBER?
1112
00:57:04,188 --> 00:57:05,990
LET'S HAVE FUN.
1113
00:57:06,023 --> 00:57:08,993
FINE.
KISS ME.
1114
00:57:09,026 --> 00:57:11,195
TWO VODKA RED BULLS,
PLEASE.
1115
00:57:19,537 --> 00:57:21,205
THANK YOU.
THANKS.
1116
00:57:29,847 --> 00:57:31,982
AAH.
1117
00:57:34,284 --> 00:57:35,953
CAN I GET ANOTHER ONE?
1118
00:57:35,986 --> 00:57:41,892
*
1119
00:57:48,999 --> 00:57:51,502
YOU HAVIN' FUN?
1120
00:57:51,536 --> 00:57:53,738
SURE.
1121
00:57:53,771 --> 00:57:56,974
LOOK, BEFORE YOU ASK, NO,
I'M NOT AN F TO M TRANSSEXUAL.
1122
00:57:57,007 --> 00:57:58,876
UH, SORRY TO DISAPPOINT.
1123
00:57:58,909 --> 00:58:00,678
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
1124
00:58:00,711 --> 00:58:02,880
MY SISTER AND I MADE A BET.
1125
00:58:02,913 --> 00:58:04,882
I'M GUESSING SHE WON?
1126
00:58:04,915 --> 00:58:07,251
AH... CORRECT.
1127
00:58:07,284 --> 00:58:08,953
I'M MAXINE.
1128
00:58:08,986 --> 00:58:10,721
GEORGE.
1129
00:58:10,755 --> 00:58:13,157
NICE TO MEET YOU.
1130
00:58:13,190 --> 00:58:18,929
*
1131
00:58:26,236 --> 00:58:29,840
[BALLOONS SQUEAKING]
1132
00:58:58,135 --> 00:59:00,204
I CAN SEE YOU.
1133
00:59:04,308 --> 00:59:05,910
SHIRIN, STOP.
FUCK YOU.
1134
00:59:05,943 --> 00:59:07,244
I'M SORRY.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.
1135
00:59:07,277 --> 00:59:08,746
WHAT THE FUCK?
HE'S A MAN.
1136
00:59:08,779 --> 00:59:10,280
IT WAS LIKE KISSING
A BABY.
1137
00:59:10,314 --> 00:59:11,348
WHAT?
1138
00:59:11,381 --> 00:59:14,051
IT'S JUST LIKE LIPS TOUCHING.
1139
00:59:14,084 --> 00:59:15,152
I HATE YOU SO MUCH
WHEN YOU'RE DRINKING.
1140
00:59:15,185 --> 00:59:16,721
I'M SO--
DO NOT TOUCH ME.
1141
00:59:16,754 --> 00:59:18,222
WHOA.
ARE YOU OKAY?
1142
00:59:18,255 --> 00:59:20,591
YOU SHOVED ME OFF,
LIKE, REALLY VIOLENTLY.
1143
00:59:20,625 --> 00:59:21,926
YOU CHEATED ON ME.
1144
00:59:21,959 --> 00:59:23,728
YOU HIT ME.
1145
00:59:23,761 --> 00:59:26,163
[SIGHS]
I FEEL SICK.
1146
00:59:27,732 --> 00:59:29,600
PLEASE DON'T CRY.
1147
00:59:29,634 --> 00:59:31,001
DON'T.
1148
00:59:31,035 --> 00:59:33,037
I'M SORRY.
YOU HAVE TO FORGIVE ME.
1149
00:59:33,070 --> 00:59:35,139
WHO IS HE?
1150
00:59:35,172 --> 00:59:37,007
JUST SOME GUY AT THE BAR.
WE WERE JUST DRINKING.
1151
00:59:37,041 --> 00:59:39,844
AND YOU WERE LIKE,
"WANT TO KISS A LESBIAN?"
1152
00:59:39,877 --> 00:59:41,011
IT ONLY LASTED A SECOND.
1153
00:59:41,045 --> 00:59:42,947
I WAS WATCHING YOU.
IT WAS FOREVER.
1154
00:59:42,980 --> 00:59:45,916
HEY.
I AM SORRY.
1155
00:59:45,950 --> 00:59:47,618
YOU HAVE TO FORGIVE ME.
1156
01:00:04,401 --> 01:00:07,938
WHO SPENDS $300
ON A GARTER BELT?
1157
01:00:07,972 --> 01:00:09,874
MAY I HELP YOU?
UH, WE'RE JUST LOOKING.
1158
01:00:09,907 --> 01:00:11,175
ACTUALLY, YES.
1159
01:00:11,208 --> 01:00:13,878
UM, I'M LOOKING FOR
THE GROWN-UP UNDERWEAR
1160
01:00:13,911 --> 01:00:16,146
OF A WOMAN IN CHARGE
OF HER SEXUALITY
1161
01:00:16,180 --> 01:00:17,414
AND NOT AFRAID OF CHANGE.
1162
01:00:17,447 --> 01:00:19,650
I'VE GOT THAT.
1163
01:00:21,451 --> 01:00:25,255
THIS JUST CAME IN
FROM FRANCE.
1164
01:00:25,289 --> 01:00:27,024
IT'S A BIT PINK.
1165
01:00:27,057 --> 01:00:28,392
WELL, WHY DON'T YOU
TRY IT ON FOR YOURSELF?
1166
01:00:28,425 --> 01:00:29,760
LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU NEED,
1167
01:00:29,794 --> 01:00:31,095
AND I'LL GET A ROOM READY
FOR YOU.
1168
01:00:31,128 --> 01:00:32,797
I ACTUALLY NEED TO STOCK UP
ON PANTIES.
1169
01:00:32,830 --> 01:00:35,733
MY EX-GIRLFRIEND
UH, CUT UP MOST OF MINE,
1170
01:00:35,766 --> 01:00:37,434
SO I'M GONNA NEED MORE.
1171
01:00:37,467 --> 01:00:40,104
WHAT ABOUT BRAS?
I DON'T WEAR THOSE.
1172
01:00:40,137 --> 01:00:41,706
WHY NOT?
1173
01:00:41,739 --> 01:00:42,873
JUST DON'T HAVE THAT MUCH
TO WORK WITH,
1174
01:00:42,907 --> 01:00:44,408
SO IT FEELS
A LITTLE SILLY.
1175
01:00:44,441 --> 01:00:46,877
YOU KNOW, LIKE WHEN
LITTLE GIRLS CARRY PURSES.
1176
01:00:46,911 --> 01:00:48,412
WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
1177
01:00:48,445 --> 01:00:49,446
SHIRIN.
1178
01:00:49,479 --> 01:00:51,115
SHIRIN.
1179
01:00:51,148 --> 01:00:52,750
YOU ARE A WOMAN,
AND YOU HAVE BREASTS,
1180
01:00:52,783 --> 01:00:54,251
AND THERE'S NOTHING WRONG
WITH THEM.
1181
01:00:54,284 --> 01:00:56,954
YEAH, I KNOW.
[CHUCKLES]
1182
01:00:56,987 --> 01:00:58,422
YOU DESERVE A SEXY,
SUPPORTIVE BRA,
1183
01:00:58,455 --> 01:00:59,857
JUST LIKE ANY OTHER
WOMAN.
1184
01:00:59,890 --> 01:01:01,992
OKAY.
1185
01:01:02,026 --> 01:01:03,694
YOU WERE WITH A WOMAN
FOR HOW LONG,
1186
01:01:03,728 --> 01:01:05,295
AND SHE DIDN'T HELP YOU
FIND THE RIGHT BRA?
1187
01:01:05,329 --> 01:01:07,331
A WHILE.
1188
01:01:07,364 --> 01:01:09,299
WELL, IT SOUNDS LIKE YOUR EX--
WHAT'S HER NAME?
1189
01:01:09,333 --> 01:01:11,035
MAXINE.
1190
01:01:11,068 --> 01:01:13,337
SOUNDS LIKE MAXINE WAS
DESTRUCTIVE TO YOUR PANTIES
1191
01:01:13,370 --> 01:01:15,339
AND YOUR SELF-ESTEEM.
I'M SO SORRY.
1192
01:01:15,372 --> 01:01:16,941
IS THIS REALLY NECESSARY?
1193
01:01:16,974 --> 01:01:19,176
I'M FINE.
I JU-- I JUST NEED UNDERWEAR.
1194
01:01:19,209 --> 01:01:20,811
JUST BECAUSE YOUR BREASTS
ARE SMALL
1195
01:01:20,845 --> 01:01:22,346
DOESN'T MEAN
THEY'RE NOT LEGITIMATE.
1196
01:01:22,379 --> 01:01:25,282
I KNOW.
1197
01:01:25,315 --> 01:01:27,718
IT'S OKAY TO BE ANGRY.
OH, MY GOD.
1198
01:01:27,752 --> 01:01:30,087
LET'S TRY THAT ON.
1199
01:01:30,120 --> 01:01:32,857
YOU KNOW, IT'S LIKE I DIDN'T
THINK I DESERVED A BRA,
1200
01:01:32,890 --> 01:01:35,425
BECAUSE I DON'T SEE MYSELF
AS A REAL WOMAN.
1201
01:01:35,459 --> 01:01:37,361
IT'S ABOUT MORE THAN
JUST FABRIC.
1202
01:01:37,394 --> 01:01:39,730
YEAH, AND I'VE BEEN WEARING
BIKINI BOTTOMS FOR MONTHS.
1203
01:01:39,764 --> 01:01:41,431
WELL, THAT'S BASICALLY
INVITING PEOPLE
1204
01:01:41,465 --> 01:01:43,367
WHO DON'T RESPECT YOU
INTO YOUR BEDROOM.
1205
01:01:43,400 --> 01:01:45,369
THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I DID,
AND NOW I'M LIKE SEEING HER
1206
01:01:45,402 --> 01:01:47,004
AT A PARTY ON SATURDAY,
1207
01:01:47,037 --> 01:01:48,973
AND HOW DO I EXPECT ANYONE
TO TAKE ME SERIOUSLY
1208
01:01:49,006 --> 01:01:50,474
IF I AM NOT WEARING A BRA?
1209
01:01:50,507 --> 01:01:51,876
I TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY.
1210
01:01:51,909 --> 01:01:53,343
THAT DOESN'T COUNT.
1211
01:01:56,847 --> 01:01:58,883
[SIGHS]
1212
01:02:18,435 --> 01:02:20,737
STUNNING.
1213
01:02:35,853 --> 01:02:38,055
GOD, I HATE YOUR FRIENDS.
1214
01:02:38,088 --> 01:02:39,289
MY FRIENDS ARE MY FAMILY.
1215
01:02:39,323 --> 01:02:41,225
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT
THAT'S LIKE,
1216
01:02:41,258 --> 01:02:42,993
TO HAVE TO CHOOSE YOUR OWN
FAMILY BECAUSE THE ONE
YOU WERE BORN INTO--
1217
01:02:43,027 --> 01:02:45,896
OH, COME ON, ENOUGH OF THIS
LESBIAN ORPHAN PROPAGANDA.
1218
01:02:45,930 --> 01:02:47,497
YOU KNOW, WE'RE ALL BORN
INTO SHIT FAMILIES.
1219
01:02:47,531 --> 01:02:49,566
WE DEAL WITH IT.
WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?
1220
01:02:49,599 --> 01:02:52,469
MY PROBLEM IS I HAVEN'T BEEN
FUCKED IN LIKE THREE WEEKS.
1221
01:02:52,502 --> 01:02:54,338
I AM NOT GONNA TALK
ABOUT THIS ON MY BIRTHDAY.
1222
01:02:54,371 --> 01:02:55,973
ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
WHAT ARE YOU, EIGHT?
1223
01:02:56,006 --> 01:02:58,375
SO YOU HAPPENED TO BE BORN.
BIG FUCKING DEAL.
1224
01:02:58,408 --> 01:03:00,444
OH, I'M SORRY, ALL ATTENTION
MUST REVOLVE AROUND YOU
1225
01:03:00,477 --> 01:03:02,012
100% OF THE TIME.
I FORGOT.
1226
01:03:02,046 --> 01:03:03,981
NO, THAT'S NOT TRUE.
I'M NOT LIKE THAT.
1227
01:03:04,014 --> 01:03:06,817
I DON'T KNOW WHY I GET
SO SHOCKED WHEN YOU
DO SHIT LIKE THIS.
1228
01:03:06,851 --> 01:03:08,152
YOU'RE A GROWN WOMAN
IN A CREEPY,
1229
01:03:08,185 --> 01:03:09,453
CO-DEPENDENT RELATIONSHIP
WITH YOUR PARENTS.
1230
01:03:09,486 --> 01:03:11,889
IT'S TOTALLY NORMAL,
AND YOU HAVE NO IDEA
1231
01:03:11,922 --> 01:03:13,523
WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT
BECAUSE YOU COMPLETELY
ABANDONED YOUR FAMILY.
1232
01:03:13,557 --> 01:03:15,292
IT WASN'T A CHOICE!
1233
01:03:15,325 --> 01:03:16,460
OF COURSE, IT'S A CHOICE!
1234
01:03:16,493 --> 01:03:18,128
SAYS THE CLOSET CASE!
1235
01:03:18,162 --> 01:03:20,097
THEY KNOW I KNOW THEY KNOW.
1236
01:03:20,130 --> 01:03:21,565
I'M WAITING FOR THE RIGHT
TIME TO BRING IT UP,
1237
01:03:21,598 --> 01:03:23,167
OUT OF RESPECT FOR THEM.
1238
01:03:23,200 --> 01:03:25,169
I THINK YOU AND I SEE THE WORLD
TOTALLY DIFFERENTLY.
1239
01:03:25,202 --> 01:03:27,404
WE DO. YOU KNOW, YOU THINK
THAT I'M A BAD PERSON
1240
01:03:27,437 --> 01:03:28,973
BECAUSE I'M NOT COMING OUT
ON YOUR TERMS,
1241
01:03:29,006 --> 01:03:30,207
AND I DON'T AGREE WITH THAT.
1242
01:03:30,240 --> 01:03:32,009
THAT IS NOT TRUE.
I DIDN'T SAY THAT.
1243
01:03:32,042 --> 01:03:33,610
THAT'S TOTALLY TRUE.
YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO ME.
1244
01:03:33,643 --> 01:03:35,212
I'M LISTENING TO YOU, AND
EVERYTHING YOU'RE SAYING
1245
01:03:35,245 --> 01:03:36,981
IS PISSING ME OFF
AND COMPLETELY INACCURATE.
1246
01:03:37,014 --> 01:03:38,615
YOU ARE RUINING MY BIRTHDAY.
1247
01:03:38,648 --> 01:03:40,284
YOU'RE RUINING MY TWENTIES.
1248
01:03:40,317 --> 01:03:42,152
I CAN'T--
1249
01:03:42,186 --> 01:03:43,620
I DON'T HAVE THE PATIENCE
TO DEAL WITH YOU.
1250
01:03:43,653 --> 01:03:45,355
THAT'S FINE.
LET'S BREAK UP.
1251
01:03:45,389 --> 01:03:48,625
FINE.
1252
01:03:48,658 --> 01:03:50,294
OKAY.
1253
01:03:58,335 --> 01:04:01,038
IF YOU'RE GONNA GO, JUST GO.
YOU DON'T GET TO TAKE THINGS.
1254
01:04:02,472 --> 01:04:04,875
I GOT YOU THOSE PANTIES.
1255
01:04:12,582 --> 01:04:14,584
ABSOLUTELY NOT.
FUCK YOU.
1256
01:04:14,618 --> 01:04:16,253
WHAT THE FUCK IS
WRONG WITH YOU?
1257
01:04:16,286 --> 01:04:17,354
I GOT THESE FOR YOU.
1258
01:04:17,387 --> 01:04:19,089
YOU'RE A FUCKING
CRAZY PERSON!
1259
01:04:19,123 --> 01:04:20,290
YOU WANT TO PLAY
LIKE THIS?
1260
01:04:20,324 --> 01:04:22,226
DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS?
OKAY.
1261
01:04:22,259 --> 01:04:24,161
I BOUGHT ALL THE BOOZE
FOR THIS PARTY.
1262
01:04:24,194 --> 01:04:25,162
[GLASS SHATTERING]
1263
01:04:31,969 --> 01:04:33,637
ARE YOU HAPPY?
IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED?
1264
01:04:33,670 --> 01:04:36,373
YOU KNOW WHAT-- DON'T BOTHER
TELLING YOUR PARENTS ABOUT US.
1265
01:04:36,406 --> 01:04:38,675
I KNOW YOU, AND THE MORE
THAT I THINK ABOUT IT,
1266
01:04:38,708 --> 01:04:40,144
THIS IS PROBABLY JUST A PHASE.
1267
01:04:44,281 --> 01:04:47,918
GOD, THIS WAS SUCH
A WASTE.
1268
01:05:02,366 --> 01:05:04,301
[LOUD DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]
1269
01:05:04,334 --> 01:05:10,240
*
1270
01:05:20,250 --> 01:05:21,518
HEY.
1271
01:05:21,551 --> 01:05:23,320
HI.
1272
01:05:25,155 --> 01:05:27,557
NICE HAIR.
THANKS.
1273
01:05:27,591 --> 01:05:29,593
THIS IS JON FRANCIS.
1274
01:05:29,626 --> 01:05:31,962
THIS IS MAXINE.
1275
01:05:31,996 --> 01:05:34,498
JON, SHOW HER
YOUR CHEST TATTOO.
1276
01:05:34,531 --> 01:05:36,666
IT TOOK THEM FOUR HOURS
TO DO IT.
1277
01:05:36,700 --> 01:05:38,668
IT'S A GIANT SQUID
BITING A SPERM WHALE.
1278
01:05:38,702 --> 01:05:40,670
COOL.
1279
01:05:40,704 --> 01:05:42,106
HOW ARE YOU?
1280
01:05:42,139 --> 01:05:43,607
I'M OKAY.
YOU?
1281
01:05:43,640 --> 01:05:45,042
GOOD.
1282
01:05:45,075 --> 01:05:46,443
YOU SHOULD MEET MY DATE.
1283
01:05:46,476 --> 01:05:48,678
WHERE IS SHE?
1284
01:05:48,712 --> 01:05:50,247
AT THE BAR,
GETTING US DRINKS.
1285
01:05:50,280 --> 01:05:52,049
GREAT.
SHE SOUNDS AWESOME.
1286
01:05:52,082 --> 01:05:54,518
SHE IS.
1287
01:05:54,551 --> 01:05:57,087
GOD, LOOK HOW THINGS WORKED OUT
FOR BOTH OF US.
1288
01:05:57,121 --> 01:05:59,990
YOU HAVE YOUR LADY WHO
FETCHES YOU DRINKS AT A BAR,
1289
01:06:00,024 --> 01:06:03,093
LIKE A MAID, AND I HAVE
MY HUNKY REBEL WITH A CAUSE.
1290
01:06:03,127 --> 01:06:04,661
OH, WHAT'S THE CAUSE?
1291
01:06:04,694 --> 01:06:07,197
JON'S SPEARHEADING A CAMPAIGN
TO BRIDGE THE GAPS
1292
01:06:07,231 --> 01:06:10,200
OF GENTRIFICATION IN BROOKLYN
THROUGH MASS KOMBUCHA BREWING.
1293
01:06:10,234 --> 01:06:12,136
THAT'S NOT A THING.
[CHUCKLES]
1294
01:06:12,169 --> 01:06:13,770
YEAH, WE'RE GONNA
GO DANCE NOW.
1295
01:06:13,803 --> 01:06:16,240
JON'S KNOWN ALL OVER BUSHWICK
FOR HIS VOGUEING.
1296
01:06:16,273 --> 01:06:18,542
WHAT A COINCIDENCE.
T's AN AMAZING DANCER.
1297
01:06:18,575 --> 01:06:20,244
OH, IS SHE?
YEAH.
1298
01:06:20,277 --> 01:06:22,179
SHE GOES TO HER WEST AFRICAN
DANCE CLASS RELIGIOUSLY.
1299
01:06:22,212 --> 01:06:24,014
IS SHE BLACK?
1300
01:06:24,048 --> 01:06:27,351
NO.
SHE SOUNDS AWESOME.
1301
01:06:27,384 --> 01:06:28,718
SHE IS.
1302
01:06:28,752 --> 01:06:34,658
*
1303
01:06:51,408 --> 01:06:54,511
* THIS CLUB THING'S
NOT FOR ME *
1304
01:06:54,544 --> 01:06:58,482
* YOU SEE I LEFT MY LOVER
AS YOU CAN SEE *
1305
01:06:58,515 --> 01:07:01,818
* BUT THIS CLUB THING'S
NOT FOR ME *
1306
01:07:01,851 --> 01:07:05,589
* I WANNA PUT MY MUSIC
ON TV *
1307
01:07:05,622 --> 01:07:09,293
* I WANNA PUT MY MUSIC
ON THE STREETS *
1308
01:07:09,326 --> 01:07:12,462
* OR AT LEAST HAVE COMPANY
1309
01:07:12,496 --> 01:07:17,467
*
1310
01:07:17,501 --> 01:07:19,069
TIBET?
1311
01:07:19,103 --> 01:07:20,404
HEY, SHIRIN.
1312
01:07:20,437 --> 01:07:22,139
THIS IS YOUR DATE?
1313
01:07:22,172 --> 01:07:23,307
YOU TWO KNOW EACH OTHER?
1314
01:07:23,340 --> 01:07:25,742
YEAH, WE WORK
TOGETHER.
1315
01:07:25,775 --> 01:07:27,377
TIBET,
THIS IS JON FRANCIS.
1316
01:07:27,411 --> 01:07:29,713
JON, SHOW HER
YOUR CHEST TATTOO.
1317
01:07:29,746 --> 01:07:31,848
UH, TIBET'S
A FORMER HAIR MODEL.
1318
01:07:31,881 --> 01:07:33,483
YEAH, I HEARD.
[CHUCKLES]
1319
01:07:33,517 --> 01:07:36,353
MAXINE AND I USED TO DATE.
CAN YOU IMAGINE?
1320
01:07:36,386 --> 01:07:38,355
NOPE.
WHY NOT?
1321
01:07:38,388 --> 01:07:40,557
I THOUGHT YOU WERE STRAIGHT.
FUCK YOU.
1322
01:07:40,590 --> 01:07:42,426
WHOA, THAT IS UNCALLED FOR!
1323
01:07:42,459 --> 01:07:43,693
YOUR HAIR IS UNCALLED FOR.
1324
01:07:43,727 --> 01:07:45,229
[JON]
BABY, LET'S GO GET HIGH.
1325
01:07:45,262 --> 01:07:48,165
I DON'T WANT TO GET HIGH.
WHATEVER.
1326
01:07:48,198 --> 01:07:51,568
WHAT IS UP WITH YOUR PASSIVE
DISINTEREST IN EVERYTHING?
1327
01:07:51,601 --> 01:07:53,570
SERIOUSLY, WHAT HAPPENED
AT WESLEYAN
1328
01:07:53,603 --> 01:07:55,105
THAT DID THIS TO YOU?
1329
01:07:55,139 --> 01:07:56,506
MAXINE, MAYBE WE SHOULD GO.
1330
01:07:56,540 --> 01:07:58,175
OH, SHUT UP, TIBET.
1331
01:07:58,208 --> 01:07:59,543
NO ONE CARES WHAT
YOU HAVE TO SAY.
1332
01:07:59,576 --> 01:08:01,411
YOU HAVE THE SEX APPEAL
OF A FERRET.
1333
01:08:15,525 --> 01:08:17,461
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
1334
01:08:17,494 --> 01:08:18,795
I'M IN HERE.
1335
01:08:18,828 --> 01:08:20,230
IT'S MAXINE.
1336
01:08:20,264 --> 01:08:22,232
GO AWAY.
1337
01:08:32,776 --> 01:08:36,313
THE DOOR WAS UNLOCKED.
1338
01:08:36,346 --> 01:08:38,215
I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU COULD
TRY TO REPLACE ME
1339
01:08:38,248 --> 01:08:40,350
WITH THAT FETUS.
1340
01:08:40,384 --> 01:08:42,686
I'M NOT TRYING
TO REPLACE YOU.
1341
01:08:50,660 --> 01:08:52,429
I HATE JON.
1342
01:08:52,462 --> 01:08:54,164
I KNOW.
1343
01:08:55,932 --> 01:08:58,735
TAKE A CAB HOME.
1344
01:08:58,768 --> 01:09:00,704
YOU'RE GONNA BE OKAY.
1345
01:09:16,920 --> 01:09:19,623
[KIDS LAUGHING, SHOUTING]
1346
01:09:21,558 --> 01:09:22,959
ALL RIGHT, OKAY,
1347
01:09:22,992 --> 01:09:25,562
EVERYBODY PLEASE COME SIT.
I HAVE A FILM.
1348
01:09:25,595 --> 01:09:27,797
EVERYBODY STOP PLAYING
1349
01:09:27,831 --> 01:09:30,934
AND COME WATCH THE MOVIE.
1350
01:09:30,967 --> 01:09:32,802
ALRIGHT, SO THIS IS ONE
OF THE FIRST FILMS
1351
01:09:32,836 --> 01:09:33,970
THAT WAS EVER MADE
FOR AUDI--
1352
01:09:34,003 --> 01:09:37,441
IT'S NOT APPROPRIATE
FOR OUR AGE.
1353
01:09:37,474 --> 01:09:38,808
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE
LIKE THAT?
1354
01:09:38,842 --> 01:09:40,444
[GIRL]
WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?
1355
01:09:40,477 --> 01:09:43,280
KUJO, GROUCHO, WHY ARE YOU
NOT SITTING HERE?
1356
01:09:43,313 --> 01:09:44,514
I'M SCREENING A FILM.
1357
01:09:44,548 --> 01:09:46,850
[KIDS CONTINUE PLAYING]
1358
01:09:46,883 --> 01:09:49,286
WE'RE WATCHING A MOVIE.
1359
01:09:49,319 --> 01:09:50,620
YES!
NO, I WANT YOU RIGHT HERE.
1360
01:09:52,756 --> 01:09:55,825
WHAT HAPPENED?
OKAY...
1361
01:09:55,859 --> 01:09:58,295
DO WE GOTTA CLEAN
ALL THAT UP?
1362
01:10:08,638 --> 01:10:11,241
THERE'S TOO MUCH.
1363
01:10:11,275 --> 01:10:12,909
HEY, GUYS.
LEAVE IT.
1364
01:10:12,942 --> 01:10:15,845
JUST LEAVE IT.
1365
01:10:15,879 --> 01:10:17,414
NEW PLAN.
1366
01:10:17,447 --> 01:10:19,983
I SAY FORGET THE STOP MOTION.
1367
01:10:20,016 --> 01:10:22,352
WHAT MOVIE
DO YOU GUYS WANT TO MAKE?
1368
01:10:22,386 --> 01:10:24,621
I WANT TO MAKE A MOVIE
ABOUT FARTS.
1369
01:10:24,654 --> 01:10:26,323
ALRIGHT, GREAT.
LET'S DO IT.
1370
01:10:26,356 --> 01:10:27,557
FARTS.
ZOMBIES!
1371
01:10:27,591 --> 01:10:29,826
ZOMBIES?
AWESOME.
1372
01:10:29,859 --> 01:10:30,960
BOOGERS!
1373
01:10:33,697 --> 01:10:34,764
WHAT ELSE HAVE WE GOT?
IT'S A GOOD START.
1374
01:10:34,798 --> 01:10:35,765
WHAT ELSE DO WE HAVE HERE?
1375
01:10:35,799 --> 01:10:38,468
I WANT BOOGERS IN MY MOVIE.
1376
01:10:38,502 --> 01:10:40,270
BOOGERS.
THERE WE GO.
1377
01:10:40,304 --> 01:10:42,038
BUTTS.
BUTTS.
1378
01:10:42,071 --> 01:10:44,007
YOU GUYS ARE IN THE ZONE.
KEEP IT FLOWING.
1379
01:10:44,040 --> 01:10:45,842
NAKED NINJAS!
1380
01:10:45,875 --> 01:10:47,811
I'M NOT A ZOMBIE.
I'M JUST A BOY.
1381
01:10:47,844 --> 01:10:49,779
BUT YOU'RE MAKING
THE ZOMBIE MASK.
1382
01:10:49,813 --> 01:10:51,448
IT DOESN'T MATTER
IF IT'S YOUR CHARACTER.
1383
01:10:51,481 --> 01:10:52,716
YOU'RE JUST MAKING IT UP.
1384
01:10:52,749 --> 01:10:54,651
CAN IT HAVE MORE EYES
THAN TWO?
1385
01:10:54,684 --> 01:10:55,885
YES.
1386
01:10:55,919 --> 01:10:57,354
ZOMBIES HAVE AS MANY EYES
1387
01:10:57,387 --> 01:11:00,324
AS YOU WANT THEM TO HAVE.
1388
01:11:00,357 --> 01:11:03,393
[OVERLAPPING CHATTER]
1389
01:11:15,405 --> 01:11:17,907
[ZOMBIE FLATULENCE]
1390
01:11:27,451 --> 01:11:29,285
[FLATULENCE]
1391
01:11:33,823 --> 01:11:36,626
WELCOME TO THE "BROOKLYN KIDZ
MOOVIE MAKER,
1392
01:11:36,660 --> 01:11:38,728
FINAL SCREENING."
1393
01:11:38,762 --> 01:11:41,465
FIRST WE SCREEN
THE ADVANCED CLASS,
1394
01:11:41,498 --> 01:11:43,967
AND THE NON-ADVANCED CLASS.
1395
01:11:44,000 --> 01:11:45,435
THANK YOU FOR COMING.
1396
01:11:45,469 --> 01:11:48,104
[APPLAUSE]
1397
01:11:48,137 --> 01:11:50,507
I WROTE THAT SPEECH.
1398
01:11:54,744 --> 01:11:58,982
*
1399
01:12:02,619 --> 01:12:08,592
*
1400
01:12:50,534 --> 01:12:52,035
[APPLAUSE]
1401
01:13:05,449 --> 01:13:07,951
[LIVELY PIANO MUSIC]
1402
01:13:07,984 --> 01:13:10,887
[FLATULENCE]
1403
01:13:14,691 --> 01:13:16,926
I LOVE FARTING.
1404
01:13:16,960 --> 01:13:19,629
[FLATULENCE]
1405
01:13:19,663 --> 01:13:22,766
[FLATULENCE CONTINUES]
1406
01:13:29,473 --> 01:13:31,508
[GROWLING]
1407
01:13:34,243 --> 01:13:35,845
[MONSTERS GROWLING]
1408
01:13:35,879 --> 01:13:42,752
*
1409
01:13:52,095 --> 01:13:54,598
I CAN'T FART.
1410
01:13:56,900 --> 01:13:59,202
[FLATULENCE]
1411
01:13:59,235 --> 01:14:01,104
[KIDS LAUGH]
1412
01:14:01,137 --> 01:14:03,172
[APPLAUSE]
1413
01:14:09,713 --> 01:14:11,848
OH, YOU GUYS.
1414
01:14:11,881 --> 01:14:14,818
THEY'RE BEAUTIFUL.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
1415
01:14:14,851 --> 01:14:16,019
[GIRL]
YOU'RE WELCOME.
1416
01:14:16,052 --> 01:14:17,721
YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST.
1417
01:14:17,754 --> 01:14:20,123
[SIGHS]
THANK YOU.
1418
01:14:20,156 --> 01:14:21,491
THANK YOU.
1419
01:14:26,162 --> 01:14:28,197
SHIRIN.
HI, KEN.
1420
01:14:28,231 --> 01:14:30,567
SO, THAT WAS...
1421
01:14:30,600 --> 01:14:32,268
DISGUSTING.
I'M SO SORRY.
1422
01:14:32,301 --> 01:14:34,270
ACTUALLY, I THOUGHT
IT WAS HILARIOUS.
1423
01:14:34,303 --> 01:14:36,840
SERIOUSLY?
1424
01:14:36,873 --> 01:14:39,776
YEAH.
I WAS CRACKIN' UP.
1425
01:14:39,809 --> 01:14:41,578
THANK YOU SO MUCH
FOR SAYING THAT.
YEAH.
1426
01:14:41,611 --> 01:14:43,146
LET'S FACE IT,
FARTS ARE FUNNY.
1427
01:14:43,179 --> 01:14:45,214
I AGREE.
FARTS ARE FUNNY.
1428
01:14:45,248 --> 01:14:46,883
THANK YOU.
1429
01:14:59,663 --> 01:15:01,531
HAVE YOU SEEN CARRINGTON?
1430
01:15:19,716 --> 01:15:22,051
HEY, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
1431
01:15:22,085 --> 01:15:25,589
HIDING.
1432
01:15:25,622 --> 01:15:28,658
I'M SORRY I'VE BEEN
SUCH A DICK ABOUT LAYLI.
1433
01:15:28,692 --> 01:15:29,959
AW, COME ON,
FORGET IT.
1434
01:15:29,993 --> 01:15:31,561
COME ON, LET'S GO INSIDE.
1435
01:15:31,595 --> 01:15:37,967
MY OLD ROOMMATE MAXINE AND I
WERE IN A RELATIONSHIP.
1436
01:15:38,001 --> 01:15:41,304
AH, SO YOU'RE A LESBIAN.
1437
01:15:41,337 --> 01:15:43,172
I WAS PRETTY INTO
ALL THE GUYS I WAS WITH,
1438
01:15:43,206 --> 01:15:46,943
SO I THINK I'M BISEXUAL.
1439
01:15:46,976 --> 01:15:50,246
AND THAT'S A THING?
1440
01:15:50,279 --> 01:15:52,081
I'M AFRAID SO.
1441
01:15:52,115 --> 01:15:55,251
ALL RIGHT.
1442
01:15:55,284 --> 01:15:56,953
HOW DO YOU THINK MOM AND DAD
ARE GONNA TAKE IT?
1443
01:15:56,986 --> 01:16:00,223
OH, YOU'RE NOT GONNA
TELL THEM NOW THAT IT'S OVER.
1444
01:16:00,256 --> 01:16:03,026
SEEMS LIKE A PRETTY BIG THING
TO NOT BE HONEST ABOUT.
1445
01:16:03,059 --> 01:16:04,994
FINE.
1446
01:16:05,028 --> 01:16:07,130
JUST UH, WAIT UNTIL AFTER
THE WEDDING, ALRIGHT?
1447
01:16:07,163 --> 01:16:08,865
[LAUGHS]
1448
01:16:08,898 --> 01:16:10,767
YOU ARE SUCH A DICK.
1449
01:16:10,800 --> 01:16:13,002
WELL, AT LEAST I'M NOT
A SEXUALLY CONFUSED NARCISSIST.
1450
01:16:13,036 --> 01:16:14,203
CAN WE PLEASE GO INSIDE?
1451
01:16:14,237 --> 01:16:16,706
HEY, CAN I BE
YOUR BEST MAN?
1452
01:16:16,740 --> 01:16:18,608
NO,
ABSOLUTELY NOT.
1453
01:16:18,642 --> 01:16:20,276
[LAUGHS]
1454
01:16:20,309 --> 01:16:21,911
*
1455
01:16:23,312 --> 01:16:26,215
I ATE BEFORE I CAME.
1456
01:16:32,055 --> 01:16:33,690
OW, FUCK!
1457
01:16:34,791 --> 01:16:36,826
OW! SHIT.
1458
01:16:36,860 --> 01:16:39,362
[EXHALES]
1459
01:16:48,972 --> 01:16:50,940
I'M SORRY I RUINED
YOUR SCARF.
1460
01:16:50,974 --> 01:16:52,275
[NATIVE LANGUAGE]
1461
01:17:08,257 --> 01:17:11,895
MOM, I'M A LITTLE BIT GAY.
1462
01:17:16,966 --> 01:17:18,735
YES, I AM.
1463
01:17:18,768 --> 01:17:21,404
AND I WAS IN LOVE
WITH MAXINE.
1464
01:17:21,437 --> 01:17:23,807
SHH.
1465
01:17:43,359 --> 01:17:45,962
*
1466
01:18:43,286 --> 01:18:45,421
SHIRIN, ARE YOU OKAY?
1467
01:18:45,454 --> 01:18:49,425
I'M OKAY.
1468
01:18:54,463 --> 01:18:55,498
[SIGHS]
1469
01:18:55,531 --> 01:18:58,001
STOP BREATHING SO LOUD.
1470
01:19:01,805 --> 01:19:03,439
OKAY.
1471
01:19:46,149 --> 01:19:47,550
HAS YOUR MOM
MENTIONED IT?
1472
01:19:47,583 --> 01:19:49,418
NO.
1473
01:19:49,452 --> 01:19:51,420
MAYBE SHE DIDN'T
UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEANT.
1474
01:19:51,454 --> 01:19:53,422
NO, SHE KNOWS FOR SURE
WHAT'S UP.
1475
01:19:53,456 --> 01:19:57,260
I'M GONNA BRING IT
UP IN ABOUT A MONTH.
1476
01:19:57,293 --> 01:19:58,928
I'M PROUD OF YOU.
1477
01:19:58,962 --> 01:20:00,363
THANKS.
1478
01:20:00,396 --> 01:20:02,298
THERE'S A PARTY
AT THE LOFT ON SATURDAY.
1479
01:20:02,331 --> 01:20:04,067
YOU SHOULD BRING THAT
WAITER, BRENDAN.
1480
01:20:04,100 --> 01:20:06,903
UM, I WOULD, BUT I KINDA
WANT TO SEE IF JACQUES
1481
01:20:06,936 --> 01:20:08,237
AND FELICIA TRY TO SEDUCE ME.
1482
01:20:08,271 --> 01:20:09,973
IT'S NEVER GONNA HAPPEN.
1483
01:20:10,006 --> 01:20:11,240
I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU THINK
THEY'RE SWINGERS.
1484
01:20:11,274 --> 01:20:12,575
I JUST GET THAT VIBE.
1485
01:20:12,608 --> 01:20:15,111
YOU SHOULD INVITE
THAT GAY LAWYER.
1486
01:20:15,144 --> 01:20:16,345
DID YOU GUYS TOUCH TONGUES?
1487
01:20:16,379 --> 01:20:17,546
NO, WE DIDN'T,
1488
01:20:17,580 --> 01:20:19,315
AND IT ACTUALLY HURT
MY FEELINGS.
1489
01:20:19,348 --> 01:20:21,284
NO, YOU KNOW, THERE ARE
PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD
1490
01:20:21,317 --> 01:20:23,252
WHO GO ON FIRST DATES
THAT ARE PERFECTLY GREAT,
1491
01:20:23,286 --> 01:20:25,154
AND THEN THEY WAIT A WHILE
BEFORE THEY ENGAGE
1492
01:20:25,188 --> 01:20:26,322
IN SEXUAL CONTACT.
1493
01:20:26,355 --> 01:20:27,891
THAT'S DISGUSTING.
1494
01:20:27,924 --> 01:20:32,328
I KNOW, I THINK IT ALL HAPPENS
OUTSIDE OF NEW YORK.
1495
01:20:32,361 --> 01:20:34,097
MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.
1496
01:21:02,458 --> 01:21:04,894
*
1497
01:21:15,338 --> 01:21:17,907
WHEN HE TEXTS ME,
IT'S LIKE HE ONLY TEXTS ME
1498
01:21:17,941 --> 01:21:19,108
USING EMOTICONS.
1499
01:21:19,142 --> 01:21:20,276
WHY CAN'T YOU
USE YOUR WORDS?
1500
01:21:20,309 --> 01:21:21,577
DO YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
1501
01:21:21,610 --> 01:21:25,381
I THINK THAT HE THINKS THAT
THAT IS LIKE CUTE.
1502
01:21:25,414 --> 01:21:27,650
I AND LIKE...
1503
01:21:41,965 --> 01:21:44,333
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
1504
01:22:00,116 --> 01:22:04,387
* YOU DIDN'T KNOW
1505
01:22:04,420 --> 01:22:08,024
* WHERE TO GO
1506
01:22:08,057 --> 01:22:14,630
* WALKING AROUND
IN THIS FLAG-WAVING TOWN *
1507
01:22:14,663 --> 01:22:21,404
* I SAW YOU WAITING
FOR A TRAIN *
1508
01:22:21,437 --> 01:22:25,274
* AND YOU DISAPPEARED
1509
01:22:25,308 --> 01:22:29,412
* YOUR FACE PRESSED UP
TO THE WINDOW *
1510
01:22:43,259 --> 01:22:49,532
* YOU WENT SO FAR AWAY
1511
01:22:49,565 --> 01:22:53,569
* AND I WANT
TO COME THERE TOO *
1512
01:22:53,602 --> 01:22:57,373
* I WANT TO BE WITH YOU
1513
01:22:57,406 --> 01:23:04,347
* I'M JUST WAITING
UNTIL YOU SAY THESE WORDS *
1514
01:23:04,380 --> 01:23:08,217
* COME BACK, COME BACK,
1515
01:23:08,251 --> 01:23:12,221
* COME BACK,
OH, TO ME *
1516
01:23:14,090 --> 01:23:18,594
* I'M LIVING NEAR GDANSK
1517
01:23:18,627 --> 01:23:21,697
* THERE'S A TRAIN,
YOU'D BE HERE SOON *
1518
01:23:21,730 --> 01:23:25,634
* THERE'S A LIFE
FOR ME AND YOU *
1519
01:23:25,668 --> 01:23:32,075
* THE EAST
MEANS SO MANY THINGS *
1520
01:23:32,108 --> 01:23:36,112
* BUT IT COULD BE HOME,
IT COULD BE HOME *
1521
01:23:36,145 --> 01:23:38,047
* IT COULD BE HOME
1522
01:23:38,081 --> 01:23:44,620
* IT COULD BE HOME
FOR YOU AND ME *
1523
01:23:46,489 --> 01:23:49,358
[VOCALIZING]
1524
01:23:53,562 --> 01:23:56,699
* IT COULD BE HOME,
IT COULD BE HOME *
1525
01:23:56,732 --> 01:24:00,236
* IT COULD BE HOME,
IT COULD BE HOME *
1526
01:24:00,269 --> 01:24:03,572
* COME BACK, COME BACK
1527
01:24:03,606 --> 01:24:08,744
* COME BACK,
OH, TO ME *
1528
01:24:29,265 --> 01:24:36,305
* AND IF YOU'D EVER
SAY THOSE WORDS *
1529
01:24:36,339 --> 01:24:38,607
* I'D COME TO YOU
1530
01:24:38,641 --> 01:24:40,243
* WHERE YOU ARE
1531
01:24:40,276 --> 01:24:43,379
* IT'S TOO HARD TO BE APART
1532
01:24:43,412 --> 01:24:50,519
* THE EAST'S NOT
SO FAR AWAY *
1533
01:24:50,553 --> 01:24:52,288
* BUT IT COULD BE HOME
1534
01:24:52,321 --> 01:24:55,458
* IT COULD BE HOME,
IT COULD BE HOME *
1535
01:24:55,491 --> 01:25:01,664
* IT COULD BE HOME
FOR YOU AND ME *
1536
01:25:04,167 --> 01:25:07,636
[VOCALIZING]
1537
01:25:11,240 --> 01:25:14,410
* IT COULD BE HOME,
IT COULD BE HOME *
1538
01:25:14,443 --> 01:25:17,780
* IT COULD BE HOME,
IT COULD BE HOME *
1539
01:25:17,813 --> 01:25:21,384
* COME BACK, COME BACK
1540
01:25:21,417 --> 01:25:26,755
* COME BACK
OH, TO ME *
98687
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