All language subtitles for 3rd Rock from the Sun - S04E20 - Alien Hunter (1080p x265 EDGE2020)_track3_[eng]

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt-PT Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,937 --> 00:00:05,270 Hi, guys. 2 00:00:05,272 --> 00:00:07,405 Hi, don. Hey, don. Oh, hey, don. 3 00:00:07,407 --> 00:00:10,008 Yeah, I just, you know, Happened to be In the neighborhood, and, uh, 4 00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:11,944 Here you go, dick. 5 00:00:11,946 --> 00:00:13,345 Happy birthday! 6 00:00:13,347 --> 00:00:15,480 It's your birthday? For me? 7 00:00:15,482 --> 00:00:17,783 Well, tomorrow. It's may 5, right? 8 00:00:17,785 --> 00:00:20,618 If that's what I said, That's what it is. 9 00:00:20,620 --> 00:00:21,619 May 5. 10 00:00:21,621 --> 00:00:22,987 What year? 11 00:00:22,989 --> 00:00:24,156 Every year. 12 00:00:25,425 --> 00:00:27,425 Well, I would have Dropped by tomorrow, 13 00:00:27,427 --> 00:00:28,927 But rumor has it 14 00:00:28,929 --> 00:00:30,428 That the, uh, fbi 15 00:00:30,430 --> 00:00:33,031 Has agents in town Looking for somebody. 16 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:34,832 Yeah, they might need Old donnie's help. 17 00:00:34,834 --> 00:00:36,035 Who are they Looking for? 18 00:00:36,037 --> 00:00:37,969 That's classified Information. 19 00:00:37,971 --> 00:00:39,705 You have no idea, Do you? 20 00:00:41,208 --> 00:00:43,242 That's also classified. 21 00:00:43,244 --> 00:00:45,977 Well, I gotta go. See you, sally. 22 00:00:45,979 --> 00:00:47,545 Tommy, dick, harry. 23 00:00:51,185 --> 00:00:54,085 You know, I--I just noticed that You're tom, dick, and harry. 24 00:00:58,191 --> 00:01:00,025 So? 25 00:01:00,027 --> 00:01:01,960 So tom, dick, and harry. 26 00:01:01,962 --> 00:01:04,996 You know, like "Every tom, dick, and harry." 27 00:01:04,998 --> 00:01:06,498 Well...That doesn't mean 28 00:01:06,500 --> 00:01:09,367 That it's a calculated Attempt on our part To seem average. 29 00:01:09,369 --> 00:01:12,003 Yeah. I mean, we just Picked names at random 30 00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:13,605 When we got here. 31 00:01:15,175 --> 00:01:17,309 I mean when we landed. 32 00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:20,345 Bye, don. 33 00:01:20,347 --> 00:01:21,513 Bye. 34 00:01:22,583 --> 00:01:24,149 Well, That was close. 35 00:01:24,151 --> 00:01:26,785 Wait a minute. Weren't you listening To what don just said? 36 00:01:26,787 --> 00:01:28,353 About our names Being suspicious? 37 00:01:28,355 --> 00:01:29,287 No, not that. 38 00:01:29,289 --> 00:01:30,622 About the fbi Being in town? 39 00:01:30,624 --> 00:01:31,623 No, no! 40 00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:34,092 About it being My birthday. 41 00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:36,294 Dick, it's your fake Birthday. 42 00:01:36,296 --> 00:01:38,864 And you're my fake family, And none of you remembered. 43 00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:42,100 Wait a minute. 44 00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:45,337 You're giving me A surprise party. 45 00:01:45,339 --> 00:01:46,371 No, we're not. 46 00:01:46,373 --> 00:01:48,707 [sing-song] Yes, you are. 47 00:01:48,709 --> 00:01:49,941 No, we're not. 48 00:01:49,943 --> 00:01:51,376 Yes, you are. 49 00:01:51,378 --> 00:01:53,645 You are throwing me A surprise birthday party Tomorrow night. 50 00:01:53,647 --> 00:01:54,546 That's an order. 51 00:01:54,548 --> 00:01:55,914 Wait. Tomorrow?! 52 00:01:55,916 --> 00:01:57,982 Yes! At 7 p.M. Sharp. 53 00:01:57,984 --> 00:01:59,317 Oh! Oh! 54 00:01:59,319 --> 00:02:01,219 I'm gonna be so surprised. 55 00:02:15,702 --> 00:02:38,357 Captioning made possible by Carsey-werner productions and The national broadcasting Company 56 00:02:39,926 --> 00:02:44,162 I, uh, have your exams, Everyone. 57 00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:45,597 But you didn't Grade these. 58 00:02:45,599 --> 00:02:47,799 Oh, man, he's not even Grading them anymore. 59 00:02:47,801 --> 00:02:49,734 Well, is there anyone here 60 00:02:49,736 --> 00:02:51,969 Who thinks They might have passed? 61 00:02:51,971 --> 00:02:53,338 Yeah. All right, then, 62 00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:56,341 The important thing Is that stapled to each exam 63 00:02:56,343 --> 00:02:58,777 Is an invitation To my birthday party. 64 00:02:58,779 --> 00:03:01,245 You're inviting us To your party? 65 00:03:01,247 --> 00:03:02,881 I didn't even think You liked us. 66 00:03:02,883 --> 00:03:04,950 Oh, bug. 67 00:03:04,952 --> 00:03:07,352 I don't. I like presents. 68 00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:10,121 Keep in mind, I will be aware 69 00:03:10,123 --> 00:03:12,623 Of any no-shows. 70 00:03:12,625 --> 00:03:14,125 You know, Dr. Solomon, 71 00:03:14,127 --> 00:03:16,627 This could be Interpreted As blackmail. 72 00:03:16,629 --> 00:03:18,196 Uh, no, caryn. 73 00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:19,798 It's extortion. 74 00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:22,967 He's a professor. He can't control Our social lives. 75 00:03:22,969 --> 00:03:24,202 So will you be there, Pitman? 76 00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:26,271 Are you kidding? I wouldn't miss it. 77 00:03:28,909 --> 00:03:31,476 [audience applauds And cheers] 78 00:03:38,752 --> 00:03:41,186 Eh--eh-- Have you been here All semester? 79 00:03:41,188 --> 00:03:43,121 Oh, no. I'm mrs. Everly, 80 00:03:43,123 --> 00:03:44,755 And this is my son ned. 81 00:03:44,757 --> 00:03:46,224 We're auditing your class. 82 00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:47,325 I wasn't informed. 83 00:03:47,327 --> 00:03:49,527 Oh, my goodness, You're smart. 84 00:03:49,529 --> 00:03:50,662 Oh. 85 00:03:50,664 --> 00:03:53,165 Oh, my goodness, You're perceptive. 86 00:03:53,167 --> 00:03:55,167 Everyone told us What a genius you are, 87 00:03:55,169 --> 00:03:56,734 And, boy, Were they right. 88 00:03:56,736 --> 00:03:58,670 You're very unusual. 89 00:03:58,672 --> 00:04:01,139 Mama likes The unusual. 90 00:04:01,141 --> 00:04:04,042 Oh, now, ned, Let's not bore The great man. 91 00:04:04,044 --> 00:04:05,577 Well, I hope To see you again. 92 00:04:05,579 --> 00:04:07,078 You can count on it. 93 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,247 [bell rings] 94 00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:11,249 Ok, people, Your assignment is 95 00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:14,219 To discuss what gifts You will be buying For me. 96 00:04:14,221 --> 00:04:15,787 And--and, seriously, 97 00:04:15,789 --> 00:04:17,289 Try to top each other, 98 00:04:17,291 --> 00:04:18,390 Can you? 99 00:04:24,231 --> 00:04:26,531 Hi. Is dr. Solomon in? 100 00:04:26,533 --> 00:04:28,600 Why, yes, I am. 101 00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:29,901 Dr. dick solomon. 102 00:04:29,903 --> 00:04:31,703 Oh, that dr. Solomon. 103 00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:33,671 He's not your type. 104 00:04:33,673 --> 00:04:36,874 I'm from the pendleton Fax line maintenance Department. 105 00:04:36,876 --> 00:04:38,710 Don't you mean You're a phone guy? 106 00:04:38,712 --> 00:04:41,446 He knows what he is. 107 00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:45,617 The fax machine Would be here In my office. 108 00:04:45,619 --> 00:04:47,652 Where I am. 109 00:04:47,654 --> 00:04:49,554 Thanks. 110 00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:53,124 How do I look? 111 00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:54,892 Lose the sweater. 112 00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:02,167 This is for you. 113 00:05:02,169 --> 00:05:05,236 It's an invitation To my surprise Birthday party. 114 00:05:05,238 --> 00:05:07,171 If you're handing out Invitations, 115 00:05:07,173 --> 00:05:08,473 How can it be a surprise? 116 00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:09,908 Mary, it won't be 117 00:05:09,910 --> 00:05:12,510 If you keep waving The invitation around. 118 00:05:12,512 --> 00:05:14,913 Now, put that someplace Where I won't see it. 119 00:05:14,915 --> 00:05:15,913 Nina! 120 00:05:15,915 --> 00:05:18,250 Oh, uh, nina, This is for you. 121 00:05:18,252 --> 00:05:20,252 You must be dr. Solomon. 122 00:05:20,254 --> 00:05:22,754 Yes. Would you Like to come To my surprise party? 123 00:05:22,756 --> 00:05:25,423 Don't you have somewhere You have to be? 124 00:05:25,425 --> 00:05:26,791 No. 125 00:05:29,429 --> 00:05:30,762 Mama! 126 00:05:30,764 --> 00:05:32,263 I found his door. 127 00:05:34,033 --> 00:05:36,167 Good. 128 00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:38,270 That must be His desk. 129 00:05:38,272 --> 00:05:40,272 Ned, get mama A chair. 130 00:05:40,274 --> 00:05:42,207 Ok, mama. 131 00:05:42,209 --> 00:05:43,775 May I help you? 132 00:05:43,777 --> 00:05:45,376 No, you can't. 133 00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:50,682 Ned, honey, Go back to the motel And wait. 134 00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:53,318 I'm going To the motel now. 135 00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:54,986 That's nice. 136 00:05:56,323 --> 00:05:57,989 I'm going! I'm going! 137 00:05:58,992 --> 00:06:00,492 Well, mrs. Everly, Hello. 138 00:06:00,494 --> 00:06:02,494 Oh, please call me Charlotte. 139 00:06:02,496 --> 00:06:04,529 All right. Charlotte. 140 00:06:05,598 --> 00:06:07,866 Dr. Solomon, I have a confession. 141 00:06:07,868 --> 00:06:10,135 I'm not some housewife Auditing a class. 142 00:06:10,137 --> 00:06:11,436 You're not? 143 00:06:11,438 --> 00:06:12,637 No. I'm a reporter 144 00:06:12,639 --> 00:06:13,905 From the cleveland plain dealer, 145 00:06:13,907 --> 00:06:15,306 And I want to do A story on you. 146 00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:16,974 On me? 147 00:06:16,976 --> 00:06:19,143 Yes, you see, Every year a do a piece On greatness. 148 00:06:19,145 --> 00:06:21,946 Ha ha ha ha ha! 149 00:06:23,650 --> 00:06:25,116 Sorry. 150 00:06:25,118 --> 00:06:27,619 I've done all sorts Of research on you, 151 00:06:27,621 --> 00:06:30,321 And frankly, I'm impressed. Will you grant me An interview? 152 00:06:30,323 --> 00:06:33,825 All right. But I must ask you To limit your discussion 153 00:06:33,827 --> 00:06:35,326 To my greatness. 154 00:06:35,328 --> 00:06:37,228 Uh, nina. 155 00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:38,296 What?! 156 00:06:38,298 --> 00:06:39,731 I'm going to lunch now. 157 00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:40,732 Then go. 158 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:42,233 Come along, charlotte. 159 00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:44,736 As to greatness, I find that Some are born great, 160 00:06:44,738 --> 00:06:46,237 Some achieve greatness, 161 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:47,939 And some Thrust their greatness Upon others. 162 00:06:52,612 --> 00:06:54,545 Ok, so we got 10 of those. 163 00:06:54,547 --> 00:06:57,448 Just bring the chairs back When your party's over. 164 00:06:57,450 --> 00:06:59,017 What? These are not chairs. 165 00:06:59,019 --> 00:07:00,451 They're folding chairs. 166 00:07:00,453 --> 00:07:02,254 Aah! 167 00:07:02,256 --> 00:07:04,689 Uh, I got a folding table If you need it. 168 00:07:04,691 --> 00:07:07,058 A folding table! 169 00:07:07,060 --> 00:07:08,894 Get outta town! 170 00:07:10,130 --> 00:07:12,864 Well, you could always Use it for the bar. 171 00:07:12,866 --> 00:07:14,299 Bar? Why do we Need a bar? 172 00:07:14,301 --> 00:07:17,235 Well, it's a party, You know. You gotta serve drinks, 173 00:07:17,237 --> 00:07:18,603 Liquor, whatnot. 174 00:07:18,605 --> 00:07:21,606 Ok. Booze. How much do we get? 175 00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:25,109 I always figure 3/4 of an ounce of liquor 176 00:07:25,111 --> 00:07:27,178 Per 10 pounds of guest. 177 00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:30,148 Now, for a 200-pound man, You're gonna need 178 00:07:30,150 --> 00:07:32,550 About a half a quart Of vodka. 179 00:07:32,552 --> 00:07:34,218 Great. Now I gotta Call everybody 180 00:07:34,220 --> 00:07:36,154 To ask them How much they weigh. 181 00:07:36,156 --> 00:07:38,056 Put me down At 300 pounds. 182 00:07:40,527 --> 00:07:42,060 Well, I... 183 00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:44,829 I'm big-boned. 184 00:07:47,868 --> 00:07:49,868 Believe me when I say 185 00:07:49,870 --> 00:07:51,436 I know a lot. 186 00:07:51,438 --> 00:07:53,472 Some of it I don't dare teach. 187 00:07:53,474 --> 00:07:54,873 It's a terrible dilemma. 188 00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:56,374 My students are slow, 189 00:07:56,376 --> 00:07:58,877 And I am Incredibly smart. 190 00:07:58,879 --> 00:08:01,913 Shouldn't you be Writing this down? It's really good. 191 00:08:03,617 --> 00:08:06,351 I have a confession To make. 192 00:08:06,353 --> 00:08:07,852 I'm not a reporter. 193 00:08:07,854 --> 00:08:09,020 You're not? 194 00:08:09,022 --> 00:08:10,588 Oh, please forgive me. 195 00:08:10,590 --> 00:08:12,524 I'm just One of those people 196 00:08:12,526 --> 00:08:15,092 Who craves being around Personal excellence. 197 00:08:15,094 --> 00:08:17,662 I guess you could say I'm the intellectual Equivalent 198 00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:19,064 Of a rock 'n' roll groupie. 199 00:08:19,066 --> 00:08:20,164 Ohh...Well, 200 00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:21,132 That's ok. 201 00:08:21,134 --> 00:08:23,068 I've always Thought of myself 202 00:08:23,070 --> 00:08:25,737 As the intellectual Equivalent of Rod stewart. 203 00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:29,440 So have I. Ever since I read your essay 204 00:08:29,442 --> 00:08:30,942 In the university paper. 205 00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:33,945 My open letter to former Transportation secretary Frederico peña 206 00:08:33,947 --> 00:08:36,447 About the benefits Of time travel? 207 00:08:36,449 --> 00:08:38,650 That's the one. And I thought, 208 00:08:38,652 --> 00:08:41,419 How did this brilliant mind Suddenly appear Out of nowhere 209 00:08:41,421 --> 00:08:42,987 In the middle of ohio? 210 00:08:42,989 --> 00:08:45,256 That's when I knew I had to come and find you. 211 00:08:45,258 --> 00:08:47,825 You know something, Charlotte? 212 00:08:47,827 --> 00:08:50,828 I'm having a surprise Birthday party Tomorrow night. 213 00:08:50,830 --> 00:08:54,232 Why don't you come? And--and buy me Something nice. 214 00:08:56,102 --> 00:08:59,304 Well, what do I get For the man Who knows everything? 215 00:08:59,306 --> 00:09:01,406 Cashmere underpants. 216 00:09:05,645 --> 00:09:08,413 You see, what I would do Is cut up some vegetables 217 00:09:08,415 --> 00:09:11,716 And then hollow out A pretty red cabbage And put your dip in it. 218 00:09:11,718 --> 00:09:12,984 It's genius! 219 00:09:12,986 --> 00:09:15,520 Oh, charlotte, Thank god you stopped by. 220 00:09:15,522 --> 00:09:17,255 Where did dick Find you? 221 00:09:17,257 --> 00:09:19,257 Hey. What's ned doing? 222 00:09:19,259 --> 00:09:21,993 Heh heh. 223 00:09:21,995 --> 00:09:24,996 He probably just smells Peanut butter. 224 00:09:24,998 --> 00:09:27,498 Yeah, yeah. I'm the same way. 225 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:30,001 Charlotte. What are you Doing here? 226 00:09:30,003 --> 00:09:31,169 Only saving our butts. 227 00:09:31,171 --> 00:09:33,070 Yeah. Mrs. Dubcek, She was our party Expert, 228 00:09:33,072 --> 00:09:34,772 But she's gone and Disappeared on us. 229 00:09:34,774 --> 00:09:37,007 But god sent us down This angel. 230 00:09:37,009 --> 00:09:38,576 Oh, hush, now. 231 00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:41,713 I'm just doing my part To celebrate A great man's birthday. 232 00:09:41,715 --> 00:09:45,883 Just when I think You're too good To be true, you are. 233 00:09:47,153 --> 00:09:48,219 Mama. 234 00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:50,321 They don't have a sofa. 235 00:09:53,126 --> 00:09:56,427 Well, anyway, She knows everything About organizing a party. 236 00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:59,364 Oh, yeah. Tell him About that soup mix With the sour cream. 237 00:09:59,366 --> 00:10:01,599 Oh, now, it's on The back of the packet. 238 00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:03,702 They put your recipe On the back Of the packet? 239 00:10:03,704 --> 00:10:05,169 She's been published! 240 00:10:05,171 --> 00:10:07,038 I can't believe You're all 241 00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:08,973 Putting my Number-one fan To work. 242 00:10:08,975 --> 00:10:11,476 Oh...Pish tosh. 243 00:10:11,478 --> 00:10:15,113 I have a confession. 244 00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:20,251 Before I came here, I was social director For carnival cruise lines, 245 00:10:20,253 --> 00:10:25,189 And...If only I had a list So I'd know how many people Were coming. 246 00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:30,028 We have such a list. 247 00:10:30,030 --> 00:10:31,696 A guest list. 248 00:10:31,698 --> 00:10:34,499 Harry, go get it! It's in the other room! 249 00:10:43,176 --> 00:10:44,876 You know, I don't get to say this 250 00:10:44,878 --> 00:10:46,344 To a lot of people, But... 251 00:10:46,346 --> 00:10:48,980 I'm smarter than you. 252 00:10:54,688 --> 00:10:56,454 Hello, bug? 253 00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:58,489 Yes, uh, I'm calling to tell you 254 00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:00,391 That dr. Solomon's party Has been canceled. 255 00:11:00,393 --> 00:11:04,896 He has a terrible case Of diarrhea and he wants Everyone to know. 256 00:11:04,898 --> 00:11:06,998 Yes. Bye-bye. 257 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,499 Have you got everything? 258 00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:09,600 Yes, mama. 259 00:11:09,602 --> 00:11:10,601 Good boy. 260 00:11:10,603 --> 00:11:12,103 [thumping] 261 00:11:12,105 --> 00:11:13,371 Hey, you! 262 00:11:13,373 --> 00:11:15,373 Charlotte: Titty titty bang bang. 263 00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:19,177 One more noise Out of you 264 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:22,613 And ned here Will pop your neck Like a pencil. 265 00:11:22,615 --> 00:11:24,816 I got my eye on you. 266 00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:29,187 Ooh. 267 00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,888 I got you something. 268 00:11:30,890 --> 00:11:32,356 Happy birthday. 269 00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:35,293 Don't you want to Give that to me later, 270 00:11:35,295 --> 00:11:37,395 Should some sort of... Party arise? 271 00:11:37,397 --> 00:11:40,064 I got a message The party was canceled. 272 00:11:40,066 --> 00:11:41,231 Right. 273 00:11:41,233 --> 00:11:42,333 Very good. 274 00:11:42,335 --> 00:11:44,268 I got that message, too. 275 00:11:44,270 --> 00:11:48,339 Mm. So I guess I won't be seeing Either of you 276 00:11:48,341 --> 00:11:49,874 Around, uh, 7:00-ish? 277 00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:51,309 That's right. 278 00:11:51,311 --> 00:11:52,877 Good. Good. 279 00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:54,512 Oh, oh, and by the way, 280 00:11:54,514 --> 00:11:56,413 Don't forget to park Where I can't see Your car. 281 00:11:56,415 --> 00:11:57,748 Not a problem. 282 00:11:57,750 --> 00:12:01,852 Yep. I'll never See it coming. 283 00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:09,094 Well, well, here I am. 284 00:12:10,163 --> 00:12:12,663 Home at last. 285 00:12:12,665 --> 00:12:15,433 Hello! 286 00:12:15,435 --> 00:12:19,070 Anybody ho-o-ome?! 287 00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:20,438 I guess I'm here 288 00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:38,990 All alo-one! 289 00:12:40,660 --> 00:12:43,728 [drill buzzes] 290 00:12:43,730 --> 00:12:45,029 Mama. 291 00:12:45,031 --> 00:12:46,397 He's comin' around. 292 00:12:46,399 --> 00:12:47,899 Uh--uh, charlotte, 293 00:12:47,901 --> 00:12:49,266 Uh, wh-wh-what Are you doing? 294 00:12:49,268 --> 00:12:51,302 Well, first we're gonna Cut your head open. 295 00:12:51,304 --> 00:12:52,937 What? Why?! 296 00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:53,871 Oh, I don't know. 297 00:12:53,873 --> 00:12:55,439 Could it possibly be Because 298 00:12:55,441 --> 00:12:56,374 You're an alien?! 299 00:12:56,376 --> 00:12:57,441 Alien? 300 00:12:57,443 --> 00:12:59,510 [high-pitched Nervous laugh] Ha ha ha ha! 301 00:12:59,512 --> 00:13:00,945 That's funny. 302 00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:03,414 You're a very funny Woman. Ha ha ha... 303 00:13:03,416 --> 00:13:04,916 You think I'm stupid? 304 00:13:04,918 --> 00:13:07,218 I've been watching you For over a year now, 305 00:13:07,220 --> 00:13:08,786 And all signs Point to alien. 306 00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:10,722 W-well, Don't some signs 307 00:13:10,724 --> 00:13:14,192 Point to eccentric Or dutch or something? 308 00:13:14,194 --> 00:13:18,229 There are powerful Electromagnetic signals Coming from this house. 309 00:13:18,231 --> 00:13:21,599 Oh, we've been Microwaving With the door open. 310 00:13:21,601 --> 00:13:24,769 There's a transmitter Here somewhere. 311 00:13:24,771 --> 00:13:26,337 And we can't find it. 312 00:13:26,339 --> 00:13:28,573 I have a theory It's installed 313 00:13:28,575 --> 00:13:29,641 Inside of you. 314 00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:30,642 [drill buzzes] 315 00:13:30,644 --> 00:13:33,211 Help! Help! Help! Help! He-- 316 00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:34,145 Don: hello? 317 00:13:34,147 --> 00:13:36,214 Hello! Is anybody home? 318 00:13:36,216 --> 00:13:38,449 Damn! Go see who that is. 319 00:13:42,154 --> 00:13:43,153 Hi. 320 00:13:43,155 --> 00:13:44,722 Who are you? 321 00:13:44,724 --> 00:13:47,158 Uh... 322 00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:49,927 Mama, there's A policeman out here. 323 00:13:49,929 --> 00:13:51,796 Hello, officer. 324 00:13:51,798 --> 00:13:54,198 Hi. Uh, you two Here for the party? 325 00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:55,700 Oh, didn't you Get a call? 326 00:13:55,702 --> 00:13:57,168 No. When's it start? 327 00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:58,670 You know, I'm on duty. 328 00:13:58,672 --> 00:14:02,773 I'm only gonna have time For, like 2 or 3 drinks. 329 00:14:02,775 --> 00:14:04,342 Where is everybody? 330 00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:05,810 Well, it's a surprise party, 331 00:14:05,812 --> 00:14:08,179 So everybody's hiding Down in the basement. 332 00:14:08,181 --> 00:14:09,347 Oh. Ha ha ha! 333 00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:10,415 Ha ha ha ha. 334 00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:11,449 Ha ha. 335 00:14:15,422 --> 00:14:16,454 You're who again? 336 00:14:16,456 --> 00:14:17,521 Oh. 337 00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:18,522 Catering. 338 00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:19,523 [snaps rubber glove] 339 00:14:19,525 --> 00:14:21,058 Ah! Ha ha ha... 340 00:14:21,060 --> 00:14:22,526 Come on, let's go! 341 00:14:22,528 --> 00:14:23,962 Oh, ok. 342 00:14:23,964 --> 00:14:24,962 After you. 343 00:14:24,964 --> 00:14:27,331 No, after you. 344 00:14:27,333 --> 00:14:29,767 Yaaahh! 345 00:14:33,340 --> 00:14:36,374 Wow. I haven't been Drugged and tied Up like this 346 00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:37,775 Since valentine's day. 347 00:14:39,178 --> 00:14:41,412 Ohh! 348 00:14:41,414 --> 00:14:42,513 It's don! He's captured them 349 00:14:42,515 --> 00:14:43,814 And come to rescue us. 350 00:14:47,754 --> 00:14:48,753 Oh... 351 00:14:48,755 --> 00:14:52,056 Why does he Have to be so tired? 352 00:14:53,126 --> 00:14:54,591 Tommy: all right, That is it! 353 00:14:54,593 --> 00:14:55,793 What is going on here? 354 00:14:55,795 --> 00:14:57,195 Like you don't know. 355 00:14:57,197 --> 00:14:58,696 I just wish I knew 356 00:14:58,698 --> 00:15:00,764 Which one of you Has the transmitter. 357 00:15:00,766 --> 00:15:03,367 That's the head I really want to cut open. 358 00:15:04,670 --> 00:15:06,471 ♪ la la la... ♪ 359 00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:32,430 [telephone rings] 360 00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:33,831 I'll get it. 361 00:15:35,701 --> 00:15:36,968 Mary albright's office. 362 00:15:36,970 --> 00:15:39,837 Mmmph! Mmphmmphh! 363 00:15:39,839 --> 00:15:40,838 Oh, yeah. 364 00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:42,607 Oh, baby. Mmmphhgghh! 365 00:15:42,609 --> 00:15:44,708 Mmphhhgh! I'm hot now. 366 00:15:44,710 --> 00:15:46,477 Do me. Mmmphh! 367 00:15:46,479 --> 00:15:48,145 Mmmphhh! Do me all night. 368 00:15:48,147 --> 00:15:49,713 Aahmmphhh! 369 00:15:50,917 --> 00:15:53,917 I know it's you, dick. 370 00:15:55,020 --> 00:15:57,221 [muffled] Damn! 371 00:15:57,223 --> 00:15:59,156 That was dick? 372 00:15:59,158 --> 00:16:02,626 Yes, with his typical Sick, pathetic Cry for attention. 373 00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:05,562 Oh, god, It is his birthday, 374 00:16:05,564 --> 00:16:07,565 And his party Was canceled. 375 00:16:07,567 --> 00:16:11,068 I think I'm just gonna bring His present on over there. 376 00:16:11,070 --> 00:16:12,503 I'll go with you. 377 00:16:12,505 --> 00:16:15,005 I want to see The look on his face 378 00:16:15,007 --> 00:16:16,406 When I tell him I didn't get him Anything. 379 00:16:19,445 --> 00:16:22,446 Dialing the phone With your nose. 380 00:16:22,448 --> 00:16:24,615 A classic alien maneuver. 381 00:16:26,319 --> 00:16:29,220 Once I'm done with you, Everyone will know the truth. 382 00:16:29,222 --> 00:16:30,654 Go on, admit it. You're aliens! 383 00:16:30,656 --> 00:16:31,822 No! 384 00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:33,757 Oh, well, maybe I'm just wasting my time 385 00:16:33,759 --> 00:16:34,992 With you, then. 386 00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:37,228 Maybe I'll just Go down there To the basement 387 00:16:37,230 --> 00:16:38,662 And crack open That big blonde's head. 388 00:16:38,664 --> 00:16:41,399 Uh--no! No! No! Wait! 389 00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:44,868 All right, I admit it. I'm an alien. 390 00:16:44,870 --> 00:16:46,337 I knew it. 391 00:16:46,339 --> 00:16:47,771 But I'm the only one. 392 00:16:47,773 --> 00:16:49,773 The other three Are innocent bystanders. 393 00:16:49,775 --> 00:16:51,775 Do what you will With me! 394 00:16:51,777 --> 00:16:55,279 Which I hope Is a severe scolding. 395 00:16:55,281 --> 00:16:56,747 But spare them! 396 00:16:56,749 --> 00:16:57,781 I don't think so. 397 00:16:57,783 --> 00:16:59,783 Why are you doing this? 398 00:16:59,785 --> 00:17:01,785 We come in peace! We mean you no harm. 399 00:17:01,787 --> 00:17:03,354 No harm? 400 00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:05,789 I'm well aware Of what your kind does. 401 00:17:05,791 --> 00:17:07,791 Harvesting eggs For your slave race, 402 00:17:07,793 --> 00:17:09,793 Sucking the life From the innocent, 403 00:17:09,795 --> 00:17:12,896 Probing the butt Of the poor american Farmer! 404 00:17:12,898 --> 00:17:15,700 We never do any of that. 405 00:17:15,702 --> 00:17:20,237 Well, there was This one farmer Near akron. 406 00:17:20,239 --> 00:17:21,305 You know... 407 00:17:21,307 --> 00:17:24,175 But he was asking for it! 408 00:17:24,177 --> 00:17:25,643 I've heard enough! Cork him! 409 00:17:25,645 --> 00:17:27,979 No! No! Please! Let me--aah-- 410 00:17:27,981 --> 00:17:29,213 Dr. Solomon? 411 00:17:29,215 --> 00:17:30,681 Dr. Solomon? 412 00:17:30,683 --> 00:17:31,748 Excuse me. 413 00:17:31,750 --> 00:17:33,317 What are you doing here? 414 00:17:33,319 --> 00:17:36,320 I called you and told you There was no party. 415 00:17:36,322 --> 00:17:37,421 Yeah, I know. 416 00:17:37,423 --> 00:17:38,922 But sometimes dr. Solomon 417 00:17:38,924 --> 00:17:40,924 Will do things To trick me, 418 00:17:40,926 --> 00:17:42,426 And then he yells at me. 419 00:17:42,428 --> 00:17:43,795 Uh, you know, 420 00:17:43,797 --> 00:17:45,997 All the other guests Are hiding in the basement, 421 00:17:45,999 --> 00:17:47,431 So come on, let's go. 422 00:17:47,433 --> 00:17:49,533 I knew There was a party. Oh. 423 00:17:49,535 --> 00:17:51,001 Oh, no, no. After you. 424 00:17:51,003 --> 00:17:53,838 Mary: hello! 425 00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:56,340 I thought we were Going downstairs. 426 00:17:56,342 --> 00:17:57,408 Not just yet. 427 00:17:57,410 --> 00:17:59,710 Oh, I left my gift In the car. 428 00:17:59,712 --> 00:18:00,777 I'll be right back. 429 00:18:00,779 --> 00:18:01,946 Shouldn't we be Getting to the basement? 430 00:18:01,948 --> 00:18:03,948 Uh... Before we go down, 431 00:18:03,950 --> 00:18:05,115 How about a nice Glass of wine? 432 00:18:05,117 --> 00:18:06,684 Yeah. All right. 433 00:18:06,686 --> 00:18:09,353 Honey, get that Special bottle Out of my bag. 434 00:18:09,355 --> 00:18:11,522 Come on, everybody, Into the kitchen. 435 00:18:11,524 --> 00:18:13,024 Let's move it! Grab your glass! 436 00:18:13,026 --> 00:18:14,091 I don't have all day. 437 00:18:15,161 --> 00:18:16,694 I think You'll like this. 438 00:18:16,696 --> 00:18:18,228 It's A very good year. 439 00:18:18,230 --> 00:18:20,164 I'm afraid I don't like red wine. 440 00:18:20,166 --> 00:18:21,666 I love it. 441 00:18:21,668 --> 00:18:24,702 Ha ha ha ha ha ha! 442 00:18:24,704 --> 00:18:26,570 Pour hers first. 443 00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:30,507 Don't we need A toast? 444 00:18:30,509 --> 00:18:31,675 All right. 445 00:18:31,677 --> 00:18:33,410 Here's a toast To happy birthdays. 446 00:18:33,412 --> 00:18:35,946 Happy birthdays! Happy birthdays! 447 00:18:39,218 --> 00:18:40,350 Hmm. 448 00:18:40,352 --> 00:18:42,219 What's that aftertaste? 449 00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:47,891 Mary: hello! I'm back! 450 00:18:47,893 --> 00:18:49,793 Oh, crap! 451 00:18:51,197 --> 00:18:52,997 Did everyone Go downstairs? 452 00:18:52,999 --> 00:18:56,000 Oh, they went down, All right. 453 00:18:56,002 --> 00:18:57,667 Shut up, honey. 454 00:18:57,669 --> 00:18:59,203 Where's The birthday boy? 455 00:18:59,205 --> 00:19:00,470 Oh, he's late. 456 00:19:00,472 --> 00:19:01,671 Of course. 457 00:19:01,673 --> 00:19:04,307 How about a glass of wine While you're waiting? 458 00:19:04,309 --> 00:19:08,679 It's so nice of you To help out, charlotte. 459 00:19:08,681 --> 00:19:10,214 Mm. 460 00:19:11,417 --> 00:19:12,483 Dick's late. 461 00:19:12,485 --> 00:19:13,684 That's typical. 462 00:19:16,789 --> 00:19:19,457 He plans his own Surprise party, 463 00:19:19,459 --> 00:19:21,425 And then It's called off, 464 00:19:21,427 --> 00:19:22,826 And then It's back on. 465 00:19:26,465 --> 00:19:30,668 I guess we don't know Whether it's on or off! 466 00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:34,438 Mmm. This is screw-top. This is good. 467 00:19:40,546 --> 00:19:43,547 If dick's not here In 15 minutes, I am leaving. 468 00:19:43,549 --> 00:19:45,749 When a man doesn't have The common courtesy to-- 469 00:19:45,751 --> 00:19:46,984 Ooh! 470 00:19:48,921 --> 00:19:50,387 It's official. 471 00:19:50,389 --> 00:19:53,390 This is the worst party I've ever been to. 472 00:19:54,393 --> 00:19:55,493 Sally! 473 00:19:55,495 --> 00:19:57,995 Stand with me If you can. 474 00:19:57,997 --> 00:19:59,463 Uhh! Uhh! 475 00:19:59,465 --> 00:20:01,965 I have a--a jackknife In my pocket. 476 00:20:01,967 --> 00:20:04,302 If you can reach it, We can cut through These ropes. 477 00:20:04,304 --> 00:20:05,303 All right. 478 00:20:05,305 --> 00:20:06,771 Harry, lean to your left. 479 00:20:06,773 --> 00:20:07,772 Ok. 480 00:20:07,774 --> 00:20:09,339 Sally, turn right. Turn right. 481 00:20:09,341 --> 00:20:10,875 All right. And it's-- 482 00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:13,077 Can you feel it? It's right where Your hand is. 483 00:20:13,079 --> 00:20:14,579 I can't reach it. 484 00:20:14,581 --> 00:20:16,513 Keep trying. You're almost there. 485 00:20:16,515 --> 00:20:17,648 All right. Yeah. 486 00:20:17,650 --> 00:20:19,550 Yeah. Oh. Oh. 487 00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:21,485 Ok, careful, sally, That's not... 488 00:20:21,487 --> 00:20:22,486 Uh... 489 00:20:22,488 --> 00:20:23,487 Oh... 490 00:20:23,489 --> 00:20:24,488 Ohh... 491 00:20:24,490 --> 00:20:26,156 Ooh, boy. 492 00:20:26,158 --> 00:20:27,758 I got it. 493 00:20:32,265 --> 00:20:34,632 Well, don't just Stand there. Cut us out. 494 00:20:36,602 --> 00:20:38,068 You know, 495 00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:41,004 I've never been In a hostage situation Before, 496 00:20:41,006 --> 00:20:44,574 But I think you should be Ashamed of yourself. 497 00:20:47,613 --> 00:20:48,612 [buzzing] 498 00:20:48,614 --> 00:20:51,415 Oh, my god, dick! 499 00:20:51,417 --> 00:20:52,582 Oh, god! Oh, my god! 500 00:20:52,584 --> 00:20:54,451 Stand back Or the spaceman gets it! 501 00:20:54,453 --> 00:20:56,454 Freeze, everybody! Oh, my god! 502 00:20:56,456 --> 00:20:57,521 Fbi! Freeze! 503 00:20:57,523 --> 00:20:58,522 Ned: mama. 504 00:20:58,524 --> 00:20:59,823 Put those two In cuffs. 505 00:20:59,825 --> 00:21:01,124 Somebody untie that man. 506 00:21:01,126 --> 00:21:03,493 Charlotte: No! Don't you understand? 507 00:21:03,495 --> 00:21:05,062 He's one of them! 508 00:21:05,064 --> 00:21:07,397 Let me open him up. You'll see he's an alien. 509 00:21:07,399 --> 00:21:09,399 Yeah, right, charlotte. So were the other 8 You cut up. 510 00:21:09,401 --> 00:21:11,735 Ok, fine. But this one is. 511 00:21:11,737 --> 00:21:13,003 He admitted it. 512 00:21:13,005 --> 00:21:15,072 I know where you live. 513 00:21:15,074 --> 00:21:16,407 You can't hide! 514 00:21:16,409 --> 00:21:17,407 Aliens! 515 00:21:17,409 --> 00:21:20,176 Aliens! 516 00:21:23,216 --> 00:21:25,148 Aliens, huh? 517 00:21:25,150 --> 00:21:26,316 [all laughing] 518 00:21:26,318 --> 00:21:28,352 Yeah. 519 00:21:28,354 --> 00:21:30,487 That's the dumbest thing I ever heard! 520 00:21:32,891 --> 00:21:35,526 Captioning made possible by Carsey-werner productions and The national broadcasting Company 521 00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:41,031 You know, I couldn't help but notice You federal boys 522 00:21:41,033 --> 00:21:44,535 Left a crucial Piece of evidence At the crime scene. 523 00:21:44,537 --> 00:21:45,569 The gnome. 524 00:21:45,571 --> 00:21:47,004 The gnome? 525 00:21:47,006 --> 00:21:48,806 Yeah. The blunt instrument. 526 00:21:48,808 --> 00:21:50,608 And local boy donnie Picked it up for you. 527 00:21:50,610 --> 00:21:53,143 Yep. Just covering Your ass. 528 00:21:53,145 --> 00:21:56,413 Captioning performed by The national captioning Institute, inc. 529 00:21:56,415 --> 00:21:58,515 Shall we steal The car, mama? 530 00:21:58,517 --> 00:21:59,516 No, honey. 531 00:21:59,518 --> 00:22:01,752 That would be wrong. 532 00:22:01,754 --> 00:22:06,557 Public performance of captions Prohibited without permission of National captioning institute 37562

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.