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00:00:00,167 --> 00:00:03,170
[whistling theme music]
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00:00:13,555 --> 00:00:15,224
♪ One, two
One, two, three ♪
3
00:00:15,224 --> 00:00:18,894
♪ La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la ♪
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00:00:22,606 --> 00:00:25,359
♪ La, la, la, la ♪
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00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:28,237
[whistling]
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00:00:30,948 --> 00:00:33,742
You might be a farmer
if "business attire"
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00:00:33,742 --> 00:00:36,536
means wearin' overalls
with the good stains!
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00:00:37,162 --> 00:00:41,166
[laughing uproariously]
"The good stains!"
9
00:00:41,166 --> 00:00:43,794
Ah, Fred the Farmer's
the best comedian there is!
10
00:00:43,794 --> 00:00:46,088
- [Gramma] Mm-hmm.
- He isn't without his charm.
11
00:00:46,088 --> 00:00:48,131
- I don't get him.
- Well, I get him!
12
00:00:48,131 --> 00:00:51,510
It's as if he peers
into my very soul!
13
00:00:51,510 --> 00:00:54,221
Every time Fred makes a joke
about scoopin' manure,
14
00:00:54,221 --> 00:00:56,974
or gettin' kicked in the face
by a mule, I think,
15
00:00:56,974 --> 00:01:01,270
"Hey, I've scooped manure,
I've been kicked in the face
by a mule!"
16
00:01:01,270 --> 00:01:04,648
Ah, he's a real farmer,
through and through.
17
00:01:04,648 --> 00:01:06,400
Well, that certainly
explains why you made us
18
00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:09,152
stand in line for two hours
just to meet him.
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00:01:09,152 --> 00:01:11,613
- [marker pens squeaking]
- [hocks spit]
20
00:01:11,613 --> 00:01:14,950
Whee! We should have come
even earlier. What should
I get him to sign?
21
00:01:14,950 --> 00:01:17,160
Maybe I'll ask him what
type of soil he uses?
22
00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:19,454
- [rope gate closes]
- Huh? Hey, where's Fred?
23
00:01:19,454 --> 00:01:21,039
Oh, you just missed him.
24
00:01:21,039 --> 00:01:23,250
He's prepping for his set.
But hey, cheer up!
25
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:25,961
How would you like an official
Fred the Farmer pitchfork?
26
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It's only $49.99.
27
00:01:27,879 --> 00:01:29,881
- Uh, sir?
- Fred, wait!
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00:01:29,881 --> 00:01:33,552
- I didn't get to meet you!
- [crashing]
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00:01:33,552 --> 00:01:35,429
Fred's busy!
30
00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:37,222
Aahh!
[groans]
31
00:01:37,222 --> 00:01:39,266
Well, we're not
gettin' in that way.
32
00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:42,436
Whaddya say we sneak around back
so you can still meet Fred?
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00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:45,897
Mom, you're a genius!
Kids, go grab us some seats.
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00:01:45,897 --> 00:01:49,443
- On it!
- I'm gonna meet Fred
or die tryin'.
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00:01:49,443 --> 00:01:51,111
No one's dyin', Bill.
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00:01:51,111 --> 00:01:55,157
Good evening,
Guffaw Factory-y-y!
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00:01:55,157 --> 00:01:56,908
You guys ready to guffaw?
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00:01:56,908 --> 00:01:59,369
'Cause our opening act
is an amazing roast comedian!
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00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:03,874
Everybody, give it up
for Jessica Burns!
40
00:02:03,874 --> 00:02:06,168
Thank you, thank you!
Whoa!
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00:02:06,168 --> 00:02:08,628
How much hairspray
do you use, emcee?
42
00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:10,630
This is a comedy club,
not a construction site!
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00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,424
[boisterous laughing]
44
00:02:12,424 --> 00:02:15,135
Wait, so the roast comedian
gets to make fun of people,
45
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:16,678
and everyone laughs?
46
00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:18,597
I didn't know
you could do that!
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00:02:18,597 --> 00:02:21,850
Personally, I prefer
more classic comedy.
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00:02:21,850 --> 00:02:24,644
[slapstick from vaudeville,
piano playing]
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00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:26,980
- [giggling]
- Not me.
50
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:30,442
She's droppin' truth bombs,
and I'm here for the booms!
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00:02:30,442 --> 00:02:33,570
Sneakin' in through the back
was a great idea, Ma.
52
00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:35,572
Fred the Farmer, here I come!
53
00:02:35,572 --> 00:02:37,949
- Oh...
- Hey. Comedians only.
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00:02:37,949 --> 00:02:40,744
He is a comedian.
Can't you tell?
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00:02:40,744 --> 00:02:43,914
Uh, yeah.
And this is my Ma.
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00:02:43,914 --> 00:02:47,542
- Your "Ma"?
- Uh, my Ma-nager.
57
00:02:47,542 --> 00:02:50,712
Her job is to Ma-nage me.
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00:02:50,712 --> 00:02:53,256
If you're really a comedian,
tell me a joke!
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00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:56,718
Uh, well, you might be
a farmer, if...
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00:02:56,718 --> 00:02:58,678
your job involves
raising agriculture,
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00:02:58,678 --> 00:03:02,599
or living organisms,
for the creation of food
or raw materials!
62
00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:05,769
- Hmm. Oh-ho! I get it!
- [both] You do?
63
00:03:05,769 --> 00:03:08,980
Yeah! It's one of those
"ironic bits."
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00:03:08,980 --> 00:03:11,817
It's funny, because
it's so... "unfunny."
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00:03:11,817 --> 00:03:14,569
- Go right on in.
- Oh, thanks.
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00:03:15,278 --> 00:03:17,781
- Whoa!
- [chattering, noise makers]
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00:03:17,781 --> 00:03:19,366
This is my nightmare.
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00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:22,786
Ma, focus! We gotta figure out
how to find Fred.
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00:03:22,786 --> 00:03:26,081
- Good luck tonight, man!
- Thank ya kindly!
See ya out there.
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00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:31,753
[gasps] This is supposed to be
the best day of my life!
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00:03:31,753 --> 00:03:33,797
I'm kiddin', I'm kiddin'.
But for real--
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00:03:33,797 --> 00:03:35,799
Is that a dress?
Or a paper bag?
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[raucous laughing]
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00:03:37,551 --> 00:03:39,928
Her dress is ugly!
75
00:03:39,928 --> 00:03:41,638
Aw, man, I gotta get in
on the action!
76
00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:43,098
Wait, Cricket!
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00:03:43,098 --> 00:03:46,351
Hey! Hey, Jessica.
Roast me! Roast me!
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00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:48,687
Oh, really let me have it.
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00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:50,313
I mean, where do I begin?
80
00:03:50,313 --> 00:03:53,191
Maybe how hilariously big
my muscles are?
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00:03:53,191 --> 00:03:55,652
- [Jessica] How 'bout that
ridiculous bowl cut?
- Heh?
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00:03:55,652 --> 00:03:58,530
Lookin' like a giant lemon
wearin' a mustache for a hat--
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00:03:58,530 --> 00:03:59,906
but that's your best feature.
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00:03:59,906 --> 00:04:01,324
[audience laughing]
85
00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:03,869
Gramma said it is
my best feature.
86
00:04:03,869 --> 00:04:08,039
And look at those bare feet
with all of those crusted
toenails-- all on display.
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00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:10,459
Someone call the Hazmat team!
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00:04:10,459 --> 00:04:14,004
[pained chuckling]
Yeah, this is so... funny...
89
00:04:14,754 --> 00:04:17,424
[Bill] I can't believe
I'm looking at Fred's
dressing room door!
90
00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:19,593
Ohh, I'm so nervous.
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00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,219
- [creaking]
- Huh?
92
00:04:21,219 --> 00:04:24,431
Yes, I'm calling to correct
an egregious error.
93
00:04:24,431 --> 00:04:28,185
My paycheck must be addressed
to my actual name: Reginald.
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00:04:28,185 --> 00:04:31,313
"Fred the Farmer" is
merely a stage persona.
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00:04:31,313 --> 00:04:32,981
And don't you tell that
to anyone else.
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00:04:32,981 --> 00:04:36,234
He's... not a farmer?
97
00:04:37,736 --> 00:04:40,822
And this kid's head
is so big, it look like
he's eaten his neck!
98
00:04:40,822 --> 00:04:42,824
- [guffawing]
- Boy got no neck!
99
00:04:42,824 --> 00:04:44,367
Okay, we've had lots of fun,
100
00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:46,953
but perhaps we should all
rethink roasting
101
00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:48,455
as a form of comedy.
102
00:04:48,455 --> 00:04:50,123
It's starting to feel
a little one-note,
103
00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:51,041
if you ask me.
104
00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:52,334
Then how 'bout you take a shot
105
00:04:52,334 --> 00:04:53,794
at roasting me, li'l man?
106
00:04:53,794 --> 00:04:55,212
- [gasps]
- [mic feedback]
107
00:04:55,212 --> 00:04:58,340
Get ready for a roasting
of a lifetime!
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00:04:58,340 --> 00:05:00,383
This won't be good.
109
00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:02,886
You are... stupid!
110
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,180
[crickets chirping]
111
00:05:05,180 --> 00:05:08,600
Um... I said she's--
you're stupid!
112
00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:14,648
Ha. Ha. Well, you're also, uh...
You smell bad!
113
00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:15,732
[tiny cough]
114
00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:17,776
[nervous chuckling]
115
00:05:18,527 --> 00:05:22,155
Oh, look at you! Sweaty mess.
We got a little mop-up here.
116
00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:24,199
- [audience laughing]
- No. Nobody get a mop!
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00:05:24,199 --> 00:05:26,368
Nobody get a mop!
[crying]
118
00:05:26,368 --> 00:05:28,995
Well, what can I say?
Some people make my job easy.
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[audience laughing]
120
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I can't believe it. I thought
Fred was just like me!
121
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:35,001
But he's nothing like me.
122
00:05:35,001 --> 00:05:37,546
Yeah. Even his accent was fake!
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00:05:37,546 --> 00:05:40,423
He doesn't know the first thing
about what it's like
to be a farmer--
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Waking up before dawn
to work the fields,
125
00:05:42,968 --> 00:05:45,428
and toiling until
your fingers are raw!
126
00:05:45,428 --> 00:05:47,681
I'll donkey-kick him
in the larynx!
127
00:05:47,681 --> 00:05:49,850
He'll never tell
a joke again.
128
00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:52,310
I've got an even better idea.
129
00:05:52,310 --> 00:05:56,022
I'm going to get him to admit
he's not a real farmer on stage!
130
00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:58,650
So his audience can see him
for the fraud he is!
131
00:05:58,650 --> 00:06:02,571
Time to introduce Fred... oh.
Where's my mic?
132
00:06:02,571 --> 00:06:05,699
[Bill] Hey, y'all. I'm gonna be
your new emcee for the evening.
133
00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:09,035
Now, how about we give
a big Guffaw Factory welcome
134
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:12,789
- to Fred the Farmer.
- [audience cheering]
135
00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:14,916
Thanks! I'll take that.
136
00:06:14,916 --> 00:06:17,878
Well, Fred, first, I had
a few quick questions.
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00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:19,504
Since you're
a real farmer and all...
138
00:06:19,504 --> 00:06:21,423
Uh. Okay.
139
00:06:21,423 --> 00:06:23,967
What would you say
the best crop
irrigation system
140
00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:25,302
is for rutabagas?
141
00:06:25,302 --> 00:06:27,053
[uncomfortable laugh]
W-well,
142
00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:29,306
there's a few good options,
143
00:06:29,306 --> 00:06:32,642
but when I see a rutabaga,
I drool like crazy.
144
00:06:32,642 --> 00:06:34,853
That irrigates 'er real good!
145
00:06:34,853 --> 00:06:36,396
[audience laughing]
146
00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:38,565
All right, wise guy.
147
00:06:38,565 --> 00:06:42,736
If you were gonna upgrade
a Harvester 300, which model
would you choose?
148
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:45,155
You must be specific.
149
00:06:45,155 --> 00:06:49,117
Um... There's the DOSS-12,
of course.
150
00:06:49,117 --> 00:06:51,077
I like the torque in it.
151
00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:54,664
- DOSS-12? What-- Hey!
- Hey, wha-- Wait!
152
00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:58,710
- He just read the label
off this water bottle!
- [audience gasps]
153
00:06:58,710 --> 00:07:02,756
The reason he doesn't know
that is 'cause your beloved
Fred the Farmer
154
00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:04,591
isn't a real farmer!
155
00:07:04,591 --> 00:07:08,428
Fred ain't even his real name!
It's Reginald.
156
00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:10,597
[British accent] Egad!
How did you-- [gasps]
157
00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:15,101
- Hey, he's talkin' fancy!
- This is a tight five minutes
of lies!
158
00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:17,187
- [loud booing]
- Oh, dear...
159
00:07:17,187 --> 00:07:18,647
[grunting]
160
00:07:18,647 --> 00:07:21,441
[British accent] Ah, no!
Why are you doing this?
161
00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:23,568
Because I thought
you were like me!
162
00:07:23,568 --> 00:07:27,322
A real, honest-to-goodness,
hardworking farmer!
163
00:07:27,322 --> 00:07:30,158
All right.
All right, I confess.
164
00:07:30,158 --> 00:07:33,787
I'm not a real farmer,
but I wanted to be.
165
00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:38,083
My father was a real farmer,
and that was my dream, too.
166
00:07:38,083 --> 00:07:40,752
- But...
- Father! Look hither!
167
00:07:40,752 --> 00:07:43,963
- Uh-oh.
- Aw son, you done went
and did it again.
168
00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:46,132
Oh, jolly bad.
169
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:48,259
Oh, I don't know
how I ended up
170
00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:50,512
with a little British boy
for a son.
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00:07:50,512 --> 00:07:52,555
I know this is corny,
172
00:07:52,555 --> 00:07:55,392
but I don't think
I'm berry good at farming!
173
00:07:55,392 --> 00:07:58,520
[chuckles] You may not
have a green thumb,
174
00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:00,689
but you certainly have
a colorful wit.
175
00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:02,232
[moans happily]
176
00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:04,776
[Reginald] Creating
the character of
Fred the Farmer
177
00:08:04,776 --> 00:08:07,570
was my way of honoring
my father,
178
00:08:07,570 --> 00:08:10,949
and so, I spent my life
waking up before the dawn,
179
00:08:10,949 --> 00:08:13,493
scouting comedy,
writing jokes,
180
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:16,162
toiling until my fingers
were raw...
181
00:08:16,162 --> 00:08:19,541
all to make him proud.
182
00:08:19,541 --> 00:08:21,793
All that hard work
and sacrifice?
183
00:08:21,793 --> 00:08:25,964
I was so wrong about you, Fred.
You really are like me.
184
00:08:25,964 --> 00:08:28,967
But instead of growing crops,
you grow chuckles!
185
00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:31,761
- You're the real deal.
- [audience] Fred's a fraud!
186
00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:34,889
Hoo, boy! I got them
good and riled, Fred.
187
00:08:34,889 --> 00:08:36,891
- The dead man!
- Oh, no!
188
00:08:36,891 --> 00:08:38,268
What have I done?
189
00:08:38,268 --> 00:08:40,061
- [door rattling]
- Cricket? Oh! Uh...
190
00:08:40,061 --> 00:08:42,021
There you are, brother.
You okay?
191
00:08:42,021 --> 00:08:45,817
[sniffs] Huh? Me?
I'm fine.
192
00:08:45,817 --> 00:08:49,696
Jessica just said
a lot of words that totally
didn't bother me at all.
193
00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:52,574
People were only laughing
because of her dumb face.
194
00:08:52,574 --> 00:08:54,492
[Tilly laughs]
195
00:08:54,492 --> 00:08:56,995
Yeah! She thinks
she's so funny.
196
00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:59,080
But really, she's like,
"Waaah-waaah."
197
00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:00,874
[Tilly laughing hysterically]
198
00:09:00,874 --> 00:09:03,084
Stop! You're too funny!
199
00:09:04,961 --> 00:09:06,963
Thanks for
cheering me up, Tilly.
200
00:09:06,963 --> 00:09:09,132
That's what
big sisters are for.
201
00:09:09,132 --> 00:09:11,426
Yeah. Just wish I had
the last laugh, though.
202
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:15,305
That can be arranged.
203
00:09:15,305 --> 00:09:18,224
Fred the Farmer will reap
the treachery he's sown,
204
00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:20,685
with his own merchandise!
205
00:09:20,685 --> 00:09:21,978
[audience screaming]
206
00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:25,815
It's a madhouse out there!
207
00:09:25,815 --> 00:09:30,278
Ain't it beautiful? Ya got 'em
mad, he ain't a real farmer!
208
00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:32,363
Well, if they want
a real farmer,
209
00:09:32,363 --> 00:09:34,532
then they're gonna get
a real farmer.
210
00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:36,618
Huh?
What are you thinkin', boy?
211
00:09:36,618 --> 00:09:39,662
You can't do stand-up comedy.
You'll bomb!
212
00:09:39,662 --> 00:09:41,623
I know.
213
00:09:41,623 --> 00:09:43,458
[angry mob screaming]
214
00:09:43,458 --> 00:09:46,669
Everybody!
Lend me your ears!
215
00:09:46,669 --> 00:09:50,632
- I'm Bill. A real farmer.
- Get him!
216
00:09:50,632 --> 00:09:52,133
- Huh?
- What do you get
217
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:55,345
when you cross-pollinate
a cucumber and a squash?
218
00:09:56,721 --> 00:09:58,723
- [man] What?
- Nothin'.
219
00:09:58,723 --> 00:10:01,643
You can only do that with
different varieties of plants.
220
00:10:01,643 --> 00:10:03,895
Not species. Hey-o!
221
00:10:03,895 --> 00:10:05,396
[crowd booing, yelling]
222
00:10:06,481 --> 00:10:09,400
We came here to laugh,
not to learn!
223
00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:11,444
- Kill him!
- [screaming]
224
00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:13,988
Wait, wait, wait!
You wanted a real farmer,
225
00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:19,077
and that's what I gave you.
So, how about a real
comedian, instead?
226
00:10:19,828 --> 00:10:23,289
[British accent] Uh,
it's a good thing that
I'm not a real farmer...
227
00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:26,417
[American accent]
...or my jokes would
sound like his.
228
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:28,711
[all giggling]
229
00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:33,091
No, but seriously, I ain't seen
this many angry faces
230
00:10:33,091 --> 00:10:37,804
since my cattle found out
what the secret ingredient
to my burgers is.
231
00:10:37,804 --> 00:10:39,806
- Them!
- [laughing]
232
00:10:39,806 --> 00:10:41,766
Oh, Fred! [laughing]
233
00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:47,647
- I still don't get him.
- Well, I think I get him
even more.
234
00:10:48,314 --> 00:10:51,025
Hmm. Say, you seen
the kids anywhere?
235
00:10:51,025 --> 00:10:53,027
Wild show tonight, y'all.
236
00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:55,113
Whoa! [grunts]
237
00:10:55,113 --> 00:10:57,532
[Tilly & Cricket laughing]
238
00:10:57,949 --> 00:11:00,034
[sighs]
Nothing beats a classic.
239
00:11:01,703 --> 00:11:03,079
♪
240
00:11:03,079 --> 00:11:05,248
Great work today, family.
241
00:11:05,248 --> 00:11:08,418
Despite being down one Green,
we sped right through
those chores.
242
00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:10,670
I still hope Cricket
is feeling better.
243
00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:14,132
I still can't believe
he said Melissa the goat
tried to eat his arm off.
244
00:11:14,132 --> 00:11:17,760
Yeah. Pretty convenient
Cricket got hurt on chore day.
245
00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:20,805
Well, since we work so hard,
maybe we could...
246
00:11:20,805 --> 00:11:23,224
treat ourselves early to
that strawberry cake you made?
247
00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:25,310
[Tilly gasps]
Oh, yes, Mama, please?
248
00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:28,354
Sure! But keep in mind,
I'm not much of a baker.
249
00:11:28,354 --> 00:11:30,106
Definitely not Alice-level.
250
00:11:30,106 --> 00:11:33,818
- Yessir.
- This cake was always
my dad's favorite.
251
00:11:33,818 --> 00:11:37,322
And despite
our rocky relationship,
it always brought us together.
252
00:11:37,322 --> 00:11:38,740
[blows raspberry]
253
00:11:38,740 --> 00:11:40,491
That's how good it is.
254
00:11:40,491 --> 00:11:43,411
- Now, who wants some cake?
- Me! Me! Me!
255
00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:45,371
- Let's dig in.
- [all gasp]
256
00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:51,961
- My cake!
- Oh, no. How could
this have happened?
257
00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:53,963
All of us were outside,
doin' chores.
258
00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:56,507
- Not all of us.
- [both] Cricket!
259
00:11:56,507 --> 00:12:00,094
- Cricket?
- Ha-ha! That's me name.
Don't wear it out.
260
00:12:00,094 --> 00:12:02,222
What do you have to say
about this?
261
00:12:02,222 --> 00:12:04,474
The heck? You guys ate
all the cake without me?
262
00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:07,977
- Nice try. We know you ate it.
- What? No, I didn't.
263
00:12:07,977 --> 00:12:10,772
Cricket, your mom worked
real hard on that cake.
264
00:12:10,772 --> 00:12:13,566
And some of us thought
we deserved a little treat.
265
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:17,862
You were the only one home.
Therefore, the only one
who could have done it.
266
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:21,658
But it wasn't me! I was
upstairs, resting my hurt arm.
267
00:12:21,658 --> 00:12:23,743
I've heard enough.
Room! Now!
268
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:26,162
- Come on, up we go.
- But I'm innocent!
269
00:12:26,162 --> 00:12:29,624
Tilly, you believe me, right?
You know I wouldn't do this!
270
00:12:29,624 --> 00:12:33,252
Well, you were the only one
home, and... you do love cake.
271
00:12:33,252 --> 00:12:37,465
Please! I'm beggin' ya!
I invoke sibling code!
272
00:12:39,842 --> 00:12:42,595
- Sibling code?
- Papa? A minute.
273
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:45,765
Brother, sibling code
is a sacred oath of loyalty.
274
00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:48,309
Only to be invoked in
the most extreme situations.
275
00:12:48,309 --> 00:12:51,646
If you're lyin', I'll never
be able to trust you again.
276
00:12:51,646 --> 00:12:54,941
I know. But I swear on
sibling-hood I ain't.
277
00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:58,278
Okay, family.
I know my brother,
278
00:12:58,278 --> 00:13:02,031
and if he invokes sibling code,
then he is telling the truth.
279
00:13:02,031 --> 00:13:04,784
Therefore, I propose...
a trial!
280
00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:06,327
Oh!
281
00:13:06,327 --> 00:13:08,788
Oh, I could get into that.
282
00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:10,164
[Nancy groans] Fine!
283
00:13:10,164 --> 00:13:13,167
But the evidence is
pretty incriminating.
284
00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:17,130
Cricket is my baby brother.
I will defend him
in life and death.
285
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:18,840
It may take weeks. Months.
286
00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:20,758
You have an hour
while I make a new cake.
287
00:13:20,758 --> 00:13:21,676
We can work with that.
288
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:29,017
Court is now in session.
Let us begin.
289
00:13:29,017 --> 00:13:30,435
Lady and gentleman of the jury,
290
00:13:30,435 --> 00:13:32,395
Miss Mama Prosecutor.
291
00:13:32,395 --> 00:13:34,022
We've gathered here
to investigate a crime
292
00:13:34,022 --> 00:13:35,523
about a cake.
293
00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:37,358
Now. What makes a cake?
294
00:13:37,358 --> 00:13:39,819
Sugar? Flour? Sure.
295
00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:42,989
But you know what ingredient
is not in Mama's recipe?
296
00:13:42,989 --> 00:13:44,615
Injustice!
297
00:13:44,615 --> 00:13:46,743
And that is what
we have here today.
298
00:13:46,743 --> 00:13:49,037
Ooh, she got you good.
299
00:13:49,037 --> 00:13:50,663
Let us review the timeline.
300
00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:55,585
This morning, Mama finished
making the cake after breakfast.
301
00:13:55,585 --> 00:13:58,004
The four of us left to do chores
at 9:00 a.m.
302
00:13:58,004 --> 00:14:00,465
Leaving Cricket and his
injured arm home alone.
303
00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:03,301
At 11:20 a.m., we arrived
back at the house,
304
00:14:03,301 --> 00:14:05,428
at which point,
the cake was gone.
305
00:14:05,428 --> 00:14:08,264
Did anyone see the cake
between those times?
306
00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:09,932
Yeah. At 11:00. We were
all in the garden,
307
00:14:09,932 --> 00:14:12,018
and I checked on it
through the window.
308
00:14:12,018 --> 00:14:13,436
It was untouched.
309
00:14:13,436 --> 00:14:15,730
[whispering]
That means I'm innocent, right?
310
00:14:15,730 --> 00:14:21,736
No. It means Mama must prove
you ate the cake sometime
between 11:00 and 11:20.
311
00:14:21,736 --> 00:14:24,947
Easy. For starters, there's
a huge mess in the kitchen.
312
00:14:24,947 --> 00:14:27,450
And I know exactly
how it got there.
313
00:14:27,450 --> 00:14:30,536
Cricket would never leave out
delicious food for long.
314
00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:33,164
I bet he waited until he
thought it was safe to strike.
315
00:14:33,164 --> 00:14:34,832
[sneaky laugh]
316
00:14:34,832 --> 00:14:36,501
[Nancy] We all know,
when Cricket eats sugar,
317
00:14:36,501 --> 00:14:38,252
he goes hog wild,
318
00:14:38,252 --> 00:14:40,713
hence, destroying the kitchen!
319
00:14:40,713 --> 00:14:43,925
Cricket does get crazy
after dessert. Sometimes.
320
00:14:43,925 --> 00:14:47,386
- He'll just attack me!
- Let's throw the book at 'em!
321
00:14:47,386 --> 00:14:49,806
Seems like the jury
is in agreement.
322
00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:52,475
- [anxious moan]
- You make an interesting
point, Mama.
323
00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:56,562
- But also, nuh-uh.
- Huh?
324
00:14:56,562 --> 00:14:59,857
You said you saw the cake
from outside the house.
325
00:14:59,857 --> 00:15:02,860
Therefore, the mess
inside the house
326
00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:05,530
could have been caused
before 11:00 by anyone.
327
00:15:05,530 --> 00:15:07,490
Like Gramma!
328
00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:09,826
[gasps] I'm awake--
life sentence-- What?
329
00:15:09,826 --> 00:15:12,203
I mean, she carries a sword
around, for cryin' out loud.
330
00:15:12,203 --> 00:15:14,080
Causing ruin at every turn.
331
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:16,082
Objection!
332
00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:18,918
- Yeah, it tracks.
- Yeah. Yes, it does.
333
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:21,921
Guess we were wrong.
Maybe Cricket is innocent?
334
00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:24,882
Now hold up. We haven't
reviewed all the evidence.
335
00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:26,175
Follow me.
336
00:15:26,175 --> 00:15:30,096
Exhibit B.
This big sweat spot.
337
00:15:30,096 --> 00:15:32,890
And what could have caused
that big a spot?
338
00:15:32,890 --> 00:15:35,685
Well, eating a dessert
meant for five people,
339
00:15:35,685 --> 00:15:37,562
would pose a great
physical challenge,
340
00:15:37,562 --> 00:15:39,689
leading to involuntary perspiration,
341
00:15:39,689 --> 00:15:42,692
better known as...
"cake sweats!"
342
00:15:42,692 --> 00:15:45,820
- Gross!
- There is a big
sweat stain here.
343
00:15:45,820 --> 00:15:49,907
Made by someone in this room.
But who, may I ask?
344
00:15:49,907 --> 00:15:53,202
Papa, do you not also
profusely perspire?
345
00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:55,580
No! I only sweat
after farming.
346
00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:58,457
And cleanin' the house.
And when I'm being accused
of sweatin' a lot.
347
00:15:59,167 --> 00:16:02,503
- Oh, man!
- I'd say that speaks for itself.
348
00:16:02,503 --> 00:16:05,464
Without any physical evidence
to link my client to the crime,
349
00:16:05,464 --> 00:16:07,300
you cannot punish him.
350
00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:10,595
[groans] I guess I can't
prove Cricket ate the cake.
351
00:16:10,595 --> 00:16:14,599
That's right, baby.
I'm innocent! Up top!
352
00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:19,562
Cricket? Isn't that your arm
353
00:16:19,562 --> 00:16:21,772
that kept you from
doing chores today?
354
00:16:21,772 --> 00:16:27,069
Ahh... Oh, no!
I hurt so bad. I'm dying!
355
00:16:27,069 --> 00:16:31,199
Oh, I see the white light!
And it looks so... inviting!
356
00:16:31,199 --> 00:16:33,576
Ohhh... Waah.
357
00:16:34,744 --> 00:16:37,830
Nothin', really? Okay.
Yes, my arm isn't hurt.
358
00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:39,832
But that doesn't mean
I ate the cake!
359
00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:41,584
You still believe me,
right, Tilly?
360
00:16:41,584 --> 00:16:43,794
If he was lying
about his injury,
361
00:16:43,794 --> 00:16:47,131
how can we trust he's not
lying about eating the cake?
362
00:16:47,673 --> 00:16:49,842
- Cricket?
- Come on, I know this looks bad,
363
00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,928
but remember, "sibling code"?
364
00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:54,138
Sibling code.
365
00:16:54,138 --> 00:16:57,725
Okay, okay. Cricket may have
lied to get out of chores.
366
00:16:57,725 --> 00:16:59,727
But there is still
no physical evidence
367
00:16:59,727 --> 00:17:01,938
to link him to the crime
of cake eating.
368
00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:04,357
In fact, if Cricket
ate the cake,
369
00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,776
wouldn't there be some
trace of it on his person?
370
00:17:06,776 --> 00:17:09,195
After all, he is a messy eater.
371
00:17:09,195 --> 00:17:11,447
Brother, can you take
a little twirl for us?
372
00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:13,449
One twirl comin' up!
373
00:17:15,117 --> 00:17:16,202
[gasps]
374
00:17:16,202 --> 00:17:17,286
Is that...?
375
00:17:17,286 --> 00:17:19,372
Strawberry icing.
376
00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:22,750
No, no, no! We don't know
that it's strawberry icing!
377
00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:25,253
It could be... marker.
Or... ah, milkshake!
378
00:17:25,253 --> 00:17:26,879
From last 4th of July!
379
00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:30,049
Why don't you taste it
for yourself, if you're so sure.
380
00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:32,843
Fine. I'll prove once
and for all, that it's...
381
00:17:35,137 --> 00:17:37,223
Strawberry icing.
382
00:17:37,223 --> 00:17:40,726
I'm sorry, Tilly, but we've got
all the evidence we need,
right here.
383
00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:43,062
So, what do you say we call it?
384
00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:45,398
Ah... I call a recess!
385
00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:47,400
[groans] I can't believe
you, Cricket!
386
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:49,110
You abused sibling code!
387
00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:52,071
I didn't! I don't know how
the icing got on my arm.
388
00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:54,282
I was tellin' the truth before,
and I'm tellin' it now.
389
00:17:54,282 --> 00:17:58,119
Brother, you lied to me!
And you've broken my trust.
390
00:17:58,119 --> 00:17:59,578
Forever.
391
00:17:59,578 --> 00:18:02,748
Wow, this is the worst
day of my life!
392
00:18:02,748 --> 00:18:04,750
I was pinned for something
I didn't do.
393
00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:07,920
Lost your trust! And I even
missed my call with Gabriella.
394
00:18:08,546 --> 00:18:12,091
Wait. You had a video call
planned with Gabriella?
395
00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:15,011
- Why didn't you
mention it before?
- Well, 'cause it never happened.
396
00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:17,722
I was just about to call her
when y'all got back
from doin' chores.
397
00:18:17,722 --> 00:18:18,806
Oh, lemme see that.
398
00:18:20,558 --> 00:18:22,602
[softly]
Bingo, bango.
399
00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:27,773
- We'll fix it later.
- Everyone, stop
what you're doing!
400
00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:29,692
We were just waiting
for ya, sweetie.
401
00:18:29,692 --> 00:18:31,819
And your dirty,
thieving little brother.
402
00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:33,904
Now, I know we've heard
many theories today
403
00:18:33,904 --> 00:18:36,198
about what happened to
Mama's strawberry cake.
404
00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:38,034
And I'm here to tell you...
405
00:18:38,701 --> 00:18:40,745
that Cricket is very much
responsible for all the evidence
406
00:18:40,745 --> 00:18:42,788
- Mama presented.
- So you admit it!
407
00:18:42,788 --> 00:18:44,957
- Are you kidding me?
- You make me sick.
408
00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:47,084
Tilly? What are you doing?
409
00:18:47,084 --> 00:18:50,880
But... he's not responsible
for eatin' the cake.
410
00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:52,965
Allow me to explain.
During the recess,
411
00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:55,259
I learned that Cricket
had a video call planned
412
00:18:55,259 --> 00:18:57,428
with his big-city
girlfriend, Gabriella.
413
00:18:57,428 --> 00:19:00,389
Seen here, in this
drawing I found hidden
in Cricket's room.
414
00:19:00,389 --> 00:19:02,266
- Aint' that cute.
- The boy's an artist!
415
00:19:02,266 --> 00:19:05,019
- Nyah! What's your point, Tilly?
- I will get there.
416
00:19:05,019 --> 00:19:07,229
Cricket did lie
about his arm injury.
417
00:19:07,229 --> 00:19:09,357
Not as a way to be
alone with a cake,
418
00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:12,943
but instead, to prepare
for his video call with his GF.
419
00:19:12,943 --> 00:19:15,529
- And how's that?
- I'm glad you asked.
420
00:19:16,405 --> 00:19:19,325
First, I know that he becomes
incredibly nervous
421
00:19:19,325 --> 00:19:21,494
whenever he speaks
with Gabriella.
422
00:19:21,494 --> 00:19:23,871
When nervous, Cricket is prone
to singing and dancing
423
00:19:23,871 --> 00:19:27,041
with unbridled aggression,
in order to soothe himself.
424
00:19:27,041 --> 00:19:29,085
♪ I am the man
I am the monster man ♪
425
00:19:29,085 --> 00:19:32,338
Ayahh!
♪ I've just got to be free! ♪
426
00:19:32,338 --> 00:19:34,298
♪ Barracuda-- ♪
Wow!
427
00:19:34,298 --> 00:19:35,925
[mimicking guitar music]
428
00:19:35,925 --> 00:19:38,219
Second! Cricket could have
worked up quite a sweat.
429
00:19:38,219 --> 00:19:40,680
And for a creative boy,
anything could be a towel.
430
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:42,139
Including a cushion.
431
00:19:42,139 --> 00:19:44,308
[Gramma] I hand-sewed
those in 1950!
432
00:19:44,308 --> 00:19:47,269
And third! Cricket wanted
to climb up high,
433
00:19:47,269 --> 00:19:49,730
to make him feel
real tall and powerful.
434
00:19:49,730 --> 00:19:52,108
I feel so tall and powerful!
435
00:19:52,775 --> 00:19:54,318
Huh? Whoa-oh-wow!
436
00:19:54,318 --> 00:19:56,112
Whoa-a-a-a-a!
437
00:19:56,112 --> 00:19:59,532
Oh! That's exactly
what happened.
438
00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:02,201
That's all speculation.
You have no proof that Cricket
439
00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:04,745
didn't eat that cake
in the 20 minutes after.
440
00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:06,288
Au contraire!
441
00:20:06,288 --> 00:20:09,208
May I present to
the court, Exhibit C.
442
00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:12,420
Ahem! Hey, Gabby--
that's not it.
443
00:20:12,420 --> 00:20:15,548
Wassup, Gabs? No.
It's stupid! Stupid!
444
00:20:15,548 --> 00:20:17,383
Oh! Oh, no.
445
00:20:17,383 --> 00:20:19,885
You always rehearse before
makin' a phone call?
446
00:20:20,511 --> 00:20:23,013
- Gimme that tablet!
- It's for your honor!
447
00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:26,434
Cricket's rehearsal video is an
embarrassing 32 minutes long.
448
00:20:26,434 --> 00:20:27,852
Like, is cereal a soup?
449
00:20:27,852 --> 00:20:29,061
- Oh...
- Cricket!
450
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:30,438
Coming!
451
00:20:30,438 --> 00:20:32,606
This time-stamped video
clearly proves...
452
00:20:32,606 --> 00:20:34,525
that between 11:00 and 11:20,
453
00:20:34,525 --> 00:20:37,695
my client's mouth was
full of love, not cake.
454
00:20:37,695 --> 00:20:40,656
And with that, I rest my case.
455
00:20:40,656 --> 00:20:43,242
- I don't believe it.
- [alarm ringing]
456
00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:46,412
[Nancy] Cricket Green?
I find you... not guilty!
457
00:20:46,412 --> 00:20:47,913
[cheering]
458
00:20:47,913 --> 00:20:50,040
Do the innocence wave
with me, Ma!
459
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,168
Tilly, thank you for
trusting sibling code.
460
00:20:52,168 --> 00:20:54,462
And for knowing me better
than anyone else.
461
00:20:54,462 --> 00:20:56,172
I love you, baby brother.
462
00:20:56,172 --> 00:20:58,841
Cricket, I am so sorry.
I almost grounded you
463
00:20:58,841 --> 00:21:00,634
for something you didn't do.
464
00:21:00,634 --> 00:21:02,386
It's okay.
I usually done it.
465
00:21:02,386 --> 00:21:05,222
But if Cricket didn't eat
the cake, who did?
466
00:21:05,222 --> 00:21:07,475
There's gotta be
something we're missing.
467
00:21:07,475 --> 00:21:10,561
And now for a poem,
"From the Fires of my Heart."
468
00:21:10,561 --> 00:21:12,938
[clears throat]
"G is for..."
469
00:21:13,606 --> 00:21:16,692
What the...
I know who did it!
470
00:21:16,692 --> 00:21:19,820
I know who took the cake!
471
00:21:19,820 --> 00:21:22,448
- [all gasping]
- [slurping]
472
00:21:22,448 --> 00:21:24,575
Hello, Dad.
473
00:21:24,575 --> 00:21:26,285
- [kids] Grandpa?
- [Bill and Gramma] Nick?
474
00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:29,872
Hey! That's me.
Dad Grandpa Nick.
475
00:21:32,917 --> 00:21:36,587
♪ I got sweat in my eyes ♪
476
00:21:36,587 --> 00:21:38,130
♪ Lost a bet and got ♪
477
00:21:38,130 --> 00:21:40,049
♪ Bit by a hundred flies ♪
478
00:21:40,049 --> 00:21:42,009
♪ I fell out a big old tree ♪
479
00:21:42,843 --> 00:21:45,971
♪ Hit every branch
And scraped up both my knees ♪
480
00:21:45,971 --> 00:21:48,432
♪ I got chased by a dog ♪
481
00:21:48,432 --> 00:21:51,393
♪ Kissed by a frog
Got a rash on my leg ♪
482
00:21:51,393 --> 00:21:54,146
♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪
483
00:21:54,146 --> 00:21:57,233
♪ I got splinters
in seven of ten ♪
484
00:21:57,233 --> 00:21:59,777
♪ And tomorrow
I'll do it all again ♪
35935
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